Smeraldo: the Notes and Webtoon Theory
overall: so bighit started dropping quite a fair bit of Smeraldo notes started posting out of nowehere on 7th Jan, on a Monday to say that there would be about 15 notes to be released. some dates overlapping with the previous ones that have been revealed in the album notes, highlight reels etc and notes released individually later on. sooner or later, the webtoon is also released on 15 Jan which is expected to end on April 11. the day when Seokjin keeps going back in time; or at least when he goes back in time, it just so happens to be April 11.
warning(s): mentions of death, mental illnesses, abuse, suicide, violence; please do read with care
do support my ko-fi if you can~
theory: generally, you would have realized that bighit is planning something to which they are dropping the Notes (The most beautiful moment in life pt.1) whereas the webtoon is pt.2, and knowing them, there would most likely be a pt.2. this is to which someone mentioned on Twitter that there could be a possibly that pt.2 would be movie and that bight was just testing the responses if bighit does release one for this story. notice how bighit released 2 movies, burn the stage and ly in seoul so you could say this was a marketing practice for them.
but anyway, bighit drops snippets of the notes for 15 consecutive days. i have no idea why 15, but moving on, it seemed like a lot was planned this year considering that the year 2013; the year that bangtan debuted, and this year 2019, is exactly identical, freaky but still.
to get yourself more familiarize with what I'm about to talk about, please do look at my masterlist here for the full translations, possibly highlight reel posters and watch the highlight reels.
someone on Twitter ( user @/jmxyg ) also mentioned that she did some research to find out that these videos are the ones certified in the Bighit Universe. (BU)
I NEED U
화양연화 on stage: prologue
RUN
Blood, Sweat and Tears
Wings Short Films
Highlight Reels 起承轉結
Euphoria
Fake Love
Epiphany
im going to go on a limb here and say that in all of these videos, it shows bangtan together, all except for Epiphany. Epiphany seems to the beginning or the end of which Seokjin tries to go back into time to help them.
but anyway, notice how critical intros didnt make the cut? such as serendipity and singularity, i do think that they are part of the BU but it wasn't of much significance, it shows more of their relationships with their partners or of their inner struggles and has nothing to do with the HYYH storyline at all; hence why it is being cut out.
Euphoria was kept because it kinda of showed a whole alternate universe that i mentioned before in Euphoria theory; do give that a read if keen. it showed sort of alternate endings in which it could be said as though Seokjin successfully went back in time but the pain has been transferred to someone else.
also notice how none of the earlier eras of bangtan before the most beautiful moment in life are part of it, such as no more dream, N.O. Skool luv affair or dark and wild, so in a way they are just of background information since it talks mostly about school rebellion; to which to some extent is being covered in HYYH: the Notes, but is not of that importance.
the only one that was important is the BTS Begins VCR with the storage classroom and of the quote inside. (read 1984 theory).
but also notice, how the the japanese music videos are not part of it, guess they are only focusing on the Korean timelines for now, but i do believe that the Japanese ones are of a different world etc.
so let’s start start on identifying the various dates that has been mentioned. This includes various years at various timings. If you read my previous theory here; I have outlined overlapping dates for certain members as well.
so I'm going to just go out here and start putting each and every single note that bighit posted.
So every time that smeraldo notes posted a note, they would acompany it with the relevant video in which I assume that’s where the note came from.
1st Note:
Seokjin
2 May YEAR 22
“Would I be able to straighten out the errors and mistakes and save the others? I didn’t grasp the depth and weight of this question.
Video posted is the one from Euphoria; where Seokjin opens the curtains.
2nd Note:
Yoongi
7 April YEAR 22
The car had just barely missed me. The remaining buzz of the alcohol made me giddy. Then I realized I couldn’t hear the piano anymore.
Video posted is from First Love, wings short films. Yoongi just avoided the car from barely hitting and crashing into him.
this could also be seen from the HYYH: the Notes, O version.
Yoongi
7 April YEAR 22
I came to a stop after hearing the sound of a piano. The only sound that could be heard at the empty construction site was someone popping an oil drum. I knew the sound of the song that I had just played, but why did I think of that? My drunken footsteps stumbled. I closed my eyes and walked even more carelessly. As the heat of the fire grew stronger, the piano sound, the night air, the drunkenness fading away.
I opened my eyes at the sound of horn as a car grazed dangerously past me. In the confusion of the blazing headlight, the wind of the car’s passing and my drunkenness, I stumbled helplessly. I could hear the curses of the driver. As I came to a stop to curse back, I could no longer hear the sound of the piano. In spite of the sound of the blazing fire, the wind and the silence left after the car, the piano sound was gone. It stopped. Why did it stop? Who was playing the piano?
The sparks from the fire picked up its pace towards the oil barrel with one sound together. I could only look at the scene blankly. My face became flushed. Bang, it was at that moment when I heard a fist slamming on the piano keys. Instinctively, I looked behind. For a moment, my blood rushed that my breathing became uneven. The nightmares that I had when I was young. That was where I heard the sound.
The next moment, I was running. It wasn’t of my own will that I ran towards the music shop and instinctively looked behind. This was something like I had done numerous times. It was a feeling that I had forgotten something important.
The music store had a broken window. In front of the piano, someone was sitting there. It had been a few years yet I still recognized the person. The person was crying, fists being clenched. I didn’t want to be concerned with anyone’s life. I didn’t want to comfort anyone who was lonely. I didn’t want to mean anything to someone. I couldn’t protect the person and I had no confidence. Until the end, I had no confidence. I didn’t want to give pain. I didn’t want to receive pain.
I slowly moved. I wanted to go back but before I know it, I started approaching the person. Just then a wrong note was heard. Jungkook lifted his head and looked at me. “Hyung”. This had been our first meeting since quitting high school.
it looks like during this day, Jungkook met drunk Yoongi
3rdNote:
Namjoon
11 April YEAR 22
Seokjin just stood there on the edge of my sight. He didn’t come closer or start talking.
The video posted on twitter is of a separate video but actually it came from the BST JP. MV; interesting that remember how I mentioned that someone tweeted that there are videos being compiled as part of the BU, yet none of the Japanese ones were inside.
To make up for this and to ensure the smooth storyline, they made, trademarked and posted a separate video to go with these notes.
This scene would be familiar to those who read the webtoon “Save Me”; in which Seokjin does appear at the gas station; yet the only difference is whether Seokjin spoke to Namjoon as it lead to a whole ripple of effects.
4th Note:
Jungkook
11 April YEAR 22
My phone rang, I came back to myself as if awakened from a long dream. I took out my phone. It was Yoongi.
The video posted was that of Euphoria; the scene in which Jungkook is at the roof of the building and if correct; it was said he would jump off the building and die.
Same thing happened in the webtoon; yet the only difference is whether he jumped off and crashed onto Seokjin’s car or not.
5th Note:
Hoseok
23 July YEAR 10
Mom handed me a chocolate bar. “Hoseok, close your eyes tight and don’t open them until you count to ten.”
The video posted was the one from the highlight reel; where he was seen at an amusement park to which his mother abandoned him. Do read my fake love theory on this to understand it clearly.
This is where Hoseok faces his fear of abandonment; through which he relishes through the snickers candy bar and tried to trade it at the magic shop. (read Fake Love Teaser 1 Theory).
moreover, there is some relation in terms of HYYH: the Notes, L version.
Hoseok
31 May YEAR 22
I reflexively turned my gaze away from the breathtaking wind. After dancing for a long time, often, I am out of breath but it is not that context. I thought I was similar to my mother. No, it wasn’t a thought or a perception, it couldn’t be described or explained. I couldn’t look at the face of my friend that I had known for 10 years already. We learned dance together, failed together, been frustrated and gained strength together. We slumped to the floor that was covered in sweat, we threw towels at each other and cracked jokes. It felt like a bothering sensation that I hadn’t felt in a while, and I hurriedly stood up. As soon as I reached the corner, I leaned back against the wall and stood there. I made an effort to calm my breathing. I could hear, “Where are you going, Hoseok-ah?” The voice. Nevertheless, I thought it could have been a voice. The voice calling, “Hoseok-ah”. A voice that I couldn’t recall now. It was a voice that brought me back to when I was nine years old.
so here, at YEAR 10, Hoseok was 9 years old, that means in YEAR 22, he would be 21, and assuming their real life age holds, their ages goes like this.
Seokjin - 23
Yoongi - 22
Hoseok - 21
Namjoon - 21
Jimin - 20
Taehyung - 20
Jungkook - 18.
this would make a lot of sense because in the webtoon, it could be seen that Jungkook is still going to high school and following the Korean education system, when they are 18, it is their last year of high school; meaning Jungkook met the boys possibly during the 1st or 2nd year of high school. this is why he probably grew attached to them; especially during the times in the storage classroom.
6th note:
Jimin
28 September YEAR 20
I lied for the first time today. I looked into the doctor’s eyes and pretended to be depressed. “I can’t remember anything.”
The video posted with this is the one of Jimin in his Lie short film. He is seen to be in an isolated room with a Bob Ross painting and he stares into the camera and gives this nonchalant look.
Until now, many have speculated why would there be a need for Jimin to lie considering he already has some kind of illness that caused him to move schools quite frequently when he was young etc. Also, the scene in Euphoria in which as though he seemed to be alone yet sometimes the boys are there probably visiting him etc.
Some armys on twitter have speculated saying that the reason why Jimin lied was to stay in the hospital even longer so that he could be with Hoseok. As mentioned before, Hoseok has some kind of disease and turns out later through these notes, it is revealed he has more than one illness.
the full one could be seen here from the HYYH: the Notes, O version.
Jimin
28 September YEAR 20
I stopped counting the days since I was hospitalized. Counting is something you would do when you want to get out or there is hope of getting out. The trees and leaves were far outside the window and based on the clothes of people, I think that not much time has passed. At most, a month tops. Sometimes I see myself wearing the uniform though it was nothing special. Maybe it was because of the medicine, everything looked boring and dull. But today was a special day. The kind of day you write in a diary. However, I didn’t have one and I didn’t want the problems that come with writing in one. Today was the first time I lied. I looked at the doctor’s eyes and pretended to be gloomy. “I don’t remember anything.”
7thnote:
Yoongi
2 May YEAR 22
The sheet caught fire and instantly flared up. My last sight of this world was this dirty, isolated room, the red-hot flames and rolling heat, and Jungkook’s twisted face.
See here, the video posted was the one from I Need U, in which he set the whole room on fire. But if what im assuming is correct and if what the notes say it’s true, there’s a possibility that Euphoria’s scenes in which Jungkook tried to save Yoongi; the one where Seokjin sees across the window when he opened up the curtain.
Or, there’s another possibility in which what the notes say is of Yoongi’s imagination; in a way he just imagined Jungkook’s twisted face appearing right in front of him and that is assuming he is going to die etc; since mentioned in the Magic Shop book that at times of death; faces of those beloved would appear to them; and if this happens means that Yoongi did die in the end; nobody saved him.
The part of Jungkook’s twisted face makes me realise that Yoongi must have betrayed him or something to the extent that Jungkook gave a twisted face. Please know that Jungkook and Yoongi are of the original pairing as well from the very beginning.
8th note:
Hoseok
10 May YEAR 22
My narcolepsy occurred anytime, anywhere. I always ended up having dreams about Mom when I blacked out. The dreams were all alike. I was heading somewhere with Mom on a bus.
The video posted with this was when Hoseok blacked out along the expressway in I Need U; see many thought he overdosed on pills but little did we know that he was taking those pills as medication but he also had narcolepsy which caused him to faint and black out often.
narcolepsy = a condition characterized by an extreme tendency to fall asleep whenever in relaxing surroundings.
Reference
so, taking this into account along with Hoseok’s Munchausen’s disease which was already revealed in Mama.
Munchausen syndrome is a factitious disorder, a mental disorder in which a person repeatedly and deliberately acts as if he or she has a physical or mental illness when he or she is not really sick. Munchausen syndrome is considered a mental illness because it is associated with severe emotional difficulties.
Reference
now im thinking, there’s a possibility Hoseok has this in order to stay with Jimin in the hospital but his prime illness is the narcolepsy in which he blacks out and falls asleep.
9th Note:
Taehyung
20 May YEAR 22
I wanted to kill myself instead of Dad. If i could, i wanted to drop dead right then and there.
the accompanying video is that of Taehyung and Hoseok in the room with my guess, Taehyung’s younger sister, to which he was covered in blood. this came from Euphoria, and if this occurred, it meant that Seokjin was able to save Taehyung from killing his own father, and that the HYYH timeline has changed as mentioned in my Euphoria theory.
see, this is a different parallel to what the webtoon posted; in which originally Namjoon was jailed because Seokjin didnt interact with him as such, hence why he was unable to pick up the phone call from Taehyung when he stabbed his father. This is why he was arrested; I'm assuming for the murder and not for graffiti.
but now instead of Taehyung being arrested, he is saved in a way, that he won't be going to jail and that upon interacting with Namjoon, he is not in jail right now; sort of saving him as well.
10th Note:
Jimin
15 May YEAR 22
“Run, Jimin.” We all started running. I was caught up in the excitement and ran with them. The snacks and plastic soda bottles flew in the air.
the video posted together is the scene of the boys in Euphoria in the cafeteria. see, here, I'm assuming the boys do visit Jimin in the hospital yet whether or not they knew of his condition, that I am unsure of.
however, in HYYH: the Notes, it seemed as though Yoongi knew of his illness aside from Hoseok.
yet, there is a possibility since because of Jimin’s illness is still roughly unknown, he might be hallucinating about these memories, it’s a possibility.
