#vampire that doesnt really like other vampires :(

[nashvillethotchicken]

Thinking about Lestat seeing Louis’s eating patterns as a waste of his gift/himself while Armand gives Louis food that he literally can not enjoy or digest just so he has something on his stomach

#if i had to give each of louis relationship a theme loustat would be shame and loumand would be enabling #which are both really bad ways of “helping” a partner with an ed #lestats shame and anger tactics only make louis more resentful and less likely to eat #while armand having the little drinks and exotic animals and the human food dont actually deal with louis problem head on- #cus at the end of the day louis is still not eating enough #and i think they really exemplifies both of their trauma and abandonment issues #both of them came up chronically food insecure #lestat was put into the role of provider at a very early age and stayed in that role until he died/was turned #so for him rejecting what lestat gives is like rejecting lestat cus he doesnt have anything else to make him “useful” #and lestats reaction to rejection is anger and control so he tries to shame and control louis into eating more/human #while armand has been abandoned by literally everyone he loves up till this point so for him its like #ok i can make people dtay if i give them what they want and what louis wants is to not feel bad about eating and so armand does that #but it still doesnt get to the root of the issue which is louis having poor coping mechanisms for his grief and other emotions #like either way you slice it. louis is not meeting his nutritional needs. he eats drinks from one guy eats a fox or some other small animal #when he should be having like two dudes at least #and then he has human food which according to anne rice makes vampires vomit up their whole stomach content so... #louis imma send you to my therapist shes great #interview with the vampire #iwtv #louis de pointe du lac #amc iwtv #lestat de lioncourt #ldpdl #iwtv 2022 #armand iwtv #armand #loumand #loustat #like armand gives louis food he cant eat just so he knows theres something in louis stomach even for a short while

[stuck-in-the-ghost-zone]

k, m, n, t for pd and/or suck!!! >:33333

K - What character has your favorite development arc/the best development arc?

-> you know i gotta say wiwi. i have to. that character was Made For Me i swear to GOD . genuinely i cannot think about prime defenders season 2 episode 39 without feeling physically sick bc i love it so much. its the only one i havent relistened to since i heard it the first time. i KNOW its gonna make me cry again so i genuienly have not touched it even though theres things in there i need to hear again for character research. his arc is so like. narratively satisfying in a way that hits me so fucking deep to my core in an extremely personal way. and like. there were definitely some Decisions that i was REALLY ANNOYING about hating when they were brought up because im used to media with bad storytelling/creators that do not care about their characters but. looking back on it i would not change a single thing about it. i love you wiwi so much.

-> FOR SUCK.... its not over yet. so i cannot definitively say. campaign finale comes out tomorrow so my answer may change depending on that but for right now i think i gotta say arthur. i joke a lot about hating arthur for no real reason in particular but. man his story is just REALLY good. not going 2 give you suck spoilers (hehe) but i also really like how shilo has grown through the campaign. hes my little guy :]

M - Name a character that you’d like to have for a friend.

-> TIDE. TIDE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TIDE TIDE TIDE I LOVE TIDE SO MUCH. thats my dad thats my best friend i love tide so much dude. every time he is mentioned or on screen i am just like :D HI TIDE I LOVE YOU TIDE

-> grefgore :] light of my life this is how i feel anytime i think about grefgore

N - Name three things you wish you saw more or in your main fandom (or a fandom of choice).

