#today was so difficult fuck

[lululeighsworld]

it was literally their moment and they just let us watch

(if you need me i'll be marinating in this for the foreseeable future)

#magneto #rogue #rogneto #rogueneto #IT WAS SO DIFFICULT TO PICK ONLY 10 IMAGES. SOSOSOSO DIFFICULT. EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS SCENE WAS FUCKING SUBLIME. #thank you to the person who pointed out the bg music is ace of base 'happy nation' ;wwwwwww; SUCH A GOOD SONG FOR THIS #okay but for real never have i had a stronger 'GOD I WISH THAT WERE ME' moment #magneto can we all form a queue to dance with you romantically in the air while an audience watches............. #their body language. their HANDS. OLD MAN WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH YOUR MOUTH AND YOUR TONGUE BY HER NECK #no word of a lie ive probably watched this scene 200 times today. new comfort media. inject it directly into my veins. #my husband laughing at me as i rewind and play over and over again from the other side of the room #my fave fave FAAAAVE part of this animation is the lil pan they do #the one between mags and rogue and the lyric 'where the people understand and dream of perfect man' #THERE IS SOMETHING SO SOFT AND ROMANTIC AND ADORING ABOUT IT #disintegrates like a sopping wet piece of bread. thank you animators who worked on this scene #i feel like i am burning with the excitement of a thousand suns over this #xmen 97 #leigh's magneto hours

[khaire-traveler]

Ok, I'm burnt out, pretty grumpy, and having a really hard time, so I'll be turning asks off for awhile. Posting will be more sporadic. I know I don't have to announce things like this, I figure I'll let people know so they don't think I'm ignoring them or anything. I'm just having a shit time, y'all.

Take care, everyone.

#personal #blog post #sorry for literally just coning back from a posting a break and leaving immediately after #shit just really fucking sucks today #I've been having a shit time throughout this entire move #but the moment we got on the road and the moments after have been fucking hell #i didnt sleep well most of these nights either #as I've been sharing a bed with my mom #and she's used to a bigger bed so she keep stealing blankets and kneeing me in the side #I'm just having a shit time #even spirituality has veen difficult lately #i haven't been able to feel the presence of any deities and that's been reallt hard #because it feels like I'm praying without reason sometimes #but i try to push through those feelings #but i also just feel bad that i keep asking and asking for hwlp without being able to give offerings atm #i just don't feel well #and there's not much i can do about it

[crybaby-bkg]

Bakugou hates this fucking time of year. Mainly because of the cold and dreary weather, but also because of the holidays and the upcoming expectations of and from him. He’s a damn good gift giver—when he wants to be, and only because he listens, also when he wants to—but the part he hates the most about it?

Gift wrapping. It’s a damn obligation from hell. He’d rather go out and buy all the gift boxes and bags and bows and shit before he’d ever wrap a gift. Maybe he hates it because he’s not automatically good at it, maybe he hates it because it’s just fucking stupid and useless if you’re just gonna tear through the wrapping paper anyway!

But he does it, for you and only you. Only because you came home at the beginning of the month with armfuls of wrapping paper and bows and gift tags and tissue paper and—and too much red and green and white. You’re so excited, and he can’t deny how cute you look sticking your tongue out when you cut the wrapping paper around the gift you got for Mina.

He stares at the present he brought you months in advance, wonders what’s so hard about wrapping a tiny little velvet box? And discovers his hatred all over again for wrapping paper and tape and shear scissors and dumb sticky bows. But the face you make at him? When he hands you the hand wrapped gift hidden under the tree on a horrendously cold morning?

It makes him warmer inside than he cares to admit. You don’t make fun of his wrapping skills or how there’s too much tape and that one hole he made in it when he gripped it too hard. You only grin at him, tear into the gift with haste, whisper about how nice it is to get some hand wrapped from him knowing how much he hated it. But maybe—maybe he doesn’t hate it so much now. Not if it gets this reaction out of you every time.

