#not me logging in here just to check my year in review for this year lol
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I posted 17,358 times in 2022
2,332 posts created (13%)
15,026 posts reblogged (87%)
Blogs I reblogged the most:
@mrskodzuken
@everythingfox
@chibishae34
@kagejima
@shinsoups
I tagged 6,675 of my posts in 2022
#🐱saku.ask - 1,778 posts
#🐱saku.rbs - 1,368 posts
#icymi <3 - 921 posts
#🐱saku.say - 675 posts
#🐱saku.smut - 635 posts
#🐱banana.q - 576 posts
#🐱saku.game - 482 posts
#tumblr ask game - 393 posts
#🐱saku.reads - 392 posts
#self rb - 378 posts
Longest Tag: 117 characters
#good lawd 😳😳😳😳😳😳😳😳😳🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️
My Top Posts in 2022:
#5
395 notes - Posted March 20, 2022
#4
hi! i've been going through some serious kenma brainrot and i thought of this: idk if you remember or saw that tiktok challenge in which a person teased their gamer partner as they were playing by walking into the room in a towel and then dropping it to find it how they would react. now think about it with kenma. it's been playing on repeat on my mind for dayss
402 notes - Posted March 11, 2022
#3
470 notes - Posted January 22, 2022
#2
472 notes - Posted May 24, 2022
My #1 post of 2022
683 notes - Posted February 18, 2022
Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →
#tumblr2022#year in review#my 2022 tumblr year in review#your tumblr year in review#not me logging in here just to check my year in review for this year lol
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A Tumblr Quick Start Guide
A year ago, I realized that every time I logged onto Twitter, I felt my blood pressure rise. It's a platform that runs on anger and outrage, and I wanted someplace better to spend my screen time. In my almost-year on Tumblr, I now realize I log on here and get one or two good laughs every time I check my dashboard.
Tumblr has given me a lot lately, but it is a bit different than other platforms. I'd like to give back a little and provide a quick-start guide on how being new to Tumblr worked for me.
Finding Things to Follow
The biggest thing I had to get used to was realizing that on Tumblr, you don't necessarily follow people or celebrities or politicians. You follow your interests. In fact, it's pretty common to follow only strangers that post things you like. That can make your empty dash daunting to fill! Let's fill it with things you love and make you happy.
Make a list, mental or otherwise, of things you're interested in. Be both broad and specific! Board Games. Magic The Gathering. Supernatural. Marvel. Video Games. 8-Bit. Urban planning. Any and all things that you like!
Pick one of your interests and search for that tag. Flip between "Latest" and "Top" and browse around to see what kind of content is in that tag. You'll notice images, art, gif sets, TikToks, videos, essays - all sorts of things!
If you see a lot of things you like, cool! Click the button to Follow that tag if you want to keep up to date on it and find things later (we'll come back to this).
If you see a post you love, check out who posted or reblogged it. Scroll around on their blog. Do they post similar stuff? Are there other things you like here? Are they posting often? If you like what they post, follow the blog! Congrats, you've followed your first blog!
Take some time and check out some other tags and follow the same process - follow tags you like and blogs you might be interested in. It's not possible to over-follow! You can always curate your list later. This isn't Twitter - no one cares if you unfollow someone. Find what makes you happy.
Go back to your main dashboard - how are things looking? Filled with things you're interested in? Excellent. If things don't work for you, don't be afraid to unfollow blogs.
Want to follow more blogs? New episode of Andor drop? Go to the "Your Tags" header and scroll around to find some more juicy content. Check out blogs you like, follow 'em if you like em, rinse and repeat! That's curating your dash!
Your Blog is Your House
Okay, so you have a dashboard of content that you like - but what do you do with it all? Someone once described a Tumblr blog to me like your little house that you can fill with all the things you like. There is no rhyme or reason, and you don't need an excuse to reblog something other than the fact that you liked it!
If you see something you like, reblog it! To me, I reblog things when I say "I like this and I want it to live in my house so other people can see it when they come visit"
Reblogging is like passing a message along to other people. You can just reblog it on its own to amplify it, or you can add your own tags, or if you have a funny reaction gif/thought/video/thousand-word-essay, add to it when you reblog!
Use tags. People actually find posts through tags here. Use them to help people discover that really cool reblog you found! You can also search for tags on specific blogs. This makes them great for categorizing posts on your own blog. For example, I use #2022 Game Journal when I blog about whatever game I'm playing so I can do a year-end review later and find all the posts later.
Like things too. Likes don't amplify posts, but they're nice to let a poster know you appreciated it! I also use likes a bookmark. Sometimes I don't have time to watch that TikTok, so I'll like it as a reminder to come back to it later.
Be Weird. You can have sideblogs to hold more specific content, but don't be afraid to just scoop up anything you like and put it in your house! Reblogging is how content gets passed around.
Random Blog Tips
Wow nice job, your blog's looking great! Before you know it, someone will find it, check out your posts, and maybe give you a follow if they like what you've made or what your reblog! The last thing I'll touch on here are some nitty-gritty tips that can help you think about all the meta stuff about Tumblr:
Tumblr is the most anonymous social media platform. No one has to know who you are. Take advantage of all the privacy options.
You can also hide likes and who you follow from public view - that's no one else's business! Turn off asks too if you want.
Play around with your settings in general - there are lots of customization options and other dash tabs that you can use to find new content. You can also turn on timestamps so you know if a post you see is a "heritage post," as they say. Content is evergreen here and I personally like to see that in action.
You can filter and hide tags that you don't want to see.
Just block people liberally, it's cool.
You can pay to remove ads (nice), but you can also leave the option to see Blazed posts on. Blazed posts are ones that people pay for impressions for - and any post can be Blazed. The kicker is, there's no ad targeting. It can be quite funny or quite annoying depending on what you want.
When viewing the notes on a post, you'll see comments, reblogs, and likes. For the reblogs section, I like to filter by "Comments only" to find what people have added to the post.
Like all social media sites, there are dark corners here. I think Tumblr more than most puts you in control to curate your Dashboard to only see what you want. Block a user, hide a post, and move on.
That should be quite enough to get started! Tumblr can take a little more time to "get" compared to other social media platforms (and get in on the long-running jokes!), but trust me, after a week, you'll notice the difference between checking your Tumblr dashboard and checking your Twitter timeline.
Your blood pressure will thank you.
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I think I got a lot of new followers recently because twitter keeps going to shit. However, as you probably know I can't and don't post nsfw art here.
You can find my NSFW socials on my pinned post. I think a lot of people are hesitant to join platforms which aren't fully available to the public yet but if you'd like to keep up with my nsfw art I'd like to:
Urge you to visit my website and subscribe to my RSS feed for gallery updates!
Suggest you follow me on either Pillowfort or Cohost (18+).
In the last year I have started using PF and Cohost more than Mastodon, as they've implemented new features and their posting system is more in line with what I enjoy: robust tagging and filtering, ability to post MANY images, and readmores for long posts.
If you've been hesitant to join either of those platforms since you don't know what to expect here's a small-ish review of both purely from my experience as someone who: a) enjoys profile customization b) likes to have an organized art gallery that is filterable by tags.
This review is aimed at artists looking for NSFW spaces to post! UI screenshots might have suggestive terms and images. Proceed with caution.
Edit: Good grief tunglr, if you open this on the web dash the images aren't shown in the neat galleries I put them in to make the post shorter. Head on over to the permalink if you'd like a better looking post!
Let me just say that if you're looking for a review on more technical aspects of these platforms, like security and moderation policies. I'm not your guy. You'll have to look elsewhere for that. I'm focusing on QoL UI and community aspects.
Though both these platforms allow nsfw, please make sure to read their ToS/Community Guidelines for rules on what is and isn't allowed. Though as far as I'm aware they have pretty similar rules.
Pillowfort
Overview::
Pillowfort has more years under its belt being available to users than Cohost does, as such I THINK the artist/fandom userbase atm is larger, which means you might see more activity there. UI as of right now is very comfortable and the site runs pretty smoothly. Loading times are very decent. Posting is easy, though the image uploader is a little wonky (they are working on fixing this). You are able to create and manage communities based on interests or themes, which people can follow or join and all post in the same space. You can personalize your profile by adding images, links, and formatted text to your sidebar, as well as customize your own profile colors. Tag searches in my experience yield results of both art and aesthetic irl porn and gifs. If that's something you miss from ye olden tumblr days it might be worth a look.
Pros:
Posts have privacy options (everyone, logged in, followers, mutuals, only me)
Has a DM system
Posts have Commentable, Rebloggable, NSFW toggle
Can post MANY images on a single post
Readmore feature for long posts
Robust tagging system
Robust filtering system: hide or click-through warning (by installing Tassel userscript only)
Customizable profile colors, Light/Dark mode for whole website
Communities you can follow/join for shared interests
You can filter posts on profile by tag
You can filter posts on profile by "original poster" or "reblog"
Cons:
wonky image uploader, cannot upload multiple images at once
Cannot search for multiple tags at once
Search for terms with periods in them is currently broken (ex. "D.Gray-man" will not yield any search results)
Communities have few moderation features atm
Without Tassel installed the filtering system is pretty garbage atm (you can either show or hide nsfw or filtered tags completely, with no click-through warnings)
No multiple account/side blog feature yet
Some inline image formatting options are broken atm
Default endless scrolling
No progressive web app for mobile atm
For a more in depth explanation of PF's UI and features you can check out this official post.
Here are some images of the UI.
---
Cohost
Overview::
Cohost feels like it has a small artist/fandom userbase at the moment. However, to make up for that it has a pretty slick UI, it works great as a progressive web app on mobile, and it recently implemented an ASK system similar to tumblr's! Everything loads pretty quickly, and you can switch between your "latest posts" feed and your "bookmarked tags" feed. You can access your likes as a bookmark system, but as a whole "notes" and engagement numbers except for comments are not visible anywhere (this is wonderful for my personal mental health). It has a simple post editor and though the image uploader only allows 4 images that will load with lightbox, there's a workaround to upload MANY inline images if you want. The catch is you'll need to use a bit of markdown or html to do that. (more on that below) Though you can't personalize your profile colors, you can add personality to your page by making very cool pinned posts and adding images to your sidebar.
Pros:
Animated avatars! (listen i like having my animated komui icon)
You can make multiple "pages" (blogs) which function independently for comments/asks. switching between pages is effortless
Ask system, with anon toggle (you cannot reply privately atm tho)
2 Factor Authentication
Progressive web app for mobile works like a charm
You can preview your post before you post it
Posts have a NSFW toggle and you can save drafts
Can post MANY images in a single post (bit of a workaround as you'll need to upload your images to a draft first and then add them to a new post with some markdown or html code)
Readmore feature for long posts
Robust tagging AND filtering system (show, click-through, hide completely), plus CW system to give your posts additional click through warnings you deem necessary
You can do incredibly cool things with HTML and inline CSS on your posts
You can filter posts on profile by tag, and you can have pinned tags
Toggles for hiding reblogs, replies, and asks on profiles
Paginated browsing instead of endless scrolling (things load faster)
No engagement numbers visible ANYWHERE
Cons:
Image uploader does not let you upload multiple images at once. Limit to 4 images (can upload more as inline images with code)
Advanced post formatting (ex. bold, italics, bullet list, inline images etc.) has to be done through markdown or html + css which is not the friendliest for those who don't know any code (there's a button for a markdown cheatsheet when you post tho!)
No dark mode, or customizing profile colors atm (however there are workarounds to changing site colors with Stylus extension)
Cannot search for multiple tags at once
Cool things you can do with CSS on your posts might look very bad on mobile
Since you can do some crazy things with CSS on posts, you might come across eye straining visuals and movement on some posts. There are settings to tone this down, and people are pretty good about tagging things, so with some good filtering you should be able to avoid this however.
A little quieter on the artist/fandom front (but we can change that)
Here are some images of the UI.
If you made it to the end of this review thanks for giving it a look! If there's something vital you might want to know that I missed in regards to UI and posting features let me know and I will try to answer. But again, this is not a technical/security issues/bugs review so don't ask me about that.
Lastly, I've been seeing a handful of NSFW artists I follow on twitter hopping on bluesky. I REALLY suggest you do a little research on the owners and platform to see if you think joining is worthwhile, since I have a feeling many artists might not want their alternative to be a site owned by crypto advocates (and also a billionaire). Some basic research will get you there. Just take heed and use your best judgement. On that note Cohost is strictly against crypto (I'm guessing PF might be too but I don't have a link that I can point you to confirming this atm).
I believe community driven and supported platforms are the way to go. If you end up thinking either of these two places are worth your time, do consider getting your friends and favorite artists on board or supporting them! You'll get added perks on both platforms if you become a supporter. PF recently added the ability to have MULTIPLE AVATARS (PFPs I think they're called nowadays) which I think is super cool (i really miss that from LJ days).
Again, thanks for reading and I hope to see some of you there!
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Kink Factory
"Before you know it, you'll be my very own customized girl."
Pairing. Camboy!Donghyuck X Innocent!Reader ft boyfriend!Chenle and frat boy! Jaehyun
Summary. Your interest in fulfilling an 'active' life with your boyfriend Chenle- peeks high when you get recognition from an online infamous cam boy, Lee Donghyuck who compliments your granny panties. Taking the biggest risk of your life, you sign up behind your boyfriend's back to be a play thing all in the name of making him happy.
Genres. Angst. playboy meets innocent girl. vanilla girl becomes exotic. heartbreak
Warnings. Kinks mentioned (cuffs, nipple play, cunt play, bdsm). Smut (awkward/vanilla, rough positions, crying, dry humping, crampie). Caution (corrupt human behavior, degradation, non fluttering words)
Kink Factory: [Part 1] [Part2]
------------------------------------------------------------
Welcome to Kink Factory.
°Sign up
°Login
•Submit CV
→Exit
You have selected: Submit CV
CV loading...
✓CV sent!
•Review CV
→Exit
Reviewing CV...
Process 1 of 7...
Process 2 of 7...
Process 7 of 7...
✓ Background check complete.
Thank you for taking your time in setting up your accounting and submitting your CV! We will get back to you in 10 days with verification check!
•Login
→Exit
Logging in...
Welcome [Sweet Girl Y/N]! We are thrilled to have you back!
Remember: Coming back to our site helps us help you have a better sex life. Our cam boys and gals are always eager and ready to show you how satisfactory your sex life can be. So: Have fun while exploring! Mingle and get to know our hot sexy camboys and camgals! And remember shhhh! Don't tell your partner where you got the tricks from. It's our little secret. ; )
°Add photo
°Attach to bank
•Skip
→Exit
Homepage...
Check out the lastest update from your favourite kinky links!
° [TY Track] uploaded a kinky video 24 minutes ago. Check it out!
° [xxxNanaxxx] relied to an exotic feed. Join chat!
° [Jae_Peaches] joined with [American Suh] in a crazy hot video. Don't miss out!
° [Yang^²] wants to know who's free tonight xxx! Are you in his area?!
• [Sexy Sun] started a live 4 minutes ago. Join now!
° Celebrate with [Baby Maknae] who's no longer a Maknae!
° [Fine China] updated his relationship to: *ready to mingle.* Are you looking for a Sugar Daddy?
Redirecting you to live...
[Sexy Sun] Live now!
"- so mad right now. But there's nothing I can do." The camboy, Sexy Sun says while fapping softly on his manhood. He groans and goes a bit slower. "I know you guys are gonna get mad since you subscribed to my cam because I fuck old women, but ever since Cammy retired, my network has been fucked. They keep giving me this other old hag who I've collaborated with and I'm tired of her. She runs her mouth too much, sucks dick way too hard, her moans are annoying, and to top it all off... She's so saggy, way too old for my liking and used. And I get people like that kind of fucked up shit, old lady with hot young male- but I've had it up to here with it. I don't want to stick my dick anywhere near her. I was in her once and got so sick for a week. Like why can't they just give me another old hag- I'd honestly take anyone else then her." Sexy Sun looks intensely into the camera now letting go of his hard, thick and throbbing dick. He smirks and places his finger on the tip of his slit- teasing himself. "Comment section is full of shit right now, but I'm so hard it doesn't even affect me. If you fucking think you can sink into old sagging vagina be my guest and submit your CV."
Comments:
- me! *Sends 60pts!
- bro suck it up- she's more flexible then any other 80 year old!
- Can't understand a word he's saying but he's so hot rn while being frustrated and rubbing his cock asfgshj!!!
- you're so ungrateful! Do you know how many young man are out there wanting to be in your position?
- I wouldn't mind being your mamma, let me see you tease yourself more *Sends 100pts!
- I paid for content I want to see, so wank it out you'll be fine. Fuck, cum already. *Sends 100pts!
You instantly shut your phone when hearing the bathroom door open up. Hiding your phone underneath your pillow, you sit up watching your boyfriend, Chenle leave the bathroom in nothing but white boxers and a white shirt with his glasses on. With an excited grin plastered over his face, he hurries over to the bed with hopeful eyes. You smile warmly looking away shyly when he sits on the side of your bed his eyes moving all over your body.
Dressed in his favorite baby blue night silk night gown, his eyes travel down your figure landing on your knees where the silk ends. He gets up with an eager and excited smile on his face. "Are you ready?" He smiles wiggling his eyebrows in anticipation.
Feeling shy, you nod your head failing to hide your own excitement and thrill. It's been approximately 3 weeks and 4 days since you last had intercourses with your boyfriend. And right now you can't help but feel needy for him.
He angle your back while he gets on top of you by trapping your thighs in between his legs.
"Can I hold onto your hips?" He asks for permission. You eagerly nod your head. His face warms up into a light shade of red, just as his hands get jittery he lets out a little laugh. Like usual, his hands hesitantly hold onto your hips and then awkwardly his hands run up and down your bare thigh. He loved feeling your thighs just as much as he liked laying on them. Your thighs weren't thick, but they weren't skinny either, they had the perfect amount of meat and just the right amount of smoothness. Your skin was pampered and felt just like a baby's bottom, and despite having a bit of hairy legs, or some marks here and there or even light stretch marks, Chenle adored your body to the fullest.
Which is why as he roams his hands around your thighs, he whispers out how much he loves your body.
With your permission, he bends both your knees watching attentively as your silk dress rides up your thighs revealing your baby blue underwear. You bite your lip placing your hand over your mouth as your fingers play with your lips. Chenle's hands are a bit naughty and spread your legs wider giving him a better view of your glory. His fingers press onto your core and you jolt a little. It's a little too fast but that doesn't stop you from squirming a little. He starts stroking at your opening through your underwear and smiles when looking up to you. He's quick in getting off the bed and kneeling down on his knees using 3 fingers to rub the material roughly against your clitoris. Having a better view from his angle his mouth adjures and he sticks his tongue out being hypnotized by the sight. He removes his glasses allowing them to rest and be embraced by his slightly curly hair.
You 'ha' and 'mh' and grind your hips lightly against his fingers loving as he rubs your knob in a blissful circular motion with all three of his fingers. He sniffs and fumbles his hands down his boxers playing with his own possession as it jerks on it's own. "You're getting wet." Chenle marvels.
He was always amazed at how beautiful your body looked. You never failed to amaze him. It's one thing to see you naked but another thing entirely to see you like this, clothed but squirming in delight because of him.
There seems to be an ego boost he feels when pleasing you like this. Chenle knew that he was off the spectrum of manly man. All the boys on campus had a form and build to them that automatically made them desirable, yet for some reason people like himself were known as nerds. And as nerds are known, it was impossible for them to get laid. But Chenle hit the jackpot when he found himself another 'nerdy' friend who ended up becoming his girlfriend.
You and Chenle had been dating ever since you found each other- that would be the beginning of the school year. And maybe your relationship with him wasn't as deep as you wanted it to be, but your relationship was good enough for both of you to benefit from things you've both wanted to experience.
You were both inexperienced when it came to many things that had boundaries, but you both tried them out as a way to not miss out on anything. You were the type of awkward couple to get shy with displaying your feelings publicly in front of other people, yet when you were alone with him you both watched porn and tried to mimic the actions shown in the videos. You were both smart in your own modules and courses, yet when it came to other things such as being young adults you both knew nothing- and so the beauty of your relationship was how the both of you were figuring things out with each other.
And tonight is no different, when you feel a bubbling feeling erupting in your stomach from the waves of pleasure- you gasp out loud when you feel your body tingle in pleasure. "That was so good," You comment out in tiny and Chenle nods his head with wide eyes.
"Next time we can try to make you squirt,"
You nod your head excitedly. He gets up from the floor and positions himself in front of you. Awkwardly removing his boxers, your eyes are firmly on his shaft and hard manhood- he places a condom on it and you open your legs a bit wider. He removes your underwear leaving them by your knees and then he directs his member into your wet core. You moan a little just from the way it slips inside you.
Aside from you and Chenle trying out everything together- and respectfully you were both each others firsts, there always seemed to be something wrong when you both got to this stage. The stage were he'd insert his manhood in you. You don't know why he never put it in fully, or why it was suddenly small and only filled a portion of your entrance but aside from that you always thought something was wrong.
It would always slip right in due to your wet core, but the problem occurred when he began rocking his hips. You didn't feel any pleasure, at all. But instead you just felt like you were warming his cock while he arched his back and breathed aloud while humping. He humped but nothing was moving down there- and just before you know it, he'd remove his penis and quickly cum in the rubber protection while you faked a moan.
Always he'd be too happy and tired and then he'd take some tissue and wipe on your core (from your own previous juices) and he cleaned himself up before you got into bed and slept.
However this time, this night you don't sleep. You wait for him until he's fast asleep and he doesn't feel you slipping from his arms as you make your way to the bathroom.
Sneaking to the bathroom you pull out your phone and slide down the wall. Unlocking your phone, you're met with the blank screen of Sexy Sun's ended live. You take in a deep breath and click on his profile. You're hesitant to send a message- however when the events of today roll up in your mind you can't help but feel motivated to send him a message.
After all he did think you had cute granny panties.
[Earlier flashback]
You were walking to your next class, when something foul happened. A group of boys all running past you purposely pushed your books to the ground while others lifted up your dress and making it tangle under your armpits. Gasping in horror as they ran away, you tried to force your dress down, but it was just too hard- eventually it got down and you felt embarrassed by the on lookers who were snickering and laughing quietly.
Jerks.
You thought to yourself.
Panting hard, your cheeks grow red from the passing crowd that giggle within themselves. Adjusting the glasses on your face you squat all the way down to get your things, trying to move just as fast to not get interrupted or be late for your class.
Getting to class by a few minutes late, you reside on the backseat level that's far from the rest of the class present in the auditorium. Your shoulders are sunken down, your mood dropped to one of despair. Oh my goodness that was so embarrassing. How many people where there? How many people saw?
