#though! ITS A FIGURE SKATING TERM

[lostximagination]

Pinterest this is really stupid. What do you think taking away “more ideas” is going to accomplish other than irritating users???

#I saw one person who had the more ideas thing taken away for the word GIRL #death at least kiiinda makes sense in a stupid way #though! ITS A FIGURE SKATING TERM #literally death spiral is a figure skating term! #also putting a random accent on a letter fixes it #so there’s that

[doobea]

BORN TO MAKE HISTORY - RIN ITOSHI

synopsis: After his brother takes a nasty fall and calls out before the new season starts, Rin has to step up as your new figure skating partner.

✰ ✰ ✰જ⁀➴ PLAYLIST.

contents: an ice skating au fic (very much yuri on ice inspired), fem!reader, ice skating terms and irl figures thrown around but not that super important, lmao probably inaccurate depictions of figure skating, sfw, kinda enemies to lovers but its really just rin being anti-social and cold, sae is a decent brother in here, characters are in their early-mid 20s, talks about ISU grand prix, mentions of mental health (depression, anxiety, burn out, imposter syndrome), heavy narration, rin centric, multiple parts will be added but no set scheduling of course word count: 4.3K (sigh there will be more) a/n: you know... whenever i feel like i hit a writer's block... thinking about rin always helps me break out of it so thank u...

For as long as Rin can remember, he's always followed in his brother's footsteps. 

Whatever that meant being interested in the same shows, books, and sometimes even hobbies, Rin would always be one step behind. It was a long-time habit that he picked up ever since he was little. There was a small running joke that if you wanted to find Rin, all you needed to do was find Sae. If anyone were to ask him why, he would probably shrug and refuse to answer, though his parents would gush on about how much he looks up to his older brother, and… it’s not a complete tall tale. 

His brother is talented and not in a ‘he can totally balance a stack of rocks in one try’ type of talented—though Rin is pretty sure that Sae can do that—but in a ‘he’s born with a natural gift to be absolutely perfect at everything he touches’ type of talented. So, regardless if Rin is always one step behind his brother, he knows deep down that it will always be Sae standing on the very top of the podium with a gold medal around his neck. 

Sae delved into figure skating at the age of eight, and Rin quickly followed suit. It began on a family night in, the brothers gathered around their small, worn-out television, fixated on the Winter Olympics in muted colors. Although ice skating initially served as mere background noise while their mother knitted, they both felt an undeniable pull.

Rin was only thirteen when he first won silver at his junior debut competition. In that same year, Sae also moved up to the senior-level groups and gave his first professional appearance during the Japan Figure Skating Championships. Unsurprisingly to no one, Sae effortlessly won gold, putting the whole world on notice and overtaking the competition by over 40 points. From that moment forward, Sae was recruited by an international coach and was sent aboard to different training facilities. 

It burned in Rin’s memories of all the irregular Facetime calls they would have of Sae giving him a walking tour of the cities he stayed in. New York was too loud and bright. Chongqing felt like something out of a fairytale and a cyberpunk city at the same time. Saint Petersburg was too cold but Sae liked grabbing pirozhki from a street food vendor before practice every morning. Despite being only two years older, he sometimes felt like he was worlds away from his brother’s place. 

Still, after everything, Rin looks up to him. It doesn’t bother Rin that he’s always ‘second best’—according to those poorly written sports magazines—because this is something they can bond over, something that only they can understand.

And maybe this is Rin’s motivation to eventually surpass him.

Unfortunately, it doesn’t go exactly how he imagines it. 

“You’re going to sub in for me.” 

Sae is sitting up on his bed, his right leg bandaged tightly all the way up to his knee, and he’s saying this with his usual straight-laced expression. Their mother has always complained about being unable to read Sae’s emotions and Rin always thought it was pretty amusing growing up. But now, he finally understands what his mother was talking about.

Rin straightens his back in his seat, a colorful plastic chair from their childhood that’s now too small for a person his size, and almost drops his phone. “Did you hit your head too?”

His brother rolls his eyes and continues, “I know you’re taking a break this season but I promised one of my juniors that I would compete with them. Luckily,” and he points to his injured leg, “this isn’t a permanent issue but I think it’ll also be good for you.”

Sae’s injury happened during practice overseas at a training facility in Madrid. It’s a mild ankle and knee sprain from overexertion and stress factors from jumping too often. He was treated briefly before their parents suggested flying back to Japan to fully recover. It’s not uncommon for skaters to suffer from these types of injuries but why does Sae feel the need to bring Rin into this? 

During last year’s Grand Prix Final, Rin had barely finished in the top ten. He fumbled with his short program and free skate, failed to land his quad jumps three times, and had a sloppy step sequence, both of which were supposed to be his strong suits. That day, he didn’t bother joining his coach at the kiss and tell, ignored all the swarming paparazzi self-proclaimed journalists, and uninstalled every social media app on his phone. His fans, coaches, and his family were all concerned as to how someone like him was able to fall that low compared to his higher-than-average stats. Rin had blamed it on something he can’t even remember, maybe a stomach bug, he thinks. 

Obviously, that wasn’t the case, everyone could see right through the lie but not entirely the truth of it. News outlets flooded the market with headlines shaming him for not living up to his older brother’s standards, not being a good representative for his nation, and that it was all karma for having an ‘unbearable’ personality to work with. His coaches retired after his flimsy performance and all but two of his sponsorships dropped him. Rin hasn’t officially given out a statement regarding anything. 

Depression is a hell of a thing to deal with. Rin’s dealt with it in the past when Sae first moved aboard. Luckily, Sae is perceptive to this kind of thing. The daily calls helped, despite the harsh timezone differences, and eventually Rin was able to move past it. The reality of it though, is that depression never really fades away, it’s almost like an addiction. Sometimes it takes hold in a moment of weakness, one that Rin doesn’t even realize he has until it’s too late. Maybe it’s all the rigorous training, all the comparisons to his brother—he tries not to think too much about it.

He didn’t know when the feeling hit him or why it decided to affect him that day. 

For the past several months, he’s been spending time gliding around their local ice rink, teaching some kids on the side to keep his mind preoccupied because, if not that, then he’ll probably end up laying in his bed all day. It works and it’s at least a healthy distraction but, at the same time, he can’t shake the gnawing feeling in his chest every time someone mentions his last performance. 

Rin feels like he’s hit a wall. A thick, towering, uninviting wall. And he doesn’t know if he’s ready to face his baggage yet.

“I’m not going to do that.” He finally answers and watches as his brother’s face stays unfazed.

“I need you to.” Sae presses on. “You need to get out of whatever rut you’re in. You’re not happy and going back might help. Forget about competing in singles and join pairs.”

Sae might be talented in everything else but, like Rin, he’s bad at choosing his words and comforting. Rin knows what he means though and he can’t exactly blame him. He’s lost weight, most of it being muscle, and whenever he does get back from work, Rin holes up in his room playing horror games all night long. Rinse and repeat. 

At least there’s a level of concern and sincerity behind Sae’s tone, unlike the vulture-like glee from the tabloid reporters.

“I’m…” Rin’s throat feels heavy all of a sudden and he struggles to find an excuse. 

Instead of answering, he fixates his attention back to his phone, it’s a news article about Sae’s injury and his withdrawal from the skating season. The article also has a photo of you posing next to his brother, elbow resting on his shoulder while your other hand raises a peace sign towards the camera. Rin hasn’t heard much about you, not that he actively keeps up with any of his competitors, but Sae has mentioned your name here and there before since you both share the same coach.

From what Rin knows, you started skating around the same age as him. You won a few local competitions and managed a bronze medal in the women’s singles category during the Japan Skating Championships. Supposedly, this year you’re attempting to take a shot at qualifying for the Grand Prix Final for pairs. With Sae out of the picture, Rin really hopes the responsibility doesn’t fall on him.

The look that Sae is currently shooting at him is making him backtrack his thoughts.

“It’ll be good for you,” his brother reiterates. Sae scoots closer to the edge and plucks the phone out of Rin’s grasp. “Plus, I already told her that you would do it.”

Rin’s eyes widen. “You did what?”

Sae hums, and taps his fingers away at the screen, before handing it back to him with your contact information placed in. “She’s actually on her way over here.”

“I haven’t even—”

Sae throws a hand up. “No, you don’t get a choice, Rin.”

Despite being three years younger than Sae, you had no issues barging into his room, suitcase in hand and hair in a frenzy. Rin is still seated, having to process his brother’s ridiculous request and now having to make himself semi-presentable to you. He also eyes the suitcase because… there’s no way that you’re actually staying with them right?

“Hope the flight here wasn’t too rough,” His brother starts casually.

Your cheeks are puffed out, eyes slightly baggy from the presumably restless flight, and you let out an exasperated sigh. “I hope you know that I didn’t tell coach about any of this.”

“Any of what?” Sae asks slowly. Now Rin is internally panicking.

Your eyes fall on him and they sparkle in recognition for a brief moment before you turn your attention back to his brother. “Um, that I flew all the way from Madrid to Tokyo?”

“I thought you said he approved of it.” Sae looks visibly annoyed.

You give a sheepish shrug and try to smile. “Yeah, I might’ve lied a bit.” It looks like you can’t decide if you want to be embarrassed by this fact or want to burst into tears.

Now it’s Sae’s turn to sigh. “Well, you’re already here so there’s no point. I’ll come up with something if Ego asks.”

You’ve made yourself practically at home within the next hour. Sae had told you that you could transform their home office space into your bedroom for the next several months in preparation for the competition, much to Rin’s protests. Right now, your makeshift living space composes of a shitty air mattress that Rin had in his closet since childhood and one of Sae’s extra pillows and blankets. You still need an actual mattress and a bedframe, and Rin doesn’t know if he wants to suggest the local hardware shop down the street. Because, if he does do that, it’ll mean he’ll be accepting his fate for the next upcoming year.

“Are you guys both hungry for dinner? I can whip up something real quick!” You’re saying this as if you’ve been living with them forever. It throws Rin off but Sae is unphased by your informality. 

“Pork katsu curry sounds nice.” Sae muses from the living room couch. He’s streaming a figure skating compilation video from the previous Winter Olympics on the TV while jotting down some notes on his phone. “Why don’t you help her out, Rin?”

“Do I have to?” 

“Yeah,” and Sae lifts his eyes away from the screen to give him a knowing look. “You have to.”

Three protein shakes. A pack of half-eaten grapes. And two boxes of forgotten leftovers from god knows how long ago. There’s not much in Rin’s fridge. His parents have been traveling around the world ever since he got back and usually, Rin would just get himself takeout to save some time. When he rummages through his pantry, he almost feels embarrassed by how barren it feels. A box of cup ramen, some curry cubes, and a small bag of rice on the bottom. It would honestly be better just to order takeout than to bother cooking up something less satisfying. 

“We should—”

“Let’s go to the store!” Of course, you offer that up. Rin can feel his shoulders immediately tensing when he sees you grabbing your jacket and wallet.

Sae throws him another penetrating gaze and Rin recedes. “Give me a second.” And maybe a drink or two.

You’re the complete opposite of what Rin expected. 

Bright, bubbly, and almost downright annoying. It reminds him of how he used to act when he was younger.

The first few minutes of the walk are silent not because Rin doesn’t know what to say but because he doesn’t want to say anything. His mind drifts off to an MMO he’s been currently playing with two of his ‘friends’ that he made during his last competition — if you count only exchanging numbers for the sake of playing games and talking about nothing else. That’s what friends do, right? It’s evening and, if it weren’t for Sae and you, he could be online right now, clearing a dungeon with them. This week is a double drop event and he’s going to miss out on it because you want to buy katsu curry ingredients. 

After passing the third block in the neighborhood, you start to see a few local shops and grocery stores lined up down an alleyway. There are more locals around, some are walking their dogs, others sweeping the sides of their house entrances. You decide to take this time to finally talk to him.

“Who’s your favorite skater?” It comes out as a blurt like you’ve been holding it in.

Rin blinks. “What kind of question is that?”

“A normal one,” You pick up a small shopping cart by the entrance and make a beeline towards the produce section. “Plus it can tell you a lot about a person.”

Can it really? “You first then,” Rin tells you.

You answer without much thought, throwing a couple of apples and potatoes into the cart. “Has to be Nathan Chen! He’s super bold and flashy with his programs.” He’s heard of him before, Rin thinks he’s around the same age as his brother. 

“Yuzuru Hanyu.” He answers right after.

You make a noise, and Rin assumes it’s a good one by the way you’re smiling. “I can definitely see that, he’s really elegant when he skates.”

The two of you fall silent again but it’s a bit bearable. You finish off by buying pork, onions, and a few soft drinks before heading over to the self-checkout. Rin pays for the entirety of the grocery run since it’s mainly his fault for having an empty fridge. If he had kept up with a healthier lifestyle then maybe he wouldn’t be in this current mess.

Dinner, for all things considered, doesn’t go horribly. It’s been months since Rin has picked up a knife, let alone use his cutting board, and you’re nice enough to show him how to properly score meat. And yeah, he just learned what scoring meant outside of sports. He’s learning a lot today. 

Adding apple chunks to the curry really made an immense difference. Tastes a lot sweeter but also comforting. The pork comes out crispy and tender enough for him to easily bite through and practically melts on his tongue. Maybe he should get back into cooking soon.

Sae wipes his mouth before setting down his utensils. “I’ve also taken the liberty to coach you guys too, so don’t let me down.” 

You blink. Rin looks like he’s going to drop his fork on his plate. He seems to catch himself though, and for just a moment. Your heads both tip to the side, and there’s a strange moment of eye contact, one where you are nervously glancing at Sae, and Sae is caught in a strange back-and-forth with Rin.

Yeah, Rin is learning more today compared to the average person.

The next day at the ice rink is a surreal experience for Rin. A year ago, when he did skate professionally, he was used to practicing alone or occasionally sharing the rink with a few other skaters, but now there's a new dynamic—a pair dynamic. You and him. The thought alone sends shivers down his spine, and not the good kind.

Sae is sitting on the side, his injured leg propped up on a chair, and he's observing with a critical eye. Rin can feel the pressure, not just from the expectation of his brother, but also from the fact that you're now involved. His comfort zone has been invaded.

“Let's start with some basic warm-up moves,” Sae suggests, and Rin reluctantly nods. 

The two of you glide on the ice, trying to synchronize your movements to a random classical tune that his brother placed on shuffle. Claire de Lune—he’s warmed up to this song plenty of times before. It's awkward at first, the pacing and speed is off, and you’re both too tensed to initiate physical contact. 

“You need to trust each other,” Sae instructs, his voice echoing in the cold rink. 

Rin shoots him a dirty glare. Trust has never been his strong suit, especially not with someone new.

You decide to break the ice, quite literally, by attempting a lift. Rin braces himself as you come at him with speed, and then, in a moment that feels like slow motion, he lifts you off the ground. Success. You're now spinning in the air, and Rin is holding his breath, hoping he doesn't drop you.

“That was good, Rin!” you exclaim when you land back on the ice.

He's slightly out of breath, both from the physical exertion and the anxiety that came with it. “Yeah, great,” he mutters, avoiding eye contact.

After what seems like an eternity, Rin begins to find a rhythm. It's still not perfect, he’s not used to skinship so he can tell his grip around you is either too firm or barely there. Sae’s a rough teacher and quite possibly the king at micromanaging, the two of you bond quietly over the fact. Rin also learns that you’re pretty good at hydroblading and the Biellmann spin. Well, you’re pretty good at a lot of things. He’s surprised that you haven’t tried out for more international competitions prior.  

By the end of the day, both of you are exhausted—well, you look fine, it’s more like Rin feels like his quads are about to burn off. This is the most he’s done physically and with his career in the last several months. Sae, with his usual unreadable expression, nods approvingly.

“You’ve got potential,” he comments, and Rin is unsure if it's a compliment or just a statement of fact. “So, what’s the theme?”

Right. They need to figure out that first before deciding on anything else. Rin has always struggled with coming up with themes and settles with essentially the same one every year since he feels comfortable with it. The past years he’s played around with ‘solitude’, ‘dormant’, and ‘night’—and all of his programs contained dark, moody instrumentals that went along with it. 

You’re shuffling awkwardly by the benches, fiddling with your gym bag, and raise a hesitant hand. “How do we feel about ‘love’?”

Rin tightens his lips. “Isn’t that kind of vague?”

“Weren’t all of your themes the same?” Sae shoots back and it makes him quiet. “What songs did you have in mind?”

You’re quick to pull out your phone, a playlist pops up with songs that you’ve either wanted to skate or skated to. The song choices aren’t bad, most of them being soundtracks from musicals and pop artists.

“This Love.”

Rin lets out a loud scoff. “Guess you’re into that sappy stuff.” He remembers one of his skating colleagues was floating around the idea of skating to that song when they first jumped into a relationship but decided to shelve it once they found another person.

“It’s a good song,” You say with a huff, to which Rin only rolls his eyes.

“Guys,” Sae claps his hands three times, a signal that Rin recognizes from his earlier childhood days of basically saying ‘shut the fuck up’. “I need you to work together.”