11th Note:
Jungkook
22 May YEAR 22
At some point, we were all running along the coastal road. I was out of breath, sweaty, and had a splitting headache. But I didn’t stop because they continued on.
the video posted showed the scene of Jungkook walking along and running along to which the rest of the boys followed. I felt as though you could feel the real brotherhood here.
12th Note:
Taehyung
22 May YEAR 22
It was like the last scene in my dream. The only difference was that Seokjin was up there instead of me.
the video posted was that in the Euphoria; in which Taehyung and Seokjin switched places. instead of Taehyung committing suicide, Seokjin did.
interesting that the events sort of changed here, i mean although we know they are from different videos, bighit has decided to string something else instead now, from Jungkook in INU running along to how Seokjin would sacrifice himself on the same day; this is not the same timeline but i guess bighit is forcing it to be since now they allocated years.
yet, in the original HYYH: the Notes, this happened,
Taehyung
22 May YEAR 22
I passed by a pine tree forest as Hyung picked up a phone call and started to lag behind. Nowadays, there were more times like this. He moved far away so that he could pick up the call where others couldn’t eavesdrop. I deliberately slowed down ad hid myself off towards the ocean. Hyung wouldn’t be able to see me when he passed by. “He’s only one year younger than me. No, I don’t really care. Anyway, I’m not going to be the one taking the responsibility, just do whatever is best.”
Something cold slithered down my spine. It felt as if everything in the world crumbled and crashed with a bang. It felt as if I was floating alone in the deep ocean. It was scary and frightening. I was miserable and insignificant. I was angry. I couldn’t contain my anger. I wanted to cause a scene. I wanted to smash something, to hit something, to wreck myself. I was always afraid. That my father’s blood would run in me. I thought that maybe his violence was what I inherited. It seemed that something was stabbing my tight defenses.
it seemed as though Taehyung was in trouble and most likely Namjoon or Seokjin is on the phone with someone and they're trying to prevent Taehyung from going into jail but the fact that he needs to own up to his mistakes etc.
possibly, this might be where everything spiraled down and not just on April 11. yet if you look at the Smeraldo notes that was being posted recently, it follows the one of Euphoria, so as to which one is correct or if it’s in sequence, nobody knows.
it is possibly if these events happened one after another.
Yoongi
8 June Year 22
I took off my t-shirt again. I looked in the mirror and it was not like me at all. The cotton shirt that was not my type had the word ‘Dream’ on it. No matter how you look at it, the red colour, the word, dream, the shirt didn’t fit me at all. Out of frustration, I pulled a cigarette and looked for my lighter. Since it wasn’t in the back pocket of my jeans, I looked inside my bag. (They) took it away. (They) took it from my hands without any constraint. (They) threw back to me were candy bars and this t-shirt.
I messed up my hair and stood up when I heard the sound of a message. My heart began to beat faster as at the moment, my hand phone screen lit up brightly with a name that was 3 syllabuses. I broke my cigarette to check the message. In the next moment, I was laughing at the mirror. Wearing the tight t-shirt that had ‘Dream’ written on it, the red colour, I must have looked like an idiot.
here, it seemed as though Yoongi goes under rehabilitation, mostly the juvenile one since he is still in his early 20s but for what, no one knows.
13th Note:
Namjoon
13 July YEAR 22
Several days ago, I’d been here and seen some graffiti. I’d automatically looked around, but Taehyung had been nowhere in sight. I stared at the graffiti painted all over the wall for a while.
the video posted was the one from highlight reels, in which Namjoon got off a bus stop to find the Save Me, I’m Fine graffiti on.
i am not sure whether this is the same bus stop that keeps on appearing in Namjoon’s HYYH: the Notes but it’s worth a shot.
14th Note:
Seokjin
30 August YEAR 22
The bouquet of Smeraldo flowers fell from my hand. She was lying in the middle of the road. Dark red blood flowed down the road.
the video posted was the one from the highlight reel. sad to say that she was hit by a car as she rushed to meet Seokjin on the other side of the road. in all honesty, I still have no idea who these girls are being part of the highlight reel because originally they are not part of the story which was focused on brotherhood but i guess when they expanded to do other eras, they had to include it somehow in the story.
yet interesting, based on the HYYH: the Notes, L version, this occurred roughly 2 weeks before.
Seokjin
15 August YEAR 22
After coming out of the busy intersection, I came to an abrupt stop as I was about to pick up speed. The car behind me blared its horn and someone spat out curses yet it went unheard in the noise of the city. I took a right turn to an alley corner to see a florist shop. The shop didn’t seem to be opened yet. It wasn’t that I suddenly saw the store but rather it was if I discovered it afterwards. Inside the florist shop, there was construction still being done and the owner was organizing his documents. At that time, I had no real expectations. I had already travelled to several places, but not one florist knew of the flower’s existence. I could see a flower that had similar colours. However, I wasn’t looking for a flower with similar colours. The flowers had to be real. The owner looked at me for quite a bit when he heard the name of the flower and said that the florist shop isn’t officially open but he could deliver it to me. “Why do you need this flower?” I thought about it again as I turned the handle and got back on the road. I have a reason for needing that flower. There is only one reason. I want to make the person I give it to happy. I want to make the person smile. I want to be seen as a good person. I want to be a good person.
this was where if you checked the Smeraldo blog post number 8 here, the florist mentioned how someone was looking to order a bouquet of the Smeraldo flowers, to which in this case I'm assuming Seokjin wanted to get to give to the girl yet when he wanted to, as based on the highlight reel, she ended up being hit by a car/vehicle.
15th Note:
Jungkook
22 May YEAR 22
I didnt tell anyone, but I felt on that long-ago day that I had finally found a real family. Real brothers.
the video posted was the one from Euphoria, instead of Jungkook in the INU clothes, they are in pure white, but are at the same place. true family; truebrothers.
this line is where it hits home.
but anyway, time to organize the dates now, so there a lot of overlapping dates but all occurring in YEAR 22; the year in which I believe Seokjin begins to travel back in time to save the boys.
if you see based on the 15th note, it is pretty clear that all the boys are still there and alive but whether or not they are happy is another question.
basically, the 5th and 6th note, is just background information on the boys but the more important ones are all happening in YEAR 22.
so it starts off with how Yoongi was almost killed in an accident, most likely because he was drunk and on the road on 7 April.
Yet, on 11 April, the day to which Seokjin keeps going back in time, Seokjin tries to save Namjoon and does so by interacting with him at the gas station. not like the first time in which Seokjin didnt even bother to make conversation or small talk with him.
On the same day, Jungkook attempted to commit suicide by being on top of the building but was saved by Yoongi calling him on the phone.
now, looking at Hoseok’s notes.
2 March YEAR 22
I liked being among people. When I left the orphanage, I worked part time at a fast food restaurant, having a knack of making others smile while I work. I liked that kind of work. Actually, in my life, there were very few reasons for me to laugh or to be cheerful. It’s clear that I’ve seen more bad people than the good ones. Maybe that’s the reason why I liked the job. If I smiled brightly, spoke loudly and reacted cheerfully, I could pretend, even to myself, that I felt that way, even if it was deliberately done by me. My mood improved when I laughed loudly, and when I treated people kindly, I became a kind person. Yet, there were hard days as well. After cleaning the store and going back home, even taking a step was difficult. There days filled with fussy customers too. But even so, it was easier to hold it in because of my friends back then, as compared to now.
Sometimes I thought of my friends when I look at the store packed with customers. Seokjin Hyung who transferred schools without saying anything, Namjoon, who disappeared one morning, Yoongi Hyung who was expelled and won’t pick up my calls, Taehyung, who knows, where or what kind of accident is he possibly in now, and Jimin, who never returned to school and the last time I saw him was at the emergency room. I had seen Jungkook wearing the school uniform a few times through the window, but he never visited the store. I wondered if all those times have passed by now.
Hearing the sound of a customer, I gave a loud greeting. I looked towards the door with a bright and healthy smile.
it seemed as though Hoseok reminiscence them a lot, wondering how they are but he is skilled at hiding his emotions, taking on a job to hide away his worries by being around people and hiding from his past.
looking at Taehyung’s notes now,
29 March YEAR 22
The gas station owner spat on the ground as he left. I laid down on the ground in the same position that I had crouched in. I was drawing at the back of the wall of the gas station, only to be caught by the owner, who beat me and angrily asked what I was doing, drawing on somebody else’s wall. I rolled around the floor. Getting hit was something that I was familiar and at the same time, unfamiliar with.
I started graffiti not too long ago. I took a spray can that someone threw away and started drawing on the wall. It was yellow colour. I sprayed it whatever I wanted and then looked up at it. I looked at the distinct yellow colour paint on the grey paint, then picked up another spray can. For a long time, I sprayed unknowingly on the wall. Only when the spray cans were all empty did my hands stop. I threw the can away and stepped back. My breath came as though I had been running with all my might.
I didn’t know what the colours on the wall meant. I didn’t know what I had done or why had I done it. But I had done it. I would assume that what I expressed were my feelings. I spewed out my heart onto the wall. Initially, I thought it was ugly. I thought it was something dirty. Something idiotic, useless and pitiful. I didn’t like it. I rubbed some of the wet paint with my hand. I wanted to erase it all. Yet, instead of erasing it, I ended up mixing and blending the colours and moulded different shapes. I sat against the wall. It wasn’t a matter of whether or not I liked it. It wasn’t a matter of whether it was beautiful or not. It was just me.
When I stood up, I coughed. I spat blood onto my hand. Then I saw someone’s hand picking up the spray can. I followed the hand up until I saw a face. I saw Namjoon Hyung’s face. I laughed. I thought I was seeing a ghost. Hyung reached out a hand. I simply looked up at him. Hyung took my hand and pulled me up. His hand was warm.
Taehyung is seen to be caught to vandalize the walls at the gas station and fortunately for him, Namjoon was there, as always.
on 7 April however, Jungkook bumps into Yoongi who is still haunted by the piano.
7 April YEAR 22
I came to a stop after hearing the sound of a piano. The only sound that could be heard at the empty construction site was someone popping an oil drum. I knew the sound of the song that I had just played, but why did I think of that? My drunken footsteps stumbled. I closed my eyes and walked even more carelessly. As the heat of the fire grew stronger, the piano sound, the night air, the drunkenness fading away.
I opened my eyes at the sound of horn as a car grazed dangerously past me. In the confusion of the blazing headlight, the wind of the car’s passing and my drunkenness, I stumbled helplessly. I could hear the curses of the driver. As I came to a stop to curse back, I could no longer hear the sound of the piano. In spite of the sound of the blazing fire, the wind and the silence left after the car, the piano sound was gone. It stopped. Why did it stop? Who was playing the piano?
The sparks from the fire picked up its pace towards the oil barrel with one sound together. I could only look at the scene blankly. My face became flushed. Bang, it was at that moment when I heard a fist slamming on the piano keys. Instinctively, I looked behind. For a moment, my blood rushed that my breathing became uneven. The nightmares that I had when I was young. That was where I heard the sound.
The next moment, I was running. It wasn’t of my own will that I ran towards the music shop and instinctively looked behind. This was something like I had done numerous times. It was a feeling that I had forgotten something important.
The music store had a broken window. In front of the piano, someone was sitting there. It had been a few years yet I still recognized the person. The person was crying, fists being clenched. I didn’t want to be concerned with anyone’s life. I didn’t want to comfort anyone who was lonely. I didn’t want to mean anything to someone. I couldn’t protect the person and I had no confidence. Until the end, I had no confidence. I didn’t want to give pain. I didn’t want to receive pain.
I slowly moved. I wanted to go back but before I know it, I started approaching the person. Just then a wrong note was heard. Jungkook lifted his head and looked at me. “Hyung”. This had been our first meeting since quitting high school.
it seems like this the part in the first love short film, where a car almost crashed into him, instead of the music store having a broken window, Yoongi broke it instead.
it seems like here, alternatively Jungkook was the one who broke the window first.
however, there seems to be something happening between Namjoon and Taehyung on this day, based on HYYH: the Notes, V Version
Namjoon
11 April YEAR 22
I was looking for a t-shirt for a while until Taehyung reached for a t-shirt behind me. It was a shirt that had the same printed letters as the one that I was wearing right now. With an awkward laugh, he removed the ripped shirt. In the faint illumination of the lights that hung from the trailer ceiling, I momentarily caught a glimpse of his bruised back. Hoseok looked at me with a shocked expression. Taehyung put on my shirt and looked at his reflection in the dirty mirror. Then he laughed.
“This punk. He arrived late after getting caught by the police for doing graffiti.” I pretended to hit Taehyung and he pretended to be sorry. Yoongi Hyung who had been sitting at the corner of the trailer, slowly approached Taehyung and smacked his shoulder.
so that means Namjoon, Taehyung and Yoongi saw each other on this day; yet no one had the whereabouts of Jungkook.
yet later on at night, Namjoon bumps into Seokjin.
11 April YEAR 22
I finished with the gas and went in. But something brushed against my face and fell. Surprised, I took a step backwards to look at it. At the bottom of my feet was a crumpled bill. Out of reflex, I bent down to pick it up. The people in the car burst into laughter. I stopped for a moment. Seokjin Hyung was watching me from a distance. I couldn’t lift my head up. What do you do if you make eye contact with people who ride in expensive cars but put down and ridicule others? You have to face them. If you think what they’re doing is unjust, you have to face them. It’s not a matter of bravery, or pride or equality but it is something that needs to be done.
