#this show kinda sort of got me out my funk

[beartusks]

give him two lips, like roses and clover

#ok so it was inspired by the moment that we see a bit inside his coat and it’s just. the universe in there #thought that was super cool #had a lot of fun with this! #this show kinda sort of got me out my funk #also proud of the audio!!!!!! #pls reblog yas yaas #the sandman #sandman #morpheus #neil gaiman #art #dc comics #dc

[jfleamont]

I have a kind of specific question that I'm hoping you and your followers could help me out with.

I'm writing my own version of the classic marauders fic, but I suck at writing the death eaters I don't enjoy writing antagonistic characters particularly and don't even have a super clear idea of who is who/ who fits to include(besides perhaps the main ones like Snape and regulus) especially since there's so little canon, so the majority is often fan made. of course they are essential to the plot though!

I want it to obviously be my own work, but I would really appreciate any pointers of where to start with these characters, even just a list of the right characters to start developing my own interpretations of.

this is obviously a very big ask, so any help or pointers anyone can offer to give me a nudge in the right direction I'd be so grateful for!

Hello! Sorry for the late reply, I had two exams and I have two more coming up but I've been dying to reply to this ask since you sent it :)

I'll preface this by saying that, much like you, I'm really not into these kind of characters and I don't enjoy writing them, nor do I have the skill to do so. I have only written one-shots and none of them had any Death Eaters in them; however, I do have a WIP (that I started almost one year ago and that I plan on finishing sometime this summer) that's going to be around 10k and it will most certainly feature those kind of characters, so this is actually really helpful for me too and it might help me get out of this funk since I haven't worked on that WIP in months.

That said, let's get to work!

The first name that comes to mind is Lucius Malfoy. We have quite a bit of info about him in canon, and I believe he's 6 or 7 years older than the Marauders. He was a prefect and was in the Slug Club, and was friends with Snape for the brief time they were at Hogwarts together. After leaving Hogwarts he married Narcissa Black, another pureblood, got a job at the ministry and at one point he met Voldemort. If you want to write him into your story, depending on the year your fic takes place, you could show him taking Snape under his wing and giving speeches about blood purity. I think by then he was already a prefect so he probably abused his power and gave detentions to Gryffindors and Muggleborns/Halfbloods for no reason; I don't know if he'd use violence or hexes, because he's far too diplomatic for that. I think he was really good at convincing people, he manipulated them and made them do the dirty work for him. He'd occasionally hex people for fun but due to his upbringing, he knew better than picking petty fights in the hallways, and he strikes me as the kind of person who was very driven and who thought about the bigger picture. He had, after all, a place in the wizarding world by right of birth, and his family was quite openly in favour of blood purity and all that racist bullshit. Snape, on the other hand, had always been picked on and he learnt at a very young age how to defend himself (and was easily triggered). Lucius didn't need to. He didn't have Snape's rage and didn't want revenge. If you want to start your story when the Marauders are a bit older (16 or 17), you could say that the wannabe Death Eaters at Hogwarts sort of idolised him because he was so young but already in Voldemort's inner circle; furthermore, you could have him actually recruit students, and have them take Unbreakable vows, teach them the Unforgivable Curses and make them get the Dark Mark. They could meet in Hogsmeade (since he's no longer a student), kinda like Harry does with his first DA meeting.

Barty Crouch Junior is another Death Eater that comes to mind and it could be an interesting character to work with. He was at Hogwarts during the 70s and roughly the same age as James & his friends. He came from a pureblood family, but I don't think they were the kind of people who actually wanted Muggleborns dead; after all, Crouch Senior was already a prominent figure in politics, and he was head of the DMLE (Department of Magical Law Enforcement). But he did have an aggressive approach towards criminals, which partly explains his son's obsession with violence. Barty Junior also had a very complicated relationship with his father, a man who was probably incapable of showing affection and was too busy working to take care of his son. I think Barty hated him but wanted to impress him at the same time and, in a very fucked up way, he did those horrible things because he wanted his father to pay attention to him. We don't know why he chose to become a DE, but my impression is that he was a very lonely, insecure kid and he found a sense of belonging at Hogwarts, something I don't think he ever felt when he was at home. Whether he joined the very people his father was after out of spite or not, it doesn't really matter. What matters is that he did believe in those things by the time he was older. He was also very intelligent - he disguised himself as Moody for nearly a year - albeit highly unpredictable. He was delirious and insane in some scenes, but overall quite reasonable when he pretended to be Moody, so he could have had a personality disorder, but if you want to write about that you should do some research and be careful, because associating villains with mental illnesses could do more harm than good if not done well, and it's a slippery slope. All I'm gonna say is that he definitely had some daddy issues, that's for sure.

Then of course we have Regulus, whose family was very much against Muggleborns. We know quite a lot about the Black household thanks to Sirius, and there are different headcanons floating around about the kind of bond the two brothers had. In my opinion, Regulus looked up to his brother and was envious of him: even at eleven years old, Sirius had already made up his mind about his parents' view of the world and wanted nothing to do with them. It shows that he was an independent thinker, and I think Regulus wondered for a long time how he could do that so easily. Was Regulus not strong enough? Or did he feel like he didn't have a choice? Because Sirius had James, so he wasn't completely alone. Regulus had no one. Obviously, I know he did have a choice, and he shared his parents' (and Voldemort's) political views. When Voldemort hurt Kreacher he turned against him, which is very interesting and unusual, mainly because pureblood families do not have any sort of respect or affection towards elves, while Regulus clearly did.

As for the others, I think Mulciber and Avery are mentioned by Lily while they were in Hogwarts, and they're the ones who cursed Mary Macdonald (this is mentioned in SWM). I think they went to Azkaban after the first war, unlike Evan Rosier (mentioned during Karkaroff's trial) who was killed when they tried to arrest him.

I suggest you also look into the Sacred Twenty-Eight - a list of pureblood families from which the Potters were excluded because they had been pro-muggle for a couple of generations, I think - to get an idea and maybe an inspiration for an original DE character.

So, if you want to include Death Eaters in your fic, you could make a list of possible characters and mention their relationships and friendships; you could make one of them really good at dueling, and another one good at flying (and make them James' rival during Quidditch matches). Death Eaters were Voldemort's followers first, and friends second, so it makes sense that there was a hierarchy: you can choose one of them as a leader, and the others could be the minions, the brawns and the brains (Snape would probably be the latter since he was smart and actually invented some hexes that were very useful to the DEs). And if you want to make things even more interesting, some of them could also be from different Hogwarts houses (not the ones I've mentioned because they're all canonically Slytherins), and they could also be girls!

If you want more ideas, there's a 2014 film called 'The Riot Club' (which I didn't like to be honest, but that's not the point lol) that explores the violent behaviour that often occurs in these kind of social circles; and while you're at it, you could also research 'hazing', a phenomenon that is often associated with fraternities and sororities in college that, while pretty disturbing, could also make for a much more compelling story.

Historically, boarding schools have often been described as toxic environments: for the majority of the year these young kids are separated from their families and while this is beneficial for some, for others it's very dangerous. During the most vulnerable period of their lives, they have to rely on authority figures that do not, however, provide the love and affection that parents do; this creates a dissonance, and kids either isolate themselves, or create their own 'families', and some are more dysfunctional than others (i.e. the Marauders vs. Snape's gang).

This is all I could think about, but as always people are welcome to add their own thoughts and headcanons!

Hope this helps, and feel free to ask me whatever you want :)

#oof this was a long one #was gonna put this in the jily tag but it has nothing to do with them #but i also don't wanna tag the DEs I mentioned bc I don't want to attract their fans #I loved talking about this tho #very interesting and i'm definitely gonna think about this a lot in the future #mainly bc it makes their world even more fucked up and i'm even more mad at dumbledore #harry potter #marauders #marauders era #mwpp #mpp #death eaters #jfleamont rambles #asks

[nellynee]

Trollstopia Blindblogging: episode 7b: Buckin’ Branch

Really can’t help themselves can they? The dressing is nice, but it’s still a “Branch can’t catch a damn break” episode. perfectly enjoyable across the board, from humor to song to lesson. Just... perfectly fine. Competent. Branch and Country centric for those who care. 3.5 out of 5 take it or leave it. 

(Well shoot, Tumblr crashed on me before I could save a draft at about the 5 minute mark of the episode, so it’s gonna be a little trimmed down but we’ll try again shall we?)

if that title isn’t a minced oath I don’t know what is

Thank you, James Cordon, for that lovely, ear piercing note. I legit had to turn down the volume it was actually painful

Noted, we’ve seen this valley before. I’m not sure if this is supposed to be a regular hub of budding commerce, or if it’s just that they can’t think of a good place for pop village scenes other than “A valley” but it is noted.  seeing some hand crafted looking pottery... some clothing...a Funk Troll peddling pies.... that Creek lookalike in the bg....

Cocoa to go go

I mean I heard it before they even said it but they still said it

Branch going all Indiana Jones is so flipping cute. Just imagining sad little Baby grey Branch using it as one of his few forms of play alone... in the woods. OW

Biggie you have an extender arm for hair.... Biggie

fucking look Branch did it Biggie 

Ok Trolls you win my new Starbucks order is “Cocoa to go go”

Do I think “Cutie Patootie” is Holly Darlin common vernacular? Yes. Do I think Holly genuinely would be down to clown if Branch showed even a smidge of reciprocation? Also yes.

For real though ever since Satin and Chenille got hot under the collar over a wet and shirtless Branch in TBGO I’ve hard headcanoned that Branch has the Troll equivalent of very fine bone structure. He’s got a lot of room to clean up, but is also kind of just objectively attractive as a baseline. 

Oh he’s weak to being called special I’ma cry!

“Does that answer your question?” “uuuuuuuh?” that kinda confused shrug on Branch was really well animated. Like there’s a whole ass rotation in that

Branch’s outfit is so stupid cute I love it! He has no shoooooes!

Poppy looks like she’s about to bust a nut trying not to laugh

That’s so mean Poppy he’s just looking for the validation and sense of community he lacks in Pop village! 

For real though I think Branch would find something in Country that he wouldn’t find anywhere else. Not the connection to “sad music” ala the movie. Or at least not necessarily. Really I believe that all the tribes, specifically all but the “traumatized in such a way that they’ve created a culture of faux and aggressive happiness to combat it” Pop Trolls have multifacets to their music that could speak to others including Branch’s complexity. Country was abrasive and sorta violent and a little vitriolic when we saw them in the movie. I like to imagine that among all that aggressive southern style comfort and hospitality is a lot of passive aggressiveness. And from that comes a more friendly sort of ribbing and sarcasm and jabs as inside jokes. It’s using antagonism as inclusiveness. I think he’d find real connections there, and an ability to explore a side of himself that’s shut down very quickly in Pop village

I swear to god if Gust or Holly call someone or thing else special and break Branch’s heart I’m gonna break them over my knee

A very good point for the young'uns. Just because Poppy has called Branch special before doesn't mean it’s got the same meaning to him. Context matters

Her look of horror when she almost calls that troll special is hilarious

“There’s no way he’s using that lingo right....” “Nope”. That’s a big part of the humor of this show. Most shows would write his vernacular off as “lol southern sayings are so long and complicated you can’t even parse them isn’t that funny?” But this show looks suspension of disbelief right in the eyes at this really obvious not jokes and goes “That was weird? Wasn’t that weird?” And yes it was. Even if you don’t laugh, you will get a sense of... comradery from this show? It’s a big point of why it’s been so enjoyable

Pinata lassoing, greased balloon pig catching, adora-bull hugging (aka bull riding). These are all super cute and creative. I especially love the greased pig balloons

Branch at fluffy: awwwwwwww. me at Branch: awwwwwww

It’s Ok Branch. It happens to a lot of guys. Just a little performance pressure is all.

Oh noooooo pooor baby nooooo why were there three of them?

Branch’s musses up hair is a look and I’m here for it

That's a much milder panicked note James Cordon thank you

oh no.....

Gust.... real quick I need you to come meet someone.... real quick don’t worry this is only gonna hurt a lot for a very long time

Ok that is cute tho Biggie’s little hat and his little excited attitude it’s not his fault

That was legit a really good action scene! Branch backing out when it got to much instead of doubling down and causing more trouble, Fluffy’s design, the lack of physical comedy, Fluffy’s little smile at that smooch. 

“I know, I’m just as shocked as you are.” Pffffft ok yeah that got me

Me: furiously scribbling Country notes into my “Biggie is a lullaby Troll headcanons”

James Cordon you are hereby revoked of your cowboy accent privileges

Not what I was expecting for a lesson. Most usually settle for “Yeah I’m not good at this thing I was passionate about and other people are and that’s ok” But shifting over to “Just because it takes you more work than other’s to get the same results doesn’t mean it’s not worth while” is a refreshing take. I do think that a tiny bit of rework, just a few new lines or some shuffling (Gust or Holly mentioning trying again next year, how they’re sorry he didn’t have a lot of time to train, mentioning Biggie’s experience with animals...) could have made it very solid and cohesive, but it does actually work unlike some lessons

#Trollstopia #dreamworks trolls #Branch #Holly Darling #gust tumbleweed #liveblogging

[anosci]

(271-285 albums etc that I’ve listened to this year, copied from twitter) (now with art. [1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] [9] [10] [11] [12] [13] [14] [15] [16] [17] [18] [19] [20])

names and thoughts below cut

271/ Autechre - AE_LIVE 2022- (2023) condensing thoughts, using fan titles: "corcine" one of my favs overall!!! london_b!!! the transition here is amazing "osin PM" im very happy to see the ceramic percussion return! s/o2 "T2" for turning a so-so intro into a fav track of mine. "Drane 3"!!!

---

272/ VA - Bomb Rush Cyberfunk OST (2023) this truly catches the feel of JSR but with a fresh glisten. it keeps surprising me. some trax are perfect for the game but not smth id listen to later. some keepers: "Scraped On The Way Out", "JACK DA FUNK", "Spectres", "Precious Thing",,

---

273/ Datsik - Sensei (2016) some nice wob sludge "Nasty" is the standout to me, with the title track being a close second. overall just ok tho imo

---

274/ Alon Mor - Associative Delusions (2016) absolutely wild. what is going on here. "Low Sugar" did mazedude write this? wacky vibe mixing "Vacom" the snare + bass thing here is something ive long craved. its not super crazy but im super into it. fascinatingly cool

---

275/ SDEM - ZNS (2020) a world tour of sound design ive only heard from autechre before. "Flargunnsto" hell yes!!!! the texture! the perc! fav? "skittern" holy shit what a texture "PSKWDIM" showing a hip hop skam styling "SwiriswiriswiriS" gets a mention too. vibes.

---

276/ Machinedrum - Human Energy (2016) lush bangers assorted thoughts: "Spectrum Sequence" oh holy shit!!! man "Isometrix" hits me right "Dos Puertas" rly good example of what i love about machinedrum "Do It 4 U" chords as "perc" so many good vibes here

---

277/ EPROM, ZEKE BEATS - Humanoid.rmx (2023) a few thoughts: "Chee.rmx" is nothing like i imagined. basically a new song??? good tho. "sumthin sumthin.rmx" banger. second fav? then the regular track: that C64 snare in the non-remix thing really feels good. fav i think.

---

278/ Noxin - Dream Sequence (2022) it's "like ae" but entirely its own thing. rly good two specific favs: "All the Italics, in the Air" delicately handling intricate machinery. meditative in a way. "Expansively, Dreaming Big" god this vibe is impeccable. lush chords.

---

279/ patten - Ψ (2016) kinda dives into some messy soundscapes im not a fan of but has some cool tracks, like "Used 2 b" and its spooky vibe and the stuttery textures in "Yyang". rly wishing there was more of "Pixação" as the ending of that track = the best bars here imo

---

280/ Jameszoo - Fool (2016) this is… playful. that's the word to use here. but also. f.ex, "Lose" is very spaced out. specifically the "can't quite focus on a bright day" spaced out. the reverb & arrangement on "Soup" has that effect too. pretty wild to capture that feeling

---

281/ Fearful & Mtwn - Exordium (2021) heavy and industrial. like uk…. grime? im not sure actually. it's got grit. just LISTEN to "Obliteration" massive.

---

282/ VA - Genome (2021) way more of a mixed bag than i was anticipating, at least in the degrees which it vibes with me. i think it works best when its got That Beat with wild textures. so, "Lysine Acetylation", "Mitochondria"… "liminal flux" prolly my fav.

---

283/ Fiesta Soundsystem - Sinking (2023) i believe they call this jungle ist massive? loving the lush soundscape in "residuae.ls" "diaphphanousdiaphophresis" reaches more into breakcore. ends way too soon :( "3rd aspect" dives into that slower tempo im wont to enjoy

---

284/ VA - Genome 2 (2022) mixed bag etc etc a few thoughts / highlights: "Multidimensional Dot" i do like my chrome cylinders :) "Atom Smasher" bringing that late 00s beat 🥰 "Znr" i adore that gantzy texture! one of my favs i think

---

285/ Henry Greenleaf - Dog Eared (2023) a sort of lush nightclub selection. "Bubble Trouble" god that's cool. tipper ass. "Calpohol" and title track are basically just techno slappers

---

(next page)

#media thread

[no-one-fuck-a-man]

Berry Blues

Season One

Part Twenty-One - (Funk) An Ode To Punch Jesse In The Face

Quinn Fabray x Reader

Summary: A week filled with depression travelled around the group. Soon spread to the cheerleaders and their coach. The only way to rectify it? Singing apparently.

Word Count: 8,378

WARNINGS: Argument, wanting a fight, horror movie

-----

Your sister had grabbed you. Literally grabbed your arm and dragged you to the auditorium, looking worry stricken, as some of your friends followed behind.

Once you had entered the large room, you headed towards the rest of your gathered friends, intending to stand beside Quinn like you were found to do a lot recently. But instead was stopped by Santana. The girl tugging for you to sit beside her upon the wall everyone was leaning against. Quinn watched on as you jumped up beside the girl, brows scrunched and a pang of jealousy shot through her. Not liking how close Santana was to you. How easily she was able to get you to stay by her side.

"Ah, God! What is it with people and pulling me today?"

Your eyes focused upon the people gathered upon the stage, all decked out in black and blue.

Carmel High Colours

"Jesse?" your sister asked with a scoff. When the boy stepped forward, away from the crowd, "What are you doing up there with them?"

"I've transferred back to Carmel High, Rachel," he stated smugly.

'Oh, I've gotta get some snakes'

"I'm sorry that it's come to this, but you guys were awful to me. You never accepted me. You never listened to my clearly superior ideas."

'And a bag big enough to fit him in'

"Why here in our auditorium?" Finn asked, stepping forward.

"The blogs and chat rooms say that we're finished and that you guys are ripe to topple us. We just wanted to show you a little something that we came up with a few days ago to see if you agree with that assessment."

"Oh, please God no, I love this song," you mumbled to yourself as you heard the opening tune sound out through the room.

Ooh, let's go

Steve walks warily down the street

With his brim pulled way down low

Ain't no sound

But the sound of his feet

Machine guns ready to go

Are you ready, hey?

Are you ready for this

Are you hangin'

Oh the edge of your seat?

Out of the doorway the bullets rip

To the sound of the beat

Yeah

You glared at the group so easily using your school's stage for their performance.

If you had the ability to kill someone with one look of your eyes, they would be up in flames.

Jesse, more so.

You kinda wished it was true.

Another one bites the dust

Another one bites the dust

How do you think I'm gonna get along

Without you when you're gone?

You took me for everything that I had

And kicked me out on my own

Are you happy, are you satisfied?

How long can you stand the heat?

Out of the doorway the bullets rip

To the sound of the beat

Look out

You hated to admit it, but their performance was starting to fill you with some sort of anxious dread.

But you tried to think critically.

Push that feeling down. Knowing that it was just them trying to psych you out before the big competition. And you weren't about to let them win without a fight.

Another one bites the dust

The girl that held on to Jesse's waist gave a scoffed laugh once the performance was over.

"Thanks for letting us borrow your auditorium, guys. It's quaint."

"Unlike your personality," you shot back.

'Where was the nearest lake?'

Now making your way back to the choir room, with your down-trodden team, Artie began talking.

"It's a Carmel High tradition. They psych out the competition a few weeks before the big show. They call it a "funkification", meaning they show us what they've got, and we spiral into a deep, black funk."

"And is them breaking someone's heart normal, too?" you asked, voice hard and telling just how much you wanted to smack Jesse in the face right now as you walked with your arm thrown across your sister's shoulders. Mercedes, rubbing her back.

"No," the boy replied slowly, "That's new."

"Yeah, yeah, we used to do the same things to the other football teams." Finn nodded. "Not the heartbreaking thing, though. We used to try to get inside their head before the big game, pull little pranks to intimidate them."

"Yeah, well, the difference was, our football team sucked. Those guys are golden."

"It's not just your football team that sucked, buddy." You shook your head at the boy.

"Come on," Kurt began, "Keep your heads up, guys. It's gonna take more than that to get us into a funk," the boy trailed off, discouraged, once he stepped foot into the trashed choir room, tanking in its state.

It looked like streamers for a party.

Thick streamers.

For a very sad party.

'Okay. Mood starting to get worse now'

"I don't think this is good for the environment."

---

You were... semi-useless as the team cleaned up the room.

But at least you weren't as bad as Santana, who was just standing around watching as everyone else did all of the work, filing her nails.

Brittany, coming in as a close second, along with Rachel, with the way she was trying to roll the toilet paper back onto its tube. Your sister, doing the same but around her hand.

But you were fine coming in at third place of the 'not helping' crew.

There you were, spinning around in place, arms down at your sides, as you gathered up all of the toilet paper around you, having it wrap around your body. Encasing yourself in the stuff.

"I feel so violated," Tina said as she heaved arm fulls of the paper towards the bin Artie was manning, "It's like someone broke into our home."

"Look, it was just a lame little prank. And the fact that they're trying to get to us means that we got them spooked," your teacher reasoned.

"Uh hu, Mr Schue." Mercedes came over next, dumping her own mound of paper into the trash. "They aren't afraid of anything. That number they did was fantastic. You know, which doesn't make any sense. They had all that equipment. How did they even get in?"

"Well, I gave them all keys."

Enter Sue.

Followed by a few classmen.

As soon as you saw the woman, you split yourself away from the toilet paper, with one single jumping-jack. It fell to the floor in a heap. Only a few stray pieces clinging onto your body.

"Helped them do a soundcheck over the weekend."

"Oh, well, of course, you did."

"Hey, this way, fellas." She directed the students towards the far wall of the choir room. "Let's punch out this wall here. That'll open up the space a little bit."

"Sue, what are you doing?"

"I can't talk to you now, William. Drafting class is helping me redecorate around here."

"It already is," you joked, gesturing around you to the paper still in every corner of the room.

"You see. I have Nationals over the weekend, and I expect to return with a comically large first-place trophy for which I have absolutely no room in my trophy case," the coach explained, "As soon as you hurry up and lose at Regionals, this choir room will become my official. Trophy. Annes." She then turned back to the students helping her. "You know what it has to look like? Elvis's gold record room at Graceland. Except I'll be wanting far fewer morbidly obese white women waddling around and crying."

"Sue, get out of my room."

She ignored your advancing teacher's words. Instead, choosing to address the team.

"Gle Clubbers, for those of you whose hearing has not been damaged by massive doses of Accutane, listen up." She pointed to her ear, in the other arm held a large trophy. "In a few weeks, Glee Club will be finished. Now, how do I know that? Well, I recently checked the odds with my Vegas bookie, who told me that you're 40-to-1 underdogs at regionals."

"Like that truly means anything other than we could win people some big bucks."

"You are going to lose, and your dreams will be crushed."

"Sue, can I see your trophy?"

"Sure, Will. Hope and dream," she said, letting the man take the cheerleading award from her hands as if allowing him to hold it was some form of charity.

To her.

You suspected it was.

The trophy, soon enough, was smashed into pieces. Flying from where it connected against the wall and across the shiny floor.

The class jumped.

Especially the blonde girl, holding a broom, by your side.

You being the only one to pump their fists with vigour and yell out, "Yes!"

"We dropped your trophy, Sue."

"Hell yeah, we did."

That just made you so happy.

"You know, for me, trophies are like herpes. You can try to get rid of them, but they just keep coming. You know why? Sue Sylvester has hourly flare-ups of burning, itchy, highly contagious talent."

"Gross."

"Enjoy your last few days here. This room is mine."

Watching as she and the students she led into the room left, you exclaimed excitedly, "Let's go kill the rest of her trophies!"

---

You were sitting in the chair behind Quinn, talking with Matt, when Mr Schue came into the room the next day.

"All right, guys, today I want to talk to you about regrets. Who has some?"

Rachel, who was sat at the piano, laying her head upon her bent arm, rose up slightly as she answered the man's question.

"Giving my heart to Jesse, just to have it crushed like the stage floor of a performance at 'Stomp'."

Quinn was next to tell her regret. "Thinking "trust me" was a sensible birth control option."

"Letting Rachel convince me not to put Jess in a bag filled with snakes and throw him into a lake. Like the Romans did."

"We all have them." Mr Schue nodded. "I just finalized my divorce."

"Oh, so the crazy lady's finally gone?"

"I regret living in a relationship that wasn't working, letting her out me in these deep funks and not fighting back."

"Besides creeping us out, why are you telling us this?" Santana asked, from where she lay across three of the maroon chairs at the back of the room.

"Because if we lose to Vocal Adrenaline at Regionals, none of us are gonna regret it. We will have given it our best shot, and we won't look back. But we will regret letting them get the best of us before the competition, which is why we need to hit them back just like they hit us."

"So, you want us to T.P. their choir room?" Quinn asked slowly.

The man nodded his head from side to side.

"Whatever the better, cooler version of that is, like, uh." He gasped softly when an idea popped into his head. "Maybe, maybe we should steal their school statue."

You looked at the man, confused.

Was your teacher really trying to help his students pull a prank on another high school?

There's got to be something in his teaching contract against that, right?

"Their school statue is a giant bronze of a great white shark eating a seal pup," Kurt spoke up from beside Mercedes, "It weighs three tons."

"Awesome." Matt nudged you. "What? It is," you then added, "I'm still down for us doing it Roman style."

Not even gracing your "suggestion" with a reply, Mr Schuester carried on.

"Okay, well, how about this one?"

You rolled your eyes as your teacher continued on with his idiotic prank suggestions.

Looking over your shoulder, you spotted Santana, still laying upon the seats, smiling at you. She raised her hand, waving a pen between her fingers knowingly. You nodded at her before turning to face the front of the class once more.

You were still trying to get her to admit if she actually thought about someone else when she was with you.

And if so. Who?

---

"Whatever it is, my answers no."

"How do you do that?" Finn asked as you closed the door of your locker, knowing they were there before either of them even spoke. Turning to Puck, he asked him, "How do they do that?"

"Listen, Y/N-"

"I thought I just said 'no'?"

"We want you to help us prank Carmel High," Finn said, quickly before you could cut him off like you did Puck.

Now that... that caught your attention.

"I'm listening. What have you got in mind?"

"We're gonna slash their tires," Puck said, nodding his head with that arrogant smirk he does.

"Yeah..." you drew the word out, then shook your head, "No. I'd rather not get suspended, thanks."

"We won't get suspended." You could tell the boy had rolled his eyes just by the tone of his voice, as they both were quick to follow you down the hall.

"Well, then I'm not about to pay for the damages." They had to stop walking, suddenly, when you span to face them. "You boys have fun. But count me out of this one. I ain't having that on my record."

---

Everyone, it seems, was even more so depressed during the next Glee Club meeting.

Finn and Puck all pouty after having been caught slashing Vocal Adrenaline's tires. And were now forced to get jobs to pay them back.

You were sat beside Quinn, and like your sister, you had your feet propped up upon the chair in front of you. Arms crossed over your chest, the blondes head almost laying on your shoulder. It only raising when your teacher strode through the door, heading straight for the whiteboard to write something across it.

" Funk. " The man turned to face the class. "Use it in a sentence. Come on! Rachel?" he prompted when no one spoke.

"This cheese smells funky."

"That's because it's "fromunda" cheese."

You cringed to yourself at the disgusting thing the boy just said.

How women like him, you have no clue.

"Shut it, Puckerman!"

"You tell him, Rach." You nodded for your sister.

"Okay, okay." Mr Schue rose his hands, trying to keep the peace. "I was thinking more along the lines of, "Vocal Adrenaline has sure put us all in a funk"."

"I'm so depressed I've worn the same outfit twice this week," Kurt said softly.

"What is I told you I knew how we could shove it right back down their throats?"

"I'd say, "you shouldn't be thinking that way about minors"."

Quinn turned to you. "Get your mind out of the gutter."

"New Directions is about to make their funk the P-funk. We are gonna get funked up. The only way to do that is if we beat them at Regionals. Vocal Adrenaline has never once done a funk number. They're a machine, a collective, synthesized, soulless beat."

"Not helping here, Mr Schue."

"Funk is soul meets anger. It's passion, and its emotion. And Vocal Adrenaline doesn't perform with any."

Glancing over to Quinn, you could tell that she was intrigued by what the man was saying. Spotting her nod her head softly.

"I want you guys to turn McKinley High into, Funkytown," he finished by singing the last word.

"You want us to play Lipps Inc. throughout the school like Sue did with Madonna?"

"You guys can relax," Mercedes told the team, "I got this one covered."

"Cool," Mr Schue nodded.

But that only got the girl by your side more worked up. So much so for her to call out to the man.

"Hold on a second. I- I want a chance to get funky, too."

You had to make sure you held in your snort or risk getting hurt by the blonde. Managing it -only just- but a smile still drew across your face, all the while your friends laughed.

Mercedes looked over at her. "Good one, Quill. It even sounds funny when you say it."

Your smile tightened at that.

You had to admit that was true. However, you also thought it was quite adorable.

"You said funk was about soul and anger," she slowly spoke to the teacher, ignoring Mercedes and her words entirely, "I have plenty of both. Look at me. Look at my life. I'm furious !"

"I can see that." You nodded. "I'd be furious, too. But, you know, if you're that mad, I can just hold Puck down, and you can-" You cut yourself off, miming stomping onto the boy, with your risen leg, as you felt him glare holes into the back of your skull.

Quinn breathed humorously through her nose, shaking her head at your joke.

"Let's be honest. When white people try to be funky, you end up with 'K.C. and the Sunshine Band'," Mercedes said with a laugh.

"I lobe 'Boogie Shoes'." Artie smiled from beside her.

You nodded. "This is a pretty good song."

"Mercedes' racism aside-"

"That's not really- Okay..." you trailed off, knowing she wasn't listening to you, as Mercedes rolled her eyes at Quinn.

"-I will have something prepared tomorrow."

"All right." Mr Schue slapped his hands together, then pointed at the girl sitting beside you, "Quinn goes first."

"You want me to walk you to class?" you asked as everyone left, and Mr Schuester called for Rachel to meet him in his office.

"Please."

---

Before you knew it, it was the next Glee Club lesson, and you were all waiting to see what Quinn would do.

"Okay." Mr Schue clapped from the front of the class. "Quinn, it's your day to show us your funky side. So, take it away."

"For some of us," the girl started before she left her seat, "Just simply getting to class takes a little bit longer. When you're pregnant, you're responsible for two lives, and you're walking down the hallway oppressed by the man."

'Oh... God...'

"Hearing people call you fat."

Kurt leaned over to where you sat between him and Santana.

"Why did you let her do this?" he whispered.

"Uh, first of all, she's a woman, not a dog. I can't control her. And secondly, she didn't tell me what she had planned... which, now I see why."

"Sometimes it hurts." You had to stop your laugh at her little foot stomp, just as a gang of other pregnant women streamed through the open door. "Sometimes, you have to stop."

'Oh, you're telling me'

'Every five minutes, she needs to take a break from walking'

"And hold that precious life and say "no"."

Oh, so she didn't mean it in the literal sense.

... okay.

"This is offensive," Artie stated, "Who are these girls?"

