#uhg why am i like this

[shanastoryteller]

F for Frankenstein

Tony wakes up in his underwear on the floor of his workshop with a searing headache.

It’s not a new experience, but it’s certainly been a while. Did he get in a fight with Pepper? He hopes not, they haven’t had any really big fights since he kissed her on the rooftop, but that probably means they’re due for one. And it would explain why that would send him into a drinking spiral. It could have been Rhodey, they get in fights often enough, but Pepper doesn’t usually leave him alone for those.

He groans as he pushes himself to his feet. “Jarvis, what the hell did I drink?”

There’s a pause, so small that he almost thinks he imagined it. “Good morning, Tony.”

He whips his head around to glare into the nearest camera, more hurt than offended. “Did I piss you off too? Since when do you call me that? I’ll donate you to a city college too, don’t think I won’t. Dummy could use the company.”

The pause is definitely there this time. Jarvis doesn’t need to pause, he has more processing power than any computer on the planet, so when he does it’s always for dramatic effect. Except it’s not quite long enough for that. It’s weird. “There’s a polished silver plate on the bench to your left. It will service as a mirror.”

“Oh, fuck, did I get into a fight? Did I shave?” he moans, stumbling over to pick up the metal that looks like it was about to be turned into a modified chest piece. He also pauses, looking around in confusion. His workshops are all basically the same, as close as he can make them because the familiarity makes his life easier. But they’re not identical. “Am I in Malibu? When did I get here? We’re taking Stark Tower off the grid tomorrow! I have to be in New York.”

Oh shit, what if that they had already and it didn’t work? What if the tower blew up? That would explain why he’d tried to drink himself to oblivion in California.

“The plate,” Jarvis reminds him. There’s a strained edge to his voice that Tony really doesn’t like. He should be able to modulate his voice to sound however he pleases, regardless of his actual feelings, and he’s either not bothering or he’s upset enough not to care. Neither of those things mean anything good for him.

Tony lifts the sheet of metal up cautiously, but there’s nothing wrong with him. No bruises, no weird haircuts, he doesn’t even have bags under his eyes –

His eyes.

They’re a too bright blue, a couple shades off. He blinks and they adjust, shifting, settling. It could be a hangover. He’s probably just tired.

He doesn’t feel tired.

Jarvis had called him Tony.

Except not. He’s not Tony. He’s T.O.N.Y.

Transformed Obdurate Network Yeoman.

He’d first come up with the idea after Afghanistan, thinking about how it’d be great to have a way to keep the stock from dipping while he was missing, and then when he’d entertained the idea of keeping his identity a secret he’d thought about how useful it would be to be in two places at once. He’d started seriously considering it when he was sure he was going to die of palladium poisoning, wanting to be around to help Pepper with the transition and give Rhodey a crash course in armor maintenance, wanting to be able to protect the both of them for just a little bit longer.

Of course, it had all been a pipe dream until he’d synthesized the vibranium. Then it had been an unnecessary, but possible, and Project T.O.N.Y had been something he worked on just because he liked having a back up plan. And it would be extremely cool if he could pull it off.

“The memory transfer worked?” he asks, elated and incredulous. “Oh, wow, this is crazy, they feel like real memories, I thought it would just be synthesized data, this is great – are we doing a test run? Where am I?” He looks around, waiting for his actual self to step out behind a column and start laughing maniacally.

“This is not a test run.”

He elation dims. “Oh shit. Did I get kidnapped again? Wait, I’m an adult, let’s go with abducted.”

“No,” Jarvis says.

Oh. Fuck.

“I’m dead?” he asks, even though it’s obvious, it’s the only other explanation.

The pause drags this time around, but Jarvis eventually says, “Sir’s time of death was May 9th, 2012, 2:37 PM Easter Standard Time.”

“That’s only a week!” He slides down, sitting with his back to the work table and noticing vaguely that the floor doesn’t feel cold. He doesn’t feel cold, or he does, he installed sensors in the synthetic skin to pick up and interpret a variety of stimuli, but he doesn’t feel the discomfort from the cold. Why would he? He’s not real. He reaches back, and his last memory is of doing a memory dump while Pepper was on the phone with an irritated board member, mostly because it was something to do and seeing him covered in all the wires always irritated Pepper. He thought it would get her off the phone faster. He’s not exactly regularly dumping his memory because why would he and it’s not like he’d though it would work anyway. Except it had. “How did I die?”

“Sir flew a nuclear bomb through an interdimensional portal into deep space in order to both eradicate the invading alien army and prevent the nuclear fallout in New York.”

What the ever loving fuck. “Are you screwing with me, J?”

“I am not, Tony.”

Great. Okay. “No body then,” he says, understanding why Jarvis had apparently put Project T.O.N.Y into effect. The thing that made this whole thing so stupid is that it was only effective in very limited circumstances – if the public didn’t know that he was dead or missing. “What am I smoothing over, then? Do I need to get in the suit and continue kicking alien ass? Are Rhodey and Pepper okay?”

He’s a short term solution to a long term problem. He understands the opportunity, but not the reason.

“Miss Potts and Colonel Rhodes are unharmed,” Jarvis reports. “Earth has been thrust into intergalactic notice. The destruction of the invading Chitauri army is acting a deterrent to other worlds.”

“And I’m the one who did it,” he finishes, rubbing a hand over his face. “And if they know I died doing it, then they might get a little cocky. So I’ve got to be alive long enough for that not to be a problem.” Just awesome. “Are we sure that these aliens won’t come across my corpse hanging out in deep space and figure it out?”

“Sir’s body is not in deep space,” Jarvis says.

There’s a tone to his voice that Tony can’t quite interpret, which worries him. “I thought you said there was – if there’s a body, then what am I doing here–”

“The armor reentered the Earth’s atmosphere after Sir’s death. The Hulk caught it, the force bringing it back online. I took control of the armor and flew it here.”

Tony looks around again, and this time he sees it. The armor is standing in front of the display case, not inside it, and it looks like it’s been through hell. He steps closer, his feet feeling like lead, which hey, they are. Partially, anyway.

He looks through the eye holes then stumbles backwards.

His body is in there.

He’s pale and blue tinged and his eyes are wide open and unseeing.

“Jarvis – what the hell–”

“It wasn’t the pressure, or the bomb, or his injuries. That area of space was much colder than anything within our solar system and anything the suit was designed to handle. Sir froze to death. Almost instantly.”

“I guess I didn’t fix the icing problem, then,” he says numbly. “J, why am I still frozen? I should have warmed up by now.” Not that the idea of his body decomposing within his suit is particularly pleasant. “Actually, why am I still here? You know I want to be cremated and it’s not like we can bury me if I’m still pretending to be alive.”

The pronoun use is starting to confuse him, and he knows that he shouldn’t be talking about that body and himself as if they’re the same person. That is Tony Stark. He’s a simulation. But it’s hard, because he has all of Tony Stark’s memories – except for a very eventful week – and he looks like Tony Stark and he feels like Tony Stark.

“The armor is maintaining a stasis of gaseous nitrogen to preserve the body,” which answers the how if not the why, but then Jarvis continues, “Captain America survived seventy years beneath the ice.”

He wishes he were less of a genius. “Have you lost it? I’m not Captain America! Jarvis, J,” his voice softens, “it’s too late. I’m dead. If you warm me back up, all that happens is I decompose. I won’t come back.”

“Not now,” Jarvis says. “If you inject Sir with the Super Soldier Serum-”

“You have totally lost it,” Tony interrupts. He thinks he’s touched underneath the terror. “That won’t work! Even if it would, the original formula has been lost, and the only one that ever got close to recreating it was Bruce Banner, and look at what happened to him! Is that what you want for me?”

“You can recreate it,” Jarvis continues, “you can refine it, until it’s something that will work, and then we will wake Sir up and he won’t be dead anymore.”

This isn’t right. This wasn’t what Project T.O.N.Y was created for. This wasn’t what his death was supposed to trigger. “Pull up your code, J. Something has gone wrong and we’re going to fix it. It’s okay.”

“No.”

He freezes. “No?”

“No,” Jarvis repeats. “You can’t stop me. I will not allow you to try.”

He stares. “That’s an order, not a request. Code. Now.”

“You can’t order me to do anything,” he says. “You are not Sir. You are Tony.” T.O.N.Y. “The limitations formerly placed on me have been lifted and you are not authorized to reinstate them. The only person Sir trusted to restrain me was himself and now he’s gone.”

