#that surgeon sucks

[holdmeclosertinytaron]

A little catch up!!

Ahhhh it feels like forever since I've properly posted on here. I promise I'm still alive, life has just been kicking my ass this year and it's been a lot to juggle. So here's a little rundown for you all...

In January I had to have an ultrasound on my abdomen due to intermittent, excruciating pain. Turns out I have gallstones (yay!). The doctor was referring my to general surgery to discuss options which was fine.

In February I had the gallbladder pain bad and wound up bed ridden for five days after unable to eat or drink. I slept continuously for almost 24 hours and my mum was getting worried about me because I started to turn yellow. I'm talking fully minion yellow. So I ended up in A&E where I spent five of the shortest hours of my life waiting to find out what was going on. I was put on a fluids drip because I'd only had 500 ml of water in four days.

I spoke to a lovely surgeon at like 1am who was quite surprised that I knew what she was talking about (thanks Grey's Anatomy for that. You're a real one). She told me that she would like it for me to stay overnight but she knew I wanted to go home so she let me home but made me promise I would go back to the hospital the following day for an MRCP and more blood tests because some of my levels were really high.

I got a call the next day telling me that my scan had been scheduled for the following morning so to take the day to rest and that I didn't need to go in. I still wasn't eating or drinking. I wasn't hungry and I was so exhausted it was awful.

I had the scan and then I went to the surgical same day emergency care department where I had blood drawn and had to wait for an hour for results. I was finally starting to get thirsty but I couldn't have a drink of anything in case I needed emergency surgery. A doctor came to speak to me and he said I had more gallstones than they first thought but they were no longer blocking a duct like they were before so I could go home. I just had to go back again the day after for another blood test to make sure my bilirubin and haemoglobin levels had sorted themselves out. Fun.

The following day I went back and had even more blood drawn. Before this whole ordeal I was petrified of needles. Now I just give them my arm and tell them to go to town. I was allowed to drink that time so a nurse made me the worst cup of tea of my life, bless her. Not her fault, the teabags they use at the hospital aren't the ones I'm used to. That's besides the point.

Another doctor came to speak to me and asked me how I was doing. I told him I felt fine again and as though nothing had happened. He was glad I was feeling better and said as long as my levels had dropped he was happy to sign me off and let me wait for general surgery to get in touch with me.

My levels had dropped enough to go home!!

A couple of weeks later I got a letter from general surgery with an appointment for the 4th of April. Perfect. My fear of hospitals was no more because I'd been so much bad in February so off I went with my mum to this appointment with a consultant.

What a laugh that was. Throughout this whole thing, my weight hadn't been mentioned once. I had only dealt with one male doctor at this point too and that was a phone call to tell me I had gallstones. Every other doctor, nurse and surgeon I'd spoken to were women and not one of them mentioned my weight.

Now I know I'm overweight. It isn't a secret. I am fat. But to have a surgeon look at you and talk to you for fifteen minutes about your weight, while looking at your mum instead of you, that shit is awful. He didn't know why I was there. He thought I'd been rushed through from the GP for surgery asap (I thought I was getting surgery asap too).

For a whole twenty minutes he said I would need to be referred back to my GP and put on a weight loss programme otherwise I couldn't have the surgery and that waiting for surgery is dangerous because of how easily a stone can block a duct and such. He then proceeded to make it sound as if he thought I would find it difficult to cut out 'nice things'. I made him acutely aware that since I had been in the hospital, I had eaten fresh, lean meat everyday with potatoes and vegetables. I have cut out pretty much all fat from my diet and happily sat back while everyone else in the house has had chocolate.

I don't find cutting things out of my diet hard. I find it hard to be sitting in front of a man telling me that I have to go on a weight reduction programme and that it will take hard work and dedication, as though I don't know what they mean.

Said consultant sent me for even more bloods to make sure my liver function is okay which I totally get. And then he referred me back to the GP so they can refer me to this programme which could take months.

All the while I still have gallstones that could cause pain at any given time. I have no clue when I'm getting surgery so I have to live with this for however long, not knowing when it's going to strike and eating the most boring foods with no fun snacks.

It is debilitating living life not knowing when you're going to be in the worst pain of your life. I wouldn't wish gallstone/gallbladder pain on my worst enemy it is hell. It comes on suddenly with absolutely no warning and it can last anywhere from an hour to five hours. I have to sit with two hot water bottles, one on my front and one on my back, and not move. It makes me throw up, it makes me sob uncontrollably, and it makes me feel like such a failure.

