#so I can start laughing like crazy.

[gagad]

I suddenly remembered when Kino thought Yuri was dead but he was alive and ran to him

#Hey #I know I'm being silly #but I remember that every day #especially when I get angry #so I can start laughing like crazy. #THIS SHIT IS THE BEST THING IN DIABOLIK LOVERS TO NE I CAN DIE HAPPY #diahell #diabolik lovers #DIABOLIK LOVERS YURI #Diabolik lovers kino #those bitchs keep me alive #i think the reason why I'm still alive is kino/ yuri #nothing else

[crowsgrudge]

fionna's world being represented by a dandelion makes so much sense ... they're weeds. yet people make wishes through them, changing their whole meaning from something meant to be destroyed to something hopeful.

dandelions are also resilient and it makes sense that something associated with them would. you know. perservere despite the destruction caused by the scarab.

but ultimately i think what REALLY made me tear up over this is that dandelions are really boring plants. when you're a kid you blow on them and make your wish but they're not eyecatching or anything but still, fionna's final wish was for her old world to still exist as it was when she left it (> plain and simple. boring even).

like the moment she realized she would lose her friends, and that her friends might forget each other if the world got its magic back, she immediately decided she didn't want it and I think that ties back to the dandelion metaphor so well... like, do you really need magic to be real to find it everywhere? or can you turn something boring into something magical?

#remi rambles #fionna and cake #f&c spoilers #sorry i have many Not Silly thoughts about the finale #i looove fionna she was such a wonderful character .. so well written and real TO ME #shes my best friend shes my everything shes silly she makes me so emotional #like even when simon told her he was gonna wear the crown to get the magic back to her world #< the moment she realized he would go crazy she started to think about it #like she wont sacrifice a friend just to get what she really wants #i really loved her journey through the show idk #going from being so over her routine > finding out magic can be dark too > making her own magical world just by loving her friends #like its so much more than 'the power of friendship will save us!!' #yes she saved the world thanks to the love she had for her friends but it was backed up by a full journey beforehand #i think. the line about having functional toilets (while still being a p good joke) makes the point so much clearer #we have been to the end of the universe and back but we have functioning toilets !!! #like do u get it. do i sound crazy #< crazy person voice #anyway yes im done sorry #live laugh love fionna and cake

[mattodore]

Seven Sins Challenge: Which of your OCs fits pride, greed, wrath, envy, lust, gluttony and sloth. Then pass it on...

feel like i’m shamecubing matthias here but 🤷

#river dipping #asks #agena87 #matthias evanoff #theodore doe #dionte duval #echthroi #lykos #ts4 #oc extras #thank you for sending this to me btw <3 made me laugh just bc like. i knew matthias would be forced to look in the mirror for once #…too bad it just made him smile 🙄 #theo’s a little greedy too but it’s not like. enough to really classify him with it #also!!! mattodore didn't fit sloth at all… esp. not theo. so 🫵 forcing everyone to see one of my other ocs for once #dionte sleeps a lot… #even before he was turned into a werewolf and started getting prophetic visions he was still there falling asleep on subways #and he was NAWT meant for working. he was meant for batting his pretty little lashes and having things handed to him on a silver platter #AHHHHH!!!!!!!! this puts me down to only four more asks left in my inbox 😋😋😋😋😋 #this is so crazy icb how clean it’s looking in there…. #two of these are just the same tag game and idk if i need to answer them anymore bc i answered that message from morri that was similar #hm… #um and then the last two are oc questions abt mattodore 😁 one is spoiler territory tho so i don’t think i can answer it </3

[novelconcepts]

It’s always so funny to me when someone can’t tell the difference between an actor who’s over the top and an actor who is doing an intentionally over the top performance. The former can be super aggravating, I get it—but the latter can be so goddamn effective. Especially when you know the actor already, know they’re fully capable of giving normal human facial expressions and chill line deliveries. And they’re out here doing The Absolute Most all of a sudden? It’s for a reason, dude. It’s almost always for a reason. And once you can see past the camp on the surface, it’s so much fun digging in to what emotions the character is actually hiding.

