#so I don't have to keep making it myself

[lemonomelette]

Been wanting to redraw this since I first saw it.

#you guys should feed me Tarnma #so I don't have to keep making it myself #I don't want to be known as “top tarnma blogs” ok? #anyway #milne's a freak and I adore him #tarnma #transformers #my art

[sysig]

Blind side (Patreon)

#Doodles #UT #Handplates #Sans #Papyrus #Gaster #Sans closing his good eye every once in a while and keeping his blind eye open - obviously he does so in-game as well so it's a style-match #It's just interesting in the context of him being textually-confirmed blind in Handplates hehe #There's a level of vulnerability there! Not more than closing both eyes around someone - and potentially also distrust! #''I'm baring myself blind right now but /you/ don't need to know that'' - it suits him ♪ #Especially when he does it around Papyrus! Because obviously Papyrus knows about his partial blindness #But when he's trying to be duplicitous - the way he looks at him sidelong with his blind eye when he's trying to lie unsuccessfully ugh <3 #And again-again it being about how much he trusts Papyrus! That he can be a little lazy or spacey and Papyrus will help him! #Also something about his entire right side being impaired - pawing around with his plated hand for something he can't see on that side #The dynamics! Internal and external! Very good like them lots #And then there's Gaster lol ♪ Throw him into the mix I'm sure it won't make a mess at all haha #I guess he's visiting? Just spacing out - he and Sans have a lot on their minds - separately haha #I do love how Sans pushes Gaster to be kind to Papyrus - very deservedly! He wants Papyrus to be happy of course #And he's obviously still angry with Gaster a lot but how might that present itself when Papyrus is Papyrus at Gaster hehe #Even just in that small jokey way of ''you tryin' to step on my turf?'' hehehe #Especially since the comparison wouldn't even come up if he had two functioning eyes hm?? Right Gaster???? Lol #Speaking of that scene and Sans' partial blindness tho ughhughuhg <3 <3 The fact that Sans stands with Gaster to his blind side #It's the vulnerability/distaste/confidence of it all! He's grown up so much it's all right there in how he holds himself #That he either trusts Gaster enough not to attack him - starting to believe him - or that he has enough faith in himself to protect himself #And only looking at him with his peripherals unless he looks directly at him hghhhgh I am Normal about shot composition I swear lol #Also I like how that last panel turned out lol - Sans just appears at the bottom of the steps like how's it going. care to gtfo thx

[uncanny-tranny]

Good news! You aren't required to make your hobbies and passions "marketable." In fact, your crafts, hobbies, and passions don't even need to be public if you so choose. You don't have to spend all of your energy becoming perfect if you aren't enjoying the process. You are not a product, you are a person, a creative, and your work also does not need to be a product.

#positivity #yet another post that's like... thinnly-veiled as being for myself #i find myself freezing with anxiety when i think about the things i used to do (writing especially) because... #...i had felt this force to make it ~content~ and ~marketable to an audience~ and it was so fucking daunting... #...it felt like being a gladiator in a coliseum #even now i fight the urge to equate being marketable to being acceptable and worthy of admiration and praise #i wish i hadn't burnt myself out of writing by doing this because i'm simultaneously grieving my writing and hating it #and it sucks the life out of what makes you feel like a person and it takes the art out of art #so be free! pist your art or don't! you are beholden to nobody!!! #(obviously this is not the case for professional artists who rely on their art to keep them alive) #(and i criticize heavily the idea that audiences are entitled to an artists labour) #(i understand that this isn't universal and if it doesn't apply to you then you don't have to take me seriously) #(if you are a professional artist or what have you i hope you are able to feed and house yourself off of that career!) #(i hope you are able to live a happy life and be able to keep loving what you're doing)

[scificrows]

Okay, my brain refuses to think about anything other than Murderbot, so I looked at every use of the word "friend[s]" in TMBD and... created some pie charts. Normal human activities.

Some Thoughts™ I had while putting this together (under the cut):

In All Systems Red, Murderbot notes that the PresAux crew are all close friends (twice! and goes on to explain their internal relationships which I think is very cute). This is pretty much the only use of 'friends' in ASR, except for when Murderbot says that SecUnits can't be friends with each other.

It seems that this may be one of the first times Murderbot has ever really been around a group of friends before? Murderbot notes that this is not the norm for its contracts and admits that the fact that they are all friends and the way they interact with each other make it actually enjoy that contract (before!!!! the hostile attack, so it already enjoys this contract before they start seeing it as a person etc ghghhhh). [Inference: Friendship seems enjoyable.]