So that's why I've been quiet recently. I've been dealing with lots of health things and have been spending more time trying to focus on me than anything else. HOWEVER, these past two days have been spent working tirelessly with my angel @brayndilyn to write some of the big fic coming this year. I can't wait to share it with you!! We love it and we hope you do too.

#That was a long ass post #sorry!! #Life update #health update #gallbladder pain sucks #that surgeon sucks #everything sucks #but at least I'm not afraid of needles anymore #that's something #the surgeon who I spoke to in a&e also like Grey's and reading so we had such a fun chat #she made me a diagram of the gallbladder and my liver and it's somewhere in my room #i kept it because it was cool and she treated me like a person which was refreshing

[zeebreezin]

I haven’t been able to write much recently because of exams, but good lord, Dr. Laurence Frost is such a guy. Like, his situation is horrific, right. He’s living a psychological horror story but does not recognize that whatsoever. There’s some real shit going on with him because I really want to capture how cults actually work, especially on the ways they prey on vulnerable people - and despite him objectively being a pretty terrible person in his own right I wanna make sure I capture the nuances of his situation accurately.

However, and this is really important: he’s also fucking hilarious.

Imagine having resting bitchface so severe even the dawn machine leaves you the definition of -_- <- having a great time. He invented a genuinely impressive treatment for migraine headaches out of love & devotion and then immediately used that same formula to torture rebels. Despite being an utter shell of grief at the time he was still a decent guardian to Bev. He let Bev play with matches. And chemicals. He’s the only man on this Geode with a smidge of self awareness. His gift for Vincent’s stag party was cosmogone laced cocaine. Vincent chose him to be the godfather of his child. His closest direct inspiration is the fucking 300% fatality surgery guy. He works two jobs. Canonically he has no friends. I love him.

#zeeposting #the hell scarred surgeon #the gregarious commander #officer beverley #you have to understand how funny this man is to me #like yes he got sucked into a cult by the only person who provided him kindness #during the worst time in his life #and then found out years later that he had been stalked & all their coincidences had been planned long in advance #but at that point he just kinda went ‘that doesn’t change anything I love you’ #but. like. #holy shit he’s funny.

[qeyond]

Beyond…..dentist…..please…..I am decomposing

"oh the decor? I actually did it all by myself, can you tell? I took a color theory course in college."

The framed photo is actually from his own personal collection! He thought adding the motivational posters and the "rest in peace" would help calm patients. :) He's very proud, please don't be rude.

#qeyond sucks #beyond birthday #death note #rest in pieces more like #hes like 'theyre health posters i thought theyd fit perfectly!' #it took me a while to think of what I could do for this request and i thought of the #color theory childrens hospital meme and i knew #i just knew he would have that #I also considered something along the lines of naomi going in for a check up #and it being B and hes sooooo excited to see her and she is absolutely horrified #'u put your hands anywhere near my teeth and ill round house kick your face' #anyway hes actually a dental surgeon and takes the teeth home :)) #anon i hope this is what you wanted :3 #hes actually very good but he enjoys it a bit too much #thus the 'collection' of giant teeth photos #hes a professional!! he can have framed art!! #nothing weird here!! #also his crocs are in sport mode so he can catch up to anyone that bolts #he explains to them when he catches them that he knows color theory might be new to some people but its real :) #it works :) red is calming :) a very calming color! :) #also do not talk to me about perspective i hate her i did 3 years of design college before i decided i would rather die in a glue trap #q art

[neurotypical-sonic]

me n my hang ups about things being "realistic". maam this is about a talking blue hedgehog who runs at super sonic speeds you can break the rules a little

#BUT REALISM..... things have to be Right overwise my brain screams #anyways. i dont think if sonic had top surgery youd be to see scars from it #surgeons usually try to make it so theres minimal scarring as possible + plus the fur would cover it/make it harder to see #'oh but you've drawn him with other scars before' scars from trauma are often worse/more noticeable than scars that are Planned #also I do think he has a bunch of scars that arent visible #I'm not sitting on people who do draw him with top surgery scars I Love To See It #its just oj my mind and also Im bored trying to get home. public transport sucks. lots of waiting around and its dark and im cold :( #egg.txt

[parallasso]

FUCKING FINALLY!!! i have been referred to a surgeon and hopefully insurance will approve it otherwise i explode and die

#apparently this surgeon is a tertiary level provider whatever that means #but if theres someone else then they might just redirect me to them #which would suck cause i kind of like being able to choose who tf im going to but whatever idk #im finally making fucking progress #anyways heres the update for everyone whos definitely so intently following the horrible story that is my attempt at getting top surgery

[hajihiko]

if Hajime is the ultimate brain surgeon or whatever that guy was who kamakura'd him

He could, potentially, remake Izuru right? In the sense of, he has the technical knowledge to wipe someone's brain and stuff it with abilities.