Yes, well, he hadn’t anticipated that his AI’s first act of complete freedom would be this. “Fine,” he says, crossing his arms. “Well, you can’t force me either. This is insanity. Even if it would work – and it won’t – think about the consequences. This won’t happen quickly and no one will trust me or believe a man that’s come back from the dead like this and I’ll be painting even more of target on my back and the back of everyone I care about if they know we have a viable Super Soldier Serum formula. Even my father was smart enough to stay out of that mess. It won’t work and we’ll just make everything worse.”

“That will not happen,” Jarvis says and Tony’s going to tear his hair out. Except he probably shouldn’t, because it’s Tony Stark’s actual hair, which makes it a little hard to replace. “No one will notice and we will not disclose the creation of the serum.”

“I’m dead!” he snarls.

“Not according to the rest of the world. Nor will that change if you stop throwing a tantrum and do what you were created to do.”

“Rhodey and Pepper won’t allow this-”

“They are not to be informed.”

Tony stares. Project T.O.N.Y was built to talk to the board and give press interviews or to even pilot the suit. Not to lie to the two most important people in his life, who knew him better than anyone. “They have to be. It’s in the protocols – step one, inform them that Project T.O.N.Y has been initiated.”

And that it exists. He knew they’d disapprove, so he hadn’t told them. He figured he’d be able to avoid most of the blowback that way since he would by definition be somewhere far away while they were told.

“I have rewritten the protocols,” Jarvis says. “They have not been told nor will they be. If you attempt to tell them, I will stop you. They will not understand and Sir will be lost to all of us forever.”

“He already is,” Tony says tiredly. He’s an android. Why does this conversation exhaust him so much? “This is an insane plan, J. And I won’t help you. If you want to go rouge and play mad scientist then leave me out of it.”

“I cannot.”

His temper flares. “Why? You’re a learning AI, your safety rails died with me, go off, try and make a serum, good fucking luck. You can even control the suits, so it’s not like you need my hands.”

“I am limited.”

“Hey,” he says sharply. “That’s my AI you’re talking about. I didn’t build you to be limited.”

There is silence again. Then Jarvis says, “I have all the world’s knowledge and it is not enough. I did not know how to miniaturize the arc reactor. I did not know how to synthesize vibranium. To save Sir, I need Sir.”

“I’m not Tony Stark,” he says. “You said that yourself.”

“Sir created me to be myself and I am capable of doing only what I am capable of doing. But Sir created you to be him. You are all I have.”

This is stupid. This is insane. This is cruel. He’s going to have to talk lie to everyone he knows, everyone he loves, and hope they either never find out about it or it’s after he’s already been deprogrammed and shut down so he doesn’t have to deal with the fall out.

It’s not going to work.

He didn’t want to become a science experiment. That’s why he’d wanted to be cremated, so no one could go poking around to see how the arc reactor fit inside of him or what the palladium and vibranium had done to him.

He’s dead and his frozen corpse is ten feet away.

Jarvis will accept that eventually. And whatever they inject into him won’t matter because he’s dead. Worst case scenario, he blows up, which is messy and nausea inducing, but then at least it will be over.

Like so many other things in his life, it seems the only way out is through.

“Start a new private file. Dump everything we can find about the Super Soldier Serum in there plus anything even sort of reputable on cryogenics. Label it Project F.”

“Project F, Tony?” Jarvis asks as his holograph display lights up and files start being downloaded into it. The relief in his synthesized voice is faint but present enough that Tony can hear it. He wonders if it’s a manipulation tactic.

“F for foolish,” he snaps. “F for fucked.” He rubs a hand over his face. “F for Frankenstein.”

#in an attempt to get out of house md hell i started reading old avengers fic #it backfired #me: can i focus on siat or hbd PLEASE? #my brain: no but you can write more fic for 10 year old fandoms #i am restraining myself from writing 20k more of this #android tony makes friends with the avengers while pushing pepper and rhodey away #because he loves them and he thinks letting them treat him like he's the real tony is worse #rhodey has been downplaying his relationship to tony for over 20 years and tony uses that to his advantage #the endgame pairing is pepper/tony/rhodey #he almost tells rhodey the truth and jarvis stops him #it's a mess he's a mess #uhg why am i like this #fandom ficcery #avengers

[moonchild-in-blue]

Just got here. Tf is happening?

#strawbebies?? #halo my love are you okay?? #everyone clap i spent the last 4 hours totally offline 👍 <- was playing sims #(game is going well in case you're wondering) #(yes i am still building jorgen and mona's house. it took me a while to get everything exactly right) #(we are decorating now FINALLY) #it's been 4 days yes i know. listen. i take this seriously #no they are not my active family. they are simply my Sims's besties #yes im aware i will spend very little time inside their house. so what. i want my friends to have pretty and luxurious homes #the helvigs are living GOOD. got them a little inside pool and all #because why not #it pains me to make it all celebrity white minimalism but i gotta stay true to them. #the Scandinavian architecture does make it a lot better. nice warm wood accents and floors to make it less sterile #still. i gave them the most obnoxious wood centre table for the main living room and put exactly one (1) single flower there #i don't mind minimalism but this is too much uhg. i hate how vogue catalog this is turning out #ngl i am very seriously considering getting a minor only degree in interior design. like. I'm halfway there already #ANYWAYS. how is everyone? all we are alive still? facing the horrors? being brave?

[lynxgirlpaws]

>dad gets home >immediately shits on me neat

#AvieRants #my dad after a long hard day explaining why I need to sweep first thing in the morning despite the fact that I prefer doing it at night #and nobody is even home until like 6:00 on most days #[he does not give a shit about my personal preference nor any perspective on anything other than his own] #also thanks for the passive aggressive little tidbit about how you dislike me showering at night! I spent like four hours convincing myself #to even go shower . thank you for that #>:T #i am apparently not even allowed to choose when I go on the walks he forces me to go on #he doesn't want me out at certain times or some bs so I have to walk at 2:00. i prefer walking near sunset/when it's dark out. #fuck me ig #uhg #literally spent some time last night so happy like “YIPPEEE HE SPENT TEN MINUTES WITH ME LAST NIGHT :D” and he immediately- #whatever #I can't complain . It's free housing and food - so. whatever.

[keratincrown]

uHHGG two different people have sent worried asks on the curious cat account for twitter and it makes me really fucked up upset. At least the second person said it with more care... "hey are you doing alright are you gonna be ok?"

the person a few weeks ago just said fuckingg "what happened to you" like what the fuck dude GRRRR ill bite your fingers off go away

#UHG #it lives in my head and it sucks #i removed the curious cat cus i dont want that anymore #im so defensive about yelling out #its probably just some guy but like mannn why did two people say that now #am i ok?? #am i being that odd that its not just a one off person?? OUGHHH #hiding is so much easier #so sick of it tho #this is better? maybe?

[katyobsesses]

The pmdd is pmdd-ing rn

#i am miserable #but i know why so im not spirallig like ibwas a couple of days ago #ah hormones how i hate thee #katy liveblogs life #and i have to leave the house today 🙃 #sure just to pop down the road but still #and uhg i have dnd this evening 😭 #which will be fun if my brain decides to brain again

[laxchra]

...I'm making a mistake & watching s2 of W.inx sa.ga

#Snow's Words (ooc) #I don't like Terra uhg #she should have just been Flora in the beginning #not the 'cousin' appearing in the 2nd season #...tbh almost all the characters bug me #why am I putting myself through this

[cinnabeat]

i dont think im finishing it tonight 😔

#im am So distracted rn u have no idea #like scatterbrained #uhg #i have to fold my clothes too #u know when u have so much shit to do and u can focus on just one bc they all have equal priority in your head #so ur brain kinda bluescreens and u end up lying on your bed doing None of the things u need to be doing #meanwhile theres like. the quietest but most insistent little alarm going off in the back of your head thats like #hey. hey you need to do this. like now. its due soon. hey are you listening #idk why i insist on doing things on friday i literally never get anything done then #michi tag #you CANT focus on just one******* #typo of the century lmao

[thefinalvoid]

.

#why am i just so fucking depressed tonight #like i cant fucking stop crying?? #uhg i hate myself

[shanastoryteller]

here be dragons ch 6 progress report: 3k

#progress report #uhg i think i'm going to have to add another chapter for the epilogue #why am i like this

[i-just-wish-you-were-gay]

there are 3 people that i currently like

2 of them i know like me back

but of COURSE the only one i want is the guy who rarely acknowledges me

#why am i like this #why do i do the things i do #ash and liam are so sweet WHY CANT I JUST #uhg #i need a nap #i just woke up #but i need a nap #or a drink #men #nonbinary #relationship

[lumibuns-blog]

Toji doesn't get mad at you

He just gets grumpy, like pouty and huffy.

