#this is how you’re supposed to write

[mummer]

just saw asteroid city last night, pls explain the proposed significance of the kiss!!

answering this publicly hope thats ok! cant do a readmore im on mobile *****asteroid city spoilers below beware*****

i dont remember anyones names so this is gonna sound partly unhinged. okay so the edward norton playwright and jason schwartzman actor (not character, in the black and white parts) are lovers right. tbh i thought this was kind of a gag and forgot about it. but later we find out that the playwright died 6 months into the production. i didnt make the connection that THAT’s why the actor-jason has to suddenly leave the stage and freaks out backstage about how he’s not sure he’s Doing it right. hes not talking about acting!! because he himself is literally grieving his lover while he’s playing a character who’s grieving his wife written by his lover so obviously it’s too much!!! actor-jason is trying to find meaning in his death through his writing but there isnt any meaning in death [gerris drinkwater voice] which is what the play is trying to say anyway. he doesnt think he’s performing grief right even in his own life!!! (and tbh it’s the 50s so he wouldnt be able to perform grief publicly anyway!!!!) the play starts with a car accident… anyone would search for some hidden meaning there, some sign…. so when he talks to margot robbie outside it’s not really about finding the CHARACTER’s motivations it’s about the actor himself being able to process the playwright’s death! and adrien brody director was probably also dealing with that too (him and norton seemed to be good buddies) so the whole “sleeping backstage” thing gets a bit sadder maybe? maybe everyone else got this in the theatre and im just stupid lol but crazy making stuff to me!!! the whole story is about sublimated gay grief that cannot be expressed?!?!

the tweet that caught me onto this was here which posits that the playwright’s death was a suicide but i think that’s pretty stupid and unnecessary because the whole thing about the play asteroid city is that death is random and meaningless. im pretty sure that’s what the alien represents— a shocking and absurd event that isnt outright evil or menacing, not something anyone can predict or make sense of, it’s just a thing that happens to you out of nowhere, it doesnt mean anything. he’s a little black figure, he’s death! giving and taking! aagh

#you’re the wife who played my actor :( #posthumus #asteroid city #imagine youre in love with a playwright and he writes a play before he even meets you about how you cant get over his death which hasnt #happened yet. id go insane too #im going to see it again to see how this informs the whole thing because its driving me crazy #rewatching the performances knowing that they're performing people performing. augh. #remember when bryan cranston accidentally appears in frame. rending my garments #also ‘you cant wake up until you fall asleep’ confused me a bit but then i remembered that the margot robbie scene was supposed to be put o #as a dream sequence and it makes sense now. thanks #aliens are the new fairytale monster symbol of death. the ultimate Unknowable #EDIT okay i read the wikipedia summary got some facts wrong adrien brody is sleeping in the theatre during rehearsals so its not because of #the playwright’s death he’s just like that.

[saltwatersweets]

i like to imagine that sometime in between ep7 and ep8, charlie takes vaggie to cannibal town to help train some of the residents who will fight in the upcoming extermination, and while visiting vaggie sees the kid she spared and maybe gets to have a proper conversation with him and/or his family

#i know that vaggie probably looks rather different than she did three+ years ago when she fell #but i definitely feel as though if you were a sinner who was about to be brutally stabbed by an angel #and then she Didnt Stab You #i think you’d be able to recognize her even if you’re fairly young #(also i know some people think that all the cannibals are hellborn but i believe that some are sinners and some are hellborn) #(this child being hellborn would make no sense because that means vaggie was kicked out for sparing a hellborn child) #(aka doing what she is legally supposed to do) #(so being a cannibal will probably get you into hell regardless of age) #also i really like the idea of vaggie and charlie getting to see the good that came out of her actions #assuming lute and adam didnt just go immediately kill the child she spared (it can be applied the extermination ended almost immediately #after vaggie fell given that you can see charlie walking around looking for injured sinners just a few minutes later so hopefully the #child survived) #then i like to believe the child ran home and got to tell the people who care for him that story #and maybe someone will even thank vaggie for her mercy #in a very strange way givennthat they are cannibals and all #think of a cat who kills mice and gives them to you. that’s probably how cannibals show love except with human limbs #anyways i want to write a one shot about this tbh #my post #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel vaggie #hazbin vaggie #hazbin hotel cannibal town #cannibalism #should probably tag that just in case lmfao #does this cannibal child have a name #im calling him #spared cannibal child #very very original and thoughtful name i know i know #hazbin hotel charlie #charlie morningstar

