#not when i cant figure out if they really care about me or not! its messing with me a little!

[thegnomelord]

plap plap plap plap get pregnant get pregnant get pregnant. me getting these damn military boys pregnant

im still on da cruise UGHHH

johnny really likes chocolate. its bad. he constantly craves it—you cant even hide it from him, sniffs it out like a fucking dog. soo…those aphrodisiac chocolates in the fridge? oh, he doesn’t read the packaging. god forbid he has any inhibitions after that.

uhh graves has like seven cats. he loves cats. theyre easy to care for, plus he can leave them alone for a week or so while he’s working. so…when he visits a particular petshop during his mission—underground shit going on here, some fucked up experiments on demihumans or other. he finds a scared little catboy just about to be messed with before his team bursts in. well…there’s no rules against taking this one home right?

UGH VOMITS EVERYWHERE I HAVE SO MANY THOUGHTS ABOUT VALERIA BUT IDK IF YOU WRITE FOR HER SO….probably not sigh

anyways i think gaz with the fattest tcock is like canon ngl hes so proud of it. no shame at all. and gaz is NASTY like that you know he doesnt care if they look at him weird in the lockers (i wish sigh)

-the flower you know who i am i cant find the silly symbol ugh

-❀

What do people even do on a cruise? Like I get traveling to different countries by boat but there's a big stretch of time where you're just on the sea with fuck all to look at.

Also damn dude r you reading mine and Embry's thoughts? Cause legit yesterday we were simpin over preggo Simon lol. Imagine his belly would be soooooo fucking huge and he'd grumble all the time lol.

Also yeah, I'm gay as fuck and only like men, you can go to embry so you two bi disasters can simp over valeria.

Also I'm kinda laughing at the idea of Graves 'adopting' the demihuman reader who's being trafficked or some shit, and just assumes you're the common house cat variety cause you're small from being starved n shit. Only to figure out you're actually a mountain lion or a black jaguar demihuman when you grow fucking massive after a few months under his care. 👀

Also you are so right, Gaz has a massive tcock and he's so smug about it.

#gnome correspondence #gnome's tea break #❀anon

[wright-phoenix]

. . . i'm too aro for this

#i saw someone talk about “obvious” romantic tension between phoenix/maya and athena/simon #and that the average cishet normie consumer would assume they were implied romantic #and i sat there for a full minute trying to process that #because literally all i got from these pairings was big sibling energy #and i realize everyone reads that differently but. #the level of being annoying and being annoyed between maya and phoenix.... #and the whole “i gotta be a big sister” and the whole. maya is mia's little sister so by extention kind of also #taken under phoenix's wing after mia's death #the way they constantly joke about maya being childish bc she likes steel samurai (she isn't. edgeworth also likes it #he's just too stuck up to admit it. also liking “childish” things doesnt make u childish but i digress) #but anyway the joke abt maya being childish vs phoenix being grown up #furthering the perception of the difference between them and maya as a sort of younger sibling figure #and then athena and simon.... #simon literally having been her babysitter somewhat. having played with her when she was younger #and when the Mom Murder Incident happened he cared for her and got her out of there #and took on the blame “for her” ..... #all of that screams older brother to me the way he carried her away from the scene. she was just a child #IDK IS IT REALLY SUPPOSED TO BE OBVIOUSLY ROMANTICALLY IMPLIED????????? #WHAT...... #i KNOW there are people who ship phoenix and maya or athena and simon and that's fine #but to me they were OBVIOUSLY sibling coded instead of OBVIOUSLY romance coded #😭😭😭 #help meeeee #cas.txt #i cant tell if the post i saw was an outlier and tinted by Fandom Perception #or if that's like. a big general consensus and i just don't see it bc i curate my online experience #bc it could go either way. i can see it being an outlier that found its way onto my dash #but i could also see it as a bigger agreed upon thing that just never crossed my dash bc i only interact with sibling content 😭 #either way it baffled me

[poisonouspastels]

