#thinking a lot of thoughts

[jeanivere]

arthur morgan tiddies and tummy thats all im gonna say

#my art #arthur morgan #rdr2 arthur #arthur morgan rdr2 #rdr2 #red dead redemption 2 #man i have so many feelings about him #thinking a lot of thoughts #like that happy trail im currently staring at #no im not i gotta go guys bye

[bunn13z]

i hate that i want everyone to like me all the time. i want to reblog stuff about the kink i am exploring but i’m worried that people won’t like it. like i don’t even know how many followers i have and i use this blog as like a diary, but i still want everyone who follows and sees my posts to like everything i post. why am i catering to an audience when this blog doesn’t exist for one ?????

men and minors dni

#thinking a lot of thoughts #part of it might be internalized stigma around the kink #it doesn’t help that my irl friends make fun of it and i have to play along #anyways #i might reblog a post or two and see if everyone hates me or not #men dni #minors dni #sapphic nsft #wlw nsft #lesbian nsft #nblw nsft #wlnb nsft

[fob4ever]

pete and patrick on zane lowe 18.1.23

patrick: “there’s so many things that have to line up for a band to make a record at this point, let alone a good one.. when i told my parents 22 years ago i was gonna take a semester off to see what the band thing did… that was it.”

pete: “i’m pitching a reality show where he goes back to school. immediately after this. the semester is over!”

they talk about the first tour and how it went sideways but zane goes “but you shouldve known, right?”

pete: “i always knew- when patrick sang the first time i was like, “this is very special” and if we could craft something around this it will be very special. to me its like watching -and i can say this because im not patrick obviously- a great basketball player in highschool, like you know it’s there- you just gotta build it around him.”

zane asks if pete knew at the time how instrumental he’d be with writing the lyrics for fob. pete says no. zane compliments pete on the lyrics for the new single :-)

zane talks about their dynamic and how we’ve seen it before in duos like elton and bernie: “its rare but when you get it right theres something magical about it.”

patrick: “it’s really blind luck to find that person, to find somebody you write with like that, when you do its amazing because- like i said, the whole point for me was that i wanted to write songs. i like composing music. im not one of those people that keeps a journal and has all of these deep thoughts that i want to share with the world. i have to make music. and when pete sends me words, it’s like christmas morning. i open ‘em up and i dont even write, im just reading ‘em and it writes itself.”

pete talks about how because of covid and because of his family and how they all got tighter during it, new fob has to be something important and with purpose because he doesnt want to leave his family. it cant just be a random show here and there. it couldnt be that anymore.

pete: “you wanna do it for the reason you originally loved. […] life is short and long.” he also talks about how some things you just do every day because youre used to it and how it becomes part of you and how its good to be able to step back and assess yourself and ask “why”

patrick: “it’s funny thinking about the why. people would ask me about folie, and its a very love it or hate it record, and why its different… and i wanted to get back to this feeling we had when we were making [folie] which was like, “i don’t know how much longer this will last.” when we did that record, the “emo” thing had this zeitgeist explosion moment and we got swept up in it, but i dont know if we’re gonna be pop stars tomorrow. so this is the last time i can gurantee someone’s gonna front the bill for the orchestra, y’know? so there was an urgency of wanting to get your idea on tape because who knows? growing up in chicago, most of the bands i knew who had the major label record- maybe had a hit and they maybe kinda fell off. thats what i was used to so i expected that, so i was like “this might be the last record i ever make”.

#thinking a lot of thoughts #they seemed a lot less tense/stressed and more happy/chill in this than a bunch of first couple mania interviews though! #recap

[echomimus]

How do you think Leon would react to finding out Danny is the Ghostface in a modern ah, after they’ve been together for sometime? I imagine he’d be very devastated but also torn bc we all know leon’s moral compass is spinning round when Danny is involved 💀

i think that it depends on how long they’ve been knowing/dating each other 🤔 trust is very important, and hiding that he’s the Ghostface is a HUGE LIE LOL

to be honest with you i think that leon would of course be torn and devastated - but also pissed because danny would’ve hidden such a big part of his life from him (with his fucked up moral compass, in the long run he’d be more pissed about not knowing that about, you know. the murders lol)

i think he would be torn because, you know. “im mad in love with him but he’s a murderer. i have to report him to the police. he’s going to die/go to jail because of me. i don’t want to loose him. he’s a murderer. if i stay with him and he get caught i’ll fall with him. i can’t pretend he isn’t a murderer. but i’m in love with him. why did he hid it from me ? doesn’t he trust me ? does he even love me ? or was it a lie too ? what should i do ? i can’t ask for advice, i need to protect him. he’s a fucking MURDERER”

so, in short : he would have the biggest panic attack known to mankind and then he would probably sit in a corner and think

#thinking a lot of thoughts #not sure how he would find out though #since danny is very careful about his “hobby” #how would danny react to leon’s panic attack 🤔 #ghostleon #headcanon #ask #feel free to ask more stuff/request doodles ! #i still have a handful of prompts to draw but i want MORE #im just seeing my ask box getting emptier and it makes me anxious lol so i postpone my doodles bc i don’t want it to be empty #i might have some issues.