-> CHARACTER STUDIES. PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD. I LIKE A GOOD SHIPPING FIC AS MUCH AS THE NEXT GUY BUT PLEASE GOD WRITE THEM IN CHARACTER. EXPLORE THEIR THOUGHTS AND EMOTIONS AND WHY THEY MAKE CERTAIN DECISIONS THE WAY THEY DO. this doesnt even go for just pd and suck this is like. true for every single fandom ive ever fucking been in. do you know how hard it is to find character studies in the danny phantom tag on ao3. nobody has even fucking watched the show how are they going to write character studies they just want (<< i cannot legally finish this sentence without getting in so much trouble) I HAVE TO DO EVERYTHING MY FUCKING SELF AROUND HERE. ALL I EVER WRITE ARE CHARACTER STUDIES BC THATS THE WAY I THINK ABOUT CHARACTERS. I LOVE THEIR MOTIVATIONS I LOVE TO GET INSIDE THEIR BRAINS LIKE A LITTLE PARASITE AND IT IS ALWAYS SURPRISING TO ME WHEN OTHER PEOPLE DO NOT THINK LIKE THIS. (edit im just now reading through this and realized the question says three things. i did not process that. my three things are all more character studies please)

T - Do you have any hard and fast headcanons that you will die defending? 

-> oh dude i have so many hmmmmmmm how to choose just one. i have a LOT of feelings about wiwis original death and i might write something about that when i can get over my shrimp emotions about him. dakota cole audhd truther but that ones pretty much canon anyway so i dont think it counts. vyncent and his relationship with growing up in fantasy world and then being thrown into prime and how he adjusted to that. I think he really lies shitty syfy channel type horror movies that are so stupidly bad. and also plays a lot of video games but again i think thats mostly canon already. i think tide listens to dad rock but also like. ocean man by ween. you already know about my william and ashe being each others emotional support at concerts. i think william and ashe should hang out and do emo kid things more. i also have a lot of feelings about ashe and coping with the crippling loneliness of basically growing up alone and how the pd becoming like INSTANT best friends was so much for him in sooo many ways. you already know how i feel about mark i am in the middle of dissecting him like im in a high school biology class as we speak. uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh i know im gonna think of something really good after i hit the post button so stay tuned

#ive written like. maybe 2 shipping fics in recent years and one was while i was high on post-wisdom-teeth-surgery drugs #and the other has been in my wips for over a year bc i got to the quote unquote romantic part and ran out of all ideas #<< ive started working on this one again and instead of making them kiss i just went on for like . 4 more paragrapsh #about how the robot character finds it inconvenient to be in a body that visibly emotes. so that explains a lot i guess #the murderbot influence has hit me apparently #I DONT REALLY HAVE MANY SUCK HEADCANONS. as much as i loooove the suckening it doesnt like. grip me quite as hard as #pd and riptide do. #same with bitb! i fucking looooove bitb and i think about it so much but i dont necessarily have hcs for it because i like. #prefer the way canon is??? if that makes sense???? #I DO HOWEVER love to say the phrase “arthur bennett is a beautiful name for a butch lesbian” only bc i saw a piece of fanart with #that as the caption after like. epsiode 3. and it got stuck in my mind #oh also idk if ur here yet but arthur and deacon are also divorced father toxic exes in my mind. they totally fuck in a vampire style #(<< which is . ALSO a quote from a piece of fnaart that got stuck in my mind so fucking hard. they totally fuck in a vampire style. #i hate it here) #GODDD THANK U FOR LETTING ME RAMBLE. CAN YOU TELL IM NORMAL ABOUT THIS #asks #intertexts #friends!!!

[soldier-poet-king]

Sometimes I see the worst most wrong and MEAN and CALLOUS opinions on this site and it's like holy shit why the fuck did I learn to read + I get super fuckin upset, both angry and deeply disheartened/hurt.

However. I have decided that this is going to become a wider problem :) if I have to see everyone else's bad opinions, they also have to see mine >:)

#it doesnt really work #given that these are like. shitty political racist homophobic etc opinions #and my bad opinions are like. abt how i think vampires are hot. or talking about how body horror is a divine gift. #but yknow. i am trying not to be an angry person. despite yknow. being a fundamentally angry person #i am much better than i was. but its not something i grew out of or whatever when the brain settled at 25 #i really am just an angry person quick to jealous and rage. but trying so so so hard to be good and kind #trying even the harder because i know i am. so mad. all the time. #if i think something is important i cannot let it go. im incapable #i am so chill abt stuff that doesn't matter #but as soon as i percieve it to matter. ie. have an effect on others or be related to goodness or being a good person or whatever #i simply. cannot just move on. ocd obsessions + big hearted ness #the duality of fran

