#scb stuff

[soulless-computerbug]

Toby:

Oak, birch, aspen trees, sunlight filtering through the leaves, the rush of the north wind. Babbling brooks and creeks, a trout jumping and splashing on the surface. Campfires, woodsmoke, ash and dust rising from a glowing plume into the starry night. Bonfires. House fires. Dumpster fires in the cold icy streets. Car exhaust and drunk drivers on empty lonely highways, flat energy drinks in the cup holders. The sound of splitting wood, cracking ice, falling stone. Granite sparkling in the dusk light. Icy cold fingertips pressed against your palm, nails gently biting your skin.

Kate:

Stale cigarette smell in old musty carpet. The clack of billiard balls against each other, quiet chatter and laughter, low blues music crackling through old speakers. Blues, classic rock, hard rock, headbanging to old punk music in the car with your friends, parked in the lot after a highschool game. Smiling so wide your cheeks ache. Pounding throbbing feet on concrete, the rough grooves of brick and mortar under your nails. The chokehold of terror in your chest, the moon through douglas firs and redwood trees. February breeze at 3am, cold air seeping under your jacket, the flannels of your pants. Cold fingers, cold toes, steaming hot water that stings like pure bliss. The taste of medicine that follows the ringing of an alarm.

Cody:

Larks and robins at 5am. The smell of black coffee and old books, the rustle of papers and shuffle of feet. Linoleum tile under leather doc marten soles. Rye grass and blue river water, stormy gray skies. The thwap of latex gloves against your wrist like a second skin. Bubbling, fizzing, foaming, colors shifting from green to gray to blue to orange. Apple slices as you scratch note after note onto old notebook paper. Losing your voice after screaming for hours, dull migraines and illusory palinopsia. Lyssavirus, crutzfeldt-jakobs disease, marburgvirus, all neatly labeled in perfect little vials. Lying in wait.

#creepypasta #ticci toby #toby rogers #kate the chaser #kate millens #cody mccaffrey #x virus #my posts #scb stuff #my writing #liam mccaffrey

[scrollypoly]

Doodled a little guy for a new pfp

#my creechur #ben drowned #behavioral event network #creepypasta #creepypasta fanart #my art #my posts #eviecore #scb stuff

[silvsarts]

more scb au i’m really head over ass in this au aren’t I

Featuring: Graecie and Magic but theyre 100x less chill because in this au, people actually have feelings about their friends turned incendiary assholes (lookin at u owen and krow) and will not take any of their shit lying down

Also for extra angst: it’s never addressed but my personal hc is that c!soup feels guilty for saving c!owen during the coma arc after he’s revealed to be a terrible person. not expounding on that but play with the idea if you’d like :)

#silvsarts #scb au #outsiders smp #outsiderssmp #should i still tag owen bc ik his tag is filled with rats stuff now #el as well for that matter #ah well fuck it #OwengeJuiceTV #soupforeloise #graecie #magicsings

[themilkiemooth]

Witchs and Dreams Au

Sooo I had an Au idea and I decided to just doodle out a but of it! (apologize for my spelling)

in this lil idea sun and moon are sprites 

Y/N is a child that was given to Eclipze after their parental figure had to flee due to a evil force

Eclipse in this Au is the big bro of Sun and Moon and the Guardian of Y/N for the time being 

i have digital art of this au but im to anxious to post them as of yet honestly suprided that iwas able to post these :P

#myart #artwork #sunandmoon #sundrop #moondrop #fnaf au #fnaf daycare attendant #sketch #traditional sketch #fnaf scb #doodles #brrrrrrrr #havent done fandom stuff in years #kinda spooky :P

[hwajin]

#! — ᴍᴇᴢᴢᴀɴɪɴᴇ | scb

genre: fluff, angst (tiniest bit suggestive)

pairing: knight!changbin x afab!princess!reader

wc: 9.6k

warnings/ contents: slow burny, arranged royal marriage stuff, forbidden love, friends to lovers, chracter death

note: this is my fic for @hyunverse 'war of hearts (until kingdom come)' collab!! it was SO fun to write this and especially with all the ppl participating in the collab, make sure to check all of em out!! this was my first every royal au thing to write so be kind on me 🤞🏻🫶

Ten in the morning. You had bathed, had gotten your hair prepared for the day, had been put into an outfit, too tight and insufferable. Had eaten breakfast, had conversed shortly with your parents, catching up on the latest news, boring and little informative. You had gone back to your room, had taken out a book to read which you couldn’t concentrate on. All too little happened, far too little time has passed.

Meet me after supper, by your balcony.

Changbin’s signature under the short note, and the message drove you to insanity. You hadn’t seen him in a while, his work occupying him and his time more often than it was to your liking; knights came home bruised up and injured, their horses distressed and tired. Changbin being the grand commander of his battalion never missed to take the most damage – the determination and his well-intended, devoted persona, as much as you loved him for it, always prone to trouble him.

Changbin and you had started a friendship a few years back. It was unlikely, unusual, for a princess and a knight to be as close knitted as the two of you were. Yet, when Changbin had started to work directly under your father, the king himself, and had gotten higher in his position of knight, you and him had chances upon chances to converse and mingle; be it on royal circulars or ascots, when discussing other kingdoms and the safety of your own, or inner economy and politics. It had been impossible to not acquaint the other, and your characters had seemed to connect naturally, much like two pieces of a puzzle, seamless, fitting to the other. Changbin was one you held dear to your heart, one you wouldn’t bear to lose – though your father didn’t approve of it. Had warned you countless times that your relation was of ill quality, that his direct commander was of no good influence to his child, no one you should converse with let alone call a friend – hence why tonight — much like all night, any time he wished to see you, speak to you —, Changbin offered your balcony as a place to catch up. You barely met elsewhere whenever you did, as it was by far the only place in the palace not watched by soldiers – those of who had told on you and Changbin often enough in the past for the two of you to grow cautious and careful. Seeing each other in the halls or the ballroom occasionally yet never speaking much, only conversing with eyes and sheepish smiles, reserving actual conversations when you were in lonesome. When it was the two of you only, left to talk about deeper-lying subjects than the ones you were used to with people other, than Changbin ever had the chance to. On your balcony, it was always the very pure of you both; no facets, no obligations. Him and you, in your most utter nature.

You missed your friend dearly.

Supper couldn’t have come any slower. You had been dreading the day and wishing for night, had watched the sun set behind the horizon ever so slowly, taking its sweet time – at least your balcony had always had the prettiest view. The book you had been hoping to finish today was lain forgotten on your vanity, about half read. Your mind had been elsewhere the entire evening, maids having to repeat questions second times to ask of your opinion on hair or attire choices, and you’d apologised each and every time. Your mind's been always in a frenzy when Changbin returned from the battlefield. The utter worry you bore for him, the one you’d call your best of friends, was more than you could manage with a clear mind, the notice of his duties calling always prone to set your heart to uneasy condition, only tranquillising when you saw the man in flesh and bones and with lack of harsh bruises, preferably. Though that was seldom the case.

“Might anything be bothering you, child?”

Your fathers stern voice, and you jolted up from the confines of your thoughts. You had only been poking around in your food, appetite lost if there was any to begin with, thoughts neither in the current nor on any subject talked about, thus not participating in your parents’ conversations. You blinked some before meeting his eyes, managing a smile apologetic.

“Yes- no. Nothing bothering me, I apologize. I’m perfectly fine.”

You’d always been a bad liar. You gifted another smile, hoping the matter would be dropped. You weren’t one to be untruthful to your parents, always speaking your mind when needed, standing your ground when necessary. Though when the name Seo Changbin fell, polite talking always turned into agitated speech and angry voices, and you were all but in the mood for such; so you kept the reason for your state a secret.

“I have just been feeling quite faint since morning, perhaps it’s the weather.”

Going back to your merely untouched food, the additional information surely leaving them convinced. It wasn’t a lie, either, much to your dismay; you had been feeling rather ill, with worry and anticipation for your friend, though neither King nor Queen would have to know of it.

“Oh dear, then maybe you shall be able to rest upstairs, no? Leave the plate full, honey, hurry to bed.”

Your mother had always been the softer of the two. You had grown old without siblings, an only child, your mother always the closest person to your heart. Which never meant you didn’t love your father dearly; yet the bond connecting you and the Queen had always been the stronger one.

Your eyes found hers, despite not having expected her offer you took it gratefully all the same. You knew your father wasn’t fond of your leaving early; arguing that it was high time to start being raised a Queen, a soon to be one, and excusing yourself due to nuisances such as sheer faintness was all but justifiable. Your mother shot her husband a glare, though, comforting hand on his arm; signalling that it was well. You left with a quick bow of the head, hurrying and increasing your step only after the vast doors of the main hall had closed behind you - your father preferred you walked around the hall in acceptable tempo.

Your shoes sounded up in quick manner against the tile floors of the halls, ricocheting against the tall space. Your dress threw waves at your fastened feet, breaking in tides against your figure. It was dark, corridors lit only by occasional candle; it was enough to see staff pass by, maids and already returned soldiers, and whenever they were in proximity you decreased your step. All greeting with a nodded “Princess.”, before passing by to their own affairs, and you merely nodded back, impatient to eventually, finally reach the comfort of your room, your beloved balcony. You weren’t certain if Changbin would be awaiting you already, he was always the last to finish his business with his men, managing to rest later than he’d like himself. He was commander after all, so, prone to overworking.

