#these were over the period of like

[cheaphooptricks]

smol art dump

herons and snakes! Wanted to experiment with fluidity and smooth/sharp lines, which it helped, but i still wanna improve with it

this one kinnndddaa has a story basically as a kid my dad would hunt birds, and before the bird went stiff, he would put marbles in the birds feet, so that it would grasp onto it. Yeah thats it. I liked this one, but yeah color stil aint my thing

Finally Arcane!!!!! Im hoping to finish this one, its still a wip, and also im stuck on trying to capture Jinx's likeness. But yeah very messy i did this at like 1 am so dont judge.

yipee!!!

#I see some improvement looking back tho! #hopefully in a few years ill have a good archive #to look back to when I've reached higher points #reaaaaaly wanna finish that Arcane pic tho #i liked it #but alas #motivation is sparse #these were over the period of like #a month or two i think #not sure #anyways #this is becoming a #ramble #cheap tricks #my art #biology posting #arcane silco #jinx arcane #arcane #tw slight gore #for the herons #and the story behind the raven #alright bye

[canisalbus]

✦ Freshly ordained ✦

#a packless dog will happily accept his collar or something like that #own art #own characters #CanisAlbus #art #artists on tumblr #Machete #anthro #sighthound #dogs #canine #animals #maybe you might benefit from a little bit of context in this case #Machete becomes a priest at around 20 or so #he has trained all his life for this goal #he has worked himself to the bone and sacrificed so much #because he believes it would make him respectable and worthy and give his life a purpose and meaning #he gets his very first cassock from the tailor's and it immediately fits like a second skin #for the first time ever he feels like something he wears actually makes him look kind of nice #the hard part is over it'll be smooth sailing from here on out #there's a period in Vasco's and Machete's lives where they were apart for almost a decad #they met in their late teens when they were both studying in the same university in Venice #became friends and then lovers #but had to separate when Machete graduated and Vasco dropped out #Machete was ordained as intended and Vasco followed his father into politics #they meet again unexpectedly in their early 30's thanks to their similar jobs #Machete had became a cardinal secretary of state and Vasco was a Florentine diplomat #this takes place shortly after he had lost contact with Vasco and before he reconnects with him again

[lucabyte]

i feel like people are sleeping on the occam's razor situation of how buckwild it is to outright accuse a guy of being a clone of your friend even if you DO have a lot of circumstantial evidence. there's other options is what im saying. they could just be like. a guy. that's a sensible deduction. you should explore that deduction. ignore my shirt that reads I <3 RED HERRINGS.

i still think odile has the correct theory on lock but she's smart enough to know it needs like... a real smoking gun to be able to bring it up without sounding insane.

anyway. (mirabelle voice) i know its rude to speculate but has anyone else noticed the grieving? they seem to be grieving. does anyone have any thoughts on the grieving? i have some thoughts on the grieving.

#[isabeau voice] am i insane or does sometimes loop talk like they might have killed their whole family. is that just me? just checking. #nille design highly inspired by @kiwibrain's since its the one that imprinted in my mind. liberties taken since i didnt look @ reference #anyway i have a lot more thoughts on this? i guess ill hide them in the tags...? scroll down i suppose. #isat #in stars and time #isat spoilers #in stars and time spoilers #isat act 6 spoilers #isat loop #isat siffrin #isat bonnie #isat nille #isat fanart #in stars and time fanart #doodlebyte #---------------------------------------------------------------------- #anyway the extra thoughts. are literally just my general thoughts on postcanon. (and thus are the context for all of my postcanon doodles!) #which is i think nille joins the party before loop reappears for a start (either from a period of nonexistence or just wandering around) #and that like. i think the party should be able to integrate loop as a completely new person. because they are! the secrecy isn't great but #They and Siffrin shuffle into different ecological niches in the party (eg. i think sif is more squeamish after it all but loop isnt) #and while it's not *exactly* what Loop wanted they get that beggars can't be choosers. and its pretty good #(i am glossing over how i think loop's reappearence drags both them and siffrin into a massive behavioural backslide and is likely a bit #distressing to watch go down. cycle of argument -> lovebombing -> normalcy -> repeat. etc etc. but since they are no longer literally #stewing in the worst pressure cooker of all time they do resolve it via productive conversation on their own time. its fine) #the party well-meaningly tries to deduce things from loop's vagueries and are able to pin down the DEAD FAMILY vibe pretty quickly. #but eventually the question of their prior identity falls by the wayside because well! they're just their friend loop! (also change belief) #as for how The Truth Come Out... this is what i mean by The Isabeau Torment Nexus(tm). which is that i think... isiloop should almost occur #BEFORE isabeau knows who loop is. he's just genuinely charmed by them eventually and tries to close the open end of the polycule #which FREAKS LOOP THE FUCK OUT because thats just too genuinely sick and wrong. and obviously w emotions high its not a great confrontation #ANYWAY told u i had more thoughts. if i were normal itd be a text post but.