Your index finger jabs into Rin’s ribcage. He manages to hold back every fiber in his body to not yell at you, especially not when Sae is staring right at him. “If you’re going to make a comeback, I think maybe you should get back on social media again to promote!”

“I’ll sleep on it.” He says with a clenched jaw and furrowed brow.

“We’ll see you later back home, gonna do a couple of laps around the neighborhood before we end the night.” You’re lacing up your sneakers while Sae grabs his car keys. Rin assumes his brother is just going to be ‘encouraging you’ from the driver’s seat. Classic big brother move. 

“Sure thing,” It’s the tone that says he’s decided. He’s done. End of discussion. Rin just really wants to lay in his bed right now.

As he walks home, Rin mulls over your suggestion and decides to reinstall some of his social media apps. Surprisingly enough, he still remembers his passwords (he definitely does not have the same password for everything, nope) and immediately logs onto Instagram, fighting back the weird twists and turns in his stomach as the app slowly loads.

There are maybe over a hundred notifications in his DMs, most of which are from random strangers giving half-assed ‘advice’ on how he can be a better skater and some messages from people he’s skated against asking how he was doing. He starts from the bottom of his inbox and recognizes a few of their usernames.

itsyoiboi — sent ten months ago are you doing alright? let me know if you need anything

hyo.chigiri — sent nine months ago Just checking up on you. Coach told me that you left.

megugu_skates— sent nine months ago (。┰ω┰。) rinrinrin!!  dont tell me ur quitting for good?? =͟͟͞͞ =͟͟͞͞ ﾍ ( ´ Д `)ﾉ (⋟﹏⋞) u have to come back!!

baroushouei — sent eight months ago Hey, get your head out of your ass. We’re all worried about you.

Ignore. Ignore. Ignore. Rin semi-appericates the sentiment but he didn’t ask for it. He doesn’t need any of them checking up on him for the sake of it. None of them were ever close to him so why bother?

He eventually reaches back to the top of his inbox. What Rin didn’t expect was to see a message from you.

yn.is.here — sent a week ago um  hi there!! sorry we haven’t officially met before but your brother said you’ll be able to help me compete in skate pairs?? he told me that you’re thinking about coming back this season.  sorry if this comes off as weird!

Ugh, of course, his brother would plan this whole thing behind his back. It doesn’t surprise him, and it explains why any of this is happening. 

When he finally gets back home, he kicks off his shoes and heads straight to his bedroom. Rin plops and eases his back into the mattress, thumb rummaging through his photo album and trying to find a dumb professional photo to post on his page for stupid promotion purposes. He’s about to pick out an old photo from nearly two years ago when your text notification pops up. You sent over ten attachments—guess Sae took photos and videos from today’s practice run.

Rin shifts through the options before settling on a photo with the two of you in it. You’re both gliding side by side, hands barely touching. He looks scruffy, well he looks scruffy in all of them, the smile he tried to make came out more like a scowl, while you look like a complete natural—what’s new? On top of his skating, Rin needs to work on smiling and his skincare routine next.

Rin uploads the picture with a simple caption, ‘im back’, and turns off his notifications. He’ll worry about the lousy reporters tomorrow morning.

[DISCUSSION THREAD] Rin Itoshi's Icy Resurgence, Unraveling the Mystery Girl, and the Journey Without His Brother by [MOD] Dooby

In the world of figure skating, Rin Itoshi is no stranger to both triumphs and challenges. The seasoned skater, known for his graceful performances and technical prowess, recently made headlines by returning to the ice after a brief hiatus. Taking the place of his brother in the figure skating pairs category, Rin has partnered with the talented and rising star, Y/N, to form an unexpected yet promising duo.

[yurio.fan.cl0b] - 17 minutes ago he’s going to make an embarrassment out of himself AGAIN just go back into hiding  [VICChan] - 15 minutes ago Lololol he thinks that piggybacking off another skater it’ll guarantee a gold medal lolol who is even y/n anyway… never heard of her???? [porkkatsu] - 14 minutes ago shes a nobody just like rin *shrugs*  [ISAGINUMBERONE] - 12 minutes ago ^ been a rin itoshi fan since day one — i believe that he’ll make a great comeback!! rin if you’re reading this please ignore the haters!  [itsJJStyleX0X0] - 9 minutes ago are you actually an idiot? there’s no way that they’re going to take gold, not at the level he’s currently at. compared to his brother, rin’s past performance was sloppy and weak. if he’s going to win gold then he’ll probably end up doping himself [SaeItoshisWIFE] - 7 minutes ago Can we please refrain from spreading rumors like this? Doping is a serious accusation to make…

next rink!

a/n: ok... i meant to keep this in my drafts until i finish it but then i realized it would've been like... way too long with the number of scenes i wanted to write.... so here's some content until the next part bleh >:(( i need to fixate on one project at a time but at the same time i love sharing stuff w you guys haha

#blue lock #bllk #blue lock imagines #bllk x reader #blue lock x reader #itoshi rin #rin itoshi #itoshi rin x reader #rin itoshi x reader #blue lock x female reader #heavily inspired by yuri on ice duh #rin is katsuki yuri here (kinda) #also posted during the grand prix figure skating comp!! #cw: depression #cw: mental health

[sorryjustafangirl]

babe for the weekend

a/n: this is a little different than what i usually write, in terms of boy and structure but i am really really proud of how it turned out, so i hope y'all like it too! the title comes from Taylor Swift's ''tis the damn season" and it quite inspired by it. this is for @broadstbroskis, one of the very first writers i starting following on hockeyblr. it was an absolute honour to write for her in @antoinerousselssel's winter fic exchange and i really really hope she enjoys it (and all its Swiftie references <3)

pairing: morgan rielly x fem!reader

word count: 8.8k+

warnings: a few swears, holiday setting (although not crazy prominent), childhood idiot friends to lovers?

disclaimer: this is a piece of fiction and this beautiful gif is not mine! p.s. i know he got engaged recently (to the figure skating love of my life Tessa Virtue; congrats to them!) but i was too deep in the fic to switch it when i heard the news. hope you still love it!

Morgan had been getting you out of trouble since the day you two could walk. You’d knock over a vase, and he’d find a way to blame the dog. You’d convince him to mattress surf down the stairs, and he put it back while you stalled your mom so she wouldn’t know. He would tell his mom that she “saw you walk up the stairs after dinner like hours ago” when you only snuck in his window four minutes before. 

That didn’t end when he left to play junior hockey or when he got drafted and you moved across the country for school. Despite being in the same city, you relied less on him to bail you out as you got older, but every once in a while, his number was on speed dial to decipher if a guy was phishing you or for a 2am pickup from the club. 

Granted, you’d saved him just as many times. You’d posed as his girlfriend to save him from puck bunnies and more than once told his mom it was you he was out with, instead of the girlfriend he wasn’t supposed to have. Every other week, he’d call with a question he was too embarrassed to ask his own mom (“is $10 too much for a carton of orange juice?”). 

You just never thought he’d be bailing you out like this. 

As the youngest of four kids (and the last single one), your parents were overbearing about your love life to say the least. But in the holiday season? It dialed up to 11. 

“Are you sure you’re alright though? We don’t want you to be feeling lonely.” Your mom brought up at the end of your weekly Zoom family call, complete with all your siblings and grandma. 

“For the last time, I am not lonely. I have great friends, I have a good job at an ad agency, and my credit card is paid off. I’m doing great!”

“But it’s a big city, darling. You’ve been out of school for years and you still haven’t told us about any guy. Or-or girl, if you’re into that,” she tried to reason.

“Mom, she isn’t lonely because she’s getting some!” Ben, your youngest brother, chimed in, making you cringe. 

“Grow up, dork,” Julie, your eldest sister, said at the same time your older brother, James, said “Nice one!”

“Kids, you’re making Grams blush, can you knock it off?” Your dad chimed in. Ben’s face flushed but that didn’t stop James from poking the bear. 

“Just think Mom, there’s less people to feed at Christmas!” 

“That’s what you take out of this? Your sister could be at risk for depression.”

“I don’t have depression!”

“You always talk to me with an iced coffee, I do get a little concerned.” “Rude!” “Hey! Ruby drinks iced coffees too and she’s not depressed.” “She’s in a relationship with you, I’d rethink that.” “You aren’t depressed when you’re in happy relationships, that’s what I know.” “Grams, that is not true.” “That’s what Cynthia at book club said!” “None of that changes the fact that your sister hasn’t had a boyfriend in a long time and I’m worried about her!” “She’s not that old Brenda.” “She’s not seventeen anymore Thomas, our daughter is getting older and if she wants kids–” “Kids? Mom, she doesn’t even have a boyfriend.” “That’s my point!” “Who said she wants kids?” “Julie, you’re a mother, you should know every woman wants kids!” “Grams, that isn’t true.” 

All of their overlapping voices seemed to get louder, rattling around in your brain, and you couldn’t take it anymore. 

“I have a boyfriend!” You blurted and the screen silenced. You relished the small moment of quiet before the sound exploded again. 

“What?” “Yes!” “Who is he?” “Is he coming home with you?” “What’s his name?”

“Woah, woah. One at a time please,” you nervously laughed. 

“What’s his name?” The smiles on your mom and Grams faces were so wide it was starting to freak you out and your brain froze. What’s a boy’s name what’s a boy name what’s a boy’s name??

“Morgan.” 

Your brain blurted out the name before you realized its implications. 

“Morgan?” Your mom’s smile widened. “Like our Morgan? The Rielly’s boy?” 

Shit, shit, shit. “You’ll have to wait to find out.”

“If they couldn’t get together in high school, no way it would happen now. I say it’s different.” “There’s lots of Morgans in Toronto! It’s a big city.” 

“Yeah, I call bullshit on this whole boyfriend thing,” your older sister Julie chimed in.

You felt blood starting to drain from your face “What?” 

“Oh c’mon! All we have is a name? You don’t want to share his job or what he looks like? You can’t even tell us if he’s coming back with you. You’re just faking it.”

“His work is busy, we haven’t decided if he’s coming back yet!”

“Two weeks before the holidays?” She raised an eyebrow and you pursed your lips. 

“Fine. I was going to surprise you instead, but yes he’s coming back with me. And he has blond hair. Happy?” Julie only shrugged but you could hear your grandmother rejoice in the background of the call. “Look, I have to go but I’ll see you all in two weeks.”

“With Morgan! Oh, I’m so excited to meet him!”

“Yes. With Morgan.” You ended the phone call and flopped into your couch pillows before letting out a scream. 

Where were you going to find a Morgan with blond hair to act as a fake-boyfriend to meet your family across the country?  

-----

“Just call your Morgan.” Your best friend, Ivy, said as the two of you sat in Fran’s, the best diner for burger and fries past Jarvis street, for your regular lunch chat.  

“No, it’d be weird! He’s known my family for a long time and we’re friends.” You shook your head while munching on your fries. 

“Those are exactly the reasons you should take him! Plus, you said his name. I don’t get why you’re making it into this big deal about taking him.” 

“Because it is!”

“But why? It’s not like you’re in love with him,” She said, dipping her fries in ketchup. 

“About that…” You trailed off, biting your lip waiting for her reaction. 

She dropped the food before it could get to her mouth. “No!”

“Look, it was when we were in high school! I was about to tell him when we moved out here, but then he was saying how there was so much on his plate and he was feeling a lot of pressure and I just didn’t want to add to that, you know?” You took a bite of your food before continuing. “I didn’t want him to resent me for telling him at such a crucial point in his life.” 

“And now?”

You shrugged. “I think I’ll always have some sort of feelings for him. He was my best friend growing up.”

“You’re going to have to be really good at hiding those feelings when you’re posing as boyfriend and girlfriend with him.”

“Who said I’m asking him?”

Ivy raised her eyebrows. “Where else are you going to find a blond-haired Morgan to bring home to your family across the country in less than two weeks?” You threw a fry at her, which she grabbed and put on her own plate. “Besides, there’s no harm in asking. He can always say no.”

-----

“Yes.”

“Really?” You asked a little too loudly, putting your coffee mug down a little too harshly, gaining the attention of others in the cafe the two of you routinely catch up in. But you didn’t care. You were expecting a little more skepticism from Morgan when you proposed him playing a fake boyfriend role in front of your family. 

“Yeah, ‘course. It’s my job to bail you out of trouble, isn’t it?” You playfully kicked him under the table. “Besides, I haven’t seen Vancouver or your family in a while. It’d be nice to go back to the old times.” 

“Oh my gosh, thank you, thank you, thank you!” You said, instinctively placing a hand on his arm laid across the table. “Okay, so I don’t know when your season ends but I’m hoping we can fly out for like three days maximum, so it’ll be quick, and we can use your job as an excuse so that’ll be good. For the story, obviously we just went out one day after being friends for a long time, so that’ll be easy. You asked me out. Five or six months is a good timeline for them not knowing but also you coming home so let’s stick to that. You can’t tell your parents because my mom will be furious if Shirley knew before her. Um, Ben, my little brother – you know him–, he’s bringing his girlfriend Ruby, but she’s chill so you’ll get along with her a lot. Drew, my oldest nephew, he’s Julie’s kid and then Charlie and Julie had Rebekah the year before last and Izzy, who is James’s wife, just had baby Taylor a couple months ago so the house is going to be chaotic. You should be writing this down, you know.” You slowed down to notice that Morgan was just staring at you. “I just said so much stuff you need to remember.”

“I know your family. Trust me, it’s going to be fine. I’ll remember all that,” He assured you, placing a hand over your arm like you had done to him.

“Are you sure? I just..I can’t have this go wrong. Julie already suspects the legitimacy of this…fake relationship.”

He squeezes your arm and sends you one of his smiles that makes your heart swell. “We’ve got this in the bag.”

-----

You’d both decided that it’d be easiest if you came to the airport together, so you said you’d pick him up from morning practice. You were waiting in the parking garage at the arena, scrolling through your phone, until you heard footsteps. Looking up, you see Morgan, Mitch, and Willy walking towards you. You give them a shy wave, and they all return with big grins, like they knew something they didn’t. Morgan came up to you, swung an arm over your shoulder and pressed a kiss to your temple. 

“Bye guys, safe travels,” He shouted over his shoulder, the two of you walking towards your vehicle. Once they were out of earshot, you turned to Morgan.

“What was that?” 

“What?”

“That forehead kiss!”

“Oh!” His smile grew a little. “I was practicing for this weekend. Was it okay?” His slight concern made your heart beat faster and you could feel heat starting to go to your face. 

“I mean, yeah, but like won’t the guys think that, you know, we’re—” 

“Believe me, the guys already think we’re together.”

“What?!”

He laughed. “They asked about my plans for the holidays and I said I was going home with you. They just assumed we were dating and it felt like a lot of work to correct them. It’s okay, I promise.”

“If you say so,” you hummed. You unlatched yourself from his arm as you approached your car but Morgan stopped in his tracks and started to laugh. 

“You’re still driving this old thing?” He was referring to your blue Honda you’d had since high school. 

“Excuse me, you named this thing and Louise is still in great shape so of course I still drive her. Now get in.” He holds up his hands in surrender. You buckled yourself in and turned the engine over. The dash lit up like a Christmas tree and the radio was uneven again, so you hit the console a few times before it started to come out of both speakers. 

“Great shape, sure.”

“Shut up.” 

-----

Despite the busyness of the Toronto Pearson International Airport during the holidays, the two of you seemed to breeze through security and boarding. It wasn’t until you stepped onto the airplane, you’d realized just how much anxiety you got from flying. 

Morgan offered to put both carry-on bags in the overhead bins and you gladly took him up the offer. You slid into your seat, immediately putting on the seatbelt and making it tight against your hips. 

“We aren’t flying just yet,” He teased, sliding into the seat next to you.

“I know, it’s just that I–nevermind, it’s silly.” You murmured with a strained smile. 

“No, what is it?” You met your eyes and you took a deep breath. This was Morgan, your Morgan. He’d seen you cry after you got root beer up your nose and he only laughed a little. 

“Airplanes give me a lot of anxiety and I hate takeoffs. It’s just really nerve wracking for me.” 

“Okay, well I’m right here. Would it help if I held your hand?” You shyly nodded, and Mo grabbed a hold of your hand, lacing your fingers together and rubbing his thumb over the back of your hand. You tried to take deep breaths but after the safety presentation, and the plane started to taxi, it got shallower and the grip on Morgan’s hand got stronger.

“I think it's time for a distraction. Want to help me out here?” He said, turning his body towards yours as much as he could. You nodded, trying not to focus on the bouncing of the wings outside your window. 

“What kind of pet names do you like?”

That was…not what you were expecting but it certainly is a distraction. “I don’t really know? I didn’t name our dogs, Julie or my parents did. Why?” You look over to Morgan to see him quietly laughing to himself. “What?” 

“I meant like, romantic pet names. So I can play this boyfriend role right, you know?”

“Oh,” you said, feeling your face heat up. “Uh, I don’t really know. My past boyfriends weren’t really into those.” You continued to take deep breaths as he pulled out his phone. 