#i figured this would be better suited for a separate post continuing from here #I've had people get angry at me for giving Steve a proper strongman build - thus making him fat and muscular in the process #ive gotten people mad at me for making him his direct colorpicked skin tone. got told I made him ''the wrong color'' for it #got called slurs #got told i need to just ''take a joke'' when im getting right fully angry at people telling me im wrong for making his AU design that way #been quite literally told our art looks ''ugly as hell'' when people ran out of bigoted arguments #its all just getting really hard and really tiring to keep doing what i love when everyone is vocal about hating it #and very few people are vocal about liking it #i do art for me dont get me wrong. and people have been supportive. #but i cant help but wonder if anyone would have even cared about the mega ref at all if it hadn't been surrounded by people full of hate #its just hard to stay motivated and put my all into something that's gotten so much backlash for stupid reasons you know #i've been putting so much love into my work surrounding this AU lately. my writing and my art. for over the past year now #i try not to ask anything in return other than for people to just pay attention to it at all. give it a reblog #but the one time we have something out of it become popular its because people are stupid and bigoted #i dont care about numbers this isnt about that. i just care about returning the passion i put into the world. #if anyone wants to send anything my way feel free. i could use it #sorry for venting

[lynxalon]

gamers i feel fuckennnnnn terrible ✌️

#hm. #like. this particular situation feels hopeless like i cant salvage anything #its like when glass cracks and u know its broken and dangerous and all it would take is one lil push #and itd just fall #like. i always wanna be someone who tries but. i always try until im raw and bleeding and worse for it #theres trying and theres not knowing when enough is enough and i just dont know where the line is between that #is it really unsalvageable or do i just not wanna hurt over this any more #i know im cared about but. theres one person who i wish cared more. who i wish didnt say things and promise things #because now that its later down the line its clear none of that meant a thing which is exactly what i said then #promises like that dont last. especially from those with commitment issues. i would know. #its why i dont make those kinds of promises. only very rarely. and now im gonna be made into a liar #promise breaker. i hate that #i keep complaining about this and. i keep giving myself a few days. a week. over and over. #'maybe it'll change when my heads clearer. maybe i'll feel differently later' #and tbf i do for a bit. but it doesnt last. it lasts for less time each time i try that #im still mad and upset and hurt #i'll figure it out but. why me. why does this happen

[lecliss]

Wait while I'm here lemme say something that's been on my mind for like 2 weeks at least. So, Yahiko was alive when Obito first came to Ame and talked to Nagato. The canonical ages of Obito and Nagato in shippuden are 31 and 35 respectively. So the ame orphans are all 4 years older than Obito. Considering Yahiko died at 15, the oldest Obito could be when meeting Nagato is..... 11. When did Obito have his death scare and meet Madara before leaving for Ame??? When he was 13. Sooooo... unless I somehow got something wrong, and please correct me if I did, Kishimoto is once again a hack fraud.

#also related. if i remember the math correctly. obi is 15 when he attacked the village with kurama #and not that i think thats incorrect timeline wise. cuz it is right. i just think its REALLY funny that thats a 15yo. he pointed a kunai at #a baby and i couldnt take it seriously anymore years ago when i figured that out #like the concept of the masked man in general is SO funny CUZ THATS A FUCKING TEENAGER LMAOOOO #i think by the time of the massacre hes a young adult tho but im talking about the time period prior to that #LIKE PROPER TIMELINE WISE WHEN OBI MEETS THE ORPHANS HE SHOULD BE LIKE 14 IF HIS BIRTHDAY OCCURED DURING THOSE 6 MONTHS WITH MADA OR WHILE #HE WAS TRAVELLING. SO LIKE. AGAIN. THATS A TEENAGER. AND NOT A PARTICULARLY OLD ONE EITHER MIND YOU #like goddamn just everything about obi even despite all the trauma and horrors is just. so. goofy. #hes a fucking joke to me but like in a good way. hes starting to become like jeje to me where i can only make fun of every little thing #about him. i mean. look at who he was as a kid. how babey he still technically is when he starts doing villain shit #THE FUCKING TOBI THING WHICH I WILL NEVER SHUT UP ABOUT. I DONT FUCKING CARE THAT ITS BEEN OVER A DECADE SINCE WE LOST THE TOBI PERSONA. #I DONT CARE. I WILL NEVER BE OVER NOT GETTING ANSWERS ON WHAT THE FUCK HE WAS THINKING DOING THAT SHIT #WHY DID HE FUCKING ACT LIKE THAT???? AND YOU EXPECT ME TO TAKE HIM SERIOUSLY???? WHEN SENPAI IS RIGHT THERE????? #i cant fucking do this. hes a fucking joke (affectionate) i love him so much he breaks my heart. the poor fucking loser #personal