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

you want a new kind of guy, fine, i raise you: the lady i was briefly roommates with in college who once smoked a blunt at a party and then spent an hour confessing earnestly to me that she genuinely preferred reading detailed episode recaps over actually watching the tv show in question

#she sounded so remorseful & i just stood staring like an anthropologist watching their phd thesis spontaneously manifest before their eyes #apparently she would watch the pilot episode to get a feel for the characters #and then just read a bunch of recaps & episode reviews instead of watching future episodes. what fresh steaming hell #this conversation took place like a year and a half after we were roommates btw. i had seen her maybe twice in that time period #i thought she was a standard frat girl but then 18 months later she appears in the wild grass to reveal unhinged character background to me #and i'm just standing there nodding feeling like i missed a weird opportunity i did not want or ask for #honestly thought i was the weirdest person in that apartment situation but now i'm wondering what our other 2 roommates were hiding #not my strangest college experience at ALL but like. definitely top 20 #this wasn't the same person as Aquarium Girl btw but oddly enough they were roommates actually #(not at the same time that Recaps Lady and i were roommates but at different intervals idk) #anyway i probably should have interviewed at more than one apartment before taking over a sublease but summer sess is a weird time u know #oh and this happened in Hong Kong btw

[vyeoh]

I'm being 100% serious one of the worst things stan culture has done is making suicide jokes commonplace again

#like we had a brief period of time where people were getting over the edgy kys jokes and then twitter and tik tok brought them fully swing #i despise it so much its bad for your own mental health and its bad for others #vio.txt #vio.rant #tw suicide #call me easily triggered but it legit makes me so uncomfortable on a good day and makes me spiral on a bad one #and like u can't ask people to stop without it being weird

[stil-lindigo]

the dredger.

a comic about closure.

(buy the digital copy of the comic anthology here)

creative notes:

#i wrote my best stuff when i was at my very worst mentally #both RED and Patchwork Canary were written during an emotional pit #i struggled for a while. thinking about that #especially since those two came so easily to me back then and its so difficult to write anything like it these days #but i think id trade being happy over writing Only Bangers any day #closure #i made this comic series about the worst period of my mental health ever and now its over #its 10pm #and i dont know who i am #and thats fine. ill figure it out as i go. #thank you for reading #and thank you for your support #i promise my next project wont be as sad #stillindigo art #comic art #stillindigo comics

[paxcallow]

sketch dumps. composed mostly of razzes. with bonus lilis. aged up character designs i hope you're like :)

#psychonauts #razputin aquato #lili zanotto #psychonauts interns #(various) #norma natividad #fuckin norma. #my art #fanart #blood #minor amount but still i tag #drug reference #ow ow my ehad hurts from obsessing over psychonauts for a week straight #i get my grubby little hands on raz and i make him a weirdo about tickling like me. he is extremely [wiggles fingers diabolically] #to be fair. canon is in my favor about this. #i like the idea of people looking away and then being periodically shocked that raz and lili are still dating #someone: what do you mean you are still dating the girl you met when you were ten. don't you want to date other people #raz: what do you mean you're not buying any more lottery tickets after winning 3 gazillion dollars. don't you want to scratch more tickets

[kevindavidday]

literally cannot stop thinking about the foxes growing up to be helpful adults especially the monsters because like with the upperclassmen and even with nicky its slightly more expected as compared to the twinyards, kevin and neil

not by my own definition but by the perception people have of them in canon - the selfish, hotheaded or largely indifferent to everyone except their own affairs type of people

but aaron chose to become a doctor and i think of him seeing mothers give up their kids at birth and of people constantly loving and losing and how possible it is for him to be known as a kind doctor - someone who would sit with a man who lost his wife or a mother who's lost her child, someone who would do coffee runs for his colleagues and give flowers to recovering patients (and maybe katelyn bought them the first time but he could repeat the gesture, yknow? he's got a good learning curve)

im thinking of kevin making sure that a portion of his hefty income goes to actual genuine charities and for work against human trafficking and child abuse because what's he going to do with this much money? particularly after amalia is born he would be so much more careful if he ever sees kids or teenagers in parking lots and senses some imminent danger

not just that but kevin keeping an eye out for his fans or any signing events he has where he sees something unfair happen and steps in or asks security to step in immediately i feel like for him its still difficult to put himself on the forefront of a threatening situation unlike andreil but he does his best to try and to listen to the kids that come and rant to him about exy to entertain them with his genuine smiles

idk just the idea of the monsters being so very human and recognizing humanity in others is something that can be so personal

