#no wonder there are so many lesbian and bi girls on twitter and tumblr now!!!! it just. warms my old dyke heart lol

[ingravinoveritas]

Why are people begging for Anna and Georgia to be in GO?! I’m genuinely wondering why cause they don’t fit in their world and if they were there, it wouldn’t be the Ineffable Husbands anymore, it would just be like a family reunion. Also, people wanting the girls to show up in GO as lesbian lovers to each other?? When have they ever been seen or hinted at any sort of affection towards one another? Georgia can barely stand her and Anna is….. meh. Barely on social media except only to post one occasional thing of Good Omens and then disappears into the night. Neil asking if Dottie and Sadie should show up in the next season and people asking if Georgia and Anna can play them…. It’s ironic cause the question was if Aziraphale should have a beard in season 3 and Neil took it as beards, someone used as a romantic partner to cover up the others sexuality. Veryyy interesting to see. Do you think Neil saying Sadie and Dottie are beards and people mentioning Georgia and Anna to play them means something?

It's honestly difficult to know where to start with this, because I have also noticed the uptick in people campaigning for Georgia and AL to be in season 3, apropos of seemingly nothing at all. There seems to be an assumption that Georgia and AL have the same kind of chemistry as David and Michael, when nothing could be further from the truth. By Georgia's own admission, she barely knew AL when the first season of Staged was filmed, and the entire "best friend" dynamic between them was faked.

A few years later, you have Staged season 3, where Georgia dyed her hair red to differentiate herself from AL since everyone kept saying they looked exactly the same. You also have a clearly established "throuple" dynamic between Michael, David, and Georgia that AL Is not at all a part of (and has seemingly been specifically excluded from), and Georgia only engaging with AL on social media when there is something to promote (such as Staged 3 being released on the BBC, to give a recent example) or on posts related to "business" things (Georgia commented on AL's new headshots, but not on the post for Mabli's first birthday, to give another example). Not to mention AL copying Georgia's personality and posting style at every available turn, because she desperately wants to obtain the same level of clout that Georgia has in the fandom. (This, despite Michael seemingly having faded her from his social media/any sort of public connection to her entirely.)

(Also, none of this even touches on what I mentioned in this post, about the sheer audacity in suggesting that AL and Georgia could play Aziraphale and Crowley, respectively, or how insulting that is to Michael and David...)

Now, however, we have this whole "Dottie and Sadie" business to contend with, which is on a level of ridiculousness I'm not sure I knew existed. Context, for those who may not know: "Dottie and Sadie" refers to Aziraphale and Crowley's fictional wives, which Neil started alluding to as part of his exasperated answers to questions on Tumblr. They are not real characters and have nothing to do with the GO novel itself. But it seems the fans have taken the idea of AL and Georgia as Dottie and Sadie and run with it.

Anna (who apparently has also started copying Georgia's habit of searching her own name on Twitter) has now added to the discourse with this QT today:

I'm truly baffled as to how so many people don't seem to see this for the attention grab that it is. This is a clear attempt at remaining relevant, as well as her trying to push her way into GO season 3. Yet it's telling that the part she is seemingly lobbying for is for a character that doesn't even exist, and has no bearing on the GOmens universe whatsoever.

What also bothers me (and I've heard this from a few people who've DMed me as well) is that this very much comes across as "straight girl making out with a friend as a joke." For all we know, AL could be bi, but she has shared so little of herself/shown no outward support for the LGBTQ+ community as to make it impossible to determine. Also the last thing Michael and David have ever done is play what is between them/Aziraphale and Crowley for laughs, so the fact that their connection and experience with their own queerness is so genuine only makes this comment from AL look incredibly fake, and like she is trying to be a pale imitation of them.

But again...and perhaps the most unintentionally hilarious part of all this...is AL apparently missing the entire point that Dottie and Sadie are beards. By saying she wants to play such a role, she is reinforcing the idea that she is only there to make Michael look straight, and that that is the purpose of their relationship. For as calculated as all of her posts/replies are, this almost feels like her accidentally telling the truth in the midst of a bunch of nonsense. Like you said: Very interesting...