[bloodbankzz]

im doing soooooo bad♡ besties and others♡

#its OKAY becayse im ALIVE #this is mentallt and physicaally for those INTERESTED! #i need to PEEL the worms from my BRAIN after NEARLY passing out walking across the ROOM #MANY MULTIFACETED STRUGGLES! #TO ALL READERS WHO INQUIRE! #i dont really believe im like yhis but i dont knpw what i really am supposed to be #i cant figure out whats underneath even when i can see the cracks #what do you do when you can tell its wrong but you dont have any answrrs for what is right #rejection feels like futile struggle #its wrong or nothing #right???? #what do i do #i hope when i have to face it and see a cardiologist they are niceys to me and helpful and everything goes okay #im so scared of doctors nowadays #if anything goes wrong it will be my fault and even if they knew a lot are too busy to care #and why am i even worried about the social aspects when its my fucking blood pumper at risk anyway right #god i dont know #i dont know anything anymore #i dont get better anymore #i dont know the way forward #but im gonna put off dying for as long as possible #better an alive aloof listless failure than dead #its so difficult to be berated though #and i am so afraid all the time #and being in the applying for jobs limbo means i cant even get high about it all!!!!!!!!!!!!

[oldirontender]

i absolutely adore making my non ttte fan friends watch ttte movies with me. just watched journey beyond sodor and they were fucking LOSING it at thomas singing “i even miss james.... im not kidding i even miss james...” like every time i show them anything from the series theyre always like “god why are they such ASSHOLES so each other” and i really never have an answer like idk guys the engines just love bullying each other 😭 that’s their love language ig

#rambling #i love them so so much #they have to sit through their 18 yr old friend go absolutely crazy over a green animated train #like i know they really could care less about the lore of thomas the tank engine but they still listen to me nevertheless <3 #its so funny when they try to talk abt it with me cause they REALLY cant tell the difference between a majority of the engines😭😭 #theyll point at edward and be like YOOOOOOOOOOOOO THOMAS!!!! and ill have to be like noooooooo..... thats the old man.... #it took them a while to figure out the difference between thomas and edward LMFAO

[hartmannyoukaigirl]

people who are batshit insane bipolar narcissists who happen to take an unfortunate interest in religion: yeah like I get told off by my entire family because I won't stfu about how they're all going to hell. I can't believe them. or when I tell my friend the same thing and they insult me or call me too religious like I am literally stating facts?? not my fault it's god's 🙄 can't believe they're following religion wrongly and not like My Holy Interpretation and way of practice

#no bc. i am muslim and 💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀 its a struggle if not for my absolute convinction in god #man. honestly #i'll like a story and then come online or talk to someone else about it and they'll have the most absurd and obviously wrong interpretation #so of course something like this happens with something so important as religion. the vast majority of people are stupid no matter what #unfortunately #idk im not denying the quran either. i Really Really hate being delusional and denying whats Infront of me or whats otherwise #literally the truth of. everything #but yknow we are human... the truth is that we aren't angels who do no wrong and are perfect and we shouldnt treat others like that #like i cant fathom seeing someone do something even factually wrong and instead of trying to figure out the Core reason theyre doing that #or their feelings or their mentality #which are the cause and root of everything btw #you just insult them and call them names and say theyre better not practicing at all or FORCING THEM to do whats right #like idfc if the thing youre forcing them to do IS factually right I do not care youre ruining and tainting islam by your actions. #that mentality is so disgusting. to be the judge of someone and order them around #at the end of everything Everyone has their own opinion and choice #if you truly are convinced islam is right then you won't force your child to practice. your child will eventually practice by themselves #when they grow up! and realize how the world works #and if they dont then oh well. everyone is going to be judged alone and that's their problem yknow #it may be incredibly frusterating but ultimately cope #theres nothing right that will be right with yelling and fighting and screaming and force.