[moth-mart]

"I need them to die in eachothers arms and for it to mean something" then proceeded to make a terrible. horrible punch to the gut

#o. #ow????????? #its. coming off the future alt but sona's afflictions go from being chronic to terminal #and because of the mutations to his vampirism the only way to survive is to feed off of gods #which they find out the hard way when he gets *really* sick and nothing's helping so they panic and Stylus kills a god #as a last 'out of options' resort and he feeds off it and it *works* #and they come to that realization and Sona refuses to continue like that because he says hes not going to live off of other people's- #suffering anymore. and so he makes his choice and at some point they go to visit Will who's completely cut ties with them because she #blames god's death on them being cowards who didnt try hard enough to stop her #which she isnt happy to see that and doesnt take the news well at all and states that theyre just throwing god's sacrifice away by #letting him die which makes the situation even more conflicting for sona who muses on how even beyond the grave #god's putting him in shitty situations. of either living selfishly off of others' deaths or seemingly having let her die for nothing #and will storms off and Caraway [who she's living with now] tells them to stay the night so they do #but it doesnt even matter cause Sona gently wakes Stylus up in the middle of the night and tells him hes dying and so #they sit with eachother and just talk softly and reminisce about meeting the other and they both agree they wouldnt trade it for anything #then he dies very peacefully in Stylus' arms #and will wakes up the next morning and comes downstairs and Caraway gently informs her and she runs into the other room #and Stylus is still sitting there in the same spot just. holding whats left of him. unmoved for hours #AND THEN I HAD TO STOP BRUSHING MY TEETH. CAUSE WTF. MAN??? #the emotional damage may entirely be dependent on the emotional attachment level to these guys #and nothing otherwise but. if youre me. yknow. [shatters like glass] #MHMMH #cool #character death #I GUESS #sonaverse #delete tag #lore dump #very much a noncanon thing but. mmgnmgmg [wiggly sheet of metal noise]

[albatris]

#i was thinking about how #i dont think nat actually dislikes being a vampire lol #like its painful and a bit annoying but. but. i dont think he has nearly the same qualms lots of vampires do with Who Is Acceptable To Eat #like alex is in HELL bc it doesnt think its ok to murder at all and is still in hell even only #feeding on the absolute scum of the earth #nat eats rich pricks and abusive assholes. i think hed be fine with eating the occasional customer #like the really really gross ones who hurl abuse or slurs or have harassed other coworkers #like. if nat is ok with following riley's lead and hanging out at bars eating creeps or people who #say stupid sexist racist homophobic etc things #then this boy Definitely is ok with eating abusive customers right

[rearranging-deck-chairs]

wait interview with the vampire lives in a world with corona?

#feel like that really dates when it was written (complimentary) #feels strange now in 2022 to watch this when it feels like the so many people have moved on #doesnt it #yesterday i watched some news satire videos from 2020 #WEIRD #STRANGE #the other day went to get a booster and the nurse said i was the youngest person she'd seen yet for this booster #nobody thinks it exists anymore #i cant really tell whether it still exists tbh #i mean it exists but like. i cant tell whether im being overly cautious still wearing a mask #or whether thats just reasonable #cant assess the risk AT ALL #but neither can anyone else so #better to err on the side of caution especially when caution for me in this situation costs very little #anyway back to the point it kinda bums me out the vampires get those pale contacts

[tennessoui]

