#seeking reassurance

[p-perkeys]

It’s up again 😭😭 I still have phenergan and zofran so even if the absolute worst happened I shouldn’t have to be like actually physically sick, right?? Like those two should make me not v* at all??? They’ve always worked in the past but can you get used to them??

#personal #ocd #emetophobia #seeking reassurance

[caelanglang]

The O(ccasionally)samu D(runk)azai

#drunk dazai bc hes the actual alcoholic one #also bc i wanted a very flustered chuuya #YES EVEN IF THEYRE MARRIED ALREADY BC WHY NOT #i hc drunk dazai is still pretty alert but then if he realizes its someone he someone he can trust (chuuya etc) he just goes soft boy mode #soft honest boy ehehe #also occasionally emotional and vulnerable and validation/reassurance seeking and chuuya always knows #okay i will stop rambling this was rotting my mind the past few days #playing wasia project's ur so pretty on the background when i was drawing these #behold. my therapy (real) #bsd #skk #my art #sketch #sketches #bsd dazai #bsd chuuya #established skk

[zeb-z]

also okay. Leo voiding and Foolish going “that’s alright I’ll just wait. I can wait. I wait.” like yeah totem boy that’s all you ever do isn’t it. waiting loyally for Vegetta to come back, for his plans to find fruition, for islanders and federation workers alike to take him seriously, for Leo to return now, just like he waited for her before, keeping patience like none other. he’ll wait - that’s kinda his thing.

#every time foolish goes ‘I don’t really do lore’ and then does shit like this #yeah he’s doing the dramatic rp in lethal company as fuckin clone 99 or Luigi and Mario because his character is not vocal and emotional #it’s subtle like this because his character - as dramatic and silly and seemingly attention seeking as he is - is subtle #when it matters his reactions are quiet #usually - extenuating circumstances aside. we all watched the last purgatory stream #idk idjajfksjfjsjf but like. the fact he’s always the one who’s waiting. who will extend that patience. but he’s also the one left behind #this seems like a good time to bring up when he was left in the nether again kfjsjfjr yknow? #he waits. and he waits. and he waits. and he waits. and nobody takes him seriously in the meantime #he waits for Leo just like he’s been doing for the last few months. reassuring himself and bad she just voided. man #mcyt #qsmp #q!foolish #z speaks

[kuruk]

help men will describe emotional cheating and go "I know I shouldn't feel guilty but I do for some reason.." Well that's because you go on weekly dates with your old ex girlfriend who you say you were deeply in love with and never wanted to break up with and who just gave you an "intense wave of feelings" when reuniting and she hugs you and kisses your cheek and you're hiding it on purpose and justify it with "my wife has her own friend group too and I don't need the details" ... sorry I feel like people don't even consider that cheating isn't just sex your partner typically isn't just a friend you have sex with so

#and emotional cheating leads to physical cheating #it's just a phase of it like if you did this to a single woman it would clearly be flirting with her and seeing where things go #if you feel guilty it's because you know that you've been swayed emotionally and are seeking that out further in secret. #looking for reassurance but just feeling that guilt alone says everything. you wouldn't feel that way if you weren't

[satans-knitwear]

Im home at a sensible time ✨

Treat me ~ Tip me ~ More of me

#I am slightly sunburnt though. So that is.... Ouchy. #For a whole day of crying...my makeup has stayed impressively in place. I was shocked tbh #Oh wow i dont wanna exist rn. Im gonna seek validation online to reassure myself of the reasonableness of my existence #Satans knitwear #Pretty lingerie #Lace lingerie set #Lace top stockings #Patterned stockings #Holdups #Lace top holdups #Seamed stockings #bi girl #cheeky #wlw #🍑 is served #🍑 take a bite

[mar-im-o]

#passive influence #idk why talking in tags feels safer than talking in the caption #but anyways #idk #wren was in cocon for a while #and ig like #we made this? #idk ive got a lot going on atm and it's #confusing #but sometimes i need reassurances that I'm not screwing this all up #so i figured maybe other ppl need that too? #maybe ill make more like this #was like #a good way to finally face my fear and try comics #but also i hate making content about DID bc i dont want it to seem like attention seeking #maybe ill show this to my therapist :D #yeah #actually DID #DID #OSDD #systemblr #didblr

[patroclusdefencesquad]

it's about the hands

#something something rochester always seeking out jane's hand #and the moment she needs to reassure him she knows exactly what he needs #jane eyre

[lousydrawingsforgoodpeople]

#redraw #seeking reassurance doesn’t help #doodles #bad art #lousy drawings #doodle #positivity #self love #healing #recovery

