#the summers are when the ted thrives | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

leakywright · 4 months

Text

{ JONATHAN DAVISS, 21, CISMALE, HE/HIM } Is that MALIK ‘LEAKY’ WRIGHT? A SENIOR originally from CLEVELAND, MS, they decided to come to Ogden College to study ENVIRONMENTAL STUDIES on a ATHLETIC SCHOLARSHIP. They’re THE TRUSTY SIDEKICK on campus, but even they could get blamed for Greer’s disappearance.

been traveling these wide roads for so long...

NAME: malik ‘leaky’ andre wright NICKNAME: leaky, leaks, wright BIRTHDAY: october 16, 2002 ZODIAC: libra sun, sagittarius moon, virgo rising SEXUALITY: bisexual RELIGION: practicing christian (baptist) THREE POSITIVE TRAITS: generous, adaptable, playful THREE NEGATIVE TRAITS: flaky, scatterbrained, cheap THREE SKILLS: trained mechanic, jazz piano, math ENNEAGRAM: 2w1 MYERS-BRIGGS: istp EXTRACURRICULARS: varsity football team: tight-end. vp of recruitment pike, sports show host for student radio station, undergraduate student council.

AESTHETIC: gold rings, early morning runs, sunsets on the river, front porch sweet-tea, tailgating, kisses from grandma, cheers on top of tables, high fives, cheesy grins for photos, BeReal

CHARACTER INSPO: teddy flood (westworld), peeta mellark (the hunger games), matt seracen (friday night lights), pop tate (riverdale), charlie young (the west wing), sam obisanya (ted lasso), gregory (abbott elementary)

LIKES: making playlist, late night jams, fresh sunday mornings, making people laugh, warm summer sun, the changing of leaves, soft blankets, historical fiction, holidays DISLIKES: the past, winter, unsweetened tea, ripped jeans, cold weather, people talking during movies, doing the dishes

FAVORITE MOVIES/TV: ted lasso, friday night lights, new girl, atlanta, teen wolf, outer banks, nope, knives out, do the right thing, waves, if beale street could talk, abbott elementary FAVORITE BOOKS: the vanishing half, seven days in june, the hunger games, harry potter series, possessing the secret of joy, the fire next time FAVORITE ARTISTS: b.b. king, leon bridges, tank and the bangas, lizzo, zach bryan, lawrence, j. cole, abraham alexander, tierra whack

FAMILY: mother - adelaide wright (naomie harris) father - andre wright (omar sy) younger sister - haven wright (marsai martin) younger brother - amai wright (danny boyd jr)

pinterest here, playlist here

MOMMA’S WORDS REOCCUR TO ME:

growing up in cleveland mississippi meant that leaky had access to the only grammy museum outside of la. but really it meant that leaky grew up with humble beginnings, in a one story house that was full of love, laughter, and inspiration. andre and adelaide wright had been high school sweethearts, with andre giving up his dreams of being a full-time musician when they found out adelaide was pregnant, to then instead be the town mechanic. she was a nurse, he a mechanic during the days and blues musician at night, and though life was hectic. it was good.

leaky was taught all the necessities by his father, piano, bass, basic mechanic skills. he wanted his son to be well-rounded and thrive in the world. to build him up. and, like every southern town, high school football became the heart of the wright household. and early on they discovered that leaky was talented. he was good, he had promise for the future. and that he had.

so between practices, gardening, picking on his younger siblings, jamming with his father, and everything else in between, leaky looked at the future with hope, with optimism. and it seemed promising.

junior year of high school, leaky committed to alabama for football, full-ride, tight-end. play time wasn’t promised for him as a freshman, but nick saban personally mentioned his name for future championships. and to make everything better, his best friend jackson and girlfriend iona were accepted their senior year. they had plans to make tuscaloosa their home.

SURRENDER TO THE GOOD LORD: (tw death)

his freshman year was exciting, and a bit overwhelming. the golden boy of the town lost his way, getting caught up in the culture of college and partying. jackson, iona, and him were having the time of their life. and sure leaky wasn’t playing as much as he wanted, but it was enough for the time being.

and then tragedy struck, beginning of second semester of his freshman year, the three of them had been out one night, leaky felt he was on top of the world. but soon it fell into darkness, he remembered sliding into the backseat of the car, pressing a sloppy kiss to iona’s neck, and the next thing he was waking up in the hospital receiving the worst news of his life. jackson and iona were dead.

and then things continued downhill, ogden had attempted to recruit leaky as well, and reached out with a new offer. full playing time, full ride, and a fresh start. leaky couldn’t turn it down. it might be kissing his chance of the nfl behind, but he couldn’t turn down the stellar education ogden was offering him.

so after finishing his freshman year, leaky moved to portsmouth, summer training and all, began his life at ogden, this time taking a side role in his life. no longer the big fish in a small pond like his life in mississippi, he found his place easily. but he doesn’t talk about his freshman year, he doesn’t visit home, and though he seems to be a vibrant and stellar young man, he holds his cards close to his chest.

AND HE’LL WIPE YOUR SLATE CLEAN:

leaky is enjoying ogden, two years in he’s making friends, a star player, doing what he can. and yet there’s a nagging guilt, of not going home when he knows his family misses him, of not visiting iona and jackson’s families, of moving on. but he can’t face it, not yet. maybe one day he’ll be able to return home.

in fact that was the original plan, after his education, to return to cleveland and continue to build up his beloved city. like his father, leaky let’s his passions stay that way, it’s easier to keep the creativity without the pressure of it all. and instead he chose environmental science, something he hopes to be an asset for his community. leaky grew up gardening with his mother, and shares a deep love for the environment, and figures this is the best way to move forward.

GREER:

the two were casual friends. he’d see her at parties, and at school events. it’s hard not to notice the golden girl, especially with how visual leaky is on campus, always involved with an event or being seen in the advertising for the school. they got along fine, having friendships that crossed-over. he never knew her really well, but he respected her enough and enjoyed her presence. whenever she needed help or had a favor, leaky was more than ready to aid a hand. though it never seemed the two got below a surface-level friendship (to those who witnessed them anyway).

THE TRUSTY SIDEKICK:

you need a wingman? leaky is your guy. he’s charming and pleasant and can talk anyone up. need a favor? leaky is there easily fulfilling it as if it’s nothing to him. the guy is a confidant, a hype-man, a volunteer, he can transform himself into whatever you need and it never seems to bother him. and despite being a gifted football player, and smart guy, and seemingly everywhere on campus, he doesn’t steal the spotlight. he’s not the one you think of when you think of ogden, he lets others take the popularity, the jealous looks, the whispers. despite always being there, you might sometimes overlook him, maybe because he’s always there. but he seems to be a good guy, always offering a kind smile and nod of his head on campus, willing to help tutor you in math, and then lets you have all the glory when you ace the test. it almost seems like leaky is making himself out to be the pedestal that everyone sits on. the support that uplifts the hero, and yet still disappears in the crowd, never seeking glory for himself.

extra:

previous tasks found here

he’s always wearing a jacket because he can’t stand the cold

he wears a gold chain that was given to him by iona, he never takes it off

junior year recap:

found a note/torn out paper seemingly about greer during the haunted house

got drunk for the first time in years at the new year's party - holds guilt for penny ending up dead

found a bloody glove when looking for firewood

g told him to find penny's file in the dean's office

broke in with link and took a picture of it - haven't told anyone else

g put nova and leaky together before the rave and gave nova hints about leaky

surprisingly didn't sustain any injuries during the fire

logan confronted him afterward about the text she received about him

stayed in town for the summer to work at a farm and garden, left a few times to visit sassa

#i once again have no clue what my muses did i should start taking notes #ogdenintro

2 notes · View notes

tirednerd2012 · 2 years

Note

Imagine some kind of AU where Jonathan and Nancy fall for each other while being study pals. Two nerds just falling for each other is good for the soul

Nancy excels in everything, but for some reason she hit a roadblock with something like her history class. But she knows Jonathan is like the top student in that class. She’s seen his papers, getting almost 100% every time. She also knows Jonathan struggles in their chem class. They’ve barely talked, a few greetings when their brothers hang out, but Nancy doesn’t think she’s ever heard him speak.

So she tracks him down at lunch in the library, makes a deal that they help each other and she won’t ever bother him again after the year is over.

They study after school a lot, helping each other and getting closer as friends. Both celebrate getting respective B’s in the class they originally struggled in. Nancy is sad it’ll be over in the summer. She catches herself staring at Jonathan while he writes out some formulas and oh no, she has a crush. Fuck.

Jonathan is also panicking, but became self aware of the crush months ago.

Oh my God yes. Two school nerds falling in love gives me life (this is actually one of the main ways my fiance and I became friends, we were in the same classes in college and studied together). But this isn't anything with the Upside Down going on, just Jonathan and Nancy being able to be normalish teenagers and doing schoolwork. Jonathan still helps out in his house a lot, but tries to be a good example for Will and not stress his mom out by doing well in school on top of everything else. Nancy thrives on academic excellence.

She and Jonathan don't talk often, more so just waves when he picks up Will from their house. He's the one to do it since their mom works late and Jonathan doesn't like the concept of Will biking the distance alone. He doesn't talk much to Nancy, but he's polite to the Wheeler parents and listens when Will goes on about the campaign or whatever the boys did that day. He ruffles Will's hair and he always has his backpack with him.

They're ahead in all their classes, besides history for Nancy and chemistry for Jonathan. So Nancy proposes they help each other out. She asks if he'd be willing to help her in history in return for her help in chemistry, since they both have A's in the respective classes. She thinks he's not really her biggest fan so she promises she'll leave him alone at the end of the semester. He agrees and comes with Will after school rather than just going to the library for a bit while he waits on his brother.

And the two grow close fast. Jonathan develops feelings first, but he keeps them a secret. Meanwhile Nancy starts falling harder for him as she watches how he acts around her family. He helps her with history, explaining what was going on in great detail and with a glimmer in his eyes. Then Holly asks him to play one day and he agrees. Nancy knew he had to be good with kids because of how good he was with Will, but he ends up in a tiara and lets Holly put hair pieces in his hair with no complaint. He helps Mrs. Wheeler bring out dinner and he's even able to hold a conversation with Ted without looking annoyed. Sometimes they end up needing to study later than they planned and Will falls asleep on the couch waiting for them, so she's seen on more than one occasion Jonathan carefully lifting Will in his arms and holding him like he's the most precious thing in the world while he gets Will to the car and buckles him in.

Jonathan is quiet at school, but she's found him eating his lunch in the library and joins him every day. They study then, too, but also just talk about life. Turns out Jonathan wants to be a photographer and she wants to be a journalist. When she makes a comment about hwo they'd be a great team, he blushes and she remembers her promise, that she'd leave him alone at the end of the semester so she shakes her head and goes back to working.

She's straight up stared at his lips as he works on an equation and when he catches her stare, he turns red. By the end of the semester, they're celebrating their B's in the classes they struggle in and Nancy is disappointed they're not going to be hanging out anymore. Jonathan is the one to say that he doesn't want to stop seeing her and wants to still be around her.

There's silence for a moment before Nancy kisses him and he returns it, pulling her into him and they hold each other, their papers long forgotten on the ground as they separate, but stay close. And Jonathan reminds her that they do make a good team.

#stranger things #jonathan byers #nancy wheeler

31 notes · View notes

hellsmouthcove · 1 year

Text

from cursive’s the ugly organ 2014 reissue lyric booklet

We should've seen The Ugly Organ coming.

When Tim Kasher reunited Cursive in 1999 and produced Domestica a year later, it was a warning sign. Cursive hadn’t exactly whispered on Such Blinding Stars for Starving Eyes and The Storms of Early Summer: Semantics of Song, but Domestica was the kind of album that hurt, that could bruise your faith in relationships. As cathartic as it felt, it portended more storms on the horizon.

When the Burst and Bloom EP arrived in 2001, the winds kicked up. Guitarist Ted Stevens said as much on “Tall Tales, Telltales”: “Four winds converge upon a point where your compass / spirals ‘round in useless motions mocking everything.” The maelstrom: It’s where Cursive thrives. The EP shuddered with the band’s accelerating momentum, from the self-referential “Sink to the Beat” to the almost palpable weariness from meaningless hook-ups in “Fairytales Tell Tales.” Hearing Burst and Bloom, there was no doubt that something big lurked on the horizon for Cursive.

Yet The Ugly Organ still surprised us: that the band could be this ferocious, this ambitious, this unsettling. Kasher had turned his lyrics on himself before – see Domestica – but never with such dismissive disdain. “Cut it out – your self-inflicted pain is getting too routine,” he howls in “Art is Hard.” During the regretful morning-after of “The Recluse,” he sings, “Oh Christ, I’m not that desperate, am I? / Oh no, oh God, I am.” He sings from the perspective of his embittered significant other in “Butcher the Song,” “So rub it in in your dumb lyrics / Yeah, that’s the time and place to wring out your bullshit.” She returns, even angrier, in “Bloody Murderer,” saying, “When I was yours, you fled the scene / Now you can’t wash your hands of me.” When The Ugly Organ closes with “Staying Alive” and its lilting refrain, “The worst is over,” that’s not necessarily hope we hear. It could just as easily be resignation. The worst is over, but this isn’t much better.