[friendlifyre]

i cant tell if its the autism tm that skews my perception or if ive just really been through enough shit these past few years that my emotional maturity is now explicitly above average

#personal #seeing people who clearly want and need help be all cryptic about how they feel and making it like pulling teeth to communicate with them #makes me wanna tear my hair out #I Am Here For You !!!!! just Talk to me !!!!!!!! god #trying to leave every figurative ball in their court but they just dismiss it and then act like im the one who didnt try #its so reminiscent of my last job where i always had to be the one bending myself over backwards to accommodate the other party #im getting anxious just thinking about it knowing where that led me after months and months of caving in to the other's needs #without any regards for my own #really trying to will myself not to go down that path but its hard when i care #and i Know if i did reach out and compromise myself to be accommodating it would Work #but goddammit i cant always be the bigger person !!! please !!! cut me some slack sometimes !!!! meet me halfway !!!! im trying dammit

[kurozu501]

elden ring is genuinely so incredibly addicting, ive been playing it nonstop in my free time the last few days and yet i still wake up like i gotta play more elden ring i gotta get back into it. 

#elden ring #trying to figure out why this game is so endlessly fun while botw bored me after awhile #i think its that fromsoft's combat system makes the whole world that much more challenging and therefore more interesting #when the world really pushes back and challenges you it hooks you in in a way zelda cant really do #i care about stuff in elden ring bc i earned it with my own two bloody hands

[sirompp]

just saw a l0whunt post where they KISSED feeling VERY violated even though it was properly tagged and i was the one who clicked on it anyway. but.

#IN MY DEFENSE i was just expecting them to be like standing next to each other #because like 70% of the time when i click on a l0whunt post thats jst what it IS #anyway im never projecting my aromanticness onto another character again because this is just hell #i could say all the other reasons why other more normal people hate this ship but ill be honest i dont really care about any of that!! #its just fuel to the fire to me. to help me feel more justified on why seeing it makes me genuinely want to cry #URGH. I JUST. WHY IS IT EVERYWHERE #YES im biased but SERIOUSLY it GENUINELY SUCKS AS A SHIP. #is it because its the only possible m/f ship in the show. be honest. is it #is that why this ship with no more development than about a dozen frames of blushes from 1 guy who easily blushes anyway #became more popular than fucking L//UMIT//Y #<- CENSORED SO IT WONT SHOW UP IN TAGS IVE GOT NOTHING AGAINST THE SHIP #i mean i dont really. Care. about them BUT I CAN PERFECTLY TOLERATE THEM ON SCREEN WITH NO VISCERAL DISCOMFORT WHICH MEANS ITS WELL WRITTEN #because. AGAIN. im AROMANTIC and very Very romance repulsed #<-''but siro if youre soooo romance repulsed why are you a fan of the bug and cat show'' i literally cant explain it #i genuinely dont know why i love the show sm when i literally have to cover my eyes any time they start RECIPROCATING FEELINGS EW GROSS!! #ive gone off topic #and i cant even be like. lowhunt fans dni. because. thats EIGHTY PERCENT OF THE FUCKING FANDOM #i follow like a DOZEN PEOPLE who ship it!! #actually ALL of the owl... um. the owl show people i follow ship it aside from like TWO PEOPLE #<-trying to figure out how to get my point across without this showing up in the main tags because. hoo boy. i dont wanna deal with that #oh and itd upset people or whatever. Sad! They all upset me constantly but i guess i have to be the BIGGER PERSON or whatever #UGH <-annoyed but would rather die than upset other pepole #im tired of being respectful. i want to let hatred into my heart #this is like the 1 thing in the whole entire world i let myself hold any feelings of animosity for #i just. HATRED #ANGER AND HATRED AND #twitter is so fucking smug about it too #like ill see posts with the most. stupid of things and itll be QRT'd a million times with #''lets see the lowhunt deniers explain THIS'' #like. I hate your guts

