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radiofreederry · 2 years

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US Presidents as Dril Tweets

George Washington: another day volunteering at the betsy ross museum. everyone keeps asking me if they can fuck the flag. buddy, they wont even let me fuck it

John Adams: "ah boo hoo hoo i want to post Foul comments to content leaders" Fat Chance, Dimwit. I will annihilate you under bulwark of the Law and God.

Thomas Jefferson: Q: If your post was proven by a counsil of wise men to be racist, or bullshit, would you bar it from the record? A: I do not delete my posts

James Madison: (sniffing a crumpled up one dollar bill i found on the floor of a dog kennel) ah.. thats greenbacks baby

James Monroe: for decades i have traversed the unforgiving mountains and rivers of south america, hoping to catch a glimpse of the fabled "ass downloader"

John Quincy Adams: "This Whole Thing Smacks Of Gender," i holler as i overturn my uncle's barbeque grill and turn the 4th of July into the 4th of Shit

Andrew Jackson: handing Faves over to my enemies is FRAUD !! base, contemptible FRAUD!

Martin Van Buren: Food $200

Data $150

Rent $800

Candles $3,600

Utility $150

someone who is good at the economy please help me budget this. my family is dying

William Henry Harrison: (spends all of 7 seconds skimming some blog posts) yep. just as i knew all along. having pnuamonia is good

John Tyler: fuck "jokes". everything i tweet is real. raw insight without the horse shit. no, i will NOT follow trolls. twitter dot com. i live for this

James K. Polk: thhere is no such thing as charisma, and art is fake. the only metrics by which we must determine the worth of a man are Strength and Wisdom

Zachary Taylor: the doctor reveals my blood pressure is 420 over 69. i hoot & holler outta the building while a bunch of losers tell me that im dying

Millard Fillmore: trying to heal..... please donate to my go fund me... $10 will make me less racist... $100 will make me extremely less racist...thank you...

Franklin Pierce: blocked. blocked. blocked. youre all blocked. none of you are free of sin

James Buchanan: #NationalGirlfriendDay please cherish your gal's.. in honor of us, the single Boys who must sacrifice all companionship to #CarryTheBrand...

Abraham Lincoln: unloading an entire belt of ammo at me with a minigun or some such device will now get you "Blocked"

Andrew Johnson: who the fuck is scraeming "LOG OFF" at my house. show yourself, coward. i will never log off

Ulysses S. Grant: i regret being tasked the emotional burden of maintaining the final bastion of morality and Nice manners in this endless ocean of human SHIT

Rutherford B. Hayes: using the toilet when i hear Our national anthem start to play. i do what i must. i stand tall in complete agony; as shit runs down my leg,

James A. Garfield: too much truth in such little time. feeling the heat cominh down to silence me... signing off........ for now

Chester A. Arthur: i WILL wise the fuck up. i WILL super charge my content for 2017. i WILL get blue check mark

Grover Cleveland: the way i see it, people who come on here and submit content that is not up to par, could possibly be considered the "Villains" of this site

Benjamin Harrison: i help every body, im not racist, i keep myself nice, and when i ask for a single re-tweet in return i am told to fuck off, fuck myself, etc

William McKinley: boy oh boy do i love purchasing large amounnts of Fool's Gold. wait a minute... fools gold fucking sucks. this stuff is no good..!! Fuck !!!

Theodore Roosevelt: IF THE ZOO BANS ME FOR HOLLERING AT THE ANIMALS I WILL FACE GOD AND WALK BACKWARDS INTO HELL

William H. Taft: ah.. the perfect Souffle! cant wait to dig in to t(*EVERY PIPE IN MY HOUSE EXPLODES AT THE SAME TIME, COVERING ME IN SHIT AND BOILING WATER*

Woodrow Wilson: the conflicted supersoldier stares over the horizon as he smokes a cigarette. "war is the most fucked up thing ever." he takes a sip of beer

Warren G. Harding: somebody please Bribe me

Calvin Coolidge: aggressively joyless oaf hhere. painfully obnoxious respect demander checkign in. extremely dim witted frowning man looking for pals

Herbert Hoover: it is really quite astonishing that I have yet to win The Lottery, given how good I am at selecting six numbers and saying them out loud

Franklin D. Roosevelt: ive never heard of this “europe” but it sounds like a big bunch of shit to me

Harry Truman: everybody wants to be the guy to write the tweet that solves racism once and for all because it would look good as hell on a resume

Dwight D. Eisenhower: my "F*&k It!! Let's Go Golfin" t-shirt maintains a tenacious stranglehold on my life. after 1,125 days of Golf my body is twisted, deformed

John F. Kennedy: when you do sutuff like... shoot my jaw clean off of my face with a sniper rifle, it mostly reflects poorly on your self

Lyndon B. Johnson: incredibly handsome , charismatic famous boy credited with ending income inequality after saying that slumlords should be called "dumblords"