The first character that calls Murderbot its friend is ART in Artificial Condition. Murderbot immediately refutes this (and then goes on to call ART its friend to its clients for the rest of the book). [Inference: Maybe ART is Murderbot's friend. And maybe that is... agreeable]

Rogue Protocol has more than twice as many instances of the word 'friend' as any of the other novellas. Why? Miki. Friendship and its implications for non-humans are a central theme because Miki is friends with everyone. Murderbot initially scoffs at the notion that Miki and Miki's humans are friends. At the end of the book, after witnessing how desperately Don Abene tried to stop Miki from trying to save them, and her grief after its death, Murderbot has to admit that she had in fact been Miki's friend. [Inference: Humans can be friends with bots and can sincerely care about them]

In Exit Strategy, Murderbot tentatively uses the word "friends" for its humans for the first time (several times actually). It questions whether it can actually call them its friends or not and later realizes that it had been afraid what admitting that the humans are its friends would do to it. At the end of the book, Mensah tells Murderbot the PresAux crew are its friends, which is the first time a human has directly said that to it (at least on-page). [Inference: Humans can and want to be Murderbot's friends]

In Network Effect, Murderbot seems to be more habituated to the word 'friend', confidently calling ART and Ratthi its friends, like it is no longer just trying the concept on unsure if it fits. There are many instances in which other characters refer to MB as ART's friend or the other way around and Murderbot's humans refer to Murderbot as their friend several times. Generally, there seems to be less hesitancy, because yes, all of them are Murderbot's friends, why wouldn't they be. [Inference: SecUnits can have friends. This SecUnit has friends. They care about it a lot.]

Conclusion: The Murderbot Diaries tell the story of a construct that does not seem to consider the possibility of friendship for itself and is fine with that - until it accidentally starts caring a little too much and suddenly more and more people annex it as a friend (ew) to the point where it can no longer deny that this is happening and has to begrudgingly admit that yes, it has friends now and maybe that is actually not a bad thing.

#the murderbot diaries #murderbot #𓄿 #hi i'm READY to write a thesis about murderbot i am having way too much fun with this #i created a pretty excel spreadsheet and everything #i don't know why i did this but now i can look at them while i think about this more! so i figured i'd share them haha #i didn't count uses of 'friendly' but special shoutout to when MB is all alone in its cold cubicle missing 20% of its body mass #and starts putting on a show because 'the friendly noise would keep it company' 😭😭 #i feel sick thinking about murderbot all alone on its own not knowing what its like to have friends watching media for 'the friendly noise' #also YES okay i wanted to make a point about miki there but i just #couldn't bring myself to talk about that more so... yeah #also uhhh this data is very subjective #i didn't count particularly ironic uses of 'friend' and generally did not count every instance of friend and sometimes it was a hard call #also i probably shouldn't have counted the times murderbot refered to drones or secsystems as its friends (often after hacking them) #but murderbot does seem to care about them and shows kindness and respect and sometimes points out that a system is friendly #so while i don't think MB means “friend” in the same way referring to them as when it refers to ART for instance #i still think its CUTE and also kinda funny how many times that happened so i decided to keep those!!! #but yeah take my data with a grain of salt lol

[royalarchivist]

Quackity: Oh, it's gonna be so cool to see how this develops. I'm excited, I'm gonna try my best. I'm not the greatest at Minecraft whatsoever, I did nerf Green Team a little bit by accident on the second day. My bad! But, you know, I'm so ready to just grind out and see what we can do, and I just–

I wish everyone saw it with the same amount of, like, kind of enthusiasm. I think all of this and all the development and all the potential arcs, that's going to fcking allow for something absolutely incredible.

And if anyone ends up clipping any of this, something I do want to say is I implore people to view everything with a lot of enthusiasm. No stress, no anxiety, just a lot of enthusiasm. Because, again, this is going to allow for a lot of cool things in the server. Not just now, but in the future, too.