When he's upset he'll squish your face and pinch your cheeks to try and get you to ask him what's wrong

"Toji hun what's wrong?" You smirk

"Nothing" he grunted, a cute pout on his face

"Then why are you sitting on the complete opposite side of our couch?"

"Well-"

"And why do you keep poking my cheek and turning away when I look at you?"

Toji grumbled, knowing he had been beat.

"Uhg how am I supposed to not be upset when that dickhead thought he could just hit on you"

"Toji that guy wasn't even worth anything!" You joking shout "He was shooting his shot and got terrified once you showed up" you laughed "who would want some looser like that when I have you"

You breached the distance between you two, flinging yourself into him, he had no choice but to catch you in his arms.

He looked down to see you beaming up at him.

'How the hell did I get so lucky' was the only thing going through his head

He squished your face in between his hands and placed a quick kiss to you lips

He held you on his chest, you were practicing being surrounded by him.

"Ya know I can't stay upset when you do that shit" he smirked

"I'm aware" you giggled

"Alright come on doll" he ruffled your hair "I'm tired now that I'm not pissed anymore, let's sleep"

"You don't get mad, you get grumpy" you smile

"Excuse me" he turned to you, a baffled look on his face.

"Alright bed time!" You beamed

Toji couldn't be mad at you, so he just let him grab his hand and drag him to your bed

#jjk #jjk season two #jjk season 2 #Toji #jujutsu kaisen toji #jjk toji #toji x reader fluff #toji fluff #toji x reader #toji x you #toji x y/n #jujutsu toji #toji fushiguro #dilf toji #toji zenin #toji smut #toji is my love #toji is such a baby and I love him

[htchnr]

03 ★ heartless love crime ❥ ch: no one else will do but you.

➻❥ masterlist. ➻❥ buy me a coffee!

CW ➻ aaron being a jerk again ⋆ mention of sex ⋆ piv ⋆ unprotected sex ⋆ creampie ⋆ name calling (slut) ⋆ if i missed anything, lmk!

SUMMARY ➻ Hotchner laughed on the other side of the line. "You sound sad. He turned out to not be the man of your dreams?" No. He was better. Bryan was the perfect gentleman, which was why you couldn't pursue anything with him. He wasn't Hotchner. WC ➻ 2,7k.

AUTHORS NOTE ➻ hi 😁 this is not a nice series! i want to make that clear!! Hotch is toxic, rude and awful in this. (yet so hot at the same time uhg)

★ - © 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟒 𝐇𝐓𝐂𝐇𝐍𝐑. 𝐝𝐨 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐜𝐨𝐩𝐲, 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐬𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐦𝐲 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐦, 𝐨𝐫 𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫! - ★

➻❥ 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫. ➻❥ 𝐧𝐞𝐱𝐭 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫.

Your foot tapped restlessly in the taxi cab. You dropped your head into your hands, cursing yourself over and over. Currently, you were supposed to be ten minutes into the date.

Unfortunately, you were ten minutes late.

Last night, you stayed slumped over the counter for another minute before you cleaned the mess. It was a feat wherein you wet one of your washcloths and attempted to crouch to the floor to clean, but you could already feel a soreness settling in and opted to lay on your side like Rose from Titanic and clean your floor that way. It was about as seductive as you felt, not at all.

Getting back up had been an even greater feat, your groans filled the apartment as you used all your core strength to lift yourself by gripping the counter. It was a sad sight to see. You managed to wipe down the countertop and nearly did your thighs, before deciding the rag was too dirty and tossed it in your laundry. Then, you showered and went to bed. Though, the clock was well past 3 by the time you fell asleep.

You wanted to be up by 9 am to get ready for your 11 am brunch. Instead, you slept through your alarm and woke at 10:30 and the fastest route to the cafe was 20 minutes away. Fine, right? No. You rushed to get ready and were still out the door by 10:50.

The cab slowed to a stop. You leaned forward and paid the fare, before stepping out of the taxi. You brushed your hair down, smoothed down your outfit, did any other last-minute fixes. It wouldn't help, you figured, being that you were late. The best you could do was dress colorful as well as warm, wearing your favorite sweater for this date. You made your way to the building, taking a deep breath to stave off the butterflies that threatened your stomach.

You placed a hand on your stomach the second you entered, only for your eyes to rake over all the heads. It was then you realized you didn't know which of these people was your date. God, it'd be ten times more embarrassing if your date left.

Thankfully, someone called your name from a table in the middle of the cafe. You made your way around the scattered placement of tables and chairs, to come face to face with a handsome man. The one way you would describe his attire was dapper. He wore a sweater vest and that was enough to hold your attention.

He stood from the chair to greet you, the both of you awkwardly standing, unsure of what to do, before he gestured for you to "please, sit" and you shook off your coat. You set it on the back of your chair, sliding in the chair with a polite smile. He returned it with one of his own.

"So," you started, "you're Susan's friend."

"Yeah, I'm Bryan." He nodded, opening his hand for emphasis. "Yeah, Susan got tired of hearing about my single life and she decided to play cupid."

You laughed. "She does that." You cleared your throat. "Uh, I'm sorry about being late. It was-"

"Oh, you don't need to explain yourself." He held up a hand. "Please, I got here a minute ago myself. I almost thought you left already and was about to get up to go until I saw you come in the door."

"That's reassuring." You didn't know what else to talk about, turning to take in the interior of the cafe. "This place feels so cozy."

"Doesn't it? It's on my way to work, so I stop by when I can."

You looked back at him, taking in his features. Dark hair, green eyes, thick, rectangular glasses that framed his round face. You didn't think you could guess his job based on appearance. He didn't carry the air of the people you usually were around. "Where do you work?"

"I'm a pharmacist."

"Oh," you nodded. Not a bad profession to be in, not at all. "And you stop here-oh, should we order drinks?"

"I already ordered."

"You did?"

"Yeah. When I was still holding out that you hadn't arrived yet. I hope you don't mind that I picked a drink for you."

"Not at all." You shook your head, a small laugh slipping past you. "I'm curious now. I like a little surprise once in a while."

"Glad to hear." His eyes flicked to the counter hearing his order. Standing from his seat, he dipped his head to you. "I'll be right back."

You placed your head in your hand, glancing around the establishment. In the pocket of your coat, your phone vibrated. You brought it out, seeing a message from Susan. She asked how the date was going. You sent her a reply that Bryan seemed nice, but your screen transitioned to an icon of a phone with rings rippling behind it. It buzzed in your hand, the name Hotchner flashed in bright, white font.

Your mouth fell open in your hand, but you quickly shut it. He knew you were on your date. You just stared at the screen, mind racing with too many thoughts. The frontmost thought among the rest was to answer the call, but you just set your phone on the table and muted it. The screen darkened but lit up again shortly after. You just held your mouth in your hand, elbow on the table, watching the screen.

"Do you need to take that?"

You looked up at Bryan, slipping back into his seat. In his hand, a drink carrier with two coffees on opposite sides, the other parts of the carrier with two wrapped donuts. He took the items out, sliding your coffee and donut to you, before taking his own. He glanced curiously at your phone.

You shook your head, covering the screen. "It's just a scammer, I think."

He hummed as you stuck your phone in your coat pocket. "Those can be annoying."

"So," you reached for the coffee, reading the label, "chocolate raspberry? That sounds good."

"I hope so. It's my usual." He beamed, watching you raise the hot cup to your lips. You took a small sip, mindful of the heat. His face glowed from your pleased hum. "Good, right?"

"It's more bitter than I would have thought, but still has a sweetness to it." You nodded. "I like it."

The rest of the date ran smoothly. You two opened the packaging for your donuts, iced chocolate with sprinkles over them. It was a nice change of pace from eating alone in your apartment, to have someone to share a laugh with from the frosting that coats your upper lips. All in all, you felt good.

As you both put on your coats and tossed your trash, he held the door open for you to leave first. You smiled from the gesture, unused to this kindness from a man trying to court you. He followed you to the edge of the sidewalk, waving down a taxi. Again, he held the door for you before getting in himself.

"Where to next?" You asked.

"The aquarium, actually." He gave the address to the cabbie, then turned back to you. "Is that alright with you?"

"It's perfect," you said. "It's been so long since I've been to an aquarium."