However, this was a gas station and I’m a part time-worker. If a customer threw trash, I had to clean it up. And if they cursed, I had to listen. And if they threw a bill on the floor, I had to pick it up. My body shook with humiliation. I clenched my fists. My fingernails dug into my skin.
At that moment, someone’s hand picked up the bill. The people in the car muttered and left as if the fun in it was gone. Even after they left, I couldn’t lift my head up. I lacked the confidence to look into Seokjin Hyung’s eyes. It wasn’t as though Hyung didn’t know about my cowardliness, my poverty and my circumstances. I didn’t want to show him this explicitly. Hyung stood at the end of my gaze and didn’t move. Neither did he approach me or did he speak.
this is just like the webtoon itself. the day that Seokjin visited Namjoon in the detention centre was on May 22, but the reason why he was there was the fight between him and a rude customer on April 11 which Seokjin eventually prevented.
yet on this day when Namjoon is in jail, it meant that Taehyung actually killed his father and he was being arrested. so instead of Taehyung dying, he killed his own father.
this was in line with Yoongi’s Note from the S version.
11 April YEAR 22
I kept on walking, though I had a sense that Jungkook was following from a distance. As the train tracks stretched out, containers continued to appear. It’s the 4thcontainer from the back. Hoseok said he had plans to meet with Namjoon and Taehyung, and told me to come too. I told him I would come, but I didn’t really intend to go. I hated getting involved with others and Hoseok knew that. He probably didn’t have any thoughts of me turning up.
When I opened the door, I could see Hoseok’s surprised face. Then he discovered Jungkook and approached him with mixed emotions. I passed by both of them and headed to the container. “How long has it been?” I could hear the sounds of Hoseok trying to pull Jungkook and Jungkook being embarrassed.
I could hear Namjoon bringing Taehyung in. Taehyung’s shirt was torn on one side. When we asked what happened, Namjoon pretended to rap his knuckles against Taehyung. “This brat was late because he was arrested by the police for doing graffiti and I had to go pick him up.” Taehyung made an exaggerated apologetic face and talked animatedly how his shirt was torn when he ran away from the police.
I sat in the corner and watched them. Namjoon gave Taehyung a shirt to change into, Hoseok pulled out hamburgers and drinks. Jungkook being in the middle but was unsure of what to do or where to go. Looking back in high school, this was how it was. In the hideout classroom, Namjoon would give Taehyung a talk, Hoseok would move around noisily while Jungkook would hover, not knowing where to go.
How long has it been since we have gathered. I don’t remember it well. How are Seokjin Hyung and Jimin? A thought unlike of mine came to me. This was a place I had come for the first time, but my heart is already at ease.
the idea of brotherhood being family is being re-established here, knowing that despite your whereabouts, as long as you’re with your family, it’s home and puts you at ease no matter what.
yet at the same time, the whole scene of Jungkook being at the top relates back here, turns out Jungkook was trying to kill himself after being beaten up by some people he bumped into.
the beginning introduced at the Her Notes,
11 April YEAR 22
In the end, it turned out just like I wanted. I deliberately ran into the thugs on the street and got beaten up till I was satisfied. I laughed while I was getting beaten up, and they called me a crazy maniac. I leaned against the shutter door and looked at the sky. It was already night. There was nothing in the pitch-black sky. I could only see a clump of grass in the distance. It was on the side of the wind. It was just like me. I felt like I was going to cry so I forced myself to laugh instead.
I closed my eyes and saw my stepfather clear his throat. My stepbrother kicked me and laughed. My stepbrother’s relatives looked elsewhere or began to talk useless things. It was as if I wasn’t there, like my existence didn’t matter. In front of them, my mother was at a loss. I tried to stand up but instead dust rose and I coughed. It hurt as if I had been stabbed at my solar plexus. I went up to the roof of the construction site. The night city stretched out in a terrible colour. I climbed up on the railing with both of my arms stretched out. I had one leg out and I almost lost my balance. I thought I could die with just one step. If I died, it will all end. No one would be sad without me.
Answer Notes:
11 April YEAR 22
I walked on the top of the railing of the roof top. The building had been abandoned while it was in the middle of its construction. When I stretched out one foot in the air, the darkness engulfed beneath me. The night city spread out hazily below the railings. Neon lights, honking horns and smoking dust swirled in the darkness. For a moment, I felt dizzy. I stretched out my arms to regain my balance. Then I thought. It was only one step. If I took one step, everything would end. I leaned my body more towards the darkness. The darkness that started at the bottom of my feet now came up to devour my body whole. When I closed my eyes, the dizzy city, sounds and fear all disappeared. I stopped breathing. Then, I leaned my body towards the darkness even more. I didn’t have any thoughts. No one came to my mind. I didn’t want to leave anything behind. I wouldn’t remember anything. This was just the end.
At this moment, my phone rang. My senses came back to me as though I woke up from a distant dream. My dulled senses returned immediately. I pulled out my phone. It was Yoongi Hyung.
He wanted everything to end but somehow Yoongi sopped him, just like how Jungkook stopped Yoongi on 2 May.
but in the webtoon, turns out Seokjin stopped him.
moreover, it seemed as though in the beginning of the day, there is some relationship with Seokjin as well, based on the HYYH: the Notes, E version.
Seokjin
11 April YEAR 22
I came to the sea alone. The blue, broad sea was one that could be opened whenever in the viewfinder as it always had. It was all the same, the light that sparkled from the water, the wind from the pine forest. The only difference was that I was here alone. As soon as I pressed the shutter, the scenery in front of my eyes flickered, that moment, on that day, 2 years and 10 months before seemed to appear and disappear. That day when we were all sitting in front of the sea. Though we were tired and times were rough, we were together. I turned the car and stepped on the accelerator. I entered the tunnel and passed by a rest stop. When I reached vicinity of the school that we all attended, I opened the car window. It was a night in spring. The air was warm and the cherry blossoms fluttered in the trees that lined the walls of the school. I left and passed several intersections, made several left and right turns. In the distance, I could see the lights of the gas station where Namjoon works.
here is where Seokjin begins to unravel his mistakes by doing things slightly different as seen in the webtoon.
yet also, here, Seokjin wakes up and instead of going back to the 11 April, he wakes up to
11 April YEAR 22
The moment I closed my eyes, it was the 4thApril yet again. I opened the curtain with the glaring sunlight entering the room. When I raised my body, I was overwhelmed and closed my eyes. My surroundings changed to one that was of a reddish image and I saw Taehyung’s appearance. He was standing alone at the top of the observation platform at the beach. That happened on 22 May. It was the past and the future, something that already happened in the past but could still happen in the future. It was at that moment I thought everything was resolved.
I saw Taehyung climbing up the ladder as the sun began to set. The sky was still blue but gradually it began to have a red colour seeping in. When I lifted my head, I saw Taehyung climbing the ladder. When he reached the top, he looked down at us for a moment. Afterwards, he jumped. Just like a bird, like he had wings. Then for one moment, it seemed as if he stopped in the air, just like that the mirror cracked, the wind blew the curtains open and my senses came back.
And just like that, I opened my eyes and it was the 4th April again.
based on the webtoon, Seokjin goes back to the 11 April but here in the Notes, it’s the 4 April, which one is exactly true then?
if you look here, in the notes from Tear,
11 April YEAR 22
With a screech, the car had barely came to a stop. I was so deep in thought that I didn’t see the light changing. Students in familiar uniforms were crossing the street and looking at me through the window. Some people were pointing at me. I forced a smile and bowed my head.
I knew what I had to do. But I wasn’t unafraid. It was more of could I put an end to all these misfortunes and pain? What is the point of repeating the same failure mean that I wont be able to achieve success? But is it telling me to give up? Is our happiness just a meaningless hope? Uncomfortable thoughts like these raced through my mind.
At some point, I approached the intersection with a gas station and I could see Namjoon filling up some cars. I took a deep breath and slowly let it out slowly. I could see all of their faces when I tried to recall them one by one – Yoongi, Hoseok, Jimin, Taehyung and Jungkook. I changed lanes and then entered the gas station. I didn’t want to give up. Even if there was a 1% chance, I wouldn’t give up. Through the window, I saw Namjoon approach.
this is when Seokjin knew he had to save them, somehow or rather, he aimed to save 5 of them, all excluding Namjoon from killing themselves etc. at most what happened if Seokjin didnt save Namjoon is that he would end up in jail.
so this deviates already from the INU timeline in which Namjoon dies at the gas station.
also, if you look at the webtoon, it means on June 12 they went to the beach together, this is before they separated.
looking at Namjoon’s notes from S version.
28 April YEAR 22
I knew that something was up with Taehyung for a long time. Even if he pretended occasionally that nothing was wrong, his momentarily actions, expressions or tone would give away his anxiety and the facy that he didn’t know what to do. He was often in and out of the police station and I could see the wounds on his body. And also, he had nightmares.
The reason why I never really asked, or asked what was going on or telling him to let out everything was because I was waiting for him to do it. On one side, I also doubted if I should be the person to hear his worries. I wanted to be a Hyung to him, I pretended to be an adult, yet, when my friends are having a hard time, I couldn’t protect them. They all looked up to me being an adult yet I am really not an adult. I only hesitated, unable to look directly at what’s in front of me.
Yoongi Hyung died. Taehyung had that nightmare again. I grabbed his shoulders and shook him, he woke up startled and spent a long time sitting and staring into space. He didn’t wipe his tears and mumbled incoherently. He said Yoongi was dead and Jungkook had an accident and I had been caught in a fight. He said that he dream that kind of dream often, that it was so clear that it seemed as if it was real and even this was part of the dream. “Hyung, don’t go anywhere.” Taehyung’s voice wavered anxiously.
this would be in link when Jungkook also wakes up from a nightmare, something similar happened to him that he eventually broke out in a fever as mentioned in the notes.
on May 2, Yoongi is the one now trying to commit suicide by setting the room on fire but was saved by Jungkook.
on this day, Jungkook tells Namjoon that he wants to be like him but has a nightmare of Yoongi.
2 May YEAR 22
I turned my head and was in front of Namjoon Hyung’s container. I opened the door and went in. I gathered the strewn clothes, covered myself in them and bent down. The cold came down on me. My whole body was trembling, I wanted to cry. But no tears came.
I opened the door to see Yoongi Hyung standing on top of the bed. Flames were coming up from the sheet. At that moment, my whole body was engulfed in rage and fear that I couldn’t hold back. I wasn’t someone who could speak well. I was slow to express my feelings or to convince someone. Tears welled in my eyes and I coughed yet no words came out. As I ran into the flames, the only words I could spit out in that moment were “We promised to go to the beach together.”
“Why are you like this? Was it a nightmare?” Someone shook my shoulder and I opened my eyes. It was Namjoon Hyung. I didn’t know why but I felt relieved. Hyung felt my forehead and said I had a fever. Really, that was the case. The inside of my mouth was burning yet I felt unbearably cold. I had a throbbing headache and my throat hurts. I barely managed to eat the medicine that Hyung brought for me. “Sleep more. We’ll talk later.” I nodded my head. Then I said this. “Can I become an adult like Hyung?” Namjoon Hyung looked back.
on May 10, Hoseok fell on the expressway as such; but he didn't die.
on 12 May, Hoseok thought he saw his own mother in the hospital as he was being treated for collapsing on the expressway.
as seen here, and in the webtoon.
12 May YEAR 22
I opened the door of the emergency room and ran down the stairs. My heart was racing as if it was about to explode. The face that I had a glimpse of in the hospital hallway was of my mother’s. At the moment I looked back, the elevator doors opened and people pushed their way out. I pushed desperately among the people. And I saw my mother’s form going into the emergency room doors. Anxiously, I ran down two steps at a time. Without resting, I ran dome several flights.
“Mom!”. My mother stopped. I took another step forward. She turned around. I went down another flight. Her became visible. It was at that moment that my heel of the foot slipped on the edge of the stair and my center of gravity was pushed forward. I closed my eyes tight, bracing myself that I was going to fall flat on my face. Someone grabbed my arm, and thanks to that person, I narrowly avoided the fall and regained my balance. When I looked back, I saw Jimin standing there with a shocked expression. Before I could even say thank you, I turned my head again.
A woman was there. She looked surprised. Next to her was a young boy, staring at me and blinking with his big eyes. She isn’t my mother. I stood at the top of the stairs, blankly staring at the woman’s face.
I couldn’t remember what I said to escape that situation. I also didn’t ask how Jimin appeared there in the first place. My mind was too cluttered to be concerned about the small details. The woman wasn’t my mother. I might even have known that from the start. It had been more than ten years since she had left me alone at the theme park. My mother would have been older by now, and different from what I remembered. Even if I met her, I wouldn’t recognize her. No, by now, I could barely even remember her face.
I looked back. Jimin was following me in silence. Back in high school, after we parted ways in the emergency room, Jimin said he had to stay in the hospital. I thought of how he looked as if he didn’t know what to do when asked if he wanted to get out of the hospital. Couldn’t it be Jimin was trapped just like I was, unable to cling or break away from memories that bind us? I took a step towards him.
“Jimin-ah, let’s get out of here.”
so this is how Jimin and Hoseok got out of the hospital and somehow reunited with the rest of the boys.
on May 15, it seemed that the boys visited Jimin in the hospital, probably because he was hospital bound and couldnt leave and so they stuck to playing in the hospital’s cafeteria. but eventually as seen here, they all left the hospital.
