#poison ivy x harley quinn | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

witchthewriter · 2 years

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𝐁𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐧 𝐚 𝐩𝐨𝐥𝐲 𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐏𝐨𝐢𝐬𝐨𝐧 𝐈𝐯𝐲 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐇𝐚𝐫𝐥𝐞𝐲 𝐐𝐮𝐢𝐧𝐧 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐥𝐮𝐝𝐞

⤷ female, ambiguous race, and any size reader. Requests are open, thank you for reading!

ᴹᵃˢᵗᵉʳˡᶤˢᵗ

𝑺𝑭𝑾🌿

⭑ A lot of dance parties with Harley, and you have to pull Ivy into joining

⭑ Harley really likes ABBA, and you three often watch the Mamma Mia movies

⭑ You all live together, with all separate rooms (so a person can escape whenever they wanted to)

⭑ The place is full of plants, just absolutely hundreds of them; dangling from the ceiling, on window sills, in the bathroom, etc.

⭑ You have a collection of books and Harley will bring you back at least 3 whenever she goes out

⭑ Ivy is actually super ticklish and whenever she’s upset at what Harley’s done, Harley will chase her around the apartment, trying to get Ivy to forgive her

⭑ Ivy is always chastising Harley for deliberately getting the lyrics wrong in a song. She does it just to piss her off

⭑ Harley initially thought you and Ivy talking to the plants was stupid, but whenever she thinks she’s alone, you can hear her having full blown conversations with (to) them

⭑ Harley gets upset if she falls asleep on the couch and you guys go to bed. So now you have to carry her to bed. She usually sleeps in the middle while you guys cuddle up next to her

⭑ Ivy beomes really out-going/funny when she’s had a few drinks. And it’s a common occurance for her to break out on song. But she’ll deny it in the morning.

⭑ Um you guys definitely keep news paper articles about your shenanigans ... okay maybe they shouldn’t be called shenanigans, more like crimes ...

⭑ Your periods are definitely synched up, but Ivy has plants that can alleviate the cramps. And in the bathroom, there’s an array of pads, tampons, diva cups, re-usable pads etc., (obviously you know who owns which when it comes to reusable ones)

⭑ Whenever you’re making a promise you and Harley do the pinky thing, but if they’re even bigger promises - or even bets, then you do a spit shake.

⭑ Ivy thinks it’s absolutely disgusting, but she gets so used to it that she joins in too

⭑ Being each other’s best friends

⭑ Having Selina over for dinner

⭑ And you guys probably have super obscure pets - like yes, Harley would most definitely have her hyena named Bruce, and Ivy made a living Venus Fly Trap, like one that seems almost sentient and you just want a goddamn dog, or even a cat. But they refuse, and you point out their pets -

⭑ So then they agree

⭑ But you can’t decide what to get

⭑ And maybe one time when Selina is over for dinner, she says that she found a stray that doesn’t like being around too many other cats, so you say you’ll take him

⭑ But then you realise a few months later that the reason why the cat didn’t like being around other cats was because it wasn’t a he, but a she THAT IS NOW PREGNANT

⭑ “Awww we’re gonna be grandparents!” Harley cooed when you guys figured it out

⭑ “Well we can’t have all of them, and Selina already has an apartment full.” Ivy stated, but you wanted to keep all of them so desperately.

⭑ Your cat still hasn’t given birth yet, but she’s so big that all she can do is lay down all-day. You can find her on your bed, snoozing in the sunlight.

⭑ And she actually really likes Bruce (the hyena)

⭑ Harley particularly likes to sit on your lap, and Ivy likes to rest her head on your shoulder

⭑ You usually make dinner

⭑ Ivy cleans up

⭑ Harley will go and get the groceries

⭑ Sometimes you do all sleep in the same bed, but the majority of each of your belongings are in your separate rooms

⭑ Harley will leave lipstick marks on your cheek

⭑ And you’ll find red/orange hair in the bathroom, but you can’t deny that you love these women.