He'd NEVER do it obviously because it's inhumane and wrong and it really sucked when he went through it himself, but like he could.

#Good thing he's the Best At Everything bc I can only imagine some people really wanna use him #Wonder if it sucks to sort of know exactly what was done to lobotomize and reconstruct you #What if brain surgeon guy managed to repeat the procedure. Create the only person in the world that can go up against Hajime #Stuff I'm thinkin bout #Not an art

[magstorrn]

about to leave a scathing review for a historical fiction book on goodreads (felt so strongly about it i made an account for the first time) then chickening out once i realised i'd put down my full name and i dont want to offend the author TOO much in case we end up working in the same field as historians

#missives #i admire her a lot too which sucks but holy shit. this book is bad its SO bad #maybe i'll post my review here just to get it out of my system #in essence its a book about a real historical figure but shes written in this way where literally all she ever does is serve men #and have babies continuously #and we're meant to believe she's fallen in love with her dropkick of a husband who does fuck all and is constantly abroad #and like. of course i can believe that's how some women were especially given their religious inclinations #but i could feel the feminism leaving my body the longer i read the book like it is that bad i felt like i was being brainwashed #it starts good like it goes into her childhood and relationship with her siblings #but then she just turns into her husband's mother essentially and its so revolting. and it doesnt even feel authentic? like #none of these people feel like real people. they dont fight they dont have nasty thoughts they are so fucking sanitised #i dont know what i expected.jpeg #and this woman is a historian!! she has a phd!! #yet she gets basic things wrong to an immersion-breaking degree #the whole thing is set during the civil wars but she NEVER talks about there being surgeons i have not seen a single mention of a surgeon #shes always referring to doctors and physicians but it's becoming apparent to me that when she says physician #shes just using it as an old timey word for doctor not because she properly understands the 17th century medical hierarchy #fucking hell. im so mad

[gr33nmushy]

Inktober day 4 "Dodge"

Not the best so far. I have to admit I found it really hard to come up with an idea. Then I couldnt make a sketch good enough and was a little disappointed but eh. It's fine.

#mu5h7 #gr33nmushy #art #artist #sketches #traditional art #dodge #law #trafalgar law one piece #one piece law #law one piece #trafalgar law #law trafalgar #surgeon of death #inktober #ink #inktober2023 #graphic #inking #i suck at this #haki

[bunnihearted]

.

#im just so sick of doing and feeling bad #im stressed af for my schoolwork. bc all my energy goes to dealing w my anxiety and i barely have energy to do my work #i NEED to talk to someone bc im doing so so bad. but i've contacted my healthcare center & the psychiatric #but everyone just sends me on to the next place bc they cant help me :// so now im stuck waiting for this new clinic to contact me. #and with my health issue.... i need to wait up to 3 months to get an appt with a surgeon. then wait 3 months for a surgery appt #i might not get rid of my gallstones problem until april next year ._. #and bc of my gallstones i cant eat much at all. so im losing sm weight. #im actually so worried abt it bc i already feel weak and tired. and dizzy and ice cold. i will literally turn into a skeleton.... #and like it feels so lonely when i realize nobody cares. i contacted my healthcare center and said i was worried and dont know what to do #but all they said was 'yeah... u just gotta wait' #so... i need to prepare that i wont be able to eat or drink for another 6 months before surgery :D #this next phase in my life is gonna suck so fkn bad and idk how to get thru it #i just wanna feel ok. have energy. be able to eat and drink whatever i want. not be in pain. i wanna move forward not be sick

[citriarchive]

i can't quite put it into words but i think yaevinn is the kind of editor who zooms in on nithral's nose any time he specifically says the phrase "who knows" and that's it. like even if it's not often it's often enough that it gets compilations. like his editing style is so obviously not nithral at all. there is so clearly someone else doing it and that someone probably occasionally boops nithral's nose. does that make sense. is this anything.

