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#sorry please just ignore me

baselicoc · 11 months

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i know that atsv and spiderverse in general is probably not including Gabe for various reasons and therefore when Mig took his alt selfs place he wasnt actually leaving anyone behind. he said something along the lines of “i found a universe where i was happy” which kinda screams that something was fucked up with his home one, i’d like to think more than usual because the other explanation is that he just left like all his family behind. Which is extremely messed up but also on the other hand a little funny

like imagine being gabe here. Imagine your older brother fucks off to another universe because of his depression and comes back with even worse depression ranting some shit about canon events. You have to be told where he went by his AI because god knows your brother has all the communication skills of a rusty spoon. Have to be told he fucking left with no intention of coming back

#spiderman #sm2099 #miguel o'hara #gabriel o’ hara #miguel #like i never expect gabe to be in anything honestly hes my little guy but sm2099 adaptations hate him sometimes #not even going to start talking about the other sm2099 supporting characters but #the idea of gabe just. having his brother fuck off but then also come back with more issues. drives me insane #and you fuckin KNOW this guy would barely communicate a thing gabe would have to bully half of it out of mig and get the other half from lyl #but also. since i mentioned supporting cast. if kasey and hobie ever met its fuckin over for everyone #sm2099 brainworms hitting me so bad since atsv #in atsv they would be even more dysfunctional than their worst comic moments #atsv #silly little textposts #please feel free to ignore this im just obsessed with messed up sibling relationships #Mig comes back to “welcome home cheater” on every wall of his apartment #atsv spoilers #<- SORRY I FORGOR

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slicznymartwy · 8 months

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I’m not sure if your comfortable with it, but if it’s alright, can I request Billy Lenz and the reader (established relationship) having some sort of conversation on his past and the reader comforting him?

this one is rlly sad im sorry :(( this is mostly hc since i've only ever watched the original 1974 film, so idk if this lines up with the canon from the other movies. from what i know about it, i think it's similar. no mention of agnes in this warning: sa of a minor mention, please do not read if that bothers you. also, reader insert was abused/beaten by their mom. very sad take care of yourselves please

☾⋆⁺₊ billy lenz x gn!reader

Night fills your bedroom and coats itself on the floors and walls, except for where the yellow streetlamp spills in past your curtains. Sparing a glance to the alarm clock on your bedside table, you see the time is so late it could already be considered early.

Still, you can’t think about sleep; not when Billy is laying beside you and the house is blissfully empty, two things so rare that it almost seems serendipitous. You’re not one to look a gift horse in the mouth, so you keep staring at the ceiling and let the warmth of his body radiate into yours.

“Billy,” you whisper into the quiet room. “Are you asleep?”

You can hear him grunt and squirm beside you, and you feel bad for waking him. It wasn’t often he got a full night’s rest on a bed, and you knew for a fact that there was no mattress in the attic. There were only so many chances to have Billy and the house all to yourself, though, and you don’t want to squander it.

“Billy,” you say again, nudging him with your foot.

He grunts again, but it sounds more cognisant than before. He reaches over himself to pat your arm, almost like he’s quieting down a noisy cat, and you can feel his hand trail down to your own. His palm covers the back of your hand, and he threads his fingers in between yours, curling them down together.

It’s a gesture so sweet that you’re tempted to let him fall back asleep. There’s no helping your addiction to him, though, and you tighten your fingers on top of his.

“I’m not tired,” you say with a pout. “I wanna talk.”

This time, Billy groans, low and long. You think it might be out of annoyance, but you can feel him stretching out beside you, straightening his long legs underneath the covers. He huffs when he’s done, eyes blinking open.

You love his pretty eyes, an orangey amber that you were always getting lost in, no matter how unsettling they could be. It always felt like he was staring into you, like he could see the marrow in your bones.

You loved his intensity. It made you feel alive when the rest of the world was tired and grey.