[muirneach]

okay well i practiced guitar and i have not played in like two or three months but it was very nice and fun i just sat and sang my silly folk songs while reading off of ultimate guitar tabs. anyways if you’ve never been to toronto for labour day weekend there’s this event called the airshow where they get the fucking military jets and do tricks or whatever. which is fine i guess except they fly directly over my house and are loud as hell. and this will happen until monday kill me now. anyways so it was interesting singing phil ochs with that going on. but it got too loud so i stopped. nonetheless i’m still able to play guitar 👍

#phil was right cant be singing louder than the guns when im gone 🙄 #i havent played guitar because well i Dont Want To #i don’t particularly care for it but i do it cause i enjoy going to lessons cause um. i dont get out much #and since lessons are starting back up i figured i should probably practice #also i dont do it because i feel im not particularly good at it :/ #ive been doing it four or five years like i have all the technical stuff down really well #you give me tabs and i can play it without having heard it before #but. i cannot memorize to save my life (so there goes any dreams of performing. not that i had any) #and also it just? doesnt sound very good??? #and like no its not because i dont practice enough even when i played multiple times a week it just. doesnt sound too nice #oh well! i never did it to make anything of it anyways so its okay #i just feel a little sad about that. like i wish i could’ve memorized songs and always had something in my back pocket to play for people #but i dont. sad. but theres other hobbies #guitar #anyways enough of that lets all join in our hatred for the airshow #i hate you loud as hell jets and massive pollution #not to mention. our large refugee population. like aight lets bring the snowbirds in surely that’s fine #ugh. anyways im gonna go draw or something

[norymal]

would you forgive me if i said i liked clint …

#for context the first time i fainted n got fucked in the mines #i was saved by clint ! and it was like 80 levels down #and went OH you dragged ME? ALL THE WAY UP? uhmmm can i see your muscles #ik in the context of you marrying emily the dialogue doesnt get fixed up #which i dont care . emily is my best friend that performs crystal stuff while i let her despite not believing in it #emily heart scene scaring me . i forgot theyre romantic or whatever . CLINT COME BACK AND SAVE ME #^_^ a lil disappointed new dialogue pushes him further into incel box but whatever the mind is a powerful tool . changes this #volcel (emory) versus incel #i also just like big hairy sweaty men so theres that LMAO #i ALSO CANT BRING MYSELF TO DISLIKE ANY NPC… #the least i care about is prof snail n birdie. i really liked birdies fetch quest tho it was fun but #i did end up searching the entire island before realizing i had to gift it to someone #playing generally blind so its v fun when i figure stuff out from clues like the books in the library :) #hey . this guy is rambling about not clint #i also think hes sorta cute with it i like my freaks and losers and blacksmiths #little steps farm

[miallurk]

Damn. One thing going wrong and I'm going full mental breakdown huh.

