doubt
fall backwards into sleep, avoidance of another day; stumbling through words, small leaps of faith.
seen never heard, as god intended it.
fall backwards into baskets, 500 before midnight. hands in prayer over dinner, head bowed in faith, interventions divine.
an unveiling ceremony, for voices louder than mine.
does being seen and sometimes heard make me better than god?
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WELCØME BACK TØ TRENCH
CLANCY | TWENTY ØNE PILØTS | 5/24
i decided to re-edit my other post as each song comes out, to both match the vibes if need be and to add a lyric i love
so check back periodically for updates! excited to see how well the original holds up
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remember when we thought the new era was gonna involve purple and butterflies
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caretaker
- a dialogue heavy one shot
⚠️ heavy depictions of mental illness
⚠️ thoughts of death (not suicide)
⚠️ based on my own experiences w schizophrenia
a story in which josh waits for tyler's meds to kick in.
"ty, you okay?"
"yea why"
"you've been talking to yourself. loudly."
"eh? oh. sorry"
tyler fiddles with a loose string on his sweatshirt.
" 's okay. what are you talking about?"
"nothing. sorry i'll try to be quieter."
josh tried to school his expression, he didn't like when tyler kept things from him. the two had gone through so much, been there for everything, there wasn't anything too much for them. he settled for furrowing his brows, ears tingling as the vibrations from tyler's mutters reached him.
disorganized words, halfway understood. talking about god, electricity traveling through the air, eyes. josh reached a hand out over the table to his friend,
"ty?"
tyler looked up, not quite at josh, but close enough.
"yea?"
"what's he saying?"
"i dunno. the sky is lightening, i think i see the electricity-"
tyler had taken his meds today, the emergency ones, different from his regular ones. it's been 15 minutes, sitting across his friend talking about nothing and everything, trapped, eyes tired and thoughtless.
"do you think we'll die? today? maybe right now?"
tyler reached for his throat, fingers pressing to his artery. he gasped, suddenly looking back to josh.
"josh- its gone-"
josh leaned over, grabbing ahold of tyler's wrist. he guides it closer to his collarbone, right where he could see the throb of his blood pressure dancing against his skin. tyler sighed with relief,
"oh. josh i'm alive- josh i'm alive, im so happy. you made me alive"
josh held onto his wrist lightly, smiling. things were hard recently, but he promised himself, he'd always be the one to keep tyler alive.
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