15 May YEAR 22
When I opened my eyes, Hoseok Hyung was standing there. The familiar ceiling looked down at me with a familiar darkness. Startled, I tried to sipt up but he placed a finger on his lips. Everyone was sleep, my surroundings were quiet. Hyung immediately offered me a T-shirt, jerking his chin toward the exit of the hospital.
“We all came together” He mentioned that Namjoon Hyung was standing guard while Yoongi Hyung was buying time with the nurses. Jungkook and Taehyung would join us at the elevator in no time. At first, I couldn’t understand what he was saying. Hyung reached out a hand to me, while I was still in a daze.
The day I left the hospital. I had dreamt of that day sometimes. I wanted to leave the hospital and meet my friends. To spend some time with them laughing and talking the way we used to before. But now I didnt know. Was it a good idea to leave? My parents actually hid me in this place and pretended that I was someone who didn’t exist. People whispered I had a mental illness. I don’t know if Hoseok Hyung thought the same. Maybe he thought I was strange, that spending time with me made him uncomfortable.
“Come on, we don’t have time.” Maybe because of Hyung’s urging, the sound of the clock’s second hand sounded weirdly fast. Thump. Thump. The sound of footsteps, like an auditory hallucination, came closer and closer to the hospital room. Hyung and I turned simultaneously to look at the door, then looked at each other. Hyung’s hand was still in front of me.
this is how Jimin got out of the hospital despite being placed there by his own parents hence the story continues into 16 May.
the reason for Jimin being in the hospital was because of the incident that happened in the flower arboretum when he was young but of course the webtoon didnt specify the events that occurred but there was a pool of blood.
16 May is when Jimin visits Hoseok’s house which is very high.
Jimin
16 May YEAR 22
Hoseok Hyung’s house was actually quite high. A rooftop room of a deadlocked house at the end of a narrow, winding alley, some distance from a long street; that was Hyung’s house. When I entered the house, which was just one room, Hyung bragged that it was the top floor in the whole city; from which all the places that we have grown up from could be seen, laid down below our feet. Hyung said that there is so many things to see from this rooftop room. The nearby train station could be seen, and along the train tracks, the containers were also visible, Namjoon Hyung was living in one of those. If I look a little more, the school that we all attend would appear.
After finding the school, I lifted my head and looked at the other side of the city. At the foot of the mountain, there were some large apartment buildings. Right there, that’s my house, no, that’s my parent’s house. I didn’t tell anyone that I ran away from the hospital. If I did, they would have called my parents. Right now, maybe, I don’t know, they might be looking for me. I don’t have the confidence to see them face-to-face. Though I came out of the hospital, there is no way that I’m going home. Even as such, I have no desire to go back to the hospital. But I had nowhere to go and had no money. I stood hesitantly, before Hyung told me to follow him, leading the way, and how we arrived at this place – his house.
My eyes looked back to the apartment houses again. I didn’t want to meet my parents or go back to the hospital even though eventually I had to. I took a deep breath in. It seemed like a thought alone could cause a seizure. Truthfully, I didn’t trust myself enough to endure any other place other than the hospital. I could be rushed to the hospital again. I was so afraid, I couldn’t stand it.
this is how the boys met up after a while, sort of being reunited by Seokjin, and looks like Yoongi knows Jimin’s discomfort about the flower arboretum.
19 May YEAR 22
In the end, we went to the flower arboretum. I lied that I don’t remember what happened at that place but I had to quit lying. I had to stop hiding in the hospital and having seizures. If I wanted to do that, I had to go to that place. With that in mind, I went to the bus stop every day yet I couldn’t ride the bus to go to the flower arboretum.
Yoongi hyung came and sat down next to me after 3 buses passed by. I asked him what he was up to, but he shrugged and said that he was bored and had nothing to do. Then he asked why was I sitting here. I lowered my head and kicked the dirt with my shoes. I asked myself why was I sitting here in the first place. I had no courage. Now I wanted to be fine, I wanted to pretend that I knew a bit, to surpass it on my own, yet in reality, I was afraid. I was scared that I might see something, I couldn’t withstand against it, that I might have another seizure.
Yoongi hyung looked relaxed.
as mentioned this could be why the pairing of Jimin and Yoongi came about. ( read theory here )
now moving on to May 20, it seemed as though Taehyung had an outburst. this was from Hoseok’s notes in Tear album.
20 May YEAR 22
I took Taehyung and stood facing the police officer. “You’ve worked hard.” Though it was hard to say with my head hung low, it wasn’t that feeling. The police station wasn’t that far from Taehyung’s house. If he lived in the same far-off place, would Taehyung have not been in and out of the police station often. Why had Taehyung’s parents chose a place so near to the police station? Why was the world unfair to such a foolishly kind and good kid. I slung my arm around Taehyung’s shoulders and asked if he was hungry, acting as if nothing much happened. Taehyung shook his head. I asked if he was glad that the police bought him food yet he didn’t answer.
We walked in the sunlight. In my heart, a cold wind blew. If I feel this way, how would he feel. How torn and broken in his heart? Did he even have any heart left at all? How much torment must be inside? Thinking of all these thoughts, I couldn’t look at him and so I looked at the sky. In the blurry sunlight, an airplane flew past. The first time I had seen Taehyung’s wounds was when he was in Namjoon’s container hideout. I didn’t say anything to Taehyung, who was laughing brightly for getting a t-shirt yet there was a thud in my heart.
I don’t have any parents. I don’t even have any memory of my father and only up till I was 7 years old did I have any memory of my mother. When it came to pain regarding families, nobody was jealous of me. People told me this. That you have to overcome the pain, accept it and grow accustomed to it. That you have to reconcile to forgive. Only when this is done, you are able to live. It wasn’t that I couldn’t do it because I didn’t know. It wasn’t a refusal since I hated it. Nothing was achieved since I didn’t try. No one told me how to do it. The world gave me new wounds before my old wounds healed. I knew that there wasn’t anyone in the world who didn’t have wounds. But why did anyone need deep ones? Why were they needed? Why did things happen this way?
“Hyung. I’m fine, I can go by myself.” Taehyung said at the fork of the road. “I know, jerk,” I didn’t pay attention and took the lead. “Really, I’m fine. Look at me, it’s nothing.” Taehyung tried to smile. I didn’t answer him. He wasn’t fine. He wasn’t okay but he couldn’t stand acknowledging it. He was turning away. That was his habit. He flipped up his hood and followed. “Are you really not hungry?” I asked as we were nearing his house. Taehyung smiled his foolish smile and nodded. I watched his retreating back and turned away. The paths that we both walked were narrow and desolate. We were both alone. I suddenly turned to look behind me when my phone rang.
this reminds me of Euphoria in which Taehyung and Hoseok are in the room. this is probably after his outburst with his father.
further continuation of Taehyung’s notes are here.
20 May YEAR 22
I looked down at my hand. It was stained with blood. Suddenly, my legs had no strength. I started to collapse but someone grabbed me from behind. Murky sunlight was shining through the window. Noona was crying and Hoseok Hyung was standing there without saying anything. The dirty household goods and blanket remained as they were. There was no one there where my father stood. I couldn’t recall how or when he had left the room.
The rage and sadness of when I attacked him was still in me. I didn’t know what held me back from stabbing him. I didn’t how to comfort my crazy heart. I didn’t want to kill my father, I wanted to die. In that moment, I just wanted to die. I couldn’t cry. I wanted to cry, I wanted to scream, I wanted to kick and destroy and ruin things yet I didn’t do any one of them.
“Hyung. I’m sorry. I’m okay, so just go,” My voice came out unsteady with how my mad heart is beating. It didn’t seem like my voice. I sent Hoseok Hyung away even though he didn’t want to leave and stared down at my hands. Blood is seeping through the white bandage. Instead of stabbing my father, I fell to the floor with the alcohol bottle. The bottle had shattered and cut my hand. I closed my eyes, yet the world started spinning. What should I think and what should I do to live. When I came to my senses, I was looking down at Namjoon Hyung’s phone number. Even in this case, no, because I was in this situation, I valued his existence so much more. I wanted to talk to him. Hyung. I almost killed my father, the father who raised me, my father who beats me up everyday. No, actually, I killed him. I killed him so many times. In my heart, I killed him so many times. I wanted to die. I really wanted to kill him. I don’t know what to do now, I don’t know. Hyung. I just wanted to see you.
it seemed like here Taehyung didnt kill his dad, so it doesn't follow the I Need U timeline but rather the Euphoria one instead. hence why Hoseok and Taehyung are paired up as well, coincidence or not. ( read theory here )
now continuing on to May 22 when Taehyung was meant to jump, he had a fall out with Namjoon as seen from the notes in Her.
22 May YEAR 22
I passed by a pine tree forest as Hyung picked up a phone call and started to lag behind. Nowadays, there were more times like this. He moved far away so that he could pick up the call where others couldn’t eavesdrop. I deliberately slowed down ad hid myself off towards the ocean. Hyung wouldn’t be able to see me when he passed by. “He’s only one year younger than me. No, I don’t really care. Anyway, I’m not going to be the one taking the responsibility, just do whatever is best.”
Something cold slithered down my spine. It felt as if everything in the world crumbled and crashed with a bang. It felt as if I was floating alone in the deep ocean. It was scary and frightening. I was miserable and insignificant. I was angry. I couldn’t contain my anger. I wanted to cause a scene. I wanted to smash something, to hit something, to wreck myself. I was always afraid. That my father’s blood would run in me. I thought that maybe his violence was what I inherited. It seemed that something was stabbing my tight defenses.
Taehyung here felt betrayed but this could lead up to the next part as seen below.
the before events were seen in Namjoon’s ones from tear album.
22 May YEAR 22
“It’s barely a year age gap difference. No, who said it? I am the Hyung. I know. But he won’t forever be young. I’m asking if it isn’t it about time he knows something. I get it. No, I am not mad. I’m sorry.”
I ended the call and looked down at the floor. A sad ocean breeze swept through the pine forest. My chest was stifled that it felt that it might explode. On the ground, half of it was sand and half of it was dirt, some ants formed a line and were heading elsewhere, To someone who was greater than me, both physically and symbolically, would it be clear of where I was going, why I was going and how it would turn out?
It wasn’t that I didn’t love my parents. It wasn’t that I didn’t worry for my younger sibling. I wanted to turn away if I could, but since I couldn’t do anything but be myself, I wasn’t able to. And so, what’s the point in struggling or being angry, frustrated or wanting to leave?
I could see the back of someone’s back, standing rooted to the ground just like me. It was Jungkook. At some point, Jungkook said this. “Hyung, I want to be an adult like Hyung.” At that time, I couldn’t say anything. I wasn’t an adult that I was proud of, no, I am not an adult. Saying something like that was cruel. To someone who has yet to receive the trust, interest and affection that he naturally should have, how could I say that getting older, growing taller and living a little more doesn’t make one an adult. I hoped Jungkook’s future would be more kinder than mine, but I couldn’t promise that I could be of help to him along the way. I approached him and slung my arm around his shoulder. Jungkook lifted his eyes and looked at me.
Namjoon’s notes are always more abstract for some reason i have no idea why. hence why Jungkook and Namjoon are paired as well. ( read theory here )
on May 22 is when by right Taehyung jumps and looking to the events in the day it continues the one from the Euphoria, the whole time I suspected it to be Jungkook to be the one saying it to Seokjin but it seems like Taehyung is the one who was saying it as seen here. the reason why I suspected Jungkook saying it was due to his accident that Seokjin would eventually cause.
22 May YEAR 22
“Hyung, is that everything? Are you hiding anything else from us?” Our surroundings suddenly grew quiet. Everyone’s gaze turned towards me. I looked straight at Seokjin Hyung. Hyung, too, looked back at me. His gaze was full of exhaustion and shame, and a little bit of pitiful. The moment that I was about to bring up the issue, someone grabbed my arm. I didn’t need to look. I knew it was Namjoon Hyung.
“Hyung, what does it have to do with you? We’re not even real brothers.” I could feel Namjoon Hyung looking at me. I didn’t lift my head and shook his hand off. I knew it too. I was mad at Namjoon Hyung for no reason, repeating the same words that he used when he was on the phone. I said I was angry, that I was upset. Yet, Hyung’s words weren’t wrong. I am barely a year younger than him. I wasn’t his real brother. It was true that I should take care of myself. Regardless, I was upset. I was angrier because I had no words to use against him. I wished Hyung would have understood what I felt.
“Taehyung-ah, I’m sorry. Let’s not talk about this now.” It was Seokjin Hyung who opened his mouth. Seokjin Hyung was the one who called my name, Namjoon Hyung didn’t say anything. “What do you mean, stop? Since it’s already up, let’s talk about it. Hyung, there is still something you’re hiding from us.”
“Let’s go out to talk.” Namjoon Hyung said while he grabbed my arm. I tried to shake him off again but he tried to drag me out. I tried to hold out and spoke. “Let me go. What right to you have to stop me? Hyung, what do you know? You don’t know anything but you think you’re a great guy, right?” It was then then he let go of my arm. When he let go made me stumble. No, it wasn’t just him letting go that made e stumble. But at that time when he did, it was like as if everything that sustained me were cracking, breaking and crumbling down. Maybe I hoped he never let go of my arm. That instead, he would get angry and drag me out. Maybe I hoped that he would scold me like a real brother, as if to someone who was so close and precious that you can’t ignore.