"We're the 'Unwed Mothership Connection'-"

"The what?" you asked, then turned to Puck, who sat on the other side of Santana, "Did you get those girls pregnant, too?"

"-And that's what we're here to sing about," Quinn finished the lead-up to her song before Puckerman could shoot something back at you.

This is a man's world

'Oh, God' You rested your head in your hand. 'This is gonna be painful to watch'

This is a man's world

But it wouldn't be nothin'

Nothin'

Without a woman of a girl

You see

Man made the cars

To take us over the road

Man made the train

To carry the heavy load

You leant over Santana's lap, unseeing to the blonde girl singing watching you. Hand holding on to the smooth skin of her leg, to brace yourself, all to whisper your advice over to the buzz haired boy.

"Better sleep with one eye open for a while, buddy."

Man made the boat for the water

Like Noah made the ark

"What the fuck are they doing?" you asked yourself in a quiet whisper. Eyes unmoving from the pregnant girls circling their heavy swollen bellies around one anothers.

This is a man's

Man's, man's world

But it wouldn't be nothin'

Or a girl

Quinn shot over a glare when she, once again, spotted you leaning over Santana to talk to Puck.

"Sleep with both eyes open."

You startled in your seat, when the girls began thrusting their pregnant bellies into the air, putting emphasis on them.

"That cannot be safe."

Man thinks about the little baby girls

And the baby boys

Thankfully the girls stopped soon after they started.

Which was lucky for you.

Because you thought you were about to go into a panic-induced heart attack because of it.

And after man make everything

Everything he can

"Oh, my God," you breathed, "It's a pregnant can-can."

Santana and Kurt had to hide their snorts beside you.

Do you know the man make money?

He make money

To buy

From other men

To but from other men

This is a man's world

But it wouldn't have been nothin'

Nothin'

Not one little thing

Nothin'

Without a woman of a girl

He's lost

In bitterness

He's lost

Lost somewhere out there

In loneliness

Everyone stepped down to hug the girl and show her some love after a short round of applause.

All but Mercedes, that is.

Who was still sat in her seat, arms crossed and an 'you've-got-to-be-fucking-kidding-me' face on.

Oh, this was gonna be "fun".

—

If you thought that day was nuts, you definitely weren't expecting a day like this one.

With your backpack flung over your shoulder, you strode through the halls of your school, fully intending on arriving to class on time today, like you were most days.

But you were derailed when you spotted a weeping Santana. Her hair was a mess and down from her usual ponytail, still wearing her Cheerios uniform and with a box of tissues pressed against her chest.

Your eyebrows flexed in the middle at her... well, her everything.

"San?" you asked, stepping closer to the girl.

Only to hear her softly whimper, "Daddy. Daddy."

Eyes widening in shock, you jolted back from her slightly. Hastily looking over your shoulder to see if you could spot anyone there who could fit the bill, only to come up empty.

Turning back to the unusually emotional girl, you proceeded to ask, "Is something wrong with your dad?" She softly shook her head. "Were you calling me that?" you then asked, pointing to your chest. Only to get another shake of the girl's head in reply.

Curiously watching after her as she pushed away from the cream coloured lockers, still sobbing as she moved, raising her arm beside her head out of pure devastation. Walking until she reached her destination, just across the hall, at the small cornered wall, sliding down it until she sat cross-legged on the floor.

That was when you noticed the dishevelled appearances of all the other cheerleaders. The only one who didn't seem to be affected by any of this, being Kurt.

You were quick to crouch down in front of her, placing a hand upon one of her cocked knees.

"Santana, are you okay?"

"Y/N?"

At the call of your name, you looked behind you to find Mr Schue looking down at you both. Wearing the same look of curious worry etched across his face as it was yours.

"What's wrong with Santana?"

"I have absolutely no idea." You shook your head at the man, hand coming out to reiterate your point.

"Well..." he trailed off, "You keep an eye on Santana. I'm gonna try and find out what's going on."

You nodded your head at the man just before he could take off and ask the only sane-looking cheerleader his questions.

Sighing softly, you turned your attention back to the still crying Santana. Raising your palm and placing it lightly upon her cheek, bringing her to look you in your eyes.

"Hey, it's going to be okay, okay?"

"No," she blubbered with a shake of her head.

"Why not?"

You knew with the way that she just broke down into more sobs, pulling another tissue from the box now in her lap, that you weren't about to get any clear answers from her while she was in this state.

"Okay, come on, you," you muttered, reaching under her armpits to heave her up from the school floor. Only gaining weak whimpers of protests, but still, she never struggled against your hold. Allowing you to pull her into your side and start helping her to walk down the hall, "Let's find Brittany. Brittany will make you feel better."

You sure fucking hoped Brittany would help her feel better.

—

Brittany did not make her feel better.

Finding Brittany only gave you two weepy cheerleaders to take care of.

Which is, exactly, what you were you walked into the choir room later that day. Two girl's leaning into either of your sides, one with a backwards uniform. Helping direct them towards some free seats, as Finn spoke to your teacher. Obviously dressed for a performance, matching with Puck.

"Mr Schue, Puck and I would like to show the class the true meaning of funk with a little help from our special guest, Mercedes."

You would have joined in with the light applause and cheering the girl got, if it weren't for the two girls leaning into your sides. Even as they sat in their own chairs, apparently needing you to remain upright.

Puckerman saw this and smirked over at you, wiggling his brows at the girls curling into your neck, obviously thinking you were in for the time of your life later that day.

And while yes, you would never say no to that if given the chance. You were still disgusted by the boy, given the girl's states at the time, which you clearly showed with an intense glare and a cock of your head. Making him quickly add on to the introduction of their performance as Mercedes walked in between the two boys.

"Fasten your seat belts, people. It's gonna be a funky ride."

You rolled your eyes at his words before the music started playing.

Yeah

Can you feel it, baby?

Come on, swing it

Com on, swing it

'What?'

Come on, swing it

Come on, swing it

Once again, a deathly glare overtook your face, directed at Puck. Silently warning him not to come any closer, as he was flinging his arms around like that, looking like a shitty boxer.

Yo, it's about that time

To bring forth the rhythm

And the rhyme

Imma get mine so get yours

I wanna see sweat comin' out your pores

On the house tip I'm swingin' this

Strictly hip-hop boy, I ain't singin' this

Bringing; this to the entire nation

Black, white, red, brown, feel the vibration

Vibration

Come on, feel the vibration

There was one good thing that came from this "funk" performance, however. It seemed to incredibly brighten your sister's mood, along with Santanas.

The other Berry, smiling brighter than she had since this week began, one of your own, albeit smaller, tugging at the corner of your lips. You were just so relieved to see her smile again after seeing her so down.

The smile on Santana's face was only the start of her lifting mood, the girl slowly raised her head from the side of your neck slightly, watching the performance with focused eyes.

The other cheerleader, however, was still as sullen as ever.

Face still buried into your neck, as she watched them sing, -or rather, rap- frown tugging at her lips, almost looking like a child's sad pout.

It's such a good vibration

It's such a sweet sensation

The vibration's good like Sunkist

Many wanna know who done this

Pucky Puck and I'm here to move you

Your eyes rolled into the back of your head at that, mouth opening, unable to stop the breathy chuckle that poured from it.

'Pucky puck, really ?'

Rhymes will groove you

And I'm here to prove to you

A tidal wave of relief blew through you when you heard your sisters and Santana's joyous laughter flow from them. Brittany, now watching on in shock.

Which... in all honesty, kind of confused you.

But you just chalked it up to the girl not being able to understand her emotions at the moment.

That we can party on the positive side

And pump positive vibes

So come along for the ride

Making you feel the rhythm

Is my occupation

So feel the vibration

Vibration

Come on, feel the vibration

Vibration

It's such a good vibration

It's such a sweet sensation

Finnie D, break it down

Down

You couldn't help but laugh yourself at the nicknames they gave themselves for the song. Not to mention their dance moves... especially Finn's.

Finally.

Fucking, finally.

Brittany was smiling. But not only that, she was clapping along to the performance, along with a few of your other friends.

However, Santana was the one who looked shocked now, as Finn began his turn at the rap.

Shocked, but highly amused.

With your arms no longer comfortingly holding the girl's around their shoulders. Instead, choosing to rest them along the back of their seats, the Cheerio's head's fully lifted from your neck. You allowed yourself to take a deep relieving breath, happy that the girls were no longer distraught, at least for the moment. Enjoying the, non-funk, performance the boys, and Mercedes, were putting on.

Finnie D's on the back up

Drug-free so put the crack up

No need for speed

I'm anti D-R-U-G-G-I-E, my

Body is healthy

My rhymes make me wealthy

A humoured scoff poured from your lips as you watched your friend run his palm down his body, while trying to do a body roll. Then flashed off the thick silver chain that was sat hanging around his neck.

All the while, Puckerman moved to lay upon the ground. Looking as if he was trying to crawl but was slipping in place. While also lightly pounding the floor with his fists.

And the Funky Bunch helps me

To bring you a show

With no intoxication

Come on, feel the vibration

Vibration

Yeah

Can you feel it, baby?

You dry-heaved at what Finn said, never wanting to hear him say the word 'baby' as a pet name ever again.

It would be awful for you if he and your sister ever got together, and you were forced to hear that all the time in passing.

Suddenly, plans of how to avoid him and your sister popped into your mind if that ever did happen.

You assumed you would be spending even more time with Matt, Mike, and Quinn if that be the case.

But even so, you still clapped along with your friends, in tune with the song.

I can, too

It's such a good vibration

It's such a sweet sensation

It's such a good vibration

"All right, good job, guys," Mr Schue said, making his way up towards the three, clapping along with the team, "But, that's not funk. I mean, the group is called 'Marky Mark and The Funky Bunch ', but that is a rap song."

"A kick-butt, old-school rap song," Puck protested the man's critiques.

"Does it really matter, Mr Schue?" Artie asked as the teacher humorously rolled his eyes at Puckerman, "We're so clinically depressed we're doing the wrong songs? We're in a deeper funk than ever."

"No, I don't think it's fully that," you disagreed with the boy, "I just think that they're idiots and thought that it was a funk song with the name of the band, and they roped Mercedes into it."

It was only when the boys moved to talk with some of their other friends a few minutes later did Mercedes softly wave you over.

Leaving the girls by your sides with a small nod to them both, a silent assurance that you wouldn't be away from them for long.

Or at least hoped, depending on what Mercedes wanted to talk to you about.

"Do you know where Quinn is?"

"No." You shook your head. "I haven't seen her all day."

"Well, when you find her, will you let me know where she is? I want to speak to her."

"Yeah, of course."

She never asked you to go looking for the blonde girl.

But does that mean you weren't going to, anyway?

Abso-fuckin'-lutely not.

You just had to make sure Santana and Brittany made it to class, then you would go looking for the ex-cheerleader. Considering you both had a free period then.

It didn't take you long to find her once you entered the library.

Spotting her pouring over her books, sat look etched upon her face as she leaned into her hand.

Quickly shooting Mercedes a quick message:

Y/N: She's in the library.

Y/N: Looks pretty down.

Y/N: Engaging target.

Y/N: Over.

Mercedes: You are such a nerd.

Mercedes: ... over.

Grinning in success at the girl's written response, you did as you said you would and strode your way over to "engage with target".

"I don't think I've ever seen somebody concentrate so hard on biology before," you commented as you pulled out the chair to slide into the seat beside her.

Quinn said nothing in return.

Only sighing softly, eyes never once tearing away from her work.

Knowing she wasn't going to give you any sort of vocal reply, you took it upon yourself to speak up once more. Hoping to get the blonde talking.

"Didn't see you in Glee Club today."

Softly shaking her head, Quinn finally spoke, "I'm so embarrassed."

"Because of your performance?" you asked even though you didn't need to, considering you already knew her answer to be true.

Just as she was about to reply, Mercede's slid up to the table and sat across from the girl.

The blonde, now ignoring you, dropped her hand and straightened up in her seat, face almost looking like a fish out of water.

"Mercedes, I'm so sorry," she stared off in a whisper, shaking her head at the girl before her.

"You may not be a minority, but you certainly get how I feel sometimes."

"For nine months," Quinn whispered smally again, "You've had to deal with this your whole life. People making assumptions, calling you names. I seriously can't understand why you don't feel like yelling at people all the time."

"What's the point in getting angry?" Mercedes asked with a shrug.

"Because it's infuriating," the blonde reasoned, "I hate all the looks at school. Don't even get me started on Puck's mom," she scoffed. Resting her head against her splayed fingers for a moment, out of frustration.

"Yeah, I would have started throwing fists a long time ago." You nodded from where you sat by the girl, leaning back into your seat, finger's weaved together and resting over your abdomen. Then your brows ticked up as a thought popped into your head. "Speaking of which..." You turned to Quinn. "Give me names, and I'll deal with them."

"No." She pointed at you. "I need you here with me. And not suspended from school."

"You're not angry, Quinn." Mercedes shook her head, bringing the point back to the one at hand, "You're hurt. You just need someplace safe where you can dig through all that rage. Get to the pain beneath it. So, it's decided. Saturday, you move out of Puck's house and... you move in with me."

"With, what?" you asked for the girl, considering all she could do was shake her head confused as a minuscule smile tugged at her face.

"I already talked to my mom about it. My brother went off to college, and we have an extra room."

"Mercedes."

Quinn couldn't wipe the bright, grateful smile off of her face, even if she tried.

And you were the same.

Just sat there beaming while you looked back and forth between the girls, so incredibly happy and relieved for the girl by your side.

"It's cool. Us sisters gotta stick together, right?"

Mercedes then raised her fist, as she bit her lip, waiting for Quinn to give it a bump.

Your smile had shrunk into a content, warm one as you watched their interaction.

Quinn chuckled lightly before she gave her what she wanted. Bumping her fist and being slow on the uptake of miming an explosion, both girls laughing softly afterwards.

"Wait, hold up." You jolted in your seat, palms coming to rest upon the table, startling the girls as you did. "Does that mean I get to hang over at Mercedes' more often instead of enduring Puck's mother every time I have to pick you up?"

Laughing, Mercedes nodded her head. "Yes. You were also free from Puck's mom."

Remembering that you were still sitting within the school library, you raised your arms high up into the air, pumping your fists, as you quietly celebrated, "Yes! Yes! Yes!"

"I think Y/N may be happier than I am," Quinn joked, her eyes widening soon after when an excited gasp tore from your throat. Watching as you excitedly pointed towards Mercedes.

"Your mom makes those bomb-ass cookies. Oh, this is amazing," you finished off in a dreamy voice.

Leaning your head back into the hard seat, smiling as the girls giggled at you. Before they trailed off as they saw your face fall, and suddenly a groan poured from you.

"I'm gonna have to lift everything again, aren't I?"

"You work on a construction site." Quinn shrugged happily. "You're used to it."

"You're a professional," Mercedes teased over next. Only leading you further into another groan, gaining a hissed 'shh' from the old librarian, as you did.

---

You had calmed down the course of a few days.

No longer wanting to kick Jesse's ass, if only for your sister's sake.

But now?

That anger was back.

"And now I just keep having nightmares of all of the mothers of the little baby chickens after me for revenge."

But you were still logical.

So, as your sister slowly span around in the wheeled chair she sat in, in the middle of the choir room floor. Looking at the people gathered around her in a large circle. You could only furrow your eyebrows in confusion at her confessed words.

"You do know that's not how eggs work, right?" you asked sceptically, "The grocery store eggs can't hatch chickens. Unless Vocal Adrenaline got fertilized eggs from somewhere, then no chickens were killed on you. Because I don't think any of them are smart enough to know that that's not how eggs work, themselves."

Your words, like usual, went mostly ignored.

Instead, everyone turned to look at Puck as he groaned.

"This is bull. Finn, Mike, Matt, come with me," he then finished as if he were in some sort of intense action movie.

"Right on." Finn, along with the other called for boys, stood from their seats. "It's time for less talking and more punching."

"And I wasn't invited, why?!" you exclaimed, jumping up from your own chair. Quickly moving to follow them to the door Mr Schuester was just coming through, Kurt and Artie rushing to tag along with you, "She is my sister, after all."

"Hey, what's going on?" your teacher asked, concerned.

"We're on our way to go all 'Braveheart' on Vocal Adrenaline," Finn announced, throwing his fist down.

"Wait, guys, violence is never the answer."

"No," you agreed, "That's the question. And in this situation, the answer is "yes"."

"Yeah, and when it is when the question is what's the best way to mess up that Jesse kids face!" Puck seethed.

Which... might have been one of the first times you've ever agreed with the boy. When it didn't involve 'Bert and Ernie's' gayness.

"Mr Schue, Rachel's one of us," Kurt spoke up next, "We're the only ones who get to humiliate her."

"Yeah!" you yelled, before fully realizing what the boy had just said, then turning to face him, "Wait, what? Well... me more so, 'cause sibling rights," you shrugged, walking along with the guys past Mr Schue.

"Now, guys, stop!" You did. You all did. "Get back here and sit down!" Only Kurt did that, with a bowed head, making his way back over to the girls. "Look, I know from experience that making someone suffer doesn't make your pain go away."

"What if that someone is the one who caused the pain and deserves everything that's coming to them?"

"But why do you have to be the one to give it?"

Frustratingly you threw your arm out towards Rachel, "She's my sister! It's my job to take care of her and do this shit. I'm her family."

"Y/N, this is not the way." You scoffed at your teacher's calm words. Shaking your head as you rolled your eyes at the ceiling, with your arms folded across your chest. "You're all amazing, no matter what Vocal Adreanling says or does. We just need to find some way to remind ourselves of that."

"We can't just let Vocal Adrenaline get away with turning Rachel into an omelette."

"Were not."

"No offence, Mr Schue," you replied to the man's intense words, "But your prank ideas are shitty at best, and we're way beyond that point right now."

"It's not a prank," was all he said before spinning and strutting towards your sister, "Rachel, dial Jesse's number on your phone."

The girl reached into her bag, and with only a few clicks on her rhinestone-encrusted phone, she handed it over to Mr Schue.

"You haven't deleted his number yet?" Santana questioned sceptically.

You could hardly believe that she would keep out hope for the boy who crushed her heart in such a way for so long.

Except, that you could fully believe it. It was your sister, after all.

"Jesse St. James? Will Schuester here," he spoke into the phone, "You and Vocal Adrenaline need to meet at our auditorium. Friday, three sharp."

You watched as the man flipped the phone shut, consequently hanging up on the boy on the other line.

Waiting a few seconds, you asked, "What the hell is happening at three 'o'clock on Friday?"

---

You were with Quinn, at your place like you normally were at the end of the day, just sitting around watching TV while she finished up the last of her math homework.

Which, speaking of...

"Will you change the channel?" the blonde asked suddenly, waving up to her head, "I can't hear myself think with all the noise."

"Well, it is 'The Texa Chainsaw Massacre', it's kinda expected," you muttered, picking up the remote, "You can just admit that you're scared."

"I'm not scared."

'Liar'

You hummed, now flicking through the channels, "Well, then you better not call me tonight after waking up from a bad dream if you're "not scared"."

Just as Quinn had looked over her shoulder and away from her books splayed over the couch, mouth open to sass her reply back to you, she was cut off.

Instead, having her full attention pulled to the TV.

"Let's hear from the internationally ranked Cheerio's Coach, Sue Sylvester," the interviewer announced as the camera panned over from the large trophy and celebrating team to the two. Santana jumped onto Brittany's back in the background as the man continued speaking, "Coach, six consecutive National titles. You're the Michael Jordan of cheerleading."

"Thank's, Brett. I am."

"I can change the channel if you want."

"No." She shook her head, eyes still firmly glued onto the TV. "Leave it on."

"Sue, let us how about the decision you made to have Kurt Hummel here do a fourteen and a half minute Celine Dion medley entirely in French."

You couldn't help the laugh that escaped you when Sue stopped Kurt from trying to walk past the camera in any but to be on TV more and pulled the boy into her side via a locked arm around his neck.

"Well, I'll tell you what, Brett, I'm all about finding a freakish, depressed kid and showing him what winning is all about."

"Viva La Différence!" Kurt took his chance to speak into the microphone. Before doing a kick for the camera.

"Did you know he could speak French?" you turned to the girl, who only shook her head in reply.

"Well, Sue, congratulations," Brett chuckled, "But I have to ask, where are you going to put that mammoth, skyscraping trophy?"

"I know just the place."

Your eyes connected with Quinn's, not even needing to vocalize your words to know that you were both thinking the same thing.

'The choir room'

---

Friday at three came sooner than you expected.

The large group of Carmel High's Glee Club gathered in the auditorium seats, all wearing matching school hoodies. Eyes intensely watching your sister as she spoke.

You, along with the rest of the club stood posing behind the screen, standing right in between Santana and Quinn. Arms spread and raised up near your head. Peace signs flung up on both hands. Head bowed slightly, with a red beret sat pushed to the side.

"I can't believe Rachel made me stand like this," you mumbled, starting to feel cramps travel up your arms.

Quinn 'shhed' you lightly, while Santana whispered over, "Shut up, Mr Schue said we look awesome."

"I feel like a fucking scarecrow."

"Thanks for coming. After your brazen escalation of our growing dispute, which we were willing to put to rest, we decided the only way to truly "funkify" you is to show you the one thing we know you can't do. So enjoy."

Your eyes widened in surprise when Kurt came out from the sidelines and began singing.

Roof off

We're gonna tear the roof off

'Oh my, God, Kurt's voice is deep!'

The mother sucker

Tear the roof off the sucker

Tear the roof off,

We're gonna tear the roof off

Tear the roof off the sucker

Finally, you had a reprieve from the pain in your arms, as you were now able to move them freely as you danced with your team behind the screen. Letting Vocal Adrenaline watch your shadows as you all begin singing.

You've got a real type of thing

Goin' down, gettin' down

There's a whole lot

Of rhythm goin' round

With Rachel and Mike leading the charge, everyone began pouring out the sides of the screen to join Kurt front and centre on the stage.

You've got a real type of thing

Goin' down, gettin' down

There's a whole lot of rhythm

Goin' round

We want the funk

Give up the funk

You passed by Quinn as you moved to the backline of your dancing group, looking over your shoulder to gauge the wide-eyed look upon Jesse's face.

We need the funk

We gotta have that funk

We want the funk

Give up the funk

We need the funk

We gotta have that funk

Na-na-na-na-na

Doo doo doo doo doo doo doo, ow

Na-na-na-na-na

Doo doo doo doo doo doo doo, ow

You could call this gay solidarity.

Dancing with Kurt, the rest of your team spread out and doing the same.

Out of the corner of your eye, you could see Quinn and Mercedes getting into it. The smile on your face widened at how close they seemed to be getting.

We're gonna turn this mother out

Give up the funk

We're gonna turn this mother out

The team had come back together and now were dancing with the people around you.

Which, good for you, Quinn was right there in front of you. And was happily dancing with you, similar to how she had been with Mercedes earlier in the song.

Gotta have that funk

Oh, yeah

We're gonna turn this mother out

Give up the funk

We're gonna turn this mother out

Na-na-na-na-na

Hey

Doo doo doo doo doo doo doo, ow

You watched from the pregnant blonded's side as she danced before the rival ream. Heart practically dropped to your ass as she dropped to the floor in a squat.

Just knowing your reaction would get back to her, and she would call you overprotective, yet again.

You've got a real type of thing

Goin' down, gettin' down

You've got a real type of thing

Goin' down, gettin' down

There's a whole lot of rhythm

Goin' round

At Jesse's stern yet scared face, you took great satisfaction. Unable to hide the smug smile.

A lotta rhythm goin' round

You've got a real type of thing

Goin' down, gettin' down

There's a whole lot of rhythm

Goin' round

"Yeah!" your team cheered, some of which hi-fiving just before Mercedes started belting out the next part. Taking that as your queue to split off into separate sides upon the stage.

Yeah

We want the funk

Give up the funk

Starting with Kurt, everyone was tasked with dancing down the open centre of the team. Shooting finger guns, which you could only describe as a camp cowboy.

We need the funk

Gotta have that funk

Funky

We want the funk

Yeah

Give up the funk

We need the funk

It wasn't long before it was blondie's turn. And, as it seemed, she was trying to give you some sort of a heart attack with the spin she did.

Yeah...

Maybe you were a little overprotective of her.

Gotta have that funk

We want the funk

Funky, funky

Give up the funk

We need the funk

Get down

Just after Santana showed off her "moves", it was your turn.

You... well, you made it up on the spot. And luckily, your reflexes were quite fast, so you were able to catch the hat that had flown off of your head and up into the air before it could land on the ground. Quickly pulling it back on.

Gotta have that funk

Hey

We want the funk

We need the funk

Gotta have that funk

Yeah

You smacked Quinn's open palm as you walked by her, only to throw your arm over your sister's shoulder'. Reminiscent of when you had done that very same thing earlier that week. Only now, with much higher spirits.

"Whoo!" your team celebrated the end of the performance, making your way off of the stage.

"See you punks at Regionals," Puck called over to the group of stunned teenagers.

"Now, get the hell out of our auditorium!"

-----

Prev Part | Next Part

#quinn fabray x reader #quinn fabray imagine #quinn fabray #original work #original fanfiction

[0poole]

I LOVE No Straight Roads

Honestly it’s hard to keep me away from a game with great visuals and even greater character design. I knew from the INSTANT I saw these characters that I was going to love it. I just finished it because it’s (unfortunately) pretty short, and even though I cheesed the final boss through it’s very lenient death mechanics (Instant respawn at the cost of a good rank) I actually appreciated that it wasn’t a pure cake walk. I’ve yet to rematch all of the bosses, but since I had genuine trouble with the later ones I’ll hold off on that.

But who cares about gameplay, am I right? I sure as hell don’t. I would’ve bought the game no matter what the hell it was. I wanted the characters (and the music, although I realized that second) and that was it. 

First of all, I love any world that is super fantastical but cheesy in its concept, ala a city powered by music, and battles between artists using music. Ideas like this only spawn from a mind that wants to create a fun atmosphere, if nothing else, and it was sure as hell fun. I genuinely love when someone goes so far into a crazy idea and doesn’t waste your time explaining it with real world logic. Wanna know how a city can be powered by music? Shut up and look at the cute virtual mermaid. Lord knows I did. Every once in a while, it does you good to just let the player/reader/viewer just revel in the idea without having to go out of your way to make things seem realistic. It’s not about “turning your brain off” or whatever, it’s picking your battles.

Also, I can seriously love a world with great background characters to it. Any game with the right situation to insert the random nobodies you find onto the streets into the art in the credits really played into the greatness of the world’s less important characters, and that’s always a good thing. It’s technically world building. But, since I always love to pick favorites, I’d have to say my favorite background character is easily Mia, the NSR infodesk assistant. It’s funny, because you can literally search “nsr characters” into Google and she’s the third image result. I love how jumpy she is when you first interact with her, since NSR probably spread the word about B2J suggesting they’re rock thugs who’d beat up anyone, so for all she knows she could die right then and there with a guitar lodged in her skull. She’s probably just some intern trying to pay for college. She don’t want trouble.

Also, I just realized that 90% of the characters in this game have the same body structure that I always love, that being having arms/legs that sort of fan out in width into relatively large hands/feet. It’s a kind of limb structure I fall into so much because it just really hits me right for some reason. I really can’t explain why.

Anyways, I gotta talk about the big boys individually:

Mayday and Zuke are an amazing duo. I’m always a sucker for a cute and crazy girl, but honestly Zuke hit so many of the right notes too. I will say it’s weird to pair the martian Zuke with the humanly-skinned Mayday, but honestly it doesn’t even matter because he looks so cool on his own. I love his weird blocky blue dreadlocks, and his weirdly shaped shirt which bares his chest in the weirdest way... And, oh my god, Mayday’s weird Spongebob background flower eyes? It’s little tidbits like that that really make me jealous. How could I have ever thought of that? It looks so perfect, and I don’t know why. And her little booty jig she does in her idle animation? Adorable. I played as her as much as was reasonable not only because I’m a filthy button masher with little strategy but also because she’s so damn cute. I can also appreciate how she has a tough-as-nails persona while still keeping a semi-girly attitude, like with her falling for 1010 and Sayu. Characters are so much better when they’re a perfect blend of characteristics, instead of being all one-note, like how Zuke is the quiet one but gets heated against DK West, and all. 

Honestly the voice acting for every character is great, but I love when Mayday’s VA’s accent shows through. It’s a perfect twang to accent (consider this the only acknowledgement of a pun in this post) her snarkiness. 

DJ Subatomic Supernova was going to be an easy favorite since he’s all space-themed. Also, I don’t know why I always end up liking the egotistic characters. Not in the sense that I like their egotistic-ness, but in the sense that I like everything else about them and they just so happen to also be egotistic. The same applied with Empoleon (maybe like my 2nd favorite Pokemon) and Rarity from MLP, probably among others. Either way, I’ll never not love space themes. Not to mention he’s got a funky disco theme, and I’m slowly starting to realize that I am in extreme love with techno-funk styles of music. The instant I heard his music he cemented his place into my playlists. 

As for design, I still have no idea what the fuck he is. Clearly AI is at human levels in this world, but if he’s a robot why does he still have hairy legs? But, if he’s a human, is that weird orb his head? Is it just some sort of puppet which he controls from inside his giant jacket? I know I dissed explaining things realistically but I actually want to know with this guy. Even the wiki doesn’t say. Either way, he’s clearly the logical extreme of “being at the center of your own universe.” Even his jacket depicts a solar system, with his hood being the sun. Didn’t see that until I tried to draw him. I really wish this guy wasn’t so tied to his DJ stand so I could reasonably draw him without it. I don’t want to draw his hairy ass legs. It is a great touch for his design though (although I prefer his beta look with pants and long boots, another design trait I tend to gravitate to) since DJs could reasonably not wear pants, since they’re always behind a table.

Sayu is my favorite. It’s so plainly obvious. It’s weird to say that sometimes, because some characters like Sayu are so clearly engineered to be as adorable as possible, to the point where they’re basically a parody of whatever they’re supposed to be emulating, but then they do that so well that they are still likable for what they’re trying to parody. Also, even though I’ve never looked into any vocaloid superstars myself, the fact that they exist and are loved in real life is absolutely perfect to be used as a character design in a world like this. It’s so weird conceptually, but we all know it’s normal and realistic. But yeah, she’s a giga-cutie whom I’ve already drawn and I’ve listened to her theme on loop on many different occasions. Favorite character, favorite track, favorite weapon of choice (What did I say about Empoleon?), which, and I wouldn’t have noticed this myself, looks like the USB symbol you see above USB ports on computers. How crazy perfect is that?

Even apart from my unbridled love for cute monster robot(?) girls, her boss fight is probably the 2nd greatest of them all, at least conceptually. She’s just a hologram, so you can’t touch her, but you CAN disconnect the artists which control her in order to defeat her. It’s the kind of concept for a boss fight that could only work for this type of character. I’m a sucker for the cute girl that provides her voice, but I love how the animator (video editor? the yellow one) actually attacks you with a mouse and lowers the brightness of the setting once he appears. Also, the mocap guy being the deeply-voiced type but still providing the adorable movements of her body. It’s such a great combo of characters, and their little extra art in the credits makes me like them even more. I just wish we could interact with them individually.

DK West was probably one of the most interesting characters visually, especially since I knew of every other NSR member long before the game came out, but I only just heard of him closer to the release. I wasn’t sure where he was placed, but I definitely assumed his gig was the weird shadow demon we saw in the trailers. When I finally saw him in game, I was shocked to hear him speak an entirely different language most of the time, which was really cool. Also, finding out he was tied to Zuke and wasn’t strictly an NSR artist really made him more interesting. You know, if his fucking shadow clone magic didn’t make him crazy cool enough. Even though I suck at his game and am not especially fond of his raps, the visual of him rapping with this giant monster behind him and dozens of weird shadow wingmen by his side hyping him up was probably one of the coolest in the entire game. The dark way they were hyping him up too gave such a bizarre atmosphere, especially since it parallels his seemingly chill and smiley demeanor. 