You're so deep in your thoughts that you don't notice the figure that approaches you in your backseat. With the way you're thinking so deeply, it takes a loud thud to snap you out of your head and into reality. You jump lightly when you finally take note of the figure. However, your eyes enlarge just as you blink multiple of times.
"You dropped these," Donghyuck, the notorious popular camboy that Chenle liked watching stands beside you. He moves behind you before taking a seat right next to your chair. Turning to you, he's got a smirk on his lips. You're in awe and feel your breath leaving your body.
The way that Donghyuck moves is… mesmerizing. You can't help but watch him with fascination, the way he's moving like the wind. It's almost like there's nothing holding him down. You can see his lips begin to move yet you don't hear anything- and you physically slap yourself to get yourself to focus as you look away from Donghyuck.
Donghyuck who's never fazed by anything, gets stunned when seeing you slap yourself. His playful smirk gets on his face when he insinuates that you were probably zoned out and slapped yourself to focus. The lecturer begins to teach but Donghyuck (who doesn't even belong to this class) scoots his seat closer to yours feeling mischievous.
You notice that the books he placed on your table were the ones that fell when those hooligans' dropped your books. Too afraid to turn to him, you feel your entire being freeze when feeling heat by your side and suddenly his lips are close to your ears giving your warmth as he whispers. "I liked your panties."
You're stuck with your eyes wide open just as your breath hitches in your throat.
"Cute granny panties." He chuckles lowly loving how tense you become. "I'll pay you enough money to take them off,"
"Wha-" You start but he places one finger over your mouth effectively shutting you up and making your cheeks burn hot under his touch. He doesn't stop laughing lowly as he removes a fold piece of paper note money and places it on your desk.
"Fuck your hot," He whispers, his hand going over his covered pants. "Take off your panties, I want them,"
You don't say anything, instead your breathing tries to stay calm as you witness him palming himself.
"Come on baby, give them,"
You don't know what possess you to do it, but looking at the money on your desk, you feel hot and bothered and you nervously reach up underneath your dress and place your finger tips by the starting line of your panties. You slowly slide them, lifting your butt up a little to further pull them down. No one ever notices you in the backseat of the class, so you're not too worried of being caught, however you are worried that as your panties are coming off you'll be left exposed.
Shifting them and removing them off your legs, you shut your legs when you see your peach panties in his grasp. Shamelessly he places them against his face and sniffs on them. He inhales sharply while his other hand on his bulge continues to palm excessively. "You smell amazing," He whispers in your ear, stopping himself from sniffing. He places your panties in his leather jacket pocket and he stops palming himself.
Your eyes are surprised by that large imprint of his bulge and you clear your throat trying to look away.
"I've got a cam in Kink Factory, hit me up if you want your panties back," Donghyuck whispers eagerly looking into your blushed face. "I go by the name of sexy sun. While you're at it, send me a dm and send in your cv. I'd love to smell you more,"
[End of flash back.]
As soon as he left the class you remember how wet you were from the bizarre encounter with him. Not only did Donghyuck notice you, but he took your underwear and personally invited you to send him a message.
Not knowing if he'll remember you, you try to keep your message brief.
Sweet girl Y/n:
Hi. You took my panties today in class.
You're not surprised by how long you have to wait for him to send you back a message, but when he does you feel yourself feeling wide awake even though you were tired.
Sexy Sun:
Gotta be more specific girly.
I take everyone's panties
You feel yourself blushing a little by his text. Nervously you bite your lip and type again.
Sweet girl Y/n:
You said I had cute granny panties
You're surprised that as soon as the message is sent, you get a quick reaction and reply.
Sexy Sun:
Oh, my babygirl
Video call?
Your eyes widen again but you're too slow to react when just within a short second you see his icon pop up as he requests a video call. You rapidly jolt up silence the volume, getting up you run to your bed side and pick out your earphones before sprinting back to the toilet and shutting the door behind you.
You quickly answer before physically slapping yourself that you forgot to check your background.
Donghyuck upon your connection chuckles lightly when seeing you slap yourself. "My baby loves getting slapped, doesn't she?" He's drinking from a wine glass and his background is a bit dim then when he was in the live.
You clear your throat before brushing your hand behind your hair. "Hi, and no,"
"You sure about that?" Donghyuck snickers when your face grows red. He runs his thumb across his bottom lip taking his time to look at you. "How come I don't know you?"
"Hm?" You don't know how to answer, so you bite your lip. "I don't know,"
Donghyuck zooms the camera out of his face, before positioning it someplace. "I'll cut to the chase baby girl, I love your underwear. You've got a perfect ass and you smell fucking amazing. Wanna be my cam girl?"
You're like a dear caught in headlights when staring at the screen. Donghyuck- you hold your breath when by the view of his camera you can see him sliding his pants down and his hard member springs up. His hands are out of the frame before you make out him pouring some lube on his hands before they go down his shaft.
"Be my cam girl babygirl," He jerks off right before your very eyes and you gulp while squeezing your legs shut feeling something.
Tagged along together with Donghyuck's grunts of pleasure and the sight so wholesome of himself masturbating has you cooing like a little girl and squeezing your legs shut.
"You'd be the luckiest girl if I get to touch your pretty little pussy everyday and make it mine." He mutters just as you hear his fapping becoming louder. "Don't you want that? To be used by me?"
"But I have a boyfriend," Your voice suddenly finds reason to come out.
Donghyuck shrugs his shoulders. "So what? I wanna fuck you up. You're fucking hot, shit. My fans would love you. You look like a virgin, are you a virgin? Actually don't tell me, I don't care if you have a boyfriend I want to fuck you up so badly that you'll go back to your daddy broken and only thinking of me,"
You don't know how to respond to his passive aggressive statement yet the sight of him edging himself while closing tightly onto his penis has you weak and bothered that you can't even keep your eyes on his face but they're only on manhood.
"You'll get paid twice if you tag together with me," He moans throwing his head back when reaching a specific spot. "My partner was the best I'd ever ask for but then she got betrothed. So I need a partner to fill up her position,"
"I don't know how to be a cam-"
Donghyuck shakes his head tilting it to the side while gazing at you. It hits you that he's using you as you're watching him as a means to get off. Just from his hazy eyes to his parted lips from time to time, you feel shy knowing he's peering at you with those eyes. "All you have to do, is be pretty," His voice is husky and his body begins to shudder. He lets out a repeated stream of curses. "Fuck, fuck, fuck!"
Your eyes enlarge when he combusts and comes undone in the spot. There's semen shooting in every direction, others fly out the frame, others land on his clothes and some lucky bits land on the camera making you feel some way. You bite your lip and your heart heaves in your chest. You shouldn't have been watching him get off but it was so addicting.
"Look what you made me do, pretty girl," He smirks wiping the camera and resting on his seat after partially cleaning himself up.
You have no words, only except you can't stop squeezing your legs by the pool patching on your underwear. "My boyfriend has never done that," You meekly say when Donghyuck runs his hand over his hair. "How can I do that to him?"
"How can he jerk off?" Donghyuck quizzes with a mocking tone. "Babygirl a man who can't please himself, can't please you. How would you rate your sex life with your partner? Assuming you're not a virgin,"
You take in a sharp breath as your eyes wonder around.
"After cumming, do you guys go for another round?"
Your eyes enlarge by that question. Never. After a minute or so- when Chenle is done he tugs you in his arms and you both sleep.
Unfortunately your silence and Bambi stare into the unknown is all the answers he needs to know your boyfriend is not satisfying you.
"How many times does he make you squirt?"
The question evokes another surprise reaction from you making Donghyuck snicker. "Babygirl by the looks of it you're still a virgin. Whatever the fuck your boyfriend is doing isn't working. How about this," Donghyuck's eyebrow perks up as his eyes move to your chest again. It's what got him hard the first time, you're in a silk dress that exposes much skin - almost as if you wanted to tempt him in soft baby colors. You were so adorable like a rabbit and he felt like a snake about to ravish your innocence. "You be my camgirl and I'll show you some tricks to spice up your sex life with your boyfriend,"
In response to his offer you gulp and breathe in and out before slightly nodding.
And that right there is your stamp on a sealed envelope of your involvement with Donghyuck.
-
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Sexy Sun
Following: 68 kinks | Followers: 82k kinkers
Subscribers: 12k | Cam Posts: 45 videos
* Bio: Technician by day, college student by afternoon, fuckboy by night
* Gender: I was born a baby boy, I'm a husky male now
* Interested in: I like my females old
* Tip: Tip me with money and points
* Kinks: Sky's the limit
* Perks: Not sure how to answer this;fast hips;can make you cum more than three times
* Earnings: I wish I was cheap but I weigh over
→ ¥70 per video
→ ¥30 one night per chat
→ ¥100: full subscription
Stay for as long as you like, chat with me, tease me, because by morning I'll be gone and it'll all be a dream and I'll be in my condo working on my machines
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Format: Review CV
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Name: Y/n
Username: Sweet girl Y/n
Interested in: Man
What are you looking for: To fulfill my sexual life with my partner by watching and learning from camboys and camgals
What are your goals: To please my partner
Are you in a relationship: Yes
Perks: Innocent
Do you think you're attractive: It depends
Do you have kinks: I'm not sure
Why do you want to be a cam kinker: Because I want to learn how to please my boyfriend
Who recommended you: Sexy Sun
What's your budget (or preferred budget): ¥10
Are you aware this placement is a fixed and permanent position: Yes
Are you aware you'd need to be working from late hours: Yes
Would you mind revealing parts of your body: No
Have you had intercourse publicly: No
Have you played with yourself on cam: No
Do you take nudes: No
Do you realize there's a possibility of your pictures getting leaked: Yes
Hence are you comfortable with your pictures getting leaked: No
Are you comfortable commuting to placement areas: Yes...but it will depend where it'll be
Last question, are you ready to be used like a filthy toy: ...
CV Status: @ Pending @ Rejected @ Accepted
Reviewing your answers to your CV sent to Donghyuck, you wonder if you answered the questions well. To be fair you answered honestly to the best of your abilities, so you just hope he'll be pleased. Closing your phone again for the umpteenth time you try to pay attention to Chenle as you're both seated on some steps while eating your lunch.
"They said if we're lucky we'll write the Pre merits papers by next week." Chenle drones out about a curriculum in his course. You can hardly stay focused as you curiously pick up your phone again to see if you've been selected.
Of course Donghyuck said he wanted you, but he always said you should send your CV to him and he'd have to line you up against other possible options. While he masturbated and spoke to you, you had a feeling as if he was testing you and your skills. You don't know if you passed that round, but if you didn't then you were hoping that your CV would boost you up. In all honesty, you felt somewhat special because a playboy infamous camboy recognised you and said you were hot.
From who else were you going to hear that from? You had no friends in this college, you only had Chenle and 3 years have passed since you joined. No one seemed interested in you and when you tried branching and reaching out to other people you felt scared of being rejected. It's happened so many times that you just didn't want to experience it anymore. So being with Chenle is refreshing, however upon capturing the attention of another guy (a hot guy) you wanna make sure that he's still in your lane.
Yet when you check your phone and see that your status hasn't changed you sigh.
"What's wrong babe?" Chenle's concerned voice pips and you switch off your phone hiding it from his view.
"Nothing," You cooly let it pass, but attempt to get some answers from him. "Chenle, am I hot?"
His eyes shinning like crystals is all it takes for you to smile genuinely. You loved Chenle's expressions and features. "Are you kidding me? You're gorgeous and incredibly beautiful. Just me being next to you makes me feel insecure by your beauty, every time you smile you make me question whether the sun is near- because you make me blush and make me feel hot and make me blind. Baby you're so much more than just the word hot, you're magnificent,"
Your smile revealing your faint dimples enlightens his mood and he carefully leans in and presses his lips on yours. You're attentive and equally press your lips against his. Chenle shyly backs away and timidly looks to his food carrying on eating while you do the same.
You guys were always afraid of displaying affection in front of people, afraid that they might tease or make fun of you both. However other times you couldn't help it.
For Donghyuck who was casually walking to the canteen with his friend pauses upon seeing you...and your boyfriend kiss. His face morphs in distaste. "What the fuck was that?" He questions being partly traumatized by that vanilla kiss. "And they're fucking blushing like kindergartens,"
"That's one hell of an awkward kiss." Jeno, Donghyuck's friend, chuckles before he nudges his friend. "Come on, let's go,"
Donghyuck shakes his head redirecting his feet. After what he witnessed he simply can't act like he never saw that. "No bro, I'll catch you later,"
"What?" Jeno's eyebrow raises when Donghyuck begins striding to the couple. "Man where are you going?"
Donghyuck rounds his finger signalling Jeno to go on without him. While he jogs up lightly the few steps, he doesn't pay mind to the girls that twiddle their fingers or try to get his attention. Because as he's making his way towards you, he knows in his mind that you're the chosen one.
Upon getting your CV, Donghyuck was not that much interested in you because of your boring, plain, devoted answers, and comments about your boyfriend here and there, so he ignored your CV rather then send an official rejection. It's been days, but yet upon witnessing that mediocre kiss and how you looked satisfied by it -perked up his interest slightly.
You really were innocent. And he wanted to change that, or rather ruin it. Perhaps he sees it as a challenge of trying to change a shy girl, but really the kiss your boyfriend gave you made Donghyuck want to please you. It was a crime for pretty girls to blush like kids. What you needed was to feel flattered non stop all day everyday. And if your boyfriend wouldn't do a good job then surely he'd step in.
Getting closer to you, his eyes are on your bare legs. Surely you had hypnotizing legs, he could make out some blemishes and bandages, but he loved how full they looked. You're wearing a dress but it ends on your thigh and Donghyuck takes advantage by coming up behind you placing his hands on your shoulders shaking you a little. You turn your head backwards taking notice of him. Your eyes widen when he taps your nose. "Hey babygirl,"
Both you and Chenle are frozen in shock. Chenle is shocked that a camboy he's been admiring is close by and you're shocked because of the name he calls you as well as how he slaps your thigh lightly watching it shake. He squats right before you with a smile.
"This your boyfriend?" Donghyuck peers at Chenle once before focusing back on you. Your features, your look of pure. You're too innocent for him and he finds it alluring. "I've got your underwear in my car. Come with me,"
He gets up after taking your hand in his. He gently pulls you close to him making you go down one step, before his head leans forward to check your backside and brushes your butt from where you were sitting. You're alarmed by having his hands tap and dust your butt- so stunned that you can't form words with your mouth.
Chenle too is left with his mouth agape as he watches Donghyuck pull you away. "She'll be back,"
Donghyuck, with little to no regard or respect for personal space or boundaries throws his arm around your shoulder.
"Alright babygirl, I'll be frank with you," Donghyuck starts while walking with you underneath his arm. "I rejected you because you weren't my type. But now, I want you. I think we can make something work. I'm thinking a rebranding of my page. You're not shabby looking and you've got goods in all the right places, so I'm seeing you as my innocent camgirl and in return I teach you what youwant to know, what do you think?"
Normally your mouth was a bit tongue tied when it came to talking to people, but you struggled with answering questions on the spot. Especially with this type of topic. Not only is it too much to process, but you don't understand to the fullest. "Hm?" You answer feeling dumb and wanting him to repeat himself.
Donghyuck only chortles but doesn't repeat himself. "Let's meet the gang first, and then we can see what to do,"
Again you don't know what to say, but when Donghyuck directs you to a place on campus grounds that you avoided with passion because of the types of people who'd loiter around there. The canteen. Your eyes widen when he pulls the glass door open and enters into the packed stations filled with students everywhere. He goes by a couple of groups nodding his head here and there as signs of greetings before he sprints up some stairs with you next to him.
"There you are," Jeno is the first to notice Donghyuck before the rest of his friends do.
Being seated on high stools by a rectangular table, you notice a total of 5 people all seated. There's drinks, bags, laptops and books on the table, but aside from the things on the table your face flushes completely when seeing all the faces of the men.
You notice one of them as the one who constantly pulls your dress over your head whenever he gets the chance. Jaemin.
And the rest of the guys you recognize them from the popular groups in the school. Two of them being the heartthrobs, frat boys Jaehyun and Mark. And the other guys, you don't know their names but you've seen them always around the popular guys.
"Guys, meet my rebranding camgirl," Donghyuck announces. His heat that's close to your back surprises you. His hands go either side of you before resting on the table trapping you in his arms. Your heart is pounding extremely fast and you have nowhere else to look except at the table when feeling all their stares on you.
"Fuck it's the girl with the granny panties," Your heart sinks when you hear Jaemin laugh. "You wanna make her your camgirl?"
"Donghyuck, this is what you went back for?" Jeno quizzes with his eyebrow up. "Really? You're gonna reject Crystal the pussy goddess for her?"
"She's good," You hear Donghyuck state. You can't see his face, but you can hear his playful smirk. "Hair, thighs, innocence. She's perfect for me to use. Like a fuckdoll."
Your ears are sharp to his words and you feel self conscious as he lists off your body parts like some items at an auction- as if he's selling you in a market.
"She looks timid," You glance up to one of the guy's who comments, Jaehyun. Your heart heaves in your chest. He's one of the seniors who studies construction.
"Exactly," Donghyuck's touch over your hips going down your thighs has your jolting slightly - making them snicker.
"She really squirmed by your touch, are you sure she's perfect?" Jeno questions with amusement while watching your nervous figure slightly quivering.
Donghyuck plants his hand on the top of your head running it down your soft hair. "Perfect for me because I can use this to my advantage. Innocent face brings money."
"I feel you," Mark smirks. "You wanna pollute her? That'll make good money and bring in a fresh audience for you."
One of the guys who hasn't spoken sighs and turns to you. "Did you agree to this whole claptrap?"
You're about to respond but unfortunately Donghyuck beats you to it. "Our agreement was that if she helps me I can help her bring something new to the table for her boyfriend. Renjun, you should've seen him, he's all squirmy and kissed her like it's a PG 8 movie. By the time I'm done with her, she'll be a freak. Her boyfriend will be satisfied to be dealing with a little girl who knows her shit. Don't you wanna be a freak babygirl?"
Your eyes lightly pop and just as you gasp in astonishment when he slaps your butt. The sound echo's around making the guys whistle. "Fuck, you should share her," You hear Jaehyun in between the other boys.
"Well I don't know about sharing, but this is my account on the line," Donghyuck states before pulling another stool. "Sit babygirl, Renjun what do you think? How can we market her?"
The guy who asked you if you agreed, types of on his laptop before turning to Donghyuck. "I'm not too thrilled with doing non consent marketing, but if she really wants we can make something work. At least it's not that old baggage anymore. My parents were beginning to wonder if I was sleeping with my grandma," The guy, Renjun grumbles before turning to you. "Are you in?"
You're sat uptight on the chair with eyes so large that it makes Donghyuck amorous and aroused. He couldn't already wait to use you and have you look at him with those eyes.
Hesitantly you nod your head and look down when hearing them howl and whistle again. Your neck and face is on fire just as your legs tightly shut. One comment throws you off guard but you try not to feel like a dirty cheater. "Wait you said she had a boyfriend? And she still wants to do this? With you?" Jeno shakes his head scoffing. "Not so innocent if you ask me,"
You haven't cheated yet, but the way they're discussing this like it's some big project has you feeling vulnerable and exposed. Even though the bell rings, you expect them to move but they're still in one place discussing how to use your image. Literally they create a whole report file for this new rebranding Donghyuck has in mind. They take in your information and Kink Factory account details and begin working. All of them.
Renjun types and creates strategies, while Mark gives 'scenarios' of what Donghyuck can do, with Jaemin adding in what types of kinks for Donghyuck to market and try out. As it's a whole 'new field' Jeno offers his expertise on how Donghyuck can use toys to bring up your best performances.
Meanwhile, your heart is hauls in your chest when you feel a stare coming from Jaehyun. One of the frat boys. He's eyes are scanning you up and down. Scanning you like meat ready to be eaten. Just as you think he won't make a move, he picks up a clipboard and pen.
"I'll measure her portions and cups," With Jaehyun getting off his chair and moving over to you, he lifts his hand waiting for you to take it. "Come on Princess,"
You're fragile when placing your hand in his large ones and get off your stool following him. You walk behind him while his hand holds onto yours as he leads you to some place. Going down the steps and walking past a few passages, you find him opening up a storage closet. He gets inside and you drag behind him being cautious.
Turning on the lights you see indeed that it's a storage closet with sets of mops and brooms and other cleaning machines sitting in the corner and there are shelves with cleaning products and racks of materials. Jaehyun locks the door and smiles when turning to you. "Alright let's check you out,"
You move back a bit when he steps forward. He halts when sensing that you're uneasy. "Don't worry, I'm just gonna check you out. I won't do anything you don't want me to do."
You don't know what to make of it. But you nod your head.
He takes out a tape measure and peers at you. "Stand against the wall,"
You follow and stand against the wall. Using one of the appliances on the shelves he places a straight ruler over your head before lining it off with a pencil. He's taller then you, so as he's up close to you measuring you, you can smell all of him in his mind capturing smell. After getting your height he measures it and then jots it down on the clip file.
He then cracks his knuckles surpassing his smile. "Ayt, the next part is a bit physical. I'll need you to stay still alright?"
You nod again.
Standing right in front of you. His large hands cup your cheeks. "Don't be nervous," He whispers. And carefully, his hands slide down to your neck and down lower.
Your chest rises and falls when his hands cup your boobs, and his hands lift up your slightly heavy boobs before squeezing them. Upon squeezing them a few more times, you're alert when his fingers slide up your shoulder handles and slide them down.
"Don't be nervous, I just wanna see how they look," he whispers. Your heart beats in your chest as the covering of your dress slowly falls and pools by your waist. Jaehyun's hands are skillful when removing your bra and tossing them aside. His eyes meet yours once before he smirks and his eyes go over your boobs. "They look good," His fingers play with your nipple by pinching them and pulling on them. He continues squeezing and lifting your breasts before he dips his head down and you shiver when his tongue swirls on your nipple.
You shudder as his other hand kneads on your other boob while he sucks and fills his entire mouth with your nipple. He moans and you shut your eyes in ecstasy laced in embarrassment. How are you letting this happen?
You don't know why, but it feels good and you can't help how little squeals leave your lips. That's music is Jaehyun's eyes as he peers up at you gladly before kissing up your chest and then he gets to your neck. You swear the moment his tongue circulates on your neck that your knees feel weak. His teeth sink into your neck as he plants sloppily and wet kisses tagged with bites that make you implore in pleasure. His tongue skillfully gnawing on that one spot that makes you fidget as you try to keep your eyes close by how good it feels.
Jaehyun parts from your neck and hums out. "Good," He picks up the file and ticks off some points writing down a few comments about your soft pleasing moans.
Then he picks up your bra and helps you put it on. You're even nervous when he helps put on your dress properly. Just as you think you're done, he kneels down on one knee and carefully his hands go up your thighs. Your legs feel tingles from his touch and you try to maintain your breath, only for it to be taken away again when he pulls his head underneath your dress. You cup your mouth trying to remain still as you feel his hands now pressing onto the flesh of your butt.