But Hyung let go of my arm. I just laughed. “What’s so special about being together? What are we to each other? In the end, we’re all alone.” That was the moment that Seokjin Hyung hit me.
now looking at the ending, this is where the whole outburst between Seokjin and Taehyung started and though the BST Jp isn't part of the timeline, I believe you should include it in to make sense as to why Seokjin even punched him in the face.
if only Taehyung knew that only by being together could Seokjin stop all of them from dying but I guess somethings are left to be untold, hence the truth untold maybe.
on May 31, Hoseok after dancing had a slight trauma etc
Hoseok
31 May YEAR 22
I reflexively turned my gaze away from the breathtaking wind. After dancing for a long time, often, I am out of breath but it is not that context. I thought I was similar to my mother. No, it wasn’t a thought or a perception, it couldn’t be described or explained. I couldn’t look at the face of my friend that I had known for 10 years already. We learned dance together, failed together, been frustrated and gained strength together. We slumped to the floor that was covered in sweat, we threw towels at each other and cracked jokes. It felt like a bothering sensation that I hadn’t felt in a while, and I hurriedly stood up. As soon as I reached the corner, I leaned back against the wall and stood there. I made an effort to calm my breathing. I could hear, “Where are you going, Hoseok-ah?” The voice. Nevertheless, I thought it could have been a voice. The voice calling, “Hoseok-ah”. A voice that I couldn’t recall now. It was a voice that brought me back to when I was nine years old.
here, it seemed as though Hoseok is out of the hospital but it follows that of the highlight reel in which he and the girl are practicing to which later on the other notes mentioned that how Jimin isn't in the hospital anymore but is out dancing and that he is jealous of Hoseok.
right now, I am just disregarding all those that happened before YEAR 22 because they all just give background information on each of the boys and as to why they behave and act as such, so please take this into caution.
time to look at the notes from Her album,
Yoongi
8 June YEAR 22
I took off my t-shirt again. I looked in the mirror and it was not like me at all. The cotton shirt that was not my type had the word ‘Dream’ on it. No matter how you look at it, the red colour, the word, dream, the shirt didn’t fit me at all. Out of frustration, I pulled a cigarette and looked for my lighter. Since it wasn’t in the back pocket of my jeans, I looked inside my bag. (They) took it away. (They) took it from my hands without any constraint. (They) threw back to me were candy bars and this t-shirt.
I messed up my hair and stood up when I heard the sound of a message. My heart began to beat faster as at the moment, my hand phone screen lit up brightly with a name that was 3 syllabuses. I broke my cigarette to check the message. In the next moment, I was laughing at the mirror. Wearing the tight t-shirt that had ‘Dream’ written on it, the red colour, I must have looked like an idiot.
I'm assuming this is the period that Yoongi goes into rehab for being an arsonist by setting himself on fire, or at least attempted to but somehow was saved by Seokjin.
based on the notes in Tear,
Yoongi
15 June YEAR 22
I wasn’t aware of what is happening but just the sound of music playing in my head. No matter how much alcohol I drink, or where I am, what I am doing is more important. If you want to know, it isn’t important. With faltering steps, I went out into the night. Just walking among the dust. Be it on the street, the street stall or the wall, I hit it. It didn’t matter. I just wanted to forget everything.
Jimin’s voice was still ringing in my ears. “Hyung. It’s Jungkook.” The next thing I remembered was going up the stairs in the hospital as if I was mad. It was a dark and weird pathway towards the north of the hospital. People who were wearing patient gowns walked past. My heart was racing. Everyone’s faces were pale. They had no facial expression. They all seemed as though they were dead. In my head, my breathing became more ragged.
I opened the door of the ward where Jungkook was lying down in slightly. I, myself, don’t know why but I turned my head away with a jerk. I couldn’t look at him. In that moment, I could hear the sounds of the piano, fire, the collapse of the building into pieces. I couldn’t even stick it up for him. I then thought,”It was because of me. If I wasn’t there, this wouldn’t have happened.” It was my mother’s voice, no, my voice, no, it was anybody’s voice. I couldn’t say anything during that painful time. I didn’t want to believe it. But then, Jungkook was lying down there. He was lying down with patients who looked dead passing by. I just couldn’t go inside. I couldn’t even confirm it. When I stood, my legs wanted to give up. I left with tears streaming down my face. I forced myself to laugh. I couldn’t even remember the last time I cried.
As I crossed the pedestrian crossing, someone grabbed my arm and I stopped. Who was it? No, it didn’t matter. Whoever it was, it was all over. “Don’t come to my side. Go. Please just throw me away. I also don’t want to hurt you. I don’t want to be hurt. And so, please don’t come near me.”
here, Yoongi blames himself for the cause of Jungkook’s accident so it seems as though the accident with Seokjin was one on 11 April, but Jungkook got into another one later on in June, beyond what possibly Seokjin could control. so technically, Seokjin didnt cause this accident.
the person who grabbed his arm is the girl that he spends time with in the highlight reel, the whole pedestrian scene being protagonist here.
for Taehyung, the idea of the girl following him based on the highlight reel could be seen here.
Taehyung
25 June YEAR 22
I deliberately delayed my steps as I sensed to the small steps that was following me. This was the 3rdtime already at the convenience store. If there was something different, it was that today they ran away when they saw me. They hung around a vacant spot behind the convenience store but as I turned up, they hid themselves again. They hid themselves well but their shadows were reaching to the front of the store. I let out a laugh. I pretended that I didn’t see but they began to follow me.
I entered a narrow alley. This is the only place in the neighbourhood without a broken streetlamp. The alley was long and the streetlamp was somewhere in the middle with my shadow stretching. The shadow now stretches behind me. It could have been stretching all the way to the person who was following me with ragged breath. I started walking a little bit faster. As I passed the streetlamp, my shadow disappeared beneath my feet. Not long after, a shadow that wasn’t mine appeared on the cement floor. I stopped walking and so did the movements. The two shadows of different heights stopped side by side.
I said, “I’m going to wait until you come here.” The shadow behind me leaped out of shock. Then it became still as if it wasn’t here. “I can see everything.” I pointed to the shadow. The footsteps became nearer and deliberately were noisy. I laughed.
the scene of her following Taehyung wherever they went, from one meeting at the convenience store to that at the train tracks. interesting that Taehyung has a keen eye on his surroundings.
Namjoon
30 June YEAR 22
I looked a bit strange as I pushed the open button of the door as if my own hands had a will of their own. There are these kind of moments. Moments that I felt have repeated for numerous times, though it was the first. The elevator door close before they opened again for people to push their way in. Among them, I looked for the person who tied her hair with a yellow rubber band. I didn’t press the button knowing that the person would be there, but I thought the person would certainly be there. I moved back, one step at a time. When my back hit the cold elevator wall, I looked up and saw the yellow rubber band.
A person’s back tells a lot of stories. I had known a few of them. There were some that I could guess yet there were some that were left alone after everything is over. I thought that you know someone when you can read everything just from his back. Then, wouldn’t there be someone who would know me just from reading my back? As I lifted my head, our gazes met in the mirror. In a flash, she avoided my eyes. This kind of thing happens often. When I lifted my head again, I only saw my face. I couldn’t see my back.
here, I'm not sure why Namjoon even mentioned this, just like what I explained in 1984, i guess he is talking about body language. i figure the back is somewhat by being able to read it, means you've known what the person is really feeling, in a way to say that the person let his guard down unknowingly.
continuing from the Hoseok story on 31 May, it is clearly seen on 3 July, Jimin dances together with him and some sort of rivalry forms but has also been extended to the girl that they both like based on the highlight reel.
Jimin
3 July YEAR 22
In the end, I sprawled onto the floor. I turned off the music and my surroundings went quiet, all I could hear was the beating of my heart. I pulled out my hand phone and played the choreography dance video that I had learned in the morning. Hyung’s movements were so smooth and accurate in the video. That was the result of his countless hours and sweat of practicing, and now since I wasn’t anywhere near as him, I was jealous. However, understanding and hoping are different and so I sighed often. Again I stood up. I imitated the turn as he had done it but I kept twisting my steps. I kept on making mistakes at the parts where we have to match the flow. We decide to match again tomorrow but until then I wanted to be seen as serious. Rather that a playful phrase, I wanted to be complimented as ‘better than expected’, I wanted to be recognized as someone who was equal and serious, one that could match with hyung.
in the HYYH Tear notes, Hoseok‘s notes come about and it’s about the girl agin in the highlight reel.
Hoseok
4 July YEAR 22
I was standing in the hallway the whole time she was receiving first aid. Though it was in the middle of the night, there were many people hovering around. I was soaked to the skin by the rain and my own sweat that my hair was dripping with it. I shook off the sweat and rain off my hair and put down the bag that was with her. A diversity of things came out tumbling out of it. Coins rolled onto the floor, even a ballpen and a towel fell out. In the middle, there was a airplane e-ticket. I picked it up and read it briefly.
Then, the doctor called me. He told me that she had a mild concussion and that it’s nothing to worry a lot about. Soon later, she came out as well. “Are you alright?” She said that her head hurt slightly and she took her bag from me. She saw that the e-ticket was peeking out and looked at my face. I changed the strap of my bag slung onto my shoulder and pretended that I didn’t see anything and said that we should go. It has been raining for some time already when we came to the front door. I stood at the front of the door.
“Hoseok-ah”. She called me. Her facial expression told me that she wanted to say something. “Let’s wait a while. I’ll buy an umbrella.” I recklessly ran into the rain. There was a convenience store far off in the distance. I knew that for some time ago she entered an overseas dance team audition. The airplane ticket meant that she made it. I didn’t want her to say it. I didn’t have the confidence to congratulate her.
this was like in the highlight reels where Hoseok carried her in the rain while Jimin suffered when he scraped himself against the nail.
on this day as mentioned, Jimin comes into play as well.
Jimin
4 July YEAR 22
By the time I came back to my senses, I washed my arm so much that I was losing skin. My hands trembled and I was out of breath. Blood ran down my arm. Looking at the mirror, my eyes were bloodshot. The incident came back to my in fragments.
In that moment, I lost my focus. It was during the dance when I wanted to match the dance with Noona from a dance club that I lost my flow and collided into her. I fell to the rough floor and my arm started to bleed. I suddenly remembered what happened at the flower arboretum. I thought I had overcome it. But then, that wasn’t the case. I only ran away. I had to wash it away. I had to look away. The me in the mirror was the same 8-year old me who ran away in the rain. Then I realized it. Noona fell down as well.
There wasn’t anyone in the practice room. I saw the door open ajar with the rain falling outside. I could see Hoseok hyung running. The rain was pouring onto him. I ran after them with an umbrella. I ran. In the end, I stopped and stood there.
I couldn’t do anything. All I could was fall and hurt someone, leave them behind with a part of my pain and then run after them too late before stopping. I turned around. Every time I took a step, rain water soaked my sneakers. Car headlights passed me. I wasn’t okay. No, I am fine. I wasn’t in pain. This much isn’t an injury. I was really fine.
this was a trauma that Jimin encountered that brought him back to his 8 year old self, the whole reason why he was being kept in the hospital by his parents for years.
yet what happened at the flower arboretum is still unknown.
so next is Namjoom, it seems like he follows the girl closely as such based on the notes,
Namjoon
13 July YEAR 22
I leaned against the window of the bus. From the library to the gas station. The familiar scenery passing by the window since I take this route everyday. Will the day come for me to leave this scenery behind? I felt that it was impossible to predict what tomorrow would bring.
In the distance in front of me, I could see a lady wearing a yellow hair tie. Her shoulders liften and dropped as though she exhaled. She also leaned against the window. It has already been a month since we studied at the library and took the same bus from the station. We hadn’t spoken a word to each other, but we look at the same scenery together, lived in the same time and sighed the same sighs. The hair tie was still in my pants’ pocket.
The lady always dropped off three stations before me. I always wondered whether she would be distributing flyers there. What kind of things does she spend her time doing, what are the things that she’s enduring? How much has she been thinking that tomorrow might not come, or that from the beginning, there was never such a thing called ‘tomorrow’? These are what I thought about.
The station that the lady would drop by was approaching. Someone pressed the stop button and other passengers got up from their seats. However, in the midst of this, the lady didn’t move. Her head was just still against the window at where she sat. Time still passed. I went to get closer to her. In that moment, I was conflicted. The bus stop came near. The lady was still as how she was in the beginning. People got off the bus. The doors closed and the bus began to take off.
It has passed 3 bus stops but I didn’t want to wake her up. As I moved to the exit of the bus, I fought with myself again. It was clear that if I got off, no one would pay attention to her. She would wake up somewhere far from her stop and that it would be much more tiring today for her because of it.
I dropped off from the bus and the scent of the gas station started to waft through the air. The bus took off and I didn’t want to look back. I left the hair tie on top of her bag. That wasn’t the start but it wasn’t the end either. From the beginning, nevertheless, there was no whatsoever reason. I just thought that nevertheless, it didn’t matter.
personally I find Namjoon’s notes the most confusing one as there is barely much relation to the storyline as such.
his character development throughout the timeline wasn't much, it wasn't deeply explained unlike the others.
moving on, based on these notes, it is true that Jungkook was hit by the car since he ended up in the hospital and assuming that he was hit on April 11, it is possible that he was hospitalized for longer periods of time.