“Hi,” you say, reaching over with you unoccupied hand to touch his jaw. “I didn’t ask before. How was your day?”

He’s quiet for a long time, and you wonder if he can fall asleep with his eyes open, but then he says, “Bad.”

The word hangs in the air. Billy’s face gives up nothing, a blank page with no words of his own to say. You frown and pull your hand back from his face to rest on your own chest. The other stays in his hold, neither of you willing to let go.

“I’m sorry. Do you want to talk about it?” you ask, although it doesn’t surprise you when Billy shakes his head against your pillow.

“Okay.” You squeeze against his fingers again, pulling gently on his arm so that it rested more heavily on top of you. The bedroom air is quiet, but your mind continues to race. It’ll be good for him to get it off his chest, you tell yourself.

“Is it something old or something new?”

He thinks about your words for a while, but then you hear him mutter, “Old.”

“Bad memories?” you ask, looking back at him. He blinks at you, then nods.

“I get bad memories, too.” You lean against him slightly, and glance up at the ceiling. “From when you were a kid?”

This time, Billy shrugs. You know you shouldn’t push him, but your heart aches to see him hurt and to not have the rememdy.

You turn around and let go of him for only a moment. You search for his hand again, this time with the opposite one to press your hands together, palm to palm. Your fingers entwine so easily, so naturally, that it makes your heart ache.

Maybe he just needs to know he’s not alone in whatever bullshit he’s had to endure in his life. Maybe it will help to know that you have bad memories too.

“My mom used to hit me,” you admit quietly. You stare at the way your hands mesh together, with your nails polished and Billy’s own chewed up. “She used to take my stepdad’s belt and hit me with it. Used to just be the leather part, but then she would swing the buckle at me too. She broke a tooth, but it was just a baby one. My adult teeth grew in alright.”

You keep your voice casual as you speak, because facts are facts, and there’s no reason to get upset about something you can’t change anymore. Besides, you reminesce about your childhood so infrequently that it feels like it all happened to another person.

You remember the beatings like you’re watching it happen to someone else – something else, because you don’t feel bad for them when they can’t sit at school because of the welts on their ass. You don’t bat an eye when their mom has to take them to the doctor to reset their broken nose.

“Bitch,” Billy spits out from beside you, and you have to laugh at the venom dripping in his voice.

“I don’t talk to her anymore,” you tell him, smiling sadly. You glance at him, but it’s hard to look at the mean look on his face. It probably isn’t for you, but your mind is traitorous and too sensitive.

Even worse, Billy could be mad on your behalf. No, you can’t think about that either, not when you’ve spent so long pretending that it didn’t really happen.

“Anyways. All that to say, I know what it’s like, having bad memories. You don’t have to tell me, just… I’m here for you,” you say, running your thumb along his hand where they’re still locked together.

“Want to,” he mutters, voice croaking unnaturally as he speaks in his own voice.

Quietly, you release his hand and instead wrap yourself around him, laying partially on top. He lets out a heavy sigh as you settle, with your arm coming up to rest by his head and your same-side leg resting over his hips. He watches the ceiling, and you watch his face from where you lay your ear to his chest

“Bad billy. Disgusting,” he mutters, and you pet his cheek with the back of your hand.

“I don’t think so.” You keep your voice careful and quiet, but he sighs and its agitated. Pent up memories start to overfill, and you can see it on his face.

“Mommy,” he starts, but his voice breaks and he coughs to clear his throat. “Mom. Fucking hate her. I hate her. Stupid fucking slut. She’s disgusting. Not me. Not Billy.”

You take your hand away from his face, watching how his expression continues to contort, mixing between anger and disgust and fear. It wrenches your heart in your chest.

“You’ve been so good, Billy. You’re not disgusting.”

“I hate her. I hate her,” he chants again. “Oh, Billy! Shut up!”

When he says his own name, it sounds like a feminine moan. You almost don’t understand, but the implication dawns on you only a moment later. It’s not difficult to piece it all together: his rage, the names he calls himself, the moan. You feel sick.