#Quackity #OiBagi #QSMP #QSMP Purgatory #Purgatory #Green Team #Bagi #Alright last one for tonight I got things to do #But Quackity did say ''if anyone clips any of this'' so I wanted to make sure I shared that final message he gave everyone #Because I agree! #I know fandoms can be toxic and people can have POV brainrot #But I hope everyone is still able to remember the reasons why they love QSMP so much #and I hope they're still able to find enjoyment -- if not with the event itself then with your streamers #I personally wasn't a fan of the Debate part of the Election Arc #But I still enjoyed myself because the people I watched made it funny or they poked fun at it or they avoided it completely #Don't be afraid to block people or mute / block tags or anything #And for the love of god stop using Twitter if you can #I've significantly reduced my usage (even though I love seeing fanart -- though many fanartists are moving to Tumblr; which is nice) #I primarily use it to keep up with the update accounts and see what the CCs are up to #But anyways. Take care of yourselves guys. The toxic people can be loud but they are just a very vocal (very annoying) minority #Love and enthusiasm is always the majority. After all; that's why we're here in the first place!

[scentedcandlecryptid]

Impulse and Kid Flash racing in my comic/show crossover!

@givemewallywestorgivemedeath I think you mentioned these two racing in my main post, so this one's for you XDD

#I think that Impulse is canonically a lot faster than Kid Flash... but tbh #I felt bad for KF so they tied cause Impulse got distracted from this whole new universe. #or something idk XD #young justice cartoon meets young justice 1998 #young justice cartoon #young just us #young justice 1998 #kid flash #wally west #impulse #bart allen #drew this as a little treat for myself #I love bart so much #i missed him #I really need to read more of the comic and watch more of the show #but shhh it's fine #tbh I don't have any plot for this crossover #but I want it so bad #so I'll keep making art for it until I figure something out.

[wikiangela]

fuck it friday 🎄

tagged by @thewolvesof1998 💖

wasn't sure about posting this bc I don't wanna share like everything I have so far but it's fuck it friday so fuck it lol I'm too excited to keep it to myself haha - here's more of the christmas fic and the main idea behind it (I said it's gonna be mostly silly and fluffy and I promise it will be, just gotta add a little more sad while buck talks about his childhood lol)

prev snippet

___

His eyes don’t leave the screen, while Eddie’s are glued to Buck’s face. “Well, there’s a lot of things I always wanted to do with my family on Christmas, but never got to.” his voice gets even quieter. “But there’s one thing in particular. I, uh, that’s so stupid.” he chuckles quietly, then nods to the screen, where a kid is opening a gift with a bright smile, his family surrounding him. “I wanted this.” he admits quietly, as if embarrassed. He never told Eddie much about his life growing up, but based on everything Eddie knows about his parents, he can imagine it wasn’t great. He never asked, not wanting to pry, but now Eddie wonders what Buck’s Christmas must’ve looked like, especially after Maddie moved out. He must’ve been miserable, and Eddie’s heart is breaking just at the thought.

“It’s not stupid to want a happy holiday with a loving family.” he says softly, carefully. Buck shakes his head, the red in his cheeks now visible despite the dark.

“I mean, that too, I- I never got this, and I always wished- but not just that.” another shake of his head. “I mean, the sweaters.” he mutters under his breath.

“Christmas sweaters?” Eddie asks, not sure if he heard right, just because of how quiet Buck said it.

“I know, it’s dumb. I just always imagined sitting around in matching sweaters, as a family, taking pictures, looking like we belong together, like I- like I belong.” he adds, turning his head away, so Eddie can’t see his face. Eddie reaches his hand further, touching Buck’s shoulder.

“They couldn’t give you matching Christmas sweaters?” he asks incredulously, fighting not to raise his voice.

___

no pressure tags: @elvensorceress @gaydiaz @diazass @thebravebitch @silentxxsoul @shortsighted-owl @eddiebabygirldiaz @arthursdent @diazblunt @911onabc @spagheddiediaz @housewifebuck @gayhoediaz @rogerzsteven @watchyourbuck @monsterrae1 @honestlydarkprincess @underwater-ninja-13 @eowon @weewootruck @loserdiaz @evanbegins @steadfastsaturnsrings @ladydorian05 @malewifediaz @pirrusstuff @theotherbuckley @911-on-abc @hoodie-buck @wildlife4life @fortheloveofbuddie @nmcggg @diazpatcher @jeeyuns @jesuisici33 @lover-of-mine @jamespearce9-1-1 @giddyupbuck @spotsandsocks @daffi-990 @exhuastedpigeon @disasterbuckdiaz @buckaroosheart @hippolotamus @king-buckley

