#the answer is i have Many Feelings evidently

[brucewaynehater101]

Okay okay, so Tim finds out Bruce is stuck in the timestream and gathers all his siblings + Barbara for a meeting, presenting his evidence, a drafted plan of action to save Bruce . . .

. . . And asks what to do with this information

They all come to an agreement / majority vote

l e t h i m d i e

=========

Once upon a time they thought that Gotham, the world, that they, all needed Batman

Now that isn't the case anymore

Oh he was mourned, by the Justice League, by his allies, by civilians . . .

But the Batfamily has grown into their own, they've found a way to fight for Gotham, Bludhaven, Crime Alley because they've inherited the Fear of Batman

They've found their own ways to instill the fear of them into the criminal world

Their territories are becoming better even despite their Patriarch being dead

And they feel less dead than they were becoming under his thumb

The Dark Knight is Dead; Long Live The Dark Knights

· · ·

People questioned what would happen with the Prince of Gotham dead

Tim tried becoming CEO, but Jason stepped in himself to take the mantle from right under him, citing he was too young and should enjoy his childhood while it still lasted

That started quite a fight between them

Duke Thomas was adopted by Jason and while not technically joining the family's nightlife, Signal could always be found while the sun was up

Gotham's bones broke, organs failed, and flesh was bitten off

Gotham has never been better since Batman or even The Second Robin died

Praise the Batfamily

This is happiness . . .

?

=========

Somebody finds out they let Batman die

Be it the Justice League, other heroes, their rogues, or another hero's rogues, or somebody else entirely

They find out

Do other groups learn by themselves? Does this knowledge come into the hands of people who would spread it?

Either way, the Batclan is going to have to confront that it's known they let Batman die

Is the knowledge it used maliciously, is the accuser wanting answers, or is it a mix of both

Gosh, what will Alfred think if he learns? I imagine that even if he enabled Bruce's abuse they kept him around, stick close enemies and friends after all

(me thinks personally that Joker is throwing a fit with his nemesis dead, and he may not even be able to abuse the fact his own kids killed him cuz it was a child abuser who was killed by his abused)

(but I'd love to see your take on Joker's pov when he only knows Batman is dead and if he learns his kids left him for dead and if he learns they were abused by him and that's why they let him die)

Now I'm wondering what would happen if it got leaked to the public that the Batfamily knew Batman could've been saved but did nothing about it. There could be so many different reactions from different groups

Crime Alley people, criminals, people outside Gotham, Gothamites themselves, and Bludhaven residents would have different takes collectively methinks

Fucking hell, that isn't even accounting for all the fuckery you could do w/ Bruce Wayne = Batman and I'm not talking about an post-mortem identity reveal, I'm talking identity shenanigans

Like say the bats knowing they could have saved Bruce but left him for dead and somebody/some group learns this and leaks it

And then Jason steps in to say "you know the FUCK what? We knew our old man could have been saved and since he was shit we voted/agreed to let him die!!" And all hell breaks loose

And that's just one example!

=========

Inspired by that ask on Jason calling for a family meeting after learning Bruce is stuck in the timestream to figure out what to do from there

+ the one post where Dick tries and fails to get Tim to give up on Bruce so he doesn't embark on BruceQuest and Bruce dies in the Timestream

w/ Cassandra in particular, it'd be fun to explore her psyche in the Vote branch, if she votes to let Bruce die or not considering her "No Kill" stance

Heck, with both branches they alone bring so much fun to the table, even without the flavor of The Reveal

Agreement: You get the explore a world where all the bat kids + Barbara want Bruce dead, by why is it? You get to see all their reasons for it, and how their reasonings may mesh or clash and how they come to make their decisions!

Majority Vote: You get to see the conflicts between those who want him back and want him dead + what they do and think knowing who voted for what then onwards

Bonus if a batsibling or two start of wanting Bruce back but then decide they want him gone, or the reverse, or they flip flop again and again until they make their choice

Either branch I think would overhaul the Batfamily's relationships w/ each other in a major way and not just because someone has to take Bruce's spot as the family head or whatever, but because they chose/voted for said Patriarch to die

That's a big fucking deal

Oh yeah, Duke; is he ever taught about the (technically not) Patricide committed? Or do they keep him ignorant because ignorance is bliss?

Because if he learns through means other than them, yeah it'll be a shit show the Bats won't be prepared for beforehand

Oh yeah what about Gordon? Do you think he'd be in the know or learn via leaks or a leaker cuz he's kind of Barbara's family

Hello!!!!!!!!!!

Tw: abuse, death, murder, child abuse, suicide (let me know if I need to add more)

I love this idea, and I'm totally up for breaking it down.

If it's not an agreement, then it's likely that the ones who disagree will try to save Bruce regardless of what everyone else wants

This will turn into an all-out war as those who want Bruce dead try to prevent the others from succeeding. It would be like a weird version of capture the flag, clue, and escape the room. The save-Bruce team (whether out of love or duty) would need to gather all the evidence that Tim did while fending off attacks and working against the clock (there comes a point in time that it's too late to save Bruce).

Even if they all agree, it's still complicated feelings wise.

Bruce is an abusive piece of shit (especially in this AU), but it's hard to not love your abuser. The cycle of abuse is difficult to break out of. I think Dick and Jason would be at the point they are more apathetic to Bruce's care/love. They are adults who don't rely on him. They might still love Bruce, but it's easier for them to put a defense against the man emotionally to the point of condoning his murder.

Babs and Steph aren't his kids, so, while their feelings aren't black and white, it's easier to distance themselves from Bruce.

Canonically, I think Tim recently got adopted by Bruce. This makes it harder for him to outright reject Bruce. When given evidence (and shown what Bruce did to his other family members), Tim might come to the conclusion that it's better off without Bruce.

Damian is a child who just got to meet his dad. I doubt he'd be on board with this plan nor, with his hero worship, would he be able to find faults in him. He simply hasn't spent enough time with Bruce (and lots of angst to be explored there. Basically, his "siblings" that he's just met are telling him it's better for him if their dad is dead).

Cass loves Bruce. She trusts his mission, what he's supposed to stand for, and that he does love his kids (she can see that he truly does love everyone). At the same time, he hurts her siblings. She doesn't agree with leaving Bruce to die, but her feelings are complicated on the matter.

How the batkids feel about Alfred is similar (although not categorically per a kid) as they feel about Bruce

If they've reached the point where they have acknowledged that Alfred will never be on their side nor protect them, they still love that old man. They want him to be around, they would be sad at his death, but they know Alfred could and has hurt them. They know Alfred would choose Bruce over them.

The JL find out Bruce isn't actually dead with the Black Lantern battle thing.

Theoretically, other heroes can then start trying to save Bruce. Without canon Tim's information, though, they might not be able to. Bonus points to this batfam au if Oracle and others actively sabotage their efforts.

Gordon would be presented with all the evidence that Batman was an abusive piece of shit.

The Commissioner would try to bury any feelings of grief out of guilt for what he's unknowingly allowed his ex friend to get away with. If he knew that Batman was the same boy he threw a jacket over at the scene of that kid's parents' murder, he would sit at his desk with a bottle of scotch and a lit cigarette trying to figure out where it all went wrong. Jim would blame himself, curse Batman, and, as he curses himself for always allowing, do not a damn thing against what the masked vigilantes tell him to do.

Crime Alley and Bludhaven respectively probably would either not give a fuck, say "good riddance," or whistle at the fact the Bat's own kids refused to save him.

Gothamites know their vigilantes. If the batkids had refused to help Batman, than they trust the kids. There's nothing out there that would turn a man's entire family against him besides the man himself. By the end of the week, all Batman related stuff is burnt and replaced by the many symbols of the birds.

Anyone outside of Gotham (besides Bludhaven) will criticize the batkids. Gotham becomes fiercely protective over their birds after that and will fist fight anyone who tries to talk shit about them or their decision.

Fuck Joker, but here's how I think he felt about it.

Man definitely lost his shit in a fit of giggles. It seems (though Joker is slightly disappointed he wasn't part of the final showdown) that Batman was dragged down to the level of madness he swore he'd never go to. If Batman's kids turned against him, oh that must mean that the furry freak truly did horrendous actions against them!

That clown spends several weeks coming up with twisted fantasies and theories to ask out of the Birds to tease out their reactions for when he next sees them. He wants to know exactly how the Dark Knight fell and what was so dastardly to turn children against their father.

After he solves that mystery? Dealer's choice. He doesn't quite get as much joy without Batman around. He can play around with Red Hood and Red Robin specifically (if JJ happened), but nobody is the Dark Knight.

Maybe his melancholy turns into rage where he starts seriously gunning for all the Birds for not returning Batman to him. That, or Joker kills himself cause his nemesis/obsession is gone. Both are likely responses.

Anyways, I also love the positive notes you had that I didn't address. The hopefulness of them doing better for Gotham and Jason adopting Duke is fantastic. I'd love more of that as well as everything else

#dc comics #dc universe #thank you for the ask!!!! #bruce wayne #bruce wayne bashing #dc au

[tinydefector]

SEEKER TRINE VENTS

The Seeker trine x human (separate)

Word count: 2.6k

Warnings: swearing, injury

_____________

Based on this photo

Starscream 

Small noises of displeasure fell from their lips as they scrub grime off of Starscream, the mech had been rather vocal about how much he hated earth and the muck that would get itself stuck in his vents, ledges and creases of his armour.

 "How do you get so much stuff wedged in here?" They ask in annoyance. Starscream vented heavily as they scrubbed at his plating, not bothering to conceal his distaste for the task. As one such pesky piece of debris came loose, he huffed derisively.  

"You organic creatures are so primitive, dragging all manner of filth into our ship. Your flimsy exteriors offer no protection from this planet's foul substances." 

The human scowled up at him, unamused by his answer. He continued more dourly, "The intricate grooves and seams of Cybertronian plating are evidently well-suited for trapping debris, as I've discovered to my irritation. “Your "muck", as you call it, works its way deep within joints and transformation seams, which it then proves vexing to dislodge." His brow ridge drew down in a scowl.

He remained still while the human tended to him, but he dared not harm them and risk angering Megatron. For now, he bit back any further complaints.

"Oh yes, the primitive who somehow can keep themself cleaner than you. Stop being such a pissbaby " They shoot back as they scrub the soapy water across his wings.

 "You'd think highly advanced Cybernetic aliens would have a way to deal with this" they tease. The soapy sponge scrubbing against the insignia.

Starscream scoffed haughtily at the human's insolence.

 "And yet here you are, assigned the menial task of removing such filth from my plating." He vented in irritation as the sponge scrubbed over a particularly caked-on patch of grime, the insignia proudly displayed upon his wings now slowly becoming visible once more. 

"Make no mistake, human, had I been leader of the Decepticons we would not be on this wretched planet to begin with." His plating gave an involuntary shiver as a transformation seam was ruthlessly scoured.

If Starscream had been bipedal at that moment he would be looking down at them with a fixed and pointed glare. "Now cease your prattling and get on with the task, unless you wish to spend the remainder of the day at it!" he Snarled, he felt humiliated having someone else clean him, but some of The areas he just couldn't reach himself.   

"Mimimi" they make the whiny little nose at Starscream as they use his wing to drop down onto the floor as they begin checking the underside of his wing, scrubbing more groves. Starscream's wings twitched in irritation as the human scampered down to scrub at his undercarriage. 

 before they move towards the Jets vents. "Fucking hell you have that many leaves wedged in here!." They state. "Be careful! many of those plates are far more sensitive than exterior armour." He snarled sharply as they crawled up into the vent grabbing leaves and debris slowly dislodging them from hidden seams and vents.

 "Seeker frames such as mine offer countless nooks and crannies for debris to work itself deep within." A particularly stubborn clump came free, causing his vents to shudder involuntarily. They roll their eyes at him. "You can just say thank you, no need to be a prick Stars" their voice somewhat echoes and reverberates off his plating as they grab even more handfuls of leaves, throwing them out while they begin scrubbing the more sensitive plating.

Starscream shutters as his voice hitched as the human's hands scraped roughly against his more delicate vent internals. "Mind your hands, I'm not your toy!" he snapped, wings twitching in irritation. "Do not manhandle so crudely.” He cries out before going quietly, he feels defiled. 

Despite his complaints, he had to admit some relief as handfuls of debris were cleared away. "Can you not work quicker?" he groused. "Your primitive fingers pale in comparison to a proper Cybertronian sanitation cycle. And lingering here invites further filth and dirt with every moment." His plating flared, venting a burst of hot air to dislodge any remaining flecks. It puffs a collection of dust and dirt at the human who begins coughing and cursing him out. “ fuck you Starscream, trying to kill me!” After they finish having a choking fit they shoot him a glare. 

"Oh I'm so sorry that you can't clean your own vents" they remark in a snarky tone the soapy water seeps in and begins dislodging the other dirt and grim. Their eyes linger realising that his vents were much more spacious than they had expected. They scoot further in. They run their hand across a large 'scar' that is on the inside of the vent, fingers ever soft again the large grove. "Who did this to you?" They ask softly, their anger from before fading almost non existent. Starscream vented sharply as their hand lingers over an old wound. 

"A battlefield skirmish on Cybertron, an Autobot believed shoving a blade into my vent would end me " he replied tersely. "Such scars often remain, embedded in our armour's self-regenerating molecular structure. They serve as reminders of battles won and lost." 

His voice hitched as delicate sensor nodes were brushed. "Remove your hands, you have completed your task," Starscream stated curtly. While thorough cleansing was necessary to dislodge filth, he had limits to how much manhandling by fleshy human digits he would tolerate. 

 His plating rippled in a not so subtle threat, but he never let anyone touch his scars. The sooner this indignity was over, the better. They let out a soft huff and slowly slide themselves back out of the vents, moving towards the other buckets of water. Grabbing it and throwing the icy cold water across the soapy areas.

Starscream gasped sharply as the human doused him with the frigid rinse water, his armour plating clamping down tightly in response to the uncomfortable temperature differential. 

"Primus, have you no care for My paint?!" he snapped irritably. "That was Cold!” He cries out again. Nonetheless, it washed away the remaining suds caught in seams and joints. His plating gave a few experimental flutters to normalise to the temperature. 

That let out a laugh as they fill the bucket from the water punnet and proceeding with the next wing. "It's not my fault the water is so cold, don't you like a little cold water?" They call out teasing him again as they rinse the soap and grime off of starscream, even flushing out his vents to make sure they were clean.