#this is mainly about servant (and to a lesser degree YJ) #like Ambrose in servant is (pardon me) serving SUCH a chaotic performance #but having known her for decades I know full well that’s on purpose #Dorothy is over the top because she HAS to be. because she’s built walls so high around her own grief that the denial comes out in Crazy #and she fully thinks she’s the only one paying attention. the only sane one in the room. #you get glimpses of her being ‘normal’ in flashbacks #still a little Much. still a product of wealth and expectation. detached from reality to a degree. #but the character she becomes after the tragedy is. A Character. #it’s not the woman she was before. she bricked that woman up. she’s taken her performance from television and made a baby blanket out of it #it’s so. so intentional. #and you sort of get a similar thing going with Hewson in early eps of YJ #totally different starting block. Van doesn’t start out traumatized. but she does start out Big #she’s loud she’s silly she’s being intentionally wacky to get laughs out of people #and some of it comes off a little cringe. because it’s a kid playing a role #this is how you like me. I’m gay. I’m butch. I’m hiding. #if I’m a jester you’ll see what I want you to and nothing more. that’s the plan. it’s working. don’t look at the goalie. #not as a person. #but as the show goes on (or as she’s spending time with taissa) she slows down some. quiets. she’s snarkier. holding tension differently. #Hewson starts the performance at an 11 so they can really delve into who Van becomes when the mask is off #when there’s no point in playing the class clown #when it’s like. ah yeah. here’s the kid who grew up too fast. #here’s the kid who’s scared to death. and angry. and willing to fight to live. #it’s not an overacting thing. it’s VAN overacting to keep her secrets #watch the face so you miss what the hands are doing #actors man. actors are fucking cool. storytelling is fucking cool. #deconstructing the illusion is my favorite thing #(anyway still watching servant and it’s still really. Something Else.)

[stuck-in-the-ghost-zone]

preemptively sorry for how fucking long this is it is YOUR FAULTT THOUGH!!!! large bowl of seeds for u. it is almost 2am sorry.

SO. there are. two ways to assign the prime defenders powers etc. the first way is just, like, categorize their existing powersets within the prt framework, & the second is to give them entirely new abilities based on the way worm works. delightfully, all the powers they Do have work really well for the most part, so even that doesn't require a ton of shuffling.

categorizing their pre-existing powers:

wiwi-- breaker w/ a shaker subclass. neither of them rated very high, but that's already a rare and versatile enough combination!!

dakota-- brute babeeeey!!! brute/mover its so straightforward. hell yeah babey. i don't know what he'll end up looking like post-heart removal & stuff but my guess is that'll end up looking more like a mover/striker.

vyncent-- now THIS one gave me trouble. i... hm. to say this without talking about stuff that i don't think has come up much already, (hey!! you're at that clockblocker pov! directly related to what flechette says!) i'd call him a grab-bag cape, irt the greats at least. post-greats-- again, i don't know what his powerset will look like after this arc! but if he's going all in w/ the fire magic, that would for sure be some striker shit! :]]]

giving them new powers... man i'm reining myself in so hard from five more paragraphs on Why exactly i'm saying all this.

wiwi still breaker for sure, maybe breaker-master, maybe master-stranger. yknow. powers are fluid, the prt categories are pretty rigid. i... don't know. enough about his situation yet to be clearer than that vague idea yet-- i really like the idea of him just. ditching his body & using a noncorporeal form but he still has to keep an eye on his body i think that's great. the noncorporeal form would b able to change its visibility but still b limited by proximity to the body. & fluctuating energy shit powered by fluctuating amounts of recent-death in the area, maybe probably also limited in that it's only accessible in his breaker form.... also i think u will appreciate this style note from the [UNNAMED PARAHUMANS TTRPG] i'm referencing a lot here.

dakota--in this situation he probably would not. have that mechanical heart and shit. he' would still be a mover/thinker-- thinker rating is for faster mental processing + senses imminent pain for the people in his immediate vicinity. not danger, just pain; it immediately registers ambiently & can be generally traced back to whoever it is. no he can't turn it off ever, it manifests as feeling a similar level of pain, yes it works on himself. + mover-- he can fucking fly. no super strength, just very fast flight & the general "won't splat himself flying into something" capabilities, which meshes well w/ the faster processing & reflexes. i'm split on how exactly this would work mechanically but i will NOT go into that now. i am also not going into the 15k discussion in my brain on why dakota 'notoriously bad at thinking about things' cole would be a thinker but u gotta trust the process ok??