There are so many cool options for crossovers

For example a crossover with Kingsman would be cool. Obi-Wan could recruit Anakin and their relationship would be forbidden. Or there are both agents. Oh a James Bond crossover. Anakin is Q and Obi-Wan is James Bond who flirts nonstop. He doesn't realize that he already gets the best gadgets. A Stranger Things AU. Maybe one of them gets flayed and the other one will do everything to save him. Or a Teen Wolf AU. One is a werewolf and the other a puny human who has magic and gets possessed by a demon. 👀

oooo these are also amazing au options though i gotta be honest, i haven't seen kingsman so i can't really comment on that, but i've said it before and i'll say it again: i adore this one james bond-like fic called spare parts by mercy-me i think....though apparently it was taken down which sucks because it was literally my favorite obikin fic....the ingenuity...the prose....it was amazing and i miss her

BUT also there's another james bond fic im obsessed with by euryrice on ao3 called "i'd never be me (without the security of your loving arms)" and i adore it sososo much holy shit i can't wait to reread it now that i'm thinking about it

i could totally get behind a teen wolf au i used to love that show but it would be interesting to try and figure out how to make it also loyal to the star wars characters and the teen wolf universe......

#asks #which i think is one o the best parts of writing an au for anything #i think it would be interesting to see more werewolf or vampire obikin stuff tbh #i havent seen a lot but i feeel like that's super common in other fandoms #i have the one vampire fic #but its like vampire adjacent it doesnt really go into vampire stuff as much

[nashvillethotchicken]

A subtle way you can tell lestat is very selfish and ignorant about race, especially in ep 6 is that he said that they'd go to Argentina, a country which at the time was explicitly looking for white Europeans (including n*zis) to move there after spending decades pushing their black and Indigenous populations to the fringes of society to whiten up the country

#amc iwtv #iwtv #interview with the vampire #lestat de lioncourt #like i dont think hes doing it on purpose #i think he saw somewhere that takes Europeans and he sees claudia and louis as extensions of himself so if he'll be welcomed they'll be too #like i genuinely dont think he thought of moving somewhere that wasnt as segregated for the sake of louis or claudia #and to give the barest of credit. there wereny many places they could both go #lestat isnt allowed in europe cus of armand and them and louis and claudia cant move unencumbered through most of the us bc of segregation #like the only place they could go in the us at the time as an interracial family is ohio (only state with intteraccial marriage in 1940) #and they couldnt even be out there #so i understand leaving the country but picking a place that is already pushing its black population further into the fringes #is just another way to control the movements of louis and claudia. even if lestat doesnt realise or have that intent #like if they decide to leave him when theyre in Argentina theyre literally boned. especially in the 40s when all the n*zis are coming #and tou can see this in other parts of their relationship. like lestat is ok taking louis' to operas where louis has to be a valet to get in #he says that their money had protected them from legal backlash for being gay but not really for louis being black #lestat not getting the multiple microagressions from the lawyer #hell lestat even says “if he had offended you i would have killed him”. implying he doesn't believe that louis had a right to be offended #like lestat is ignorant to race especially in the american context and especially especially in other countries #hes white and french. they invented racism like there is a non 0 chance he saw saarah baartman displayed in a traveling circus in france #like i dont think he is outwardly racist like the alderman or tom but hes ignorant as hell. #he probably didnt see his first black person until he was 25

[misterradio]

stumbled upon this article about lgbt+ horror films and ough......... the conversation of the other and the queer going hand in hand hits

#original nonsense #personal #hmm hmmmmmhow do I put this. ive always wanted non-human characters to be able to find peace and happiness in movies #but that rarely happens and it's not only interesting to see that written out in here but also for the queer lens to be cast on it...!! #its not fair that being different should condemn anyone to a horrible fate. #for example i remember being really dissapointed by the lost boys cuz i didnt realize the vampires were The Evil That Needed Vanquishing #and i was fully expecting. well idk. jsut for them to have their own lives and space and coexistence i guess. #and it hurts when that doesnt happen >>__<< #because i see myself in that otherness and i want it to be possible to have a fulfilling life despite being Something Else #in whatever way that Else may be...... do you understand #edit: ppl have been liking my carrion posts lately and yknow what? this is why carrion is da best game ever 👍 the creature thrives

