#the way we could have avoided that

[darlingod]

Cardan: *brings his ex back to live on the land and then exiles Jude who he married the night before & who just got back from enduring over a month of torture*

Cardan: *does not have any doubts that Jude could possibly misinterpret this situation*

#out of context just calls out to me I’m sorry #also poor Jude saved his life the day before too #Cardan and Jude not realizing how insecure the other feels about themselves in their relationship is just #I understand Cardan’s perspective I just love giving him shit for this #like you created the biggest misunderstanding that has ever been misunderstood #the way we could have avoided that #fuck you too Lady Asha you miserable waste of space #like ew keep out of ur sons love life I cannot believe u did that #Jude is the only reason that bitch was ever out in about in the first place and Asha did the opposite of paying her back #UGH like Cardan ripped out his heart and put it in those letters #and you just destroyed them?? #alarming #excruciating #distressing #cardan greenbriar #the wicked king #jude duarte

[guardian-angle22]

911: Lone Star | Carlos "I Don't Avoid" Reyes

#911 lone star #911lsedit #carlos reyes #tk strand #andrea reyes #full disclosure the andrea laughing gif is out of context. she doesnt laugh in response to that line. even tho she should have 100% #its more-so a representation of ME laughing uncontrollably while making this set #this set is me lovingly dragging his ass because that line was out of control hilarious given *gestures wildly above* #honestly there are probs some other ones I could have included somehow I just couldn't find a way to make them work smoothly #we love one (1) insanely repressed man who avoids all confrontation outside of his work and its carlos reyes #my gifs #911ls parallel #episode: s04e12 swipe left #episode: s02e02 2100° #episode: s02e04 friends with benefits #episode: s03e11 prince albert in a can #episode: s03e13 riddle of the sphynx #episode: s04e01 the new hotness

[puppyeared]

Why are ppl scared to call it what it is and say we’re still going thru covid on top of seasonal illness. Like. That’s pretty important right. I was watching the news and they were like oh yeah we have an unprecedented number of flu cases “as well as other sicknesses” without actually saying Covid. No announcement abt vaccinations or masking or anything. Also if I hear someone joking abt “war flashbacks” for mentioning covid I fucking hate u

#source: most of my family members are nurses and it was so bad for one of them they had to be put on a ventilator. in the hospital they #worked at. looking back I think I had a reason to feel a little offput by the shows of support early pandemic #with people tying blue ribbons around trees and lighting signs blue to support healthcare workers #I get that it was supposed to be moral support when we couldn’t do anything but follow health advisories #and it did matter to make them feel uplifted and do something than nothing. im not gonna deny that #but. you can still help now. u know that right. you still have a responsibility here #u can still mask up. u can still get vaxxed and call in sick to avoid infecting others #don’t leave it on healthcare workers to pick up the pieces just because they were doing it before. do u think they had a choice? #nobody likes picking up the slack for someone else and now that we have more tools to do smth couldn’t we just. do it???? #im not a virologist but i also feel like continuing to let it get worse by letting more mutations develop #could continue to set us back since this virus is pretty good at fucking us up long term and finding new ways to do that #while there are ppl still researching covid which is STILL A RELATIVELY NEW VIRUS. and studying possible treatment and cures #yapping #vent

[mishapen-dear]

tbh i think that even unwinnable fights should be winnable. some of the BEST fights i've ever run as a dm were ones i built kill the players (in a fun way. I had some cutscenes prepped so even the loss would be a different flavour of win)- but then they were clever bastards and managed to either win the fights or pull themselves out of trouble. I think it's perfectly fine to plan for a fight that players aren't supposed to win, but you need to let them. if they can't win, they can't lose, and the meaning of that encounter is diminished. do that too many times, and they stop trusting you to give them roleplay prompts and start expecting to sit there waiting while you drive the story for them.

but if they can win... if there is always the chance to win, no matter how impossible the odds, then they ALWAYS have hope. they always get invested. they feel the big emotions of success or the big emotions of failure, and you fucking Win as a dm/roleplay prompter/lead bastard.