[bunches-of-lilacs]

i want someone to be gentle with me.

#thinking a lot of thoughts #being called princess or kiddo #getting my scrapes bandaged #being held and carried #tummy rubs...playing with my hair... #gentle words #idk #yearning

[seveneyesoup]

#TO CLARIFY ON THE SECOND POINT: VAMPIRES *HAVE* A REPRODUCTION METHOD THAT IS NOT SEX-BASED #THAT IS THE MAJOR POINT OF THAT ONE. THAT VAMP REPRODUCTION IS BASED ON CONVERTING INTO UNDEAD AND NOT PREGNANCY #what i think i keep coming back to is that a vampire is like. a form of pathogen or perhaps parasite #is the individual vampire meaningfully distinct from that? maybe #sort of a made up question #but that’s not a mammal #so neither is a vampire #but also like. a human is a mammal #this question sponsored by my friend who said she was done keeping mammals bc ‘they have so much fluid in them’ #and my thought that a vampire Wouldn’t #not a lot of fluids. happening there

[indigo6f00ff]

need to share an experience i had 30 minutes ago

(edit: thanks to @walks-the-ages for providing and reminding me to put alt text, sorry it slips my mind alot lol)

#my hands are still shaking to be quite honest i could not put a lot of effort into this. #but like. brain. why did you do that #literally i have been like hopelessly obsessed with de nonstop thinking abt it for the past couple of days it is Scaring me #it is terminal its soooo fucking chronic #disco elysium #kim kitsuragi #for anyone who wants to know i bumped into some guys car that was stopped for a school bus. i think my brain errored and thought #my foot was fully pressing down on the brake pedal but it wasnt. #i am like 99.99 percent sure neither of us had any major damage to our cars but we still filed a police report just in case #because insurance do be a bitch. dudes back bumper was scratched lightly and my front license plate has a dent now #also literally my first ever car accident that ive had ever yippee yay

[inkskinned]

the thing is that they're so fascinated by sex, they love sex, they can't imagine a world without sex - they need sex to sell things, they need sex to be part of their personality, they need sex to prove their power - but they hate sex. they are disgusted by it.

sex is the only thing that holds their attention, and it is also the thing that can never be discussed directly.

you can't tell a child the normal names for parts of their body, that's sexual in nature, because the body isn't a body, it's a vessel of sex. it doesn't matter that it's been proven in studies (over and over) that kids need to know the names of their genitals; that they internalize sexual shame at a very young age and know it's 'dirty' to have a body; that it overwhelmingly protects children for them to have the correct words to communicate with. what matters is that they're sexual organs. what matters is that it freaks them out to think about kids having body parts - which only exist in the context of sex.

it's gross to talk about a period or how to check for cancer in a testicle or breast. that is nasty, illicit. there will be no pain meds for harsh medical procedures, just because they feature a cervix.

but they will put out an ad of you scantily-clad. you will sell their cars for them, because you have abs, a body. you will drip sex. you will ooze it, like a goo. like you were put on this planet to secrete wealth into their open palms.

they will hit you with that same palm. it will be disgusting that you like leather or leashes, but they will put their movie characters in leather and latex. it will be wrong of you to want sexual freedom, but they will mark their success in the number of people they bed.

they will crow that it's inappropriate for children so there will be no lessons on how to properly apply a condom, even to teens. it's teaching them the wrong things. no lessons on the diversity of sexual organ growth, none on how to obtain consent properly, none on how to recognize when you feel unsafe in your body. if you are a teenager, you have probably already been sexualized at some point in your life. you will have seen someone also-your-age who is splashed across a tv screen or a magazine or married to someone three times your age. you will watch people pull their hair into pigtails so they look like you. so that they can be sexy because of youth. one of the most common pornography searches involves newly-18 young women. girls. the words "barely legal," a hiss of glass sand over your skin.