[gothmods]

Started watching interview with the vampire since i finally got in the right headspace ( watching of heavier things requires the right mood) but yeah wheres that post about lestat prancing around like a pony on ket i thought i bookmarked it and yet

#im only 2 episodes in but im very interested in his deal #not in a relating way more like i find him very emotionally immature in a weird way though since its clear he knows how to manipulate the #emotions of others #louis' character has a lot more in terms of looking at doubt and shame and ironically the complexities of very human experiences #i like him i think theyve done a really good job fleshing out a character you really feel for and also like #someone for whom vampirism as a vehicle to explore the negative works #i like his dynamic with daniel #the skepticism and bluntness is needed to keep things from getting too? #theatrical? idk like it brings louis back to reality in a way #reality as in it grounds him i suppose #im bad at explaining i just feel all the changes have made for a much more interesting louis but also one who you can connect with #meanwhile lestat is on another planet and its fun to watch but i do not feel for him and you can tell he doesnt retain any real connection #or at least thats what i think after 2 episodes #to having been human and behind his careful calculated actions he still feels very self centered in a careless impulsive kind of way #whereas even without daniels questioning louis clearly still exists as part of the world around him

[girlspecimen]

as much as i love the idea of being a vampire prince as like a cute fun lil aesthetic goal or silly online persona or whatever i do hesitate because that is, embarrassingly, the persona i adopted when i lived away from home for the first time and experienced very frequent, debilitating intrusive thoughts without knowing what they were nor what ocd really was. and i needed a way to cope with constantly locking myself inside out of fear of hurting someone

#thoughts #ocd #i would pretend i was a vampire prince who had to stay out of the sunlight and away from people so i wouldnt go even crazier cooped in #a very small stuffy room that i kept dark cuz i didnt want to see myself or open the windows for like weeks. as much as i could #not to get all vent-y it doesnt really hurt me too much compared to other stuff. im sure in a few years ill process it fully and itll hurt

[devotedlystrangewizard]

live footage of me trying to figure out who to romance with el (he will kill them)

#Gale's whole. um. explodey thing #since it activates when you kill him at the start im GUESSING it also activates when you kill him in ur DUrge scene #which maybe that isnt true but considering how much time passes between him dying & him blowing up the entire game #i dont want to risk it unless someone can tell me with absolute certainty that he doesnt blow up #i REALLY want karlach alive because i think her response to him going off the deep end & returning to who he used to be would be fun #he wouldnt like shadowheart and i dont like shadowheart enough so it wouldnt have any weight #& lae'zel is. i think el would like her but not be attracted to her. just really impressed #which leaves the vampire twink. i mean i GUESS #it also leaves wyll but i dont want to kill wyll #itll probably be astarion. probably #i do intend to romance him properly at some point but el killing loved ones because their corpses would be prettier. is such a massive part #of his character pre amnesia and i neeeeeed to pass that onto post amnesia el #maybe i wont kill anyone. maybe ill romance karlach and make her suffer soooo much. maybe ill quit halfway through act 1 because i felt bad #other than that i do have plans for playthroughs that arent evil & traumatizing i swear #ramblings #oc ramblings

[snekdood]

like i really dont think ya understand the severity of the abuse- even aside from the sexual abuse-

i have bpd and come from a home where im not validated very well (obviously, bc thats what makes ppl bpd in the first place). i meet this person who validates me in every way i could possibly imagine or want (love bombing). they pretend to like me so much that they start to become like me and pick up traits of mine they like the most. they know they have a hold over me and power over me bc i didnt know how to validate myself and they were the only source of validation i had. so then they go ahead and start invalidating me and acting like im less of me and theyre somehow more of me. i knew who i was deep down but suddenly i felt unseen again and silenced and pushed into a corner. and then they act like im a horrible person (discarding phase) and serve me an entirely different version of me thats not who i am, but bc i didnt know how to validate myself and was reliant on them (something thats particularly important for this type of abuse to work), it made me question myself and who i was and what i was like and what my intentions were and what my actions were and if i could even trust my own reality all over again when i really didn’t fucking need to since i knew who i was deep down, but they somehow convinced me they knew me better. because i was reliant on them. i dont think you understand how much that fucks with you.