“Okay, cool, I’ve got a list and we can just go through them?” You nodded and he started. 

“Honey?”

“We aren’t fifty years old Mo.”

“Sweetie?”

“I’m not five either,” you joked. At your attempt at humour, you say Morgan’s face lit up. 

“What about sweetheart?” Your grimace made him laugh and he moved on. “Kitten? Dear? Babe? Sugar plum?”

“You can call me babe. For the weekend, of course. I like that one.” 

“Of course, babe.” He winked. “And look, we’re in the air already. That wasn’t so bad, was it?”

You looked out and the clouds were level, the city skyline peeking through like a scene out of a movie. You look back at him to see him already looking at you. Unable to say everything you feel for him in that moment (platonically, you tell yourself), you squeeze his hand. 

-----

As you touched back in Vancouver (still holding Morgan’s hand for safety purposes), it started to feel real. Real you were back in the city, real Morgan was here, and real that you were supposed to be acting like you’re in love. 

“Hey, I’ll be right back. Hold my bag for me?” Morgan asked, once you’d deplaned and entered the airport. You nodded and shooed him off, finding a place in the nearest lounge to wait for him. You pulled out your phone and started to catch up on messages when someone beside you cleared their throat.

“Sorry to bother you but did you go to Prince of Wales Secondary School in Vancouver?” You turned towards the voice to see someone so familiar but couldn’t put a finger on who.

“Um, yes. How did you know that?”

“I’m Abigail Brown. I think you were my lab partner in high school chemistry?” As soon as she said it, it was like everything rushed back to you. The two of you were good friends but just fell out of touch as years went on. 

“Oh my gosh yes! Oh my gosh, hi! How have you been?” You got out of your seat to give her a hug. 

“I’ve been really good! My girlfriend and I are headed to London for the holidays.”

“Oh fun! I’ve come back for the holidays with my uh..” You trailed off, thinking of what to call this arrangement. “Morgan Reilly, do you remember him?”

“Yeah, totally. Did he come back with you?” She asked, raising her eyebrows. 

“Yeah, we’re here together.”

“No way, that’s so sweet! Back in the day, everyone was wondering when you two would get together!”

“Oh, really?” You asked, surprised. You had thought that your crush on one of your closest friends was pretty discrete. 

“Yeah, a lot of us thought you’d be a cute couple. Turns out we were right,” she winked and nodded her head behind you. You turned to see Morgan coming back with two Tim Horton cups in his hands – one hot coffee for him and one Iced Capp for you. You tilted your head at his thoughtfulness. 

“My flight is boarding now, but it was so nice to see you again!” Abigail said, waving briefly to Morgan before leaving with her girlfriend. 

“Yeah, you too!” You called after her. “Is that coffee for me?” You asked, a wide smile on your face. 

“Because it is so ridiculously early, it is,” he said, placing it in your hands. “Who was that?”

“My high school lab partner. She thought we were together, actually.”

Morgan gave you a puzzled look. “Isn’t that what she’s supposed to think?”

“I mean, I guess, but we’re really just pretending for my family, so I didn’t think she’d think we’re together.” Morgan only hummed at your response and grabbed his bag. 

“Ready to head to your parents' then?” 

Like coming home, the two of you navigated through the airport easily and were on your way to your parents house in no time. Outside of the Uber, looking up at your childhood home, you felt your nerves getting the best of you again. The warm Christmas lights and the three cars in the driveway should’ve calmed you down, but instead had the opposite effect.

“Okay, so, again, we’ve been dating for five months, you asked me out. We kept it a secret, so your parents don’t know either. Ruby is Ben’s girlfriend. Drew and–”

“–Rebekah are Julie and Charlie’s kids. Rebekah is two years old. James married Izzy and their baby, Taylor, was born last month,” He finished with a smile. “Told ya I’d remember it. It’s going to be fine, let’s just go see your family?” He held out his hand for you to take and you cautiously placed it in his. He tugged you up to the front door, wrapping his arm around your shoulders to ring the doorbell. He left it over your shoulder and leaned down to whisper in your ear. 

“Trust me, we’ve got this.” He pressed a quick kiss to your cheek but before you could process what he was playing at, your mom had opened the front door.

“Oh, it is our Morgan! Thomas, I told you it was going to be him! Oh, come in, come in,” she ushered you in and your family all appeared, saying their hellos, taking your bags up to your room, placing drinks in your hands and leading you both into the living room. You settled in beside Morgan, your thighs touching each other as he reached over to entangle your hand with his.

“So, Morgan, my daughter hasn’t told us anything yet! How long have you been together?” Your mom said, once everyone was back together and catching up with the two of you. 

“Couldn’t have been too recent if you brought him home with you,” Julie said, her skepticism showing through. 

“Can’t be too long either since she never told us about him!” James said, nudging her.

Before you could get a word in and defend yourselves, Morgan spoke up. “We started dating five months ago. Might seem a little fast to come home for Christmas but I remember your family pretty well from when I was little. Plus, the schedule lined up really nicely this year so we figured, why not? But we decided to keep it to ourselves for the first little bit, with my job and everything. It can be a really hard adjustment. Especially with the media, I didn’t want them to freak her out.” 

“Aw, how sweet of you.” 

“Who asked who out?” Ruby said, curled up next to her boyfriend. 

“She asked me.” Your heart stopped as Morgan deviated from the plan you’d created. “It was nice, though, so I didn’t have to rack up the courage to ask her the same thing.” He turned towards you, meeting your eyes. To your family, you were recounting your first date and how you’ve been in love since. But Morgan was trying to get away with changing the story and you were civilly throwing daggers at him. 

“That’s nice. But you’ve got to get dressed, we’re still going cross country skiing this afternoon.” Julie said, standing up. 

“Why?” you whined. “We’re tired from traveling.”

“Then exercise will be good for you. And it’s tradition, you can’t deprive Morgan of that.” The smile she sent you was fake and you could tell, narrowing your eyes at her. 

“Yeah, babe, don’t deprive me from family traditions,” he commented, earning a small poke to his side, but you nodded, going to find your warm clothes. 

-----

Cypress Mountain was where your family always skied on Christmas Eve. It was a tradition passed on from your grandfather, who’d done it with his father, and your family liked to keep it alive. It was a thirty minute drive, forty five in Vancouver traffic, so your head fell to Morgan’s shoulder. Soon enough, he was shaking you awake.

“We’re here, sleeping beauty,” He said softly, unbuckling your seatbelt. “Ready?”

“The better question is if you’re ready. I’ve been doing this for years,” you laughed, getting out of the car and walking towards the lodge to get Morgan skis. 

“Please, I’m an athlete. I’ll be fantastic.” He grabbed your hand and your heart started to beat faster at the cute gesture, only to notice some of your family behind you, watching the two of you. Of course, it was only for show. What else would be for? You reminded yourself. 

Twenty minutes later, and you were still watching Mo struggle to clip his skis in, trying not to laugh when he fell over. 

“‘I’m an athlete, I’ll be fantastic’” you said, mocking him and he pouted. You unclipped your own skis and held your hands out to help him get up. 

“The key is this little latch here,” you said, guiding his foot into the ski. You did the same with the other before getting yourself ready. 

“Where would I be without you?” He said, as the two of you, slowly, moved to the track. 

“Probably still be on the ground,” you said with a cheeky smile. You knocked his poles with yours. “Want to go this way? It’s easier than the track they’re doing,” you said, referring to the rest of your family. 

He looked up at the hill your family, including your little nephew, were already halfway up and shook his head. 

“If this is a family tradition, and I’m supposed to be part of your family, I should do it with them. We can join them, I’ll be okay.” 

Morgan was right, for the most part. He got the hang of it pretty quickly, and soon enough you were both caught up to your family. He was smiling, and talking with your dad and brothers. You had time to catch up with Ruby and Charlie, who you never really saw in the family Zoom chats. 

Until you rounded the corner and saw Morgan standing to the side. You didn’t understand why until you saw what was ahead – the hills. For your family, including daredevil Drew, it was easy. But for a beginner like Morgan? You understood why he stopped. 

“If you want to turn back now, it’s okay. They’ll understand.” 

He shook his head again. “I’ve got to sell this boyfriend thing, don’t I? Just…can you go first?” You nodded and made your way down, gaining some speed before slowing down and stopping at the base to watch him. 

“You’ve got this, Mo, just do it!” You told him. He nodded at your words and came down slowly, mimicking the way you had just conquered the hill. His eyes were determined, the way you saw he was on the ice, and your smile got wider as he made it down successfully.

“Yes! You did it!”

That was, until he caught an edge and very ungracefully tumbled to the ground. 

“Well, you mostly did it. I thought you were supposed to be coordinated!” You said in a joking manner, maneuvering over to where he was trying to get up. 

“I don’t usually have these long things attached to my feet!” After his attempts, he held his hands out and you helped him stand upright again. 

“Are you okay? It looked like you fell pretty hard.” 

“My ego is bruised more than anything,” He mumbled. 

“Why? None of them saw your wipeout.” You nodded towards your family who were all ahead and had no idea of what had happened.

“But you did.”

“It’s not like you have to impress me,” You said, waving it off and starting to move along the trail. He only huffed, settling into pace beside you. 

-----

After making it back to the lodge in one piece, you all traveled back to your parent’s and sat down for a family dinner, albeit quick, as the kids’ bedtime was long ago. You helped your mom with the dishes while Morgan had “bonding time”, as he called it, with your brothers and Dad. 

“I’m glad you brought Morgan home, sweetheart,” she said, breaking through the quiet sounds of washing dishes. “He’s a catch and you seem really happy with him.”

You blushed, involuntarily, and nodded. “I am really happy when I’m with him.”

There were sounds of protests and laughter, so you peeked your head around to see Ben on the couch leaning over Morgan’s lap to ruffle James’ hair, only to get caught by Morgan in a loose headlock. Your dad was laughing at their antics and you joined him. It was nice to see Morgan be so carefree, especially with the stress of the season. 

“Hey!” Ben got your attention. “Your boyfriend is bullying me, tell him to stop!” 

“Maybe you deserved it,” You said, moving to be behind the couch. “Morgan is usually right.”

Morgan looked at you and only let Ben free once you gave me a small nod. You leaned down over the couch, wrapping your arms around his chest. At the slight display of affection, James gagged but thankfully, Izzy came down and whisked away her husband. Ben left shortly after that and you noticed Morgan’s head starting to drop. 

“Okay, we’re still on Toronto time a little bit,” You checked with Morgan, who was nodding along. “So we’re going to hit the hay, but Mom, I didn’t see the spare blankets for the pull-out couch?”

“Oh, you don’t need them, Ben has them.”

“What?” You asked, removing your hands from Morgan so he couldn’t tell how clammy they suddenly got. “Where’s Morgan going to sleep?”

“In your bed. It’ll be better for his back.” She answered. 

“Where am I going to sleep?” 

“In your bed.” She sighed when she saw the shock on your face. “Look, we trust Morgan. Besides, it’s a big bed and your dad and I aren’t under the impression you haven’t already slept together.” Her bluntness made you choke on your breath and Morgan patted your back, answering for you.

“Thank you Brenda. We'll be good, I promise.” 

“I know you will. And if you aren’t, know I’m not above telling your mother,” She said with a smirk. “Now, goodnight.” 

You both said your goodnights, and headed up to your room. Morgan shut the door behind you and you immediately started apologizing. 

“I’m sorry, I was certain she’d send one of us to the basement. She never let Charlie or Izzy sleep in the same room with my siblings until they were married,” you said, rummaging through your suitcase for pajamas. 

He waved you off and took a look around your room. It hadn’t changed much since high school, your parents leaving it unchanged for when you came back. The photos in the frames and on the walls were faded and each childhood trophy and trinket was covered in a small layer of dust – not enough for it to be untouched, but enough for it to be preserved. 

The sound of you digging through the closet for extra pillows broke him away from your walls. There were two blankets spread out on the floor and you dropped the pillows you’d found on the space above them.

“What are you doing?”

“Getting ready for bed,” You answered. “You can get changed in the bathroom.”

“Why aren’t you in the bed?” 

“Because you’re sleeping on the bed, hotshot. Can you please get changed, I want to sleep.” He huffed but nodded, slipping out of the room. When he came back to see you curled up on the floor beside the queen sized bed, he let out a small sigh and moved towards you. 

“I’m not going to let you sleep on the floor. Please come sleep on the bed?” He said, standing over top of you.

“I…I don’t want it to be weird.” You said, suddenly interested in the fraying fibres of your blanket. 

“It’s not going to be weird. I promise. Please?” You turned to see him with his puppy-dog eyes and you started to break.

“I don’t know Mo…”

“I’d feel better if you slept in the bed, babe, please? For me?” At that, you relented, nodding your head. He helped you up, gathering the blankets from the floor and laying them over you in the bed. 

He slipped in beside you, a large margin of space between the two of you. It was silent as you got comfy and you turned off your side table light. Morgan hadn’t followed your lead, so you looked over to see him looking at his side table. 

“Remember when we took this picture?” Morgan said, pointing to the only frame on the table. You didn’t even have to look at the photo to know which one he was referring to. It was the last day he spent in Vancouver before the draft and it was a few days before your graduation date. You’d taken your car to the North Shore and hiked to Lighthouse Park. The serenity of being able to see far into the ocean and see the downtown skyline was the place both of you had gone to clear your mind. You’d taken a silly selfie together but it was the one physical memento of your last time together in Vancouver. It was when you almost confessed your feelings to him. 

“Of course I do. It was a good day.”

“Do you think about it a lot?” He asked, and you turned your body to face him. 

“I mean, sometimes, yeah. Do you think about it a lot?”

He nodded, his eyes fixated on the picture. “Yeah. Reminds me of when life seemed normal.” 

You stayed silent for a few moments, watching his eyes begin to get hazy looking at the picture. “Are you okay, Mo?”  

He just nodded curtly, and turned off the light. “Goodnight.” 

You couldn’t lie and say his behaviour didn’t feel like a thousand cuts to your heart but you said goodnight before turning to face away from him, like he’d done to you. 

-----

The sun shining in from the window woke you up in the morning. You started to stir, stretching your arms and legs, but stopped when you felt arms around you. You slowly turned your head to see Morgan close to you, his arms wrapped around your waist. Sometime during the night, he must’ve moved to start cuddling you. You thought it should feel weird, being so close to your friend like this, but all you felt was a sense of calm. Being hyper aware of his arms, you shifted slightly to face him. 

You took the opportunity to look at him, really look at him. Not on the TV, through his hockey gear, not in the cafe when he was conscious that anyone could recognize him, but when he was just him. The sun was shining on him, giving his skin that soft golden glow. The lines on his forehead were almost nonexistent and his beard was filling out nicely. He looked so peaceful here, like he wasn’t one of Toronto’s biggest stars. You looked at him, your face softening as he started to stir under your gaze.

“Morning sleeping beauty,” you teased in a quiet voice, the same way he’d done to you yesterday. 

“Hmm, what time is it?” His voice was raspy and it took everything in yourself not to kiss him right there.

“Early,” you answered and he hummed in response. He slowly opened his eyes and must’ve noticed how close he was to you because his eyes got increasingly wider. His eyes met yours and when he didn’t see any panic or disgust in them, he relaxed, a small smile coming onto his face. 

“Morning babe,” He said, pulling you a little closer to him. 

“Nobody’s around, you don’t have to call me that.”

“What if I want to?” 

You looked up at him, eyes wide in shock and your lips parted. What did he say? It might have been a shock to your brain, but your body seemed to long for a closeness to him. Your heart wasn’t beating faster, no, it seemed to slow down, as if the idea of a relationship with him was the only thing to calm you. 

You noticed his eyes glancing down at your lips and you swallowed. Was he…what was he doing? He started to lean his head towards you and you felt yourself leaning in as well. He was close enough you could feel his breath hot on your face and see the grey flicks in his eyes. You started to close your eyes, his hand caressing your waist from under the covers, and —

“Auntie, Auntie! He came! Santa came! You have to get up! Come see!” Drew yelled through the door, pounding away as if you didn’t hear him. You broke away from Morgan, the small bubble popped by your nephew.  

“We’ll be right there Drew!” you yelled back, rubbing your forehead and getting out of bed. You left Morgan in bed, running downstairs to start some coffee, desperately needing to clear your head. What just happened? 

“Morning, sweetheart!” You sighed as your mom walked into the room, too chipper for how early it was. “I’ve got the pajamas for you and Morgan.”

“Morgan too?” It was a tradition to dress in matching pajamas on Christmas morning but you didn’t think it was something your parents would enforce for him. 

“Yup. Go get changed, I want to take photos soon.” She placed the two pajama sets in your arms and you trudged upstairs. You figured Mo was still laying in bed so you didn’t knock, just charged right in. Maybe you should’ve knocked. But then you wouldn’t get to see Morgan shirtless. Your brain short-circuited until you saw him looking back at you and you shut your eyes.