[tending-the-hearth]

people who put clarisse and luke on the same level and act like they should both be villainized in the same way and hated in the same way how does it feel to absolutely and completely misunderstand clarisse’s character

#people posting abt the show like “oh how am I supposed to hate clarisse with Dior playing her #YOU’RE NOT SUPPOSED TO HATE CLARISSE #I will write a thesis paper defending my girl istg #she is a TEENAGER who has to prove everything to her father #who was frustrated and angry #yes there’s not an excuse for her actions in the first book #BUT THAT WAS THE FIRST BOOK #like honestly how did people read sea of monsters/battle of the labyrinth and still hate her by last olympian #percy jackson and the olympians #clarisse la rue

[harumscarumcos]

I’m just happy to know no Disney/Disney adjacent films won for the sole fact they are Disney/Disney adjacent

Congrats to The Boy and the Heron on the Oscar win, still proud of each movie that ended up nominated in the section

#like I would’ve cried big tears for ATSV or Nimona to have won #but still proud of them being nominated yknow? #oscars #oscars 2024 #also no shade to elemental I do think it’s a nice film #I just know when it comes to the academy’s history #if not for the years of prior backlash they definitely would’ve chosen it because of that leg up of being a disney/pixar feature #and I still think a lot of the movies in the category this year just had more weight to their stories than elemental did tbh #I really liked the themes of the boy and the heron on creating a better world with your own hands #a vision of optimism that’s so desperately needed while still acknowledging like the unfortunate/bleak status of the world #I was really hopeful for nimona cause of the message served there too #of how history/empires can so greatly twist a narrative #of spurning the world around because of treatment received so long ago and finding acceptance in the unlikeliest place #of coming up from the mud to become something greate spiting all those who spoke down on you #and I don’t think yall need to hear me gas up atsv again for the narrative #but you know imma stand on the fact of not walking in the path others think you’re supposed to and writing your own story #in spite of all your nay sayers #I think honestly there were a lot of great picks this year

[yaminerua]

I once read a soulmate AU for a different fandom where the way the connection eventually manifested was that whatever someone wrote or drew on their own skin, it would transfer to their soulmate’s. And I was thinking of the applications of it for Rimster given that time Rimmer resorted to scrawling revision notes on his arms and legs.

Like, Lister’s probably used to occasionally seeing some exam notes and other things pop up on his skin from time to time given how often Rimmer takes exams but usually it’s been within relatively normal boundaries. He’s not gonna judge. He doesn’t know much about the person on the other end of their inked connection but he hopes with all the tests they seem to take that they’re doing well. Sometimes he’ll even scrawl a little ‘good luck!’ on himself as a kind of encouragement to them.

The very first time something like this happens, Rimmer freaks out. Because oh holy smeg he has a soulmate! There’s someone out there for him! A real honest to god person!! Meant for him!! All the years of his brothers teasing him, acting like the universe would just skip bothering to assign him one, are washed away to be replaced by an initially heart-bursting glow of elation, but it’s followed swiftly by a deep-seated dread. Because oh god anything he writes on himself will be seen by this other person. What if he smegs the whole thing up!? He’s already caught their attention with his revision scrawlings, he’s going to have to tone it down to something that won’t be off-putting…

Fast forward and Lister has joined the Red Dwarf crew and it’s like any other day. He’s left his annoying bunkmate to stew in pre-exam nerves and he’s out and about on the ship, maybe trying to flirt with some of the lady officers when suddenly he notices his hand rapidly becoming covered in words, scrawled in a panicked frenzy, first across his palm, then the back of his hand and down onto the forearm. And yeah, sure, this has happened before, it’s no big deal. Except this is the most chaotic it’s ever been, especially since it’s now trailing right up his arm and if he doesn’t get out of public view people are going to notice.