[tanadrin]

A "new US civil war movie" feels like a bad joke, and also an insult, since most of the people behind it will be safe in a bunker or a foreign country for the real thing in 5-10 years. But I get that being american means being undeserving of sympathy for this kind of thing, so I hope it's at least good entertainment for you (the movie and the real thing).

i suspect you are the same combative, doomer anon who has shown up in my ask box before. further asks in this vein will be ignored. because listen. going through life reading everything people say in a maximally negative manner, imputing malign intent where none exists, and reacting with complete hostility to everyone around you all the time makes you an asshole.

you are acting like an asshole, anon. perhaps you have a sympathetic backstory--depression, grief, anxiety, i dunno--that is an explanation of your asshole behavior, but it doesn't matter, because you are responsible for how you treat other people, both in meatspace interactions and anonymous online interactions.

and i want to be really clear about this because i see this genre of behavior all over the internet, and on social media sites in particular, and i am simply exhausted of patience for it. your overflowing anger, your doomerism (and doomerism is a deeply reactionary sentiment i also have no more patience for), your need to lash out at somebody, anybody, including pseudonymous strangers online--none of that need be a permanent fixture of your life, but it is an attractor state that requires some effort to escape. that work involves cultivating friendships based on shared positive likes, learning to let go of your anger, learning not to interact with kneejerk hostility and defensiveness, and learning emotional maturity (I recommend Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents; though in this case you are the "parent" I think).

all of which is doable--but only if you are willing to not act like an asshole, and decide not to make being an asshole a load-bearing part of your identity. frankly i do not care what you do. i would like it if everyone could be happy, but that's not the world we live in. fortunately for you, your misery comes from your own asshole behavior, and not from externally imposed conditions like war or social breakdown. unfortunately for you, most assholes i have known in my life are deeply wedded to being assholes, view their asshole behavior as a sign of their wisdom and perspicacity.

it is not. it is actually pathetic for a grown-ass human being to interact with strangers like this. like genuinely, deeply embarrassing. grow up.

#this is the behavior of an emotional adolescent testing boundaries and/or seeking reassurance #but you're not my teenage son so i don't have to deal with it

[sunmoontruth-stiles]

I need a completely rewritten teen wolf series with Derek Hale as the main character. I think it would heal me.

#we follow Derek from New York. Laura left for beacon hills. it’s been six years since he was back but he hasn’t heard from her #and hes going stir crazy waiting. he packs up and travels back. it’s almost too much immediately. he still can’t get a hold of Laura #he can’t resist going home. it’s like a natural pull that guides him back. all at once he’s 16 again. staring at the wreckage of his life #deputy stilinski is sherrif now. it’s reassuring in the slightest that the police force seems to have moved on from how corrupt it was #he catches her scent and it’s putrid. bile catches in his throat. he seeks it out. still in denial to what he knows it means. #when he finds Laura it’s like the world ends all over again. he can’t stand to see her like this. he gives her a proper burial. #the best he can do at least #he visits Peter. he’s not the man Derek remembers- so full of fire and cunning. their relationship may have been strained at times. #often Derek felt more like Eve being swayed by the snake than a normal friendship #but this isn’t the sharp tongued uncle who guided him. this is a broken shell. all that remained of his family. he was so lost. #22 but he barely knew how to function without his family- his pack paving the way #Laura handled everything. she got the apartment. she made sure they had food. Derek looks back and feels so useless #he was so lost in his grief. Laura must of felt the same way but she never let them drown in it #she made sure he got his GED. even got him to enroll in community college classes. #he took them online. he never was able to warm up to people the same way. he used to be so full of life. now he just wanted to be left alone #he studied English. never finished his degree. doesn’t look like he ever will now. he can’t go back to Laura and his shared home. #can’t bare to see another shell of a home #he vents to the vacant audience of Peter and his cold fixed eyes #Derek leaves. he wants to promise he’ll return soon #but promises feel costly these days #he decides to go back to the reserve. maybe he can find some clue as to what happened to Laura #someone lured her here. someone who knew them and their history here #his mind went to the worst. Kate. why would she go through the trouble six years later. why wait so long. #Derek couldn’t stomach the thought of facing her. he focused on the woods. the scents were all over the place. #clearly multiple people had been through here recently. two scents were much stronger. Derek follows them #but when he hears the crunch of leaves he realizes why the scents are so strong. they’re still here #he ducks behind some trees. listening in on their conversation. but an echo of their scent catches his attention #he spots an inhaler on the ground. he puts two and two together and swipes it from the leaves. #he comes out once they’re closer. tossing over the inhaler- he figures they’ll leave. dumb kids messing around in the woods #he reminds them this is private property. though that may not be true anymore. he recognizes the scent of a new beta. interesting.