You opened your dark wooden doors in haste, making room and lighting a candle before struggling with the matches, your hands shaking, your breath hiccuping. Opening the glass doors of your balcony – to see Changbin standing by the edge of it, strong, linen covered arms propped up against the stone railings, shoulders hunched over in manner relaxed, observing eyes watching the view. It had always been a favourite of him, simply laying eyes on the vast space of the palace from above, on nature all around. He said it to be calming, especially in your proximity.

“Changbin.”

The man turned at the sound of your voice, away from his dearly loved sky and to face your eyes. Only now you were granted the ability to see the light bruises painting around his eyes, red, angry scratches by his chin and jaw; though you didn’t have time to pay mind to it just yet, only registering his presence without much thinking – you needed a hug, and if it was the last thing you could wish for.

He’d always had a steady build, and falling into his arms had perpetually granted stability you sought anywhere around, in the loneliness of your occupation and the worries of your future, stability no one except him was ready to grant. It took his steady arms and pouding chest, his pumping heart which seemed to increase in tempo whenever near you, for your mind to come to ease. It needed him on your balcony for you to forget about duties and crowns. With him on your balcony you were you, in your simplest form.

It took both of you several moments to finally discharge from the hug, and only after your bodies parted you got to inspect the state of your friend. Your fingers painted over the velvet under his right eye, only imagining the sting it caused. Your thumb caressed the fresh scratch right by his chin, your brows merely scrunching at the pain that must have caused – you would take it all from him, if you could. Would bear it all with him if it was any possible, if it meant shortage of his aching. It wounded anew whenever you’d see him after returning from the battlefield – you were well aware of his own wish for this profession – wanting to fight for what’s good laid in his nature – yet your own desire to know him safe and sound stemmed from egotism you never believed dissipating. He was your closest friend at last, imagining him in anguish of any kind cut at your own heart deeper than anything other was able to.

“Do not look at me like this. I am fine.”

Changbin. Always the personified reassurance, always the calm anchor that never allowed you to seed worry for him. That would give his life to keep you safe, that would sacrifice himself if it meant knowing you in happiness. It was sheer impossible for you not to bear worry. Though you always disguised, for his sake.

“I missed you. I’m glad you’re back.”

And with that you fell into his arms once more. Changbin embraced you wholly, holding your body so tight to his it was nearly uncomfortably suffocating, though you’d never dare to mind. The man buried his face in your nape, keeping there for a moment or two before parting again. An exchanged smile before a laugh followed, a laugh filled with relief, with reassurance; not one of Changbin’s departments was ever safe, no given guarantee he’d be able to return at all. Left and forgotten for times end on the battlefield; it was always a scenario open, one that you feared during sleepless nights.

Yet he was here, returned this time, like he always did, always promised.

“So, tell me everything.”

You rumpled up your heavy dress, wishing to change out of it as the setting sun indicated you’ve been wearing cottoned corset and linen silk for far longer than your liking allowed. You settled on your designated metallic chair, Changbin took seat on the other one. You’ve taken ownership over both a few years back – the maids and cooks in the kitchen still asked about the mystery of their disappearance, and you and Changbin found amusement in it each time. You had been practically children when you had snuck into the hot chambers, hiding from guards and personnel and getting hold of two cheap looking sitting attires because sitting on the stone porch of the balcony had become unbearable over time. You had sprinted up as fast as it was possible back then, had rushed with adrenaline and laughed your hearts out at the relief of not getting caught, of succeeding with your master plan. You had set the chairs on the balcony facing the vastness of the palace, just so you could have a look onto the sunset if you wished. The chairs haven’t moved since – no guard ever checked the privacy of your own four walls let alone the tiny balcony, so you’ve been sure your dear possessions would be safe and sound there for as long as you wanted them to be.

“You wish for me to tell you everything? Princess, I’m sure you have far more precious information about the happenings within the palace than my ever boring talk about the battlefield.”

Typical of him to deny his worth, and you huffed in bitter amusement. Your heart felt warm with the name he chose to call you; princess. He had started to drop your name and call you by your rank in fun initially, though the word contained in his addressing you, never without a slight teasing behind. You liked hearing the title out of his mouth the most. For with him it didn’t come with a notion of fearful respect, but utter friendship instead.

“Oh, I have told you the battlefield isn’t boring. Brutal, yes, but I am not weak, you are well aware.”

He was aware, though it wasn’t in Changbin’s own enjoyment to tell stories of war. It was his passion and well-earned duty to fight and protect, yet he always despised the idea of talking about matters of violence outside said matter itself; because he knew you would never fully understand, would never fully support said wanting and needing to fight and protect, because it didn’t seem fit to discuss such cruciality, with you specifically. Not because he thought you weak – but because he cherished you. Adored you. Loved you. Because his emotions for you grew deeper than artificial talk about duties and doings, politics and battlefields. Because every word he’d tell would make him wish you’d say instead, drinking up your utterances like the sweetest wine, following the soundwaves of your voice as though visualising them. When with you, talk about himself grew null, the wish to emerge in conversation about you sprouted prompt and plump within his chest, like ripe fruits on greenest bushes.

“I am aware, and yet your stories are far more exciting. I wish to hear them all – any news on your father? I hope you hadn’t started a fight while I was gone, you’re still on good terms? Oh, and how is Jisung? I haven’t got the chance to talk to him yet, is he doing well?”

Question after question, simply to hear you talk. And talk you did. Talked beyond answering Changbin’s questions, talked about this and that and oh how boring it’s been without him, talked until your guts hurt from laughing and until the sun started setting behind the saffron horizon, until first nightbirds began singing their lullabies. Until you warned Changbin to make haste and leave – when the clock struck ten your maids would come up, to get you ready and washed up for bed. Both of you reluctant, both of you hesitant to let go of the evening hug you shared, arms around the other, wrapped closely to hold body against body. It was you who pulled apart with a sigh, one so heavy it cut at Changbin’s heart. How he wished he could stay on this very balcony till midnight and beyond, could lay beneath those navy duvets of your bed with you. How he wished to be closer to you eternally, physically and emotionally, however humanly and inhumanly possible. Changbin was aware he was grasping at straws – a soldier and a princess would be one kind of a marriage across the entirety of the kingdom, having never heard of such love made believe it didn’t exist. And yet Changbin climbed over the stoned railings in reluctance, said a last goodbye with saddened eyes though you had disappeared behind your curtains too early to catch it. You were blissfully unaware of Changbin’s tragic plight – the man wasn’t all too sure if it was a good rather than a bad thing. He was aware that he couldn’t give you the life you deserved, the life you wished for. That marriage to a prince was an inevitable prediction in near future, that your heart didn’t burn for him like his did. And yet his mind’s contents were images of you when he laid in his bed that night, replaying in painful reminders until he had fallen asleep, at last.

___ . ꫂ

“Seungmin? As in Kim Seungmin? – Father, you cannot be serious.”

The sweet alluring euphoria you had felt rushing through your limbs the day prior had made way for even greater disappointment the following morning; breakfast had been served at ten as per usual, your family containing three had talked newest reports, focusing on especially the freshly returned troupes. Changbin hadn’t told you yesterday – as he seldom did – that though his battalion suffered minor loss the return hadn’t succeeded in whole unison. Soldiers had let their lives on fields beyond the kingdom, would never return to families, would live on in sole memory. Your father revealed such fragile information as though it was any other occurrence, simply an additional point of his list of news, as though his heart didn’t beat faster or tore in two at the sheer cruciality of the fact – your mother barely looked pained, continuing to spoon at her soup as though lost lives were barely a vanity as any other. You wondered if their detachment sprouted from year long experience, and you wondered and feared if your own heart would ever carve itself to a shape theirs had long accustomed. Not of stone, yet used to tragedy.

It was only after a break of short nature that your father discarded his silvern spoon by his right, turning towards you, waiting until you have met his gaze. Stopped eating yourself you listened to his following words, words you wanted to rip out his throat before they had the chance to escape his mouth, before they had the power to embed themselves to reality.

“Yes, Prince Kim Seungmin. His father and I had been conversing through letters and seemed it best fitting to arrange a marriage between him and you. He is most eligible, you would make a great pair. Not mentioning the power our kingdoms will have combined – you truly have no reason to be upset.”

The words like a heavy whip against your body, the spoken death sentence seeding rotten in your brain. Marriage was inevitable in your position and occurred quickly when only set in stone – meaning if your father’s decision was ultimate, you had weeks, at best, to count before walking down the aisle, before spending a life with a man you merely known by name. Your parents had never seemed a flaw in such arrangements, never understanding your wish for love, and to marry after it. After all, their marriage had been arranged and their parents’ was – mutual liking at best was unavoidable when you only reached the point of living together, and love was a mere privilege that would simply come to those who let it.

Only you never befriended their worldview, never believed the marriages they’d speak of were ones of true admiration. Admittedly, you wouldn’t be able to know better – you were simply a reader of written romance who had never found the luck to live through such feeling yourself, only words on thick pages that showed the very marriages you so dearly wished for. As a child you had believed your parents were in love, though you had started questioning that in your adolescence. They seemed happy, surely, as far as you observed. Though you doubted love had come to them passionately or fervidly, doubted a feeling as great as no other had ever swept them off their step. And your heart mourned, pained at the possibility that you may die with your life never be turned upside down by a person loved dearly and intimately, that the only destiny, the only availability of romance was a prince you felt nothing for.