vyncent-- trump!!!! somehow this is the only straightforward one to me? he can copy powers at the full strength or ability level of the original for an unspecified amount of time that's usually 1-30 minutes by touching the cape. crucially, he doesn't have any edge on how to use these powers + can easily misuse or become extremely overwhelmed by them. he's easily the most powerful out of the three of them <33

ashe-- ashe is NOT HERE currently and also it's 1:30 am so i gotta go fucking sleep soon BUT they would be a master. easy. :o) they can make some lil guys n do stuff with them!!!!

in general these are pretty fucking cracked abilities, all of them would b oosely above a seven or so in a number rating once they're really settled in their powers-- this is mostly because i'm assuming that they would still be heirs-apparent to the prime force equivalent, which would b the triumvirate :]] anyway. good lord. this is like the cliff notes edition of what i've been thinking and scribbling in the notes app for the past several hours. sorry if it's fucking incomprehensible. gn!!! <333

AAAAAH FUCK YESSSSSS OKAY OKAY OKAY my response is probably going to be equally as long. so it's fine. oooouh buddy.

I KNOW WHAT BREAKER MEANS NOW !!! I dontttt think ive learned shaker yet. breaker is like.... breaking the laws of physics/shifting planes or whatever. PERFECT for william hell yes. for putting them actually in worm world ... ughhhh breaker/master william is REALLY cool. I havwnt learned stranger yet but i think he would develop a complex over being classified as stranger <3 (like how weld doesn't like that he's classified as a brute even though that's not exactly what it means, he just doesn't like the word) . GODDDD just thinking abt putting pd boys in worm is fucking me up haven't they been through enough. I want to see them all in a fit of despair. william ditching his body is SO good I miss when he would do that, also the powers being limited by how far away he is AND THE AMOUNT OF RECENT DEATH IN THE AREA. holy shit. that's so fucking good . im sure he would not overthink at all the fact that he is stronger when more people around him have died . I'm sure he'd do awesome in the leviathan fight for sure for sure .

DAKOTA BRUTE <3 DAKOTA BRUTE/MOVER I LOVE THIS A LOTTTTTT hellbyes. awesome. it's so perfect for him <3 worm world I'm SURPRISED u didn't stick with brute for him. eyes emoji. I trust your judgement but now i am Thinking... Hmm..... YOU BRING INTO QUESTION something I have been thinking about. and I'm going to probably get derailed a little here but stay with me. how the way powers manifest directly relate to the trigger event. because for a WHILE before we learned taylors I was like "OH i bet the powers are going to be directly related to what traumatic thing happened to them" and then we learn about taylor and grue and a couple more and I kind of lost that theory because while you can. technically draw relations between their powers and their events it seemed like too much of a stretch to do . HOWEVER now my thinking has changed AGAIN and I think the powers ARE related to specific trigger events but it's not as straightforward as "oh something scary happened to you with bugs so now you have bug powers" I think it's gonna be more complicated than that. WHICH. THE WAY THIS RELATES. BACK ON TOPIC NOW. to DAKOTA . assuming his trigger event is still he and katori falling off the building I think it's AWESOME that his powers would manifest as FLIGHT for one. and the fucking. pain sense thing. fuck me up. dakota extreme hero complex cole would be so fucked up by a power where he ambiently senses pain from the people around him at all times and cannot turn it off. I'm sure he would feel so normal about being around william chronic pain wisp 24/7. also I can SO CLEARLY imagine how this power specifically would lead to him getting super overwhelmed in chaotic situations like he does in canon. and just fucking. bolt out of there because it's too much. again. he'd have such a wonderful time in the leviathan fight

I AM AT CLOCKBLOCKER POV !!!! actually technically I'm on kid win pov now but I haven't finished his chapter yet. vyncent grab bag cape..... yeah... I think it would be EXTREMELY funny imagining the PRT in pd world trying 2 classify vyncent like. what the fuck does this kid do . what do we do with him. hes got other guys in his head that give him powers. is he a master??? no he can't fucking control them. is he a striker??? only SOMETIMES. is he a blaster?? AGAIN ONLY SOMETIMES. cannot classify him bitch!!!!!!!! giving him worm powers though.. UGH. being able to touch someone and COMPLETELY copy their powers but only for a short period of time???? I fucking love that a lot. he WOULD be the most powerful out of them!!! I can hear taylors inner analysis dialogue about him now and it's very similar to the clockblocker "DONT LET HIM.TOUCH YOU" panic. loooove imagining this playing off of the rest of pd,,, i know there was AT LEAST one time where he had william sort of transfer some of his ghost powers for a minute? I think it was during the lich fight in the theatre but i just remember vycnent floating and going intangible and NOT KNOWING how to control it or anything. loveeee that. in world dynamics I feel like vyncent would be a late addition to their team (instead of coming from another world maybe he just. had his trigger event happen way later than the other two..or something.) and not trusting them as much at first/being REALLY shaky using either of their powers but after a while being really comfortable in a fight with using either Williams or dakotas powers in a fight. Just like. imagining the fluidity of how they'd work together in a tense situation assuming they're not being complete dumbasses <3333 UGH it's really good