⭑ Theme Song:

‘Lay All Your Love On Me’ by Pale Honey

⭑ Relationship Tropes:

✧ Touch Either Of My Girlfriends And You Die x3

✧ Dumbass (Harley) x Dumbass In Training (You) x Oh God I Guess They’re My Dumbasses (Ivy)

✧ Moon (Ivy) x Eclipse (Harley) x Sun (You)

#harley quinn #dating harley quinn would include #harleen quinzel #harley quinn x you #harley quinn x reader #poison ivy #poison ivy headcanons #poison ivy x reader #poison ivy x you #dating poison ivy would include #poison ivy x harley quinn #harley quinn x y/n #harley quinn x reader x ivy #ivy x harley #ivy x harley x reader

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apocalypse-shuffle · 7 months

Text

GOTHAM CITY SIRENS (generalized canon)

────────────────────

"Harley-napping" (Harley Quinn × Poison Ivy x Selina Kyle × Fem!Reader)

I Stealing Harley from the Squad and then having a fun night out.

| SFW, mature language, action, criminal acts (duh), -platonic!reader/though there's hints of something more or a past relationship with Cat

I You're a thief, demolitions expert, and have EOD training in this one. Pictures used are just for aesthetics and have no contextual meaning to the story. (pic source - Batman: Arkham City video game)

| +words

| part: two of two (part one)

“C’mon Croc, we’re all friends here.”

You walk away from your opponent, skidding around the hulking mass in front of you whenever he gets too close. God, you hated Killer Croc.

He growls.

“I’m not in the mood for your shit tonight, girl, and neither is Waller.”

You tip your head back and laugh.

“Is that so, buddy?” You step onto the raised edge of the embassy building the Squad had been deployed in. Was this ugly motherfucker serious?

You watch Killer Croc’s eyes narrow as he takes a step forward with yet another growl. You shake your head, shaking off the way the sound sends shockwaves into the air, and tutt in disagreement.

“Uh uh. If you want me you’ll have to work for it.” You smirk, spreading your arms wide, “Catch me if you can.”

You wave a little and then tip off the ledge of the building. Falling.

As the wind from your descent whips around you wildly, you whoop loudly. Tilting your upper body upwards you go to grasp at the grappling gun attached to your hip and fire—

You’re jerked roughly to a stop, breath punching out of you, equilibrium disrupted, and stomach the wrong side of queasy.

The jolt in your descent makes you give a breathy yell in surprise and the comparatively mild knock of your head on the side of the building shocks you into silence.

‘The fuck?’ Your mind supplies and you groan.

It takes you a while, your brain taking a few moments to wrap around your new position and the distinct lack of anything in your hand, before you force your head up. Slitted eyes meet squinted brown and your gut clenches.

Copperhead. What kind of fucking circus was Waller running here?

“You have,” you close your eyes and gasp, “Got to be kidding.”

Selina Them were so making this night up to you later.

“What fun is there in jokes when I could be killing you instead?” His tail tightens around your middle from where he’s dangling you in the air, hanging halfway outside an upper floor window himself, and you wheeze. “This spoil is ours.”

The hissed sentence makes you want to tense up but - even lightheaded - your training kicks in and dictates you do the opposite. Relaxing proves to be the correct move too because Copperhead gives an incredibly startled look at the drop in your weight. Thankfully the lapse is immediately exploited by one of the vines resting on the side of the building coming to life and striking out to wrap around his throat.

He’s too shocked to coil back around you but that also means that when his tail goes lax you drop from it.

And here you were without your grappling gun. You can even see where it is, gun dangling from the line and hook stuck in the stone structure of the building.

Two - maybe three - seconds of stomach dropping airtime is what you’re bestowed with before you land into something soft and vaguely organic smelling. Your breath hasn’t even fully caught up with you when the thing closes around you and you’re being lowered to the ground at a much more respectable pace.

It’s not till you touch gravel and the thing unfurls that you fully register what it is—a flower.

“Okay,” you gasp, nodding to yourself. A humongous flower rescuing you from impending death was by far not the weirdest thing you’d seen in Gotham - and to be expected considering current company.

Tenderly brushing your hands over the petal closest in gratitude and then pushing yourself out of the vibrant flower takes more effort than it should. Having to repeatedly remind yourself to take deep breaths dulls the hell outta your reaction time it would seem.

Your breath stutters, body harshly trying to regulate itself, but you wave off the green hand being held out to you. When Ivy even got so close you’ve no idea.

When your knees buckle Ivy disregards the dismissal entirely, not even hesitating for a second before grabbing you. Steady hands wrap around your middle, pulling you closer to her, and your own hands snap up to grasp at her forearms.

Ivy clicks her tongue at you. She smells just as organic as the flower did and that helps ground you at least.

