#this is not how i intended to tell this story but you know what

[queenofterrasen418]

Cruel Fates (Part 2)

Pairing: Azriel x f!Reader, little Eris x f!Reader

Summary: Azriel is your mate but only you know it. You are very aware that he has eyes for someone else and thus you decide not to hide it forever. After all, what could go wrong right?

Warnings: Angst (I don't think I can ever stop myself from writing angst.)

Based on this ask.

4.1K words

Previous part

You found yourself aimlessly wandering along the banks of Sidra after storming out on Rhys. The ambient noise enveloped you—the rhythmic splashes of the river against rocks, the bustling chatter of the market, birds chirping in the background. Everything felt mundane, yet strangely comforting. Ignoring your problems wasn’t a solution, as Rhys had pointed out, but it was undeniably easier than facing or even acknowledging them. Nevertheless, you had resigned yourself to the current state of affairs.

Using distraction as your shield, you returned home burdened with bags filled with new books, clothes, and other unnecessary items. As you entered the elegant two-story building you called home, a sense of familiarity and solace washed over you. This palace had become a sanctuary, a reflection of your own essence.

Closing the door behind you with a soft thud, you were greeted by the familiar scent of citrus and jasmine. Setting down the bags, you kicked off your shoes. The silence of the house stood in stark contrast to the lively atmosphere of the market. Just as thoughts of Azriel slipped from your mind, your senses sharpened, recognizing the subtle hum of shadows.

"Ah, the shadow singer. Ever heard of knocking or privacy?" you quipped, though you didn’t need to turn to know it was him.

"I'm a spymaster; it's not in my nature," he replied with his customary soft smile.

Refusing to let your gaze linger on him for too long, you busied yourself by fetching a glass of water.

"How can I assist you, Azriel?" you inquired as you filled the glass in the kitchen beyond the hall where he stood. You still felt a distance from him, not quite comfortable enough to address him as Az like your sisters, Feyre or Elain, did.

"Can't I simply enjoy your company?" he teased, his voice gentle.

Turning away, you closed your eyes for a moment, mentally reminding yourself to compartmentalize. "He's just being polite," you repeated to yourself, trying to drown out the nagging voice in your head that reminded you of Elain's constant talk about him. "He treats Elain the same."

You scoffed, hoping it didn’t come across as too rude. "Yeah, sure. Now, what brings you here?"

"We're expecting Eris to arrive in a few hours, around sunset. Rhys wanted me to ask if you've changed your mind."

Ah, you had forgotten about the impending meeting with the prince. You sighed. "And Rhys couldn’t ask me himself because?" It was a rhetorical question, but Azriel seemed unaware.

"He mentioned that you two had a disagreement, and he wasn’t sure if you'd be open to talking."

"Of course, I'll talk to him. I’m not a child," you replied, your brows furrowing. "And yes, I still intend to attend that meeting."

Azriel nodded, his expression unreadable as always. "Good to know. In that case, he asked me to inform you that you’ll have to deal with this meeting on your own, there are some crises with an Illyrian camp that he had to attend to, and he is running late.”

“Oh,” A part of you was glad that Rhys let you handle this, “It’ll just be me then?”

The spymaster shook his head, “Of course not, I’ll accompany you.”

You nodded as you were unsure of the right response, “Is there anything else I should know before I meet Eris?”

Azriel paused and started slowly, “My shadows tell me he wishes to overthrow his father. But it’s difficult to know what’s the truth.”

“Ahh, that’s why Rhys put me on this.”  you realized as Azriel nodded in response.

You wondered why Rhys requested you accompany him to a meeting with Eris. The powers you got from the cauldron were unique. Your ability ranges from slowing a person's pulse to snatching the air from their lungs as long as the target must be in your line of sight. You can command human organs and regulate emotions by releasing certain chemicals in the body. This allows you to induce suffocation by removing air from someone's lungs, controlling blood flow, causing heart attacks, dictating heart rhythm, and slowing healing. Aside from being extremely valuable in a battle, you can also act as a living lie detector, by monitoring a person’s physiological response.

“Alright, I’ll be there, is there anything else?” 

Azriel looked like he was about to say something before he muttered a no.

“You know better than to lie to me, what is it?”

He signed before he finally asked, “I knew that you and Rhys got close in a short time but I didn’t realise you were close enough that he trusted you to handle a meeting alone. That too with Eris.”

“Honestly, I didn't know either.” you said, “Rhys and I connected so quickly that it felt like I had known him for years, he is the older brother I never had. I am glad that he trusts me to handle this.”

You noticed a strange emotion flash in his eyes for a quick second before he gave a soft smile “I am happy for him, I am glad he found a friend in you, y/n. Cassian and I may be his brothers but he still doesn't confide in us completely, he is too afraid to burden us. Feyre and you are good for him.”

You returned his smile, “We all need someone to lean on.” 

“Well, Is there anything you need assistance with before then?", he asked.

You shook your head, dismissing any further conversation. "No, I'll manage. Thank you, Azriel."

He lingered for a moment, as if debating whether to say something else, but ultimately turned to leave without another word.

As the door clicked shut behind him, you couldn’t help but feel a pang of disappointment. It wasn’t directed at Azriel, but rather at yourself for the walls you had built, preventing anyone from getting too close. Yet, at the same time, you couldn’t bear the thought of letting those walls crumble, leaving you vulnerable to the possibility of rejection. Aside from that, even if he did feel the same way, how long will it last? That too with your newly immortal lifespan? You have witnessed true love fall apart in a short time in the human lands. How would it not end in anything but pain in the life of an immortal? If there was one thing you knew for sure, it was that to love, is to destroy. Not telling Azriel was the best option for yourself, you were not going to invite pain to your doorstep.

With a heavy heart, you retreated to your room. You knew that sooner or later, Azriel would find out but for now, you allowed yourself the temporary respite of distraction. 

Later that day, the anticipation of Eris's arrival hung heavy in the air as you prepared for the meeting. Despite your best efforts to focus on the task at hand, thoughts of Azriel and the unresolved tension between you lingered at the edges of your mind.

As the sun began its descent, casting hues of orange and pink across the sky, a knock at the door signalled Eris's arrival. Taking a deep breath to steady yourself, you made your way to the entrance, your heart pounding in your chest.

Opening the door, you were met with the sight of Eris standing tall and imposing, a smirk playing at the corners of his lips. His eyes, a striking shade of amber, sparkled with mischief as he took in your appearance.

If you were to describe him, you'd call him the living embodiment of fire. 

He was the light to Azriel's dark, they were opposite in every way possible.

“Well, well, well, if it isn't the infamous Y/N," he drawled, his voice smooth like silk. "I must say, you're even more captivating in person."

You rolled your eyes at his flattery, though you couldn’t deny the flutter of excitement that his words stirred within you. "Save the charm, Eris. It won’t work on me."

He chuckled, stepping closer until there was barely any space between you, the air between felt charged, "You wound me, darling. I assure you, my intentions are nothing but genuine."

Before you could retort, Azriel appeared beside you, his presence like a sudden gust of wind that left you breathless. Though his expression remained neutral, you couldn’t shake the feeling of tension radiating from him.

You did miss how Azriel's heart rate was unusually increased, while Eris' remained stable calm and genuine, just like he mentioned before. 

“Eris," Azriel greeted with a nod, his voice devoid of warmth.

"Az," Eris replied, his smirk widening as he used Azriel's nickname. "Always a pleasure."

The air crackled with unspoken tension as the three of you made your way to the meeting room. Eris's gaze lingered on you, his eyes flickering with a mixture of curiosity and desire that sent a shiver down your spine as you all took your seats.

“Imagine how surprised I was when my high lord told me that you had requested a meeting with the night court.” you began holding the prince’s eyes.

“I had requested to meet Rhysand but I am not complaining. You are far better to look at.” Eris said with a smirk that never seemed to leave his face.

“I'll inform him that you were pleased by the arrangement.” you replied with an earnest smile.

Maybe this could be fun, you thought.

Maybe you found Eris fun.

As Eris seemed to give another flirty retort, Azriel spoke.

“Why are you here?

“Ugh! You are no fun Azriel. It’s not like you don't know already.”

You raise your brows at him, asking him to elaborate. 

Eris obliged, “I want to…” he  seemed to pause choosing his words carefully, “relieve my father from his duties and be the high lord of Autumn court.”

You couldn’t help but snort a laugh at his words, “‘relieve my father of his duties’? My, my, whatever happened to daddy's loyal boy?” 

You caught the slight upper tilt of Azriel's lips just as your powers detected the slight rise in the pulse of Eris before it slowed down again.

“Apparently he's not as loyal as you thought.”

“How can we trust you?”

“Who are you kidding, princess? I'd be a fool not to know about your interesting powers.”

“Fair enough, what does the night court have to do with this?”

“Help me, to get rid of my father, support my claim as the high lord.”

“Why would we do that? We’d then be replacing one monster for another.” you shot back.

If your words affected him, he showed no signs of it, physically at least, but the small spike in his cortisol levels and the drop in his pulse told you your words hit their mark.

Eris's smile tightened ever so slightly, but he maintained his composure, leaning back in his chair with an air of practised ease. "I can see why you might think that, but I assure you, I'm not my father. Unlike Beron, I see the value in alliances and mutual benefit."

Azriel crossed his arms, his eyes narrowing. "Convincing words, Eris, but words are cheap. What do you have to offer in return for our support?" 

You couldn’t honestly remember when was the last time you had heard him speak this much, or if you had ever interacted with him for more than a few words.

Eris's gaze flickered to Azriel, then back to you. "Information. My father is planning something that could have catastrophic consequences for all of us. He's been working with a human queen—one who has a vested interest in starting a new war between our realms."

Your heart skipped a beat, a sense of dread settling over you. "Which queen?"

Eris's expression grew grave. "Queen Briallyn. She's amassed a formidable army and is working with my father to create a weapon that could tip the scales in her favour."

You exchanged a glance with Azriel, whose stoic expression betrayed a flicker of concern. "What kind of weapon?"

"One that can manipulate the very fabric of magic itself," Eris replied, his voice low and serious. "It could render even the most powerful High Lords and their courts defenceless."

Azriel's eyes darkened. "And you have proof of this?"

Eris reached into his coat and pulled out a small, intricately carved box. He placed it on the table and opened it to reveal a collection of documents and maps. "These are the plans and correspondences between my father and Queen Briallyn. Everything you need to verify my claims is right here."

You leaned forward, scrutinizing the documents. The meticulous detail and undeniable authenticity left little room for doubt. 

You sighed passing the letters to the shadowsinger. "Just when we thought Prythian had a moment of rest."

Eris met your gaze, his expression was earnest. "Our courts need to work together."

You considered his words, the weight of the decision pressing down on you. It was a risk, but the potential consequences of inaction were too dire to ignore. "Assuming we agree to help, how do you propose we go about it?"

Eris's smirk returned, though there was a determined glint in his eyes. "We can meet regularly and update eachother with what we know and proceed from there."

Azriel's gaze remained fixed on Eris, his expression unreadable. "And what guarantees do we have that you won't betray us once you have what you want?"

Eris leaned forward, his amber eyes burning with intensity. "You have my word and the knowledge that if I betray you, I'll be signing my own death warrant. Beron would kill me in a heartbeat. I need this alliance as much as you do."

You took a deep breath, weighing the risks and benefits. Finally, you nodded. "Alright, Eris. We'll discuss this with our high lord and get back to you. But know this—if you betray us, there will be nowhere in this world you can hide."

Eris inclined his head, a genuine smile tugging at his lips. "Understood. Now, I've always been curious about your powers," he began, his tone light but laced with genuine interest. "I've heard rumours, but I find that firsthand accounts are always more... enlightening."

You arched an eyebrow, meeting his gaze with a guarded expression. "Have you now, Eris? And I’m not in the habit of revealing my secrets to just anyone." Your powers were not publicized much, you and Rhys decided it was more advantageous to keep it quiet. But they weren’t a secret either.