#the more i see the 'andreil moved in and got two cats they're living the life' type of posts its making me think #about how the monsters all did eventually settle down #life did not end when they were teenagers they made it out of that hellish period to a timeline where they #have responsibility over themselves their actions can make an impact and in small subtle ways they can see that #they know how much it would have mattered if someone had been there with them during their tough times #they know better than anyone how insane it is to have someone help u it feels smthn like how neil does whenever the foxes are kind to him #and why would he reserve that to himself? they didn't know him and their kindness knew no bounds how could he not pay it forward? #they would make wymack proud #aftg #tfc #kevin day #aaron minyard #neil josten #andrew minyard #andreil #kevaaron

[cowboy-robooty]

watched brokeback mountain yesterday.... mid as fuck. i think it wouldve played out a lot better if the main characters were yuri and jimmy from yarichin bitch club. do u see my vision?

#brokeback mountain #yarichin bitch club #yarichin b club #toru fujisaki #yuri ayato #ybc #ybc jimmy #yuritoru #idk their fuckin ship name #im a gay male im allowed to say brokeback mountain actually fucking sucks #i get what its doing yknow time period repression tragedy wrong time wrong place BUT GODDD I JUST DONT CARE #I DONT CARE IT SUCKS AND CHEATING TURNS ME OFF SO BAD #its like good in a technical skill way okay its a well made movie but my enjoyment was a solid 2/10 i could only watch it wif my friends #main way this could be improved is if the main characters were jimmy and yuri #if yuri and jimmy were doing this shit.... lets just say they wouldnt be hatecrimed to death for being gay #theyd be begged to leave town purely bc theyre both batshit insane and jimmy would accidentally kill 17 people via homemade cookie poisoning #draws #**obama voice** just to be queer. i traced over screenshots for this shitpost. that is all

[rotzaprachim]

I say this as someone who obviously opposes the Vietnam war, the war in Afghanistan, and the current war in I/p, but I think a lot of Americans including one I was just talking to haven’t got a lot of comprehension that it sure took the uS a lot longer than five months for public opinion to shift strongly away from supporting any of the above, but furthermore - we dont fucking KNOW what the us gov or us public would do or support if they had a hostage crisis with hundreds of us civilians being held by the viet cong or taliban or Sinaloa cartel for months on end, with significant evidence of that group committing sexual assault, within kilometers of where Americans lived. This is not an equivalent thing thing that has ever happened to the us and for the sake of world peace we can be glad it never has, but it’s truly beyond our comprehension what the US (or uk or Canada and such) might do

#A lot of people seem not to grasp that I has incredibly disproportionate power and security relative to p in this situation #But neither is in any way comparable to the middle class white American level of safety #(Relative. There are other issues like gun control etc etc) #But like. It’s apples to oranges you have no idea what the us gov would do if like. #There were rockets periodically exploding over small town USA #The upper middle class residents of dc all had safety rooms in ther apartments #You don’t. Know

[canisalbus]

Hello! I hope I won't sour your mood with this ask but I have been thinking a lot about your gay dogs this month especially.

I'll just try to keep the context short but in general I'm someone that has accepted being romantically undesireable. It was hard but in the end I have built my life just around me, my humble family and at this point in time I don't even think I have the time for a partner. And considering that it's the love month and a lot of people are preparing to celebrate it with their SOs I assumed that, actually, this is a thing that I sort of have in common with Machete.

From the miscellaneous lore on your profile I see Machete as someone that also has kind of rejected love. That also has built his life around his job, possibly hobbies, his family or mentors (depending if we're talking about canon or modern au). Who kind of forgot that relationships are a thing and that people bond with others in that way. Well, at least he did until meeting Vasco.