Starscream flinched as frigid rinse water splashed over his plating once more, droplets seeping into seams and joints. "Primus, have mercy. Must you freeze my circuits,?!" he Shout irritably. "How anyone stands your planet's wretched temperatures is beyond me” 

He snapped his intake shut tightly, vents expelling a sharp burst of hot air to fully purge any remaining moisture. Though loath to rely on such crude organic methods, Starscream's newly cleaned plating shone as triumphant as ever. The human had proven. sufficient, if barely, for their demeaning chore. 

They squeal as Starscream transforms, grabbing them and lifting them up optic level. They laugh more, and for once Starscream finds it almost delightful how their voice echoes of the different frequencies. Even if they were a pest at the best of times. "Well look at you, all freshened up you don't look half bad." They state proudly.

"Your a pest," he conceded grudgingly. His optics flickered, scanning the organic clutched close. Gingerly, Starscream lowered them back to the ground. "It seems your crude manual methods have...sufficed, Now run along." His engine rumbled, a not-so-subtle dismissal. But for once, no sting of wrath laced the Seeker's words. "begone, before your nasty touch soils me further." His grumbled with an audible click. 

Skywarp 

Skywarp felt the human shudder against his frame. He vented softly, knowing he lacked the energy reserves to maintain his internal heating to run the heater in the cockpit for long in this condition. After being shot down, they had barely managed to make it to this cave and he could feel his systems needing to shut down to conserve power to heal.   

"Easy little one, try to stay awake. My self-repairs are attempting to reroute what power I can, but it may not be enough to keep you warm." His plating rattled shakily as tried to patch what gaps they could. A fall of temperatures that would do little to him but could snuff out their fragile form or make them sick. "Remain still and try to breathe slowly. I've tried contacting the others, but the rock is interfering with transmissions."

They pull their jackets closer. "How's the damage?" They ask through a shaky voice. Their breath is visible in the air but they still so more worry for him than their own situation. 

Skywarp ran another self-diagnostic scan. The damage was severe. his systems were barely functioning above stasis lock but he was fighting against it, for their sake. 

"My systems are heavily damaged from the crash and stasis is trying to set in," he said as evenly as possible his voice is static-laced and shaking. "But my self-repair functions are attempting to stabilise the worst systems so I can last until help comes. If the Autobots don't find us first" 

He focused what remaining power he had into his communications beacon, hoping his location ping would finally break through the rocky interference.

Skywarp knew they were likely frightened, putting on a brave face for him due to how injured he was. being trapped in a dark cave with a half-disabled mech wasn't what either of them had planned on their night flight . But he had to keep them alive and try not to panic himself. For now, all he could offer was what protection and warmth his tired frame could provide. 

" I may have a plan to keep you warm," he said gently. "My vents are internally heated and large enough that you could climb inside. Being so close to my engine and spark should keep you warm. It is not an ideal situation, but may better allow me to shield you with what power I have left and even in stasis it will keep you warm." 

"Ok" they state softly as they slowly move carefully climbing up into the vent. As they move back further into the vent they lay down against the warm metal letting out a sigh of relief. The sound of the heavy rain outside makes them peak their head back out just enough to watch it. 

"Thank you" they call out, eyes slowly fluttering closed as they bask in the heat that radiates off Skywarp. He emitted a soft rumble in acknowledgement. As they settle back further inside against his internal metal walls, he vents a sigh of relief. 

"You are most welcome, little one," Skywarp replied gently. "How do you feel?" he asked. “tried, I'm just glad you're alright, try and recover. I'm warm here, you won't be losing me tonight” they state bravely. 

 Skywarp did his best to calm his systems. "Try to rest if you are able." His systems begin shutting down into recharge. The sound of heavy rain echo's into the cave. 

when they wake up they are wrapped in multiple blankets held close to skywarps chassis, As the Seeker recharges. As memory of the cave ordeal was still fuzzy, confusion gave way to relief as warmth and safety registered. Beneath the layers of thermal blankets, nestled securely against Skywarp's recharging chest plates. His steady spark pulse and low internal hum soothed any remaining unease.  

Reaching out tentatively, they trailed gentle fingers across his armoured plating, Drawing nearer to his spark's glow, they let out a sigh of contentment and relief as they snuggled closer to him. 

Thundercracker 

 the small human wanders around his form checking for any damage from the Scraplet which had gotten into his vent. Small hands slowly weld the damage closed so that his systems could finish the job of mending.

 “Thank you for your assistance, Starscream has me on tight patrols lately, as you've noticed."  He waits patiently for them to finish, not wanting to jostle them as they work. "They don't know I'm here do they?" They asked softly, they knew Thundercracker had a soft spot for them, but they also hoped the con wasn't going against orders just for their company.

Thundercracker pauses  "No, they don't know. I try to visit when I can get away without them noticing." 

"Starscream has been keeping me flying patrol nearly nonstop lately, so it's been harder to slip away. But I couldn't leave without checking on you." He starts "Just a few more checks, don't want you trying to take off if you're still hurt or if there's another scraplet in your vents " they state while moving towards the large jet vents. Peeking inside. "It looks like you got more than you bargained for" they remark as they try to reach for the piece of shrapnel inside the vent. They grumble before climbing up into the vent, to try and remove the metal.

Thundercracker lets out a soft chuckle as the human climbs into his vents to remove the small chuckles of what was left of the dead creature. He remains as still as possible so as not to endanger them.  

"Indeed, that scraplet got the drop on me during my last patrol. Barely managed to get it out of my vent before it did any critical damage to my fans and engine. Thank you for your help removing it, my servos are far too large to fit in there. Just please be careful, I'd never forgive myself if you got hurt."

 

A laugh echoes from them inside the vent, "fuck they did a number on you" they call out as the dislodging more metal and throw the peices out of the vent. Thundercracker lets out a soft chuckle at the human's crass language, not bothered in the slightest.  "Indeed they did, the fragging scraplets really know how to leave a mess behind."

 They turn their torch on checking the rest of the vent. Crawling through it into a small gap before through into the other side. "What would you do without me?" They tease while making sure there isn't any other damage or scraplets hiding waiting to cause more damage. "As for what I'd do without you, I'd likely be running far less efficiently with pieces of shrapnel still lodged in my vents."  

He says in a gently teasing tone.  "Between you and my self-repair systems, I'll be as good as new before long. Almost feels like getting a tune up from my old mechanic back on Cybertron. Thank you for your help" 

"Anytime Thunder, I've got to keep my favourite jet in working order " they hum while climbing their way back out of the vent. They lean up and press a soft kiss to the side of metal.

 "Perhaps someday, I could return the favour and aid you in your repairs."

 Thundercracker hums softly in response, feeling a warmth in his spark at the gesture of affection from them. “oh Thundercracker you sweetheart but I'd leave medical stuff to the medics” the tease which makes him chuckle as he transforms. 

 They slowly begin wiping their hands off as they watch the Seeker. "You best get going before the others come looking and find that you have been keeping pets" they tease. Thundercracker smiles softly in amusement at the human's teasing words.  "Indeed, it would not do for Megatron or Starscream to discover I've been keeping a human 'pet'. Primus only knows what those two would do." He leans down and presses a soft kiss to their forehead. “Stay out of trouble my little mechanic” he mumbles to them. 

__________________

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[claymoresword]

Fatal Attraction | Pt.2

Lagertha Lothbrok x Farmer Fem!Reader

Summary: After a long day of working on your farm, you have an accidental encounter with a gorgeous shield-maiden.

Pairing: Lagertha x Reader

Wordcount: 1.9k

Warnings: fluff, smut, cunnilingus, g!p reader, soulmate elements, in my mind lagertha & y/n live happily ever after

Note: hi, so this is a continuation from the other Lagertha one shot i did with the same title :D before anyone asks, no this won't be a series lmaoo i don't have the time or willpower to commit to one right now but trust there will be more Lagertha stories whenever i get the inspiration.

hope u enjoy!

Once you've laced up your breeches properly, you swiftly extend a hand, assisting Lagertha as she gets to her feet.

Quietly observing as she retrieves her own sword off the ground, the shield-maiden courteously reaches for your ax as well.

“Thank you.” You mutter, unable to wipe the evident smirk off your face. Lagertha rolls her eyes in a playful fashion, fastening her sword belt, whilst you do the same.

You soon take Lagertha's hand in your own, guiding her through the dense forest, towards your farmhouse. “Come, this way.”

It is nearly nightfall now so you had to move quickly, else risk being stranded till morning.

A period of comfortable silence as you walk side by side before Lagertha addresses you.

“Can I ask you something– before we get to your house?”

You nod, pushing past more undergrowth and brush. “You can ask me anything.”

“How old are you?” Lagertha inquires, her eyes fixed upon your face, as if eager for a response; anxious to dismantle you.

“Two and twenty.” You reply after a beat.

You manage to catch the way the older woman's brows furrow for an instant, before her expression sets impassively once more.

“How old are you?” You nudge her with a shoulder.

The distant noise of streaming water is all you hear before the other woman finally responds.

“Older.” Lagertha says simply, this time it is your turn to roll your eyes.

You scoff.

“I gathered that, but how much older?” You attempt, and once more the shield-maiden is opposed to answering.

“I am asking the questions.” She asserts, gesturing to herself.

You bite your bottom lip to conceal your amusement, holding your arms up in mock surrender. “My apologies, go on.”

“How many siblings do you have?” She asks, glancing at the riverbank as you come upon it.

“None. It was only me and my mother.. but she is gone now.” You admit, Lagertha accepts your hand as you ascend the bridge.

You cross the river in silence, but you can sense her stare. Intrigue and pity.

“I am sorry, the wound of losing a parent never truly heals.” Lagertha finally states, and you can only grace her with a nod, hoping to move away from the topic of your mother.

“How long have you been operating your farm alone?” Another question, you can feel your shoulders relax– merely thankful for the diversion.

“Five, almost six years now.” You have no issues replying with the truth once more, you relish the way Lagertha clasps your hand slightly tighter.

You anticipate her next words, willing to answer any question Lagertha might have, all night if necessary. Especially if it meant remaining in her company.

“Have you ever thought of getting married?” Her words prompt a smirk, you steal a swift glance at the older woman before responding.

“I have thought of it.. I suppose I have yet to meet a woman I would want to spend my life with.” You say, looking at her again.

Lagertha's brows furrowed once more, and you quickly realize that she does that because she is thinking. The sight makes your heart pound harder in your chest– she is truly the most enticing woman you have ever met.

“And what would you consider a woman you would spend your life with? What do you desire in a wife?” The shield maiden inquires, as her expectant gaze meets your own, you are tempted to pull her close and kiss her once more.

“Oh, that is easy to answer.” You remark as an idea occurred to you.

Tugging on Lagertha’s arm, you guide her to the body of water before pointing to it.

“You need only use your eyes.” With little light left in the sky, the river is dark, but her reflection is visible enough.

You watch it ripple as you both stare. The older woman is quiet for a while, though you swear she is fighting a smile.

“I don't think a fish would make a reliable companion.” Lagertha finally jests, brushing past you, her hand slips out of your grasp.

You can't help the involuntary laugh that erupts from your chest as Lagertha turns back to you with a grin. She waits for you to catch up and continue your journey back to your farmhouse.

“You are funny.” You compliment, and the older woman simply hums in acknowledgement.

“And you have a very smooth tongue.” Lagertha notes, now that you are practically beaming.

You don't fight the urge to reach for her hand once more; a sense of triumph as you feel the shield-maiden entwine your fingers in a more intimate manner.

“Just wait till you see what else I can do with my tongue.”

═══════════════════════════════════════════

You reach the farmhouse just as the sky has fully darkened, now the world is quiet, apart from the distant noise of crickets in the nearby forest. Even then, the sounds come few and far between. The insects must be hiding out to escape the cold– something you both should also do.

“After you, my lady.” You gesture into your home after pushing the door open.

Lagertha chuckles at your mock gallantry, she has her arms wrapped around herself for warmth as she steps through. “Thank you.”

You observed as the shield-maiden immediately began wandering around the inside of your home, taking in her surroundings. You let out a quiet sigh at the realization that you've left the space tidy enough, initially not expecting any company.

-

Routinely, you fetch a pile of firewood, making your way over to the hearth.

Lagertha's tentative stare is accompanied by a wild fluttering in your belly. She watches you feed the fire as if it was the most fascinating sight in the world– you had to bite back a grin.

“Do you really live alone?” The older woman asks again, and your expression contorts incredulously for a moment.

Why is that so difficult for her to believe?

“Yes, it is just me.” You respond in earnest as you move from a squatting position to approach her.

You hold her eye contact as you stand only an inch or two away. The shield maiden is first to avert her gaze– somehow she is even more gorgeous now, with light from the firepit dancing on her skin.

“Can I ask you another thing?” Lagertha's brows are knitted together once more. Now it is a familiar sight to you, you allow yourself to smile as you reach out to caress her cheek.

“What is it, beautiful?” You coax.

You desperately want to feel her lips against your own, though you decide to wait patiently for her next words.

“Do you believe that sometimes two people are meant to cross paths, for better or worse?” Lagertha inquires, and your expression grows almost mirthful as you quickly understand her meaning.

“Yes, I do believe that.” You ensure, shifting even closer, your gaze flits down to her mouth for an instance.

To your delight, Lagertha is first to eliminate all space between you– practically crashing her lips against your own, your tongue slips in her mouth, allowing you to taste her as you swallow her whimper. The shield-maiden's hand swiftly gets lost in your hair.

Lagertha gasps as your lips part, as if it pained her to separate. Although she maintains a firm hand against your chest, forcibly keeping you at a distance so she may speak.

“I do not understand it but– it feels like I am supposed to be here with you.” She breathes and you nod in agreement it feels as though you had been waiting for her all your life.

“Yes, I feel the same.” You admit, kissing her again, hard and eager until she moaned.

*

You feel your cock quickly stirring within your wool breeches, you want her again, you need her.

Lagertha seemingly shares that sentiment as she swiftly unclasps your ax belt before slipping her hand underneath the hem of your tunic, lifting it over your head to leave you in your smallclothes.

You repeat the same with her garments, and soon enough she stands before you bare, flushed and vulnerable.

“You are breathtaking.” You praise as your open mouth finds her neck. Lagertha is already panting by the time your hand cups her breast, she can only moan at the contact, guiding you closer to your bed.

You watched as the shield-maiden climbed onto your bed, unreservedly, as if it was her own. In truth, she looked as though she really did belong here, in your home.

You can hardly fathom a time when she wasn't in it.

“Come here.” Lagertha coaxes after she catches you staring, her legs parting willingly as you settle yourself on top of her.

Your clothed groin makes contact with her swollen, wet heat as you kiss. She immediately wraps her legs around your waist, seeking more friction.