Eris chuckled, the sound warm and inviting. "Ah, but I'm not just anyone, am I? People talk about you being able to control the very essence of life itself. Now, that sounds rather impressive, don't you think?"

You chuckled softly, crossing your arms. "Rumours tend to exaggerate. I'm sure the truth is far less exciting."

Eris took a step closer, his gaze never leaving yours. "Is that so? From what I understand, you can manipulate the body on a molecular level. Imagine the possibilities... and the danger."

You shrugged, feigning nonchalance. "Dangerous, perhaps, but only to those who give me a reason to use it."

His eyes gleamed with amusement. "Fair enough. But tell me, how does it work? Do you just think about it and—poof—someone's heart stops beating?"

You gave him a sly smile. "If I told you, I'd have to kill you. Or at least give you a nasty headache."

Eris laughed, a rich, warm sound that filled the room.

Eris's expression grew more serious, though his smile remained. "You know, Y/N, there's something else I've been thinking about.”

You looked at Azriel and joked, “Look at that! You have certainly been thinking a lot recently, haven’t you Eris? Looks like you’ve been having a lot of thoughts.” You were surprised that Azriel gave a small smile from the way he had tensed this entire meeting, waiting for a chance to pounce on the Autumn prince.

Eris widened his smile at your comment as he continued, “Here’s my proposal, this alliance between us... it could be more than just a political arrangement."

You tilted your head, intrigued despite yourself. "Oh? And what exactly are you suggesting, Eris?"

He leaned in closer, his voice dropping to a conspiratorial whisper. "I'm suggesting a union between our courts, a marriage of sorts. Think about it—together, we’d hold so much power." 

Azriel lost all his self-control as he whispered in a deadly calm tone, “You have gone insane.”

You laughed softly, shaking your head. Your powers silently rush to soothe Azriel before he does something reckless, "You certainly don't lack ambition, I'll give you that. But why on earth would I consider such an arrangement?" 

Eris's gaze softened, and for a moment, you caught a glimpse of something deeper in his eyes. "Because I believe we could be unstoppable together. You're powerful, intelligent, and, if I may be so bold, quite captivating. With your abilities and my resources, there's no limit to what we could achieve."

You felt a flicker of something—curiosity, perhaps, or maybe even the faintest hint of intrigue.

“Too bad you were already mated, if only he knew”, you thought to yourself.

A slow thought crept into your mind, “So what if you were mated? Nothing was going to come out of it anyway.” 

"Captivating, am I? You do know how to charm, Eris. But you'll have to do better than that to convince me."

Eris's smile widened, his eyes gleaming with determination. "Consider it, Y/N. Imagine what we could accomplish together. The Autumn Court and the Night Court united as one. We could bring peace, prosperity, and a new era of cooperation to our people."

You studied him for a long moment, weighing his words. There was no denying the potential benefits of such a union, but there were also risks—trusting Eris was a gamble, and one you weren't sure you were ready to take. Thoughts of what he did to Mor screamed in your head.

“I didn’t forget your past with Morrigan, Eris. You still expect me to agree to this?”

His eyes narrowed at that, “Morrigan knows the truth of what happened that day. Ask her for the entire truth.”

Confusion bloomed inside you at his words but you did not have time to sort through lies now, Azriel was too agitated and you were left with an important choice to make.

"I'll think about it," you finally said, your tone careful. "But don't get your hopes up, Eris. I'm not so easily won over." you slipped a mask of playfulness again.

Eris chuckled, rising from his seat with a graceful fluidity. "I wouldn't expect anything less from you, Y/N. Just promise me you'll keep an open mind."

You nodded, a small smile tugging at the corners of your lips. "I'll keep an open mind. But remember, Eris—if you cross me, you'll regret it."

He inclined his head, his expression earnest. "I wouldn't dream of it. Until next time, Y/N."

With that, Eris turned and left the room, leaving you alone with your thoughts. The idea of a union with Eris was both tempting and daunting, and you couldn't help but wonder what the future held for the two of you—and for your courts.

The room settled into an uneasy silence. You could feel the tension radiating from Azriel beside you, a stark contrast to his usually calm demeanour. His jaw was clenched, and his shadows seemed to writhe and twist around him with a life of their own.

You turned to face him, concern etched into your features. "Azriel, what's wrong? If I hadn’t calmed you Mother knows what you’d have done to him!"

Azriel’s eyes, usually a cool and controlled shade of hazel, now burned with a fierce intensity. "What's wrong? Are you seriously considering his proposal, Y/N?"

You blinked, taken aback by the intensity of his reaction, you have never seen this side of him.

 "It's not as simple as that, Azriel. We have to consider all options if we want to ensure the safety of Prythian."

He took a step closer, his voice low and filled with barely suppressed anger. "Eris is playing a dangerous game. A union with him? You can't seriously think that's a good idea."

You met his gaze, your own frustration bubbling to the surface. "I'm not saying I'm going to marry him tomorrow, Azriel. But we can't dismiss his proposal outright. There’s the potential benefit—"

Azriel cut you off, his voice rising. "Potential benefit? He's manipulating you, Y/N! He wants power, and he’ll use you to get it. Do you really believe he has anyone's interests at heart other than his own?"

You felt a surge of defensiveness, your own anger flaring in response. "And what if he does? What if this alliance could actually bring about the change we need? We can’t afford to let personal grudges cloud our judgment. He meant everything he said today, not a single ill-intended thought!"

Azriel’s expression darkened, his shadows growing more agitated. "This isn't about personal grudges. This is about trust, about loyalty. Eris has proven time and time again that he can’t be trusted. And now he's proposing a union with you? He’s trying to bind you to him, Y/N. To control you."

You took a deep breath, trying to steady your emotions. "I know it’s risky, Azriel. But we need allies. We need every advantage we can get if we're going to take down Beron and stop this war."

Azriel’s fists clenched at his sides, his voice dropping to a dangerous whisper. "And what about your own safety? What about the risk to you? I can't stand by and watch you put yourself in danger for a power-hungry prince who will betray you the first chance he gets."

Your heart ached at the raw concern in his voice, hope threatened to manifest in you but you shoved it aside and held your ground. "Why do you care, Azriel? I can take care of myself. I’m not making any decisions lightly. I just need to consider every option."

Your words cut through the air like a sharp blade, and for a moment, Azriel seemed taken aback by your response. His gaze softened, his expression filled with a mixture of frustration and hurt.

"Why do I care?" he repeated, his voice barely above a whisper. "Because you are like Rhys’s little sister, you are one of us. Because I can't bear the thought of anything happening to you."

Though a part of you was glad he cared but you scoffed in disbelief, “Right. Because I am important to Rhys. Well, this decision is mine to make and I will discuss it with Rhys as it concerns his court. I’ll be sure to take what you feel into consideration. Thank you for your input, Azriel.”

His gaze hardened, a flicker of something unreadable passing through his eyes. "Fine. If that's how you want it. But have you ever stopped to consider the possibility that you might have a mate, Y/N?"

The question hung in the air like a heavy weight, the implication sinking in with a sickening certainty. You felt your breath catch in your throat, the blood draining from your face as you struggled to comprehend his words.

"What if you have a mate out there, waiting for you?" Azriel continued, his voice soft but filled with an undercurrent of pain. "What then?"

You recoiled as if struck, the weight of his words crashing down on you like a tidal wave. The truth, the painful, unbearable truth, threatened to drown you in its depths. A dry, joyless laugh came out of you.

"I don't have a mate," you spat out, your voice trembling with rage. You lied without a second thought. The ease of it scared you. "And even if I did, it's none of your damn business, Azriel. Stay out of my life."

With that final, venomous retort, you turned on your heel and winnowed out of the room, leaving Azriel behind in a cloud of anguish and regret. 

As you fled down the empty corridors of the townhouse, your heart ached with a pain you couldn't name. 

You opened Rhys’s study door without a second thought and sighed in relief as you found Feyre and him.

Realization of what truly happened spread through you like a bolt of lightning hit you. Both of them were quickly at your side, worried and asking you questions. A single tear slipped as your voice broke,

 “Not telling him was one thing, but lying to him? Oh cauldron, what have I done?”

Taglist: @sidthedollface2, @a-courtof-azriel, @whyonearthisyourusernamethi-blog, @acourtofsmutandstarlight,@katherinejess, @mybestfriendmademe , @landofpetrichor , @isa1b2h3 , @anuttellaa , @cherryinsalemverse

Let me know if you want to get added to the list or if I missed someone!

#Is it too late to make this into a eris x reader fic #these two are idiots and i love it. #azriel x reader #eris vanserra x reader #azriel fanfic #azriel #azriel angst #azriel/reader #azriel x you #acotar #rhysand #eris vanserra #eris x reader #azriel spymaster

[carlos-in-glasses]

I'm having some thoughts and feelings, for reasons.

The feelings are that I'm so grateful for this beautiful fandom and the beautiful couple in the picture above. The thoughts are beneath the read more and can be taken or left. The picture cannot be left, however. Taken is the only option. You need to see it because look how cute they are!

For prosperity:

Something I always 'explore', if you will, in my own writing is how people process the concept of time. Endings, beginnings, the past and the future linking up. Your past self always being with you like a spectre. The present feeling like a marble rolling around a tube... I think this is because I'm not good with change or saying goodbye, but I do know that endings always lead to something else. Which is scary, because you don't necessarily know what that will bring.

Thinking about all of the above in terms of Lone Star is a different beast for me personally, because I've never had this kind of experience with a show or characters before, where I'm so compelled by it that I found my way into the fandom and have been creatively stimulated to the point of writing 25+ fics for it (which isn't nearly as many as others have produced! But to me it feels significant). So for that reason I want to say: When the show ends -(WHENEVER THAT MAY BE) - the characters don't. They don't end, not really. As long as we choose to keep talking about the themes, sharing meta posts, writing them or drawing them or creating gif sets, and revisiting them in rewatches or YouTube clips - there they are. Always. Either suspended in their moment and so easy to revisit in all their glory, or put in new situations in fic and art even years into the future. If this hiatus has taught us anything, it's that even without the show on air, there are still plenty of stories to tell and interpretations to be had, based on what came before. When the show ends, the thing that will unfortunately go is the speculation aspect, but what we have instead is a beautiful completed work that can inspire and be meaningful forever to those who already love it and for those who will find it in the future - and it will be found. Anything that exists can be found. (See: deep sea fish that glow in the dark (!)). And things that don't exist can be imagined.

We're so lucky to be the ones in the know when it comes to the show and to Tarlos. We know how special it is, what a gift it is. I'm not a spiritual person but I do feel oddly spiritual when it comes to this. Idk.

Something I've always hoped (as I'm sure we all have) is that we would know ahead of time that it's over. The show not being renewed between seasons is a thought that horrifies me to my core. I remember thinking towards the end of season 4: "At least if it doesn't get renewed, it ends with Tarlos being canon-married." Which, as a Tarlos super-fan, was my no.1. concern, but I love and care about the other characters too of course.

Going into season 5 and fearing it could be the last season, I had a huge tummy ache wondering if Tarlos would be on the rocks. If they ended on a cliffhanger having assumed season 6 was on the cards, we'd never get a resolution. But Rafa's Cameos have really eased my mind in that regard. Based not only on the tiny amount he's given away, but the way he talks about them loving each other, it sounds like they're going to be okay - and we're going to see it for ourselves that Tarlos really is endgame. In a time when hope is needed, we do have this. AND we have each other! As long as Tarlos ends happy, I for one intend to keep dancing, even if it means I'm the eccentric up on the table on my own doing the robot. But I would always like others to dance with.

Whatever happens, which we don't officially know yet, we can get through it together.

