#there's more i could've put here but i was already struggling on how to phrase certain things properly so we'll leave it here for now | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

sundial-girl · 8 months

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Hi! Would you like to explain how my portrayal of vsynths contrasts with Heron? I personally can’t figure out what makes it so interesting, since when I make Heron interact with other vsynths I rarely have a good idea of how they’ll work in mind, and just wing it.

hihi! i'd been meaning to get to this, so sure thing! for now i'll only focus on a few main ones that came to mind (i don't have a lot of brainpower atm 😔✌️) but i hope this is alright

mild disclaimer that some of this is based off information in older posts so i am aware that those prior details contained in them may no longer be canon. also again this just how i thought of/interpreted certain things, i'm obv not the og creator (you) so ultimately feel free to take this w/ a grain of salt since this might've not been the og intention.

also this is all under this cut here b/c it ended up being rly fckin long, sorry in advance if my explanations aren't very good 😭

so lets start w/ fukase; some of his character traits in your portrayal of him do seem to line up with some popular interpretations of him: silly guy/wisecracker who makes a lot of jokes, sometimes at the expense of others. also a he's a bit overdramatic ahdksjg. despite his sorta skewed goals, though, and behind that sassy attitude, he does really seem to care about people important to him. they're both very expressive characters (well in general everyone is depicted as very expressive in your art but thats an aside) but i think the way that is conveyed makes for an interesting contrast. fukase seems to show a lot more of his personality through his speech, while heron's personality is shown more through some of his actions. that's not to say heron is completely silent, but he does seem to save his words for more important occasions (or if he just really really feels like speaking his mind); whether that's because he's still a bit shy and/or just a quiet person in general, i'm not sure, but a lot more things with him seem to be conveyed through thoughts or external third-person commentary rather than him outright saying it. its definitely the opposite of fukase, who seems way more chatty and social. visually too there's a pretty neat contrast between them: aside from the height difference that sets them apart, both have limited color palettes that combine some neutral colors (fukase's off-white, black, and brown, heron's greys, muted teal, and tans) with a brighter color to pop out (fukase's bright red, heron's aqua seen on his collar + headphones).

flower and heron's relationship has previously been described as somewhat sibling-like, and it does definitely come off that way: there might be disagreements and rivalry but there's some calm nice/silly moments and genuine care & concern. they share a lot of similarities, but one could note how their relationship parallels that of heron & makarov's - flower occasionally takes on the more cheery and bubbly role in comparison to heron sometimes being the more serious and quiet one, which is seen reversed with the brothers. in spite of quarreling over small, petty little things sometimes, heron and flower seem to make up much easier and not hold any long-lasting resentment towards each other. i ofc know the heron & makarov situation is more complicated and it would make sense for it to be more strained given all that's happened, even in spite of heron forgiving his brother. but i do also wonder if it's been difficult for flower to try and calm heron down on certain occasions, seeing how he's also prone to spirals of his own thoughts that are hard to pull him out of, in a way very similar to his own brother. something sorta ironic there maybe

piko's interesting, pretty much the wild card here. his characterization does seem to vary quite a bit: he can be very playful and cutesy but also kind of a downer, as well as an angry little guy and a bit more ominous/spooky at times. there was a noteworthy point mentioned in this post though regarding how piko sees heron: heron reminds him of his younger self and wants to spare him of the pain that comes with getting your naive dreams of fame and popularity crushed. they're both very similar to each other, from the moodiness to being drawn—sometimes together—in a lot of pieces w/ similar subject matter (both have a fair share of lighthearted doodles as well as darker ones, more so in specific comparison with other characters), and taking the previously mentioned piko thoughts on heron, makes things a little bit sadder... maybe piko's current passive-aggressive and somewhat angry attitude is a mask he's developed over the years to protect himself from getting hurt more, though you can get to his nicer side if he trusts you enough. heron sometimes seems like a slight, cruel opposite of this: being nice and trusting others a bit too easily, but then breaking down emotionally in realizing his choices and impulsive actions, which might scare some people away. i want them to be happy kajhskj but i do wonder if, in spite of how much heron might look up to him, piko really feels the same way. i'm sure he does care about him, but... feelings is complicated. also i wasn't gonna touch on too much of this since i'm aware its not canon, but there's also the whole tall piko thing and how that version of piko specifically interacts with heron. that relationship in particular seems to represent an idealization: some sort of true happiness that'll come once there's an acceptance of the self, and a real willingness to accept help and be vulnerable to allow oneself to be healed... but again that's not canon and might not ever happen so, rip

