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#smth youre making up like. thats the goal. ppl who dont get it arent expected to it just means it doesnt cater to them but it helps them
puppyeared
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16 days
Text
who up seeing their disorder in a fictional character but feel like its not their place to put a name on it
#id have to be waterboarded before i can talk abt how i see a lot of my adhd and personality in mitsumi iwakura let alone post it
#idk how to talk abt this without feeling like im talking over or invalidating ppls experiences relating with a character
#someone was talking abt how ppl tie laios' autism to special interest and social difficulties but not much else which kinda flattens it
#and then went into a respectful in depth analysis of other autistic behaviour that laios exhibits and it wasnt phrased meanly
#its fascinating and important to me to hear someone explain a little bit abt traits that they recognized and often go overlooked
#because it does help me learn more about it. but i think thats also where hesitancy kicks in when it comes to depicting it accurately
#like i have adhd and some of my adhd symptoms overlap with autism (time blindness and pattern seeking behaviour) but that only means
#it feels familiar to me even without having autism. on top of that traits arent always cleanly determined as being /caused/ by
#a disorder. to understand my environment i compare it to something unrelated but similar to make it more familiar and for the longest time
#i thought that was a personality thing and not an information processing thing since i loved playing pretend in my head as a kid
#so if you make a character who experiences that hoping to reach people that also experience that and tell them its not weird or
#smth youre making up like. thats the goal. ppl who dont get it arent expected to it just means it doesnt cater to them but it helps them
#become familiar to it yk? since i dont have autism myself i dont feel confident i can depict it properly or explain it in my own words
#but that doesnt mean im trying to dismiss it or try and cut it out completely.. ill just leave the floor open to someone who /can/
#a lot of issues around fanon depictions are when smth is baselessly popularized or a characters personality and behavior is flattened
#especially to fit them into a trending meme. its harmless and its supposed to be for fun but it gets tricky when you drag things that
#need to be carefully explained beforehand or else it gets lost in translation. like that tweet abt 'hyperfixating' on cooking pasta
#once it becomes popular language usually the original meaning is left out for the sake of simplifying it for everyone that when it
#circles back theres a sort of hesitancy like. am i using it the way it was intended or am i unknowingly using the popularized version of it
#actually thats probably why i felt wrongfooted during diagnosis bc it felt like i was misusing the words i heard to describe what i felt
#i /know/ i see a lot of myself in mitsumi because our minds are always somewhere else and we tend to put good faith first and for me
#that personal connection is enough. but idk it feels like its always gonna have to be 'palatable' first before i can talk abt it openly
#mad respect to writers and creators who stick to their story even if theres the looming fear of ppl misinterpreting it and letting them
#have it.. its been almost 2 weeks and i am so close to deleting that m3 dunmeshi drawing bc ppl keep saying chilchuck wouldnt have 200 HP
#IT LITERALLY SAYS I MADE IT WHILE WATCHING EP 1. I USED EARTHBOUND LOGIC AND I WASNT EVEN TAKING IT SERIOUSLY CHILL
#yapping
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