As on Domestica, Kasher signs about a character on The Ugly Organ, but just as on Domestica, it never feels far removed from him. “Butcher the Song” even uses his name, while “Art is Hard” name-checks Cursive. Kasher fell under the sway of the concept-album idea on Domestica, using his own life to heavily inform the album’s story of a failing relationship. It’s easy to see the same on The Ugly Organ and its bracingly unsentimental portrait of a touring musician (named “the Ugly Organist”) and the dysfunction that penetrates all aspects of his life. He’s going through the motions artistically (“Some Red Handed Sleight of Hand,” “Art is Hard”), his relationship with his significant other is a destructive cycle of infidelity and bitter recrimination (“The Recluse,” “Butcher the Song,” “A Gentleman Caller,” “Bloody Murderer”), and redemption seems unlikely (“Sierra,” “Staying Alive”). The flights of fancy of “Driftwood: a Fairy Tale” and “Harold Weathervein” recall the stormy, water-logged imagery of Burst and Bloom. “Weatherman, do you feel?” Stevens asks on the latter. “Is it stormy inside of your veins?”

The Ugly Organ made landfall on March 4, 2003, the same day as Evanescence's Fallen and roughly two weeks before the start of the Iraq War. The darkest days of the Bush Era were settling like a dense fog over the entire country, and the outlook was bleak. That made The Ugly Organ especially potent, its gloomy inward focus a natural reflection of the era. The press accolades came quickly, from the mainstream (Rolling Stone called it “a brilliant leap forward,” and Entertainment Weekly said it “raised the Saddle Creek bar”) to the niche (The A.V. Club called it “a potent piece of rock art.” Alternative Press gave it a perfect score).

Plenty of those reviews referenced emo, which had splintered off from punk in the ‘80s but devolved into the flimsiest of marketing gimmicks by the new millennium. By 2003, the third wave of emo was crashing with a deluge of bands all too eager to ride their angsty pop to stardom. This was the year Alex Trebek referenced Cursive’s Saddle Creek labelmates Bright Eyes in a question whose correct response was “What is emo?” Cursive had started in the mid-’90s during emo’s second wave, and the band had little in common with the genre’s millennial torch-bearers, but reviewers had lumped them all together the same. “Cursive might just expand emo’s demographic to include the angsty 22-to-32 grad-student demographic,” went one typically positive-but-condescending review.

Not that The Ugly Organ lacked emo signifiers. Its confessional tone, jaundiced take on relationships, and self-loathing outed it, but the album’s ambition trumped any tidy labels. Calling it “daring,” The A.V. Club’s Noel Murray wrote in his “best music of 2003” list that “The Ugly Organ carries navel-gazing to compellingly bloody, winsomely sad, and even admirably pretentious extremes.”

By the end of 2003, Linkin Park, Avril Lavigne, Evanescence, and Toby Keith had some of the top-selling albums of the year, with OutKast, the White Stripes, and Fountains of Wayne topping that year’s Village Voice Pazz & Jop Critics’ Poll. If anything, the emo breakthrough of that year was Death Cab for Cutie’s Transatlanticism (#34 on Pazz & Jop), the band’s final release before ascending to major-label stardom.

But anyone with even a passing familiarity of music history knows that the charts and polls hardly tell the whole story. With The Ugly Organ, Cursive had made a landmark for itself and Saddle Creek. It was the label’s 51st release and the second in what my colleague Marc Hawthorne called “Saddle Creek’s holy trinity” in his liner notes for The Faint’s Danse Macabre reissue: Danse Macabre, The Ugly Organ, and Bright Eyes’ I’m Wide Awake, It’s Morning. (I’d argue more for LIFTED or the Story is in the Soil, Keep Your Ear to the Ground on that count, but I’ll save that for the next time I see Marc.)

Just prior to The Ugly Organ, Saddle Creek had released the celebratory compilation Saddle Creek 50, which included Cursive’s gleefully self-referential “Nonsense” (“I really don’t want to write another ‘I’m a dick’ song again”), which is included on this reissue. The label’s 49th release had been another Cursive joint, the “Art is Hard” single, which featured the explosive six-minute B-side “Sinner’s Serenade,” also included here. Rounding it out are four songs from Cursive’s split EP with Eastern Youth, 8 Songs to Eat You – check out the ferocious playing by cellist Gretta Cohn on “Excerpts from Various Notes Strewn Around the Bedroom of April Connolly, Feb 24, 1977” – and two songs from the single for “The Recluse.” It’s an exhaustive – and exhausting – snapshot of a band realizing its power and wielding it for maximum impact.

And then Cursive was gone. Again. Taking another one of its intermittent hiatuses. An unease has accompanied every album after The Ugly Organ that it could be the last one – no, for real this time. Maybe because The Ugly Organ capped an unprecedented productive streak, ending a three-record, three-year run with an album that can’t help but reflect the effort that went into it. The exhaustion, the ambivalence, the doubt, it all bleeds out of those 12 tracks. At the end of “Staying Alive,” the “ghost chorus” referenced in the liner notes sings, “The worst is over, Doo do Doo do Doo do Doo doo.” On second thought, maybe it's neither hope nor resignation, but simple relief. The storm has passed. And it was a motherfucker.

Kyle Ryan

The A.V. Club

#i am posting #music.png #cursive #cursives domestica #the ugly organ #saddle creek #bright eyes #the faint #2003

10 notes · View notes

howtoliveinparis · 1 year

Text

Why Do Men Hate Women?

This has nothing to do with Paris, but I wanted to recommend it because I think it is an important read, and I feel like everyone should read it. As a female writer, I tell my stories from a female point of view. No offense to my male readers. I haven’t checked my Google Analytics in years so I could be wrong about my audience. This is not meant to be exclusionary.

While I think women need to read the book, I believe men need to do better, and I hope men read this book as well. How do you combat #NotAllMen? You become that man that says maybe rape isn't good, maybe domestic violence is actually bad, maybe women should have equal rights, and hold your friends accountable instead of being complicit in their misogyny.

Actually first let’s back track and start with how I discovered the book. I had been talking to an English guy named Jake. I honestly don’t know how long, maybe a few weeks. It was summer, I was traveling, and I wasn’t really interested in getting to know someone. I had just broken it off with someone and I was indifferent to dating and men. But he was good looking, 6’5 (inceptioned), and his Hinge profile gave no indications he was off. Yes, we learned nothing from Ted Bundy. In addition his prompts were thoughtful, in comparison to French men who can’t be bothered. There was nothing outwardly saying "I'm a misogynist".

Because of my previous relationship I learned about “red flags” to look out for. I’ve actually adopted an annoying habit of spotting them and cutting and running. It leaves a lot of the men I date perplexed, and unfortunately it is a lot (‘you have to kiss talk to a lot of frogs'). But I don’t just ghost, which is immature and lacking in empathy, I try to let them know why I’m ending it.

This really is how we should act towards men. Women need to get out of the (outdated) idea that they need to help men become better. It's not your job.

I know I cannot exactly lecture women on how to be. Everyone has their reasons for being unwilling to let go of someone. I’m not over my ex. Sadly I still miss him, and I still love him. This is also why I don’t really care and can walk away from anyone easily. I will not tolerate less than what I think I deserve.

But women being happy alone really is the end for straight men. More and more women are learning they are okay alone. If I have to read one more think piece on the sadness of “lonely men” I will scream. It’s like writers are gaslighting women into staying with men who cannot accept accountability or make changes to their shitty characters.

Statistically unmarried women thrive more than their married counterparts. Men are happy in relationships, women are not (according to research). 70% of divorces are initiated by women. Women are tiredt.

Back to Jake Hughes. Our first conversation went well. We talked for a good 6 hours (maybe 7, however long my flight was). It was like a game of tennis, a message a minute, and to me that's the hallmark of something to pursue. Who doesn't love banter?

But after our initial meeting, I became increasingly perturbed. It was little things at first. He would say things, and instead of the usual allowing them to slide, I put my foot down and called him out. 27 is too old to be that callow. But he would always turn it around on me. It didn’t even make any sense, how he always made the argument about me, but I knew this was a form of manipulation so I told him I wasn’t interested in him, and left it at that.

He became incensed. He called me a misandrist (a term only MRAs would know) and claimed I wasn’t giving him a chance, and I never did. He tried to gaslight me. At first I was like ‘maybe I hadn’t given him a chance’ and I tried once more, but he was just not a good person. The manipulation tactics and the things he would say were 🚩🚩🚩.

After I let him know there was no future, he would continue texting me, even if I didn’t answer. When I asked him to stop, he said he was just giving me what I wanted (because I like a clingy, needy texter, but the thing is I need to like the person in order to like it).

I very maturely wrote him a nice text, which he laughed at saying people don’t text like that (as if manipulation wasn’t enough, periods and grammar are for losers). I believe I very nicely, and clearly, explained my reasoning for ceasing to speak to him. As it had only been a few weeks, I didn’t understand the aggression. You would never guess a guy like that would be a raging misogynist psycho. Again we have learned nothing from Ted Bundy.

While Googling something pertaining to him I found “Men Who Hate Women” by English author Laura Bates. The book is a little skewed as Bates is English, and talks with an English point of view about a threat facing all Western men, but most importantly in England. However it was apropos because “Jake” was English and lived in England. I don’t know if Jake was an Incel (he wasn’t a virgin) but he did say he didn’t like English girls because they all looked like sluts so… maybe just a run of the mill misogynist. At the very least something from the manosphere.

I went into the book thinking Incels, PUAs, MRAs, etc. were sad sack virgin losers who couldn’t get laid, but Bates says most men of the manosphere are white, educated, middle class western men. I’m not sure why this surprised me as the reason I now suffer the effects of emotional abuse and PTSD/trauma were at the hands of an Oxford educated, 6’4 white male Grammar school boy. One expects a certain level of intelligence from that set, and one would be wrong.

Christian was (maybe still is) an avid YouTube, Insta, and Reddit user, and YouTube, Insta, and Reddit are perfect gateways to Manosphere ideologies and Incel forums. His hatred of women, and his belief in male superiority and dominance, stems from his mother so it’s easy enough to explain his viewpoint away. Hatred of your mother is pretty standard fare for an evolving hatred of women.

He was like Paul Bethany (another misogynist) in A Very British Scandal. The misogyny starts small (like when he proudly proclaimed all women are dumb bitches), but grows bigger ("you need to be fucked so you'll stop being a bitch"). There are little things like “if my wife gave me a daughter I’d leave” (his general need for dominance by even controlling the sex of his future offspring) because he considered women weak and inferior. These ideas weave a thread to eventual misogyny and male dominance, which leads to control, which will spiral to bigger issues.

But we love them right? So these opinions he espouses are brushed off as “he doesn’t really mean it, it’s a joke, that's just his humor”. He doesn’t really think like that because he loves me. I love him and I know he’s not really like that. I see the side others don’t. My love is enough. With me he can express his vulnerability and be open. Blah, blah, blah. All things we tell ourselves that make it okay.

Believe me I tried to be a safe space for Christian. I trusted him implicitly. I felt secure with him, I told him things I've never told other people, I wanted to be that for him too.

The truth is I was never his equal. How could I be? I was just a 'dumb bitch'. A woman.

We should not let anything go unchecked, especially if it’s in regards to negative views of our own sex (women). Ever. If a guy says anything to you, always, always, always, call it out. If he can’t take accountability and learn, and in turn change, leave him. We have to be the change we want to see.

Bates details how the indoctrination into misogyny starts. It’s not always so simple as the guy is ugly, or short (heightcels), or bald (baldcels), or any of the reasons men usually hate themselves, because at the end of the day it really is hatred for themselves. There’s even a group for men with small wrists and a ginger incel group (a totally British phenomenon). The ginger one is called gingercels. Yes, it seems absolutely bonkers, but then again so is hating someone for their hair color. The hate manifests to a point that it turns into something deeply unsettling. This can only lead to not just dire consequences for women, but to society as a whole.

Bates went on to list one mass killing event, and then another, and then another, showing how these are (intentionally hidden) portrayed in the media. One paragraph after another paragraph and I was like “oh my god when will it stop?”. Some of them I had never even heard of (the ones in Canada and the UK), and I had no idea they were misogynistic acts of violence because the media never said so. How naïve we all are. This Manosphere movement is so pervasive, it exists everywhere and we don't even realize it.

I am not a violent person, I can’t think of any situation where I could hurt someone. They say everyone is capable of it, but it’s not within me. So reading all of these men killing random strangers (even other men), wives, children, even random women working out in gyms, all under the guise that “women are evil and will not give them their god given right to sex”, so they can hurt anyone they like. This insanity exists and it’s only going to get worse as more women choose to be single (which they already are).

By far the one that left me with a pit in my stomach, and really they all did, but the chapter titled Men Who Don’t Know That They Hate Women was truly eye opening. It makes you wonder if any men in this world truly see us as human beings. And if biologically they are missing the part of the brain that can accept accountability for anything. What is wrong with men? Why do they hate us so much?

I wholeheartedly encourage everyone to read this book. Don’t let the title fool you. It’s not an indoctrination into misandry (thanks to Jake for teaching me that term). It’s not trying to get you to become a man hater. It tries to answer the question above. It exists to open your eyes to the world we inhabit.

If anything it could stop you from meeting some of these truly vile and disgusting men, or if you’re a mother, help you understand these pervasive and sinister groups trying to reek havoc on the minds of your boys, getting them to succumb to groupthink by way of Instagram meme accounts and YouTube rabbit holes. Please stop it before it starts. This in turn saves women by stopping men from killing us, and raping us, and hating us for simply existing.

After reading it I felt disgusted, horrified, and exhausted. I had to take breaks while reading. This is not just a fringe group on the internet. This book showed these are fast growing groups of men that walk amongst us. It’s your mailman, the security guy in your building, the dude behind you at the grocery store. They are everywhere. This is a group that thinks rape should be legal because they are “entitled” to women’s bodies. If that’s not an attack on womenkind I don’t know what is. If that doesn’t scare you I don’t know what will.

