Wyatt couldn’t sleep. He’d tried his best to play it cool with Brynn and failed spectacularly, the past week having been a rare highlight in his otherwise deplorable life.
But happiness was a foreign and elusive concept, one that caused uneasiness instead of contentment. It didn’t feel right, like he hadn’t earned it, like he didn’t deserve it. How could such a wonderful feeling create such a twisted knot in the pit of your stomach?
Usually, when Wyatt slept with a woman, he didn’t feel much of anything; he’d make himself scarce the next morning, or drive them away on purpose for his own entertainment-.. and yet, with his nose nestled in her hair as she slept, he realised he didn’t want Brynn to go home.
He actually enjoyed spending time with her. She wasn’t annoying or high-maintenance, boring or stupid, and she didn’t expect anything from him, nor he her. It was terrifyingly easy.
Wyatt had never been in love before; hadn’t even come close. Not once could he remember having loved anyone or anything, familial, platonic, nor romantic-.. not properly, anyway. Not without condition, doubt, or backlash; but for some inexplicable reason, Brynn had captivated him completely.
She was soft and compassionate yet rugged and unruly, so tenacious – albeit somewhat assumedly – that he couldn’t help but admire her. She was beautiful too, and Wyatt didn’t throw that word around lightly. Hot? Sure. Gorgeous, pretty, sexy? Sure. But never beautiful. That was reserved for more; someone unique, someone he didn’t want to let go, someone he didn’t want anyone else to touch…
No, he definitely didn’t want Brynn to leave at all.
But leaving she was, and Wyatt had no choice in the matter. If she wanted to stay, she would. If not, he could only hope that she’d return one day… He’d thought about asking her not to go, but he didn’t want to beg. His father had always instilled in him not to beg for anything in life, it was demeaning and pathetic.
He’d also said you ought to take what you want by force, but Wyatt was choosing to ignore that part. It wouldn’t feel the same unless she chose for herself.
Whether he wanted to admit it or not, Wyatt was a little worried. He’d tried to ask Brynn about her life back in San Myshuno more than a few times, but she clearly didn’t want to talk about it, expertly shrugging him off every time he broached the subject. He couldn’t tell if she was nervous, ashamed, or if she truly believed it wasn’t worth talking about.
She was so good at hiding certain things that it was damned near driving him insane, and despite their rapidly growing intimacy, he wasn’t much closer to figuring out what was going on.
He couldn’t exactly keep an eye on her either, not from here-.. besides, he’d told himself that following people probably wasn’t the best idea, even if he didn’t necessarily think it was a big deal.
Wyatt sighed deeply; his head pounding. Why had he let her get under his skin? Why didn’t she want to stay? What the hell did she have in San My that she wouldn’t have here? Who the fuck did Gael even think he was? The pathetic fuckwad. She clearly didn’t like the guy all that much, why would she rather leave with him?
Unless-.. what if Brynn meant more to Wyatt than he to her? He doubted she was that good an actor, but he’d found it rather difficult to think straight recently.
Sweating at the thought, Wyatt realised he might have to be a little more honest if he wanted some answers…
Shit.
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y’all who TF is the screamy dude at the top just underneath the scroll rungs? Why were they important enough to include? Who is this? Like everyone else has significance and meaning because they like, y’know, show up in the show. but who is this random ass motherfucker that we’ve never seen? What? I’m so confused, were they just trying to fill space?
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Expanding on the Knowledge element thing.
Knowledge is the element of knowing, discovery, perception and learning which also involves memory, something that Cellbit lacks due to amnesia. Which I think its neat but here we go:
"To know everything is to lose everything"
The central part of the Horror of this element can be taken from this phrase. In knowing/discovering something that you shouldnt, a thing so horrible that changes who you are, what you are, your perception of reality will never be same for the worst.
Compared to the others Elements, Knowledge doesnt seem that bad at first. After all learning things cant be wrong right? But once tied to this Element people cannot stop, they must have the answer, the reason, the how's and when's. Even If the costs is too high. Once they started asking, they cannot stop.
Which I think that we all see clearly on Cellbit attempts to learn more the Federation. But the kick is that Cellbit has already lost "everything" once with the amnesia/memory wipe that the Federation did. The question is, what did he learn that the price was so high? ( of course this is expeculation based on Knowledge element themes)
Another folly of the Knowledge is that things must make sense. Knowledge supress the Chaos of Energy and put things in order. One of the things we learned into the late seasons of Ordem is that Knowledge needs to put logic into things, even If the end result is for the worse. Things don't just happen, that IS the Energy gimmick. There's must be a pattern that can be deciphered, a bigger puzzle with scattered pieces.
Which leads us to the third part of the Knowledge Element: Balance. For all actions there must be a consequence, for every problem a solution, to the results you want to obtain there's a cost. So all people who try to solve things with Knowledge, just end up creating either a different problem to others or a even worse outcome.
Okay sorry for the long ramble on the Knowledge, I hope it casted some light on It.
Ohhhh that makes sense. Very dark academia, I can fuck with that
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