Jungkook
16 July YEAR 22
I stood at the window and sang a bit to the song playing in my earphones. It has already been a week. Now I don’t need to see the lyrics to sing along. I took out one side of my earphones so that I could practice listening to my own voice. (someone) said that they liked it because it was beautiful but it only made me scratch my head in embarrassment. The July sunshine entered the big window. The green leaves of the trees flew and shone in the wind and everytime it fell on my face, it felt different. I closed my eyes. I sang while looking at the yellow, blue and green colours behind my eyes. Whether it was the lyrics or the sunshine, something tickled and stung my heart.
based on these research, it is typical that any car accident patient would sustain injuries depending on severity etc, but clearly Seokjin did manage to save him in a way that Jungkook doesn't die but is still alive and is hospitalized.
on 17 July, it’s like the highlight reels here.
Taehyung
17 July YEAR 22
My side hurt so bad that it felt as if it was torn. Sweat trickled down my face. The corners of the railroad tracks, the vacant lot behind the convenience store, at the upper road – she was nowhere to be seen. Though I came behind the bus stop, of course, she wouldn’t be there. The commuters who were waiting for the bus were looking at me weirdly. What could I do? We didn’t promise to meet, but it was strange. She was always making appearances from somewhere and followed me around. Even calling her annoying was useless. Yet, the places that we went together, she wasn’t there.
I stopped walking upon the front of a familiar wall. This was where we did graffiti together. This was her first drawing. On top of it, there was a large X mark over it. It was her. There was no way I saw her do it, but I knew it was her. Why? I don’t have an answer. Instead, several after-images that were scary overlapped on the wall.
She laughed at me on the day when I hit my head against the railroad tracks as I lied down. Her helping me up as I helped her run away, her angry face when I stole and ate her bread. Her solemn expression when we passed by a photo studio with a family portrait in the front window. Her gaze on the students that we passed by, even she was oblivious to it. This wall was where we sprayed together as I said this. “If you have a problem, tell me. Don’t grumble about it to yourself.” This X was drawn all over these memories. It seemed to say that it was all fake. That it was all lies. Without even realizing it, I made my hands into fists. Why? Of course, I didn’t have an answer. I walked back. I was alone again. Me, and her.
the scene of the railroad tracks etc and running away from the police would happen later on
Namjoon
20 July YEAR 22
I skimmed across the magazine advertisements and lifted my head. There were so many different faces of those who sat at the corner table the last few days across me. A thick book, large bag and a white paper cup alike but it still wasn’t her. Again, I went back to skimming the magazines. I had been looking at the same page for more than an hour. Because of the repetitive thoughts, my eyes couldn’t pick up the letters at all. I asked myself why am I sitting here. No answer came to me. Amongst those who were engrossed in something, I was lethargically looking through a magazine. I felt impatient for something to start. This isn’t how it is meant to be.
I returned the magazine and continued to walk across the bookshelves The books were in rows on bookshelves taller than I was. From the open window, a breeze blew, the smell of books wafting and the dust hovering. I thought about my high school years again. My friends and I, together, in that hideout classroom. At that time, it smelled the same. Had the ‘Current Me’ grow from the “Then Me’? I couldn’t be sure of it. Regardless, it could be that everything of me had stopped at that time since back then. I moved to the opposite bookshelf. I picked up a book I used to study back then. I had to start again. From everything I had given up, one at a time.
Namjoon’s notes were always more self reflective on himself, it wasn’t so much about how the story line went as in the universe of the HYYH.
Jungkook
26 July YEAR 22
Quietly, I plucked a flower from the hospital’s flower bed. Every time, laughter comes out from the head that was bent down. The sunshine was shining so bright that it hurts the eyes. Though I knocked the hospital ward’s door, there was no answer. I knocked again, this time, it opened a bit. Inside the ward, there was just a sheet. And, there was no one there. There was just a very quiet and dark bed. I left the hospital room. That was where I met her personally when I was bored and was pushing my wheelchair in the hallway. She appeared so suddenly that I barely had time to stop. When I left the hospital, I saw a bench. I remembered that whenever we were together, we would sit and listen to music and even draw. We even drank strawberry milk together at the rooftop. I was still holding the flower from earlier but now I had no one to give it to.
here Jungkook is trying to find the girl that he befriended in the hospital but of course to no avail, she wasn't there anymore. what happened to her remains a mystery, not sure if it is crucial or not.
Jimin’s notes follow next.
Jimin
28 July YEAR 22
Today, I am left alone in the practice room. It was past twelve and the trains would have stopped running. Actually, I was waiting for the trains to stop running. That way, I could be left completely alone in the practice room. When we practiced together, my eyes were only focused on the areas where I lacked. That’s why I was restless, I was afraid. Yet, no matter what, I wanted to do it. So I stayed by myself every night.
As my days were spent like this, interestingly, the fear in my heart disappeared. Only the truth of dancing being fun remained. For a long time, I believed that the small, weak and powerless me was real. When I danced, I ended up thinking of my weight of my body or the length of my arms, speed or strength that I could make. When I danced, I didn’t feel small or weak. My skills improved greatly as much as I have practiced. The movements that had been stuttering at first were now being connected. I have grown. Even if the growth was as a fingernail, but I was still growing. I became aware that I was in reality, a talkative person. I knew that. When I danced, I was able to speak whatever I couldn’t say or hadn’t said. When I started to dance, for the first tine, I started to like myself.
Seems like this follows in suit to the highlight reels.
Taehyung’s notes brings us back to his vandalism endeavors but now related to the girl as seen in the highlight reel.
Taehyung
11 August YEAR 22
As I turned around, I discovered some words underneath the ‘X’. It was a short sentence scratched onto the wall, saying ‘It wasn’t my fault.”. It was that kid. I didn’t see her, nor did I know her handwriting but somehow I knew. It looked her last greeting. Saying that her leaving wasn’t because of me. That the things that made her ‘fall’ was not because I was a bad person. It seemed like it was telling me not to blame myself or to be hung up on it, but instead to have courage.
When I finally got back to my senses, I was in front of my house. From the outside the door, I could hear Noona’s scream. I flung it open and entered. A familiar scene was laid out. I blocked my father. I grabbed his arm and look right at his face. Initially, he seemed to be shocked, but then he swing his fist. This is not the first time that I was knocked out. Noona’s crying became louder. My chin hurt. The smell of dusty metal came from my own mouth. Yet, I didn’t give up. I grabbed my father’s waist. He gave off an angry scream. He mercilessly hit my back and shoulders but all the more I held on to him even tighter.
It wasn’t that it didn’t hurt. It wasn’t that I wasn’t scared. But if I let go, the same daily cycle would repeat. I wanted it to be different. I wanted to change it.
No. I’m different from my father. I’m going to protect our family.
It seems that Taehyung is trying to break the cycle of his abusive father, remember how he had his outbursts in the earlier months of April and May etc. not sure if this is after Taehyung killed his father or if he didnt even kill his own father hence either the I Need U timeline or the Euphoria timeline.
on this day, Jungkook is also a crucial character.
Jungkook
11 August YEAR 22
When I looked back, the hospital is really far away. I could no longer see the bench where I had left the wildflowers, neither could I see the window through wish I watched the river with the kid. As I reflected, that kid was a space for me to breathe in this stuffy hospital life. As we set on the hospital bench in the late afternoon talking about this and that, the sun had set. I told her about playing in the hideout classroom, going on a vacation to the beach and walking all the way up till the train station. She told me about all of the corners in the hospital , which window that you can see the river from, which staircase you could use to secretly climb up to the roof. There was nothing she didn’t know about the hospital.
Her hospital room was empty. Had she been discharged, or moved to another hospital? I asked the nurses. But none of them could tell me. For some reason, a corner of my heart felt empty. I turned around and just kept walking. From a distance, I could see the school. It seemed like most of the things I talked to her about was involved the Hyungs, and almost every single story started with them. To me, when I was alone, the Hyungs became my friends and family and teachers. My story was within their stories, and I only existed inside a relationship with them.
Yet, at some point, I started to think as such. That there may be a day where they would no longer be at my side. I might go looking for them to find out they’re gone, without any reason. Or maybe something even more could happen, I didn’t know.
I thought of that night. When the huge moon rose in the sky, the world turned upside-down, the headlamps I saw from an inverted view, the shape of the car that passed by me and eventually disappeared. The sound of the engine, which was familiar to me for some reason. I didn’t want to jump into conclusions. But even so, I just kept thinking of that moment.
following these notes would mean that Seokjin was the one who did end up colliding into him but not enough to kill him, and if assuming from this loophole that Jungkook didnt die entirely, guess Seokjin decided to crash into him to give some minor injuries and not entirely enough to kill him hence altering the timeline after all.
looking at Hoseok’s S version of the notes.
Hoseok
13 August YEAR 22
Jimin and the kid was standing in the middle of the practice room. The 5-second wait after the beginning pose always seemed long. As soon as the music flowed from the speaker, the two of them started the first move. It was the choreography that I had practiced with the kid not too long ago. I sat on the floor of the room and monitored.
When I first found out that I couldn’t dance for the time being, because of my ankle, it had been really difficult. It was suffocating that I could only watch others dance. But as I helped Jimin practice and watched him grow, a realization dawned on me. The fact that I cant dance by myself wasn’t a big problem and that I could be happy by continuing with dance in other ways.
When I practice with Jimin, I didn’t let even the smallest mistake go by. Jimin sometimes subtly missed the timing or made movements that are smaller than what I expect. At those times, I stopped the music and scrutinized each move, one by one. But when I sat on the floor, as some kind o audience, and watched from here, Jimin’s dance looked different. I saw something bigger than just his small one-by-one movements. Things that I initially thought and dismissed of as mistakes when we practice together dawned on me differently. Such trivial mistakes and imperfections instead came together to give off a unique feeling. Of course, it would be different than mine, but Jimin had his own timing and own expressions. Jimin’s dance was bright and touches the heart just the way it was.
The music ended. Jimin’s dance ended as well. I saw that his face was shining with excitement and joy. The kid was standing next to him. The kid would be going overseas soon. Suddenly, we locked eyes. I gave a thumbs-up and the kid gave a big smile. It was strange. The kid didn’t look a thing like my mother. I can’t even remember my own mother’s face, so why did I think they looked similar? Suddenly, something in my heart ached. My to-be healed ankle twitched.
this relates back to the highlight reels scene, when he and Jimin practiced dancing.
15 August YEAR 22
on this day, Seokjin drives out of the intersection and is in search of the Smeraldo flowers, but as to why he needed it to give to the girl, I have no idea, right now I'm just assuming they are lovers.
looking at the Notes from Her Album,
Seokjin
15 August YEAR 22
After coming out of the busy intersection, I came to an abrupt stop as I was about to pick up speed. The car behind me blared its horn and someone spat out curses yet it went unheard in the noise of the city. I took a right turn to an alley corner to see a florist shop. The shop didn’t seem to be opened yet. It wasn’t that I suddenly saw the store but rather it was if I discovered it afterwards.
Inside the florist shop, there was construction still being done and the owner was organizing his documents. At that time, I had no real expectations. I had already travelled to several places, but not one florist knew of the flower’s existence. I could see a flower that had similar colours. However, I wasn’t looking for a flower with similar colours. The flowers had to be real. The owner looked at me for quite a bit when he heard the name of the flower and said that the florist shop isn’t officially open but he could deliver it to me. “Why do you need this flower?”
I thought about it again as I turned the handle and got back on the road. I have a reason for needing that flower. There is only one reason. I want to make the person I give it to happy. I want to make the person smile. I want to be seen as a good person. I want to be a good person.
so here, this is when Seokjin picks up the bouquet of the Smeraldo flowers and he intends to give it to the girl who could be seen from the highlight reels, and who we would see later would be in a car accident.
look at this from S version of the HYYH the Notes.
Seokjin
30 August YEAR 22
She seemed flustered when she thought she lost her diary. Her favourite movie, her favourite place to go, her favorite flowers to even her dreams appear on every future page being turned. It was something that I had done for her. The words ‘Sorry’ didn’t come out easily. The red diary laid between us at the intersection.
I wanted to give her happiness. I wanted to make her laugh. I wanted to be someone she would like. I thought that if I followed the words in the diary, I would be that person. But that wasn’t the case. I became more scared when I became someone else. I really don’t want to be caught (for being me). I don’t want disappointment to follow afterwards. Desperately, I turned my head away to hide myself. But just as one cannot put a full stop to a sentence without subject, the me who could not improve himself and continued to wander in the same place.
Now, I know. The me who lacks, makes mistakes and fails is all part of me afterall. No matter how cruel or how merciless things are, by being true to myself would I, only be able to move forward. I stood up from my position and she didn’t try to grab me.
I walked out to the street and removed my hat. As I run my fingers through my hair, all the time spent trying to be someone else slipped through my fingers. I lifted my head and saw my reflection in the mirror. A frail face, pale lips and thin shoulders. I looked unkempt. I laughed. The me in the mirror laughed too.
the introduction of his lover/partner is back, much like the highlight reels.
anyway, looking at the notes from Tear, on this day Seokjin seems to realize that the girl has died right in front of him.
Seokjin
30 August YEAR 22
Can anyone remember the moment they fell in love. Can anyone predict the moment this love ended. What is the reason that humans are not be able to recognize these moments. And why was I given the power to undo all these things?
The car comes to a sudden stop, headlights flashing, bouncing, falling. The one who was standing there amongst the noisy moments, defenseless, was me. I couldn’t hear anything, I couldn’t sense anything at all. Though it was summer, the breeze was cold. There was the sound of something tumbling down along the road. Also, there was a scent of a flower. It was only then did a sense of reality came back to me. The bouquet of Smeraldo flowers fell from my hand. The lady was the only one in the middle of the road. Blood was spilling out from her head. Dark red blood was flowing onto the road. I thought then. If only I could turn back time.
this is as seen in the highlight reels in which he was supposed to give the flowers to her but when she crossed, a car hit her.