“I thought I made it expressly clear I needed you alive,” she hisses softly but her eyes are sliding over you in fits and there’s a hint at something not too reproachful in them.

You humph but negate to curse her out the way you want. Or at least the way some people seem to think you will going off of the half cringes taking over the faces of the other two women behind Ivy.

You roll your eyes.

“I am a human and you put me on distract-the-animal-mutate-s duty. I don’t know what you expected,” you swallow, “but thanks…”

Ivy shrugs then points over her shoulder at an interestingly disheveled Harley. When she lets go of you she pushes you toward the blonde without another word.

Said woman smiles wide and waves at you, cringe forgotten for now, but covered head to toe by what might be soot with her outfit askew and hair sticking up in all types of directions.

“Please tell me something hasn’t already exploded.”

“Oh no!” Harley scoffs at your concern as she walks to you, bat swinging lowly in her dropped hand. She does gesticulate with it languidly, indicating a side of the embassy you’d managed to miss until now that’s definitely seen better days. “The building’s structure just wasn’t worth shit. Frosty barely flicked it before it started crumbling over our heads. Me and Cat slipped out just fine though, don’t worry!”

“Uh huh,” you grunt offhandedly, hands already rifling through your pack for the supplies.

You weren’t a surgeon but for your friend you could make this work. Would have to make this work because if you don’t pull this off you’re not entirely certain Ivy won’t kill you, fondness for you be damned.

Harley turns for you without you having to ask and you set to work right away; consulting the schematics Selina had managed to steal and your own scattered knowledge of anatomy to extract both of the bombs deep in the base of her neck and the tracker embedded in her bicep.

It’s as you’re working on the second bomb that Harley begins to fidget. Starting to rock in place for a second before remembering what’s happening, or moving to get a crink out of her neck but stopping herself half way.

At one point she rocks back enough that your retrieval tool clinks against the pill sized bomb and you tense, teeth grinding together. The localized EMP you were using to slow the bombs tampering fail safe wasn’t foolproof, it would still go off if you messed with it too fast, but you couldn’t block the transmitter entirely cause that’d definitely tip off Waller and she’d detonate the bombs in a heartbeat.

When nothing aside from your heart dropping into your spleen occurs you breathe out a small sigh.

Harley doesn’t see the panic flash across your face but she does see how Ivy reacts to it. If looks could kill you’d be way past the seventh gate of hell by now.

Harley’s voice cuts through the tension.

“What’s going on?”

“Just…hold still so I can cut the damn bomb out, Harls.”

“Sorry sorry,” she shrugs the smallest bit. “I’m getting antsy is all.”

“Well stop it,” you murmur.

Your tweezers finally get a decent grasp of the implant and you extract it carefully. It comes out even smoother than the last and you hand the bomb to a thickly structured plant that Ivy has walk a good distance away from you all.

Collectively all of your abdomens unclench and every one of you starts moving lighter. The tracker is extracted soon after and you plop it into Harley’s hand, happy to be rid of the stressor.

Harley cheers, throwing the tracker toward the vicinity of Cooperhead’s limp body. She runs up to Ivy right after that, jumps into the taller’s embrace and they share a passionate kiss.

You raise your brows, turning away. Selina and you both exchange a glance and when she walks over to give you your own hug you reciprocate the gesture.

“Thanks for helping out,” she says into the side of your head. You nod into her shoulder before pulling apart. You both squeeze each other's hands, her lighter thumbs rubbing lightly over your knuckles.

“Humph,” you duck your head at the way she meets your eyes and let go of her to go examine the stagnant bombs.

Selina leaves you to stare at them.

They’re so …innocent looking when they’re just chilling in the middle of one of Ivy’s oversized plants. You’d never expect they’d be able to take out two people if a second person was close enough. It was barbaric.

The scoff you let out is full of contempt.

Harley peeks over your shoulder, energy revitalized without the threat of death hovering so close, and the only reason you don’t startle is practice. Even crazier is that you haven’t seen her in nearly a year and her absurd knack for sneaking up on you was still familiar.

“Harley,” you admonish quietly, making yourself relax back and willing your heart rate down.

Naturally, Harley ignores you. “So you gonna disarm them now, or what?”

Harley having broken the seal, Ivy and Selina move to gather around the plant with you as well.

You hum at Harley’s question, “I could do that…or…” you meet the gazes of the women with you and their eyes glint back with a similar desire.