“Hey, we can stop,” you try gently, but Billy either doesn’t hear you or doesn’t want to stop.

“No one needs to know, Billy. Be a good boy.” You can’t look at his face anymore, the ugly way it scrunches up hurts you down to you core. Guilt claws at you from inside, and you wish you knew the right thing to say but you don’t. The truth, you decide, is enough for now.

“I hate her, too,” you tell him, and it sounds a little wet. You don’t let yourself cry, but your heart breaks for a younger Billy, afraid and confused.

“That’s my mom,” he says. You don’t know what he’s trying to convey when he says that – if he wants you to pity her, or if he’s sharing his betrayal with you. He whines, a painfully soft noise that gets trapped in his throat.

Gently, carefully, you card your fingers through his hair where you can reach, and you kiss his shoulder.

“She’s gone. She can’t hurt you anymore,” you tell him, although you don’t know if it’s true. You do know that, as long as you’re by his side, there’s no way you’ll let that woman touch him again.

“I wish I could kill her,” he says through clenched teeth. His voice is thick, like he might be crying. You can’t bare to look. Billy’s grief melts into you like it’s thermodynamics, heat into cold, and you can only hope that you can take some of his and ease his mind.

“How would you do it?” you whisper, pressing your hand over his hammering chest.

“Cut… cut her head off. Smash it like a pumpkin. Oh, Billy! Good boy, Billy. Shut up!” His voice breaks when he shouts. He coughs, then gasps for air, his breath shaking as he fights against the tightenness in his throat. “I’ll turn her teeth into pumpkin seeds,” he snarls.

Without warning, you move yourself to lay completely on top of him, pressing against his body with your body weight. He groans, and you’re sure you must be squishing him, but he doesn’t complain. In fact, his arms come up around you, hooked under your arms and pressing you against him with his hands at your shoulders.

“I’ve got you,” you tell him, pressing your face against his neck. “You’re okay now. It’s just us in here. Just me and you.”

“I hate her,” he whimpers again. “I hate her. I hate her.”

You don’t say anything, because you don’t think there are any words that could possible take away his hurt without also being a complete lie. Underneath your body, you can feel Billy start to relax, grounded back to reality from the rotten memories playing in his head.

“I’m sorry today was a bad day. We can have a good one tomorrow,” you say. It’s an impossible thing to promise, but you mean it like one. You’ll make sure Billy has a good day, whether fate wants it or not.

“Okay,” he murmurs. “I’ll kill your mom too.”

“Thank you,” you say. You kiss his temple, and he leans into your lips.

a/n: reblogs and replies are really appreciated

#billy lenz #black christmas (1974)#billy lenz x reader #slasher x reader #₊*. ⋆༘ — requests #i'm sorry if the pov changes anywhere accidentally #please ignore if i accidentally left in a 1st person pov mention i think i fixed most of it #if not .. forgive me pls #i shouldnt admit this but ive been messing around on c.ai #but its the worst thing ever idk why people rave about it #writing ur own fanfic >>>>>#its such a waste of time refreshing for a better response #when i know what i want them to say .. its just letting people be lazy #i want to shake everyone using it and tell them to just write their own stuff #its so much more rewarding #anyways i am ovulating and thinking about cod men .. its a terrible curse idk why i let this happen

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delineate-creates · 10 months

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With the recent DDOS attack on AO3, I’ve seen some people sharing epubs of the fics they’ve downloaded. I’m a BIG fan of downloading fics — not just for situations like these, but for the pure fun and convenience of it! I love highlighting and making notes for all my favorite parts, and if the mood strikes me, I’ll even bust out Calibre and transfer them to my kindle with their own little custom covers.