I just love thinking about their awkward beginnings. Machete being 100% sure that Vasco is just joking, maybe even sometimes teasing him (in a friendly banter type way) or just explaining to himself that all that kindness and interest is just him being a very considerate friend. And then we have Vasco that just tries to be subtle, as if he was trying to pass a fawn without it noticing and running away, but also with time gains confidence and tries more risque moves. Vasco being all smug and Machete being flustered when their hands or shoulders or tails brush in passing. And then when both are sure of their feelings we have Machete who has to choose between God and his love. Who, at first, unwillingly accepts that divine wrath will be worth their brief love.

I just love your boys. I swear they are all the love supply one might possibly need

Thank you for such a long and thoughtful message! I don't know why you thought you might accidentally sour my mood, I'm utterly delighted whenever I hear that someone has been pondering my little guys (rotating them in their head, as they say), and when they go through the trouble of sharing their findings and conclusions I'm so happy I could crawl up a wall.

I think you deciphered Machete's inner workings very well, especially those of the original canon version. The concept of love is of course prominent in Christianity, so even as a kid being raised in a religious environment that discouraged overt displays of affection and close personal bonds, Machete wasn't completely alienated from it. But it has always been a nebulous, unperceivable and unattainable thing for him. When he was old enough to lock down his career choice he readily accepted he'd never have romantic relationships, spouse or a family, and I think he must've been too young and socially inexperienced to think of it as a significant loss. Either he consciously blocked out the need for companionship by studying and working like his life depended on it, or he didn't really consider that being genuinely befriended, appreciated and loved as a person instead of a respectable and competent authority figure was even an option for him, at least not until Vasco came along.

#I think it took some time to get through his initial defences #especially since when they first met the stressful apprenticeship period was still fresh in Machete's mind #the years under his explosive and gaslighting mentor's wing had made him very distrustful so he preferred to just stick to himself #Vasco is good at winning people over and once he convinced him that he didn't have any ulterior motives they became besties pretty quickly #and even though the line between platonic and romantic started gradually blurring Machete kept convincing himself #that his feelings for Vasco were just Very Deep Friendship #and Vasco has an eye for noticing these things and a bolder personality #so when he tried to reciprocate a little bit Machete thought 'what a good friend he is' #'so kind and considerate and I'm so grateful and lucky to have him and I must not ruin things by getting too personal' #it was awkward and at times a little bit painful but I'd like to believe the progression was for the most part smooth and natural #considering the circumstances it could've been a lot more distressing #as corny as it is I think they were just happy to have found each other #they advanced at the same phase and reached the 'I think we've become a couple actually' stage at the same time #at least that's how I imagine it at the moment #answered #anonymous #Vaschete lore #long post

[bookshelfdreams]

americans learn what the middle ages are challenge

#15th century? that's the very very tail end (depending on what landmark you chose for an end) #16th century? ABSOLUTELY THE FUCK NOT #and also the witch hunts weren't really a medieval thing they mostly took place in the early modern era #and largely weren't perpetuated by 'the church' #and the inquisition spanish or otherwise had nothing to do with them #because church doctrine actually was that belief in witchcraft is superstition; only god is all-powerful #yes heinrich kramer called himself institoris. that doesnt mean anything it's just a fancy title he gave himself. #and hey guess what! protestant regions were way worse about killing witches than catholic ones. 'the church'? that's catholicism babe #do you see the flaw in your argument #anyway of course theres not an exact endpoint to the middle ages however #it's a period of a relatively stable socioeconomic system that collapses for various reasons #& things like the witch panic are a symptom of that collapse #so to talk about that in the same breath as *actual* medieval folklore & blame them on 'the church' #(when the catholic church losing power and influence was ALSO part of that collapse!) #is careless and silly #esp when you call yourself a historian #rant over

[antimonys-stuff]

STOP EVERYTHING AND GO READ THIS FIC. DO IT NOW.

i don't remember if i ever recommended this fanfiction here but even if i did do so, it deserves another mention and all the mentions that will (and they WILL!!!!) come after this. this is straight up the best zelda botw fanfic i have read. i have spasmodic euphoria every time i read it and i have read it a couple times already and the intensity does not change. the author has the hands of god and a mind worth the entire sun. if u have ever cared about botw even the tiniest bit or heck. even if you dgaf about botw read it. read it anyway. it's SO GOOD its DEVASTATING

#AREA MAN READS WORDS SO GOOD HE COMMITS ARSON!!!!!!! #my feelings towards this fic is like that one meme with the man surrounded by microphones saying Would #if this fic were real i would legally marry it #wake up babe it's tim's periodic losing it over ao3 perennials fanfiction #and IF U CARE BTW. THEY ALSO HAVE HAIKYUU FANFIC IN THERE. IT IS ALSO STRAIGHT UP GOD TIER #fic rec #the legend of zelda #zelda #botw #totk #zelink

[bumblingbabooshka]

Two people on a small bipartisan science station gently fall in love.