AAAASHE ASHE ASHE IM SOOO SO GLAD YOU INCLUDED ASHE IN THIS I miss him.so much every day. from what I know so far master involves having/making/controlling some sort of minion (cannot think of a better word than that rn) AND I THINK THATS REALLYYYY perfect for ashe. i assume he would actually work pretty closely to canon in that his limitation would be the book? or if he doesn't have the book maybe his limitation would be a) having only a few different types of things he could summon (the big hand, the water fairy, duck etc) and/or b) only being able to control them.for a short amount of time after they're summoned so he has to be quick about dismissing them. can't keep the demon hand around for too long or it might start picking things up and throwing them at random. putting teammates in danger bc he can't control it anymore etc etc. alsooooooo in clockblocker pov they VERY briefly mentioned the possibility of having secondary trigger events (?!!!!?!?!) and you know I locked onto that SO FUCKING HARD. ashe being born with powers and then his secondary trigger event being his mom's death <3 im.NOT even going to attempt to talk about how the trickster would work in worm world/if it would even exist in this setting bc i don't know enough about the types of powers and things yet..but just know. I am keeping this in the back of my mind "this is a fun surprise tool that will help us later" style

#also side note but can i say. thw whole time i was reading the leviathan fight a persistent thought in the back of my mind was #“man i really wish they had a cape here who could control water- THEY NEED TIDE... THEY NEED TIDE SO BAD” #so like..really normal about putting prime defenders SPECIFICALLY in the leviathan fight. teehee (<< most diabolical laugh youve ever heard #I HAVE A LOT MORE THOUGHTS ABOUT WILLIAM TOO BUT..HMMMMMMMMM DONT THINK I CAN SAY SOME OD THEM YET #EXTREMELY interested 2 see whether ur thoughts on specifically him and dakota #will change after both the training arc and certain other events <3 #hehehehehehehee #GOD I CANNOT STOP IMAGINING. PD IN WORM.WORLD. they would suffer so fucking badly man. #william wisp guilt complex about his powers turned up to 200 #HAVING A LOT OF THOUGHTS ABOUT ASHE ALSOOOOO . AS ALWAYS #now that i know more abt power classes i am VERY confidently going to put mark down as a tinker/striker. #with the tinker rating being SLIGHTLY higher than striker bc he uses the things he makes to amplify his naturally weaker striker powers. #tiiiiiide im thinkingggg would be. whats the elemental one. #not breaker bc thats specifically about breaking physics and i dont think that works for him. #is it shaker?????? i dknt think ive learned shaker yet. #U ARE MORE EQUIPPED AT THIS THAN ME whats tide. tide would also for sure be a case 53 right. i havent exactly learned what that means yet #but im assuming its the whole artifically giving people powers thing and. thats tide baby. idk if clones would work in worm world #so maybe its him and his regular siblings all being specifically given elemental powers #so they could work together as some super crazy powerful team. and then. that Doesnt happen <3 #(idk if u have listened to the tide oneshot yet but. its good. if you ignore dodgeboy) #ANYWAY. i should start getting ready for work now. im having so many thoughts about this norlw #hollyyyyyy shit #infected my brain with worms (pun intended) #asks #friends!!! #intertexts #wormposting #jrwi pd #<< only tagging so i can find this later when i learn more and can properly yell about it #new haven wards