So he runs back to the bunk room, hoping to grab a jacket or something to cover it up but he freezes as soon as he’s half-pulled it on because he spots Rimmer. Smeghead Supreme, Arnold Judas Rimmer, sitting with a textbook on his lap and his shirt sleeve rolled up, utterly engrossed in his pre-exam stress-induced frenzy of copying as much of the text from the book onto his own skin as possible.

The realisation hits like a truck and Lister cannot believe it. He refuses to. It’s gotta be a coincidence. Rimmer wouldn’t be the only person in the universe cramming for an exam, surely! Just because he is doesn’t mean what he’s writing is the same as what’s still being hurriedly scrawled up the inside of his left arm. The universe wouldn’t play that cruel a trick on him! Surely!

Rimmer hasn’t even noticed him come in and he’s muttering out loud each word as he copies it out from the book and Lister can only watch in horror as he sees the exact same words blossom across his own skin and oh this CANNOT be happening!!

So now you have Lister knowing that the universe has somehow, bizarrely, chosen to pair him up with Rimmer, and Rimmer blissfully unaware of the fact that the soulmate he’s yearned for his whole life is the lazy gimboid who just interrupted his revision by tossing an unwashed shirt at his head.

#Rimmer becoming a hologram after the leak makes the AU a bit odd bc why would it still work on him in that form #but suspending disbelief and allowing it to happen that way allows for some fun stuff #where Rimmer is bemoaning the fact he never got to find out who his soulmate was supposed to be and Lister is there awkwardly like oh boy… #last two people in the universe and they’re soulmates and he still hates the idea but it’s really starting to look like it was always meant #to happen this way so he grabs a pen and writes Smeghead on his arm and Rimmer watches in HORROR #just absolute horror and then he goes full on into denial like no this isn’t right #it can’t have been you the whole time! You’re a man (he’ll figure out how he feels about that later) and also I’d have known if it was you! #he tries to convince himself the universe just reassigned them each other bc they’re the only two left #but lister has to reluctantly tell him about the exam revision notes and that he knew it was Rimmer since before the accident #also this only works in ur own dimension so Lister writing on himself will only show on his Rimmer but not Ace bc Ace has his own back home #But it means that lister is able to confirm that it’s HIS Rimmer returning from being Ace by seeing the text he writes appear on his skin #Rimster #Or it could happen during the exam where Rimmer has his I Am A Fish breakdown #lister just sees I am a fish appear on his arm repeatedly and only finds out later #when he gets told about Rimmer’s exam incident #red dwarf

[secretmellowblog]

Random, but. It’s fascinating how “Valjean and Javert written by someone who thinks cops are Good” is so radically different from “Valjean and Javert written by someone who thinks cops are Bad.”

Like, for me the number one Thing that will determine whether I enjoy someone’s take on Valjean and Javert are whether they realize that the police/prison as an institution destroyed both of their lives, and is the villain of both of their stories XD.

But yeah it’s really fascinating! Both in adaptations and in fanfiction, the tone/interpretation with which the plot beats are handled can change so much about the characterization. All the adaptations/fic start off with the same basic plot beats but so much can be changed and colored (for better or worse) by the way the author chooses to interpret them

#i do want to say that I always think more people in the fandom is fun! #and fanfic is supposed to be whatever self indulgent stuff scratches your id and can’t be held to the same standards as published stuff #I will never tell people what to write! #also I’ve got cringe fanfic on ao3 too (let he who is without cringe cast the first stone etc etc) #so I’d be the WORST person to preach about that XD #(the next part in the tags is a joke don’t come at me) #but— as a lighthearted joke— sometimes to me personally the Les mis fandom feels like #imagine if you’re in the fandom for the new she ra show #and the show’s about the Evil Horde and how it destroys the lives of the two main characters in different ways #but then like? half the fandom insisted on referring to it as the Morally Okay Reformable Horde #and then like. all the catra/adora fanfic ended with Catra realizing she needs to be a Nicer horde soldier #and maybe adora rejoins the horde to and they go off to fight for Justice (which is what the horde does) #and then you were like ‘huh that’s a bit odd’ #‘I thought the point was that the horde poisoned both of their lives and ripped them away from their friends/family’ #‘like I thought the evil horde was evil and stuff’ #and people responded to you ‘why do you hate catra and catradora?’ #and you were like ‘no I love catra! but I thought the whole point was that yknow. she kinda had to leave the evil horde and all’ #‘like her upbringing in the horde had left her with a violent self-destructive authoritarian worldview and all’ #‘and her obsession with being a good horde soldier was not indeed a good admirable thing but sorta pathetic and sad’ #‘and adora was right to leave and hate the horde for what it did to her’ #‘and her flaw was that (like catra) she still internalized a lot of the way it taught her to view herself’ #‘and the whole fun of catradora is the idea of the two of them sorta finally figuring out who they are outside of that abusive system’ #anyway in this metaphor catra is javert adora is Valjean the horde is the police catradora Is valvert XD #this is a goofy metaphor made after hours of homework and is not to be taken too seriously