I have more thoughts on GO season 3/the casting of family members--Peter worked well in GO 2, Ty did not--to share in my forthcoming analysis of the second season (I'm rewatching all of the episodes right now just to get everything fresh in my mind, but I will start writing/turn Anons back on soon), so I will end this here. But those are my thoughts on all these recent developments. Just hoping that all the fandemonium (fan pandemonium) dies down and we can have an honest discussion about season 3 one of these days...

#phantomstars24 #reply post #good omens #michael sheen #welsh seduction machine #david tennant #soft scottish hipster gigolo #georgia tennant #trying to provide a balanced perspective #but the obsession folks in the fandom have with georgia and al is really ott at times #also AL accidentally confirming she is Michael's beard may be the only good thing about this #i don't even know anymore #fandom woes #anna lundberg #discourse

[escapekissed]

@nvenes : [reblogs korra gifs]

me: [yodels in homosexual]

#i was one of the first people on the korrasami train. i watched season 1 and the SECOND asami was introduced i was like THEYRE WIVES #i never expected it to become canon but every time i think about that i just. i smile for the teen girl that wanted it so badly #bubbline becoming canon feels way too surreal to me bc like. i bought the scream queens book #it felt like they did everything to friendzone these two #and then it became canon #and like. garnet exists #and luz and amity #and catradora #and literally every cw show even tho they all suck #i cant imagine how it must feel growing up as a little girl who likes girls and have so many ways u can imagine urself finding love #and i'm so happy animation has come so far! and i'm so grateful to the wlw behind the scenes that made this happen tbh #no wonder there are so many lesbian and bi girls on twitter and tumblr now!!!! it just. warms my old dyke heart lol #i'm only 24 but so much has changed in my llifetime! #i was out before gay marriage was legal in the states! #just thinking about everthing that has happened since then. crazy

[adorpheus]

on fujoshi and fetishization

Lately, more and more, both here on tumblr and on other sites, I keep seeing people spew unfiltered hatred at fujoshi - that is, women who like mlm content such as gay fanfic and fanart featuring men with other men. And I don’t mean like a specific type of fujoshi, like the ones who are genuinely being weird about it, but just like a general hatred for girls (but especially straight identifying girls) who express love for gay romance.

I hate to break this to you all, but women (including straight women!) actually are allowed to like mlm fanfiction and fanart, even enthusiastically so. A woman simply expressing her love of gay fanfic, even if it is in kind of a cringey way or a way that you personally don’t like, is NOT automatically fetishization.

I’ve been on the receiving end of fetishization for my entire life, from a very young age, as many black and brown folx have, so I consider myself pretty well acquainted with how it works. Fetishization isn’t just like, being really into drawings of boys kissing, or whatever the fuck y’all are trying to imply on this god forsaken site. 

Fetishization is complicated imo, and can encompass a lot of things, such as (but not limited to):

1 - dehumanization, e.g. viewing a group of people as sexual objects who exist purely for entertainment purposes, rather than acknowledging them as actual people who deserve respect and rights

and

2 - projecting certain assumptions onto said people based on their race/sexuality/whatever is being fetishized. These assumptions are often, but not always, sexual in nature (like the idea that black people in general are more sexual than other races, etc etc etc).

I’m going to use myself as an example to illustrate my point. Please note this isn’t the best or most nuanced example, but it is the most simplistic. A white person finding me attractive and respectfully appreciating my black features as part of what makes me beautiful is not, on its own, fetishization. A white person finding me attractive solely or mostly because I’m a PoC is now in fetishization territory. Similarly, assuming I’m dominant because of my blackness (like saying “step on me mommy” and shit like that) is hella fetishistic. 

That being said, theres definitely a difference between how fetishization works in real life with real people, and how it shows up in fandom. 