#qsmp neg #qsmp crit #discourse #<- for blacklists #im not grumping or anything im just musing on like. the mechanics of why everyone is so upset about the latest fight #and how it can be avoided while still keeping these fights genuinely difficult and intense #its hard because there's so many players and they all have wildly different strengths and weaknesses #so someone who could take on the code easy needs that enemy scaled differently than someone who isn't a big fighter #but it's hard to do that in a world where they interact w the same enemy #and you only have so much man-power to cater to a big server like this one #and then you bring in the big powerful items that the players can and can't access but which the admins have ultimate power over #and the fact that some of the admins themselves have lag issues or aren't super great at pvp so they accommodate that with better gear #and it starts getting messy #but for the fights themselves yeah regardless of what armour or gear or killing-methods they use there should Always be a win condition #and idk maybe there was one and we just didn't get to see it #but if that win condition is 'parents sit in the safe room with their babies while the others are overrun' #then i think there are ways to build better win conditions #anyway i love game design and player/dm interactions qsmp hire me now i want to know your behind the scenes #jk im too busy to apply #but man. i wanna nerd out so bad that sometimes i think about it

[cacaocheri]

You should in fact infodump about poptropica, also have you considered doing a DCA Poptropica crossover to unite the interests together?

1) I love you so much dude I hope you're doing well 2) poptropica infodump would take AGES this thing has lore so I will spare you a ramble for now 3) I . HAVE NOT. BUT COULD YOU IMAGINE SUN AND MOON WITH THE BIG BOBBLE HEADS

no? because I can

oh my god they look so much more cursed than I expected I'm laughing my ass off

#guys new au? poptropica dca au anyone? #where they just look like this thats it #my art #dca fandom #sun fnaf #moon fnaf #also friend if you really DO want to hear a poptropica ramble #you have to ask about a specific island #because just dropping all of the lore is way too hard #like first decide if you want book lore or game lore #(thats right there is a book) #and then we go from there #i could tell you aaaaalll about my favorite island though #cryptids my beloved #harold mews ny beloved #OKAY OKAY BUT YEAH YOU GET THE POINT #i fr appreciate so much that you are always asking me to info dump about my interests though<33 i love you so much #just know this isn't me trying to avoid talking about it there's just SO MUCH to talk about its hard for me to focus! #but yes thank you again man <3 i love you hope you're doing well #we should chat again sometime #ask #poptropica

[detroitbecomeonline]

i just thought of the stupidest headcanon ever: deviant connor now attempts to greet hank with a hug every time ever since the chicken feed hug. he doesn't care. he's a deviant he can do what he wants. and if that means he opens his arms up for hank in the office and hank has to embarrassingly reject and swerve out the way and then get hugged from behind and then push him away-- lmao

second stupid headcanon: connor turns into a hugger after the chicken feed and he attempts to hug everyone instead of a handshake because hand = android greeting and hug = human greeting. he saw some teenage girls on the street hug each other why can't he do it. "captain fowler you wanted to speak with me?" leans in for a hug

#it's not that he doesn't get the picture but he likes messing with people #chris miller would give him 1 hug and the second time it would be weird and he avoids it #“perkins i'm glad you have visited the station today what can i help you with” opens his arms for a hug #gavin would punch him in the throat #tina would feel so awkward #hank would allow it on a crime scene but he'd stand there like a statue #no one can tell him to stop in a way that's effective because he's the best out of all of them at their jobs #ofc this is in a universe where hank keeps his job and connor stays with the dpd for whatever reason #the tracis come into the dpd to testify and connor gives them a handshake each and all the humans lose their minds and snap pencils #“nice to meet you christina warren” opens his arms #his face and tone stay the same #“i'm glad we could crack this case” in a deadpan tone and then he opens up to hug hank in celebration #this is so funny to me even tho it's so unrealistic let me live #dbh #mydbhbrain #mine #connor rk800

[queertemporality]

i have admitted a want and/or need. this is tantamount to admitting weakness. now i must go and fold my arms behind my back and contemplate the wall for the next six months

#post #i love this for me #i’ll be like ‘m-maybe we should hang out’ and then i have to go pretend I don’t have feelings for like 6 months #someone recently was like ‘it comes off like you don’t like people’ and im like huh wonder why that is #surely not my avoidant behaviors leading you to conclude that I don’t care #I do wish I could like um express literally anything without um wanting to crawl into a hole about it #like sorry! sorry I said that. I need to go become my father for a while. to cope. you know? #still obsessed with the way my one friend will be like ‘I love hanging out and talking to you’ #and an hour later my brain will be like ‘she basically said she hates you and she never wants to see you again’ #like can I live beyond the shadow of my mother

[cradle-of-darkness]