[thatone-churro]

i was gonna make this addition to someone else’s post but it got longer than expected and i really didn’t wanna do that to them after they said they were done talking about it in regards to their own work.

i don’t know if “bugs” or “irks” are quite the right words for how i feel, but this take certainly does something of the sort to me.

i hate that the concept of “bury your gays” and its related discourses are so quickly applied to ALL queer media. it’s completely stripped of its original context/meaning and i know THAT irks me to no end.

personally, i’m of a mind that queers deserve media about them, about queers, and also about tragedy, death, murder, action and suspense, or whatever the occasion is. it can be about the queer cast while not having a happy ending, or without the cast being perfect.

“casually queer” is how i used to describe my personal project. yes, it’s blatantly and unapologetically queer, and that queerness is important, but it’s not the focus of the story. it’s not the point of the story. there’s still action, still adventure, still death, still tragedy. the cast isn’t perfect, some die, some are awful, some are “problematic,” even the queer cast. most things happen to the queer cast, because most of the major cast is queer.

i don’t understand the idea of condemning a work for “problematic queer characters” if it’s just a primarily queer work. you can’t have a queer story with no conflict or have realistic characters that are perfect. you want a queer story, but no, no, the queer characters can’t be problematic. and the problematic trait they describe is simply just. a character flaw exploited for the sake of the narrative. i don’t get it.

a queer story written for queers shouldn’t be perfect and pure. there should be “problematic” things. there should be tragedy. they shouldn’t have to be pure. they shouldn’t have to be perfect. they shouldn’t be shunned by the community they were created for because they told an otherwise typical story, except now it’s queer. queer stories, or any story, should be allowed to be complex. there should be nuance. not everything in it should be likable. that’s how a story works.

using my story as an example, again, my all-time favorite character and one of my main protagonists for a good chunk of it is a nonbinary lesbian on ace-spectrum. okay. cool. lots of rep there. but they’re heavily flawed. they kill. they have regrets. they make stupid decisions. they’re self-righteous. they’re terrified of being the bad guy yet end up the bad guy in many people’s views. they have one very violent motive. they love their family to such an extent that they’ll destroy anyone who lays a hand on them. they’re complex. they’re nuanced. they’re not always the good guy. that’s how a story is. if they were a perfect, pure, “perfect” character, there would be no story. no enjoyable story, at least.

what baffles me the most is when queer creators make these queer stories and suddenly they’re a bad queer because they killed one of their many queer characters, for instance. i’ll use my project once more for an example. say, remember that nonbinary ace lesbian from less than a paragraph ago? yeah, i ended up killing them at one point. their story was over and while it hurt me, too, it was a necessary step for the story. their story was over and i needed them to start the next chapter of the next protagonists’ story. but as a nonbinary ace lesbian myself, does that make me a “bad queer?” am i suddenly evil if i killed off my sapphic couple that got marrie in the first part because their story was over and there was no other way to move on their daughter’s story with them there? am i the asshole for killing one of my ace characters for a narrative purpose? am i not allowed to do certain things to my queer characters anymore if i don’t want to be a “bad queer?”

i guess these feelings boil down more to how strictly puritan culture and/or cancel culture and/or “problematic” culture has invaded the literary scene and how that impacts me, a queer writer. how are we supposed to tell these stories that people beg for if they are torn down and torn apart for the exact nuances they want? how are we supposed to create anything without relentless scorn or fear of being “cancelled” for thematic complexities? i don’t understand it.