and of course... there's len. i touched upon this in that original headcanon post but i did still wanna bring it up a little here. something i thought was interesting in looking back at a lot of your art was that most times, len is depicted in group settings; he's rarely seen alone and almost always interacting with someone else in some way. and generally he seems quite concerned, even more so in his interactions w/ heron. aside from the obvious fear of getting mauled to death probably lmao, he also seems to genuinely care about heron and worries about him. i think its worth noting that len is the first person heron sees after "waking up" here, and how he's the only one actually putting a hand on heron there in second-to-last panel. but again, even if len does have good intentions it is clear heron doesn't seem to be on the best terms with him. this piece has always been particularly intriguing to me, pairing what we see happening with the title. makes me think heron's blaming len for what happened to him, that it's len's fault somehow he ended up like this. a big thing also that's part of the len getting mauled thing is... len getting dismembered and eaten. i'm not gonna say too too much b/c i'm sure nobody wants to hear my cannibalism rambling but symbolically... "you are what you eat" yk? as mentioned with piko, heron seems to look up to a lot of the well-known vsynths and wants to achieve a status like them. and ofc len's arguably one of the most popular vocaloids with lot of fame and recognition. heron's design itself is said to take some inspo from len's outfit, and in general (like i mentioned in the original hc post), just wanting to be so much like someone, wanting what they have but not getting it, that might understandably drive someone to rage, and the mauling/dismembering/eating is the violent culmination of those feelings of envy. one last bonus point in terms of visuals too: yellow is the complimentary color to blue (ok ik heron's blues lean more towards blue-grey or aqua but shhhh), the literal opposite of it on the color wheel.

overall i feel heron honestly fits right in with the memesquad; everyone's personalities sort of compliment and mesh well with each other, which creates a fun dynamic that's really sweet to see. i think its really cool how you managed to make him fit in so well and how a lot of his interactions with the others make a lot of sense and are interesting to see, in happy moments as well as more serious/sad ones. sometimes i do really forget he's not a vsynth [yet?] so its surreal. ur doing a really good job tho, keep heronposting we love to see it

#ask #sorry this took so long to answer shkjghskjg 😭😭 a lot has been going on lately #i realize now this is more character relationships/comparisons and stuff rather than contrasts necessarily... oops.#i apologize in general if this makes like no fuckin sense 😭😭😭 my lit analysis shit always sounds better in my head than irl #there's more i could've put here but i was already struggling on how to phrase certain things properly so we'll leave it here for now #tho tbh: fucking around and not really knowing what youre doing will honestly lead you to some of the greatest shit youve made #<- thats a really weird fucking art/writing tip that ive learned over the years and it still fucks me up everytime but fr sometimes.#some of the best shit ppl have come up w/ was born purely out of messing around and improvising so. winging it is a solid development tip

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hrtbreakanniversary · 2 years

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STARLIGHT ✧ peter parker [1]

summary: its called the first day jitters

pairing: peter parker (mcu) x reader

word count: 6.8k

warnings: nothing but fluff, Y/N may seem a little daft, not proofread so bear with me if there is mistakes. minor nwh spoilers, takes place about two years after

Chapter One: Acquaintances

I. Move In Day

They say that 21 is a prime year.

You could go to clubs without getting that stupid stamp on your hand. You could legally drink now without the worry of getting your birthday party shut down because of said despicable acts. There's many things you can do.

But they could never prepare you with adulthood.

No. Not when five years had passed because of the blip. When you were the only family member to be have been “dusted”. Your family grows without you. Your younger siblings now either older than you or close enough to be as old as you. Successful in their own ways with ways with one being an aspiring artist. Galleries along the coast with her paintings hung in the display rooms of Ikea and above dinner tables of well endowed families. The other planning to pursue a career in computer science with ivy leagues lining up to persuade her to come to their school.

Now she was in the middle.

And it was so suffocating.

One year at the local university just off the side of the freeway, she couldn't handle it anymore. Coming home to strangers. She needed to leave and rightfully so, she did.

Didn't take much asking.

Money was given. No questions, no answers.

There were two things she wished.

She wished her parents could've put up a fight. Begged her to stay.

She wished she could've asked them about how much it was to live in the East Coast before she left.

Rent is soaring. 4 thousand for a small apartment that had its bed where you eat the dinner? Not at all surprised though. It was 2021 and everyone wants to live here. Sorting through the multiple layer of paperwork laid out in the desk in front of her, she quickly signed her signatures to get it over with.

Pottermore was right. She definitely was a Gryffindor for signing the lease without reading the fine lines.

Grumpy Mr. John Flores, the landlord, almost crumbled the paper when he took the papers away. It's fascinating to her how many people she's met so far already in this city that hate their jobs. Humming along to a tune that she distinctly remembered from her taxi drive, she picked up her cardboard box and the handle of her suitcase, pulling it along behind her in a constant beat.

Tipping left and right, her head lifted above the box to watch she was headed. And hopefully that was towards the elevator.

"Okay, you got this. Just one foot in front of another, no rush. " Self motivation. That's the best way to go at it. Leaning up again to check where she was, she noticed that she had successfully made it to the foyer. Only three more steps, you got this, girl.