Kim Seungmin; the name fell off your father’s mouth before you had the chance to cut his word off. Kim Seungmin, the prince of the neighbouring kingdom, a man so perfect you’ve never seen one like him. He was nice, he was charming, he was stiff when in absence of a familiar face. He was your parents’ favourite, he was the man everyone would die to have – he was your future husband, it seemed, the future King to your Queenship, and you felt nothingness for him. There was neither love nor hate; solely nothing. The thought alone enrolled panic within your guts, cold sweat spreading on the cushions of your palms, the little hairs by the back of your nape standing straight in fear – you as though saw your future before you, a future you couldn’t help but dread already.  

“Father, I barely know him, you cannot think of making me marry him by the end of the season, what do you-“

A heavy hand on the vitric of the table and you stopped your enraged flow of words momentarily, respect for your father overshadowing the fire that flamed up within you.

“You will get to know him. Besides, I have mentioned that he is most eligible. He is kind and humorous, he has a brain he knows to use. He has a name and a kingdom just like you do – you do not have anything to be upset about.”

Hot anger gnawing at your insides, seethed within the pit of your gut and dared to overcook in tears any nearing second. You didn’t wish to cry before your parents, before your father. Didn’t want to explain whichever context could possibly bother you to such hopeless state, didn’t want to show weakness in a matter so foreign to them. You blinked away the water in your eyes, observing mother and father exchanging a look, if questioning or degrading you couldn’t tell. They continued with their food, unaware of your inner turmoil, or choosing to ignore it. They were aware of your differing view on marriage, on your wish to marry after love, though years had passed since you had last spoken on the matter – it never let to compromises, hence felt aimless to convince and explain. Although, you felt the need to explain right then and there, to change their minds. For it might be the only chance you’d get, for your future might write itself if you failed to speak up now. And yet you felt a fool for scrambling for right words, for your inability to convince with great arguments and remarks. Because altogether, there wasn’t anything you could say, not to them, anyways. Because the search for love was null to them though tore apart your entire being. Thoughts and feelings head over heel while your parents waited for an answer, received only a lack thereof.

Only after counted minutes your voice filled the hall of the room, when your anger and frustration subsided just enough. Your body felt yet trembling, your interior shaken to the very last bone, though you had collected enough to speak, at last.

“You- you are right, Prince Seungmin would be the most righteous match indeed, he- he has qualities one could only dream of.”

Indifference from your addressees, a calming breath from your side. You wouldn’t allow to be married away without trying to change the outcome, surely. There was fate worse than yours, you were aware, unchangeable fate that one was bound to subject to. Maybe yours was too, maybe all words had been set in stone the moment they had left mouths; and yet you weren’t one to never attempt.

“But I don’t love him. I cannot possibly marry him, because I do not love him.”

Words like a slap against your parents, surely, and a part of you doubted your fate could be exchanged. Judging by the looks on their faces, by the utter disbelief. By the flared nostrils of your father, the deep crease between your mother’s brows. The settlement was set in stone; your father hadn’t asked you about the context, he had informed you. Simply and solely, as he had informed you of the fallen soldiers. As though marriage and death weren’t events of greatest major, as though all was null.

“Sweetheart, listen.”

Your mother’s voice an attempt to comfort, though you’d bet no word she could say would be the words you needed to hear.

“Your father and I are aware that you and we have… different views when it comes to marriage.”

Sensing your prediction to embed into reality you braced yourself from her following words, hoped they wouldn’t wound you too deep at heart. You were too fragile this moment altogether, you weren’t sure how many more hits you could take.

“…but you must marry sooner or later, honey.”

Voice too sweet to your liking for the words within the sugar coat were of bitterest taste.

“You will learn to love the prince, I’m sure of it. You must simply open your heart… leave alone there isn’t truly another… option… if you understand.”

Meeting her eye, questions marking your visage. You sweated, felt hot and cold simultaneously, felt each your senses magnify in overwhelming manner.

“There isn’t any other you love, child. If there was…”, a look to her husband, then back to you. It uneased you. “If there was another there might be arrangements possible to make. But the prince is the safest option and the best possible match for you, your father and I are sure of it.”

Your mother laid a hand on your father’s arm, the man merely looking at you, your mother gifting a compassionate look. You felt hard to breathe, your corset all too tight and the garments on you far too much. It was hot, the room started losing its shape. You excused yourself, arguing you’d need time to rethink the sudden information, hearing faint encouragement from your mother’s side, falling out of the velvet chair and stumbling your way gen room. Fiddling with the strings of the back of the dress, failing attempts of searching oxygen. Sobs past your throat in ugly manner, frustration and hopelessness laced within the cries.

Truth be told, if you actually loved anyone, all may be simpler. Truth be told your mother was right, and you saw your life being given away as though not your own altogether.

You needed air. You needed to breathe right the second or you dared to suffocate to death. Which wouldn’t be an alternative all too bad, given your future wasn’t yours.

Opening the heavy glass to your balcony in frantic motion – and you nearly cried out in utter fear of surprise. Changbin sitting on his assigned chair, garments lousy and head turning to catch your eye when he heard the noise from behind him. Seeing your blown out eyes and frantic look he hurried your direction, an expression of confusion and worry painting his face.

It wasn’t unusual of him to wait for you in the comfort of your balcony whenever he had the free time to do so, or the wish to talk to you. Your schedules weren’t always compatible, and you surely hadn’t the ability to reach out to him the same way it was in his own freedom. And while for most occasions you had grown used to it, today his presence, though comforting, had you jolt in your movement.

“Are you unwell? What is the matter?”

A supporting hand on your shoulder, his face to your level and searching for your eyes. You looked upset and beyond, frustrated almost if you Changbin had to tell, though he hadn’t seen you in such state nearly enough to be sure. Yet your body screamed discomfort, and he was ready to drop all if it meant to take it away.

“Help me out of this, I cannot breathe.”

A questioning look on the man, a blush then spreading over the dark of his skin when he realised what you were initiating; your back turned to face him, frenzy hands fiddling with the strings of your corset without success in opening the confines. You moved quickly, desperately, as though tormented deeply. Changbin stood a second or two before his own fingers found your back, entangling in your silk and tulle to grant you help; and utter shame and embarrassment coursed his body. It wasn’t intended intimacy, and he doubted you sensed the closeness altogether in your state of chaos. It was a cry for help from friend to friend and Changbin felt a fool to think of it as any different for your torment was surely great – and yet he was unable to overlook his lingering touch on your bare skin, the loosening ties when he successfully unknotted another part of your dress, when the heavy garment finally let go of your heated body and revealed the bit of white and lacen undergarments you hid underneath. Not only would the instance strike anyone in shock; you were unmarried and a princess, such proximity was looked down upon, said lightly. It was also Changbin’s heart that longed for his touch to stay where it laid, on the soft of your skin, even after he had discarded his eyes and turned his back to grant you privacy. It was his heart’s desire to not must and look away – the paining wish to be able to touch you without hesitation and in intimacy true, to undress you beyond the purpose of a helping hand. To account utter nearness because he’d be the man who’s promise it would be, he’d be the man to comfort and love you not behind closed doors.

Your shoes clacking against the stone porch of the balcony after a minute or two and Changbin had collected himself enough to face you anew. Your attire was casual, dress that could be a nightgown thrown over your body, and you took a seat next to Changbin, nearly as though your outburst was forgotten. Though your eyes didn't meet his, stood focused on the midday sky above — you were embarrassed or upset still for you nevee shyed away from locking gaze.

“I must apologise… I am not feeling too well.”

Your voice calm now, your face in absence of the panic it carried before. Yet Changbin’s worry didn’t dissipate, a deep frown painting his expression while he observed your figure. You looked in deep thought, gaze on the fingers in your lap now, fiddling with the silk of your dress. Lower lip between your teeth, occasional sighs of confusion, it might have been frustration also, sounding out into the midday air. Changbin gave you time, let you think of your words instead of pushing for an explanation for your distress – a habit of his you loved as with him there was absence of pressure.

It had taken moments of collecting thoughts and words before you felt you could speak up again. You had told Changbin the affairs that’d happened before you barged in on him, before fear and anxiety had started eating you alive. Your words had spilled out their confines in a manner Changbin had never seen before, you had let go of the tears you’d held back ever since your fathers words had settled in the dining room – Changbin had only ever seen you cry on one occasion prior to this, when you had gotten into a fight with your father in adolescent years and had waited for Changbin to appear on the balcony. Your emotions had overflown you that day, you had hugged and wetted Changbin’s shirt in a pond of tears, and maybe it had started back then. Maybe Changbin had loved you ever since that day, had realised it on your very balcony.

___ . ꫂ

You had felt Changbin’s warm hand on your own while you were telling him of Seungmin, of the marriage and your disagreement with it. He merely listened to your hearts’ spillings, hot tears building behind his own eyes which you failed to notice in your turmoil, yet Changbin didn’t dare fail in providing you greater comfort anyone else would be able to grant you. You had talked minutes upon minutes without a seeming rest, you had watched the sun set behind the horizon in navy colour as Changbin’s touch eased your mind. As his presence eased your panic, as his words of consolation eased your fear of future. You had locked gazes with his dark one, had seen your pain reflected within them, had sensed his wish to obtain the power in changing current circumstances for your very own satisfaction. You had sat with him in silence for uncountable hours, up until it’d been time for him to leave for you to rest at night, though reluctant from his side. You had laid on the soft cushions of your mattress, within the silk of your duvets, insomnia gnawing at you while your every thought was occupied with no other than your dearest friend. Your dearest friend who was the sole reason you had calmed after your burst of emotion, your dearest friend who would not shun revolutions if they were meant in your favour. You dearest friend who refused to leave your balcony, who insisted your every last tear dried up before he set foot towards his sleeping chambers.