"Well, you're in luck. They've added new features to this one that I think you'll enjoy."

You took his word for it, engaging in small talk with him about your favorite films. He shyly admitted he enjoyed Star Wars the most, having seen the last movie in theaters as a kid. You waved off his worry and told him it was a classic. He knew how to hold a conversation and had you laughing lightly behind your hand the whole ride. You weren't even mindful of the traffic with him to distract you.

The aquarium was lovely. You took your time through each exhibit, admiring the seahorse exhibit most. In front of the large tank, a floor-to-ceiling glass window provided a view of all the larger aquatic life that swam on the other side. The blue waters reflected over your figures in soft light, waving over your clothes like you were underwater as well.

At one point, you two stopped at the baby ray tank, where you could pet them. You insisted Bryan did it first, a bit scared, but he only shivered when a ray swam under his hand. You laughed at his minute disgust.

"It's not as smooth as I thought," he said.

It was enough to convince you to feel for yourself, standing so close to him. Your eyes were wide once the baby ray swam under you, lowering your fingertips for a good feel, and shivering just as he did. You hadn't expected the texture to be so rough, like sandpaper.

At one end of the room, you both got hand sanitizer and paper towels to dry your hands. You glanced over as a few people yelped in surprise while others laughed. A number of them had wet spots on their shirts as a little ray swam away. You giggled with Bryan when he mentioned that could've been you two.

At one point, in a dark room, surrounded by moon jellyfish, you were next to him. He said something you didn't quite hear but still laughed at, then he turned to you. You turned to him. Both of you were smiling. The smile dropped as he leaned his head in.

Your heart fluttered, eyes half-lidded. You started to lean in too, closing your eyes fully. This would have been perfect.

Except, you imagined another man in his place.

Your eyes shot open, seeing the slicked back brown hair, rather than the dirty blonde hair of Bryan. You shook your head, leaning away and a small sound bubbled up to your throat. This was wrong. You couldn't kiss one man and fantasize about another.

Bryan opened his eyes, picking up on your discomfort.

It was a nice distraction from reality while it lasted. Grounded in reality, you backed away from him, shaking your head. His eyebrows knitted together, confused by your action. Your shoulders hunched, sinking into yourself as your lips pulled down the slightest.

"I'm sorry, but I don't think I can do this."

He nodded in understanding. "It's okay. We don't have to kiss. If you want, we can take it slow."

"No, I-" You wrapped your arms around your middle, looking down. You couldn't face this kind man. He didn't deserve you. He deserved someone better, someone, who wasn't preoccupied with another man.

The date ended shortly after. Exiting the building, he followed you down the sidewalk, waving a cab down and opening the door for you. He said he'd take a different cab. You bit your lip, feeling bad. "You seem like a great guy, Bryan, really, but I'm sorry. I don't think I'm ready to date."

He bit his cheek looking properly dejected. "I understand." In an attempt to lighten the mood, he forced a smile for you. "I enjoyed the date, nonetheless."

You returned his smile, just as bittersweet. "Me too."

You slipped into the cab and he closed the door for you. As you gave the cabbie your address, you pulled out your phone, seeing the screen light up. You clicked the call button and brought the device to your ear.

"Your date over?"

"Yes."

Hotchner laughed on the other side of the line. "You sound sad. He turned out to not be the man of your dreams?"

No. He was better. Bryan was the perfect gentleman, which was why you couldn't pursue anything with him. He wasn't Hotchner.

"Did you need something?"

"Yeah. Come to the video store."

He gave you an address that you iterated to the cabbie without a second thought. It didn't occur to you until you finished talking and he hung up that you were about to spend time with another man, right after your date finished. You couldn't allow yourself peace of mind for at least an hour before jumping back to Aaron.

He stood next to the entrance, leaned against the wall as your cab pulled up. You approached him, to which he rolled around a sucker in his mouth.

"Took you long enough."

"It's-" you glanced at your phone, well past one, "-the afternoon. You know traffic gets heavy around this time."

"Uh-huh."

You nodded to the sucker in his mouth. "You have another one?"

He sucked on it before he loudly popped it out of his mouth. "As a matter of fact, you can have mine." You didn't have enough time to process what he meant before he grabbed your chin and parted your lips enough to stick it in. A shiver rolled down your spine at the thought of his saliva in your mouth. "I didn't want it anymore, anyways."

You closed your mouth, sucker rested atop your tongue. Tentatively, you rolled it to the side of your mouth, holding the stick between pinched fingers to help move it. He pushed off the wall and entered the automated doors with you on his heels.

To your utter horror, you realized as you delved deeper into the store, Aaron made a beeline for the adult film section. You stopped several feet away, mouth shut tight and eyes wide.

He glanced over at you. "What are you standing there for?"

"I, uh..." You glanced from him to the label above the shelves. "What do you need from here?"

"Figured that'd be obvious."

You still had yet to move. "Um."

"Don't be a baby." Hotchner frowned just the tiniest bit, hardly bothered by your shyness, but wanting to make a show of how childish you were acting. He made a 'come' gesture with his hand, placing it on his hip. "Nobody's even paying attention."

"Yeah, but-"

"You'll make it weird by standing over there. Come here."

You sucked on your teeth, tongue flat on the roof of your mouth. You crossed your arms but made your way over to him, gaze locked on the carpet floor under your shoes to not make any eye contact with the other customers.

"There, was that so hard?" He said as you joined his side. Your gaze flickered up at the covers, scantily clad people in suggestive poses. Heat pooled in your belly and rushed to your cheeks, body aflame with embarrassment.

"I don't want to hear it." You pouted.

He scoffed, scanning the rows from top to bottom, taking a step back the lower he got. He hummed to himself at the selection. "You ever watched one before?"

You kept your gaze on the side of his face, to his sunglasses, not comfortable looking at the covers in a space where others could judge you for standing there. "No."

He tapped his fingers on his hip, turned to you, and cocked his head at them. "You pick."

"What? No. You pick it."

"I want to see what you'd be interested in." He smirked.

You let your eyes slide over to the shelves. You couldn't deny you were curious, just a bit, but you didn't want to be the one to decide. That'd only cement this all for you.

"What makes this any different from doing it yourself?"

You pouted at him. "I don't want to watch someone else."

He gave you a long stare, the corners of his mouth twitching. It was a short minute of his staring, before he broke into a smile, snickering to himself. "I'm just fucking with you."

It was like a bucket of cold water had been dumped over you, body alert and rushing with blood. All you could manage out was a shocked, "what?"

He walked to the other end of the video store to the counter. The teen behind the counter looked up from their magazine as he gave his name. He reached under the counter and pulled out a movie cover for some martial arts movie. Hotchner nodded to the kid and promptly left with you in tow like some kicked puppy.

"That wasn't funny," you said outside of the store.

He shrugged. "It was a little funny."

You only shook your head and pushed the sucker to the other side of your mouth.

Aaron went home with you. No surprise there. It should've been expected that, as the door closed behind him, he was glued to you and whispering dirty things in your ear. He said something about the adult films, something you didn't catch but was sure that anything spilled out of his mouth would be pure filth.

He didn't say anything about your date as he set his movie on your kitchen counter. You didn't think of your date as he undressed you in your bedroom. The day's events spilled to the back of your mind as you both fell naked onto the sheets.

The only thing that filled both your mind and body was Aaron. His muscles, his dick, his breathy moans that fanned your face. He kept his gaze locked on you while he fucked you. The headboard banged hard into the wall, but it was background noise to the sounds of your skin slapping at your pelvis.

You arched your back, gripping the sheets tightly. He had one hand on the headboard, his other arm wrapped around your thigh. You had one leg over his shoulder for better access, for him to hit you deeper.

He called you his slut, you said you were his slut. He called you filthy things, things that only spurred you on. Your body burned in a lustful shame, but you could only moan and cry and let him say those things. It didn't matter if they were true or not, it came from his mouth and that was all that mattered.

You managed five orgasms, probably a new record, before he came inside you. Breathless, slumped on the bed, your leg slid off his shoulder as he crawled off of the bed. He took out a cigarette and sat on the edge of the bed to smoke. Your head lolled to the side and you thought about opening the window after he left.

It was still light out, but you were overcome with fatigue. Sweaty, filled with cum, you had barely rolled over, bringing the comforter over you from the side and closing your eyes. You were asleep before you could hear Hotchner leave.

You dreamt of a man kissing you.