“I’m sorry, I forgot to knock! My mom wanted me to give you these. Matching pajamas and photos before gifts is a family tradition.” You tried to pull out his pair with your eyes closed but Mo just laughed when he saw you struggling. He came closer, his distinctive cologne invading your senses. He took one of the pairs, hopefully his size, from your arms.

“You can open your eyes, it’s okay.” You slowly opened one eye to test the waters, to see he was still without a shirt. You stared at him as long as it is socially acceptable to look at your best friend shirtless, before rushing out of the room to get changed yourself. 

You beat Morgan downstairs, and got started on the coffees. After buying him many hungover wake-up coffees, you knew his order by heart. You brought them out to the table, your sister and her family having their portrait taken in front of the tree. 

Mo came up from behind you, wrapping his arms around you and taking a whiff of your coffee. He recoiled at the hint of chocolate. 

“Yours has vanilla creamer, don’t worry,” you told him, taking a sip while watching Taylor get her first family photo in front of the tree. It was so nice to see the smiles across your family’s faces as you had this tradition. When it became Ben and Ruby’s turn, you noticed Drew starting to get a little antsy, his eyes fixated on the big box with his name on it. 

“Okay, sweetheart, yours and Morgan’s turn,” your mom said, clearing the area for you two to sit. 

“Oh, Mom, Drew’s looking a little antsy. We can skip ours–”

“No!” Mo interrupted you, taking one last sip of his coffee before tugging you along to sit in front of the tree. You gave him a look and smiled shyly. “It’s our first Christmas together. I want a picture. Please?” 

“Well, since you asked so nicely.” You turned to the camera, plastering a smile on. You were pretty close to him, your legs touching and his arm around your shoulders. Near the end,  Morgan pressed a kiss to your cheek and you blushed, the sound of the camera clicking long forgotten as you stared into his eyes. 

“Auntie, can I please please open my presents from Santa now?” Drew said, once again interrupting the moment between you and Morgan.

“Of course, baby, but you have to open the ones from me and Morgan next, deal?” He shrieked and scrambled over to the boxes, ripping into his wrapping paper. You stood up, grabbing your coffee before watching your nephew and niece on Christmas morning.

“Look at how cute you two are together,” She said, tilting the camera towards you. The first one was a cute photo. Morgan had his lips pressed against your cheek and your face was scrunched up in joy. She switched it to the next one, where the two of you were looking into each other’s eyes. He had the softest, earnest smile on his face. “I swear, I haven’t seen any people so in love since Ben met Ruby. I’m so glad you brought him home.” 

“Thanks, Mom.” You put on the best fake-smile you could, and turned back to the kids, trying not to think about how they two of you did look in love. But it wasn’t real and your stomach sunk. You took a seat on the couch, talking to Rebekah about her new doll and watching Drew drive his toy cars across the coffee table. 

“Who are these from?” you dad asked, holding up some small packages wrapped in blue paper.

“Oh, those are from me sir.” Morgan spoke up from behind you, moving to sit beside you. “There should be one for everyone.” Your dad nodded and handed them out to everyone while you turned to your fake-boyfriend. 

“Mo, I told you you didn’t have to bring anything,” you said, eyeing everyone tearing into their small gifts. 

“Now what kind of boyfriend would I be if I didn’t?” He winked at you, before turning to see their reactions. You were glad you’d turned too.

Everyone was holding up a different variety of a Toronto Maple Leafs keychain. Ben held one with a bottle opener on it and Drew held one that had skate on it. Some of them had the shape of Ontario with them or a special spinny part in the middle.

“You’re really banking on us liking you, eh?” Julie said, holding up her Rielly jersey keychain. 

“I’m planning on sticking around for a while. I figure you’ll be fans sooner or later,” he laughed off your sister’s hazing and assured your parents it was the least he could do. He turned to you. “And I didn’t forget you either.”

“What? No. Babe, I thought we were doing gifts back in Toronto?” If you’d known, you would’ve gotten him something, but he seemed unfazed. He brought out a medium box and placed it in your lap.  

“Are you sure? I didn’t bring anything for you,” you whispered to him. He just nodded and told you to open it. You ripped into the wrapping paper, opened the box, and tore out the tissue paper only to stop.

“You didn’t.” 

“I did,” He said, his face growing. “Bring it out, let’s see it.”

You lifted out of the box a dark wash denim jacket, the same one you’d been trying to rationalize buying for the past three months. It was your size and you couldn’t help but run your fingers over the seams, tracing the buttons. 

“Check the inside,” Morgan said, leaning over your shoulder. You turned your head to see him slightly blushing, and you turned to the jacket’s inside as quickly as you could. Inside there was a small label stitched in. Upon closer inspection, you read what it said and your breath hitched. 

 You’ve got a smile that could light up this whole town. Don’t forget it. Love, your Morgan

“Mo, I don’t even know what to say. This is-this is perfect. I love it, thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” He pressed a kiss to your temple, before slipping out of the room, both empty mugs in his hands. Your heart started to beat faster again, and as you stared down at the inscription, you had to remind yourself that it didn’t mean anything special. He was acting like your boyfriend, but he wasn’t your boyfriend. This was all fake, and this must’ve been a part of it; a show for your family to make sure you didn’t get in trouble. 

You shoved those feelings deep inside you, instead focusing on the Christmas spirit your family had. The living room was full of laughs and someone had turned on the Christmas music. Morgan came back and sat beside you, his arm resting comfortably over the back of the couch and you couldn’t help but curl into his side. The kids came over and asked to play with Morgan and he eagerly agreed, switching from playing cars to dolls to lifting them up to play the airplane game. Like the Grinch, your heart grew three sizes watching him interact with your family – the way he was so patient and sweet with them meant everything, even if he was just pretending. 

Later, your Grams arrived and Morgan was quick to win her over as well. You bit your lip, trying to stop from smiling so wide as you watched him help her with her coat, and lead her over to where he was sitting. 

“Do you mind holding her for a few minutes?” Izzy said, coming over with Taylor in her arms.

“Of course not! Come ‘ere, darling girl.” You rocked the baby in your arms, sometimes looking over to where Morgan was. Sometimes you even catch him looking at you. You took Taylor’s little hand and waved at him, and he over-enthusiastically waved back, making you laugh. 

“You picked a good one, you know? The two of you are really adorable together.” Izzy said, coming back to take her daughter from you. 

“Thanks Iz. He’s just…” You trailed off, trying to describe the situation. “I couldn’t imagine doing all of this with anyone else.” And it was the truth. From the plane ride to skiing to the gifts this morning, you couldn’t fathom bringing back a stranger and pulling this off in the same way. 

“Sounds like you’ve found the one then.” Her comment made you choke on air and turned into a full coughing fit. Before you knew it, Morgan was beside you, his blue eyes full of concern. 

“Are you okay?” His hand was rubbing your upper back as you continued to cough. You nodded as best you could, and he turned to get his cup. When you seemed to be finished, he handed it to you. 

“Here, drink. It’s water.” You gulped down the water and sighed. 

“Thank you.”

“Are you sure you’re okay?” 

“I’m good, thank you. I’m just going to get my lip balm; will you be okay on your own for a while?” You asked, placing a hand on his arm. 

“It’s your family, not war,” He laughed. “Go, I’ll be fine.” 

You smiled at his comment and gave him a quick cheek peck before making your way out of the room. In the bathroom, you took a breather, trying to stop your cheeks from blushing. Whatever you were doing with Morgan, it felt real. But it wasn’t, and you had to keep reminding yourself of that before you got hurt. 

When you exited, Grams was standing outside the door. 

“Sorry, I didn’t realize someone was waiting,” you said, quickly leaving the bathroom but she waved you off. 

“Oh, I haven’t been here that long. But dear, my goodness, that Morgan. He’s a keeper, dear. You hold onto him, you hear me? With him, you’ll be happy for the rest of your life.” She said, patting your cheek before walking past you to the bathroom. You stood in shock for a moment at her words, before taking a deep breath and moving on. 

You were just friends. 

You repeated that to yourself as you sat next to him, pressing a kiss to his shoulder. You repeated it again when he moved your legs into his lap, caressing your ankle. You said it again when he snagged the race car, arguably the best Monopoly piece, only to give it to you, taking the lame iron for himself. 

“Hey, can I talk to you?” Julie said, tapping your shoulder, just before Monopoly (another family tradition) started. You nodded, and lifted your legs out of Mo’s lap. You pressed a quick kiss to his cheek before following her into the kitchen. 

“What’s up?”

“I wanted to apologize.” You furrowed your brows a little bit. “You know, for thinking your relationship was fake? It was wrong for me to think your relationship wasn’t serious but…I was just trying to look out for Mom and Dad. You don’t see how worried they get when you say you don’t have anyone in that big city. You’re the youngest, they’re always going to worry. And it’s just …You never even remotely told me about anyone and I didn’t want you to be faking it, just to get them off your back. But I was wrong and I’m sorry if it seemed like I was doubting your relationship. He’s perfect for you, and you seem really happy together.” 

It was everything you’d been wanting to hear – that even the most skeptic of your family bought your lie and was happy for Christmas. But no relief came like you thought it would; only a lump forming in your throat. “Thanks Julie, that…that means a lot. Would you excuse me please?”

You slipped out of the room, taking the stairs two at a time. You paced around for a few moments, before sitting on the edge of your bed, placing your head in your hands. You’ve gotten in too deep now and it’s going to hurt everyone — yourself included — when you have a ‘breakup’. Your mom will resent Morgan, sweet sweet Morgan, and he’ll probably get chewed out by his own mother, and it’ll all be your fault. You did this to your family, to Morgan, to yourself. 

“What’s wrong?” Morgan said, leaning against your doorframe. 

“Julie thinks we’re dating. Like for real. They all do. ” At your words, he pushed off the wall and sat beside you on the bed, his hands dangerously close to touching yours. You move them into your lap before you can’t function. 

“And that’s a bad thing?”

“Yes.”

“I thought that was the whole point of this? To make them think we’re dating?”

“No, it was. It’s just….” You trailed off, looking down at your hands. 

“It’s just what?” 

“It’s too much, okay!” You stood up and turned to face him. “Like you’re here. You’re in Vancouver again, with me again, in my parent’s house like we’re fifteen again! You can’t be around like this and expect me not to think about the road not taken! And it doesn’t seem to bother you! And I don’t like lying! I don’t need to be lying to both our families, your teammates, my friends! I don’t need to be lying to myself that I don’t enjoy this! It feels wrong. I know we lied a lot as kids, but it feels different this time. It feels like people are going to get hurt and I don’t think I was prepared for that.” 

He took a moment. “We don’t have to lie, you know.”

“What do you mean? We’re fake dating; fake indicating lies.” You crossed your arms across your chest. 

He took another moment, taking a deep breath. “We don’t have to be fake dating. We could…be dating for real.”

“What?” you whispered.

“Can I be honest here? Like really honest?” He asked, and you could only nod slightly. “I thought you would’ve got your head out of your ass by now. I thought you had feelings for me.

"Why do you think you said my name? You could’ve said any other name but you said mine. You could’ve found any other Morgan in Toronto but you asked me. You could’ve come clean to them! There were a thousand ways you could’ve gotten out of this but you didn’t! I thought that meant we had something special; that you were finding excuses to bring me here.” He sees your blank, shocked face as a sign to continue. 

“And now that we’re here? Back in our hometown? It just all rushes back to me about how I didn’t tell you how I felt. Then I spend the days doing your family traditions and seeing you so happy with Drew and Rebekah and thinking that I could’ve had this a long time ago. But I was a coward and I don’t know if I can make the same mistake again.”

“What are you talking about?” You said breathlessly. 

“When we were at Lighthouse Park that day, I almost told you I loved you. But I didn’t. And I went to Toronto and tried to forget the huge regret I’d made. I can’t- I can’t do that again. I love you. I have loved you since we were kids. I didn’t want you to be tied down when you moved out so I didn’t say anything and I tried to forget how I felt about you. But in two days, you’ve made me fall for you all over again and I can’t go back to how things were. I won’t. I don’t want to be your fake boyfriend when I am irrevocably in love with you. I want this,” He stood up and walked closer to you, his fingers reaching out for yours. “I want this to be real.” 

“Mo…holy shit.”

“Yeah. It’s a lot, I know.” He went to step back, to give you space after everything he said, but you held onto his hand tighter. 

“No, like holy shit, I was going to tell you I loved you that day too.” One of your hands traveled to rest on his cheekbone as you caressed his soft skin. “I didn’t want to give you more pressure as you started your career; that wouldn’t be fair. But some part of me has always wanted this to be real.”

“Really?” The corners of your mouth started to lift up as you nodded. “Can I kiss you?” He asked, ever the gentleman.

“Please.” And less than a second later, his mouth was on yours. Maybe it was a good thing you waited so long, because this was better than anything you could’ve imagined at eighteen. His hands found your waist, and pulled you closer, deepening the kiss. 

When you finally pulled away for air, you pressed your forehead against his. “Wow.” 

“You’re telling me.” You giggled at him and played with the hair at the nape of his neck.

“Guess you can tell the team we’re dating for real life now.”

He laughed and pulled you in for another kiss. “For real life, eh?”

“For real life. As long as you’ll have me. ”

“Forever then, babe.” He winked, squeezing you tight. “Now let’s go join the family, yeah? Gotta beat my in-laws at Monopoly.”

His antics had you in laughter all the way down the stairs, but you wouldn’t have it any other way. There was happiness because of him.

taglist (join here): @heatherawoowoo @4ambagelbites @typical-simplelove @2manytabsopen @stars-canucks @lorrmorr @fallinallincurls @plds2000 @barzysandhughesbaby @yummygoldenfood @drei-mrssvechii @bananarantanen @pulpfixion

#the winter fic exchange 2k23 #morgan rielly #morgan rielly imagine #morgan rielly fic #nhl imagine #nhl fic #nhl x reader #toronto maple leafs fic #toronto maple leafs imagine #hockey fic #hockey imagine #abby writes #fun fact i have had parts of this idea since i heard the song for the first time and im so glad to finally get it all out there for this <3

[canmom]

Animation Night 164: Yaoi, Yuri

The fashion on Tumblr lately has been to divide everything in the world into yaoi and yuri, hasn't it? Well, tonight we don't need to make any abstract stretches of the imagination: it's time for anime where boys kiss boys and girls kiss girls.

So. Five minutes ago, before Tumblr deleted it, this post was off to a pretty good start! I was happily explaining about the differences of nuance between 少年愛 shōnen-ai, 耽美 tanbi, ジュネ june, やおい yaoi and ボーイズラブ bōizu rabu on the one hand, and on the other, why 薔薇 bara (rose) isn't a genre title but nevertheless the editor of 薔薇族 Barazoku ('rose tribe') magazine coined 百合 yuri as a distaff counterpart, the 'lily tribe', and that really caught on.

I was starting in on a brief sketch of some history, how Tokugawa Japan was super gay and had a defined set of social rules for gay relationships in the form of 男色 nanshoku, but this was squashed by the Meiji restoration, and thus gay manga became a subgenre cultivating its own specific otaku audience.

So then I was gonna tell you about how the early shōjo manga focusing on gay relationships, taking the old term shōnen-ai [which originally referred to pederasty], were quite nerdy and literary, but the subgenre rapidly grew in the 70s and 80s, cultivating an otaku audience of its own - primarily women termed, somewhat disparagingly, 婦女子 fujoshi but this demographic breakdown is certainly not absolute and there is a term for male fans, which is 普段し fudanshi. We coulda gone into the whole world of doujinshi, of the massive convention comiket; I coulda cracked open Kimi Rito's History of Hentai Manga for some interesting tidbits about how certain images become encoded as symbols and then reused routinely in manga.

And you know, I might have talked about how this is distinct from manga aimed at gay readers in gay magazines (like the above mentioned 薔薇族 Barazoku) which might be termed ゲイ漫画 gei manga. Perhaps we might mention here the upcoming adaptation of gay manga meme sensation kuso miso technique:

I was maybe gonna talk a little about some of the older genre conventions of BL; the masc top or 攻め seme and the effeminate bottom or 浮け uke; maybe a little about how yaoi fandom got exported into anime fan culture in the West and the strange phenomenon of the 'yaoi paddle'.

...well, it looks like I managed to skim over all that anyway. Spite works wonders for typing speed, it turns out. But believe me, that's really just surface level stuff. We're working on a followup to the legend of Animation Night 69, so we'll be able to get in a lot deeper in a few weeks~

Anyway, even today, BL and yuri works rarely get adapted into anime in a particularly high profile way. But 'rarely' is not never! In Animation Nights past, well: on Animation Night 69 we watched the delightful 風と木の詩 Kaze to Ki no Uta (The Song of Wind and Trees), an OVA adapting the seminal (ha ha) shōjo manga about a French twink at boarding school. That was the direction of Yoshikazu Yasuhiko, known also for Venus Wars and definitely the subject of a future Animation Night, it was as moving and melodramatic as you could hope from 70s shōjo. Sayo Yamamoto (AN36) brought us the incredibly charming figure gay skating series Yuri on Ice; and then of course Kunihiko Ikuhara (AN155), bless his heart, made his always bold statements on yuri with Yurikuma Arashi ('Lesbian Bear Storm') and BL with Sarazanmai, which I will surely cover if we ever reach the point where we're like 'let's marathon a TV anime' again ;p

Tonight though? We'll be looking at a couple of relatively recent films on both sides of the fence.