[boxwinebaddie]

an uncle nina check in <3

hi team! thanks for sticking around! i know my blog isn't always the most exciting and enriching place in the world in terms of content, but i am very /content/ to have you all here. <3333

i promise, oddly enough, i have A TON of inspiration and ideas for all my weird styles ( if you're curious about anything please lmk! i've been trying to flesh out my aus out lately ), i've just been in a major bummer depression era lately, so it's hard for me to get my asks done and i'm having a hard time committing to finishing my writing. :<

i think it's because of stress and my bipolar, but i am trying to get back on the horse! ( are we all laughing at the idea of me trying to get on a horse? i'd start crying help city girl fail moment for me ) yeehaw!

and while, unfortunately due to the instability ( fabulous legendary iconery ) of my pretty girl popstar personality, i do not know whether i will be answering almost no questions or one million, regardless of that, i just wanted to let you know, i'm still here, still kicking my feet, twirling my hair, cooking...i'm just really trying not to force myself to put out anything i don't like...and only do what makes me truly happy.

however, nothing, my dear sweet e-darlings...

makes me happier than coming home to all of you. <333

so thank you for flooding even the darkest corners of my life with bright light, supporting my phantom fics and being wonderful,

uncle nina xx

#nina speaks #hi my loves #idk what the point of this was #i just know my blog is really inconsistent and i know i dont really post anything or anything that useful #but i wanted you to know that i love you very much and i still care a lot about all of you and all my content actually #which i have been fleshing out in notebooks and google docs i've been doing lots of world building and character study #so feel free to ask me something challenging about any part of my nina sp auniverse that interests u itll make my brain work #i've also been taking very silly but dilligent notes abt what ravesey style looks like for ter so if u want to laff at those u can #i just love taking notes on detail and understanding exactly what characters look like or what settings appear like idk #might be some experimental writing on here i like doing different mediums like i was being silly #and started writing a netflix trailer for rm haha i also have been doing weird personality tests and questionnaires #i've been trying to think very deeply about tkak and my tfbw styles if u have any questions there and am deep plotting rm #trying to be impactful while also keeping things fun and learning to enjoy myself again i suppose #so again thakn u for being here sorry its weird on here but thank u for supporting me as i learn and grow my sunshines #also ik i have a ton of asks and uve already asked me so many things so never feel inclined to message me #but i love hearing what ur curious about hopefully i can answer some stuff eventually but again im on a break #i'm here but i'm not this is a safe place we try and fail we have fun and promote style world domination thru my weird styles #ilysm i'm shutting up now i promise i'm still here i'm just trying to be healthy and happy esp rn when i am not emotionally well #gotta protect my peace and my vibe palace but im still here! #MWAH MWAH MWAAAAAH #really trying to heal my inner child or like the girl in me that liked to write silly stories and create crazy things #weird hcs big dramatic plots silly stuff...i want to honor that girl because she was happy and free and had fun #and i want to do that again so lets have fun guys #no judgement no seriousness just good vibes and good reads #welcome to the uncle nina learns to laugh again arc #i hope you enjoy it

[felizusnavidad]

if there's one thing that is absolutely pissing me off it's my irl friend who wanted to see my instagram account

#i didn't really want to show it to him but i may have mentioned that i started this account #because he keeps talking about tiktok all the time #and he said he wanted to see it so i was like yeah ok why not it would be nice to know i have his support #and ever since he followed me he never liked any of my posts #any of my stories (& he keeps viewing them all the time literally seconds after i post them) #he never said a single word about this account #he even resists texting me there even tho i said i don't use my priv anymore #(i deleted facebook & messenger so we only text on instagram) #& it drives me crazy because i feel like he's probably just laughing at me in secret & i feel embarrassed #& i regret showing it to him #i don't even need him to read my stupid posts but it would be nice to hear one good word like #idk #it doesn't matter ignore me i'm just mad #but sincerely can you hear me?*

[derpinette]