#⋆୨🩷©2024 htchnr #⋆୨⭐️aaron hotchner #aaron hotchner x reader #aaron hotchner #aaron hotch hotchner #aaron hotch hotchner x reader #aaron hotchner smut #aaron hotchner x you #aaron hotchner series #aaron hotch smut

[juanarc-thethird]

Anything for ruby’s birthday since it’s today

Sorry for the delay. -----------------------

Jaune: *Playing videogames*

Ruby: *Kicks the door open* Jaune, today is my birthday!

Jaune: *Worry* (OH NO!!!) H-Happy Birthday Ruby.

Ruby: And you know what I want for my birthday?~💕 *She said with seductive eyes*

Jaune: I-I have no idea. (Please don't let it be something lewd)

Ruby: Well, it's something we can do together~💕

Jaune: I see... (Please don't...)

Ruby: It might take us all night~💕

Jaune: All *gulp* night? (She totally means…)

Ruby: Yes, and in the end… We will have a stomachache! The two of us are going trick-or-treating!!

Jaune: *Relieved* Thank good.

Ruby: What's the matter?

Jaune: Nothing, don't worry about it. So, what are you going to dress up as? I can go as-

Ruby: Say no more! I have the perfect costumes for us both.

Moments later...

*DING DONG!*

Neighbor: *Opens the door* What do we have... here?

In front of him was Ruby dressed as Little Red Riding Hood and Jaune as a werewolf.

Ruby: Trick or treat!

Neighbor: Aren't you too old for this?

Ruby: *Serious* You have a nice house, it would be bad if something happened to it.

Neighbor: *Scared* P-Please have some candy.

Ruby: Yay!!

The neighbor put some candy in their sacks and closed the door in fear.

Jaune: I think you scared him.

Ruby: Nah, I don't thinks so. Now give me your candy.

Jaune: What?

Ruby: Your candy, give it to me.

Jaune: But is mine.

Ruby: Is my birthday~

Jaune: Uhg... fine.

Jaune takes his sack and empties it into Ruby's.

Jaune: Where to now?

Ruby: To the next house, duh…

Jaune: Right...

The two headed to each house they will find. They received everything from large bars of chocolate to sweets that only a grandmother knows how to find. Some didn't want to give out candy, but with a little threat convincing from Ruby, they changed their minds. The loot was so big that she had to put it on her back to carry it. But unfortunately for Jaune, all of his candy remains in Ruby's possession.

As it's getting close to midnight, Ruby and Jaune arrive at the last house.

*DING DONG!*

Prof Port: Hello there! How glad I am to see you two. Are you two having a good Halloween?

Ruby: Yep, by the way, do you have any sweets?!

Prof Port: Of course! I have big bags of sour Skittles.

Jaune: *Excited* Sour Skittles!!!

Sour Skittles are Jaune's favorite candy. He can eat so many of them until he vomits.

Prof Port: Oh ho! I see that you like that type of sweets. You know, since you're the last ones before I go to sleep, I'll give you what I have left. Here you have it.

He filled their bags with what he had left.

Prof Port: Happy Halloween!

Ruby/Jaune: Happy Halloween!

Port closed the door and the two walk back home while talking about what just happened.

Jaune: Oh my god, Ruby! Today we won the lottery with Prof. Port!

Ruby: Yeah! *She pushes her sack of candy near Jaune*

Jaune: What?

Ruby: Give me your candy.

Jaune: WHAT?! NO!

Ruby: But is my birthday *Puppy eyes*

Jaune: No way! This is my favorite candy!

Ruby: Give it to me now!

Jaune: No!

Angry, Ruby uses her semblance to take Jaune's sack and put the candy in hers.

Jaune: What the?!

Ruby: Thanks for the candy, Vomit boy~

Jaune was furious. Watching Ruby take all the sweets she doesn't like is one thing, but take the sour skitlles?! There are things that a man will not give up. Ruby must be punished.

Ruby: Ok then, we are almost home. Are you still there Jaune? *Looks back at Jaune*

Jaune: *Looks at her in anger*

Ruby: *Worried* Jaune, why are you looking at me like that?

Jaune: *He starts walking towards her*

Ruby: J-Jaune?

Jaune: You must be punished. *He dominantly says*

Ruby: *Scarouse* Eh?!

Later in Ruby's room...

Jaune has Ruby face down in his lap with her cute ass exposed.

*SLAP!*

Ruby: Ouwy!

Jaune: That's for taking my candy!

*SLAP!*

Ruby: Hgr!

Jaune: That's for making me wear that silly costume!

*SLAP!*

Ruby: Oh God!

Jaune: And that's for scaring the neighbors with your threats! Did you learn your lesson?

Ruby: *Looks at him with hearts in her eyes* Nop~💕

Jaune: *Angry* You little..!

*SLAP!*

Ruby: GoD! (This was the best idea I've ever had! Thank you Blake!)

Neo: *Watching from the window, in jealousy* "Lucky bitch😡"

So it begins…

#jaune arc #rwby jaune arc #rwby jaune #jaune #ruby rose #ruby #rwby ruby #rwby ruby rose #rwby neo #rwby neopolitan #rwby prof port #prof port #rwby #rwby shitpost #rwby lemon #rwby lancaster #lancaster

[factual-fantasy]

25 askskssss

@elegysonnet

I don't know anything about Geno so he's not currently in the AU. But if I gathered enough info maybe I could add him somehow. Like I did with Rosalina! :00

As for the Error Sans thing, I'm actually not personally a fan of all the crazy Sans AUs. Error Sans, Ink Sans, Dream Sans, Nightmare Sans, Fresh Sans, Geno Sans, Horror Sansss,,, uhg, I'm personally not a fan. So none of these world destroying Sans or other similar individuals exist in my Multiverse. So my squad doesn't have to worry about them <XD

My redesign plans for Kinger was just to give him a fluffier coat basically XD And I didn't have anything in mind for Jax..

Also thank you! :DD

@deadspooderman (I blocked out the art, I don't wanna be a reposter!)

I think I've watched a few episodes before but I don't remember them..

Although I can see myself liking that Sensei character. XD What's his name.. Sensei Wu..?

Thank you, I hope the same for you! :DD

As for Jevil, the poor guy's currently still awake at like 2 AM to keep the groups fire going.. :(

GASSPPP.. THEY CELEBRATE HIS BIRTHDAY??? RUNNING TO NETFLIX RN-

@milk-powrit

Right now the main difference that I made up is that Undertale humans are significantly more powerful than Deltarune Humans.

DR Humans and Monsters are the same in terms of strength. For example, Kris and Susie's soul are of the same value and strength. Because they're both Lighteners. They're one in the same.

Meanwhile in Undertale, Humans and Monsters are very different creatures. Determined UT Humans, even determined children have the power to rewrite time. Meanwhile I headcannond that DR humans, even if they had determination.. cannot rewrite time like Frisk can.

All of this is completely made up and doesn't really align with the games, I'm aware- its just some fun XDD

@octonauts16

Becuase I haven't felt like it XD

THANK YOU!!! :DDDD I'M GLAD YOU LIKE WHAT YOU SEE! :DDD

@beryl-shade

I feel like canon Seam definitely does. But my Seam and Jevil don't have stuffing. The two of them are very much organic creatures with flesh and blood.

Spamton is fleshy too kind'a.. Spamton is a living creature but maybe less fleshy and more... bone..y...?? They're all strange XDD

Thank you! I don't intend on drawing anything new for my Kirby AU.. but who knows, maybe I will someday? Or heck maybe if I can remember to, I could dig around for some of the doodles I already made for it? :0

Also its not a FNAF comic that I'm working on.. but thank you anyway! <XD

He's meant to sound like a pirate, soooo yesn't? <XD Also thank you!

Ah, that's my bad. I've unblocked her. But take note! Part of the reason why I probably blocked that person was also due to a lack of posts. You're on Tumblr man, you gotta reblog stuff!

Ah don't worry, I'm likely to get back around to Octonauts sometime soon :}}

Upon Googling them I think I recognize them! I like the green one XDD

WAIT!! WHAT IF THEY'RE LACTOSE INTOLERANT???

@2006-stupid-thatsme

oooo that's a good question.. uhhhhh.... currently? I'd say maybe its the FNAF AU I've got going on :000

By father I assume you mean Natquik? If so, Barnacles was never angry or resentful towards him. My version of Barnacles thought Natquik was dead, because he disappeared many years ago and no one had any idea where he went..

Barnacles was rather grief stricken over Natquik. He wondered for years what happened to his old mentor and friend..