barely legal. there are bills in place that will not allow people to feel safe in their own bodies. there are people working so hard to punish any person for having sex in a way that isn't god-fearing and submissive. heteronormative. the sex has to be at their feet, on your knees, your eyes wet. when was the first time you saw another person crying in pornography and thought - okay but for real. she looks super unhappy. later, when you are unhappy, you will close your eyes and ignore the feeling and act the role you have been taught to keep playing. they will punish the sex workers, remove the places they can practice their trade safely. they will then make casual jokes about how they sexually harass their nanny.

and they love sex but they hate that you're having sex. you need to have their ornamental, perfunctory, dispassionate sex. so you can't kiss your girlfriend in the bible belt because it is gross to have sex with someone of the same gender. so you can't get your tubes tied in new england because you might change your mind. so you can't admit you were sexually assaulted because real men don't get hurt, you should be grateful. you cannot handle your own body, you cannot handle the risks involved, let other people decide that for you. you aren't ready yet.

but they need you to have sex because you need to have kids. at 15, you are old enough to parent. you are not old enough to hear the word fuck too many times on television.

they are horrified by sex and they never stop talking about it, thinking about it, making everything unnecessarily preverted. the saying - a thief thinks everyone steals. they stand up at their podiums and they look out at the crowd and they sign a bill into place that makes sexwork even more unsafe and they stand up and smile and sign a bill that makes gender-affirming care illegal and they get up and they shrug their shoulders and write don't say gay and they get up, and they make the world about sex, but this horrible, plastic vision of it that they have. this wretched, emotionless thing that holds so much weight it's staggering. they put their whole spine behind it and they push and they say it's normal!

this horrible world they live in. disgusted and also obsessed.

#this shifts gender so much bc it actually affects everyone #yes it's a gendered phenomenon. i have written a LOT about how different genders experience it. that's for a different post. #writeblr #ps my comments about seeing someone cry -- this is not to shame any person #and on this blog we support workers. #at the same time it's a really hard experience to see someone that looks like you. clearly in agony. and have them forced to keep going. #when you're young it doesn't necessarily look like acting. it looks scary. and that's what this is about - the fact that teens #have likely already been exposed to that definition of things. because the internet exists #and without the context of healthy education. THAT is the image burned into their minds about what it looks like. #it's also just one of those personal nuanced biases - #at 19 i thought it was normal to be in pain. to cry. to not-like-it. that it should be perfunctory. #it was what i had seen. #and it didn't help that my religious upbringing was like . 'yeah that's what you get for premarital. but also for the reference #we do think you should never actually enjoy it lol' #so like the point im making is that ppl get exposed to that stuff without the context of something more tender #and assume .... 'oh. so it's fine i am not enjoying myself'. and i know they do because I DID. #he was my first boyfriend. how was i supposed to know any different #i didn't even have the mental wherewithal to realize im a lesbian . like THAT used to suffering.

[clown-owo]

been replaying the Portal series I think this is where its heading

#i haven't drawn in like. half a month. which listen i know i don't post much here but i do draw a lot #i have another blog. but also sometimes i just don't post things. i draw for myself #just got burnt out from working on an animation final 😔 #so anyway. eased myself back in with a silly comic about portal #my irl saw my shitty sketch and thought glados was painting chell which is very funny to me. #chelldos #but like. unrequited. glados is obsessed with chell. chell is not having a good time #portal #chell #GlaDOS #GlaD0S #my art #og post #1k #5k #10k #20k #edit: i made this post almost a year ago and it haunts me. theres a typo. chell is out of character. #because i couldn't come up with a good reason for her to be there in the first place #and this was a shitty ms paint replicating drawing that i did just to get back into drawing #i didn't think it would gain much attention #i was Wrong #anyway someone in the comments said this is what happens when you speedrun thats an infintely better setup for the punchline #EDIT 2: ok i fixed it fuck you

[ikiprian]

Ghost Kitchen (brought to you by criminal entrepreneur, Red Hood)

Danny’s got the easiest job in Gotham.

He works as a fry cook at a shoddily-run, independent burger joint. Hardly anyone comes in, despite prices being criminally low, and portions insanely large, and while the manager looks like the average tough-as-nails ex-con, he lets Danny mess around in the kitchen whenever the place is empty. (Which is often. This place has to be the city’s hidden gem or something!)

Mr. Manager’s the only one ever there with Danny, except for sometimes when his buddies come over to smoke and play cards. Danny would find it shady, except part of his job is not to ask questions. Literally, he was told during the interview.