I believe that the whole HYYH timeline was initially about brotherhood, hence the whole high school context and their crap together hence all these fond memories and pairings.
anything before YEAR 22 could be treated as background information, mainly context on all the stories of the boys and to understand the nature of their pairings, be it originally from I Need U or the ones in the Wings concept photos.
but amidst everything, if you compare the notes with the webtoon, April 11 YEAR 22 is the most overlapping factor.
May 22 YEAR 22 is when Taehyung supposedly dies; or commits suicide, yet when you see in Euphoria, assuming it’s the same date, Seokjin takes over or kind of replaces him instead.
every time Seokjin’s face cracks or any part of him cracks, he goes back to April 11, assuming its April 11, as if his reality shatters. it’s almost like a sick game. this could be seen in Blood, Sweat and Tears and Wings VCR Tour.
hence maybe why in BST, his face cracks more often. yet until now I cant figure out the reason for the huge pile of clothes etc from Spring Day. but time to think about it.
but everything beyond that around June/July, HYYH timeline shifts and is more centered around the boy’s relationships with the girls.. hence highlight reels..
I honestly don’t think this whole concept mattered in the first place but it’s kinda forced in since they went through with it now lmao, as in the concept of introducing lovers inside. I think the reason why they introduced this is because of the whole idea of love yourself, before you love others, love yourself first.
but anyway, during the highlight reels period, bighit hires more writers to kinda continue the story line and so they introduced love interests ( like they had applications lmao ). Hence, this is the only reason I could think of that they are even continuing this whole timeline until now as they hired more people to do it and work on it.
Also, if you noticed in the Smeraldo: the Notes, it has BU, which i would either assume is Bangtan Universe, BTS Universe or Bighit Universe just like how there is YG Family, JYP Nation and SM Town.
now, if it is indeed BTS Universe, you could imagine that this is just a whole world of AUs, lots of parallels, much like a marvel universe. however, if this was the bighit universe, then best believe me when I say that should the boys ever go into military/enlistment or despite being exempted, want to serve, trust me that bighit would milk TXT and rope them into this universe.
it is possible considering how they kinda planned the whole debut date, 2013 and 2019 having the exact same year literally, just the change in the last number of the 4 digits. i wouldn’t be surprised. think of TXT as a possible AU should this happen, not that I am trying to compare them, I believe they have their own colour, but I wouldn't be surprised if they get roped in to be part of this complex story line.
i still kinda believe that HYYH should have ended by maybe around Wings, others thought that it should have ended in their repackage album of Young Forever, but i guess to one’s own perception.
i just kinda want to see how this would end, especially since they are releasing the HYYH: the Notes Book. and the whole webtoon would end just in time for their first ever comeback April 12, one day after the webtoon ends on April 11.
i want to see if i would even have my answers after all. especially now with their upcoming comeback called Map of the Soul: Persona, best believe a new theory would be out soon.
[Photo Source] Bighit Entertainment
Credits: maxine ☕️ DO NOT REPOST ©
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BTS in Singapore #LoveYourselfSG
I don’t know who would even wanna read about a concert that happened A MONTH AGO. But if you are still keen, hey ho.
*I’m gonna recount the entire day in great detail, so please feel free to skip any details if you don’t care about it.*
disclaimer: all pics & videos are not mine unless stated, credit goes to bts/bighit/fansites/fans
For reference, I was at yellow 1 (left side of the extended stage)
On the night before the concert, it still felt unreal. I was surprisingly calm and I was even watching 聲林之王 with glenn (who stayed over) 😂 I thought I wouldn’t be able to sleep but I ended up falling asleep at around 3 am.
19 January, 6.00am: My eyes opened and I was sooooo effing tired LOL. I swear I was in a daze all the way till the actual concert. We got ready and proceeded to leave the house at 8 am. Once I arrived at the stadium, there were fans everywhere. The group of us (carol, mingyou, glenn and I) decided to grab a cup of tea/coffee to wake ourselves up and I don’t know how, but it was already past 9 am by the time we bought our drinks. Glenn and I went to collect the various fansupport items (a cool thing about kpop concerts is the amount of free stuff given out by fans) and we went to find glenn’s roommate who had been queuing for merch since 6am.
At 10.30 am, glenn and I went to register for soundcheck. The place we were at (outdoor area outside astons) had various dance cover groups, which was actually a pretty good form of entertainment to pass the time. After we were done with registration, glenn had to pick up an item she had ordered from a fansite, which we had a hell of a difficult time trying to find because the stadium is so freaking big. We had to speed walk to queue for soundcheck right after, as we were already late (queueing started at 12.30pm and it was almost 1pm)
SOUNDCHECK:
That was basically my reaction when BTS walked out.
Even though they were in casual clothes and had no makeup on, (Jhope even tweeted about it!!!), in my mind they looked like this as they were walking over to us HAHAHA:
They performed three songs in total: mic drop, dna and run. I went in assuming they would each be rehearsing their solos, so I wasn’t expecting those three songs to be chosen. But, it makes total sense because these are the more hype songs. My memory is slowly fading so I’ll let drake illustrate how I felt during the soundcheck.
When they all stood in one line right in front of me:
When I heard the opening note of mic drop:
KIM NAMJOON, KIM SEOKJIN, MIN YOONGI, JUNG HOSEOK, PARK JIMIN, KIM TAEHYUNG, JEON JUNGKOOK, BTS!!!!!!!
**when I heard the whistling in DNA**
*run plays*
me: YAAAAAAAAS BICTH
me realising midway that bts is real and I’m actually seeing them like wtaf-
armys after the soundcheck:
I don’t know how I ever got so lucky winning soundcheck passes, but I wanna thank all the lords and the universe for awarding BOTH glenn and I this opportunity. Soundcheck is truly such an intimate experience because you get to experience bts in all their natural glory. Even though this was just a rehearsal, it felt like a mini concert and I even told glenn that I’d be fine if I didn’t go for their concert and I can die happy lmaoooo.
Brief soundcheck tidbits (you can read the rest here):
1) Jin looks THE best without makeup, he has such good skin and I swear this man is really really handsome in person. I’ll admit I never bought into the worldwide handsome hype before, but I’m a convert now.
2) Jin kept looking at glenn and I several times and he was FULL ON staring. It wasn’t even a brief glance, it was as if I owed him money and he was waiting for me to return it to him (yes jin i owe u my money and life). I kept wondering if I was delusional (aren’t we all, tbh). To be fair, I think jin was also looking at the barricades behind us and/or staring into space, but this man definitely looked me straight in the eye. How did I survive? I didn’t, I’m typing from my grave
3) hobi glows in person, and he’s really not called the sun for nothing. He was the first one to walk out on stage and he had the biggest smile plastered on his face the entire time. Sunshine radiates from this man with every move he makes. Alongside joon, he was the one speaking the most and leading the members.
Ok, so storytime. There were supposed to be 1000 soundcheck winners but when we entered, there was NO way that there were 1000 of us. Our area had probably around 100 - 150 people max and the same goes for the other side. During the concert ment time, jungkook mentioned that there were only 200++ fans at soundcheck. The moment he said that, glenn and I turned to each other and went “HUH?” and we clowned him because we thought he couldn’t math... (sorry jk bro for doubting you oops). As it turns out, about 800 soundcheck passes were cancelled because they were obtained through special means and connections. AND, the reason they looked really tired/sad at soundcheck was because they were expecting 1000 fans and they probably thought they couldn’t even fill up that amount. :( fuck you scalpers, fuck you snakes staff, but I’m glad bighit decided to cancel all those tickets because those fools dont deserve it and also more space for us soundcheck winners muahahaha.
Before I delve into the concert experience, I need to vent about my stupidity and anger at myself. **CAUTION: RANT AHEAD** So, the standing ticket holders were let in to the venue from 4 pm onwards, and we happily found a spot to settle in and chill. (it was definitely NOT chill in our pit, but that’s another story) At around 6.30pm, everyone decided to stand up officially. Fast forward 15 minutes, I went into full panic mode because I needed to pee. Usually, I’ll just hold it in but my stomach was feeling quite queasy (I’ve been having a lot of stomach issues since november). I also didn’t wanna watch the entire concert with the constant urge to pee because that’s so fun, right?
It just SO happened that mingyou and carol were talking about going to the back to watch the concert so I said fuck it, I’ll just go to the toilet and stand at the back too.
Went to the toilet to pee and ta-da, ONLY TWO FREAKING DROPS OF PEE CAME OUT. I was so pissed at myself (my body really) because it made me leave my front spot for nothing. But, what’s done was done. I told myself that hey, at least you can finally breathe now (while internally cursing). **RANT OVER**
CONCERT:
Even though I’ve watched so many fancams from their concert, NOTHING will ever beat the experience of watching it in person. I got GOOSEBUMPS when the first note of idol played and they all rose from the platform. Till this day, I STILL get goosebumps rewatching any idol fancams because of that exact moment.
me watching the IDOL opening stage for the 94919994th time:
I was watching IDOL from the back with carol and mingyou, and I was truly thankful that I had the space to dance and go wild. But, that feeling lasted briefly because I realised I was so damn far from the stage. BTS was performing most of their choreographed songs at the purple main stage so even if I was at my original spot, I still wouldn’t be able to see them. The huge led screens existed for that very reason, but my stubborn ass was adamant on watching them on the stage instead of seeing them through a screen.
me deciding to squeeze my way back in again:
After IDOL, it was time for their intro ment (introducing themselves, saying a few comments the usual stuff). Immediately after, they performed save me/I’m fine. I don’t know why my idiotic ass thought this was a good time to squeeze my way in when I should have been FOCUSED on my boys. I was basically half watching them, half saying sorry excuse me to strangers. *bows head deeply and slaps self*
Ok moving on.... I really freaking love how they created the transition from save me to I’m fine. The part where tae gets up into a bridge position was b-e-a-u-t-i-f-u-l. For some reason, he looked particularly breathtaking doing this move at this very concert. The beauty of live performances, indeed.
Personally, tae stood out in save me/I’m fine the most.
Magic Shop was next, which surprised me because I forgot that it was so early in the setlist. Hence, I was NOT ready for the incoming wave of emotions.
“so show me, I’ll show you” will forever remain one of the most iconic lines in the fandom 😭😭😭 I think I would have cried if this song was played towards the end of the concert.
As per tradition, a subunit vcr is played before each members solos. So the order goes hopekook, minjoon, tae and yoonjin (yoonjin was too!! much!! to handle because it was 2 separate screens and I didn’t know where to look at???)
Jungkook: Euphoria
(aiyooo look at them cheeks *pinch*)
I love how this has now become our official fanchant (for context). Euphoria is one of my fave intros after seesaw and my ears were in for a treat that night. (It was also at this point I decided to just stay in my current spot instead of trying to find glenn). Jungkook sounds amazing live and this made me realise that wow, he really deserves the main vocalist title.
As most fans would have known, Jungkook was so exhausted at the seoul music awards, which was a mere few days before the concert. Naturally, I was worried that kook would push himself too much in sg. I could tell he was definitely a little worn out, but he still gave it his all (bcos its jungkook) and delivered an impressive performance. I’m truly happy I’ve witnessed euphoria live 😍
J-Hope: Just Dance
JUNG HO SEOK, YOU GOOD??? J-hope showed me what the term bias wrecker really meant that night. I think EVERYONE left the stadium that night rethinking their bias list (if you didn’t, you’re lying). His stage presence and charisma is out of this world. Everyone knows he’s a good dancer, but seeing him executing those moves in person is REALLY something else.
my face during the entire performance
when he walked over to the extended stage, I was like
WHO IS HE? HE’S J-HOOOOOOOOPE! LOUDER!
I Need U + Run
I honestly don’t remember much from this except for THE vmon moment because they were kinda all over the place. They started at the main stage, then came over to the extended stage and were just dancing their hearts out freely. The members were all splashing water (Idk how they do it so nicely, I’ll probably just hit someone’s head with the bottle) and there was a water cannon. The water cannon was SOOOO strong, I and the people around me were caught off guard (rip my hair & makeup). Bighit probably knew mosh pit fans were sweaty as hell so they wanted us to take a bath. How nice of them.
I loooooveee the outfits they wore here. I’m not a fan of all white ensembles but on bts, I’ll make an exception. They look like ethereal angels who've descended down to earth for one day to grace us with their presence. I’M HERE FOR IT.
look at all da sparkles (and jimin’s messy hair uwu)
Jimin: Serendipity
Till this day, jimin remains my favourite performer in bts. Whenever I watch a bts performance, my eyes automatically go straight to jimin. As a contemp dancer trained in ballet, you can see how that has shaped his performances. Fluidity is the term I would use to describe his style, because he moves like he’s gliding through water. I often find myself rewatching his fancams the most because he has so much adaptibility, its crazy. He knows when to go hard and when to reel it back in. Jimin has such pretty dance lines as well. He stands out because he really pays attention to the little details (the turn of a foot, the hand placement, arch of a back)
Out of all the solos, serendipity is really the prettiest. The combination of jimin’s glitter shirt + pastel hair + bubbles really was a feast for the eyes 😍
See what I mean? Jimin looks so picturesque even in motion.