#S'veyk #Ehergha #S'veyk is half Vulcan half Klingon & Ehergha is full Klingon #beas ocs #both S'veyk and Ehergha bond over loving their home planets but wanting them to change their views on certain things #S'veyk wishes Vulcan were more accepting of others and Ehergha wishes there was more emphasis placed on honor in #things outside of war - though (and this is important) they both feel very proud of where they come from #Like a month after the above convo they're getting married btw #neither Vulcans nor Klingons seem to have a dating period as the cultural norm it's mostly just rituals and marriage <3 #skipping right to good stuff /j #Cute fact!: Ehergha and S'veyk attempt to nuzzle their heads together but his ridges are uncomfortable on her skin #(hers are more like raised bumps while his feel more like bone) #so they have to do it sooo carefully and gently but S'veyk insists on doing it!! #She also throws a vase at him after the above comic in an attempt to return his affections (she read about it) #and he's like 'you don't have to force it' (sorry) 'just - if it feels right you can throw something then.' #bea art tag #star trek oc #they are NOT in Starfleet

[suffarustuffaru]

i need to share my very horrible idea to combine the reinhard/julius/otto/subaru boy drama into one julius-centric fic

ok so a little while ago ive made all kinds of ottojuli and reinjuli posts and while i havent finished all my major julisuba posts Yet i am quite fond of julisuba also and i think itd be incredibly funny if you just dumped all of these ships into one story. just go ALL IN on that boy drama!!!! go big or go home amirite!!!! the worlds WORST love trapezoid youve ever seen!!!!

this post is just me rambling fic ideas bc i sadly dont have time for Every Fic Idea and also i just. i just think itd be funny putting multiple ships with the same person in them into one fic. on a serious level its like mimicking real life relationships where sometimes people come and go and you have different dynamics with each person!! on another level i just think this is also very funny so!! here we go. under the cut:

anyway so my idea for this is that you know, julius of course meets reinhard when hes ten and reinhard is eight and then it alters julius's brain chemistry. at first he's in complete awe of reinhard. and then over time the shame starts setting in. that julius isnt as strong as reinhard. and the jealousy sets in a bit too, so julius's got this chip in his shoulder trying to carry his family's legacy and trying to carry the weight of knighthood to be as perfect as possible. to be as close to reinhard as he can. they meet again in their teens and julius shows reinhard the ropes of like basic knight stuff bc reinhard just joined the knights. and of course reinjuli become friends but julius has spent his whole life quietly watching reinhard from afar and now julius still has that distance with reinhard even as theyre supposedly friends now. reinhard is a God, you know? his powers and his leash from the kingdom and his family keep him distant and the two of them are ignoring that. classic homoerotic "do i want him or want to be him" friendship where both of you are too scared to get any closer for various reasons with a Twist (reinhard's very real monster complex that keeps getting validated bc Everyone Around Him thinks hes a monster).

anyway but then julius remembers that you know, shit between reinhard and him wont work out for many reasons, like reinhards family deciding to torment julius at various points in his life (heinkel, whos julius's boss, and reid, who went from julius's childhood idol to. you know.), and also reinhard needs to have kids because hes the sword saint, and also homophobia exists in rezero. and also even if those werent all obstacles julius still has his Complexes connected to reinhard and they got that distance between them so. no go. (repression gets in the way of relationships :((( )

also quick side note is that ex 4 happens and julius reinhard ferris go to vollachia and julius interrupts a meeting with vincent vollachia himself to go "I UNDERSTOOD THAT LITERARY REFERENCE YOU JUST MADE. THATS A REALLY GOOD REFERENCE I LIKED IT A LOT" bc hes a massive nerd and ig this is slightly-more-of-a-disaster-gay julius au so julius is like ............................. vincent was kinda cool for that.