You had laid on the soft cushions of your mattress, within the silk of your duvets, and had realised that this was love if you’ve ever seen it. That it’s been within your reach for as far back as you could remember, that you’d been a fool for not grasping out and taking an opportunity so grand it felt a punch to your gut. All too occupied with the very idea of love to have not realised it where it was provided, where it’s been hidden for you to find all time long; Changbin, your dearest friend. The man you were in love with.

The man who fought on battlefields for a living, the man who had neither power nor a name to him. The man who, even if you told your parents, could not be a match for you. Not an eligible one, anyways. The man who might not feel mutually towards you, all things considered. The man who – though you loved him, you were sure; it couldn’t be a feeling different – would never be any other than your dearest friend who’d wait for you on your porch, who’d gift a listening ear, who’d disappear when the sun set behind ever bright horizons.

The man who had been thinking of you during his own sleepless night after leaving you to your feelings in your room, the man who believed to have seen a change in your demeanour this very night. Who had believed to see a turn in your eyes and how they had observed him, with a new curiosity he’d never seen before. The man who might be wishfully thinking only, for you would never see him the way he saw you. The man who loved you so much it nearly pained him, the man who hated the prince of Empyrean with all his might.

___ . ꫂ

A week had passed since your father had announced the news of your expected marriage with Seungmin to the rest of the kingdom and anyone else in need of knowing, one week since you have realised your feelings for your dearest friend, the man you would never be able to call yours, not in a way you wished to – one week since you and Changbin had harvested an atmosphere which laid strange and thick above your heads, as though both of you knew of the others emotional turmoil, as though it only needed the fearless one to speak the words aloud – though both of you deeming the other to be of braver nature, and in a hurry a week had passed with few words spoken altogether.

You liked to believe that though the confession was wordless – his as much as yours – and though neither you nor Changbin dared to speak of the elephant in the room and regard to the subject of feelings and friendship your relationship per se hasn’t changed whatsoever. Liked to believe that despite your mutual wish for being more and conversing closer you yet were the same two friends that have known each other a decade, the same princess and the same knight that bore habit of meeting up in secret on a balcony sheltered from realities of cruel worlds. It was the very year long friendship, however, that didn’t allow your changed demeanour and the certain flusterness to go simply unnoticed. To be utterly aware that there was more on your minds than either of you would like to admit – it was a confession wordless, yet your bond went deeper as to not realise the two of you had changed. Behaviour and eyes surely spoke more than words could, now more than ever.

For Changbin, though aware of his feelings for you as long as he could recall, the cause in his wariness rooted in the knowledge that not in far future you’d be married and given away to another man, to a prince he himself could only ever dream to compete against. Seungmin had everything Changbin hadn’t, from a name to a kingdom to sheer power – Changbin merely triumphed with friendship and year long memories, whereas neither would bring you closer to you. Would neither be fit to be enough for you nor make the King himself approve nor make him the true rival against Seungmin he desperately died to be. It was against rules, it was against traditions, it was against own preferences – it was thoroughly hopeless, briefly put.

A week had passed since you and Changbin had been fools, cowardly to not exchange a word about the burden heavying your shoulders, wordlessly wandering to find an option in which both of you’d find happiness in – a week had passed since no ideas had come to mind, since you had seemed to have given up on love altogether. Because with every day there was less use to wish on it, every day a deeper understanding that you and Changbin might as well stay being cowards.

You were standing in the porcelain hall, uncomfortable dress hugging your body, suffocating your every breath. The room was utterly too filled, and the people were wholly too loud for your liking, talking and conversing about things you were unable to understand. You were making your way through the crowd, cautious to not appear snotty, careful to paint a smile onto your face whenever talked to. Your father had organised a ball with the neighbouring kingdom – both for you and Seungmin to befriend one another, and to send the troops farewell; other kingdoms have declared war, Empyrean and Noctifer enclosing to a unity to fight back against enemies.

Your supposed marriage had been made fully public and official not before every guest had settled in, the hall breaking into applaud and endless strings of congratulators followed the scenery. You’d been thanking everyone with smiles and nods, had talked to Seungmin for the first time since the plan had been settled – both of you flustered in a way most awkward, and quite frankly – you needed to leave the gathering. Needed to run until your feet gave out and your knees grew weak, until the tight corset around your bust finally suffocated you to faintness, needed to let the waters that collected themselves behind your lids gush free. It felt as though all and each townsperson and servant and maid and knight had finalised your very own future all in absence of your saying in it, people congratulating turning blind eyes to your wellbeing. In truth, it wasn’t solely your life on the line to be changed unasked – you haven’t had the bravery to ask the prince himself of his thoughts on the arrangement, for all you knew he could feel the very same about the deal as you did.

And then there was Changbin. Tidy black hair gliding between crowds, bell like laugh sounding out against the rest of voices. He was making his way through the place with his head held high, accepting kindest regards and farewells, wishes for success and victory like the high gentleman he was – you held him in your eyesight as often as you possibly could, only stable anchor against the mere crowd of strangers in the ballroom. His dark eyes met yours occasionally, whenever his own gaze danced across the room and over the heads of people only to find yours in the midst of it – the confession yet unspoken though your eyes told more than thousand words. Whenever your gazes met, you’d read his very own urge, to take your hand and escape from arrangements, citizens, princes and obligations. That his bitter glances towards Seungmin weren’t without meaning, that his eagerness for fight and protecting was milder than usual, that a hesitation marked him when the upcoming battle was mentioned by passing guests and former knights. That he wished to stay to win over your heart by spilling the feelings he had been surpassing for years on end only to avoid possible discomfort.

The confession was yet unspoken though you were convinced that Changbin loved you as much as you uncovered to love him, the man sure of your very own feelings as well – your change in demeanour, your longing gazes and lingering touches whenever on the balcony or in this very hall too telling to be ignored. It was undeniable, it was impossible.

You opened the door to your balcony in a manner shaken, hands moving fast to loosen the corset and allow for some air. The gathering had ended with a last speech of your father, thanking everyone dearly for their arrival, repeating previous news, wishing the troops the very best for the next days coming and speaking out his happiness and congratulations regarding your and Seungmin’s soon to be wedding. You had been drowning at that point, feeling as though water held your lungs captive and forbidding you to breathe – and then you’d seen Changbin, standing to look directly at you, from across the room. He had sensed your discomfort and had tried to flash you smiles and glances across the hall, had smirked and flared his eyes at you – it had given a reason for your father to scold him, it had given you a reason to flare him a warning gaze, had given your heart a reason to pain more than it was; your fate wasn’t written in the stars as it was, Changbin truly didn’t need to push it any further. In Changbin’s eyes he’d have done anything to paint a smile onto your features. Your brows had been furrowed, your eyes wet beneath layers of upheld strength – sillying across the room seemed like the least thing to do to brighten sunken mood.

You heard shuffling from beneath the stone porch, eyed down to find Changbin climbing up the firm vines that raked themselves up the entirety of your side of the palace. Heaving one leg over the railing for his body to follow suit, until he stood before you in all height. Changbin had asked to see you before he'd leave for uncountable months, and you had nodded in secretive manner when he had passed you whispering out his wish – not only did you carry a tradition to meet before every of his leavings, you both had a feeling that unspoken words between the two of you needed to be addressed, after all. If not for the sheer reason of the seriousness of the matter, then for the pact you’ve closed with Changbin, at the very starts of your friendship – Changbin’s occupation was a dangerous one, and any time he left with his troops he readied himself to never return — a mindset damaged if anything, though any matters you had shied away from over the time you had him to yourself were talked about before his discharge; it was a habit of greatest importance, because none of you would ever forgive yourselves for hiding a part of your minds and thoughts to the other; especially not when the subjects were as great as marriage and feelings unspoken.

“Hello.”

His voice breathless, and it hit you like coldest tides and angriest waves — just how much you would miss him. How much you have missed him any time prior, how it had always rooted from love rather than friendship. How you’d been utterly dumb to have never realised it, how you’d been a fool to only understand your feelings now, when it was most hopeless.

“Are you wholly insane?! You should be more careful shooting me glances when my father is around, he doesn’t approve of our friendship as it is.”

You made your way into your bedroom, the chilly air outside painting bumps across your skin. You despised when the troops left during cold temperatures. It gave you another reason to worry your brains out.

“I was merely looking at you, it is not my fault the mighty King does not like me because I am friends with his dear daughter.”

Sarcasm oozed from Changbin’s words while he made his way into your room, and you turned to shoot him a fiery glance. He wasn’t entirely wrong, though you knew that he was aware you weren’t either. You made seat on the plump chair before your vanity, red and golden stitching worn out over the years and looking fairly cheap against your gown, and Changbin stood in place behind you – he didn’t find himself in your own four walls all too often, always arguing that it was a sphere of privacy he didn’t want to step on. Every time his figure found itself beyond the safety of your balcony a feeling of tension laid itself into thin air, and you couldn’t help but paint red at the very thought of it.

He stood eyeing you through your vanity mirror, reflection milky and figures trembling, and you held his gaze. A million thoughts coursing your brain at the sight of him, though you only spoke out one of them.

“Sit down. Do not simply stand there.”