Jaehyun's hands knead on your ass as his nose basks in the scent of your wet underwear.
It takes just a moment for Jaehyun to pull your underwear down before his two fingers slide between your pussy lips. "You're a hairy little girl, it's been a while,"
You feel self conscious by his comment when his fingers continue to lubricate with your juicy juices. Already squirming and letting out tiny whimpers of pleasure, you're not expecting for his fingers to throttle right up your whole. But when it does you try to close your legs but Jaehyun's hand acts on it with a laugh and he tosses one of your leg above his shoulder to give him better access to your slippery wetness.
You're a trembling mess as the squelching sounds echo in the storage closet as well as your loud moans. "Mmmmh," You squeeze your eyes close trying to hold in your moans, but you can't help the sounds of bliss leaving you. You're in a euphoric state and on cloud 9 when Jaehyun adds in another finger stretching your walls to open up a little more.
How could this be so good? How could his fingers be more satisfying then Chenle's crotch? It shouldn't be possible but yet with the way your throat is jubilating in praises makes you wish for this to never end.
However when you legs start to tremble from the build up tagged together with the way Jaehyun moves his fingers in and out in a haste manner- you can't hold in any more of your sobs of pleasure as your hands finally grip onto his head underneath your dress as you push your pelvis more into his fingers- as you feel a wave of squirts shooting out of you.
Your legs can't stop shaking and your abdomen tightens in pleasure that you can't believe it.
Jaehyun gets out from underneath your dress with a face resembling surprise and perceiving in a cocky manner. You're too focused on the floor were your panty is being drenched by the wetness of the squirts that left you- that you don't notice Jaehyun placing his fingers in his mouth to taste you.
Despite smelling sweet, you taste a bit sour-yet Jaehyun wouldn't mind having to taste you. But considering it's his first time meeting you, he wouldn't want to risk anything, so as he licks his fingers clean and uses the hand sanitizer as well as a cloth to wipe his fingers, he ticks more on some boxes before bending down to pick up your underwear.
"I'm gonna keep this," He smiles and pats your back. "There's some tissues in the blue box. When you're done you can go back to your boyfriend, Donghyuck will send you a message,"
And with that he leaves you panting for air and marveling at the revelation that your body fluids just shot right out of you. That was the best experience you've ever had in under minutes and you're not even sure how you're able to stand. At the mere thought of standing, your legs give up on you and you fall to your knees panting out and shutting your eyes trying to relive the moment in your head.
"That was amazing," You breathe out while fixing your glasses.
Jaehyun goes back to his friends twirling your underwear on his index finger making Jaemin laugh. "Fuck they really are granny panties,"
"Thought I'd add this to my collection," Jaehyun states while taking a seat. "Smells amazing," Jaehyun tosses it in the air for Jaemin to grab.
Jaemin grabs onto it while stuffing his face on it. "Fuck, how does she taste,"
"Sour, but good," Jaehyun remarks. "Didn't get to eat her out. She got off from my fingers. Whoever her boyfriend is, he's never given it to her. She couldn't stop moaning,"
The boys read through the file that Jaehyun places on the table being amazed by how 'fresh', ‘untouched’ and ‘new’ you are. Mark reads through one of the tick boxes, 'Legs shake' and he turns to Donghyuck. "Did you know her legs shake?"
Donghyuck shakes his head reading through the messages on his phone from some of the thirsty girls who filled up his bank account. The only thoughts in his head is whether or not you could bring him enough money to pay off his debts.
"What made you even reject her?" Jeno asks.
"She has no personality," Donghyuck states. "But even with her legs shaking, she still has no personality, so we'll need things that'll make her pop. If we wanna grow her account to the same level as mine, she'd really need to have some kind of personality,"
"For what it's worth, her pussy is hairy." Jaehyun mentions. "Trimmed but hairy, and it looks fresh. She's never been used before. Her personality will be her pussy,"
-
20:00 pm.
You're finished submitting the last of your assignments months before the due date and rest back on your seat stretching your arms out. Today was a long and hectic day. You pick up your phone going into messenger. Chenle asked you to send him a text as soon as you finished. He sent the message around 2pm, but you know he's still waiting to talk to you. It almost like a night routine type of thing that you both did, if you did not sleep over at his house or he didn't sleep over at yours, then you'd engage by through text messages.
Surprisingly you chat with Chenle normally, talking about your assignments and his classes and everything else about you day except for the incident that happened between you and Donghyuck.
You take a breather, being relived that he doesn't bring it up...until he sends the message that's been on his mind: "Do you have time to talk about...something"
Thankfully just as the conversation is brought up, it's quickly dismissed and you feel relieved.
When you're done chatting with Chenle, you're about to go and sleep but then you hear your phone beeping nonstop. Picking it up, you're immediately taken aback by the number of notifications from Kink factory. Opening the app to make sure that you're not jinxing yourself, you see that indeed the notifications are for you indicating that you have some new followers.
[Jae_Peaches] followed you
[Sexy Sun] followed you
[xxxNanaxxx] followed you
[Nono] followed you
[Tongue in the game] followed you
[.R.] followed you
You recognize the first batch of people being from Donghyuck and his friend's group, but then there are 50 other new people who you're not familiar with and another batch of people you don't know. Curiously you peek into their accounts and are stunned that it's other hot males. You go through your profile again being in awe of the amount of new followers you have.
You and Chenle shared an account when watching pxrn from Kink Factory, and you both didn't pay mind to the profiles as you were only there to watch and not to engage. However when you created your own account you were left with 0 followers, but now all of a sudden, it's at a rocket high number of 153!
Innocent Baby Y/n
Following: 1 kink | Followers:153 kinkers
Subscribers: 6 | Cam Posts: 0 videos
You can't even comprehend how that is even possible. Not only do you have additional followers, but it seems that your page has been altered, because you don't remember placing a display photo or even any information on your account other than your name. But now, seeing your account, you're surprised by the alter ego personality from your account. Number one, the girl in the picture is not even you, or close to looking like you
You get an idea that perhaps it's Renjun or the group of guys who altered your account, otherwise it wouldn't be so pink and cute and colorful... No, it's certainly them who altered it.
* Bio: you don't even have to ask, the answer is always yes!💗
* Gender: 🤭female by day and kitten by night😺
* Interested in: filling all my wholes by a dominant male🤤
* Tip: i'm a shy innocent girl who loves sparkling things, cute things, delicious food. spoil me daddy, please🎀
* Kinks: breed me like your baby girl🥴i wanna be your baby so badly🥺
* Perks: i smell really good, and taste like pineapples- wouldn't you want to taste me🍍
* Earnings: i'm your cute and cheap little slut
→ ¥30 per night💲
Your hands hold onto your cozy and fluffy pajama pants as you read your about page. They've made you sound as though you're a horny child. A child who's lost their father and is in search for a new father.
Before you can further wrap your head around the situation you get a message.
Sexy Sun: Babygirl send me your address, I'm coming over
Your eyes enlarge as you reread over the message several of times.
What did you sign yourself into? Exactly what did you 'accept' for him to be all over your personal life almost invading it? You only gave your underwear and potentially your entire sex life, but this all feels too much. You get another message from him, saying how he doesn't like to be kept waiting.
Afraid of making him upset, you send your address and dorm number.
Sexy Sun: Oh you live in the college dorms? I'll be right over
Your eyes travel around your room, which is already clean and tidy and you wonder if you should prepare for him to come. Getting off your bed, you make your way to the bathroom and brush your hair, washing your face from the face mask you put over- before placing your glasses back on your face. Just as you're about to change your pajama's to normal clothes, you hear your door bell ringing.
Being reminded of how he doesn't like to wait, you quickly move over to the door and unlock it.
Donghyuck dressed in all black as usual, with that same leather jacket has his head down while holding onto a bag. You notice there's a cigarette bud dangling from the side of his lip. His head slowly moves up your figure, eyeing down your pants and grey sweat shirt. His eyes land on your pure and sinless eyes and he hums out. You're pretty. He tilts his head to the side giving you a little smile. "You weren't sleeping were you? It's work time,"
"Oh," You say with no courage, lacking your soul as your eyes light enlarge. "We start now?"
Donghyuck gently moves past your frame by the door and enters your dorm. He removes his shoes revealing his black socks and causally walks around. You hold in your breath when getting a whiff of his cigarette which smells so strong like caffeine Tabaco. He exhales and very soon once you close the door locking it, you feel congested by the scent and feeling almost frightened by his big large height in your room. You stand behind him as he moves around. "Your parents must be rich, you got the expensive suite. Indoor bathroom, living room and bedroom, wow, even a kitchen. I bet it even has an amazing balcony view." Donghyuck hums out impressed.
You don't know what to do as you follow behind him as he moves along the living room and to your room. The smell of his cigarette has you wishing it doesn't remain when he leaves- but it's too strong for you that you doubt even when he leaves it'll still be smelling.
As he anticipated, your room is just as minimalistic as your personality. It's in it's standard beige color and dull white colors of innocence. Damn you were an open book. Getting in your room, Donghyuck drops his bag on the ground while moving to the curtains which spread over two walls. He spreads them open and he feels relieved that there's some form of 'something' in your room. You lack vision and Donghyuck can't stand looking at the blank walls.
Even your study area is clear of any clutter. It's as though you're going to leave the building the next day, there's nothing around your room that screams any personality. Aside from the sensual and explicit outside night view, there's nothing else to look at in your room.
"This view is perfect," Donghyuck slides open a window letting the smoke air out. He turns back to you, watching you stand awkwardly in the middle of the room with your eyes on the white carpet. You had a long way to go if you had to take on the position to be his cam girl.
He'd need to change your style, give you some form of life that you could maintain and live up to, give you a personality and make you something...someone. Because as much as the shy girl innocent babe concept would take him far- he couldn't imagine spending a month with you and you had no flavor and were just dry.
He liked girls that were all over the place, he loved the wild fierce girls that surprised him every once in a while and he embraced those girls with open arms.
You needed to be up to his liking if he was going to take you far.
He moves over to his bag on the ground and splatters out all the things that were in his bag.
"Tonight, by your permission we can do something light. Kind of like an introduction and testing the waters with your appearance. The nice thing about your appearance has to be your glasses. They're not too small or too big, the fit perfectly on your face and enhance the mystical view of your eyes. Anyway, let me get these out,"
On the bed amongst the different colored teddy bears camera's and tripods and speakers, you're surprised to see baby blue lingerie as well as vibrators, dildo's, belts, collars, pacifier etc. that are used on pxrn movies. There's different types of them. "A-are you gonna use these? On me?" You timidly ask as you turn to him.
Donghyuck is too busy looking for an outlet to plug in his miniature speakers. Upon connecting them and setting up his phone, he moves over to the bed and takes a seat while picking up the camera and tripod. He nods his head in answering you. "In your cv you mentioned you're not comfortable with revealing parts of your body, so tonight we won't go too extreme. I wanna angle the camera in a way that it's mainly focused on your tits. Tonight, I'll only play with your tits. You good with that?"
Your lips are pressed tightly together but you find a way to nod your head despite not really digesting everything he said. Did he just mention tits? Aside from that you notice how much Donghyuck is different from when he is with his friends. He's more toned down instead of being bright and upbeat, he looks tired and worn out, but yet he's still willing to go this far with you, and if you dare even say he looks stressed- instead of looking relxd like he id with his friends...
"Be a doll and put this on," He navigates his eyes towards the lingerie. "Just wear it inside and then put back your pajama pants and top,"
You nod your head and pick up the garments that barely hide anything and are see through.
Donghyuck upon setting up the camera opens up his laptop and connects his charger as well as long USB cord to the camera. It begins showing the camera feed on his monitor screen and Donghyuck instantly logs into his account. He goes to create and as the camera switches on to the room, Donghyuck nods his head dragging in another whiff of smoke and opens another window opening a face time with Renjun. "Bro,"
"Damn, you were spot on." Renjun mutters. "Her room is bright."
"It's just walls and a bed and a table." Donghyuck mumbles and moves back placing his cigarette behind his ear. "Okay, how am I doing this?"
Renjun from his side takes a look at the room. "Give me a 360 view of the room,"
Donghyuck picks up the tripod turning around fully. "There's a full white wall of nothing and I think it irritates me more than anything,"
"Ditto," Renjun hums. "That background of the open curtains is really good. Try making it full, enhance the frame to focus on the both of you, yet the background should be highlighted as well.
Donghyuck after setting the camera in direct line with the bed and background moves to his laptop and adjusts the contrasts and saturation.
"That looks good," Renjun comments. "What deco did you bring?"
"Teddy bears and some dildos," That makes Renjun faintly laugh. Renjun was the type of person who hardly laughed at things, so hearing him laugh makes Donghyuck's ear perk up. "What's funny?"
"How'd she react to the dildos?"
"She asked if I'd use it on her," Donghyuck remarks while taking the teddy bears and placing them in the background. "Should I use it on her?"
Renjun shakes his head leaning back. "Jaehyun said she couldn't even handle his fingers, how would she even be able to handle your dildos. Play it cool Sunshine, it's just a showcase,"
Donghyuck sighs. "I can't afford for my subscribers, ratings and tips to go down. This needs to be the best showcase. I need the money,"
"You're all business talk, try not to get in your own head and enjoy the experience." Donghyuck hears Jaemin over Renjun's laptop. "I can't wait for it to start, I'll be tuning in. Make sure to make her squirt, Jaehyun said-"
Donghyuck rolls his eyes. "As if I'd need to learn how to pleasure a girl from you or Jaehyun. Let me remind you who's-"
"Ego aside, please don't get in your own head. Connect with her, and keep eye contact," Renjun interrupts before turning to his roommate. "Zip your mouth,"
Donghyuck continues enlightening your room trying to make it look minimalistic yet effortlessly girly. He did some research on girly rooms, and it seems the heart of all girly rooms was a light pink, white and brown teddy bear with hearts in their stomachs.
Thankfully the decorations of teddy's and dildos sit in well within the background of the night view. Donghyuck moves to the light switch wanting to turn the lights off, but when he sees there's a knob to dim the lights, he feels extremely glad. "Renjun check this out,"
Donghyuck dims the lights completely until their off before he brings back the light seeing that it can still go brighter. "Make the room dark," Renjun comments. "It makes the night city look hella fire,"
Donghyuck does as told before moving to the laptop and adjusting it. Still waiting on you, he moves to the closet hoping to find your wardrobe. He was hoping to find- perfect.
Meanwhile, you walk out your bathroom and into your room in the same clothes. Your eyes scan the area and you feel eager by the new decorations. There are multiples of teddy bears with different sizes all on your bed, which create a perfect little world and setting for a helpless baby little girl.
Upon your arrival Donghyuck digs through his leather jacket before handing you a white blindfold and pink mask. You take the blindfold and mask in your hands looking at them curiously. "There's nothing much I can do for your face not to be revealed, so it's either you block out your eyes or you cover you mouth. Blocking your eyes would mean ditching your glasses. I prefer you to cover your mouth, 'cause your eyes are a whole key." Donghyuck suggests whilst thinking of what Jaehyun said. Jaehyun loved how your eyes instantly gave away how much you loved it.
If Donghyuck was going to use you, he needed to utilize you to the fullest, from head to toe he needed to discover all your perky traits and milk them out.
You already had the looks, all that was left was some personality enhancement.
Taking Donghyuck's advise you take the pink girly looking mask and cover your mouth with it. "Alright babygirl, I need you on the bed,"
As you direct your steps towards the bed, Donghyuck's eyes are on his screen. The view is perfect, you look perfect in your pajama's and the cam is set.
"Wait, let's change your shirt," Donghyuck mumbles while turning around. "Where is your wardrobe? I'll look through it,"
You point it out to him. When reaching your wardrobe he already has a brief idea of what he'll see and how your clothes will be. He's not even fazed when he opens the wardrobe and sees your clothes the way he envisioned it. Dresses on one side of the hangers and jackets on the other and below inside different square spaces are organized collections of your shorts, shirts, buttoned shirts, trouser, long sleeves, skirts- heck you even have labels underneath each row.
He goes straight for the shirts and brings them all out. You get fazed by this as you watch him squat down while looking through the different shirts on the ground. He doesn't even bother fixing them as he picks out one white shirt that's both soft and has a silk element and walks to you.
"Put this on, it's material is satin" Donghyuck hands it to you while sitting down next to you on the bed. "The fabric feels cool and smooth against the skin, which can help regulate body temperature and provide a comfort when having sex,"
He bounces on the bed a bit unbothered by your cheeks that heavily blush. Sensing your hesitancy and sudden stiffness, Donghyuck turns to you. You look nervous, and presumably shy to change.
His hand goes behind your back and caresses it causing your back to automatically arches straighter within his touch. "I know it's your first time babygirl, but I need you to try and get used to this. I teach you sex to my thousands of subscribers and in your favor you go and use the skills and techniques you've learnt on your boyfriend."
It's all too fast, you wanna say. But just hearing his words makes you realize the seriousness of what you signed up for. Him already touching you, and a camera already watching you just reveals how much of a heavy deal and bargain this is. This is cheating to it's finest.
When you don't say anything, Donghyuck's hands have a mind of their own as he scouts too close to you and his hand rounds your waist just as the other holds onto the fabric of your night shirt. His other hands gets a hold too and your heart beats faster by how slowly he's pulling the material up. "Relax and let me take care of you babygirl," He whispers.
Your heart caves in your chest when looking into his eyes as he continues to remove your shirt. Upon getting the sweat shirt off, Donghyuck's eyes instantly latch on your full boobs in the baby blue see through bra that had some white flower designs.
"Fuck, so big," Instead of Donghyuck voicing out the words, your ears perk up when hearing it from some place. Turning your head to the side you notice a laptop. Its opened on two windows, but on the other window you make out two people. Renjun and Jaemin. The words coming out from Jaemin.
Your hands go up to shield yourself as you realize they can probably see you because of the tripod camera that's right in front of your bed. But before your hands can do anything Donghyuck already has them going into the satin shirt. He drags it gently over your body and you try to calm down when he gets up and moves to the laptop. "See you when I get back,"
"We'll be watching," Donghyuck hears Jaemin enthusiastically squeal like a little girl. Donghyuck doesn't respond but closes his face time. He joins in your account (which he recently followed) and sets a 10 minute count down alerting his users and subscribers. He switches on the speaker and syncs it to his laptop 'cutesy s3x pl4ylist'.
He then removes his leather jacket leaving it on the table. Taking the cigarette from behind his ear and inhaling sharply into it while moving to the camera, he takes a stance and simply watches you from the camera angle. "I made a little cute playlist for you." He says as soon as the low music plays in the background. "Lets do this."
Something shifts inside of him. His camera alter ego taps into him as he stares you down like a prey he's ready to tarnish. With your mouth covered by your mask and your eyes purely anticipating and fearfully awaiting him, has him smoking the last of his cigarette before stubbing it out with his fingers and moving to the bed. He gets on the bed but instead of sitting next to you he moves behind you- draping his legs over on each side of you trapping you inside him. He knows he has to take it slow, but just the moment your body heats up his front it brings out his whole alter ego.
You get a whiff of the awful cigarette scent but fix your face when his breath brushes against your earlobe. He hums out and allows his hands to rest on your thighs gently rubbing it up and down. "I'm a performer when the camera lights turn red. For tonight, I want you to relax and allow me to take care of you. No talking, no fear. Just desire, lust and thirst. Feel me," He whispers slowly and faintly.
His hands already rubbing in a slow manner up and down your thighs. He spreads his legs just as his hands part your thighs and in the same motion his palms go up your thighs and over your clothed heat before going down again. His nose begins smelling down your neck as his lips kiss your shoulders.
Your breathing is steady and your eyes are shut as you bask in him. You tilt your head to the side as soon as his lips meet your neck. Your breath hitches when he licks up your neck and plants light kisses against your jaw. You hum in satisfaction just as his hands place themselves on your breasts squeezing them.
"Feel me." He repeats his words as he rubs your breasts. A soft moan escapes you when his other hand goes lower pressing into your core. "Let me feel you." He says once more. You're sure that if your heart was still beating you'd be dead right now from all the adrenaline rushing through your veins as you try to compose and conceal your emotions.
Donghyuck, aware of this, can feel you trembling and tingling underneath his touch. He sucks gently on your neck eliciting a shudder of pleasure from you. His tongue flicks over the skin there and he pulls away leaving wet marks where his saliva is lingering. Your eyes snap open catching his lips in a sly smile. Without warning, he leans forward sliding your mask down and pressing his lips firmly against yours - and boy are you exotic to his lips. You've never been kissed like this before - with such passion, lust, desperation. This is something different. Something hot, intense and dangerous. You gasp when he pushes harder against your lips deepening the kiss. Your hands which have timidly been on his thigh squeeze him as you lean in more for the kiss.
His lips are so hot and gentle. They make you want more and you want more and he knows it and he lets you. As long as you were enjoying yourself he didn't mind indulging you as much as possible. The only thing that mattered right now was the number of views and tips he kept hearing in between the beats of the song. Seems like his audience were enjoying the show. His fingers move under the elastic of your pajama pants and he skids his fingers past your underwear and over your wet moisturized heat.
You breathe out in ecstasy just by the feel of his fingers driving circular motions around your clit, rubbing and swirling around- you arch your back from him lightly. But at the exact same time you want the most and need to feel his lips again. You pull back from the kiss panting as you stare up at him. Yet he dives back for your lips as his other hand slides underneath your shirt squeezing your boob.
Meanwhile the comment section is wilding out in praises just as the tips keep coming in.
Comments:
-now that's what I'm talking about, a cute little girl with the body of a woman! shit take off her top *sends 100pts
-show us her tits! i'm dying over her man
-is that our new baby? damn look at her hands on his thighs🤤🤤damn she's shy fuck her already *sends 50pts
-boobs???? are so much better then Cammy's old saggy boobs
-*sends 1000pts
-that view is to die for *sends 8pts
-nice girl👅
-damn she's shaking look at her legs! *sends 300pts
And just like the comments fire up so are your legs when shaking. You don't know how he does it but when his fingers continuously rub on your clit in a fast motion, you feel your knob tingling and swelling up. Your moans start growing louder as you can't contain yourself anymore. Through the kiss, Donghyuck can hear just how heavy you're breathing and how much you're enjoying it. He bites onto your lip inserting his tongue and allowing it to collide with yours.
Being hit with so many factors you're not too sure what you should focus on as you feel an overdose of pleasure wash over you just as your braincells tighten and you yelp out of Donghyuck's kiss when feeling your hips buck higher and twitch. Donghyuck licks his lips panting out when rubbing your knob with excessive speed feeling his fingers and hands being met with so much spritz of your cum. Donghyuck chuckles lowly just as he feels your pajama pants getting wet and the sounds of the tips ringing nonstop. Donghyuck colides his lips with yours again, not giving you time to fully digest that you just had an orgasm.