If you can’t buy a copy, please check your local library: https://g.co/kgs/Ud3ouC

And a word from Ben Hurst who is doing his part with the Good Lad Initiative (mentioned in the book, now called Beyond Equality):

Ben Hurst • TEDxLondonWomen • "Boys won’t be boys. Boys will be what we teach them to be":

https://www.ted.com/talks/ben_hurst_boys_won_t_be_boys_boys_will_be_what_we_teach_them_to_be?utm_campaign=tedspread&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=tedcomshare

0 notes

fearsmagazine · 1 year

Text

IDW Debuts the Haunting Cover Artwork to May’s Dark Spaces: Good Deeds #1

Since its initial announcement at San Diego Comic-Con last summer, Dark Spaces: Good Deeds—the second comic book miniseries in New York Times best-selling author Scott Snyder’s curated line of IDW original projects—has been shrouded in secrecy. This eerie historical thriller of obsession, power, and redemption carefully kept from the public, waiting for just the right time to surface…and that time is now!

In anticipation of the series launch in May, IDW unveiled the ethereal cover artwork for the first issue of Dark Spaces: Good Deeds, giving the first tantalizing taste of the six-issue miniseries written by Che Grayson (Batman: Urban Legends), with art by Kelsey Ramsay (Joan Jett and the Black Hearts, I Love Rock-n-Roll), and colors by Ronda Pattison (Dark Spaces: Wildfire). “The most rewarding part of overseeing Dark Spaces is watching the ascendant talent of newcomers evolve from ideas into incredible new comic books,” says Snyder. “Che and Kelsey have crafted a pitch-perfect, soul-searing mystery in Good Deeds. It’s the perfect story to expand the Dark Spaces line to visionary new creators…and it’s only the first of more to come.”

The unifying theme of Scott Snyder’s Dark Spaces line is the exploration of decisions made—and irreversible actions taken—by desperate people in desperate situations. Each character-driven entry in the Dark Spaces anthology series is a fully contained, standalone story written or curated by Snyder, championing the new generation of comic creators.

As testament to Dark Spaces’ commitment to up-and-coming talent, Good Deeds #1 features evocative covers from a gifted handpicked team, including series artist Ramsay, Elizabeth Beals (Star Trek: The Next Generation—Terra Incognita), Hayden Sherman (Dark Spaces: Wildfire), and Martin Morazzo (Ice Cream Man) with colors by Chris O’Halloran. In Good Deeds, teenager Cheyenne Rite and her mother, Rebecca, move to St. Augustine, Florida, in search of a fresh start. They cross paths with Jean McKnight, a disgraced big-city journalist determined to rebuild her career, starting with a fluff piece on the town’s upcoming 450th anniversary celebration. When the quaint community’s festivities give way to bloodshed, Jean begins an investigation, and the women find themselves at the heart of a supernatural conspiracy linked to St. Augustine’s sinister colonial past.

“I’m incredibly excited to get this into the hands of horror fans who are searching for a story that will be scary and thought-provoking in equal measure,” says Grayson. “I’ve always been drawn to stories where flawed characters find themselves thrust in the middle of a mystery. But the only way they can uncover the truth of that mystery is if they face their own dark secrets. I hope that readers find Jean’s journey really satisfying as she searches for meaning in the world and in her own life.”

“It’s been such an effortless collaboration with this absolute powerhouse of a team,” says Ramsay. “I am beyond excited for when Good Deeds reaches readers, and I can only hope our story spooks readers into loving it!” “Scott and I are thrilled to see Che and Kelsey thriving in the Dark Spaces spotlight. They ran with the challenge of following Wildfire, and their work in Good Deeds exemplifies the vision for this line. It’s a razor-sharp and unsettling story told fearlessly by creators on the verge of becoming the industry’s next household names. The mystery of Cheyenne and Jean’s unusual partnership haunts every page, and we can’t wait to share it with readers,” says senior editor Maggie Howell.

For information on how to acquire Dark Spaces comic books from IDW, please contact your local comic shop or visit www.comicshoplocator.com to find a store near you.

About the Creators Che Grayson is a Brooklyn-based filmmaker, writer, and TED speaker whose work is heavily inspired by their love of folklore and horror. Che has written comics for Image, IDW, and DC. A graduate of New York University’s MFA film program, they wrote and directed the award-winning film Magic Hour, which premiered at the 2021 Tribeca Film Festival. Che has worked as a writer for Netflix, Nickelodeon, and Skydance Animation and is currently in development for a new animated TV series.

Kelsey Ramsay is a comic artist and illustrator from London, UK. Her work is featured in Joan Jett and the Black Hearts 40x40: Bad Reputation/I Love Rock ’n’ Roll (Z2 Comics) and Fab Breakout Book: Mad World (StoryWorld Media).

#publishing news #comic book #idw #dark spaces #Good Deeds 1 #scott snyder #che grayson #kelsey ramsay #obsession #horror

1 note · View note

jrueships · 2 years

Note

“Pg stabs kawhi kills him dead lol” HELP? I need this wip to get finished sadly.

Pg ^^^^

BUT YEAH the picture of dorian gray fic au is certainly. One of my wips 😭😭😭 it was the kinda wip where i went wild with the idea and style and typed it all up thinkin 'yea this go hard yea yea post it' then had to stop for life purposes, forgot about it, went back to it, and realized wtf wrong with me 😭 i think it was just the overall fanciness of the words used or smthin idk smthin abt the way i wrote it pissed me off so i might rewrite it better or smthin out of spite LMAO 😭 there might be a chance!!!!!!! I say this knowing i just killed all chances possible

HERES THwait wtf??? My thing still says brad beal subpregnancy wtf????? I keep trying to change that????? Man what the hell? Tumblr got me strugglin whatever i guess this is a telltale sign to the ppl what content they're in for tho (gay posts about poor delusional skrunklies)

ANYWAYS here's some INFO abt it !!! I hope this helped satiate some of your desires to see kawhi get his ass beat for being downbad for a man with the personality equivalent of a cardboard boyband member 😭😭

#i think i am trapped in the eternal hellhole where i think of batshit aus and write them in a flash #then actually reread my writing to make sure the au lines up #and realize how batshit insane the idea is and how no one will read it and the style stinks and i cant be normal #so i just let it rot after writing so much 😭#im sorry for being insane in the membrane i didnt have a favorite chipmunk i liked the evil bald villain ian 😭😭#SO YEA thats like my bad EXPLANATION for why i just. never show my au fics #BUT I LIKE THE AU SO I LIKE TALKING ABOUT IT BUT THE IDEA OF BRINGING IT TO LIFE IS BETTER THAN REALIZING IT'S GONNA BE IN LIFE 😭#AND IT'S NOT LIKE PEOPLE DONT SUPPORT THEM? CUS THEY DO??? i make them with my Powers but #they DO #so i hype ppl up for smthin i end up keeping locked up in my dungeon cave never to be seen #i should rlly just post smthin without thinking of the consequences 😭#i rlly do appreciate all the positive feedbacks to my ideas!!!! im so sorry i cant get myself to polish the content to RLLY create it rn 😭#IN THE SUMMER... WHO KNOWS... MAYBE BOREDOM WILL MAKE ME CARELESS?#anyways i just wanted to explain the already explained basically 😭#the summers are when the ted thrives #prommy <3333 #ted asks #pg/kawhi #answering asks from five hundred years ago? blasphemous bee behavior!!!

3 notes · View notes

damonalbarn · 3 years

Note

Hey I was wondering if you knew the article that Justine spoke about suzi in?!

It was in The Guardian in 2000. Here you go:

Sweet revenge

In the mid 90s, Justine Frischmann and Damon Albarn were the First Couple of Britpop. Then he used a Blur album to rake over their break-up, while she languished in obscurity amid rumours of heroin addiction. Now she's back with a new album, and it's her turn to exorcise her demons.

Caroline Sullivan

Friday March 24, 2000

As Alison Moyet once said, it's hard to write a decent song when you're happy. Rock bands thrive on romantic turmoil in their private lives, without which they would be reduced to padding out lyrics with football scores and the weather.

Thus it was for Blur's Damon Albarn in mid-1998 when he sat down to write what would become the 13 album. His eight-year relationship with Justine Frischmann of the chart-topping Elastica, whom he once described as **"the only person who's ever been completely necessary to me" **had just ended, at her instigation. Pained and humiliated, he decided to exact revenge by exposing their most intimate details to public scrutiny.

The outcome? Embarrassment for Frischmann, a number one album for Blur and a bit of a result for Albarn.

Break-up albums are by definition both embittered and yearning - in the case of Marvin Gaye's vindictive Here, My Dear, they're just plain nasty - but 13 got more up-close and personal than could be considered gentlemanly. Albarn portrayed his former partner as neurotic, even slipping apparent drug references into the single Tender: "Tender is the ghost, the ghost I love the most/Hiding from the sun, waiting for the night to come". Frischmann was the ghost, supposedly, who was on the verge of being consumed by what one music paper euphemistically called "the darkness at the heart of Elastica".

Frischmann's response can be found on a song called The Way I Like It, which appears on Elastica's first album in five years, The Menace (out next month): "Well, I'm living all right and I'm doing okay/Had a lover who was made of sand, and the wind blew him away".

This is unlikely to be her last word on the subject. As she ambivalently begins her first round of interviews since 1996, she's finding that everyone has the same three questions. Why did Elastica nearly sabotage a promising career by taking so long to follow up their million-selling debut? Had Frischmann taken leave of her senses when she walked out on Mr Britpop? And what about the drug rumours?

"One journalist said to me, 'Dahling, I heard you were on heroin - Mahvelous!' " she says with some amusement. "Drugs are around, but I'm not that interested and never have been, although there have been elements of party animal in my band. The rumours are a lot to do with rock'n'roll mythology, where people want to believe you're having a more exciting time than you are."

The only drugs on her person today, as she perches on the edge of an armchair in her publicist's north London living room, are Marlboro Lights. Her other indulgences are two cups of herbal tea and a Cadbury's Flake cupcake, which she nibbles with well-bred pleasure. Her dark eyes are clear, and her long, tanned body is a testament to the virtues of a daily swim in a pool near her Notting Hill home. Only Elastica know whether they really succumbed to heroin and hedonism after their self-titled debut made them more famous than they'd ever expected to be, but if they did, Frischmann, 30, seems little the worse for it.

Given the current predominance of damnable boy bands, the Britpop mid-90s are beginning to seem like a halcyon period for English music. It was a time when the underground went overground, and a self-described "little punk band" like Elastica could sell 80,000 albums in a week.

More than a few loser guitar groups saw Britpop as a licence to print money, but Elastica, led with cool elan by the androgynous Frischmann, were one of its gems. The Blur connection was a marketing godsend (Frischmann and Albarn met on the London indie circuit, she as guitarist in an early line-up of Suede and girlfriend of frontman Brett Anderson, he as a cherubic baggy hopeful), yet the spiky-haired Elastica LP embodied that euphoric time like nothing else.

Frischmann, guitarist Donna Matthews, drummer Justin Welch and bassist Annie Holland were unprepared for the album soaring to number one in its first week. When they signed their record deal, Frischmann, whose great-grandfather was a conductor of the Tsar's orchestra at the Summer Palace in Byelorussia, was five years into an architecture degree at London University. A liberal north London Jewish upbringing - her engineer father built the Oxford Street landmark Centrepoint - had instilled expectations of success, but the reality of being photographed in the supermarket and having her rubbish stolen was a shock. Fiercely independent, she also resented her unsought role as half of Britpop's First Couple.

There was more. Two of Frischmann's musical heroes, The Stranglers and Wire, decided that two Elastica songs were suspiciously similar to two of their own tracks, and won royalties. Meanwhile, there were malicious rumours that Albarn had done much of the work on the record. He hadn't, but he did find Justine's success in America, where she was substantially out-selling Blur, hard to endure.

"It was very hard for him to deal with and he's very confrontational," she says, with the flattering openness of someone who prefers interviews to be more like conversations. She admits she often says too much, but in an era of image control and spin, her honesty makes her a one-off. Not that she's likely to land herself in it too badly - she possesses the intellectual ammunition to look after herself, which must have been instrumental in attracting two of rock's more articulate stars, Albarn and Anderson.

She's been accused of being a professional rock girlfriend, though it was probably they who were lucky to get her. She spent the cab ride over reading the Sylvia Plath letters in Monday's Guardian, and muses on the irony of the poet's subjugating herself to Ted Hughes when she was the more gifted. (Her new boyfriend, by the way, is an unknown photographer, "though that'll probably change, because men seem to get famous when I go out with them".)

"I reacted the way a lot of women do, by being passive," she continues. "He put a lot of pressure on me to give up Elastica. He said, 'You don't want to be in a band, you want to settle down and have kids.' " In so many words? "In so many words. He kept putting on pressure till I started to believe him." She adds bemusedly: "I've met his new girlfriend, and one of the first things she said was that he wanted her to give up travelling with her work to stay home with the baby [Missy, born last autumn]. I'm surprised he's got away with being thought of as a nice person for so long."

After 18 months, during which they did seven American and three Japanese tours, Elastica came off the road to record company demands for an immediate second album. Annie Holland's response was to quit the group, while Donna Matthews became renowned for hard partying on the nocturnal west London scene. They lethargically recorded some demos, but their heart wasn't in it. By 1997, when a second album should have been ready to go, Frischmann and Matthews were barely speaking, and there was nothing useable down on tape.

Holland's replacement, Sheila Chipperfield (of the circus Chipperfields), was deemed not good enough and left by mutual consent. By 1998, their continued lack of productivity was being likened to the Stone Roses' lengthy and ultimately self-destructive holiday between their first and second LPs.