#vent #this is why i kind of find it hard not to cling to the term 'narcissistic abuse' since this is verbatim what happens in that type of abuse. #based on everything ive read. #again. i dont personally think it necessarily has anything to do w ppl with npd. narcissism as a term existed before the diagnosis. #it means someone whos selfish and only looks out for themselves and will do anything for themselves even at the expense of others. #and literally EVERYTHING ELSE people online have said about this type of abuse happened. #the smear campaign. the sending people after me to stalk me and get info out of me. the apparently never leaving me alone as evidenced #by that anon recently. #oh and- cant forget accusing me of everything they did but 10x worse somehow. #if a certain type of abuse can be predicted so well and so many people have had the same experience or similar enough experiences #i dont see why it doesnt deserve its own term. we just have to divorce it from the idea of npd. maybe give it a different name. #because its really not *just* emotional abuse. sorry. #its so much more than that and so much more strategic. #and this is why even though i didnt think of them as being exactly like zero before i still thought of them as being vampiric. #bc they tried to drain me of my energy and who i was. #but nowadays i can really see the similarities. if only they were rich and had institutional power and paid politicans to oppress #minorities. then theyd be the same person. but im not gonna sit here and pretend thats the case. they're similar to him in so many ways but #theyre not the same person. im obviously able to fucking recognize that. #in spite of them pretending like i cant. #now if that ends up secretly being the case... well.... #might be harder for me to divorce them from being similar lmao. #but so far i dont have enough evidence to confidently say that.

[albatris]

#thinkin bout..... this #i would let u choose in the game but like #how different characters respond to you would be So different depending #like quinn and zeke especially #vampire... manipulator and vampire hunter #and alex too #vampire that doesnt really like other vampires :( #anyway I'm leaning towards human myself i think that'd work better but fjdkd #Let's Hear What The People Think

[nottragic-stilltoothsome]

Everything I found in Szarr's palace, for all your fanfiction-writting needs. I haven't found any other post like this one, so i hope i m not copying anyone. Posting it here, because editing the official wiki feels intimidating. Feel welcome to add anything I missed.

Astarion's siblings (the other spawn):

Petras - one of the two you meet in the Flophouse.

Dalyria - the other one from the two you meet in the flophouse. Her diary can be found in the "guest room". Before Cazador turned her, she was a doctor, a "Physician General to the Parliament of Baldur's Gate". She thinks vampirism is a disease and plans on curing herself of it by drinking blood of someone young and healthy - other spawn's daughter, Victoria.

Leon Onufrio - before Cazador turned him, Leon was a sorcerer. He is the one whose daughter's (Victoria's) body is found, cursed, in the room where with the Kozakuran dictionary.

Leon put a protective counter-curse on her, to discourage other spawns from attacking her. Despite his efforts, Dalyria bit her, hoping it'd cure her vampirism. Needless to say, it didn't and Victoria died @easterlingwanderer found out that if you use "speak with the dead" on the body, it turns out that it was a random urchin and Leon did get Victoria out of the city on time. After removing the curse inflicting you with necrotic demage, you can loot a letter of her body from her father instructing Victoria to read said dictionary, so she can freely move around the castle.

In the favoured spawn room, you can learn that Leon was the one usualy occupying it (along with his daughter). His diary reveals that he put extra effort to be Cazador's best hunter, so he can keep Victoria away from others and that he came up with a plan with Figaro to disguise and sneak Victoria out of the palace.

He also notes that he doesnt like the way Violet looks at Victoria and Cazador's wicked smile, when Leon asked him what his master was planning to do with his daughter.

Violet - you can find her Diary in the Dormitory of Spawn. She notes that she put garlic in Yousen bed as a prank.