For the BL wing, we have the film 海辺のエトランゼ Umibe no Étranger, aka L'étranger de la Plage or Stranger by the Shore. Kanna Kii, the mangaka, had previously worked as an animator at Studio Hibari, a small anime studio that dates back to the late 70s and broadly seems to specialise in shōjo. Kii returned there to design characters and supervise the film, and evidently Hibari were very excited to adapt the work of their alumnus, because they absolutely spared no effort.

The story centres on orphaned highschooler Mio and his neighbour Shun, an aspiring gay novelist on a remote island in Okinawa. The pair grew close three years before the start of the story, but Mio had to leave Okinawa; we join him now as he returns to that same shore, still holding feelings for Shun.

I'll admit, I don't know a ton about this movie - but it comes highly recommended by kvin who described it as one of an 'oasis' of strong BL works released around 2020. And the clips I've seen - well, they're the gifs used in this post, really nicely drawn scenes of affection. So I'm pretty excited!

Our yuri wing... well, there's a few good choices for yuri TV shows I could show you, but tonight it's late and we need something short and sweet, and that really narrows the field! What I have is あさがおと加瀬さん。Asagao to Kase-san [Kase-san and the Morning Glories], a one hour OVA adapting the manga 加瀬さん Kase-san by Hiromi Takashima. The OVA starts partway into the manga, when plant nerd Yui Yamada has already started dating her crush, the athletic Tomoka Kase. It follows the trials of the girls' relationship as they are coming towards the end of their time at school - relatively low-key, slice of life first relationship typea thing.

The animae was adapted by studio Zexcs under the direction of Takuya Satō, who you might remember as director of the first part of Armitage III [AN153]. Zexcs spun out of JC Staff at the end of the 90s, and they've been pretty busy since then - for me their most notable creation is Aku no Hana (The Flowers of Evil), a truly unique rotoscope anime with an incredibly engaging, tense story about teenagers and the imp of the perverse... which sadly never got the love it deserved! yes I'm still beating this drum!

Anyway, while I have not been able to find a ton of production information, I am told at least that Kase-san was a passion project for Satō - evidently a yuri fan given he also took on the adaptation of Otherside Picnic. It began first with five-minute web adaptation Kase-san and the Morning Glories in 2018 that's more of a musical montage of moments from the series, which was then able to be expanded the next year into an hour-long OVA...

A lot of romance stories focus on the characters getting together, so it's interesting that this one skips right over those chapters of the manga and gets going once the characters are already together, focusing more on the trials of an ongoing relationship between two goofy hormonal kids trying to figure out if this is just a class S thing or something that they want to last. A great deal of effort is put towards character animation, intimacy, the little flinches and reactions. You can read a little discussion about it here on ANN.

So! With apologies for the late start once more (T_T), it's time to begin! Animation Night will shortly be live at twitch.tv/canmom, and I hope you'll join me for a gay old time~

#Youtube #animation night #long overdue subject and i wish i had had more time to do it justice

[khalewren]

Sonic character music HCs

 I’ve been obsessed with both the Sonic the hedgehog series and Music in general for over a year now, so i figured i could combine those interests in a fun way. I’m gonna describe what kind of music i personally think the characters would like/listen to. And just so you know, this is just my thoughts on it, i’m not saying im right or anything. And while i am trying to match these genuinely, it’s also not something i’m taking fully seriously. I’m just doin this for fun :)

I also suggest looking up some of the terms/artists/genres i use here if you’re not already familiar with them! Might help you understand my reasoning a bit more, and who knows, you might even find a new favourite artist 👀

Oh, and one more thing. While i am of course going to go off of music i’m familiar with, i’ll try to avoid assigning characters music that i like just because its music that i like. That being said, i will of course, be just a tad bit biased. Anyways, time to start with the blue boy himself!!

Sonic

Sonic is somewhat easy. Seeing as how his main thing is standing up against tyranny, i imagine he’d definitely be a fan of punk. At first i thought of pop punk specifically, due to its high energy, but i feel like Sonic would find it a bit too commercial. Same thing with skate punk. I feel like anarcho-punk could be a little more up his alley? Maybe something like chumbawumba.

Oh, and personal bias time: I think he would like King gizzard and the Lizard wizard due to the themes of enviromentalism.

Example of Sonic’s music taste

Tails

Now, i’m completely split between two different paths here. The first option is EDM. Just overall music that sounds electronic, maybe dance, i dunno. The second option however, is one that i personally prefer: Just like, music with weirdass time signatures and polyrhythms n shit. Math rock, Prog, that kinda stuff. Specific bands i’m thinking about is Tool, King crimson, Black midi, maybe even KGLW (again, personal bias). Tails would think music theory is fucking dope and would be OBSESSED with this kinda music lmao.

Example of Tails’ music taste

Knuckles

Now, this is the rare instance that i feel justified in being biased, because his level themes in sa2 make me believe that knuckles is a hiphop head. Specifically, instrumental hip hop. I think he’d be a big fan of J Dilla’s style of hip hop production in general, with the soft fuzzy feel of songs like The light. Otherwise i feel like he likes some boom bap, like Illmatic.

Example of Knuckles’ music taste

Amy

I honestly feel like Amy is the kinda person who enjoys like, any type of music? Like this gal will listen to some chill folk music and then go directly to hardcore industrial rock lmao. I think her favourite genre is pop though. First artist that pops into mind is Carly rae jepsen, not only because she makes great pop music, but also since her songs are often about love, which i feel fits Amy pretty well. She’d probably like something more off-kilter like art pop too. She LOVES Björk, i feel confident in saying that.

Example of Amy’s music taste

Shadow

I’ve noticed that this one is quite varied (and if you’re curious, i don’t really mind the whole taylor swift thing, but i also don’t really care for it either), but i want to bring up a genre that i haven’t seen anyone else suggest Shadow being a fan of: Shoegaze. I think he would find the whole noisy, dreamlike, nearly overwhelming feeling of shoegaze calming. I don’t know, there’s just something about Shoegaze that makes me feel like it fits shadow perfectly. Only bands i really know are Slowdive and My bloody valentine, but i still feel confident in my opinion.

I also feel like the idea of him enjoying indie folk (something like the mountain goats) but would not be caught DEAD listening to it is really funny. The day that rouge finds out will not be a happy day for anyone in a ten mile radius.

Example of Shadow’s music taste

Rouge

Now, there’s a very easy answer here. Jazz. But i feel like rouge would also enjoy stuff like Soul and funk. She’d also check out music Shadow listens to, both to annoy him and out of genuine interest. Not much else i have to say here tbh.

Example of Rouge’s music taste

Omega

Harsh noise.

Silver

Similarly to Amy, i think Silver enjoys practically anything and everything, and is also super open to trying new stuff. If he has a preference though, i think he enjoys dance music? Or just electronic stuff in general. Daft punk comes to mind, specifically Discovery.

Example of Silver’s music taste

Blaze

I feel like Blaze is someone who simply hasn’t been able to listen to a lot of music yet? Her friends (particularly Silver and Amy) have given her a bunch of recommendations, and while she doesn’t have a preference yet, she has enjoyed some of the stuff that they have played.

Vector

On the complete contrary to Blaze, Vector is a supreme Music nerd. You name an artist or album, he is at the very least aware of them. He’s the kinda guy who will talk about some super obscure folk album from the 70′s and refer to it as if its some kind of holy grail. It’s great. He would have a vinyl collection, but due to the chaotix’s financial situation, he settles for CDs instead. Again, he enjoys practically anything, but i feel like his favourite genre is progrock. He also remixes music for fun.

And thats it!! I’ll try to think of more that i can add in a reblog, but for now, this is all that i can think of. Again, this is just my opinion, but i’d love to hear some of yalls thoughts!! why you think im correct or wrong or however!!

#sonic the hedgehog #sth #sonic music #tails the fox #knuckles the echidna #amy rose #shadow the hedgehog #rouge the bat #e 123 omega #silver the hedgehog #blaze the cat #vector the crocodile #khale rants about music

[triptychgrip]

Impact of figure skating politics on post-canon Yuri!!! on Ice

So, even aside from the rampant doping, I think many people are familiar with how the politics within the sport of figure skating really suck -- whether that's in terms of how skating federations meddle with their athletes' careers in ways these athletes clearly don't want or don't even know about, the way regulatory bodies -- the International Skating Union (ISU), and its various Commissions -- can and do remain silent when it comes to speaking out on abuse or corruption, or the complete shit-show of bias within judging, sometimes on a ludicrously visible level.

After all, this is a sport where a judge that showed clear bias at the PyeongChang Olympics was not only invited back to judge at the Beijing Games, but was given the position of being the technical controller!

Sheer madness...

It makes sense why Yuri!!! on Ice didn't delve into this stuff in a 12 episode season b/c the reality is: it's a major bummer.

But I work in public policy and am a social justice researcher whose career focuses on institutional change. So I often find myself asking the question "what would cause institutions/people/movements -- especially with a lot of history and influence behind them -- to change for the better, whether by 'force' (public outcry, insider advocacy, etc.) or their own volition?" It's a question I started thinking about a lot almost as soon as I got into Yuri!!! on Ice a few years back, and specifically, thought about in a post-canon context.

Some of the politics-related questions that surfaced for me, included:

-When Viktor returns to skating, how would his federation (the FFKKR) choose to treat his absence? Would they, perhaps, "make an example" of him at the Rostelecom Cup, purposely underscoring his performances? Or, would they have "given up" on him, trying to focus all of their attention/resources on Yurio's obvious rising star potential?

-Further, would they (with tacit or explicit media support) take a negative stance regarding his and Yuuri's highly public relationship -- perceiving Viktor's romance as a "threat" to his ability to return to the field as strong and focused as before -- or would they choose to ignore it, altogether?

-How would Yurio's growth spurt (which is hinted at in canon) impact the FFKKR's treatment of Viktor if the former is no longer able to put out the kind of performance that he did at the Barcelona Grand Prix Final? Or if Georgi retires from the field?

-How would skaters that wish to skate independently of corrupt federations -- something that is currently not possible under the way the ISU is structured with 'member nations' -- navigate their careers, and what avenues would they have at their disposal to avoid burn-out from the shitstorm of pervasive corruption?

-How would politics affect our favorite characters at an event as globally visible as the PyeongChang Olympic Games, and in its aftermath? (I say this with the caveat that I generally write yoi fic w/ the premise that it took place during the first half of the 2016 skating season, though there is no way to pinpoint the actual season).

All of these questions kept circling about in my head, and I felt highly motivated to begin writing a multichapter, post-canon "future fic". Specifically, a fic that would tell the story of married Yuuri/Viktor at the 2022 Olympic Games, but jumping back in time at various points over the previous five years to showcase how a particular scandal -- other than doping -- at the 2018 PyeongChang Games has "followed them" throughout the years (and has deeply impacted the sport/our other favorite characters).

This fic turned into a series called "Gold's On The Inside, Elevated My Feet", which currently is at 293K total words, and is being updated 1-2 times per month.

I know a lot of people aren't into long, novel-length works, especially if they're WIPs, but if you, like me, are fascinated by some of the real-world issues that might impact Yuuri/Viktor/Yurio and others post-canon, I hope you'll consider checking my work out.

I've included a spoiler-free excerpt from Chapter 11 of part 1 of the series, below, that I feel hints at the politics while encapsulating the Viktuuri fluff, friendship antics, and overall supportive themes that I've tried to weave into my stories.

I hope it piques your interest and encourages you to check the series out, or my other Yuri!!! on Ice fics!

---------

“First of all, how the hell would you have even managed to contact me from all the way over in the Kiss and Cry?” Phichit went on. “Did they imagine you had waved a wand to send a carrier pigeon flying through Gangneung Ice Arena to land directly on my head ? After which, it would peck an intimidating message in Morse code straight onto my scalp?”

Yuuri was now hiccuping giggles, and he was pleased to see that he’d begun to wipe a profuse quantity of tears from his cheeks.

When his best friend had told him that he wanted to hear all the nitty-gritty details of his International Court of Arbitration for Sport (ICAS) hearing, Phichit had definitely had some misgivings; Yuuri and Viktor had flown to Lausanne for their own proceedings directly after the latter’s retirement party in Milan, and given what they’d told him about each brutally long-winded 4 hour session, he’d known fun things were not in store for him.

“But Yuuri without his glasses on can be very intimidating…very sexily intimdating,” Viktor said with a grin, prompting a playful slap on the arm from his fiance; thanks to Yuuri’s thirsty fans, the hashtag #Yuuri’sNearsightedSexySquintTally had become a staple on the competition circuit, and both he and Viktor had taken to alluding to the phrase as much as possible.

“Yes, I’m sure that’s exactly what permanent-frown-dude-arbitrator was referring to,” Yuuri responded, sarcastically, “my nefariously sexy squinting that so very clearly spelled out that Phichit better file a claim, or else.”

He and Viktor both laughed, and he shared a few more snippets from his hearing before conversation moved along to discussion around the other Olympics claimants’ hearings.

“Oh my god, just imagine Christophe during his,” Yuuri said, before giving Makkachin a kiss, right to the top of her fuzzy head.

The poodle was splayed out across both of her dog-dad’s laps, taking up much of the bench directly in front of the rink boards at Hasetsu’s Ice Castle. After their hearing, the couple had flown to St. Petersburg, spending just a few days there to get Makka and Meni and do a round of cursory packing. They’d then taken off for Japan where they planned to stay until mid-June, which was the beginning of the rainy season.

Even from afar, Phichit had been able to keep tabs on Yuuri thanks to Nishigori Yuuko. After thoroughly bonding with her at Viktor’s retirement party – after all, a willingness to drunkenly act out the unhinged plot of The King and the Skater 3: Because Time Loops Are A Thing tended to solidify people in Phichit’s mind as lifelong friends – she had been messaging him through Instagram as well as contributing heavily in the “Yuuri Support Squad” chat.

Soon enough, he’d be able to keep tabs on him in-person, as his own trip to Hasetsu was just three weeks away.

“He’d be all: ‘And then, my esteemed arbitrators, I got distracted from calculating Yuuri’s grade-of-execution, because my eyes were too busy lingering on his delectably muscled thighs as he came out of his triple-lutz, triple-toe combo’,” Viktor said, in a deliberately put-upon Swiss accent, while lasciviously licking his lips.

Phichit barked out a laugh while Yuuri grinned at him.

“Are you sure you aren’t just verbalizing the thoughts you wish you could have expressed during your hearing?” he asked his fiance.

Viktor gasped, theatrically, and clutched Meni even more closely to his chest before responding.

“I would never think such a thing! I’ve become an expert at admiring your beautiful thighs while simultaneously calculating your GOE,” he said, sounding proud. “As any good coach should be.”

#yuri on ice #yuri!!! on ice #viktuuri #victuuri #my writing #ao3 writer #victor nikiforov #viktor nikiforov #katsuki yuuri #yuuri katsuki #phichit chulanont

[virtchandmoir]

They’ll be dancing with themselves next season when same-sex teams come to Canadian figure skating

The move is meant to create opportunities for skaters who can’t find partners, but it’s sure to create an uneven playing field.

January 12, 2023

Figure skating is the most gay-friendly sport in the world. If there’s any athletic arena that doesn’t need a woke kick in the arse, this is it.

That’s if “inclusion” — as the term is now understood to mean — were the motivating factor behind Skate Canada’s decision to permit same-sex competitors in ice dance and pairs as of next season. The organization has rewritten policy, which previously specified that those disciplines must comprise a man and a woman, quite patting itself on the back for the groundbreaking shift.

But figure skating has long had a problem of gender imbalance, from the earliest of age. There aren’t enough males to go around in coupled competition, at least in North America. At rinks across Canada, little girls who want to do pairs or dance have difficulty getting proper ice time because of that scarcity. And as skaters mature, entering the elite ranks internationally, quite frankly men can have their pick of a partner, trade up. Hence, females who have put in just as many hours of training, honing all the necessary skills, sometimes find themselves jettisoned for a more medal-enticing model.

So maybe conjoining girls with girls makes some sense, particularly in ice dancing.

But indisputably, man-man pairs would create a competitive advantage, especially in the side-by-side jumping elements. Men routinely do quad jumps now while only a handful of women include four-rotation jumps in their singles routines. Because Skate Canada has no intention of expanding formats to encompass strictly same-sex teams, male-male duos would compete alongside male-female couples. I don’t see how that playing field can be levelled.

Canada is the first and thus far only country to go down this road. There’s been not a shred of evidence that the International Skating Union is in the mood for changing its rules. Consequently, at this point same-gender teams would only be able to compete domestically, up to the Canadian championships.