But it was as if the Earth had shifted and she felt an imbalance in the floor tile, her feet slipping over a bump. If she weren't carrying 15 pounds of knick knacks, she could've easily maintained that balance. But gravity was doing its job of pulling down mass to the center of the Earth. She had mentally intended to yell out the phrase," Going down!" but instead had actually said it out loud accidentally, already feeling the hard stares from the other residents doing their business in the lobby.

Preparing for the loud smack of the box hitting the floor and the following embarrassment of picking up all her fallen items, she squeezed her eyes shut for the worst. "Oh." Instead she was met with a force pushing her up and the weight being lifted up from her arms. If this was a sitcom, cheers and claps would ring through the studio but the room remained silent as the unknown figure walked with no struggle to the elevator door. Judging by their shape, it was a male.

"Hey!" She waved her hand as if he was going to turn around but his body disappeared into the crowd of persistent residents requesting that the owner do something about the clogged pipes. A couple of them, especially a middle aged couple, stared at her as if she were crazy, "Thanks, I guess." Whispering softly to herself with her eyes casted down onto the floor, walking carefully and slowly to the elevators.

Now why had they had acted like she had seen a ghost?

The store bought cookies that she decorated perfectly on the pink tray she bought from the dollar tree down the street. So far all her neighbors in the hall were nice enough to take the cookies. Now here she was standing in front of an unopened door, whistling to a show tune from a black and white film that played earlier this morning.

Time passed and passed and as much as she hated to admit it, she gave up.

Placing the tray of cookies onto the floor and stepping back into her opened apartment. But as soon as she shut the door, she heard another open.

Scrambling to peek through the peep hole, she saw the door from across the hall slowly open. A blurry silhouette of a boy leaning over to pick up the tray of cookies before he just as quickly shut the door as if he was never there.

Interesting.

Third day and cousin Rosie from Dad's side had finally arrived with the truck with all her belongings. Knowing she would go back during the holidays, she didn't pack a lot... 8 boxes wouldn't be considered a lot right?

Sweat dripped down from the crown of her hairline to the crook of her neck. The New York weather causing her to strip down from her hoodie and sweats to a pair of zebra shorts and a loose tank top. It was far too hot for her self conscious thoughts to get the best of her.

Multiple missed calls have rung through the apartment since she set up the home phone. Most likely from her young siblings or the Fitness program she just recently signed up for that she would most likely never use because commitment to hobbies are a hard thing to do.

One last box just in time for the sun lower itself to let the moon take over. The hour that creates that perfect hue that shined through her curtains. Wiping the water from her brow, she swung open the door, unaware of the presence behind the door. It was too late as a gasp slipped through her lips.

Thank goodness for the person's fast reflexes, they were able to quickly grab the door before it hit them in their face. Y/N rushed around the door to apologize profusely for her carelessness but her apology was stunted when she saw the stranger.

Almost starstruck.

He was just so... pretty. His messy curls perched perfectly on top of his head. His brown eyes entrancing. Stuck in them, she was. Hypnotized, the words that she wanted to say blanked.

Snapped out of her trance by his sudden movements, she watched his toned back move towards the door across the hall. His hands jiggling with keys to find the right key. One and one clicked together, his back vaguely familiar from this morning. Oh my gosh, he's the one who helped with the falling box. "Hey, superboy!" The browned hair male stopped his movements at the girl's sudden outburst, whether it was because of the nickname or he was just surprised was unknown to her but she continued on" Thanks for helping me out earlier. Really saved me from cracking my skull open."

Upon hearing her thank you, she could see the side of his face turn towards her. Lips moving to speak but instead of hearing his voice, Y/N heard a wolf whistle come not more than 3 doors down. The culprit being John Flores. John Flores Jr. "Now this is something worth living here for." In all his sleazyness in his walk, the man had stepped closer to the pair. Jutting out his stomach with his body leaned up on the wall. "So young and innocent you are. Mamas, where you from?"

"California." Her voice soft and quiet to the point that John Jr leaned forward with a playful frown," Sorry, sweetheart. I didn't get that."

"I-I'm from San Diego."

"S-San Diego?" He mocked her stuttering tone," Oh the sunny city, right? Lots of girls just like you?" Unknown to her as her eyes traveled around the room in hopes to get out of his awkward conversation, his eyes were trailing down her outfit to the slight cleavage that pecked out from the hem of her shirt because of her crossed arms. The meat of her tummy that peeked out through the shortness of her tank top.

But the quiet male through this all saw it all. Disgust running through his veins.

Superboy had finally opened his door, disappointment clear in Y/N's face. She saw that he was her age and that's suppose to make it 25% easier to make friends around here. Now she would have to

"How about you take a break down in the swimming pool? It'll feel just like the beaches at home. Get dressed in that cute bathing suit of yours. Pool's big enough just for you and I. Enough room to move around if you know what I-"

"You don't pay rent, Flores." Superboy spoke with a scoff," Only residents are allowed to access those."