[rotisseries]

max mayfield and mike wheeler same person but the difference is an avoidant attachment style vs an anxious one

#stranger things #byler #mike wheeler #max mayfield #madwheeler #in case it isn't obvious I think max is avoidant and mike is anxious #I feel like mike doesn't immediately look like an anxious attachment person bc the show is trying to avoid giving us his emotions #so he's not constantly up people's ass like “do u hate me?🥺” #but I ultimately feel like “needs constant reassurance and takes small things personally” is sooo mike wheeler #and he does actually often seek reassurance but only really from will bc that's the only person he feels safe enough to do that with #and he's not avoidant bc he never really. pushes away intimacy actually. (aside from the airport hug) #he might not initiate if he's feeling insecure about how the relationship is or whatever but he won't actually shut it down #whereas max absolutely goes out of her way to push people away when they get too close bc she's worried they'll leave first

[p-perkeys]

The rate of stomach virus in my area is the highest it’s been all year 🥲 actually in the whole state 🥲🥲 dear God I’m so scared why does it have to be a thing. I already have zofran and phenergan. My anxiety was JUST starting to ease off too. Life’s a bitch. Also- what the fuck kind of brain gets scared like this over vomit. It’s pretty ridiculous if you think about it but I can’t help it. I’d quite literally rather die.

Quite.

Literally.

#personal #ocd #emetophobia #seeking reassurance #will I live or will I die #I kinda want to die #it’s giving lack of bodily control and that’s VERY SCARY

[starflungwaddledee]

Hey got a question, is it normal for your heartbeat to beat rapidly wherever you look at really tense or angsty scenes?

It's Just a question I had in mind

putting these together because they're clearly related. i admit these have me a little bit stumped, but i'll take this in good faith and do my best! under the cut because of length.

topics include: physiological reactions to fiction, emotional reactions/empathy of creators, and finally addressing the unspoken question present in asks like this.

"is it normal to have a physiological reaction (heart beat, jitters, excitement, sadness, etc) to fiction"

absolutely! i cannot overstate how common it is to have reactions of any wide variety to fiction. the whole point of storytelling is to make you feel things! the reactions you have, their intensity, and the specific media or genre you'll have those reactions to will vary person to person. in regards to angst in particular, like i've said on this topic before: reactions will vary. some people might get excited, others might get sad, others might feel it like a gut punch but in a really good and cathartic way. none of these are better or worse or more normal or more abnormal than the other.

"do i as a creator have an emotional reaction to the work i'm creating?"

i personally do, sure. i was actually quite explicit in the tags of the comic that came right before this ask that i found it hard to draw, because seeing kirby so sad was emotionally pulverising to me. do all creators? no. do i feel a strong emotional reaction to all scenes? no. or all types of content creation? no. for me, prose is actually much easier to tackle than illustration; i can write trauma and suffering and psychological devastation until the cows come home, but drawing it is a different matter. consuming the work of others is different again. and this is different for everybody. am i somehow morally better or more empathetic than an artist that doesn't struggle to draw characters sad? hell no! being able to represent- in fiction- a strong emotion generally requires that you empathise with or at least understand that emotion. sometimes creators actually have to be able to turn this off to be able to create the content we make; the way we turn off strict adherence to reality in order to write fantasy. if we couldn't do this, content across the board- art, movies, novels- would be flattened to nothing but the cheeriest and most mediocre parts of our day to day lives. no fun monsters (because those aren't real). no challenges to rise above (because those make us sad). no characters who have different experiences to us (because how could we imagine or feel for that). and it would be okay for like... twenty minutes of all books containing 'the sun was shining and i woke up on time and had a yummy breakfast', but then it would suck, sorry. conflict and imagination are the root of content.