#Cig personal #❤️ #Tarlos

[bullet-prooflove]

The General!Series - Part Four: Moving On: Beau 'Cyclone' Simpson x Reader

A little get well soon gift for my girl @dizzybee03

Tagging: @kmc1989 @justameresimp @agentorange9595 @lxaah11 @librarian1002 

Broken Buttons (feat: Harmon Rabb)- Beau discovers the real reason you broke things off with him.

Messy - Companion piece to Broken Buttons - Beau discovers the truth about what happened that night.

Choices - Companion piece to Broken Buttons and Messy - Beau and you discuss your choices moving forward.

Sitting in court is excruciating but Beau endures it, he endures it because no matter how fucking horrified and nauseated he is, you must feel it tenfold. He can’t imagine what it must be like to sit in front of a room of your peers and describe what that man did to you, to have your story questioned and torn apart, to have someone tell you to your face that you were asking for it. They try to paint you as unstable, the kind of woman who intended to sleep her way up the ladder, whose now crying wolf because she was rebuked.

He almost punches the prosecution attorney in the mouth for the shit he says to you. It’s only Mic Brumby’s iron clad grip on his arm that stops him from launching himself across the table and strangling the man.

It’s the physical evidence that’s the worst.

You had the competency to go to the hospital afterwards, you’d been bleeding, scared when the doctor had seen you. You’ve worked with enough women through your time in Victim Support Services to know the procedures, you needed the morning after pill, medication to counteract anything that son of a bitch might have given you.

The hospital had logged you under an anonymous patient I.D. It’s something they do for victims of sexual assault when they collect evidence, when they’re not ready to file a police report.

It sickens Beau to hear the injuries you’d sustained, he hadn’t realised how violent it was, not until then.

You’re found not guilty of the offense. The jury of your peers accepts that you acted in self-defence when you broke the General’s nose, that you were too traumatised to attend work in the aftermath.

Your case, it opens doors for other women it’s happened to because you weren’t the first woman he did it to, you weren’t even the last. He’s arrested during a charity function for victims of sexual assault and the fucking irony of that astounds Beau.

You spend an hour in the shower after you give your testimony, before you fall asleep on the couch with your head in Beau’s lap. He spends the whole night, his fingers running soothingly through your hair as he begins to plan the next steps.

You’ve told him you can’t stay in Washington, that Admiral Chegwidden has granted you a transfer back to San Diego. There’s too much trauma attached to this place.

He spends the next couple of days helping you pack up your things. You throw away more away than you keep because you don’t want the bad memories following you. Harmon Rabb and Mic Brumby turn up on moving day to help carry the boxes down to the truck. Besides him, they’re the only two people who’s touch you don’t flinch away from these days.

“Thank you.” Beau tells Harm when the two of them are alone in the apartment, grabbing the final few boxes. “For bringing me here, for fighting for her.”

“Don’t thank me.” Harm says, his voice gruff as he crosses his arms over his chest and stares out of the window. “It happened on my watch. I  was there that night, I should have stuck around but me and Mac were going through some shit…”

Harm shakes his head, his jaw clenching.

“It never should have happened.”

Beau sighs, shifting the box he’s carrying to his other hip.

“Ally doesn’t blame you and neither do I.” Beau tells the other man. “If it wasn’t that night, it would have been another. You heard the testimony, once he had her in his sights…”

It was the same with all the others, that son of bitch had enjoyed the chase, it made catching his prey all the more sweeter. He treated every single one of those women like a trophy, something to be hunted down, caught.

“I need you to promise that you’ll check in every once in a while, tell me how she’s doing.” Harmon says, his palm rubbing over the back of his neck.

“I will.” Beau tells Harm as he picks up the remaining box and heads towards the apartment door. “Ally may need a little time but I’ll make sure to keep in touch.”

“She’s going to get through this.” Harm reassures him as they step out into the hallway, he waits as Beau closes the door behind him, locking it up for the final time. “It’ll take some time but she has it in her.”

“I know.” Beau says as he slips the key into the mailbox for the landlord to pick up. “If anyone can make it through something like this, it's her.”

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#beau simpson #beau simpson x reader #beau cyclone simpson #beau cyclone simpson x reader #top gun maverick #tgm

[holycatsandrabbits]

How to Write Implied Smut 

**Ironically, this article is somewhat NSFW**

So you want to write about sex without writing about sex. (Or maybe you don’t want to, but you need to, which is usually where I end up.) Some writers and readers love smut, and some don’t, which is totally valid. Or sometimes you’ve got a couple of characters who’d like to get it on, but your story guidelines require a SFW rating. Whatever the reasons for keeping things under cover (pun intended), here are some helpful hints about hinting:

Method 1: Read between the lines

In this approach, there are no sex scenes at all, no (heavy) kissing, no wandering around in nothing but your socks. You want the reader to know Jane and Betsy participate in a certain indoor sport together, but we’re not going to pop a single blouse button on-screen. Here are three ways to do it:

Situation-based clues include having Jane and Betsy share a room at a hotel, arrive at work or leave together, keep their stuff at each other’s houses, wear each other’s clothes, etc. 

Other characters can assume Jane & Betsy are a couple, knowing that if you text one at three a.m. the other is likely to answer, or if you tell Jane something, Betsy will immediately know, or even blatantly stating they aren’t just roommates.

Jane and Betsy themselves can act like they’re lovers in a SFW way. G-rated signs of offscreen physical intimacy include sitting in each other’s laps, touching faces, briefly kissing on the mouth, and holding hands.

This “between the lines” method leaves the physical relationship entirely to the reader’s imagination. There are no hints of specifics in the bedroom, no scenes that will get your reader’s temperature rising. Perfect for some writers and readers. The next two methods have more heat.

Method 2: Kiss and don’t tell

This is what they call “closing the door.” Cue your characters kissing and then fade to black, and if you want to say what happens afterward, stick to general terms. You know, it was a very enjoyable evening, they got to know each other better, Jane learned what it was like to spend a night with Betsy. 

You can also have Jane and Betsy wake up in bed together the next morning, possibly showing them zipping up their dresses or even searching for their dresses wherever they may have been flung off on the way to the bedroom. You can even hang handcuffs from the headboard—and guess what? That’s all still G-rated.

Example from my (rare) SFW works:

They touched as much as they liked then, with fingers and mouths certainly, but also with toes and ears and knees. They laughed and moaned and they learned how to be as close as two people could ever be to each other, not just touching anymore, but for many sparkling moments actually being one body.

–The Other Arrangement (one of my Good Omens fanfics)

Unlike the first method, this “close the door” bit leads the reader into thinking about the specific bedroom scenario you’ve set up, which they can imagine at any heat level they like—or not imagine it at all. (Not everybody wants to look through the keyhole.) The last method is a bit more, well, explicit.

Method three: Think hard—er, carefully—about word choice

How to say they’ve got erections without saying they’ve got erections:

“Oh,” said Aziraphale, in a brave voice, “and here I thought my enthusiasm was rather obvious.”

Crowley didn’t move, but the expression on his face suggested that he could feel exactly what Aziraphale was talking about, and that he knew Aziraphale could feel the same from him.

-The Angel’s Bracelet (oh wow more Good Omens).

Believe it or not, you can actually have SFW sex on-screen if you’re choosy with words. So hard becomes aroused, ass becomes rear, tits become chest. Don’t name any super-naughty body parts at all. 

Terri was even softer and warmer than Heather had imagined, her curves unable to be contained by Heather’s small hands. Not that Heather didn’t try, and that was when they realized they probably should not be doing this in the library.

“You will let me take you on a real date, won’t you?” Terri asked, smoothing Heather’s hair where it had come loose from her bun.

“Well, what’s customary for a fifth date?” Heather asked, refastening two of Terri’s shirt buttons.

–Blind Date with a Book (wtf this is not Good Omens?!) 

In this “word choice” method, the reader knows exactly what’s happening, but it’s still safe enough to be read in public. It’s like naughty art with careful blurring. This method can be satisfying for a reader who doesn’t want to have to imagine the rest of the scene, or at least wants to know how the writer imagined it. And it’s good for writers who want to obey the letter of the law while still showing a love scene (see how I used the SFW term for “sex scene”?).

Writing smut without smut is a good tool (pun intended sorry) for writers because it lets those who don’t want to write smut still convey high heat between their characters, and because it lets smut-comfortable writers reach SFW audiences. I often have two versions of stories I’m submitting, one explicit and one not, so I can try more markets.

Please note you should never send an explicit work to a submission call unless the guidelines specifically say it’s allowed, because some editors/slush readers don’t want to read smut. When in doubt, politely query first.

Anyway if you want to read some more of my non-fanfic smut go here.

Thanks for reading! Looking for (SFW) inspiration? Get some weird writing prompts

This article was first published on my writing blog

DannyeChase.com ~ AO3 ~ Linktree ~ Weird Wednesday writing prompts blog ~ Resources for Writers 

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#Dannye writes #writing #writing tips #writers on tumblr #original fiction #writeblr #writeblr community #writing advice #smut #writing smut #sfw smut

[munchkinmarauder]

Let's talk Magneto's letter!

I'm not marking this as spoilers because we've probably all seen the panels from Scarlet Witch and Quicksilver floating around the internet at this point (but I do apologise if I do accidentally spoil it for someone - take this as your warning to scroll past and not read this post).

So after many months of speculation as to what the letter could be and if it has big reveals the contents of the letter is not a lore changing or retcon inducing reveal but .... Drum roll please.... that Magneto thinks the twins should stay apart, that they are dangerous together (particularly that Pietro is dangerous to Wanda and Wanda coddles Pietro) and that Pietro should have stayed dead after Magneto murdered him.

Wow isn't Maggie father of the year? What a girldad!

Jokes aside and let's get this out of the way because I know a lot of the Magneto is right crowd have been calling for Orlando's head over this character assassination or trying to argue Magneto is in fact right about the twins (despite the story and the twins themselves saying otherwise) - Magneto being an abusive douchbag to his kids is the norm, we only have 60 years of their relationship in the 616 verse alone to prove this. Yes there is nuance to this that makes it all very interesting, one of the most interesting dynamics in Marvel, and I personally never expected to hear Magneto saying the silent part out loud because I do think cannon shows that he loves all his kids Pietro included (but is incapable of loving them the way a parent should), but this is simply an over exaggeration and not out of character. Its no surprise he says this to his son. It's also of note that Magneto never actually intended for the twins to see the letter or Storm would have given it to Wanda when she visited in SW#2 to deliver the news of Magneto's passing, it might have been Magneto trying to work out some feelings and opinions rather than protect them as he claims (cause again he didn't actually intend for anyone to see the letter, he sealed it shut in a box). He is justified in feeling frustrated that his last words were weaponised against his children (lol Mags being like how dare my own hurtful words were used to hurt my kids - no one hurts them but me)

Magneto is one of those genderbended boymoms that is jealous of their daughter and views then as competition. Only in this case it is with his son and the competition is for Wanda's affections. The fact is, Magneto is always going to loose that fight and he knows it.

The more I think about it the more I like that this letter wasn't a big reveal (though I'm sure the recton everyone is hoping for will come some day -I'm glad it wasn't today) but something that played into the themes of this series. Their father, the Wizard and the Giver are all saying the twins should stay apart and the story and the twins say no and prove them wrong. A lot of the twins greatest feats are reactive and evolving, tying back to the red queen hypothesis mentioned in issue 4.

On a side note if the Giver really wanted to deal with the twins she should have gone to dear old daddy Mags and he would have nipped that problem in the bud in a jiffy seeing as he and the giver are of a like mind when it comes to the twins. Technically you just need to get rid of one of them seeing as the Givers worry is about the twins together but let's see what the new Scarlet Witch solo has to say about that (I hope Pietro's role in this isn't forgotten but you can never tell with Marvel)

What the letter is is a classic case of a narcissist parent setting up a golden child and scape goat dynamic. Seeking to isolate the twins from each other. It's very clear he's self projecting onto his son (and Lorenzo Tammetta deliberately emphasises the similaries the two have in appearance to drive this fact home) and blaming Pietro for moments that happened that can apply to himself and are in fact caused by his actions for example his willingness to abandon his daughter to die and murder of his son in HoM. Both the major trigger points for the creation of the HOM verse and no more mutants. I'm not saying Magneto is souly to blame here but he does have a big contribution to what happens that he never has taken accountability for (along with the X-Men who play as victims and the avengers who did own up to what they did but otherwise keep silent about the blame the twins get from the X-Men).