Aurelia - a tiefling

Yousen - @neophytepagan noticed he is a gnome

Other:

The chamberlain of Cazador was Antwun Dufay. In his diary, which can be found under his bed in his room after a successful passive perception check, it says that he had a lover Lurianna (a werewolf, who can be found dead by walking through fake north wall of chamberlain's office, or through another fake wall in Chamberlain's private room). He knew about Cazador's Black Mass enough to fake his death in order to avoid the threat of taking Astarion's place. Unfortunately for him, it seems he confused the actual death potion and fake death potion, and really died. His lover drank the other potion, which melted her guts. The actual fake-death elixir can be found in his desk, which puts the player in 10-turn coma. He ordered the elixir from Bonecloaks', where he also ordered most of the things the palace needed to function (like bloodstain remover, candles and food for "guests").

Godey - Cazador's right hand. Astarion says that while Cazador was the master of the palace, the kennels (the room where the spawn d be tortured, when they did something Cazador didnt approve of) was the domain of Godey. Godey tortured the spawn when Cazador didnt feel like it. Cazador trusted Godey with the key to the sealed ballroom for the duration of the ritual.

Through the palace, fanatic-servants cleaning the palace: Syrin - human, Greenfern - wood half-elf, Vilhelm - human, Varderola - also human. All of them are servants, who Astarion said are devoted to Cazador and came to the palace of their own will, beggining Cazador to turn them into vampires. Vilhelm is most noteable, as you can talk to him and he asks Astarion why isn't he downstairs, that he is late and the ballroom is already locked. If pressed, he informs that Godey has a key and that the Cazador is going to punish Astarion for missing the ritual (and from his expression, he seems to quite like the thought).

Chamberlain Dufay wrote a blooddonnors ledger, instructing the Spawn to favourite the lower class as prey, as too many missing patriars may drow too much attention.

The language Cazador uses is Kozakuran, from a distant land of Kara-Tur. Astarion notes that they were strictly forbidden from learning it. From Cazador's Journal you can learn that Astarion was not an unreliable narrator when he said Cazador liked torturing him the most: Cazador paid the most attention to him in the journal.

In the favoured spawn room, there is a ledger with the list of spawns who have been favoured (its only Leon and one time Violet).

Amanita Szarr - on her 13th birthsday, invited by her Uncle Cazador. She was invited to the ballroom. She became a vampire, but was not happy about it. She rejected her family name Szarr and named herself Lady Incognita. She claims she stays in the attic and writes stories. One of the books written by her can be found on Cazador's desk.

Mrel Alkam - vampire mastress from Athkatla that Cazador wrote a letter to.

#astarion #baldur's gate 3 #bg3 #spawn #astarion's siblings #cazador szarr #cazador #fanfiction #godey #astarion x tav #resources #astarion ancunin #lore #chamberlain dufay

[meanbossart]

How did your DU drow react when he got told he had to kill his spouse? and then when he went to wake up Astarion and get tied up? I think I just wanna know how your DU drow mentally/emotionally is doing during and after that part, and when talking to Astarion afterward, I'm a sucker for hearing about those deep kinds of moments (hopefully that makes sense?) Also, how did your DU react when you met Kressa Bonedaughter and learned all about what was done to him (again, I know none of the companions really comment on literally something horrible being told such a shame, honestly) but how would you say or think that Astarion and Shadowheart might have reacted hearing that info? Again, thank you for all your art and for answering these questions! PS: (I really don't care if your answer is super long; I WILL EAT IT UP)

Sooo for the first question, I wanna preface by saying that I personally don't think their relationship was that in depth yet, at that point. Yes, DU drow enjoyed Astarion's company and relied on him in a similar way which he relied on Shadowheart. And also yes, Astarion saw DU drow as the first person who ever took him and his agency seriously - but I think feelings were still in their infancy. DU drow's mind was a mess through and through; he drank constantly to keep his urge at bay, he kept his distance from everyone most of the time, and when he did seek out comfort in either Shadowheart or Astarion (the non-sexual kind, they didn't really fuck at all), it was a kind of primal instinct and desperate longing for companionship - if you asked him if he was in love with anyone, however, he would have said no.