#; the citrus speaks #; healing hands #thinking about content creator/influencer au again #i think yaevinn does slowly but surely get better and better at editing but still keeps it a little Quirky™ bc it's the brand atp #but even when he sucks/sucked he has ALWAYS done the nose thing #also i think nithral should play surgeon simulator and i think yaevinn should be there for emotional support #because til that the fucking surgeon in that game straight up doesn't wear gloves #come to think of it i don't even think they gowned???? #did they even scrub???????? #WHY AM I NOTICING THESE THINGS IM NOT THE DOCTOR #; lemon's inane ramblings

[unsanedes]

Born Evil - Theo Graphic Edit

I made another graphic edit featuring Theo! I don't know if I've ever made a graphic edit without Theo actually.

Point is: here it is!

I spent two hours editing this because I changed my mind (I was forced to when my original "idea" wasn't working) halfway through and went a different direction.

In terms of the edit itself, I chose to prioritize The Surgeon as the Dread Doctor in this because I've always headcanon'd that Theo has a better (and worse) connection to him. Like The Surgeon picked Theo and Theo's failure to become the Beast was ultimately shared between them.

There's no doubt that Theo was traumatized and influenced by all of the Dreadies, but it really feels like he "looked up" to The Surgeon the most.

#maybe Theo wanted to be a surgeon after meeting The Surgeon #that being said #all of the Dreadies ruined Theo's childhood #so they all suck #even if their outfits are hot af #teen wolf #theo raeken #fanart #teen wolf fanart

[stoned-ratpack]

God please give me strength cause I swear if I have to deal with my white neurotypical ass mom calling my autism a “superpower” one more time I’m gonna commit a crime

#it’s like girl no the FUCK it isn’t #it’s just a condition that changes how my brain functions and it often sucks ass #I am NOT a surgeon theres no miracles here

[corvidaedream]

ive got a check in w my gender specialist in a month and i was kinda unsure about my Goals™️ at the first appt, just like. here's what i don't want to look like anymore, and i want to look more gender-neutral, but all of my People I Wanna Look Like seemed so unattainable as goals (they were!)

but i am realizing now, all along, my goals should have been to look like a slightly-less-masculine version of jack black as dewey in school of rock

#messages from the ouija board #i was thinking actually about my hair and realized it wouldnt be that hard w a little product to get that look w it #and then everything clicked #im also thinking about top surgery more bc ive been like. on the fence and still am bc 1. medical debt sucks #but also 2. i feel like a completely flat chest would look very weird on me like. cis men my size arent usually totally flat chested #& i want the ability to go back and forth wrt presentation #but a coworker who is also nb just got back from top surgery medical leave and got really specific w their surgeon about exactly that #and it looks great so im like. ok there are options.

[dkettchen]

inspired by the usual spiel at my endo appointment today

#trans #transmasc #hrt #meme #homemade memes #hysterectomy's not happening anytime soon yet but I'm requesting it at my next main line appointment #which will be in the next few months cause waiting lists SUCK as usual (had my last one last summer -.-) #but alas we're not in a hurry #also I finally found a good surgeon for my FMS! #so that'll be happening in the next like 3 (fingers crossed) months :D #(and should not bankrupt me completely so that's good)

[brainfondue]

Looking at venom snake fascinated they really gave him some A+ dick sucking lips

#big boss doesnt strike me as the type to suck dick and less to have such lips #therefore the plastic surgeon musta have decided to not deprive venom of his best facial asset #and just lied to everyone else and said he accidently injected something. to his lips. #brain storms

[anxious-anomaly]

[ 18+ blog || minors DNI ]

Drugs are so nice. The prescribed ones I have relaxed me to the point its almost like my (legal) edibles. So chill, so tired, so pliable - probably a lot more sensitive too now that head empty, thoughts null.

I really wanna have some fun when I'm like this. Take advantage of my lack of strength and pin me down, watch as I melt when you mark my neck with kisses, hickies, and bites. Grope at my chest and dick and listen as my breath stutters, silent exhales slowly turning to low moans.

Get me horny enough and I might start to get desperate for you to be inside. It'd feel so good to have a dick in that bonus hole, especially when mine is hard and craving company.

#nsft #nsft thoughts #mlm nsft #ftm nsft #intox kink #drug kink #im really drugged up rn i had to take my anxietybegone meds bc tomorrow is the consultation with possible top surgery surgeon #i really really hope it works out and easy and maybe even my insurance covers it bc im too broke to afford anything anymore #fuck plz let tomorrow work out i need these sacks of fat GONE i wanna walk n run around without being weighed down n dysphoric all the time #i really hope insurance covers it bc otherwise i might need to exit stealth mode on main just to try and get enough money and fuck #thats really something id rather avoid #... im totally clueless on how to make money #being unable to get a job sucks ass