Richard Nixon: i attribute the complete failure of my brand to the actions of detractors, oor my “trolls”, as it were, as well as my own constant fuckups

Gerald Ford: shutting computer down until the shitty moods & attitudes can fuck off., if you need me ill be on my other computer, sititng 60° to my right

Jimmy Carter: i warnned you all that bad things would happen if you kept letting your wives wear jeans. AND NOW LOOK! the damn gas prices are up again

Ronald Reagan: spend a lot of time thinking about how sometimes even war criminals can be heroes sometimes... Dont like it? Click the unfollow buttobn

George H.W. Bush: just thought off an idea i believe to be bad ass. lets find the address of the leader of isis, and mail him/ her pieces of our SHIT

Bill Clinton: were at the point now, that when i offer to impregnate my girl followers, people assume my motives are sexual. disgusting, grow the fuck up,

George W. Bush: friday night gathering up together a big pile of things i like to respect (flags, crucifixes ,etc) and just roll around in it ,give kisses,

Barack Obama: my IQ has increased 10 points ever since i stopped tollerating people mucking about, on the time line

Donald Trump: THERAPIST: your problem is, that youre perfect, and everyone is jealous of your good posts, and that makes you rightfully upset.

ME: I agree

Joe Biden: I will shut the fuck up , IF , it will restore the Harmony. I will get on my knees like a dog and make that sacrifice, for the sake of Calm

#the classic reborn #my post #long post #dril #history

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absolutely-normal-about-x · 21 days

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Volnutt explaining the Family tree to his friends is so fucking funny. Like I just know the look of their faces would be from extremely morbid confusion and horror. While volnutt does this Pepe Silvia thing by linking of the relationship possibly connected the wish’s and Cossack families. The reveal that Volnutt has a MASSIVE Family, filled with Uncles and Aunts in the form of the Robot masters and The light Sibling trio.

Some Dialog to accommodate it cause trash

Barret: Fuckin sparks Vol how far the tree even goes!? I mean how did you even know your relatives there!?

Volnutt: Well okay so…there’s this weird thing

thing that robots have in that era to be their identifiers like these numbers thing they have going on

Roll: So like IDs then? Kinda sounds like what Tron does with her Servbots, she gives them numbers to identify them.

Volnutt: Yeah! Something like that Dad said that ours is “DLN” standing…ummmm…Doctor Light Number.

Aero: “Doctor Light Number” that's a weird thing but makes sense since back in their Era. Back then Robots…didn’t have much freedom…especially the ones with sentience till Reploids where a thing

Barrett: Pretty messed up to begin with but hey it was wayyy before everything happened so can’t blame the humans tho.

Roll: Actually, I wonder if your dad has a number ID like the rest of the Robot Masters before becoming a carbon. Since he was the last creation of your grandfather.

Volnutt: Well…I did ask him but he went quiet…he just says that it doesn’t matter cause at the end of the day we’re still family so we don’t think about that much…plus we share the last name so I guess it makes sense. Plus it’s been thousands of years so it doesn’t make sense for him and us to have our Numbers.

Barret: Like Volnutt don’t wanna sound over dramatic, but your family is low key wild. Especially your old man cause by the sounds of it he’s REALLY OLD LIKE EVEN OLDER THAN OUR POPS! I mean learning history is great and all but doesn’t that mess you up considering how far back that lineage dates back? How do you think your Dad feels about this? Sheesh talk about the worlds oldest fossil-

Aero whacks Barrett upside the head: Hey! It’s rude to say that to Volty you Тупица! Our Папа is also just as old as him! And Uncle Zero too!

Barrett: Hey! Hey! Ow!! I know I know but Uncle X and Z is older than him ya know!!

Roll: It’s still rude!!

Volnutt: It’s fine guys, I mean it’s pretty overwhelming genuinely it’s okay! I get to learn so much and the Guardians always learn this stuff too. The stories and history lessons are pretty fun plus Dad doesn’t seem to mind it…kinda wonder if he misses them now that no one remembers them. But it’s our job to honor them at least! Plus Roll we do share the same name as Uncle Rock and Auntie Roll! So that means something!!

Roll: Yeah it’s probably a coincidence but still it means something!! We’ll make them proud for sure!

Volnutt: Yeah!!

(They high five each other)

Barrett chuckles: Dorks ya gotta love them

Aero: Yeah…Значит, мы не рассказываем им о том, как твой отец убил свою приемную семью, верно?

Barrett: Абсолютно

Volnutt and Roll: What are you guys saying?

Barrett and Aero: Nothing!

#megaman x #megaman legends #legends reborn #megaman classic #megaman volnutt #roll caskett #Barrett #Aero #I’m trashy I know but-#I want to at least write the dynamic of the kids at least #I may not be god but I try my best anyways-

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