#thought about this while I was wrapping my nieces gifts today lol #damn near CRIED!!!!! #have y’all ever had to wrap a baby alive or a fucking ARCHERY SET???? #HELLO???? #so difficult for no reason #my personal hc for me n bkg is that he hates winter like how I hate fall lol #we’re both miserable until spring comes around and then suddenly everything is okay #also is it tacky to wrap an engagement ring LOL that’s not what I pictured in the box but still I’m curious #I pictured a nice necklace or bracelet that is personal to you #like a bday gemstone or the like #BUT IS IT TACKY???? #and would u beat him up if he did that bc I think I would a little bit #alright gn I am tired and want that new mozzarella sandwich from Wendy’s #—new treat in the streets! 🍫 #bakugou treats! 🍬

[arowrath]

#text #polls #im rly curious abt this #i havent painted in foreverrr :{ i took an oil painting class that i loved but working with paint that never dries was difficult #but also helpful to be able to wipe it off even like a week after i fucked up lol #i liked it tho !! i wish id gotten to spend more time on my final bc it was so fun but i wasnt quite done #literally went in with a paint pen like last month to touch up some stuff #might go try and finish it fully but idkkkk. i dont have oil paints so id have to do it in acrylic and idk how easy itd be #ANYWAy #ive never worked with ink before and i only have worked with oil paint in that class #but the other three ive used a lot and when it comes to on Paper and not canvas #acrylic dries fast which is difficult for me #and watercolor dries slow bc. thats water. and it doesnt always go where i want it to #so usually i prefer gouache bc its a little thicker but not too thick and it dries quick but not too quick. a happy medium #just like goldilocks #on canvas tho i usually prefer acrylic #i think bc i get scared to use up my gouache paints on a bigger canvas #^saying all this and i havent painted in months. </3 #im not even particularly good at it i just like it. makes me happy #waugh. its nice out today maybe i'll go out and paint :} it miught rain tho #so who knows

[frogtossing]

AAARRRWWWWWGGGGGHMMMMMMMNN

#this stupid outfit + song is all i’ve been able to talk about today #he’s been delivering so hard recently oh my hod #fanart #käärijä #my art #doodle #kärtsäri my beloved #also this expression is fucking difficult to draw jesus christ #also can you tell that i have no fucking clue what’s going on with this outfit??? #what the hell is he wearing #not complaining cuz massive slay but dear god #what the hell

[norringtondeservestheworld]

Ben Lambert in "Angels in Small Change (2013)"

my gift for my dear friend and mutual @feenmies

HAPPY BIRTHDAY FEENIE!!! YOU ARE THE BEST!!!!

BONUS BEN'S BACK

#sorry feenie I know nothing about genshin impact so I made this #luckily I saw your post about your bday days ago if I saw it today or yesterday I wouldn't be able to do this in time #I didn't liked or commented it because I wanted this to be a surprise I am such a genius LOL #I hope you like it because you have no idea how difficult it was to find this fucking short #pretty sure finding the actual Ben Lambert in real life is easier it took me two days to find it #and tbh words cannot describe my disappointment at this short having 0 gay kisses #you cast Lambert for a gay role and you don't make him have a single gay kiss?? Jail. #ANYWAY I WISH YOU A REALLY HAPPY GAY BIRTHDAY FEENIE YOU DESERVE IT!!!!

[raiiny-bay]

oc deep dive questionnaire - dhes edition

tagged by @sikoi (ty you for the tag!! <3)

-what common/uncommon fear do they have? tbh, there's not much that scares Dhes. when he was younger, he feared rejection, but that fear has lessened significantly as he's gotten older & become more comfortable with himself

-do they have any pet peeves? he's pretty particular about housekeeping, so his biggest pet peeves tend to be related to that. but he especially hates when Kelly leaves his shoes lying around instead of putting them away (bc Dhes *always* trips over them lol)

-what are 3 items you can find in their bedroom? CDs (lots of CDs), a tamagotchi (he brings it to work. it never stays alive long), & notes that he & Kel wrote back & forth to each other during class throughout their teen years

-what do they notice first in a person? whether or not they look directly at him/look him in the eyes

-on a scale of 1-10, how high is their pain tolerance? probably 8 or 9

-do they go into fight or flight mode when under pressure? fight - Dhestyn's a fighter through & through