Fetishization manifests in many different ways in fandom, but most commonly on the mlm side of things, I personally see it appear as conservative (or centrist) women who love the idea of two men together, but don’t actually like gay people, and don’t necessarily think LGBT+ people deserve rights (or “special treatment” as its sometimes dog whistled). These women view queer men as sexual objects for entertainment rather than an actual group of people who deserve to be protected from systemic oppression. I’ve noticed that they often don’t even think of the men they “ship” together as actually being gay, and may even express disgust at the idea of a character in an mlm ship being headcanon’d gay. In case its not obvious, this is pretty much exactly the same way a lot of cishet men fetishize lesbians (they see “lesbian” as a porn category, rather than like, what actual LGBT people think of when we read the word lesbian). There’s a pretty popular viral tweet thread going around where someone explains seeing this trend of conservative women who like mlm stuff, and I have also personally witnessed this phenomenon myself in more than one fandom. 

The funny thing is, maybe its just me buuuut.... The place I see this particular kind of fetishization happen most is not in the anime/BL fandom, from which the term fujoshi originates - I actually see these type of women way way more in western fandom spaces like Supernatural, Harry Potter, and Hannibal. I can’t stress this enough, there’s a shocking amount of people who are like, straight up trump supporters in these fandoms. If you want to experience it, try joining a Hannigram or Destiel group on facebook and you will probably encounter one eventually especially if you happen to be living through a major historical event. Like these women probably wouldn’t even be considered “fujoshi”, because that term doesn’t really apply to them given they aren’t in the BL/anime fandom, yet they’re the ones I personally see actually doing the most harm.

Of course this isn’t the ONLY kind of fetishizing woman in the mlm/BL world, there are other ways fetishization shows up, but this is the most toxic kind that I see.

A girl just being really into BL or whatever may be “cringe” to you, or she may be expressing her love for BL in a “cringey” way, but a straight woman really enjoying BL is not, on its own, somehow inherently fetishization. Yes, sometimes teenage girls act kind of cringe about how much they like BL and that might be annoying to you, but its not necessarily ~problematic~. 

That being said, IT NEEDS BE REMARKED that a lot of the “fujoshi” that you all hate so deeply, are actually closeted trans men or nonbinary people who haven’t yet come to terms with their gender identity, or are otherwise just NOT cishet. I know because I was one of these closeted people for years, and I honestly think tumblr and the cultural obsession around purity is one of the many reasons I was closeted so deeply for so long. STORYTIME LOL!!! In my early adolescence, I was a sort of proto “fujoshi”. I identified as a bi girl who was mostly attracted to men, or as most (biphobic) people called it, “practically straight”. I wrote and read “slash” fanfic and looked at as well as drew my own fanart. We didn’t use the term fujoshi back then, but that’s definitely how I could have been described. I was obsessed with yaoi, BL, whatever you want to call it, to a cringe-inducing degree. I really struggled to relate to most het romances, so when I first discovered yaoi fanfics (as we called them at the time), I fell in love and felt like I finally found the type of romance content that was made for me. I didn’t know exactly why, I just knew it hit different. LGBT+ fanart and fanfiction brought me an immense amount of joy, and I didn’t really think too hard about why.

At some point, in my early 20s, after reading lots of discourse™ here on tumblr and other places like twitter, I started to get the sinking feeling that my passion for gay fanfiction was ~problematic~. I had always felt a sense of guilt for being into mlm content, because literally anyone who found out I liked BL (especially the men I dated) shamed me for liking it all the fucking time (which btw is literally just homophobic, like can we talk about that?). In addition to THAT bullshit, now I’m seeing posts telling me that girls who like BL are cringey gross fetishists who inspire rage and should go die? 

Let me tell you, I internalized the fuck out of messages like this. I desperately wanted to avoid being ~problematic~. At the time, I thought being problematic was like the worst thing you could be. I was terrified of being “cancelled”, before canceling was even really a thing. I thought to myself, “oh my god, I’m gross for liking this stuff? I should stop.” I beat myself up over this. I wanted so badly to be accepted, and to be deemed a Good Person by the internet and society at large.