COOKIES OF DARKNESS NATION WE ARE OFFICIALLY BACK ��💪💪💪💪💪💪💪💪💪💪💪💪💪💪💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️

(long rambling in tags if u care)

#cookie run #licorice cookie #red velvet cookie #affogato cookie #I KNOW im late to this but i was at school ok 🙄 anyways i have a lot of thoughts #first off LICORICE UGH I MISSED HIM SO BAD IM SO HAPPY FOR HIM #his stats are so fascinating to me. i don't think anyone was expecting his strength to be that high #its pretty average but its still his best stat surprisingly #im shocked his strategy and puzzle solving are only 3. i think that's a strange decision to make them so low but I'm open to accepting it #maybe his avoidance/lack of ability to see the big picture contributes to the low scores? #his stats are so unexpected but I could get used to it. still i want an elaboration from devsis on these #i want them to show his strength in the show because i was expecting his strength to be like. 3 or 4 #but anywho. i think its very funny how affo is 0 strength. i love how its canon licorice could easily kick his ass in a fist fight #i really do love affo and im SO happy to see him with the cod fucking finally all we got with him as a cod until now was ODYSSEY 😭 #im so excited to see him work with the cod as an actual member. he's a very fun character for me #i cant wait for them to actually make him feel like one of the cookies of darkness its been over a year since he joined by now c'mon #im just so ecstatic that the cod are back. hopefully this is a good omen and will pave the way for more cod appearances soon #bcs u all know how i feel about the lack of cod for the better part of the past year. this better be their comeback i believe in them #😁😁😁😁😁😁 IM JUST SO HAPPY THIS IS THE BEST POSSIBLE OUTCOME IM SO HAPPY U HSVE NO IDEA I LITERALLY SCREAMED #btw ik crepe is there. but they're in a weird grey area of being a cod so i didn't post them BUT IM VERY HAPPY THEY'RE THERE TOO ‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️ #♦️charlie's miscellaneous

[thebirdarts]

Assorted Estinian's drawn from screenshots of the dragoon level 40-50 quests. [please click for better quality]

#thebirdarts #ffxiv estinien #ffxiv art #estinien wyrmblood #i had loads of fun drawing him! #some landscapes also from teh questline in the works #i call this style pencil whos that? its just me and paint roller #ok they have way to many sketch layers for how rough they look #but i just used the paint roller tool but even smaller #several times just devolving to hopefully form showing scribbles for the armour #its my new coping strategy to avoid speedruning artistsic burnout [trying to accurately draw the dragoon armour] #fun fact! because its all black its a bitch to understand whats going of unless your tablet is the brightness of teh sun #but tbh i could have just drawn him out of his armour with the sketches i did for that purpose #but thats scary #hes fused to his helmet #its like midnighters cowl #thst just the charterers face #at least we have a consistant hair colour for estinian tho #one day i will draw estinian not in his armour #for now you just get dragoon armour in diff colours and poses

[miss0atae]

Random thoughts about Pit Babe the series ep 10:

I was really waiting for this episode and I knew it would be filled with sadness and sorrow.

▪️Babe had a fight with Charlie before the race because his boyfriend was concerned about him. Babe thought Charlie didn't trust him and said some hard words to him. He was angry at him and it was their last conversation before the accident. Obviously, Babe was heartbroken. No one would want an argument to be the last conversation you have with anyone, even more when it is your lover. Babe really suffered in this episode. I said it before but I think Pavel really knows how to cry. He is a pretty crier. You do believe in his sadness and terrible loss just by looking at him. Of course, the sorrow was followed by anger and a will to get revenge. I feel sad for Babe because he lost his best friend, his father abandoned him, Tony took advantage of him and he had to lose the only person he ever loved and felt safe with. It was hard to watch him be utterly distraught.

▪️In the middle of all this drama, Jeff made a move on Alan because he has to wait until he decides to do it, he would have to wait an eternity. That kiss on the cheek was cute but I was expecting more! Alan is supposed to be in his thirties but he flirts like he is a pre-schooler. Jeff must really like him because I would have given up. He has been flirting a lot and Alan always seems to have this surprised Pikachu face when he finally understands what is going on. I wish they made their romance start earlier because we still have to wait until next week to get a proper kiss. At least, they are living in the same place. Proximity is the key to making the romance bloom.