Her arousal begins to leave a wet patch on your breeches, and the feel of it makes you groan.

She is utterly intoxicating.

“Fuck–” You grunt into her mouth, you needed to feel her and taste her, properly.

Lagertha’s grip on the nape of your neck tightens as you pull away, but the feel of your warm tongue on her breasts causes an involuntary shiver to run through her body.

She is weakened at the mere feeling of your mouth on her flesh, and it makes you giddy with want.

The older woman gasps once more as you deliberately nip at the skin just above her belly button, before smoothing over it with your tongue.

Lagertha trembles anew.

“Please..” Her voice is meek and desperate. What she is pleading for is unclear, although her insistent hand guiding your head further down her body gives you a clearer idea of her desires.

You decide not to deprive either of you a moment longer. Propping her thigh up slightly, at last your mouth makes contact with her weeping sex, ripping a wanton moan out of the older woman.

Her fingers tighten in your hair as you begin to run your tongue through her folds, sucking and licking with little reverence.

“Y/n– oh, Gods–” You proceed to coax a slew of incoherent muttering and groans from Lagertha as you continue to pleasure her with your mouth. Determined to make her feel the best she has ever felt.

The volume of her moans would suggest that you are succeeding.

You begin sucking on her already sensitive clit, and soon the shield-maiden arches her back, grinding her cunt against your mouth.

You decide to present her your tongue once more, this time dipping it inside of her entrance, and this is all it takes for Lagertha to come undone.

She screams out in ecstasy, her hand has fallen away from your hair to grip the sheets next to her, as the violent orgasm rips through her body.

You pull back, moaning at the taste of her on your lips. You kiss a gentle path up her still writhing frame until your face is once more, hovering over hers.

Lagertha's eyes are visibly glazed over from pleasure and arousal. She lets out a breathless chuckle as she looks up at you, wiping your mouth clean.

You kissed her palm then, and she hastily drew you close in response. Her chest is still heaving as her mouth meets your own, heavy and passionate.

As your lips eventually separate, you open your mouth to speak, but the words swiftly die in your throat.

Lagertha's hand begins to travel further down, she expertly locates your hardened bulge.

The older woman squeezes your cock through your breeches, and now all you can manage is a grunt. She beams at your reaction, leaving a contrastingly innocent kiss on your cheek before pulling her hand away and propping herself up on her elbows.

“Lay back.” Lagertha commands.

#lagertha lothbrok x reader #lagertha x reader #lagertha imagine #lagertha lothbrok smut #g!p #g!p reader #smut

[imakemywings]

A Silent Echo

Fandom: The Silmarillion

Characters: Fingolfin, Fingon

Summary: Hithlum reckons with the departure of the future Gondolindrim.

Length: 4.8k

AN: It's not really related, but I wanted to credit this art by Ylieke for getting me thinking about my many Fingolfin feelings again.

AO3 | Pillowfort | SWG

In the last few weeks under the gentle warmth of the spring sun, Fingolfin had done his due diligence. He had reviewed the manifests back as far as a decade. He had spoken to everyone who might have even an inkling of a hint of a clue, particularly those whose families had been split up. He had sent out scouts, and gone tracking himself in search of a reliable trail, and set Lalwen on the hunt. And with all his investigation, he returned again and again to the same conclusion: Aredhel and Turgon had planned this.

All over the sudden and stunning disappearance of two of his remaining three children and nearly a third of the population of Hithlum, Noldor and Sindar alike, were the fingerprints of Turgon’s meticulous mind. Not only had he planned it, Fingolfin felt grimly sure, but it had been years in the making. The evidence was there: the way Turgon had insinuated himself into the business of managing their supplies, the way he had been quietly but steadily obtaining approvals to move those who had gone with him to the further outskirts of their territory so they might eventually vanish more noiselessly, the connections he had been making among the lords—for indeed, several lords had gone with him, including Lord Ecthelion and Lord Egalmoth.

Not only had the process taken years in itself, but likely had been years in the planning before even the first of Turgon’s moves to start consolidating people and materials, which meant that it might have been over two decades his children had been planning to abscond in the night without so much as a whisper.

Beyond the windows that stood above Fingolfin’s desk, a light rain pattered, and Fingolfin’s mouth twitched in something too rictus to be called a smile. Turgon had done his work well—he was no Fëanor, but he must have made a remarkably convincing case.

While the conclusion was, in one sense, reassuring—whatever had happened after their departure, they had not been snatched from their beds by orcs of Morgoth—it was also what most troubled Fingolfin personally, bringing his mind back and back and back again to a single question: Why hadn’t they told him?

What was it that was so urgent, so momentous, so delicate that it had to be kept secret even from family?

Aredhel and Turgon had always been especially close. Fingolfin and Anairë had worried he would be sour about no longer being the youngest of their immediate family, but it was not so. He had received her kindly, and once she began to plump up and walk and babble, he had been delighted with her and taken it upon himself to be her mentor. While their interests diverged only more with age, the closeness had remained. If one of them had begun this scheme, Fingolfin was not surprised the other had become a part of it.

However, he imagined it left Fingon, sitting despondently across the desk from him, with many of the same questions that Fingolfin had: Why didn’t Turgon and Aredhel trust them anymore?

As to Fingon, Fingolfin felt relatively sure he knew the answer: they did not want their plans getting back to him, their father. Fingon had been condemned by his closeness to Fingolfin and his role as one of Fingolfin’s premiere advisors. It was not something likely to bring much comfort to him. Fingolfin wondered if they would have brought Argon into their scheme if he still lived.

“Father.” Blast. Once again, his eldest had been talking, and he had not been listening.

“Yes?” Fingolfin blinked and tried to look unruffled, a pantomime somewhat spoiled by the terrible shadows under his eyes.

“I asked if you wished me to send the scouts out again.”

Fingolfin’s fingers drummed arrhythmically on the desktop.

One would think that the traverse of so many people would have left a mark, and yet none of their scouts had thus far been able to say even which direction they had gone. Not only had been there no word from either Turgon or Aredhel, there had been none from any who might have noticed such a massive party on the move. It was as if they all simply turned to mist in their beds. Fingolfin would have been impressed, were he not so vexed (and still, he was impressed, for it was an incredible feat his children had managed).

“What is your mind?” he asked Fingon, to stall for time.

He did not wish to alarm anyone, nor publicize this event across Beleriand, but he had written a quiet note to Finrod. If anyone to date still knew the contents of Turgon’s mind, it was he, and Finrod had been an able partner since taking up leadership of what remained of his father’s people, and Fingolfin trusted him: he begged Finrod to keep his scouts’ eyes open for any hint of Turgon and Aredhel’s passing.

The blow of Finrod’s response made it clear to Fingolfin how much he had held out hope that Finrod would already know, and share, the location of his cousins and their people: Finrod claimed completely ignorance of any schemes or ideas of Turgon’s related to his departure. He promised to watch for them and ended with some cryptic encouragement which almost tempted Fingolfin to believe his nephew knew more than he was letting on, but he dropped it. Now more than ever, he needed to focus on the practical and not go chasing phantoms.

“Let us send them out once more,” Fingolfin declared, and Fingon’s tense look made him almost certain he had just been explaining why they should not do that.

Fingon sat silent and aggrieved across from him, the last of Fingolfin’s children, for the time being. Fingolfin noticed, looking at him then, his nose: it was his mother’s, always had been. Sometimes he made expressions which reminded Fingolfin so jarringly of Anairë it was a struggle not to show it, though on the whole it was Turgon who had taken most after her in looks.

“As you wish, Your Grace,” said Fingon.

Even Idril had gone with them, though this was not shocking. Turgon was not apt to leave her behind after everything they had been through already, nor was Idril inclined to allow herself to be abandoned. She had proven herself more than capable on the Ice, and therefore trustworthy with whatever her father had planned, but Fingolfin mourned the absence of her bright voice and determined courage, and of course, feared of what might become of them all.

Silence reigned over the room, testament to the questions they had already posed again and again, to the answers they could not determine and would not receive. Still Fingon lingered. When it had stretched well beyond the polite, Fingon rose from his seat, much as Fingolfin had seen the elder of Men do—as if there were a great invisible weight upon them. Fingolfin murmured some thanks to him and looked back down at the various outpost watch schedules he was reviewing—which were, frankly, a mess of crossed-out names and times and slapdash revisions and changes, normally things which would not even rise to the attention of the high king were he not seeking more who could even speculate as to where his children had gone—but he did not hear the door, and so he raised his head.

Fingon had paused in the doorway, his fingers on the frame, and looked back. “They may yet return,” he offered. His expression had given way to something both feebler and wilder, and Fingolfin felt keenly aware of what an unsteady place they were in now.

Fingolfin stared at him, trying to decide if Fingon felt it was he or his father who needed this quasi-delusional bit of encouragement.

“It is possible,” he allowed slowly.

Neither of them really needed to point out the obvious: But it was not likely. If they resurfaced, Fingolfin did not imagine it was with the intent of returning to their lives in Hithlum. Too much planning had gone into their flight for it to be a temporary state of affairs.

Rain tapped more insistently against the windows, and beyond the doors and walls of Fingolfin’s office, the clamor of the castle went on. Fingon’s dark complexion was half-subsumed into the low light of the hall beyond the door.

“I will gather the scouts,” Fingon said at last.

“Thank you,” Fingolfin replied.

The questions reeled on heedless of their audience’s comprehension or desire.

***

By the start of winter, there had been still no sign of the missing Elves. It was stupefying. People don’t just vanish into thin air! Fingolfin had raged to the ghost of his father in his bedroom on one furious, exhausted night with too many empty wine bottles foresting the table. They had to go SOMEWHERE! And how was it that no one had seen them? Had they decided to delve into the Earth like Dwarves and were living somewhere right under his feet? Had everyone else in Middle-earth gone temporarily blind?

Aredhel had already been known to vanish for weeks on end without word before or after; Fingolfin now felt doubtless that many—perhaps even most—of these excursions had served this project with Turgon. Was it she who had chosen their route from Hithlum? She who had helped thousands disappear overnight without a sound or a trace? Had Oromë returned to guide her? Did they have some favor of the Valar which Fingolfin had lost when he refused to return to Tirion?

And again, the question continued to torture him, through day, through night, pounding in the back of his mind no matter what else he occupied himself with: Why hadn’t they told him?

What had he done that two of his children had determined they could not permit their own father to know of their plans? At his most optimistic, he could only assume that whatever the project was, it felt so important to both of them that they could not risk their king’s disapproval: for having asked and been denied, they would be unable to enact their schemes even in secret. Most often, he flagellated himself asking when he had lost their trust, replaying their interactions over and over again in his mind, every one that he remembered since their bloody departure from Eldamar, asking when they had decided he could no longer be relied on to support them.

It was true that balancing the various views and opinions of his children and his nephews and niece since their arrival in Beleriand had been difficult—but after their long trek across the Ice, he had thought of them as a team. Disagree they might, but still they all worked towards a common goal: the defeat of Morgoth and the survival and flourishing of the Elves in Middle-earth.

When had Turgon and Aredhel become convinced they must travel their own path, apart from the rest?

He had been tempted to call Finrod to Hithlum to interrogate him, but thus far he had quelled that urge. He had to take his nephew at face value, and Finrod’s grief at the dead silence from his lifelong friend rang true (Fingolfin remembered the sight of them laying out in the yard with berry-stained hands and faces, awkward adolescent limbs sprawling as they gestured up to the clouds, their hair, Finrod’s gold and Turgon’s coal tangled together on the ground). If he began questioning them all now, trusting none of them to tell him the truth, he might as well lay down at the foot of Thangorodrim now and wait for Morgoth’s boot.

“Father!” Fingon’s voice cut through Fingolfin’s whirling thoughts and his son’s face swam back into focus, standing rigidly before his desk. Despite some of the best of Fingon’s wishes, his feelings were almost always painfully plain to see on his face. Presently, there was a tightness to his mouth and a glassiness to his eyes that belied any sense of calm professionalism he wished to project. “Shall I go?” he asked, and Fingolfin was somewhat taken aback with the thread of bitterness in his voice.

“Go?” he echoed, blinking.

“It is apparent that I have nothing which currently interests you.”

“That isn’t so, I asked you here.”

“Yet you do not listen to me,” Fingon cried. “So it has been since—you do not listen to me, Father!” He clasped his hands tightly behind his back and hung his head; there was a delicateness, a rawness in him Fingolfin remembered from those first weeks on the Ice, when Fingon could not sleep for the nightmares of blood staining his hands. Did he wonder if his actions in Alqualondë had warranted Turgon and Aredhel choosing not to speak to him of this?

Fingon had always been well-tempered, even-keeled, far more so than his siblings. Reckless, certainly, but he came by that honestly, Fingolfin was aware with rue, and not from Anairë’s side of the family. He so rarely lost his temper; Fingolfin had been relieved in years long past that he could mostly count on Fingon not to rise to the taunting of siblings or cousins. But that meant that when he did lose it, it behooved Fingolfin his father to mind it.

Fingolfin exhaled slowly and bowed his head, pressing the heels of his hands against his forehead.

“I find it difficult to listen to anything, presently, outside of my own thoughts,” he admitted. Perhaps this was too vulnerable a thought to share with a son, yet it was all he could offer in explanation, and he felt Fingon deserved the truth, even if he might scorn it. Had Fingon not yet been by his father’s side through trials enough that he no longer nurtured the youthful vision of him as a force invincible? He must be quite aware already that he was not infallible!

Fingon said nothing, shifting from foot to foot, so Fingolfin raised his head and said, “Do you have time to walk with me?”

At this, Fingon nodded.

Fingolfin left his desk, and went with Fingon up many dusty cobwebbed stairs to the nearest tower, that they might look out over the land and speak with small chance of being overheard. The breeze seemed to clear some of the cluttered thoughts from Fingolfin’s mind, and he closed his eyes, feeling its fingers run through his hair, thinking somewhat longingly of Rochallor in the stables below. Perhaps there was time for that later—perhaps a ride would help him think more clearly. (A lifetime ago they had gone together—Fingolfin and Anairë and Lalwen and the children, with Aredhel hooting and hollering at Lalwen’s antics and Argon braiding flowers into the mane of his mount.)

Fingon approached him at the crenellations, folding his arms, leaning his back against the stone. The light filtering through the thin cloud cover turned his brown eyes golden, though all the wind could manage with his thick braids was to stir a few errant wisps of hair against his cheek. His broad shoulders were hunched; Fingolfin observed him a moment and thought with surprise that Fingon seemed to expect he had been taken here for a private scolding. While he was still gathering his thoughts on how best to address that notion, Fingon confirmed it.