I definitely hope they’ll introduce new bosses as DLC in the future, and make them sort of in the same vein as DK West, where they aren’t the biggest artists ever, but they want to pick a fight with B2J. I’d kill for any extra content this game can provide.

Yinu is obviously special since she was the subject of the demo they put out for the game. Even though I knew all her bells and whistles, she and her mom still beat me a few times in the full game. Considering she’s semi-tied to story-ish spoilers I kinda want to go more into her in a separate section. It is worth considering playing the game first since it’s not hard (with the easy going deaths) and it’s short length.

1010 seriously grew on me as I learned more about them and interacted with them. I got their shtick when I first looked at them, but after seeing that animation of them touring the city on Youtube I was kinda falling for them. Then, I learned that they’re apparently repurposed navy war robots? I mean, maybe not them specifically, but it seems to heavily point in that direction, with the warship cars and “attention!”s and all. It took me a bit to get into their music too, but once I actually fought them and put their actions to the music I fell in love with it. I swear, Neon J’s weird dancing can has some of the smoothest moves in all of gaming. I don’t know whether they mocapped out those movements or got one of the greatest animators ever, but it looks so impossibly clean his part of the song gets me like 30x more hype than it would normally. 

Also, their little art piece of them looking at fan mail in the credits is probably one of the most adorable things ever. Even if they’re just Neon J’s puppets, that piece of art really makes it seem like they love every one of their fans. I’m not gonna lie, I might swoon a bit too if they picked me out and gave me some special attention.

Oh yeah, and the fact that Mayday was super sad in her showstopper against them was adorable and hilarious at the same time. The little tweaks they made to the showstopper for each fight were great.

Eve just has to be Lady Gaga, right? Like, an even crazier Lady Gaga. DJSS is Daft Punk (or any artist with a helmet persona, you know what I’m talking about), Sayu is Hatsune Miku, DK West is Kanye West, Yinu is a generic child protege, 1010 is a KPop boyband (just pick one) and Eve is Lady Gaga. That’s just how things are. But, again, this is the kind of boss fight that only this type of character could provide. It’s not just surreal imagery, it’s ARTISTIC surreal imagery. The fight is so mesmerizing in every way, especially by how it starts off so slow and calm and progresses to insanity, as well as the increased emotional investment in the fight making you feel so much more into it than just “That’s the boy band. Let’s fight.” Not only does it get you more invested, but it makes her artistic persona go deeper than just “she looks weird.” She is genuinely conflicted about her relationship with Zuke, and naturally that leads her to literally split him and Mayday apart. That mechanic specifically was the coolest, although I do wish they made it more obvious when you needed to switch over to a different side. I was getting pulverized by her fight too, since there were so many things to pay attention to. Her fight was definitely the best one. 

Tatiana and Spoilers:

Let’s be real with ourselves, the twist was so obvious. I do also think, though, that obvious twists aren’t bad if they’re just good reveals. At some point, a person just has experienced so many stories that “only pretty good” twists are easy to spot. It doesn’t mean that the twists are bad, it just means you yourself experienced.

I feel like her transition from rock to EDM was pretty understandable, even as a non-musician. She was so caught up in what she assumed was popular that it basically consumed her. It’s easy as an artist to want to forgo what you truly want to make in favor of what makes you popular, and clearly since her transition to EDM made her the CEO of the biggest company in the city (world?) that probably made her think she truly needed to change her outlook. Then, when she saw B2J try to bring it back, she sort of coined them as being as misguided as she was and knocked them down a peg. Plus, they were kinda being jerks about it.

It’s kinda like the Trolls sequel, where everyone pegs rock music fanatics as being too stuck up in their own heads to appreciate other types of music, which honestly seems more like the case than the alternative. When I first heard of the story of the game, I was seriously hoping they did put an asterisk on B2J’s ambitions because they were a bit sketchy from the start. 

That’s kinda where I want to talk about Yinu, because she was the true turning point in what they were doing. She’s literally 9 and yet she’s getting dragged into all this BS. When she said “I hate you all” at the end of her fight, and played a somber tune on her broken piano after the fight destroyed it, you kinda got a kick in the face to realize you’re kinda being an asshole to some of them. Sure, they fight back, but they wouldn’t fight in the first place if they didn’t have to. They are just people who play music under a joint name that B2J just so happened to get in hot water with. 

Then, of course, there’s Kliff, who also reeked of surprise villain, and who’s basically the embodiment of the bad side of B2J, where he just wanted to destroy for his own sake and not for the actual greater good. Once B2J realized their mistake, they backed off, but Kliff was so hard pressed to do what he planned on in the first place he wouldn’t stop. I kinda wish he got a bigger fight to his own since he’s clearly a big enough tech genius to divert a whole satellite into one specific building. Maybe the Elliecopter chase bit was his thing, but I do kind of wish he was there to fight against them too.

Even though Tatiana did kind of reform a bit quick, It’s still not too crazy to assume she could see that B2J was just misguided and the fact that they worked to revert their wrongdoings for her sake would make a pretty strong impressions. They clearly can hold their own, so it’s not like she wouldn’t want them to join NSR too. 

Oh yeah, and her boss fight was clock/time themed. If there’s a theme under space that I love, it’s clocks/time. 

And If I am to be respected by the internet, I must provide a negative opinion to balance out my positive one. I will say that the character model physics (like Mayday’s braids, DK West’s vest thing, Neon J’s fluffy neck thing, etc) got kinda funky at times. Especially DK West’s vest, which was completely messed up for every scene he was in... Also, even though the voices are mostly great, some lines felt a bit off. Just a bit. That good enough? Good.

But yeah anyway that’s another favorite game to add to the pile. Eventually I’m gonna have to compile a true list of my all-time favorite games/movies because I do kind of want to have a solid idea of what my all-time favorites are.

#nsr #no straight roads #bunk bed junction #dj subatomic supernova #sayu #yinu #dk west #spoilers #1010 #eve #tatiana #rambling #review #poole #etc #opinions #rant

[halseyquinn]

Some thoughts on inconsistencies in Inkspell/Inkdeath

While reading Inkspell/Inkdeath I kind of got the impression that some parts of the plot didn‘t really follow the plot in Inkheart. That made me think that maybe Inkheart wasn‘t really meant to have a sequel in the first place. I personally think that the first book was written without the second and third one already planned. Here are some points that I find inconsistent:

- the whole plot around The Piper/Firefox: I think those two were only invented later (for Inkspell): Flatnose and Cockerell were obviously the first (and last) of Capricorn‘s henchmen read out of the book by Darius. As Capricorn didn‘t seem to know that Darius would mess things up, it is questionable why he didn‘t order the latter to read out some more „important“ people first? In Inkspell we learn that Firefox was Capricorn‘s second-in-command back in the Inkworld, and The Piper was his personal minstrel. Another possible explanation could be, that he wanted to try Darius‘ reading powers on some „less“ important people first. But I personally think that Cornelia Funke invented the two of them later, namely by the time she wrote Inkheart.

- Dustfinger being married: Learning that he was married in the second book, kind of came out of the blue in my opinion. As far as I remember, there wasn‘t even given a hint in Inkheart. Sure, Dustfinger is portrayed as a rather secretive person. But, given how much he had obviously been yearning for Roxane (according to Inkspell) when he was in „our“ world, there should have been at least some little hint at her and their daughters? At least he could have kept some little thing with him to remember her (like a lock of her hair or something, idk???) - I mean, obviously he went away for a while from time to time, so it would make sense for him to always keep some remembrance with him? But maybe he‘s just not the sentimental type…

- Basta‘s whole character development, tbh: In the first book he constantly provided some sort of comic relief. To me he was always the type of secondary villain that you can‘t really take seriously: his constant fears of almost everything, his super emotional relationship with Capricorn and especially the dungeon-scene at the end of Inkheart. At least in my opinion „real“ villains aren‘t meant to show any kind of emotion (like Capricorn, for example). So, in my mind, he was always the sort of clumsy evil-sidekick, but definitely not meant to become any „serious“ villain. So I was a bit puzzled when, at the beginning of Inkspell, basically all of the good guys seemed to be scared out of their wits by the mere thought of him – wtf??? Later in the books, that behaviour really seems justified: he‘s suddenly a whole lot scarier and does way more serious stuff (I won‘t go into detail there) than in Inkheart – honestly, after reading Inkheart, I couldn‘t have pictured him doing more than threatening and robbing people. So, at least to me, his „transformation“ in Inkspell seemed kinda inconsistent with the description of his character in Inkheart.

- Mo: Kind of the same goes for Mo‘s bookbinder-to-bluejay character arc. For me, again, that seemed out of the blue. I mean, he was described as a gentle, non-violent person in the first book (at least I got that impression). After he‘d read out Capricorn, Basta and Dustfinger he barely managed to use the sword, even to simply defend himself and his little daughter. Sure, one gets a lot of background information about his character development, and it all happens quite slowly and he does seem to have pricks of conscience, but still...He always seemed to have the same opinion on violence as Dustfinger. The latter never really changes his opinion. And honestly, I don‘t think one really can – I mean, self-defence is one thing, but what Mo does in the end (especially Inkdeath) can hardly be described as that. And I personally think that a person with an internalized pacifistic approach towards life, can‘t undergo a transformation like that – no matter the circumstances.

So...these are the most important points that I can think of at the moment. I‘d love to discuss that topic – always feel free to disagree with me!

#Inkheart #Inkspell #Inkdeath #Mo #Basta #Dustfinger #Piper #Firefox

[steve0discusses]

S5 Ep10: Kaiba Embarrasses Himself on International Television Again

We start off this duel by teasing us into believing that this is a part of a theme park:

The Kaiba theme park is a weird mix of actual horrorscapes and animal crossing cutesy stuff...you can really tell what parts were Mokuba and what parts were Seto in this park.

But Leon takes it well, just kinda standing there as he’s done this entire arc--being a general forgettable nice boy who just...doesn’t do anything. Like he gets up, he plays cards, he sits down. Having him on top of a rock with melodramatic Little Mermaid waves crashing at his feet is laughably the opposite of Leon’s whole vibe.

Leon just seems like the type that listens to coffee shop ambient Youtube videos when he wants to amp himself up. This kid appears to attend a private school...somewhere...I think, and just went to a dueling competition in his school outfit because he literally doesn’t have a style of his own hanging in his closet.

Like Yugi wears his school outfit, but he does that ironically, to off-set the amount of makeup and hair spray he has in his hair. Leon wears the school outfit maybe because he admires Yugi so much, but is like “time for my rogue bow I wear in my hair. That’ll scare my competition.” He completely missed the point of the 00′s alt school outfit scene.

I do way too much art to not see the imagery. I feel like this is half my job, and playing “where’s the hidden Freudian meaning?” is half the fun of going to any art museum.

(read more under the cut)

Anyway, Seto got tired of no one paying any attention to him, so he stepped out of his 14-monitor mancave, he very quickly pulled his Dragon outfit out of the (dirty) laundry, flicked a couple sea crabs out of his pockets, spritzed it with Febreeze and called it “good enough.”

Like, is it just me, or has dragon jacket greyed out a tad from last season? Like it’s starting to get a little...worn? Like what funk is coming off of Seto Kaiba right now?

Also notice that he brought his giant stash of cards to the duel. He’s going to put on this show as if he’s not going to pull out the giant stash of cards. But like...he’s going to pull out the giant stash of cards. Like Hell boring ass Leon is going to play his deck of Candyland characters again.

Leon is declared a winner on Technicality and it’s like.

Damn Seto, for reals?

So congrats, Leon, you did literally nothing, again, and yet you mystifyingly  persist on this show. Clearly you aren‘t going to grow a second head out of that ponytail like professor Quirrel in the last act of this arc.

That’s when Yugi’s hazy memory recalls something from the Before Times of “that time period before I was possessed by a needy ghost that eats up 3/4 of my memories and time.”

So Schroeder is Atari. Neat.

Also, this makes Zigfrieds outfits a hell ton more endearing when you realize he’s this Willy Wonka game company owner making toys for children. Kinda makes you wonder why Seto’s such a stick up the ass in comparison when it’s like--dude Kaiba, maybe you could learn a thing or two about whimsy. It could really help out your inconsistent park.

Anyway, Kaiba quickly realized who hacked the park and so, understandably, he asked Zigried to leave, which...backfired?

Y’all card culture is a lot. Everyone in the audience covered their faces in shame because they were so embarrassed by Seto Kaiba and I’m like...not sure why? Because he didn’t do a duel? Against this guy who snuck into his tourney not unlike Rex and Weevil? This asshole?

Recall that the last time Seto played a guy who had a fake name it was Marik freakin Ishtar and he killed a LOT of people (actually, it was Alister, pretending to be Pegasus, but he also killed a lot of people so that still tracks). Card culture can’t seem to learn from their mistakes, although Seto clearly sees the problem with dueling a professional hacker in a digital card game on a hologram that may or may not be able to murder you. At least its not a magic.

And so, tired of being humiliated on television, Seto decides to bust out the dueling gloves (well, not those gloves. You know what I meant) and use the equipment he BROUGHT WITH HIM and clearly never intended not to use in the first place.

(I hope you enjoy this dutch angle that wasn’t quite dutch enough, so it just looks like they’re lounging)

Roland patiently walks over from...somewhere? I don’t know where Roland comes from whenever he pops up, but he waltzed over to hold onto this suitcase as if that’s a formal part of his job.

I say this so often but like...I don’t know what Roland’s job is. He’s like a valet/butler/duel referee/duel cheerleader/CEO/and I will spend the rest of this series trying to understand it. Part of me is like...could Roland be a temp worker at an agency who just gets rehired for a different Kaiba Corp job every couple of weeks?

That weird ass fourthKaiba, I will never understand Roland.

Just one letter away from being a Zigfriend, Kaiba. Just one letter away. I know this because I misspell friend a LOT.

Zigfreind? Zigfriend? Damn it, both of them look the freakin same to me, this sucks! Why can’t I spell friend without autocorrect!?

Just the amount these two fight when Seto clearly barely even remembers who this guy even is.

Leon shows up in the seats, pretending that he’s totally cool about winning on a technicality right after Zigfried went on a rant about how shameful, irredeemable, and mortally embarrassing winning on technicalities are.

He seems to take it pretty well, smiling, sitting next to Rebecca, and then dissolving right into the background because this kid’s whole deal is being way too nice to exist on this show.

Y’all we just had that art meme where people were redrawing that “How to draw manga face” and guys...that’s what our anime used to look like.

I mean look at that uncomfortable chin there, that tapers in for some reason. Those eyes melting off of her face. The lack of any 3d sense. This was an anime ideal for a very, very long time.

Anyway, the “how to draw manga face” is a perfect masterpiece and never needs to change. (But it is fun to make fun of it although I guess the person that drew it was actually a kid, which makes sense from a publishing perspective to have a kid make a book about how to draw stuff for kids.)

We see a little flashback of Schroeder and why he hates Seto Kaiba, and can I just say, I kind of love this little outfit. Kind of a shame that it’s stuffed into a flashback.

Which is when we found out that Zigfried thinks Seto Kaiba did a plagiarism.

Which is hilarious because it was Gozaburo Kaiba who was plagiarizing Seto, so like...who did it first?

OK guys. Lets talk about this.

APPARENTLY, there was some sort of contest to work with Pegasus...kind of like an architecture contest (which is a thing, when a city is doing a big project, they send out a call, and big firms will compete to see who builds it) and I GOTTA know what Pegasus’ theme was.

Like did he say to all the little rich kid geniuses “I would like something that makes my cards ALIVE, can you do that?” Then when Pegasus got a hell ton of holograms and was he like “But ALIVE--it makes it alive, right boy?” And when he was shaking the hands of each stupid kid was he like “So if I hypothetically put my dead wife on a card and slapped it into the machine--could she EXIST. Like...enough? I just need her to legally exist is all, and not like..literally of course...but enough literally to be a sin against God, can you do that?”

I just want to know if Willy Wonka Wonderkid Von Schroeder had any idea he was creating a resurrection chamber for a dark wizard. Like he has no idea that he dodged getting his business bought straight from under him and his soul shoved into a card. And it’s not like Schroeder was going to abduct Yugi’s Grandpa and ensure that Yugi would be there to save him down the road. Like I’m pretty sure Schroeder would have been sacrificed waaay before that whole island contest even went down.

Zigfried got so freakin lucky. I can’t believe he’s mad. But then again...

...the man swims in milk pools so like...maybe his logic center is busted? Maybe he wanted to die in a horrific murder island? I don't know what Zigfried is into, but I do know that because Zigfried doesn’t have millennium rod powers linking him to the millennium eye--so would it have mattered? There’s destiny reasons that Pegasus chose Kaiba.

Course...we never found out where the scales ended up, have we? We think it’s Shadi, but have we seen Shadi bust those out since Season Zero?

Man that would be a good plot twist that will absolutely not happen.

Yo, make horse guy into a dark wizard, show, I dare you!

Anyway, that’s all for now, but if you want to read from the beginning, here’s the link:

https://steve0discusses.tumblr.com/tagged/yugioh/chrono

#ygo #yugioh #yu gi oh #S5 #Ep10 #Seto Kaiba #Yugi muto #Duke Devlin #Tristan Taylor #Tea Gardner #Mokuba Kaiba #zigfried von schroeder #leon

[crashdevlin]

Jump The Shark

Author’s Note: This is part nineteen of The Best Laid Plans series

Summary: When John gets a call from the youngest son he never got to meet, Y/n goes with him to find out what happened to the one-night stand John had back in 1990.

Pairing: Alpha!John x Omega!Reader

Word count: 3597

Story Warnings: angst...A/B/O dynamics, canon divergence, angst, mentions of physical violence, mentions of mindfuckery, mentions of ferality, pining, did I mention angst?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You hadn't said anything. Not from the moment you and John found the truck. You climbed up into the cab and changed into jeans, a black and green plaid flannel and a pair of hiking boots. You dropped your suit skirt and blouse out the window going 80 down the interstate, and then you closed your eyes and listened to the Rolling Stones.

You had to open your eyes when your memories started attacking you.

Dean had been so sure that you were the one he wanted, the one he was looking for...but that was Dean Smith and Y/n Colt. That was a Stanford MBA and a former Miss Teen USA runner-up. The idea that he wanted to mark you was particularly hurtful and you were kinda glad you made him wait because you weren't sure if it would have reset like the first mark Sam gave you and the last thing you wanted was for Dean to be tethered to you when he could barely stand to be around you.

He only wanted you because he was someone else. He was someone else, but his soul was still stuck on you. You both felt that pull because you were connected but he didn't want you. Smith liked Colt, but Winchester would never love Y/l/n.

John just drove. It was obvious he had no destination in mind, he just pointed the truck West and drove. Part of you wished that he would go back to Mississippi but you knew that your semi-normal was gone...and it was better. You were a hunter and so were your alphas. No normal for you.

"It hit her hard, Sammy," you heard John whispering as he drove when you woke up a few hours into Missouri. "She hasn’t been that close with your brother in years and the fact that it was all fake is killing her."

A pang of sadness hit you as your brain called forth what John was talking about. The haze of sleep had taken the memory, but now it was clear why your heart felt like so many broken pieces shoved into a box in your chest.

"Yeah, we know that but he won't say it and she probably wouldn't be able to hear it now anyway." John sighed as Sam spoke through the phone. "Son, I don't know what we can do other than what we always do. If you need help, just call, but she definitely doesn't need to be around your brother for a while. All right. Keep me updated," John said before setting his phone on the dashboard. "I know you’re awake, 'mega. Can't fool me."

"Wasn't trying to fool you. Just letting you finish your conversation," you responded, sitting up and stretching as best as you could in the truck cab. "What'd Sam want?"

"Tell me that the whole deal in Cincinnati was the Angels fucking with us. Specifically fucking with Dean. They wanted to prove to him that he was always supposed to be a Hunter or something."

"And we just got pulled along for the ride? That was nice of them." You rolled your eyes and reached down for your purse, pulling out a travel mouthwash. "So, what, everything's dandy now?" you asked as you took a drink of the mint liquid, swished it around in your mouth and swallowed.

"You know, you're supposed to spit that out, right?"

"Only quitters spit," you said automatically. You ran your hand across your face as you dropped the bottle to the floorboard. Dirty jokes Dean told you as a teen were not what you needed to get out of your funk. “I’ve put worse things in my body.”

“Girl, we...we’ll get through this.”

“Not like we have a lot of options, right?” You licked your lips and shook your head. “I’m fine, John. I slept. I’m better. I’m fine.”

“When are you gonna learn that it’s useless to lie to me?” John asked.

“I’m sure it’ll sink in eventually,” you responded, chuckling. “I promise...I’m going to be fine.”

“I know you will,” John said, reaching over to pat your knee.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A few weeks passed and you were getting better at putting it behind you. The might’ve-beens dragged up by the Angels in Cincinnati were slowly being pushed back into the recesses of your mind and you were feeling better. Sam emailed John to tell him about some jerk in Ohio writing books about the boys’ lives, someone Castiel revealed to be a Prophet of the Lord who was writing The Winchester Gospels. There were books about the boys’ lives, their actions, their innermost thoughts, just hanging out on bookshelves around the world. You wondered if you were in any of the stories, the gospels.

John’s secondary cell phone went off as you pulled the truck into the parking lot of a coffee shop and he frowned as he looked down at the screen before he answered, “Hello?” A beat of time as you parked the truck and turned to him. “He’s not available. Can I help you?” He had a severe look on his face and you shook your head at him, confused by his reaction to the call. “What’d you say your name was? Milligan...and, uh, what are you callin’ John for?”

He made a fist and hammered it into his forehead. “Right, well, uh, I hate to have to tell you this over the phone but John is dead. He died in 2001.” Your eyes went wide and John put a finger up to quiet you before you could even start to question. “If you need help, then I can meet with you, kid. I’m, uh, John Winchester’s son, Dean. Windom, Minnesota. Cousin Oliver Café. We’ll be there tomorrow at 8am. See ya then, kid.”

“What the fuck, John?!” you exclaimed when he ended the call.

“Fuck.” He scratches his fingernails across his forehead and sighs as he sets the phone on the dash. “I recognized the area code, knew it was Missouri, thought it might have something to do with...with this case I had around January 1990. Anybody I interacted with back then, they would’ve known me before I got hit with that hex. So, that’s why I answered the phone like that and I’m glad I did because...because the kid on the other end of the phone is…” He trailed off and you gave him a pointed look.

“The kid on the other end of the phone is what?”

“My youngest son, Adam.”

Your eyes went wide, confusion and anger filling your body. “Your what?”

“I told you...I told you that I had one dalliance before you after Mary died, remember? When I was on that ghoul hunt and I went into rut and I-I was almost feral and I had one night where I couldn’t fuckin’ control myself and-”

“You knocked her up with pups?” you whispered. For some reason, it hurt a lot more than it should, especially considering you were only seven years old at the time.

“Only one. Adam.” He shook his head at himself. “She never told me. I didn’t know anything about it until 2001...and by then…by the time Adam called the first time, I was a young man again. I couldn’t show up looking like a twenty-five year old and start a relationship with the boy. So I just never called him back, kinda put him on the back burner. I figured I’d go see him when we found the witch and fixed me but I never found the witch and-”

“So, why’s he calling again now?” you asked, trying to be understanding. It wasn’t John’s fault. He should have told you. He should have told his other sons, but he couldn’t do anything about it now.

“His mom, Kate, is missing.”

“And he called you because?” you asked.

“Because the cops aren’t worried and his mom told him to try to get a hold of me if anything weird ever happened. She knew about the hunting.”

“So, your plan is to...pretend to be your oldest son and go meet your youngest son for the first time and try to find his missing mother...who most probably is just normal-missing, not supernatural-missing?” you asked, cautious of your tone.

“I can drop you somewhere if you don’t wanna participate in this, girl,” he said, biting his bottom lip.

“No,” you responded vehemently. “You don’t get to leave me behind, Winchester. Not ever again, remember?”

“Okay, then I’m gonna need you to back me on this and you’re going to have to call me ‘Dean’.”

You nodded. “I can do that.” You weren’t sure you wanted to, but you’d do it for him.

“Thank you, darlin’.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

John was nervous. You could smell it in his scent. You leaned into his shoulder as you sat in the booth, trying to calm him with your own scent. You kept your head on his shoulder as he switched a glass of water out with a glass of holy water and set a trio of silverware on the opposite side of the table. “Just in case.”

“You really think-”

“I looked into him, ya know? Kid did real good without me in his life,” John said suddenly. “He’s real and he’s smart and he never had anything to do with this life. I’m scared it bled onto him anyway.”

You sighed and leaned up to press a kiss to his temple as the door opened and a tall, thin young man walked into the diner. He looked like a mix of Sam and Dean. “That’s him,” you whispered, recognizing him from the Facebook profile.

John, or rather ‘Dean’, stood and waved at the boy.

“Dean?” Adam asked, walking over. John nodded. The boy laughed. “Wow, you look just like the picture my mom had of-of John. You’re almost the spitting image of him.” He let out a scoff as he sat down, his eyes moving to you. “Who’s this?”

“My omega,” John said, a bit defensively.

“Y/n,” you said, offering your hand to him.

Adam took it with a smile. “Wow.”

You felt a cringe move through your body and you looked down. “What?”

“I just…” Adam cleared his throat. “There’s not a lot of omegas in Windom and none are as pretty as you.”

Another Winchester flirting with you was sending all sorts of bad signals through your body. You softly tugged your hand back and sat back down as Adam settled into the opposite side of the booth and picked up the water. You held your breath when he took a drink but the water went down easy so you relaxed a bit.

But not much.

He smelled wrong. John was lavender and orange and ylang ylang, Dean was lavender and honeysuckle and anise, Sam was vanilla and coffee and undercurrents of honeysuckle when he was in rut. Adam smelled like dirt.

Not grass and forest and mossy logs, dirt. Just dirt. He didn’t even have a secondary scent to him, no undercurrent or complementary smell. Just dirt.

There should have been some part of him that smelled like a Winchester, even if he wasn’t the same makeup of a Winchester as the ones you knew. He shouldn’t smell like that.

Adam didn’t seem to notice your musing or your deep breaths to try and find something else in his scent. He went off on a tangent as he ate his breakfast about how John and Kate met in the emergency room at the hospital room where she works and he went into rut after he got hurt and Adam tried to get a hold of John when he was a kid and John just never picked up the phone and he’s glad that ‘Dean’ answered the phone this time.

“At least I know why he didn’t answer when I was calling before. So, uh, what happened to John?”

“Heart attack,” John responded. “It was sudden.”

“Right, guess that makes sense. Heart disease is the number one killer of men his age in the US,” Adam said.

Your eyes focused on the silverware in the man’s fists. Not a shifter either then. But this was something. This was not a Winchester.

“Well, after we get done eating, why don’t you take us to the house and we’ll see if we can’t find something to tell us where your mom got to,” John offered.

“Thanks, Dean,” Adam said with a smile.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"He didn't react to silver or holy water," John argued as he followed Adam's car down the road.

"So? There's plenty of things that can alter people's perception of them that don't react to silver or holy water! Rakshasas, sirens, djinns, ghouls, do I need to go on?" you argued back. "He smells like dirt, John. That is not-"

"Maybe that's just-"

"What'd his mother smell like?" you interrupted.

"Passion fruit...and something else I can't remember."

"Not dirt. He shouldn't smell like that. He's not your son."

John sighed and scratched at his chin. "You might be right. He should smell more like one of us. He doesn't even smell like an alpha, honestly, but...if he's not Adam, then where the hell is Adam? And where's Kate? And why the fuck would whatever he is try to get me out here?"

"I don't know."

"Me either. For now, let's focus on finding Kate and we'll go from there." You held in a groan and focused out the windshield. "I know, 'mega. I'm just...I got this feeling...I lost my opportunity to be a part of this boy's life because of that witch."

"And that’s terrible, John...but you wouldn't have me if it wasn't for that witch so…"

“I’m not sayin’ I regret it, sweetheart, I just...wish I could have...met him once before I went after that bitch.”

“I’m sorry,” you whispered, biting your thumbnail. “Sometimes I wish things were different, too.”

“You wish I never came over when you were going into that first heat,” he guessed.

You swallowed, but you didn’t answer. The truth was, you had thought through a lot of different wishes and butterfly-effect ripples of how it would change everything. If John didn’t show up, you wouldn’t be a hunter. If Dean hadn’t pushed you to let Sam take you when those apple-pie assholes put you in heat, you would have just been Dean’s. If you never sold your soul for Dean, you might have been able to move on, find another alpha...a non-Winchester.

“I don't think I'd be myself if you hadn't shown up,” you answered eventually. “I'd have stayed stuck at Bobby's, never ended up with an alpha let alone two, and I would be dying from never getting a knot in a few years' time...it’s better you did.”

"I'm...glad I did, Y/n. I like the woman you are, the strong and beautiful omega you are.”

You smiled and your cheeks heated up at the praise. “Let’s just get this done, huh?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You weren’t exactly happy that you were the one who had to crawl through the vents but Adam said, and John fucking agreed, that you were smallest and therefor the best choice. When you found the blood and pieces of skull and blond hair, you were happy to be small enough to pull your phone out of your pocket and text the news to John so he could break the news before you crawled back out.

“Call the cops. We gotta get out of here, though,” John said as he offered you a hand to help you up out of the vent.

“Wait, but-” Adam started to argue.

“We don’t mix with cops,” you responded, before stomping away from them, roughly brushing dust off of your jeans and shirt. “Come on, J-Dean. Let’s get out of here.”

“You don’t mix with-” Adam started to argue, but you pushed past him and stomped out to John’s truck.

“There was no surprise in his scent. There was no anger or sadness. I’ve lost both parents, John, there should have been-”

“Maybe he’s numb or-”

“Maybe he’s made of dirt or something!” you snapped. “That is not-”

“He hasn’t done anything wrong yet, ‘mega.”

You shook your head. “Yeah. Yet. You know what, John? I’m gonna go ahead and look into things that could be pretending to be your illegitimate pup.”

You barely looked at him as you got out of the truck and headed inside to start researching. When Adam showed up to find out what was going on with his missing mother and you and ‘Dean’ leaving before the cops showed up and “what the hell?!” John decided to explain about hunting as simply as he could. He didn’t explain who he really was, though. And then John decided to take Adam to explore other options of finding Kate.

It was a couple hours later that you came across a mention in an online lore forum that said ghouls, while normally scavengers who feast on dead flesh, could actually eat living specimens and have been shown to greatly enjoy fresh human meat and blood...and just like feasting on the dead, the ghoul can take the visage of their victim and their memories.

“Didn’t John say that’s what he was after when he was here before?” you whispered to yourself as you picked up your cell phone and dialed John’s number. It rang through until it went to voicemail. You called again. It went to voicemail again.

Panic fell over you. Your alpha was in trouble. Your alpha was in trouble and you had no idea where he was.

“Fuck!” You were almost shaking as you stood up and looked around aimlessly. What could you do? Another string of expletives fell from your mouth before you forced yourself to focus. You took a deep breath and closed your eyes. Your soul was connected to him. You needed to find him.

It only took a flash. A flash of the dining room at Kate’s house, John tied to the table had you grabbing the keys to John’s truck and rushing for your alpha. You pushed that truck as fast as it would go to get it to the house on the outskirts of Windom. The truck tires screeched as you slid to a stop in the front yard. You grabbed your shotgun from the rack in the truck bed and ran into the house.

John was tied to the table, ‘Adam’ and ‘Kate’ standing over him as he bled from his wrists. “Y/n,” he groaned. “They’re ghouls!”

“I know!” you snapped, aiming at Adam’s head and shooting. Parts of his head exploded onto the wall behind him and Kate shrieked before running at you. You moved to pump the shotgun for a second shot, but Kate grabbed you and tossed you into the wall like you were nothing.

“Y/n!”

“I’m fine, John!” you shouted, rolling onto your hands and knees.

“John?” Kate spat out, her tone dripping with poison.

“Forgot to mention before you started draining me,” John groaned. “I’m the one who killed your daddy, sweetheart.”