"Parker, shut your mouth before I shove your foot in there."

Superboy whose name was now Parker nonchantely shrugged his shoulders. Almost as if this was something that had occurred often. It was easy to see that Parker had an upper hand because he was a customer and if John Flores Jr caused his father to lose a customer, it would be the end of him. Knowing Mr. Flores had the anger that lasted as long as a wooden incense.

"And don't give that little stare. One day, Parker, you're going to regret having such a smart mouth."

"You know it would help a lot if you helped me carry these!" A strong voice called from the elevator. Shit, she forgot about Rosie. Y/N rushed to the curly haired red head whose bangs were stuck to her forehead because of the sweat. "Y/L/N, you suck." She heaved through heavy breaths, leaning over the tall box to catch her breath.

Y/N just simply sympathetically smiled. In the corner of her eye, she checked to see her neighbor was still there but all she saw now was an empty hallway and the closed door of apartment 6196.

II. Orientation

What she expected were for bright streamers. Envisioning that set up along the way to entrance were booths to clubs, different sororities and fraternities, and scholarships that students could apply for on the spot.

But it was boringly plain.

From two feet away, all Y/N could see was a small table set with a cardboard sign attached by scotch tape that had a chicken scratch of handwriting that wrote out as... welcome? Shaking her head, she tried to think positively. Never judge a book by it's cover is a saying she's heard countless amount of times and now is the best time to use it.

Trying her best to hide her unimpressed face which wasn't hard with the sun shining down hard on her face, she walked closer to the large crowd of students.

In this crowd of students, there were already small cliches formed. Friends that already knew each other or some people who were sociable enough to make friends in less than 30 minutes. It was hard to insert yourself into something that is already established especially when they send strange glares at you for excitedly raising your hand up to wave at them. Of course, she brushed off the ugly attitudes and moved along to see what else was in store.

Walking down more of the courtyard, she herself on the pavement line to move past the many students, one crowd that stood out to her the most was a group of girls surrounding an area. So naturally she was intrigued because commotion = something entertaining. Gathering herself onto her tiptoes, centered in the middle was a caucasian boy, his hair pushed back with gel with a smirk printed upon his lips. His posture showing that that he held much confidence, maybe even too much.

She's felt like she's seen him before while scrolling through her explore page on Instagram. Something related with the Avengers.

Her eavesdropping confirmed that thought when three students whisper shouting amongst themselves about the male in the front.

"He knew Iron Man?"

"He's basically his kid."

"No way! You think he's going to take over as his replacement?"

"Not after that recent controversy with Spiderman. He was making killer drones."

"Here you go again with your 'Mysterio was right' bullshit."

"I don't know what the hell you are talking about but he's fucking hot."

She leaned forward to ask them what his name was but in her peripheral view, she saw a familiar figure. Superboy! I mean she learned his last name is Parker but what's the fun in that. Not that Parker is a boring name but Superboy just slipped out much more easily. Excitement ran through her veins, turning on the heels of her feet to follow after him.

Once her feet had caught up to his, she clasped his hands on to his shoulders, "Superboy!" Surprisingly, he didn't jump which was kind of creepy because he just looked at her with an eyebrow raised. She rambled on with her hands clasped together, inching closer and closer," I didn't know you go here. What's your major? Mine is social work but I don't feel that good about it. I honestly was going to come in undecided but I already had my GE's done so I just decided to go along with it but then-" She stepped down from her position on the curbside when he realized he was just staring at her," Oh, do you not remember me? I'm your neighbor! The one across the hall. I just moved in last week.".

Like all their previous encounters, Peter had opened his mouth to speak but was interrupted from Y/N taking a look at his papers and letting a very audible loud gasp," Ah ha!"

"So your name is Peter?" She looked back at him through the corner of her eye," Peter Parker went to the park to park his parked car where all the other parked cars were parked but there was no parking for him to pa-"

Peter stood in disbelief, almost impressed before he began his walk again except this time faster, hands tucked into the wide pockets of his jeans.

"Superboy, wait!" Not caring about the stares she received when she put her arm back around his shoulder.

"So what are you going here for?"

Peter raised a finger to his lips to shush her before one of the student ambassadors leading them would hear her. He felt a judge in the side of his hip, a mental groan forming in his head and responded swiftly under his breath, "Physics."

"Oh that's so cool. So you like measure how fast things go or something?"

"Yeah, around that area."

"How about this?"

Punching the air in front of Peter's face, causing him to pull his head back before the female punched his head off.

"So?"

Peter shook his head and only focused on what the student in the front had to say about the different buildings surrounding them. Y/N was adamant though, holding her hand out in front of his face again," What about Spiderman? Have you ever just thought of how fast he's going? Do you think he was to like run backwards before swinging for some momentum."