(It was a weird interview. Why would they need to hire someone who’s been in a gunfight before? Like, he has, but Gotham’s idea of “hirable qualities” is so bizarre.)

So instead he whips up some killer burgers with the frozen ingredients, and basks in the praise as the guys tell him he shouldn’t have, he does too much for this joint, ain’t that friendly!

Now, Danny’s a chef on the newer side. As a teen he’d preferred the look of Nasty Burger over anything with Michelin stars, and he only really took up cooking after Jazz moved out for college. But just like ecto-exposure used to turn the groceries sentient, Danny’s low-level ecto signature imbues all his food with something historically haunted Gothamites just love! And Danny’s never been one to half-ass a job when it makes people happy.

With fresher produce, real meat, Danny’s sure he can take his dishes to the next level. It takes a couple months of badgering, but his manager finally agrees to contact the mysterious store owner, who keeps the place going, despite profits Danny knows have to be in the red.

Danny spends the morning prepping. He pours his heart into his food, eager to impress. The big boss will be here soon, and he wants to prove that despite the dangerous location, this place has real potential!

It isn’t until the Red Hood shows up that Danny realizes he’s been working for a money laundering scheme.

#ecto has a weird effect on them actually. a lot like how danielle drinks ecto to keep her stable #ecto has positive health benefits for gothamites! it boosts their immune system gives them a little more energy makes them less irritable #silly hc but i think its fun #also danny just. thought it was a normal ass interview. the person who hired him was heavily hinting at the criminal element of his job the #whole time. danny just kept thinking man i cant believe all interviews are like this in gotham. every one of the #m asks if im okay lying to cops. i am but its weird i never got asked this in amity #dpxdc #dcxdp #dc x dp #dp x dc #dead on main #ghost kitchen au #danny fenton #jason todd #kipwrite

[stuckinapril]

friend wanted to see my tumblr, and when i told him i can’t show it to him bc it’s basically my personal diary he went “oh so I can’t see it but a bunch of strangers on tumblr can??” he literally does not get me. no one will get me like the people in my phone get me

#It’s just so different #even though it’s public it still feels secret and safe. i feel comfy sharing a lot more on here than I do in my actual day to day life lol #in my head I’m also just speaking to myself 90% of the time which helps #if a friend off tumblr saw my thoughts I’d feel so weird ab it #esp bc they might get the vagueposting about certain situations and tell mutual friends #no thank u. this is for me. I’m not about to start censoring my thoughts bc someone I know knows my tumblr #u guys literally saw me have LIVE BREAKDOWNS #meanwhile I’ll have the worst fucking day in history and tell no one about it. I’m already cripplingly private but way more so in real life #this is basically a low stress journaling outlet for me. it’s so important for me to maintain the separation #like this is actually my diary & has been so handy for letting out emotions / articulating thoughts / staying on track !! #& I’ve met so many kind people on here who actually get me. which is so hard to find irl bc I’m surrounded by pre-med gunners/overachievers #who are by standard not very good w emotion & can be competitive/judgmental. or at least it’s hard for me to be vulnerable in front of them #and I’m part of that crowd so I reserve my emotions only to a handful of very close friends #it’s nice to hop on here and express negative emotions!! or positive emotions!! just whatever I want and it’s low stress and people get me #I don’t have to worry about judgment or competitiveness etc etc #like everyone on here is so kind & nice & understanding. & just a breath of fresh air from the types I run w. it’s just nice to have this #so idk that’s why I think I’ll always be strict about keeping the worlds separate. it just works #p

[verflares]

(click for higher quality!) draconified link concept ive been chipping away at this past week ..... here's my funny little compendium concept for him:

"A heroic spirit has taken the form of this bestial dragon. Unlike it's kin, this creature exhibits an extremely aggressive disposition. It appears highly territorial, and will relentlessly chase down those who disturb its skywide patrols - of which it seems to be endlessly searching for either a long-time vassal or foe. Unfortunately, it seems the spirit within has long since forgotten exactly who it was looking for…"

#now. how on earth do i begin to tag this. um. #link #loz #totk #totk spoilers #light dragon #dragon link #loz au #totk roleswap au #there . i'll add more if they come to me LOL #um i can talk about some of my insps i guess?? might make another post too #so mostly i just dont really like turning him into 'light dragon but male' and giving him slightly darker colours or something like that #this also obviously isnt exactly like the botw dragons either though and its a bit more of a mix of other creature concepts i enjoy #since everyone agrees he'd have a farosh horn i wanted to make him a kirin/unicorn :) which is why his tail looks like that #aside from the obvious eastern dragon insps and what ive picked and chosen from the botw dragons #and obviously this looks a lot like wolf link. thats on purpose #i wanted to give him some fierce deity design refs too but because this is so dark/earthy they didnt look very fitting #but honestly you could do a whole fierce deity dragon design on its own i think #okay lots of tags but IVE THOUGHT ABOUT THIS FOR A WHILE. okay. let me have this. #my art