as soon as i want to relax i start thinking about how vulnerable my vitals are

#like when it is time for me to sleep or on the bus or just walking about outside #i always have my sides “hugged” sort of & i always worry about the back of my neck showing #( could entice someone into stabbing me there ) like on the bus or in class i keep thinking about how easily #someone behind me could just snap & stab me in the neck #i am a paranoid person like this in general in 2019 i was too scared to wear my hair in pigtails because i was paranoid some crazy person #with scissors would cut them off & run away ( sometimes i start thinking too much & it starts going into witchcraft territory ) #( like OMG i am så going to get cursed for a laugh or out of boredom using those !!!!! same with nail grooming i only file ) #anyway so when i try to sleep i keep thinking about how someone could just barge into my house & stab me in the kidneys & chest #& it feels so real so i have to curl up into a ball so the thought goes away #but then i think like any position is stabbable & nothing i do can protect me. no one say guns i am north african #maybe i need to start hiding weapons under my clothes again just to feel safer i used to hide blades in my bra when i was crazy in 2020 #i think i am getting back there lately but surely this is fine whatever. Who caare & i mean that genuinely i have already been there #butUGH I HATE feeling so vulnerable to The Killer like i know what wendy williams means but honestly the thought of not dying scares me moa #kind of like how the anticipation of a needle is scary only you get stabbed or attacked & bludgeoned in various ways #like anyone can do anything at any timeeven when i was a kid i would be walking places & think someone could so easily drop a bomb right no #or how gas cylinders can explode at any moment. & then i start visualizing & Feeling until my ears ring. anyway #sorry for my Sick & Twisted Dark & Sinister Mind #journaling. or like.something.

[ozymoron]

dude its always "be yourself" till youre trans and now suddenly oh i get to nitpick every little thing about you oh that gesture was very feminine made you look like a girl oh youre wearing a shirt thats cream coloured? seems a little feminine to me oh you paint your nails? so youre a girl after all like ???? youre giving me mixed messages here am i meant to be myself or am i meant to conform to your idea of what a man is in order to be accepted as one by you

#⚠️ #one time after i came out my mum saw me lounging around in a black t shirt and she was like oh it made you look like a man thinking it was #compliment but dude i got so mad i was like for fuck sake is that seriously what i have to do to be considered a man is lounge around in a #black t shirt??? lounging around is masculine???? what???????? #i was also just a very angry person in general but still that really confuses me #had a psychiatrist note down shit about my appearance saying whether they thought it was feminine or masculine (they thought it was all #feminine) which was fucking crazy cause i went in for an adhd diagnosis #people just find out youre trans and suddenly start acting like experts on whats feminine and whats masculine and what makes you either #gender like shut the fuck up #can also come from people who they themselves accept some cis men are feminine and some cis women are masculine but suddenly as soon as you #try to transition now you have to be masculine or be feminine or youre not valid in their eyes #its fucking crazy #like if i showed them a dude with long hair theyd be like thats a dude with long hair but as soon as i have my hair long im told to cut it #i can show them a dude in a skirt and theyd probably laugh thinking its funny or some bullshit but theyd still think its a dude in a skirt #but if i wear a skirt suddenly im a girl #i know at the root of all this they truly believe people cant switch genders cause in their minds sex and gender is the same but still its #so annoying especially when they pretend to be accepting or think theyre being accepting and when you challenge them on their transphobia #they get all mad at you and act like youre being rude for criticizing them for doing the bare minimum whilst also just continuing to be #transphobic #like yeah you use my correct name but when im not around you use she/her for me and you say i **want** to be a boy instead of i am a boy bu #when i talk to you about this suddenly im the bad guy like its my fault youre using language for me thats transphobic #like ok man. whatever. #sorry for asking you to be a decent fucking human being toward me and treat me with respect #its like people just treat trans peoples gender like something they can just dismiss like its nothing liek we're just playing pretend or #something #like god its frustrating. i need to cut my mum out of my life fr

[dancing-with-stars]

guys. guys !!!!