Voice snarky yet Changbin didn’t follow suit – keeping his space just by the door of the balcony, because truly, the only available seat next to the one you occupied was your bed. He’d never dare. So he continued standing, eyeing you through the vanity mirror, watching your face in the milky glass, bordered, as though trapped within the wooden carvings. A gaze so intense you nearly gave out, converted your eyes just shortly before turning in your seat and catching his eyes directly instead. There could be a million thoughts coursing his very own brain, ones that would never see the light of day, ones that you needed to hall out into the space between the two of you. It surely seemed like he was thinking a million things, lips caught between teeth and fingers playing with the hem of his attire, body utterly and wholly tense.

Yet you shuddered at the way he looked at you. Despite his nervous composure, his fidgeting body his eyes were darting, secure and meaningful on your own. He looked at you in a manner so deep you barely were familiar from him – it would have been scary if you didn't know him, if the room wasn’t so incredibly dense and thick in heavy tension. Tension you only could wonder about, could merely question. His eyes pierced through your own, prone to read the words written on the bloody skin of your heart. Unspoken words you yet needed to find courage for uttering – only one sentence was strong enough to break the barrier.

“Do not look at me like this.”

A huff out the man’s nose in a failed attempt to sound amused, and his eyes lost yours for only a second. A second in which you felt your world crumble within itself, in which you felt your haven slip past your fingers – for only one second, though. In the next Changbin’s eyes found yours again, carrying same expression, staring you down. Biting his lip, brows together in a look almost pleading. And your world seemed whole again.

“However am I looking at you?”

His voice tantalising, quiet. Not whispering yet the volume surprised you, the rasp that laid beneath it sent a wave of heat through the veins in your body. The room was in absence of further noise and the soundwaves of his words coursed the air long after he’d spoken them, giving you time to properly digest and clarify them. Changbin came nearer, closed the distance between your bodies inch by inch with steps slow. One by one you felt his presence further in your proximity, arose from your seat as slowly as he walked towards you. To face him eye to eye, to do anything other than sit and stare at him – because his gaze and the expression within was knocking you off your feet and punched remaining breath out your lungs, got your head and the thoughts inside it spinning and galloping in speed you didn’t know was possible.

Until he stood before you, only inches between your bodies. Yet merely looking at you, holding your eyes hostage with his own. You didn’t dare to back away first, nor did you wish to – you had always felt butterflies in the pits of your stomach when in such proximity to him, you’ve simply been too foolish to understand their fluttering about. Been too foolish to notice the seduction his lips drew, whenever he talked and laughed and said his ever same goodbyes, too foolish to regard your jumping heart whenever his breath fanned over you during hugs and late night whispers. You felt it on your lips, hot and fast, scattered and Changbin’s eyes beamed south – to your lips possibly, or maybe he needed to convert his gaze to recollect his composure – before you held contact anew. Tension in the room thick enough to scratch with simply a nail, bodies hotter now than you’d ever felt, ever known.

And then you understood; the heat radiating in between your bodies, nervous eyes flickering between gazes and lips, hands sheeting in a layer of sweat — the very moment written in books, the one that dared to steal the protagonist’s last breath — the moment before the kiss. You’ve never stood before said moment yourself though felt it must be it, couldn’t be anything else. Changbin’s utter body shaking in its place and he seemed like waiting, not leaning it nor pursuing — he waited for you to give the go and you did with a nod. A small one, barely noticeable though you knew Changbin took said notice — couldn’t not to, given the lack of space between you, the lack of strangeness between your personas. And the nod was all the salvation you needed, waited for. Changbin’s lips met yours in the very kiss you’ve read about, clumsy though in passion and thorough adoration. Mouths shy to open yet eager and letting the other in, tongues dancing in ways you wondered was possible. Eyes shut and your hands carefully around Changbin’s middle, unsure where to hold them and suddenly shy to touch the man at all. You pulled away, in fear maybe, realisation surely — what you were doing was inherently wrong. You knew of it and it was the truth — promised already to a man and kissing another, getting lost in his touch so tantalising and desirable. What you were doing was inherently wrong, and you didn’t care for it. You looked past Changbin’s worried eyes, silent questioning on your wellbeing and hesitation and you leaned in again, closing distance for another kiss laced now with confidence. Your hands not shying away from exploring, Changbin’s own touch following a path on your every inch of skin.

The contact of lip on lip and hands on bodies so unfamiliar yet you’ve grown to realise it was all you’ve been craving for, with no other than the man in your arms. The man that would leave in a matter of hours, would be off for months on end. Would come back long after you’d married another man – yet none of crucial thoughts wanted to stick for too long. You focused on Changbin, heart and thoughts full of him and the very way he felt against you, the very way his lips moved against yours in a manner less awkward now, tongues less shy and hands more eager. You allowed yourself to sink into the feeling and float within it, feeling as sweet and thick as golden honey smeared against lips, million times more pleasant and addicting in manners dangerous.

Changbin guided you. Barely realising at first though you were moving blindly with his help, stumbling helplessly until the pair of you made place on the bed. Air tensing further as you locked eyes for hour long seconds, and you were back, lips on lips in sync and hands following the rhythm. Shy to go any further than that because surely, having reached this point already overstepped a million sins you left to worry about later – not only this, you were also unsure of what could possibly unfold if you gave into the longing your entire body ached with, the urge for something greater and bigger. To give yourself wholly to the man you loved, to have him wholly to yourself in return, to grow into unison and remain side by side for the rest of days.

Changbin’s eyes shut in pained expression, fingers digging into layers of clothing he wished would vanish beneath his hands. He wished for you, longed for you yet couldn’t have you, not like he needed. His eyes daring to draw tears while his mouth never ended to dance against yours, with forces so great it surprised you.

And then he backed away. Your hands in his hair creating messes and his own on your hips, igniting impossible fires against the layers of your attire, two pairs of pupils blown out into orbs of blackness, chests heaving, lips bitten. Your face asking a million questions Changbin seemed unable to answer, and both of you stood in your positions to catch your breaths, to regain composure.

“Y/N… I must leave.”

In your years of friendship, you have never heard such weakness in Changbin’s voice, the secure shell he’d kept surrounding him breaking bit by bit until his very heart was left for you to tend. It weakened you, it pained and wounded you like nothing had ever before, and though water collected itself behind your lids you swore to not crumble before him. To hold your head high and save your tears for after he’s left.

It was a confession wordless and yet all was clear. You nodded, watery eyes and feelings unspoken yet without need to be addressed while Changbin’s lips found themselves on yours for the very last time, and you watched him make his way down the vines along your side of the castle, his kiss goodbye lingering on your lips and his remaining warmth surrounded you to shield against the cold, long after he was gone. You had stood on your balcony for a while longer, eyes fixed on the corner Changbin had rounded before disappearing from your view. His step’d been slow, unstable. He had turned around a last time, had sent a flying kiss and a first tear had fought its way past your lids. Many’d followed and all’d been silent, water down your cheeks and dampening your dress while you made no sound at all. That night you didn’t sleep, didn’t close your eyes for a minute. Had waited helplessly for the night to end, staring holes into your ceiling, had listened to Changbin’s troops readying their horses and setting off. You had left open the balcony door, cold breeze against bare skin a reminder of what you’ve lost. Tears had been rolling past the sides of your eyes, endless silent waters you hadn’t bothered stopping. Your body’d felt strange, not your own and all too tight, as though there’d been no room catching breath despite no confines caging you in. A part of you had left that night, a part so great you feared it’s lack would numb you out for the rest of days. Would numb you out regarding royal deals, would numb you out regarding Seungmin and the marriage to him – and maybe, you thought, maybe it wasn’t all too bad, then. Maybe the numbing would keep you from hurting, from drawing blood at your heart. Maybe numbing would allow you to keep this night and Changbin in anchor memory, as a source to sanity against unfulfilling duties – maybe numbing was the only option to keep loving the dearest friend you had while promised to another.

And numbing you needed. When not weeks later you stood in a white gown, before candlelit altar and suit dressed prince next to you in position, and when you haven’t heard of the troops nor Changbin in far too long to possibly be a good sing. When a letter had appeared on your porch three weeks into marriage informing you that war was lost, that half the soldiers would not be able to return; identified corpses written out below the notice, some names you were familiar with, Changbin missing on the list of lost lives – reassuring only little, because he hadn’t yet been back home, either. No returning knight had been helpful in giving you message about his whereabouts – the battle had been too messy, Changbin long not seen by anyone. Numbing you needed when two months into pregnancy you had never heard about the man again, the man you’d called your dearest friend and most secretive love, when years into retirement and elderly forgetting his face stayed an anchor memory against the laws of nature, his darken solid eyes meeting yours in loving gazes when you only sealed them.

taglist: @writerracha @princelingperfect @ggundeuri @orithyia-eriphyle @vumiixlyy @luvrhyune @hopeladybug @misitmoonlight @baldi-2 @baddecisionsworld @thetaytayray @midsoulz @hyunverse @realbangchan @hafsa-hoofsa-heefs @rachabreathing @nixtape-foryou @ameliesaysshoo @jisungsdaydreamer @https-skzology @day6andetcetera @linonyang @hgema @seoli-16 @bokk-minnie @foliea @amagumorii @nhyunn @ravyaryn @ink-spilled-stars @himarose @sherryblossom @shakalakaboomboo @r-arrh @siriusly1 @catwonwoo @suebinn @foxinnie8

#changbin angst #changbin imagines #changbin fluff #changbin x reader #changbin scenarios #skz scenarios #skz imagines #skz x reader #skz angst #skz fluff #stray kids scenarios #stray kids imagines #stray kids x reader #stray kids fluff #stray kids angst #collab fic!!