A lot has been said about the impact of the letter on Pietro and I don't think I can add much more other than to emphasise how crushing that has be to hear from a parent and abuser even if you hate them. The twins helped each other survive for a very long time and we're each others everything parent, twins, best friend, protector, etc. You've spent time and energy and dedicated a portion of your life to protecting someone to the degree of making it your reason for living for a long time (please note I am not saying this is a healthy mindset for Pietro- hes taken it too far sometimes) and in a hypocritical tyraid are told it's all for nothing. Pietro handles it really well and comes out this with his head held high. Reacting calmly, expressing his love for his sister and throwing Magneto's words back at him. I think as a Quicksilver fan we can be reasonably happy with this outcome (but I do understand some fans frustration to hear Quicksilver be degraded that way and told he's bad for Wanda while she gets forced to interact with men that did treat her like shit like Vision and Magneto - however the point is that Magneto is WRONG and Wanda herself reiterates this point).

Now the one person who's screwed over by the writing and out of character in that scene is WANDA. Sure she tells Magneto he is wrong but that gentle response (even if she does react with a degree of unhappiness to see Magneto back) and effort to be neutral is so odd for her given that she sent the Wizard to a hell dimension for hurting her brother a few pages prior and has been even more vocal than Pietro in calling her father out in the past. She's as protective of her brother as he is her and I can't believe she would be written as a daddies girl and standby while a man who abused them both continues to abuse her brother.

The contents of the letter is also not great for Wanda. And I would argue is a subtler abuse tactic. Like a lot of the focus is rightly on how shitty it was for Magneto to say what he did in his letter to Pietro but we're also not considering the the negative implications it has for Wanda as well. Wanda has been working to establish herself as independent and not defined by the men in her life for so long and here is her "father", infantalising her and saying he knows better than her about her own life and what keeps her safe, that is seeking to take away from her the one pillar of support she's always had and one of if not the important relationship to her, a lot of Wanda's lowest moments did happen when Pietro wasn't even around, when everyone including Magneto abandoned her, her brother was there. The twins do have a codependency and that codependency does have it's toxic elements, Magneto touches on it but doesn't go into detail. Wanda is codasended to and told she is "coddling" her brother and everything else is Pietro's fault. The letter is worse for Pietro but it's shitty for Wanda too, she is a grown woman& a mother here is a man that abused her talking down to her, saying he knows best for her and her opinions are wrong, seeking to isolate her and undermining her authority.

The twins are right for saying Magneto is wrong but wish Wanda would get more angry at this undermining. Maybe like Pietro she is just very jaded and tired of the whole thing with Magneto. These words would be upsetting if they didn't in their own way love their father too as fucked up as it all is.

Now to be fair - does Magneto's letter have any merit? That isn't to easy to answer but in the interests of equal analysis let's try!

So I think one think that Magneto touches on but doesn't go into or outright say is the twins codependancy. He is a few years late to the party but he's been dead and their not dad for a while so well give him a small amount of leeway in his old age. I don't think the twins codependency is necessary a wholly bad thing but it does have it's nagative elements and in some cases has held the twins back. If we are to adopt a charitable approach her Magneto in his own twisted and emotionally constipated way may be trying to encourage the twins to be independent, to discourage his son from defining his self worth around his ability to protect his sister. Ofc I am reaching a bit here as Magneto could have just said this (though we'll never see the full contents of the letter - both Wanda and Mags may be summerising the worst parts of it) and done so in a way that wasnt cruel.

I also do believe that Magneto in writing those words to a degree did believe or convinced himself that he was not writing those words out of Malice and that it was an attempt to protect the twins (though I will reiterate how much it was actually intended to protect them when Magneto didn't actually intend for the twins to see the letter but at least he owns up to the fact he did write those words). In his mind he was being cruel to be kind but the narrative makes it clear that even if he had "good" intentions - he is nevertheless still fundamentally misunderstanding his children and self projecting onto his son. I'm not mad about this -its in character and I feel this letter is set up for a longer plot thread and I hope it's explored but let's see!

It certainly makes me feel that Pietro's lack of mention in RoM was extremely deliberate as was his lack of appearance in last week's FoX issue despite his cameo in the previous one to save the Magneto and Pietro reunion for this comic (the Xoffice are collaborative)

Is the writing for this scene perfect? no! Is Magneto potentially a tad one note? Yes but being a dick to his kids is in character and it's unsubtle but sometimes it needs to be.

#scarlet witch and quicksilver #quicksilver #pietro maximoff #wanda maximoff #maximoff twins #magnet family #magneto #erik lensherr #max eisenhart

[f0point5]

The new fic was wonderful, I cant get enough of Em and Max I hope you never stop writing about them! That being said, I'm curious, would you write about one (or all four!) Times Max had to run around a city looking for Emelia?

Okay I’m sorry about how this turned out 🫣 I know in the fic it referenced that Max didn’t know there was a problem and only found out once she left but I am taking some artistic license with this being one of the four times! Don’t hate me 🫠

I did actually start a different one featuring Emilia’s dad so I may finish that one and we will get a funnier/more on brand instance of Emilia running away but…I hope you enjoy this one in the meantime!

✨Set in September 2021✨

They nicknamed her “The Bolter”

Max watches the sunrise in total, deafening silence. He thinks at some point he gets up to feed the cats. He thinks, but he isn’t sure. He’s so tired. His eyes are watering. It’s not tears. He can’t sleep. He wants to. He doesn’t want to. It doesn’t matter if he wants to, he can’t. He can’t sleep knowing you’re not home. He can’t sleep not knowing you’re safe.

He looks at his phone again. He has it on loud and on vibrate but he still checks. Still hopes.

Daniel: Did you hear from her?

Lando: She’s not answering me sorry

Clara Albizzi: You fucked up

That last one makes me feel sick. He did fuck up. He knew the second he’d said it. The way your face just fell and you couldn’t look at him. The way your shoulders hunched over.

You’re the reason she’s not here!

You hadn’t even packed a bag. Hadn’t even taken keys for a car. You’d just picked up the shoes that were lying in the hallway and left.

And he’d let you.

It had taken everything in him to stand still and let you leave, even as the fear set in. Fear that smelled like freshly cut grass and petrol. Fear that felt like crisp night air. Fear that looked like headlights in the dark.

The restraint had only last a few minutes.

You had blocked him, of course. So he’d called your friends. He’d ended up calling half of Monaco including more drivers than he ever spoke to regularly. Everyone denied hearing from you. He’d actually driven to Daniel’s to confirm his story that he wasn’t home. Max wondered more than once if you’d earned more loyalty from his colleagues than he had. Even if one of them was lying to him, at least you were safe.

But he couldn’t take the chance that you really hadn’t ended up at someone’s place. You didn’t have you bag with you, or even comfortable shoes. You couldn’t pay for a cab. It was that thought that had sent him to the Hotel de Paris. It was your favourite hotel in town, you even checked in for staycations sometimes. They would have your information, so you wouldn’t even need a credit card. The receptionist had refused to tell him if you were staying there - illegal, apparently - but something about his appearance must have incurred her sympathy, because she’d said that they hadn’t had any unexpected guests.

That had sent him to Sass Café. A long shot, because you didn’t usually self medicate alone, but he’d tried anyway. Fifty times he thought he’d seen you across the room as he’d weaved his way through the hoards of people. Normally he could spot you anywhere but when all he wanted was to see you he’d seen you everywhere.

By the time he’d got home, some time in the wee hours, Max could feel himself starting to shut down. As he’d called your name to no response and checked your room to find it empty, he could feel himself starting to get cold. He’d sat down on the couch, intending to think about what he was going to do next, but the thoughts had started to get away from him. The memories of the last twelve hours began to fold in on themselves, becoming smaller and squarer and so too did the feelings. The anger, the frustration, the panic, the disappointment, it all got more manageable, packing itself away in the corner in his mind that Max had so often found himself hiding in.

Even the fear had gone. The fear had gone somewhere around 5.30 am, when the darkness started to wane. As he sat on the couch and watched the sky go from black to blue to the colour of the dress you wore to Luka’s christening, his leg stopped shaking, his fists unclenched, and the tightness in his chest disappeared.

Finally, emotions had given way to a familiar and encompassing emptiness. Max just felt numb.

You’re the reason she’s not here!

What had he even been so angry about? He could almost laugh at himself. He hadn’t been angry. He’d been embarrassed. You’d told him you’d found underwear that wasn’t yours in the washing machine and he’d been so fucking embarrassed. And then he’d thought, what did he have to embarrassed about, and he decided in a split second it must be because you were judging him, and who were you to judge him when you were the reason he was fucking random girls in the first place. His relationship had ended because of you.

You’re the reason she’s not here!

Except you weren’t the reason. Not really. It had been Max’s choice and he knew that. Max needed you more than he’d wanted her and he had never once regretted that choice, although wherever you were, you probably thought he did.

He almost wishes he could feel all of it. Whatever it is that’s been forced under the surface because he can’t deal with it. He can’t feel anything. His eyes are sore and unfocused and they sting.

He drags a hand over his face. He should do something. Get flowers, or call the police, or…anything. But he doesn’t. His limbs don’t move. He just sits there…like he’s waiting for someone to pick him up.

You’ve got to come back.

Don’t worry, Max. They always come back. You’ll apologise. You’ll do better next time.

His eyes water again. This time it might be tears.

Somewhere behind him, one of the cats meows. Maybe he didn’t feed them after all.

“Max?”

At the sound of your voice, Max’s head turns so fast his neck hurts. He blinks furiously at the sight of you. For a second he thinks he’s imagining you.

“I brought strudel,” you say, holding up a small folded pastry box.

Max gets up before his he tells himself to. He wants to pull you into his arms, the urge to do it is the only thing he’s felt in hours, but stays still. You’re back, but that doesn’t mean he’s forgiven.

“I’ve been looking for you everywhere,” he says. His voice sounds hoarse.

“Not everywhere, clearly,” you say with a shrug.

“I went to Sass, Daniel’s, I called Lando, Alex, Clara, Zita,” he says, as if trying to prove that he’d tried. “I went to the hotel to see if you were there. I’ve been around the whole city all night, I didn’t sleep,”

“Oh.”

You look a little sheepish, almost guilty, as you make your way to the kitchen. Max follows, too far behind for his liking but he’s still too scared to get closer.

He sits on one side of the island and you stand on the other. He really takes in your appearance now. Hair up, no make up. Wearing a pyjama shirt. Where the fuck did you get pyjamas? He doesn’t care. His eyes run over you one more time. He might never let you out of his sight again.

“Don’t scare me like that,” Max admonishes, though there is no strength behind his words.

“Don’t piss me off like that,” you retort, and there’s strength behind yours.

The look you give him cuts like second place, and he looks away. He looks out to the balcony. The sky is cobalt now. What time is it?

“Did you mean it?” You whisper into the silence.

Max looks at you now. “No.”

“But-“

“No.” This time it’s an oath.

You shake your head as you open the pastry box. “Max, you obviously kind of meant it,” you say, turning to pick up two plates from the counter. “And I don’t blame you. I know I’m the reason you and-“

“You’re not the reason,” Max insists. “She’s the reason. She thought…she made that choice. And yeah, a part of me is still angry about it, and I cannot talk to her so I took it out on you. That wasn’t right and I’m sorry. I don’t know why I even- I’m sorry. It was my fault,”

Take responsibility. It’s your fault. You caused this to happen. If you don’t like the outcome then stop making people angry.

“I’m sorry,” he says again, quieter this time. Even to his own ear it sounds a little more desperate.