#fuck it friday #fic snippet #buddie #buddie fic #buddie wip #wikiangela writes #my writing #my wips #buddie christmas fic #or more like buddie christmas sweaters fic but anyway lol #don't ask what christmas movie they're watching it's all made up lmao #me: i'll keep it vague for now to figure out how to phrase it the way i want to and how to make it make sense #also me: here's every single thing I've written for this bc im too excited and have no self control lol #(still not sure it makes sense but im having fun haha) #getting so excited about my fics i can't keep them to myself is so on brand lmao (jess saw this snippet as soon as i finished it <3 haha) #i might mix it up and share some cheating fic on sunday tho haha

[scintillyyy]

thinking about it again (steph's anger holding a lot shame & disgust for her parents/their life choices/her upbringing and her negative biases as a result and her desire to completely divorce herself from her roots & be, what she thinks is, better than that)

#like don't get me wrong there are things steph deserves to be angry about #but i find myself far more interested in how ashamed she is of her parents at the same time #(thinking of how she hated it when her mom would come to gymnastics meets) #and because they failed her #idk. i don't see a lot of anger at society from her her anger is far more personal #she blames her mom for being an addict and is so angry about it #she doesn't necessarily acknowledge the societal factors affecting her mom that would lead to her addiction #like i don't think she has to be super sympathetic to her mom who failed her #and her unkindness about her mother's addiction makes sense to me as she was personally failed #but i think her inability to seperate her anger from this disgust at her parents' choices #leads her to have a lot of negative biases about people who remind her of her parents #and an inability to be impartial because of it #anyways thinking of this because she did grow up in the suburbs #and so much of that culture is keeping up with the jones and people often hide their struggles #so this would have been exacerbated by the thoughts that 'none of these other kids have these issues. their parents are good unlike mine' #because it looks that way to outsiders (even if it's not that way behind closed doors)

[lunarharp]

figured i'd do this again..bit early i guess..

#to cheer me up.. i feel bad atm.. these things don't even make me feel very good tho bc i'm such a narrative/sketch-based artist.. #but Proper Beautiful Finished Pieces are what grab attention and look good at the end of the year all neatly lined up lol..... #so looking at a “yearly review” where i can only choose 'the best image of the month' (??) is like...What have i even been doing... #i did a month by month look back on twt for myself instead..but even that doesn't express the quantity of comic-based stuff.. #that i do put a lot of time/heart into..but alas i feel bad bringing even them back..RTing/reblogging my own art simply feels bad lol.. #AND WHY IS IT ALL B&W...trying to accept that i LIKE doing that and sketching and scribbling..not like i'm trying to like..Get Artist Job.. #this year was so profoundly lonely at times bc i spent all my time drawing instead of socialising and trying to find friends.... #please please please have achieved more of your dreams in the future so you can look back at 2023 and think.. #It was good that happened so that it got me further to the future. Or whatever i guess..................... #regardless i did have a great amount of fun drawing and improving this year and dwelling deeply & heavily on witch hat atelier. #art-wise and emotionally....march july & september were the best months i think..AUGUST WAS SO WEIRD SUMMER IS SO EVIL ALWAYS. #thank you very much if you are reading this for enjoying & leaving nice tags & such like <3 i've realised how fulfilling that is to receive #really keeps me posting stuff here instead of keeping it all to myself in my head #i wish everyone in this world could have a safe and happy end of year. i wish living in this world were easier

[uhbasicallyjustmilex]

and if you’re thinking of me, i’m probably thinking of you

#i may or may not have destroyed my own heart in the process of making this gifset actually #i keep thinking about how the amount they’ve played and created together over the years must echo down to into the things they create now #how they must hear each other between the notes #not in everything they play #but in ways that will just catch them off guard sometimes #or in ways they don't even notice because that connection is so much a part of them it's deeply ingrained beyond consciousness #anyway #now that i’ve suitably broken my own heart i’ll see myself out #milex #miles kane #alex turner #my gifs #lulu posts

[lover-of-mine]

I know it isn't fair...

#911 #buddie #911edit #buddieedit #911 on fox #911 fox #911 abc #evanbuckleyedit #eddiediazedit #my edit #otp: you don't need to pretend with me #usercam #flashing tw #sometimes i have an idea #but since im making the gifs one by one i don't get the full effect of what I'm doing until I'm here #and they are in order and ready to post #and im like damn #anyway #i made this as photo edits #but ive been playing with animating the text too #and i thought this idea would be perfect for me to try it out #i will be hearing from my own lawyer because i wanna sue myself lol #what the fuck is going on my brain lol #but you get it right? its a promise they couldn't keep #and the scenes mirror each other #yeah im gonna go now this gonna go nowhere anyway so who cares #911verse #evan buckley #eddie diaz

[goobygnarp]

.