AND THEN SUBARU CRASHES INTO JULIUS'S LIFE and julius is like seeing this guy who's also got a chip in his shoulder and then he insults the knights and says the knights are all depending on their dads (nepotism) and julius is like .......the chip in my shoulder was bad enough and also youre kinda like me fr. and you are clearly a fucking misguided kid so now i have to save your ass. i cant NOT save your ass. and reinhards like "julius and subaru nooo you dont have to do this :((((" and julius cant admit atm that hes also doing this to save subarus life so julius is just like "he disrespected the knights >:(((("

but yes we all know what happened there. julius saves subarus life. julius has to slice subarus throat in that one failed loop. they become friends across several timelines. they also homoerotically share souls, you know, typical bromance things, rivals to lovers except subarus the one going YOURE MY RIVAL and julius is like he is SUCH an upstart. hes really grown on me like a fungus but thats the appeal. and julius i think sees subaru as like a kindred spirit (or at least thats how i interpret julisuba) except subaru is like way more freer than julius is. same desire to prove yourself but subarus not restraining himself constantly like julius. its sometimes to the point of recklessness and general stupidity and what have you, but his boldness and bravery and determination and heart really is admirable.........................

yeah so anyway julius falls for ANOTHER guy again, you know how it is sometimes. the heart wants what it wants and julius is cursed to always have the worst meetings with his closest friends. and of course julius gets heartbroken bc wtf i have to kill my new friend :((( noo!!!! but in the finished loop its like. oh subaru...... hes really improved himself. hes grown so much already. hes kind of. inspirational really. idk how he does it. except subarus you know got that Mystery to him the same way reinhard does (theyre traumatized and Cant Take About It Normally so they just randomly lore drop what they can) and also subarus SUPER into emilia. and julius is like .................... well. subarus taken. haha. and reinhards. taken. fuck me. fuck. and like somethings going on with subaru and rem and emilia right. fuck. and subarus got his whole toxic masculinity / gender crisis..... and he doesnt know hes Bisexual yet...... man. what a loss for julius amirite haha.

and also subarus busy after arc 3........... and julius has no idea whats happening there but that seems Real serious :(( and julius's got other things to attend to so he hopes subaru reaches out to him eventually..... or that they cross paths again since subarus in the emilia camp and julius is in ana camp (and of course reinhard is in felt camp and like that was a whole debacle bc wtf. reinhard, u do know thatd be a big deal to our mutual friend felix?). so. julius pines from afar ONCE AGAIN HAHA.

(also of course subarus still attracted to reinhard here. its um. well julisuba can bond now over pining over reinhard but thats for later also!!)

anyway of course during arc 3 julius briefly runs into some gray haired merchant twink thats being dragged around by subaru bc ana camp rescued this guy from a cave somewhere??? and this new guy and subaru made a deal or whatever so he was just helping out in the background of the fight against sloth??

and whaddya know................ julius goes to drink at a bar bc you know he probably tastes wine for fun in his free time (hes definitely Fond of wine anyway iirc) and now hes Sad over the Ones That Got Away so. bar it is. and gray haired merchant twink is there!! no way. they start talking a bit casually while drinking you know and julius's taste is Unfortunately either the graceful ones (anastasia, because julius has great taste in women) or the cringe fail ones (all the twinks - except for felix - that julius keeps having the wildest first meetings with, because julius has slightly shit taste in men) so julius is like huh this otto guys kinda funny lol. endearing in a weird way!! and -

oops they both end up being a little. they make a little bit of a move on each other. bc they were drinking and got a Bit tipsy. ottos Also not over the one that got away (subaru) (again) and hey. the finest knight truly is. Fine. objectively fine. totally. so you know. things get a little out of hand, maybe they do a bit of cringe fail flirting hidden underneath five million layers of repression and the Horrors of Being Known but ultimately they both embarrass themselves somehow (read: how far they went with each other while under the influence is up to you) and agree to Never Speak of This Again bc oopsies they were both technically each other's first time being Straightforwardly Not Straight with another man. oops. anyway julius has to go back to his camp and otto fucking bolts but he bolts right into subaru and gets his ass dragged into sanctuary drama.

julius is totally not a little bit envious about that.................... about otto getting to accompany subaru to sanctuary... but dont worry julius!! youll get to make up for it later!! bc eventually arc 5 stuff happens. and julius is Glad to see reinhard and subaru again. even with all the Baggage. and subaru is of course Weird about julius but eventually subaru reassures julius after they both confide in each other about the astrea drama (theyre honorary astreas via being dragged into the astrea family mess). and subarus reassuring to julius in a whole new way okay. subaru, whos unrestrained and incapable of being on the down low about anything, and julius, whos always holding himself back with a gazillion layers of repression, starts learning to let go a bit...