in conclusion:

i realize my opinion on the subject is probably HEAVILY swayed by my own tastes and preferences and i have no idea where i’m going with this anymore and there’s not really an argument here anymore so really this whole thing can be taken with a grain of salt.

anyway, that’s my angry rant for the day. please don’t witch hunt me for it, thanks 🤞

#do you people understand how exhausting this gets for queer creators. do you. #when you’re so quick to get up in arms with pitchforks and torches how are we supposed to create? #‘i want more complex queer stories! no wait not like that.’ what are we supposed to do. #how can we create when those creations are shunned and when we (as queer creators) get ‘cancelled’ for it #do you understand. do you get what this does to your own community. #you can’t want more from us when you openly reject what we put out. #i’m so fucking tired of this as a queer writer. i’m so tired. #someone can probably explain this in a nicer/more formal way but i’ve already written two essays this week i’m not writing another for this #grace being kinda serious for once #text post #lgbtq #lgbtqia #lgbtq community #literature #what do i tag this?? #lgbtq creators #discourse #< i guess #long post

[mariathechosen1]

It’s honestly so amazing to me how viewers sorta grow desensitized to certain types of sadness in storytelling and stop showing characters sympathy because of it.

A fictional character could explain to me how they watched their parents die when they were 10 and then later got adopted, only for their new adopted parents to be killed, and I’ll think ‘god, what a cliche’.

But then that same show could go “Hey, you know that one character you like? What if the other characters forgot his birthday?” And I’ll burst into tears.

#fandom studies #writing #writeblr #sympathy is such a cool writing concept I think about it daily #like- when does someone go from being sad (sympathetic) to whiny (unsympathetic) #when is someone evil (/pos) and when is someone evil (/neg)? #there are so many factors at play and it’s really fascinating #I’m also just especially sensitive to all tropes involving forgotten birthdays #idk there’s just something especially sad about the people around you fucking up the one (1) day where you’re supposed to be the focus #no matter how much of a societal construct it is yk? #because once that day has passed #it’s passed yk? #you’ll have to wait until next year before celebrating #tw death #tw dead parent #maria talks about things #mariacore

[vacantgodling]

one of the many “rules of writing” that i see floating around this website and the internet in general that i fucking loathe is that you shouldn’t “spell out” accents. like it’s somehow better to write

“That will do you in!” He yelled in a southern accent.

versus

“That’ll do ya in!” He hollered.

like what in general pisses me off is that these are such. idk the right word for it but it’s so sterilized. i’m so tired of writing as a craft being held to a standard that it has to be prim and proper and beheld to certain rules and standards to be good. writing is a creative outlet and words are toys—do whatever the fuck you want with them. spell out accents, overuse italics and bold and em dashes and underlines. write like you want someone to fucking feel something because that’s the point.

#ren hot cakes #talking #i was thinking about how their eyes are watching god is written in time accurate aave and got irritated #that there’s someone out there who thinks that book should’ve been written in a more standardized way #writing is supposed to take you places and how people speak is a way of feeling that you’re there #i’m tired of writing having so many rules of what you should and shouldn’t do #finger paintings are just as valuable an art piece as those made with a palette and brush #not even tryna start discourse i just feel ways about things

[mumblesplash]

i genuinely don’t know if this is a stupid question but i’m getting conflicting reports so now i’m curious:

#for some reason i assumed writing in italics was something everyone could do #but some of the people i’ve asked have been like??? i do not control the letters #so idk #like you just. you simply oblique it. surely that’s a thing everyone’s got on them #but also maybe the rule about how you’re supposed to underline instead of italicizing when writing by hand is bc people can’t always do it? #also i didn’t add this as a caveat bc it didn’t seem too important but re: the writing in reverse thing #i do it with my off hand #like #you just have all the instructions for writing forwards and you flip it around the y axis of your own body yk #mumbling

[steellotus54]

So i’m looking back at my drafts and am greeted with this:

??? will this even work?

I have a strong feeling that something will break if actually press the button. Realistically, probably not. Eh, someone else can test it.