“You should release me from your counsel,” he said in the tone of one who has long considered a proposal before speaking it. His tone was flat, but beneath it lurked the stormy discontent which had plagued him since his siblings’ departure.

“You no longer wish to be an advisor?” Fingolfin asked. “You are the crown prince of this land.”

“You should release me,” Fingon repeated, staring down at the floor. “I have served you poorly, and it is apparent I have lost your trust.”

Fingolfin knew that part of parenthood was handling the surprises of one’s children—for they would always find ways to surprise you, for good and for ill, no matter how well you believed you knew them. Yet he found himself now fumbling in a way he had not since Fingon was far younger, and he could not say if it was the shock of the moment, or the chaos of his own mind of late.

“That is not so—”

“Is it not!” Fingon demanded, raising his voice to near a shout, snapping his gaze up to his father’s, his fingers digging into his arms. His lips were pursed; his eyelashes quivered; and Fingolfin’s hands twitched to take his child into his arms, but he held back. Longing pierced him like an arrow for the days when Fingon wept over scraped knees and broken toys, and Fingolfin could dry his eyes with hugs and kisses and promises of sweet bean buns.

“I should have known,” Fingon elaborated, again turning his face from Fingolfin. “I should have known—”

“You could not have—” But Fingon was a man grown, and had been for hundreds of years, and did not want his concerns dismissed by the coddling of his father.

“I could have!” Fingon insisted, his voice turning harsh once more. “If they had—I put my signature on the movements of supplies. I gave Turgon the jobs which granted him access to the things he took and trusted in his reports. I placed those requests for troop movements and trainings and weapons requisitions on your desk from both of them, which you approved.” A tremor went through him. “I went hunting with Aredhel! Perhaps I was there when she was plotting their exit!” Fingon boxed himself in his with his arms as if trying to compress himself. “I should have known they were planning something,” he said at last, bitterness dripping from his voice, set in the line of his neck as he hung his head.

Fingolfin remembered with childish vagueness his days of trailing after Fëanor, who had always seemed an adult to him, and bawling when he had the door shut in his face, and failing utterly to understand why Fëanor despised him (and also, the joy of those moments when Fëanor deigned to explain some project of his, or allowed Fingolfin to play with rejected models). With more clarity he remembered Fëanor and Findis’ hateful sniping and his mother’s harried efforts to balance two halves of a family which seemed to mix like oil and water, and his father’s dismay when the family dinner table once again turned into a catty dueling ring.

Fingolfin had been adamant with Anairë during their courtship that he did not wish his children to have such experiences. When the four of them had grown up close not only with each other, but also with the children of his brother Finarfin whom they counted in truth as siblings rather than cousins, Fingolfin could hardly contain his contentment. They had quarreled as children do and sometimes exchanged ugly words, but they also loved one another, openly and without rancor, and so Fingolfin had felt satisfied that he had put the troubles of his own family to rest.

Yet here was Fingon, alone, and utterly unable to understand how his siblings had left him behind.

Time is a circle, Fingolfin thought. He sighed, and looked out at the horizon again.

“Whatever they have done, I am sure they thought at the time it was the best course of action…”

“Is that meant to help?” Fingon snapped, glaring. “Their theoretical good intentions mean little when they have left us in such a position! A third of our people they have stolen, with supplies to match! How could they do this to us? How could they be so…so childish? So selfish? Merely for being asked to weather a few decisions with which they disagreed!”

Fingolfin had to bite his tongue to stop himself from leaping down Fingon’s throat to ask what decisions he viewed as the reasons Aredhel and Turgon had left.

He sighed once more and pushed down the urge to rub his temples. Lalwen had been relentless in the search for their missing people, but eventually, Fingolfin could no longer justify such excursions. They were scrambling to pick up the slack left by the departed. Fingon had helped his aunt in these endeavors; Fingolfin knew he had been trying to do as many of his siblings’ abandoned jobs as he could, but it was not sustainable.

Lalwen told him he needed to sleep and eat more; Fingolfin left many plates of food she brought to his office to tempt him untouched, or passed them off to one of his guards or couriers. It was unfair, he thought, that she should have to support him through the loss of three children now, and also his granddaughter. She remained optimistic they were alive, and if she was lying for his benefit, Fingolfin didn’t really want to know.

“Doubtless they had the interests of our people at heart and…” Fingolfin trailed off wearily, finding the end of that sentence did not reveal itself as he had hoped.

“Even when they have done this to us, still you speak in their defense,” said Fingon, scowling. It seemed an unnatural expression on his amiable face.

“As I spoke in yours, when you were convinced we must reconcile all the Noldor,” Fingolfin reminded him. “Your siblings were staunchly against it, if you recall.”

“But I was…” Fingon’s jaw worked as he contemplated some way in which this situation was different from that one. “I did not harm our cause.”

“In the end, no, and I believed then as now that you were right, but think you that Turgon and Aredhel were not genuine in believing that allying with Fëanor’s people would harm us?”

“If you had chosen otherwise,” said Fingon, “I would have heeded it. If I had done as I did and still you saw no path to reconciliation with them, I would never have undermined your efforts this way. I would not have…” His eyes flicked away, fingers squeezing into his arms until his knuckles went pale.

“It is my fault they kept this from you,” said Fingolfin then after a solid pause, for it seemed necessary to acknowledge this. “I have relied on you a great deal here, and certain am I that they believed I would learn of this if you knew.”

Fingon stared away from him. Fingolfin had him, albeit unintentionally, between a rock and a hard place. To insist his siblings should have trusted him to keep their secret was to admit he would have joined them in plotting behind their father’s back. To assert that he would never have kept such a thing from his king was to confess his siblings were right to mistrust him.

He wished he could call in Aegnor and Angrod, summon them to Hithlum for aid. But they were lords now in their own right, and with lands which abutted the Enemy, and they could not be spared merely to cheer Fingon. Perhaps he might send Fingon east—though, under the circumstances, he might not appreciate being sent away from home.

“Do you believe truly that I blame you that we did not anticipate this?” Fingolfin asked quietly as a fresh gust of wind whistled over them.

Again, Fingon’s shoulders hunched.

“You should,” he muttered. “What kind of obtuse fool could be blindsided by such a thing?”

“Myself, for one,” Fingolfin said dryly. Fingon winced.

“It is not the same, Father, we were…they…”

“One may share with a sibling what one does not with a parent,” Fingolfin agreed. Fingon gave a small nod, and then covered his eyes with his hands.

“We may only speculate now on their goals and motives and feelings,” said Fingolfin, shifting nearer to his son, so they were almost shoulder-to-shoulder. “And I understand more than you may think how tempting it is to believe the worst, to believe they secretly distrusted us, that they departed in anger and resentment, that they had lost faith in our cause entirely. But this you must remember, Fingon: They loved us, and they were good. I cannot believe, if I am honest, that they would have done this if they had seen any other way around it. I may disagree on the point, but I believe their hearts are genuine. I must believe they have some plan which serves the cause of Elfinesse and they truly think this is the best way for them to render aid.”

“By deceiving us?” Fingon cried. “By stealing from us? By betraying us?”

“They have not betrayed us,” said Fingolfin firmly. “They have weakened our position here, that is true—but they would never betray us to the Enemy.”

“How can you simply believe such things?”

“Not without effort,” Fingolfin admitted. “But the matter in the end is practical as much as sentimental: It serves us not at all to wallow in the thought that they wished to hurt us. Whatever the intentions of your brother and sister, we must keep our minds focused on the goal here, to your point earlier in my office. We can only work with what we have, and now we have no longer Aredhel and Turgon.” It seemed to burn his throat to say it, but it had to be said. Both of them needed to acknowledge this.

Fingon let out an awkward, choked huff, and he wept.

Now Fingolfin gathered his son against him, and Fingon put his face against his father’s shoulder and cried for the loss of his two remaining siblings. There were no more words, for what words could be put to such grief? What words could ever suffice for the loss of a sibling? (For Fingon, who had effectively now lost three?) Fingolfin remembered standing before Fëanor’s memorial, built by his sons, and finding that after so long of considering what he would say when he saw his older brother again, that there were simply no words. He tried to imagine a world in which he was the last one of them—in which Findis, Lalwen, and Finarfin were also gone—in which they had chosen to leave him behind (he could not now think on what Findis and Finarfin thought about himself, Fëanor, and Lalwen leaving for Middle-earth)—and decided it was impossible for him to truly understand Fingon’s pain.

“Forgive me, Father,” Fingon whispered. “I shall do better.”

“No,” Fingolfin replied, tightening his hold. “You have done as well as anyone could, and I am proud of you, and I am grateful to have you here still.” If Fingon had gone with them—if all three of Fingolfin’s living children had vanished without a trace—he did not know how he could have gone on at all. “I will need—have needed—your help in finding our footing once more. I have not been as present as I ought to be, and that is my fault as king, and I must ask your forgiveness for it.”

He drew back to look at Fingon’s face, though his son averted his teary eyes, and clasped his arms.

“It is long past time I reassigned their duties. You have carried too much these months, and for this also I must beg forgiveness. You were right: I have not been listening as I should. And as my advisor, I am grateful you said so.” He let out a long breath, briefly closing his eyes. “I did not wish to admit that it was necessary,” he confessed softly, unsurprisingly. “But this has been unfair to you, and had you not carried this burden so silently without complaint, I should never have let it go so long.” Fingon’s lower lip quivered, but he raised his eyes to look into his father’s gaze, his dark lashes clumped together from his tears. Fingolfin waited until he was sure he had his full attention before he spoke again, this time in the tongue of Tirion: “I am sorry, Findekáno.”

Fingon nodded, and swallowed, and then put his arms around Fingolfin and hugged him.

“I forgive you, Father,” he said, and for only a flash of a moment, Fingolfin thought of words laid aside for Finwë’s return to Tirion, a return which had never come. Even then, Fingolfin remained unsure what those words would have been, in the end.

Fingolfin embraced him again, and they remained there on the tower until Fingon’s eyes were no longer flushed red, and then Fingolfin called his advisors to an emergency meeting to discuss how to reallocate tasks and tools in light of the disappearance and presumptive non-return of Prince Turgon and Princess Aredhel.

***

Years on from those troubled days in Hithlum, in absence of his mother and father, in absence of his aunts and uncles, in absence of his brothers and sister, in absence of his beloved cousins, nearly all of whom were dead and gone, Fingon took up the crown of the high king of the Noldor in Middle-earth, and never, not even at the moment of his death, did he feel more alone.

#fingolfin #fingon #the silmarillion #tolkien tag #rocky writes #fanfiction #tolkien fanfiction

[ominouspositivity-or-else]

so much of a 21st century woman that i legitimately had to have a guy in my YA lit class explain to me how men's emotions work because i've only ever heard about it from idiotic women speaking for men or super macho guys who think any form of emotion is utter weakness for my entire life

#idk yall men are interesting #something about how they're way less nuanced than women #like girls expect the same level of emotional complexity with guys as is evident in us #which means like 45 different feelings all at the same time and playing into the stability of our psyches #meanwhile the guy might legit just be tired #such an interesting conversation and now i think i have to find music that accurately portrays what he told me about how men actually #like #feel emotions #this is so random i hate being a modern woman #like i love my right to vote and my ability to get high paying jobs and a stem degree if i had desired but like #women don't know how men work and it's a problem because we think they're like us and they're not and it's unfair for us to speak for them #but like we don't know what's real anymore either #blargh #thanks random guy in my upper level english class for your candor you answered a lot of my questions #there are many benefits to attending a catholic college

[sleepy-moron]

Hey I'm posting about actual world building and plot shit in stranger things for once look at that (absolutely spoils all of volume one)

I don't really know how to line this out in a theory evidence format because this is less of a theory based on what happens in the show itself but more on the thematics of the show and specifically this season+ vibes that I cannot explain the origin of. I don't even really think this is the most likely outcome, it's just something I can't stop turning over in my head.

Here's the rough idea: this season is not completely real. Wether it's some kind of vision or an alternate reality, or they wind up doing a time travel thing while still remembering what happened in this first series of events; there's something fucky going on with reality here.

There's just a lot that feels.....off to me about what happens in volume one? Like there are so many callbacks to plot points and scenes from previous seasons, but they also completely forget March 22 is Will's birthday, and the timeline for how long Will says the Byers' have been in California is wrong by a LOT. Steve and Nancy seem to have feelings for each other again, Mike is recycling parts of his character arc from season three, and El is back in the lab with Brenner again. There's this really cyclical feeling to everything, which tracks with all the clock motifs that Vecna has, and the upside down is literally still stuck at the same point chronologically that it was when Will first got taken by the demogorgon.

Plus the whole "gimmick" of Vecna as an antagonist is that he screws with his victims perception of reality. You mean to tell me that this show isn't going to have us in a trance that seems like it's reality at some point and not have it be obvious at first? I don't buy that shit for a second. Things feel weird, and if this show is as deliberate as its creator's want us to believe it is, that means something. There very much are strange things afoot here...