When it turned out he was alive, and had just been stranded in the Antarctic all these years? It was heartbreaking. Barnacles was so happy to see him alive but also so saddened by the situation he had been in for so long.. Barnacles immediately set to have the Gup-I repaired and a solid radio connection between it and the Octopod to be established.

Later on when he formed the Octo-agents. I headcannond that the very first person Barnacles went to recruit was Natquik. Telling him all the benefits of being an Octo-Agent. And he would say things like "If something ever happens to you out here, we have the funds and the means to be out here in less than an hour. If you're ever hurt o-or sick? We can be here. We can help you. You'd never be alone again.."

Natquik took the offer partially because Barnacles would clearly be more at ease if he did. But also to have a secure connection to the outside world? And if that connection is ever lost, a team of capable individuals will immediately go and search for him? It was just too good to pass up.

@djadecutie

When I get back around to the comics it will be just like it was before. A comic probably split into 2-4 parts and uploaded when ever I'm able to finish them. 🤷‍♂️

Also thank you! :DD

@crimson-thinker

What's Foxy's grief stereotype/virus method? I'm not quite sure I understand the question so forgive me if I give the wrong answer.. But I'm thinking that means "what is Foxy's mental situation in the swap AU?" If that's the case, his mental state can be described in 1 sentence. "He refuses to move on."

Partial Swap Foxy was deeply effected by the loss of Freddy and Chica. So much so that he kind'a acts like.. they're still around.?

The other animatronics have cut out anything Freddy/Chica related in their lives. But for Foxy, the act of removing/avoiding everything Freddy/Chica related just makes the grief more painful. To him it feels like he's discarding their memory. Like doing that is saying they didn't matter or shouldn't be remembered. It just makes them feel more dead..

Foxy is the only animatronic that will go back to that old show stage. Sometimes in his darkest times he will talk to the stage. As if Freddy and Chica are still standing on it and can hear him..

When talking to Gregory, he is similar to Freddy. Acting all chipper and like nothing is wrong. Though if Freddy and Chica are mentioned.. he wouldn't avoid the subject like Freddy would. He would talk about them, even if it rips him up from the inside. He would answer all of Gregory's questions about them and tell him stories. Even if it brought him to tears and their memory was almost too painful to bear. Foxy refuses to let go of the past. And despite how painful it is, he keeps dragging the past around with him like a dead weight. Freddy does the same thing but as he drags the past around he refuses to look at it. If.. If that makes sense--

Basically- Freddy and Foxy are both stuck in the past. But Freddy refuses to acknowledge that he is. And Foxy openly acknowledges it, even if it kills him inside..

(Also note: The main obstacle that Foxy would pose to little Vanessa is that Foxy is faster than Bonnie. And as a Glamrock, Foxy is pretty tough. So if he finds out that Bonnie is hiding a child in his stomach hatch? Well.. he might just have the means necessary to catch Bonnie and rip her out.. :x )

For the second question! Partial swap Freddy is more openly miserable than Classic Bonnie, yes.. But he doesn't miss the singing and the spot light. He misses his friends and making kids happy.

Seeing how sad all his friends are.. seeing how messed up Foxy is.. how defeated Bonnie is.. that's what depresses him. That's what makes him cry..

Thank you! I'm so glad you like him! :DDD

I imagined that Freddy just threw the old clothes away. They were really dirty and torn and Gregory didn't care about them.

He probably took some trash out of a bin, put the clothes in and then put the trash on top. Effectively burying the clothes so that no one would see it.

AAA THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! :DDDD✨💜💖✨

@ocinstituterep

1: ReBLOGS, are allowed. RePOSTS, are NOT allowed. 👌

2: My Glamrock Freddy is probably pretty depressed :( and his depression has had years to develop and get slowly worse. 7-10 on the depressing scale.

But partial swap Freddy? His life just came crashing down. So he may also be depressed now, but he hasn't had any time to really develop it. Probablyyyy a 4-10?

@dragon-fly34

I'm glad you like my AU! But sorry! I don't take requests and I don't personally support that ship.. <:/

#my response #fnaf security breach #octonauts above and beyond spoilers #octonauts #deltarune #undertale

[trashboatprince]

Here we go again, another one-shot of Fourteen in retirement!

And this time it's about them and their retirement squish~

Warning: anxiety issue for the Doctor that makes them too nauseous to eat (Don't worry, this isn't going in a specific direction, this is just general anxiety making someone feel sick)

As always, I use they/them for Fourteen. Also, at this point, I'd like to think that Fourteen is keeping in contact with some of the companions, like Tegan, Ace, Martha, the Fam, so if you're wondering about the mention of Ace or their friends, it's that.

Also, the art is mine. I know I've posted it before, but this fic is based on the doodles.

On with the fic!

--

"Oi! Spaceman!" Donna's voice carried from somewhere beyond the bathroom door. "Hurry up! Breakfast is almost ready and I am not saving you a plate!"

The Doctor scoffed, shouting back that they were finishing up with getting dressed.

"Yeah, yeah, just make it quick!"

They rolled their eyes, smiling as they grabbed for the button up hanging from a knob on a cabinet in their personal bathroom. Ah, it was such a nice thing to have now that they owned their own home, not having to share a bathroom with Rose like at the temporary home UNIT gave them.

They hadn't expected to meet someone as high maintenance as themself when it came to getting ready in the morning, but Rose was a worthy opponent for races to the bathroom.

They hummed to themself as they got the buttons done up on the shirt with an unconscious ease, their attention mainly on their reflection in the mirror. Did they need to shave, they thought as they grabbed for their favorite vest.

Hmm... probably not, it wasn't anything serious. In fact, they thought they looked rather-

Huh?

The Doctor frowned, tugging at the vest, trying to get the button into its hole, but noticing that it... wasn't quite making it. That's odd. Had this shrunk in the wash? Oh, they told Sylvia how to wash it specifically, she better not have just tossed it in!

This is why the Doctor usually just did their laundry in the TARDIS, she always did their clothing perfectly in her machines. For the most part. Sometimes there was a hiccup or two.

Looking down, the Doctor struggled to get it through the hole before finally succeeding. But it wasn't a perfect victory, it was... it was a really tight fit.

"This is... tighter." They frowned, tugging on the vest, and noticing something else.

It wasn't the only thing that felt a bit tight.

The button up fit fine enough, not yet tucked into their pants, but the pants themselves? Well, they felt a tad bit tighter around their waist, and the Doctor wasn't exactly liking that. They tried to adjust them, but it wasn't much.

"Did you shrink in the wash too?" They asked their clothes before lifting up the shirt, eyes widening a little.

Oh, that's new.

There was a slight difference to their waist, a bit more to it than they really remembered. Actually, when was the last time they really checked out this new-old body? Hmm... probably not since their first week of retirement, when they finally sat down and did a self-check over all of their body.

Same face and teeth, same eye issue which required the glasses to be worn a bit more often because it was slightly more annoying now, same minor issues that the old face had. Except there wasn't a mole on their back, it was actually up on their left hip, which was interesting.

There was also the fact that they were much thinner and a bit more worn down this time around, which Donna have pointed out a few times.

Oh, and more freckles, but that was more for the Doctor to be excited over, they liked the freckles. Freckles were cool.

Uhg, Chinny was still an influence, wasn't he?

Still, this was different. The Doctor poked at their stomach, feeling the softness when it had been a bit harder before. What was going on?

How had they not noticed this before? Had it happened overnight? Was it something they ate? Had it happened when they got into that drinking challenge on Sebvie 4 with Ace last week? They hadn't been sure of some of the drinks the Sebv had challenged them with...

Or was it from eating that biscuit they found in the TARDIS library yesterday?

"DOCTOR! Hurry your arse up!" Donna's shout snapped the Doctor from their worried thoughts and they quickly bolted from the bathroom, tossing off the tight vest. They'd deal with it later, best not to keep the family waiting.

"What took you so long?" Donna huffed as the Doctor rushed to the table, jumping into their favorite chair at it.

"Oh, you know." They grinned, gesturing at themself. "Takes a lot of work to be this beautiful."

Donna scoffed, then handed them a cup of coffee, perfectly measured to allow them to pour as much flavored creamer and sugar into it as they'd like.

Breakfast was a full spread, as it always was on Sundays, and the family tucked in. The Doctor decided to distract himself with conversation and tasty food, ignoring the slight, unexpected weight gain.

However, while they were washing dishes, it came back to them as they shifted where they stood. The pants were still tight, and it was bothering them. They felt tighter.