He doesn't break from the kiss and he doesn't stop when hearing your whimper by the lack of his touch on your pussy. His fingers slide out of your pajama pants being wet. Leaving your boob his hands begin to pull down your pajama pants. Without stopping the kiss Donghyuck helps you shift your butt up as he begins removing your pants.
He's so skillful that he doesn't once stop the kiss nor open his eyes as he helps your legs slide out your pants. You're so wet. Your pants are drenched and the leaking is still going down your legs as patches of wet and whites cloud your underwear. "Such a milky little girl, you liked that didn't you," Donghyuck mouths in between the kiss.
You on the other hand are breathing in and out of the kiss getting lost of air but at the same time your nerves get the best of you by him removing your pants and exposing your legs and underwear.
When your pants are off, his hands slide up your waist now bringing your top over. It disrupts the kiss just a little, but within those few seconds you moan just as Donghyuck whispers in a husky tone. "Focus on me okay babygirl," His lips dive straight into yours as he leaves your body exposed in that fine baby blue lingerie. His hands roam your body now pressing his hands all over your flesh. Gripping your skin, chunks of your thighs, squeezing and grabbing your crotch. You're a whimpering mess with your eyes closed as you try to focus on the kiss but your mind is just too foggy with lust to register anything else right now. Clouded with thoughts of the sensation his hands have on your naked flesh.
With one hand now gripping your breast while your other hand grabs his hair, his teeth nip playfully at your earlobe while you're biting back moans. His fingers back inside your underwear continuing the motion.
Your trembling moan is the result of Donghyuck rubbing on your sensitive clit again. Your legs try to close shut, but he drapes his leg over yours and opens your leg up wider. "Show them how wet you are, they love this," He lets go of your lips and begins sucking on your earlobe as his other hand pulls down your bra and exposes your nipple. All shame leaves your body as you're too focused and indulged into it that you find it so hard to pay attention to anything else.
Trapped in Donghyuck's touch, your head thrusts to the side as your eyes roll being pleasured beyond comparison. You don't know why you were against this, this is amazing.
You don't even have control anymore as your vocal cords voice out your moans of pleasure and you are jubilated in lust.
Donghyuck's eyes peer for a little to your fazed out expressions and he thinks back to what Jaehyun said- how your pussy is your personality. Pressing more into your pussy and seeing how you shake severly before your hips buck again forward, Donghyuck holds onto your abdomen with his other hand keeping you against him as he feels your quivering state. You try to close your legs but Donghyuck has them tightly locked underneath his own leg, but he does allow you to drag out your high in bliss and joy.
Your breathless pants are cute, your gasping pants are soft the same way a baby coo's peacefully after suckling on her mothers milky nipple. He pats your pussy lightly giving you praises of how you were such a good baby for him.
You try to hear your own voice over the loud pounding of your heart. You blink your eyes several times trying to bring yourself out of the hazy and distorted daze you were in. Donghyuck places a kiss on your cheek and pats your mouth before plunging in his fingers in your mouth. "Suck on it and tell me how you taste,"
You suck on his four fingers in your mouth, your tongue gliding over them. You didn't think it was true, but you sorta tasted like pineapple but a more sour kind. Donghyuck's lips are slightly parted as you look at him feeling shy all over again.
You're not aware that the camera's lights stopped blinking- but you do notice that the music stops and just like that Donghyuck slips his fingers out your mouth.
"That was better then expected." He rolls over off the bed going straight for his laptop.
You're left in heat. All shame returns when you look at how much of a mess you've made. From white juices' dripping from your covered core, to watery cum being on your titled floor as well as your carpet- and not to mention your pajama's that are tossed aside looking like you just peed yourself. It's a mess. You fix the bra strap back over your shoulder and put back the shirt over your body. You feel ashamed the moment your senses return. You were like a hooligan.
Just as your eyes go over to Donghyuck, you notice how he's lighting up another cigarette and starts smoking while sitting on your chair typing rapidly on his laptop. You can hear your voice moaning and it dawns on you that he's watching the video of you.... You're too deep in your thoughts of shame and belittlement that you don't hear when he calls you.
"Damn babygirl, you were perfect," He mutters looking at all the pts tips that entered. "We got up to 38,893 tips. Converting this to cash will pay all my expenses. I could share with you if you want,"
Donghyuck's ears met with silence after he voices out his thoughts. When not hearing you, he turns his head to you.
"Yho, babygirl you good?"
"Hm?" You break out of your thoughts and look up to him. Your hands are on the edges of your shirt. "Tips? W-was it filming? You mean to tell me I exposed myself on camera while you fingered me and showed my breasts?" You don't know whether it comes out sounding conflicted or stressed, but when the words leave your mouth Donghyuck lays his laptop down.
He nods his head, trying to appear calm despite the joy spreading all over his body- he senses that you're no longer in the same blissful high and joyous mood you were in 3 minutes ago. But what can he say, his pts tips with you have risen from his usual 25,000 tips to over 35,000 going to 38,893 tips! That was impeccable. You didn't seem so boring anymore, knowing the power of your pussy is what got him on this high level- and actually happy. But seeing you not so happy, makes him 'try' to empathize. He can't lose you, you're a prized possession now. "You're not happy?"
Your lips are dry, but you remove the mask from your face. "I didn't even know it was recording,"
"That's a good thing that you didn't pay mind to it-"
You don't mean to interrupt, but you interrupt. "I was naked on camera and the mask that was supposed to cover my face was down on my chin."
Hearing you subtly complain is interesting to Donghyuck. You looked so helpless. "I doubt anyone saw your face-"
"Oh my god I was naked on camera." You cover your face with your hands as your thoughts take away the pleasure you felt. "What if my boyfriend-"
Donghyuck lowly curses and comes over to you on the bed. "Hey baby look," Donghyuck licks his lips. "I kept my word and said we'd do something light. With the lights dimmed and your face bashed up against my own as we kissed, I doubt anyone could make out your face. But if it really upsets you, I'm sorry and I'll try my best next time to not get carried away. You just looked so good I had to kiss you, you're lips are all swollen now,"
Donghyuck's hands hold onto your wrists bringing them down. His thumb rubs over your lips and he displays a little smile.
"You didn't like kissing me?" He asks while searching through your eyes. He watches as your face turns a light shade. "You were a really good kisser, and I bet if you kiss your boyfriend like you kissed me, and tell him how to touch you the way I touched you, he'd be pleased at your private lessons with me,"
You huff out quietly and peek up into his eyes before looking down again. "I know I agreed to this, but..."
"But?"
"I've never..." You take a deep breath and try to express yourself without fear. "I'm new to all this. My boyfriend usually asks me before he does something, he prepares me of what he's going to do. You just kissed me and touched me and took off my clothes and made my body feel..."
"Good?"
You sigh feeling your cheeks now glowing. You shyly keep your head down. "Okay, it felt g-g-good but..." You don't know how to express it.
How to express how overwhelmed it all feels. Hours ago, they were writing down this whole report case and just before you know it he's knocking down on your door and you're rubbed off by him on camera. You felt that it was all to fast.
Donghyuck's not dumb, in fact he can understand your unsaid words. "When I asked for your panties in class, you gave them too me willingly. I don't know if you took the money that I left on the desk, but that was me being respectful by paying for your underwear. I've been told I'm a bit unorthodox, so it may come as a surprise to you, but I started this channel fucking old ladies for money. The older the lady, the more money from house wives. Some of these ladies had husbands, others were as old as my mother, and few had grandkids already. What you're feeling, is something I felt when starting off, it's even something the old ladies I fucked were feeling- wondering if we're insane for having sex on a camera. You submitted your CV with requests of satisfying your life with your boyfriend. I'm in need of a cam girl to replace one of my old cam girls, she got married again for the fourth time and wanted to settle down with the dude- anyway back to the point. Choosing you as my cam girl required me to have a rebrand with someone my age. Perhaps this was a bit escalated, but I wanted you to get used to the field already before we go any deeper. Just like I took your underwear and gave you money, what we have between us is purely transactional."
For some reason, it hurts when he says it like that, but it's true. You did sign yourself up for him.
"I give you pleasure and you give me your body. Keep in mind that I'm not trying to destroy you and your boyfriend's relationship, I'm simply benefitting from this new rebrand. As much as I'm taking advantage of you, you need to take advantage of me too. I don't care shit about your boyfriend when I'm fucking you, or having my fingers deep in you. And neither should you care." He remarks. "We don't have to meet up every night, but once in a while when we meet up we know it's business and nothing deep. It's considered cheating for you, but in my world it's just sex. No attachments, no strings, no feelings, just give and take. If anything I'm just here for the money."
"So it doesn't bother you that people are watching?"
"I know it feels heavy first time, but something I do is just to already start making out with you, that way when the camera actually starts filming I won't have to greet the audience and what not. They're just there to watch us. They could care less about what we do outside of this. So no, it doesn't bother me. But if it bothers you, trust me when I say I won't make it as awkward and bothering for you. Just tell me what you don't like and I'll work on it. With that, I apologize for allowing a portion of your face to be seen. For what it's worth, my cam only lasts 15 minutes, a total of 5 songs then it's done. So you won't have to bear being fucked for crazy hours."
He seems nonchalant throughout his whole speech and it's almost scary for you, how nothing he said triggered any emotion in him. He said it's just sex and that people don't care. It makes you feel so dirty and raw, because in your world, it's sacred and traditional. "So... Will you come tomorrow again?"
With that he gets up and begins packing up his things. "If you want me to, you can send me a text. If you're not interested, I get it."
All you can do is watch Donghyuck smoke and pack up all his things. He doesn't say anything else, he doesn't even say bye before leaving your room walking out the main door.
You tell yourself, that you never ever want to experience that again. So when he leaves you find yourself deleting the app Kink Factory. Whatever that shit was, will not happen again.
-
"Dude it's been on the top 5, shifting between 2, 3 and 1 for fucking 4 good fucking days now," Jaemin exaggerates while holding up 4 fingers. "And you're telling me you're looking for another cam girl? He has to be fucking crazy right?"
Jaehyun who's in the process of modelling his 3D cardboard house looks up to Jaemin and then to Donghyuck. Donghyuck is writing down some notes and eating on his own mixed fruit salad. "Ayo Sunshine, are you gonna say anything?"
"What's there to say?" Instead of Donghyuck answering, it's Renjun that answers as he types away on his laptop. "If the girl doesn't want, she doesn't want. We can't force her."
"What bull," Jaehyun rolls his eyes putting on his magnifying glasses to seal some glue on cardboard. "She got cold feet or what?"
"Then she shouldn't have agreed in the first place," Jaemin complains. "This is why I always say we need contracts. Once you sign that paper the deal can never be undone. Fucking bitch."
"Ey," Donghyuck looks up trying to hide his amusement. "Don't be bitter Jaem. She's not used to this and I don't wanna force her."
"You don't wanna-" Jaemin stops himself smacking his head in frustration. "Are you hearing yourself? This is the moment that we-"
"Jaemin." Donghyuck sets his pen down peeking at Jaemin. He understood the frustration coming from his friend, but he also didn't care as much. "I'm not gonna lie, pleasing her felt ten times better then being balls deep in her. Her body is like a machine, you hold it the right way and you can feel it turn on. She's soft but so fragile,"
"We could tell," Jaehyun mumbles focusing on pressing the cardboard onto its place. "Her eyes dude, they were in circles-"
"Forget that, her legs...no that pelvis had a life of its own," Jaemin chuckles recalling watching how your pussy kept swallowing Donghyuck's fingers whole. "She-" Jaemin stuffs his face in his hands mentally dying in lust. "Fuck. You can't control shit like that. Those legs started shaking on their own and her body, damn Donghyuck. Did it not occur to you that I used to flash her skirt up high just to laugh at her granny panties? Now I'm feeling so hard thinking about her granny panties-" Jaemin grunts. "Dude just get her back."
"No." Donghyuck shakes his head getting back to his work. While Jaemin and Jaehyun lament over what could've been on you- Renjun takes notice of how Donghyuck smirks secretly before eating on his fruits.
Normally Donghyuck never got in predicaments like these, but seeing as he did and he wasn't looking fazed only made Renjun suspicious. Knowing his friend for more than 5 years, he knew that Donghyuck was a mastermind manipulator who always had plans up his sleeves. If you weren't agreeing to work with him, Renjun just wonders exactly how Donghyuck would get you back.
Because the smirk emitting from his lips only proved to Renjun that Donghyuck had something up his sleeves.
The talks of you dial down as Mark and Jeno finally join the group after coming out of their afternoon class. "Have you guys been waiting here for a while?"
"Almost 3 hours." Jaemin whines. "What took you guys so long? I thought you went there to submit your work,"
"We did," Mark runs his hand through his hair. "We got held back because Jeno here wanted extra credits. Anyway, are we gonna go or are you guys just gonna sit around,"
"Man I'm beat," Jeno groans when checking the time seeing it's 17h00 pm. "I'm never going to submit late ever again."
While Jeno begins walking out the canteen trying to be ahead of his group of friends so that he can reach their shared dorm apartment...or rather flophouse- you and your boyfriend Chenle are in the comforts of your room.
Chenle initiates a kiss. The kiss you're expecting is something that makes you feel alive. Yet when Chenle has his hand gently underneath your jaw laying simple pecks over your lips in a rhythmatic pattern, your mind is brought back to reality to how Chenle normally kisses.
He was…is the soft type. So he'd never do anything against your will.
Your lips are agitated and you have to hold yourself back from trying to pick up the pace a little. You try to think how the kiss from Donghyuck began. How from one second it went from just a kiss to making you feel like you were experiencing a kiss from out of this world. Unlike Donghyuck, who's kiss was demanding, commanding and eager, Chenle's kisses were soft and sweet as cotton candy. If you had to describe it (and being truthfully honest to yourself), Chenle's kiss wasn't intoxicating and full of fire like Donghyuck's kiss- whereby your whole mind was foggy and blurred. But instead, Chenle had the most softest lips ever and when kissing against yours, you felt bad that you could only think about Donghyuck and how mind wrecking his kiss was.
You have to snap yourself back to the present moment instead of allowing your mind to drift into space while you think of another guy instead of your boyfriend. But you can't help but think how much potential Chenle has when kissing you. He could be like Donghyuck too… if he just worked on some things, maybe you would feel turned on by the kiss.
Your heart heaves in your chest, when he stops the kiss and like usual looks at you with excited eyes. "Is that okay?"
You nod your head humming out happily. "That was good. Uh, baby can you just… like…not tell me what you want to do to my body? Can you just do what you want, without asking me permission?" You ask as gently as possibly.
Chenle's head tilts to the side while he tries to take in your words. "Oh. You don't want me to ask permission? But what if you're not comfortable?"
Uncomfortable is what you felt in the beginning with Donghyuck but then it turned to a mind blowing experiment. "It's okay," You nod your head. Eagerly watching him to see what he'll do.
He slowly nods his head. You try to be hopeful that tonight's session will be a bit different from yesterday.
So yesterday you had sex again with Chenle, but the results where him combusting very easily again while barely being in you. You didn't like that you don't know what Donghyuck did exactly to get you in that state. You were barely conscious and your whole mind was numb as you only focused on the pleasure Donghyuck brought upon you. You wanted for Chenle to do what Donghyuck did to you too. But you don't know what Donghyuck did.
The best thing you can do, is tell your boyfriend Chenle to do what he wants without constantly asking you if this or that was okay. You just wanted him to do it.
You lean your body back when Chenle drapes his legs over your body. His hands boldly resting on either side of your waist as he leans down to your face, pressing his forehead against yours. You can see the way his pupils dilate. "Are you sure?"
You nod, closing your eyes so you don't let tears leak from them. "Yup."
"Okay…"
When you open your eyes again, you watch how Chenle licks his lips. "I've always wanted to do this ever since I saw Sexy Sun do this. Stop me if you don't like it, 'kay?"
"Mhm," You nod, bracing yourself for what he's always wanted to do. Pressing his lips onto yours, his tongue slides along the your mouth. It takes you some moments to realize what he said, but you close your eyes again and let yourself feel how wonderful his tongue feels sliding around yours. His tongue just slithers around. Feeling his tongue on yours, you can't help but swirl yours equally around his tongue. You moan and encourage him. "Good,"
Chenle takes it a step further and hesitantly places his hand on your exposed thigh. HIs hand roams around your thigh before going up along the smoothness of your leg and your legs part lightly. You feel his touch against your panties and gasp into the kiss.
Chenle's fingers rub over your panty lightly. Although it wasn't wet before by his dry kiss, you can feel yourself slowly being aroused by his fingers. As he continues his exploration of your womanhood, his fingers start to rub across the sensitive spot which earns another moan from you.
It's not as deep as Donghyuck's fingers and how they never stopped, but you don't mind. You rock your hips into his hand while you continue kissing him. This time you understand that Donghyuck basically had his way with you by stimulating different parts of your body at once.
Chenle too starts moaning into the kiss. Reeling your body up, and his fingers slightly getting deeper and more into your wet exposed underwear, you buck your hips while your hand holds onto his arms just as your legs slowly start o shake from the pleasurable sensations. Your thighs tremble under his fingers. "Chenle…" You breathe out softly when feeling you're about to cum.
You let out a loud breath of pleasure as he pulls away. Although you didn't squirt, just by feeling the sudden impact made you feel really good. "Was that okay?"
You nod, your breathing heavy. "Yeah." You swallow with excitement in your eyes. "That was really good baby,"
He smiles, kissing you one more time before adjusting his position and helping you remove your underwear just as he pulls down his own boxers. He aligns his member in the entrance of your whole. And just as much as you anticipate something better, your excitement is short lived when he barely places his member into your womanhood. And just like all the other times, you feel like you're cock holding for him again.
He somehow gets off to that and moans out after several minutes of humping 'in and out' of you. You fake your moan and just before you know it, he looks truly pleased with himself. He throws the condom in the nearest bin and lays together with you on the bed after both cleaning up. Chenle helps to clean you up, just as you clean him up.
It's when you lay together in bed, with you laying your bac against his chest and him hugging your waist. You suddenly remember his words and wonder which Kinker taught him that. "So where did you learn that move from?"
"Sexy Sun," Chenle smiles lightly, his eyes are closed, but he manages to kiss the top of your head. "So apparently Sexy Sun came out with a new live video and ever since he reposted it, it's been trending on Kink Factory for a while now. I mean, I can't see the trending video, because for some reason I'm not allowed to view it. But either way, I saw someone else leaked a snippet of it. So he's pleasing this girl and…" Chenle gulps and clears his throat. He always felt awkward talking to you about other girls bodies. But at the same time how could he talk to you about Sexy Sun without mentioning that the part he saw was how Sexy Sun made this mysterious girl squirt out soo much. She was so fucking good to look at and Chenle liked seeing how Donghyuck pleased her…he wished he could do the same for you.
While Chenle stops himself from describing how desireable the girl was, you on the other hand feel heavy in your heart. Your tongue feels so thick that it can't move.
Trending? Kink factory? Sexy Sun? Pleasing a girl?
Could that girl be you?
No. No way. You left him days ago and never logged onto Kink Factory again. It must be some other girl he replaced you with.
"I hate to say it baby, but she was really feeling him." Chenle's eyes open as his hand flings backwards to scamper over his pants on the floor. He brings out his phone and puts it within your view as he logs onto his Kink Factory account. You watch as he goes to his saved pile videos to a snippet.
Your eyes enlarge just as you feel your heartbeat stop.
The video…the snippet is of you and Donghyuck. Donghyuck has your legs wide open with the pajama's scampered on the floor. You try not to gasp in horror of how Donghyuck's fingers are smeared in your wetness as his lips distract yours by giving you a heavy kiss.
Watching it on video vs feeling it gives off 2 different types of aura's. On one hand, the video looks so professional and if that girl wasn't you, you'd probably envy her for being pleased the way she was. But seeing that it's you, has you feeling so much conflictions.
"Baby," You hold onto Chenle's arm that's around your waist. "Y-you like this?"
Chenle presses pause on the video, wondering if you didn't like it or if you have a problem with him liking it. "I know I'm not supposed to save it, since we don't save videos but…this was hot,"
"You find this hot?"
As Chenle can't see your face, just as much as you can't see his face, you both have opposite features and reactions. Chenle is hesitant in answering while you look over the moon.
"It's okay if you find this hot." You mummer with some form of joy. "It looks really…"
"New," Chenle hums. "He's going through a rebranding apparently and he found a shy girl." Chenle informs. "I don't know, but I feel like that kinda fits our genre. You know, exploring and all. After watching just the snippet, I really wanted to watch more. But again, it's like I'm blocked from seeing it or something. I think it's just the system and that I'll be able to see it again later, but until then, the video is hot and we could…you know, work with his new content,"
You wonder how Chenle doesn't recogonise the background of the video. Did the teddy bears, the dildo's and the open view really distract Chenle from seeing that it's your room? You don't know why, but you feel really good.
It's like somehow, your self-esteem is boosted. "So what I'm hearing is that, you want to try out new things. Right?"
"I mean," Chenle closes his phone tossing it over on the bed. "Only if you are."
To be honest, he's been wanting to switch things up for the longest of time, and hearing you react positively to it, makes him eager.
-
Donghyuck had a feeling in him that you'd come back. At first, he didn't want to bank on it, since you never called him or sent a text back. But after catching your boyfriend watch the video in one of the bathroom stalls, Donghyuck felt this upliftment as though he knew that you'd come back.
He didn't have the assurance, but he did have the guts to walk up to Chenle and tell him more about the rebrand and new shy cam girl. If Chenle liked it, then you'd want to come back to him. Why? Because you wanted to please your boyfriend. And what's the first step to pleasing your boyfriend? Liking the things he liked.
Donghyuck knew exactly what he was doing when he purposely blocked Chenle's account from viewing his new released videos. And when he told Renjun to post a snippet to get more people to view the video- he knew that amongst the people Chenle would be part of the multitude. And boy was he right.
Donghyuck smiles to himself looking up to the clouds while leaning on the back of the dormitory building. He puffs out some smoke, before inhaling another breath full of smoke as he walks around the building, deciding to take a stroll. As he's walking, Renjun spots him.
"I don't like how calm you are about everything happening," Renjun starts upon seeing Donghyuck's smile.
"Come on Injun," Donghyuck chuckles. "Live a little."