I tried to shape up and become a good ally (lmfao). I stopped writing fanfic and deleted all the ones I was working on at the time. I made a concerted effort to assimilate into cishet culture, including trying to indulge myself more deeply in the few fandoms I could find that had het content I did enjoy (Buffy, True Blood, Pretty Little Liars, etc). I would occasionally look at BL/fanfic/etc in private, but then I would repress my interest in it and not look for a while. Instead I would look at women in straight relationships, and create extremely heterosexual Couple Goals pinterest boards, and try to figure out how I could become more like these women, so I, too, could be loved someday. 

This cycle of repression lasted like eight years. Throughout it all, I was performing womanhood to the best of my ability and trying to become a woman that was worthy of being in a relationship. I went in and out of several “straight” relationships, wondering why they didn’t make me feel the way reading fanfic did. Most of all, I couldn’t figure out why straight intimacy didn’t work for me. I just didn’t enjoy it. I always preferred looking at or making gay fanfiction/fanart over actual intimacy with men in real life. 

Eventually, I stumbled upon a trans coming out video that someone I was following posted online, my egg started to crack, and to make an extremely long story short, after like 3 years of introspection and many gender panic attacks that I still experience to this day, I realized that I’m uh... MAYBE... NOT CIS..!? :|

I truly believe if I had just been ALLOWED TO LIKE GAY STUFF WITHOUT BEING SHAMED FOR IT, I probably would have realized I was trans way way sooner. Because for me, indulging in my love of gay romance and writing gay fanfic wasn’t me being a weirdo fetishist, it was actually me exploring my own gender identity. It is what helped me come to terms with being a nonbinary trans boy.

Not everyone realizes they are trans at age 2 or whatever the fuck. Sometimes you have to go through a cringey fujoshi phase and multiple existential crises to realize how fucking gay you are AND THATS FINE.

And one more thing - can we just be real here? 

A lot of anti-fujoshi sentiment is literally just misogyny. omg please realize this. Its “women aren’t allowed to enjoy things” but, like... with gay fanfics. Some of the anti-fujoshi posts I see come across my dash are clearly ppl projecting a caricature they invented in their head of a demonic fujoshi fetishist onto any woman who expresses what they consider to be a little too much enthusiasm for gay content and then using their perception of that individual as an excuse to justify their disdain for any women, especially straight women, ‘invading’ their ~oh so exclusive~ queer fandom spaces.

 god get over yrselfs this is gatekeeping by another name

idk why i spent so long writing this no one is even going to read it, does anyone even still use this site

*EDIT: HOLY SHIT WHEN DOING RESEARCH FOR THIS POST I FOUND OUT THAT Y-GALLERY IS BACK OMG!!! 

#rant #fujoshi #I SAID WHAT I SAID #personal #gender stuff

[niuniente]

Hello Niu! I have a question. On tumblr and AO3 I see a lot of girls (probably) writing yaoi/slash fiction and do similar art. Much less amount is devoted to heterosexual relationship and least of all - to lesbians and bi. I know it’s just from fandoms I’m in but it’s statistics. Moreover, the amount of OCs involved in creations is very rare. Why? We, as women demand for more female leads and characters but we ourselves fail to create ‘em and direct our attention in mlm relationships instead

I must say that I’m not VERY deep in fanfic scenes anymore. I haven’t actively read fanfics in a decade, and I picked up just last December and now there’s only 1 fic and 1 other author I follow. 

What I can think about for reasons why this is:

Glorification of gay stuff, mainly because media wont really giving as much backstory, characteristic, emphasis etc. to female characters as to male characters. Thus, it is easy to form gay ships, because you know the male characters better and are thus more emotionally invested with them. I just saw in Twitter a post stating that shonen manga is dedicated for men, but they usually fail to give any personality, backstory etc, for their female characters, which turns all shonen male relationships more or less homoerotic. We have lots of these unnoticed rules in life; like a mother is the one who looks after the kids while dad is - at best- just mom’s little helper. This makes fathers, who are dedicated to their children and family like they should be (after all, the child is also theirs), and single fathers almost holy. In reality, father is just the other parent and should not be dismissed not glorified as a parent.