#good grief im gettin a lil tired of seeing 'DONT DO THIS' kinda art videos #i very much understand its a youtube thing and that clickbait names and thumbs get the views and attention needed #but it doesnt mean it doesnt annoy me or that I cant be annoyed by it #sometimes i just see it in tutorial pictures too #but the large DONTS with red Xs near the supposed ''wrong'' way of drawing is so demotivating #people start and draw in many ways than one #its what makes art their own #but when videos or tutorial posts are made and show the ''WRONG'' way to go about it #its like scolding the new artist or long time artist with that style that they're doing it wrong and that its bad #no matter the intention its not the way to go about helping artists learn to draw #and in my personal opinion #the click bait ''DONT DO THIS WHEN DRAWING'' thing is what keeps me from actually watching the vids #i get theyre probably helpful but i don't like that I have to feel some NEED or DESIRE to click on a vid cause I feel like I did a thing #wrong or that i never should have done it at all #i wish i could see more 'here are some tips that helped me #kinda vids cause yes i would love to learn what helped you rather than being or feeling wronged for drawing in a way that isn't theirs #im rambling but i have been seeing a lot of 'DONT DO THIS' NEVER DO THIS' 'IF YOURE DOING THIS STOP NOW' kinda art vids #im speakin for myself here #but im an artist sifting through art youtube or spaces always willing to learn new ways of improving my art #i dont need to feel click baited like the next 3am don't this kid to learn how to improve my inking skills #if it was more a 'this is my personal preference and I wanna share it with my audience and maybe teach some things' kinda vid #id watch that too #but im just so tired of seeing art youtube going down this need to tell folks 'YOURE DOING IT ALL WRONG. THIS IS THE RIGHT WAY"

[alsojnpie]

dishes are forever

#I MISSED HAVING A TABLET!!!! #ht papyrus #a gentle touch when you're sad #a menacing touch when it would be funny #he can do it all #LITTLE PRO TIP LIFE HACK THOUGH: IF WASHING DISHES MAKES YOU WANT TO LIVE ON A DIFFERENT PLANET #MAYBE YOU HAVE TOO MANY DANG DISHES #BEING IN A SITUATION WHERE I HAVE 80% FEWER DISHES THAN BEFORE MEANS I DO DISHES MORE OFTEN BUT IT'S SO EASY #AND NOT SOUL SUCKING AT ALL #JUST MY EXPERIENCE!!!!!! THAT'S ALL #I'm sure when i am reunited with my other dishes i will languish in bed staring at this psyching myself up to the task #but i like keeping random jars from food i bought and dishes that i picked up in different places. #they physically remind me of everywhere I've been and sometimes i just look at them and remember where I've been #my favorite is the old ratatouille jar i bought at carrefour in Chengdu #that jarred ratatouille was the nastiest food to grace this earth #i bought it in case it would make a quick easy meal (you don't really find those at the grocery store in China at least not back then) #but even my cheap lazy self couldn't eat it #so no one ever consumed that ratatouille but the jar was pretty big so i put other stuff in it and now it's my dish #and somehow the label is glued on PERMANENTLY it has never washed off after all these years #actually idk maybe it eventually did it isn't here for me to look at but it lasted a long time i know that

[accirax]

On my fetch quest to retrieve Xander's assigned color from the DRDT Demo Video, I noticed something interesting-- where everybody stands in the Class Trial totally changed between the demo video and now???

Here's where everybody stood in the Class Trial during the demo:

(ignore the colors, they have no meaning) And here's where everybody canonically stands:

Like I said, almost completely different. Here are a couple of my observations that I thought were most interesting:

Teruko and Eden are the only characters who stayed in the same location. Teruko always stood in front of MonoTV, and Eden was always to her right.

Arei and Hu always stood next to each other.

Veronika and Levi always stood next to each other, although they flipped which order they were standing in.

Originally, Xander was in the position opposite the circle from Teruko. Now, that's where David stands.

I have no idea what any of this might mean, and it might be completely arbitrary. Still, it's interesting what might have been going through the creator's head when they originally chose the demo placements, and then when those placements changed.