"I don't think Spiderman has time to-" Before Y/N punched the air in front of him again which of course he had enough time to move his head fast enough.

"Am I inteuppting you two? Should I stop?"

At just the sound of the voice, she was already fearing for her life, she looked towards the junior in the front. Though in the same year, she was still fairly intimidated by the more experienced college student. Her red painted lips parted into a smirk, staring at the duo.

Peter struggled underneath her grip because the female had pushed herself behind him in the attempt to hide. Peter nervously shook his head all while moving his hands behind his back to grab at the girl who was moving around to get out of his reach.

"Well now that our attention is else where," her voice sharp and pointed," let's go ahead and begin with our icebreaker activity. So we'll begin with our name, major, age, and something a little interesting about ourselves." Motioning to herself," I'll start it off. My name is Felicia Hardy. My major is criminal justice, I'm 21 and I guess... I'm pretty good at breaking locks." Her laugh coming out as harmonious tune.

Whilst being scared of her, Y/N couldn't help be drawn to the girl's charm. The group had slowly formed into a circle as they introduced themselves one by one. She couldn't help but be in her own world that she didn't notice that everyone was now looking at her, distracted by the birds and greenness of the trees and field. So she quickly ran through the easy questions but stumping on the very last one.

Before a bright idea came to her head.

Reaching out to grasp onto Peter's shoulder who didn't even jump at her touch, with a proud grin," And Peter Parker is my best friend."

Peter almost choked on his spit.

"Excuse me." A hefty sigh," Pardon. Yeah, just going to slip through here. Okay. Okay."

Moving onto the concrete bench besides the unsuspecting brunette, she set down her tower of Oreos and crackers. Squishing herself into the somewhat crowd table, she finally settled down when both her arms were able to rest.

Now she could've sat anywhere else.

There was even an empty table right across from her.

But Y/N found herself to be pretty comfortable right besides Peter here.

And she figured he wasn't too bothered because she could feel him angling his body so that she could comfortably sit down without squishing her body together.

"Thanks." She whispered but he only continued to write in his notebook without even glancing up.

In the middle of nibbling on the chocolate cookie, a shadow casted over them. The two looked up to see the boy who could be a famous influencer, smiling down at them with his hands tucked into the jeans of his pockets," Hello, freshman."

For the first time in the past hour, Peter had spoken up,"I'm actually a junior."

"Me too!" Y/N pointed," College credits in high school really helped. I mean I got a few general educations done at my other college but most of my needed GE's were done at-"

"Right, that's amazing. I completely respect that way. Especially since it's the cheaper way. Well, welcome to Empire State University. My name is Harley Keener but you may know me already."

"No, I don't." Grumbles from Peter. Harley nervously scratched the back of his neck,"That's completely normal. But straight to the point, I hope that if any of you has questions, you would come to me and not that heathen over there."

"I heard that, Keener Weiner." Felicia threw a bird at the brunette. While the attention had already drifted away from her, anybody could see her trailing eyes wander down the side frame of Peter's toned body that was obvious even under the sweater and jeans that covered his body. In the middle of it all, Y/N shifted uncomfortably in her seat before forcefully pushing herself to react to the weird nickname. Peter on the other hand was irked.

"Keener Weiner." The giggle that passed through her lips, the elbow of her arm judging Peter on the side. The sudden sound gained Harley's attention, the cocky boy leaning his body weight against the table," Y/N right?" His sultry tone filling the hair," You're pretty cute, sweet cheeks. Can I call you that? Sweetcheeks? I heard you call this guy superboy earlier. Can I get a nickname too?"

"Y/N is fine." She keenly slipped the chopped fruits she didn't want anymore onto Peter's plate while softly smiling up at Harley.

"Okay, Y/N. Cute name all the still." Harley officially sat down but like a seesaw, Peter stood up at the same time. Wordlessly walking away from the crowd with his hands tucked away.

While Harley continued to talk more and more about who knows what, Y/N's attention stayed trained on the boy's back who slipped through the crowded area.

III. Dozen Doughnut Holes

With the frustrating amount of syllabuses along with the ones online, the university life is already hectic. Taking a deep and heavy breath filled with stress, Y/N jumbled up all the papers that were scattered around the round table before settling down on just trying her best to find her textbooks for free online because she wasn't trying to spend a single paycheck on something she isn't going to go to use unless it's final weeks.

"First week?"

With her hair crunched up in her hands, she looked up to a boy who had almost a bowl cut. "Uh yeah."

"Ah, how's that going? I go back next week."

Now she hadn't planned spilling her dreadful week but here she was telling a stranger about why is coffee seven dollars? She found out the stranger's name was Ned and the curly haired girl with bags under her eyes who had just walked in to begin her shift was also his friend. They both go to MIT which was crazy to her because she always felt like that was a college that only existed in movies. Nobody in the west coast was going there.