The day before my last big road trip, I decided to do some very quick cover art for a few fics I had in my downloads. I wasn’t originally planning on posting them, but I thought maybe if someone else had saved these fics recently, then they might wanna use them too. These are all tomarry and all fantastic! ☺️

Fics pictured:

Kisses Cursed by @paper-ramblings

What Souls Are Made Of by Emeralds_and_Lilies

Lover’s Spit by @pinktom and @k3uuu (note the content warnings but PLEASE god read this one!!!! 😭)

***If any of you authors actually prefer not to have your fics downloaded, please let me know and I’ll edit this post. Don’t wanna step on any toes! 🖤***

#harry potter #tom riddle #tomarrymort #tomarry #my art #fanart #cover art #fic rec #please ignore the unpolished parts 🥸#um. I also…maybehavemoreartforthesefics #BUT they’re not done #still cooking #so authors I hope you don’t mind me tagging you again if I post more at some point #I just like to give credit to the originals when I post my stuff so I can spread the love 🫶#and if you’ve gotten comments from Karah_needs_a_life then that’s me and I’m SO sorry for going feral

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sneez · 1 year

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more of my oc tervis (any pronouns), the creepiest most miserable little weirdo in town. which is saying something [id under cut]

/ ID: four digital drawings.

The first image is a series of drawings of Tervis on a paper-textured background. A heading at the top reads 'Tervis (Humble)'. One is a coloured headshot of Tervis looking to the left; they have a gaunt face, short receding hair, a scar bisecting their lip and right eyebrow, greyish skin, and are wearing a red shawl around their neck. An arrow pointing at their right eye reads 'one blue eye (mostly blind)'; another arrow pointing at their left eye reads 'one brown eye'. They have a serious, hostile expression. The second drawing is an uncoloured full-body sketch of Tervis. Next to this is the same drawing but coloured and with more polished lineart. Tervis is a thin, hunched figure wearing a long, dark brown robe, a greyish bag on their back, and a red shawl around their head and neck. They are barefoot, and are leaning on a walking staff with both hands. An arrow pointing to the walking staff reads 'needed for walking, useful for hitting'. Tied to the belt around their waist are several long scrolls of paper with writing on them. An arrow pointing to the scrolls reads ''blessings' they paste on infected houses'. Tervis is looking warily out at the viewer from beneath their eyebrows. An arrow pointing to their head reads 'scar from getting hit in the face with a brick (also knocked out a tooth)'. Alongside these drawings are a series of bullet points giving information about Tervis. These read:

indeterminate age, indeterminate gender

religious fanatic (unclear which religion)

lives alone somewhere in the steppe

dislikes everyone but is nicer to children than anyone else

has every disease

The second image is a fake screenshot from the video game Pathologic. Tervis is looking out at the viewer; the background shows scenery from the steppe. The text on screen reads:

CHANGELING: I still don’t see what you could have done that would make you personally responsible for this plague. TERVIS: Responsible… no, not merely responsible! This is my plague, cast upon my head alone. I am the originator; my sin is at the root of all. I have ventured into the town. I have seen the canker there. No matter how many houses I bless, my sickness sinks deeper. The rotted limb is the death of the body… Surely you understand me. You are a healer, are you not? CHANGELING: What is it that you are asking me to do? TERVIS: Let me be the lamb, worker of miracles! My blood shall wet the earth, and bright flowers shall grow… My putrefaction will provide the soil within which new life will burgeon, pure and free of sin and decay. Let it be done. I am ready. My failing flesh is but little sacrifice; in death my weakness will be my strength. Soon these torments will be at an end.

Below are two dialogue options:

You’re insane!

What makes you so sure your death would solve anything?

The third image is a fake screenshot from the video game Pathologic 2. Tervis is looking out at the viewer, and has been painted in semi-realistic style. The text on screen reads:

Tervis: Why do you force me to live? Damn you! Your cure is poison to me. Now I shall never be blessed. You should have left me to bleed.

Below are three dialogue options:

Don’t be absurd. I wasn’t going to watch you die.

What makes you think you deserve suffering?

I wish I had.