"I didn't think Elastica were going to continue at that point, and we did kinda split up," she says, absently stroking her publicist's cat. Frischmann is a cat person; she's owned a tabby called Benjamin since she was 10. "Unconditional love," she coos. The pet's place in her life is so assured that prospective boyfriends are subjected to his feline scrutiny before she'll go out with them.

On top of everything else, in early 1998 her relationship with Albarn was in trouble. Frischmann retains enough of the indie ethic to detest the phenomenon of celebrity couples, and was dismayed when they became one. "I really hated the tabloid interest, and I went out of my way not to be photographed with him. Only about three pictures of us together exist, I think. In many ways, I think the media interest broke us up, because it made me feel the relationship was quite ugly, and I had to get away from it. There were other factors, too, obviously, because we were together for eight years, and I finally felt it was better the devil you didn't know, really."

Albarn's ego seems to have been severely undermined by having a girlfriend who was nearly as successful as he was, and something of a sex symbol to boot. Despite adopting a resolutely boyish T-shirt-and-jeans uniform, she's thoroughly feminine, a mix that got her voted fifth most fanciable woman in a lesbian magazine.

"I'm completely heterosexual, so I didn't know how to take that. It scares the shit out of me, the idea of being with a girl. I'm glad I've narrowed it down to half the people in the world."

She seems to view Albarn with indulgent exasperation these days, simultaneously praising his intelligence ("The Gallaghers just couldn't compete") and ticking off his flaws. "Damon adores being in the press, and sees all press as good press. He orchestrated that rivalry thing with Oasis. He really wanted kids, and I didn't feel our relationship was stable enough. He was a naughty boy, and he wasn't the right person to have kids with. I had this cathartic moment..."

At which point they split up. Albarn wrote 13 and then met Suzi Winstanley, an artist. "She was pregnant within three months," Justine observes wickedly.

Of the acclaimed 13, she's tactful, describing several songs as "really lovely". She studies her cigarette for a while before adding, "but I'm cynical about selling a record on the back of our relationship". But you're doing the same now. "It's true, but at the time I had no right of reply."

Elastica finally pulled themselves together last year, just as the music industry was about to write them off (their American label had already "very kindly let us go", as she puts it). Holland rejoined, Matthews went to Wales to sort out her life and the band banged out an EP and played the Reading Festival. Things came together quickly after that. They spent the last £10,000 of the recording budget on re-recording a dozen tracks, finishing the album, after years of procrastinating, in six weeks. They've called it The Menace "because that's what it was like to make".

It's dark and resolutely uncommercial - all wrong for 2000's pop-oriented climate. It's unlikely to match the success of the first one, which is fine with them. Call it (though Justine doesn't) their White Album. Its 70s punk aesthetic brings to mind angry girls such as the Slits and the Au Pairs, although the defining mood isn't anger so much as catharsis. None of the songs is specifically about Albarn, she claims. "The dark feeling is due to the sense of isolation, tasting success and getting frightened by it. I was questioning whether I wanted to be in a band any more, and there was no one I could ask for advice. Getting success and everything you ever dreamed about is hard to handle, and makes you question everything."

She's better prepared for success, if it comes again, this time. Already the privacy-preserving barriers are in place. The next interview of the day is with Time Out magazine, which wants a list of her favourite restaurants. "I'm not telling them where I eat," she says reflexively. "I'm gonna lie."

#questions #damon albarn #justine frischmann #blur #elastica

182 notes · View notes

leakywright · 1 year

Photo

{ JONATHAN DAVISS, 21, CISMALE, HE/HIM } Is that MALIK ‘LEAKY’ WRIGHT? A JUNIOR originally from CLEVELAND, MS, they decided to come to Ogden College to study ENVIRONMENTAL STUDIES on a ATHLETIC SCHOLARSHIP. They’re THE TRUSTY SIDEKICK on campus, but even they could get blamed for Greer’s disappearance.

been traveling these wide roads for so long...

AESTHETIC: gold rings, early morning runs, sunsets on the river, front porch sweet-tea, tailgating, kisses from grandma, cheers on top of tables, high fives, cheesy grins for photos, BeReal

CHARACTER INSPO: teddy flood (westworld), peeta mellark (the hunger games), matt seracen (friday night lights), pop tate (riverdale), charlie young (the west wing), sam obisanya (ted lasso)

FAMILY: mother - adelaide wright (naomie harris) father - andre wright (omar sy) younger sister - haven wright (marsai martin) younger brother - amai wright (danny boyd jr)

pinterest here, playlist here

MOMMA’S WORDS REOCCUR TO ME:

SURRENDER TO THE GOOD LORD: (tw death)

AND HE’LL WIPE YOUR SLATE CLEAN:

GREER:

THE TRUSTY SIDEKICK:

extra:

previous tasks found here

he’s always wearing a jacket because he can’t stand the cold

he wears a gold chain that was given to him by iona, he never takes it off

#ogdenintro #just a few touch-ups !!!#my lil bby

2 notes · View notes

fandomwriterstuff · 3 years

Text

Quarantine Queen

Darcy was, for all intents and purposes, an extrovert. She thrived on being around people, engaging with them, all that jazz. So when Dr. Doom’s minions released a pathogen that led to the entirety of Manhattan being quarantined and sick with an extra-strength virus, she started going stir crazy.

She lived in an apartment building not too far from the Avengers Tower (where she worked in the labs). However, she barely left the tower and only slept in her apartment. She never had food stocked in the fridge. Just vodka in the freezer and some microwave meals stacked behind it.

So, when everything went into lockdown while she was asleep, she panicked.

Can I go to the grocery store? I don’t have any food.

She’d sent it in the tower group chat, hoping the resident Avengers would know more about the situation than she did.

Tin Man: What do you mean no food? You’re the one always making us come to family dinner at the tower.

She rolled her eyes and sent back: Yeah, at the tower. I don’t think I’ve ever eaten a meal in my apartment.

Tin Man: I’ll have JARVIS order essentials to be sent to your apartment with no-contact delivery.

HawkDaddy: I got the sickness, please send me soup.

Darcy frowned. It had only been a day since the quarantine started, how did he get sick so fast?

Tin Man: I only send delivery to my favorites.

HawkDaddy: :(

Darcy laughed and rolled her eyes. Her friends were so weird. But then again, she was friends with a bunch of super people. She couldn’t even make friends in her apartment complex because she was never there.

She ended up pulling her knitting supplies out from under her bed to make a Mjolnir-themed sweater for Thor. There wasn’t much work she could do from home since Jane was also not in the labs.

She knitted and had Ted Lasso on in the background on the TV until six, when there was a knock on her door. She startled, dropping a stitch, but quickly recovered and hurried to look through the peephole. Nobody there. She opened the door a crack and looked around, nobody was there. But when she looked down there were about forty bags of groceries in front of her door.

She shot a text to the group.

Holy Mjolnir. That is a lot of groceries.

She added a picture of the mountain of brown paper bags in front of her door.

Tony: You’re welcome, kiddo.

Darcy smiled. Tony could be very thoughtful sometimes. As she started hauling it all inside she took a look at what ‘the basics’ meant. It included oat milk, various canned goods and frozen vegetables, toilet paper and feminine hygiene products (her favorite brand of tampons… was he a mind reader?). He’d even sent her over a tin of brownies.

So, Darcy made it a hobby to be a homebody. As long as she could pass the time, she would be okay. One day turned into two, two into three, then it had been a week, two weeks, three weeks since the quarantine started. It took Darcy three weeks to realize a few things. She’d barely changed out of her pajamas in over a week. She hadn’t showered in nine days. She hadn’t ingested anything but coffee and Ritz crackers for six days. She hadn’t answered Jane’s video calls in three days. She’d been ignoring the group text for two, as it was starting to give her heart palpitations. She hadn’t even moved from the couch to go to her bed last night and woke up with a sore back.

She didn’t notice any of this, of course, until she got another video call. Thinking it was Jane, she just swiped it, but instead of swiping to end it, she accidentally swiped to answer it.

“Fuck!” She shouted as her phone slipped from her hand and onto the rug.

“You know a ‘hello’ would have worked, too,” so that was definitely not Jane’s voice.

“Tony?” she asked as she picked up the phone and looked at the man’s face. She wished she hadn’t though, as he immediately raised an eyebrow at her.

“Have you looked in a mirror like… At all in the past several days? That crust looks several days old, mamacita,” Darcy looked down at her sweaty t-shirt and mens boxer shorts self-consciously. “I mean your face, darling. Have you washed it recently?” His tone softened and that’s when Darcy realized something was wrong. Tony wasn’t soft with her. Sarcastic, sassy, nosy, that’s how she’d describe their relationship. But it was never this sincere.

“Hold on,” her voice was scratchy with disuse and she left her phone face up on the coffee table as she hurried over to her bathroom sink.

Shit. She looked like a wreck. Her hair was a greasy mess piled on top of her head. She couldn’t remember the last time she washed her face. It was a miracle she wasn’t developing acne. After she thoroughly scrubbed the grime off her face, she went to change into other pajamas, but she was thinning out. It was weird. She couldn’t find anything that fit right on her body so she just threw on a pair of blue gingham boxers and one of Tony’s stolen band t-shirts.

“That’s a little better,” Tony spoke when she came back to her phone. “Though I would suggest getting in the shower sometime soon.” She rolled her eyes at that. Maybe.

“Why did you video call me?” She pondered as she settled back down into her couch, feeling a little cleaner.

“You haven’t answered my texts in days. I’m allowed to worry about my friends, Darcy Lewis,” he raised both eyebrows at her and she winced. “I know this quarantine has been hard on everyone, but it’s also okay to not be okay. You’re used to being around people 24/7. You even said yourself that you never eat alone.”

“I’m fine,” she shrugged. “Just used to socializing and doing work. I’m not used to sitting still.”

“Are you sure that’s all? Jane said you haven’t been answering her either.”

“Jane snitched?” She gasped and narrowed her eyes. “Who else?”

Suddenly the man looked very innocent.

“I don’t know what you mean,” he spoke calmly with a lilt to his voice.

“Who else told you they’re worried about me?” Darcy wanted to cross her arms but she was stuck holding her phone.

“Jane and Thor, Clint, Natasha, Bruce, Steve-”

“How the fuck? What would they know? I don’t socialize with them outside of the tower so how the fuck would they know something was going on?” She spat, feeling a little defensive and teamed up on.

“You haven’t answered Jane’s calls, so she and Thor are concerned. Clint hasn’t seen you on X-Box live since the first week of quarantine, so he asked about you. Natasha seems to just know things, so she asked me to check in on you. Bruce knows what it’s like to have to be alone all of the time and was wondering how his favorite extrovert was doing. And Steve-”

“Go on, I’d like to hear this,” Darcy muttered. She’d had the biggest crush on Steve for the longest time, but they didn’t talk much since he didn’t work in the labs. They only socialized at family dinners and movie nights.

“He hasn’t heard you blast music in like six days,” Tony said with a quirked eyebrow. Darcy sputtered.

“What does that even mean?” She asked, throwing her free hand up.

“He lives next to you?” Tony said it like a question.

“I thought he lived at the tower,” Darcy frowned, eyeing up the wall she shared with the neighbor she’d never met.

“You- you didn’t know you lived next to Steve?” Tony asked exasperatedly. He shook his head and Darcy felt her cheeks heating. She wasn’t the most observant at times, and they’d been in quarantine for three weeks. It’s not like she was going outside. Plus, before that she was barely ever here. “This is a new level of unobservant. For someone who works in science, this is shocking.”

“It’s not that shocking,” she sputtered, scratching the back of her head. “I was barely ever here before all of this.”

“Fair, but still. For someone who has a Steve-radar, you probably could have figured it out. I mean,” he sighed. “You have the same commute. You work in the same building. When you leave movie night you go to the same place.”

“Yeah but usually I go to ang with Jane first,” Darcy felt like she had to defend herself. “I gotta go, I need to take a shower,” and with that, she cut him off and hung up with a huff. Who did he think he was, her father? Jeez.

As she stripped out of her fresh pajamas (probably not so fresh anymore since she’d been sweating nervously under Tony’s interrogative tone), she noticed even more how thin her fingers were looking, how cold she was. That was probably a bad thing.

However, the thoughts flew from her mind as she stepped into the hot spray of water and just leaned into it. It was nearly a religious experience. Or, it would have been, if she didn’t know that gods were just aliens. She took way too long in there, shampooing twice and just letting the hot water pour over her pale skin. She hadn’t been able to go outside and tan at all this summer with Jane being near a breakthrough and now with the quarantine.

All she’d done was knit and watch TV and cook. She finished Thor’s sweater and decided to knit one for all of the resident Avengers. Thor’s was maroon with little gold Mjolnirs all over it. Bruce’s was cream with little chemical structures all over it (she didn’t think he would wear a shirt with the Hulk all over it). Tony’s was black with a red and gold iron man helmet on the front and “I am Iron Man” on the back. Natasha’s was red with little knives and guns all over it. Clint’s (obviously) was purple with bows and arrows all over it, and “Legolas” on the back (Legolas was his favorite archer, how could Katniss or Merida even compare to an immortal elven archer?).

She was working on Steve’s now. He wasn’t all “apple pie America” in his free time, but she still wanted it to be cute and on theme. It was navy blue with a very complex eagle and waving american flag on it. Darcy was struggling, but she would be finished with it soon. She’d been knitting her whole life, her grandmother had taught her when she lived with her for a while.

She’d send them all out once they were done.

When Darcy finally exited the shower, fresh and smelling like roses and strawberries, she noticed she had another missed call from Jane and a few texts in the group chat. Her heart rate started ratcheting up. She could smell her deodorant in the air as she started sweating slightly. She licked her dry lips. Since when did she get anxious about group chats?