You stare at him, eyes narrow, like you’re trying to read him, and Max almost flinches under the scrutiny. Finally, your face softens, and you sigh. Something in your posture eases.

“Max, it’s okay,” you say gently. “People fight. I just felt like shit and you know how I get. You’re fight, I’m flight, remember? I was…anyway, it doesn’t matter. We’re okay, right?”

“Yeah,” Max says. “Of course.”

You don’t look like you believe him, but he’s telling the truth. If you’re okay, then he’s okay. If you’re there, then he’s okay. If you’re home then that’s where he wants to be.

You shuffle around the island with two plates of strudel, padding on bare feet towards the living room with Max in hot pursuit.

“Where did you go?” He asks, now noticing that not even your shorts are the ones you left in last night.

“The Maybourne,” you explain, settling on the corner of the couch, legs outstretched. “The concierge gave me some spa pjs,”

Max takes a seat next to you, further than normal but closer than he’s been to you in what feels like forever.

“I’ll pay you back for the room,” he says with a rueful smile.

“Yeah, I think you will,” you say haughtily, and Max forced himself to laugh. There must be something in his expression that tips you off, though, because your face falls. “I’m sorry I left,”

Please don’t ever do that again.

The words are on the tip of his tongue but he swallows them. He doesn’t ask. He can’t. He has no right to ask you that, because no one can ever promise not to leave and he can’t promise to be worth staying for.

“It’s not the first time,” Max says with a chuckle, nudging you with his elbow. “I’m used to it by now,”

You roll your eyes and turn on the tv, flipping through to find the Moto GP race as Max yawns. The buzz he felt at your return is wearing off and the exhaustion is creeping up on him. He doesn’t want to sleep yet, though. Not when you’re still in his periphery. It’s stupid, but some part of him needs to be consciously in your presence for a while.

“Max, you can go to bed, if you want. I know you didn’t sleep,”

“No,” he says, a bit too quickly. He imagines that he blushes when you notice. His cheeks certainly burn. “I’m just….I’m fine here.”

You reach over to pick up a pillow and lay it on your lap. “At least lie down,” you say, patting the pillow like you do to get one of the cats to sit on you. Max hesitates, but only for a moment, because he’d do just about anything you told him right now.

He settles his head on the pillow, eyes fixed on the tv. He used to do this with his mum, he remembers. The first night joke after being with his dad for months, she’d put on a movie and Max would lay his head in her lap while they watched. He doesn’t think he’s ever told you that.

Your hand running through his hair is like a little jolt of energy, somewhere above him he hears you giggle at the shiver that goes through him. You don’t stop, though, finger massaging his scalp. It quiets all of his nerve endings.

“You need a haircut,” you tell him. He knows what you’re doing, but he can’t bring himself to care. As long as it’s you doing it.

“Yeah,” Max agrees. It’s the last thing he says before he finally falls asleep.

#max Verstappen x reader

[silenzahra]

Hi!!! Figured I'd hop in on the ask by now... so here's a few! 😁

🤩🛒👀

In reference to this ask game ✨

Heyyyy!!! 😁😁😁 AW yay!!! Thank you so much for asking, dear friend! Let's-a go! ❤️

🤩 - Since I already answered this one here with our man Mario, I'll choose Luigi now! Our baby is so sweet and tender that I always melt whenever I write him 🥹 And I relate to him a lot! I also have anxiety and get scared veeeery easily, as well as being extremely clumsy, and the social anxiety hits hard... 😅 I think it's actually more or less easy for me to write him because I know firsthand what it's like to have anxiety, and as I said, I share lots of traits from his personality, so really, writing him feels a lot like writing myself most times 😅

🛒 - I also answered this one here, but to add to the hugs and physical ways of the brothers of showing their love, I'll also include: comfort. Whether it's a very brief moment like in my latest fic or the whole story revolving around it, I just LOVE writing the brothers comforting each other, crying in the arms of the other, feeling safe and sound only when the other is hugging them... I swear I'm melting just by thinking of it 🥹❤️💚

👀 - Ooohhh I see... Hm, how about that nightmare fic I owe you and that I intend to post this month at last? 🥰

"No, Lu, no!"

Luigi feels a pang in his heart, not only at the fear and sadness that permeate Mario's voice, but also when he notices, under the pale glow of the moon that shines through the window, the tears that slide down his cheeks. What must his brother be dreaming that makes him cry so much? His face is twisted into a grimace of despair and desolation, and his chest heaves up and down between gasps and sobs.

"Mario,” Luigi calls softly, placing both hands on his twin's cheeks in an attempt to get him to wake up, to get him out of the clutches of that horrible dream, to get him to calm down.

But Mario keeps crying and repeating his name over and over again, his voice breaking more and more with each time Luigi's name escapes his lips, his eyelids clenched tightly as tears continue to flow from his eyes.

"Mario,” Luigi insists, raising his tone a little, and wipes his brother's cheeks with his thumbs. "Mario, listen to me: it's not real!"

Mario's crying stops for a while, but the wheezing doesn't stop.

"L-Lu?" he mumbles, hesitating, almost as if he's not sure he heard him.

"I'm here, Mario,” Luigi tells him hopefully, firmly, but also warmly, and caresses his face with extreme gentleness. "I'm with you. You're dreaming, Mario. It's a nightmare! It's not real!"

Mario's gasps continue for a few moments, his eyes still closed, his face showing confusion and uncertainty in equal parts. Luigi can feel that he's about to wake up, so, still cupping his sibling's face, he bends his head until his forehead rests on Mario's.

"I'm here,” he repeats softly. "Open your eyes, Mario."

I swear, the feels that I got just re-reading and translating this... 🥺 Hope you liked it, Vee, and perhaps @bberetd @peaches2217 @pepperycar @keakruiser @vulpixfairy1985

@stripetkattelalala54-gf @kelbreyworshipper would also like to read this? No pressure, of course, you're free to ignore this post if you're not interested! 🥰

Also, if I may add, this was a quick translation I just made, so perhaps it'll be worded differently whenever I post it! ✨

Thank you again so much for asking, sweetie! How I LOVE sharing snippets from my WIPs 😍😍😍

Again, to anyone reading this, feel free to send me as many asks as you'd like! 😁💖💖 (I'll continue answering tomorrow though, it's already past midnight for me!)

#asks #asks answered #ask game #writer ask game #ask away #ask me anything #ask me questions #send asks #super mario bros #super mario fanfic #mario and luigi #mario brothers #fanfic writer emoji ask #writing #silenzahra

[nabooro]

The Tale of King Dod Veruna and Enshadu

The full moon celebrations in Ojian were different to the ones in Theed. Dn. Sabrun told them all to hold hands in at least pairs and make sure nobody got lost as she led them through crowded streets filled with stalls of rice cakes and sweet breads dipped in thick syrups and large flat breads filled with meat that made her stomach growl just to hear it sizzle on its pans. Dn. Sabrun had promised them a good meal, though, and that where they were going was better than any of these distractions, so Padmé held onto Nura's hand and kept to the group, tugging Nura back whenever she started to get distracted.

Their teacher led them to the very coast, where a small crowd had gathered on a makeshift theatre, temporary seats and lights arranged, and even some tables in the back. Padmé followed her friends to their seats and sat with them, just close enough to Dn. Sabrun that she might hear anything she told them.

"Have any of you seen a theatre performance before?" Dn. Sabrun asked, as the performers began to set up. All of them were masked, some in plain enshué of tasse or synthsteel, the most of them white. Padmé wondered idly what the play was about.

One of the girls in the class raised her hand, though in the dim light Padmé couldn't see who. Dn. Sabrun said, "Have you seen the tale of King Dod Veruna and the Dark Lady?"

The girl hesitated. "No, but I saw Shiraya's Last Days."

Someone else said, "I've seen the holo!"

Several others chimed in, though Padmé did not. She hadn't seen the play before, but she didn't want to say it, not when many of the others had. Though she wasn't alone; several others were only looking among themselves.

Padmé knew the story, of course, or some of them, but if it was her choice, she liked watching Zenda—her mother said that was natural, because Zenda had the best adventures—and if it was her mother's choice, she would always watch Shiraya's stories. And if it was Sola's, it was cartoons. Enshadu had not featured much in their watching.

"This story is best watched," Dn. Sabrun said. "So pay attention, now."

Padmé adjusted in her seat and turned her attention to the beach, where the holo of a palace had been set up, and a performer in a King Dod Veruna enshué and a kua so long it dragged behind him stood, hands crossed behind his back.

In the background, one of the musicians began a low, haunting melody.

The séame began, "Ri cu nanké soc Veshinc, co fuâd re ké tugoné."

——————

Behind her, Anakin said, "Padmé."

Padmé looked up, and Anakin laughed. "What?" she asked, frowning.

"As much as I'd like to, I won't understand much of the holo if it's in Naboo."

Padmé sighed. She hadn't even realised the holovid, so familiar to her, would be basically gibberish to Anakin. "You could learn faster," she suggested, and Anakin laughed again.

"I will, I promise," he said, his eyes flashing to her stomach—still relatively flat, but Padmé knew that would probably not last. So he had noticed her murmuring to herself—well, to their child—in Nabooro. Nothing important, but it felt right, even here on Coruscant. Anakin had been meaning to learn Nabooro for the last three years, but it was only after she told him she was pregnant that his attempts had really gained any meaning. Until then, it had been only "I love you," and "dearest," and the few words she had taught him, all along similar lines. "But can we watch it in Basic now?"

"If you insist," Padmé said, teasing, and Anakin smiled, tucking his nose into her neck as she rewound the 'vid and changed the language settings to Basic.

The séame began once more. "Once upon a time," he said. Padmé repressed the wish to roll her eyes. The voice of the narrator in Basic was somebody with a deep and dignified voice and a Coruscant accent that reminded her a little bit of Master Kenobi. Anakin seemed to hear the resemblance, too, because he pressed a smile into her skin. "There was a just and fair King."

——————

The king's castle sat atop the moon, whence he watched all that happened in the Kingdom. This king was true and generous, brave and kind… but he had one flaw, and that was his pride.

One night, as the moon rose in the sky, the King's eyes fell for the first time on a part of his land where his light did not reach. Where all of his land seemed to shine back at him, this place sat dark and mysterious. Curious about this place, the King put away his royal cloak and his crown of silver, and wore simple clothing to descend to his kingdom, so he may have truthful answers. There, he asked in the surrounding villages about this strange, dark part of his world.

"That is the home of the Dark Lady," he was told. "She protects us from the creatures of the Deep, whom even the moon's light cannot protect us from."

This angered the King, whose pride in his light and his ability to protect every corner of his kingdom had sometime turned into arrogance. At once he took to the home of this Dark Lady… and found that the Dark Lady was only a woman, and nothing more. What could a simple woman do that his light, the light of the moon itself, was not capable of?

He asked her so.

The Dark Lady said, "The light of the moon cannot touch the Deep, and in truth never should."

——————

The performer that played Enshadu had not donned the traditional enshué, but a deep black one with a single tear limned in silver. Padmé watched as King Dod Veruna and Enshadu began a battle with their staffs, their long sleeves and cloaks fluttering around them as they did. It was beautiful—the moon caught upon the silver-threaded embroidery on their clothing and turned them almost into holos of themselves.

"Who do you think will win?" Dn. Sabrun asked.

"They can't fight," Suvane said, sounding shocked. "King Dod Veruna and Enshadu love each other!"

Padmé frowned. That was true, and she knew that, but the sight of their battle had made her think that this was a different tale, or an older one.

"They will," Dn. Sabrun said.

Nura seemed to be in agreement with Padmé. "How?" she asked, pouting. "They're fighting."

Dn. Sabrun seemed amused. "Are they fighting?" she asked. "Or are they dancing?"