#stranger things #stranger things 4 #byler tumblr #st4 spoilers #stranger things spoilers #stranger things theory #I don't have compelling evidence for this #I just feel like there is something weird here #something something 'there are many obvious things in this world that nobody picks up on' or something along those lines #also the fact that the villain snatches eyeballs and the camera is the 'objective eye' in film just makes me more suspicious #this is some malarkey and I need answers #lotus flowers are not meant to be eaten

[pocketramblr]

That reminds me of a post you made a bit back, so I went and glanced at it and. You used the phrase "he values trust as far as he needs it" but I definitely don't think he has a very good perspective for all the times it's needed because I'd say "teaching children how to not die in a dangerous field job filled with fire and explosions you yourself have many times only survived by chance or unanticipated outside help also by chance" is definitely something that needs trust, if not his sake than for theirs.

well hindsight is 20/20, i'd argue his previous 5 years of teaching showed him he doesn't need trust to do the job and thats.... maybe... kinda.... like i don't agree but i can see his local rationality there? Thing is, Aizawa and I don't have the same job- we have maybe 1/6th of a same job. He's a homeroom teacher in a country with very different expectations of that role and as far as i understand it, its kinda weird he's later shown teaching content? (Hori is it too much to beg for some consistency or further elaboration on the plot device magic school)

that paragraph derailed, sorry- point is, Aizawa saw it as his job to keep the students alive, and did that by scaring them smart. As their homeroom teacher, the EASY and SIMPLE and NORMAL way to do that role would be to establish trust so they listen to your advice to not die but noooo. he decided to scare them, and then amp up stress so they'd listen to OTHER teachers (the ones actually providing the hero training and field practice stuff) more. After all, they'd look more honest and dependable in comparison. Considering that as far as we know none of his former students died in action, technically. technically he's doing his job sucessfully enough that he can argue he doesn't NEED trust/honesty here.

he's an idiot for doing it that way (and an idiot ignoring the other parts of the homeroom teaching purpose like. mental wellbeing and social emotional learning because he considers them less important) but still. this could really be fixed without even changing his attitude about trust and honesty if he just got some gosh darn teacher training

#thing is he got 156 expulsions in 5 years #which means either 1- expelling kids not in his class of 20 which means the other homeroom teachers approved the method #or at least were willing to let him do it #or 2- he expelled some kids multiple times #possibly the case being that the second time was 'for real' and to keep them out of the field so they didn't die in it #or 3- a mix of both #all 20 of his class last year got expelled at first #and i think all 20 moved up so none of them could have been double expellees #but his methods.......... do not completely undo his purpose #so he has *some* rational to continue them #not enough if you ask me #so yeah fun ask fun answer fun post to reference #thats actually a post i kinda regret making because...... so many people interpreted that wrong and said 'noooo trust is important to him' #and like....... the evidence they brought up would have little to do with the honesty thing #which i was focusing on because i was talking to a friend and realized we had very different views on honesty/trust #the friend of mine would sometimes lie no problem no reason if they did not feel you were absolutely entitled to the truth #just to do it #where i had moral implications about the truth in my head if there was no specific reason for lying #basically i felt you needed a reason to lie #and my friend felt you needed a reason to tell the truth #and sometimes that reason was 'you felt like it' but sometimes not #and so i said 'huh' and looked at lying liar aizawa #and wondered where he'd fit between those two views #and then i made the post and it blew up and i hated it because a bunch of people who thought aizawa is hot got mad at me for #morally judging him or something i guess (i was not but ok) #and no. aizawa is not hot. he's ugly. he's pretty. he's both pretty and ugly. but he isn't hot. hope that clarifies #anon #pocket talks to people #huh haven't talked about a my he ro character this much in a while i feel like #whats the occasion

[lesbegays]

thinking about how i hate my boss’s husband <3

#my boss is a conservative evangelical christian so i have Many Issues with her but she is kind with good intentions just very flawed ideas #basically she cares but a lot of that care is misdirected and ultimately harmful though certainly not all of it #her husband tho? literally the epitome of i don’t know how to explain to you that you should care about other people #maybe i am not giving him enough grace and understanding but he does not seem to give a shit how his actions affect other ppl #and also can’t stand the idea that someone could know more about or be more competent in a subject than him #he asked me a question and when i gave him an answer supported by scientific studies he said ‘i’d have to see evidence of that myself’ #local man believes scientific studies are lying bc he is not the one who performed them #i think he feels emasculated by the fact that his wife is the boss not him and he cannot be the authoritarian ruler of the company #sorry i try to give everyone the benefit of the doubt but i’m fed up w him

[tofixtheshadows]

I've been thinking a lot lately about how Kabru deprives himself.

Kabru as a character is intertwined with the idea that sometimes we have to sacrifice the needs of the few for the good of the many. He ultimately subverts this first by sabotaging the Canaries and then by letting Laios go, but in practice he's already been living a life of self-sacrifice.

Saving people, and learning the secrets of the dungeons to seal them, are what's important. Not his own comforts. Not his own desires. He forces them down until he doesn't know they're there, until one of them has to come spilling out during the confession in chapter 76.

Specifically, I think it's very significant, in a story about food and all that it entails, that Kabru is rarely shown eating. He's the deuteragonist of Dungeon Meshi, the cooking manga, but while meals are the anchoring points of Laios's journey, given loving focus, for Kabru, they're ... not.

I'm sure he eats during dungeon expeditions, in the routine way that adventurers must when they sit down to camp. But on the surface, you get the idea that Kabru spends most of his time doing his self-assigned dungeon-related tasks: meeting with people, studying them, putting together that evidence board, researching the dungeon, god knows what else. Feeding himself is secondary.

He's introduced during a meal, eating at a restaurant, just to set up the contrast between his party and Laios's. And it's the last normal meal we see him eating until the communal ending feast (if you consider Falin's dragon parts normal).

First, we get this:

Kabru's response here is such a non-answer, it strongly implies to me that he wasn't thinking about it until Rin brought it up. That he might not even be feeling the hunger signals that he logically knew he should.

They sit down to eat, but Kabru is never drawn reaching for food or eating it like the rest of his party. He only drinks.

It's possible this means nothing, that we can just assume he's putting food in his mouth off-panel, but again, this entire manga is about food. Cooking it, eating it, appreciating it, taking pleasure in it, grounding yourself in the necessary routine of it and affirming your right to live by consuming it. It's given such a huge focus.

We don't see him eat again until the harpy egg.

What a significant question for the protagonist to ask his foil in this story about eating! Aren't you hungry? Aren't you, Kabru?

He was revived only minutes ago after a violent encounter. And then he chokes down food that causes him further harm by triggering him, all because he's so determined to stay in Laios's good graces.

In his flashback, we see Milsiril trying to spoon-feed young Kabru cake that we know he doesn't like. He doesn't want to eat: he wants to be training.

Then with Mithrun, we see him eating the least-monstery monster food he can get his hands on, for the sake of survival- walking mushroom, barometz, an egg. The barometz is his first chance to make something like an a real meal, and he actually seems excited about it because he wants to replicate a lamb dish his mother used to make him!

...but he doesn't get to enjoy it like he wanted to.

Then, when all the Canaries are eating field rations ... Kabru still isn't shown eating. He's only shown giving food to Mithrun.

And of course the next time he eats is the bavarois, which for his sake is at least plant based ... but he still has to use a coping mechanism to get through it.

I don't think Kabru does this all on purpose. I think Kui does this all on purpose. Kabru's Post Traumatic Stress Disorder should be understood as informing his character just as much as Laios's autism informs his. It's another way that Kabru and Laios act as foils: where Laios takes pleasure in meals and approaches food with the excitement of discovery, Kabru's experiences with eating are tainted by his trauma. Laios indulges; Kabru denies himself. Laios is shown enjoying food, Kabru is shown struggling with it.

And I can very easily imagine a reason why Kabru might have a subconscious aversion towards eating.

Meals are the privilege of the living.

#Dungeon Meshi #Delicious in Dungeon #Kabru #Kabru of Utaya #Laios Touden #Dungeon Meshi meta #you can have him in the tags too. as a treat. #Dungeon Meshi spoilers #this was directly inspired by livelaughlaios's post about Kabru self harming but I decided it got too long to make it a direct reply #this is a theory I've been working on for weeks because I kept noticing this while skimming for screencaps #I'm hesitant to trigger tag this because of the way certain subcultures on tumblr operate #but if anyone needs me to add a content warning please let me know #also I included image descriptions! I did my best #I think they even help illustrate my points but my god were they sad to write. Kabru is so fucking sad you guys #musings with Dea

[yamujiburo]

Why I Love Hanamusa

I get this question very frequently but have never given a really in depth, definitive answer. All just kinda implied through my comics and spread out asks. So here's this I guess! Long post ahead:

First, as a Pokémon fan in her mid 20s, I love seeing a ship where the characters are both in their mid/late 20s. Already, they’re much more relatable to me and my current experiences. Most Pokémon ships are between preteens, which can be cute but ultimately don’t interest me as much as they used to when I was a kid myself. Not enough to get super invested in and draw a lot of fanart for anyways haha.

I’ll also start by saying that canon doesn’t always influence whether or not I’ll ship something. I’m much more drawn to potential. Could the characters work together? Do their personalities work together in a nice way? I feel like this so much of fanon is anyways. Especially with queer relationships because they’re rarely depicted in the first place. A lot of the context for these ships is usually up to the fans to piece together or make up in general. And that’s the fun part to me!

Jessie and Delia have only met in the anime a handful of times. Any interaction they’ve had has either been pleasant, or just a typical Team Rocket interaction, with Delia dismissing them/not seeing them as a threat. Already a great jumping off point for me since, truly, they don’t have any actual beef or true, ill feelings towards each other. It’s not TOO out of the realm of possibility for them to potentially fall for each other. “But Jessie chased Delia’s son around trying to steal his Pokémon!” That’s where that dismissive and aloof attitude that Delia has comes into play. I’ll go more into Delia’s whole deal a bit later but I do think this aspect of her personality is a large reason why this ship can work. It’s not that she doesn’t care that Jessie has a bad past, but she can tell that, on the inside, Jessie’s a good person. And, in a scenario where Jessie is trying to become a better person, is forgiving enough to give her a shot. I feel like this is such a solid foundation for a ship. A character who has done wrong but is trying to be better and another character who is willing to help them be better. A classic dynamic!

It’s not just one-sided though; where Jessie is the only one benefitting and learning from the relationship. I believe Delia could get a lot out of being with someone like Jessie. To understand why, I think it’s important to know these characters’ respective backstories.

Jessie is an orphan/foster child who grew up in poverty. Her mother Miyamoto (from The Birth of Mewtwo) was a Team Rocket operative herself, who went on a mission to find Mew. In order to do this, she had to leave Jessie when she was just a toddler. Unfortunately, Miyamoto went MIA on her mission leaving Jessie to more or less fend for herself. Jessie went through life with zero stability, evident by her MANY different careers and constant moving around. It’s implied in the show that she went from foster home to foster home, and later in life tried being an idol, weather girl, florist, wine connoisseur, actress, most notably a nurse and finally a Team Rocket field agent. And even while in Team Rocket, she, James and Meowth were always doing odd jobs to get by. We see that Jessie used to be a sweet kid, and even adult, but the world and her circumstances repeatedly did her dirty, leading her to become the character we know today. Hot tempered, mean, selfish, etc. But despite this, her soft side does still shine through for the people and Pokémon she cares about. She is incredibly loyal.

Delia, unbeknownst to a lot of fans, also had a rough past (see Pocket Monsters: The Animation). Like Jessie, she had a lot of dreams and aspirations like wanting to be a model and even a trainer. But when she was 10, her mother didn’t let her, telling her that she had to stay home and learn to run the family restaurant (she’s an only child). Delia’s father left her and her mother to be a trainer, and never returned. When she was 18, she married Ash’s father and became pregnant shortly after. But right after Ash was born, he also set off to be a Pokémon trainer. And soon after that, her mother passed away, leaving Delia with just the restaurant and baby Ash. This gives so much context to Delia’s attitude in the show. We see that Delia is pained whenever Ash leaves on a journey, but she never shows that pain to anyone. ESPECIALLY Ash. She’s very quick to shoo him off when he shows any sign of wanting to go on another journey and even when he returns home, she acts more excited to see Pikachu than him almost every time. Without all this backstory, it’s easy to just read this as a funny gag, BUT with context, I think it really shows how quickly Delia shuts down and detaches in order to not confront her own feelings. She’s afraid of losing people and getting hurt again.

All that said, I think Jessie and Delia provide each other with EXACTLY what the other needs. 

Aside from becoming rich and famous, Jessie’s biggest aspiration is to get married. In my opinion, this is more so an underlying want for love and stability. There is no one more stable in the show than Delia. Delia’s lived in Pallet her whole life, she’s worked at the same restaurant since she was young and she is always there when Ash comes back home. She has all the love, patience and stability Jessie needs and craves. While forgiving, Delia’s not stupid and can keep Jessie in check. Delia’s also just an angel, which I feel, would make Jessie want to be better. And on top of all this, on more of a surface level, Delia’s a chef and excellent cook. She shows love through cooking and Jessie, who grew up poor, regularly starving and eating snow, happily receives that love. Jessie’s able to live a happy and healthy life with someone like Delia.

Delia, as stated, is very stable. Likely pretty monotonous and solitary, especially living in such a small town like Pallet. This isn’t a bad thing but it’s a little sad when you consider that Delia also had dreams of traveling, being a model and a trainer. She had to give up so many dreams in order to fulfill her duties as a restaurant owner and mother. And even now, when Ash is off on his journey, she feels the need to always be home and be that stable pillar, leaving behind any ambitions she had, thinking it’s too late for her (she’s only 29 btw). But then along comes Jessie, dangerous, passionate, an absolute firecracker. Someone who’s whole life has been about chasing dreams and either, never giving up on them or finding a new dream to chase. Upon learning about Delia’s past aspirations, I could see Jessie pushing her towards them, letting her know that life’s too short and she has nothing to lose from trying. On top of this, Jessie’s also loyal. She, James and Meowth are depicted as doing anything for anyone who gives them food or shows them kindness. Delia does both so there’s no way Jessie would leave her. This fulfills an essential need for Delia, who is afraid of the people in her life leaving her.

There’s so much potential for mutual growth and learning between these two and I adore that. They compliment each other, they help each other and they bring out the best qualities in one another.

I’m not really sure how to end this and I could truly talk about them even more but I don’t want this to be tooooo long haha. OH I could end it with maybe the most funny aspect of this ship that I've brushed over and also what drew me to it in the first place. Jessie. As Ash’s stepmom. THE END.

#hanamusa #hanamusashipping

[earthtooz]

in which: alhaitham resorts to lying on top of you in order to get you speaking to him again.

quick alhaitham thought i needed to get off my mind, making out at the end lol, potentially ooc

there were a lot of things you didn’t expect when entering a relationship with alhaitham. you didn't expect him to have kaveh as a roommate, you didn’t expect him to overthrow the government, and you didn’t expect him to resort to pettiness in order to end the silent treatment you were giving him.

it’s suffocating beneath him, squished into his soft mattress with his body weight, muscles wrapped around you like a python whilst one arm is extended outwards, balancing a book. you wonder if he’s actually reading it, but you can tell he’s enjoying himself regardless, evident through the way he often turns his head to place a kiss on your exposed collarbone, burying his face into your warmth from here to there. 

for the umpteenth time, you grunt, losing your mind just a little. his body warmth was getting too much, and you’ve been lying here for who knows how long, just staring at the ceiling of his bedroom.

you want to protest, berate him for flattening you before shoving him off, but that would mean surrendering, and this time, you want alhaitham to be the one to give up first. 

as if hearing your thoughts, your grey-haired lover then glances up at you, sleepy gaze filtered through messy strands of hair that have fallen in front of his eyes. you almost cave at the domesticity of it all, only just stopping yourself from brushing his bangs away. 

“still upset?” he murmurs, putting his book face-down to wrap his arms tighter around your torso. “fine. have it your way, i’m going to nap.”