#probably because of bottling my feelings up #honestly at this point i'm considering giving up but some people were really sweet to me and that's really been helping #and that one anon in my other blog who almost got me to cry just because they said “i love your writing” #shit i am legit tearing up #people are so nice sometimes i just. fucking hell i love when people are caring but i have feelings that are kept in a bottle from before #i was even like. in 3rd grade. #i want to keep reaching out i do #but i feel so insignificant when i do some stupid shit and. people want to talk to me. they care. and they listen. #i feel so. bad for taking up their time. surely they have something better to do than waste their time on me im a failure. i cant do anythi #g. but. they do. and that fucks me up so badly. those people do not know how much i appreciate even a brief chat. #i am starving for humanity and its connections. #i am also struggling #and living in times of war is so fucking hard when no one cares about you. it was so hard to come to terms with that i'm a war child. #a child of war. fathered by a soldier who had seen horrors of it beforehand. and who has not spoken of them despite screaming in the dead #of night. i am. having a full on breakdown huh. apparently. it's just. fucking insane. i really need to talk to someone about this. and hav #a ten hour nap preferably. #looks at crow bubbles miss detective log and hannah and my old old mutuals. i love you all still no matter how brief or insignificant our #interactions were. i love you. you mean the world to me. you made me who i am like an amateur makes a silly clay figure never meant for muc #it is so hard to go on with old memories as bugs in my brain #this.. started as a drawing program error vent and became me pouring my feelings here. same as always ig. #i love you humanity i love you reaching out i love you desire to care and ve cared about i love you yearning i love you helping without a #need to ask i love you human emotions i love you people #it feels like i'm not one myself honestly. humans are so.. so horrifyingly endearing to me i am suffocating with unspoken love #fucking my love is mine all mine and poison and ghosting and oleander fuck you songs you make me emotional too. humans are so humans.

[mobtism]

noooooo im having media analysis thoughts about an unpopular finished series. 😞

#okay but im so😭😭😭 #thinking about this boy & the 3 people in his life who are considered 'father' figures to him. #his bio father who was shitty & abandoned/neglected him. #the [redacted] who refers to HIMSELF as a father figure always claiming that he 'raised him' but hes nowhere near that. hes literally the #worst ever and could never actually be considered a father figure and put that kid through more trauma and pain and grief than you can c- #count on your fingers. nowhere near being a father figure ever. scum of the earth and should die #then... the reporter who looked out for him since day one and was part of their little found family and even refer to each other as #'dad' & 'son' when undercover. and then he 😭😭 then he really tells someone 'hes like a son to me' #and its like. sobbing my fucking eyes out. #i cant get the rest of my words out. but smth smth this boys been through hell and has never had anyone truly care about him and now he does #🌟

[dizzybevvie]

I think one of the biggest issues I have is just assuming that Im a back up friend to everyone

#dgmw! its never been a big deal I dont care much and I understand #and this is gonna sound edgy but i find it difficult to feel emotion that isnt really intense? if that makes sense #so i dont think i realise how lonely i am a lot of the time :// #idk. its weird. #I see people at school I would consider myself quite close to because in reality i have like one close friend #and seeing them be so close to their friends hurts a lil yknow? #not mad at them obviously just. around them #Especially when theyre dudes. theyll never understand how jealous i am of them #or that one friend i really enjoy spending time with who admitted to ditching me for their other friends after lying and saying she forgot #again i wasnt mad at her because I understand but. i cant help but feel like Im doing something wrong #im glad she was upfront and honest with me because thats all i ask but i just. UGH #And all the popular kids at my school are actually friendly and nice and funny #But all I can talk about is how to train your dragon and stare for way too long trying to figure out what to say #Its frustrating because I know its not their fault and like. thats the worst part. #All the people at my school who talk to me Im genuinely flattered that they enjoy my company at least a little bit #When I hit the age of 8 and realised I wasnt good st making friends and stopped trying I just. god. #I understand what I'm doing wrong but I dont know how to change without being thoroughly exhausted #and id rather have energy than be liked but #I dont know. I just wish people liked me. #Again I GET that people my age are just assholes and thats part of it. thats why ive never cared abt no one ever crushing on me because #i have a belly and arm hair and a flat face and cellulite and no jawline and thinner eyes and leg hair and a resting bitch face #and I find some of those traits endearing but i know teenage boys wont #its upsetting. i dont know. #all it takes is not being accepted by one (1) guy to be back to being four years old wondering if my dad wouldve stayed if i were a boy #. #Idk. Ill unpack this later (lie) #oversharing on main #rant #vent #apollo says stuff