"Live a little?" Renjun raises a brow. "Should I remind you that it's almost been 7 days since you last posted? This isn't normal Donghyuck. You post regularly and almost daily. But after that upload with that shy girl, you've barely been online. So I want you to come clean now. Tell me what's up your sleeves, why you always got a smile like you won the lotto, and whether or not you got a new girl to replace-"
"You guys stress too much you know,"
Renjun rolls his eyes. "You smoke too much you know. It's affecting your thought process. I hope you realize the end of the month is coming and we need money. Money for rent, water, food- not to mention our damn tuition. Why do you keep smiling like you've got this mastermind plan? Because as far as I know, after you received your money from Kink Factory for that video with that shy girl, you blew it all on your stupid cyberpunk project."
"I don't know how many times I have to say this, but my money isn't just my money. I've got so many things to do with money that I always end up broke in the end. Can't you pay this month's rent for me? I'll pay your next month, so that's double," Donghyuck huffs in a lung full amount of smoke. He really hated when he was reminded of his shitty reality. Especially when it involved money. Upon letting go of some air, Donghyuck tries to bring himself back into a calm state.
"Bro, I can't keep paying shit for you. I already help you so much with your stupid Kink account. Do you know how much sleep I lose trying to maintain your account? It doesn't help that we've planned this whole rebrand only for it to blow up in our faces-"
"It's not gonna blow up in our faces-"
Renjun rolls his eyes. "And how the fuck do you know that? News flash, your muse of a shy girl hasn't texted back in a week and the end of the month-"
"Fuck man, stop mentioning end of the month you're killing my vibe." Donghyuck's face turns sour as he takes in another drag of cigarette. "And for fucking dear life, just trust me, keep your fingers crossed and pray for me."
With that, Donghyuck walks away from Renjun.
When Monday rolls in, Donghyuck is stuck on thinking what the hell he'll do if you're indeed not coming back. After his morning class, Donghyuck doesn't have the strength to attend any more classes as his mind is stressed. Deciding to bring back his peace, his feet lead him on campus grounds- trying to look for a bimbo hoe to 'make him feel good'. Some of the campus sluts only wanted a selfie instead of getting paid to the full, so when Donghyuck finds one of his favorite busty girl's, he begins making his way towards her.
Talking her into giving him just a blow job, the two are snuggled up in the public toilet as she gets on her knees and begins sucking Donghyuck off. Donghyuck lights up another cigarette while the girl on her knees deep throats him- making him feel pretty damn good. The smoke burns down the back of his throat but it feels great too. She makes sure to give him the best blowjob of her life.
While Donghyuck moans and turns his head around by the sensation, he's not expecting for his eyes to meet with you. You step into the bathroom, but upon seeing the erotic scene, you gasp and back out of the toilet. Donghyuck grunts out in anger when feeling the weight of the actual fact that you might not come back to him.
For the first time in a whole while, he made so much more money with you being his cam girl. After days passing he realized just how valid the rest of the guys were when stressing. He tried to maintain himself, but really it's been days and he needed to post something otherwise he'd lose viewers.
Taking out his phone, he goes straight into camera mode and begins making a video of how this random girl was sucking his dick. Instead of making it a full on video, he'd make it a short because he didn't want to confuse his new audience that began subscribing and taking an interest.
Shit. He really didn't think you'd blow up like the way you did over so many people.
He moans out in bliss, when with one full pump the slut makes Donghyuck's cum spread all over her face. She giggles and sucks his sensitive tip while cupping all his white semen in her mouth before swallowing it all with a giggle and joyous grin as she grins on the camera. She continues to pump his cock just as Donghyuck runs his hands over his hair. "Fuck you're so good,"
"I know," The girl laughs, while sticking her tongue out and playfully licks him again. Making Donghyuck feel on edge each and every single time. "Oh, yes. Does baby like it when mommy pumps his fucking fat cock?"
The semen shoots out and she takes it all in swallowing it down. Donghyuck groans out in pleasing moan when ending the video. Cleaning himself up as the bimbo slut gets out her phone taking a mirror selfie - just as Donghyuck poses behind her with a kiss on her neck. She thanks him for his service before walking out the bathroom.
Donghyuck enters one of the stalls cleaning himself up before taking a piss. It's a miracle he didn't piss in her mouth.
When he gets out, he isn't expecting to see you but when he does, he ignores you going over to the sink and washing his hands.
"Uhm." You hesitantly move towards him.
Donghyuck notices this and looks at your figure from the mirror before turning his head briefly looking to you. "What?"
"Oh, hi." You clear your throat and nervously scratch your head. "H-how are you?"
Donghyuck doesn't respond. He dries off his hands and leans against the wall. "I've got a class in Ethical Hacking. Make it quick. What?"
You watch as he brings out a cigarettes from his pocket and carefully lights it up puffing out the air. He smokes so much and it takes everything in you to not be utterly disgusted by the smell, instead you hold your ground giving him a shy smile and maintaining eye contact once his eyes land on you. "I tried looking for you for some days now, but I couldn't find you,"
"Why were you looking for me?"
"Well you see, you said I should message you if I change my mind and frankly speaking I accidentally deleted Kink Factory on my phone." You motion while bringing out your phone and stretching your hand to him, for him to see the phone. "But every time I try logging into my account it refuses and rejects. So I wasn't able to get a hold of you because my account didn't want to log into my account. I think your friends might've changed the password too while making my account have a makeover,"
Donghyuck nods his head taking your phone looking at the login screen of Kink Factory. "Renjun might've done that to prevent you from changing anything. I'll tell him to put it back-"
"Wait no- uhm," You're quick to block him from moving again- by abruptly standing in front of him. "I wanted to talk to you,"
"About?" Despite his nonchalant stiff face, inside Donghyuck is jubilated and knows where this is headed. Thank goodness you finally came around.
"I overheard your friends saying you're looking for a new cam girl,"
He nods his head.
"Are you replacing me?"
"You ghosted me for more than a week, what do you mean am I replacing you? I have to." Donghyuck has a perplexed face as he tries to get past you. But you stop him from moving by stretching your arms wide hindering him from passing.
"What about me?"
"What about you?" Donghyuck tilts his head with a fake smile. "Well you bitched out."
"I mean..." You try to stand your ground being serious, since he as well looked serious. "I freaked out a little-"
"A little?"
"Okay I freaked out a lot because it was my first time doing all that. Can't you just give me another chance?"
"You made it clear that you weren't interested when you ghosted me. What's changed?"
You suck in your lips and nod your head a little. "Okay, I wasn't interested back then, but I am now, I promise that I am. I've been thinking a lot about what you said, that this, what we have is purely transactional and that I should use you as much as you use me,"
Donghyuck raises a brow before running his hand through his hair and taking another drag. "Look, babygirl, I'll be platonic with you right now. That night we were together, we got a lot of tips. And when I converted it, it amounted to so much money. I'd have fucking spilt the money with you if you hadn't bitched out. But you did, and it made me realize I don't have time for all that-"
"Please just give me another chance," You beg with your hands together as you look at him with sincerity, "Please. My boyfriend really liked the content and he didn't even know it was me...and I'm willing to suck up my humanity if it means you'll teach me more things to show him,"
Donghyuck raises his brow. You look adorable when begging with your eyes so full of expectancy. "You're not gonna make a fuss again?"
"No, I promise."
"Are you sure that's a promise you can keep?" You eagerly nod your head, however when he inhales on his smoke and somehow gets you against the wall- trapping you, your confidence withering. "Because babygirl, I have to warn you it gets harder from here and I don't have time to pet you like some animal and say 'it'll all be alright'. My time is money." Donghyuck emphasizes.
"I promise," You lick your dry lips lightly still maintaing eye contact with him even though he's slightly taller and blows air away from your face. He pulls your glasses off and bends closer to your face.
"I've wasted too much time waiting for you, I've got some girls ready to replace you. So tell me, are you worth it this time around?"
You nod your head looking determined and even willing to kiss his feet. Clasping your hands together you give him your most honest and sincere answer. "Please, I promise you that this time around I'll be obedient to everything you say. Truly I don't know anything, but my boyfriend really liked it and I just don't want to seem inexperienced but I am- and I know that you can help me. I've been thinking a lot about what you said that if you're gonna use me then I should use you as well. Please, please take me back and I promise I'll hush down and just let you do what you do best,"
It's music to Donghyuck's ears when hearing you beg. It's a sight to behold when you look just so desperate to do anything. Made its the smoke, or maybe it's your presence, but he truly feels more high looking into your eyes. "In that case, I apologize for pushing you outside your comfort zone the first time. But that's just how I roll babygirl. Will you be able to handle it?"
It feels like you're making a contract with the devil. The atmosphere isn't eerie or anything scary, but it's how intimidating he looks. You nod your head.
"Can we seal it with a kiss?" He quietly asks with mischief as he thinks of Jaemin and how he noted things should be permanent. "That way I'll have proof on my lips that you willingly agreed to do this, again."
Your nervous when accepting, and when his head closes in and his lips meet yours, you try to brace yourself for kissing another guy other than your boyfriend. In your head, you try to remind yourself that you're doing all this for Chenle. That you're doing this so that your sex life won't be something that you dread each and every time you're around Chenle. And so when Donghyuck's moist and warm lips press against yours, you relax completely and close your eyes. It's only when he starts to lick at the corner of your mouth that you open your eyes to find him smirking back at you and pulling away.
"See you at 21h00?"
Feeling flustered from the kiss your eyes pane in between both his own eyes. "Uhm, how about 22h00? Tonight is date night with my boyfriend, I'll try getting him out by 21h30,"
"No problem."
What better way to seal the deal with another mouth deep kiss that has Donghyuck groping you (in excitement that he doesn't have to look for a replacement) and patting your cheek before leaving the toilets. You're left in another frenxy daze of trying to mentally and physically prepare yourself for the events that will take place in the late night.
And it's as though your whole body is waiting for that moment, because the rest of the days events happen in such a flash- in a hurry and in a quick blink of an eye. One moment you're taking down notes with one of your pencils that has seen better days, another second you and Chenle are walking home and he makes food for you (Chinese style) and you can't even enjoy it that much because just when you blink he's already walking out your bedroom and wishing you a good night- and before you know it, there's a knock on your day.
Feeling a deja vu moment, you make your way to the door. Donghyuck is dressed in all black as usual, with that same leather jacket and that nose irritating cigarette. He greets you with a sly smile before he enters your dorm and walks past your living room and straight into your room with you following behind him. Unloading his bag filled with teddy bears, electronics and different types of dildos as well as vibrators, cuffs and different lubes scented and none scented, you feel your heart tighten in your chest.
Are you really ready for this?
You jump when Donghyuck suddenly appears in front of you. His fingers snap at you and you hum out. "Huh?"
"I asked if you're good?"
"Oh," You inhale sharply and nod your head. "I- I'm good."
"Nervous?" He questions, moving over to your desk continuing to set up his laptop device, camera and tripod as well as speaker and chargers with no emotions on his face.
Not knowing if it's a trick question or if he's genuinely concerned, you push those thoughts at the back of your head and simply nod your head.
Donghyuck follows your eyes to the bed and he notices you're looking at the toys. Once he's done logging in and connecting his speaker to the laptop as well as camera, he moves over to the bed. Taking a seat on the bed, he spreads his hand on the bed holding up a life like large penis dildo. "Tonight I wanna have sex with you."
Still standing on the door way, you hope your whole body doesn't show how sudden his whole sentence makes you feel. You try to calm down, but the little tremble that spread over your entire body already has his attention. "What?"
Donghyuck notes how you're spaced out. He was just joking, but your reaction makes him pull your leg some more. "It's been a week since I've posted or even went on live, I can't come on with softcore. My fans haven't waited all week for another foreplay," Unfortunately when he hears a ding on his laptop, he focuses again and stops joking around.
You don't even know that he's joking around because of his poker face. So you take him seriously. "You want to have s-sex as in..."
"Jokes aside, I'll let you pick instead. Hardcore or softcore? I'm good with anything?"
Did he just say jokes aside? Was it a joke to begin with? Your mind was boiling. "S-softcore,"
"Okay. What do you wanna do?"
You're put on the spot and instead of being confident, your head has war flashbacks. Why did you agree again? Was it really necessary that you and Chenle learnt how to have sex? Is pleasing Chenle really worth all this? You'll be cheating on him if you have sex with Donghyuck- speaking of which can't he just demonstrate how it's supposed to be? Would he really be inside of you? You don't even know how it feels- but now you're gonna let him enter you?
Donghyuck snorts out a chuckle as he gets up from the bed and moves to the curtains. Finding that little remote you used last time, he parts the curtains and moves towards the bedroom light dimming it. He even adjusts the camera, facing the side of your bed. When he's done and you're still looking like a deer in headlights, he picks out the clothing he got for you and the pink mask you wore last time.
Walking to you, he snaps his fingers twice and you jerk while looking up at him. "Babygirl, I was just kidding. We're doing nothing too hard. According to Renjun, it's best to get you accustomed to the toys first."
"You're gonna use the t-toys?"
Donghyuck nods his head.
"On me?"
"Well you are my muse and cam girl. And just before you know it, you'll be my very own customized girl." Donghyuck pats your cheek. "I'll be gentle. It's nearly 23h00, no one likes to masturbate that late, unless their perverts, so be a good girl and dress this up for me,"
You lift your hands slowly towards the item...the skimpy looking apron with flowery outlines. "Just the apron? Why an apron?"
"Well I tried to be mindful of the fact that you don't want your body to be seen. This'll cover up enough of you. And if you're having second thoughts think of the kiss,"
You don't know what to do, except do what you must. You're nervous and scared, but you try to remind yourself that you begged Donghyuck...and like he said the kiss confirmed you begging him for another chance. The kiss that made the deal valid again.
"Only the apron."
While you go in your joint bathroom to change, Donghyuck picks up one of the toys- the g-spot egg vibrator. It's a long yet curved almost elastic pink vibrator, that had one large circular end, as well as a smaller one. Donghyuck connects the device to his kink factory, allowing for tips to control the speed.
Meanwhile, in the flophouse, or rather Donghyuck's shabby apartment that he shared with 5 other guys, is vibrant this time of the night. Each male in their own room waiting on Donghyuck to start his cam.
Jaemin (in his shared room with Renjun) and Renjun are on their own separate beds having earphones, while Renjun had his laptop tuned on to Donghyuck's account, Jaemin had his phone connected and he was underneath the covers.
Jeno's in his room (the one he shared with Donghyuck) with the door locked, he's seated on his gaming desk messaging some of other Kinkers betting on whether Donghyuck's live would be a big hit or flop- he obviously voted flop.
Mark, also in on the bet is rather in the bathroom, away from his shared room with Jaehyun. He sits on the bathtub's rail with some tissues set just in case.
Jaehyun in his own room starts counting down with the countdown, just like him, countless other little numbers begin to build up on Sexy Sun's live stream- one of them being Chenle, who was granted access. All the numbers build up on the live, just as all the hands of the horny guys as well as horny girls stuff down their pants/skirts/shorts and begin fiddling with their boners, and wet pussies from looking at the screen.
Redirecting you to live...
[Sexy Sun] Live now!
Your moaning entirely fills up your room. With your face covered with your mask, your glasses long gone from your face, and the apron draped over your boobs and is supposed to cover your mid thigh- but with your legs spread wide open, the apron folds over your stomach.
You're sitting on Donghyuck's lap as he's sitting on a chair. With your neck arched backwards and your wrists cuffed against the chair, just as one of Donghyuck's hands holds your leg wide open to completely expose your pussy to the camera- his other hand rubs the lubricant all over your puffy wet pussy which is slightly hairy.
Donghyuck's lips, mouth and attention are too busy leaving hickey marks on your neck as well as hearing how loud your moans can go. He rubs faster on your clit with all four of his fingers. Rubbing in a circular non stop motion and even swiping his hand incredibly fast moving left and right.
Your bottom starts shaking causing Donghyuck's boner to poke on him. He grunts and thrusts his hips slight up trying to get as much out of it. But he's so focused on rubbing you that he subsides his own pleasures.
"Keep your legs open for me babygirl," Donghyuck whispers breathlessly, just as you hook your feet on Donghyuck's knees. His other hand has no limits when groping on your breast and pulling it out on the side before his mouth dips down and engulfs your nipple sucking on it while his fingers eagerly go fast.
It doesn't help that the music is still on the first song, indicating that you and Donghyuck still had a long way. Your mind is already clouding with lust when Donghyuck's fingers move in a motion that has you whimpering and moaning in bliss. You can't even move your hands because of the cuffs, but your legs feeling the buildup are slightly shaking. And when feeling a swirl of emotions build up from your stomach, your eyes roll tightly to shut and just as you're about to close your legs- Donghyuck's hand lets go of your breast and instantly grips your leg wider to let his wet fingers have more space to rub erotically all over your slippery cum filled pussy.
Not aware of Donghyuck's movements, he quickly stretches his hand back and pulls on the g-spot pink vibrator and without warning pushes the end inside of your hole. It makes you gasp aloud with your eyes popping out for a second as you feel the device curl up all the way in places that Chenle’s dick had reached- and just as the pink ball is shoved inside of you- it leads to a gateway for intense pleasure to shoot inside of you.
It begins vibrating uncontrollably inside of your walls and you yell out in pure pleasure and ecstasy when Donghyuck also adds in two of his fingers in the same whole. Your moans are turned furiously into joyous yelps and yells of pleasure as your hands are restrained by the cuffs- your body is bouncing and jerking all over Donghyuck in extreme pleasure. You can't even get a hold of yourself as your eyes see stars every time you shut them tight.
"Ah shit! Fuck!" Donghyuck curses out when feeling a strong force trying to push his fingers out- tiny bits of squirts push out, but Donghyuck is adamant on rocking his fingers inside of you continuously and finds it entertaining at how you can't control yourself. You’re leaking and squirming and are out of breath and you can’t keep your legs open- that it takes Donghyuck wrapping his leg over yours to stop you from shutting your legs.
“Too much!” Despite the mask covering up your mouth, your voice is beyond your control and bounces all over the room in frantic pleasure filled moans and yells.
"Is it too much? Is it too much?" Donghyuck mocks and pulls his fingers in and out of you just as your hole shots out passionately white cum in squirts. Donghyuck bites his lips watching it all flow out as well as how far it shoots out the pink vibrator. Donghyuck laughs. "Aw baby, you know the fans were tipping you right. They wanna see your pretty, hairy little pussy. They love seeing it, come on, give 'em a show-" Donghyuck mouths very dirtily while tapping on your pussy that oozes out white cum.
The tapping sound over your pussy as well as frantic jolts from your core has your eyes looking to Donghyuck. You rock your own pussy on his hands, and it makes him smirk when your hips roll and your pussy pulsates and begs for him to continue touching you. Donghyuck entertains you and lets you ride out your high. His ears are attentive to the continuous pings that are heard from his laptop- letting him know that the tips were still coming in.
“You’re doing good. Think you could go for another round?”
Your overwhelmed in pleasure and can't even keep your eyes open or your head straight. Donghyuck laughs at your drunken out state and uncuffs one of your wrists so that he can get a chance to stand up and move to where the vibrator landed. Getting back on the seat with your resting body, Donghyuck doesn't take a seat, but instead cuffs your wrist again and allows you to sit down while he gets the extra set of cuffs and stretches your legs wide open and in view of the camera and cuffs them to the chair making sure that the locked chain keeps your legs open and doesn’t allow you to shut it.
He then stands behind your chair each hand playing with your boobs. "I love your tits, damn,"
He squeezes them and rubs them gently before letting go and giving them another tight squeeze himself. Donghyuck starts stroking your breasts slowly until both of your nipples poke out slightly from the apron, he undoes the apron and watches it fall and come undone, completely exposing you. You thought you'd be irritated, but your head is clouded so much.
Donghyuck's fingers massage each breast gently and you moan calmly and he smirks at your reaction.
Placing the vibrator inside of you again, you're not ready for the second round of overdosing pleasure shooting out of you. Donghyuck can't believe how fast the tips come in when the vibrator is in you again. Jaemin is pretty smart when it comes toys-
Your spasming body gets Donghyuck is grab on your neck and bite his lips while coming to the side to have a look at your eyes that are struggling to remain normal. They're rolling, shutting, squeezing- and it gets Donghyuck so hard seeing you fucked out of your mind. This is just a toy, wait till he'd put himself in you- Damn he couldn't wait and palms his pants while watching your face.
That turned him on. And it's even raw when you try and close your legs but your body keeps on jerking and your perky tits bounce and pop everywhere that it gets Donghyuck slapping on them while still grabbing your neck tightly. He can't resist opening up your legs while bending down and stuffing in his fingers in your core again. Hearing the squelching sounds of your pussy as his fingers rapidly rampage your whole- You feel like you almost have an outer body experience when the pleasure is excites and tingles all your senses and floods you with waves of please.
He inserts all four of his digits inside your tight pussy and thrusts them in and out rapidly in speed.
The moment feels long but you’re squirting again and again and again and Donghyuck keeps on putting the vibrator in you even when you beg him that you’re tired and don’t want it. Instead he pats your head and says: “You’re doing good baby, you’re doing so good. Just make me happy one more time. Can you do that for me?”
The whole night feels too long until your cum and squirt out again for the fifth time and your body is lumpy on the chair and almost falling off, with your neck still being gripped in Donghyuck's hand.
Your heart is beating erratically, and your whole body is coated in cum- from Donghyuck smearing your juices all over you wanting you to taste it and loving the shower effect it was having in your room he couldn't stop playing with your juices and spreading it- heck he even got a lot of himself wet from you. The light on the camera turns off indicating the end of the live, just as well as the music stops noting you that it's finally over.
You're breathless and hot. Donghyuck claps his hands and brightly pats your head while uncuffing you, your body drops to the ground too weak to move, but Donghyuck picks you up and places you on the bed.
"Fuck babygirl, you were so hot." Donghyuck opens up the window and before monitoring the tips made for tonight, he looks to you on the bed when hearing a deep snore. "Babygirl?"
You're passed out?
Donghyuck gets off from where he is to go to your bed and watches how you’re really out cold. He picks up your blanket and drapes it over your tired body. Trying not to laugh at how the pleasure knocked you out, he quietly moves around your room. He wanted to give you some pointers for you and your boyfriend, but seeing your sleeping body, he ends up just writing them down on his messenger before sending it to you. Only packing up the toys, cuffs and his electronics, he stuffs the teddy bears underneath your bed before closing the window and curtains and lights and even slightly closing your bedroom door.
He's about to go out when seeing the time is nearly 22h45, but his stomach grumbles and he stops by the front door. Initially the live was supposed to go on for 15 minutes, but he added another 20 minutes seeing as though he wasn’t done yet making you feel really really really good. He clears his throat and sets his backpack down and goes into your dorm kitchen, it's quite big. He opens up the fridge…not wanting to steal or take advantage of your kitchen in your sleeping state, he only pulls out a slice of bread in the heaven of food supplies in the fridge.