At the bottom of the image is a line of dialogue which Tervis has just spoken:

The air is foul. There is rot in this place. The stench of corruption shall be – what was it? What was it? The stench of corruption shall be… swept aside…

The fourth image is a coloured scene depicting Tervis and Clara. They are central in the composition; around them is the steppe, which has been rendered in a loose, painterly style. Tervis is kneeling, their walking staff cast aside, and are reaching out their hands to Clara in a desperate, pleading gesture. They are crying, their face contorted in an expression of agonised ecstasy. Clara stands beside them, one hand reaching out, the other held above Tervis’s head as though about to touch their brow. She has a solemn, pained expression. Behind her head, a break in the dark clouds gives the impression that she is haloed by sunlight; rays of the same light fall onto Tervis, illuminating their face and red robe. End ID. /

#artwork #pathologic #tervis!!!!!!!!!!!! :-D #sorry i know ive already posted that fake p2 screenshot i just wanted to keep all my tervis images in one place. please forgive me #i am having. So Much Fun. i would explode and die for tervis shes the worst i adore her #making fake screenshots is so enjoyable i love trying to match the fonts and copying all the little ui details it's so fun highly recommend #i have a lot of tervis lore which i am still developing but hopefully these drawings give you some idea of his character #hes just a mess really. hes got every imaginable problem #that last drawing is her getting sacrificed in the humble ending. she is SO happy about it #also if you didnt see my last post tervis was originally a warhammer 40k oc (which he still is ive just made a bonus pathologic tervis now)#but ive tried to keep a lot of 40k stuff in her design like the blessing scrolls and the uh. Posture #that's also my reasoning for why nobody knows what his religion is. the watsonian explanation is they are just spouting incomprehensible #disjointed passages from some obscure scripture which nobody can identify (and who would want to try really. tervis is not good company)#but the doylist explanation is that it's literally just the cult mechanicus. just ignore all the references to the weakness of the flesh and #the glory of the machine it will all be fine nothing weird here at all #anyway :-) i could talk about tervis forever but i will stop now #i hope you are all well my dear friends! i am on holiday now wahoo #i am also aware that i have several messages to answer which i will do very soon i am so sorry for being so slow as usual #i love you all i am giving you individual kisses on your individual heads. mwah

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arsenicflame · 5 months

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ive had to step away from all the analysis of the finale because thinking about it for too long it fills me with such a [rage? bitterness? frustration? all of the above?] the likes of which ive genuinely never felt for a show before

ive cared about media before. ive been disappointed by media before, but i think the difference is i haven't put my faith in media like i did ofmd- and the more time passes the more i feel fucking stupid for putting that faith in the show in the first place, when so many of the things coming to light now were already there

i cant think about it too long else it makes me so fucking sad, and im tired of analysing it to bits because its not going to change anything, theres no way to fix any of this, no way to find a spark of light in it, no way to come back, to resurrect the show i fucking loved.

im sure everything everyone is saying is well thought out and nuanced things but for the sake of my own enjoyment of this fucking show i have to just not engage with it anymore.

#the last post was the exception to this and its only bc that segment of the interview was directly on my feed #like im sorry if you followed me for my serious takes and now youre getting silly goofy dude #but not taking this media too seriously is the only way im coping rn #ikyk ive talked your ears off about my relationship with fucking show and the fandom in the past month but. but #nyxtalks #ofmd #ofmd s2 spoilers #ofmd critical #like. the serangela break up Sucks and i could yell about it forever #but in the end i dont think i really went in having faith that marvel wouldnt fuck it up #and thats the difference here for me #the faith i did put in. and the way i see how that i shouldnt have #ill still complain. but i dont have the energy to read them or try and write them in a way thats in any way fact checked or nuanced i just #i need to complain but i need to keep my love for this fucking show i. need to #again. ikyk. so. silly hours. ignoring s2 hours. making up that fictional man hours. i gotta #also please enjoy nyx tries to label an emotion and fails

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