_ _ _

All of your laughter echoes into the night air, nothing but knocked out Squad members scattered about and crickets in your near surroundings.

“Planting the bombs in the underside of the Squad’s truck was a good idea, Y/n. I knew you still had it in ya!”

You scoff, “Right?”

“Yeah, and I say we keep this ball rolling!” Harley announces. She’s linked arms with Ivy, leaning into the other woman as they walk. “Get the team back together for some real excitement!”

Ivy stares down at her with an uncomfortable amount of affection and you have to look away from her and from Harley’s expectant expression. Unfortunately that means you’re looking at Selina instead and the way she grins at you sends your heart racing.

Yeah, no. Ultimately you settle on only looking straight ahead of you, brows furrowing as you think about how exactly you’re gonna get home. You clear your throat.

“You guys have fun with that. I’ma head home though.”

Harley makes an anguished sound.

“No, whaddya mean? Let’s go have some fun!” She detangles herself from Ivy to sling an arm over your shoulder. “I missed my favorite arsonist and it’s been forever since we’ve all been together. We should totally celebrate!”

You hear an “Oh boy,” off to the side from Selina and couldn’t agree more.

“I’m not an arsonist, Harls.”

She giggles, “Sure you are. When you go out on the town you usually explode shit, and that comes with lots of fire.”

“Okay, but the fire isn’t the goal. I’m not obsessed with it like Firefly’s crazy ass.”

“So what? You’re basically an arsonist with more steps. Fire starters still a fire starter if ya asks me. Ain’t that right, Red?”

You glance at each other over the blonde's head, your own shaking minutely, but Ivy just smirks.

“On the money, Love.”

Damnit, you should’ve asked Selena for help. Harley squeals and rushes away from you to catch Ivy up in a hug again.

“Ohhh, I knew you had my back, Iv!”

She ends the hug after kissing Ivy some more then snatches something off Selina’s belt and bounds over to you with it.

“Here.”

Harley pushes something into your chest—a ski mask

You guffaw.

“Oh no, I did not come here to fucking steal with you. All you bitches bring is trouble.”

“If we’re such trouble then why’d you come babes? We’ve already been working together and none of our recreational activities ever don’t lead to a little trouble anyway.”

“Just like helping breakout and disable the bombs put into an inmate, which you just did, mind you,” Ivy adds very unhelpfully.

You curb the urge to flip her off - an action Ivy would surely laugh off anyway - instead focusing on Selina taking up your immediate line of vision.

“They’re right,” she croons. The claws of her glove tap at the mask. “Just think of this as an early Christmas present.”

You turn the mask over in your hands, running your fingers over the two points at the top. Cat ears.

“Your old mask? Really?”

She shrugs, “It fit in my pocket.”

You shake your head at all three of them - Ivy too. She better not think she looks any more subtle than the other two with her up-to-no-good smirk fully in place. Upstanding citizens don’t make that face at the prospect of an impromptu heist.

“What would we even steal?”

Harley smiles.

“Wellll, Waller sent us to retrieve some old super important papers. Not really my thing but treasury documents sell like crazy. They’re like the government secrets of the bonds world, big men inbetween wives with fragile senses of self worth pay top dollar for them.”

Clearly being able to see the wheels in your head turning in her favor Selina drapes herself over your shoulders. She doesn’t even have the decency to assuage your ego by speaking, just starts playing with the way some of your coils are tight enough to spring back into shape when they’re pulled on. You blow air out from your nose and the way she chuckles reverberates up your spine.

“Now that you mention it, Harley, what does Amanda want with decades old bookkeeping anyway?”

“Leverage, Kitty Cat,” you can feel the way Selina’s eyes narrow and Harley laughs, “Waller serves the US government, and nothing does those a-holes better than a boon they can hold over some foreign schmucks’ heads.”

“Compelling argument,” you murmur, still twisting the mask over and over in your hold.

When you look up both Harley and Ivy are giving you expectant looks. Selina pokes you in the side.

“Just say yes, Slick,” she takes the mask and slips it over your head before walking around to grab your hand and pull you towards the others, “You know you're itching for the thrill.”

You give their words a second more of consideration before your lips purse.

“Fine,” Harley lets out a whoop, “but the second we get wind of Bats we leave.”

“Deal!”

NOTES: Hope you enjoyed!!

btw: if you’d like to leave a comment I’d very much appreciate it! this is a sideblog tho so I won’t respond.

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