He pulled out his wallet and showed a photo of both MJ and him in high school at a trip they took to Europe to show her that the two have been friends since forever. Y/N noticed that the picture was angled in a way that seemed like there was suppose to be somebody there on right side of MJ. But she brushed it off and figured it was just the way the person took the picture. Maybe to capture the scenery.

"Wow, you have been best friends for so long? How did you even get so close? Honestly, I kind of struggle with that." Clicking her tongue against the roof of her mouth," And yes, I know, me moving here doesn't help."

"Sometimes you just got to get away." Ned scratched his chin as if he was trying to think," I know we got close to each other due to a mutual... I just don't know who..."

Right as Y/N was about to reassure Ned that it was okay, the bell jingled. Both of their attention looked to see who entered and- it was Peter! Y/N excitedly raised her hand up to wave but Peter made a beeline to the counter to order.

Must be in a hurry. Maybe it'll be an easy conversation starter when she bumps into him later tonight.

"You know him?" Ned used his thumb to point over to Peter. Y/N nodded which Ned returned," He's a pretty cool guy. We see him every-time we come back down from school. Always asks us how we're doing." Taking a bite out of his sprinkled donut," MJ says he comes in everyday but doesn't do much except order a cup of coffee so I guess we're kind of friends but we don't know much about him."

Y/N only stared on. Watching Peter's attitude do a complete 180 towards MJ. He was smiling. Laughing.

"How about you?"

"Huh?"

"How do you know him?"

"Oh, he's just... he's my neighbor."

"Must be a local. I'm honestly surprised I've never seen him before... wait... I take that back. New York is a big big city."

While Ned continued to ramble on about the different areas to visit and possibly the best places to get the infamous pizza they have there, Y/N watched as Peter had reached forward for his coffee. His hands brushing against MJ's and she swore on her very observational skills that she saw his cheeks burn a light pink and his ears a dark red.

It doesn't take much to put two and two together.

"Order for Tee."

Tee was an alias that Y/N came up with me because she didn't want to deal with the awkward moments she would have to repeat herself. But here she found herself in another awkward situation on if she should interrupt this little moment that her neighbor and the girl she just met a week ago who makes a really good macchiato are sharing.

"Order for Tee!" The older woman screamed louder, causing everyone to stare around.

Reluctantly, she walked up to grab her drink and she was going to sue the universe for having the pick up area in the same area as the order. Maybe if she kept her head down, Peter wouldn't even see her. But the inevitable happened when she saw the infrequent expression drop from Peter's face.

Well shit. "Hi."

"Uh right." Peter pulled out a 20 dollar bill and handed it to MJ. "I'll see you around. Keep the change."

And he walked away without another word.

Confused was an understatement.

IV. Mail Buddies

"So I bumped into Felicia the other day when I went into the office to deal with my financial aid. She invited me to a party that the frat is throwing for the beginning of the school year. I was wondering if you wanted to come-"

"I'm okay, thank you though." His eyes trained on getting that piece of mail that was holding on for life to a small crack within the small box.

Nails clinking against the metal of the locker, she hummed a small tune before trying even more to convince him.

"I mean it's a great way to make friends. We've been here for a week and I feel you and I only have each other at the moment."

"I don't really need friends." Peter shrugged," I don't really have time for them."

"Uhm-" Should it be brought up? He didn't even know that she was there? But Y/N knew that yesterday could be contributing to why he doesn't want to go. After all, it didn't hurt to try. "But you seemed sad about those friends from yesterday. I mean they're going away to MIT and moving on, so maybe you could try to as well?"

"How do you know they're going to MIT? Were you eavesdropping on me?"

"I'm not saying to like move on move on. I mean it doesn't take that quick to make new friends. But of course, taking that first step will definitely help a lot. So maybe coming along with me tomorrow will that first step."

Through all her ramble, she didn't notice the vein that was threatening to pop and the clenched jaw from the boy in front of her.

"Listen, you don't know me, understand?" He suddenly snapped, his voice a low tone but his accent thick. His face then softened before letting out a sigh, "I'm sorry for snapping. But this... you and I or me and you thing, it doesn't exist. We aren't friends. We aren't close to friends. So just leave me alone."

Blinking in pure surprise. She hadn't been expecting this kind of attitude at all. She honestly wasn't expecting any type of reaction when it came to Peter so she was completely thrown off by his hostility.

Peter was already walking away when she finally came back to her senses from the loud slap of his mailbox closing.

She wanted to run after him. Ask him why? Why did what she brought up bother him so much? But the line was already crossed and there was no coming back.

V. Pizza Boy

"I brought cookies! They're freshly baked." And that was a promise. She spent till 2 a.m. cooking all 100 of them. Maybe she'd achieve better luck at making friends here if she actually baked the cookies.

Harley took the clear container with a small smile, opening the door wider for Y/N. Now it was unknown if he had actually heard her or not because the music was turned to the max of which the speakers could barely handle.