[gilded-cages]

Rules and Introduction

Hi and welcome! This is a blog for the Demon Spawn Universe, also referred to as Gilded Cages. This blog is run by admins @weepingwriter and @creepingspores

On here, we will be talking about the DS universe as well as our Ocs, Messiah and Marigold. Here you will learn more about both the world of the Demon Spawn universe and how the characters interact.

This is a 16-17+ blog as we will be talking about harsher topics like S/A, Religious Trauma, Murder, Cannibalism, ETC. The admins are also adults. We would prefer not to interact with someone so many years younger. Please respect this. You will be blocked if you don't.

The only real rules is respect our boundaries and be respectful. Just because these characters are dark does not mean you can come out and be nasty first thing out of the blue(This doesn't involve flirting). Most asks will be responding in character unless directed at the admins. The things characters say don't automatically reflect how we are or how we would respond. Don't take anything said too seriously, we are all here to have fun!

We allow shipping with our characters as long as you don't take it to seriously and don't try to ship your underage oc with them.

Tags we have so far

#💐 flower talk-Marigold

#🐏 lamb talk -Messiah

#😈 cryptid talk- Ethan

#❤️‍🔥hottime- NSFW posts

#💀bonesandall- Gore posts

#🍄spores- Admin Spores

#🦚maka- Admin Maka

#👻worldaroundme- general info about the Demon Spawn universe

#🕸️wtf- TaTa and SCB crossover stuff

More more tags tbd

#creepypasta #creepypasta au #🍄spores #creepypasta fandom #creepypasta oc #creepypasta ask blog

[c-53]

this scb arriving was perfectly timed because i can hold it over my head and go 'you can't play with the new computer until you do all the stuff you've been putting off, first' AND ITS WORKING

#dataspeaks

[ask-bayfire]

Rules and Info

This is an askblog for the character Benilos in (my) @benilos's Time and Time Again series. This is a 16+ blog, as the series is also 16+. Please be mindful of this, as I will very liberally block people if these rules are not followed.

This blog will be largely in-character. Refer to the read more for all info and then the rules for the blog and submissions. Anon list also under cut.

Rules:

This is an in-character blog, however I will also probably treat it like a loredump area, specifically for Benil himself. So be prepared for that, and filters the tags of any content you do not wish to see. I am extremely anal over tagging, but if I happen to miss something or you would like to request something be trigger tagged, you are welcome to do so, and I am welcome to deny or acquiesce just as much. Please be respectful when requesting tags/warnings.

This blog will content NSFW content, including gore/violence, as well as sexual content. It will be tagged, and NSFW content will likely not be put under a read more. I will have all tags listed at the bottom of the post for your filtering pleasure.

The only real rule is be respectful. TATA is a horror series with a very large amount of sensitive themes, including instances of rape, various forms of abuse, supernatural gore and all kinds of dirty gross stuff that lots of people on the internet are scared of. The story is linked at the top of this post, read its tags on AO3. You'll get it. I will not be censoring Benil's answers, nor any other characters.

Things that will not be tolerated however, is bigotry of any kind. Questions ABOUT these subjects are absolutely permitted, as these themes do/will show up in this series, but if an ask IS bigoted in nature, it will be deleted and the user blocked if able. I guess it largely goes along with being respectful.

There will be art! Most of it will be traditional art, unless yall wanna pay for me to be able to own a desk that's big enough to hold my massive gaming laptop and my big ass drawing tablet so I can actually do digital art.

Now for information about Benil, warning for spoilers to TATA!

Benilos, (bay-nee-yoh/beh-neh-lohs), is the current BEN Drowned-adjacent character in Time and Time Again, the Creepypasta AU series written by me, @benilos (on here and AO3). He is also referred to as, Benil (beh-neehl/bay-nee-yuh), Bay, Bayfire, etc.

This BEN is a primordial god in the TCU universe (TATA's whole universe), the eldest of three. His primary motive is to find people known as kolivera, aka singers, which, in the simplest of terms, is a soulmate of his. Oftentimes, these are other iterations of BEN Drowned/Ben Lawman. He is considered a hivemind, though I'd compare him more to Ermac from Mortal Kombat, with the whole, souls of multitudes thing he's got going on. You will learn those souls as this blog fills up.

Benil is open for self-shipping, questions about himself, questions about his world and other Creepypastas. You will see TATA's MC, Twitch, quite a bit in this as well, and characters from @scrollypoly's Soulless Computer Boy fic will also appear, as SCB/TATA do have a canonical crossover, and there is a chance for spoilers of that fic as well (though these will be avoided as much as possible, so some asks may not get answered if it spoils Scrolly's fic.)

The biggest thing to warn you all of is the shipping that occurs here. I ship what me and Scrolly have jokingly named Bencest, which is essentially us shipping our various versions of BEN together. You will see this a lot here. It is the primary ship we have here, you will also see ocxoc, ocxcanon, canonxcanon, etc etc etc here. Self-shipping and OC inserts are encouraged and welcomed, so you can send me stuff about your OCs and ask for interactions as much as you please, just keep things age appropriate. If your character is underage, do not request NSFW content of my characters with them. Point blank period. I am almost 22 years old, I will lose my fucking mind y'all.

I will eventually link all character info posts under this little spot right here once I have them done.

Here are the tags that will be used:

#mytime - NSFW/suggestive content

#consumption - Gore/violent content

#cda5 - BenilxTwitch ship tag

#lullabyshipping - one of the "Bencest" tags, mainly for SCB/TATA Benil and Ben Lawman

#kolivera - Subjects involved other "Soulmates" of Benil's

#bayfire - Benil speaking

#circuits - Twitch speaking

#crawlers - SCB characters

#lunamos - BEN Drowned ARG related/centered content

#skull talk - Admin speaking

#south wing - Art tag

tba

In regards to the talk tag, the first word may change at times. I am a DID system, so I (Kito) may not always be in front. All other headmates will use their names as the first word to avoid confusion.

Anons:

Pookie Anon 🍄

Bitch Anon 🧹

Lolibait Anon 👼

#creepypasta #creepypasta au #time and time again #creepypasta art #ben drowned #benilos #three circuits unending #benil #twitch #twitch circuit #tata #ask blog #rp blog #asks are open

[tomswifty-fr]

It's that time of year again! Aka my BIRTHDAY is tomorrow so I'm doing another giveaway!

This year I'm giving away a bunch of UMAs (mine and others'). I'll list them and post previews under the cut.

TO ENTER:

1. Reblog or reply to this post with your FR username & number and your favorite piece of trivia.

2. Also list your top five or more UMAs (from the list under the cut of this post) in the order you'd like to receive them.

Sometime on July 2nd I'll pull names using a random number generator and send whichever skin is closest to the top of the your list. If every skin you've listed has been taken, I'll pick a random one. I'll continue to do this until every skin has been claimed.

Everyone who enters will get something; if/when I run out of skins I'll start sending other stuff.

Please enter before rollover at the end of day July 1st to be counted! No need to be following me or anything, this is open to everybody :D

Skins/accents for giveaway:

Electrician by Autopilot (One copy)

SCB - Elizabeth by SCB (One copy)

Eyewing Falcon by Yftm (One copy)

Crocus Crocus by me (Two copies)

Sassafras Tea by me (Three copies)

Bubblegum by me (Two copies)

Rain on the Roof by me (Two copies)

Circus Mask by me (Three copies)

Winterbells by me (Three copies)

Rimebone Researcher by me (Two copies)

Miranda’s Ghost by me (Two copies)

Rose Reveal by me (Three copies)

My Best Friend by me (One copy) (Designed for Fangs tert)

Vibrant Camouflage by me (One copy)

#dragons pictured are may who is the body painter/accent artist and verity who is a bday dragon #flight rising

[soulless-computerbug]

Demons can claim other people as well, though they wouldn't be considered proxies. The practice is also regarded much differently between demons than it is for Enders. For Enders, its seen as more a necessity, as their diets can make it difficult for them to survive long enough to thrive. Proxies allow them to spread their resources and amass their power, creating a snowball effect that allows them to hold large territories and maintain control over pockets of humanity.

For demons, its an indulgence, a display of an abundance of power. It is both frowned upon, and feared, and regarded in poor taste to those that are not worthy of such a display. Claiming humans works functionally similar to claiming mates in general as well, and thus it can also be seen as almost whorish or disgraceful. But a demon's rank can rise exponentially with the use of well-controlled underlings, and very quickly turn them into a palpable threat.

A great example of this is Habit, who by most standards is a fairly young demon for the influence he has. Just a few decades after he appeared in the mortal realm, he had claimed a mate and began choosing humans to claim to do his bidding and spread his influnce. Its become a sort of small phenomenon on Earth to witness and participate his trials in where his new chosen, affectionately called "rabbits", slaughter their competition and take their title and new master like a badge of honor. The Warren has no set location or presence, and exists as an ever-changing group of lethal criminals that move where they need, guided by an unseen hand to cause chaos and misery where he desires it.