#vanu is rambling #ok idk this is gonna b a happy post but i think there are lots of people who love me in this world. or at least enjoy my presence. #like i always always always ALWAYS doubt if my friends or family like me and in my head they all secretly hate me #but like for these past couple months things have been different. #i don’t feel so left out (like i usually do in groups) or alone. #like my friends genuinely want me there like they always ask me to go places with them. and i almost always say no because im so busy or #i just cant but they still ask me everytime. yesterday the whole group was calling and playing a game and i got a bunch of texts like hey #where are you u shud join the call it’s rly fun ! but i just couldn’t bring myself to talk to anyone at that moment. #today they were rly happy when i joined the call and idk it made me feel like. oh. maybe my friends do like me #and also i have two moods: i’m either super talkative or i go into my little shell and don’t say anything/add to a convo. and like during #those moments they’ll be like hey u ok? or they’ll just listen to me talk about ceramics and how fun it is or how much i hate eating pears #and like. we laugh so much together. like i have so much fun with all of them i love every single one of them omg #and scary thing is we might not even be friends after we start college. but yk what? that’s okay i don’t wanna think about that. #because like who cares? i’m not gonna let my fears ab the future ruin my friendships. i’ll always love them anyways. and we’ll always call. #i’m glad i met them. they’re all such beautiful and funny and amazing strong willed-people. they are my friends. #it’s just so crazy to me that they willingly want to spend time w me and are sad when i can’t. and they’re so understanding at the same time #they don’t get mad about it. and like they have mad eng last year in high school so much more enjoyable. #someone told me that this is ur last year do things so when you look back you don’t regret anything- so you can be proud of what you did #and my friends helped me with that. and like i still feel lonely the majority of the class because despite this there’s like a permanent #stain of sadness right there at the bottom of my heart. but they make the hard days more manageable. #like i’ve been on call with these people until ungodly hours at night just laughing and i go to sleep feeling a bit lighter. #they introduced me to the tech side of theater which i never thought i’d get into but here i am. they teach me silly facts and words in asl. #they taught me dances- knowing full well i SUCK at it- because we all had fun with it. theyve taught me it’s OKAY to be vulnerable in #friendships and that sometimes being open/yourself is quite literally the best thing you can do for your own soul and others. they’re cool #people really. really cool people

[cryingforcrocodiles]

Chelsea fans left the stadium after Rodrygo's second goal 😭😭😭 Meanwhile Chelsea hater me:

(yes it's julian and that pic is not fake)

(×&@#&*@#,@,@

okay juju!!! party on!!! im dying tysm for sharing this with me. somehow this feels rlly important.

they rlly left the stadium.. tsk tsk. even man united fans stayed after that disgusting 7-0, STAY UR GROUND!!! RESPECT UR LAND!!!

#well i mean. we arent 11th either #so maybe i dont get it #but HAAA that rlly sucks for me #starting to feel pity outside of my mutuals #like Woah... banter season going crazy #its okay it can happen to anyone #just glad it aint happen to ME 😭😭😭🙏🏿🙏🏿🙏🏿🙏🏿 I THANK GOD EVERYNIGHT #asks #friends #julianalvarezzz #<- i was literally waiting ur ask akdjsjd we always chat after chelsea loses EHDJEJRHHRR #laughed tag #💭 reflect tag

[supercantaloupe]

realizing it probably isn't helping matters that the lyrics i've been blasting into my ears this whole time are "hello love, come in and enter laughing"

#sasha speaks #not NECESSARILY voluntary this was my transcription project so had to listen to it ad nauseum for the past like two weeks #but. damn. shit man #they weren't kidding. that crazy dart can be the start. #but...please...i would love to enter laughing already :( #i wanna talk about me

[dirt-str1der]

I dont care about majima x sagawa btw but i care a lot about their relationship regardless because i want them to have the most toxic dealings and skewed power dynamics with each other as possible and i them both to have increasingly warped perceptions of each other (worlds most incorrect uncle-nephew relationship)

#Listen to my problems #sagawas like majima chan i bought pudding for you since chewing is hard right now and majimas like (muffled) can you kill yourself . and #sagawa is like (laughs) keep up that tone and ill break your jaw again #like obviously sagawa isnt doing charity work putting majima back on his feet because majima has to pull his own weight too but over time #majima became less of an ‘investment’ and more like his hotheaded young apprentice / nephew who is really smart (sagawas very proud of him) #but also doesnt know anything good for himself because hes an idiot and sagawa needs to do everything for him sometimes or he’ll pull the #most ASININE stunts imaginable. like kid i do Good by you and you do the same for me as long as you keep your head down and run the grand. #he cannot fathom why majima wants to claw his way back into the tojo because sagawa Knows shimano and he Knows that shimano is bad news and #will definitely send majima into the jaws of death over and over and seriously what a WASTE of good talent !!! unfortunately majima is the #same type of stupid as his oath brother but it doesnt mean he wants to see the kid get himself killed (wise words from a man who got himself #killed) | and majima ... it was not difficult to start going crazy about sagawa at first sight because he just came out of a very violent #place where every touch meant more torture and pain then suddenly hes being put in the capable hands of a man whos like a fucking angel #sagawa feeds clothes and bathes him and majima cant help but act like being cared for is the worst thing thats ever happened to him theres #too much touching and hes completely dependent on sagawa who checks his weight daily and changes his bandages and cleans his leaky infected #eye and he wants nothing more than to be left alone but he cant do anything by himself and hes too devastated to be grateful. its gross !! #and whenever he inevitably breaks the hell down sagawa is always there to hold and comfort him and what the hell else can he do but seek #comfort in the only person that ‘cares’ about him when sagawa is so good at pretending ... is he pretending ? who gives a fuck anymore man #sagawas punishment and comfort all in one ... hes a means to an end .. hes majimas caretaker and his gaoler. the guy who knows everything #about him and the one who’ll use every last bit of it against him oh god wait #this is just isabelle and emma damnit damnit im gonna go read purromised neverland again