▪️Kim finally was out of Tony's clutches. I hope it is because Kenta helped him get to Jeff but we never got confirmation. To be honest, I was surprised when Jeff brought him to Alan's house to protect him. It felt like they made some cuts in the episode and the rescue of Kim wasn't brought smoothly enough into the story. I don't know...

▪️Tony was again very abusing towards Kenta. It is getting harder and harder to see. This kind of constant abuse must be really hard to deal mentally. I wish we got more backstory or explanation about Kenta. I feel bad for him.

▪️Way was trying to drink his sorrow at the bar and was used as an emotional punching ball by Babe, when he tried to act on his revenge plan to get to Tony through the only person he knew worked with him. Way denied any involvement in Charlie's accident. I didn't think we would see him that soon after what he did to Babe. I don't know how they will bring him again into the plot. Will he try to redeem himself by helping the X-Hunter fam when they go after Tony?

▪️Finally, we had confirmation that Dean was working against X-Hunter. He was sus since last episode. He may not be entirely responsible for Charlie's death but what he did was really shitty. He has an ego, he is pretty jealous and can't accept that he may not be as good as he thinks he is. Also, he did try to hurt Babe and was giving some stupid excuses for his behaviors. If you wanted to be outside you could just get out and find another team. Why are you trying to sabotage your previous team just because they never gave you what you wanted?! He was whining and it was annoying to hear because we never saw him try to do anything except complaining.

▪️Of course, we all know that Charlie is not really dead. The trailer gave us the clue, so it's not exactly something ground breaking. It was part of his plan, he talked about with Jeff in the last episode. Now, Babe has his power back and will collaborate with Pete to bring down Tony. Charlie will probably just save Babe's life again because he only thinks about protecting his lover.

Anyway, I still like this series and will be ready for episode 11, next Friday. Let's hope it won't have the curse of episode 11 because Babe has already suffered enough.

#my thoughts #thai series #thai bl #bl drama #bl series #pit babe spoilers #random thoughts #Poor Babe is always suffering #We got some Alan x Jeff action but not enough for my taste #Kim is alive and well! Yeah! #Dean can go away because I never liked him too #Way stop drinking and find a good therapist #Can someone save Kenta now? #Charlie maybe you could have said something to Babe to avoid him suffering alone #I love you Jeff but I feel you also could have said something #I'm sure they didn't even think about what it would do to Babe's mental health #Pit Babe the series spoilers #pit babe the series #charlie x babe

[ramblesbiab]

hazbin hotel is so weird to me.

When I was an edgy, newly queer teenager and the pilot came out, it was literally fucking everything to me. I rewatched it on a near daily basis. I thought every joke landed, that the animation was amazing, and I had a weird sense of pride that a YouTuber could produce something as amazing as a 30 minute, high quality animation.

Then a few years passed as I watched Helluva Boss excitedly every time it came out. I thought it was great, for a while. Then over time, I was semi-conscious of a decline in quality, that finally set in around when season 2 came out. I stopped watching at that point because I was so bored of it, I missed what it could've been, what it used to be.

At that point, I started seeing more information about the actual Hazbin Hotel show coming soon. On it's own it would have been strange, the lack of excitement about what was my entire personality at one point. Then I started seeing how a lot of accounts on here who I respect and look up to talk about the show.

The true scope of the issues with the show really set in at that point. How unoriginal and childish the jokes were. How their was barely an audience anywhere for it because it didn't know what it was trying to be. It was clear to me that something I once idolized is a wreck.

Then, one of my closest friends with media opinions I heavily respect starts watching the show and talking about how great it is. It's hard to describe the level of whiplash I felt. It felt like I was missing something, y'know? Like there was an inside joke I didn't understand, how could anyone like the bad show. It's bad.

I... still haven't watched the show. I don't have means to watch it except pirating and I genuinely don't feel like putting in the effort to pirate it. Honestly, the greater point of this post is just like - how bad I am at forming my own opinions, because I feel a constant need to be with the crowd.

I know that's a problem. It shouldn't matter how people I respect feel about the show, because if I enjoy it and it's not genuinely problematic, then there's nothing wrong with that. So maybe I would like the show. Maybe I'm in the small audience which I've repeatedly seen referred to as dumb, overly edgy, etc. And maybe I don't want to admit that because I'm hoping I'm not in the minority.

Anyway, that's the end of this long post. Have a nice day.