Similarly, while I think Astarion's act 2 confession is sincere, I also think that he's being sincere when he says that he doesn't know what you are yet. You're not really a lover, but you aren't a victim, either; what you are is a person who he would rather not have to murder eventually, and as someone who has had their empathy squeezed out throughout the course of two centuries, that's meaningful enough. He may fantasize about the best case scenario for you two - but he has no expectations that whatever this is will last. But it is nice, for the time being.

So the "murder your darling" scene, rather than a proof of love and trust, is to me the turning point where:

A) DU drow has to come to terms with the fact that he doesn't have as much control over the Urge as he thought, and B) When Astarion snaps out of his care-free, just-go-with-the-flow nature around his plan and this relationship. They both realize they bit off more than they could chew and are now caught in each other's crossfire.

Which is to say that I don't read Astarion's words of comfort to him as entirely honest - specially when you compare it to certain dialogue deliveries later in the game. I think he's still, to a degree, telling you what you need to hear so that you hold out for just a bit longer and kill Cazador. You probably can't be together forever as he idly fantasized about once or twice, when he let his mind wander - but god damn it, he needs to at least be free, and it seems like you have bloodlust to spare to make that happen.

Meanwhile, DU drow finally comes to confront the fact that he is not in control. Doesn't matter how hard he tries or how much he drinks, the urge will do to him as it will, and when it wishes. It stops being fun and it gets scary, from that moment on.

But here's who did stop it: Astarion. Where alcohol fell short and his willpower failed, Astarion stepped in.

So, more interesting than the scene itself to me, is how from that point on DU drow would have no choice but put his trust entirely on the vampire to control him. He ties him up, he keeps an eye on him, he has full spoken-word permission to kill him if necessary - he is forced to be as vulnerable at humanly possible under his hand, every night. Regardless of whether or not DU drow realizes that Astarion is doing it for his own reasons, he doesnt care, because Astarion has now become his rock and his bondage - hell, if Astarion does have a reason to keep him alive that's all the better; someone else might just slit DU drow's throat and be done with the concern altogether.

And so, it's only from that point on that DU drow truly starts to see Astarion as an equal, and even a partner. He's thinking that, if his whole life has to be like this, at least he has someone who can handle it.

Astarion, meanwhile, I believe only comes to truly consider (and wish for) DU drow's freedom after he's free from Cazador - and after he bestows that freedom upon his siblings and the other spawn. That's when he finally understands the length of DU drow's devotion to him and the value of freewill as a concept- and how he wants it for both of them, instead of being content with his own.

Not to mention... I think in Astarion's mind he was 100% not going to survive Cazador LOL so when he succeeds he's like "oh shit I guess anything is fucking possible huh. Yeah fuck it lets go fight your dad, also I've decided I want you for realsies, now."

Anyways, can you believe I thought this was gonna be a short ask. Here have a doodle I made while thinking about all this bullshit:

As for Kressa, I got an ask about that before but I can't find it now LOL to summarize; he was pissed, angered, and in a far more personal level embarrassed to have had his dirty laundry aired (AKA, victimized) in that way in front of the others - but this isn't something he would have expressed outwardly, and I think both Shadowheart and Astarion would have known better than to inquire him about it. It's not really something he would have sought out comfort for in anyone, so, I think the subject died as soon as Kressa did. In this case, their lack of commentary was completely appropriate - If they had reached out in any way (which would have been, in my opinion, completely out of character) DU drow would have shut them out with a quickness.

#I'm a little drunk so I hope this is coherent LOL #THANK YOU FOR THE ASK #ENJOY THE ELF BASED ESSAY #DU drow lore #sketch #bg3 spoilers #ask