She took a look and smiled softly at her friends’ names.

Nat: I’ve come down with something. I blame Clint.

HawkDaddy: I was sick THREE WEEKS AGO. Why do you blame me?

Nat: You have a guilty face.

HawkDaddy: [download image]

Darcy quickly clicked on the attachment and giggled at Clint’s pouting face. She didn’t think before responding.

You know better than all of us that pouting is not going to sway Natasha’s opinion.

There was suddenly an influx of messages, and then Darcy remembered that she hadn’t responded in several days.

Nat: She’s right, you know.

That was the most normal response. Darcy had a feeling Natasha was the most emotionally intelligent one at the moment and didn’t want to make Darcy feel bad about falling into a depression hole.

HawkDaddy: Marceline the Vampire Queen has returned to us!

Tin Man: I think if anything, Short Stack is Princess Bubblegum.

Here’s Brucey: Darcy is Finn. She’s out here saving all of us all the time. Welcome back :)

Darcy smiled at that one. She’d convinced Clint and the scientists to watch Adventure Time.

America’s Ass: I am so confused.

America’s Ass: [download image]

Darcy laughed as she clicked on Steve’s gif. It was Lemongrab screaming ‘unacceptable.’ She didn’t know which was funnier: Steve not knowing what was going on and actually picking a gif from Adventure time, OR Steve having watched Adventure Time on his own and trolling them.

Alien of Thunder: My lightning sister has returned to the glorious group chat!

Alien of Thunder: This is cause for celebration!

Darcy sighed and smiled at her friends’ antics. Her anxiety had leveled out and she was feeling better than she had in days. First, she got to see Tony’s lovely face. Now she got to text with her friends.

However, it was time to finish Steve’s sweater.

“Friday,” she called out to the speaker in her living room. “Play ‘The Final Countdown,’” Darcy grinned a shark-like grin as she sat in her recliner and got her needles out. She could do this.

It was two more days before she called Tony again.

“What’s up stranger?” He asked when Darcy’s face popped up on the screen.

“I need to have something delivered to each of you. Can you help?” She looked over at the pile of sweaters wrapped in brown paper.

“Yeah, sure. Bruce did some tests on Steve and he seems to be immune due to his super DNA. He can pick it up and deliver it,” Tony was fiddling with a machine and Darcy nodded.

“I’ll text him then, thanks Tony!” And with that she hung up. Though she quickly shot a text to Steve.

I have a mission, should you choose to accept it.

While she waited, she decided to deep clean her room. Nothing would help her get out of her quarantine depression like summer cleaning! Once the entire apartment was vacuumed, mopped, dusted, and Lysol’d, she checked her phone again. Steve just replied.

Hit me with it.

She chuckled and sent back a picture of the stack of presents and the caption: I made something for each of you guys and I need help delivering it.

A moment later she sent another text: Tony said you were immune to the virus so I was wondering if you would help.

It only took a few minutes for Steve to reply.

Sure thing, Darcy :)

She smiled, he was genuinely one of the kindest people she��d met. He was just her type, too: tall, strong, he could swear like a sailor (not that he would let Tony know). While she was pondering her crush on the American icon, a knock sounded on her door, startling her out of her daydream and making her heart rate soar.

Hurrying over to the peephole, she let out a sigh of relief. It was Steve.

When she opened the door he looked down and smiled. When Darcy looked down, she noticed her outfit: a pair of black leggings (thankfully she had decided on pants that morning), and a “HULK SMASH” t-shirt with green and purple tie dye. Well, no use being bashful, she smiled gratefully at the man and let him in.

“I guess since you’re immune you’re allowed to come in,” she quipped and Steve chuckled.

“Thanks,” he rolled his eyes good-naturedly. “What did you make?”

“It’s a surprise,” Darcy winked and Steve felt a blush creep up his neck. “I can’t tell you because I made you one, too. You can’t open yours until everyone else has theirs, too. Okay? And no peeking at theirs. And don’t look in the group chat until you open it. Got it?”

“That’s a lot of rules, Darce,” he was smiling, standing in her newly cleaned apartment and in her personal space like it was totally normal and she hadn’t been isolated for nearly a month.

“I know, but it’s an important mission,” she loaded his arms up with little brown packages and sighed when he went to leave. He turned back to her with a curious look on his face. “It’s nice being able to see somebody in person,” she shrugged and he nodded sagely.

“Well, after I go see everyone I should self-isolate for a few days to make sure I’m not carrying any germs, but maybe after we can get together and watch a movie?” He cocked his head and smiled that winning smile at her.

“That would be lovely,” Darcy couldn’t help but return his smile, and hurried to escort him out. “No peeking!” She called as he laughed his way to the stairwell. He was such a good guy.

Darcy waited anxiously as Steve made his way to the tower and the other Avengers’ abodes. It was taking a little while though… Maybe he had walked? Darcy was nervously scrolling through her Instagram feed when the first message popped up.

It was a picture of Clint’s sweater.

HawkDaddy: Oh Em Gee, Darcy. It’s PERFECT.

Darcy felt warmth blooming in her chest at the sentiment. She loved giving to people. She thrived on happiness.

She kept quiet as the pictures started coming in. Tony was next, and then Bruce (probably working in the labs together with their N95 masks on).

Tin man: Short Stack, you’ve outdone yourself.

Attached was a photo of the sweater (front and back) compared to his actual face plate. It was pretty good, if she did say so herself.

Here’s Brucey: This is perfect, Darcy.

Bruce had actually included a selfie of himself giving a thumbs up. It made a giggle bubble up out of her chest. Nat was next, including a picture of her sweater next to her favorite knife and a handgun with the message: They are very realistic, I’m impressed.

That was a good compliment, and it went straight to Darcy’s head.

Thor was next, and he sent a picture of Jane absolutely drowning in the large sweater, and then a close up of a tiny knitted Mjolnir.

Alien of Thunder: A most excellent representation of my hammer, lightning sister. I shall wear it with pride.

Last, she waited for Steve to get home and open his.

When it finally came in, Darcy giggled at the image of Steve wearing a knitted sweater with an eagle and a billowing flag, hands on his hips. It was a sight to be seen.

America’s Ass: I’ve never worn a more appropriate sweater.

Darcy finally wrote in the group chat: Quarantine phase I: Darcy gets bored and knits everyone a sweater.

She was met with ‘LOL’s and laughing face emojis. Life was good for today, nothing dark on the horizon, she’d made her friends happy, and she had an upcoming movie night with Steve.

Darcy settled in on her couch and got ready for a night of Adventure Time.

Darcy spent two days in her post-sweater-delivery happy mood. Two excellent days where she showered, ate three meals, did a workout, messaged all of her friends. But reality set in. She didn’t know when she’d see them again. She didn’t know when she could hug Jane or go back to work. She hadn’t talked to Tony or Pepper but she was still getting her biweekly paychecks. She felt guilty about that. She felt guilty that she wasn’t brainy enough to help fix the virus or strong enough to have fought Dr. Doom’s minions.

So she was laying on her side on the couch listening to sad music on day three after the delivery. She hadn’t showered or eaten yet and it was four in the afternoon. Her phone buzzed and she ignored it, content to wallow in her Star Trek fleece jumpsuit. Her phone may have buzzed a few more times, but Darcy didn’t pay attention. She was busy having some time to herself.

She did just that for another three days, and took notice again of her slimming figure.

“Who knew depression holes and not being hungry would be the thing that finally helped me lose weight?” She asked the universe.

Darcy had gotten another shipment of food and supplies, but she didn’t Lysol down her door or clean each item before using them this time.

And she would pay for it.

She woke up on the sixth day after the sweater delivery feeling oh so tired. Figuring it was due to the lack of sustenance and exercise, Darcy decided to make herself some toast. She barely made it out of her room before the dizziness hit her.

Darcy sent a text to the group.

What are the symptoms? Help a girl out.

She started getting responses immediately.

HawkDaddy: Fever, body aches, fatigue

Nat: Dizziness, lessened appetite

Tin Man: Runny nose, sinus congestion, vomiting

Darcy gulped from her position on the floor (she sat down in the doorway when she started getting dizzy).

How many do I have to have before I have to go see a doctor?

She groaned as she sent the message and pulled herself up, trudging into her kitchen. The thought of ingesting anything nauseated her, so she made her way back to the couch, where she promptly fell asleep.

She woke up at noon choking on her own snot.

“Fuck,” she got the word out before she stumbled into the kitchen to blow her nose. After she’d friction burned her nose by using napkins as tissues, she slowly walked back to the couch (thanks dizziness) to check her phone. Three missed video calls from Tony, one from Jane, and a lot of texts.

America’s Ass: Are you alright, Darcy?

That was not in the group, it was a separate message, so Darcy answered that with a message before looking at the group.

I woke up super tired, super dizzy. Was awake for five minutes before I passed out on the couch. Woke up a disgusting mess and had to blow my nose with napkins because I don’t own tissues. So no, probably not.

Then, she checked the group chat. It was basically a conspiracy theory contest to guess what had happened to Darcy over the past few hours. Had she passed out from sickness? Gotten annoyed and started ignoring them? Fell down the stairs? Gotten kidnapped?

She shook her head and looked down at Steve’s next text.

I’ll make you some soup. Drink lots of water and get lots of rest.

She smiled at the sentiment. Steve was really sweet. She did what he said and grabbed a cup of water before retreating to the couch and scrolling through her Facebook. She kept getting group texts, though, so she put her phone away and threw on some mindless TV.

Darcy woke up to a knock on her door. It startled her, but she figured it was probably Steve. Nobody else would risk coming into contact with another human being. Darcy shuffled over to the door in her fleece pajama pants and birthday hedgehog t-shirt (a classic pajama day outfit) and looked through the peephole. She was right, Steve was awaiting her.

“Hey Darce,” he smiled down at her when she opened the door. “How are you feeling?”

“Like garbage,” she muttered. “Please, come in,” he stepped inside with a Tupperware full of noodle soup. “Oh my god, you really made me soup?” She looked up at him with wide eyes and he smiled bashfully.

“Friends don’t let friends get sick and not have soup,” he laughed and Darcy turned, misty eyed, towards the kitchen. People didn’t often do nice things for her, that was her job.

“You’re a lifesaver, Steven,” she spoke once she’d gotten control of her emotions and ushered him towards the kitchen table. “Come, sit with me,” she groaned as she lowered herself into the chair. The body aches were coming in waves.

“How are you holding up?” He asked once the two were sitting and Darcy had a full bowl of steaming soup in front of her.

“Well I think I’ve definitely got the virus. Either that or I’ve got a serious case of the flu. But I got my flu shot this year so…” She trailed off and shrugged. Steve frowned and reached over to press the back of his hand against her forehead. She tried not to act startled at the contact. It had been… Some amount of weeks since she’d touched another person.

“You do feel warm, do you have a thermometer?” She shook her head at his inquiry and the frown deepened. She didn’t like making Steve frown.

“Is it even worth going to the doctor?” She sighed and slouched into her chair. “It’s not like they can do anything but tell me to ride it out.”

“They could always prescribe you something for the symptoms,” he shrugged, looking thoughtful. “Something for the dizziness and aches.”

“Maybe, I’ll consider it,” she took a careful spoonful of soup and frowned. “I can’t taste it. Why can’t I taste it?” She took another spoonful and looked up at Steve with wide eyes. “Is that a thing?”

“I don’t know, I haven’t been keeping up with the news since it doesn’t really affect me,” he trailed off with a sheepish look on his face. “I’ll ask Tony.” He whipped out his smartphone and shot a text to Tony, fingers flying over the keyboard.

“I’m so sad I can’t taste your soup,” she was full of woe. “This is a travesty,” she whined and set the spoon back down. “I wasn’t even hungry and now I can’t taste anything?” She looked up at Steve with a pout.

“You should still eat, Darcy. I know it’s not super pleasant, but you need fuel,” he offered her a sympathetic smile, and gestured for her to take another bite, which she did (albeit slowly and with less excitement). “Tony said loss of smell and taste is a common symptom,” Darcy stood abruptly, ignoring the dizziness to find her lighter and light the ocean scented candle that had been sitting on her counter for a year. She lit it without preamble and then leaned in to give it a good sniff.

“Awe, come on,” she bemoaned, looking at Steve with that rumpled kitten look that made him want to wrap her up in a blanket and cuddle her.

“No scent either, huh?” He asked and she nodded, blowing out the candle before returning to her soup. “You’ll get through this. I’d be happy to drive you to the doctor if you’re not feeling well enough to drive,” Steve offered and Darcy was struck once again by how kind this man was.

“You’re too nice, Steve. Someone’s going to snatch you up one day,” she winked conspiratorially at him. He flushed, and she smiled inwardly. “Though, I don’t have a physician. I just go to medical at the tower.”

Steve hummed in understanding. It made sense for her, she lived, ate, and worked in the tower. No need to find a physician elsewhere when she could get treated at the state of the art facilities right nearby.

“To the tower then?” He asked as Darcy took the last few bites of her soup.

“To the tower,” she confirmed.

“Would you like to go now?”

She thought for a moment.

“Let me change and grab a mask from Tony’s most recent grocery drop. And then I’ll be ready,” she wanted to rush, but moving too fast had her head spinning. So, she shuffled over to her room, one hand on the wall at all times to keep her precarious balance.

Once she was in a pair of comfy leggings and a warm sweater (this one was violet), she threw a beanie over her slightly dirty hair and slapped a mask on her face.

“I’m ready,” her voice was muffled and Steve raised his eyebrows.

“It’s summer, and you have a fever,” he was nearly chiding her and she pouted. Unfortunately, the look went unnoticed past her mask.