“Witches are better than plastic surgery, bitch,” you said, sweeping the woman’s leg with your foot. She fell to the floor and you jumped up, grabbing the shotgun and shooting her in the head, too. You licked your lips and panted as you limped over to the table and pulled out a knife, getting him loose from his binds. “You okay?” you asked, grabbing a rag and ripping it in half, wrapping each half around his wounds.

“Yeah. You...you got here in time.” He sat up, his legs hanging off the table as you secured the wraps around his wrists. “How’d you know?”

“I figured out ghouls could eat fresh and then I couldn’t get you on the phone and...I…” You licked your lips. “I knew where to find you.”

“How?” he pressed.

“How’d you know what motel room I was cutting Sam’s mark off of me?” you asked in answer.

“You felt it?” he asked and you nodded. He reached out, barely wincing at the pull on his wrist, and pulled you in for a soft, sad kiss. “They were siblings, kids of the ghoul I took down last time I was in Windom. They called to get revenge for me killing their dad.” He looked away. “Killed Kate and Adam to get revenge first. I was hoping I wasn’t right about my life bleeding on his.”

“It’s not your fault, John,” you whispered.

He shook his head. “I know. Shoulda stuck around to see if the thing left behind little monsters for me to kill, but...I went into rut...and then I had to get back to the boys.”

“John...it’s really not on you.”

“He’s dead because of me.”

“He was alive because of you,” you insisted. “He had nineteen years before these things...he had nineteen years because of you. Please, don’t let this get to you.” You chuckled, ruefully. “I’m the one that’s supposed to be barely floating in an ocean of shit. You’re supposed to be my life raft.”

He smiled and nodded. “I am. I am your life raft, darlin’. Just...a little blood-deprived right now. I’ll perk up after a glass of O.J. and some protein. Come on. Let’s get outta here.”

You nodded and wrapped his arm around your shoulders, helping him off of the table and walking him out to the truck.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Kitchen Sink - @emoryhemsworth​ @flamencodiva​ @wasabiwitteks​ @rainbowkisses31​ @rissbennett @mariekoukie6661​ @officiallyunofficialperson​ @dolphincliffs​ @mrs-meghan-winchester​ @gayspacenerd​ @foxyjwls007​ @ilovefanfic86​ @marvelfansworld​ @f-yeahfandoms​ @wonderlandfandomkingdom​ @hhiggs​ @sev3nruby​  @hobby27​ @paintballkid711​ @divadinag​ @thewhiterabbit42​ @fantasymyth-1 @queenoftheunderdark​ @cosicas-cuquis @superfanficnatural​ @letsby​ @supernatural-bellawinchester​ @onethirstyunicorn​ @swinchester27 @chalicia​ @sunnyroadtrips​ @screechingartisancashbailiff​ @death-unbecomes-you​ @dayasvalkyrie​ @paryl​ @wereallbrokenangels​ @the-american-witch​ @that-one-gay-girl​ @tatted-trina6​ @sunshineandwings86 @lunarmoon8​ @wheezyeds​ @vicmc624​ Hunter Tags - @atc74​ @sandlee44​ @spnbaby-67​ @kalesrebellion​ @tumbler-tidbits​ @hoboal87​ @stoneyggirl​ @kbl1313​ @cookiechipdough​ @mrswhozeewhatsis​ @winchesterxfamilybusiness​ @holylulusworld​ @pretty-fortune​ @screechingartisancashbailiff​ @we-are-all-a-bunch-of-idjits​ @imperiusimpala​ @supernaturalenchanted​ @blueaura​ @quxxnxfhxll​ 

The Best Laid Plans Tags- @pink1031​ @sharlynn​ @viinchester​ @kalesrebellion​ @fabinaforever11​ @roonyxx​ @juggysgirlfriend​ @bobbie3939​ @vicmc624​ 

#cassie writes stuff #spn fanfic #reader-insert #a/b/o dynamics #alpha!john #omega!reader #john x reader

[appledotcodotuk]

why the hive fckin suck at its job: a rant

spoilers for tgwdlm ahead!

first of all, it's important to consider what exactly the hive's job is. my answer is... who the fuck knows. literally. what is the hive's aim. what do you want Paul? more like, what do you want hive? let's find out!

it kinda evolves, as the play progresses. the intial aim of the hive, and one that does actually remain consistent is the constant burning need to grow and devour and gain more and more (insert capitalism metaphor here).

however, this is distorted by the people it possess who influence that aim, as we'll see later.

also the fact it crashes into a theatre displaying Mamma Mia gives the hive the motive it need to fit the world around it to the structure of the musical. having no originality of its own, the hive instead just picks up what is given to it. kinda like an evil baby.

it wants uniformity, that is indeed its ultimate goal and desire, no duh. it thinks it can achieve that through musical theatre, shame that the hive is dead wrong. cause the hive fucking sucks at its own job / aim / ultimate purpose / one concrete goal that motivates all its actions.

can't maintain control over its subjects

okay, so, the hive wants uniformity. it wants everyone to be dancing to the beat of its own tune. right? yeah. shame it literally can't keep its own possessed subjects in line at all. at the risk of sounding like the 10th doctor waxing lyrical abt humanity for the 50th time, humans are really difficult to control cause we're not really motivated by an altruistic allegiance to one primary good. we've got icky emotions that often move us to do stupid unpredictable stuff way more. it makes me wonder if the reason the hive wanted to use musical theatre to try and persuade ppl was cause it seems to think that is how theyll get emotive humans; through emotive songs. anyways. let's look at some examples shall weeeee?

Mr Davidson:

so, Mr Davidson. funnily enough, he's the guy whose in part acting as the hive trying to figure out what it wants through his interactions w/ Paul. every person it possess gives it just a bit more humanity and curiosity abt the world it is currently taking over. at least I think so. hence why as the musical develops u get character's like possessed!Alice wondering 'why does it hurt to love?' - the change in music and mood to something much more introspective really suggests to me that the hive is beginning to question the thoughts and emotions of its human hosts.

Mr Davidson is a family man through and through, he loves his wife Carol. she's his muse, his source of light. his feelings for her are not concrete or easy to explain and solve - hence why his sudden ahem demand of her is so hilarious and also jarring. it completely clashes with the 'I want song' which is simple, and often pushes forward a wider cause. not so with Mr Davidson, he just really loves his wife man. enough to break a frickin alien possession.

tbh I think its hilarious that (at least to me) the hive has to force him to forget and continue with the song, like, he straight up is just talking to his wife in that phone call, talking, not singing. so, no possession until he reverts back into song. ergo, the hive cannot maintain the uniformity it wants. even from the get go when theoretically its control should be stronger cause it has less ppl to co-ordinate. bad. at. its. job.

Paul:

this one hurts folks. yes, I know it's generally agreed, though somewhat debated that the state of Paul by the end of the tgwdlm is not purely possessed. I agree. once again, the hive is unable to truly enforce uniformity.

at this point, the motives of Paul and the hive are kinda just mixed, neither fully human nor fully alien. hence the constant shifts between pleeing for her to get away, to hide, to stay safe: 'what if the only choice is you have to sing to survive' and just full on old style hive nastiness 'let me puke in your mouth and just open your food bin girl' (so romantic 🥰 /j).

the hive has gone away from its original aim, and become something... different. no longer stuck to just one type of genre or style of song, it's really clever to show the developing complexity of the hive by showing how it is now juggling lots of different motifs with references to all the old songs from before recontextualised in a new way - its learning. evil baby... no longer uniform.

general miscommunication:

there are several instances of the hive not fully having uniform control over its subjects. for instance, right after not your seed with the three teens having to like... calibrate. they aren't just completely connected then?? also, this is a very small thing, but uhhhh at the end of inevitable when Paul is about to say the apotheosis is upon... the chorus interrupts him with USSSSSSS. interruptions??? not very in sync of u hive.

I think this inability to exert uniformity is also shown in the contrast between genre of musical theatre. my alien abomination cannot decide whether it wants to be the more modern edgy rock musical (join us (and die), not your seed ) or super happy go lucky old style musical theatre (lah dee dah dah day, and inevitable). it tries to do both, even while trying to encourage union, and sticking to one thing. hypocrite!!!!!

2. aims are guided by the people it possess

so, I mentioned this a bit already, but the hive isn't only mutating the humans, the humans are mutating the hive right back. this is more an interesting observation than any actual analysis but let's goooo.

greenpeace girl:

I think it's very likely that greenpeace girl is one of the first to be possessed. This is probably easily debunkable but whatever this analysis is flying by the seat or its pants anywayyyyy. why? cause where else would it pick up that whole 'this planet needs fixing' thing? it's interesting too, cause it morphs from expressing the desire to join hands and sing together, unity and peace with no actual action behind it. this then goes right to the other end, with the hive going 'fine I'll do it myself' and trying to save things by enforcing a dictatorship on the world. it develops and changes, and strays from its original means of accomplishing its aims! speaking oooooof...

3. inconsistent in means of accomplishing aims

okay, ur an evil hive mind. u think musicals are the way to win over these silly humans cause they're all weak and emotive and seem to respond to them. but, wait! schwoopsie! you haven't realised that for emotional depth and growth to mean anything, you need there to be established development and well... growth. otherwise the sentiments are as vague as the ones expressed in What Do You Want, Paul?

this show has genuine emotional moments, just not really during the musical numbers WITH EXCEPTIONS. any strife is smoothed over quickly, and so the development and change that would have to go into such growth is just gone. (see, You Tied Up My Heart) all so it can achieve its own desire to grow and grow and grow, maybe a metaphor for art being killed under late stage capitalism??

what actually matters is the impact the songs have afterwards, in causing a death - because we have a bond and care abt these characters. those short scenes between Paul and Emma are actually way more resonant than any song. except... inevitable, and also not your seed a bit. at this point the hive has learnt a thing or two, and can actually twist human emotion a little. but for it to do that, it has to reject the uniformity it prizes, and be adaptable. point towards being more human than it first thought? methinks so. and yet it's just not enough...

it's also why let it out, to me, feels really ingenuine. Paul has expressed himself in much better ways already. what they're doing is clearly paining him, and hurting the guy. he's terrified bless.

you can't force someone into being emotional vulnerable, man.

it's why all the deaths for the characters who are forced to express themselves are really violent, involving them being ripped open - literally forcing them to expose themselves from the 'inside out' as Alice reflects in Not Your Seed. you can't force genuine emotional connection, it has to be fostered, shown in the much more affecting relationship of Paul and Emma. the only reason the hive actually has power over our characters is because of these genuine emotional connections, which it tries and often fails to take advantage of, resulting in just resorting to brute violence. messy hive, very messy.

at the core, the musical's a kinda attack on that toxic positivity mindst: trying to force people to reach the sort of easy solutions by sharing feelings in a way that feels pretty invasive and deciding you are instantly fixed. the problems these characters face are jarringly not really what you'd expect a character in a musical to face, cheating, a lot of it, mid-life crisis. problems that are bland, or wayyyy too real. this is purposefully done, to reveal just how silly the hive's aim to use musical theatre to solve everyone's problem is. life is more complex than that smh.

4. a human can write a much more expressive, and genuine song than they ever could lol

u know which song I'm talking abt. what more is there to say. so much for making persuasive songs to tempt people over.

5. make me sad cause they took some perfectly nice ppl and funked them up 😭

this was a stupid point lol. basically I'm just bitter that this hive took a bunch of perfectly okay ppl and gave them hive brain. screw u hive. I swear I'm gonna watch Black Friday soon, cause I'm sure it's gonna completely destroy every thought I've had so far, but whateve,,, just take this as a look at tgwdlm like it's a stand-alone piece.

these guys are supposed to all be 'individuals' on one level, but also 'appendages of a much larger organism'. there's a little too much individualism and fracturing to be cohesive enough to do that I feel. the hive to me is not an infallible, unstoppable force, in fact, every human it takes over only brings it closer to understanding us. so that's maybe a slight positive note??? idk ?! I just have lots of thoughts and feelings abt this musical even if this doesn't make sense I'm proud i wrote it down hehe.

#tgwdlm #the guy who didn't like musicals #the hive tgwdlm #cw: swearing #sorry i swear a lot when im passionate lmfaoooo #more a reason to attack the shet out of the hive for ruining a perfectly ok town #paul matthews #speculation #my hcs #this is like #part joke part serious analysis #long post #im so sorry #emetophobia warning (its referenced a bit) #this might make literally no sense im so sorry #i have too amny thouvjfs #i have too many thoughts #head full all thoughts #my gifs #gifset

[oneletterelliot]

Sticker (NCT  127) - liveblog reaction

No disclaimer because this is my first time listening to anything off the album. I  didn’t even watch any of the teasers. I’ll take a look at the MV for “Sticker” later.

Sticker - Interesting instrumental opening. A little grating on the ears. Oh no, autotone? Stop that. Get some help. I’m... not loving this. I like the I backing vocal harmonies at 0:56, but this song sounds so disjointed? The voice at 1:14 is appealing – Taeil, I think. (Edit: oh good, I was right for once.) I don’t mind Mark’s rap, but I think I just really don’t care for this instrumental which really kills my ability to enjoy this song. Plus the vocal editing efforts are not to my taste. I mean, it’s possible that it will grow on me like “Punch” did, but... This is hard to listen to. Vocals at 2:04 (Doyoung, I think) are kind of nice. (Edit: yes, it’s Doyoung.) The bridge is really the only tolerable part to me. I like the repeated melody of the synth flute, but I don’t like the synth flute itself. Haechan and Doyoung (at least I think it’s them) demonstrating that growly sort of Broadway / jazz vocals in a few parts is pretty cool, I’ll admit. (Edit: yes, it is them.) Oof. (Side note: when I went to look at the lyrics, I was stunned to learn that 1:59 is Jungwoo??? Wow.)

Lemonade - Intro like a motorcycle starting. I like this instrumental better already. Haechan’s voice is smooth here. Yeah, I’m digging this bassline with the percussion. Did they just say, “Woof?” This is groovy. I like Taeyong’s rap and then oh my god that vocal harmony overlaying him at 0:59? (Edit: apparently, the vocal harmony is overlaying Johnny not Taeyong.) Wow, I like it a lot. “Cherry Bomb” shout out. “Regular” shout out. Already I wish this were the title track lol. This song makes me want to dance. Normally I prefer Mark’s rapping over Taeyong’s, but I think this song suits Taeyong better actually. Fun combination of vocals for this bridge. “Sip it, sip it down.” Oh Jaehyun? God, these backing vocal harmonies are so good.

Breakfast - Continuing the food theme, I see. This is a club beat. “I want you baby, don’t stop.” Baby, don’t stop. The “day and night” harmony at 0:47 really caught my attention wow. I was about to say this song feels a little boring to me, which I still think, but that harmony was nice. Is 1:07 Yuta? (Edit: yes.) I like his voice. This percussion sounds like the built-in backing track on my synthesizer keyboard lol. This feels like the type of song that will grow on me the more I listen to it. I wish NCT 127 got more variety in the bridges. Like, I feel like bridges always follow the same formula, which is fine, but like... there’s so much more they could be doing than just the slowing down and the instrumental gets a little less and the vocals all sing loud and high and long. Similar sort of ending to “Lemonade.”

Focus - Is this album’s slower/softer song? Is 0:13 Yuta? (Edit: no, it’s Taeil.) There’s an interesting sort of underlying tone to his voice. The section starting at 0:38 is appealing. Is this the chorus? Aw, I thought Johnny was about to start rapping at 1:03. I think it’s a shame that this song is back-to-back with “Breakfast,” because they’re both a little flat / boring. I bet this was a fun song to arrange vocally. Like, I can tell there’s a lot going on there, but the end result isn’t that interesting to the ear, in my opinion. Jaehyun sounds good at 2:25. Doyoung sounds good in the following section too. Is this Yuta again at 2:48 after Haechan’s little interjection? (Edit: yes, this time it is Yuta.) It’s gonna be real embarrassing when I look up all these parts I’ve guessed are Yuta and it’s someone else, knowing my recent track record. I feel like this song should’ve been named “Chill.”

The Rainy Night - Piano opening makes a lot of sense for this title. I am immediately reminded of “Dancing in the Rain,” and it’s not just because of the title, I promise! Is this cello I hear? Wait, is this a v waltz? It certainly makes me want to v waltz. I don’t have a lot of thoughts on this song, but I’m enjoying it. I think it’s a nice change of pace, and the instrumental is really lovely. Haechan would kill a solo ballad album, I feel. Pretty harmonies. I love the flow of this. Very pretty piano.

Far - Aw man, I really liked the instrumental opening, but I don’t love this opening rap. Actually, the vibe of this is kind of in the same vein as “Sticker” I think (similar sort of disjointedness and grittiness), but done better. Not interesting enough to be a title track though. Is the “roll up, roll up, do what, do what” at 1:42 Jungwoo? Or maybe him and Haechan passing lines? (Edit: nope, just Jungwoo.) I like this song well enough, not going to be a favorite though. The “na na na na” is kinda catchy.

Bring the Noize - Living up to its name right off the bat. Honestly, I’m still waiting for a song that makes me go “oh wow, Mark sounds great,” because I normally have that moment a few times when listening to NCT 127′s music, but it hasn’t really happened yet here. Now that I’ve reached the chorus of this song, I’m submitting it for being the “MAD DOG” of this album (I find the instrumental unbearably scratchy originally but then listen to it a few more times and fall in love and want to choreograph a dance to it). Disjointedness is really the theme for this album, huh? “Come on, come on, come on” at 2:41, Taeil? Is  this Johnny rapping after that? (Edit: yes, and yes.) I... don’t like it. I think I like Johnny singing more than I like Johnny rapping. Something in this background instrumental sounds like a built-in Garageband sound effect. This rap is very Taeyong. 

Magic Carpet Ride - Soft song again? International rumba. I worry this is going to unbear ably cheesy. Yep. Okay, it’s not unbearably cheesy, but it is cheesy, but as far as cheesy songs go, I’m kind of digging it. Jaehyun sounds nice.

Road Trip - This title makes me think “coming-of-age,” which makes me think NCT Dream. Starting the song with Haechan doesn’t help lol. Oh, who is singing after him? I can’t tell. This instrumental does feel really NCT Dream to me. Other than the fact that I think this should’ve been an NCT Dream song, I have no strong feelings about this song. It’s fine, kind of smooth, not terribly vocally interesting / diverse. Honestly, this song would’ve been great on Hot Sauce.

Dreamer - Deeply into this instrumental. I think my mom would like. It has that disco / funk vibe. I was kinda expecting a ballad based off this title. Am pleasantly surprised. “Time stops.” I like this. “Show me a smile.” The backing vocals are delightful in this. I feel like this album has a TON of lyrical shout outs to previous NCT songs, which is really interesting. Like the kind of thing you’d find on a farewell album lol. This is a very fun song, and I like it a lot.

Promise You - Okay, final song. Who has this opening line? Taeil? Yuta? (Edit: Taeil. Interesting how I’ve really sort gotten their voices all similar this album.) This feels very cinematic. Like the final scene of the movie when the gang’s all gathered back together after the Big Confrontation. I like the driving beat. The section at 1:51 with Jaehyun leading and Doyoung backing is nice. It’s a nice song.

Final thoughts: I was expecting more Jungwoo, based off the teaser images I’d seen. I also expected Mark to wow more than he did. Jaehyun’s voice really stood out to me. This album was an interesting mix of smooth harmony songs and songs that sounded deeply disjointed. I think “Lemonade” is my favorite song at first listen through. 

#nct #nct 127 #e liveblogs nct #e has thoughts

[spectrumed]

3. sadness

Don’t be like that. Be like this, or be that other thing. Be unique, but don’t be too unique. Fit in, but try to be a rebel. Be a renegade, but don’t rock the boat. Don’t know what you are supposed to be? What? Do you have imposter syndrome or something? Just be yourself, but, y’know, sand down the edges a little bit. Be friendlier. Be the kind of person everyone likes. Be the life of the party! Don’t be some shut-in, some crazy cat-lady with absolutely zero social life. Don’t be sad. Don’t burden others with your sadness. Work to maximise the total happiness of your community. A smile goes a long way. Can’t smile? You really can’t help but being a sourpuss all the time? Well, I guess maybe that if you can’t help but stay in a perpetual bad mood bringing everyone else down… then maybe you should just stay isolated? Better stay alone, away from others. You’re toxic. You’re just so damned sad. You really must be quarantined.

I am sad, a lot of the time. Are you? But, no, you can’t just admit that you are sad. Don’t be a buzzkill, try to inject a little humour into the things you say. You can admit you’re depressed, if you do so with a joke. Don’t let others know you’re being sincere. Ironic jokes work the best, don’t they? They let you confess your secret gloom to everyone around, but they’ll never know just how serious you’re being. With a wink of the eye, any candid expression of your inner turmoil can become a hilarious post-modern gag. Are they or are they not telling the truth? Oh, I’ll never tell! And it will all work out excellent, up until the day you commit suicide. But every comedian’s time in the limelight has to end at some point, right?

This blog is supposed to be about autism spectrum disorder, why am I suddenly discussing depression? Well, I suppose that it is time we bring to the table this little thing called comorbidity. Psychology is messy. Some would argue that it is barely even a real scientific field (I tend to think that it is the best thing we have, but I acknowledge that in places, psychology is fundamentally flawed.) You may have thought that you’d get just one diagnosis. One simple label that you can work through and overcome. You’re bipolar, now go deal with it! But instead, you find yourself with a whole fistful of diagnoses. What to hear my proud list of diagnoses? Oh, please, don’t think because I am listing them this one certain way, I put them in order of relevancy to me. I love all of my diagnoses equally.

My diagnoses are:

Generalised Anxiety Disorder (GAD)

Social Anxiety Disorder (SAD)

Agoraphobia

Possible Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD)

Asperger syndrome (AS)

No, I was never officially diagnosed with depression, but largely because, at the time I received these diagnoses, my depression was so blatant that it felt as if I was walking around with a cloud of miasma surrounding at all times. Imagine me as Pig-Pen from Peanuts, but instead of being covered in dirt, I was covered in the funk of melancholy. And whatever treatment I would eventually go on to receive (and still am receiving to this day,) would go about treating my anxiety first, and hopefully, the depression would give in alongside the anxiety. It has, for the most part, though, I still feel the presence of that black dog from time to time. I also got only a half-hearted potential diagnosis of OCD, but later, during a trial of an antidepressant that had a freakishly negative impact on my psyche, it blossomed into a fully-grown attention-craving condition. Turns out that OCD can be a real hog for the spotlight, really not allowing any of the other diagnoses to take their turn on stage. Thankfully, when I got off that particular antidepressant, those symptoms stopped, but it has led me to be far more aware of my internal obsessive-compulsive thought patterns. For me, OCD largely lacks physical compulsions, but my mind is ablaze with intrusive thoughts, and I will routinely force myself to repeat certain phrases in my head to make them go away. The funny thing is, I never realised that wasn’t normal.

Diagnoses are an attempt to map out a spiders’ web of problems. Things come hand in hand. While I’m no psychologist, I can speak from the perspective of someone who has been through the psychiatric process, which I suppose, lends me a certain kind of expertise, doesn’t it? Maybe it really doesn’t. Maybe I’m just throwing words out there, thinking that I could serve a good purpose, but instead all I am doing is contributing to this great onslaught of digital disinformation we’re all suffering under. But I’m probably just too doubtful of myself. I am speaking about myself, after all. I’ve got first-hand experience in being myself. I know exactly what it feels like to own this skin, these bones, this heart, and this mushy brain of mine. I’m not claiming to know everything. I’m just claiming to know about this one sad individual writing this hoping it might allow someone to reblog my posts with the hashtag “relatable” one day.

Anxiety runs in my family. The neurosis demon gets passed down from generation to generation, only occasionally skipping a beat. My mother and I share many of the same neurotic quirks, though, she has for the most part of her life not had it to quite the excessive degree that I have it. I really took that genetic predisposition for anxiety and ran with it. And while I’m the only person in my family to have gotten diagnosed as being “on the spectrum,” there are a few members that I kinda sort of in a way actually quite seriously suspect might also be here somewhere on the spectrum. Still, as always goes with diagnosing, there’s no point in doing it unless the person is in need of some kind of treatment. I wholeheartedly believe that most people on the planet belong to one spectrum, be it an autism spectrum, a bipolar spectrum, a narcissism spectrum, even a schizophrenic spectrum, but diagnoses should be exclusively reserved for those who need psychiatric care. The world is a spectrum, and it’s worth noting that the terms “sane” and “insane” do not alone capture the complexity of the human psyche. A person can appear perfectly sensible, yet at some point in their life, they may have been a real silly little bugger who thought that their pet hamster was the reincarnation of the Buddha. Just as with physical health, one can struggle with one's mental health for one period in their life, only to later on in life feel utterly and entirely mentally healthy. Or, well, sadly in a lot of cases, people who were perfectly mentally healthy may suddenly become diagnosed with dementia. But that’s really sad, so let’s not talk about that.

Is it all genetic? Well, no. Or well, maybe? In regards to autism, I am pretty sure that, yes, it is genetic. While, yes, I do admit that I’m just a dummy on the internet, so what do I really know? And the brain is such a complex bit of mushy meat, so I could always be proven wrong. Though, I tend towards thinking that there most likely is principally a genetic factor to conditions like autism, or attention deficit disorder (and attention deficit hyperactivity disorder,) or things like bipolar disorder. But with anxiety, quite frankly, I can’t say how much of it is nurture and how much of it is nature. I mentioned that my mother and I share many of the same neurotic quirks, so that would imply that there is something in one's genes that can make some more prone to anxiety than others, but my mother does not struggle with agoraphobia, nor does she seem to have any obsessive-compulsive tendencies. In fact, in my family, even those that exhibit some element of heightened anxiety, they don’t seem to show any milder symptoms of this kind. I can’t help but feel as if these conditions I gained through that tortuous period of every boy’s and girl’s (and boy-girl’s) life is called puberty. I hate to conform to stereotypes but I did indeed hate being a teenager. Believe it or not, I wasn’t a jock, and no, I didn’t go to parties. I mostly spent my time crying.

The question that no doubt plagues every movie psychiatrist to no end is what kind of trauma must a person undergo to make them go mad? Abusive parents? Abusive uncles? Abusive teachers? Abusive dogs? Honestly, to be an adult raising a child must be rough, considering how any mistake you make might suddenly turn your little babe into a future serial killer. Now, there’s no doubt that there are some seriously terrible parents out there, and that a lot of people have mental woes that definitely came about due to their parents and their abysmal lack of parental care. But generally, how much can you actually blame on your parents? We know the cliché, let’s go sit down on the sofa and complain to our Freudian hack-shrink all about those times as a kid our dad missed the big game, or that time our mother embarrassed us in front of all of our friends. I have plenty of things to complain about my parents, like I believe we all have. Our parents are flawed, messy human beings, of course they occasionally made mistakes throughout our upbringings. But is that nearly enough to turn a person mentally ill? Putting up with an at times really embarrassing mom? No, I don’t think so. And of course, there are some real awful parents out there, I’m not doubting that. Trust me, I’m a fan of true crime, so I’ve heard some real grizzly stories of what some kids are forced to grow up with. But I am thinking that those instances are more rare than they are common. Most people with mental illnesses can most likely not blame their parents.

How ‘bout bullies? Yes, them bullies. Them awful mean bullies that made all of our lives so painful. It’s funny, it seems like every school had their own fair share of bullies, and yet no-one as an adult ever comes forward to admit that they themselves were the bullies. It’s almost like as if no-one ever thinks of themselves as being a bully, even when they are throwing rocks at that weird chubby kid with blonde hair who happens to be named Fredrik and who just wants to be left alone. Was I bullied? Well… yes. But I can’t say I got the brunt of it. I got bullied, but overall I’d say I only ever had it slightly worse than most people. I was still quite tall, typically taller than my classmates growing up, and for the most part I could roll with the punches. If you really want to talk about a kid I knew growing up that got bullied, let me tell you about this kid who knew all the right dances for all the right Britney Spears songs. He was gay, I think. Not quite old enough to have come out, I suspect, but, well... He liked all the female pop stars, but not in that way of wanting to kiss them and fondle their boobies, but in the “I want to sound just like them when I grow up” sort of way. I don’t know what happened to him (or them, or her, depending on how they identify now,) but that was real bullying. Like most folks, I found myself stuck in that limbo of seeing others get bullied far worse than me and being too cowardly to intervene, in fears that I’d end up taking their place. Yes, isn’t school just a marvellous place? It’s a wonder any of us turn out okay.

No, I think that, fundamentally, the problems I have arose with myself. This, blaming myself, is not something that I am unused to doing. I have a long history of blaming myself, that’s really the problem. As a teenager I knew that I was different, and I was frightened and scared of being exposed. I didn’t even really know what it was that was different about me, I just knew that I didn’t fit in. I felt as if I didn’t deserve to fit in. The older I got, the more intense these feelings got. And I started taking it out on myself. I started hating myself. And I really mean furiously hating myself. It wasn’t some casual self-loathing, it was searing self-hatred. I did not physically hurt myself, but I did engage with self-harm. I kept repeating the mantras of “I hate myself,” and “I am pathetic,” over and over again, with the ultimate goal of making myself cry. For a period, I couldn’t go to bed without making myself cry first. I began taking days off from school, pretending to be sick. Well, I suppose I was ill, but not physically. I began failing most of my classes, I only ended up doing well in art. I stayed away from school for whole weeks at the time. Once, when I shame-facedly returned to school some of the meaner boys came up to me and said that they were surprised to learn that I was still alive. They were surprised, but also a little disappointed.

This was a time in my life when I really needed psychiatric care. This became increasingly obvious to my parents, and my teachers. I was clearly suffering from depression. Not just some teenaged angst, but full-blown, wholly insidious, depression. But, well, I didn’t get the care that I needed. Oh, I did go to see a psychologist a couple of times, but she saw no reason for me to continue seeing her. I don’t know why she felt as if I wasn’t in need of help, frankly, I can’t fathom why she felt as if I wasn’t in need of help. I suppose I avoided telling her the truth of what went on inside of my head, but I feel like as if any good psychologist would have been able to tell that the kid sitting across from them was clearly suffering from something a tad more intense than just some common concerns about puberty. At most I was able to confess was that I was feeling ashamed over myself for getting so fat, but it should have been clear to anybody that I was only using that as a hook to hang my self-hatred on. There very clearly was some underlying condition that I had that should have gotten addressed. But it went ignored.

At most I can think to explain this is the fact that I wasn’t “problematic.” Not in the way some kids are, when they’re struggling with their mental health. I did not act out, I did not take drugs, and I was certainly not violent. Even to this day, though I have at many times suffered from suicidal ideation, I am a real low-risk for actual suicide considering my intense fear of dying (yes, that’s an odd combo to have.) So, I’ve come to realise that the only way I am getting treatment is if I actually seek out treatment. And back then, I was just as placid as I had previously always been. I was quiet and introverted, just desperate to get back home so I could go and hide in my room. Many teenagers are like that. And it is easy to ignore them, because they want to be ignored. They just don’t want to exist. When you are desperate to be left alone, eventually people will leave you alone. I would go on to receive psychiatric care later on my life, but only after several years passed. I did have a better time living in my later teenage years, but like with a bone that heals wrong, I needed someone to come in and sort me out. I was sad as a teenager, but I would become really sad as a twenty-something. Hopefully my thirties will be jolly.

#neurodiversity #neurodivergent #autism spectrum disorder #autism #aspergers #mental health

[atmilliways]

On the 10th day of Dethmas this writer gives to thee…

Dec 22 - Metalocalypse but it's a cheesy Hallmark holiday movie

He’s a big city notary, only in town to clean out his deceased grandparents’ condo.

He’s a small-town metalhead pot dealer/part time taxi service with no one to hang out with for the holidays.

Is it fate, or is it Christmas?

Chapter one of a Murderface/Pickles, what-if-Dethklok-never-happened AU. I went heavy on Pickles' accent for this and I refuse to apologize for my crimes.