#danganronpa despair time #drdt #drdt spoilers #<- for the sprites used in the second picture. i keep doing this to myself #fanganronpa #another observation is-- poor rose!! she got bracketed by maniacs in the real version #arturo and david on one side and ace and nico on the other is not where you want to be #also REJOICE!!! i finally have the ability to add image ids and text colors on my computer! #i don't have to go on to my fucking ipad to type in all the image ids anymore! it's so much faster! #i do wish i had the ability to add color when i was making my color theory but eh... since you only get like 8 options it's meh #idk what else to tag this as i don't really want to clog the character tags #my theories

[secondbeatsongs]

Do you have a YouTube? I feel I bit bad spam rebloging all the banners I’ve missed so I can find them later—

well,

never feel bad for spam reblogging things! I love it when people reblog stuff from me! that is the point of tumblr! reblogs are what keeps this horrifying hellsite ticking

but also

2. I do have a youtube channel! I almost never update it, but it is here

#asks #the-cactus-taco #I keep saying to myself that I'll add more of the songs to youtube #but then I just. don't #in my defense. I have edited so many songs #it's a huge undertaking #esp because I want to make weird WordArt or something for each of them if I do #idk. it's a someday project #like many other things

[goldkirk]

I'm so proud of myself about finances in the past couple months. I still struggle with money but I did enough meditation and journaling and practicing about it to make myself able to actually face my loans and credit cards and savings and bills and start really truly organizing and addressing them for the first time in years instead of just flying by the seat of my pants.

Like. This is a huge deal for me. I've felt like I'm in deadly danger every time I've tried to think about money for years and years. I'm finally able to look it in the face and stare it down and start to organize and plan on purpose instead of just keeping up with the minimum to stay afloat. I'm so proud of myself.

It's still a refrain of "GUILT (funny link)" every time I think about money but I'm able to actually make spreadsheets and face the numbers and monthly tracking again, and even make a new full budget which I haven't been able to do in ages.

still feel guilt, overwhelm, and helplessness, but no longer feel as much deep elemental shame and terror. that's progress baby

#we don't need to talk about how many months and months of therapy visits and doctor appointments I put on credit cards #among other things #but I had to put my foot down about it a couple months ago and shout at myself a little saying HEY #I AM SHAKING YOU BY THE SHOULDERS I AM SHOUTING FOR YOU TO HEAR #OF COURSE IT WAS A TERRIBLE FINANCIAL DECISION BUT YOU WEREN'T EVEN EXPECTING TO BE ALIVE #THE CREDIT CARD DEBT WAS NECESSARY TO KEEP YOU ALIVE AND IT DID AND EVERYTHING ELSE IS WAY LESS IMPORTANT THAN THAT #why the FUCK are you feeling SO ASHAMED for making the best decision you knew how to make at the time??? #just because you know NOW that you could have tried some other options doesn't mean you did THEN #you may have known enough to feel shame and guilt yes but you would never in a million years have gotten the help you needed fast enough #by attempting to go another route #you didn't trust anyone besides a very few handfuls of people and even them it wasn't fully #and the stress of running it through parental insurance was so terrifying to you bc you didn't know what that would do #and you never had cosigners for anything your whole adult life. it's OKAY #you fucking DID YOUR BEST #YOU HAVE LEARNED. YOU HAVE MADE CHANGES. YOU HAVE ALREADY DONE BETTER #YOU WILL CONTINUE TO LEARN AND IMPROVE OVER TIME #it is not the end of the world. even the utilities sending you to debt collections etc etc #YOU ARE FIGURING IT OUT ONE PIECE AT A TIME #MORE PEOPLE ARE ASHAMED AND AFRAID OF THEIR OWN FINANCES THAN YOU THINK #if the people who fought and argued with and shamed you for considering student loans much less taking them out #had wanted you to actually be financially safer and healthier #they could have just fucking helped out or cosigned your loans or actively helped you find other solutions #instead of spending months and months telling you it was the worst decision ever and would ruin you financially for decades and such #you made the best decisions you could with the level of terror and knowledge that you had. it was enough to keep you alive. #isn't that enough? #isn't it a victory to survive?? isn't that enough?????? #god i'm cringing at sharing this but if it's been this hard for me surely at LEAST one of you has also made financial mistakes or regrets #and seeing me be honest that I fucked it all up too and it's a mess and I'm just climbing back through it as best as I can as I go #will hopefully make at least one of you feel a tiny bit less alone