“I’m chilly,” she finally said and he got that worried look again.

“Come on,” he held his arm out for her to take and she latched on gratefully. The dizziness was getting to her. “I texted Tony and asked him to have someone ready at medical for us,” he spoke softly as they headed for the elevator. It was a short ride down, and not too long by the time they made it to the tower.

“Short Stack, you look severely overdressed,” Tony was also wearing a mask, maybe two by the looks of it. He eyed their linked arms and quirked an eyebrow. “What’s that about?” He wasn’t one to mince words.

“Tony, now is not the time,” Darcy grunted through her mask. “I am freezing, I am dizzy, I sneezed into this mask more than once. I need Steve to help keep me from falling over. Are we good here?” She narrowed her eyes, attempting to get her frustration across without the lower half of her face. It worked.

“Right as rain, follow me,” Darcy could see his fingers flying over his fancy phone, but couldn’t tell who he was messaging. Her phone wasn’t vibrating, so it was unlikely to be the group chat.

When they made it to medical, Steve helped Darcy into a chair and then stood there for a moment, looking out of place.

“You’re welcome to stay and sit, Steve. You could also go explore the tower or something but I am unlikely to stand up without assistance again,” she spoke quietly, and he gave her a little smile before sitting down next to her.

“Not much for me to do in the tower, what with everybody being home from work,” he shrugged. “I have been going a little stir crazy.”

“You and I both. I miss Jane and her crazy science benders. I miss all of the scientists, actually,” Darcy frowned, picking at her fingernails (a habit she’d picked up recently). “I miss family dinner nights,” she muttered and Steve nodded in agreement.

“You do make excellent dinners, and it’s nice having some off-time with the others,” he added and she smiled with her eyes.

“Thanks, Steve-o.”

It looked like he wanted to say something else (she could tell because he didn’t need to wear a mask), but doctor McCoy walked in.

“You look tired, doc,” Darcy commented. There were red lines around where his mask sat on his face, and his usually fiery eyes were dulled.

“It’s been a long few weeks, Lewis,” he countered and she nodded. “Captain Rogers,” he nodded to Darcy’s escort and the super soldier nodded back.

“Bones has been dealing with me since I moved to the tower. For all sorts of things,” Darcy explained their familiarity.

“You come here a lot?” Steve asked with a concerned laugh.

“I get into a lot of lab accidents. One time Thor hugged me too hard and bruised my ribs. Clint once fell out of the vents and onto me and gave me a head injury. For someone as robust looking as I am, I am quite fragile,” she shrugged at Steve’s bewildered look.

“Well you are only human,” Doctor McCoy noted before getting into professional mode and taking her vitals.

“Why are you called Bones?” Steve asked when he was taking Darcy’s temperature.

“It’s a nickname his college roommate gave him, you tell him doc,” Darcy smirked and the good doctor rolled his eyes.

“My wife got everything in the divorce. I got nothin left but my bones,” he sighed dramatically before announcing that she had a fever. “What other symptoms are you having?” As they got into the nitty gritty, Steve reclined in his chair and watched with interest. It seemed like Darcy had friends everywhere. In medical, in the labs, with the security team and the Avengers. Hell, he’d even seen her bring coffee down to accounting before.

“I’m gonna be straight with you, Lewis,” the doctor sighed, looking down at his notes. “There’s not much I can do for this virus but treat the symptoms and hope you ride this out. You can take this for the fever, and this for the runny nose and sneezing,” he looked up at her as he passed the post it note over. “Not much I can do for your taste, smell, and dizziness, but I’d suggest keeping in contact with your resident super soldier in case something happens,” he eyed Steve up at that, and the other man nodded his agreement. “Drink lots of water, invest in some gatorade. Don’t drink it straight, mix it half and half with water. It tastes gross but it’s better for you. Get some rest, and I suggest finding a show to binge watch until you’re feeling better.”

“Any recommendations for that, Doc?”

“I highly recommend Star Trek,” he murmured with a smile.

“And any recommendations on how to stop being so fucking depressed about this quarantine situation?” She was half joking, and the doctor chuckled.

“Damn it Lewis,” he shook his head. “I’m a doctor, not a therapist,” it actually made her laugh, and Steve was disappointed by how muffled it sounded from behind her mask.

“I’ll have to find one of those, then,” she laughed as she went to get up, holding onto the back of the chair. “Thanks for these, doc,” she waved the paper in front of her and latched onto Steve when he offered his arm again.

“Take care of yourself,” he called as the two left the room.

“He seems like a swell guy,” Steve commented and Darcy hummed.

“He is. He deserves better than what he got, but it is what it is,” she shrugged. “You ready to head home, soldier?” She looked up at him and he got the feeling she was smiling.

“Sure am,” he replied, and when they got back Darcy shooed Steve off for a little while so she could take a bath and clean up.

“Want to come over for a movie later?”

“As long as it’s not The Hunger Games again,” Steve laughed and Darcy smirked, now that her mask was off.

“What, Clint’s favorite is getting to you?”

“I’m just curious how he gets to pick every time,” Steve emphasized as he made his way to the door.

Darcy only shrugged.

“We pick based on arbitrary things. Who ate the most pop tarts this week. Who wore the least amount of yellow. Who won the prank war. Etcetera,” she shrugged.

Steve only rolled his eyes before he waved and left.

Darcy sagged. Walking around and being peppy had exhausted her. Since when did she need to recharge after socializing. When this was all over, she’d need to reacclimate to her extroverted life.

They watched Star Trek that night (the one with Chris Pine) and Darcy stayed sick for four more days. She was avidly enjoying the group chat and her Netflix subscription since she couldn’t focus enough to knit and couldn’t do much else. Steve came by often to hang out or share meals with her. Sometimes they just sat on the couch and talked. It was nice getting to know him better. She’d always had a surface relationship with him. Not in a bad way, but they were both always busy.

When she was feeling better, she knitted him a pair of comfy socks and baked him some molasses cookies in thanks. He said it wasn’t a problem, he liked spending time with her. She blushed profusely but insisted he take them.

Darcy sometimes felt so unbearably lonely and sad, feeling stuck in her own home was hard. But she checked herself and reminded herself that she was very lucky. Not everyone got to hang out with a super soldier on the daily. Someone who couldn’t get sick. It was hard to remind herself that she had it better than a lot of people. But then again, a lot of people didn’t live alone and had their families to be around. It was weird. She wasn’t sure if she should be grateful or guilty.

She talked about her conflicting feelings with Steve a week after she got better.

“I just don’t know whether I should be grateful that I have you, and that I’m not alone, or whether I should feel guilty that I still feel stuck here and lonely when I do have you. Or on the third hand, whether I should be feeling some sort of way that I haven’t picked up a new skill or started working out in the past…” She trailed off and started counting her fingers. “Nearly seven weeks?”

Steve nodded.

“Nearly seven weeks,” he said with a sigh. They were both hoping the brains of the operation would have figured out a cure or a vaccine by now. She knew they were close, but it was so hard to figure out something when you had to be so careful of working around others. “But you shouldn’t feel bad, Darcy. I mean, I feel guilty that I am not being affected the way everyone else is, but I’m still alone a lot. And I am grateful to be around you so much. I have to quarantine for everyone else’s sake in case I can carry the virus,” he shrugged. “It’s a tough situation and it’s been hard on all of us. But that doesn’t make your feelings any less valid.”

“You’re very emotionally intelligent for someone who is like… mentally around thirty,” Darcy smiled softly and Steve huffed a laugh.

“Thanks, I think. I just spent a lot of my young adult life being left out of things and having to deal with them on my own, with only Bucky,” he sighed. “You have to learn to deal with the emotional and mental side of things when physically you’re like… Five foot two and a hundred pounds soaking wet.”

Darcy let out a little laugh.

“Not relatable, dude. I mean yeah, I’m five foot three. So pretty close. But I haven’t been under a hundred pounds since middle school,” she gestured vaguely at her chest. “When I got the girls, it added like five pounds minimum,” she shook her head good naturedly and Steve chuckled.

“I couldn’t even imagine being a woman in this day and age,” he sighed.

“I couldn’t imagine being a tiny ball of rage and righteousness in the thirties and forties,” Darcy countered and they shared a laugh.

Darcy had been counting. It was July when it all started. It would be September 20th on the morrow. But Tony had texted in the group. Some students at Oxford had come up with a vaccine and were working on it with a group of American doctors and scientists.

Darcy got vaccinated in November and was back at the tower (without a mask) by December.

“Jane!” Darcy squealed when she saw her tiny boss tinkering with a machine.

“Darcy!” Unlike previous encounters where Jane would ignore her for a machine, the scientist ran over to Darcy and they embraced each other.

“Can I get in on this group hug?” Clint climbed with supreme agility from the overhead air vent.

“Naturally, you jack-booted thug,” Jane said with misty eyes and a wavering voice. The two women were suddenly enclosed in a big circle of biceps.

“I have notified Sir of the group hug. The others will be here shortly,” JARVIS spoke and Darcy giggled, happy to see all of her friends again. Soon Tony, Nat, Bruce, and Thor were all joining in. Steve walked in on it and Darcy had an idea.

“Have y’all ever heard of a cinnamon roll hug?” She broke away from the group to grab Steve’s hand and pull him towards the commotion.

“Never.”

“Nope.”

“Sounds interesting.”

She nodded at the responses. She could make it work.

“We did it in college for team bonding. Everyone hold hands and stand in a straight line,” they did as instructed, and Darcy smirked. Thor would love this.

“Thor, start rolling in. Like a cinnamon roll,” Darcy instructed and Thor rolled into Jane, hands still holding. “Now Jane, follow. And everyone roll into it,” soon they were a big circle of hands and torsos and giggles. “Now let go of your hands,” she waited a moment before giving the final instruction. “Now, hug!” They were a mess of giggles by the end of it, but with Thor at the center smiling like a dork and everyone else shaking their heads and smiling, it was worth it.

“I don’t know how you come up with this stuff,” Steve commented once it was just he and Darcy. Jane had run off to get a piece of equipment.

“I learned a lot in college, just not about anything important,” she laughed and Steve smiled down at her warmly.

“Darcy?” He asked, leaning against the doorway.

“Mmhm?” She hummed, making her way towards him.

“Now that we’re out of isolation…” He trailed off as she came to stand closer than arm’s length away from him. “Would you want to get dinner with me?” He gave her that shy half-smile and she couldn’t help but beam up at him.

“I would love nothing more.”

#darcy lewis #steve rogers #steve rogers x darcy lewis #fanfic #fanfiction #ao3 #shieldshock

10 notes · View notes

startwithbrooklyn · 3 years

Text

THE GREAT ND REWATCH OF 2021 / OCTOBER 3, 2019 // the trial

(TW SUICIDE)

it's the reveal!!!! love that for her hope shes thriving (shes not) again w the two minutes of the next episode to sync the dates

-lmaoooo so i honestly wonder why they went for the full pulling-it-out-the-throat thing but idk (an interesting foil to her getting sick for more stereotypical reasons ie s2 "people find out theyre grandparents every day"

-I LOVE THIS GEORGE HAIR

-"i'd do anything for nancy" okay but....why 👀bit of an odd reaction imo

-bess with spilling the truth again 😂and gets shot down. tragic #shetried

-wait sooooo nobody tested the fingerprints on the knife when this shit happened?? or that tech didnt exist in 2000? i mean without a body how could they even call it murder? and who told the police?? like if the drews took the baby, the dress, and said nothing, who tells the cops shes missing or even dead? how did they know to search the bluffs? who told the media/public? it had to have happened that same night because ryan said when he got there later there were already rumors she was killed. after the baby and bloody dress, only her crown, a knife, and tire tracks were left. how did anyone find anything at this remote bluff without some kind of tip off? and why on earth would they think murder and not suicide with so little evidence?? thats gotta be like suicide central, sorry for the trigger

-"a little help, lucy?!" lucy seems unable to disobey a direct request from nancy (ie "lucy, stop" from later in the ep) when nancy speaks directly to her. so maybe if nancy had spoken aloud/engaged more lucy could have appeared more? nancy said she only comes around when she wants to but what if nancy herself could do a bit more, being the last thing lucy touched and all

-so in ep 2 when nancys in jail carson says "great grandma rosalind buried her valuables in the trunk" including the knives shown here. did carson and kates families even know about nancy? how did they explain not announcing a pregnancy or birth?

-"oh." john lmfaoooo

-BESS lmaoooo and ace's looks in the background and then at seeing nick approaching lmfaooo oh no / also why on earth is she apologizing?? he dumped her but she has to be sorry he found out she fucked someone else? someone nicer pls explain to me bc i dont get it. she dont owe him shit

-george is SO CUTE lmfaoooo and so forward and he was so shook but then he was like "oh hell yeah"

-"is he a vampire?!" ik nobody i knew got that reference 😂

-this entire search of the claw is a sham. what are they even looking for. clearly a set up by tamura but why/what does he suspect them of. esp w karen as accomplice, story should be airtight so why are they still investigating?

-john + ace dream team 💙

-god ace is such a yes-man. why is he so fucking loyal?? people like him are insane. how are they real. i suspect they arent. and no matter what you do you are never worthy of their unending loyalty anyway.