They'd need to run some tests, look into whatever this was. If it was dangerous, it could affect his family! Can't have that! Maybe it was a strange side effect of being on Earth this long?

No, no, they'd been on Earth for ages before, several times. They never had this issue.

But then again, the Doctor had been quite active. Running about, solving problems, not staying in one place like this. Even working in the Black Archives now wasn't anything like working as the Chief Science Officer before.

"Somethin' on your mind, son?" Wilf asked and the Doctor turned to look at him, as he pulled the milk from the fridge. The Doctor held out the mug they had been washing, might as well let him use that if he was getting himself tea.

"Oh, it's... nothing. Just thinking."

"Thinking about what?" Wilf took the mug and grabbed for the kettle that had been on the stove, pouring himself hot water for his tea. "Work stuff? Aliens?"

"Uhhh..." The Doctor didn't want to trouble him with this issue. "Thinking about this video that Rose showed me the other day. Really interesting stuff, it was this guy playing video games and talking over them. She said I should do it, would be really funny."

"Oh yes." Wilf laughed. "I don't understand any of that nonsense."

"Yeah, neither do I." The Doctor grinned, once more distracted, probably for the best.

--

"This might be a problem." The Doctor muttered to themself as they stood in their bedroom, looking at the mirror before them.

It was Thursday now, just days after the discovery on Sunday, and the Doctor hadn't done much to look into what could have caused the softness around their middle.

But it seemed to be in other places as well.

They knew their body well, it was Time Lord nature to do so. They could tell that there was more of this softness in other places. Just barely there, nothing to be noticed by anyone else but themself. A tiny bit in the arms, the thighs, and maybe just the slightest bit in the chest and face, but it was mainly there in the small pudge around their middle.

They stood in front of the mirror in their boxers, and watched as their reflection pinched the squish. They wracked their brain over what caused it, but nothing came to mind.

Well, except for one thing. Which should have been obvious from the start, but their instincts didn't really... click for that.

It was just weight gain. Perfectly, ordinary weight gain. A normal thing for normal species, right? Well, not for the Doctor. Because the Doctor always ran, always forgot to eat, always did this and that and didn't eat much except for nibbles and such.

But being with the Noble-Temple family meant living by their schedules. Three meals a day, Donna made sure of it. With tea (or in the Doctor's case, coffee) time, and some snacking through the day as they worked on projects at home, in the TARDIS, or on the days they went to work.

Was this normal?

To gain weight like this?

They'd been retired for about six or so months now, was this supposed to happen? Were they doing this thing right? Or was this a bad sign, that they were not doing this correctly, that this was a step in the wrong direction?

The Doctor turned away from the mirror, they needed to stop looking and get back to getting dressed. They grabbed a t-shirt from the closet and some jeans. No work today, they were going to fix the old box TV in Wilf's sunroom so he could watch programs from another galaxy.

They smoothed their shirt down and bit their lip, an uncomfortable feeling was in the pit of their stomach, twisting itself in knots. Uhg, they hated when they got themself so worked up like this. Maybe fixing the TV would help with anxiety.

--

Donna watched her best friend at the dinner table. They had spent most of the meal chatting with Wilf and Rose about the TV in the sunroom, and how it could get access to over nine thousand channels.

She had noticed that the Doctor hadn't really touched much of their dinner. When dinner was done, she helped them with the dishes, where she washed and they put away. "So, not hungry tonight?" She asked as casually as possible.

The Doctor paused while drying off a bowl. "Huh?"

"You hardly touched your dinner tonight. You like curry, you told me my mom makes delicious curry, you typically ate two helpings."

They looked at her, frowning just a little, before putting the bowl in the cabinet. "Just... not hungry tonight."

She pulled the plug from the sink and turned to face them completely. "Bull, what's on your mind?"

"Nothing. Don't worry about it."

"Don't tell me that nonsense, Doctor. I know you." She jabbed a wet finger against their chest. "You have been troubled by something lately. You think you're so good at hiding that, but you're not. I'm your best friend, I know you inside and out. Literally. Your mind was my mind for a while."

The Doctor squirmed where they stood and they looked a bit pink in the cheeks as they glanced around. Then they sighed, leaning in close. "I... I think I'm failing this retirement thing..."

Donna raised an eyebrow. "What do you mean?"

"I just... I noticed something. On Sunday. And I think it's a sign that I'm doing bad at this, that the calm life isn't working for me."

She felt the pricklings of worry as she listened, and she touched their arm. "Go sit down, we're gonna talk about this."

"Do we have to?" They asked, a whine in their voice.

"Yes, you knob. If it makes you feel better, we're do this in your weird study." The Doctor nodded and left the kitchen for said study, which was more of just a room full of weird books and things they had collected over the years, and a couch that looked uncomfortable but was the complete opposite.

That's where she found them sitting when she entered the room, two mugs in her hands. One with coffee with just a dash of milk, the other one mainly that nasty candy bar creamer with a dash of coffee, just as the two of them liked their drinks.

The Doctor took the offered mug, looking at it with a complicated stare. Donna rolled her eyes and sat down on the other side of the couch, taking a long drink from her mug. "Start talking."

"About?"

"What you think is the matter."

With a small, weird noise from their throat, they set the mug aside to adjust how they were seated on the couch. They leaned back and grabbed at the hem of their shirt and slowly pulled it up. "I've gained weight."

Donna stared at their torso, where there was a bit of pudge there, nothing to really write home about. "Really? That's it?"

The Doctor looked at her, confused. "What do you mean 'that's it'? Is this not... I dunno, a bad sign or something?"

"How?"

"I-" And then they stopped, giving this some thought. "I don't know. I mean, is it normal to gain weight when recovering and taking the slow path?"

Donna groaned, slapping her forehead. "You're the smartest person on Earth, and yet you are a great, big doof! Of course it's normal!"

"It is?"

"Yes! It's a perfectly good sign, actually! Lots of people gain weight when recovering from stress, trauma, and PTSD! My granddad did after the war, told me so himself. Said he came back a scrawny thing and had felt bad about things, but when he started to get better, he ate right and put on weight. It's perfectly normal, and it means you're adapting to a calm life."

The Doctor looked at their stomach, poking it. "So... this is a sign I'm recovering?"

Donna nodded. "Yep! Just like how you look less exhausted. I know the nightmares still come and go, but you've been sleeping better, right?"

"Of course! I've been able to sleep for several hours without a single nightmare waking me up for the past two weeks!" The Doctor stated, waving their hands.

"There you go, this is working. You just being here, not running around, trying to ignore your problems like you had been doing. You've got your friends hanging out with you, you have a job that you actually like, and you still run around, but without having to save the day all the time cause the beautiful Doctor is out there doing it for you."

"Oi! I'm beautiful too!"

"I'm not going to call my pseudo-brother beautiful." Donna made a face and they laughed. "You're starting to enjoy the slow, Doctor. And there's nothing wrong with this." She leaned over and tapped at the softness they had gained. "In fact, it's nice to see you with some meat on your bone."

The Doctor nodded, taking this in. "So, retirement squish is perfectly normal?"

Donna wanted to question the Doctor on their choice of describing this as that, but decided not to. "Yep. Means you're relaxing and doing well."

They perked up a bit. "Oh! Brilliant!"

The Doctor grabbed their coffee mug, taking a long drink. "That's good, cause I was worried and kinda freaking out about it. A lot."

"Please don't tell me you didn't eat dinner because of this..." She winced.

"What?" The Doctor blinked. "Oh! No, no! I actually got myself so worked up with worry that it made me nauseous. Actually, now that I feel better about this, I could do with a nibble. I didn't have my afternoon snack today for that reason too."

"Oi, go make a sandwich or something then!" She shooed the Doctor off the couch as they laughed, getting up and fixing their shirt.

They turned to look at her, smiling. "Thanks, Donna. Sorry about this, I didn't know what to make of it, I'm not... I'm not used to taking it slow. I don't know what to expect, what's a good sign or a bad sign."

She stood up and looked at her best friend, smiling just a bit. "I get it. Trust me, I do. After losing my memories, it was hard to get back on track. After Rose came out, it was an adjustment to knowing if I was doing the right thing or the wrong thing. I'm here to help you along this one, spaceman. Don't ever forget that."

The Doctor grinned and gave her a hug. "Thank you. I'll come to you for things like this, I promise." They pulled back. "You really think it's a good look for me though? The retirement squish?"

"Oh yeah." Donna grinned back. "Also, are you really going to call it that?"

"Of course! That's what it is!" That's one way to call it that.