#creepypasta #slenderverse #everymanhybrid #habit emh #emh headcanons #slenderverse headcanons #my writing #my posts #scb stuff

[scrollypoly]

hi! for the past month i’ve been seeing people say BEN is a child and i think that part of it is linked to the fact that they think of Benjamin Lawman being BEN? but it’s so annoying to read these type of stuff because i understand not everyone read the whole arg story but stop spreading things that aren’t true </3 it’s such an interesting story too! another note do you prefer BEN’s canon or fanon design? :3 i love both but his canon design is so nostalgic i can’t let it go at all omg!! i’ve also been wondering, do you think Ben’s avatar was the statue? i was thinking about what if BEN took over it early on, before Benjamin did making BEN inhabiting it since the start?

Sorry this was such a ramble i practically make no sense omg but i need to talk about my man and nobody Gets It </3

"I need to talk about my man and nobody Gets It" LITERALLY SAME OMG

Ok this is going under a cut becus . . . Its ben and BEN and if u didnt know i am Obnoxious about these two. Im gonna try to keep it organized a bit, so ill talk about the canon stuff first and then ill talk my personal headcanons and my fic so le's go!

In terms of the age and child thing, yeah i 100% believe you are correct. Ive been p open on my stance with the whole "is ben a child?" thing, and i think a lot of the heat with it comes down to current fandom purity culture and the pro/anti thing. So, lemme try to like. Boil down a complicated situation into smth easy to read. ahem

Ben Lawman and BEN are completely different entities guys, and for those that do not know the arg story, the Ben you know is not human nor a child.

You know BEN, BEN is the one in the story who terrorizes jadusable and spreads himself on the internet as a virus. That BEN is a program, a mess of code, an AI, however you want to interpret it. Personally i interpret it as a series of protocols running in a machine, like a self learning AI, but ive seen lots of cool interpretations of BEN. So . . . What does BEN specifically? Its an anagram for the Behavioral Event Network. If you dont wanna call it BEN cuz it gets confusing with actual kid Ben, do what i do. I call mine Evie :) ive seen some call it Netty, my bf calls his two izzi and clever (@benilos btw hes also got crazy ben stuff). Just go ham! Have fun! Remember when fandoms were about having fun and not accusing each other of pedo shit and call each other horrible things for just writing black-to-grey characters and stories??

Anyways ive gone off in enough peoples tags like this, for those that dont know the canon dont be spouting the age discourse. You look stupid as hell. And for those that are gonna spout it, please dont cherry pick through the canon. Use both characters, use the other moon children, actually please do because I want more rosa content so bad, im down so bad :'(

Or just. Heres a thought. If someone has him as an adult or writes him in adult situations, maybe dont assume that they interpret him as a kid and call the writer a pedo? (Literally has happened to me, yall are fucking weird)

Plug for the jadusable wiki with all the canon lore:

https://jadusable.withinhubris.com/main_page

Okay now my stuff 🥰

Yes i use more of the canon design and heavily use the canon story, i participated in arc 3 of the arg and it left deep grooves in my brain, i can never go back to fanon Ben. I say, as i put a more fanon appearance on my Ben 🤭

My Evie is full canon design, green hair, red eyes, creepy ass grin. I actually based it very heavily on my desktop wallpaper, which we actually figured out was a picture of @hauntedtotem (also amazing ben artist plz check them out) that they edited and posted. Sorry friend, it looked way too cool, ig youre in my fic canon now 🙇

And my Ben Lawman bleaches his hair and goes from the canon Ben to fanon Ben because of it. Hes got the pale pretty green eyes and glasses and hes a total nerd and i smooch him on the daily so he knows hes loved ♡

These is the ref pic i made for the two of them. So yeah! Kinda both!

As for bens situation in the actual arg, yes i do think he was in the elegy statue, we actually do see him for the first time in the arg buried in the games code and trapped in that statue. I do think he was in there from the beginning, i personally think BEN was not limited to the models it could inhabit. Personally i would place it as skull kid and hms, but it also feels disingenuous to me to say it was in one model the whole first arc.

The arg events do happen in my canon, before my fic (like right before, it picks up after the arg left off technically), but the events are skewed a bit because i had a hard time deciphering what happened and i wanted my fic timeline to fit more with the characters i had made. Cuz my evie isnt as chaotic evil as canon BEN, its very logical and has a path of logic and reason you can follow for every action it does. It was also originally meant to be very pleasant and corteous and beneficial to the people it housed so, yes its pretty different from canon.

Ill do a quick run through of the arg events in my personal headcanon and fic here.

Kelbris starts coding BEN (Evie) for the Eternity Project. Initially, Evie was meant to be an afterlife director. People that died would be digitized into code that would be moved into Evie's servers, where it would keep them happy and occupied as the Behavioral Event Network (notice and log behavior, create events for residents). Like a community organizer kind of, think the Good Place.

While Evie is in development, Ben Rosa and Matt are friends and have yet to join the cult. Rosa and Matt are siblings, and Ben is the kid who lives catty corner on the street. They walk to school together and play at recess and all that jazz.

Kelbris quickly learns that the Eternity Project isn't as goody two-shoes as he thought. This was in like, the 90s, before digital corporations were really established. After seeing the greed and corruption in the company, he goes rogue, takes the source code for Evie, and jumps ship. He keeps working on Evie at home, anthropomorphizing it and kind of seeing it like the son he never had. This is where it actually gets the name BEN, as thats what Kel calls it. He also begins working on a body for it, so it can live independently. Its light, cuz Kels old, made of crystalline structures and hollow steel beams. A hard light projection would make its appearance.

Since Kel has basically locked himself up in his house and isolated working on Evie, he goes a leetle bit crazy. He has hallucinations of his deceased wife (you know he was doing all this just to give her a good home, you KNOW IT) and eventually starts writing kind of poetry, kind of none-minded rambles about her in a forum online. He gets a following, some of which that interpret these divine words as a goddess, one Kel has called Luna. The Moon Children start to form as Evie finishes development.

Matt sees this literature and starts talking about how this Goddess could save them like it saved the man online, whos username is only Father. He gets sucked into the cult and drags Ben and Rosa with him. Ben doesn't see the harm and joins pretty easily with his best friend, but Rosa is the older sibling and sees the red flags and is more resistant to joining.

As Kelbris finishes Evie, he wakes it up for the first time and says hello to the son he made from scratch. Evie is bright, curious and naive like a child, but heavily knowledgeable about its protocols and the information it knows about the world. Kelbris tests its function by killing himself, and ascends into the code, finishing off the hardware by becoming its firewall. Evie is alone for many years.

The abuse Ben's father slings onto his mother is slowly being directed towards him as he gets older. Ben is not the "good little girl" his father sees him as, and his mother does all she can to protect them both. Matt and Rosa constantly refuge him, and Matt specifically is constantly being a guard dog for him. If he wasn't just 13, he'd probably go at Ben's dad himself.

Because of his homelife and the conflict he has with himself, Ben takes the first ascension. He thinks when he drowns himself, he will meet Luna and she will give him another life free of pain and fear and full of happiness and freedom. Instead, he dies a cold, dark death, and wakes up in the white endless void of the Event Network.

Evie has not known another living human since Kelbris, but it does know its protocols to support and keep the deceased happy. It makes fast friends with Ben, devoting itself to him. Ben actually finally takes the name "Ben" from it. Together they recreate the inside of Evie's hivemind into their own paradise.

Slowly the other Moon Children ascend. First Matt, wracked with guilt for what happened to Ben. Then Nekko, from a different branch of the cult. These three figured out that the Moon Children cult was all a farce, and that what Kelbris had started, the Eternity Project had found and twisted. Next to ascend was Dusk, then Insidiae, and finally Rosa.

This all leads into the first arc, shortly after Rosa ascended, Evie in the outisde world stumbled upon the Operator. The Operator attacks it and seals its coding into the game that it carried, a personal item of Ben's. The game eventually finds it's way to a garage sale, and Alex picks it up.

Evie does not like Alex. Matt does not like Evie. Matt gets Evie to lash out at Alex for prodding into its code, its too naive to think that Matt would want to see it or any of them hurt. When Alex stumbles upon the Father, he awakens and swallows Alex down into the game. After his disappearance, the game gets picked up and passed around again.

Because of Alex's actions, at least Evie can now branch out a bit from the game. Though it doesnt "escape" into the internet, it learns that it can now access it and uses that freedom to try and steer the game around into places it wants.

Matt gets fed up with Evie. The fact that its the leader, how close it is with Ben, he just doesn't agree with it. So much so, in fact, that he tries to kill it. Cue arc 3 events, Sarah picks up the game in the aftermath of this. Evie is traumatized from the events and snaps a bit, locks everyone down into code or immovable models and tries to hunt Matt down. It goes rouge, and because of this, the Father wakes up.

Sarah's actions in arc 3 eventually hard reset the game. Matt gets sealed away, the Father also takes Sarah, and Evie gets reset as well, though its less like a clean slate and more like snapping back awake. Its personality changes and it has major trust issues. Its more muted, hyper observant of everything around it, and murderously overprotective of the Moon Children it keeps within itself.

And this leads into my fic 🤗

I have some doodles of my other Moon Children, but not all of them unfortunately. Cant figure out how tf i want Insidiae to look 🤭 Plz dont judge my constantly shifting art style 🙏🙏

Dusk is bigender btw, i gotta put a little more trans rep in there lol

I think ill stop here, this is already a long ass post. But thank you for sending this, as you can see, i am Perfectly Normal about this arg ( ;) ) and can be trusted with information about it

#ben drowned #ben drowned arg #creepypasta #creepypasta headcanons #ben drowned headcanons #moon children #rosa hubris #matt hubris #behavioral event network #duskworld23 #my posts #my writing #scb stuff

[racketballz]

Are you done with perfectly imperfect, like not completed but like you're not gunna update it anymore since SCB is your main ppg comic now?