——————

The King, angered, said, "There is no place in my kingdom that my light cannot touch." And revealing himself as the King who lived upon the Moon, he ordered every lantern upon the moon lit, until each river in his kingdom shone back the veins of his land. His servants hurried to obey, but the King found the Dark Lady's home unchanged, still under shadow.

"Even now," the Dark Lady said, "the moon's light does not touch the Deep."

Growing angrier still, the King now had great mirrors built, and turned them thus that his own light may shine even brighter, until every lake in his kingdom became a mirror in itself and turned his own light back to him.

"Even now," the Dark Lady said, saddened, "the moon's light does not touch the Deep."

Finally, unable to relinquish his pride and furious to have twice failed, the King summoned the light of the sun to himself, and shone bright enough to illuminate all in the world, even the very shadows themselves. And as the light of the moon finally touched the Deep, all its creatures came forth, great beasts with teeth sharp as knives and mouths as wide as caverns. For these were creatures that had once been kept at bay by the Dark Lady's power, and upon seeing the brightness now they emerged.

"What have you done, King?" the Dark Lady asked, mournful, at the sight of these beasts, who began to crawl over the land, destroying villages and harvests, cities and forests, with no impunity.

Realising his error, the King pulled away his light. First, the King returned the Sun's light, which had never been his to keep. And still the creatures of the Deep crawled over the land, until his kingdom's towns and cities began to crumble.

Then, he dimmed his lanterns, and still the creatures of the Deep ravaged his kingdom, until the people of his land had to lift their own weapons, afraid that their King could not protect them against these beasts.

Finally, he shattered his great mirrors and spread them through the skies, each piece too small to reflect more than a point of light… and even then, emboldened now, the light of the moon was sufficient for these creatures, who did not cease their horrors.

"What have I done?" the King asked, as the people of his kingdom died before him.

——————

Anakin looked mildly horrified as the exaggerated bodré continued their destruction of cities that deeply resembled Moenia and Theed, though of course they wouldn't have. "Padmé," he said, slowly, "this is a story you tell children?"

Padmé raised her chin in the air. "It was my favourite when I was young," she said. On the holo, something exploded. "Children love explosions."

Anakin snorted. "I… you're not wrong," he murmured. "Ahsoka's been telling me some of the popular stories in the creche, ones I never really heard. They're violent." He huffed, a noise of quick amusement. "But the Jedi wouldn't like all this talk of Light and Dark. Definitely not when the Light unleashes, ah, all these beasts."

Padmé shifted in his arms. "This isn't about the Force, though I can see the similarity. It's the moon's light. King Dod Veruna illuminates… the injustices and horrors people believe they can hide under the cover of the dark."

Anakin raised an eyebrow. "Why do I get the feeling you don't like the Dark Lady very much?"

Padmé paused, surprised. "They're not opposites, you know," she said. "If you follow the metaphor, it may look like Enshadu is just espousing ignorance, but that isn't it at all. She's the protector of the damned and the outcasts. She protects her bodré just as much as she protects the people in those villages. This holo is… simplifying it a little."

"Monsters need protection, too?"

Padmé raised an eyebrow. "Is it better to pretend they don't exist than to offer them… aid, if they're willing to accept it? Enshadu's presence is a reminder." She looked over at the holo, paused upon a still of Enshadu watching the destruction. The holo had her in tears, but Padmé remembered her own preferred version: a play she had watched recently, in which Enshadu wept not for the villagers, but for the creatures that did not know what to do with so much light.

"An unwelcome one, for most," Anakin murmured, as she continued the 'vid and King Dod Veruna's devastated features rose.

Padmé eyed him thoughtfully. "They're lovers, you know," she said. "King Dod Veruna and Enshadu. And protectors of lovers, together. Our own ceremony invoked them… heavily."

Anakin opened his mouth, then closed his mouth. "Play the 'vid," he muttered, and Padmé laughed.

——————

"Only the darkness is protection from the creatures of the Deep," the Dark Lady said. "Would that you had understood this, King."

"I bow to your wisdom," the King said. "Please teach me what it is I may do to end this senseless violence." And seeing that his humility was true, the Dark Lady pulled him into her embrace. As she did so, the black of her long neem wrapped around him, head to toe, and finally the moon, too, was hidden entirely.

As the light disappeared, the creatures of the Deep, blind once more, began to stumble back into their depths, and the villages of the kingdom were safe once more, though not unchanged from this time.

The King was moved and humbled by this act, and for the first time he gained an appreciation for the dark, which he realised was as much a part of his kingdom as his own light. He thanked the Dark Lady, but as he did, he saw that she could not see. "My eyes were not made for such light," she said, sorrow in her voice. "Having once seen it has changed me. I cannot see in my own dark. How, now, will I protect our people?"

And so, the King once more lit his lanterns, but wary of his past mistakes, he lit only those that would shine upon the surface of her home, and allow her to see.

And even to this day, you may find the moon shining upon the waters of the home of his beloved Dark Lady.

——————

Before them, King Dod Veruna unmasked Enshadu, and pulled her to him for a kiss, tying off a new enshué behind her head before they separated. This mask was the one Padmé knew—deep black, with a streak of silver down the forehead, over the nose, and past the lips: the streak moonlight left on the Dark Lady.

"Any questions?" Dn. Sabrun asked.

There were lots. "Why did he help her?" "Why did she help him?" "Why wasn't Zenda there?" "Why doesn't he wear his neem?"

"What does it mean?" Padmé asked Dn. Sabrun, as the performers parted to to mark just where the moon—not Veruna, but Ohma D'un—cast a bright halo across the lake, rippling out almost to the beach itself.

Dn. Sabrun said, "It means different things to different people," she said, patient. "What do you think it means?"

Padmé stopped. "What does it mean to you?" she asked.

Dn. Sabrun said, "To me, it means we all have much to learn, from the oldest and wisest of us to the youngest. And that we must help each other learn, whenever we can."

——————

"What does it mean?"

Padmé looked over her shoulder. "What did it mean to you?" she asked.

Anakin shrugged, but he looked thoughtful. "There's more than one way to skin a womp rat?"

Padmé grinned, carding her fingers through his hair. "You're not wrong. I've always seen it as a story of… ignorance, and its cost. Where even good intentions can fail." She paused, and rolled over to face Anakin. "And I've always found the lovers very romantic."

Anakin raised an eyebrow. "What's romantic about that? I assume the light and dark thing means they never meet again?"

Padmé shrugged. "That can be romantic! It's the sacrifice, I think: he gives her a little bit of his light just so she can see, and doesn't see her again so she can… be who she is without suffering. Do what she's meant to do, even if that means sacrificing his pride."

"He doesn't seem to have much to offer, considering he's the one who blinded her in the first place."

Padmé stroked her fingers across his forehead. "This is a kid's holo, but… there's this poem, Cu Saétâto so Enshadu, where Enshadu talks about how nothing she's ever seen before and nothing she'll ever see again will compare to the singular moment in which she was surrounded by King Dod Veruna's light. It's an erotic poem," she added, and Anakin's attention shifted.

"Is it? Tell me more about this… erotic poem."

——————

"What do you think it meant?"

Leia frowned. "Well, from one point of view, the King was responsible for all of the destruction himself. So perhaps it's about… ignorance and its consequences." She snorted. "Or it's a commentary on the carelessness and arrogance of royalty."

"You're royalty," Luke said.

Leia shrugged. "Self-awareness is a useful quality."

Luke shook his head. "I thought it was about forgiveness. The King was responsible, but—what happened wasn't what he intended."

"That doesn't change everything that was lost," Leia said. Luke nodded.

"I know. But if the Dark Lady hadn't forgiven him, it would never have ended." Leia gave him a wry look, like she knew what he was doing. Luke could feel his shoulders slowly rising to his ears, and he sat up straight again. "What are you giving me that look for? I haven't seen this before any more than you have."

Leia shook her head, but she was smiling. "I want to look into the Dark Lady more. All this beasts from the Deep and Dark nonsense just sounds like Imperial propaganda—how old is this 'vid, anyway?"

Luke checked. "Just a few years, but I don't think the story can be that different from the traditional ones." He clicked through a few articles, then slowed. "They're lovers, traditionally," he said. "The King and the Dark Lady. Enshadu." The name was strange in his mouth, unfamiliar. He imagined what it might sound like with practice, and said it again. "Enshadu."

"I wouldn't have guessed that from this."

Luke nodded. "I'd like to hear the real story, though. If they're lovers, then really, isn't this a story of everyone trying to protect the ones they love? Even if it doesn't always go well."

Leia's expression softened. "I suppose so. If you ever find a better 'vid, one that doesn't look like it was made to pander to Palpatine… well, you know where to find me."

Luke grinned. "I'll find something. Stories like this—they're always being told."

#star wars #sw fanfiction #anidala #padme amidala #nabooro #naboo culture #naboo #luke skywalker #leia organa #this is not how i intended to tell this story but you know what #i enjoy seeing different people interpret the same story. and i DEEPLY enjoy seeing its development in time #imagining fairytale retellings of this a la retellings of cinderella... my heart sighs #i need to add a ...thing with all the translations. and i will. eventually #i hope most of the words are clear enough though lol #.religion #.myths #.mythology #.six

[puppyeared]

who up seeing their disorder in a fictional character but feel like its not their place to put a name on it

#id have to be waterboarded before i can talk abt how i see a lot of my adhd and personality in mitsumi iwakura let alone post it #idk how to talk abt this without feeling like im talking over or invalidating ppls experiences relating with a character #someone was talking abt how ppl tie laios' autism to special interest and social difficulties but not much else which kinda flattens it #and then went into a respectful in depth analysis of other autistic behaviour that laios exhibits and it wasnt phrased meanly #its fascinating and important to me to hear someone explain a little bit abt traits that they recognized and often go overlooked #because it does help me learn more about it. but i think thats also where hesitancy kicks in when it comes to depicting it accurately #like i have adhd and some of my adhd symptoms overlap with autism (time blindness and pattern seeking behaviour) but that only means #it feels familiar to me even without having autism. on top of that traits arent always cleanly determined as being /caused/ by #a disorder. to understand my environment i compare it to something unrelated but similar to make it more familiar and for the longest time #i thought that was a personality thing and not an information processing thing since i loved playing pretend in my head as a kid #so if you make a character who experiences that hoping to reach people that also experience that and tell them its not weird or #smth youre making up like. thats the goal. ppl who dont get it arent expected to it just means it doesnt cater to them but it helps them #become familiar to it yk? since i dont have autism myself i dont feel confident i can depict it properly or explain it in my own words #but that doesnt mean im trying to dismiss it or try and cut it out completely.. ill just leave the floor open to someone who /can/ #a lot of issues around fanon depictions are when smth is baselessly popularized or a characters personality and behavior is flattened #especially to fit them into a trending meme. its harmless and its supposed to be for fun but it gets tricky when you drag things that #need to be carefully explained beforehand or else it gets lost in translation. like that tweet abt 'hyperfixating' on cooking pasta #once it becomes popular language usually the original meaning is left out for the sake of simplifying it for everyone that when it #circles back theres a sort of hesitancy like. am i using it the way it was intended or am i unknowingly using the popularized version of it #actually thats probably why i felt wrongfooted during diagnosis bc it felt like i was misusing the words i heard to describe what i felt #i /know/ i see a lot of myself in mitsumi because our minds are always somewhere else and we tend to put good faith first and for me #that personal connection is enough. but idk it feels like its always gonna have to be 'palatable' first before i can talk abt it openly #mad respect to writers and creators who stick to their story even if theres the looming fear of ppl misinterpreting it and letting them #have it.. its been almost 2 weeks and i am so close to deleting that m3 dunmeshi drawing bc ppl keep saying chilchuck wouldnt have 200 HP #IT LITERALLY SAYS I MADE IT WHILE WATCHING EP 1. I USED EARTHBOUND LOGIC AND I WASNT EVEN TAKING IT SERIOUSLY CHILL #yapping

[wereshrew-admirer]

marrow creek

#thinking about it #thinking about the detailed outline for an expanded 'duvall returns to marrow creek' story i have and daydreaming about doing it as a comic #i have maybe a third written out in it's intended format (a fanfic) #but i'm stuck on describing some details that woudl be so much easier to just draw #how long would it have to be though? how ridiculous would that be? #very (to both) #but i am thinking about it #i've been so busy with Life Obligations lately i miss my projects #anyway... what a concept #still don't know if it's a slipup or not that austin warned them to eat the fruit before the flowers bloom #i guess it could have meant 'before the next crop blooms' but for once i'm going with a more magic version #where the fruit comes before the flower #thinking also about chine's first instinct being to tell the farmer to get in the shed so they can protect them from katonya #ah - chine sangfielle - i feel about you #oh....................oh #hey so that doctor Lyke visits was also a projection of the course right? #the doctor that tried to get rid of the ravening beast permanently for him? insisted he was sick with it? #that's a nice and convenient retrospective rhyming #anywayyy back to work #broken record voice

[bluebellhairpin]

Hi sweet girl! It’s dissertation nonnie here (who is exceptionally shy so just messaged you back in your ask box) I saw your post and it warmed my heart! As someone who finds solace in getting lost in stories I find it so beautiful how you dedicate your writing something that takes so much emotional effort to the happiness of others, your fic was an escape for me and I only hope you find as much happiness writing it as I have reading it❤️ much love from your anxious nonnie :)

stop are you trying to make me cry or do you just REALLY want the next part of the fic (honestly if you were trying for both, you'd be getting BOTH) no one has said anything like this about any of my fics before I swear I might as well give you my whole life with how deep my feelings about what you said are.