~

Deck The Halls With Ughs & F*ck Yous

When you boiled it down to the bare essentials, the first half of the letter basically said, “Merry Christmas, your grandparents are dead.” 

Which, William felt, was kind of nice of the lawyer writing to him. He hadn’t liked his grandparents particularly much, for all that they’d raised him ever since the unfortunate murder-suicide that had claimed his parents. Everything he’d accomplished in life had been in spite of them. They’d wanted him to be a hubcap salesman like his grandfather; he’d gotten his notary license and done just fine. They’d wanted him to stay in the same kind of podunk towns they always lived in; he’d gone to the big city and landed a steady career notarizing deeds and titles for a huge real estate company. All they’d done was yell at him to make sure was still alive for seventeen years. Anyone could have done that. 

It was the second half of the letter that was the problem. Apparently they’d had no money to leave him, just all the crap in a condo that needed to be emptied out by the end of the year so the next owners could move in. If he didn’t, there would be a ridiculously large fine due of some truly idiotic wording in the lease they’d signed. 

A quick check online told him it would be cheaper to just fly out to this . . . Tomahawk, Wisconsin, throw all the shit in a dumpster, and be done with it. He had a couple weeks of vacation time coming up anyway, with Christmas and New Years, and no particular plans. Why not go? Maybe it would be . . . cathartic or something. 

William sighed and reached to grab a credit card from his wallet. So much for a quiet Christmas to himself, holed up in his  blissfully undecorated apartment with takeout from one of the best sushi places in the entire city. 

~

Tomahawk was pretty much what he expected. Once he made it out of the four-gate airport with a baggage claim so slow that it might have been faster to  walk  instead of fly, it turned out there wasn’t even a taxi queue. He had to go back inside and call one himself. And it wasn’t so much a taxi service as something called “Pickles Cab” scratched in above the payphone.

As long as it had wheels and knew how to find the address, he didn’t much care. The dispatch guy had seemed kinda stoned on the phone, but hey, William figured, that just meant he might be able to find some to buy in the area. 

The car was easy to spot because it was the only non-white thing moving in the snow-caked parking lot. William eyed the shitty old Vista Cruiser in shades of drab green, rust, and beat-to-shit wood paneling skeptically as it pulled up to the loading zone curb at an angle that was, frankly, terrible. The driver put it in park and popped out the driver’s side door with the engine still running, spewing thick steam out of the tailpipe in the frigid air. 

“Hey dood, welcome to Wiscahnsin,” the guy called, waving. “Abandon hope all ye to enter here, heh.” He smirked. William recognized his voice as the person he’d talked to on the phone.

“Uh . . . hi,” William replied awkwardly, hefting his two suitcases, 

“Trunks open. Lemme get it fer ya.” The driver hurried around to the back of the car and opened it for William to toss the suitcases in. He had a shock of red hair trying to escape from his black beanie in all directions, and park-job aside seemed slightly less stoned in person than he sounded. “Wanna sit up front? It’s warmer up here, I’ve had the heat blastin’ all the way here . . . uh, just let me clear some shit out first.”

‘Some shit’ seemed to be a lot of empty bottles and cans and snack wrappers, but William waited patiently because it’s not like this place had any actual taxis he could call instead. When he did climb in and buckle his seatbelt, at least it was warm, as promised, even if it did smell like pot and stale beer. 

The driver popped back in, stripped the glove off one hand, and rubbed at his nose above a vivid red goatee before grabbing the wheel, “Okey, here we go. I’m Pickles, what’s yer name?”

“William Murderfasche,” William replied. What kind of a name was Pickles? But . . . it did explain the name of the ‘cab’ company. 

“Murderface, that’s a fuckin’ cool name. Mind if I just call ya that?”

“. . . Sure.”

“Cool. So dood, Murderface, where to?”

William gave him the address. The car pulled away from the airport with a jerk and he stared out the window at passing snow banks and white-shrouded trees, starting to sink into all his misgivings about the decision to come out here. There was a certain smell that developed anywhere his grandparents inhabited for long enough that he hadn’t realized until moving out on his own kept him in a near-constant state of upset stomach. 

“Hope ya don’t mind there ain’t no radio,” Pickles told him companionably, not appearing to mind when William didn’t react. “Tape deck’s broken too. . . . I’m tryin’ ta save up the money to fix it by givin’ people rides and shit. And doin’ some other stuff too, but don’t tell the cops, heh. All the local stations are pretty much shit anywey, all they’re playin’ right now is fuckin’ Christmas songs.”

“Hm,” William agreed. 

“What kinda music you listen to?”

“Hm. Uh, what? Oh, schorry. Moschtly metal, I guessch.” He shrugged, shaking himself out of the funk he’d been about to sink into. Usually he would prefer to just be left to his own thoughts, but right now the chit chat was actually a welcome distraction. “It’sch good background muschic for conschentrating on not thinking.”

“Hey dood, me too!” In his enthusiasm, Pickles gunned the engine and sent the car into a brief skid on the wintery road, but corrected it with an ease that spoke to lots of practice. “There’s naht much of a metal scene here, fuckin’ sucks. What else am I supposed to get fucked up to, huh? People jest don’t get that. Is it any better where you live?”

William, braced for impact as he now was and would probably remain for the rest of the ride, shrugged again. “I don’t know. I moschtly keep to myschelf, but there are plenty of schtoresch that have deschent schtuff, if you’re willing to schort through all the other crap.”

“Well, cool. Hey if you wanna hang out at all while yer here, I got a pretty good collection on vinyl. Y’know, if you don’t have family shit to do. I’m avoiding mine due to sort of a . . . landlord tenant dispute. They won’t let me put a lock on the house-door to my basement-room, so I’ve got it barricaded and stopped payin’ rent, and now Mahm won’t let me eat anything she cooks. But it’s cool, I’ve gaht an exterior door so I can still get in’n out.”

It took a moment to digest all that, but William noted the invitation with the tentative optimism of a guy who’d moved a lot as a kid but never quite gotten the hang of making friends as a survival method. 

But he was only planning to be in town for a few days, get the condo cleaned out ASAP, and go home, never to return. Not a lot of point in making friends. 

“Thanksch, but I probably won’t have time.” He wasn’t looking directly at Pickles, but he saw the driver’s smile drop a few watts out of the corner of his eye. Feeling bad for the guy, he quickly added, “Schoundsch like you’ve got a pretty good schet-up, though.”

“Eh . . . it’s alright.”

The conversation petered out after that, and William had no idea how to get it going again. He’d always been shit at this sort of thing. Looking back, it was probably a miracle that he’d stuck through high school long enough to graduate, having alienated, avoided, or accidentally insulted enough of his peers that virtually no one on campus had ever willingly spoken to him. The only social group he’d ever successfully infiltrated was the lunchtime stoners that hung out in the park across the street, and that was because they’d mostly just sat around passing joints, trying to blow smoke rings, and napping before having to face sixth period. 

Eventually Pickles put his turn signal on and announced, "Here we go, Christmas Mountain Avenue. Sheesh, that's a little on the nose, huh?"

Privately William agreed, but awkwardly swallowed the chuckle before it could make itself heard. As they pulled up in front of the building, he peered out the window at the gray, shitty condo building and felt his lip curl. Fuck, there was a fridge in there full of rotting food and cans of condensed milk that he was going to have to deal with somewhere in there, he just knew it. 

“Is this where yer staying?” Pickles asked dubiously. 

“No,” William said with a shudder. “Thisch isch juscht the . . . family schit I’m here to deal with. My grandparentsch died and I have to clean out their plache by the end of the month.”

“Ooh.” Scratching thoughtfully at his goatee, he leaned forward to get a better look at the building. “. . . You know, the nearest motel is a ten minute walk and it’s gettin’ dark soon. Yer gonna want a ride, prahbably.”

William blinked. “Oh. I hadn’t thought of that.”

Pickles made a show of looking thoughtful. “So . . . want any help? I gaht reeeeal reasonable rates.”

“Well. . . .”

“And I’ve gaht weed, too,” he added. 

“Done,” William said immediately. 

Well. At least the ordeal would probably be over with sooner this way, and also a lot less horrible with something to blunt the edges (and cover the Smell).

#metalocalypse #12 days of dethmas #metalocalypse fanfic #metalocalypse au #pickleface #william murderface #pickles the drummer

[sluttyten]

you will be my always

Part I: you can call me monster || Part 2: you can be my angel 

summary: forever doesn’t really seem like too much to ask for when you know you’re in love with the supernatural world (and it loves you back just as much)

words: 22,000

pairings: jungwoo x reader, lucas x reader, jungwoo x lucas, jungwoo x reader x lucas

In the last month and a half, many things had changed. The rival pack was run out of town, leaving behind a sizeable amount of wealth as well as a witch and two vampires that they’d been keeping as something similar to pets, so Kun claimed the other pack’s cash and brought the new kids to the vampires for safekeeping. 

YangYang, the young witch, quickly found himself welcomed by Ten. The vampires Xiaojun and Hendery seemed to come as a package deal, and for the first few days they were in the house they didn’t leave each other’s side much until Ten finally pried them apart and got them to hang out with everyone. Hendery apparently fell in love with Ten and Johnny and let them adopt him. Xiaojun fell in with WinWin, and could often be found hanging out with the wolf the second he stepped into the house, much to Yuta’s annoyance. 

And when the last month of winter chill sets in, even several of the vampires decide that the city is too cold to stay in. Yuta, Taeil, and Xiaojun pair up with WinWin for a trip to Paris to explore the catacombs like true Parisian vampires. 

And then there’s the matter of Lucas. 

Specifically, Lucas’s crush on your boyfriend, his slightly smaller (but growing) crush on you, and the fact that the three of you slept together to bring in the new year. 

Nothing else has happened like that between the three of you. Sometimes you think about it, sometimes you and Jungwoo talk about it when you’re in bed together, and he never seems to be strongly leaning one way or the other on actually inviting Lucas back into bed, rather he seems content with just fantasizing about it with you, so you don’t push it. But there are times when you catch Lucas watching Jungwoo and times when you catch him looking at you and you’ll feel that flare of lust in your belly, remembering his hands and his kiss. 

But you don’t push it, and things go back to normal, just the three of you hanging out as friends. 

And you go to school and bury yourself in classwork to distract yourself from the inner conflict of the desire you feel. 

“What are you thinking about?” A foot kicks yours under the table, and you jolt, snapping to attention in the middle of the coffee shop on the edge of your university’s campus. 

Jaehyun sits across from you sipping at his coffee, raising his eyebrows at you. Ten sits beside him, his iced coffee long forgotten as he scribbles sigils and enchantments down in a notebook. 

The three of you are waiting for YangYang who has class for another half hour before you all head back to the coven’s place together. Outside, snow whirls past the windows, and you don’t look forward to going back out there. 

Jaehyun’s foot taps against yours again and you frown at him. 

“Nothing, Jaehyun. Personal stuff.” You glance down at your phone, the background of which is Jungwoo and Lucas making silly faces at you behind the camera. 

Ten doesn’t even look up from his notebook. “She’s thinking about fucking Jungwoo and Lucas. Again.” 

You fight the urge to swear at him, and Ten grins at you. 

“I’m right, aren’t I?” He finally puts the pen down and closes the notebook. “I don’t have to be a mind reader, everyone can feel the tension between the three of you, and once the pack told the rest of us about that menage a trois, it all made sense.” 

You fold your arms across your chest and ignore the pair across the table and the way that they’re smiling at each other, so amused. After they continue trying to talk and you continue ignoring them, Jaehyun finally sits forward. 

“We’re not judging you, if that’s what you think.” He says. “Plenty of people do that polygamy thing, and while it’s a bit odd for a human to be involved with a vampire and a werewolf, especially when human life spans are so short, that’s just…”

Ten harshly elbows Jaehyun and shakes his head. 

“What?” Jaehyun looks between Ten and you. “This is kinda like something Taeyong and I talked about when we first got together. I told him how I didn’t want to be in a relationship where the only outcome could be one of us dying.”

“Seriously, Jaehyun?” Ten asks, then hisses, “You’re a werewolf. You live as long as you want or until something kills you. And you’re telling us, a human and a mortal witch, about that?”

“I didn’t know that werewolves live like that at the time.” Jaehyun mumbles and sips at his coffee. 

You stare down at your fingers wrapped around your cup. This isn’t the first time you’ve heard parts of this. You and Ten already had a discussion about the issues of dating an immortal vampire when you have a human life span. And you hadn’t really thought about it again since then because you didn’t want to think about someday dying and just being another name in Jungwoo’s past. Now you learn that Lucas is essentially immortal too. 

By the time YangYang shows up, bundled in a scarf and hat and coat and complaining about all the snow and cold, you’re still in a deep funk. 

Ten jumps to his feet and shoves the notebook he was scrawling in earlier into YangYang’s arms and begins telling him about heating spells. 

You follow and Jaehyun walks beside you, his head bowed against the cold wind, and when you reach the bus, he falls into the seat beside you. 

“I’m sorry, Y/N. I didn’t mean to make you. . . Existential, I guess.” He gestures around with his hands. “It’s just that when I started dating Taeyong, I thought werewolves were just as mortal as humans. So I kinda know what you’re feeling and I know that you probably don’t want to talk about it, so tell me about something else. Anything to get your mind off of it.”

“Why don’t you talk to me? Tell me more about you and Taeyong.” You tell him, and you lean your head back against the bus seat. “How do a vampire and a werewolf meet and fall in love?”

You watch as a lazy smile drifts across Jaehyun’s lips. He fiddles a little with the strap of his backpack. 

“I haven’t always been a part of Kun’s pack. I was a lone wolf for a while after I was turned, my first several full moons were hell. Like the first time, I thought I was dying. The next few times weren’t much better, and every time it happened when I was out, off campus for the night. I would start feeling strange so I would go somewhere to be alone, feeling like I was going to be sick or that I was dying because my heart was pounding and my skin felt like it was crawling, and within the hour the transformation would start and I would black out and not remember anything until I woke up naked somewhere hopefully within the city. 

“Most of us really just look like stray dogs when we transform, only some of us actually look like wolves. But that’s not my point.” He shakes his hand and starts messing with a bracelet on his wrist, one that you notice has thin silver lines on it, similar to Jungwoo’s daylight ring. But before you can ask, Jaehyun starts talking again. “It was probably my seventh full moon and I was at this bar, this was actually around the time when you and I had class together. You know that bar that our professor was always talking about? It’s on 52nd Street?”

You vaguely recall the place. Your professor would tell the class stories about how he went to that particular bar to observe and talk with people, trying to understand the connections between their psyche and social interactions. 

“I went there that night because he was offering me extra credit,” Jaehyun says. “It was the full moon, but I figured I could gather some info and be out of there before the moon had completely risen. Anyway, I was at the bar taking notes on people and I lost track of time, and before I knew it, I could feel the change beginning to set in. It’s like an ache in your bones, your skin burns a bit and itches. So I ran out of there and I didn’t make it far before I couldn’t go any further so I moved into this alley and I was hunched there trying not to make too much noise, and then suddenly there was a guy in front of me and he was handsome like out of this world handsome, you know? 

“You’ve met Yongie. Of course you know how handsome he is. And he took one look at me, put his hand on my forehead, looked at the moon, and told me to get up. When I tried to argue since I knew I would be transforming within the hour, he just snapped at me that he was taking me to a friend, an alpha. I’m pretty sure my bones started snapping before we got to the den and I passed out from the pain, so Taeyong had to carry me the rest of the way. I was in and out of it after that. Of course, by the time we got to the den, most of the pack had already completed the transformations, so Taeyong did what vampires are good at, and he held me down while I transformed so I wouldn’t hurt myself and his strength and the chill of his skin grounded me and he sat with me after I transformed and I can still remember it. That was the first time I was a wolf and could remember everything. 

“He pet me like I was just a dog and kept talking to me. We were in the main area of the den alone since everyone else was locked in their bedrooms. Like, you’ve seen Lucas’s cuffs chained to the wall? That’s not just some kinky bondage thing,” Jaehyun grins and you cover your face. “Some wolves experience different sorts of transformation, some are more violent than others, so they actually have to be chained down to keep from causing serious damage in the change. But that night I was fine and Taeyong stayed with me all night and in the morning he was still there until I’d turned back. He had to stay the rest of the day, and he introduced me to the pack and Kun took me in, and I’ve not left ever since. And Taeyong took a special interest in me, and honestly I had a very special interest in him too.”

“And you started dating shortly after that?” You ask. 

Jaehyun shakes his head. “No, not right away. Like I said, I had… reservations about going into a relationship with a vampire. But then I had a break from school and there was something Kun wanted me to go fetch for the pack, since I was the newest member he wanted me to do it, but since I’m new I would need some sort of protection since I didn’t understand the ins and outs of supernatural life, and Taeyong volunteered to go with me and claimed he’d always wanted to go to the city Kun said I had to go to. So we made a Spring Break trip of it, although it was definitely not like the breaks you see in the movies. 

“No sunshine, no beaches, no getting drunk.” Jaehyun shakes his head. “We took a flight that left late at night and arrived at night. I didn’t mind being on a nocturnal schedule, like most of the nighttime where we were was daytime here, so it didn’t mess terribly with my brain. And it was while we were on this trip that Tae even indicated that he was actually interested in me.” You notice Jaehyun blushing a little. 

“He was thirsty one night, and you can’t really just let a thirsty vampire roam the streets of a strange, foreign city. He might run into a bad pack of wolves or crazy vampire hunters or any number of bad things. So I offered to let him drink from me, and I know you know how vampires can get when they’re drinking. Some of them get really, really horny. And I’m not saying that Taeyong is one of them, because if I did say that, he would kill me, but after he was done drinking that night he was so embarrassed.” And now Jaehyun’s ears burn bright red. “When I suggested it was alright that he was feeling that way, Taeyong got more embarrassed and he tried acting tough and not embarrassed, but he was and I loved it.

“So it wasn’t like a Spring Break with the sunshine and the beaches and getting drunk, but it did involve nudity and drinking of a different sort.” He grins and runs his hands over his hair then reaches down to fiddle with his bracelet again. “I kinda consider that whole trip to be our first date because it was when I realized that I really loved him, you know. Like I thought he was great before that and I really liked him and we were close, like good friends, but that trip was the big step, and while we were there, away from all of this, it really cemented these feelings and I knew that the way I felt about him was real.”

“And what’s this bracelet?” You tap his wrist where he’s still messing around with the jewelry.  

Jaehyun looks down and twists it around a few times before he nods at Ten who’s sitting a few rows ahead of you two with his head bowed toward YangYang’s over the notebook. “This is a gift from Ten. Shortly after I found a home with the pack and learned about the vampires and ghosts and everything being real, I walked in on Ten doing a spell in the bathroom at school. I think he nearly shit himself when I walked in and he was standing there with his lightning running over his fingertips. I think he would’ve wiped my memory, which he has threatened to do since then for a different reason, but when I told him I was a werewolf he relaxed a bit. Then I brought him around the pack and when we were talking about the full moon coming up, Ten listened and then made us these. They ease the transformation and make it less painful and quicker.”

“Clever.” You touch the bracelet again, and you swear you can feel a static tingle under your fingers. “Do you think it’s kinda similar to the ring he gave Jungwoo?”

He shrugs. “He made almost a dozen of these bracelets, but he’s only made the one ring. If I had to say, I think this is a less complex magic than the ring. But you’d really have to ask the magician and his apprentice.” Again he casts a look at the two witches. “I do wish the ring were an easier spell for him to do. I would love to give Taeyong a ring like that.” Jaehyun pauses and then sighs in a sweet, lovesick kind of way. “Or any ring honestly, but don’t tell him I said that.”

You pretend to lock your lips shut, his secret safe within. “I’m sure if you asked Ten, he could work on it, especially with YangYang and Jisung’s help. They could pool enough power to get Taeyong a magical daylight wedding ring.”

Jaehyun smiles and you see the tips of his ears are turning red. “Can you imagine me married?” He laughs and his eyes are far-off, a smile etched on his face. “Me married to a daylight vampire? He could come to see me play a whole basketball game. He could see me graduate at the end of the semester. And, like I said don’t tell him this, but literally the day after our first date I was already picturing marrying him, which is so stupid but shit Taeyong looks handsome in a tux, and I think a spring wedding would be so nice with cherry blossoms and sunlight.”

You can picture it. Jaehyun and Taeyong holding hands at an outdoor ceremony, smiling and crying because they’re both emotional guys. You can picture them living a happy life, living an actual eternity together as they swear to do in their vows. 

You feel a knot settling in your stomach at all of this talk. You want that too. You want to be happy and have an eternity with Jungwoo. 

When at last the bus comes to the stop near the vampires’ mansion, you nearly leap over Jaehyun and hurry out of the bus, running toward the house. Snowflakes bite against your cheeks, and in the distance you see the sunset burning through a break in the snowstorm. 

You burst through the front door of the house, and you’re halfway up the stairs when Jungwoo appears at the top, looking worried. 

“What’s wrong? Why are you running?” His voice sounds panicked, and you’re certain that he’s heard the loud pounding of your heart and it’s made him worry. You climb the rest of the stairs and don’t waste a second before you loop your arms around his waist and press your cheek to his chest. 

“I love you, Jungwoo.” 

Swiftly, Jungwoo lifts you into his arms and carries you the rest of the way to his bedroom. You’ve barely crossed the threshold of his room when you notice that you’re not alone in there. 

You pull your face from your boyfriend’s chest and look across the room to where Lucas is sitting in the chair in the corner. He looks up when you drop to the floor. 

“Lucas.” You say his name in a tone similar to the one you’d just used with Jungwoo at the top of the stairs. Somewhat tired, somewhat sad, somewhat needy. As you cross the room toward him, Lucas glances behind you at Jungwoo, and you don’t care what that means, you reach the chair and you climb in and sit on his lap. 

Lucas’s hands go immediately to your hips, securing your place in his lap. 

“What are you doing?” He asks, and once again he’s glancing between you and Jungwoo, confusion and alarm bleeding into his tone. 

It’s then that you realize, while you and Jungwoo have discussed the threesome and have discussed Lucas since that morning on the first of the year, Lucas has mostly been in the dark on the subject. For all he knows that was a completely one-off occasion that neither you nor Jungwoo wants to revisit even a mention of. 

But now you’re sitting in his lap, and he doesn’t know what’s happening or what to do. And when you look back at Jungwoo, he sort of seems to be in the same position as Lucas: confused, unsure what to do. So you just say the first thing on your mind. 

“Let’s get away. All three of us. Let’s go on a trip together and just relax and have fun and escape the cold.” Jaehyun’s words echo in your mind, the part of his story where getting away with Taeyong has helped them cement their feelings in the relationship. “I know the cold doesn’t bother either of you, but I’m tired of it.” You lean back a little and feel Lucas’s fingers twist in the back of your shirt. 

His eyebrows meet in the middle as he frowns a little. “Where would we go? And why? Don’t you have school right now?”

“Forget about that. I want to get away for a while.” You turn to look at Jungwoo. “Please, Woo. You mentioned Taeil has an island once, right? We could go there for the ultimate relaxation.”

“You want to take a vampire to a tropical destination? Even a sunburn-proof vampire’s going to be a bit hesitant about that.” Lucas laughs a little, but you don’t hear a no coming from either one of the men in the room with you. 

You reach out a hand to Jungwoo, and he messes a hand through his hair and glances out the nearby window. The curtains are thrown open to show off the grayness of the snowstorm outside. 

“Jungwoo, come on. Think about it. You, me, a beach.” You slide back in Lucas’s lap until your back rests against his chest. “And Lucas.” 

Lucas’s hands tighten on you, and Jungwoo turns his gaze to your corner of the room again. His eyes are a hungry shade hovering just between his calm black and the angry red, like a warm, molten treacle. 

The room is silent for a moment, so quiet that you think you can hear snowflakes brushing against the window, the world holding its breath while Jungwoo stares at you seated in the lap of his secret desire. 

“Alright,” Jungwoo sighs finally. “But I’ll have to ask if we can borrow his island. And how to get there. No guarantees, sunshine.” 

You bound out of Lucas’s lap and jump into Jungwoo’s arms again, wrapping yourself around him as he holds you up and spins around a few times before he settles you down on the bed. And as you look around at the two of them, you notice that they’re both smiling too. 

The plane touches down, and all you can see is the glimmer of turquoise water, the gleam of white sand beaches. 

Beside you, Jungwoo shields his eyes against the light and pulls his hat lower over his face as Lucas leans across him, trying to get a glimpse out the window. He whistles appreciatively. 

You’re not quite to your destination yet.

The instructions Jungwoo got from Taeil said that this flight was only the first part. 

When Taeil claimed the island as his several hundred years before, he’d made certain it was private, far away from nearby civilization. It was where he’d napped while Doyoung and Jungwoo were off exploring the world, and Taeil hadn’t wanted to be disturbed by human explorers, and therefore chose an island safely out at sea, the most moderately sized one that he could find. Not so big that it would draw unwanted attention, but not so small that it would get swept away in a storm. 

After he’d woken from his nap, he’d had a house built on the island and it was a fertile little place with a decently sized forest on it that flourished with life. All sorts of little creatures and vegetation that he was pretty sure was edible for humans. 

So it sounded as close to paradise as you could find, but even as the plane touched down on the tarmac, you still had a long way to go. 

“Where do we go after this?” You asked Jungwoo again, slipping your hand into his. 

“Take a smaller plane to an island. Then an even smaller plane from there to another island. Then we rent a boat and follow the coordinates he gave me to Tai Ilisam as the locals call it.” He starts playing with your fingers as the other passengers on the plane begin climbing to their feet, crowding the center aisle even though no one will be getting off the plane for at least a few more minutes. 

On Jungwoo’s other side Lucas says, “What locals? I thought you said it was private.”

“It is.” Jungwoo smiles. “The last island we’re flying into, those people have names for all the smaller islands around, but Taeil says that they avoid Tai Ilisam because it’s haunted by a violent spirit that wrecks ships and feeds off the survivors.”

“That doesn’t sound like the Taeil we know.” You lean into Jungwoo’s shoulder. 

Jungwoo shakes his head. “That’s the Taeil that I first knew. He’s tried befriending the island people since that time, but the legend lives on and they think that Taeil’s the descendant of the only person to ever survive a shipwreck on Tai Ilisam. He also said they probably think he’s possessed, and when we come back they’ll treat us like we’re possessed too.”

“I’ll keep that in mind,” Lucas smirks. “Do we think gold eyes will make them feel like I’m possessed?” When he leans forward, hiding his face from the aisle, you and Jungwoo have a clear view of Lucas’s wolfishly golden eyes. 

A few minutes later, the plane begins to empty, and the three of you follow the rest of the passengers out. The layover isn’t long, just barely enough time to navigate through the airport to where your next plane awaits. That flight isn’t long, and you nap with your head on Jungwoo’s shoulder while Lucas peers out the window at the ocean passing by below. 

You’re still hazy with sleep as you leave that flight and make it to the next plane which is tiny and barely more than a mail plane heading to the small island before Tai Ilisam. It’s a rickety plane that jolts and shudders and creaks and beeps too much for your liking, so you spend the entire flight clinging to both Jungwoo and Lucas, figuring that if the plane goes down, the two supernatural men are your best bet at survival. 

But the plane touches down safely, the pilot thanks you for flying, and reminds you that he’ll be back at the same time the following week unless it’s storming, and if you want a flight back to do it then. 

And then the last leg of the journey finally begins. 

As Jungwoo treks ahead of you, using the notes he’s got from Taeil to find his way to the docks to find a boat to rent for the week, Lucas slings his arm over your shoulders and walks with you. 

You straggle a bit behind Jungwoo, distracted as you pass through this town’s island. It’s a decent size, and you can tell that they do get the occasional tourist and they probably are the supply hub for the surrounding smaller private islands like Taeil’s island. 

Lucas convinces you to stop in the marketplace because there’s all kinds of delicious food, and as he’s feeling more human than wolf at the moment, his appetite is more human, so the pair of you buy fruit and vegetables and meat and pack it all in a cooler before hurrying along to find Jungwoo at the docks, which the locals kindly direct you toward. 

Tai Ilisam, it turns out, is a two hour boat ride away, so you climb in the boat Jungwoo rented and set out across the sea. 

And when you see the island come into view, you gasp. The sand is a beautiful pink, contrasting with the vibrant blue of the water and the green of the island’s vegetation, and through the trees at the edge of the beach, you see shining glass. 

Jungwoo pulls the boat nicely up to a dock, and Lucas helps him tie it up. 

“Why did Taeil build a place here if he can’t live in the sun?” You ask, jumping from the boat onto the dock and you run to the sand, kicking off your shoes because you want to feel the sand between your toes. 

A moment later Jungwoo is right behind you, grabbing your hand and swinging you around, spinning you across the sand like it’s a dance floor. 

“He knew that if he ever needed to get away, such as escape from the rare vampire hunters, this would be the perfect place.” He says as you spin to face him. Jungwoo squints from under the bill of his cap. “He figured no one would think to look for a vampire on this tiny island where the sun shines so brightly, without humans around to feed on.”

Jungwoo grins wickedly and tightens his arms around your waist and bends you backwards until his mouth presses to your throat. 

You close your eyes and dig your fingers into Jungwoo’s arms, sigh at the feeling of his lips, the hint of his teeth. You so badly want him to bite you right then, have his venom coursing sweetly through your veins. 

“But now I’ve lured a human here and I have no plans of letting you leave.” He attacks your throat with little kisses, peppering them up your jaw and your cheeks. 

You laugh and wrap your arms around his neck, pulling yourself up as Jungwoo stands upright, and you stretch up on your toes and kiss him. 

“Is this how it’s going to be all week?” Lucas stands a few feet off. Holding his suitcase in one hand, the cooler of food in the other, and your bag and Jungwoo’s are thrown over his shoulders. “Don’t tell me you invited me along to be a third wheel.”

Jungwoo turns to look at Lucas with a soft smile. “Jealousy is a good look, Lucas. I guess, there’s some stuff we all need to talk about.”

You detach yourself from Jungwoo and cross the sand between you and Lucas. You take your bag from him and Jungwoo takes his, and the three of you set off for the house just behind the cover of the trees. 

Taeil’s island home isn’t elegant, it’s just a basic home built to withstand the strain of tropical existence. You’re not surprised to find that there’s only a single bedroom and a bare office, both windowless, and the windows of the house that look out onto the pink sand beach and the gorgeous ocean beyond are heavily curtained to not allow in any sunlight. 

Lucas hesitates in the doorway of the bedroom, looking over his shoulder at the sofa in the large open main room. You can see the wheels turning in his head, and the moment he begins to turn to walk back to the sofa, you grab his hand and pull. 

“You’re not sleeping out there. Don’t be ridiculous.”

The bed is massive, definitely big enough to comfortably fit Jungwoo, Lucas, and yourself. “You’re not third-wheeling with us.”

Jungwoo takes Lucas’s suitcase and sits it inside the bedroom, and then he steps closer and rakes his fingers through Lucas’s already wind-blown hair, messing it up even further. “I know we haven’t talked about that night. New Year’s Eve, I mean. We just kinda glossed it over, but she and I have talked about it a bit. And I’ve been thinking,” Jungwoo slips his fingers through Lucas’s belt loops. “I think it could be fun to see what else we can do.” 

And right then you see it. A snap of a connection, a jolt of lust that glows within Lucas’s eyes, and you know that if you don’t separate them now, you won’t get to just relax totally peacefully on the island for this first night. 

As great as sex is, especially when one or both of them is involved, you just want a quiet, enjoyable night. Cooking the food you’ve brought, watching the sunset, maybe going for a swim before dark or building a fire or stargazing. 

And maybe it’s a bit selfish, but you don’t want them to mess around together without you. Because Jungwoo is your boyfriend. 

“Let’s go check out the beach.” You insist. “I want to take pictures to send home. My mom will be so jealous when she sees this place.” 

Distracted, not only by your plans of exploration, but also by the talk about your mother, Jungwoo let’s go of Lucas. “When do I get to meet her anyway? Does she even know we’re together?”