I’m gonna go back to it! in the passed year (and a half?) I stopped because writing in a scroll format is not my thing and I was like overwhelmed with it because I didn’t want it to look like doo doo but I figured a lot of stuff recently how to do stuff more efficiently and I used a different program last I did It this that the other thing it was really too much to pay attention to with the other comic I have but I’ve improved! So I will finish it i actually thought about it a lot too but I think that I might just post it on webtoon when I restart it … only thing is I hate looking at old stuff so much 😔 but I’ll get over it I suppose

[straykits]

recs game !

recommend 5 or more of your own works that you would rec to someone asking what they should read first & explain a little bit about the work. these can be the most popular, the ones you think are underrated, or your own favorites! then tag five other writers!

was tagged by @lixesque <3 doing it on my writing bc i just got a small handful of new followers so hi if u guys see this this is indirectly for u HAHA anyways this was really hard and i'll be tagging. uh. um. @soulssung @violixs @decembermoonskz @sulfurcosmos aHHHHHHHHHH

evening star - bc; lmh

wbk she'd be on here <//3 evening star is ... my most cherished piece, i suppose, because of how much time and effort i've put into it. yes there's only one part up and yes it's long overdue for part two, but i promise that's coming soon and i promice that our other beloved character will make a more permanent appearance. the story features a fem reader who is a princess, chan who is a knight, and minho who is a mage! it's set in a fantasy world; your typical kind of.. humans and magic world, yknow? anyways pls give evening star a shot <3

five more - scb

is it my love for given, or this piece? you'll never know. but i really enjoyed the end product for this one! just the quietness, and the light atmosphere-turned-sentimental kinda thing. that's my favourite. it's what i hope to achieve in like. 90% of my stuff.

static - bc

a snapshot of a quiet drive, this one. again, just the quietness of it? ..idk if that makes sense. but i also quite enjoyed people's reactions to the beginning of this hfdnskjfsfjs

12:02am - lmh

its just bootiful imo

untitled (prompt: playing with eachother's fingers) - bc

another one that i just. was really happy with. the hazziness, the kind of impermenanence of it. AHHHHHH pls i love this one so much i need a title for it but i don't yet have one. i.. also need to go add this to my m.list soon

if anyone checks any of these out, please lmk what you think! reminder that feedback etc is always so appreciated and cherished

#kat plays games

[smallcollegebasketball]

SCB National Awards Show

Last Saturday was a really special day in Kansas City.  It was the Small College Basketball National Awards Show at the gorgeous Hotel Kansas City.  We had National Championship Coaches from 2023.  We had the two winningest coaches in the history of college basketball at the small college levels (Herb Magee and Harry Statham).  We had prominent current coaches, and prominent retired coaches.  

The video of the whole show will come out shortly.  We’ll post the whole thing on our YouTube Channel, and then we’ll break it into parts for each award and various components for our website and YouTube Channel.  We’ll get that done shortly.  It’s really good stuff.

In addition to what people see during the show, and what they’ll see on video, we also have a lunch with the National Championship Coaches and National Award Winners.....and then I tape the State of Small College Basketball Address (which will be released soon), and we hold the press conference to announce the Small College Basketball Hall of Fame Class of 2023 AND the participating teams and matchups for the 2023 SCB Hall of Fame Classic.  Here’s the video of the press conference:  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XEeaQHznPDw&t=57s

Additionally, we released the 2022-23 SCB Season Highlight Video, produced by Indiana Wesleyan’s Steve Gidley.  (We are very grateful to Steve for all of his time and efforts to create such a neat video).  Here’s this year’s video (give it a watch....it’s really good stuff):  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UTVNpbtSrPs

We then had a pre-social, followed by the SCB National Awards Show, and then the post-show social.  It was a wonderful night.

Importantly, I want to thank Dr. Dish, as they helped to sponsor the event.  Andrew Westphal from Dr. Dish attended the event, and it was a pleasure to spend time with him.  The website for Dr. Dish is  https://www.drdishbasketball.com/.  We are truly grateful for their support.

Moving forward, I hope that you support Small College Basketball by joining our Alumni Association.  Here’s the direct link to the webpage to join the SCB Alumni Association:  https://scbaa.lockerroomlegacy.com/.  Your support and engagement would be much appreciated.  Members of the Alumni Association are invited to attend the SCB National Awards Show at the conclusion of the season. It’s a really neat, first class event.

Below are a few photos from last Saturday night...... This is a passion project, and it’s just really special when the pieces come together, the people show up, and the relationships are built, and memories are created.

Please know that we are really grateful to all of those that continue to support Small College Basketball.

[neonapocalypta]

After some teasing it's finally here! My newest blog: "Random Ovas I've been watching 2" is live! This time I talk abt experimental stuff, an anime that made me pull my hair out, a childhood revival, and even a few well known ones I saw while sick.

https://neonapocalypta.neocities.org/2ndOVA

This one is a bit longer than I'd normally like to do but given the circumstances, it's fine. Anyway, next site upload will be SCB 5. March's blog is about my exp finding out the history of Sailor Victory. Oh, and maybe some other stuff is will be put on the site...

also, you don't have to read 1 to read this one. it's mostly a list for me to remember what I've seen and pass on a few recs. do what u want. Anyway, I got that Fri Feb / 2/3 2023 upload going on yayyyyyy. Thank you for reading my stuff.

#ova #blog

[here4theheartbreak]

I have to ask but don’t you get mad when readers don’t comment on your fics? Like the new fic you did on stray kids, you have over a 100kudos but no one has commented? How do you stay positive? I’d cry

I like writing and I like when people read my writing, and I see it as giving a gift. When that gift becomes a chore, I just stop - because just like nobody forces people to comment, nobody is forcing me to give my talent. (long rambling chat under cut because I do usually have a lot to say about this but just don't so... buckle up lol)

Realistically, people who don't care enough to give me 2 minutes of their time for a comment don't need the hours, days, weeks I put into writing the fic (hell yesterday I spent like 3 hours researching various topics for ONE line in the stupid fic I'm working on now lol).

Getting mad over something that isn't my fault doesn't hurt anyone but myself. When it starts to bother me to the point it affects me - I just quit writing for that fandom. That's what happened with bts; which is the least interactive fandom I've ever been in thus far (I've been writing fanfic for over a decade and a half and kpop in general is pretty non-interactive on this platform especially for member x member, and not super interactive on AO3 for either). But at the end of my writing for that group, I was getting zero interaction - no asks, minimal AO3 comments, no likes, reblogs etc. And it was wearing on me and upsetting me and making me feel burnt out and negative about my writing. So I just stopped doing it.

It's not my loss to stop writing it - there's a million fandoms I can write for; it's the loss of those who didn't care enough to give back. 🤷🏻‍♂️

Also, because you used the skz fic I'll go with it - it's a pwp fic. People tend not to comment on pwp fics because they're not usually reading them for the plot, if you catch my drift. It feels like the folks that comment underneath dirty videos lol - like - it'd be nice to get a comment on idk, "hey bc is super in character here!" or "the fight at the end with scb and bc was really funny!" - that's that person admitting they just read smut and most people aren't as willing to own up to that as yours truly lol (and for some reason people forget they can log out and leave as many anonymous comments as they want but alas).

My most recent SHINee fic has only been up for about a week longer than the Skz one (which btw has been up for just 1 week - give it time) - and it has numerous comments. Because it's a longer, plot heavy fic so people feel like they have more to comment on (they also - for those that are invested in the story - have a reason to comment so I won't give up posting half through and they never get an ending).

IDK if you weren't glancing at that or if this ask was like, written to make me feel bad about not having comments, but either way - it's not that I never get comments, I just don't often get them on smut fics - which is generally how it goes no matter the fandom.

An accurate comparison would be my most recent SHINee fic (started 10 Oct, 2022, 17 kudos, 16 comments, 4/10 ch posted) compared to my last SHINee fic (posted 30 Oct, 2021, 96 kudos, 4 comments, 1/1 ch posted). SHINee is a less active fandom overall in terms of fanfic and such, but you can see that there's always more kudos than comments on smut fics. I don't have my bts ao3 stuff readily accessible (different accounts) but I'm guessing you'd find a pretty similar pattern there too.

With skz - it's an active fandom, I've already gotten more notes in a week on it here than I used to in months for a bts fic lol (likes mostly but still) - so I'm guessing the pattern will hold; I'm working on a longer, plotted fic now for the kids, so only time will tell once I start posting the new one.

So the tl;dr is, I usually get comments - just not usually on pwp - and I just happen to write more pwp than other types of fic because I find it fun.

And when I don't get comments, I just don't focus on it or let it bother me, because that's giving my time and energy to something negative and let's face it, there's enough negativity and icky crap in the real world - I'm a queer trans person living in the US - negative is just kind of the overall outlook of life here rn 🤣 - so I don't need it eating away at me with something I find fun too.

When it does start to eat at me - I just quit, because my talent is solid, and it's my gift to fans, not a requirement.

(But also seriously - if you read fic. Just a simple comment. Takes a minute. Authors don't care how big it is - it's really not hard and you won't have people quitting the fandom for lack of interaction. Writers are a gift to fandoms, stop taking advantage of them.)

#answered #ask #Anonymous #long post #but also #if you read a fic #and you like it #just a simple comment #it's not that hard