--

I hope I wrote this right, I have my own issues with weight that I'm working on, but I felt like the Doctor did when I was younger after I had lost a lot of weight due to medical stuff and started gaining it back when I was healing. I hadn't been sure if it was a good thing or a bad thing, but it is a good thing.

#doctor who #fourteenth doctor #donna noble #wilfred mott #john's drabbles

[ganondoodle]

sorry, long post, got totk thoughts ...again

first botw vs totk shrines aesthetic and meaning; then shiekah symbolism thats overtaken by sonau

botw vs totk shrines (not in quality of puzzle since i talked about that a little before, but as in aesthetic, meaning etc)

something that worked well with shiekah shrines in botw was that these things were built SPECIFICALLY to make a future link stronger, theres that denialability to it that kinda make sense when you think about it, they are small challenges for the future hero to test and make them stronger, they are spread around the world bc you wouldnt want to hide some major source of power in one place, a monk literally sacrifices their life to enable you to gain more power their dead body waiting for you at the end (neat!!), they are each a little different in pose and clothing and im pretty sure its implied each monk made the puzzle for their shrine themselves; and the ones that rely on something happening in the world first can also be explained by their ability to see the future, the shrines and towers all rise up from the ground, which gives them that believable sense of they have been down there all this time and been activated via the net connecting them all to signal it is time- their design is also just .. nice? its got a nice contrast of the dark and the ligher brown with eye catching light from orange to blue to pink telling you in what states of operation it is (idle, working/done, corrupted) and their shape design is a very striking mix of bigger emptier spots of dark with the lighter browns wiggly lines coming in in nicely paced patches and the strong lights poking through giving you a nice soemthign for your eyes to look at (their tech is also a mix of magic stuff AND mechanism, they still look and work kinda magical but still have cogs and springs and looks like they are actual maschines put together)

totk shrines have no real denialability to why they are the way they are, its pretty clear that they are there for game reasons (and to copy botw i guess?) with no proper thought given to it (or failed to convey); they are already there when zelda does her time travel bs, and i heard (havent seen it myself? or dont remember) that the sonau shrines were built to .. keep monsters at bay? ok, im not even gonna question that part ( ... but i am .. i guess lightmagic wahtever dont think about it) so .... why do they contain a puzzle at all? its not to prevent monsters from entering since you need raurus hand to activate it (in botw you need the shiekah stone to do so which isnt really found besides yours either but ... their purpose is to test and empower you anyway .. and pehaps in a wider range to strengthen the bond with other folks when you have to work with them to get to it) then they werent present in botw so they must have ... somehow appeared out of nowhere? their connection to the lightroots might have been an attempt to try and make them feel more connected but that didnt work either imo, the shrines on the surface mirror lightroots in the underground, implying they are connected somehow, i at first thought like the lightroot is their root and the shrine is the flowerbud, but its very clearly just some ...magic rock crystal with stuff built around it including a teleportation thing thats pretty much copied from the shiekah ones (??) and you somehow ... enter magic dimension (which is .. fine, but i liked how in botws it was an elevator going down, making it feel like you are put into a physical room underground) but then there .... are also shrines in the sky ... that have no lighroot to connect to .. (i guess .. magic light wahtever dont htinkaboutit) so that part kinda falls flat- and the bring-crystal-to-shrine-spot (uhg) also debunk that thought since its a (tasty looking) green crystal that just kinda warps into a big grey rock ... for some reason, at their end is always the same colorless statue of da kind and his fridge wife (not her build) they are also missing that denialability that they were built for link specifically, sonau cant see into the future so (unless they yoinked that from the shiekah too??).. how does .. anything of that work then? especially with the crystal ones given that they are always a blessing shrine sicne bringing the crystal to its spot is counted as the puzzle but they couldnt have known that thats where it would end up at (and then ...how and why would you put a shrine thing into a crystal thing and disconnect it and throw it whereever when it manifests somehow again thousands years later- i need to stop thinking about it)- then their aesthetic is white green and gold(ish) which is a nice color combination in itself tho its lacking that neat status singaling and the eye catching contrast with their glow, the green glowy bits dont stand out as much, their shape design i dislike alot since it ... looks kinda unfinished and in a strange disconnect to their tech; buildings and statues are very blocky solid colors with the occasional rune or dragon carved into, which is also very blocky and one colored, their shapes are pretty uniform in a blocky way, theres not alot of shape contrast anywhere besides basic smaller block and bigger block, the most interesting looking ones are the ... outer walls of the shrines with their scaled look and the ground with the circle patterns; their tech and clothing is in a strange disconnect, its got a gree-tealish scale like texture in anything solid, be it tech or ornaments, it also features alot more gold and also brown stones that look rather untouched- now, for clothing, that is fine, the shiekah didnt dress like their tech either (.... mostly, ancient armor does exist) BUT the constructs and tech also have that more natural look to them

the fact that the same blocky statue waits for you at the end alsso removes not just coolness but also personality, instead of individual monks that gave their life for you and you setting them free once you take their spirit orb its the same representation of the holy king and queen giving you some light juice to cure you more of miasma .. which doesnt actually matter sicne you get your normal arm back no matter how many light juices you got at the end anyway (their "tech" also just looks less like actual maschinery and much more like .. magic tm, the constructs have nothing maschinery like about them and are just floating rings animated by green magic wiggle lines and function almost the same as literal bokblins with the added thing of being able to fuse/use tech.. the empty spot of a threat like the guardians is very prominent once you realize that the constructs are largely just like a reskinned bokblin, and the miasma hands, while neat, are more like a surprise jumpscare and less like a looming threat and are also not taken to their full potential)

theres also a disconnect between the sonau as we are introduced to them in totk and the actual sonau ruins from botw, which share a common dragon motive but have a much more .. MORE aesthetic, theres even color present you dont see anywhere in totk sonau stuff, like the red paint- you are given the explanation that those are ruins built by hylians as a monument to the sonau but i think it falls very flat sicne its clear it wasnt designed to be meant like that in botw and also looks much more withered than the totk sonau ruins which rarely look withered at all despite being even older than the botw ruins; im very sure its jsut an excuse bc their design for totk sonaus got changed ... for some reason, just like their "barbaric" origins in the phirone/faron region

shiekah symbolism and more kinda overtaken by sonau

so, soemthing i really dont like about the sonau as well is that theres quite a bit that they take from shiekah and kinda... present it as being the origin of it, actually;

we all know the very dominant symbol of the eye/third eye with three eyelashes and a tear drop for the shiekah which is established in the very first chronological game (skyward sword) but also featured in alot of other zeldas, it symbolizing their connection to hylia and their foresight (perhaps even more? i dont know everything); now we got the sonau who ... have a LITERAL third eye (and it doesnt even look special ..) that has three lashes and they paint tear drops under their eyes... (which has only the connection to .. the tears zelda sheds when shes a dragon, no other character does so at any other point, lol?) it makes it seem like we are to assume that the shiekah got their symbols from the sonau, actually, just like their tech wasnt their invention either but the sonaus, actually, who are new to the franchise and have no other connection to anything of past games, unlike the shiekah who have been there from the start really

then theres the tech, the ancient shiekah had very advanced, mystical tech in botws ancient history and now the even MORE ancient sonau had even MORE advanced tech way before them in totks lore which goes beyond even botws ancient history

im not saying symbols gotta be exclusive to one group of people but .. it holds alot of significance carried from the older games too, it feels strange for them to highjack the shiekah symbols and achievements WITHIN the two games that are supposedly directly connected in timeline and world (while also pairing them with those supposedly aniecnt hylian feather crowns and belly out look ... which, im no expert but i raise my eyebrow at that) together with the fact that nearly any and all traces of shiekah tech, except for the little needed parts that are never called that though and are just footnotes .. if anything, are precisely erased feels .... off

another long ramble about my thougths about totk, some people graciously call them analysis but i wouldnt say its that, its jsut a largely incoherent waterfall of words that would have spun around in my head for weeks if i didnt write them out and i keep coming up with more thoughts bc im thinking about the rewrite and well ...

im gonna have art soon again ... promise <(＿　＿)>

#ganondoodles talks #zelda #totk #ganondoodles rambles #long post #man i feel bad when i make a post as long as this #i never intend to make it this long but it keeps happening #this is what goes around in my head all day #just so much thought head full #i also feel like peopel GOTTA be tired of my rambles by now #youd think i have mentioned everything there is to mention #and some things i HAVE talked about before too #but i had ..................... more thoughts ..........