Trivia: Love
As glenn pointed out, Joon looks so much softer in person (he’s a real life koya 😭). In person, his features are much softer and ‘rounder’. While he may have soft features (how many times can I use the word soft), his stage presence is a huge contrast. I’ve often noticed that out of everyone, joon is the most focused member during performances. While the others will interact with fans/try to incorporate some kind of fan service, rm concentrates solely on carrying out what he’s supposed to do. I can respect that.
Ugh!!! This man!!! Honestly, I was a little worried joon wouldn’t get the hype and cheers he rightfully deserves but Singapore impressed me. Well done, my fellow countrymen (and foreign fans). There was a girl beside me who screamed super loud and kept yelling “KIM NAMJOON!!!!!” so I was like HELLLL YEAH OKAY FINALLY SOMEONE AS HYPED AS ME LEGGO. Jungkook making a heart at the end with namjoon was so cute uwu. Everyone collectively lost their shit when joon slid his jacket off over one shoulder. King of giving the people what they want, I see you.
**another thing to note is how he always looks SOOO happy performing love. You can see the genuine happiness radiating off this man. It makes me happy too 🤗
DNA
The main talking point of this performance was that jimin fell. I actually missed it, because I could only see their side view and jimin was blocked from my pov. By the time I looked at the screen, jimin was already on the floor (still smiling bcos he’s jimin) and I was like oh nooooooo. Apparently after that, they coordinated among themselves mid song to tell each other not to do the ending choreo. A PLUS TEAMWORK, RIGHT THERE! tae even went to wipe the floor after the performance, bless his precious soul.
sidenote: I love love their dna outfits, especially the jackets!! They had different ones for the america and europe concerts, but I do love the asia tour ones just a little more.
Medley
The other highlight of the concert happened here because I was reunited with glenn!!!!!!! I found her just when they launched into fire and we were like OOOOOMMMMGGGG YAS. I actually gave up on ever finding her, but I suddenly saw her blouse from the corner of my eye (THANK YOU GLENN FOR WEARING A PINK DAISY TOP). During the medley, everyone kept following wherever the boys went because the boys were on the moving stage. I felt like I was at a wave pool getting pushed without even moving. They were right at the back at the small diamond stage, so I couldn’t really see much. I had no choice but to watch from the screen.
funny moments: tae doing pubg dances LOOOL , rm’s legendary hip thrust (you’re welcome)
Airplane Pt. 2
I.. actually forgot that this song was on the setlist. It felt really anti climatic and I wish they would have arranged this to be after DNA or something.
*airplane pt 2 comes on
me:
Jokes aside, I do love this song. It was even one of my top songs in 2018 according to spotify.
V: Singularity
For the first and only time during the concert, this made me speechless. Normally, I’d be cheering and singing along to all of the songs. BUT man oh man, I couldn’t tear my eyes away from tae. While jimin is my favourite performer to watch, I believe that tae is the most expressive performer in bts. Whenever I watch him, I realise that wow that’s really a celebrity right there. Its easy to dress up and put on a show, but not everyone can really perform. What separates a regular person from a star is the x factor, and taehyung is the perfect embodiment of that.
Look
at
that
duality
Fake Love
First off, how did I not notice jhope was wearing leather gloves???? Fake love is still that bitch, no matter what anyone says. It gave us goth bangtan and that’s all I could ever ask for.
I wasn’t expecting them to perform the rock version, and I LOVE IT. I’ve probably watched all of their fake love performances, but seeing it live just solidified it as my fave title track from the love yourself series.
Funny anecdote: jungkook didn’t lift his shirt up like he usually does and I swear the people around me were disappointed. They didn’t outrightly say anything, but I could feel the sadness 😂
Suga: Seesaw
ALRIGHT, SHE DROPPED THE CHEESECAKE TIME. Seesaw is my fave solo so you bet your sweet ass this bitch was excited AF!
Singapore did good for the seesaw fanchants, I’m so proud of us *wipes away tear* yoongi definitely noticed our efforts and smiled so freaking wide when he heard us (he absolutely has THE cutest gummy smile).
I remember the entire fandom (me included) got shookt to the core when yoongi first debuted the seesaw performance. We were like ‘suga dancing??’ Seesaw as a song itself was already a pretty unconventional fit for yoongi. We were all used to his hard hitting rap songs (agust d says hi) so we were really surprised. But, you can see how much fun yoongi always has whenever he’s performing seesaw and I’m thankful that he reversed our expectations with this song.
Jin: Epiphany
THIS MAN, yes I am suing. His name is Kim Seok Jin. How dare he make me feel all of the feels when I specifically told him not to? Hearing 50,000 people singing “I’m the one I should love in this world” together was truly a historical moment (just hear how it sounds from OUTSIDE the stadium). Seeing Jin channel all of his emotions into this song was heartbreaking, yet cathartic at the same itme. I would have full on ugly cried but all the screaming probably killed the mood.
the gaze of a man who knows the power he holds, ugh I stan
Epiphany is such a perfect song, 10/10. I don’t know what else to say because nothing I ever say will compare to the experience of actually watching it live. I love you, jin (no hetero)
The Truth Untold
v, jimin, jungkook, jin are the nation’s vocalists
thank you for coming to my ted talk
I could barely hear tae at the start because of his mic, which was a shame :( Aside from that, everyone sounded really great. TTU is a song that can strain your voice if not done properly. There were definitely some concerts where some of them struggled to reach the high notes or the correct key. One thing’s for sure though - Jin has CONSISTENTLY been singing in perfect pitch and ALWAYS delivers a fantastic performance. Jin’s singing is so stable, it deserves more recognition. I love tae’s ad lib here and how he made everyone lose their marbles after.
Outro: Tear
HANDS DOWN, FAVE PERFORMANCE OF THE NIGHT!!!!! I walked out of the concert still thinking about tear, because it was THAT powerful. I’m glad glenn was beside me for this because she’s the only other tear enthusiast I know (TEAM SENN ✊🏼). BTS individually have amazing stage charisma, but put the three rappers together and you get AN UNDENIABLE FORCE. I’ll always stan rap line till the day I die. The three of them have such different rapping styles, yet nothing sounds out of place when they work together.
yoongi in headbands is so hot, no one fight me on this
Mic Drop
Second fave performance of the night! (okay I might be slightly biased, since it was right after tear) Even though this was nearing the end of the concert, I was actually way more energetic than I was at the start. It was like I was saving all my energy stores for this very moment. When joon mentioned it was their last song, I was like NOOOOOOOOO WAIT WHAT YOU CAN’T LEAVE YET. Then, I remembered that there was an encore segment and the world was all right again.
I see you stylists with the second white ensemble of the night, and I raise you one. Mic drop is the song that can get anyone hyped up anywhere. I feel like this is the song that you can play at clubs / festivals and it wont feel out of place. Fun story: the dj at dpr live’s show played mic drop and everyone was lowkey jamming to it (also shout out to all the armys there)
Please watch jhope’s fancam!!! I’ve always felt that mic drop is one of the few songs that allows him to really shine as a dancer. As a hip hop dancer, he doesn’t get many opportunities to showcase it because he has to ‘tone down’ for bts choreos. If you have the time, do check out all of his hopeonthestreet videos to really see dancer hoseok in his element!
mandatory iconic yoongi mic drop
Encore Stage (So What & Anpanman)
All of the cutest and funniest interactions took place right here!!! Before the concert, I was going back and forth between getting purple or yellow tickets but I definitely do NOT regret getting yellow tickets! The extended stage is where you can see their goofy selves come out to play.
joon + jimin’s cheeks: an untold love story
p.s. joon was casually applying lip balm before this moment, lol
me whenever minjoon minjoons
this is peak joon at his final form
jimin got to start anpanman this time!!
cosmo and wanda (I mean vmin) being the absolute cutest
chaotic duo taejin back at it again
vmon was being very very cute during anpanman & so what!! There were so many vmon moments throughout the concert, THANK YOU UNIVERSE for blessing me with the most underrated ship.
noteworthy moments during the encore stage:
-sope freaking looked at glenn and I, and we almost combusted right there. Both of them came over to our side at one point, and stepped down onto this black box platform just below (no wonder they felt so close). Almost everyone else were on their phones, so naturally they noticed us because we were the only two crazy bitches cheering by ourselves. I MADE EYE CONTACT AND THAT’S ALL THAT MATTERS. suga smiled so hard when he saw us going all out, and that’s when I knew: I was yoongi’s bitch for life. jhope was looking at us with a sort of approval *stands at attention* YES SIR ARMY REPORTING FOR DUTY
-jungkook came over to our side of the stage and was just in right front of me. I took this time to really look at his face (HAHA) because I felt like I didn’t see him enough during the concert. He was doing body rolls (looked a little something like this) and everyone around me was busy trying to get his attention. Upon closer ‘inspection’ of jungkook, I have concluded that he is a 5 year old trapped in a 20 year old ripped body. His body proportions are reeeealllyy crazily good - with his tiny waist and long legs (and veiny arms). I can see why people lose their mind over him, but he’ll always remain an adorable bunny to me.
-I got blessed by yoongi’s holy water during so what. I didn’t think I was gonna be close enough to get the water but I GUESS NOT! I’ve never been happier getting splashed with water in my life. I swear, yoongi was so cute bouncing around and just smiling the whole time (I can’t stop talking about yoongi, SO SUE ME)
this is what jungkook looks like in person, can you believe? Fansite pictures are always heavily edited (especially jungkook’s for some reason) so sometimes they can come across as quite ‘fake looking’ when you look at images. Lemme tell you, they look a thousand times better in person. The melanin, the glow, the messy hair, their natural skin - can we get a hallelujah
Final Ment
Their final ment before we parted ways :((( I do enjoy hearing them speak even if its in korean, because you get to listen to their thoughts and feelings. I also really appreciate their attempt in speaking english, because it shows that they care. They might have memorised what to say, but effort goes a long way!
- tae saying we are part of his story, memory and scenery 😭😭😭 who knew it would be a teaser for his song! that sly kid. give it a listen over here, you won’t regret it.
- jungkook saying that the fans at soundcheck (*raises hands* YES IT ME) cheered crazily good. yasss thank you kook for acknowledging us and trust me, you could have just ten armys and we’ll still cheer like 10,000 people!
yoongi was being so freaking cute and for what?? that little pout before he launched into his speech.... HERE TAKE MY HEART
the best part was yoongi correcting the translator (not good night, GREAT night) man’s fluent in english but never shows it off, I approve of this slytherin move. yoongi even mentioned that he thought there was a day 2 concert. live nation, what are you doing??? I was so looking forward to a day 2 concert too. Is minstradamus predicting a 2 day concert in Singapore in the future?? 👀
jin is a sagittarius in every sense of the word. the way he waited for his close up before slowly removing his shades.....I’m honestly not surprised anymore. I’m too used to having so many sagittarius in my life LOL. he even attempted to speak singlish not once, but twice. I sincerely applaud the effort, though my greedy self wished every member tried too (I’m still waiting for jimin to say ‘ zuo mo ni jiang bad de’)
speaking of jimin, he sang promise!! for the first time!! live!! singapore was truly blessed :)))))
thank you God for spending a little more time on this fine specimen, jung hoseok. hoseok is fine, but with his forehead exposed? FINE FINE. *cue me singing I’m fine* everyone was chanting “J Hope! J Hope! J Hope!’ even before he spoke and he was like oooooh, me? while pointing at himself like pls hobi ITS ALL FOR YOU BBY.
yes, you have stolen my heart jung hoseok
I can’t believe this man even bothered to count the days and meals for his speech..... (I like how bts pretends music bank didnt exist LMAO) this man can honestly sell you a trash bag with how eloquent he is. english is his second/third language yet he can construct better sentences in english than I ever will. in Jeon Jungkook’s words “Kim Namjoon, you dangerous man”
Answer: Love Myself (aka THE END CRIES)
At last, the final song dawned upon us. This is it, the moment reality hits you. That we’re all gonna return to our sad little lives after the concert. I was expecting myself to cry, but I actually felt... at peace? Hearing them sing “I should love myself” also served as a final reminder that that is also the title of their world tour, and the key message to take away from the love yourself series. At the end of the day, bts are also 7 young men in their 20s struggling alongside the rest of us. They have their own battles to fight too, but at least we’re all in this together. BTS may be there to provide us with happiness and love, but we must never forget to look inward first. 💜
Welcome, first time experiencing singapore’s humidity?
Singapore air’s just that powerful huh
I got chills, they’re multiplying!
Ngl, Singapore really impressed me. Every member’s solo got the same deserving amount of screams and we even got seesaw’s part down! (yoongi was really happy huhu) I don’t think they nor us fans expected such an enthusiastic response, but I hope this lifted their spirits up. Touring non stop for months is no easy feat, and I hope our passion made them less weary for one night. I still feel extremely blessed that I got to see them so quickly after I became a full-fledged fan. Hope to see you boys real soon! 😁😁😁
p.s. I recommend reading glenn’s experience here, because it is MUCH more detailed and well articulated
p.p.s link to jimin fancams, link to j-hope fancams, link to rm tear fancam
To end off, here are some random/cute pics for your enjoyment ~
me shaking off all the sweat, filth and water out of my hair after the concert
grandpa over flowers
hello glenn, this is for you
LOOK at jungkook’s forearms.... he can literally kill us all
The cameraman was WHIPPED for tae that night, it kept focusing on tae for a good chunk of time (I can’t blame him/her, we were all in awe too)
Singapore is officially J-hope land now. Can he run for president next?
Thank you for giving me a night I will never forget
190119 will forever be etched in my memory 💜💜💜💜💜💜💜
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