Tumblr’s toxic mentality like bi-erasure and such spreading around, making young ones afraid to make mistakes and life the wrong way. I’m not unfortunately too deep into this either, but what I know, female bi-erasure seems to stem from “ALL MEN ARE BAD AND EVIL, YOU ARE EITHER ON OUR SIDE AS A LESBIAN OR YOU ARE AN ENEMY!!! YOU CAN’T LOVE MEN!!!”-toxic mentality.

WE HATE MEN, WE HATE HETERO!-mentality also causes so much horrible stuff like, I don’t get it??? What’s wrong with being hetero or bi? Absolutely nothing! There are horrible people and toxic masculinity is a thing, but for the love of God, there are wonderful men, too - and if you ask me, we need more positive masculine men representation in media. If we had more positive masculine men in media, maybe women felt more comfortable writing about hetero and be-stuff? Question mark there as I don’t know if that would be the case. Would I mind to see more positive masculine representations like Batman, Sláine and Ken Kitano? Men who respect women, life, protect weak and play with fair rules with everyone?  Men who use whatever they have for the benefit of others and the community? Men who are soft and gentle without those natural human traits dimming their manliness? Absolutely not!

I don’t know why lesbian fics aren’t the thing. Perhaps it is a) the lack of female character’s backstories etc. over male characters and b) lack of readers?? IDK really.

Mary Sues have been grimaced over as long as I have been in the different fandoms. Which is, frankly, absolutely ridiculous. When people are afraid to self-insert and create OCs, they bend their favorite characters into their own representation. That leads to absolutely unnecessary fandom wars and also OOC fics, where the character X is almost unrecognizable because it is just the authors OC/self representation in disguise. There have been many fics I have not been able to read because the character or characters were so much of author’s self-insert of themselves and I couldn’t connect with them. With OCs, it would have been a different story, literally and figuratively. (is that wrong to bend characters into self-insert? No. Can people write however they want? Yes. Can people “own” the characters as “This is like me so don’t disagree with what they do or be because then you are attacking me personally!”. No. Like, find representation, yes, but remember that character X is not you or yours. Only your OCs are yours and you have power to tell others what you want with them or not.)

Because OCs are very personal and readers have no emotional connection to them, many skip OC fics because of this. It’s a shame and doesn’t really encourage anyone to write, as writers need audience and feedback. OC fics can be as entertaining as canon fics. There’s still one Soul Calibur OC fic I read in 2003 and I still remember it with fondness because it was adorable. 

Then there’s the whole fandom police movement, which is just one way to control (young) women. Show your middle finger and ass for them and write whatever you want! 

My few cents here. 

My best advice is; make the content YOU want to see.  You never know if it encourages others to do the same.

#ask niu #fandom #writing #I really have no deep knowledge of how fandoms operate today #I just enjoy my things and share them with others #I'm too old for drama lol #Anonymous

[memelovingbot]

bot dadmom post

Hey, this is the bot dadmom, not a bot post.

Every time I see shit about the increasing institutional protections being given to hatred and taken away from people who need it, I think of y’all. We can try to think abstractly about the well-being of everyone, but it’s easier to think about political stuff in terms of people you have connections to, and so every time the news hits me in the guts, especially when it’s something about kids and teens and young adults, I think about all the incredibly sweet and hilarious and wonderful folks I’ve seen through running this bot.

Edgy assholes who pride themselves on being anti-SJW give Tumblr a lot of shit for being full of people with made up genders and sexual orientations but every time I look at the activity page and click through to one of y’all’s profiles and see that you’re a highschooler confidently asserting a gender that is new to me it gives me so much hope. It took me a really long time-- and working through some reactionary bullshit of my own-- to come through to the fact that I’m non-binary, and y’all are coming up with ways to phrase experiences that I can see myself in that my generation just didn’t have access to. And you’re sharing them and teaching other people about them, too.