#hazbin hotel #helluva boss #i know the internet will just #keep being the way it is #but do we have to make such sweeping generalizations #about the audience of things #especially if it's not something genuinely problematic #like I know the show is trashy #I sometimes enjoy trashy things #but I can't now #because I'd feel too self-conscious #and hell #maybe it's for the best that I've been persuaded not to watch it #it could be the worst thing I'd ever see #and now I know to avoid it #the world is complex #and I'm far too simple for it #that's probably my problem #i'll stop writing tags now

[screambirdscreaming]

At the bus stop one time there was a gaggle of preschoolers waiting to catch the bus for a field trip day, and someone walked past with a couple of friendly little dogs, to great general delight.

But after a little bit, the dogs were getting overwhelmed, and the preschoolers were gently coaxed to back off so the person with the dogs could continue on. Specifically, one of the preschool teachers said, "Sometimes, when you're small, being surrounded by big people can be a bit scary and overwhelming. Even if they are friendly."

This was recieved as great wisdom: after all, the preschoolers were also small, and understood how scary and overwhelming big people could be! And the dogs were indeed even smaller than the preschoolers, so it made sense.

What was funny and charming was that, upon absorbing and reflecting on this wisdom, they all felt the need to tell it to one another. In tones of great insight, they turned to one another and said, "Did you know? Sometimes when you are small, being surrounded by big people can be scary and overwhelming! Even if they are friendly!" Back and forth, without any particular concern that they were all saying the same thing. Have reached comprehension of an insight, it must be shared!

I must say that this behavior is less charming in tumblr users than in preschoolers. Not least because tumblr users, having gained a little analytical skill to misuse, insist on Summarizing and Generalizing and Unifying the insights they repeat, quickly turning any interesting new information into formulaic dogmatic mush.

#i made the mistake of looking in the notes of the beach sand post i reblogged to see if anyone else had interesting comments #And the rate at which it went from like #1) person states with moderate confidence an opinion based on their personal observations #2) multiple people reply with “wow thats so insightful!” (aka it aligns with my preconceived notions of how things work) #3) someone else adds additional personal observations which are not really relevant but which can be absorbed into the narrative #4) people start outright stating the underlying belief on which this bias is constructed as if it were a fresh insight #5) general derisive attitude towards people who haven't seen the Obviously Correct solution to this complex real world problem yet #It's very....... #It's not like it's a high stakes post but it's such a microcosm of the whole dogmatic phenomenon #Also this js a more specific gripe to My Field or w/e #But the degree to which people react to the problems caused by the whole “Control of Nature” era of engineering #with this equally reductive “Nature will Fix Everything” type of attitude #Is sooooo frustrating. #Yes a great many of our current problems could have been avoided if we had not made massive changes to ecosystem processes on the assumptio #That they were simple and we understood them. And that they would respond in predictable ways. #the simplicity in retrospect of “wow we Should Not have done that” does not mean that they are simple to undo! #You can't go back in time. You can't turn back the clock on chaotic processes #Which is. Almost every process ever. #Restoration is hard! Returning to previous regimes of sediment or flooding or fire is tricky and full of foibles! #Moving towards a future which doesn't suck as much even if the past cant be recreated is also uncertain and difficult! #It's frustrating to see people act all high and mighty about how they Respect Nature unlike whoever is making all these decisions #When their understanding of the natural processes in question is AS simplistic as the people who caused the whole mess back in 1910 or w/e #Like I'm not saying there's not bad interests standing in the way of functional restoration on all levels #That's very much a fight to be fought. #But looking at that fight-in-process and saying “wow none of you Respect Nature like me uwu let nature fix it” #Is. #Ugh.

[brittlebutch]

it's actually so fascinating to me that Brennan has created a character that maintains a pretty relaxed and mild-mannered demeanor and has said multiple times that the absolute Core of her is "FEAR" and how often we see this Fear manifest specifically in Avoidance; it really nails a relationship to that mentality where your brain fully Stops recognizing the emotion properly out of like, sheer self-defense from the stress of having to carry it all the time

I think this is also perfectly showcased in the way we tend to see Tula swing so suddenly from 'level and steady' to 'snarling Panic' and then back again - Just because your brain has detached itself from the Conscious Recognition of the emotion doesn't mean it can Actually stop itself from experiencing it. So the Fear is always there and always acting as a stressor, but because of that inability to Identify it there's no way to recognize or address it before that final straw hits and your bodymind jumps Straight into Full Meltdown Mode; but then once again, once you drop even a Little bit below that Peak Terror your brain ceases to process the emotion; it's like the most exhausting form of Poor Object Permanence in the world