#what do i even tag this as #this is my third post i have no idea what i’m doing #also hi sorry for post jumpscare for the like. 5 of you following me. #i’m not dead! just writing my pinned. #it’s taking way too long #for no reason #and i’ve been busy lately #this is how you’re supposed to use tags right

[reformedmercymain]

God blizzard political lore has the worsssst depictions/analogies of literally any type of conflict or oppression ever. Like you can’t even try to have a nuanced discussion about a single characters ideology (let alone a group of them) because the entire thing is too much of a mess

#like I can’t even begin get into ramattra’s like ‘beliefs’ in the overwatch universe like holy shit I wish blizz would hit the reset button #on ALL lore and have someone rework the same general character ideas into a world that isn’t… what it is #‘these robots are an oppressed group of second class citizens and how they’re treated is wrong’ #while also going ‘these robots are also enemies and active terrorists that you’re supposed to fight’ #I hate blizzard for a lot of things but holy shit their writing is atrocious #overwatch is the first blizz game I’ve ever played but afaik this is how all of their writing is #blizzard. hire me. I’m not a writer but if you give me a reset button I can fix this. sorta. #c talks

[deathxproof-archive]

Also have a fun little life update since it’s 8 AM (the time it is everywhere in the world right now) and I haven’t slept and my partner’s work alarm is going off—

Graduated from college in 2020(sad party popper noise). Studied theatre, visual arts, art history. Emmett Timeline OUT. Andrew Rose Timeline IN.

Started testosterone and changed my name AGAIN in 2020. Got FUCKING medicated.

Worked as a manager for FuckBucks for a few years, as I feel is a valid post-theatre-degree job, many arts graduates would agree.

Started an art business that’s currently on hiatus(for moving reasons). Made a few zines. Still doing that. Had a fun pagan spiritual awakening.

Saw My Chemical Romance and The Mountain Goats within a week of each other and came out a changed man(-adjacent).

Started dating my best friend from high school and we moved to our dream city with my college roommate, my cat, and my partner’s snake the week before I turned 25.

Moved from the mountains to the ocean with a brief(lol) stint in eastern Massachusetts suburbia(read:hell).

Quit smoking cigarettes. Started smoking cigarettes again. We grow and quit again, save for when heavy drinking is involved(read: rarely).

Working at a cool artsy downtown cafe with cool artsy people!! My partner works with vampires!! Dipping my toes into theatre again(slowly)(very slowly)(literally just got this job and don’t know how to schedule that around theatre schedules)(we learn and adapt).

I picked up my Doctor Who writing fixation like an old long-untouched sketchbook full of familiar-ish art that I want to sketch over, finish unfinished pieces, and try my hand at redoing old work in a not-very-changed style. I want to write old muses like I redo character designs.

I picked up my general Doctor Who hyperfixation and slammed it against a wall like a wet teddy bear for the satisfying sound it makes.

And I am, perhaps, actually, legitimately, most importantly, the happiest I’ve been in my 25 long and short years on planet earth.

(The Brainworms for the Master & the Doctor [both separate & together entities] never went away. The Brainworms for everyone else came back with a vengeance.)

#if you’re like ‘wait what about the RYKER timeline’ then gods help you. that boy (name) has been good and gone for years now #but I suppose I’ll be impressed if you remember me specifically from Ryker #and I’ll probably reblog this a couple times bc it’s force of habit #my personal blog doesn’t get this update they all know this shit (kind of) #overtired oversharing on the internet timeeeeee #ooc #sorry I’m rambling now #gonna get lost in the tag sauce #don’t you love when you’re writing a life update for your dead rp blog for rp ghost town (affectionate) and realize. stunningly. HEY. wait. #I’m fucking. happy now. I’m fucking content now. shit’s still rocky with the move. but this is like. oh my god. oh my fucking god. #love coming to the realization (as if it hasn’t hit yet) that I am So Fucking Lucky and Soso Happy. how did that happen. #maybe it was the vampires.