“no-” he perks up at the sound of your voice, raising an eyebrow as a mask of smugness gleams over his face. you shut your mouth immediately, cursing at yourself to slip up so easily, but you really needed to stretch out your legs and the other discomforts of lying like an unmoving plank beneath alhaitham. 

“what was that?” challenges your boyfriend. you don’t answer him, merely staring him down as he sits back, grabbing your wrists. “oh come on, i know you want to say something, out with it.” 

shaking your head, he scoffs at your stubbornness as if his isn’t just as frustrating, and gently caresses your hand. his touch is tantalising, urging you to give in, and paired with that lidded look of his, it’s practically impossible not to.

not many people get to see alhaitham like this, you realise. most know him as an indifferent, closed off, and unapproachable scribe, turned grand sage, turned scribe, yet you get the honour of seeing him as this. ��talk to me already,” he demands gently, not letting his grip waver even as you keep trying to pull your hands away, only slipping away so far before he’s holding you again.

there aren’t many battles you can win against him, you know that, and one of them was a battle of strength. as he holds your wrists tight to your sides, his face so close to yours, you feel his earlier playfulness melting into something sincere. 

“are you still mad?” asks alhaitham, furrowing his eyebrows slightly as a pout appears along his lips. the response you give him is a petulant turn of your head. he sighs through his nose. “i’m sorry, okay? i was out of line, i should have listened to you, alright?”

his tone is uncharacteristically kind and warm, warm enough for you to give in to his pleas.

“you mean it?” you tease, grinning widely at him. in the blink of an eye, the tension from alhaitham’s shoulder seeps away like sand, and he sighs with relief before agreeing, a solid ‘yes’ slipping through his mouth. “then i accept your apology.”

“you minx, enjoying the sight of me like this, aren't you-” he murmurs, and you swallow his brewing snide remarks with a kiss, closing the gap by firmly pressing your lips against his. alhaitham is not surprised by your sudden affection. rather, he welcomes it, melts into you wholly as a hand holds the back of your neck to keep you against him. you're warm and precious and everything he could ever desire, so he can't help but let his hands wander, searching for more.

as your mouths slot together, there’s a delicate exchange of apologies that words cannot express; ironic, since alhaitham knows of several ways to apologise in a multitude of languages. nevertheless, he thinks that this is the best method.

with the way you move in sync with him, he can tell that this is your favourite too. 

© EARTHTOOZ 2023, do not steal, translate, repost my fics and do not recommend my fics onto any other site.

#vibe check kinda fic for him #the way i am literally seething biting my hand and lips to try and not let the end escalate #alhaitham x reader #al-haitham x reader #al haitham x reader #genshin impact x reader #alhaitham fluff #al-haitham fluff #genshin x reader

[fangswbenefits]

Discovery

Summary: Miguel tries to fix the damage of his obsession for you, only to discover a secret you’ve been keeping that will change everything…

Pairing: Miguel O’Hara x spider-woman!reader

Word count: 3k

18+. Miguel POV. Obsessed and jealous Miguel. Inexperienced/In*ocent/V*rgin reader. Mast*rbation. Voye*rism (have to thank this anon).

Part 1 (if you’re just starting out) - Previous Part

Miguel O’Hara took pride in being able to keep his emotions at check.

For the most part, at least.

But when it came to you, he constantly found his reason at war with his feelings.

The way you were eyeing him expectantly, made his stomach flip.

“Is there something wrong?”

Many things.

For once, he didn’t want to lie to you. However, he dreaded what might happen in case he told you the truth.

Shaking his head, he took your pad in his hands, and glanced over at his watch.

100%

He wanted to just open the file and finally know who this Tom individual was, but he could see a faint frown settle on your face.

“Why can’t I have access to the settings?” you asked, coming to stand by his side to glare at the lit up screen.

He really didn’t want to lie.

“I needed to adjust the prototype first, before giving you full access,” he managed to say.

Great, Miguel.

Your eyes moved to glare at him. “You could have informed me of that.”

He could only nod, he tapped and scrolled through the interface, overriding the block he had placed on it a couple of days ago.

You didn’t seem upset in the slightest. If anything, it you seemed… tired? Sleepy?

“It’s done,” Miguel said, handing the pad back to you. “The interference was probably a mic, by the way.”

As you fought back a yawn, your face twisted into confusion. “A mic?”

Miguel was trying to play it casually, hoping that it would be enough to deflect this issue altogether.

But you… you were not easily detracted.

“Why is there a mic in my suit?”

His heart rate had nearly doubled, and he felt his sweat grow cold as your gaze intensified.

Then, he saw you straighten up as if hit by a sudden realisation.

“You… don’t trust me?” your voice was but a whisper and you started backing away from him. “You’re spying on me?”

Somehow, the conclusion you had drawn was almost as appalling as the truth.

“No! That is not why.”

“Then why?”

Miguel pressed his lips together, and you took his silence as an answer.

“Oh… you really don’t trust me, do you?” you went on, tears welling in your eyes. “I mean… Jessica did tell me you were against me joining Spider Society… I just… thought she wasn’t being serious…”

Miguel stepped closer, feeling a surge of indignation. “That was before I realised your potential!”

You blinked your tears away angrily. “You’re not even denying it.”

He let out an exasperated sigh. “I had my doubts at first, yes. Your inexperience, for example. But Jess quickly convinced me to take you in,” he continued, knowing that he sounded desperate at this point. “You are a very talented spider, and I realised that nearly right away.”

Then your eyes widened all of a sudden as if you had just realised something daunting.

Miguel felt his stomach flip, already anticipating more something much worse.

“Oh… oh… you — you sent Jessica to my dimension because of Tom…” you said, visibly shaken. “He’s subject A. You… you… woah!”

Miguel felt control slip through his fingers with each accusation you threw at him.

There was no point denying it, and he didn’t want to lie to you. If anything, he only sought to do damage control.

But your usual calm and sweet demeanor had long vanished.

“Who do you think Tom is?” you said between gritted teeth, clenching your fists at your sides. “Some… some secret weapon against Spider Society? Is that it?”

It was evident from your reaction that he clearly wasn’t that.

“Listen, I d-”

But you immediately cut him off, tears streaking down your face. “You want to know who he really is? Do you?”

In truth, he did. However, not at the expense of your emotional stability. Not like this. Everything was going sideways and he felt petrified.

“You don’t have to.”

“I’ll tell you!” you spat, hurt swelling in your voice. “Three days after I got bitten by that spider, I was struggling to get the hang of all the changes.” You began pacing nervously around the room, no longer looking at him. “I was heading toward a robbery site and… Tom was there… the criminals had dynamite and were threatening to blow up the building,” your voice cracked momentarily and you took a deep breath before continuing. “In an effort to get him out of there, I shot my web at his chest, but lost control and balance, and sent him flying across the street as the explosives went off…”

Miguel could only stare from a distance, feeling the frustration in your words.

You halted and glared at him, lips quivering and more tears spilling. “Tom broke his arm and suffered a serious concussion. Because of me.”

He opened his mouth to offer words of comfort, but decided not to interrupt.

“I grew up with Tom. He is — was my best friend,” you sniffled, lowering you gaze. “I even had feelings for him at one point, which was ridiculous… he was too good for me, anyway.”

Miguel took a few steps in your direction, wanting to convince you otherwise, but you immediately retreated away from him.

“Thankfully, he managed to fully recover. No one found out it had been me who caused it in the first place… everyone just assumed it happened because of the explosion…” you mumbled, before crossing your arms and hugging yourself, showing him you had done this multiple times before in search for comfort. “And I was a coward… I couldn’t bring myself to tell him the truth… so I removed myself from his life.”

A tense silence followed.

Nothing could have prepared Miguel for this revelation, and he couldn’t help but to feel a wave of sympathy for you wash down on him.

You then eyed him. “I don’t want your pity. I deserve this. I was never a decent spider-woman and-”

He quickly stopped you. “That is absolutely not true and you are not a coward.”

“Oh, but I am. When Jessica approached me with the offer to join you, I didn’t even think twice,” you confessed. “I’d do anything to spend as much time away from my dimension as possible.”

“You still perform your duties, as far as I know,” he pointed out rationally.

You let out a pained groan. “Because I have to! I’d much rather stay in the lab, piecing things together and be useful in other ways.”

“You could have told me.”

This time, you frowned and Miguel realised such expression didn’t suit you. At all.

“I didn’t want to. I didn’t have to. This is something I’m ashamed of.” You then pointed at his watch. “Your file won’t tell you any of this, and I really wish you hadn’t gotten involved, because this was my story to tell.”

Your words pierced through him like sharp knives, and he realised he had not only gone too far, but had also managed to hurt you in the process.

“If there is anyone here who understands what you are going through, it’s me,” he began carefully. “I know how it feels to want to do the right thing, only for the consequences to be disastrous.”

He watched your face soften ever so slightly, and you didn’t flinch away from him when he came to stand right in front of you.

“I’m really sorry that I overstepped the line,” he said softly. “I really care about you. That is the reason why I had the mic in your suit and why Jessica went looking for Tom.”

A half-truth, he figured. He couldn’t flat out say the actual reason. How would he even explain that he was obsessed with you? How could that justify any of this?

Simply put, it couldn’t.

And you would resent him.

So, he settled for a half-truth. He did care about you. Immensely. More than he could possibly reason with. But he just couldn’t have you know how much he wanted you to be with him to the point of extreme obsession.

Especially not after discovering this secret of yours.

He had to win you over.

“There is no one who can understand how hou feel better than me,” he whispered, cradling your face in his hands, tilting it enough to have your eyes meet his.

“But… you’re the Miguel O’Hara… you’re so… ” your voiced trailed off.

“Spider Society exists because of my mistake. Many people died at my hands, even if it was unintentional,” said with a sigh. “That is a burden I’ll carry forever with me. What you see here came at a price.”

You swallowed.

“But you don’t have to go through this.”

“How so?”

He caressed your cheeks with his thumbs. “You get a chance set things straight. Tom is still alive. I don’t get to have that.”

He would never have Gabriella back. Ever. That was the ultimate price he had to pay.

Your gaze dropped and he saw a couple of tears streaming down your face. “It’s not that simple.”

“It’s not, but it’s still an open door. A choice you have.”

He felt your hands grip his wrists for support, as silence took over you.

“I just wish you’d told me,” he whispered, closing his eyes and planting a kiss to your forehead. “I would have been here for you sooner.”

The effect of his words coupled with the gesture were enough to have you break into a sob, tears streaming down your cheeks, as Miguel held your face with both hands.

This was painful to witness.

He knew all too well how it felt to feel powerless and thinking that you’ve run out of options.

He knew you now. He understood you. Better than anyone ever could.

“I’m… s-sorry…” you mumbled, trying to keep yourself from crying. “You’re… getting all w-wet…”

Miguel couldn’t help but to smile endearingly at your concern, as your tears began to roll down his hands.

“Do not apologise,” he said firmly. “You can cry. I’m here for you.”

Nodding, you opened your eyes again and tilted your had back to stare at him.

“Please s-stay…” you said in between sobs, your hands gripping him tightly. “Please…”

You were killing him.

Little by little.

Miguel would give you everything.

He nodded and you stepped back and let go of him, running the back of your hands across your cheeks to dry them.

Then you went to sit on your couch, removing the clutter of wires and boxes that were in the way.

Miguel spotted a blanket nearby and came to sit by your side, draping it over your shoulders.

You leaned against the backrest, and he followed suit, feeling your head drop to his shoulder.

“Please remove the mic… and delete that file…” you mumbled.

“I will.”

He swung his arm across your from you, to pull you closer to him.

The two of you fell into a comfortable silence, and Miguel closed his eyes, relieved that he had managed to somehow control the damage he had caused. Unfortunately, it had come at the expense of you having to open up to him, and he felt guilty for that…

He knew he had to prove himself to you, and was grateful that you hadn’t chosen to shut him out completely.

“Somehow… this was sort of cathartic?” your voice was suddenly heard.

Miguel squeezed your arm tenderly.

“I had… never told this to anyone…”

Guilt hit him at once. “I’m sorry…”

“Don’t be… I think I needed to let it out,” you mused against him.

He couldn’t help but to feel an intense wave of compassion for you. There was no way around it: Miguel was in too deep when it came to you. Everything about you pulled him in and gripped him.

You would always be his sweet girl.

His devotion was yours.

Just yours.

“Hey, Miguel?”

He felt you shift beside him and he looked down to meet your sleepy eyes. “Yes?”

“Can I kiss you?”

Your words didn’t register at first, and he thought he had misheard you.

“What?”

You slipped your feet under you, before leaning slowly into him, face drawing near. “Can I kiss you?”

Denial hit him. “You’re just sleepy.”

But you didn’t back down. “No… I just…” your eyes darted down. “Can I?”

His heart went into a frenzy and he was left speechless. Your eyes were set on his lips and he somehow found the strength to nod.

It took you a couple of seconds to adjust yourself, and once you did, you closed the the gap, parting your lips slightly.

Miguel was left perplexed.

Weeks of yearning and obsession were finally being vindicated.

“Pretty eyes,” you whispered, breath fanning his lips. “So pretty…”

Your noses brushed together and he fought the urge to pull you into his lap at once.

“You’re the pretty one…” he said truthfully.

A smile curved your lips even through your sleepiness. “I’m going to kiss you now, Miguel O’Hara…”

And you did.

The moment your lips met his, Miguel felt his body react. It didn’t take long for the blood to rush down to his cock, slowly stirring it.

He could taste the inexperience on your lips as you kept breaking the kiss to gasp for air. It was blatantly obvious you needed some help figuring out what do next, so he happily obliged.

With one hand he managed to shift your leg to swing across his, and with the other he propped you onto his lap.

You broke the kiss, adjusting yourself and lacing your arms behind his neck and taking his lips again.

This time, he pressed his thumb to your chin, parting your lips, so he could deepen the kiss with his tongue. You immediately complied, and allowed him in with a soft whimper.

Miguel finally tasted you.

His sweet girl.

You came down to press your crotch against his painfully hard cock, and he immediately had to still your hips and lift you slightly.

You broke the kiss again, confusion in your eyes. “What…”

He didn’t dare confess it to you.

Instead, he pressed on your lower back so you would lean into him again with a kiss.

He wanted to taste you, but he couldn’t have you sit on his cock like that… he would absolutely burst.

His sweet girl sounded so sweet and receptive…

He felt you trying to defy his hold on your hips, surely wanting that friction, but he couldn’t afford that.

As much as he wanted to feel you grinding on him, he would be too embarrassed to cum so soon, and that thought was what ultimately prevented him from reaching the point of no return.