He gets sidetracked when seeing a lunchbox labeled 'Left over'. He takes it out and marvels when seeing the food. The Chinese food. Heating it up in the microwave, his mouth waters once he gets to take a bite of the food. It's delicious. And so minutes later, when Donghyuck is done eating a portion, he ends up leaving your dorm and goes to his shared unit dorm, whereby he's greeted by his roommates who all congratulate him on pleasing you well.
It was worth the watch- and they were so content at how exposed your body was tonight, because it meant they could prepare for the more things to do to you.
05h00 a.m.
Your alarm rings jolting you completely from the bed. Your hyperventilating when you jump out of the bed and see you're only in an apron that's around your waist. Your butt and entire body feels the wind that passes by and you can see and feel all the sticky cum resting on your body. Searching for your You try not to feel disgusted when seeing the dried cum on the floor, and the chair randomly in the middle of the room with some teddy bears peaking from underneath the bed- not to mention that your room smells congested and wreaks of your cum scent. You're deeply sickened by how untidy your whole room looks.
"Shit."
Your hands get to work, making sure to not leave a spot untouched. Even the walls have your juices and you go in deep cleaning mode, making sure that your room is spotless.
After a long cleaning session, you find refuge in preparing for school and your actual classes. You've already bathed but yet you're feeling sticky and uncomfortable… it's probably due to the fact that you feel that many people have their eyes on you….they aren't but it feels like they are. Like they know what you did yesterday, and that you were on Sexy Sun's live.
Getting in class and pulling out your laptop, you're moved when seeing you're logged onto that god forsaking website. You shut your laptop immediately when pairs of eyes are on you again. You go on with all the morning classes you have, your mind seriously trying to focus but you feel disorientated.
When you're on your own, during a free period, you take a seat by your usual spot waiting for Chenle. But while you wait for him, your hands are already opening up your laptop.
Just as you see your account logged into with that same set up and with new additional followers, you notice a message from Donghyuck
Sexy Sun: We never got to fully introduce our lessons, but I'll do it here for now. You passed out cold and I'm sorry for leaving all of a sudden, you looked like you needed rest. Anyway, lesson 1 of your sex educations: touch.
-
Read Part 2 here
#nct donghyuck x reader#nct fluff#nct slow burn#nct dream imagines#nct donghyuck fluff#nct dream chenle fluff#nct cheating#nct donghyuck smut#nct new fic#nct donghyuck angst#haechan x reader#nct donghyuck
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Daily Check-in September 11th and 12th, 2023 🎀
Did not have the time to make one yesterday as I didn't get home til almost 11 pm and was so tired that i immediately passed out. I had a really good day today(Tuesday), tho! I ordered a bunch of stationery off of Stationery Pal and Kawaii pen shop, and ahhhh, I love all of it, and they BOTH came in less than a week after I placed my order. The quality of everything is *chefs kiss* and I am so excited to start using all this stuff in my university academics as well as my self study goals! I might even switch back to paper notes because of all the stuff I bought, who knows.
Will not include What I Ate as I honestly don't remember, I am very tired at the moment(Tuesday night), having run most of today with 3 hours of sleep. This check in is going to be a bit more on the self care self compassion side as I had a rough two days honestly.
🩷 Personal Achievements -
Washed my hair
Made it to both classes on time
Organized my new stationery in my desk
Cooked steak *actually* good in my food fundamentals class
🩷 Academic Achievements -
Completed a PSYC writing assignment
Completed NUTR assignment
Completed pre lab quiz for my Anatomy Lab
Completed Osmosis lab report
Earned my Human Subjects Research Training certificate for my PSYC class
(I’m certified to use human subjects in research studies at my university for the next 3 years now, how cool!?)
Should I make a post about the stationery I got? Like a haul/review post? Let me know what you think! It’s all pretty aesthetic so I would love to share my opinions on the quality of the stuff I bought….and I bought a lot of stuff without realizing it!
🩷 As of today, Wednesday September 13th, here’s a little academic todo list for today:
Weekly Writing for my Food Fundamentals class
Take my Exam 1 for my NUTR class
Read Chapter 11 for my Personal Finance class + take notes on IPad
Complete my Nutrition Log for my Fitness for Health and Sport class
Study Japanese for 20+ minutes
🩷 And here’s a little personal to do list for today:
Change current fitted bed sheet to new one I just bought and washed, throw away old one
Take my bedroom trash out, throw out package box
Clean bathroom completely
Sweep bedroom
Organize desk more efficiently
Wash my current dirty laundry
Put away previous clean laundry
Change clear shower liner to my new one
Throw out old carpets and replace with new ones
Follow my skincare routine (my face is begging to be taken care of again)
Possibly hang up my string lights with clips behind my desk and attach BTS photos to clips 💜
Budget for paycheck tomorrow
This check in was definitely a little different than the others, especially cause I started it last night but had to save it as a draft cause I nearly fell asleep while typing it up. I will definitely post an update tonight to see how much of my to do lists I accomplished! Looking forward to having today to myself, as I didn’t go to class due to the extreme rain we’re having (I walk to my campus as I do not drive…at all) and I’m completely home alone today! Let the productivity begin!
Til next time, lovelies 🩷🤍
#pink pilates girl#pink pilates princess#self care#self development#self love#wonyoungism#health & fitness#it girl#mental health#physical health#language learning goals#language learning tips#studyblr#college studyblr#university student#student life#it girl energy#that girl energy#vanilla girl#pink academia#pink blog#girl blogger#coquette girl#dream girl#girlblogging#girly blog#that girl#kpop aesthetic#pink aesthetic#study aesthetic
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Finding Her - Chapter 19
Link makes notes, takes photos and keeps time on his quest across Hyrule, in the hopes of finding Zelda and staying sane until he does.
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Log date: 17:35. 9th month, 18th day 104AC
Location: Lookout Landing, Emergency Shelter
Weather: Overcast, drizzle
Arm hurts, really hurts. A Yiga got me there. In a bad way, but getting better.
Don’t know where to start or where to end. It’s Autumn already, but it was Summer yesterday. Talk of a Blood Moon soon. Or did that already happen? Head’s swimming. Losing my grip a little and then suddenly I’m
Upstairs, in the loft, dozing. Zelda’s downstairs. Where’s the flour? she asks, I want to bake something. It’s been over a hundred years! So we try but I’m a better cook than a baker and she’s a culinary mad scientist. No measuring cups, no recipes, just vibes. We’re sitting on the floor waiting for the cake to bake, flour everywhere, and then she’s on my lap, then her lips are on mine, then her apron is gone along with the rest of our clothes, and when I wake up in bed next to her, there’s still flour in her hair.
Was that yesterday or the day before? Trying to hold on. Time flowing through me like air out a window. If I reach out I can catch moments in my palm: Standing with Scorpis under a sunshade, waiting for the rain to pass. He’s telling me it’s a family legend that his great-grandfather was a Knight, like me. Then I’m with Jerrin, getting my bandages changed. She says it’s a miracle I survived, or perhaps the Goddess’ idea of a joke. Then Muzu is insisting we train the soldiers harder, but Slergo and Offrak say people are already working their guts off. Gralens hands me the latest edition of the Lucky Clover Gazette. Buliara and Harth take inventory of my gear and weapons. Mubs reads me a letter from Garini, who says hi.
I’m here. I’m trying to be here. They’re saying the Sages are on their way to Lookout Landing. They say victory is near. But all I wanted was her, and that future only half-dreamed. The one where we have a house on a hill and it’s being renovated to add a library. Zelda’s downstairs, reviewing the plans over a cup of tea, and I’m upstairs, in the loft, checking on the baby. He was a winter-born child, like me, so he’s strong. There’s a cake in the oven. And it’s a good one.
A photograph of the kitchen in the Emergency Shelter. It’s quite orderly, as though someone has recently given it a tidy, though some jars of flour, sugar, milk and yeast are still out of place. There is a fire crackling below the stove.
Caption: Does she prefer vanilla or chocolate icing? I should know this…
---
Log date: 19:34. 9th month, 21st day 104AC
Location: Passeri Greenbelt, Hyrule Field
Weather: Partly cloudy
Cool morning. Trees are going red now. Rode out with the Monster Control Crew at noon. There’s a camp nearby that they hit once every few weeks, but each time it gets rebuilt a little closer to Lookout Landing. We prayed at the Goddess Statue before we left. Paya is here now, leading the services. As the hours tick down, all round the clock, people pray.
The Sages arrived two days ago. Impa and Robbie not long after that. Here to give every last Message Medallion a service, Robbie said, while Impa handed Josha a stack of ancient texts to translate. Then, an emergency meeting with the Sages. They’re fidgeting, they’ve heard the rumours. Purah starts saying something but I stop her. They won’t believe the truth from anyone but me. Don’t know what I said, only that I tried to think of how Zelda would tell them, if she were in my place.
Felt like all hell broke loose after. Gasps, cries, bowed heads, furious tears and vows of vengeance. All that anger and grief is a torch to a powder keg. Suddenly Purah is saying we march at dawn, tomorrow we avenge our Princess and destroy the Demon King! And I’m standing there unable to breathe because I realise I'm not ready. I can’t face him yet and I don’t know why. And I’m trying to think of how to say that without freaking everyone out, because your hero isn’t exactly meant to have second thoughts… when it’s Josha who saves me one final time.
‘You can’t go!’ she cries. She grabs some ancient book and flips through the pages, pointing to what looks like a lunar chart, with a bright red circle at its centre. ‘There is a Blood Moon tomorrow! If it happens while you’re down in the Depths, it could be a disaster!’
More whispers. A bit of back and forth. Purah brushes her off as paranoid, but then the Sheikah gather around a couple calendars and do a few calculations, and in the end, the attack is called off.
So Ganondorf got himself another day, and so did I. Can’t delay forever but… there’s just something not settled in me yet. When we win this, everyone else’s lives go back to normal.
But what about mine?
A photograph of the night sky, clear as glass and only broken up by the pinprick lights from distant stars. Low above the horizon, almost pulsating, is a huge, crimson moon.
Caption: She was right, the little rebel.
---
Log date: 10:00. 9th month, 22nd day 104AC
Location: Sanidin Park Ruins, Hyrule Ridge
Weather: Fine
They’ll have realised I left by now. I put a note on my pillow promising to come back by sun-down. Have to keep moving in case they send scouts after me.
Not abandoning them. Would never dream of it. But I promised myself to chase every lead and this last one is for me.
Read through the Lucky Clover Gazette this morning and a headline on page 8 caught my eye. WINGED WRITER HANGS UP HIS FLYING GOGGLES. Penn? He’s leaving the Gazette? He told me that Traysi loved his work. I have a great all-weather climbing set to show for it.
Might be stalling. Might not. Just want to figure this one out. Penn was looking for Zelda too, after all. And maybe searching for something else along the way – a reason to wake up each morning, get back on the trail, and soar long…
He deserves to know what happened, or at least for someone to thank him for his hard work. Or maybe I just want to see a friendly face, before the end of it all.
A photograph of the said Lucky Glover Gazette article, held up for the camera, the greenery of Hyrule Field just visible in the background. There is an illustration of Penn literally hanging up his goggles, with a pantomimed look of resignation on his face.
Caption: You can take the man out of the newspaper…
---
Log date: 15:50. 9th month, 22nd day 104AC
Location: Great Sky Island, Central Hyrule Archipelago
Weather: Clear
I found Penn on Washa’s Bluff, in a gazebo where an old friend and I sat once. Kass would sing until the sun went down, and as thanks I’d make us both dinner. His songs still carry on the wind if you know how to listen. They’re the songs of the land, after all.
We talked for a long time. I told Penn we made a great team, that his leads were invaluable, and that chasing them down kept me on my toes. Sure, we didn’t find Zelda, but we told the stories of her people and should be proud of that. He said he’s still leaving the paper no matter my flattery. Spoke about having lost his touch, that his instincts were gone. A reporter without instincts is like a Knight without a sword. It didn’t help when he noticed that I did, in fact, have my sword back.
‘Don’t worry about me, partner,’ Penn said. ‘I’ll get back in the air, someday.’
But I was worried. I didn’t want Penn to lose hope… I didn’t want to lose hope. And in that moment, it felt like waking up. Like surfacing from beneath deep waters. I wanted to be alive. I wanted to live a good life. I knew I still did, even without her, even with all the pain.
So I said to him that maybe wanting to be better is its own instinct. Maybe trying to find something or someone or some meaning to it all is what keeps us going. And maybe we don’t have to do any of that alone. Penn sat with that for a long time, and then pulled out his notebook.
‘Would you want to write a column for the Gazette?’ he asked. ‘Our readers would love it. I’ll edit it, of course.’ How could I say no? We shook on it then and there. So much for his sabbatical.
It’s nearly time. I bid Penn farewell, then came here. Wondered — if I could choose how to spend one last afternoon, what would I do? The answer was easy, though it took a little while to coax Zelda to join me. But now we’re here and we’re ready: for a nap, with the sun on our backs, and nothing else but us and the quiet moments we can still share.
I miss you, Zelda, even though you’re right here. I miss you more than I could ever say. But I’m going to keep on living. I’m going to live enough life for the both of us. I think it’s what you might have wanted.
If nothing else, I consider it a duty. What is a Knight, if not a devotee to his lady?
A photograph of the Light Dragon, coiled around a hollow tree stump that sits atop one of the atolls of the Great Sky Island. Three Korok wind-fans are placed in front of her snout – a makeshift lure, and apparently a successful one. On her mane is Link, resting comfortably on her hair. Together, they doze.
Caption: You deserve all the rest in the world.
---
Audio log transcription date: 104.09.24
Time: 9 minutes 45 seconds.
LNK | 08:00
Gloom’s Approach in sight. All units report. Vanguard?
MIN | 08:00
We will lead the charge.
YNB | 08:00
Launching on your command, Link!
LNK | 08:01
Flank?
RIJ | 08:01
Static charging as we speak.
TLN | 08:01
With some guidance. Arrows ready.
Any monsters down there won’t know what hit ‘em.
LNK | 08:01
And rearguard?
SDN | 08:02
I am here. If you are hit, fall back to me.
LNK | 08:02
Last not but least, intel?
JSH | 08:02
Reporting in. We’re here to help from Lookout Landing, however we can!
LNK | 08:04
Alright, listen to me. Zelda gave us everything she had for this, but she also gave me an order: protect you all. If anything happens, you get yourselves out. Everybody lives, do you understand me?
MIN | 08:04
Link…
TLN | 08:04
What about you?
SDN | 08:04
Zelda would not want you to throw yourself at death!
LNK | 08:05
That’s not happening, not when I have her power right here with me.
RIJ | 08:05
Then give us your orders Link.
YNB | 08:05
We’ll do whatever you say.
LNK | 08:05
Fight smart, hit hard. Don’t touch any Gloom, keep your Sundelions in reach. As soon as we have a visual on Ganondorf, we do whatever it takes to finish the job. Clear?
[All answer: ‘Clear’]
LNK | 08:06
And whatever happens…
I’m glad to have spent this time with you.
RIJ | 08:06
Likewise, Link.
MIN | 08:07
Yes, it has been an honour.
TLN | 08:07
We’ll finish this together!
SDN | 08:07
For the Princess!
YNB | 08:08
For Zelda!
LNK | 08:08
For Zelda.
Any last words? Josha?
JSH | 08:09
Nothing at the moment, but the further underground you go, the weaker your signal will be. I’m going to disable a few processes to conserve power, like the audio transcription. Let’s hope we don’t need it.
LNK | 08:09
You heard her. Make it count. Or at least live to tell the tale.
LNK | 08:10
Okay, heading in.
See you on the other side.
#totk#tears of the kingdom#zelink#tloz fanfiction#legend of zelda#zelink fanfiction#link#penn#ITS NEARLY DONE AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA#she's nearly home boys lets gooooo
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SSR Jack Howl Bloom Birthday Personal Story: Part 3
"Happy Birthday"
(Part 1) (Part 2) Part 3
[Savanaclaw Dorm – Birthday Party Venue]
Deuce: Okay, time for the last question.
Deuce: “How do you spend your days off?”
Deuce: …Is what it's asking. I mean, I think I can guess, but…
Jack: I'm usually training on my days off.
Deuce: Yeah, thought so. Whenever I'm out for a run on my days off, it's not like we don't bump into each other often or anything.
Deuce: Isn't there anything else you do?
Jack: What else… I take care of my cactus, and I prep and review for class.
Deuce: Class prep, huh… Guess I should take a leaf out of your book sometime.
Deuce: Oh yeah, that reminds me, I saw you in town the other day… What were you doing then?
Jack: The other day…? Ah, that was probably the day I went to go check to see if the new protein bars were out already.
Jack: But hey, wait, so you were out in town too? If you saw me, you shoulda said something.
Deuce: I mean, you looked like you were really focused on the products you were staring at, so I didn't want to interrupt…
Jack: Uh-huh. That's considerate of you.
Jack: Yeah, so I have my usual products that I like to get, but their nutritional values can change based on the maker and the flavor.
Jack: Whenever I go into town, I make sure to check for any news on restocked or new products.
Jack: If I'm going to be paying the same amount of money anyway, don't you think it's better to have stuff with more nutrition in it?
Jack: And I'm pretty sure how effective each one is depends on the person…
Jack: So whenever I start a new product, I always make sure to keep a notebook on any changed in my weight and muscle gain.
Deuce: You're so serious… Or I guess more like intense.
Jack: It's just that I want to be as thorough as I can be if I'm making comparisons.
Jack: Plus, if I keep a log, then I won't accidentally buy something that I didn't like.
Deuce: And with that, the interview's over. Great job, Jack.
Jack: Yeah, you too.
Deuce: And, now it's time for the main event… The moment that the birthday boy flies on his broom!
Deuce: Here you go, this broom was prepared for you. They said that the flowers on the end were made to suit you specifically.
Jack: This thing? It kinda feels a little too flashy for me…
Deuce: You think? It's got some real heavy-looking flowers, so I thought it was a perfect for you!
Deuce: Anyway, you better go all out! Show us all how cool you can fly!
Jack: Hm, you don't have to tell me twice. No way I'm gonna let you guys see anything lame from me.
Jack: I don't want to be looked down on, just 'cause I'm a first year. I'll show everyone on campus just what I can do.
Jack: …Alright! They better keep their eyes on me, I'm gonna show 'em all how it's done!
(Part 1) (Part 2) Part 3
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Harp's Kongzilla (Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire) Thoughts
(Update ??? 6: [Mission log. I can't tell if it has been 6 minutes since I lost contact with the outside world, or 6 years. Time doesn't move the same in this space. Will I ever be home again, or will I have to make this hellscape my "home"?] Even if you don't care about Godzilla this might be fun to watch the ✨ chaotic progression of my mental breakdown✨! Who needs Kongzilla, when you can pop some corn and watch a ✨ timelapse of Harp's kaiju-inspired demise✨?)
Just got back from seeing Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire in a really nice, really big theater and I have a torrential hurricane of thoughts I MUST get out RIGHT NOW.
THIS MOVIE FUCKS SEVERELY!!!!!!!!!!
(Edit: [kind of an edit I haven't posted this yet] It has been an 1hr and 1/2 since I started typing and I haven't gotten through my spoiler-free review. Kongzilla was only 1hr 55min bro. I am so fucking lost in the sauce bro.)
(Edit 2: [still haven't posted] sorry about the colored text and the bolding and the effects. It is the only way I could keep myself sane. Yes it will continue into the spoiler reblog.)
Usually the first thing I do after seeing a movie at the cinema (not including rambling about it with whoever went with me to the theaters) is look up what other people are saying on the internet. Reviewers, Tumblr, general internet surfing (I'm a nosey bitch who likes to see who I disagree with, sue me).
But I COULD NOT with this one. I turned all my notifs off. They are staying off until I fucking finish this post.
(Edit 3: [I'll post eventually] YES I intend to keep that promise until I finish the spoiler-filled reblog. I took an extra of my ADHD meds to stay up this late. I HAVE to expend that energy somehow.)
Also, I am going to refer to Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire as Kongzilla going forward. I still haven't checked tumblr so it's probs a ship name but it's what I've been calling the movie in my head since I was told I was going to watch it in theaters.
Big Godzilla and Kaiju buffs PLEASE take all my commentary with a grain of salt. I don't know goddamn ANYTHING in depth about Godzilla movies or lore.
Also this is a sequel! I haven't seen the first one!! But I didn't even need to see it bc there is just the right amount of context that you don't have to have seen the 1st to watch this one! So, truly not a point against me. Rather, a point TOWARDS this movie.
The only reason I've seen so many Godzilla movies in theaters is because my brother has been OBSESSED WITH and ENAMORED BY classic kaiju movies and their successors since before my brain was able to make long-term memories, probably even before I was born.
So I go to all the big Kaiju blockbusters with him because he is my big bro and I care about his interests (and also because no matter the movie quality, I didn't pay for the ticket and I probably also got free popcorn). Pretty much ALL of what I know about Godzilla lore is from him and also manga that have kaiju (or are at least kaiju inspired).
Okay, I am gonna ramble all my thoughts. BUT!!!! If you are like me and end up checking Tumblr to see if you'll like a movie, I'll leave something for you. It starts at the TL;DR in purple and goes past the read more.
(Edit 4: [This rambling review I initially wanted to make for the tumblr interaction for fun has turned into my own personal Purgatory/Saw trap. Free me.] Moved the read more cutoff further up because I rambled MORE during my read through. I also ended up removing most of the purple emphasis coloring, bc if people don't read this fucking thing because of too much color I'm EATING THIS FUCKING LAPTOP.)
I was gonna do my spoiler rambling here too but I have been going for over and hour and several paragraphs, so the spoilery rambling will be in a reblog of this post. If you're even interested. IF YOU EVEN CARE.
TL;DR WATCH THIS MOVIE.
Even if you're not the biggest Godzilla or kaiju buff, even if you haven't seen the first movie in this series. WATCH IT.
Also, once more I am a Godzilla layman. The lore is my brother's zone. I do not speak for what Godzilla and kaiju buffs would think. Please Godzilla Tumblr fandom don't kill me!!!! If I say I thought Kong and Godzilla were kinda hot ( I mean this in the monster fucker way NOT the furry way [not that I'm bashing furries. I'm not a furry tho.]) will that make you like me more or less?????
ANYWAYS
It is fucking fun!!!!! And also the WEIRDEST whiplash between heartwarming and funny that I have never seen work before. BUT IT WORKS HERE!! SO WELL!!!!!
Even if you are jaded about seeing movies (especially franchise films, reboots, and actions) I recommend it. I am also jaded, it's been so long since there has been something I wanted to see in theaters.
And as of 1:26 AM my time, about 1hr and 30min since I left the theater (please let me ouuuut) I AM 100000% WILLING TO SEE IT AGAIN. I'D PAY FOR MY OWN TICKET !!!!! (I never pay for my own ticket! People have to bribe me into the theaters!)