-so in the Good Place nancy was the one who had the key but in reality its ryan

-wonder if lucy's listening to ryan here talking about his love and grief for her

-"you were throwing away your future on a nothing girl" - nancy & ryan - their fathers dont want them to see "troubled" kids, want them to focus on school instead --> which they both struggle with and eventually do not achieve (maybe bc they want their kids to leave horseshoe bay?) for nancy its an interesting vice for someone whos really a goody two shoes/for ryan its subverted bc karen actually did worse than him ie committed real crimes

-"stay away from my family" surprise bitch bet you thought youd seen the last of me 😉

-interestingly, ryan probably would have agreed with karen about switching the ballot boxes but he wouldnt have really understood the social consequences. both josh and karen are determined to see ryan as the bad guy when actually he didnt do anything, they did. 🤔

-karen is such a ride or die friend. again w the loyalty. if someone swapped ballot boxes for me i'd be touched. im sure going into active labor made lucy a bit upset but damn. what a friend.

-wonder when nancy starts calling her "Lucy" instead of "dead lucy"

-lucy primarily haunting her own house/love seeing this house overtaken by nature

-the concept of writing things down : starting from the first ep, nancy's journal (then and now), writing out simon cards, similar cemetary cards in the Good Place, "beautiful minding it," culminating in lucy's journal / writing it down to help figure it out/when theres too much going on to keep it inside

-"i'll make a salad" NICK LMAOOO

-wonder what happened to carson's old lawyer?

-"my testimony begins in the summer of 1999" because your story always starts with your mother's story

-lmfaoooooo this shit taking the stand is soooo never allowed but oh well

-"she stole a knife" and carson's face lmfaooooo he knows its not true but what could he fucking say?? no?

-"i love you mom, i hope you never find this." ironic bc nancy didnt want her dad to find her journal either

-lucy never wanted anyone to find out how she died d/t shame- but she didnt want carson to go to jail for it so she finally allowed it (or just couldnt refuse nancy asking)

-"i'm sorry for what you lost"/"i'm never gonna be free from them"

-awww ace/mcginnis goodbye / i wonder if ace is nervous thinking about tamura --> ace's dad since chief mcginnis covered for ace out of respect for his dads sacrifice but tamura would throw both ace and his dad under the bus just to get at nancy (get at her via ace? since he was already used as the blackmail plot device? they kinda touched in this in s2 but not fully)

-okay sooo why are they still doing this forensic analysis thing? like the whole things over so whats the point. i wonder if john had packed up and gone home what coulda happened

-nancy/carson - interrupted moments:

•family dinner interrupted by nancy's accsations

•being home after finding ted interrupted by carson's arrest

•celebration of dropped charges interrupted by nancy discovering the truth about her parentage

-"i cooked your favorite to celebrate" ironic bc shes upset that hes not her "real" dad but he IS because he knows her best. like theyre literally proving it right in front of her. vs ryan whom she doesnt really want anyway AND rejects requests to get to know her. like come on sis. his 20 years of parenting you arent going away, ever. deal w it.