"it's just a question I had in mind".

a way to think about this might be; would you ask these questions about genres that aren't angst? would you ask "is it normal to be happy when these characters finally reunite" or "is it normal to feel resolution in response to a happy ending" or "is it normal to feel excitement when a character has their cool hero moment". perhaps it's because your reaction to angst is something you construe as negative, but if you wouldn't doubt your reactions to cheerful content, then there's no reason to doubt the reactions you have to angst either; these are just reactions! fiction is designed to make us feel things, but what you feel will be up to you. no one feeling or response is better or worse than any others.

lastly, i feel like there is an unspoken question here that i don't like.

and maybe you didn't intend it. i'm going to extend that grace to you, and because you seem to need reassurance about this (though i will not be reassuring about this further. i do not like reassurance seeking from strangers and this is a boundary i am setting right now), this is not an attack or even a criticism. your questions are fine if they are coming from a place of curiosity and- i simply assume- that these are new or difficult concepts to you that you have yet to have explored or explained.

but on the good faith assumption you didn't intend it, and wouldn't want to do this again (especially if you message other creators), i think you should be aware.

because it sounds like this: "do the people who make sad/angsty/dark content care at all or are you heartless to the suffering (of these characters). is angst/dark content made by bad people?" i felt it the previous time i got a question like this too when it explicitly stated "you seem like a nice person", as if being a nice person was in contrast with what i was creating.

please. we are just people. the relative light or darkness of the content you make says absolutely nothing about your morals, your real life attitudes, or your ability to be an empath.

someone making cute animal art could be a school yard bully. someone writing a complex sci-fi warhorror fic could be the most altruistic and compassionate soul in the world.

in my experience, creators are some of the most empathetic people i have ever met, and many of them know their craft intimately. these are people capable of stepping into the shoes of others as easily as breathing. of sitting down at their work station every day and finding inside themselves a way to answer "how would this really feel?" so clearly and honestly that they can put it onto the paper for you to feel it too.

#being able to storytell in such a way that the reader feels something is a skill!! it is a Skill and not an accident or a moral failing. #if what someone's work makes you feel is not something you like; don't consume that work! #again... if angst is not for you you can block it from my work with this tag: cw angst #if it really hurts you my work may not be for you! this is a niche i am interested in and am *very grateful* to find others here are as wel #have seen this surprise expressed by other kirby angst/dark creators. it's a seemingly unlikely place but also the most likely place. #lastly: unempathetic creators also exist and are no better or worse than empathetic creators. #because lacking empathy is not a flaw and it also forms absolutely NOTHING about your morals. okay anyway. #once more: i will not be offering anymore reassurance to reassurance seeking. it makes me deeply uncomfortable. thanks. #also not to toot my own horn but that was a banger ending line. if you read to the end that's your reward. #replies

[danielslaw]

SEASON 3 EPISODE 10 // SEASON 5 TRAILER JOHNNY LAWRENCE AND DANIEL LARUSSO

#johnny lawrence #daniel larusso #ralph macchio #william zabka #cobra kai #cobrakaiedit #ckedit #fandom : cobra kai #lawrusso #lawrussoedit #tsarinagifs #tsarinaedits #(seeking reassurance in the season 5 one though)

[conarcoin]

actually (i'm sure i've made this post before but) because i always get people whenever i tag a post ocd being like "that's an ocd thing??? do i have ocd???" and the post is just generally about unwarranted anxieties. i feel like i have to explain

intrusive thoughts and unreasonable worries are not, in isolation, an indicator of ocd. ocd is an anxiety disorder, so it is just based in the same things as other anxiety disorders

if you find yourself having to DO SOMETHING in order to "combat" your thoughts or make sure they're not true - that's when it gets into ocd territory, because that's a compulsion. that's when you should be talking to a professional about ocd

#and those compulsions don't have to be external #checking/excessive research/reassurance seeking are compulsions

[vexenya]

Maybe a hot take but if for whatever reason you cannot boycott maybe keep that to yourself? Don’t go around telling everyone and the dog “omg I have to eat McDonald’s 😢 I can’t afford anything else” because 1) there are plenty of better and cheaper options, trust me I’ve been there and I didn’t eat McDonald’s a single time when I was there. And 2) when you say things like that you’re clearly trying to get people to sympathize with you and reassure you that you’re not a bad person and you’re not doing anything wrong. People are literally dying, this situation is not about you.

Decades in the future, when all this is in the history books, people in Palestine won’t remember that you couldn’t stop drinking Starbucks because it’s the only coffee shop in your area. They’ll remember that people in a first world country refused to do the bare minimum to help them.

#palestine #free palestine #kind of a rant #I’ve seen a lot of posts like this lately and it kinda irked me #like why are you seeking sympathy over not boycotting when people are literall DYING #please if you’re struggling with food. don’t get fast food like McDonald’s. it’s a single meal that can’t be stored in the fridge #and in the same vein #instant coffee is between 1-6 dollars depending on how much you’re getting and it will last you much longer than a single 8 dollar Starbuck #I’m not trying to like. shame anyone or anything. but please stop seeking out reassurance and comfort over not boycotting #sometimes you’re gonna feel bad and guilty in life. that’s just human nature