[nomaishuttle]

kings island number one tho i love that place. i wanna go to kings island

#the last couple times we went me and lamp were old enough t go off on our own 😏and yeah we went fucking crazy #we went on so many rollercoasters bc we both love.rollercoasters #LAMP MORE THAN ME LAMPS OBSESSEDDD WITH ROLLER COASTERS #theyre also so scary on them bc they dont scream they legit laugh. and not like a teehehe its like maniacal its rly fjnny #i also dont scream i just go completely stonefaced #my thing with rollercoasters is whej im in line for a rollercoaster i hate rollercoasters when im on a rollercoaster i hate rollercoasters #the second im OFF arollercoaster i love them sm and i say Lets go again Lets go again #and the second im out of the park km like sigh.. i miss rollercoasters 💚 #I DO MISS ROLLER COASTERS THO. EVEN THOUGH MY HEAD ALWAYS HURTS SOOOOO BAD AFTER THEME PARK #we used to go a lot when i was little bc my granny worked at toyota #so we got to go on toyota day 😏 youre jealous i can tell. #and then i think she started taking my cousins instead BOOO BOOOOOO plus we moved farther away so yk. #but now my DAD works at toyota so we got to go last year.. grins #and we also went for i thinkk last years halloween haunt? and the one b4 it

[weirdtenderlove]

deciding i no longer need meds

#i promise this wasn’t a light decision but it also makes me laugh bc Ha what if it’s just a Crazy choice ?! #but that’s why gonna ask doc if i can try..bc i no longer (besides my sisters dad) have triggers so it’s like ?? #i feel even more zombie like and not myself so i just want to like start over n get to know me n my autistic ass #bc my mom is the one who started me on meds to begin w😭😵‍💫

[sewerfight]

when I was around twelve I used to sit at the family computer and send hatemail to a white french dude named Jacques who was a self proclaimed communist on Tumblr. This was back in the day when you didn't need a blog to send anon hate. I had no real beef with him but I just didn't like his tone. used to send him "SHUT UP Jacques" periodically. and he'd answer every single one of my asks like "who is this?? show your face or I'll fucking kill you" and I'd be like "now now, that doesn't make sense, jacques" all haughty and he'd get so fucking mad at me. One time he posted a selfie and I sent him an ask claiming I was a psychologist and that his hair parting suggested that he wasn't a communist at all. and he took it deliriously serious and went off on a 2,000 word rant. I can remember going to stay at my grandparents over that weekend, so I didn't even respond to the rant until I came back. I could've chosen to end it there, but when I returned, I sent him another ask which was like "psychologist here again: if you were a communist your hair parting would be in the middle. evenly distributed. All behavioural signs point to someone who doesn't take their own values seriously." and he went ballistic. really swearing at me. all caps type beat. he never turned the asks off, btw. which always made me wonder if he didn't know how to, or if he didn't want to cause he was convinced he was fighting a war, and this action would ensure he lost it. anyway this went on for weeks until one day I completely forgot about him like he was some kind of childhood imaginary friend I'd conjured up in my loneliness. but yesterday I happened to recall the whole scenario, because my buddy was like "remember when you were twelve and I came over to your house, and you showed me on the computer how you'd been terrorizing this random French guy for days on end. And you were laughing like fucking crazy. and I said it wasn't funny because he probably had problems, and you were like 'oh.' and you looked a bit guilty for a second, but then you went and got a grapefruit from the kitchen and threw it out of the second story window at my kid brother, who was playing in the street, and then you started laughing again?" Well. when she put it like that, needless to say I felt bad. so Jacques if you're out there I'm sorry I was such a little shit. you had totally normal hair, and you only wanted people to share stuff. If it's any consolation I know every day of my life that I'm probably going to hell for the sick things I have done