Scott Moir, who with Tessa Virtue won two Olympic gold medals and a silver — they’re the most decorated ice dancers in history — was among those who most passionately advocated for the rule change.

He insists there would be no competitive edge for a same-sex men’s team. “If you’re asking yourself who would win between Tessa Virtue-Tessa Virtue and Scott Moir-Scott Moir, I’m going with Tessa. I know that Tessa, if she trained lifts, she could lift. She was a fantastic flyer.”

To be clear, Moir is talking about ice dance. He doesn’t consider himself qualified to speak about pairs.

“It’s just time for us to give a bit more access to the sport of ice dance,” Moir, now a coach, told the Star on Thursday at the Canadian championships in Oshawa, where he has several teams competing in the junior ranks. “It allows us to get more athletes into the sport, most of all. But the other part is that I don’t think there’s an advantage to a man-man team or a woman-woman team. So it’s unnecessary to have those boundaries.’’

Moir anticipates that, with same-gender teams, skaters will invent new moves and different lifts, while exploring alternate storylines in programs — figure skating, performed to music, is very much about depicting a narrative, particularly in dance — though there would still be a “leader’’ and a “follower” as there is on nearly all dance expression. It’s make-believe with an athletic foundation.

“I don’t know if people know this but Tessa and I, while we love each other, we weren’t in love. We were playing characters our whole career. We convinced a lot of people. But two women, two men, can do the same thing, for crying out loud. It’s just the age that we’re in. The people that perceive it as quote-unquote gay, for me, I really care very little about what their opinion is.”

There’s a traditional view, Moir acknowledges, that the sport should stay the same way forever. But within the sport, among coaches and skaters, he’s found an open-mindedness, a willingness to adapt and innovate. And certainly, to find a competitive path for more females in the twosome events.

“There are a lot of female skaters who are sitting at home simply because we can’t find them a man. They’re all training at an elite level but they can’t get anywhere, can’t even get on competition ice. If this is all that it accomplishes, then I think it’s a success.”

Kaitlyn Weaver, a two-time Olympian with partner Andrew Poje — they’re event ambassadors in Oshawa — came out publicly as gay 18 months ago on social media. With Moir, she took a strong stand championing same-sex partnerships to Skate Canada. Weaver was sick Thursday and not at the rink, but she had explained her activism earlier this week in an interview with Lori Ewing of The Canadian Press.

“I don’t think there’s anything wrong with the stories we’re telling (but) I think there’s room for so much more. My queerness has a big part in why I felt especially motivated to help push this forward. We don’t see young people in our sport that are not heteronormative … and I think that that’s a problem.

“Canadians belong on the ice. If there’s a group of people that don’t feel like that, it’s our job to make sure that becomes a reality. And a visual reality. Kids can’t be what they can’t see. And if we make space for everyone, I think that our sport and our country will be much richer for it.”

The three-time senior world medallist has worked with American pairs team Anna Keller, a non-binary trans athlete, and Erica Rand. They had hoped to compete at their nationals but were prevented from doing so because U.S. rules still stipulate one man, one woman.

But will audiences accept same-sex teams? It’s a largely conservative fan base that has stayed loyal to the sport, which has otherwise plunged in popularity since the 1980s. Even Moir concedes that young girls who would benefit from skating with other young girls feel awkward about it.

“Right now, the females are shy. They’re worried about how the world of figure skating is going to look at them. That’s a big obstacle. The tough thing for me is pitching the idea, which I have many times, and it falling flat because they’re worried that they’re going to be judged and embarrassed and not taken seriously.”

The spectre of bullying and shaming is real. Moir, who is straight, likewise absorbed a lot of teasing in his younger days for being a figure skater, and an ice dancer at that.

“Not amongst my friends. My hockey player friends also stuck up for me because I played hockey against them. They knew they’d have to face me on the ice as well.

“Let’s hope we’re in a different era now.”

—The Star

#scott #off ice #interview: the star #i wish there would be more talk #about the barrier they'll face internationally

[kumeko]

A/N: For the Adam in Love zine! Kaoru felt like such a bitter ex in the anime and I wanted to kinda bounce from there. It was so hard figuring out the dialogue for the ending, reconciliation isn’t easy, especially when you’ve been hit by a skateboard (which I still call cheating, it’s a race, not a wwe smackdown). Also spent way too much time looking up skateboard terms for the title.

…

…

…

…

i.

At sixteen, Kaoru thought he knew his home like the back of his hand. He’d grown up here, after all, had spent most of his youth navigating its streets. Yet Ainosuke seemed determined to prove him wrong. In the year since they’d first met (and fought), his mysterious friend had taken him to every nook and cranny in town.

It was amazing just how many places you could skate in, if you were determined. Like, right now, he was sitting in a brand-new development area, a couple of acres filled with half-finished model homes and empty pools. Cranes and trucks dotted the landscape and bars of metal jutted out precariously in piles. All in all, a dangerous place to explore in the day.

And an exciting one to navigate at night.

Kaoru leaned against a wall, wiping the sweat from his brow. His long hair stuck to his neck like a scarf. He was used to this feeling of exhaustion; skating with Ainosuke and Kojiro was like a race to the bottom. Neither of them knew when to take a break. They’d been here since sundown and only now could Kaoru admit his legs felt like jelly.

His companions felt otherwise. Kaoru sighed as he watched them dart past, neither of them showing any signs of letting up.

With a cocky smirk, Kojiro taunted, “Tired already?”

“Some of us aren’t monsters,” Kaoru retorted, rolling his eyes. He didn’t bother to move, only watched as Kojiro shot off the lip of the pool nearby.

“And you aren’t?” Ainosuke questioned. He jumped off his skateboard and flipped it into his hand. “You keep up with us most nights.”

Kaoru watched Ainosuke from the corner of his eye. They’d both grown taller in the past few months, with Ainosuke just barely gaining an advantage. In his usual hoodie and jeans, he looked all limbs, like his body hadn’t kept up with his growth spurt. He appeared awkward on land, in a way he never did on his skateboard.

It was an oddly reassuring thing. Ainosuke always seemed to be one step ahead of him, whether it was skateboarding or life, and puberty gave them an equal playing field.

Unfortunately, that field didn’t apply to Kojiro who sprouted like a tree.

“And it’s tiring all nights,” Kaoru finally replied, taking a deep breath as he centered himself. It was hard to tear his eyes away from his friend. “How do you keep finding them?”

Ainosuke cocked his head, his messy hair covering his right eye. He leaned against the wall too, so close Kaoru could feel his heat. “Finding what?”

“These places.” Kaoru gestured at the space in front of him. “You show a different one every week.”

“That…” Ainosuke’s expression darkened. They’d hung out long enough that Kaoru recognized it for what it was: something to do with his family. Ainosuke glanced across the pool, to where Tadashi watched them silently. There was a secret language to their gaze, to the minute changes in their body. A sign of familiarity, of an Ainosuke Kaoru didn’t know.

He didn’t like it.

Ainosuke chuckled half-heartedly, as though remembering something. “I’m good at hiding.”

Kaoru glanced at him, then straight ahead. “I suppose so.”

Ainosuke hid his family from them. He hid them from his family. He hid behind so many lies and secrets, it was hard to tell just what parts of him were genuine. The only time it all fell away was when they skated, when there was nothing but speed and rubber and the thrill of the chase.

Ainosuke’s smiles then were honest.

Of that, Kaoru was certain.

“What’re you talking about?” Kojiro asked as he climbed out of the empty pool. His eyes met Kaoru’s. There was something heavy about his lingering stare. Kaoru could feel the weight of it, even if he couldn’t understand why. Electricity hung in the air.

“How much you suck,” Kaoru lied reflexively, looking away first.

“Ouch.” Kojiro laughed, the insult rolling off him like water on a duck. It always did; Kaoru was half-convinced nothing could dampen his spirit. “And everyone at school calls you a gentleman.”

“I dunno.” Ainosuke leaned closer, his breath warming Kaoru’s ear. Kaoru could feel every word more than hear them. “I think you’re right.”

Kaoru flinched, his skin burning at the sudden proximity. Judging by Ainosuke’s mischievous grin, he’d provoked that response on purpose, the bastard.

“Hey! I heard that!” Kojiro retorted, scowling.

“Maybe I wanted you to hear?” Ainosuke drawled, chuckling. His eyes were bright and he was still far too close. Kaoru resisted the urge to recoil when their shoulders bumped.

“I’m the only good guy here,” Kojiro moaned.  “And here I was about to tell you about a good spot.”

That immediately caught Ainosuke’s attention. He straightened. “Oh? Where?”

“Should I tell you?” Kojiro scowled, but even Kaoru could see that he was already thrumming with excitement, that his grumpiness was just an act.

They didn’t even need to coax him before he’d already spun around, skating around the corner of the house and down the empty street. Ainosuke nipped at his heels but Kaoru kept behind, watching their backs as he followed them. It was an odd feeling to skate down a neighbourhood that consisted only of streetlights, the roads set in place before the houses.  It was an odder feeling to see the pair before him and see the space they kept for him even as they raced ahead.

“Here!” Kojiro pulled to a stop at a dug-up lot. Wooden boards and metal pipes criss-crossed the hole and a single staircase led down to a yet-to-be-made basement.

It was highly dangerous.

It was highly exciting. Kaoru didn’t have to look to know the expressions his friends had as they gazed upon their new playground. Neither moved, as though waiting for a signal.

“Scared?” Kojiro taunted, punching Ainosuke lightly on the shoulder.

“Says the one who’s shivering,” Ainosuke retorted, shoving him back.

Kaoru tuned out their daily fight. If they were lucky, one of them would be able to make it across to the other side of the pit. All three? Nearly impossible.

He skated forward. “I’ll go first.”

There was something about being with them that made him want to try the impossible.

ii.

In high school, Kojiro had thought of love as a light, fluffy thing. His sister’s romance novels, his girlfriends’ chick flicks, even his own experiences told him so. Love was fun. Love was exciting.

Love was heavy if you were an adult. Now in his twenties, Kojiro only found love at the bottom of a bottle.

And that was only when Kaoru let himself drink.

Kojiro tried not to sigh as he popped the cork of a cheap red and poured it into a wine glass. His reflection came back hazy and indistinct, and somehow that was more accurate than any mirror he’d looked into lately.

“You’ve gotten better,” Kaoru commented idly, taking a bite out of his pasta. “I almost can’t believe you used to burn the noodles.”

“That was once and we were ten,” Kojiro huffed, though he tried to keep the bite out of his voice. It was rare enough that Kaoru came to him instead of the other way around and he didn’t want to chase him away. Especially not when he was sitting at the bar instead of a table. This close, their knees almost touched; this close, Kojiro could pretend they were normal lovers as opposed to the complicated mess left behind.

“I wonder what those girls would say if they heard that…” Kaoru wrapped a delicate hand around his glass. There was something graceful about the way he raised the wine, about the way he drank it. Only a small droplet escaped his lips before a pink tongue nimbly caught it.

Kojiro jerked his head away. It was too early in dinner to have those thoughts. He didn’t even know why Kaoru was here yet. “Don’t you want it to be a secret? Just between us?”

“We have enough of those.” Kaoru gently swirled his wine. “I probably shouldn’t drink this.”

“Why?” Even as he asked, Kojiro could guess the answer.

“I’m the only one who gets drunk.” Kaoru scowled. “You can really hold your liquor.”

Bingo. Kojiro chuckled mirthlessly. “I have to be.”

“Have to?” Kaoru raised a brow before a look of understanding crossed his face. “Your girlfriends.”

No, it’s the only way you’ll actually talk. Just what would Kaoru’s expression be if Kojiro had said that? Surprised? Irritated? There’d definitely be a dose of denial.

“Why, jealous?” Kojiro drawled instead.

Kaoru snorted. “As if.”

The answer was never yes, no matter how many times they’d done this song and dance. Kojiro gulped his wine carelessly. In high school, love was easy. Even the awkward intimacy of their youth had been as natural as breathing, the way they had explored each other without fear. As an adult, it felt like he was walking on broken glass.

“I’ve got a reputation to maintain,” Kojiro finally replied, trying to keep his tone light.

“A worthless one.” Kaoru set down his glass and glanced out the window. It was a moonless night, the streetlights just barely illuminating the nearby shops. The odd car sped down the street, its headlights glowing like beacons in the dark. Quietly, he murmured, “He’s back.”

There was no need to ask who. There was only ever one he, only ever one reason that Kaoru came here to drink. Kojiro contemplated that he didn’t have enough wine to handle this and poured himself another glass. “I didn’t hear anything.”

“He’s not in the city. He’s just back in Japan.” There was rage and there was grief, and Kaoru always seemed to teeter between the two, as though he hadn’t quite figured out his own feelings. Maybe he hadn’t. As smart as he was, Kaoru was an idiot when it came to himself.

Not that he was any better. Kojiro had mostly sorted out his feelings to his old flame, but that didn’t stop the love and hate coiling in his gut at the news.

In high school, they had been fearless. Growing up meant learning what it meant to be scared.

And their shared fear was loss.

Even now, it was easy to feel Ainosuke’s space, even in these quiet dinners between the two of them. There was the empty seat on Kaoru’s right, the one he kept no matter where he sat in the shop. There was the longing and loathing in Kaoru’s voice whenever he got drunk enough to reminisce. There was the skateboard that chased Ainosuke’s ghost across the streets as though if they went fast enough, they could stop him from leaving for America all those years ago.

Ainosuke’s fingerprints were everywhere.

And Kojiro was tired of it. “Does it matter?”

Kaoru bristled. “What do you mean does it matter—”

“He’s not Ainosuke,” Kojiro interrupted, the our left unsaid. At this point, he couldn’t even imagine kissing the politician their ex had become, let alone loving him. “He was never that cruel.”

“Maybe he was hiding it,” Kaoru spat out.

It’d be easier if he had, if everything they’d known had been a lie.

It would be easier, but despite it all, Kojiro still treasured those teenage nights, the sloppy kisses and competitive smirks and moonlight races. “I hope he wasn’t.”

“Still.” Kaoru pushed his bangs out of his face, his skin flush from the wine and anger. “He still needs to pay.”

Kojiro reached across and grabbed Kaoru’s hand. He swiped his thumb on a familiar scar, felt the callouses from the pads of his fingers. “Does he?”

And if Kaoru’s eyes had always been firmly on Ainosuke, his had always been on Kaoru. A familiar jealousy coiled in his chest, a feeling that had only eased for the short time they had all called each other mine.

It was impossible to compete with a ghost.

Especially if the ghost wasn’t dead.

Look at me, he wanted to beg, to whine. I’m still here.

But he was a coward, he had always been a coward. The only time Kaoru would talk to him was when he was drunk and that only time Kojiro would try to compete with Ainosuke’s shadow was when the alcohol blurred the boundaries of past and present.

If Kaoru’s response was to chase AInosuke, Kojiro’s was to stay still.

Maybe he hadn’t escaped Ainosuke’s ghost either.

“We should—”

A snore interrupted him. The wine had done its job. Slumped across the table, Kaoru dozed peacefully.

“There’s never a right time between us,” Kojiro sighed. He tenderly brushed the hair out of Kaoru’s face before pressing soft kiss on his forehead.

The wound they shared had yet to heal. Sometimes he feared it never would.

iii.

Ainosuke, for all of his savagery on the racetrack, was a fairly predictable creature. His daily routine remained the same, regardless if an adorably aggressive cop stalked him around town. He met politicians all day and warded off his aunts all night. His meals were high class, regardless of their contents. In every conversation he had, he made sure to pick the most proactive response.

For all he had derided Cherry, Ainosuke was a boring man himself.

Which is why today was a remarkable change from it all. Ever since he’d left for America as a teen, Ainosuke had never imagined meeting Kojiro and Kaoru again and especially not somewhere that didn’t involve skateboarding.

Yet, here he was, sitting in the patio of a local coffee shop, holding a cup of extremely cheap coffee, face-to-face with a very hostile Kaoru and a more passive Kojiro. It was a strange reversal to how they’d behaved as teens.

The entire situation was odd. Ever since Ainosuke had returned, he’d seen them one by one at best, a glimpse of both at worst. Not like this, in the bright sunlight. Not like this, while wearing his usual suit. Not like this, as Ainosuke and not Adam.

There was a strange urge to flee, but he had long since decided to stop running from his problems. The only good thing was that the patio was closed off, so he didn’t have to deal with the press on top of everything else. Ainosuke could barely process the situation as it was, without having to think of a way to look good for the cameras.

Ainosuke’s gaze flicked to the table next to them, to where Tadashi quietly read a book, his eyes peeking up every now and then as he watched them. No, there were two good things; Tadashi was still here. He could handle almost anything as long as that remained the case.

He glanced back at his old ‘friends’. Did that moniker apply to them anymore? Had it ever truly applied? Even when they’d first met, there had been a spark between them, an attraction that he had chased down as fervently as he had skateboarding. An attraction that he had smothered and trampled on as thoroughly as he could before he’d fled to America.

“I didn’t think you’d actually come,” Ainosuke drawled, smiling flirtatiously. This wasn’t how he intended to start. The words and tone left his mouth anyways. It was a bad habit of his. “Miss me that much?”