The Alpha Zeta Phi was located in the middle of the campus between their sister house and competing house. A casual house party was more like a crazy one with how full the area was. She set down the cookies before her hand was swiftly pulled by Felicia, who she had no idea where she came from.

To a much quieter area of the house, she saw many familiar faces. The two girls she saw with Felicia at orientation. Susie and Rachel were twins that seemed to everything together. Towards the other couch sat Harley and another boy she didn't know but the constant shout of Jared as he chugged down his white claw gave her a hint of what it would be.

Felicia slid into the empty spot besides Harley, slipping one or two pieces of popcorn before she eventually sat down. Harley leaned over and held out a red cup to Y/N. His other hand drifting down the exposed skin that her red halter top hadn't covered up but judging by the strong smell that radiated off of it, Y/N pushed it away with a swift shake of her head.

"It's just pineapple juice and vodka."

"Oh, I'm only 20."

She didn't know what was so funny that made the group around her laugh but she played along, even holding her hand over her mouth to play the role.

"Your Peyton friend is pretty cute." Felicity poked Y/N square in her shoulder with her manicured finger. "Where is he now?"

"He's not even cute. Y'all just want the attention of every male." Jared's voice dripping off a tone that reeked jealously as he walked around the room.

Susie and Rachel giggled, their heads tilting in sync to the right. "Yeah, you should have brought him with you."

If Y/N had a pen and a paper, she would pitch this idea to horror movie creators or writers because she felt like she was in one.

"Speaking of Peyton-"

"It's Peter." Y/N cut in with a clear of her throat. She could feel them looking at her but she could only take a gulp of the bubbly drink before Felicity continued," We don't see much of him, do we? Like I've seen him in class once in a while but he's always gone the second the Professor dismisses us."

A bad taste formed in her mouth at the boy being brought up. Not that she felt any ill feeling towards him but more like she still felt guilty for last night.

"Asshole thinks he's better than everyone else." Jared tutted in from his higher position on the arm of the couch besides Harley. She frowned at that accusation. Honestly, she just needed to wash her face under some cold water to calm down. Whilst she did announce to the group that she was going to the bathroom, they didn't seem to care. Still stuck in their own conversation.

And they continued to be even after she returned, a paper towel patting the remaining drips of water. Drifting away from her primary plan, the plan now was to just stay for another 10 minutes before catching an uber to take home. Bracing herself to jump into the uncomfortable situation that she brought herself into, footsteps were halted when she heard her name and Peter's.

"I can't believe Felicia invited that weirdo." Mocking a high pitch voice that was deniably untrue to the true tone, Rachel scoffed," I'm only 20, cut that bullshit out!"

Jared's groggy voice cut in, "I'm just glad that Parker kid didn't tag along. Like come on, I don't know what you all see in him to be thirsting over his ass so much. Who knows how much of a buzzkill he could be? He stands with his shoulders so high like he owns the place. But no one gives a shit who he is or cares who he is. He acts like he could-"

"You don't even know him." Y/N pushed Jared from the back, almost causing him to tip forward.

"Hey, what's your problem?" Jared stood up quickly, standing tall over the girl but unphased, she glared," Peter is a good person. Don't take out your insecurities on him. "

The room had silenced. Their next actions wary on what to do next.

"Insecurties? What the hell are you talking about?"

"Jared." Harley spoke with a pointed tone, but Jared pushed on, poking Y/N square in the shoulder," What insecurities are you going on about?" whilst pronouncing her name in a way that wasn't even close to what it actually was which honestly ticked her off even more.

"I mean it's not his fault that these girls don't find you attractive. Hell they know you and you're not even an inch of what they want."

"Oh, you'd shut your mouth if you know what's best for you." Jared scoffed," Why are you even defending his ass? Didn't you tell Hardy over here that he said no to coming with you? I don't know if you noticed but I guess that just means you're not that cool for him."

"Gosh, you're such a kid. Cool? Who even gives a shit about that anymore? Admit it. You're just jealous that Peter is a way better person that you could ever be even though nobody in this fucking room knows who the hell he is but you, Jacob or Jared or whatever fuck your name is, in the end, you're just a bitch."

She could feel how infuriated he was but he didn't think he'd go as far as to hit her. Which is why her eyes were shut closed as Jared's fist swung back. Preparing herself for the pain that never came, she slitted her eyes open.

With bleary vision, she made out another shape of new being in the room. Their grip strong on Jared's arm. Blinking multiple times, she gasped when she realized who it was.

Embarrassment ran quickly through veins, her cheeks turning hot. Had Peter really heard everything she just said? How more obsessed could she look infant of him?

The room was spinning and faces blurred as she rushed out of the room, hearing Felicia call out her name but she couldn't breathe. She had to get out of there.

With his eyes following her tail, Peter roughly let go of Jared's hand before pulling out a payment terminal from his bag wrapped around his waist," Can I please know whose paying for these pizzas? I was sent up here and this is the only room with people."