You hadn’t told Jungwoo much about your history before university. He knew bits and pieces from things you slipped into casual conversation, but he had yet to meet your parents or anyone that knew you before you came to the university. You rarely ever spoke about parents or siblings or grandparents, and Jungwoo didn’t push.

“She knows all about you. You’re all I talk about when I call her, you and Lucas, and some of the stuff we get into.” You smile and reach for both of the boys. “Now let’s go before it gets dark.”

Maybe in the interim time you’d forgotten the shape of Lucas’s body or the feel of his skin under your fingers, the broadness of his shoulders, the shift of muscle under skin. But now you’re all too aware of every bit of that. 

You gasp and clutch at his arm. 

“You’re so clumsy!” Lucas teases, wrapping his arm around you so that the next wave doesn’t knock you over entirely. “No wonder Jungwoo’s so protective about you, baby.” 

Lucas holds tightly to you as another wave rolls past, and the pair of you struggle a few feet further into the sea. 

The taste of salt tingles on your tongue and you look around, searching for the shape of Jungwoo, sunbathing on a rock a short distance from the shore. He’s got his eyes closed, his arms folded behind his head, and he’s totally naked except for the ring on his finger. 

He’s your destination at the moment. And as Lucas swings you around in front of him, blocking you from another wave while his fingers simultaneously tickle down your sides causing you to shriek with laughter, you begin to wonder if he’s helping you on your journey or hindering you, but also, you don’t really mind. 

You climb up his body, wrapping your legs around his waist, pressing your chest to his back, and your arms go firmly around his shoulders. Another wave crashes against you, washing over your lower half, and even Lucas stumbles a step forward. 

Jungwoo doesn’t even look your way, too busy soaking in the precious sunlight he was denied for so long. 

The rock he’s on isn’t nearly big enough for the three of you, but you climb on and sit beside him, carefully wringing out your hair onto his skin. You watch in amusement as Jungwoo opens an eye to look at you. His nipples perk up from the chill and you’re tempted to lean down and lick at his chest, taste the salt and sun on his skin. 

Then a shadow stretches across the rock. 

“Has anyone ever told you that you look like a god?” Jungwoo asks, shielding his eyes a little as he looks up at Lucas. The sun sits behind his head, gilding his hair, and water drips from his body and you feel your heart drop into your belly, pulsing and fluttering, so you squeeze your legs together. 

“All the time.” Lucas grins. He doesn’t sit down, there’s not enough room, instead he continues standing there, looking godly and too hot for you. After another minute you have to look away from him, casting your gaze toward the shore and the house. 

This is your first full day on Tai Ilisam. Last night was short and none of you lasted too long after arriving. You walked some length down the beach, Jungwoo gave you a piggyback ride back to the house, and then you made a quick dinner and fell asleep, exhausted from the day of travel. 

You’re convinced that after you fell asleep your vampire and your werewolf companions masterminded a wicked plan to make you as frustrated as possible all day long. 

From the moment you woke until this moment sitting here on the rock, it seems that they’ve been doing as much as possible to make you horny. 

You woke in bed between the two of them. You were halfway on top of Jungwoo with your leg thrown over one of his, his thigh pressed against your center. Lucas was beside you and at some point in the night your hand had fallen into his lap, and at the moment when you woke, your hand was lightly holding his slightly hard cock. 

You were certain they planned it. 

And then when you got out of the bathroom you found them in the kitchen, both shirtless, Jungwoo standing closely behind Lucas to watch as the wolf prepared a breakfast. And then you’d watched as Jungwoo ate his breakfast fresh from Lucas’s throat, his lips sealed against Lucas’s skin. 

Then the morning passed in a blur of boys’ bare skin and too much hands as they rubbed lotion on you to make sure you were protected from the sun, and each touch on your skin drove you a little more crazy. 

But you didn’t come on this vacation just for sex in an exotic location, you wanted to have other fun and explore the island. Feel the sun on your skin and the sea all around you. So that’s what you were doing right now. But you’d be lying if you said that you didn’t want to fuck both of them right now and every moment since dawn. 

You shiver when you feel the coolness of Jungwoo’s ring against your skin, and for once his fingers hold warmth without taking it from you first. 

“What are you thinking about?” He asks. “We can hear your heartbeat.” 

You press your hand to your chest and realize that your heart is pounding. 

Jungwoo sits up, his posture perfect even in this relaxed paradise, even on this less than comfortable rock. His fingers move high on your thighs, stroking in what could be an absentminded manner except that you know it’s not. 

“Race you to shore!” You call, avoiding answering his question as you climb quickly to your feet, and you dive off the rock, swimming as quickly as you can toward the pink beach. But even then, when you stand and wipe the sea water from your eyes, Jungwoo stands there in all his naked glory, and Lucas laughs beside him, shaking his hair like a wet dog might. 

The longer you watch the way that they’re both acting with you, the more you realize that Jungwoo is the one pushing you, teasing you, trying to get you to the point where you’ll be so turned on you can’t deny it anymore. 

So you wait. 

You relax for a while on the beach, reading a book and sitting in one of the three comfy chairs Jungwoo helped you drag down from the house’s enclosed back porch. 

Lucas and Jungwoo wrestle and fight out in the water, howling with laughter so loudly you’re certain they’ve scared off any of the island’s wildlife. Once you look up when you notice they’ve grown quiet and they’re both watching you while Jungwoo talks to Lucas and you feel heat flooding your belly, and you want to part your legs and give them a tease or puff out your chest or something that will tease them back the way you’ve felt all day, but they turn away and go back to what seems to be trying to catch fish with their bare hands. But you swear that the next time you catch them looking you’ll do something for a show. 

You don’t have to wait long. 

You hear one of them coming out of the water, slopping toward you, and it’s Lucas. 

Jungwoo stands out in the water, watching the horizon, and Lucas sighs and collapses down into the chair beside you, props his feet up and closes his eyes. 

“Jungwoo was telling me something interesting.” He rolls his head to the side to look at you.

“Like what?” 

“Well we didn’t get to talk really last night, you know. You and I fell asleep pretty quick after dinner, so there wasn’t much to say, but Jungwoo was just saying that you seem to like revisiting our time together.” His crooked smile snags at your attention and you can’t look away. “He said that you guys have talked about it sometimes like when you’re in bed, about to have sex, even in the middle of sex. Is it true that you —“

You don’t let him finish whatever he was going to say. The book you were reading falls into the sand as you move from your chair into Lucas’s, swinging your leg over his and you settle down into his lap, put one hand to the joint of his neck and his shoulder, and you lean in until you’re just inches from his lips and you brush some of his damp hair back from his forehead. 

Lucas looks up at you with wide, soft eyes and his lips part around a sigh. You shift your hips ever-so-slightly against him and do that several times until you can feel him responding. 

“Do you think he can hear us from here?” You whisper, circling your hips and you brush your lips along Lucas’s cheekbone then touch them to his ear as you continue, “Or is he too focused on the sea?”

Lucas’s hands slide up to your hips. “He can’t hear.”

Still moving, grinding along Lucas’s length, you whisper, “Did he tell you the things he told me when we were in bed? About how after that night he’s thought about you? He told me he had a dream, and vampire dreams are rare, where he had his fingers inside you and your cock was dripping wet for him. You were whimpering and whining his name. He said he fingered you until you were begging for him to fuck you, but instead he let me ride him and cum as many times as I wanted while you watched.”

You feel his cock twitch under you. His breath comes out shakily. You climb off his lap, satisfied with what you’ve done, the tent in his shorts is obvious.

And you leave him there, just like that. 

“Jungwoo!” You jog across the beach, into the water, and you wade out to Jungwoo, who turns around to greet you. 

You stand out there in the ocean with him for a while longer. He points to shapes on the horizon that you can barely even see, he catches tiny fish and cups them in his hands, and when he dives down into the water, searching for a shell to give you, he comes back up by swimming right up to you and kissing your stomach as he surfaces, then lifting you up before he presents you with a beautifully intact sea shell. 

You’re so wrapped up in each other, that you don’t notice when Lucas leaves the beach and returns to the house until you’re walking out of the water and your eyes fall on the empty chairs. 

“Where did he go?” Jungwoo looks around, holding tightly to your hand. He scans the water and the surrounding trees, he tilts his head in a way that tells you that he’s listening, and then he nods at the house. “He’s in there. I can hear the shower running. I still wanted to go walk further around the island.” He pouts a little and you squeeze his hand. 

“Do you think I could have upset him?” You tug on his fingers. “He was trying to tease me, I think, about you telling him that we’ve talked about him in bed, and I told him about that dream you had.” 

Jungwoo’s eyes darken a bit. “Do you think Lucas would be upset by that? He’s made of sturdier stuff than that.”

“I may have been grinding on him and telling him about that, then I left him hard and went to you.” You duck your head and drag your toes through the sand. “But in my defence, the two of you have been trying to make me horny all day, and I was tired of it. I wanted to have some fun.”

“So we’ll have fun. Come on, sunshine.” He starts toward the house, and you follow, falling into step beside him. Jungwoo swings your hands comfortably, and when you reach the house he plucks the shell from your finger and sits it on a nearby table, then he turns to you and very seriously says, “If you want this, like if you really, really want to have the three of us together again, are you going to be happy and comfortable if I have sex with Lucas?”

 “That’s… Is that happening now?” You glance toward the door of the bedroom where you can hear the water running. 

Jungwoo touches your waist. “He knows how we both feel, why not do it now? And don’t think that I don’t want you involved, I definitely do. Us and Lucas though?” Jungwoo shakes his head and whistles, “We’d be hot.” 

His smile is innocent enough, but the look in your boyfriend’s eyes is anything but. You’d be crazy to tell him no right now, not when you can see how much he wants this, and then there’s how much you want Lucas too, and you know that whatever makes both of them happy is going to make you happy as well. 

Jungwoo’s hand sneaks down from your waist to your ass, and you swat at his hand, and he pulls it away, smiling wider. “Remember that day in the library at home when you wanted to baby me?” He leans in and bends down so he can press his lips to your throat. “When you were biting me and wanted to call me a slut. I bet we can get Lucas like that for us, angel.” 

You shiver as his cool fingers run up your spine, and when they reach the tie of your swimsuit top, he tugs on it lightly and everything comes undone. Your top comes apart, sliding off your shoulders. The last vestiges of your reluctance to have your boyfriend fuck his best friend with you disappear. You’re entirely completely totally ready.

“Lucas is waiting,” you whisper as Jungwoo’s lips move over your throat again. His fangs scrape lightly over your jugular, and his hands wander down to your ass again, though this time you allow him to touch, to push your swimsuit bottoms down your legs, leaving you naked and slightly self-conscious. 

Last time, it seemed like everything just happened quickly. It fell into place and worked and you didn’t have a minute to doubt what was happening, it was purely based on desires and lust. But now you have time to think. 

With each step through the house, through the bedroom, into the bathroom, you think about the sand on your body, the way your fingers and toes are pruned from being in the water for so long. You think about the shape of your breasts, the slight prickle of your unshaven legs and your overall hair situation. Jungwoo’s never complained about it, but now you find yourself doubting everything. A tight knot grows tighter in your stomach and you cling to Jungwoo’s hand as you step through the bathroom door together. 

Steam fills the bathroom, creating condensation on the mirror over the double vanity and the window that looks out into the dense forest occupying the interior of the island. Lucas stands in the shower under the hot water, his back to the pair of you. His shoulders are turning pink from the heat of the water, but it doesn’t seem to bother him at all, and he just lets it soak over his body.

You’re not sure if he even really knows that you and Jungwoo are there until the moment Jungwoo steps into the shower and presses his cool hands on Lucas’s shoulders.

The werewolf spins around quickly. He looks first at Jungwoo, his eyes, his lips, and he doesn’t shy away when Jungwoo takes another step closer. Then he looks at you, noticing all of your beautiful bare skin, the shape of you hazy through the steam, the way that you’re holding yourself. 

Jungwoo presses his fingers to Lucas’s chin, drawing his eyes (which grow more golden by the second) back to Jungwoo’s mouth. 

“Why did you leave us out there?” Jungwoo asks. “We weren’t quite finished playing and exploring. I wanted to see the rest of the island, but then you were gone.” 

You step closer, into the shower itself, and you let the warm water wash over you, rinsing away the sand that clings stubbornly to your skin. Lucas looks at you for just a moment, and then Jungwoo’s lips are on his throat. You see a flash of white teeth, a glimpse of red swiped away by a pink tongue, and then Lucas’s big hands are on Jungwoo’s hips to pull him closer. 

“Now we’re going to have to play and explore something else.” Jungwoo says, fixing his mouth onto Lucas’s throat again, but this time he doesn’t bite, he just kisses across Lucas’s pulse. “She told me that she told you about the dream and how hard you were hearing about it. Is that why you came in here, Xuxi?” 

Lucas groans, and you watch as Jungwoo’s hand disappears between their bodies. Lucas’s head falls back against the wall of the shower, and Jungwoo reaches up to cup the back of his head, his lips still busy on Lucas’s throat. You watch Jungwoo’s arm moving, and you can only assume that he’s jerking Lucas off. 

“Jungwoo.” Lucas’s moan reverberates off the walls of the shower, and his eyes close in pleasure. “God, please.”

“Shh.” Jungwoo bites down on his throat again and Lucas’s legs buckle a little bit. Jungwoo’s hands move so both of them hold Lucas’s hips, and you lean back against the cold tile, the contrast between it and the steamy heat of the shower is electric on your skin, made better by the visual in front of you as Jungwoo grinds their cocks together between their bodies.

Lucas whines and bucks. 

Jungwoo’s pretty lips curve against Lucas’s throat, and he manhandles him, twisting them around with their feet making quiet splashing sounds on the shower floor. And suddenly it’s Lucas whose back is to you, and you make your move to join in. 

You slide your hands over Lucas‘s waist, fingers splaying over his skin, and you press up against his back, your lips brushing his skin. 

He moans again, leaning into your touch and Jungwoo’s, unsure of which one of you he should fall into more. 

Jungwoo’s lips unlatch from his throat, and your hands range higher until your thumbs flick over his nipples. It’s so easy to make Lucas fall apart you’re learning. The last time there wasn’t really too much time to focus on him, so you don’t think he was so pliable for you two, but right now he’s like putty in your hands. 

“Are you gonna cum for us, Xuxi?” Jungwoo asks. You look up just in time to see him licking his lips while staring Lucas straight in the eye. “When you cum then we’re going to bed and she and I are going to take you apart bit by bit. That’s what you want right?”

Lucas bites his lip and just rocks his hips to meet Jungwoo’s. 

“Lucas.” You speak for the first time, your hand dropping down until you can wrap your fingers around both Lucas and Jungwoo’s erections. You drag your lips over his skin, a quick hint of teeth. “Cum for us.” 

You drag your hand up and down their combined lengths, and Lucas moans loudly, a choked off and stuttering sound that is soon swallowed by Jungwoo. And Lucas cums over your hand, his load hot and huge, you keep touching them both until Jungwoo pushes your hand away and he steps back under the shower’s spray. He rakes his fingers through his hair, moving the damp locks away from his forehead. 

You’ve all three got Lucas‘s cum on you, so you take a few minutes to shower off, and as the water begins to run cold, you bolt out to wrap in a towel and dry off. The boys linger for a few more moments as neither of them are much affected by the water temperature, and also because Jungwoo’s very distracted by Lucas’s ass, which Lucas has been slowly touching throughout this shower time. 

By the time they step out of the shower, looking flushed and damp, you’re reclining on the bed, your towel wrapped around your body.

“She looks lovely,” Lucas says, draping his arms over Jungwoo’s shoulders from behind. “And she smells so good. Can you smell her?” He lifts his face and closes his eyes, breathing deeply. Your body tingles and you squeeze your legs together a little bit, trying to ignore the pulse of need that goes through you right then. 

Jungwoo reaches up to untangle Lucas’s arms from his shoulders, and with his hold on the wolf’s wrists, he pulls him around in front of him. They stare at each other for a moment, and then Jungwoo presses forward and you watch in delight as your boyfriend pecks Lucas on the lips and tells him, “Do you want to taste her, pup?”

Lucas moans. 

“Go have a taste then.” Jungwoo gives him a light push. “She loves to be eaten out, Xuxi. She especially loves when I bite her thighs and eat her out. Though your venom will make her feel a little different.”

Jungwoo strokes Lucas’s hair again, and then the younger drops down onto the edge of the bed and turns to look at you. His eyes gleam faintly golden, and when he opens his mouth you see his canines look a little sharper. Different than whenever Jungwoo’s fangs start to really show, but still the appearance of sharp teeth sends a vague thrill through you.

“You’ve never been bitten by me, have you?” Lucas asks. The mattress shifts as he crawls into the spot between your legs. 

His fingertips drag gently up from your ankle to your knee and then higher still. You shiver and bite your lip, try not to whine as you shake your head in response to his question.

“I’ve heard that it feels different than a vampire bite, but still very good. I’m not taking anything from you, just giving you something good.” Lucas’s fingertips meet the edge of your towel, and he lifts that golden gaze to your eyes, checking to see if you’re good, and when he sees no sign of hesitance in your eyes, he continues. 

With a flick of his wrist, the towel falls apart, exposing your body to him and to Jungwoo. Jungwoo takes a step forward, his eyes flashing, his fangs peek out. A low growl sounds from deep in Lucas’s throat and he dips his head to kiss your abdomen, just below your navel. You gasp and reach down, running your hand over the back of his head. 

“Once Taeyong, Ten, and I were having a discussion about our sex lives,” Lucas says, sitting up once more. “And Taeyong told us that when Jaehyun bites him during sex it feels like he’s high. Ten was curious, so I bit him, and he said it was just euphoric and we weren’t even doing anything sexual. Just sitting there while it raced through his veins.”

“Wouldn’t a bite turn me?” You gasp as his fingers skate up your inner thigh, ranging dangerously close to your pussy. “That sounds amazing, but I don’t want to be a werewolf, thanks.”

Jungwoo slides up the bed, suddenly there beside you, cradling your head in his lap. “No, sunshine. The bite is only effective at the full moon.”

Lucas nods, and again he lowers his mouth to your skin, gently nipping at your thigh. “I wouldn’t risk turning you. I would never intentionally put you in harm’s way like that.” He nuzzles against your thigh, dragging his nose closer to your center, and he makes that possessive growling noise again. “Now, enough talking, right? You smell like heaven, and I just want a taste.”

“Please.” You touch his hair and shift your hips on the bed. “Bite me if you want to, I don’t mind.”

Lucas dives right in, thumbs pressing to the sensitive joint to part your thighs more for him, and he licks right over your entrance, lapping there for a moment before moving higher to pay attention to your desperate clit. 

“Fuck, Lucas!” You moan reaching out for anything, and your hand lands on Jungwoo’s thigh, holding tight. He licks and sucks and slurps and Jungwoo just holds you while Lucas’s tongue takes you to ecstasy. When you feel a sharp prick on your thigh, you glance down and see his lips pressed to your skin, a faint gleam of teeth, and when he looks up at you his fangs are tipped with blood. You whimper and he drops his head back down, returning to your pussy.

Soon you feel his venom starting to take effect. You feel light and warm and not in the way that means your orgasm is approaching, but just better than that almost. You grow more vocal, moaning and swearing, even laughing a little too.

Jungwoo smiles down at you, stroking your cheek and your hair, touching your lips with his fingertips. You roll your hips against Lucas’s face, riding his tongue deep inside you. Jungwoo touches your chest, stroking lightly to stimulate the sensitive skin of your breasts, tracing circles around your nipples and tweaking the pert buds. 

You feel your orgasm shredding through you, tearing you apart like beams of light, sparking and shooting across your closed eyelids. Lucas keeps licking at you, moaning and grinding his erection against the bed, savoring every drop you’re offering up to his eager tongue. 

“Lucas.” Jungwoo calls his name in a voice so soft but commanding. 

Lucas breaks away from his last few lingering licks, looking up at Jungwoo with his eyes glowing. “Yeah?”

“Come here.” Jungwoo crooks a finger at the wolf, and then Lucas is shooting up, leaning over you to meet Jungwoo in a messy kiss, sharing the taste of you from his tongue to Jungwoo’s. Their mouths collide with a slight crash and moans, but the flash of tongues and teeth and your cum on Lucas’s lips takes over. 

You lay there beneath them, Lucas’s body halfway over yours, your head still in Jungwoo’s lap. As Lucas shifts up onto his knees, moving higher to better be able to kiss Jungwoo, his cock swings forward between his legs, just almost within reach of your mouth. Even though you’ve just cum, a powerful fire blazes in your gut, hungry and horny, you want more. It’s probably thanks to his venom you feel this way, but you don’t care. You just need.

Lucas moans when your forehead touches his abdomen, and when he feels your lips around his tip, he actually startles a bit. “Still a bit sensitive, angel. Careful.” He hisses, but he rocks forward slightly. 

You keep your eyes open, looking up as the two of them resume making out. Jungwoo’s mouth skates to the side and Lucas groans, dropping his hands to your hair, pressing you to take more of his length until you’re just consumed by his scent, the spice and warmth that you’ve come to associate with Lucas. 

Jungwoo tuts, a noise of displeasure as he pulls Lucas’s hand away from your hair. You back off, breathing in deeply, rub your cheek against Jungwoo’s thigh. 

“Don’t touch, pup.” He holds Lucas’s wrists in his hand. Though you see Lucas struggling against his grip he doesn’t seem to be able to break his hold. “Lay back, Lucas.”

He does as Jungwoo commands, sinking back across the bed, never letting his gaze waver from you in Jungwoo’s lap or the beautiful man himself, the whole reason that you’ve both found yourselves here in this situation. 

Jungwoo’s hands move to your tits, pushing them together, massaging them. You sigh and lift your chest into the delicate heat of his hands, spreading your legs just a little as the tingling between them reaches a new level. 

“Please,” You whine. “I’ve been thinking about you both all day. Just wanna have you both.”

“And you’ve been so good.” Jungwoo leans over you, presses a kiss to your forehead. “You’re so wet, and you haven’t even touched yourself. Just had the one orgasm. Good girl. You just wanted to make our Xuxi feel good, didn’t you?”

Lucas moans, and when you tear your gaze away from Jungwoo to look at him, you see Lucas stroking his cock. 

“I still just want to make him feel good. Look at him, Jungwoo. How could I not want to make him feel good?” You bite your lip and sit up. Jungwoo lets you move, holding you still against his chest. 

“And what about you, sweetness?” 

Jungwoo’s lips move over your bare shoulder, his tongue swiping lightly, and then you feel the prick of his fangs. 

“This isn’t about me.” You sigh, rolling your head back against his shoulder. Lucas’s venom still trickles through you, and now as Jungwoo latches onto your shoulder, you feel his venom flushing through your veins as well. Your eyes flutter, body warming; you can feel your wetness dripping out of you onto the bedsheets. 

Jungwoo sucks at your shoulder and Lucas’s fingers drift to your ankle, your calf, when he reaches your knee, Jungwoo pulls away from your skin and hisses, his fangs on full display and his eyes burning red. 

Lucas withdraws, but that doesn’t matter because Jungwoo moves out from behind you, lithely pushing over Lucas, his hand on the wolf’s throat. 

“Listen,” Jungwoo hisses. “You’re going to listen to us. She’s mine to touch now. I let you have your turn, but this right now isn’t about her. Not for you anyway.” He reaches down and cups Lucas’s balls in his hand. You shift forward to better see as Lucas whimpers, and that sound shoots straight to your belly. You remember Jungwoo’s words from earlier about getting Lucas to let you call him slut and bite him as you’d once tried to do to Jungwoo. 

Seeing him now, like this beneath Jungwoo, all wide eyed and submissive, you fight the urge to coo at him and baby him. Still all you want is to make him feel good, but if you were to bite him and make him wait to cum….

Jungwoo dips forward and kisses Lucas again. And then you see Jungwoo’s hand on Lucas moving lower, and he presses a single finger inside Lucas’s tight opening. 

“Ah, Jungwoo,” Lucas moans. 

“You like that, pup?” Jungwoo asks, kissing Lucas’s jaw, and then he kisses right against the pulse point under his jaw. “You want to be stuffed full by my cock? God, in my dreams you’re always begging for it.”

“Fuck, yeah.” Lucas rolls his hips up. “Please, Jungwoo. I never thought— I always imagined—“

You slide down the bed, touch your hand to Lucas’s cheek, and turn his face toward you. “Be a good little slut for Jungwoo, Xuxi. Sweet boy, you look so desperate for him already, and he’s only got one finger inside you. Do you want more?”

Lucas nods and whines a little. You look at Jungwoo, and his eyes are aglow with lust, aroused even more as he watches you with Lucas like this. 

Lucas brings your attention back to him when he whispers your name. “Kiss me,” he pleads. 

You can’t deny him a thing. The warm manly smell of him fills your nose, and he tastes so sweet, kissing you with just as much passion and hunger as you pour into it. 

Jungwoo’s hand moves up the back of your thigh, and when you feel him swat lazily against your ass, you moan into the kiss. Lucas groans and growls, breaking the kiss for just a second to swear at Jungwoo. You pull him back in, muffling your own pleased sound as Jungwoo’s fingers dip between your legs. 

“You’re both so wet for me. Lu, dripping against your belly, and taking my fingers so well. And, sunshine, you’re soaked.” He slicks three fingers up between your legs, running them back and forth through your folds, against your clit. “Wish I could fuck you both at the same time.”

You wish he could too. You crave feeling your pussy filled. Lucas’s tongue brought you to a great orgasm, but it’s not as good as coming apart on a big cock. On Jungwoo’s cock. 

“Listen.” Jungwoo says. 

When neither you or Lucas moves to break the kiss, you receive a sharp smack on the bottom. 

“Listen to me and look at me.” Jungwoo commands. As soon as he’s got both of your attentions, he continues, “I’m gonna work Lucas open so I can finally be inside you.” Lucas closes his eyes and hums, rolls his hips down against Jungwoo’s two fingers curled inside him, and then he opens his eyes again. Jungwoo smirks and then looks at you. “And just so you don’t feel left out, I want you to ride him. Give him the best orgasm we can.”

Jungwoo’s hand massages your ass again, and you moan, nod at him. “Yeah, Jungwoo.”

And then his fingers slide right inside your pussy, fingering you exactly the same as he fingers Lucas’s ass. Lucas makes the most beautiful helpless moans, and you watch as his cock jumps and leaks precum onto his abs, working himself down on Jungwoo’s fingers and moans your boyfriend’s name. 

You caress Lucas’s cheek, lean close to kiss him, but then Jungwoo hooks his fingers inside you pressing right against your G-spot and swirling his thumb on your clit. “No, sunshine.”

Your thighs feel absolutely wet, and you clench around his fingers wishing you were fuller. You drop your head to Lucas’s chest, moaning and mouthing at his skin, and when Jungwoo’s shifts the way he’s touching you, you shift with him, throw a leg over Lucas’s waist and settle over him. 

Jungwoo’s fingers leave you, and you press yourself down against Lucas, slide your wetness over his hard length. Your eyes flutter shut, lips brushing his throat as your breath sighs out, and then you feel the familiar cool touch of your boyfriend’s hand on your hip, on your ass. 

“Sweet girl, you’re going to look so pretty with our Lucas inside you.” Jungwoo coos, and Lucas moans, bucking up against you. “And you’re going to cum so much inside her, won’t you. Gonna cum so hard with me inside you, right, Xuxi?”

The sweet sound of his whimpers turns you on even more. 

And then you feel Jungwoo’s hand, slipping down over your wetness, and then Lucas’s tip glides up and down, guided by Jungwoo, before filling you in one smooth stroke. 

“Oh, fuck, Lucas!” You moan, bouncing back to get him as deep as he can go, and even then you’re not surprised to find that there’s still more, which you feel Jungwoo taking care of, his fingers circled around Lucas’s cock, jerking up from his balls to your pussy. This is greater than the first time, hitting in different spots, and you’re so much more turned on this time. 

A growl rumbles in his chest, a possessive sound as he rocks his hips up. “Feels so good. She’s so fucking wet, Jungwoo. So warm and soft, and she smells so good. Can you smell her?”

He touches your hair, lifting a section of it to his nose, inhaling deeply. 

“Yes,” Jungwoo’s voice is soft but so dominant. He leans low, pressing his chest against your back, his nose touches your shoulder and a second later you feel his lips. “She always smells so sweet.” 

You moan, and push yourself up, your hands planted on Lucas’s chest so you can look down at him. He attempts to follow you up, but you put a hand on his throat. 

His eyes flash golden and he grins, tilting his chin up to give you better access to his throat. Your fingers look small against his throat, and though your know your human fingers are frail and powerless against his werewolf strength, you still feel powerful in this position. 

“Sexy,” Jungwoo whispers, smacking a kiss to your shoulder. 

And you feel that. Sexy. Powerful. Desired and loved and adored. In control. 

When you start riding Lucas, slowly movements on his cock, rolling your hips and grinding down on him in teasing circles, his hands fly to your hips and hold on tight enough to bruise. His hands are so large, spanning enough distance that when he spreads out his fingers his thumb easily reaches your clit, rubbing it in time with your rolling hips, and you feel Jungwoo moving behind you, hear Lucas’s breaths—the sighs, moans, quiet whines and all those beautiful sounds—as Jungwoo continues touching him, getting him nice and ready for Jungwoo to finally fuck him. 

You can’t wait for that bit. Ever since Jungwoo admitted to you the contents of his dream, you’d fantasized about it. The way he had described everything to you was in such vivid detail, and although now isn’t an exact replica of his dream, you’re beginning to notice similarities that Jungwoo has orchestrated. 

When you reach a hand back, your hand finds Jungwoo erect and he hisses, and his mouth lays over your shoulder and his teeth scratch against your skin. He rolls his hips into your touch. 

You wrap your fingers around him, jerk him slowly. His fangs dig in deeper until you feel the sharp searing heat, the burst of pleasure as he breaks skin and his venom floods into your veins. 

You gasp, going still on Lucas’s cock, your fingers around his throat flexing subconsciously. Jungwoo wraps one arm around your waist and then a moment later, the other, holding you tightly as he presses up and drinks. 

And then Lucas breaks your hold on his throat, twists your wrist and his canines dog into your wrist, his tongue lapping sweetly over the wounds, tasting you, feeding you more intoxicatingly euphoric venom. 

Your orgasm is uncontrollable. You feel it as if it is forcibly ripped through you, one second just a relatively near possibility and then suddenly it’s crashing over you, a tidal wave of pleasure rendering you incapable of anything else. 

Moans and cries of their names, of “oh god” and “sweet hell”. You feel as if your vagina is trying to suck Lucas in deeper, clenching and pulsing. 

He sits up and looses his grip on your wrist in favor of nosing in beside Jungwoo. You feel their hair brushing your cheek, jaw, throat. Jungwoo lets out a sound like a growl and then a moan, and then there’s a wet sound and your body is just overwhelmed, vibrating from the pleasure. You’re grateful for Jungwoo’s arms around you, for the two of them squeezing your body between theirs otherwise you would likely collapse. 

You whine, shrug your shoulder, and they both instantly fall away. 

Lucas slumps back down to the bed, his eyes a golden glow and he licks his lips clean. Jungwoo’s arms loosen, fingers trailing down your body as he moves his attention again to Lucas. 

Still fully seated on Lucas’s hard cock, you lay forward, your head on his shoulder. You turn your head, body buzzing and weak and still so enormously turned on. You nip at his throat, place a kiss there and lift your head to kiss his lips again. 

He moans softly, cock twitching inside you, and you think nothing of it really. But when he groans and pulls back with a quiet yelp and a swear paired with Jungwoo’s name, you get an idea of what’s happening. 

“Shh, baby,” You touch his cheek, kiss him softly. “Relax. You’re gonna feel so good.” 

Lucas drops his head back, his eyes already going a little dazed. But when you circle your hips, clench a bit around his cock, he moans for you. 

“Keep doing that, angel.” Jungwoo tells you, his hand laying flat on your tailbone. “He’s relaxing. Still so tight though, Lucas. Relax, pup. Haven’t you done this before?”