“Don’t even joke about it,” Kaoru replied tersely, his voice clipped and short and straight to the point. When they were younger, he had rarely been so callous. He crossed his arms, sitting ramrod straight. “What did you want?”

“My, my, so impatient,” Ainosuke cooed, leaning back in his seat. He tapped his head. “Is the concussion still bothering you?”

Kaoru’s eyes flashed. Ainosuke could no longer tell what emotion passed through them, only that there was definitely anger. “Hope your ribs are still broken.”

Ainosuke chuckled. How could he have ever called the man before him boring? “Oh, you’ve gained a mouth on you.”

Before Kaoru could say anything, Kojiro grabbed his hand and squeezed it tightly. Softly, he uttered, “Kaoru.”

Kaoru stiffened. He glanced at Kojiro, at their clasped hands, and clicked his teeth. “Fine.” For a second, he was soft. Then he turned back to Ainosuke, as unyielding as steel. “Get on with it.”

There were many things Ainosuke had expected from this meeting, but the odd tinge in his chest was not one of them. It was suffocating about seeing the duo like that, closer than they had been as kids. An entire history lay between them, communicated only with small touches and sounds.

They had looked at him like that once.

They had touched him like that once.

Even now, Ainosuke could see his teenage self sitting with them, filling in the gaps between their bodies.

“Oh, how cute. When did you get together?” Ainosuke asked. It was petty. He felt ugly. He couldn’t stop himself from picking at the wound. “Does Cherry taste like cherry?”

Kaoru jumps to his feet, his chair scraping against the concrete harshly. “You…” he growled.

Truly, Ainosuke had been wrong to ever call the man boring. As calm and collected as Kaoru acted, it only belied the fierce rage and passion that stormed within him. And if Kojiro could draw out the positives in it, Ainosuke would take the negatives.

Any emotion was better than none., after all.

“I?” Ainosuke pressed, smiling benignly. He interlaced his fingers and rested his chin on them. “Darling, make sure to use your words.”

Kaoru’s expression was unreadable again. Anger was easy to find, it had been easy to find ever since Ainosuke first returned to racing. But the rest was hard to decipher. Disgust? Hurt? Loathing? Before Ainosuke could settle on anything, Kaoru spun on his heel and stormed into the café.

Kojiro sighed, watching Kaoru disappear before turning back to Ainosuke. “You just can’t stop yourself, huh?”

Even Tadashi was giving him a look. Ainosuke closed his eyes. This wasn’t what he came here for. “No, I can’t.”

“That’s a pity.” Kojiro sighed again. He tapped his finger lightly against the table. “Kaoru was the one who wanted to come, you know.”

Surprised, Ainosuke opened his eyes. “He did?”

“What, thought it was me?” Kojiro chuckled mirthlessly, his expression bitter. When Ainosuke didn’t say anything, he shrugged. “He wanted to change. Don’t know why he thought this would help. Did you ever miss us after you left?”

“No.” It wasn’t a lie. It wasn’t the truth. Ainosuke had chipped away at himself until he couldn’t remember what longing felt like, what missing meant.

Kojiro deflated, disappointed. Ainosuke didn’t know he could still disappoint someone. “Too bad. He…we missed you. I thought…well, I guess things changed. You know, Kaoru likes bitter drinks these days and I prefer sweet. And you…you aren’t someone who cares about any of this.”

Ainosuke could only stare. Kojiro had never been this direct and he didn’t know what to do with the exhausted look Kojiro gave him. It was filled with regret. It was filled with sorrow.

It was filled with the tail end of love.

Instinctively, Ainosuke knew that if he did nothing, the next time Kojiro looked at him, there would be nothing. They would be acquaintances at best. There would be a distance he could never cross.

His throat burned at the thought. “I’m not that boy anymore.”

“We aren’t those kids either.” Kojiro gripped the table tightly, his knuckles white. “I hoped…never mind. I’m done chasing. Just get to the point.”

As though on cue, Kaoru opened the door, his expression carefully blank as he returned to his seat. “You have a minute and then I’m gone.”

Tadashi’s eyes were on him. Ainosuke breathed in.

For a long time, he had thought he hadn’t known love. That he had never known love. But that had been a lie. He had known it in Tadashi’s patient hands, in Kaoru’s timid kisses, in Kojiro’s kind touches. Ainosuke had always known love, he had just lost it.

No, not lost. He had tossed it away. The only fortunate thing was that Tadashi was still beside him. That Tadashi would always be beside him.

If he didn’t do anything, he’d be throwing away the pair in front of him.

Ainosuke breathed out. He hadn’t come here to lash out. No, just like Kaoru, he had come here to change something.

He hadn’t known what until this moment.

“Let’s skate,” Ainosuke stated simply.

Kojiro stared at him, dumbfounded. “What?”

“I’m not racing you again.” Kaoru snorted dismissively. He didn’t hesitate before standing. “I’m done.”

“I didn’t say race.” Ainosuke smiled, resisting the urge to tease, to taunt. That came easily to him but what was needed now was sincerity. And that was something he had long struggled with.  “Don’t you want to play in an Olympic-sized pool? I happen to know where you can find one.”

“Then…” Kojiro frowned, his brow furrowing as he tried to find a hidden meaning.

Unlike him, Kaoru didn’t mince his words. His voice was cold as he asked, “What are you really after?”

You. Ainosuke was a greedy man. If they were tired of following, then he’d chase after them. If they were ready to let go, he’d grasp twice as hard. It wasn’t enough to just have Tadashi. It wasn’t enough to know of love and let it go. He had never been that selfless.

And he didn’t know if he could handle them treating him like a stranger, like he meant nothing.

But he’d pushed too far and now was the time for a slow courtship. Ainosuke winked. “Nothing. What, can’t a man want to see his old flames?”

#sk8 the infinity #ainosuke shindo #kaoru sakurayashiki #kojiro nanjo #matchaloveblossom #fanfic

[czenvs3000f23]

Unit 3 Blog

Prompt: What role does “privilege” play in nature interpretation? Please include your working definition of privilege.

I think privilege is a central tenet of nature interpretation. A comprehensive understanding of what privilege is as well as how it touches every aspect of our lives is crucial for effective programming. To my understanding, privilege defines the advantages someone may have that they might not even be aware of. These advantages can provide an edge for gaining opportunities that others may not have access to based on different barriers.

Personally, I think I've been on both sides of the privilege coin. I come from a middle-class family in the suburbs and had access to good schools while growing up. Due to my family's financial status, it allowed me to participate in expensive extracurriculars (ballet, swimming, skating), explore my passions (National Geographic subscriptions) and provided me an education at one of the district's top-rated high schools. I had the resources to really figure out my direction in life. However, some might have not been as fortunate. Oftentimes someone of a lower economic status can't afford to throw money at hobbies, they need it for rent, food, and utilities.

On the other hand, I feel as though being a woman in STEM presents its challenges. I like to be feminine, wear makeup, and wear nice outfits. Doing these things makes me feel like myself as it provides some structure and routine to my day. Despite this, I feel like presenting this way gives off preconceived notions about my intelligence. People may think I'm trying too hard or that there's no reason for me to get dressed up. These thoughts are often fueled by misogyny by those who don't believe women have a place in science. And if they do, well then the woman has to minimize herself as much as possible to make them comfortable. How I dress and the makeup I wear does not and should not affect my ability to be a scientist.

In terms of nature interpretation, I think this conversation really highlights the complexity of what privilege is. People are multi-faceted, meaning that one person's advantages may be non-existent for others. Or, some may be privileged in some way but disadvantaged in others. Careful consideration of how privilege affects the delivery of nature interpretation can provide equal access and opportunities to all. Nature itself has no boundaries-- it's everywhere. Neither should education about it. Having a connection to the environment is so important when even thinking about climate change mitigation and conservation efforts. This is simply not possible to do if only a percentage of the population is willing to do something about it. Creating accessible opportunities for all is key. I think it's so sad when children are unaware of the majesty of Ontario's ecology. Sure, it's not visually impressive like the Amazon but there is a wealth of information that makes the landscape like no other.

[sillycyan]

There is so many things I want to start as hobbies and what not, but they are way too expensive to truly dive into.. SO INSTEAD IM GONNA LIST EM + go on random side rants

TLDR: Take care of ferrets, skateboard, biker, art, vtuber, open sticker shop, collect manga and figures, scriptwriter, and learn Russian.

I definitely want ferrets in the far future. There has been hours on hours of research and planning to make it happen (ᗒᗣᗕ) This is something that does have to wait a few years when I’m financially stable and sticking to things in the house.

Skateboarding.. I have a board, but it’s a very DOOKIE one so around this month I’m gonna stop by a shop for a new one. The main problem here is that I live in a city so there is really no places to skate around and I already feel judged just being outside.. Imagine me on a skateboard??? I’m dying??

Hear me out on this one.. BIKER.. I recently have been really looking into motorcycles and when I do move out of the city (x_x) I’d truly rather be on a bike then in a car for reasons I will NOT explain. Cost wise it’s pricey, will have to be long term, and 100% is being my whole personality

I have been drawing on and off for a few years but with that I can’t trust myself to turn it into something serious as I have already quick multiple times for months to years at a time. I already own a drawing tablet, you not catching me on paper, and I already have a start. With art I feel forced to start commissions because it’s already so pressured to make money off it and that ruined the fun for me.

I want to stream as a vtuber soo badd!!! I already have a model now and plan to stream on my own time, but I’d love to be in an actual agency. Ofc I probably won’t be good enough for any because IM BLACK and it’s impossible to even get into any big names with that factor without being forced under a white and/or japanese persona… but it’s worth a shot yk?? Half throwing shade at the main vtuber agencies bc holy the racism in the community alone is horrible D:

Very sadly I got all the boring hyperfixations so I weirdly wish I could start a little sticker shop (-_-) Just for very cute random sticker sheets.. I collect stickers because it’s fun even though I haven’t use them because I don’t like to decorate my items with colors. Weirdly ties into how I’m a minimalist and I should never have kids because they would be the iconic “sad beige baby” GOD FOR BID I HAVE A GIRL oh my god they will never see the color pink ever (helps the color stereotypes ig)

Reallyyy REALLY want to collect manga. There are a few series I really just want to own and read SO IMA LISTEN EM HEHHE.. Banana Fish (own 1-9), Goodnight PunPun, Vagabond, A Girl on the Shore, Blood on the Tracks, Doomsday With My Dog, Chainsaw Man, Dandadan, Doubt, A Man and His Cat, and other names I’m not abt to remember..

Along with collecting manga I would love to collect figures, just a good few anime and game ones. Then just a whole bunch of Miku, but I’m stopping the blue aesthetic for my area and changing it to GREEN.. Really want the Banana Fish and Little Nightmares figured soo badd!!!!3!:?:!(:&36:

I cant drop too many details but.. scriptwriter.. I just think I could sit down and do that. NOT DROPPING SPECIFICS BC ITS EMBARRASSING SOO NEXTTT

Not sure if I can count this here, but I really want to talk time to learn Russian..? Show I’m fixated on and have been for years is in Russian and holy it made me wanna learn so baddd RAAAHHHHH

Just dropped 10 because no one is reading allat NOT EVEN I.. so if yew did read everything then helloo :))) I’m not gonna reread through nothing so sorry if it had bad spelling or grammar.. Rants don’t got time for allat

time to add a bunch of tags in relation to EVERYTHING update: not doin allat

#random rants #hyperfixation #I just wanna start hobbies man.. #ermmm awkward #hobbies #raaahhh #cyanrants #CyYapOfTheCentury

[insecxreasalwqys]

little rant on the crazy fanyus, as a fanyu.

You dont have to bring someone down to raise someone up. Im mainly talking about ilia here, but there are many, many skaters that some weird fanyus will bring down. If you dont know by now, Ilia malinin landed the 4a in practice. You’d think that people who love someone (yuzuru) thats so kind, so humble, and respectful to everyone, whether they beat him, whether they lost, whoever it is, would actually be happy for Ilia. But, no. Ive seen reposts of his 4a, and some people in the comments/replies decide to throw things at him. Like, “Its not perfect!” Or, “Under rotated!”. Keep in mind, some of these people dont know anything about figure skating. Some just like to throw terms around. Not all, but some. One comment even said, “Its just in practice. It means nothing.” And even though they were the only one who said this, im sure many people have said it on different videos of it. Werent the ones complaining that it was only in practice, the same ones obsessing over Yuzuru’s (not cleanly rotated) 4a in jnats practice (2021)? Saying things like, “G.O.A.T!”, or, “I knew he could do it!”. Im not trying to hate on Yuzuru, dont get me wrong, i think hes one of the best figure skaters out there, but, that doesnt change the fact that his 4a wasnt clean. What im trying to say here, is that fanyus are shooting down someone who landed it perfectly. They’re bringing down a kid. He’s 17, and their making him feel as if his 4a wasnt as good as it is. He said himself that reading what the crazy fanyus are saying about his 4a, makes him feel less excited that he actually landed the 4a perfectly. Fanyus like this, my friends, are the reason that many people in the figure skating community hate fanyus. Stop shooting down a kid, because you’re upset he did something amazing. Ilia is an amazing skater, and has a bright future ahead of him. What i find very funny is that some fanyus are even acting as if ilia landing it personally offended them. I will admit, I understand that they may be a little upset yuzuru wasnt the first to land it, and yes, perhaps i was a little sad when i saw that yuzuru wasnt the first, but, in the end, i was, and still am happy for ilia. So, instead of being a jerk, be happy for Ilia. Thats what Hanyu would want.  Sorry if i made spelling/grammar errors, and good day.

Also, forgot to mention now that im looking back at this post, i also noticed how fanyus like to mention how in 2012 jnats, yuzuru got booed, and was holding back tears, visibly shaking. Which, is true. So, yuzuru was like 18 there? Some fanyus say how they were making a kid feel bad about himself, and then some decide to make ilia, also a kid, feel bad about himself? The math isnt mathing. 

#ilia malinin #4a #quadruple axel #yuzuru hanyu #fanyus

[nailamoonsi]

2 and a half years worth of Blue Horizon book 1 pitches (mostly Pitlight) [and a bit of light novel and book 2]

The first "pitch" ever, and it mostly dealt with draft 1 of Blue Horizon book 1--back when in my mind I fancied writing a simple novella with the dads, Ranvir and Armando, before tackling an epic novel project after that (but that's now book 2).

I realized a lot in the process of figuring out book 1 through 2020 and 2021, however, and it quickly grew into a monster of a project--yet another epic science fantasy book for the series in my head. In my head I think of it as "the prequel novel." However I've long called it "book 1" online, so it'll stay "book 1." (It is complete but not yet published.)

Some parts of the pitch above barely has anything to do with book 1 as it is now...for Ranvir and Armando and friends. Weirdly, it might work for characters who show up later within book 1.

The moodboard above I'm very fond of as the first moodboard ever, and it involved the Chandrani family's energy re: ocean and water as well as a concept for "a wide open world." However I rarely wound up using it compared to the later regulars. (And apparently never for pitch practice again or any pitch event.)

A big note for all pitches is that any photography is by someone else and gotten from free-to-use stock image sites like Pexel and Unsplash BUT any drawn art is mine.

Above is the first times I tried bringing up the eerie aspect AND the soft aspect of Blue Horizon book 1. This was my experimental stage in all ways--a pitch with a mood and my first attempt at a "typical" moodboard, though obviously I wound up dropping these moodboards immediately. As can be seen with the moodboards I would settle on hereafter, I did need this stage to understand what I really wanted to go for!

As for the pitches--in the former, it basically revolves around the way the reader first walks into the novel, so to speak. In the second, it hints something about Ranvir and Armando, and brings up the Protector of Worlds without naming the role.

THIS WAS THE FIRST DEBUT OF MY MAIN 2 MOODBOARDS!!! And the first Pitlight I ever took part of in 2022. It somehow got to 23 notes without retweets (that 1 is for a quote retweet).

This was a quick Nanowrimo write-up--I can tell why people didn't take to it, but I guess in terms of pitches, I was learning and it didn't really matter, especially in the early days. Currently I'm doing Camp Sapphic instead.

This was the first time I referred to the Protector (of Worlds). It's technically a typical storyline across epic fantasies and many other types of stories--a "chosen one," so to speak, but in reality this is a job that's passed from person-to-person in their world, and was once representative of their place in the galaxy.

So this pitch very much focused on Ranvir and Armando right as I was finishing up Part 1, which is largely THEIR story arc! I'm very affectionate of it.

For a few posts in the early days, I kept reusing the first digital Armando and Ranvir art I ever drew. ; v ;

This was the first time I brought up the Mysterious Children (they keep appearing before Ranvir and Armando at different ages). This wasn't the first time I utilized this moodboard--the first time was January 2022!

But as people can tell at this point, this moodboard actually represents Alejandro Altaha and Antonio Chandrani-Rivera! Specifically, the sun, moon, lavender clouds, and the white clouds with shadowed figures skating across them with a teal sky surrounding--the shadowed figures are Ale and Tono.