The only other recent one I've enjoyed has, funnily enough, been Godzilla Minus One. And for similar(???) but also very different(!!!!) reasons.
Godzilla -1 was very thoughtful and painful and it made you sit in the despair the characters felt as their lives were razed to the ground. I also 10000% recommend you see Godzilla -1, but only if you want to experience a story that flays open a lot of the devil-may-care destruction that action (and monster) movies revel in.
Kongzilla didn't give me any fucking time to think (I mean that in the BEST way). It was 1hr 55min long (very refreshing) and it was batting me around like a fucking pinball in a Godzilla-Kong-FoundFam pinball machine. I was just along for the ride, but now I am left bereft in my many many thoughts. Which is why we are here.
Jesus I am rambling more than I expected okay uh uh. Now for a DO WATCH IF vs DON'T WATCH IF, in case my words have failed to compel you.
Pros Coloring Code
Pink = Emotional reasons to watch
Blue = Action reasons to watch
Orange = Horknee reasons to watch (hey, it happens)
Green = ????
DO watch if:
You are a sucker for found family
You are a sucker for big monster found family
ACTION!! THRILLS!!! BIG MONSTERS FIGHT RAAAAA
You have been looking for a heartfelt, yet funny (and fun) action that actually feels like it has a heart (I am subtly critiquing you superhero movie industrial complex)
YASSIFIED PINK GODZILLA
BIG MONSTER CGI THAT LOOKS ACTUALLY GOOD!!!!
Pretty ladies!!!!! (I could see the main lady's shimmery gloss and freckles in hi def it was a spiritual experience. God shes gorgeous I'm gonna reblog so many gifsets)
Pretty men!!!!! (Australian vet weirdgirl [but man] was treated as the seductive hottie by the movie and goddamn they were RIGHT. Also conspiracy theorist dude was so fucking handsome too. I don't even LIKE men!)
A cute kid dealing with the loss of her entire world and thrust into a place she doesn't feel she belongs.
That cute kid being the DAUGHTER of the main lady. They communicate in sign and it is so fucking heartfelt and genuine!!! (more l8er)
Unexpected (to me) polycule???? Not ACTUALLY canon but bro it felt like it (even more l8er). Idc if some element was queer/ship bait. I fell hook, line, and SINKER. Get that kid 2 extra dads with her order of mom!!!!!!
Silver fox (ba dum tss) grizzled GILF Kong???? I was not expecting that the wet meow meow of the movie would be KONG, but... here we are
Seriously an alt title could be Kong and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day
POW! BWAAAAA!!!!! VWOOOOOO
Godzilla destroys a nuclear facility in France.
Bro this got so long I had to go back and fucking color code.
(Edit 5: You have no fucking idea bro. Your rambling [and emotional state] gets worse!)
DO NOT watch if:
You have photosensitive epilepsy or if you feel there is ANY chance flashing or flickering lights might trigger a seizure. It fucking sucks how few movies are safe for people dealing with photosensitive seizures (or any photosensitivity issues) but this IS one of the ones that'll fuck you up. Do NOT risk your health for GILF Kong. He would want you to stay safe and healthy!
I'm 10000% serious about the warning. There is a scene where they were warping into Hollow Earth and the flashing and flickering and general sight fuckery got bad enough to make ME have to look away. It lasted for at least a minute too. Jesus.
DO NOT SEE THIS IF FLASHING LIGHTS AND CINEMA FUCKERY WILL RISK YOUR HEALTH.
In a similar vein, if you experience vertigo or really bad motion sickness this movie will be hell. The story deals with gravity and spacial fuckery and the cinematography reflects that. The opening shot was REALLY COOL but it was dizzying. You could probably get away with watching it at home, but it'll FUCK YOU UP at the cinema.
You just in general don't like back-to-back always bumping action. If you wanna see a newer Godzilla movie but don't fancy the roller-coaster movie feel, look into Godzilla Minus One.
Okay!!!! I think this is finally fucking it? For the spoiler-free discussion at least. God. Whatever is happening to me is unholy.
If i wake up tomorrow (today) and I'm still as fucked up about this movie, if this isn't just the fucking extra ADHD med, if it turns out my newest hyperfixation is a fucking Western Godzilla x Kong movie series????
I think I'll have to toss myself into a panic chamber, in case I am suddenly overcome by the impulse to buy kaiju models worth hundreds of dollars (I know there are more expensive ones but I am poor enough to know my own limits) for ME to keep instead of for my brother.
Oh Jesus, I won't even be able to ramble with him about it because I'd become fixated in a queer/monsterfucker way and either he wouldn't at all understand or I would be forced to reckon with a reality where I know my brother's romantic preferences and those preferences are giant monsters. I couldn't take that man it'd be joever for me.
OKAY WRAP IT UP LOSER!!!!
That's it for the spoiler free section! Either I will pass out as soon as I hit post or I'll end up writing for like 3 more hours regarding spoilers.
SO CHECK THE REBLOGS (not right away give me time) FOR MY SPOILERY THOUGHTS!!!!!!
I am NOT allowing myself to look this fucking thing over again. I need to have self control.
#harp rambles#harp rants#godzilla#kong#godzilla x kong: the new empire#movie review#if i tag kongzilla will it reach the wrong crowd?#Well#it would be the right crowd for me but this isn't actively monster shipping so it'd feel rude#to knock on their door promising ship content#and proceed to throw a pie at their face and ramble like a missionary in front of a dilf#you know who else is a dilf? kong :)#okay done!!!!!#okay did the last mission log but almost had a fucking heart attack bc my internet disappeared for a sec#tumblr wouldve had a draft saved but my flow would be DEAD#please think im funny and give me lots of reblogs OR THIS MOTHRA PLUSHIE GETS IT#kaiju
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2023 book log/year in review!
here is a comprehensive of breakdown of every book I read this year!!
Terry Pratchett's Discworld
this was THE YEAR OF DISCWORLD for me. I read more disc books than non disc books. I'm probably gonna take a break from the series for a few weeks to get my breath back. I read my first ever disc book, Going Postal, in december of 2022 so it doesn't technically count as being part of this year, but here's every one that I read starting in january, in the order I read them:
Making Money
Raising Steam
Guards! Guards! (x2)
Men at Arms (x2)
Soul Music
Feet of Clay
Mort
Jingo
The Fifth Elephant
Night Watch
Wyrd Sisters
Faust Eric
The Wee Free Men
Witches Abroad
Thud!
Monstrous Regiment
The Truth
Lords and Ladies
Hogfather
Rereads
The Fourth Bear is kind of whatever but rereading all the others has cemented them as some of my favorite books and I'm really glad I got to experience them again because I hadn't read them in years 😁
The Fourth Bear by Jasper Fforde
Catch-22 by Joseph Heller
How I Killed Pluto (and Why It Had It Coming) by Mike Brown
Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency by Douglas Adams
The Long Dark Teatime of the Soul by Douglas Adams
Other Books
It's kind of embarrassing to see how this list pales in comparison to all the disc books but I WAS reading other stuff I swear!! look!!
Colorless Tsukuru Tazaki and His Years of Pilgrimage by Haruki Murakami
Sacrifice by Mitchell Smith
Station Eleven by Emily St. John Mandel
The Left Hand of Darkness by Ursula K. Le Guin
20,000 Leagues Under the Sea by Jules Verne
The Lost Future of Pepperharrow by Natasha Pulley
I Am Legend by Richard Matheson
Did Not Finish
Some of these I got through more of than others. the really bad ones I dropped only after 50 pages or so. im sorry women.
Closing Time by Joseph Heller
Early Riser by Jasper Fforde
The Real and the Unreal, vol. 2: Outer Space, Inner Lands by Ursula K. Le Guin
A Wizard of Earthsea by Ursula K. Le Guin
Let the Great World Spin by Colum McCann
Total Stats
Books started: 36
Books finished: 31
Books finished that I hadn't read before: 26 (19 Discworld, 7 not)
I PROMISE I'm not trying to be one of those "30 books in 30 days!" type booktok people, I wasn't aiming for any specific number. I only read this many books because i genuinely really loved them and couldn't stop reading them!!!!!!!
Reading List for 2024
I have an even longer list than this with a bunch of books that I saw or were recommended to me and I thought "oh that seems interesting maybe I'll check it out" but who knows if I will actually get to them. this list below is basically a new years resolution, books that I fully intend to read this year:
Cloud Cuckoo Land by Anthony Doerr (already currently reading this one, just need to finish it)
Slaughterhouse Five by Kurt Vonnegut
Facing the Wave: A Journey in the Wake of the Tsunami by Gretel Ehrlich
One Hundred Years of Solitude by Gabriel Garcia Marquez
Sea of Tranquility by Emily St. John Mandel
The Watchmaker of Filigree Street by Natasha Pulley
The Bedlam Stacks by Natasha Pulley
The Half Life of Valery K by Natasha Pulley
Fun Home by Alison Bechdel
Maus by Art Spiegelman
Discworld Reading List
Yes, I am keeping this one separate. I don't necessarily intend to get to all of these by the end of 2024, just some time in the future (I probably will end up reading them all next year anyway LOL). Once I finish these, only the Rincewind and Tiffany Aching series remain. I'm not as interested in those based on the small sampling I got of them, but I'll probably read them all at some point just for the sake of completion.
Moving Pictures
Snuff
Reaper Man
Pyramids
Small Gods
Equal Rites
Maskerade
Carpe Jugulum
it's kind of scary to think that this is all thats left..... idk what im gonna do after that man..... kill myself? start over from the beginning? I guess ill just have to cross that bridge when I get to it ☹
happy new year everypony!!!!
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It is once more Sunday!!
I am also kinda taking off this weekend because breaks are important! But I've still done stuff!
Just some small stuff. MelS is about 1/3rd through the document. I don't think I'll get it back next week, but maybe the week after that.
I've also done some clean up in our documents for when we revisit the previous chapters after the writing of the story is complete. No major changes will happen in the story, just ensuring hints are there and the style is consistent throughout the chapters (since we had long breaks between chapters).
Through this, I've noticed a few spots where the coding could be a tad more organised.
I've mainly worked on TRNT at the start of the week, but still have things to share.
First, the OG parser will stay in the game. I'll provide a walkthrough of each ending, as well as a command accepted for each action in each passage.
Second, the hyperlink version (click on the words) has been drafted. There are actions I am still not sure how I'll code, but that's future me's problem. Also, it won't be completed until the Revamped Parser version is done.
So, third, the Revamped version. I have untangled some of the spaghetti code and managed to solve some issues already (mainly the navigation between rooms. Things to look forward to with this new version:
a Map of the story (it will be small, but still), unsure yet if in-game or as a downloadable piece.
a Walkthrough (probably both in-game and downloadable)
better Hints/Help throughout the game, especially in terms of commands
and better Commands period (I've done away with the name thing)
There's quite a bit of work left with this (So Many TO-DO's in the code... ;-;) but a potential update by the end of the month seems possible?
Depending on time, I may be able to include more actions/codex/story. Or not...
I woke up chaotic earlier this week and made a poll. You will be getting a character creator template....
....
in two parts.
I've gone a bit overboard with the level of characterisation (seriously the list of traits and stuff is a full page long...) and coding all of it is taking me a bit more time than I though it would (yay me and my sense of time management...).
This first version of the template will only include examples and some tips (and comments in the code). A follow up update will include a fake playthrough (and potential fixes).
~
I'm also going to be moving the Tweego Template to its own page next week (will still be available, just a different link), so the guide can be "playable" as well.
As well as making a copy of all templates on my GitHub as a copy.
Ooooh quite a bit of things here!
It took me about 7 months and almost 300 reviews but I've made it to the front page of the IFDB! Top 4 reviewers!
Next... the actual podium :P
(First spot is probably impossible. I'd need 3000+ reviews to get there...)
But really, I'm going to play more IF and review them. I'd like to (re)play more French ones especially. And I have a few BareBones review to wrap up as well. Check @manonamora-if-reviews for that!
~
I've been slowly but surely migrating old logs on a new platform for safe keeping. I'm almost done with 2021 for @manonamora-if (I need to check the old CRWL ones from @crimsonroseandwhitelily, currently privatted). I'm including game announcements (in their most current form) there as well.
I still have 2 full years of dev logs, random thoughts, announcements, and post-mortems to include there (as well as post-mortems I forgot to write). Some short logs will be merged together and have their grammar tweaked a bit (because oh boi are they bad...).
But, when this is complete, I'll probably be more active on the blogs with reblogs here.
~
Toodalooo!
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(Complaining)
Today I got to work. The first hour was teaching my extracurricular class. Then I went directly to my homeroom class, taught their lesson, then sat with my wigglers for the next teacher's lesson because otherwise they run around in the back of the room screaming. (IMHO our school expects two year olds to sit for lessons for way too long. It's 45-50 min total. But I've suggested at least breaking up the lessons before and am always told no by the leaders. I do let the wigglers check out and go read a book or do a puzzle when they really can't sit, because I just think it's ridiculous that two year olds should have so little freedom... but Japan... anyway)
After that I had to frantically get ready for our craft and activity time. Usually I do that during my co-teacher's lesson, but this year there are too many wiggly kids, and my third co-teacher tries to help but because we have so many kid she also has too much she needs to do during that time... After that, we get ready for lunch. Got a lot of kids this year who refuse to eat anything but rice. More than usual. So lunch is pretty much us standing to observe and sneaking quick bites of our own lunches when we can between helping kids eat and encouraging them to eat a teeny tiny bite of literally anything besides rice.
Then they play. We have to take them to the bathroom, clean the tables and chairs, clean the floor, pack away the lunches, change the diapers, log information about lunch and daily activities in their individual notebooks, help the kids pack their bags, and refill their water bottles, while watching them play. Then we do a gross motor activity, then we read a storybook, and then the kids go to nap time.
It's four hours of constantly moving, talking, standing, squatting. Never sitting, lol. Now we do our best to convince the kids sleep is a good idea. I stay through part of my "break" finishing those notebooks. Then I go do my cleaning duty. Then I go to the computer and fill out the required report on our day. Then I have to do 20 assessments, go through all the photos we've taken so far to make scrapbooks of 24 photos for all 20 kids, organize all their crafts and worksheets into the scrapbook, review and upload our class time videos for the parents, plan events, go shopping for materials, make the materials for the next craft, write the newsletter for the parents, and create my lesson plan for next month. I have an hour to do this. I am not being paid for this hour. (Also it's often not even a full hour, but 30 min here, 15 min there.) It is so fucking impossible lol. And the assessment and stuff, it's worse because it's redundant as well as ridiculous. We JUST assessed the same sort of stuff in the kids' progress reports less than a month ago, and now we have to do it all over again with very slight variation for every single kid, AND this assessment will be used to evaluate the kids' readiness for next level, which is just silly because the majority of those who haven't reached certain benchmarks yet will have reached them by the end of the year... utterly silly.
So during this hour I do as much of that as I can, which today meant I did the reports, did some lesson planning, and managed to finish ONE assessment. I have sooo much left to do. When when when. Where is the time for it. I'm not paid a salary. I'm hourly. They literally expect me to do it on my unpaid breaks and whatnot. And it's not even stuff that can be accomplished in an hour - especially when everyone else also needs to accomplish the same things, we're all off duty at the same time, and first come first serve at the computers haha.
Now that hours up, so I go to wake the kids, all 1-3 yos, from their nap. One of the kids throws a tantrum, so my co-teacher takes him outside. They're gone for fifteen minutes, which is precious time right now because there is, again, so much to do. Wake all the kids, get them in their shoes, sitting at the table, drinking their water. Clean up their futons. Take their temperatures. Document stuff in their notebooks agaaaain. Hand out allergy snacks. Hand out home snacks. Hand out school snacks. Check everything off on a plethora of checklists. As they finish, wipe their hands and faces, make them drink more water, help them clean up, check their diapers, change their diapers, watch them play, send them home with their parents or to extracurriculars, clean up the crumbs, clean up the tables and chairs, clean the floor, vacuum, clean up the garbage, watch the kids play.
Because the co-teacher is gone for 15 minutes, I'm the only one, the ONLY one, taking care of all the kids who are eating. I have a kid who will stuff his mouth so full of food that he'll start to choke, so I have to diligently give him one bite at a time until he's finished, in between cleaning. There are two other teachers in charge of diapers and the notebooks (who for some reason just didn't do the notebooks today?? I'm not really sure what happened there). It's supposed to be two and two, so there's no one to help me. I have to do all the cleaning, wiping, diaper-checking, and breaking down by myself. By the time my co-teacher comes back, she's off duty. So I have to deal with tantrum kid too, whose current mood is "say no to everything." He screams while I desperately try to put away all the tables so there's room for kids to walk, and sweep the floor so they don't have to walk on squashed grapes and cake. Between doing all the overseeing and cleaning myself, I was on my feet doing physical stuff for 55 minutes. Usually we're cleaned up in 40 minutes. Ah, there's that 15 minutes. (Not my co-teacher's fault though - the kid needed to be taken care of. It's just that we're expected to do SO MUCH in a single hour.) Also it's really freaking hot, and yeah we use AC, but there's a lot of bodies in the room and when I checked the thermostat, some alien person had set it to 25. I was like nope nope 23, 23 it is. Suddenly the room was a lot more bearable (9_9)
So now I can FINALLY sit down with the kids who are playing. It is literally four minutes till clock out time. I find a kid who threw a fit about changing his diaper, who I'd managed, while cleaning up, to cajole into doing it by himself. He had put his diaper on backwards. I tried to fix it, he tried to run away, he fell and started to cry. This is that kid with the hypersensitive parents I've mentioned before. Guess when his mom decides to arrive? Yup, just that moment.
She acts fine, I fix his diaper, he stops crying and goes off happily. When I go to clock out, I see mom changing his entire outfit. The parents have told us that if their kid sweats, we need to change his clothes. We already change kids' clothes if they get wet or are sweaty. Today we didn't go outside because it's too hot. Their kid didn't get particularly sweaty staying inside. His shirt wasn't wet at all. But the mom changed all his clothes. I am bracing myself to hear about it tomorrow.
But I keep thinking. When the hell was I going to think to change this not sweaty kid's clothes?? At what point during the day did I have a moment to do anything except frantically run around doing as much as I possibly can? I have not sat down all day except to work through my break. I've eaten nothing but a little bit of rice myself because lunch time was so busy. I'm exhausted, hungry, and hot. Someone give me a break to change my sweaty clothes, lol!
I want to do everything possible to keep the kids happy and healthy but I absolutely have no idea when I or my coteachers had a moment to think about anything not 100% essential. I'm just fried.
I felt a little... not vindicated, but seen, I guess, the other week after some leaders came for yearly observations, and their feedback was that our class is doing great, but I'm doing too much. They really encouraged my coteachers to help me more. And while I am most DEFINITELY doing waaaay too much, it's also too much to expect more of co-teachers, because the veteran teacher is also doing a lot more than she should be, and the rookie has only been here a month. She's trying but she hasn't developed the skill for behavior management yet, and she doesn't know how to anticipate what I'm doing. Plus I know she is EXHAUSTED everyday. Last Friday she was so anemic that she had to go lie down and I stayed late to cover her shift. I don't blame her one bit. This is too busy and fast-paced a school for a first-timer learning the ropes. I'm glad it wasn't my first school. She is working really hard and doing so well, and my other co-teacher is amazing. It's none of our fault we just have TOO MUCH WORK, not enough time, and not enough staff.
I'm just counting the days until Obon break, ugh.
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last EP for Max
I. You Know You're Right…
Oh, let me tell you about my friend Max. (This is a terrible and trite way to start, and I'll make it worse by critiquing it. Just go-)
Before I start waxing poetic, I need to write down and solidify it -- Max died last weekend. Got a terse copy-paste message from Morrie late on Sunday while having a slightly hazy soak and was unprepared to respond or process, though I think it'd have been the same either way -- I drained the tub and hoped it was a bad bit and then I sat there and read it again and logged into facebook for the first time in months to check -- that same message, posted by Morrie. No thoughts but all the thoughts and no clear way to start sifting.
Had to tell Darci, Sam, Ian, Jayme -- who else still knew him? How long since we talked -- a few weeks, a short exchange. Not really given him much time lately. Wary of him around Easter, I guess, given the several years where he explicitly said he had and expected trouble with Easter. But a month ago, he was sending me songs again, I could've been more encouraging. Could've done a lot of things, though here we are now. Several years since our last Christmas Tea, sitting outside at his parents' house like we did twenty years ago and waxing philosophic like on everything. Admonishing myself, but we'd shared kind words through last year, and the last thing he said to me wasn't an angry plea to take his scattered religious proselytizing seriously, met by my exasperated final silence. Not that it helps. Not sure why I mention it.
I did want him to have the miracle intercession, though in my version jesus wasn't really involved. He believed in me in ways I didn't quite understand or consider, with the distance between us in our adult lives he did mythologize me some. He would ask me to expound on his new music and post whatever I said as an earnest review next to it. Believed in us as collaborators on some grand project. Again, visions differ but the premise wasn't wrong. Always wanted my opinions, validation -- sometimes I couldn't or wouldn't summon the words. I didn't humour the evangelical glossolalia, prophetic-riffing, apocalyptic warnings. Left those mostly ignored, until he hurled insults, disappeared offline or needed to be blocked momentarily. But he was an old friend, so I'd talk to him again sometime.
Old friend, and friend who opened up some doors for me -- pit me against his other teenage-clever music-snob friend Ian, thrilled to have me meet his new girlfriend Jayme, who eventually added me to Darci's msn. So, at least three more of my all-time favourite humans. Old friend undersells it. Used to be, we understood each other.
II. They're Selling Postcards of the Hanging…
He said we met in a computer lab talking about Heavier Than Heaven. That's probably right. There's going to be some trite details mixed in here, we were small town teen outsiders with the same amount of perspective and self-awareness as any of our peers who in retrospect likely also felt the same mutual unintelligibility with us. But there was an us and we were of course doomed to find kinship with extremely obvious and cringeworthy pop culture obsessions -- it was what, 2002? Small town, casual bigotry to be pointed at everywhere you look, so of course Kurt Cobain was extremely Ours and we had some dumb notions about what that meant, re: ownership, ditto to Bright Eyes, ditto Elliott Smith, ditto The Strokes, ditto any classic music that 13/14 year olds are presumably to this day still finding and immediately getting snobbish and weird about shortly after discovery. Stay up all night and listen to the White Album, eventually just dropping the needle back at the start of Glass Onion over and over until it's no longer funny. I wasn't big on (read: would need to be picked up in a panic) sleepovers as a kid, but I'd stay up until dawn with Max. Rent old movies, read new-age books and Linda Goodman's Love Signs horoscopes for the 70s, never go to bed, run across Highway 97 to McDonalds for breakfast, crash on the trampoline or I'd shuffle back home down the trail. I was and still am pretty guided by proximity for friendship, and I do have to acknowledge living a walkable distance even when sleep deprived helped this nonsense happen.