“Only a few times. It’s been a while.” Lucas grunts. You kiss him gently, just a peck. “Had to distract myself from you somehow. None of them were like you, though. None as big.”

“That’s what I like to hear.” Jungwoo moans and he pushes the rest of the way in. Lucas’s hips jump, fitting deep inside you again. “Feel so good, Xuxi. Just a bit more…”

Lucas throws his head back and a nervous yet delighted laugh breaks through him. He holds perfectly still other than the laughter, and you know he’s adjusting, and it only takes him a moment or two before he’s breathing normally again, biting his bottom lip and letting a soft moan slip out as he cautiously makes the first move, thrusting up into you, then dropping his hips back onto Jungwoo. 

“Good?” You ask him, stroking his hair. 

Lucas nods. “Good. I’ve done it before but none of them prepped me so good. This is like— oh shit!” He laughs out a moan again, reaching up to cover his mouth. “This is like something entirely new. That right there!” He moans and you feel him leaking precum inside you, a warm presence in your belly. “Oh, fuck, that’s it, Jungwoo!” 

Jungwoo moans too, and it’s then that the rhythm of their thrusts pick up. You don’t move, don’t do anything more than press your lips down against Lucas’s and kiss him while your boyfriend fucks him up into you. 

You swallow all of his moans, suck his tongue into your mouth, and Lucas hungrily chases your lips as you try to pull back for air. 

These two make your breathless—your vampire, your werewolf—and yet you don’t think you can ever have enough of them. If they were to steal the very breath from your lungs, you wouldn’t mind as long as they were there with you. 

Lucas’s cock twitches, blurting precum inside you, making your pussy an absolute mess of your cum and wetness and all. 

And then he starts bucking his hips up recklessly, pushing back to meet Jungwoo’s thrusts. He whines and kisses you so hungrily and deeply, his breath hiccuping when your mouth isn’t on his. 

When you look down at his face, his cheeks are flushed, his pupils are large dark circles lined thinly with gold. He looks so debauched and you love the sight, it brings back that urge from earlier, to tease him and make him crumble, you want him to feel submissive to you. 

“Fuck, baby,” Jungwoo groans, slapping a hand against Lucas’s thigh as he drives his cock in deep, forcing Lucas deep inside you as well. “God, I can feel you getting close. You like this, pup?”

Lucas whines, and you can’t take anymore of it. You want to be the one to make him whine like that, to get him so undone. 

“Are you gonna cum for us, Lucas? God, please I want to feel you cum for me. Cum inside me, baby.” You murmur the words right against his lips, raking a hand through his hair, the other with your fingertips pressing against his throat. You feel him swallow hard, his eyes almost look like they’re rolling with pleasure. And you have an idea of exactly what will take him over the edge. 

You pull forward, keeping only the tip of him inside you, and you feel Jungwoo’s hand moving accordingly, jerking every inch of Lucas that isn’t inside you.

The smacking sound of Jungwoo’s hips against Lucas’s ass, the soft squelching sound of Lucas’s cock moving inside your wetness and Jungwoo moving inside of him, they all fade away as you lean in, your lips beside Lucas’s ear as you moan softly and beg quietly, “Fill me up, Lucas. Breed me.”

The guttural mix of a growl and moan that tears from his lips is unlike anything you’ve heard before. 

Jungwoo’s hand flies over Lucas’s cock, you clench your pussy around his tip, and just like that he lets loose. 

He lets loose a flood of cum, rocking up into your pussy, jets of his warm cum shoot deep inside you. Jungwoo keeps thrusting, keeps touching him, and pours out praises and sounds of his own. And it just keeps coming, hot and thick, and it’s that—Lucas orgasming inside you—that carries you into your own. Lucas growls and keeps fucking into you while throwing himself back onto Jungwoo, pushing more and more of his cum into you until you can’t take it anymore and it’s leaking out of you. 

You hear Jungwoo’s moan as he cums at last, pulling out of Lucas quickly and his cums lays in stripes over your ass and Lucas’s abdomen, joining the mess already there. 

You pull away and flop over onto your back with a whine as both of them turn their eyes on you, ready for more, but you wave your hand at them, at both of their still-erect dicks. 

“Keep going. Have fun. I’m too sensitive and exhausted. I’ll just watch.” You close your eyes, suddenly so heavy you almost open them again. “Enjoy each other like you know you want to.”

They don’t wait for more. 

You hear the crash of their bodies together, mouths and hips colliding, the air in the room feels electric, and they almost sound as if they’re growling at each other as they kiss. Teeth tear at each other, hands scratch over skin, and Jungwoo pushes into Lucas again, wild and powerful now that neither of them are worried about you between them. 

Jungwoo’s hand goes to Lucas’s cock, flying fast and fucking into him just as quick. 

The bed creaks, the headboard cracking against the wall. Lucas grabs Jungwoo by the back of the neck, and pulls him into a deep kiss as he cums apart again, shooting his load all over himself, and Jungwoo keeps going until Lucas is whimpering and twitching, muscles going loose and just truly letting go all over himself. 

Jungwoo collapses forward, his forehead pressed to Lucas’s shoulder with a pleased sigh and a gentle kiss. He whispers something too quiet for you to make out, but Lucas’s fingers twitch at the small of Jungwoo’s back and he makes a happy hum. 

Then Jungwoo’s looking at you, and your boyfriend looks so satisfied, so fucked out. He smiles and then all at once he’s beside you, gathering you into his arms and you feel so small and protected. He traces your cheeks and your nose and then pushes some of your hair back behind your ear.

“Hi, angel. How was that? Good?” He checks with you. 

You nod. “So good. Loved it. I love you.” 

When you feel Lucas shifting around, moving as if to leave the bed, you throw your arm over, slapping him in the chest. He stops moving. 

“Stay.” You tell him. “Where do you think you’re going? Like, just to be clear this wasn’t just another one time thing. I don’t want it to be anyway. You both clearly enjoyed yourselves with each other. I enjoyed myself with both of you. Stay here, Lucas.”

“Was just gonna go clean up.” Lucas grins, gesturing down at his torso covered in all of your combined fluids. “But if you want to come cuddle me while I’m all a mess like this, then by all means…” He opens his arms. 

Jungwoo snorts, tucks his face against your neck and reaches over to push at Lucas. “Go shower, Xuxi. We’ll be here when you get back.” He makes a happy noise when Lucas gets out of bed, his back facing the two of you. “God, I love his ass. I think you should give it a try sometime, sunshine.” He kisses your throat. “It’s so good.”

Your mind sparks at the thought of you taking Lucas apart with just your fingers in his ass, or maybe a strap on to fuck him with. You blush and stroke Jungwoo’s head, trying to push down your already rising arousal. 

For now, you need just a short break. 

The next few days are lost in a blur of sexual haze. You feel like you barely leave the bedroom, constantly tangled with Jungwoo and Lucas. Sometimes you’ll wake with Jungwoo’s head between your thighs, sometimes Lucas will tease you awake with his fingers or his mouth on your breasts. You’ve watched them roll around in bed, fucking and kissing with the sheer brutal strength of their supernatural abilities. You’ve had them both inside you, fucking you full until you’re sore and exhausted. Dozens of different positions, sometimes the three of you or only two or even just one of you touching yourselves while the other two just watch in satiated bliss. 

By the time that you finally break free of the cloud of lust, you stumble into the bathroom while Lucas and Jungwoo stay cuddled together in bed. It’s not the first time you’ve come in here over the past few days, but it is the first time you’re unaccompanied, not distracted by wandering hands that pull you into the shower or onto the edge of the tub. 

So now, without the distraction of the two men, you catch a glimpse of yourself in the mirror. 

You look absolutely fucked. Your hair is a tangled mess, sticking out in odd directions, laying sort of flat in some places. Your eyes shine oddly and a faint headache throbs in the back of your head, beating in time with your heart, worsening when you glance at the bright sunlight coming through the bathroom window. And there are bruises and bite marks littered across your shoulders, throat, chest, and thighs. There’s even dried blood where your neck meets your shoulder. You touch it and find that the skin beneath is tender. Your throat burns and you sit down on the cool tile, close your eyes and try to rid yourself of the sudden nausea. 

Lucas is the one who finds you like that. 

“Are you okay?” He asks quietly, touching a warm hand to your forehead. “Baby?”

“I’m fine. I just got a good look at myself and I think it scared me.” You open your eyes and look up at him crouched beside you. “Is Jungwoo still asleep?” 

He shakes his head. “He says he’s going out to catch us some fresh fish. Maybe some shark.”

You wrinkle your nose. “I’m not so sure about that.” 

Lucas grins and laughs, reaches out to tuck some of your hair back into place. “Well we need to eat. You more than most. I’m sure we’ve taken it all out of you, that’s probably why you’re sitting here feeling unwell. You’ve barely eaten over the last few days.”

As if in reply, your stomach gargles hungrily. 

“Come on. Upsy daisy.” Lucas helps you to your feet, and he goes to shower while you use the toilet and brush your teeth. By the time the pair of you emerge out onto the beach, Jungwoo’s walking back up the sand toward the house, dragging a small shark behind him. 

“Good morning.” He calls out to you both. “I caught breakfast.” 

You wished he was joking. 

The boys start a fire, Lucas preps the shark and cooks it over the fire, and Jungwoo then watches while the pair of you eat. You’re not out there for long before you drag yourself back inside, tired and hot and still feeling a bit unwell. 

“Are you sure you’re alright?” Jungwoo asks a few hours later, crawling into the nest you’ve made on the sofa. His cool hands feel glorious on your skin. “If you’re sick, we should leave, get you home. Neither Xuxi or I has any medical expertise.” 

You’re reluctant to agree with him. You don’t want to leave. This island is paradise, it is heaven. The perfect place for you to be at liberty to enjoy your two monsters, to be ravished and ravaged by them day or night without fear of being walked in on or judged by the rest of the coven and the pack. 

In the end, it’s not your decision. 

“Come on, angel.” Jungwoo speaks softly, and by the time you’re actually awake, he’s already got you lifted in his arms, his cheek against your forehead. You’re halfway down the beach, halfway to the boat where Lucas is already waiting, all of your luggage safely stowed inside. 

“No,” you complain half-heartedly. “I’m fine. We don’t have to leave yet.” 

But neither of them listen to you, and you understand because a moment after Lucas drives the boat away from the shore, you slip back asleep again. 

You wake periodically. When the boat arrives at the dock of the small island where you had all set out from. You wake when Jungwoo passes you over to Lucas to hold in the back of the tiny shaky plane. They wake you to eat and drink something, keep you awake until you’re on the next plane and then for the next flight. 

Each time you wake you’re cradled by one of them, and once when you open your eyes it’s night time and you’re on a larger plane, probably flying back home at last. All of the other passengers appear to be asleep, and you can hear Lucas’s heartbeat under your ear, feel Jungwoo’s fingers twisted with yours, and they’re having a quiet conversation over you. 

“I’m worried.” Jungwoo’s saying, stroking the back of your hand. “Why is she still sleeping? Did we do something wrong?”

“No, nothing. It’s probably just a cold or something. We’ll figure it out. Don’t worry, Jungwoo.” 

You drift off again only to be shaken awake to get off the plane, and as soon as you’re walking through the airport you start to feel yourself coming back, being more aware of everything than you’ve been since you woke up the previous morning now. Everything is so loud, and you start noticing all the people, some of them looking at you quite strangely. 

Your head still aches and your mouth is dry. You pray you’ve not somehow contracted some strange disease from that island.  

“We’ll get you home to Doyoung.” Jungwoo tells you. “He’ll know what to do.”

“Can we get something to eat? I’m starving.” You yawn, eyeing the food options as you pass through the airport. 

Jungwoo runs a worried hand over your cheek. “Of course, sunshine. What are you hungry for?” 

You squint at the places, reading menus and choices, but nothing seems appealing. “I’m not sure.” But there’s something that smells delicious and you look around for it, lifting your nose to inhale deeper. It smells sugary and nutty and your mouth waters. “This way.”

Lucas and Jungwoo follow as you start leading the way, following the delicious smell. Even when you notice that there are less of the shops over here, you follow the smell until you come to stand near an area where a woman stands alone in the doorway of a bathroom, digging through her purse with one hand. 

“Baby, there’s nothing over here—“ Lucas says. 

“Oh, shit.” Jungwoo swears. 

At the same moment all three of you make the same realizations. 

First, there are no more of the food stands in this area. And second, that woman is bleeding from a gash on her arm. 

Jungwoo grabs at you, his hands not quite quick enough as you lunge, unable to hold yourself back at the sight and smell before you: sweet and nutty and warm, fresh blood. 

You remember a time shortly after Jungwoo finally told you his story. A lazy afternoon at the coven’s house when you’d laid out in the sunlight on Jungwoo’s bedroom floor while he hid in the bed and watched you sun yourself like a cat. 

He couldn’t take his eyes off of you, all of your bare skin exposed to the sunlight, dressed only in a bra and panties. And slowly, as the sun creeps across his bedroom, the shadows slinking closer and closer to your spot on the floor, Jungwoo moves as well. Soon he’s on the edge of the bed, then on the floor, inching forward as the light moves. 

Soon he’s laying on the floor too, separated from you by only a few inches of sunlight, and he’s facing you, his deep eyes gazing right into yours. After a few minutes of this, Jungwoo breaks the silence to ask, “What are you thinking about?”

You don’t answer at first, holding that silence there as a safety cushion between your whirlwind of emotions and reality. But Jungwoo looks so curious, and his gaze draws the words right out of you. 

“I don’t want to be just another name for you.” You turn your gaze up to the ceiling. 

You feel Jungwoo’s fingers skating close to you, not touching you just yet, still held back by the sunlight. “What do you mean by that, angel?”

��You have a long past, Jungwoo.” You close your eyes, feel the gentle heat of the sun’s fading light. “Many, many names of people you’ve been with, people you’ve loved. I don’t want to someday just be another one of those.” You want to be his forever, but somehow you can’t make yourself say that. 

His fingers close coolly around your wrist, and he tugs. Your body slides easily across the floor, brought in against Jungwoo’s chest and he wraps his arms around you in a hug. 

“I love you. I genuinely love you the most of anyone that I have ever loved.” Jungwoo tells you. “The first moment I saw you, it was like I knew that I loved you, that I will love you entirely forever. Always.”

And though you always try to forget about it, to not think about Jungwoo’s life continuing for long after your own, right now the thought plagues you. “We don’t have always, though.”

Jungwoo holds you closer, absorbing the sun-heat of your skin into his own, and he stays quiet. What words could he possibly say then? Did you expect him to offer you eternal life, a bite that would make you like him? Is that even something that you would want—trading eternal life for blood-drinking and never again feeling the sun on your skin, never again being free as you are now? Or did you expect him to placate you with sweet words about you being his forever, never loving another after you? 

“You smell so warm.” Jungwoo’s voice is scarcely more than a whisper. “Feel so soft. If I could have you like this forever, my angel, I would be the happiest monster to exist.”

But forever cannot be like this: a human and a vampire. Only a human and a vampire, then a ghost or a memory and the vampire who once held you. 

From that moment on, in the back of your mind, you hold that wonder, that possibility or dream or hope that maybe someday Jungwoo would give you that bite to make a promise of forever come true. 

When you wake hours or days later, your entire body aches. You feel as if your bones are bruised, your skin feels sensitive even though you’ve not even moved, and even when you just hear a quiet noise nearby you want to roll over and muffle your head under a pillow except the thought of actually moving to do so has your muscles throbbing. Even through your eyelids, you can tell the world is bright, glowing reddish but you are so reluctant to lift your heavy eyelids. 

When you actually open your eyes, you’re surprised to see Ten sitting there in front of you. His eyes are closed and he’s holding your hand. 

At first you think he’s asleep, but then you realize that his mouth is moving almost imperceptibly, chanting words under his breath. Your vision shimmers, barely-there golden lines zig zag and cross in beautiful whorls and patterns over your skin. He’s casting some kind of spell. 

You soon notice Jisung and YangYang, the other two witches are sitting behind Ten, their brows drawn together in equal concentration. 

“What’s going on?” You ask, and your voice comes out in a horrible rasp. “What happened?”

The door bangs open, and you turn to look, expecting Jungwoo. Your whole body flares with pain, and all you have time to see is a mass of dark brown hair, and then Lucas is over top of you, his face buried against your neck, his hands cradling your head. 

He’s so warm, wrapping you in his body heat and that comfortable smell of ginger and cinnamon and now something citrusy as well. Despite the aches of your body, the protests of your muscles, you press into Lucas’s welcoming touch, your cheek against his hair. 

“Xuxi,” you sigh, “What’s happened? Where’s Jungwoo?”

Distantly, you notice Ten letting go of your hand. Lucas goes still and sits up a bit so he can meet your eyes. 

“Do you really not remember?” 

“What?” You frown. Last thing you clearly remember was being on the airplane, getting off the plane was a bit fuzzy and most after that was just gone. “Tell me. Someone tell me?” You look over at the trio of witches. Jisung and YangYang avoid eye contact, looking everywhere and anywhere else. 

Lucas’s fingers tenderly brush your throat. “We were a bit careless on the island, you know? Sometimes we let our instincts get the better of us.” 

You feel his touch lightly trace down over your shoulder where he bit you deepest. You can still feel the slight scar tissue indentations from his teeth, but they’re healing. 

“We perhaps bit you too much.” Lucas says. “And when you weren’t feeling well that last day, I think Jungwoo was just really worried about you, he wasn’t cautious or thinking much at all about how much of his venom was in your veins, nor the effect that it would have on you. Do you really not remember what happened in the airport when we landed back here?”

You reach up, grabbing at his wrist until Lucas pulls his hand away. “Where is Jungwoo? Stop avoiding the answers I’m asking for, and just tell me. What happened?”

“Jungwoo’s okay, don’t worry about that.” Lucas soothes you, stroking your hair placatingly. “He’s just hiding in the library because he’s worried and blaming himself.”

“Blaming himself for what?”

“You need to relax. Take it easy.” Ten waves his hands at you. Behind him YangYang and Jisung leave the room. “Lucas, stop being an ass. I’ll tell her.”

You level your gaze on Ten. 

“You had so much vampire venom in your veins it’s a wonder you didn’t just spontaneously turn into a vampire.” He says. “You had a fair amount of werewolf venom too, and you’re lucky you’ve still got another three days until the full moon otherwise you’d be feeling a bit more, uh, canine-ish right about now. But judging by what they told us when they dragged you into the house, you only attacked once there was fresh blood in the open air around you.”

Suddenly you’re all too aware of how sensitive you are right now, how thirsty, how good Lucas smells to you, almost better than normal. 

Your voice seems to abandon you as you rasp out, “Am I a vampire now?”

Both Ten and Lucas look at each other and then back at you. A knot of tension grows in your belly. In these few moments of silence your mind divides itself, exploring two different paths. One, you as a vampire, living your eternal life with Jungwoo and even with Lucas, bound to the night. Or two, a life where you’re still human, where you can live in the day time and see all the sunrises and sunsets, where you can enjoy simple pleasures like seeing yourself in the mirror or eating and drinking, feeling a cool breeze, or the heat of a blush spreading through you as your lover touches you. 

In that moment, you’re not sure what you would like the answer to be. 

“Well?” You prompt them both. 

The bedroom door opens before they answer, and there stands Jungwoo. His expressions reads like a kicked puppy. Doyoung stands behind them, his face serious and revealing nothing, and he gently pushes Jungwoo through the door. Before the door closes behind him, Ten slips out as quick as he can, leaving with Doyoung so you can be alone with Jungwoo and Lucas again. 

“Jungwoo!” You sigh, reaching for him, your heart aching to hold him close. 

He falls into your arms, pushing you flat into the bed, his face tucked into the crook of your neck. He breathes in deeply. 

“You’re not a vampire, angel. Fuck, I wouldn’t know what to do with myself if you were, if it was my fault that you became a monster like me.” His words are muffled, cool against your skin. “Unforgivable.”

You bury your face against his shoulder as well, wrapping your limbs all around him. “I would forgive you, Jungwoo. I would even thank you.”

“Don’t say that.” He whines, and he pulls his face away, rolling over onto his back to stare up at the ceiling. “Shit, it’s all my fault. All of this. Every part of this was foolish, reckless, entirely careless with your humanity.”

Lucas sits there watching the pair of you, his attention more set on Jungwoo now. 

You sit up, and the world wavers just a little bit, but you steady yourself with a hand on Jungwoo’s unmoving chest. 

He stares up at you, eyes perfectly black. “What?”

“Jungwoo, you fool.” You tap your fingers over his unbeating heart. “How many times have I got to tell you, you’re not a monster. Lucas would agree with me I’m sure. You’re sweet and tender, radiant and kind. You are not a monster, and if I could be anything like you I would be grateful. If I could be a vampire as well, spend eternal life with you even if it means drinking Lucas’s blood every day and sitting inside from sun up until sun down, only having the stars and moon without the sun. Jungwoo, you would be my Sun in this dark, dark world.” You put your hands to his cheeks, and tell him, “I want forever with you, no matter the cost. Turn me, let me be like you.”

He whines, twisting his face away. You feel Lucas’s broad warm hands on your hips, pulling you back a bit, lifting you from Jungwoo’s lap and back into his own. Jungwoo covers his face with his arms, mumbling denials and something about curses and Twilight.

Lucas presses his lips against the side of your head. “You should have seen how panicked he was at the airport. We caught you before you could reach that woman. If you’d even so much as taken a drop of her blood, there would have been no turning back. We’re actually really lucky that drinking werewolf blood won’t turn you into a vampire, now that I think about it. And then you were clawing, scratching, trying to bite at us. Jungwoo calmed you down by using some vampire charming thingy he does. But then he panicked while I helped you out to the car, and as soon as we were back here he shouted at everyone, made them all come help. The witches have been here at your bedside ever since, casting spells to purge your system of all the venoms. Sorry about that.” 

His lips are hot against your shoulder, and your skin is so sensitive that it almost tickles. 

“You don’t need to apologize. Neither of you do. I’ve been around all of you for long enough that the idea of being a vampire or a werewolf or any of that stuff doesn’t bother me or freak me out. All of you manage just fine, you’ve shown me that not all of the monsters are monstrous. Even being a witch seems amazing, like from what I’ve seen, the intricacies of the spells is fascinating, and the little visible traces of spellwork really show how talented Ten is.”

Jungwoo sits up, cocks his head slightly to the side, and just stares at you. 

You sigh. “Jungwoo, I’m sorry, but I think you need to accept by now that I have kind of completely surrounded myself in this supernatural community, and wanting to be a part of it myself is not abnormal. It’s probably super normal especially considering the relationship I’ve found myself in with two members of the community.”

Lucas, oddly at that moment, sniffs your shoulder. You flinch. 

“What are you doing?” You try to twist around.

“Sunshine,” Jungwoo holds up his hand, his ring on his finger right before your eyes. “What does my ring look like to you, in detail.”

You frown at him. “That’s a stupid question and completely off topic, too. We’re talking about you turning me into a vampire.”

“Answer him.” Lucas’s voice drops low, rumbling through his chest against your back. 

“It’s black.” You shrug. “A black ring. Why?”

Jungwoo ever so slightly relaxes, and Lucas releases his hold on your hips that you hadn’t realized was so tight before. Both of their reactions are suspicious, and neither of them answer you, so you continue. 

“And, like, it’s got all those fine little silver lines on it.” You reach out quickly to grab Jungwoo’s hand, holding his ring up so it catches the light. “I guess those are like the physical manifestation of Ten’s spell, right? Because it looks really complicated, not as easy to look at as the bracelet’s you wolves wear.” You tap at Lucas’s wrist with your other hand, the finely wrought bracelet that matches the one Jaehyun and the others wear. “Or those sigils he’s drawn on the windows and doorways. And all of those are definitely neater than YangYang’s messy scrawl.”

Lucas’s hands on you suddenly move you off, flipping you over so you’re on your back again, both of the boys looking down at you. 

“What was that for?” You groan, trying to quell the nausea suddenly blooming in your belly at that sudden motion. You squeeze your eyes shut until you feel Jungwoo’s hand on your cheek, his fingertips ranging up into your hair, fine points of coolness against your temple. 

It’s Lucas who answers, his voice low and gentle, drawing your attention to his face as he says, “Are you a witch?”

“What?” You sit up so quickly that your vision flickers and you almost crack your forehead against Lucas’s. “No, I’m not a witch. Don’t you think I would know? That I would’ve said something before now?” 

Jungwoo takes your hand then and lifts it to his lips, the tip of his nose against the back of your hand, and he breathes in deeply. 

“I’m not a witch. Don’t be silly.” You pull your hand away.

“No,” Lucas laughs humorlessly. “You just see the marks left behind by magic spells. Not witchy at all.”

Jungwoo shakes his head, and then he lifts a hand to cradle your cheek, tuck a few strands of hair back from your face. “I knew there was something that drew us together that night.”

You shake your head in denial. “I’m not a witch. I would know. Ten’s told me before that witches would have manifested their powers by now. Maybe I’m just, like, I don’t know, sensitive to magic or something like that. And stop sniffing me!” You shrug away from Jungwoo and Licas, trying to slide off the bed, but as soon as you stand up the world wavers with big black spots across your vision. 

“Woah, careful, babe.” Lucas’s arms wrap around you, drawing you back into bed. “Just lay here, okay?” 

Jungwoo shifts around and you make yourself comfortable against him. 

Lucas doesn’t join you, he just looks down at the pair of you, and when he turns to leave you whine loudly. “Don’t go! You’re not leaving me—not leaving us, Lucas. You’re part of this now, if that trip taught me anything it’s that I definitely want you both. So come cuddle.”

A happy, dopey grin tilts his lips. “Okay.”

“Ah, Wait.” Jungwoo holds up a finger. “Can you close the curtains first? And let’s watch a movie.” He touches your hair, petting it back from your face, and he asks, “What do you want to watch?”

You think for a moment, then you smile and look between the two of your boys. “Have either of you seen all of the Twilight movies?”

Jungwoo groans, cursing the series under his breath, but Lucas barks out a laugh and hops into motion.

After missing out on two weeks of classes, your return to campus is odd and full of excuses. You lie to all of your professors that you were actually in the hospital with an illness (featuring a manufactured Doctor’s note signed by Taeil who apparently at some point in his long life got his doctorate and is technically a certified physician), and you lie to all of your classmates and acquaintances in the same way.

It’s actually your roommates that are truly the issue.

When you walk in the door of your apartment, shivering and just craving a nice warm shower, you find both of the girls curled together under a blanket on the sofa eating ramen as they watch some reality show. 

“Oh, look. She does still live here.” One of them says.

“Of course I do.” You kick your shoes off beside the door. “I told you I was going on a trip. We were gone for a bit longer than I expected.”

Both of them exchange a look. You spot a set of eyes rolling, and then the petulant, “Sure because you were around so much before you left on this trip? You’ve barely been around since November. It’s like you’re paying for a storage facility, not a place to stay. Why do you even still live here?”

Her words, although true, are like a punch to the gut. Both of your roommates stare at you with barely concealed dislike, and you’re not sure when their moods suddenly turned. You used to be such good friends with both of them, but now it seems that they’ve created a closer bond than you realized and now you’re shut out.

You turn to your room without another word, shutting the door perhaps a bit harder than necessary.

They have a point. You don’t really live here anymore. All your time is spent with Jungwoo and Lucas, you’ve spent most nights at the coven’s house, only coming home to change clothes or get a few hours away to concentrate on schoolwork. 

You dump your books onto your bed, emptying out the bag you carry at school, and instead you stuff a few outfits, phone charger, your laptop, the necessary things, and then you leave without another word to your roommates.

By the time the bus drops you off in front of the house, the cold wind whips through the street, strengthening as a late winter storm blows in, already spitting tiny flecks of ice.  The house is quiet as you step inside. The rooms are all dark, and you spot Doyoung’s coffin in the middle of the living room, the lid closed to show that he is actually napping right now. You climb the stairs, pass the quiet doorways of the other vampires, nearly jump out of your skin when you realize that Xiaojun is quietly hanging from a curtain rod over the window at the end of the hallway, nearly blending in with the curtains. He lifts a finger to his lips, but other than that remains completely still.

You keep walking, and at Jungwoo’s door, you pause. Inside you hear a rustle of movement, and there’s something else that makes you hesitate. 

Maybe it’s the echo of your roommate’s voice asking you why you even live there, the tone of her voice making you feel so unwelcome in a place that up until a few months ago you had really and truly considered a home. But then you’d met Jungwoo, and it’s only now as you stand outside his doorway that the thought plagues you: what if he doesn’t want you there either.

An odd sound and sense of movement behind you startles you out of your thoughts. The floor creaking as if there are quick footsteps rushing down the hallway, an eerie giggling. You push through Jungwoo’s door without a second thought, just wanting to put something between you and whoever is playing in the halls.

“Oh, sorry.” You freeze at the sight before you.

Lucas is there.

Jungwoo is halfway on top of him, a leg slotted between Lucas’s thighs, their busy lips pressed together, and Lucas’s hand twisted in Jungwoo’s shirt. They break apart when you speak, though Lucas looks dazed and immediately moves forward again, trying to entice Jungwoo’s mouth back onto his.

“Don’t be sorry.” Jungwoo says, struggling to sit up a bit, and struggling even more to hide his fangs with his lips. “Xuxi, stop for a second.”

He presses Lucas flat with a palm against his chest, and Lucas whines and lifts his hips up against Jungwoo’s leg. 

“Angel, everything okay?” Jungwoo reaches his other hand out to you. “You look sad.” 

You don’t take his hand, instead you walk around to the other side of his bed and just crawl in, curl up on your side, and drag the blankets up to your chin. Both of the boys look at you, but you just shake your head. “It’s nothing. You can continue, I just wanna take a nap.”

Lucas snorts. “You want me to unleash my horniness with you taking a nap beside us? Come on, just tell us what’s wrong. Jungwoo’s right. You’re clearly upset.”

You sigh heavily into the blanket and close your eyes. You feel the heat of Lucas’s skin just a moment before he actually touches you, his hand covering yours on the blanket. And then you feel Jungwoo moving lightly, his body slinking over yours until he fits himself behind you, wrapping you safely in his arms. He whispers, “What’s the matter, sunshine?”

So you tell him. You tell him about the things your roommates said. You tell him about your feelings that you experienced standing right outside this door. You spill a lot of pent up things that you hadn’t known that you were really feeling until they all come pouring out.

And as soon as you’re done speaking, Jungwoo’s arms squeeze you slightly around the waist and he says, “Move in with me.”

“What?”

“Yeah,” Jungwoo touches his lips to your cheek. “Move in here with me. It’s honestly kind of silly that I haven’t suggested it before, but I thought you were still happy with your living situation, but if you’re not, then you should move in here. I mean, you’re here anyways, and when you’re not I wish you were.” 

Lucas knots his fingers with yours. “If it weren’t so dangerous, I would say you could move in at the den.”

“Oh, right, because moving into a house full of vampires is such a safer idea.” You laugh. “Jungwoo, do you mean it? Do you want me to really move in here?”

“I always want you here. I have plenty of room, and I am in love with you, silly. Why wouldn’t I really want you to move in? I’d invite Lucas to move in too if I thought that he would say yes.” 

Lucas’s hand slides from yours, moving behind you to touch Jungwoo. “Yeah, I love you lots, but I still want some sense of independence from both of you.” When you look over into his eyes, Lucas’s gaze is deep and penetrating, and he tells you, “I love you. I don’t actually know if I have said those words to you like this, but I want you to know that I am in love with you. With both of you.”

“Aww,” Jungwoo coos. “I love you two too.” 

He rolls over, reaching to drag Lucas closer, crushing you between them. You whine and laugh and try and squirm your way free, and when you do both of your boys smile at you, all three of you doped up on love.

When you try to actually break away from them, Lucas wraps his arm around your waist, trying to rope you back in between them. You squirm some more and whine, and it’s only when you tell them that you just want to go take a bath that he finally lets you go.