-do they come from a big family/are they a family person? his family is pretty average, size-wise. his family dynamic is very eccentric, so whether or not he's a "family person" is kind of a complicated answer. he's not particularly close with anyone in his immediate family, but he does talk to them & visit them often

-what animal represents them best? a dog - generally, he's very friendly & loyal, but in the right circumstances, he does tend to bite

-what is a smell that they dislike? burning meat

-have they broken any bones? if so, how? several, mostly his fingers & wrists though. he's broken them in skateboarding accidents, during fights with other kids when he was in middle/high school, & by simply making poor decisions due to his reckless nature :-)

-how would a stranger likely describe them? i actually kind of explained this on his character page, but to sum it up people tend to see Dhes as either very charming or very unsavory

-are they a night owl or a morning bird? both! Dhes has a horrific sleep schedule. he'll regularly stay up until 1-2am & he wakes up at 5 o'clock every morning. though if he had to choose one, he prefers mornings

-what is a flavor they hate and a flavor they love? he really likes cinnamon. he's not a big fan of seafood.

-do they have any hobbies? yes! skateboarding, hacky sack, making playlists & listening to music, working out (weights/jogging), fashion (read: "fashion"), & ruining his hair, to name a few.

-boom, surprise birthday party! how do they react to surprises? Dhestyn always appreciates a nice surprise

-do they like to wear jewelry? if so, what is their favorite piece? yes, the man loves to accessorize. his favorite piece of "jewelry" is actually a necklace Kel gave to him when they were fifteen - it's a simple black cord with one of Kel's old guitar picks on it.

-do they have neat or messy handwriting? somewhere in the middle - it's legible, at least.

-what are two emotions they feel the most? love & anger

-do they have a favorite fabric? not particularly, no

-what kind of accent do they have? standard PNW accent when speaking English, though occasionally he'll have hints of a more Mexican-American accent, which he picked up from his mom's side of the family

tagging: @mobwhim, @lynzishell, @vicciouxs, @teddybearsims, & @salemssimblr (feel free to ignore ofc!)

#tag game #dhestyn #myedits #been really into doodling on my edits lately. idk why. #i was going to keep my answers concise but then i thought. fuck it #today we ramble #regarding his fear of rejection: it hasn't gone away entirely. it just like. doesn't have a hold on him the way it used to yk #he still very much has that like. underlying fear that he doesn't belong anywhere. he just tries to ignore it #it was actually really hard to think of stuff dhes would keep in his bedroom that isn't obvious (like. a bed lol) #bc 1 - dhes keeps a really clean room & house #literally nothing is out of place #& 2 - the boys live in a studio apartment. so like. technically their couch is in their bedroom. & so is everything else they own #the emotion question was also really hard to answer bc dusty is an emotional guy #like........ everything he feels is x100 & it is very difficult to distinguish whether those feelings are positive or negative #bc his reactions to both are more or less the same lol #also i did use a font for his handwriting. i've been trying to find handwriting fonts for all my OCs but #i've only been able to find some for the boys #n e way. #that's all.

[chiropteracupola]

the amount of time I spend on tumblr dot com has given me quite the set of standards when it comes to artworks on the theme of 'Trans Angel', and actual museums are failing to meet those standards quite spectacularly.

#news from the cupola #if you don't want to hear a lot of inane whining stop reading this post Here. #today once again I saw this particular sculpture entitled exactly that. it is the most unpleasant thing I have ever beheld. #it is relevant that it is a sculpture about the transamerica pyramid and not about Transgender things. but I do keep forgetting that. #so many errors were made in the construction of this fucking thing. I have seen it maybe thrice at this point and it has not grown on me #in the slightest. and I know that the conversation about Good Art and what makes Good Art is certainly fraught. #but by my lights whatever this is this isn't good art #maybe it's partially that this thing is displayed among some really wild examples of Just What Can Be Done With Clay #it's surrounded by hundreds of years' worth of technical mastery and it fails to be anything of note except bad to see! #clunky sculpting! ugly glazing! forms that are difficult to parse but also not very interesting once you do see them! #and why in the goddamn does it have the twitter logo sculpted all over it. what is Happening. #everything else by this artist in this exhibit is also not great in similar ways? #it's not even bad in a way that's interesting! it's just. not good! #it all feels like they're trying far too hard to make Art That Means Something and missing by a mile #also. no one calls the transamerica pyramid that. You Say The Whole Name. or you just point at it and say 'that one'