but also juliotto meet again. its terribly awkward and they both agreed to never speak of their awkward encounters again. subaru is going ??? and reinhard is clueless. otto then also goes to save reinhard and felt from heinkel trying to take felt hostage, which was also terribly awkward but reinhard and felt are grateful about it (but lbr if reinhard and otto knew each other deeper reinhard would maybe be a little. Apprehensive. around otto while otto would be sympathetic with reinhard bc hes like male emilia). but then while otto manages not to get erased by gluttony....... julius gets erased. of course. which you know results in being forgotten by reinhard in julius's THIRD first meeting ever with reinhard. and subarus the only one who remembers him of course.

then arc 6 happens :,))))) and julius of course has to confront his ideas of knighthood, his identity, his self esteem, and who he is outside of His Name. and also julius gets his ass beat by reid. his childhood idol. who reinhard KNEW was a shitty person but never ever told julius (whether this is because reinhard wanted to spare julius's hero worship or because reinhard never got the chance to tell julius is hard to say lajdsf). but julius does get to triumphantly win in the end!! grow as a person!!! learn to undo a bit of that repression and not hold himself to impossible standards all the time!! hes growing still!!! hes finally solidified his friendships with people like subaru and emilia!! hes remaking his relationship with anastasia!! hes asserted himself, hes planning on going to meet reinhard again one day and duel him!! things are looking up even if its still bittersweet that he doesnt have his name back yet!! does this mean?? perhaps?? a HAPPY ENDING?? julius can have the two men (reinhard and subaru) he admires the most in his life?????? as friends???? or as boyfriends?????? slowburn mutual pining????????????????????????????????????????

and then comes. arc 8 otto. that piece of shit.

julius is very much someone who has to grapple with the weight of the expectations that people throw at him. and also reinhard is someone who May envy julius a bit, but there's also you know, joshua and subaru with the Explicit Envy and (past) resentment because theyre placing heavy expectations on julius!! theyre pointing blame at julius!! julius is trying to find himself outside of stuff like that, especially after arc 6, but he's still got stuff to work on you know? he still has duties to fulfill!! loyalty that he has to act on bc hes gotta help subaru and co in arc 8!! and then in comes otto.

otto is also someone with expectation placed on him, but its Different. ottos mostly a nobody and when hes Not a nobody, his reputation tends to be Derogatory. hes a menace. hes a bad luck charm. hes grappling with the fact that he has to keep being left behind - post-arc 5 bc he was injured, but also repeatedly during arcs 7 and 8 because hes too physically weak to be on the same playing field as emilia or garfiel or subaru on the battlefield. he feels Useless after placing his identity on the expectation that hes Dependable and Useful.

julius is a bit more on even ground with otto now that julius is. also mostly a nobody bc his name is still gone. and also julius had to deal with having that part of his identity crushed. julius tried to be useful over and over in arc 6 only to get his ass repeatedly curb stomped by reid in the beginning. he was a nobody. he wasnt dependable anymore. and also otto is that one guy he had a Passing Fling with over having The Ones Who Got Away and julius was still vaguely hopeful about maybe being pals at least but ottos brushed him off a bit since arc 5. theyre like each others secrets you know? and now otto doesnt know that shit - julius is the only one who Knows - and otto also hates julius's fucking guts now. over SUBARU. and julius has been through this whole rodeo clown circus with arc 3 subaru so this is an absolutely terrible ride through memory lane.

and this is julius's THIRD twink that hates him for terribly unfair reasons. julius is very tired and a bit heartbroken in this au trying to pretend it doesnt bother him. on one level it doesnt. bc ottos pathetic and clearly Overcompensating for Something. on another level it kinda does bc julius had a Thing going with otto. and otto is the complete opposite of julius. like hes different from the other guys julius has liked.

julisuba is about complimentary opposites - they appear Extremely Different at first glance but theyre very similar. theyre people who try to look and act bigger than they are, people who keep reaching to be The Best, to be Perfect, because theyre overcompensating. theyre worried their entire identity is only built off of trying to be bigger than the shadow that other people in their lives (like their families) cast. but they cant reach perfection. and julius is like subaru but if subaru tried to really make himself "refined" - if he tried to stop putting his heart on his sleeve all the time. reinsuba are very similar too. theyre very refined knights who try to keep themselves in check at all times while the weight of the world is on their shoulders. they cant have a hair out of place. except julius is like the "smaller" version of reinhard. julius is less powerful. its like comparing a human and a "god" - reinhard, whos untouchable. but its a double edged sword, because julius gets to be a normal person, because half the expectation placed on him is also purely from himself, while reinhard isnt. reinhard isnt Free. hes on a leash by the kingdom and his family. julius even gets his kind of "celebrity" status stolen from him via the loss of his name. hes truly kind of Normal now - julius is like if reinhard didnt have his crazy abilities and had a little more of a chance to be free.