“Go back to doing what you were doing.” You slip over Lucas’s body, head for the bathroom door. “I’ll be in here if you need anything.”

“Mm, I think we’ll be fine,” Lucas tells you, already drawing Jungwoo back over top of him.

Before you’ve closed the bathroom door behind you, you see their mouths collide again. Some part of you wishes you would’ve stayed to watch, but you know they need their privacy too sometimes. So you draw a nice steamy bath, and sink into the water knowing that someday very soon, you’ll be here with Jungwoo forever.

Moving out from your apartment took probably ten minutes. Your roommates were mildly startled when you opened the door to allow in an entourage of good-looking strong guys. Jungwoo, Lucas, Jaehyun, Taeyong, and Johnny were all there to help you move out.

You’d been packing for a few days, fitting all of your belongings into boxes, finding people to take the furniture you no longer needed since your boyfriend’s place came full furnished already. There wasn’t too much you really needed moved, but Jungwoo insisted that the quicker it was done, the better. Thus, the whole team of them assembled to make carrying your boxes and your bookshelf and things much faster.

It was fortunate your lease was up at the end of the month anyway. And as you found out when you told them that you would be leaving, it was even more fortunate considering they weren’t planning to stay either because they were hoping to move into a smaller place. Because they were dating (and you really weren’t sure when that development had occurred. Had you really been so blind to their lives?). So they wanted a one bedroom.

It all worked out.

Moving in took a little bit longer because your bookshelf didn’t want to fit up the staircase and the young vampires tried to help carry in boxes, but one of them busted open across the front lawn and you had to chase down the scattered clothes in the dark. 

By the time it was all said and done, all the boxes and furniture you were keeping was stacked in Jungwoo’s room to be dealt with at a later time, you were hungry and the wolves were hungry, and the vampires all agreed that it was a good night to go out.

The Leaky Cauldron looked nearly the same as the last time you’d seen it. The only difference was the lack of a werewolf presence other than those wolves that had come with you. It seemed a more peaceable atmosphere, but nevertheless you clutched Jungwoo’s hand tightly as you walked inside, flashes of what had happened the last time you were here refused to leave your mind. 

“Relax,” Jungwoo murmurs to you, wrapping his arm around your shoulders as you slide into your seat. “We’re safe here. There’s no one left that wishes us any harm.”

Lucas is on Jungwoo’s other side, and he nods as he hears what Jungwoo says. “And if anyone tries to pick a fight with either of you, I’d like to see them get through me.”

Jungwoo snorts a laugh and shoves at Lucas’s shoulder. “You’re ridiculous.”

They push back and forth a few times until Doyoung glares at them. Everyone places their orders: the vampires order pints of blood to taste, the wolves order their meat cooked rare, and you choose something to drink and something to eat that doesn’t seem so supernaturally-based.

Taeyong and Jaehyun sit across from you, and Jaehyun has his head resting on Taeyong’s shoulder, a wistful look in his eyes. That look reminds you of his story, the one he’d told you on the bus that day you’d decided to go away with Jungwoo and Lucas. It’s the look of a man absolutely smitten. A man who is so in love that he can think of nowhere better than being right there.

You watch them for a while, lost in the cuteness of the way they are with each other, the absolute comfort of the way they fit together. You wonder if you look like that with Jungwoo, with Lucas, all three of you together. You look at them, completely distracted from everything else in wonder of how their future is unlimited. Neither of them will age or wither. They’re both immortal as long as Jaehyun chooses to continue this way. They have absolutely forever.

And you want that.

You want so badly to be someone’s always.

Spring comes and goes. You get used to the pack and the coven changing around you. Sometimes they’re all there, sometimes a few of them will leave for weeks at a time to adventures around the planet. There are an odd few weeks toward the end of the spring semester when the whole coven clears out for a bit, leaving only Ten, Jaehyun, and Lucas behind to keep you any company.

Even Jungwoo leaves.

“They’ll be back.” Lucas tells you, wrapping you up in his arms, stroking his fingers down the length of your spine. You shiver closer to him. “They’ve done this before. It’s a vampire thing.”

You’re glad for his company, keeping you less than lonely in the sheets. You end up sleeping over at the pack’s den several nights. The coven’s mansion is too cold and dark and scary without the vampires occupying all of its silent rooms. The den is completely different: loud, bright, filled with laughter and the warm smells of food and alcohol.

Kun and Jaehyun cook while Lucas and the pups entertain you with games and stories. Mark and Jaemin are always eager to show off their songs they produce in their bedroom studio. Kun even tries to impress you with magic tricks.

And while it is great fun to be entertained by the werewolves who you definitely don’t spend as much time with as the vampires, your favorite entertainment comes in the form of Lucas. Late at night, his bedroom door shut soundly and the night view from his windows lays the city bare as he takes you apart on his fingers, his tongue, fucking you into a moaning mess.

Lucas is insatiable. You’re sure that if he actually fucked you to the point that you passed out from the pleasure, he would keep going. And this night is no different. He’s given you three orgasms already, with short breaks in between for you to suck his cock, but now he’s got you on your hands and knees, looking out at the city lights while he kneels behind you. 

“So pretty.” Lucas trails his fingers between your legs, his fingertips gathering up your wetness. You shiver, needing him to just fill you up, give you that fourth orgasm, fill you up with his cum as well. “And you smell so good, baby.”

“Shut up.” You push back, but Lucas pulls his hand away. “Lucas, fuck, please. I know Jungwoo likes this teasing shit, but not me. Not now. I just wanna feel--”

He pushes forward, impaling you with his cock. Your words cut off with a loud moan, and Lucas curls his hand over your mouth, his fingers muffling your sounds as he pushes two of them into your mouth, hooking them against your cheek as he fills your pussy from behind. “Are you going to be loud for me? I love when you moan like this, so rarely do you do it when it’s just one of us.”

Lucas draws back and then snaps his hips forward, pulling his fingers from your mouth to smear the spit over your lips and cheek. 

“Fuck,” You moan. “I like it when you’re rougher. Usually you and Jungwoo are only really rough when you’re together for me.”

“Thought you liked me sorta submissive?” He strokes your hair back and leans forward to kiss at your neck. “Thought you liked me best when I’m doing what you and Woo tell me?” 

“I like you any way I can have you.” You grunt, sinking back into one of Lucas’s thrusts. “I want you any way for forever. We’ve got it good like this. You, me, Jungwoo.”

Lucas wraps his arms around your upper arms, tugs you up so you’re kneeling with your back against his chest. One hand slides around to grasp at one of your tits and he thrusts rapidly into you, snapping his hips forward, pulling you down onto him until you feel so incredibly full, like his cock is pushing into your guts, pulsing inside you.

“Sweet-smelling angel,” Lucas touches his lips to your ear, and you shiver in his arms, squealing in delight when his fingers drift lower to touch your clit. “Love the way you feel around me. I just wish Jungwoo could be here too, to see how good I’m making you feel. He’d reward me so good, wouldn’t he?”

You grind down on his cock, moaning for him. “He’d fuck you like you’re fucking me, bite you until you’re blissed out, and jerk you off until you’re cumming for him. God, Xuxi, I want you to cum. Love it when you cum in me.”

His hands go tight on you, touching you intensely, pulling that last orgasm from you like he’s taking it right from your soul. 

Lucas swears, buries his face against your shoulder as he pulses inside you, spilling his load, and as his teeth prick against your shoulder, you swear it feels like his cock is swelling and filling you even more.

You collapse forward with a moan and Lucas follows, laying his hot, damp chest against your back, his cock still firm inside you. His lips and teeth still catch on your skin. Your eyes flutter shut, feeling his venom inside you now.

“Are you trying to turn me, Lucas?” You ask, reaching up to clasp his hand over your chest. “The full moon draws near, I can see it i all of you, the wolf overtaking the man you are.”

“I think Jungwoo would properly murder me if I turned you.” Lucas whispers, his nose drawing a line up your throat. “And I wouldn’t ever dare. I would love eternity with you. Me, you, and Jungwoo for forever sounds ideal. But making you a werewolf for that? Never. This is such a curse, and if I could give it up I would. That reminds me, you should go stay back at the mansion for a few nights, maybe Ten’ll stay with you?”

You squirm to get more comfortable in his arms. “Maybe. Maybe I’d like to see what you’re like as a dog. Bet you’re playful and cuddly. You seem like you’d want to play fetch and hump pillows.”

Lucas nips at your shoulder again. “Hush. Go to sleep. I can feel how sleepy you are.”

You graduate by some miracle at the end of the Spring. The coven returns just in time, and your boyfriends and the wolves and witches stand in the audience and cheer and howl and hoot when your name is called and you walk across the stage for your diploma. 

The summer passes in a haze of work: you receive a promotion at your job, working new long hours that leave you exhausted by the time you leave. The summer also brings a brief break between Ten and Johnny; a misunderstanding led to a horrible argument that woke the whole house in the middle of the day, and Ten refused to speak to Johnny for nearly three weeks (but he complained to you about it nearly every day). They mended things once they spoke, and Ten swore he was never leaving Johnny again. 

Autumn brought with it warm sweaters, hot drinks, and Jungwoo cradling you against his chest while Lucas napped across Jungwoo’s lap, tucked under his arm. Your one year anniversary comes, and the coven and wolves hold a wild party that lasts from dawn on the 31st until dawn on the first of November. You get ragingly drunk and sugar high, and your ridiculous boyfriends roleplay as doctors and you as the patient.

Winter arrives just the same, cold nights wrapped up warmly with your boys. Days bundled up in coats and scarves, grabbing lunch and coffee with Jungwoo, going ice skating with Lucas, Christmas shopping with the both of them.

A year passes quickly, and Christmas is slightly less wonderously momentous. Ten doesn’t perform any fantastic spells to make a vampire capable of walking in daylight. But, halfway through the evening when everyone’s sitting around opening gifts and playing games, a drunken Jaehyun pulls Taeyong down into his lap, takes his face between his hands and asks him, “Won’t you marry me?” And Taeyong surges forward to kiss him enthusiastically as a yes. 

And then, everything is good for a little while until the peacefulness and fun of the year finally winds to a close on New Year’s Eve.

It happens on a night when the rest of the coven is gone. Johnny and Ten keep disappearing off to Ten’s place now that they’re back together, Taeyong and Jaehyun left for a vacation deep into the north where the nights are deep and hunting is fun. The others are out roaming, at the Leaky Cauldron, or over at the pack’s den. And tonight it’s just the three of you on the anniversary of when the three of you started, now cuddled up like this, binge-watching a show while you and Lucas try to explain a few things to Jungwoo who hasn’t ever seen any of the series before.

Jungwoo runs his fingers through your hair while you stroke your thumb along the back of Lucas’s neck. It’s all very comfortable and warm and you lay your head back on Jungwoo’s shoulder, nearly ready to fall asleep.

Lucas hums and reaches up, tapping the back of your hand. “This part. Have you seen this bit? I love it. Woo, watch closely and listen.”

“How am I supposed to listen when you keep talking, pup?” Jungwoo teases. 

“Shh!” Lucas sits up, covering Jungwoo’s mouth with his hand and laughing. You miss whatever’s happening on the screen, too distracted by the way that Jungwoo gazes at Lucas, the way that Lucas slips his hand away to kiss Jungwoo. They kiss hungrily. The relaxed atmosphere of just a moment or two before is consumed by their passion.

You whine and lean up to kiss at Jungwoo’s throat, touch Lucas’s neck with your fingertips. He draws away, his lips on your cheek and throat until you turn your head and your lips meet his. Lucas’s lips are soft and warm, and he melts at your touch. You turn your head, and then you feel Jungwoo’s lips on the other side of your throat, a hint of teeth, the hot swipe of his tongue. 

You could so easily fall into this, just let the lust fill you up, but you want more. You’ve been wanting more for so long, but every time you ask, Jungwoo tells you no. But you want it.

“Can I ask you for something?” You murmur, licking your lips when Lucas pulls back for a moment. 

“Anything.”

“Whatever you want, angel.”

“Turn me, please.” You sigh, twisting your fingers in Jungwoo’s hair, tugging in an attempt to get his mouth to your throat. “Please. I love you. I want to be yours, both of yours, always. Make me like you.”

Jungwoo pulls back, trying to untangle your fingers, but you hold tight.

Lucas touches Jungwoo too, his fingers on your boyfriend’s cheek. “Just do it, Woo. She wants it. She wants us. She knows what she’s asking for.”

A long moment of hesitation as Jungwoo looks down at you, searching your eyes, but you just tilt your head back, exposing your throat to him. “Just a bite, Woo. And any human will do to fill me up on.” He touches your neck, looks back over at Lucas, then back down at you.

“This isn’t a joke. It’s irreversible.”

“I know.” You take hold of his hand. “And I don’t care. I’ll do whatever it takes to be with you forever. If it’s not this, then I’ll ask Lucas to turn me, I’ll go to Ten for a spell, I’ll search to the ends of the Earth for something. Anything.”

“You really think you’re living in that Twilight, don’t you?” Jungwoo asks. “A love triangle with a vampire and a werewolf, the need to become a vampire.” He tuts and shakes his head. “I really hope you don’t grow to hate me for this.”

Lucas sits back, watching as Jungwoo cradles the back of your neck, tilting your head to give him clear access to your throat. You shiver, a natural fear response as you feel his breath, feel the brush of his lips and his teeth, then the fangs. An ever so slight pinch and then sharper and a burn. 

You gasp, your hands flying up to his shoulders.

Lucas takes hold of your hand. 

The pressure at your throat increases, the hands on you are warm and tight. You close your eyes and let yourself sink into the feeling as everything gets fuzzy and hazy, close and muted, until it all just fades away....

It’s all very different when you wake. You feel it instantly.

You can feel the dry burn of your throat. You can hear the wind in the trees outside, cars on the road. Hearts beat nearby and someone moves across sheets. You can hear the young vampires giggling up in the attic, and the creaking of someone shifting down on the first floor. You can tell it’s still night time outside, the sun not yet above the horizon, and the new year has likely only just begun; you can hear hear celebrations, the crackle of fireworks somewhere in the city, and cheers in the houses nearest to the coven’s. 

It worked. You know it did. 

You can still taste the metallic burn of blood on the back of your tongue, tingling with something that you instantly recognize as magic, as Ten. It was his blood that completed your transformation, and you can hear him several rooms away, his heartbeat different from the heavy sounds of the few werewolves in the house. 

And then something shifts, much closer, dragging your attention away from halfway across the house to right here in this bed that is so comfortable and familiar. 

Heat radiates from just beside you, smelling of cinnamon, and without opening your eyes, you know it’s Lucas, looking down on you.

“Lucas.”

And then there are fingers nearing you, you can sense the shifting in the air. A familiar touch, still cool, though significantly less cold than they once were. So tender, loving. You hear the sound of Jungwoo’s shoulder brushing against Lucas’s, both of them leaning close to see you. His fingers trace the curve of your cheek. 

“Jungwoo.” 

You open your eyes to the world and see forever looking back down at you. 

a/n: it’s been one year exactly since I posted part 2 of this so lol I’m sorry, but here it is! The third and final part of this series. It went several different ways than I was originally intending for it to be, but I think I’m pretty happy with this ending. As usual, if you liked it, please let me know, reblog it, like it, message me. 

And happy New Year!

#jungwoo #nct #nct smut #jungwoo smut #luwoo smut

[bug-ocs]

i’d found a relationships ask meme a loooong time ago and i kinda reworked it to be more like an interview-style between danny and eli...so...here’s some really cheesy shit below the cut (AND SORRY IT’S SO DAMN LONG, RIP MOBILE)

Who made the first move and how?

Danny: He slipped me his business card while I was at work. I-it doesn’t sound all that great, but it was really smooth how he handled it, ya know?

Eli: Ah, Dansha. You flatter me. I was so nervous, I was sure you’d notice.

Danny: *laughs* See, that’s why you impress me! I didn’t notice at all! Smooth as always. And after giving me nothing but compliments the whole time? How could I say no…

Who is the most insecure and what makes them feel better?

Eli: *turns to Danny with a gentle smile*

Danny: *sighs and slowly raises his hand* Eli’s really good about getting me out of my funks, though. He always knows how to say just the right thing.

Who is the most romantic?

Danny: *immediately turns to Eli*

Eli: *laughs* Oh, come on, Dansha, give yourself a little more credit! You’ve hand-made pasta for a lavish Italian dinner! You’re romantic in your own way, lapochka.

Who can’t keep their hands to themselves?

Danny: *blushes* I-I dunno why. I’ve always been like that…

Eli: So handsy…It’s very endearing. You wouldn’t expect it from him, but he always has his hands on me!

Who says ‘I love you’ first?

Eli: Ah, that was fun, wasn’t it? I don’t have trouble saying it at all, but Dansha is a little more…reserved, so naturally I said it first.

Danny: *slaps forehead* I can’t believe I didn’t say it back at first…I knew I did, but…

Eli: *pats his shoulder* Ah, it made it all the more special when you finally did, and I knew you meant it with all your heart.

Who would you ask if y’all ever had a threesome?

Danny: *groans*

Eli: *laughs* Well, we—

Danny: We’re not talking about this. Next question.

What do y’all get up to on a night out?

Eli: Ah, we’re both such homebodies…

Danny: Yeah, a “night out” for us is like…getting dinner and then chilling at the bar for a while. Might do some shopping if it’s early in the evening.

Eli: I do enjoy watching you peruse the cooking aisle at Bed Bath and Beyond.

What do y’all like in bed?

Danny: *blushes and stammers* Wh-wh—I-I didn’t know I’d be asked these kinds of questions! I-Isn’t that a bit personal?

Eli: *sighs* I’m pretty vanilla as far as most things go, but Dansha—

Danny: Shut up!

What is the most embarrassing thing y’all have done in front of each other?

*They both groan*

Eli: Well…thankfully I got it out of the way pretty early…I was having a very intense conversation with Danica about my…um…you know, I was sorting through my feelings when we first starting dating and Dansha…he showed up about halfway through and heard a bunch of it…You’re so good at pretending you didn’t hear anything.

Danny: *clears throat* Hear what?

Eli: *smiles gently* Well, Dansha, what about you?

Danny: There’s quite a few that come to mind, but I’m still not over the ramen incident…

What do y’all hide from one another?

Danny: *scowls at Eli*

Eli: *chuckles* Yes, sometimes I hide my favorite snacks in the night stand, but I’m just doing what needs to be done! I can’t have him taking my snacks all the time! He loves his hot chips.

Danny: Then just buy two bags!

Eli: I do and you just eat both of them!

When did y’all realize y’all should get together?

Eli: Immediately. I saw him walk up to my table and I knew he was the one.

Danny: Eli…come on…

Eli: I’m serious! There was an angelic glow around you from the ceiling lights and everything. I don’t think I’d ever fallen that hard before.

Danny: *hiding his flushed face in his hands*

Well, Danny? What about you?

Danny: I, uh—y-y’know, I’m kinda…it takes a little longer for things like that with me a-and while we were definitely dating, I had this awful thought in the back of my head that he was just kidding, a-and I knew! I knew he liked me because he said it and did things that made me believe it! But the first time I really believed it was when I cooked a meal for him. *He blushes and hides his face behind his shoulder* No one had ever been that enthusiastic about my cooking before, and…I dunno, it sounds cheesy but it just felt like a little sign, you know? A little reassurance that we were a good match, I guess.

When one of y’all has a cold, what does the other do?

Eli: It’s pretty obvious, no? Dansha pampers me with all my favorite foods. Hand-cooked by the pro chef himself!

Danny: Ah, Eli knows better than to try to hand-make ramen—which, of course, is the only logical thing to get me when I’m sick—so he always goes out of his way to stop by Aitsumoto, no matter how long the line is… It’s quite sweet…

When y’all watch a film what do you choose and why? Who gets the final vote?

Danny: If it were up to me, we’d be watching cooking shows on YouTube, but we watch those every night anyway… I’m not a big movie buff, so I usually let Eli decide, and we always somehow end up watching cheesy romcoms from the late 2000s.

Eli: It’s when they peaked! You can’t get better than The Proposal!

When y’all fight, how do you make up?

Eli: *waves his hand dismissively* Oh, easily. I just have to bring him ramen.

Danny: He's not wrong…but likewise, I just bake him croissants. They have a tendency to be my pastry of choice for metaphorical olive branches, and he knows how much work goes into them.

Where do y’all go on your first date?

Danny: Ah, we went to Aitsumoto…I’d been hanging out at the bar for a few weeks and finally worked up the nerve to actually ask him to hang out when neither of us were on the clock.

Eli: I thought it was very sweet of him to take me to his favorite restaurant. Food means a lot to him, and I felt like I got to witness something intimate, watching him eat the famed ramen he always talked about.

Danny: *hides his face and groans* God, I’m so used to going by myself. I can’t believe I ate like that in front of you. Especially when we’d just started dating!

Eli: *laughs* I felt like I was intruding!

Danny: It’s a wonder you still wanted to go anywhere in public with me after that.

Eli: *whispers behind his hand* It was actually very cute.

Where does your first kiss happen?

Eli: *dreamily* His apartment…he made such a fantastically romantic meal, all from scratch!

So, you kissed him first, Eli?

Danny: *clears throat* Ah, n-no…that was, uh…that was me…

Eli: *chuckles* Give him a heartfelt compliment, and he’ll do any—

Danny: O-okay, next?

Where do y’all first have sex?

Danny: *groans, head in hands* Please, I didn’t know we’d be talking about—

Eli: My apartment, this time. A little bit more privacy, you know—?

Danny: No more! I’m not talking about this anymore!

Why do y’all fight?

Eli: Usually over stupid miscommunications. I have a tendency to shut down when I’m upset, and Dansha isn’t great at using his words sometimes.

Danny: Yeah…guilty as charged. Usually once the emotion dies down, one of us tries to come at it from a different angle and we both realize we’re being stupid.

Why do y’all need to have a serious chat?

Eli: It’s…usually about Vice stuff. I’ll notice Dansha isn’t acting himself, or I’ll say something that is unintentionally antagonizing.

Danny: We’ve got it down to a science at this point. Gen’s helped us a ton, too. And Eli knows I’m not great at…talking about stuff, so I’m really thankful for his patience.

Eli: *kisses the back of his hand* You’re worth every second, lapochka.

Why do your friends get annoyed with y’all?

Danny: That! What he just did! His cheesy little—augh, God! *groans into his hands*

Eli: *shrugs his shoulders with a smile* I mean every word, but it’s still quite fun to dote on him in front of his friends. They say they can’t stand it, but I know they think it’s cute, too

Why do y’all get jealous?

Eli: Well, I don’t get jealous…*turns to Danny*

Danny: *throws his hands up* He’s a hot bartender! How can I not be jealous when every goddamn customer flirts with him?! God, sometimes I swear he milks it just to see me get riled up!

Eli: *mouths* I do.

Why do y’all fall a little bit more in love?

Eli: It might seem like a cop-out answer at this point, but watching him cook. All the cute little facial expressions he makes to himself when he’s thinking or concentrating. It’s all very endearing. I can taste the love he puts into his dishes, especially when he cooks just for me. I feel like I see a very real part of him not many people get the chance to, and every time I see it, I fall a bit more in love.

Danny: That, what he’s doing now. He’s so open and honest and affectionate, and I’m not used to that. He’s so selfless and has such a giving heart, and…I just feel so lucky I get to be with him. He…makes me want to love myself. He makes me want to be a better person!

Why does it work between y’all?

Danny: He’s willing to put the work in with me. Loving him is easy, but I know I can be—

Eli: I’ve told you a million times, Dansha. Loving you comes naturally to me, and if there’s any effort involved, you’re worth every bit of it.

#danny #eli #for reference this takes place after the story ends and danny/eli get back together

[onestowatch]

Summer Salt Aims to Find the Silver Lining on ‘Sequoia Moon’ [Q&A]

Photo: Andrew Reiner

After two canceled tours, a year-and-a-half of waiting for the world to open back up, and months of releasing a series of summery and strong singles, Summer Salt has finally released their second full-length album, Sequoia Moon. Fans old and new have been waiting patiently for the twelve-track record to inject some tropic vibes into their daily listening diets, and Austin-based duo, comprised of vocalist and guitarist Matthew Terry and drummer Eugene Chung, have certainly delivered the goods just in time.

Ones To Watch had the opportunity to chat with Terry and Chung about the album and to discuss its themes of finding your people and your way back home and what's next for the band.

Ones To Watch: So far, y'all have released a series of really amazing singles leading up to the release of your sophomore album Sequoia Moon. Which one have y'all been most proud of?

Eugene: I think for me, and this might be different from Matt's answer, but I think "Monday's Facil" is my personal favorite just because it was the first one of the bunch. It was the first one we recorded as well when we started working on the record. Also, we did the video ourselves, and, I don't know, there's something kind of nostalgic about that.

It feels like all of Summer Salt's music videos have a solid identity tied together by the band's easy-going and authentic energy. What is your creative process like when it comes to coming up with visuals for your songs?

Matt: We try to make a little bit of a mood board and exchange ideas with each other. Eugene and I will text a lot of our random thoughts that we have that we think will be cool for certain videos and try to recreate what we feel like we see when we think about our videos. "Monday's Facil" is the only one we've directed ourselves.

Eugene: Yeah, sometimes we'll always bring up ideas, and we love everything we have, but sometimes our original ideas don't get shown or don't come across the way that we intended, which is totally fine because I think there's magic in that.

Matt: Yeah, sometimes things take a different direction. I feel like for "Fire Flower," we wanted it to be very story-oriented. We always try to start with a story, but then it just ends up becoming more vibey because the story just gets kinda lost in translation. So in the video for "Fire Flower," we wanted to be like, okay, we're getting ready to go to like a New Year's dance, and we're going to be the band that plays the show at the New Year's dance. And so that's what we wanted to do, and then afterward, we were gonna go shoot off fireworks, but then it kind of became, you know, it took on a life of its own, and we were kind of just having fun. We found that with the videos, because Eugene and I are both a bit camera shy, having a story opens us up more, and we can have more fun with it.

That makes sense! The opportunity to play a character puts less pressure on you in a way.

Matt: Exactly! When you have to do something that's so you, you end up overanalyzing the parts you may be self-conscious about and worry about how you come off on camera. I think that's how a lot of actors are.

A personal favorite music video for the singles y’all have released so far has to be "Hocus Pocus." Where did y'all shoot it and tell me about that day?

Eugene: Yeah, that one has to be my favorites so far too.

Matt: Same here!

Eugene: Yeah, fun location, fun story. We shot most of it around Crescent City, California, in the Redwoods and Jedediah National Forest. It's the same place they shot Star Wars: Return of the Jedi.

It did look extremely familiar now that you mention it!

Matt: Haha yeah, we've been getting that a lot from people. I really loved that video because we got to play these big characters, which is something we hadn't done before in past videos, which is really cool.

From the songs that haven't been released yet on the album, which one are you most excited for people to hear?

Matt: I think people will really like "Neptune," but I'm especially excited for people to hear "Trouble In Paradise."

Eugene: For me, I'd have to say "Lewa Lani."

Sequoia Moon takes the listener on a beautifully vulnerable sonic journey, and it feels like although there's evident influence from your previous work on it, yet the record also feels like it's a chapter full of growth for Summer Salt. How would you describe this "era" for you guys? What does this album mean to you?

Matt: I would say that this era of the band, I think is just more of us being able to be more honest. I think the more and more we've kind of gone from our first releases to just writing, to releasing EPs and then Happy Camper, and then now it's like, it just kind of coincides with just growing and then like being true to ourselves. I feel like when we were writing Happy Camper and Driving To Hawaii, I don't know why, but I've always felt like it was just us wanting to write about fantasy and real-life things were never mentioned, and we kept things kind of playful and light. I think it's just been so much more of an emotional and genuine relief to write very real and honest things. I think that definitely has been where we've been recently in our writing, and I feel like that has progressed in this album.

So it's safe to say that you've learned more about what kind of artists y'all want to evolve into while working on this album?

Matt: Absolutely.

Like many pieces of work that are coming out right now, this album was recorded during the pandemic. What was that experience like for you guys? Did you have to tweak your creative process, or did things end up staying relatively the same?

Eugene: I mean, I think for me, and maybe for Matt too... I mean, we've always worked well together, so that's never been a problem, but just being more open to more ideas or different sounds. Communication goes a long way.

Matt: Yeah, to kind of go back to the last question and to answer this question too, one thing I try to remind myself is, like, when I write a song, and perhaps Eugene, you've had the same experience, and you're inspired by another artist, that you're like, "Well, I want to write a song like that thing. How did they do that? How do they come up with such like a cool transitional hook?" I ask myself all the time how did they come up with something that's so lucid and kind of dreamy, but then also keep it very pop sounding. I wonder about these kinds of aspects of songwriting that are really neat and seem very crafty. However, I learned that when I overthink how to do those things the way they did it, it's almost like I'm trying too much to be perfect, then the song kind of loses the essence and coolness. When you take that thought process away, it just naturally becomes you being you and the song becomes more naturally beautiful that way. It's so hard at times to take yourself out of that when you're stuck on a song because you just want it to be perfect.

Eugene: Yeah. It's hard to replicate stuff, and I think things kind of coming naturally is always the best way for us. I think better songs just happen when you sort of step out of that place. Also, working from a distance virtually was super easy for us because both of us are such homebodies. So it was easy for us to share ideas and come together over the pandemic.

What does the name Sequoia Moon mean to you? 

Matt: I went to the Bay Area for a while, like a long time ago, and then went to the Redwood Forest for the first time, and I just came back and wanted to write some songs about it. Like three of those songs, "Two Of A Kind," "Sequoia Moon," and then "Lewa Lani," other than those three, they're all kind of relatively new, but those three were I wrote from back then. So like I said, one of those songs was called "Sequoia Moon," and I thought that that was a beautiful name. So Eugene and I went on this name quest to try to figure out what to call the record, so we searched through all of our lyrics several times because we just wanted to, for the first time to pick something that wasn't like a track name. So we were trying to find something we did like and finally just accepted defeat and went back to our original idea and just do Sequoia Moon and accept that. We just ended up really liking it and thinking that it was a really pretty name.

Eugene: Personally, the name fit for me not just because of the few songs that Matt wrote before writing the rest of them and being inspired by that area, but I think, for all the songs, there's kind of a deeper meaning between Matt and me and that time in our lives.

Matt: You know, I feel like all of the songs are about finding this kind of duality of sadness and beauty. Life is a rollercoaster of happiness and sadness, and you're just trying to find this silver lining and beauty in all of it. And so I feel like that name just kind of sounds a little lonely. Sounds a little bad or bittersweet, but it also sounds beautiful.

Outside of the natural beauty of the Pacific Northwest, what else inspires you as creators and inspired this body of work?

Eugene: I think relationships both new and old. Growing. 

Matt: Yeah, like thinking about your interpersonal relationship with people and what they mean to you in your life. I think that that's a very inspirational thing. When I was writing some of these lyrics, I was just becoming very close friends with Eugene, and my girlfriend and I just began dating. I started writing these songs three years ago, and so just finding those people that are just the kind of people who can pull you out of any funk that you have or be there for you through your best and worst time, that's an inspiration. I think lots of songs we have, like "Patch Your Jacket," "Clover," "Hocus Pocus," "Two Of A Kind," "Colors Of Your Love," they're all just about people being there for you and saying, "It's cool, dude. I got you."

Now that touring is back up and running, are there some cities that y'all are excited to revisit or visit for the first time this summer when y'all hit the road?

Eugene: Yeah, we're super excited to tour. We have a mini-tour this summer, and then we actually have a longer one starting in September.

Matt: Yeah, I'm excited to play in San Francisco. We've also never been to Miami, so that'll be cool.

Eugene: Yeah, it's weird we've never been there, but it'll be cool.

Matt: Oh, and Santa Fe! It's gorgeous there, and we've never been there. So those three cities for sure!

Sequoia Moon is available everywhere you can stream it. 

#summer salt #album reviews #interview #indie #indie pop