-carson's little smile before he said "'mom never hurt lucy" like he knows this is the end / scott's acting here just kills me

~~~~~~~~~

-why did the drews come back at all? and why did kate really keep the dress? carson says she did it as a link to lucy, but did kate want to keep it to be connected to lucy? or did she bury it to keep lucy repressed? is this a positive or a negative? +keeping in attic - did lucy start to haunt kate, so she unburied the dress?

and lastly:

-why doesnt lucy haunt everett and celia hudson? she kind of does ie painting but only when nancy visits bc shes actually haunting nancy. isnt everything the hudsons' fault?

#brooklyn's ND primer #nancy drew cw #tw suicide #the Great Rewatch of 2021 #you best start believing in ghost stories miss drew - you're in one

2 notes · View notes

priorireverte · 3 years

Photo

Congratulations Lizzie!

Your application for Narcissa Malfoy has been accepted. Another time I will ramble about the power of mothers in the Harry Potter Series, but for now let it suffice to say we have our third of the Mother’s Love Trio.

Please look to the checklist for the next steps and reach out if you have any questions!

OUT OF CHARACTER

NAME & PRONOUNS: Lizzie she/her

TIMEZONE: GMT

ACTIVITY LEVEL: Because they’re long threads, I’ve been preferring to let them build up and tackle them all at one when it comes to replies – but I am always around for plotting!

ANYTHING ELSE: Same triggers as before woo!

CHARACTER DETAILS

NAME: Narcissa Malfoy (nee Black)

BIRTHDATE: 27th May, 1955

DEATHDATE: n/a

GENDER, PRONOUNS, and SEXUALITY: Narcissa identifies as cis female, using she/her pronouns. She also identifies as heterosexual. Her gender and sexuality have always just made sense to her, and she is lucky in that her identity is considered ‘normal’. Whilst she grew up very comfortable in herself, she knows that might not always be the case and so she made sure that Draco grew up in an accepting environment, at least from her perspective.

BLOOD STATUS: Pureblood

HOUSE ALUMNI: Slytherin

OCCUPATION: Narcissa is not employed, but she has never felt as though she didn’t have an occupation. She ran Malfoy Manor after Lucius and her were married and dedicated her entire being to raising Draco to the best of her ability. Whilst nannies or governesses were available to her and she was encouraged by her mother to take advantage of them, Narcissa was steadfast in her desire that she was going to raise her son. She also stands as counsel for Lucius and has done for their whole marriage. She might have been raised to be a lady, but Narcissa has always been clever in her own right, advising her husband as she could.

FACECLAIM: Kathryn Winnick

CHARACTER BACKGROUND

POSTBELLUM

Narcissa never wanted any part in the war. She knew who she was marrying, what kind of reputation both his family and hers had, but she had always believed that part of Lucius’ life could stay out of their home. Then the war turned everything upside down and no matter how much she loves Lucius she cannot help but blame him. Since the war has ended, she’s accepted that he is and was simply a man who made mistakes, but she still hasn’t truly forgiven him. Narcissa blames him for Draco being put in danger, blames him for the fact that she nearly lost the person who means the most to her in the world.

Since the war ended, Narcissa has kept mostly to the manor. She doesn’t want to deal with the accusing looks and hostile interactions she knows she will be met with. She goes out when she needs to and appears to the world as aloof as she always has. In truth, the words and looks do get to her. She knows they were on the wrong side of the war and she regrets the things her family were responsible for. Not just Lucius, but Bellatrix as well. However, Narcissa has never regretted and will never regret the actions she took to keep her son safe.

The news of the Returned has stirred a lot of complex emotions up for Narcissa. She’s glad, somehow, that some of the tragedy caused by the wars might begin to be undone. Her heart is particularly with Andromeda, who she knows lost so much during the war, and might now have a chance to heal. Just as strong as the joy, is the fear. She has no wish to see any Death Eaters who fell rise again. Not even her sister. The person Bellatrix was when she died was not the sister who Narcissa remembered; she had been corrupted and driven mad. She finally feels like her family’s life is getting back on track, building trust with Lucius again and trying her hardest not to smother Draco as he makes his way in the world. Her sister’s return would ruin everything.

PERSONALITY What are they good at? What do they struggle with? What are their strengths and weaknesses?

Narcissa is surprisingly empathetic, though she certainly knows how to hide it. She feels others’ pain so acutely and it was this which helped undo years of indoctrination into the Pureblood mindset. This makes her an incredibly caring individual once you’re past the layers of aloofness and the austere nature she has carefully cultivated.

She can struggle to let people in, scared of showing a weakness that people will take advantage of. She can’t trust that not everyone is going to want to take something or use her for something, a trait only heightened by her experience in the war. As such, Narcissa isn’t often forthright unless it’s with those close to her. She will always be defensive; every strong emotion she hides in indifference.

BRIEF OVERVIEW OF FAMILY

The Black family had one rule: be perfect. Of course, within that were lots of different rules. As Narcissa experienced it, the pressure mostly came from her mother. Narcissa looked far more like a Rosier than a Black and Druella took it upon herself to mould Cissa into a perfect pureblood lady. Etiquette, manners, how muggleborns were the scourge of the Wixen world. Druella was cold and she was cruel and no matter how much Narcissa tried she never seemed to be enough. She never stopped trying though, wanting to make her parents proud. It didn’t seem that important to anyone that Narcissa had thoughts of her own but develop them she did. She had no wish to end up a trophy wife, so she studied hard at school whilst still acting as the perfect daughter to her parents. Parents aside, Narcissa absolutely adored her sisters. Andromeda was far easier to get along with, despite adoring Bellatrix there was an intensity in her eldest sister which always slightly scared Narcissa. She couldn’t help but feel betrayed when Andromeda left, when she chose Ted Tonks over them. At that point Narcissa didn’t much care that Ted was a muggleborn, she cared that her sister had never trusted her enough to share the secret. She was still young and foolish and she turned her back on her sister with the rest of the family, even if her heart wasn’t fully in it. The loss of one sister pushed her harder towards the other, and despite Bellatrix’s unnerving devotion to dark magic Narcissa committed herself to keeping a strong bond with her sister.

HISTORY What was their life before the end of the war in ‘98 or before their death? What was important and formative for them?

(N.B I say here that Cygnus and Druella were hoping for a boy here. I know that inheritance is gender neutral in the Wixen world, I believe they more hoped for a boy in order to literally carry on the Black family name, as the Blacks have historically thought their family (as carried in their name) to be worth more than others. Hope that makes sense!)

Cygnus and Druella were still hoping for a boy when Narcissa was born and not only was she a girl, she barely looked like a member of the Black family. Bright blue eyes and blonde hair which was almost white, she took after her mother’s side of the family and that perhaps spared her the disappointment which was inherent in all her father’s interactions with her older sisters. She was so wholly not what her father had wanted, his disappointment was instead indifference. On reflection, Narcissa can see that she was spoiled, constantly told she was the prettiest sister, the perfect little lady. She can also see now that when that attention was laved upon her, it was always to the detriment of her sisters. At the time though, she simply became entirely possessed with her own beauty and in being as perfect as she kept being told she was. There was no real affection from either of her parents, but even the smallest praise was something Narcissa would treasure. She didn’t begin to realise how cruel her mother could be until she approached puberty and everything she did became open to censure. She was getting fat, growing too fast and too tall, told no man would want to marry her if she carried on the way she was. Hogwarts was an escape for her, not being monitored at meal times to make sure she didn’t overeat, no-one taking her books away because she should have been studying music instead. It was during her time at Hogwarts that she began to privately question the strong anti-muggle beliefs she had been taught from a young age. Narcissa thrived, but she always had to return to the family manor over the summers and deal with an increasingly strict Druella.

After Hogwarts came the expectation of marriage and that pressure only increased when Andromeda left the family. Andromeda’s departure also pushed Narcissa back towards her family’s belief in supremacy, it was too hard for her to process just why she felt so betrayed by her sister, so it was easier to go along with the family line that it was because she’d run off with a muggleborn. Her heart was never really in it, but she knew to keep that to herself.

No matter what has happened between them, Narcissa still considers marrying Lucius to be one of the happiest days of her life and once of the best things to ever happen to her (second only to the birth of Draco). She loves her husband so completely, even though that love has certainly been tested over the years. Draco is the brightest shining spot in Narcissa’s whole life. She would, and has, done anything she could to protect him. Even when he was just a toddler and the worst things she had to protect him from were imagined monsters under his bed. The peace between the wars were the happiest years of her life, getting to raise Draco and live in what felt like domestic bliss. Fear began to creep back in as she heard of the events that began to happen at Hogwarts, fear that maybe there would be another war which could endanger her family. That danger was made all too real when Bellatrix escaped Azkaban and Lucius was sent there. Her sister no longer felt like her sister and her home was no longer her home. Worst of all, Draco was punished for Lucius’ error. Narcissa would have done anything to take the punishment instead, but she had to figure out a way to protect Draco in any way she could. She never gave up hope that Lucius would be returned to her, that his time in Azkaban would not leave him as damaged as it had left her sister, and that he would see how stupid it was to still stand on Voldemort’s side. Narcissa truly believed that even if Voldemort won, her family would never know peace. So she did what she could, to protect her family through the worst.

OOC EXPLORATION

WHAT ARE YOU MOST LOOKING FORWARD TO?

When I first applied, I was trying to decide between Ginny and Narcissa and I wrote apps for both. I’ve played Narcissa many times before and I love the complexities of her character, but I decided to take a risk on Ginny who was new to me in a rp setting. Now, I’m excited to play a character well known to me in a completely fresh setting. I’ve never played post-war Narcissa and I am so filled with inspiration for her!

ANYTHING ELSE?

Pinterest board here, because I am That Person.

Also headcanons (tw: miscarriage, tw: eating disorder)

I think Narcissa always wanted a family, and probably wanted a large one. Not too large, but she never intended to have just one child. The early years of her marriage to Lucius though were plagued with fertility issues and she suffered more than one miscarriage during this period. When Draco came along, a healthy viable pregnancy, Narcissa was overjoyed. No matter her joy, delivery took a toll on her and whilst it would have been technically possible, she was advised it would be unsafe for her to carry another child to term. She was devastated, but she poured all that sadness and anger into loving Draco as much as she could.

Druella’s controlling nature and constant badgering about Narcissa’s weight definitely led to her having an incredibly unhealthy relationship with food. She suffered from bulimia for most of her teens and into her early twenties. It was when she and Lucius started trying to have children that she began to fix her relationship with food and she knew she needed to be healthy to support a child.

#narcissa malfoy #narcissa black #prioriacceptance

11 notes · View notes

doomonfilm · 3 years

Text

Memories : Top 15 Films of 2020

If 2020 taught movie fans anything, it was that we shouldn’t take things for granted. On the dollars and cents side of things, movie theaters were already facing an uphill battle to stay sustainable, but the “shelter-in-place” practice of March and beyond decimated box office returns, with many theaters yet to reopen (if they will open at all). In terms of famous names and faces, the list of those who passed away featured numerous icons : Kobe Bryant, Kirk Douglas, Max von Sydow, Honor Blackman, Carl Reiner, Ennio Morricone, John Saxon, Wilford Brimley, Chadwick Boseman, Sean Connery, Tiny Lister Jr., Adolfo ‘Shabba Doo’ Quinones and many more transitioned to the great beyond. Netflix, Hulu, Amazon Prime, Shudder and a number of other streaming services saw themselves step into the forefront of the entertainment provider realm, with Warner Brothers and a handful of other studios making announcements that they will be following suit for at least 2021, if not for good.

With all of this uncertainty and chaos, however, the year 2020 was a surprisingly strong one, in my opinion, when it came to cinematic output... so much so, in fact, that aside from a number of Honorable Mentions, my list of top films was expanded to 15 in order to accommodate all of my choices. For anyone who has checked out my lists from previous years, you will know that I did not see every film released this year, but I did make my best effort to cover as wide a range of films as possible. Enjoy the list, and be sure to support film in whatever medium you are able to moving forward so that it can thrive.

HONORABLE MENTIONS

The 40-Year-Old Version (dir. Radha Blank) A nice little personal film that spoke to my hip-hop sensibility, as well as that ever-present awareness of the inevitability of age, and how it can skew our perspective in regards to our achievements.

Ava (dir. Tate Taylor) This isn’t the action film that’s going to reinvent the wheel, but if you look at action films like wheels, this is a quality wheel. Outside of Common, I couldn’t really find much to shoot down... this will definitely be one I consider the next time I have company and we’re looking for something fun to check out.

Bill & Ted Face The Music (dir. Dean Parisot) I honestly would have been satisfied with just two films in this franchise, but surprisingly, a third entry was created that didn’t ruin my overall enjoyment of the previous two films. Keanu Reeves and Alex Winter jumped in without missing a beat, a healthy dose of familiar faces popped back up, and the new cast additions weren’t too jarring... it’s nice to know that a pair of my favorite childhood films are officially now part of a trilogy.

Borat Subsequent Moviefilm: Delivery of Prodigious Bribe to American Regime for Make Benefit Once Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan (dir. Jason Woliner) This was possibly the most surprising release of 2020... outside of a couple of news blips that Sacha Baron Cohen made during production, not a lot about this film was leaked prior to its release. For such a dated character and a seemingly outdated style of humor, Borat once again exposed the simplest parts of society in an incredibly insightful (albeit cringey as all get-out) manner.

Guns Akimbo (dir. Jason Lei Howden) One of the most fun films of 2020. Somewhere, the creative minds behind Nerve are wishing that they’d made this film instead.

Henrietta and Her Dismal Display of Affection (dir. Jeffrey Garcia) Jeffrey Garcia is the homie, and I’ve had the pleasure of being in a number of his short films, so when he announced his intentions to write and shoot a feature film in 2020, I was completely on-board. Miraculously, he was able to film the movie while the world was being ravaged by COVID-19, and though I cannot publicly announce details yet, this film has definitely already met (and likely succeeded) his expectations.

The Midnight Sky (dir. George Clooney) With each film that George Clooney directs, I realize more and more than he is an old soul trapped in a body idolized by the new school of film. That being said, it’s nice to know that there are directors out there willing to embrace patient, silent and contemplative moments while simultaneously withholding from force-feeding viewers exposition.

Tenet (dir. Christopher Nolan) This was possibly the most anticipated release of the year, considering it was the king of the IMAX release crowd in its pre-release promotion. After a small delay due to COVID-19, it was one of the first films released in hopes of testing the movie-going waters during what was sure to be a diminished period of time, which probably hurt its numbers. Too many, the film was confusing, and the nit-picking was fierce from the criticism contingency, but in all honesty, this was pretty impressive Nolan fare... certainly a good second movie in a Nolan double feature.

The Trial of the Chicago 7 (dir. Aaron Sorkin) I cannot tell a lie... I was hugely impressed with how Sorkin managed to reel his personality and voice back in order to let this well-known, controversial moment in time present itself. Sorkin has a tendency to be the star of his films, be it when he is in the writer or director role, but for this film, he managed to focus the best parts of his skillset into a highly respectful, educational and inspiring tale that fit the tumultuous summer we endured.

VHYes (dir. Jack Henry Robbins) I remember seeing this trailer as 2019 was coming to a close, and it was a film high on my list of desired viewing. Then 2020 reared its ugly, stupid head and many releases disappeared into obscurity or found themselves delayed. Luckily, this one slipped through the cracks and found a home in the streaming world, which in all honesty, suited its presentation very well. One of the most delightfully weird films of the year, hands down.

Vivarium (dir. Lorcan Finnegan) Of all the films cut from my Top 15 list, this was the toughest cut to make. I went into the film totally blind (with Jesse Eisenberg and my respect for his acting chops being the sole selling point), but this film really hit a lot of my buttons... it’s trippy as can be, there is a character that is freakishly unique and wholly unnerving, and the production design leaves a lasting impression. Don’t let the Honorable Mention designation fool you... this one is a winner.

Wonder Woman 1984 (dir. Patty Jenkins) The Christmas gift that the masses collectively decided that they did not want. Much like Ava, there is one glaring aspect of this film that I could have done without, but otherwise, I found this to be an enjoyable film. Gal Gadot was made for this role, while Kristen Wiig and Pedro Pascal stepped up to the plate and impressed. If you’re looking to be blown away, the Wonder Woman franchise isn’t the smartest place to go, but if you’re looking for entertainment, there’s plenty of it here.

THE TOP 15 FILMS OF 2020

15. Mignonnes (dir. Maïmouna Doucouré) This one started off the year with plenty of controversy. What was an award-winning tale about womanhood and the difficulties surrounding coming of age in an ever-changing and evolving world quickly devolved into a campaign to ban the film (and Netflix). Many people overlooked the film as a cautionary tale about what access to the Internet and the sexually-charged nature in which women are portrayed can do to developing girls, instead choosing to accuse the film of being fodder for malicious types seeking to exploit the sexualizing of young women. More than anything, in my opinion, Mignonnes served as an example of our outrage-fueled culture and the way it tends to skew our perspective and/or our ability to take art at face value.

14. His House (dir. Remi Weekes) As I’ve mentioned many times over the past week or so on this blog, horror films were one of the few genres that found a benefit from the film industry’s transition to streaming services for primary access to film. While a number of traditional horror films received notice, His House took the opportunity to not only make a pure horror film, but one that spoke on racism and the conditions that asylum-seekers and refugees face. The film is well-acted, the production value is high quality, and it’s paced beautifully... while not the highest film on this list, it is certainly one I will encourage others to see as time goes by.

13. All Day and a Night (dir. Joe Robert Cole) When human nature reared its ugly head during COVID-19 in the form of numerous race-related killings, multitudes of businesses quickly adopted the Black Lives Matter mantra, with film distributors and streaming services taking advantage of the moment to produce and release content relevant to cultural and social awareness. Netflix was no different, and of the many films they released in the wake of the harrowing events, All Day and a Night is the one that feels the most sincere and honest in its approach and presentation. The streets of Oakland are presented with a vast array of characters, each with complex backgrounds and states of mind, all of which helps the viewer understand the pressure many minorities live with and process on a daily basis.

12. She Dies Tomorrow (dir. Amy Seimetz) Execution is king, even when applied to the simplest of premises, and She Dies Tomorrow is a shining example of this. In a very John Cassavetes move, director Amy Seimetz took her payment from her appearance in Pet Sematary and used it to fund a personal project that more than likely would have been ignored by studio heads. The result is a hypnotic, entrancing and haunting film where stillness and anticipation play antagonist, while we as viewers feel the need to transpose ourselves into the protagonists we are presented due to their stilted but emotional performances. Hopefully this one finds some notoriety in the cult classic realm as the years pass.

11. The Vast of Night (dir. Andrew Patterson) For a debut film, The Vast of Night handles itself with a surprising amount of confidence in its vision. The immersion is nearly instant as we are first placed in the premise of a TV show, and then a 1950′s town, but once the actors and camera get going, it’s up to us as viewers to strap in for the ride. The story is deeply intriguing, the performances are strong enough to carry a very dialogue heavy movie, and the final act is chilling in its reveals. I will be surprised if this one finds its way to a Best Original Screenplay nomination due to it being a debut film from a relatively unknown writer/director, but if it manages to get the nomination it will certainly be a well-deserved one.

10. Birds of Prey (and the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn) (dir. Cathy Yan) The movie that broke the list. If someone would have told me in 2019 that a film directly connected to Suicide Squad would be anywhere on a Top Films list I curated, I would have laughed dead in their face, and yet, here we are. It’s like every good idea that was poorly executed in Suicide Squad found new life in Birds of Prey, which makes the film not only an entertaining watch, but a satisfying one. Not only is Margot Robbie perfect in this film (as well as given a break on the exploitative costuming), but Mary Elizabeth Winstead arguably takes a stab at stealing the show with her performance. Don’t let the DCEU association fool you... Birds of Prey is the real deal.

9. Never Rarely Sometimes Always (dir. Eliza Hittman) Probably the most contemplative film on the entire list, and impressive in its nature for sure. To my knowledge, the cast is made up of mostly unknowns (unless I’m sleeping on actors and actresses, which has been known to happen), and as a result, a tough slice of life to swallow is presented in an extremely grounded nature. Sidney Flanigan gives a powerful performance, hopefully the first of many.

8. Possessor [Uncut] (dir. Brandon Cronenberg) Easily the most “what the f-ck” film on this list, and certainly one worthy of the Cronenberg name. Andrea Riseborough has been on my radar since Birdman or (The Unexpected Virtue of Ignorance) and Mandy, and seeing her in a lead role confirms her talent. I’m a sucker for science-fiction films that don’t rely on digital effects and elaborate set pieces, and Possessor rings both of those bells with a vengeance. I watched the uncut version, which has a couple of extremely brutal sequences that will unnerve even the most hardened viewer, but these sequences only serve to drive home the lost nature of Tasya, our protagonist. This one isn’t for everyone, but for those who can stomach a bit off graphicness and process a narrative that doesn’t spoon-feed you answers, this one is a must see.

7. Da 5 Bloods (dir. Spike Lee) Spike Lee has always been a huge influence on me as both an aspiring filmmaker and a fan of the medium, but I’d be lying if I told you that his last decade was a memorable one. Outside of BlacKkKlansman, Lee has found himself falling short of his vision more often than not, but Da 5 Bloods is a tonal and stylistic bullseye. Fans of Lee will dig it, fans of Vietnam films will dig it, and anyone who had an inkling of respect or admiration for Chadwick Boseman will be moved. If Lee continues to make films as good as this one, he may find an entirely new generation of fans as a result.

6. Soul (dir. Pete Docter) As mentioned at the top of this list, people love to try and sink films due to their own personal agendas, and Soul found itself in the crosshairs prior to its late 2020 release. Many people were upset that a minority character would not only spend most of the movie as a blue blob, but would also seemingly serve as a tool for another character’s “salvation”. That being said, once Soul dropped, anybody with common sense dropped those stances and realized that Pixar had not only made a stunningly beautiful film, but one that likely spoke to adults more than children. Plain and simple, Soul is a bonafide instant classic.

5. Kajillionaire (dir. Miranda July) If Evan Rachel Wood doesn’t win an Oscar for her performance in Kajillionaire (or at least garner a nomination), Hollywood needs to collectively have their head checked. Every year worth its salt has a weird, quirky but loveable film, and Miranda July more than succeeded in making one for 2020. The humor, both physical and dialogue-based, is on point, and the bittersweet nature of the story is gut-wrenching as the film progresses. This one was probably the biggest surprise for 2020 in terms of prior awareness versus post-watch admiration.

4. Ma Rainey’s Black Bottom (dir. George C. Wolfe) The final film of Chadwick Boseman’s short but prolific career is one that allowed him to exist in the wake of his reality, making his performance powerful and (seemingly) cathartic. He is surrounded by supreme talent on all sides, as there are no weak performances in this film, and despite it essentially being a play shot for film, it feels far from limited, contained or constrained. Not only does it speak on larger issues of the commodification of Black pain and talent, but it may serve as a vehicle for a posthumous Oscar for Boseman.

3. The Devil All The Time (dir. Antonio Campos) This was the first Netflix original that made me really and truly respect them as a film distributor. The list of talent for The Devil All The Time is truly impressive, and Tom Holland knocked his lead role out of the park. Robert Pattinson is great as always, and the way that the story winds back into itself keeps you locked in and connected until the credits roll. For something that came out so many months ago, it’s respectable that it was able to hold such a high position on a list that was as fluid as any I’ve ever put together.

2. Mank (dir. David Fincher) For a time, this was the hands down film of the year on my list. Gary Oldman has basically become a “can do no wrong” actor, and his performance was amplified by David Fincher’s ability to emulate the look, sound and feel of a bygone Hollywood era. On top of this, the built in intrigue that comes with handling anything remotely connected to Orson Welles is present, making Mank almost feel like a companion piece to the prolific film that is Citizen Kane. If The Devil All The Time was a victory for Netflix, then Mank was the win that put them into a true spot as contenders in the future of film distribution.

1. I'm Thinking of Ending Things (dir. Charlie Kaufman) Where does one even begin with Charlie Kaufman? Time and again, he proves to be one of the most truly unique voices to gain fame. For I’m Thinking of Ending Things, Kaufman seemingly returns to his foundation of odd, offbeat love stories, only to take us on a journey of truly mind-bending and psyche-warping proportions. Of all the movies on this list, this is the one that almost demands repeat viewings, as one must have an idea of the entire journey before they can understand the individual aspects laid out. If dialogue isn’t your thing, then this one may not hold you, but that would be a shame, as this beautiful mystery stands head and shoulders above the rest of 2020′s stellar output.

6 notes · View notes