[natjennie]

sorry i havent been very active lately I've been having a real shit couple days idk why

#ive been like right on the verge of a breakdown all day today #and i can feel it coming. the tears are IN my eyes. #it's just. everything is so hard. #it can't be this hard all the time for everyone right? #because if it is and everyone is just being normal and doing fine and coping and being an adult about it #then that makes me a failure. #and i dont know what im supposed to do with that. #its also so fucking hard to see something you might want for yourself #and be inundated with the weight of all the barriers #and all the ways that you'll never get there #all the reasons it wont work. everything just feels so difficult #like EVERYTHING everything everything is minimum 10 steps and it never fucking ends #idk why im feeling so bad like ive been taking my medicine ive been trying really hard to eat and drink and take them #like no matter what i do im always in pain and tired and sad and frustrated #and it never fucking stops #anyway sorry #venting #vent post

[loveletterworm]

Umm time for an oc post jumpscare Frank's bestest friend who he doesn't know very well and literally just met and doesn't like and is scared of (his name is attery and he is literally just a human person...i would explain his situation further but i dont feel like it sorry this will all just be contextless for today)

#my art #oc #if you are wondering why he is kind ofliterally green in some of these. Idk jaundice probably #I always color him like that but for some reason today he looks strange maybe because i color shifted that one big drawing here too much #and it ended up being less green. #Attery is actually not a new character at all. He was like i think the 3rd character i designed for this thingy. like a year and a half ag #I just never mentioned him even moreso than i never mentioned the other 2 i never mention #because the timeframe of which he is present in anyone else's life is i think probably extremely short. #So its difficult to think of arbitrary things to draw him doing while i put off saying the specifics or working out the specifics at all #But fucking wahtever i want to post attery. I drew him as an amongus. #AND i used a reference for a pose can you tell. Can you tell. I drew a person with SHOULDERS!!! AHHH!!! #pbm

[wowbright]

Ugh why lately do I keep remembering traumatic events from my childhood that explain so much?

#gpoy #actually cptsd #I'm not talking about recovered memories #just things I haven't thought about in ages #and am for the first time (after a few decades) fully realizing they are fucked up #what say you not everyone's childhood was like that? whoa #also hilarious because I have known for a long time that I had a difficult childhood #how am I still discovering new layers to it #or rather new layers and how it has affected the way I relate to the world #so I mean in some ways it's good #I have had therapists who tell me it's not necessarily productive to what's the reasons why I do things #and I think that's true to some extent #because searching for them doesn't mean you'll find them & you can spend expend lots of energy searching that you could spend doing sth else #but when they just kind of appear out of nowhere and slap you in the face #it's a great opportunity to examine them and their relationship to today and go #oh fuck you mean I don't do this maladaptive thing for no reason! #I do it for a very good reason #and now I understand how it was once adaptive and helpful #and understanding that puts me in a better position to let go of it and figure out better ways to adapt to current challenges

[piplupod]

honestly i wish i didnt know as much as i do about occultism and spirituality because it is so fucking frustrating to see ppl talk about it and they very obviously do not have the knowledge that i have. like i am so open to being wrong, but i see things that ppl are saying and i'm fairly certain that they just ... do not have the depth of knowledge i do, so they say very ignorant things, or draw lines between things in an incredibly (potentially dangerously) overgeneralized way. and i am just sitting here like "oh you have no clue what you are saying right now, do you? you do not realize what you are saying is unfortunately pretty damn wrong." and i have to back away from the screen bc i do not discuss these things anymore due to the brain being constantly ready to dropkick me straight into a mental health crisis

but christ alive i think anyone who engages with spirituality needs to read up on like. essentially Everything they can get their hands on, even if they do not necessarily agree with the ideas being presented, because that way !! you learn !! and you grow to realize what things are borne out of racism and grossly mystifying other cultures and straight up white supremacy and nazi ideology and encouraging psychotic symptoms that lead to mental health crises !!!