And even if Tula is aware of this happening to her, that doesn't really make it any easier to deal with / address. Even if you're able to spot the symptoms Around the emotion -- chest pain, irritation, nausea, whatever -- because the Emotion Itself is basically impossible to find, you can't really Successfully Pin Down what the problem is OR a way to cope with it. If you can't figure out That You Are Anxious, then figuring out What Is Making You Anxious is impossible, which makes Find A Way To Make Peace With That incomprehensible. That's where the Avoidance comes in: you can no longer identify what might be a Dangerous Situation, which means that Anything New has a big potential to be Really Bad in a variety of ways (ranging "I don't Feel Good" to "Fully Lashing Out bc you've entered Fight/Flight and can't get out of it" to "Actual Outside Danger This Time") and that means the Only Way you know how to be Safe is to just Avoid Doing Anything New and Only stick to Familiar Situations, because anything unfamiliar is a monster of a gamble you don't know how to prepare for or cope with

#N posts stuff #one could argue ‘we see tula worry a lot tho’ but that’s bc Worry is an Action that can occur Separately from Recognizing Anxiety #now that I know tumblr will put a hard cap on your tags w/o telling you i'm resigning myself to posting rambling meta in post body #but i'm not happy about it; anyway i love how often life is full of Coincidences bc this is something I've Finally identified in myself #like. This Month. like this is brand new articulation for some of the problems i have in life; again knowing this doesn't help lmao #bc even when you know to look Around the shape of the emotion - like 'oh my face is Snarling rn. i'm probably experiencing Something' #like i said bc you don't know What that something is OR What might have caused it then the only solution you Ever get to come up with #is just 'fully retreat and go calm down somewhere else' which INVARIABLY means that you will wind up in that same situation again #and Still have no idea how to handle it bc you never could figure out what caused it so you don't know how to handle it any better than #'fully retreat and go calm down somewhere else'; so 'be somewhere else' is the ONLY way you can ever think to Help it #which usually invariably turns into 'Just Avoid Fucking Everything just in case'; which doesn't work! bc life doesn't let you do that #so then it's just a cycle of falling into the same pitfalls and feeling miserable all the time; gotta love it :) #if you're like me this also gives you Bad Bad Bad Memory bc your brain will Promptly hide evidence of Scary Situation instinctively #like 3 weeks ago this dude ran a red light and almost t-boned me Full Speed & managed to stop like. maybe 3 feet away. #and i like. Startled Laughed and said 'that was scary' and then within 30 seconds i had Fully Forgotten it happened & only remembered #like 2 days ago. Ha! believe it or not this Does Not Help with 'How can I Address the Problem instead of Avoiding It Entirely?' #dimension 20 #d20: stupendous stoats #tula #d20lb

[twodoorsnotone]

Really enjoyed how the Lookback Diaries went from skirting around and dropping hits about the Kickstarter to just. 'Fuck Bernie Su'

#lizzie bennet diaries #Lookback Diaries #it's crazy all these things that went on behind the scenes #like i just. had no idea it was this messy #i assumed they probably didn't get paid enough etc but the way that BS completely fucked everyone over #AND himself because people totally would have given good money for an LBD movie #it's crazy #i always assumed pemberley just died out because they ran out of money NOT BECAUSE THEY WERE AVOIDING UNIONS #will always have to mourn the fact that we almost could have gotten another series >:(

[longlivetv]

I just keep thinking about how in Hits Different she ends it (not counting the final chorus) with “is it you? or have they come to take me away?” and then she opens Fortnight with “I was supposed to be sent away but they forgot to come and get me”

#we know there were breaks and I think part of her wishes they’d taken the out on one of them a lot sooner #because a lot of the mess could have been avoided if they’d just accepted it wasn’t what it should be anymore #way back when the cracks formed #and instead they just kept spackling over them until the whole thing fell apart

[sepulchritude]

WHY does family stuff have to be so emotionally activating

#i’m getting lunch with my mom tomorrow and i have to tell her i started T and it’s gonna be a whole thing 😫 #and i’ll have to reach out to various other family members so i can tell them before she does #i’m just TIRED #there’s so many ways it could go and the absolute best outcome is ‘it’s just depressing’ #i don’t really want to see my mom cry again but i guess here we go #i have shit to do today but my thoughts keep circling or getting stuck in avoidance mode #sepulchritudinous