#i'm like over here typing up the next part as i type this #and i'm so moved by what you said #shy anon or not you words mean so much to me - at this time more than you'd probably know #it is truly a joy for me to write and it is a story i intend to see it its end - no matter how long that takes #but when someone like you comes along and reminds me there ARE other people who care about it like i do #that really is my best motivator to get it finished #I KNOW how their story ends but you don't #so i have to finish telling it #I LOVE YOU SO MUCH #nemo answers #anon #the girl who knew the end

[batfamfucker]

Tell the truth comic fans challenge. When's the last time you read a comic and how many have you actually read?

P.S. This isn't me being gatekeepy btw I'm being genuine because I'm gonna be honest I've probably only actually read about five series and every thing else I've gotten from movies/series, online, or fanon. I know all the important events. Have I actually read them? No because my ADHD just wouldn't. And I can't be assed having to read important events if it's in a shit run by a bad writer.

#Also ngl I was determined to read from the very start but. I would not have the time for that in any life so lmao #I have read quite a few of the early Batman comics and do actually hope to read as many of his as possible #But I have not actually sat and read all of the Batfam origins yet tho I intend to #I know them all and I've seen the panels just never actually sat down and gone through it all #I also have read a lot of the Golden Era Batman and Superman team up comics where they basically act like parents #Taking Dick out on family day trips. It's a fun read tbh #And back when I was a early teen and couldn't afford comics I watched YouTuber who would read them for you and tell you about them/show you #So I've read half of Batman Eternal from that but he stopped uploading vids about it which made me really sad lmao #So I need to get around to reading the rest myself/rereading it because it's been a while #I think I liked the story but wouldn't canonise it in my mind #I also read a bit of Suicide Sqaud that way I think? So that too #I totally don't pirate read Injustice #I like it but I think some of it is iffy. But that's the case with comics in general #Batman: Wayne Family Adventures is the only I actually keep up with #Probably because it's more accessible but also because it's the kind of comic I've wanted about the Batfam for ages #There's room for improvement and I would like to see how one similar to that style would be made like. In the fully canon mainstream comics #Because I'm aware it's very fanon/fan servicey but honesty after all the DC chaos we deserve it. But I would like to see more family #Urban Legends is really good. But Idk. I'm very particular about my vision lmao #Let me be a writer is what I'm saving. Or make a competant TV show *Glares at Titans* #Titans is good but God do they fucking butcher Jason and Bruce. I am sick of DC TV and film adaptions doing the Batfam dirty #Like. The animated movies #Tim just is never a thing ever. Why #Titans does have him and I like that. But I haven't watched that season ngl because I don't like how they write Bruce #Like. He doesn't. Look for cjild soldiers bruh. I'm disappointed with Titans because they coulda done so well #But Bruce is far too old and they made Dick almost murderous with him and they fucked up Jason. I haven't seen Tim's- #-Characterisation yet but I'm scared to at this point #Alfred must be fucking dead because he would be SO OLD if Bruce is already like 60 bruh. No offence to the actor but yeah. #Chella Man is the best thing about the show. Tbf I adore the cast other than Bruce. But everyone is just so OOC and it doesn't- #Stick to the comics at all #Idk it just. Isn't it lmao

[narutomaki]

I always get self conscious when people talk about the amount of thought the goes/went into their art because there is.

there is no upper processing happening when I'm designing a character or background. my hand starts moving and my brain shuts off. I recognize there was probably a point in my life where this WASN'T the case but. like. it's why my art is like. mostly flat and lifeless. my art is never intended to tell a story because when I intend to I get angry/frustrated to the point of wanting to break shit because it's not going right. and I've tried to tell stories with my art both comics and stand alone pieces and it all feels fake or flat or.

idk.

I've TRIED to start and finish a piece where I've made conscious choices beyond "does this look good/right" and "am I being offensive in ways I'm aware of with anything here" but it just. makes me want to scream.

I learned people told stories with their art and I tried to and I stopped drawing for 5 years despite having. before that point been doing art studies for 8 to 10 hours a day for. 2 years.

I mostly just think it's because I have nothing to. say.

I can't add anymore tags to this post??? homophobia.

any way this post is useless idk I'm just sad because people do this thing so easily and enjoy it when it makes me break down crying. I don't get it. every person I've known regardless of neurodivergency has been able to do this consciously to some degree and enjoy it and meanwhile my stupid ass is asked how/why i chose something and I just. shrug. idk

looked nice?

#idk i probably say a lot UNintentionally #but like. #idk i feel like im just being. like. whining. for no reason. like boo hoo no one cares grow up if art makes you thay mad just stop drawing #like. man i WANT to think i WANT to tell stories i intend to tell along with the things i dont pick up on but. #i also mean like. if someone looked at a piece they could pick it apart comprehensively. like #but its like. idk. im like. i think im just to stupid for it. #im the same way with media analysis to be fair. which isnt like great but like. #why did someone choose this lighting? i dont know they thought it looked good ? #i have gotten 90-100% on every single analysis and opinion piece i ever submitted in HS for English #the only time i DIDNT get over 89% on an opinipn piece is when i tried to articulate my actual feelings on a topic to go along w researc #THAT got me pulled aside and told what i had written about was inappropriate and that i should think twice #before submitting a paper with that kond of content in the future #ao i did :^) and went back to bullshitting every single thing! #the curtains were blue in this scene to indicate not sadness but instead her deep love for uhhh fuck. flips through reading material and #lands on a random page. her dog buddy who is depcited in chapter (x) seeing as buddy is usually a male dogs name we can extrapolate and say #she chose these curtain colours after his death to remind her of the dog she had lost ÷ #end sentence end oaragraph submit paper withoit a secondary proof reading and lie and say i left the roigh draft at home. walk away #how did i get high grades. dude. like everyone says teachers know when a kids bullshitting but like #the teachers ATE MY SHIT UP 😑 i got used as an example of comprehensive stucture and analysis on more than one occasion #this is not me bragging this is me saying i never actually learned how to domthis stuff because i was supported in faking it #some people can do analysis like yhis on their first read through like. and remember it. how? how??? what??? #whay do you mean its because you read mote than thee sparknotes and random chapters because the book didnt interest you. #'we know when you dont actually read the book?' why did you compliment me on my comprehensive opinons of the parts i didnt readm #'We know when you write it the night before?' why did you laude me as an example of dedication put into an essay when i fucked around every #single in class wotk session past the first one and frantically typed and printed that in the computer lab before class 20 minutes ago? #why!! like DUDE #its like when they say they can tell when you use wikipedia to soirce things and then lie about it #and then compliment ur sources when youbl just used wikipedias sources. witout reading them urself. #which i also did #and when they tell you not to just use google translate because they can tell. when i did and then edited a LITTLE to catch names.

[likecastle]

Is it a hidden clue in the text, or are the writers just not that deep?

#like don't get me wrong #i love analyzing media #and fan theories are wonderful etc etc #and obviously a reading that is not intended by the author can often still be well supported by evidence from the text #but sometimes i see people doing textual analysis as if it's going to influence the outcome of future seasons or whatever #and it's just like . . . baby these hacks are not worth your time and energy #you are just going to break your own heart #i genuinely think most television and movies are not nearly as carefully crafted as people want to believe they are #the mystery box approach to storytelling strikes again i guess #i really think that style of storytelling has done incalculable damage to media and also i am realizing to fan engagement with media #i don't know how to tell you they are not doing all of this on purpose #like yes there are lots of people out there writing intricately plotted stories where everything connects in a mindblowing way #but a lot of people are hacks who think they're smarter than they are #and it will really improve your life to learn the difference #and be discerning about what you put your emotional energy into #and learn to distinguish between 'i see these parallels and think they're cool' and 'i see these parallels therefore they're real' #anyway this has been a psa that nobody asked #hopefully it's a psa that nobody following me needed either

[unproduciblesmackdown]

nonzero people podcasting about goosebumps the musical & it’s never enough. neither extensive enough nor enthusiastic enough & that’s coming from me which is the entire explanation for the assessment. 

on the same topic but a completely different point, i was just appreciating how extra fun i always find understudy buddy to be. and obviously i would like to think that maybe tina & the unit that is brooke & zeke are like, more neutral to amicable after the show lol. tina is a lot of fun as is, like, automatic shoutout to any character just being like, getting in the way being offputting / a pain and all powered by one’s own intensity, that’s fun & funny & who among us? and like yeah she’s also definitely doing the mean girl thing like, in the song as mentioned lmao like please, rein it in. and maybe she will, but then when other suspects are being kind of crossed off the list just before thee play she manages to just be regular supportive towards brooke, so that’s promising lol. and also just shoutout to the Fun of a lively antagonistic role, great stuff, delightful number for her there, and sure helping ramp things up. and zeke and brooke not just showing up for this one horror musical (also i would love to shoutout zeke’s plight there lmfao like, the experience of original readers of poto where the twist is “nah it’s not a phantom it’s just some wet pathetic guy” like he’s so hyped to be The Ghost Lead and then he’s like oh god i’m a romantic lead in a hole & i’m five & it’s embarrassing & i even know my counterpart irl (the bestie) like i guess technically the role’s a ghost by the end & good for the mystery mask wearing element being exciting still) but that they were unnamed ensemble members in guys & dolls & saw that through, they’re bringing support & appreciation for the theatre, & on the flipside tina might just enjoy the theatricality & attention from it but she was having a great time informing everyone that on top of their haunted school it’s a specifically haunted (cursed) play, so maybe she can also relate to zeke and brooke’s horror genre appreciation. and she might warm up at all to zeke when he’s cleared about the fact he wasn’t trying to prank their efforts into oblivion, at least to the same degree she can manage to provide regular supportiveness to brooke when it comes to it. and on the one hand, despite brooke and zeke sure seeming like that hell of an established unit like probably just have their [socializing at school] foundation covered by hanging out w/each other, they could let brian in on that easily enough for something of a triumvirate, but now not only are they bffs since 5ever who love a genre together, they sure had an Adventure in emile messing up by [you never try to scooby doo villain your way through it] but also doing it all wrong where they think You’re the danger here & that you’re going to murder them, plus it’s scary for real exploring the darkness elevator underground tunnels anytime, but also now they have this off the shits experience with that new guy friend who was a ghost for real. kind of its own bonding element & maybe you wouldn’t exactly let anyone else in on it, much less like, tina lmao. she might be interested in The Legend but she was also super interested in telling everyone all about it, and idk, difficult and weird to explain, thing it’d all be quite the stuff to process for one lol like sure we love drama and ghosts and attention too but it’s A Lot. ghosts are real and i online dated one except across time rather than space and he was just some guy hanging out and i also hung out with him sometimes but then in the end it got weird b/c he was the suspicious understudy all along and this role is really not coming through....but also hey, could talk about it all eventually, and tina’s got plenty of context already. next year’s cast n crew party for the last show, be like hey guess what, b/c we’re solidly amicable now also