#i hate new age spirituality so much. soooo much. 90% of it is just racism repackaged with a pretty bow on top #and nobody realizes bc they do not know what the fuck they are engaging with :))) what the roots of it all actually is !!! #and i do not necessarily blame them but i am so .... its tiring. and disconcerting. and scary. to see all of it being paraded around #esp when ppl accuse you of being ignorant or cruel for criticising smth that is so fucking dangerous or racist hsdgjkl ARGH ARGH ARGH #just bc they themselves do not realize !! it is dangerous and/or racist!! and they assume you must be wrong to criticise them!!! #sorry im just hgdsgjkl. this drives me crazy. i also hope i dont sound egotistical or high-n-mighty #but i do genuinely know i have more knowledge than the average bear (not difficult to though tbh! u just have to read a lot!!) #because i was so fucking fixated on it and went delving into so many books and pdfs and websites and did my own stuff on my own time #for several years #i was DEEP in this stuff (and boy howdy my mental health suffered for it lmfao me when i lose touch w reality almost entirely !!) #AND OBVIOUSLY. not everyone is going to have the same exps i did when they do spirituality stuff #but . it is very common esp these days. there is a whole label for it lol #ALRIGHT IM DONE RANTING NOW. im going to log off from everything for a good long while today to try to reset my nervous system lmfao #sorry for the public yelling and wailing fsdfjkl #pippen needs 2nd breakfast

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

#love that my body decided to incapacitate me the weekend before i have to read 5 different papers for classes #and it would b one thing to just read them but no for 3 of them i have to give detailed interpretation and 1 i have to present on #ive already failed to read one bc i forgot we had to do 2 papers for monday. oops. not that i could have done it anyway. i barely got 1 done #and im on track to fucking up the one due Tomorrow as well #im just fucking tired of reading fucking chemistry driven papers that i dont understand no matter how many times i read them #and everyones like oh itll get easier but no it fucking wont bc i cant fucking read right #its so fucking frustrating. why do i even bother? im so tried #i don't even have the paper im supposed to present on so ill have to do it all tomorrow. cool. great. not that i could do it today anyway #im just. this is gonna b a difficult week #and i misused my whole day by doing extractions bc i scheduled my training a week ago when i thought i would b fine over the weekend #nope. its fucking bullshit. this is y im like. y do i even want to b in academia? #how could i b a prof if i cant read well? its fine to b dyslexic as a math person but im like i have to read so much and so little gets thru #but then what the fuck else am i supposed to do? idk. im just gonna write down something for all these questions and go tf to sleep #ill get up at some horrible time in the morning to finish this. damn the consequences. ill see my therapist tomorrow anyway #and meet with my advisor like 🤪 yo guess what i made zero progress this week #sorry u got stuck with me while im going thru a year of fucking health problems #but whatever cant get rid of me now im already here. here and tired and i wanna go to bed #unrelated

[eebie]

i need to draw more yaoi yuri girlyaoi boyyuri etc......

#drawing characters interacting adn shit like Physically is so hard #hugging and leaning and carrying and pulling !!!! i need to do that more Thats such a struggle #last night fucked me up so bad i was tryna draw kissing from a reference and i just gave up the rest of the night #AND felt like shit today too!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #but im feeling better now #i just need to practice that #my rambles #that and drawing necks lol #necks are surprisingly difficult

[woundedheartwithin]

Also if you think that shipping is only about smut then that’s on you. There are many facets to shipping that have nothing to do with sex whatsoever

#she speaks #I’m mad today lol #I hate fucking purity culture man #and these people know literally nothing #because catharsis is a thing for a reason #exploring difficult scenarios in fiction is literally how humans have dealt with these things since language has been a thing #you’re free to repress yourself if you want #but I’m not gonna bottle up my emotions and my trauma just for your comfort #I tag my shit so what’s your excuse?