"Fuck-" Jared was quick to move to follow the girl out but Peter was quicker when he grabbed the collar of Jared's polo.

"I've got six more orders to do so I'd advise you leave it before you make me lose my tips." Peter held up the terminal again, eyes darting around the room. Soon enough, Harley took the initiative all while mumbling under his breath about spending an afternoon worths of buying snacks just for someone to order more food.

Y/N paced back and forth in her living room- actually would this even considered a living room? Her bed was in the same area as where she cooked and ate. So would it be her bedroom? Ah, back to the point, how was she going to approach Peter? Now honestly she was debating if she should even talk to Peter because he honestly hates her and probably hates her even more now.

Okay, you know what? Just leave a note outside his door explaining yesterday's events. No biggie. There's nothing wrong with what you did. You were being a good human and defending somebody but honestly you don't know even know much about the person even to- you know what just go outside and knock on his door to see if he even responds then you can determine if you should even say anything or not.

As she opened her front door, she was surprised to see Peter already standing there, looking down at his feet. His lips parted but curved up as if he was talking to himself and a paper jumbled up in his hands.

"Were you practicing to say something to me?" Y/N teased. Peter shook his head immediately and shoved the paper into his pockets but the crumbled up paper had caused a creased outline where it stayed.

"I don't know what you're talking about." Peter coughed. "So-"

"I'm sorry." Both had mused together, taking a step back in surprise.

"What are you apologizing for?", He asked with genuine confusion. "It's me that should be apologizing. I'm sorry for being such an ass to you these past few weeks. You don't deserve it, no one deserves it."

"Well, it's what I deserve for being so invasive. I'm sorry for coming off so strong-"

"Hey, no. there's nothing wrong with that and you weren't. I-I just... I'm not-" Peter scratched the back of his head. Y/N didn't even push it when he suddenly changed what he was going to say,"You don't need to apologize, you're not doing anything wrong."

"I shouldn't have over stepped the lines and practically tried forcing you to do something that you didn't want to. It's me and I'm just not someone you could be friends with."

"I think you're wrong about that, Superboy," Y/N leaned forward with her ams crossed, " Because you're my best friend."

"You're still onto that?"

"Superboy? Or best friend? Because both are true."

"The friend part-"

"Correction: best friend. Wow so you can claim that you're a Superboy but not my best friend. How pompous of you."

"I take it back. You ruined it all." Peter sighed, backing up from her door. "I take back everything I just said."

Y/N knew it was all jokes, a wide grin tattooed on her face as she watched him maintain a stoic expression back to his door. Peter had opened his door and was about to walk in before Y/N stood up straight from her door, chirping out a, " goodnight!"

It wouldn't be surprising if he had ignored her but at the 1/3 mark from a shut door, Peter peeked around the wooden door, whispering out a," goodnight."

It never got easier.

Choosing between the pad see ew that MJ liked from that Thai place near his own old apartment or the sandwiches from Delmar's that he now had to repeat every time he went in because the older man did not know what his usual was anymore, Peter settled on sandwiches.

It never got easier.

Seeing the stone that wrote her name.

The other half of his sandwich sat perched on a small wooden table he had bought from the dollar tree as he took a bite. Dammit, it was cold. With a lot on his mind, it's been harder for him to focus on anything so it wasn't surprising when it took him forever to call for a taxi because they just kept passing.

"Sorry, I haven't been visiting, May."

He reached for the bouquet of white flowers, placing it next to the bread and the other flowers he had brought earlier that week.

"It's getting a bit harder to visit you everyday with how much Mr. Aziz's is working me because I started classes. I'm sure another person can deliver pizzas."

A leaf had fallen from the tree above

"I feel like made a mistake, May."

The leaf lifted from the ground from the hard wind that flew past.

"You see... there's this girl." Peter sighed," I know she had good intentions and I may have snapped at her on accident. But she just reminded me so much of someone."

The leaf joined its friends, all spinning in a circle.

"And I just don't want her to get her involved in all of this. Don't want her to hurt... don't want her to get hurt like that person did." He sighed,"Do you think I should try talking it out with her? Maybe even apologize to her? It wouldn't hurt right?" The wind passed through his flowy locks," Of course you do.". Taking a bite of his sandwich again as the leaves had drifted off into the air.

"I really don't understand why I thought mustard was so good in the past?"

taglist: purplemeetsblue heyimtrashtbh lazysheepperfection valeriasannchez doctorsgirl262 @sapphireplums @ritz-hell-hotel (lmk if I missed you)

a/n: who does y/n remind Peter of gasp??? and my fav fancast for ms felicia hardy <3 tati gabrielle!! p.s. i hâd no idea they were in uncharted together until I watched it last weekend and damnnn. omg no way my writers block is finally thawing out,, letS GOOO

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