He brought one hand to grip your wrist, allowing the top half of his digital suit to disintegrate, so he could place the palm of your hand on his chest, revelling in your heated skin against his.

Suddenly, you parted from him with a gasp. “Wait… I’m…”

He arched an eyebrow in confusion and watched as you snaked your arm in between you two, sliding your hand down your sweatpants.

Miguel’s eyes widened and he was about to lose it until he realised what was really happening.

You slowly removed your hand and glared at it. “Oh.”

Your fingers were drenched in your wetness.

You were soaked.

For him.

He carefully looped his fingers around your wrist, wanting to taste you, but that sent you into an immediate frenzy, and you fumbled to get up from his lap, nearly falling back if not for his incredible reflexes.

“Easy…” he cooed, caressing his thumb along your pulse point. “It’s okay. We don’t have to do anything.”

You tumbled to the side and he let go of you, watching you sit back against the cushioned backrest and looking startled like a deer in headlights.

Just how inexperienced were you?

“Thanks…” you mumbled, chest heaving erratically. “I’m… yeah… and sorry…”

Miguel sat up straighter and arched a brow. “You don’t have to apologise.”

You nodded, your eyes falling to his bulge. “I mean… for that…”

Only you would ever apologise for giving him a raging boner.

His sweet girl…

“Don’t worry,” he reassured, feeling his heartbeat slow down. “Are you okay?”

“Yes…”

He offered a warm smile. “Good.”

Miguel didn’t even know where to begin. He couldn’t quite grasp the events of tonight, and it almost felt like a fever dream.

He was so used to getting hard from just the thought of you, that he couldn’t believe he was now hard because of you.

Still, the way you had reacted when you realised how wet you were for him led him to believe that maybe you were far more inexperienced than he had anticipated.

And he would respectfully give you all the time and space.

He would wait for you to ask him for more.

He could wait. His throbbing cock not so much, but he had other ways of dealing with that.

“Can I use your bathroom?” he asked, adjusting himself over his suit.

Your eyes widened. “Oh…”

“Just to ease some of the tension,” he immediately said.

He was desperate to let his cock spring free, and let it calm down until he was back at his apartment.

You then averted your gaze. “Can you… do it here?”

Miguel was utterly and completely taken aback.

“I… I have never…” you went on, quickly pulling your knees to your chest, wrapping your arms around them, and covering your face. “Nevermind…”

Oh.

Now it all made sense.

“Hey… look at me,” Miguel started, reaching out to tug at your wrist. “It’s okay.”

Slowly, you lifted your head to peer at him with evident hesitation. “Is it too… weird?”

“Not at all.”

And he meant it. By this point, he could feel his cock twitching more often, as more and more precum began to drip from the tip.

“Are you sure?” he asked, needing the absolute confirmation.

You promptly nodded, resting your chin on your forearm, eyeing him intensely.

He paused for a moment, expecting to be jolted away from this dream, or to have you backtrack.

“Please…” you whispered.

Swallowing hard, he allowed himself to sink into the backrest, before having the lower half of his suit disintegrating, and his cock finally released from its confinements.

Your eyes widened and your lips parted.

An instant ego boost that caused him to hiss as he wrapped his fingers around it. His body was so ready for you. Almost too ready. It didn’t take long before Migue felt droplets of precum sliding down his hips.

He couldn’t tear his eyes from you and it only added to the pleasure he felt.

Giving himself a few tentative pumps, he watched closely as you glared at the motion, curiosity splattered all over your face.

The first moans escaped his lips and he nearly slid his eyes shut, trying to stop himself from cumming too quickly.

But he didn’t want to miss out on anything you had to offer.

Miguel soon found a steady rhythm and began to fuck his hands like so many times before. But unlike those other times, he had you as an audience and he knew he wouldn’t last long no matter how hard he tried to muster images of the Vulture to dwindle his impending orgasm.

Then, you shifted closer, your legs dropping, but still pressed together.

He groaned, knowing exactly why you were being so fidgety.

Your hand was clutching at the hem of your shirt as a way to anchor yourself from the visual stimulation.

“You can touch yourself…” Miguel rasped, tightening the grip around himself, precum now flowing down his knuckles.

You pressed your legs tighter together and Miguel had to halt his motion or he would burst.

“…. or not,” he added, not wanting to overstep your line of comfort.

Your eyes darted to his face momentarily and, for the second time, Miguel saw your hand disappear inside your pants. You gasped softly and he could only guess that you must have reached your clit.

You let out the sweetest whimper, and Miguel’s cock twitched immediately.

His chest heaved and he swiped his thumb across the tip of his cock, letting out a groan.

He watched in awe as your arm moved rhythmically, and your eyes fluttered shut.

“Look at me…” he breathed.

You were biting yout lip, but did what he asked.

The urge to replace you hand with his — better yet, his cock — was almost painful and he knew he was heading towards the precipice, having to space out his strokes.

Your gaze fell to his hand. “How’s it so hard?”

He would have laughed if the situation wasn’t so dire and him being in need of release.

You scooted closer and closer, until your face was mere inches away, while still touching yourself.

For him.

Because of him.

“Why do you think?”

You gasped and he saw your hand slid out of your pants, fingers glistening with your wetness.

“Can… I?”

Miguel was too far gone to deny you of a newfound experience, so he nodded, bracing himself for what was about to happen.

He would burst.

You chewed on your lower lip as if unsure of what to do next, but he wanted you to take your time. A few moments later, you reached down with your soaked hand and he lets go of his cock, welcoming your touch.

He threw his head back and had to muster all of his willpower not to cum right away, as the pads of your fingers tentatively traced the underside of his cock, slowly moving to graze the veins that bulged from under the sensitive skin.

Everything inside him was suddenly burning like wildfire and he couldn’t stop his hips from jerking up.

By the time your thumb reached his tip and grazed slowly, Miguel hissed violently.

“Stop… stop - stop… please-” he begged, but was already being overtaken by the suffocating grip of a powerful orgasm.

You had indeed stopped touching him, but the damage had already been done.

His cock twitched rhythmically as hot spurts of cum began to cover his abs. Witch each roll of his hip, Miguel felt his vision blur and his fangs extend. He groaned your name a couple of times, before his words started to fuse together in a incoherent mess.

The stiffness of his peak shattered after a while and he slumped into the couch, struggling to even out his breathing.

Once he was finally able to open his eyes again, you came into his field of vision, holding a towel in your hands.

“Here,” you said as a smile broke across your face, before sitting by his side and offering it to him.

Even through the haze of an orgasm, Miguel was ablet o feel his heart skip a beat from your tenderness.

He proceeded to clean himself, wiping away the impressive amount of cum that had pooled on his lower abdomen.

“That was…”

His eyes were immediately on you. “Do you want me to…” he trailed off, allowing the not so subtle implication to dangle.

You didn’t catch it at first, but his silent was very telling.

“Oh, no — no, I’m fine, thanks,” you said with a chuckle.

“It’s only fair that I return the favor…”

You shook your head more vehemently this time. “It wasn’t a favor to begin with, Miguel. I was curious and… just wanted to watch you do it,” you mumbled as his digital suit began to cover his body again. “I had never… yeah — I’m still…”

Miguel had his suspicions that you were inexperienced, but he had no ultimate proof of that.

But this… “You’ve never had sex before?”

You settled back on the couch, crossing your legs. “No.”

He wasn’t sure of what to say. Was there even anything he should say?

So, he fell silent, waiting for you to take the lead.

“But… this was an interesting experience,” you eventually went on with a smile. “Do you… regret it?”

“No.”

But he could see doubt already settling on your face. “Maybe it was too much.”

“Not for me,” he said truthfully, straightening up in his seat. “Don’t think that, please.”

You nodded, but Miguel felt a pang of dread spread across his body. The last thing he wanted was for you to regret having opened up to him.

He had been longing for this for far too long to let it all be for nothing.

You were his sweet girl and you had his heart.

“Listen,” he started, set on preventing that from happening. “I can only speak for myself, but that was extremely hot. You are so, so attractive,” he went on, earning a doubting glare from you. “You are. I usually last longer than that.”

Your lips curled into an embarrassed smile, but Miguel could feel his words weren’t exactly reaching you.

Then silence took over.

You kept staring at your hands, head down and humming softly.

“Are you okay?” he shifted closer.

You took a deep breath. “I was thinking about your words earlier…”

“Yes?”

“Yes.”

He watched you closely. “And what are you thinking?”

“I think you’re right, Miguel,” you drawled out, your voice but a whisper. “I’ve been blaming myself for what happened to Tom for too long.”

A jab of compassion and empathy tugged at his heartstrings. “You’re absolutely right.”

Then, lifting your head, you met his eyes. “I think… I want to meet up with Tom again. Thank you for making me realise that, Miguel,” you finished with a sweet smile.

Part 6

Masterlist

#miguel o’hara x reader #miguel o’hara #miguel o’hara smut #miguel o’hara x fem!reader #miguel ohara x reader #spiderman 2099 x reader #spiderman 2099 #miguel x reader

[walpu]

pre-relationship stage with them

characters - Gepard, Aventurine notes- gn!reader, pining, light angst but mostly fluffy, a bit of hurt/comfort. I love blonde preservation men okay. no beta we die like the economy in my country

Gepard

Poor poor Geppie.

He pines so much. Treats his love for you like a tender flower. Even his feelings for you is something so precious to him, he's happy to simply be in love with a person like yourself.

I feel like this poor man willd try so much to do everything for you without giving away how deeply he cares and how intense his feelings are.

"Aw, lil' Geppie, you care about y/n so much!"

"I- I do not. I mean, of course I do! But- There's nothing surprising about it. After all, it's my duty as a Captain to care about every citizen. And, of course, it's my duty as a friend to care about y/n.

Sure, Gepard. Sure.

He would never say something like this to your face though. After all, he simply can't lie to you.

Oh but how he adores you. His face literally lights up when he sees you, the most gentle smile blooms on his face when he watches you doing even the most trivial task.

Tries to act like his usual self around you but it's pretty evident to everyone that you're his weak spot.

Would gently scold you if you would ever put yourself in danger or break any rules.

If you would get seriously hurt would actually lose his mind. Would blame himself even if the situation has nothing to do with him. Beats himself up, asks for your forgiveness and does his best to help you.

Despite the popular belief that he would prioritize his work over his beloved, I don't think it's true. Sure, he takes his duties seriously, but he would always find time for you. Would make sure to see you at least two times a weak, would answer your texts and calls. If you need him, would certainly be right by your side. Even if it means he would have to work overtime later.

Tease him a bit and he's all red. Doesn't try to stop you though, secretly adores your attention.

Would be oblivious to the fact that you like him back. Like. Really dense about it.

He's just so used to giving, to protecting, he simply doesn't expect anything in return. He has silently accepted the fact that you may never love him back, but he will be there for you regardless of it, no matter what.

Plus, he feels like he may not be the one for you. Like you need someone who doesn't have to constantly put their life in danger, who can always be by your side, who won't break your heart. Because he's painfully aware that each fight may actually be his last. That he may not come back to you.

Speaking of that. He would make sure to say a proper goodbye to you before every battle or expedition. Nothing too sappy or depressing, he doesn't want to make you worry, after all. Would probably tell you to take care of yourself, to sleep well and to eat healthy food lol. He really just wants to make sure that he got to see you before heading straight into the battle.

If you're a Silvermane guard as well, would restrict himself even more, not wanting to use his position or to be pushy. However, would still be worried sick, even more so. Would still talk to you before every battle, asking almost begging you to be careful.

Loves giving you head pats.

Generally the goodest boy. Just make sure to make the first move because otherwise he would be satisfied with just being your loyal puppy.

Aventurine

Good lord.

This man is such a mess.

Be ready for a mindfuck but not because he's manipulative towards you or something like that but because there's so many layers of trauma in him.

You have to be patient with him okay.

I feel like pre-relationship stage would be so confusing to him. He had flings in the past, okay? Short ones, meaningless. Something to distress, to feel another person's touch, to feel some sort of connection, no matter how shallow it is. He knew he uses those people and that those people use him in return. Not once he asked them to be gentle or caring.

But with you it's so different. Doesn't matter if your relationship started sexually and developed into something more or if it was mostly platonic/slow since the beginning. He still feels something. And he's not sure if he likes it.

Sometimes it feels so good to be seen, to be addressed as a person, not just as a tool. But sometimes it scares him. After all, this man hasn't been vulnerable with anyone for a long, long time.

I'm sorry but I feel like he would try to pull away from you a bit after realizing how much you actually mean to him.

Oh but he will crumble if you reach out to him, okay? He simply can't ditch you like that, not when you see him for him and want him for him.

Even if it's scary.

Would slowly relax around you. Don't expect him to open up easily but still, the more time you spend together, the more his cocky mask will slip away.

Will randomly and out of the blue tell you small details about his past. You two may walk down the street together and he will see something that reminds him of Sigonia so he will share this memory with you.

It may be the smallest thing but it means a lot to him that you listen. Even this tiny moments of vulnerability are hard for him.

On the more positive note, he's so fun to be around. Would tease you and cling to you all of the time. If you tease him back, he would pretend to be offended but would actually enjoy the playful banter a lot.

Just don't tease him too much about him becoming more and more clingy with each passing day.

Spoils you rotten. New clothes, jewelry, watches, shoes, anything you may want or need. He still can't quite get rid of this idea that you have to be convenient for someone to be valuable. It's not like he's trying to buy your love but... Maybe subconsciously he does. Once again, be patient. This man is so used to the fact that all of his alliances are build on mutual benefit that it's still hard to accept that you're really here for him.

Spoiler even when he will feel more stable in your relationship and his mindset will turn more healthy, gift giving will still remain one of his love languages.

Just like Gepard, would care greatly about your safety. He may be careless about his own life but never with yours.

Loves, loves, loves physical contact. As I said before, gets very clingy, putting his arm over your shoulder or tugging on your sleeve. If he's feeling down, would crawl to you side and subtly brush his shoulder against yours or lean to your side. He may still have his confident smile but those small gestures show that he wants you to be the one holding him this time.

Invades your personal space a lot actually. Texts you constantly too lmao.

LOVES SILLY NICKNAMES. Would call you his dearest darling in the sweetest voice during the most inappropriate time and then laugh at your reaction. Would settle for something more casual like "baby" when he's not trying to be a pain in the ass. Still tries to play it off as something teasing. Deep down yearns to call you this without having to pretend that this is just a playful banter between two friends.

Oh and he would dance around the topic of dating, throwing hints but never having the courage to ask openly. So good luck with him.