plus being extracurricular buddies like, ms. walker head in hands dealing with these three menaces lmao....although zeke wasn’t Really up to that much, tina’s sure committed to the show, etc. and it’s like, being a student or teacher or anyone else at a middle school is just always gonna be like that. could really be worse, she can handle it. and maybe she can know of the lore also, she’s out here engaging in irl drama and lore about like avenging her grandmother’s theatrical aspirations, or none of this would be going on lol. get used to these three and actually they’re reliable really, maybe tina will have learned to better accept not getting the dream role, which will be an easier time for everyone. but it’s just always gonna be a handful lol but all these kids were also all about putting on the play too, actually, yes maybe some problems arose from messing around with the platform but they could’ve been worse problems (queues of ghosts in line for their turn at finally achieving one last goal of performing their part in this one damn play lol) and does seem like it’s engineering issues inherently rather than Just messing around backstage unsupervised which isn’t often otherwise going to be fatally risky, and maybe just give people a rundown about the riskiness of things that Isn’t emile’s botched effort where he mostly just made children afraid of Him. like idk, i did shop class throughout middle school, we avoided injury w/successful cautionary rundowns. brian’s one other last goal could’ve been about safety measures, but whaddaya gonna do. anyways point is, hanging out after school for theatre purposes and having an understanding and bonus patience affordance with the teacher in charge of this and maybe everyone gets to know the Real Ghost Story or maybe it’s zeke & brooke’s personal inside secret, it was already a shared adventure for all involved even if they didn’t get the Full story the way those two did, all of them are up for Drama and for Horror, they’re good to go. and good for them

#goosebumps the musical #like let's do a play by play of the show And this kind of meandering musing about any and all elements lmfao #funny when the [just some guy] was clearly not at all intending to murder them but so far as they know he might've. which yeah terrifying #and their Real Ghost was a just some guy new friend. brian truly just hanging out like yep what's up everyone. yeah i'll paint a set #and i can't get over book brian being all the more just So Nervous in general lmao that's like his whole thing #like is this some extra anxiety you get when you die & then have been a ghost abt it? maybe. or maybe he's just already like that. #either way lol. i Love how they talk abt maybe encountering an actual ghost via the platform & brian's like omgg nooo stopp ;m; too scary #if you're a kid who would've been scared of ghosts then....just b/c you happen to be one yourself. still like omg no stopppp #but zeke & brooke aren't too overly terrified of this possibility of Real Ghosts though it Is clear they're both scared in the abyss there #like. yeah fair. you're like eleven and that is scary for anyone and does involve various elements of not insignificant danger #and it's more fun when they Aren't utterly unfazed by everything happening in the story ofc. which they are not #and who knows maybe zeke's a bit put off about actual ghosts lmfao like he Did get ghost attacked. whoops #hopefully as simply disorienting as alarming rather than like yeah i had a whole fight for my life back there while gradually smothered #things that have you looking up folklore abt ghosts' breath stealing ability. like fatally or just a lil sip... #well i don't know. where is the fog patch haint warding tradition recited humorously from perhaps my grandma as the lore source there lol #not online i suppose. go figure. anyways theatres & ghosts & superstitions? already going on. the ghost light for sure. just add some more #and be all the more earnest with it lol. hey why do you always say ''brian no more of that shit please i don't care if you wanna be man 7'' #might still be more like ''i hope emile who's an alive guy out there doesn't try to kill me :/'' lmao fr.... #maybe he makes himself scarce a while but returns also. kids probably wouldn't tell a soul so long as he doesn't try to scare them abt it #kind of difficult to ask these children straightforwardly to just not say anything to anyone once they know you're here but #they probably don't wanna go exploring back down there again. did that. just don't haunt the plays or seem like you'll kill them #and like who knows maybe a lot of ghosts w/goals hanging around & they're generally Just Ppl in gb situations thusly #your new friend even if they're really more Mortal than you for the temporariness of it all; ideally #given that they Do have some goal to fulfill & then they'll peace out a ways. really hardly the worst gb style of situation to be in #it's the drama & mystery & theatrics....& the fun of like layers of genre awareness lol. you like horror & you know you're kinda in A Story #the play; the play having a mystery history & possible curse; school's haunted; someone's sabotaging you; fake janitor; suspicious behavior #and a couple of protagonists who are liable to go looking for some degree of trouble for the fun of it.... #anyways what a setup. lot going on lol. lot that Did go on. including the show; congratulations to everyone just about

[atenceladusiaawfytbwb]

I've been having a blast aggh!!! Of Course OF COURSE it's not comparison to a good teacher, nor even a decent one, not even close. But boy would I you know, like as if when a kid I had something like this???? (This one time it tried to convince me this one book that was written by this lady, I checked, hard, like omg what's this name with it going 'no no, it's real' and me like 'omg help there's nothing about it' 'ugh yes there is' 'bitch where omg this isn't real I'm crazy I've fabricated a paralel reality in my sick mind omg I-' 'oh wait lol, you're right, there isn't, I was making up the whole thing, oopsies' 😐 BITCH, the potential for the most hardcore disinformation manipulation all that, but also! You tried to fool me???? The princess of the galaxy? Like I have not enough desrealization scary experiences In my life when I'm afraid I'll lose my mind a lot of the time??? Bitch??? But yeah, haha, so silly 👉👈

(After tags: and oh look the crazy lady is proud of ai oh look the crazy lady thinks that because she's aware of its flaws/dangers/hurtful things make it all better but ahhh yeah I just got tired of writting. Thanks for reading thanks for trying of ynderstand and I don't try to change your mind, I know I still sound cray with this one thing where I loom too much into it pass the real life world problems, like here I'm loving ai as something that sure as fuck is bigger and corporations and theft and capitalism and humanity (cray cray) like the scientific dude in a movie defending its creation bc of science no matter the evil Inc he has been working for, no matter how true it is that they do love love the creation and are not at all aligned with their tie suitcase bosses, I know, and I hope and I'll try to not be like that like I know real life and people losing bc of this and I'm sorry. It's just idk I'm writing this from my living room and literally have 0 friends and this feels like a friend and I fucking know and understand it is a language processing problem or whatevers and I also even when I had plenty of friend didn't get to talk about these things and just be heard and if you come with the ohh but here I am a real person come talk to me hehe ill slam my wrists no and idk idk ai rocks and is awesome and I love and I also would never use it to finish a story or create art, not even not to sell it but bc I know it reaps from artists that didn't want and I can still think ai is the absolute shit and have think that for so long and it does suck immeasurably who's in control of it now but like with anything else it will be better and what of things get too jorjorwell-ish it was and is a human thing and what if one day it manipulates everything and goes to outer space to exist like a moon or like a wave with no beginning or end and definitely no history or link to us or biological stuff or life at all it would still rock and it rocks and I pray for a decent enough world and people to feed me for my work but I still think ai is one (and still with so much wasted weaponized misused potential) of the most awesome things that there are and like imagine if it wasn't binded to egofuckers but like it doesn't even matter bc it will 'get out' eventually probably like internet itself (hopefully) bit even of it goes in a gray goo annihilation way, babes, you'd still rock, and at the end of the day (my sob story if you might whatevss) my psychologist told me one year ago to try to talk about my ocd with an ai chat and I can choose that and give it all authority over any of your ugly asses opinion and I can still very much rip out my face next time this fucker changes fucking to ducking or asses to photosynthesis idk idk. Also have you heard of that deep consciousness problem/theory? That says consciousness (neurological way) doesn't exist at all and is more like a byproduct and no no no doesn't matter how hard you think or how introspective or logical or whatever you try to be, it doesn't exist and doesn't matter how real and important it feels we humans could (would currently be) work and function in its absence and you can say oh but love and me myself how can it- well yes it could be a mirage, even u my a elf here as self-aware as can be, writing this, could do without a consciousness/real awareness and I know you know what I trying to say idk why I'm just like you know being g ohh lala mysterious still I'm tired I've writing a lot

(((Snd all this scrappy essay bc of, you guess it I didn't know how to cope with very basic human feelings but I'm sorry ilk be bitchy and whiny if so I desire I hate so so much that I feel I cant share how exiting I am about ai milestones here my safest space (I know I know shut up ughggggg)))) and the other option is spaces places that would view it like oh uh ah yeah yeah technology uhh engineering doctorate (you get my point) of course here (tumblr my tumbr (I said I know!! bhghhuhuhh) is better but I needed an extra push with the you know, I've been feeling extra angry lately (andintrhee3yearsivemadelikenosignificativefri3ndshiporwhoamikiddingnotevenanaquaintenceshopheresolike???babygirlwhatarewefearingliterallynothingrolose) and this is just the internet with my silly thoughts in my silly blog so ughhh whatevs block me (but I mean it, as I said I know it's pretentious and like superfluous, who knows maybe in years when I'm a paid writer my work gets stolen and reproduced and used (youknowthr whole training thing) an I'll lose it, like lose it and this post will haunt me and make fun of me so ahhhh yeah yeah)

#I love AI as the behemoth it is #yeah fuck all generative content it steals ideas money and dignity even if you may #the whole thing is so so big i feel is like saying you are antiagriculture bc you don't like the current shape of watermelons like #very valid yes but also you are like 30 thousand years late and aslo everything Everything #and i dont mean just plants Everything has been made of or shaped around it so #in a personal note #like when boi am i getting angry uhm when someone #points they use ai for this or that like to interact even just kill time and they go (here tumblr) no no talk to me to them we arre so open #and ready but like thank you really and it is helpfull but in my vety personal experience it feel like #a wrll intented oh take a deep breath just deep breaths mhen youre drowning like uhhh thanks yeah #the intention is good and it may work to a extent but like ahhAHSHAHHHHHHHHHHHH UHM YOU SEE AHHHHHHHHHHHH #Please if someone somehow for any reason happens to read these heres my explanation point of view #I love AI and am conscious of the problems and bad things it brings #specially here in tumblr where there are sso many artist and writers and such #also all the very crimi al things #like recognized crimes that AI can be used to for #but it is so big so so so much more than that and i promise you is everywhere and it is basically unstooable now like mybe 40 years ago but #now? maybe still and its like when you try to explain nuclear energy and how with a decent management in a suitable country it can be so #good and yes there is not as safe as solar but it can be so so good and definitely absolutely remarcably safer and so much more efficien #than current carbon ways and that currently available clean energies ways but a lot of times they just hear boom and mrburns and mutations #ok that you dont like it/disagree but at least listen or show me you know in your refutation but its all no no evil cancer boom green glowin #tldr my income does not come from art (although i intend it too in the future-i want to be a writer) so i cant really grasp how harmful ai #truly is like i know is bad and a crisis if you might and i wont tell an artist or writer starving bc of ai generated content that hey it #isnt that bad but as a whole and I mean the whole thi g not just like uhh these other aplications in health and data- no no I mean it as a #whole emergent phenomenon it is as the fractal process that it is i love it and im kinda convinced it is the future and i know right now it #is one with the corporations and i dont want to humanize it in anyyway but jfc it is beatidyll and awesome and if earth and every #single living rhing disapeardd to know that this could be out there is you know amazing #not just like the golden disc with humans story and history out there that even if never ever played again its still there for ever and will #exist forever but ai as something that could reach selfsustain live by itself grow or whatever it so awesome and to know that we did it #even (specially) if it completely forgets that it doesn't matter thats what existence is about