[lithopsy]

the kids don’t know how to engage in fandom anymore

#606.txt #had an insane experience today when i tweeted about a fandom trend being annoying #and got dogpiled by a bunch of teens (that i did not even follow too like??) #saying that that annoying behavior is their hobby/how they engage in fandom #and i’m like hey i also love being annoying i didn’t think the tweet was that serious #but if you love a franchise you’re supposed to idk? write fanfic about it #or make art or share commentary or make memes or whatever #like. engage in fandom!! #but the kids are truly just sitting on twitter arguing over who likes x character more #anyway i hate you mysmetwt i really do

[beanie-twink]

This time I got some sleeping at last recs for you!

Before I started compiling them I was convinced that it was mostly gonna be angst again, but honestly? I think this might have the highest amount of happy songs (4/7) I’ve recced you so far lmao

1. Mercury

→ we’re still gonna start with the angst tho

→ at first I was gonna say this feels a lot like anthony post leaving smosh…

but honestly? 

I really feel like it fits both of them pretty well during that time

“Rows of houses sound asleep

Only street lights notice me

I am desperate if nothing else

In a holding pattern to find myself”

“I talk in circles, I talk in circles

I watch for signals, for a clue

How to feel different, how to feel new

No one can unring this bell

Unsound this alarm, unbreak my heart new

God knows, I am dissonance

Waiting to be swiftly pulled into tune”

“I'll go anywhere you want, anywhere you want

Anywhere you want me”

(-> doesn’t really fit that time, but it still hits so hard with them imo)

“I know the further I go

The harder I try, only keeps my eyes closed

And somehow I've fallen in love

With this middle ground at the cost of my soul”

-> this part being about why Anthony left smosh and also kind of feeling like Ian "betrayed" a part of their soul by being willing to stay even though the content wasn't as good/connected to them as it used to be

(like obvi he doesn't think that way anymore, but I am soooo curious about what will be in that letter and I feel like it could be something along those lines)

2. North

→ literally their journey through the years 

-> like from the start of building smosh until the rekindling and working together again

“We will call this place our home

The dirt in which our roots may grow

Though the storms will push and pull”

“We’ll tell our stories on these walls

Every year, measure how tall

And just like a work of art”

“A little broken, a little new

We are the impact and the glue

Capable of more than we know

We call this fixer upper home”

“With each year, our color fades

Slowly, our paint chips away

But we will find the strength

And the nerve it takes

To repaint and repaint and repaint every day”

→ especially this part is so!!!

“Smaller than dust on this map

Lies the greatest thing we have:

The dirt in which our roots may grow

And the right to call it home”

3. East

→ both of them reminiscing on the past and when they first started creating videos together

“I set out to rule the world

With only a paper shield and a wooden sword

No mountain dare stand in my way”

“My kingdom towers above it all

While I sleep safe and sound in my cardboard walls”

“Now I bear little resemblance to the king I once was

I bear little resemblance to the king I could become

Maybe paper is paper, maybe kids will be kids

Lord, I wanna remember how to feel like I did”

4. West

→ Ian’s POV both during the “between years” and I also kinda see it as him reassuring Anthony that they will work things out together

“Maps stretched out

Too many miles to count

Let's just say we're inches apart

And even closer at heart”

“Another pin pushed in

To remind us where we've been

And every mile adds up

And leaves a mark on us

And sometimes our compass breaks

And our steady true north fades”

-> just the idea of both of them kind of thinking of the other as their compass/the person that gives them a sense of direction in life

-> and back to vidcon also as a reference to Ian loosing his "magnifying glass"

“We'll be just fine

I just know we will”

“Time moves slow

When half of your heart has yet to come home

Every minute's adding up

And leaving a mark on us

I can't get you out of my mind

I solemnly that I'll never try”

(I am so normal about the last part of this song, I swear! *sobs*)

5. I'll keep you safe

→ again, them reconnecting and deciding to create videos together again 

“I'll keep you safe

Try hard to concentrate

Hold out your hand

Can you feel the weight of it?

The whole world at your fingertips”

“Don't be, don't be afraid

Our mistakes, they were bound to be made

But I promise you I'll keep you safe”

“You are an artist

But your heart is your masterpiece

And I'll keep it safe”

“As you build up your collection

Of pearls that you pulled from the deep

A landscape more beautiful

Than anything that I've ever seen”

→ this part just reminds me a lot of the whole sun/magnifying glass conversation as well, if that makes sense? 