#hsr #honkai star rail #hsr aventurine #aventurine #aventurine x reader #gepard #gepard landau #hsr gepard #gepard x reader #walp's writing

[mikeo56]

I watched the uncensored video of US airman Aaron Bushnell self-immolating in front of the Israeli embassy in Washington while screaming “Free Palestine”. I hesitated to watch it because I knew once I put it into my mind it’s there for the rest of my life, but I figured I owe him that much. 

I feel like I’ve been picked up and shaken, which I suppose was pretty much what Bushnell was going for. Something to shake the world awake to the reality of what’s happening. Something to snap us out of the brainwashed and distracted stupor of western dystopia and turn our gaze to Gaza.

The sounds stay with you more than the sights. The sound of his gentle, youthful, Michael Cera-like voice as he walked toward the embassy. The sound of the round metal container he stored the accelerant in getting louder as it rolls toward the camera. The sound of Bushnell saying “Free Palestine”, then screaming it, then switching to wordless screams when the pain became too overwhelming, then forcing out one more “Free Palestine” before losing his words for good. The sound of the cop screaming at him to get on the ground over and over again. The sound of a first responder telling police to stop pointing guns at Bushnell’s burning body and go get fire extinguishers.

He remained standing for an unbelievable amount of time while he was burning. I don’t know where he got the strength to do it. He remained standing long after he’d stopped vocalizing.

Bushnell was taken to the hospital, where independent reporter Talia Jane reports that he has died. It was about as horrific a death as a human being can experience, and it was designed to be. 

Shortly before his final act in this world, Bushnell posted the following message on Facebook:

“Many of us like to ask ourselves, ‘What would I do if I was alive during slavery? Or the Jim Crow South? Or apartheid? What would I do if my country was committing genocide?’ ��The answer is, you’re doing it. Right now.”

Aaron Bushnell has provided his own answer to this challenge. We’re all providing our own right now.

I would never do what Bushnell did, and I would never recommend anyone else does either. That said, I also can’t deny that his action is having its intended effect: drawing attention to the horrors that are happening in Gaza.

I know this is true because everywhere I see Aaron Bushnell being discussed online I see a massive deluge of pro-Israel trolls frantically swarming the comments in a mad rush to manipulate the narrative. They all understand how destructive it is to US and Israeli information interests for people to be seeing an international news story about a member of the US Air Force self-immolating on camera while screaming “Free Palestine”, and they are doing everything they can to mitigate that damage.

As I write this, there are with absolute certainty people digging through Bushnell’s history searching for dirt that can be spun as evidence that he was a bad person, that he was mentally ill, that he was steered astray by pro-Palestine activists and dissident media — whatever they can make stick. If they find something, literally anything, the smearmeisters and propagandists will run with it as far as they can.

That’s what they’re choosing to do at this point in history. That’s what they would have done during slavery, or the Jim Crow south, or apartheid. That’s what they’re doing while their country commits genocide right now. People are showing what they would have done with their response to Gaza, and they’re showing what they would have done with their response to the self-immolation of Aaron Bushnell.

I’m not going to link to the video here; watching it is a personal decision on which you should probably do your own legwork to make sure it’s really what you want. Whether you watch it or not, it happened, just like the incineration of Gaza is happening right now. We each own our personal response to that reality. This is who we are.

#genocide #aaron bushnell #gaza #palestine #us complicity and support for genocide

[bkgpackets]

older bakugou who learns to finish up fights and missions quickly, all with the goal of returning home early to you and your children, despite him having always made fun of his boss for doing the same during his prime days when he was still a sidekick

his shower isn’t at all reaching his standard of the deep cleanse he always does after long and hard missions in far away forests and mountains, the grime and dirt are probably still visible under his neat fingernails, his palms are dry but he didn’t bother taking out his lotion, after five minutes, he’s out of the agency, hair still wet, clothes not fully shoved inside his duffle bag, his steps are fast-paced and hurried, he speed-walks to his porsche in the parking lot

(eijirou watches all of this with a warm smile on his face, however many times he was chastised by a younger bakugou for slacking off for his wife and kids and however many times he answered with ‘you’ll understand one day’ wouldn’t suffice for the absolute smug pride he’s feeling right now, oh how his best friend has grown)

he’s barely going the speed limit on the road, his grip on the steering wheel is firm, the leather familiar in his hold, he’s leaned back, he’s relaxed, because he gets to walk through your home and into your arms soon enough, that all the work he’s done in the past month in okinawa, kilometres away from musutafu was more than worth it

the wheels on his car don’t align with the lines at his parking spot, it’s wonky and sideways but he doesn’t care when he slams the door closed and forgoes his belongings in the car because they’re not going anywhere, but the time he can spend with you and your head tucked in his neck is

he can hear his children’s laughs all the way from the garage, your giggles and light scolding are all but endearing and even from the outsider, it’s visible that he’s no longer fifteen year old, angry and frustrated, the bright grin he has on as his daughters jump in his arms sits comfortably on his mellowed out face, stubble and all

the things older bakugou would do to hear the words ‘welcome home, papa!’ are limitless

his daughters crowd around his legs and gag when he kisses ‘i missed you’ into your lips, your smile is evident throughout, his brats will run off to play with the dog and he will get you all to himself, against the kitchen counter, messy hair and dirtied clothes, bakugou wouldn’t want to be anywhere else

#bakugou headcanons #bakugou x reader #mha bakugou #bnha bakugo katsuki #bakugou katsuki #bakugou x you #bnha bakugou #katsuki bakugo x reader #bakugo katsuki #katsuki bakugou #katsuki bakugo mha #bakugou drabble #bakugou fluff #bakugou x y/n #bakugou katuski x reader #bakugo x reader #bakugo katuski #katsuki x y/n #katsuki x you #sy.katsuki

[halemerry]

On Crowley, memory, and identity.

So full disclosure first, I am not someone who is particularly interested in having Crowley's angel name on screen - personally I rather like the idea of never having an answer to this question - but I also do think it's interesting and fun to speculate and we got quite a few hints at this throughout this season soooo

Obviously part of this is that we meet him. The angel that would become Crowley is the first person on screen this season. We confirm a lot about him here. He confirm that he is powerful enough to start the engine of the universe. We confirm that he can control gravity and time and space and light. We confirm that he is the being that says let there be light before the beginning. We also confirm that he consulted with the concept designer of the universe and that he's very comfortable with the idea of questioning authority. We are also given Aziraphale's anxiety as a contrast to this and as proof that that is not a universal trait for early angels.

Now, we have always had evidence that Crowley is powerful. He's done some things that seem impossibly big. He stops time very casually and seemingly without effort - even at the end of season 1 it doesn't even seem to give us the same strain on him that holding the Bentley together does. This is a thing that we only ever see Crowley do and notably a thing that you would think other beings would mess with to their advantage if it was possible. Which means they either literally can't or that it never occurred to them that they could. Or as is becoming increasingly clear: perhaps it's a bit of both.

But that's not the only implication of power we get in season 1 either. We get Crowley seemingly in tune with the universe in a way many angels and demons aren't. Which, makes some sense if he helped make it. This manifests in all sorts of ways. He's constantly aware of Aziraphale's presence. He can smell when the world state changes like when Adam names Dog. He holds the Bentley together through utter destruction. He notices that there are different books in the bookshop - something I always assumed was meant to convey he was familiar with the shop's contents but after learning he didn't even know Jane Austen was a writer I wonder if it's actually more to do with him being in tune with reality. He also can apparently quite literally feel when there are eyes on them.

We're given even more of all these things this season in some really interesting ways. Crowley literally tests the air to check if a miracle has happened - another thing that we don't see anyone else do despite Heaven literally assigning someone to Aziraphale to check for a specific miracle. This particular beat is also something we are shown twice this season. Both here and in 1941, when Furfur uses the miracle blocker on Aziraphale. Here Crowley tests his miracles and despite getting nothing of the sort when Aziraphale tries a miracle literally the beat before this, we are given both a visual and an auditory effect. It ripples out with a watery sound effect from Crowley's finger. It's like he's prodding at reality.

There's also several instances involving the recognition or lack thereof of angels and demons. Crowley feels that the demon army is arriving before it does. Neither side seems to be able to track Gabriel - one of the most powerful beings in existence - at all once he leaves Heaven. We also see countless angels fail to notice Crowley himself both as Bildad the Shuhite performing literal miracles right in front of them. And this happens again as he prances about Heaven after Muriel. Aziraphale can't tell Shax is a demon despite Crowley recognizing she's manifested behind him nearly as soon as he answers the phone. Aziraphale can't even recognize that he himself is still an angel at the end of the Job story.

He also. Quite literally. Brings someone back from the dead???? Like waves a hand casually on the street and reconstitutes Mr. Brown like he'd never been dead at all. Mr. Brown returns with no memory of what happened to him holding a newspaper that seems to have literal bite chunks coming out of it. It's not framed as a huge miracle or anything strenuous either - just a casual snap.

And that's not even getting into the parallels with Gabriel. First of all. We get the color purple. It's purple when Aziraphale and angel that would become Crowley start the engine of the quadrants of the universe and it's purple when they miracle to hide Gabriel. This color is associated with power and, historically in the language of this show, with Gabriel himself. Them using it together twice speaks a lot to the power they have together.

But that's not the only symbolism historically tied to Gabriel that has found its way to Crowley this season either. Most flashy of all is the lightning. This is how we see Gabriel arrive on earth at the end of season one and it is something Crowley apparently just Does when he gets too mad to contain himself.

This alone wouldn't catch my attention except. Except the way Crowley reacts to Gabriel's memory problems is... interesting to say the least. He's angry and understandably so. Part of this is him being mad and protective of Aziraphale - he says as much himself to Jim directly. And yet, weirdly, it's the kind of mad that reminded me of something else.

This is the mad he tends to gets at his plants. Do it properly. Think hard. You can do better than that. Grow better. It's the kind of angry that's steeped in projection. It's he kind of angry that is undercut with the occasional weird undercurrent of understanding. And so much of his dialogue with Jim around this is framed like he does actually understand. Jim says it hurts and he says he knows. Jim starts talking about it feeling like being an empty house that still remembers where the furniture is and Crowley immediately latches onto this and understands ah it's looking at where the furniture isn't.

And there's a few other conversations that center around this issue that I find really interesting from a projection perspective. There's the conversation that happens when Crowley goes to have an alcohol fueled chat with Jim. He says "You're Jim now. Got everything just the way you wanted?" This doesn't make a whole lot of sense for him to be addressing Gabriel with. As far as he knows all Gabriel would want was the end of the world.

And then there's the particular way he asks Jim to eliminate himself in this scene. Climb out the window. In other words, have a fall. Something he pretty immediately retracts and clearly feels guilty about no matter how much he hates Gabriel.

And then there's the first conversation he gets to have after learning about Gabriel. Crowley opens this conversation, thinking out loud. He's staring out, not talking to Az yet and the very first thing out of his mouth is, of all things: "He's going to be okay." A weird start for a statement about Gabriel in itself but then Crowley goes and adds what at it's core is his own trauma narrative to the end with, "We can just take him somewhere and leave him there."

Now the real fun bit: Crowley also has memory issues that are out very prominently on display even as far back as season 1.

He has inconsistent memories of his Fall. The answers he gives us to why he Fell change slightly - even when he's alone with himself. He doesn't seem to understand why exactly he Fell even though he clearly has some vague idea of the pieces in play. I always thought to some degree that this was just a trauma response, but season 2 drew even more attention to this and now that we know that memory alteration is how Heaven handles powerful angels I can't help but to wonder if there's more in play here.

Crowley can't remember Furfur - who he apparently literally fought next to during the war in Heaven. Crowley can't remember building a nebula with Saraqael. Crowley doesn't remember why they decided gravity was a good idea.

But he does remember bits and pieces here and there. He remembers doing some of the starmaking. He remembers how to access clearance locked files. He's missing pieces and also seems to have an understanding that Gabriel's memories ARE in there. Almost like he's done this work on himself before.

This narrative itself is also far more concerned with the angel Crowley was this time around. It teases his rank a few different times. Most notably is him having access the files only available to Dominions and above.

Now angel hierarchy is a bit of a messy area depending on what sources you're using but given Good Omens tendencies in the past we can assume that this leaves us five ranks. Dominion, Throne, Cherub, Seraph, and Archangel.

I might break down why I think Dominion, Throne, and Cherub feel kind of odd to me later if there's interest - now available here - in that but given the current length of this meta I just want to focus on that last one for now.

Crowley was an Archangel is far from a new theory and I've honestly historically had some fairly mixed feelings about it. But the parallels between Jim and Crowley lend some interesting connective tissue to a lot of those theories. And. There's also some interesting camera work and script writing tied to Crowley and that term outside of the scenes about Gabriel's memories specifically.

Firstly, during Crowley's chat with Beelzebub he says it's a big universe with plenty of places for an archangel to hide. Like Alpha Centauri perhaps?

Then we get Aziraphale and Crowley both presenting Hell and Heaven respectively the idea that it could have been them that did the archangel class miracle. Aziraphale gets scoffed at and yet. Shax is the one who says the miracle was archangel level and Crowley's response is "how do you know I didn't do it?"

Then later as she's prowling about the shop we get this interesting shot of Crowley in the doorframe and Jim in the background. Crowley grins and offers to let Shax look in and see if she can see any archangels in there while he's framed dead center and Jim himself is blurry in the back of the frame.

And most fascinating in my opinion is this shot that happens when Crowley and Muriel are accessing the classified files. Nearly every shot in this sequence is group shots or shots of Gabriel. The camera is focused in the plot and the way the archangels function as a group and on Gabriel himself. But we get one single shot in this entire sequence of Crowley by himself and it is immediately following Gabriel saying "I am the only first order archangel in the room - or, well, the universe."

And then in the end. We get the Metatron who goes out of his way to avoid using Crowley's name. He calls him demon (and insists correctly that Crowley would recognize him even when Michael doesn't) or refers to him as Aziraphale's friend. He only ever uses that name when trying to use him as a bribe for Aziraphale. That combined with the dark look he gives Crowley implies a familiarity that only the Metatron has with him.

So who is he then? There's plenty of old meta out there about why certain archangels fit or don't and I won't reiterate them here. They're interesting and definitely worth poking around at and very fun to read! Personally I'm not as interested in naming the someone he used to be as I am in examining the places that ghost of this angel has started to poke through the narrative so I'll end this here. It's spiralled into something far longer than I ever meant it to be anyway.

#good omens #good omens spoilers #good omens season 2 #gos2 spoilers #good omens meta #Crowley #Gabriel