The summer before had been the summer I pretty much stayed home, after having what was some sort of panic attack avoiding the middle school grad dance (due in part to a girl writing a full two pages in my yearbook.) Anyway we met before that in the middle school computer lab and then he was pretty quick to determine high school was not built for him, so the only memory I have of him on high school grounds is that he was wandering around in a floral dress either thrifted or borrowed from the theatre props department, basically begging to be beat up or cause a scene or an incident, at least be confronted, have insults spat in his face. Wanted to be looked at or get a rise out of people or a little attention but also had a self-righteous edge I couldn't exactly hate.
A few years later we were walking up Peach Orchard Road with some friends, but spaced out enough on the hill that it was just Max and I walking on the shoulder when a purple windstar full of drunk assholes pulled up beside us, rolled the windows down, and then jeered 'What are you guys, fags?' and Max, without missing a beat, replied (gleefully? matter-of-factly, certainly) 'Yep!' -- so we had to run into the bushes when these dudes started getting out of the minivan, and then had to run again when it circled back around when we found the road again, finally up town at the Macs we caught our breath and Max started throwing rocks at things behind the minimart and cursing the stupid rednecks in the stupid redneck town and I probably yelled at him for almost getting us killed. Does this story stick with me as a go-to example of Max being needlessly provocative and impulsive? Had he actually done anything wrong -- could've gotten us hurt, but should I have faulted him for confronting drunk idiots with their drunken idiocy? Think it sticks because I was wrong, timid. Should've gleefully replied with him, if I could do it again.
III. And if you wouldn't mind, I would like to lose…
If you knew him even vaguely, you knew Max was a musician -- he instinctively knew the magic of music in a way I can still only nod my head off-time to, a gifted sorcerer able to tap into one of the mysterious fonts that power the human world. My sensibilities really started to diverge from his, he wrote a lot of what I'd call sloppy, punky, conceptually ironic garbage that was clever but not like, really my thing, but also he wrote a lot of songs. So many songs. Always writing songs. Spent time on all kinds of larks in all kinds of styles, in between searching for the mythical, prototypical, platonic 'Hit' -- both a cynical ear for a (usually) pop-punk earworm and an earnest pursuit of a legitimizing artifact that would make him the guy who wrote that song. He wrote a lot of these! I remember many pretty fondly. I hope they're all somewhere spread between the many different bandcamps and soundclouds he sometimes seemed to meticulously populate and de-populate and remix and rework and delete. Anyway, he felt like he was meant to make something great. That was some of the meaning he could create. Always had that in common and I know he was more serious about it than I’ve been. He let himself write and record, and tinker, ideas wriggling out and writhing free.
I think we loved Kurt Cobain for slightly different reasons. Max romanticized drugs, death and self-destruction. He was telling anyone who would listen, aged 14, that he was going to die young. I was around to watch him continue to shovel mushrooms into his mouth waiting for them to have any kind of effect on him long after the other people doing mushrooms had settled in for the night. He stayed curiously close to sober despite his best efforts and we watched over the rest. I was a square well into my twenties but that never seemed to be anything resembling an issue when we were spending all that time hanging out, even when he was chain smoking weed trying to find some level of comfortable high. Think we smoked together once many years later and it wasn't particularly our most amazing adventure. (I'm inclined to give that award either to taking the camcorder out with Ian at 2am to go interview a security guard at Action Fest and ask him what scares him most about people and who his favourite Beatle was, or whatever was going on the night we all founded The Boatmen, who played one show, blessedly without me there, as I am no musician.)
It is extremely tempting to start asking what if or say I should've, I'm looking for answers to a matter that is now settled and what remains is to accept that what happened was what happens when people grow up and move elsewhere and meet new people and do new things, and staying it touch is hard in the best circumstances, particularly when the more self-destructive of the two of us was, in his late teens, blowing up most of his friendships with unpredictable and sometimes volatile behaviour. Again, he could be provocative and confrontational to friend and foe alike. But as I said above, used to be, we understood each other, and I've only met so many people and found that to be the case.
Saw him a few times as though summoned, randomly ran into him one time on a skytrain platform in Vancouver when I was there for a weekend, much to the discomfort of the other friends from High School I was with. Saw him a few times after that. I don't remember exactly when he first told me had been institutionalized, or kicked out of the house, in whichever order. Had the cops called on him for preaching in the street, had his first run-in with mood stabilizers and doctors and finding god, then losing track of god, moving back to the coast to make music and continue dabbling with his romantic, often destructive notions. He'd reappear online with new music to share, good news about a girl, or cool new friends, new living situation, sounding like he'd found something to believe in. There was something of a cycle emerging and I know he knew, but what could I do? Keep in touch, at least a bit.
IV. Say, Fate, my friend, you say the strangest things…
Doctors, or somebody, told him it was schizophrenia. It's not uncommon to have delusions of grandeur, or messianic ideation, when there's a lot of conflicting information in your head. And that's probably more or less what happened for a few Easters, things sounding properly apocalyptic and disastrous and the fate of the world hanging in the balance if only people (myself included) would listen and take what he was saying seriously.
But. I think I should say something else about Max and faith. In between the times when he would come up seemingly lucid, energized, hopeful and making new music, he would, invariably start getting into religion, religions, spirituality, esoteric philosophy. Always sort of into religion, like a cult leader or a rockstar might be, making something means something. But he was a philosopher of a more desperate sort-- there had to be a meaning. He already believed himself doomed by the narrative at 14, but without the peak of whatever sort of success would do, there wasn't really a tragedy. Had to teach and spread the word and form something to believe in. So I understand why he was intermittently obsessed with being a priest, or a preacher, or rabbi, iman, shaman, anyone who knows something about why any of this is how it is, who could find meaning in any and all of the old teachings and finally become a prophet.
I was pretty anxious and prayer happy as a child, but since then I've been various levels of actively antagonistic to the power wielded and perverted by religions but always just apathetic to notions of gods or heavens, things I don't think will affect how I want or choose to live. This obviously infuriated Max, when he was in his believer moods. He as much as told me that he wanted, firstly, to riff and banter with me like we were still insomniac teens. Second, he wanted me to cross-examine or support and scaffold his ideas, confirm and accept the visions and versions of Big-T Truth -- make it make sense by weighing in. My opinion still mattered even if the version of me in his head was a decade out of date. Third, he wanted to save me too. So often, I'd stop talking because he'd write several page screeds in faux-KJV diction that I just couldn't parse -- scripture, free association, tangents, crudely spelled verbal puns, digressions referencing things I had no point of reference for -- I'm not sure what state he was ever in, to be honest. I talk about the cycle he was in, but I can only really track how he was behaving toward me in our messages, over the course of weeks and months and then these last fifteen years.
Anyway, I'd stop responding and the tone would change to an angry concern for my soul, an appeal to our bond in youth, then insults, then silence on one or both sides and then I would essentially wait to hear from him. Sounding contrite, almost. With new music to share. Sometimes asking me about myself.
One of the last times we met and talked for tea he declared that he'd never had schizophrenia, not really. Hadn't even really meant to be institutionalized, it was a misunderstanding, it was an overreaction, and it had been haunting and unwinding his life since he was 19. He could often be so self aware, I don't remember what I managed to say in response. Something hopeful, I hope. He made a few interesting declarations over the years. I hoped for something. Something interrupting. That we would, as we agreed once, be old men meeting for tea to talk. I'd always take his finding meaning and comfort over his finding peace, for what it's worth.
V. There must be some way out of here, said the joker to the thief…
One more embarrassing teen angst adjacent anecdote. I don't exactly know how it came up. It was a field trip somewhere and we were at A&W I believe, because I remember getting a root beer milkshake and hating it, and also showing Dru something in my wallet, next to the little picture of Gumby I put in the photo panel, a tiny printed slip of the lyrics to All Along the Watchtower. Did she even ask? Anyway, I remember explaining that yes, I still talked to Max. And maybe then I revealed the little card-- it was in there for Max. We were the joker and the thief. Think I had to bullshit an explanation there because I didn’t and still don't remember when or why we had decided that, maybe it was a single joke one time late into the evening listening to Bob. Anyway, nobody else knew I was carrying those lyrics around for as long as I had that wallet. I don't even remember which one of us was which.
Least of my sorrows, but at least one I can properly name.
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Hi, before I explain my post, I want to say something important.
• What you see my blog has become a major overhaul. And despite the changes, I decided that my 2nd account will be now my artwork blog with a secret twist.
⚠️NEW RULE!⚠️
⚠️ SO PLEASE DO NOT SHARE MY 2nd ACCOUNT TO EVERYONE! THIS SECRECY BLOG OF MINE IS FOR CLOSES FRIENDS ONLY!⚠️
• AND FOR MY CLOSES FRIENDS, DON’T REBLOG IT. INSTEAD, JUST COPY MY LINK AND PASTE IT ON YOUR TUMBLR POST! JUST BE SURE THE IMAGE WILL BE REMOVED AND THE ONLY LEFT WAS THE TEXT.
⚠️ SHARING LINKS, LIKE POSTS, REBLOG POSTS, STEALING MY SNAPSHOT PHOTOS/RECORDED VIDEOS/ARTWORKS (a.k.a. ART THIEVES) OR PLAGIARIZING FROM UNKNOWN TUMBLR STRANGERS WILL IMMEDIATELY BE BLOCKED, RIGHT AWAY!⚠️
Okay? Capiche? Make sense? Good, now back to the post…↓
My 8bitdo Pro 2 Review - Part 10 (Recorded Video) [Nov 9, 2022]
Hello! Here’s Part 10 of my new 8bitdo gamepad, the Pro 2 Bluetooth Gamepad/Controller! 🎮😁
It's been a while now since May of this year, and my Pro 2 controller surpassed my old SN30 Pro+'s lifespan. Man, I really missed my old one, but then again they're very identical, in terms of design albeit my Pro 2 has bells & whistles.
So, for this part, I'm attempting to re-download the firmware updater from 8bitdo because they released a new update version for my recent Pro 2 controller. ⬆️⚙️➡️🎮 Yeah, I lost my firmware updater, so I have no problem getting it another. And damn, I didn't get a chance to show ya my macro test while playing retro games, so maybe I'll attempt it next year (2023).
BTW, if you haven't seen my posts from May 2022, then I'll provide some links down below:↓
• Part 9 [May 26, 2022]
• Part 9.5 [May 26, 2022]
So without further ado, let’s get started:
BTW: Watch my record video first.🎦🖥️
• Alright so, here I am going to this website where I download the aforementioned software. When I checked the Pro 2's update log, I noticed that there's only one firmware version 2.00. That's odd, usually that there is only 3 firmware I've seen (evidence? → [CLICK ME!]), and as of March of 2022, I've updated the v1.07 firmware for my (Pro 2) controller. Anyways, I've already downloaded the firmware update & open it. Now, this part is quite confusing, as my current firmware update was v1.08 instead of 1.07. When did I get the v1.08 when my current firmware update was 1.07? 🤔 8bitdo probably made some little bit adjustment, I suppose? 🤨 Anyways, I decided to update their recent update, which is v2.00. Feel free to read the listing patches. And once it's done, my Pro 2 will automatically disconnect & reconnect after the completion of the firmware update. I could double-check the current firmware, and I noticed that there's literally one version, it used to have 3 firmware updates. So yeah, that's pretty strange to me.😕
• Nonetheless, let's go straight through our trusted gamepad-tester website. I reconnected my Pro 2 via my included USB type C cable to work properly. 🖥️🎮 All the buttons are functional, including my current mapped-out back buttons, and finally the analog sticks. The latter is no longer random numbers when they're centered. Even when I try to move slightly with my two thumbs, the analog joysticks are patched from the firmware version 2.00. Then again, the deadzones for the joysticks are literally the same accuracy as before. And when I tested GTA V online, nothing much to say.
(Little) Overall:
• `I'm quite happy with their firmware update 2.00 for my Pro 2 gamepad, but at the same time it riddled me where are the other firmware versions at? 🤔 It'll be better if they have different firmware versions to choose from, much like my old SN30 Pro+ gamepad. 🎮 Here's hoping, that the company itself will get to fix.
BTW:
#1 - Did you know the Pro 2 had released two new colors albeit transparency? They're totally rad, and you should check them out right here → [CLICK ME!].
#2 - Also, new controllers are also available such as the Lite 2, the Lite SE, and two configurations of the Ultimate Controller. The Bluetooth & the 2.4 GHz variant (aka Windows version). To check out the entire products by 8Bitdo, then please [CLICK ME!].
Well, that’s all for now. If you haven’t seen my previous parts of the same item, as well as my previous 8bitdo review items, then I’ll provide some links down below.↓😉
My 8bitdo USB Wireless Adapter ‘PS Classic Edition’:
• Opening parcel [Aug 27, 2020]
• Part 1 [Aug 28, 2020]
• Part 2 [Aug 28, 2020]
• Part 3 (Recorded video) [Aug 28, 2020]
• Part 4 (Recorded Video) [Aug 28, 2020]
• Part 5 (Recorded Video) [Aug 28, 2020]
• Part 6 (Recorded Video) [Oct 20, 2020]
• Part 7 (Recorded Video) [Oct 28, 2020]
• Part 8 (Recorded Video) [Nov 14, 2020]
• Part 9 (Recorded Video) [Nov 14, 2020]
• Part 10 [Final] (Recorded Video) [Nov 16, 2020]
• Extra Part / Final Plus [Nov 25, 2020]
My 8bitdo SN30 Pro+ gamepad:
• Unopened parcel [Nov 3, 2020]
• Opening parcel (Recorded Video) [Nov 3, 2020]
• Part 1 [Nov 19, 2020]
• Part 1.5 [Nov 19, 2020]
• Part 2 [Nov 27, 2020]
• Part 2.5 [Nov 27, 2020]
• Part 3 [Dec 1, 2020]
• Part 4 [Dec 3, 2020]
• Part 5 [Dec 8,2020]
• Part 6 [Dec 11,2020]
• Part 7 [Dec 20, 2020]
• Part 8 [Jan 19, 2021]
• Part 9 [Mar 27, 2021]
• Part 10 [Mar 27, 2021]
• Part 10.5 [Mar 27, 2021]
• Part 11 (w/ 8bitdo’s Ultimate Software ver. 2.0) [May 11, 2021]
• Part 12 [Jun 3, 2021]
• Part 12.5 [Jun 3, 2021]
• Part 13 [Jul 31, 2021]
• Part 14 [Aug 17, 2021]
• Part 15 (Macros mapping - 1st attempt) [Oct 9, 2021]
• Part 16 (Macros mapping - 2nd attempt) [Oct 9, 2021]
• Part 17 (Serious problem after testing) [Oct 10, 2021]
• Part 18 (Equipped w/ Panasonic Eneloop AA Batteries) [Oct 18, 2021]
• Part 19 (Final) [Nov 9, 2021]
My 8bitdo SN30 Pro 2 gamepad:
• Unopening parcel [Oct 28, 2021]
• Opening parcel (Recorded Video) [Oct 29, 2021]
• Part 1 [Dec 2, 2021]
• Part 2 (Recorded Video) [Dec 4, 2021]
• Part 3 [Feb 21, 2022]
• Part 4 [Feb 26, 2022]
• Part 5 [Mar 4, 2022]
• Part 6 [Mar 6, 2022]
• Part 7 [Mar 22, 2022]
• Part 8 [Mar 22, 2022]
• Part 9 [May 26, 2022]
• Part 9.5 [May 26, 2022]
Tagged: @bryan360, @carmenramcat, @leapant
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Dont mind me just dumping my 2.5/5 star review of s1x of cr0w5 here because i need to get this off my chest 😭
I consider myself a very average person in the sense that i, more often than not, like what’s popular. Usually i agree with the majority and even when i don’t, i still see the appeal and just go, “ok, not for me.” But this book was terrible. I fail to see what people actually like about it…… and it’s not like i picked it up because of the rave reviews, my sister let me borrow it because she liked it. I didn’t check other ratings or reviews at all, so when i finally finished it (a feat in and of itself) and went to log it onto my goodreads, i was shocked by how much love it received lol. Yes i am 27 but i still do like YA, so that wasn’t the issue here
Starting with the good: i think b4rdug0 did decently with her prose and worldbuilding, settings and people were described well enough that i wasn’t TOO confused. That and w¥lan and j3sp3r’s banter were the only things i liked.
Getting it out of the way that although i would’ve preferred them to be aged up, it’s not really something i cared about much. A lot of the people who didn’t like the book complained about this, but other than them having too much experience for the years they have lived on this planet, i just shrugged it off because eh, it’s YA. Ofc there will be some sort of power fantasy involving teens.
For the plot, i was so excited for it because heists are fun and it’s amazing when the tension is set up right!!! Alas, everything was too conveniently resolved. Just as you think the tension can finally be built, the scene is over. Or something is happening omg, and then you’re hit with a flashback that completely takes you out of it. Don’t even know what the stakes were for this operation. It sucks how predictable a lot of the conflicts were :’) the appeal of a heist is when you don’t know what will happen, when you’re a hair’s breadth from getting caught but you don’t.. didn’t feel that at all here. It almost felt like they just waltzed in and out
The characters felt SO flat to me. Some of them felt like caricatures while the others were simply trying too hard to be edgy, and some felt like an afterthought (ahem, w¥lan). None of them are likable, which is fine i don’t need to like characters honestly, but unlikable to the point of me not being invested in them at all. I didn’t care what happened to any of them. Their relationships with each other don’t feel important enough, and then they’re all paired up… huh? I don’t care enough about nin4 x matth14s, the author didn’t care enough about j3sper x w¥lan. In3j and k4z would’ve been ok if the author set it up well enough. It would’ve been nicer if it were a bit more of a slow burn, perhaps their relationship picking up in the second book. WHY did she have to force it to happen in the first?????? It felt so out of character honestly, like you set up k4z that way and then you tell me he acts like this…… if there were moments prior wherein k4z would act contrary to how people thought he was then it would’ve been believable. But legitimately his behavior blindsided me lol.
Nin4 being plus sized could’ve been handled better too. Oh i like eating, i’m indecently round (LIKE WHAT IS THIS), my jugs are big. What in the world
The use of foreign language feels… kinda forced and clunky? I’m all for worldbuilding, and it’s great that there’s diversity in this fictional world, but the foreign languages aren’t used in any way that furthers the narrative. It’s jarring, like when someone is speaking in an american english accent and then says croissant as cwahsahn. D
Anyway i’m surprised i finished it. Had to skim the last 50 pages because i just wanted to see how it would end. Kinda expected the “twist” unfortunately. Also i cannot take anyone named p3kk4 r0llin5 seriously as a villain lmao
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FAQ: REVIEWING THE CHARTS
Hi, i'm cactus, I maintain a primarily chart music-based review blog that is direly unsuccessful. I figured that I'd take the time today to note down some answers to some questions about me and my blog series REVIEWING THE CHARTS that mean I don't have to explain things week by week and new readers can have everything in a nice comfy place.
Q: What is your real name?
cactus. As far as you know I was Christened cactus, so call me cactus.
Q: Why the UK Singles Chart?
The UK is the country I unfortunately live in and as a result I know the most about its popular music traditions and trends. Additionally, it's also the country whose pop music affects me the most, i.e. listening to the radio or talking to friends and family about music.
Q: Why the UK Top 75?
For years I have covered the top 75 instead of the top 100 and this isn't so that I have less work to do. I used to cover just the top 40, but I expanded this into the top 75 in 2020. This is because, firstly, acharts.co is a pretty cool website and secondly, the British Market Research Bureau, considered to reflect the "official chart" during its existence by the Official Charts Company, had a top 75 for a moment. This was in response to rival record industry publications publishing top 100 charts, and therefore I decided to stick to the top 75, because if there's anything that represents the UK to me, it's trying to one-up your rivals doing something objectively better than you by being only 25% less inadequate.
Q: You're just a Spectrum Pulse rip-off.
That's not a question and yes, yes I am. Except with somehow even worse takes (love you Mark).
Q: Do you ever talk about anything else?
No. And I never will. On a serious note, whilst I do pride myself in how my chart review episodes go into... weirder territory than most chart reviewers, I don't often talk about non-charting music on this blog. I do have a RateYourMusic account however, and in my listening logs, I talk about music I listen to inside and outside of the charts as well as some movies. You can see those at the account exclusivelytopostown.
On this blog, outside of the UK Singles Chart, I've also done a vintage year-end 'best hits' list these past two years for years in the 2000s, using the Billboard Hot 100, and I'll probably end up doing the same this year. I've also talked about SpongeBob and will have a Pokémon-related post out in the next month, and honestly I want to broaden the scope of this blog sooner more than later. However, this is primarily still a weekly chart review blog and will stay that way for a while.
Q: Why Tumblr?
I started it on Tumblr, I'll end it on Tumblr.
Q: When does this series end?
When I or Lewis Capaldi dies.
Q: When will you die?
(checks diary) Tuesday the 6th.
Q: Why should I read your blog?
Because what other angry lesbian talking about the nuances of D-Block Europe could you possibly find on the Internet?
Thank you for reading and I hope you enjoy whatever else you end up reading on here.
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2024 Reading - Completed Book 1/12
Here's to the first check-in of the year regarding my reading NY resolution!
I just finished The Memory Keeper's Daughter (401 pages) last night.
Maybe I'm cheating a bit, since I began this book last year - technically I didn't read the whole book in 2024. But I read the majority of it in 2024, and one of my sub-goals was to complete this book as part of my 2024 reading so...I say it counts.
I grabbed this book from the thrift store a few months back, though family drama isn't normally something I reach for. I remember the hype around this book when I was younger, but didn't know what it was about. I read the synopsis and the premise seemed interesting.
Sad, but interesting.
So I took a chance on it. It was good! The ending was bittersweet, but satisfying. I'd say if you have interest in watching the aftermath from a difficult decision/secret play out, and how multiple lives are affected over the course of many years, this is a good read.
I don't intend to give like, full on reviews in these posts. I've never been good at giving concise thoughts about media I've consumed. I wish it was a skill I had, but I've never been satisfied with reviews I've attempted writing before.
I do have a Goodreads account where I know I've posted a couple reviews before. I just tried logging in but the site says NONE of my emails have an account...so that may be a lost cause lol. Not sure what happened there. I'll keep trying. Part of me is self conscious and wants to delete them lol!
But yeah, I mainly wanted to celebrate completing my first book of the year!
My goal is to read at least one book a month, totaling 12 books by the end of the year.
However, this is not a limit, just the goal I'd like to reach. I actually went to the thrift store and grabbed a few more books that I'm excited to read. So I'm definitely going to be starting on a new one here soon, well before February begins.
One down, (at least) eleven more to go! x
---
Total books read: 1
Total pages read: 401
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