otto? yeah otto is. very very far from all of that. hes so obviously imperfect that most of his reputation, when its brought up, is just him being known as a mess who's caused various forms of chaos everywhere he goes. either that or hes just. There. Invisible. very very average. and otto is someone who wants a nice comfortable life, someone who wants to fit in - julius and subaru arent Exactly like that, and while reinhard also wants to be normal, ottos the one who has more of an opportunity. but he doesnt. because otto Dooms Himself by being recklessly cutthroat. otto is like if subaru was just. More of an asshole, so ottojuli would just be a rather Extreme Challenge for julius to have to deal with HAH. and normally otto is someone who repays how people treat him - a very "you treat me like this, i'll treat you the same way in turn" kind of deal, except ottos developed a vendetta against julius and its basically like if subaru never let go of his arc 3 julius vendetta.

yes so anyway. etc etc stuff probably happens but i ran out of ideas lajdlfjasdf i just think combining ALL the boy drama and recontextualizing + adding to canon would be. batshit crazy. and terribly entertaining. im so sorry julius but i want to see you crack a bit under the pressure. reinjuli as a ship is like tragic gay yearning that never goes anywhere past being friends with quiet homoerotic tension, then julisuba is. you know. extreme rivals to lovers, starts out Rough but then ends up being super super sweet and theyre Trying their best underneath the self esteem issues. and then ottojuli is. toxic yaoi at its finest (pun intended). you get Every flavor of mlm possible!!

ok so you may be asking "ok what would you even name this fic then" and to that i say that this would be called To All the Boys I've Loved Before.

anyway i really wanna write this idea someday ill inform you guys (if youre reading this and are Interested) if it ever happens :< so. in conclusion this is just julius the entire time throughout all of these events:

#rezero #re:zero #arc 5-8 spoilers #yes i made this post also so i can dramatically drop the wip title for this fic idea at the end of it and then laugh to myself bc i think #its the most perfect title of all time. #also adding up all of the rezero boy drama is important to me ok. and i was mostly going into the julius side of things in this post aldsjf #it gets messier when you remember reinsuba. and ottosuba. and reinotto. its incredibly funny to me. truly the worlds worst love pentagon. #or love square???? love shape???? #on a serious note i would love to see more queer stories exploring like. a person's different relationships over the years. bc sometimes it #does feel like this you know?? having drastically different dynamics with each person and each person knows you in different ways!! #its a fun character study exercise. and it feels true to life imo. you grow and change throughout your life and your relationships at each #time period can kind of reflect who you were as a person at the time. if that makes sense. idk i have many feelings on it HAH #natsuki subaru #reinhard van astrea #otto suwen #julius juukulius #also i do often hc reinhard otto julius as being on the ace spectrum. i dont really write otto being ace in mind for Every wip i do but yes #i do have these hcs and reasoning for them!!! also specifically i hc reinhard as being on the aroace spectrum. these are just hcs of course #hah but yes i quite like my hcs for them.

[saturfied]

kudos to all kimchay writers!!! y'all are doing a great job🫡👏❤️

#jeff satur #even jeffy agrees- #wonder what fics he read and what genres he likes #based on what we know of his interests #def any periodic or fantasy or thriller crime ones!!! #no comments on smut cause i have no clue if he'd enjoy that #i think some fluff in the middle wouldnt mind cause hes a soft babie #also any queer based like that one trans!kim where khun and kinn are very protective over him #and they subtly try to figure out chays intentions #or maybe he might enjoy the brotherly bonding ones too #y'all no comments on omegaverse though i think he'd be trauma by it- #but also pitbabe exists so again no idea #also where did he read them on twt tumble ao3??? #and were they thai or english? cause i dont know thai so i have 0idea if thai kimchay fics exist which i dont doubt they do #but curiosity i guess #omg what if he has read cotton candy crush- #or omg he said actors right #what about that kimchay au where theyre both actors and kimgame are besties #akdksjsj omg i hope he found shous art cause those are spectacular sorrynotsorry #omg so many possibilities i will run out of tags on here #idk rambles #maybe ill continue this on another post #kimchay #kinnporsche the series #kimhan theerapanyakul #porchay kittisawasd