I reused the same pitch for the later November Nano:

--this year however I'm doing Camp Sapphic and have let go of Nanowrimo due to its controversies. Edit in the evening is that this was the first time I got an agent like!

Even though this was extremely exciting and kept me going, I'm solo self-publishing Blue Horizon.

Next, back to summer 2022 pitches:

This was something I was hoping people would like, and in the end wound up one of my most popular pitches! :D This focuses on the warmer side of Blue Horizon and brings up a key character we all know by now--Antonio Chandrani-Rivera--for the first time!

(I'm unsure how much agents can gauge from this pitch, but I do like the feeling of it though and thus obviously used it for Pitlight.)

The rest under a cut because honestly I'll admit this is insane long.

This was the first time I brought up the children borne by magic lore! I forgot I did that when I looked back at old posts like 2 weeks ago. I'm actually surprised it got 11 likes, as I wasn't sure how people would see the children borne by magic subplot. Noticeable through the webcomic already!

So these two pitches are nearly identical; I was just worried one of the first pitch wasn't specific enough. However the first pitch got more retweets, likes and views, LOL. (It's an interesting situation--I think sometimes you wind up lucky with pitches.)

It'll become noticeable that I wanted to start referring to Antonio and Alejandro's conflicts, but Layla and Alia are major characters too, and thus I tried to put Layla in as well. However, at one point, people mentioned Layla comes off a bit random at the end of these sort of pitches. :"3c I do get that, but aw...

Overall, I realized what was best to focus on--Ranvir and Armando and their son (a.k.a. a direct connection) Antonio Chandrani.

MY FIRST OFFICIAL AGENT-RELATED PITCH EVENT... QueerPit! Official pitch events have been sporadic on Twitter since around 2022 but I was happy to catch this one.

Since I wound up emailing a lot of agents I decided not to take part in that many official agent-oriented pitch events in the end--my last was only my second one I believe, a.k.a. DVPit (unless I've blanked out another agent-oriented pitch event on Twitter). Those I won't show here directly from DVPit on Discord but from what I dropped for Twitter afterwards.

FOR THIS ONE... It was the first time I ever pitched... THE LIGHT NOVEL (also completed but unpublished). Just wanted to try.

This wasn't a real pitch exactly, and I dropped it on Twitter on September 28, 2023! However, this was the first time I brought up the scope of the epic science fantasy book 1 and its LGBT romances. My last Main pitch for Blue Horizon back a few days ago focuses on that too.

SO THIS IS THE FIRST OF 2 NEW PITCHES THAT I CRAFTED FOR BOOK 1 IN THE DVPIT SERVER ON DISCORD FOR THE OFFICIAL AGENT-ORIENTED PITCH EVENT, DVPIT...

For some reason neither were very popular on Twitter, but I like both of them a lot. My guess is due to the decision to try using a video for this one and a cropped art for the other one. [I did get agent likes...for the pitch I reused from QueerPit 😂 (which thankfully also got agent likes). However, I'm solo self-publishing Blue Horizon, as most of y'all know.]

Above is the first moment I was stressed, but thankfully by early this month I wound up cheery again.

So this was my first serious dud pitch after a very long time (i.e. my first Nano in March 2022). This one isn't the one I dropped on the actual NYEPitch day (also 1 like)--I'm embarrassed to show that one, but I was excited over people having fun about sun mage OCs at that time around the original day of January 1, and didn't think about terminology (I paid attention for my book)--since I use the term "water-bearer" and "ocean-bearer" a lot in my book, I ORIGINALLY used the term "bearer of the sun" for Alejandro [who's part of a binary star system] and "moon-and-sea-bearer" for Antonio in the pitch. (I do not use anything near "bearer of the sun" within Blue Horizon's epic fantasy books as I don't want to use similar terminology used in a popular published book.) I realized my mistake very late and changed it on January 5th, after 4 days! There's also the fact that this wasn't a pitch for book 1--I wanted to relax and try a first and second-to-last pitch for book 2~

However, thankfully that started my artist adventure because I got gloomy over only getting 1 like for the original and decided I wanted to destress.

I think it's also partly due to my showing up late and not participating with others due to it (I was feeling nasty tbh), possible shadowban (my posts at this time started plummeting in views compared to before in the months prior), and not specifying in the post that it isn't a sudden change from book 1 pitching, but a random attempt at a book 2 pitch.

It's because I got really emotional over finishing a story arc between Antonio and Alejandro for book 2, essentially.

THIS WAS THE SECOND DVPIT PITCH I CRAFTED IN THE DVPIT SERVER, AKA FOR THE OFFICIAL AGENT-ORIENTED EVENT... The only change from DVPit server is that I used Antonio's surname there, a.k.a. used Antonio Chandrani.

This IS about book 1; the epic science fantasy is a multi-POV book. I liked this one too, but I'm guessing either Antonio's depression era POV or the cropped-looking art made it not appetizing? This pitch is essentially a flip in perspective to Ranvir and Armando's perspective, and done partly due to my admitting that obviously Antonio Chandrani-Rivera (and Layla Chandrani) are the "traditional" main protagonists (though it's a very ensemble cast-oriented epic science fantasy book [and comic]).

This was for ChaosPit. Pitch as badly as you can, iirc.

SOOOOO AFTER A LOT OF STRESS AFTER AUGUST... I'M GLAD MY LAST PITLIGHT AND PITCH EVENT FOR BLUE HORIZON WENT OFF WITH A BANG...!!! On April 6th:

FOR THIS LAST MAIN PITCH FOR BOOK 1, I really really wanted to show off the "epic science fantasy" scale as well as mention tons of BIPOC and LGBT characters existing in it! (Calling back to that earlier proto-pitch.) I'M REALLY GLAD IT WAS WELL-LIKED.

I liked being able to use those emojis, too! They just feel like they give implications and have a weird or '90's clipart vibe together.

This is still the same Pitlight! I just wanted to try pitching the completed (but unpublished) light novel before I stopped pitching for Blue Horizon. Surprised and glad it was liked more than I expected! :D

Since it was my last time pitching for Blue Horizon after 2 and a half years, I wanted to drop one pitch for Book 2~! The first story arc is pretty serious but I thought it'd be an interesting note for anyone curious about Blue Horizon book 1 and the light novel.

AND FINALLY... I originally wanted a "cyclical" ending to all those months and even years pitching by utilizing my first Pitlight pitch ever (which was never reused in the interim).

It would've looked dreamy like this. However, I f*cked up the pitch due to changing the first sentence BUT MAKING A HUGE ERROR. LAST PITLIGHT WAS FUN. That's all!

#blue horizon tag #writeblr #mywrites #my ocs #writers on tumblr #long post #blue horizon heritage post #blue horizon archiving

[booksandwords]

On Thin Ice by Joel Abernathy

Read time: 1 Day Rating: 4/5 Stars

The Quote: Now he was staring at me, not like I had three heads, but like I hung the moon. It would be so easy to push him away, to chalk this up to desperation and loneliness, but that would be such a bald-faced lie, I knew it would be obvious. I would’ve never kissed Cameron out of desperation. Lust, sure. Then again, I’d never been one for lust. I was a hopeless romantic. I’d-- — Chase

Warnings: None of note

I enjoyed the very short On Thin Ice much more than I expected to. It is very simple and a lot of fun with just a sprinkle of something, not quite angst. Everything I need a piece of fiction. There is a degree of predictability to it but you know 🤷🏼‍♀️ I gave up caring about predictability in something this short years ago. For me its about the characters and chemistry. The whole story only has 3 real characters Cameron, Chase and the ghost that is Dan. Dan is Cameron's best friend and Chase's ex, he's not dead just not present. (Oh and a tertiary character that is there only to introduce a moment). The exceptionally limited cast is perfect for a snowed-in plot. The lack of other people locked in the rec centre with Chase and Cameron allowed for a frank and honest exploration of feelings. It always is, let's all be honest it's a trope for a reason.

Cameron and Chase are sweet as hell. The personalities of Chase and Cameron just work for me, misunderstood Cameron and prickly Chase. They are nearing a Grump/Sunshine dynamic but it's hard to execute in a work this short. I may or may not be projecting it a bit. They are almost inverse to what you may initially expect, though Chase as a solo figure skater needs that alpha dynamic. But it is easy to perceive just a bit of realism in both of them. I do like the reason for their long-term existing dynamic even if Chase doesn't easily admit it. Chase gets one of the cutest confession scenes, ok it's straight out of a teenage rom-com but you know the cliches are sometimes the best.

Some quotes I liked

As my blades carved the rink, I entertained myself with imagining it was Dan's throat. A little violent, perhaps, but infinitely satisfying. — Ooof. Boy after my own heart. But given Dan broke up by text (with impeccably sh**ty timing) and Chase's alpha personality often a requisite for solo skating I do appreciate it. (Chase)

Necessary, too. The guy was gorgeous and cruel to equal extremes. With his blond hair, piercing eyes, and chiseled jawline, he looked more like a leading man than a star forward, and it was pretty easy to see why he was the object of lust for every straight woman on campus, and more than a few of the guys, too. — This is Chase describing Cameron and it creates one helluva mental image. Cameron does the same for Chase later. They are both stunning in different ways. (Chase)

My best friend was a dick. I knew that better than anyone, considering that was why we got along. We had that in common, him and I. Of course, when it came to utter dickishness, I blew Dan out of the water. I mean, you really had to be a shitty person to have been lusting after your best friend’s boyfriend for the last three years. And I wasn't even gay. Sure, I’d watched some shit I stumbled upon online, and I’d liked it, but actually fucking a guy? I didn’t think I would ever do that. I didn’t even consider myself bi. What happened in my head was one thing. It didn’t count. Right? — Cameron has an interesting and very human sexual identity. He's also a bizarre mix of a realist when it comes to himself and an optimist when it comes to Chase. (Cameron)

#joel abernathy #on thin ice #book review #ktreviews #read 2022 #novella #booklr #enemies to lovers

[mermaidsandy]

How I Became a fan of Figure Skating and Why Today I almost compare it to Pro Wrestling

Today, we celebrate the first World Skating Day. Today, we celebrate the ice sports of figure skating, speed skating, synchronized skating, and short track speed skating.

I chose to celebrate this day by first watching this video above because it was the video that introduced me to figure skating. The year was 1995, it was I believe June or July of that year. I was eight at the time and the only sport I kind of watched was baseball. Then, one day, at our public library in North Wilkesboro, I found this video called "Magic Memories on Ice". I rented the video, went home, watched it with my uncle and...I was mesmerized.

I was mesmerized by its history, I was mesmerized by its music, I was mesmerized by the performances including one of Dorothy Hamill at the 1976 Winter Olympic Games. After watching that video, I persuaded my Mom several times to let me have figure skating lessons. Sadly, since I lived in North Carolina and skating wasn't as popular now as it was back then, she said no. She didn't have the money to give me lessons or ice skates for that matter.

So from 1995 through the year 2000, I would skate constantly around the house without any ice skates. Then, one day, my church organized a trip for some of the eighth graders that year in which myself and about 9 to 10 others went to an outdoor ice rink in Boone. It was my first experience on the ice and though I wasn't as good as I hoped to be, I felt the love on the ice.

Even at 14 and despite persuasions, Mom kept saying no to me fully committing to figure skating. So, when I started high school, guess one could say I stopped watching all together until the 2002 Winter Olympic Games and Evgeni Plushenko.

His free skate to what I eventually learned was Carmen restored my love for figure skating and from that day forward, I would watch almost every figure skating competition despite knowing that I would never get a chance to become a competitive skater myself.

Now...one is wondering why would I include a title that states "figure skating is like pro wrestling". Well...to me it is in terms of telling a story. Like most figure skaters, a pro wrestler comes out to tell their story through the moves, the element, and the crowds. Difference is the timing and the fact in figure skating, they have judges. In pro wrestling, fans are the judges.

I became a fan of pro wrestling officially around the same time I became a fan of Michelle Kwan which was around 1997 or 1998. Watched it until 2001 to focus on my high school studies. Didn't go back to it until 2004 when I read about Shawn Michaels competing again. Since March or April 2004, been watching these two sports with no end in sight.

Today, I consider myself a full fan of pro wrestling especially Japanese Pro Wrestling while at the same time consider myself more of a figure skating analyst and fan. Reason is because I know so much figure skating, so many moves, I actually can almost tell what each figure skater is doing. The only part I can't analyze though is Ice Dancing and that is because to me, it's much harder analyzing a Ice Dance performance than a Single skating performance or a Pairs Skating performance.

Today, I share this story in the hopes that one day, I can get on that ice and skate. I have my skates that I bought back in 2012. They've yet to be on the ice and I hope to one day have them feel that ice. Despite not being on the ice, wearing those skates feels so much different.

#World Skating Day #Figure Skating #Pro Wrestling #Evgeni Plushenko #Youtube

[rxbelling-hxrald]

🥃 :3c ~ sxturn-bxrs

Shot and a Fact || Accepting

Another glass shot of alcohol was picked up and swallowed, shaking himself a little after doing so. was he having trouble? or did it just not agree with him? regardless of the truth the demon-hog would continue this little game as he smiled. “Hmm? Yea I’m perfectly fine, three shots? Like that would be enough to put me down.”

“Mmm, another thing to bring up?” Pausing again as he tried to quickly think of something he didn’t mind too much bringing up, though it was now a little harder to think clearly.

“Not gonna deny, I know I’m not the easiest to get along with at times. Sometimes I feel like I’m a yo-yo. Weird comparison but its just constant ups and downs. I feel happy sometimes and others I’m just incredibly envious over most people.”

“Is it bad to feel that way over your friends or just people in general? Honestly its a part of the reason why I donned the nickname Omen....I mean, when you have some out there like Sonic, Shadow, Knuckles....my name doesn’t really feel like I’m in the same boat with how cool they are. So I figured Omen worked for me and it would make me sound a little more like I belonged here.”

A brief silence before once more the demon-hog shook his head yet again, perhaps trying to snap himself out of that current mindset, after all this was for fun. Not a time to start dwelling on personal issues he might have in terms of acceptance.

“Ahh listen to me droning on, ignore that rubbish. What if I told you about the time I went ice skating with a zone cop? I made a prat of myself, was me first time but y’know.”

#path_of_the_lost #sxturn-bxrs #memes

[switchflare7]

How You Can Start A Home Business And Make It Work

The Internet offers a widespread range of advice and knowledge that can aid your business. Learning the ins and outs of your home business is something that can be taught through the Internet. lutownica is part of the vast body of information that can help your home business. It's healthy to take short breaks over the course of your work day. Don't use your break time to take care of complicated personal matters, however. Do not start complex improvement projects or start long, personal calls. Break up your working day with short period of exercise or yardwork. Teaching others to do something you excel at can be a profitable business. Many people would rather learn privately rather than in groups. Most lessons can be taught from home. When you work at home, strive for the same type of self-care you would perform if you were working in a professional office environment. Your home business can give you a huge motivation boost, but if you neglect yourself in favor of your work, that can take its toll over time. You should take your showers in the morning, limit the amount of snacks you consume, and always make the time to get exercise. You can feel better about yourself and boost the way people look at you. You may be able to learn from other home business owners by joining an online forum. You can interact and relate to other people in the same situation this way. Most people who work from home face the same difficulties and challenges and discussing them is beneficial to all parties. Every home business should have a solid business plan. Even though your business might be small, you still need to outline what your business goals are, what resources you need, and what methods you will use to reach your goal. Seeing the goals of your business laid out in front of you can help you to stay focused. Any home business should utilize all of the tax deductions that are applicable to their situation. You can save a significant amount of money by claiming the right deductions. Accurately estimating the start up cost is vital to the successful launch and continued operation of your home based business. A home business will cost less to run than a traditional business, but you will still have to spend some money on it. If you calculate your home business expenses, you can figure out how to reduce the chances of losing money. To really make huge profits when running a home business, you need to take what are known as "prudent risks." When you are willing to try new things in your business, you will find more people interested in what you are doing, which eventually means a bigger bottom line! If you let yourself fall into a routine, you may miss a lot of new opportunities that come up. It can be easy to let your clients skate by when it comes to paying on time, especially when you are also trying to build relationships with them. However, you have to keep in mind that this can have a huge effect on your bottom line. Make sure that every invoice that you send out specifies your payment terms clearly. You should also have penalties for late payment that you feel comfortable enforcing. While conducting business in comfortable clothes may be fun at first, you may find yourself missing the professional attire required at your previous job. Replace these office interactions by going out to other social locations on a regular basis. Make sure you save your business receipts when running a home based business. A home business is a bona fide business, so business supplies and transportation expenses can be deducted from your business taxes. Save all of your receipts, as many of them can be used for deductions. If you do not save your receipts, your tax burden is going to be larger than it has to be. With everything you have learned in this article you can be more optimistic of the success of your home business. Take everything that you learned here and you can read over the advice again if you need to. Use each tip the way it was meant to be used and apply them to make improvements to your home business.

#lutownica