6. Light

→ the reconnection, mainly through Anthony’s POV; except for the orange line which was literally Ian when Anthony left

“May these words be the first to find your ears

The world is brighter than the sun now that you're here

Though your eyes will need some time to adjust

To the overwhelming light surrounding us”

“I'll give you everything I have

I'll teach you everything I know

I promise I'll do better

I will always hold you close

But I will learn to let you go

I promise I'll do better

I will soften every edge

I'll hold the world to its best

And I'll do better

With every heartbeat I have left

I will defend your every breath

And I'll do better”

“Cause you are loved, you are loved more than you know

I hereby pledge all of my days to prove it so”

7. Seven

→ I listen to the album this is on a lot but somehow this song always slipped past me before

→ but in connection with Ianthony?? hits so good istg

→ the final and (imo) happiest song on this list 

→ literally them right now, just being so excited about being best friends and working on smosh videos again <3

→ especially Anthony’s POV (mostly fueled by all the vidcon content)

“How nice it'd be if we could try everything

I'm serious, let's make a list and just begin

"What about danger?" So what? "What about risk?"

Let's climb this mountain before we cross that bridge!”

“'Cause I'm restless

For whatever comes next”

“How wonderful to see a smile on your face

It costs farewell tears for a welcome home parade

A secret handshake between me and my one life 

( →  them just doing the friendship high-five over and over again)

I'll find the silver lining no matter what the price”

“'Cause I'm hungry

For whatever comes next”

“But I want to be here

Truly be here

To watch the ones that I love bloom

And I want to make room

To love them through and through and through

And through the slow and barren seasons too

I feel hope Deep in my bones

Tomorrow will be beautiful”

“And I'm ready

Restless and hungry

For whatever comes next”

Honourable mentions: 

(As in not accurate enough for a whole song analysis for them, but some of the vibes are there) 

(These two especially leaning more towards the anxiety that Anthony has talked about) 

Neptune 

Pluto

Always gotta start with angst also I HAVE NEVER HIT TAG LIMIT B4 THIS IS WHAT YOUR RECS DID TO ME

#mercury ruined me #wallpaper-inside-my-heart you’ve done it again #‘I’ll go anywhere you want me’ and I’m supposed to be sane #‘the harder I try only keeps my eyes closed’ makes me think of like them trying so hard to make it work back then but not realizing #That they need to grow apart for a little #so like that part is like Ian #ALL OF NORTH IS SO THEM REBUILDING #can I just say east starts out so good that piano medley is so beautiful #EAST IS SO EARLY SMOSH CODED #AND….'the years wore on and changed my heart' is how they changed while making smosh and how Anthony lost sight of that start #‘we’ll be just fine’ in west oh okay I’m losing my mind #even just the title of ‘I’ll keep you safe’ is enough to make me lose it personally #Anthony being like no we can do it we can create again!!! and showing Ian when they have that first writing session #‘don’t be afraid’ SHUT UP RN. #not a single hehehe moment in the building rn #DARKNESS REWRITTEN BY THEIR REUNION. #‘your heart is a masterpiece’ my god please I’m gonna fall to my knees #‘the world is brighter than the sun now that you’re here’…I need therapy rn #‘I promise I’ll do better’ STOP?!?!?!? #‘I will soften every edge’ Anthony when he let go and stopped being bitter and angry #‘your eyes will need time to adjust’ bc they spent so much time apart #GIVE YOU EVERYTHING I HAVE. #OP PLEASE #DEFENDING EVERY BREATH. #YOU ARE LOVED?!)/&:&/@2 #you connecting the part in seven to the handshake IM SICK #THE WELCOME HOME PARTJSKAJSJSJD #‘I want to be here truly be here’ good fucking bye #literally Anthony #ianthony song recs

[pebblesmustard]

When the writing fairies hit (kinda):

#i thought i hit a breakthrough with one of the main backstories #so much so that it made me light a candle and get out the notebook #so i’m not at square one anymore at least! #i’m actually at square two and way more confused about this story than i was three months ago #that’s how this writing thing is supposed to go right? #making yourself more confused the more you think you’re unraveling plot points? right? #r—right guys?