[lazylittledragon]

Hello I love your bg3 content and your Dorian is so lovely! Can we get like an alternative reality with Dorian and Ascended Astarion? What would your headcannon be for them? 🙇

something like this, probably

#bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #astarion #tavstarion #ascended astarion #tw blood #long post #i may have gotten carried away with this #the only good thing dorian got out of being vampire lord astarion's concubine was a lovely bedchamber and a dramatic robe #i think dorian's attitude to a lot of things is 'it can't be that bad' until it is very very very bad #'maybe he won't be that bad' until you've been locked in a palace for decades and there's nothing left for you to love anymore #i got nauseous writing this i HATE him #it was such a delicious prompt though and i can't say i never thought about it #also i didn't realise until after i wrote it that this was how interview with the vampire ends. nvm

[floccinaucinihilipilificationa]

#selfie bee #good evening friends!! how are you doing! C: #I'm very very sleepy I got a new ikea office chair and I build it all myself #I think it went okay! I don't think I pulled the back screw tight enough and now the back is a bit loose #I can probably fix it but I can also ignore it for the next 18 years #thats how long the old chair held up!! in germany it could now drink vodka and drive a car!! #not at the same time that is illegal! not at the same time!! (❁´▽`❁)*✲ﾟ* #but the day is not over yet my uncle asked me for a big art quest and I do not want to disappoint #he wants a muppet tattoo and asked me to draw it #my uncle has started to get tattoos a few months ago #as far as I know he has now gotten 3 note clefs 3 stars a flower and multiple birds #he also started getting piercings but so far I managed not to know exactly where #I think tattoos are super cool (´｡･v･｡｀) I wish I had a good idea for a tattoo but the last time I was very sure about getting a tattoo #it was heath ledgers face as the joker #at that point I was 12 and would not see the actual movie for two more years #a muppet tattoo is a way better idea!! he asked for the count van count! that is also one of my top 3 muppets ₍՞◌′ᵕ‵ू◌₎♡ #I always thought I knew a lot about muppet lore but since I started looking up muppet pictures I think there are still a lot of secrets #can the muppets from the Sesame Street actually leave the Sesame Street? #I think Kermit is both on the Muppet Show and on Sesame Street but he is also like the boss muppet #he might have special abilities #I hope you're having a good day friends!! C: #I think I'll post a Sherlock comic later this week #miss you!! ♥♥♥

[linddzz]

Thinking about Weird Barbie and how she's the very obviously queer outsider of the Barbie world, she straddles the lines between Barbie and the Real World. She's the most aware of the performative nature of it all. She supports Barbie while also gently mocking her panic at losing the hyperfeminine perfection. Her weird house is also home to the discontinued reject weird Barbies, the outcasts (including very gay earring Ken) who never fell into either the original matriarchy or the Kentriarchy brainwashing.

The other more classically heteronormative and beautiful Barbies both pity and fear her, and at first the narrative pities her as well. She's the vessel of girls going weird and crazy and feral on their dolls and that's amazing. Weird Barbie is aware of who she is and how the world sees her and she loves it. She's Weird Barbie and She Owns It.

#i couldnt identify with a lot of the Barbies Feminine Crisis on as deep a level as other women i know #but holy shit did i see what they did with Weird Barbie aka Queer Barbie #GOD this movie did such a great job capturing the feeling of #gender is fake and but also its real #ive been having gender thoughts #mostly about how im so goddamn ambivalent about gender that i can't even identify #with the idea of thinking about What Is My Gender enough to say its nonbinary #my gender is Sure Okay #she/her yeah fine its whatever #barbie

[onionninjasstuff]

#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rottmnt #rottmnt donnie #no real context lmao #just found an ancient sketch of this and got out of nowhere motivation to finish it #thinking abt the way i used to treat myself in the past is very bittersweet #cuz i lost sm time worrying abt my skills and presentation and restricting myself a lot and demanding so much out of myself all the time #i still struggle with it #but at the same time looking back fills me w pride and love for both my current and past selves #theres a lot of growth and progress there #and past me wasnt half as bad as they thought either #never be hard on urselves gamers #go out there embrace the world embrace urselves