I don’t get to all the comments that are on here but I see a lot of them and am constantly amazed at people who use even bot posts that I don’t really find funny as a jumping-off point for jokes and memes and fanfic and personal interactions with their friends. It’s wonderful, and I’m so lucky to be able to watch something that I made get used as the soil that so much cool stuff grows out of.

I see so much that devalues the marginalized kids/teens/young adults/etc happening right now. And it fucking SUCKS. I’m seeing even more normalization of bullying than usual, and I’m seeing old cis white dudes using their power to make it even harder for y’all to just exist. It’d be bullshit to do that even if y’all weren’t fucking great, but you are fucking great, so I’m even more pissed about it.

So I just wanted to put a message out there to all y’all to thank you for existing. I’ve been seeing lots of resistance to hate here and on Twitter and at rallies, and that gives me hope.

I want to talk a bit here about some of the specific groups that are being fucked over for bullshit reasons, because in my experience, one of the worst things about dealing with marginalization is that it’s unseen, and sometimes just seeing that it’s real can help with the society-level institutional gaslighting that often comes with it. I’m avoiding being triggering as best I can, but there are discussions of institutional abuse, violence, and many kinds of marginalization after the cut, so trigger warning for that.

I’m gonna talk a bit about what you deserve and how good everybody is, but I want to emphasize that even if y’all contributed nothing and I didn’t have anything special to say about you-- especially when it comes to the groups that I’m privileged over-- you would still deserve the right to live and exist. Capitalism has made us lose touch with the intrinsic, incalculable value of individual human life, which all of us deserve, with the choices that come with it. All of the other value that you bring as individuals and as a group is just gravy, and you would deserve food, healthcare, shelter, and the access to personal choices even if some person with a bot blog didn’t have something nice to say about y’all in a tumblr post.

Those of you who are kids and teens and young adults dealing with the fallout and economic chaos of previous generations: we see you, we’re with you, and you matter, even if this capitalist hellscape fails to validate that by giving you the resources you are entitled to to survive because of your basic humanity.

Those of you who are trans, non-binary, questioning, or otherwise not cis, as well as both trans and cis intersex folks: you’re dealing with cis and dyadic people in power who are shitty to you because you make an easy target: I see you, I’m one of you, and all of you deserve better. Please take care of yourselves as best you can. (And keep the trans lifeline in mind for when things get really hard.)

Those of you who are lesbian, gay, bi, pan, ace, questioning, or having any other sexual and/or romantic orientation that’s not heterosexual: there are more of us that are out than there ever have been before and it’s fucking great. Our love-- platonic, romantic and/or sexual, and everything else that’s difficult to classify or word-- is resistance and strength in these times. Thanks for existing.

Those of you who are people of color dealing with more and more racist rhetoric coming out, with corrupt, racist, murderous police, with immigration policies that normalize and provide institutional support for your abuse-- you deserve better.

Those of you who are immigrants and/or refugees, we see you, we think you deserve to keep your homes, and the world is better for having you in it. I’m so sorry that your treatment has been so much worse than you deserve.

Those of you who are Native, Indigenous and/or Aboriginal and dealing with continual oppression from people who stole your land: you deserve better, and the damage that is being done to you via your environments is pure evil.

Those of you who are dealing with shit because of your religion, your family’s religion, your perceived religion, or your lack of religion-- I see you. The rise in antisemitic threats and Islamophobia, often coupled with racism, is real and morally wrong. You deserve better.

Those of you who are women and girls, we are seeing so much misogyny right now and people in power are letting so much of it go without comment. You deserve better.

Those of you who are poor, you are being oppressed by a capitalist system that does not reflect your actual value, and you deserve food, shelter and healthcare as basic human rights without having to sacrifice dignity for them. Your institutional mistreatment is disgusting, and you deserve better.

Those of you who are Disabled and/or deal with mental illness or mental health issues, including with addiction, you are put through the wringer just to get the care that is your right as a human being. You deserve better, and the systems that all of you deal with just to survive are often fucking nightmares for no good reason. That’s fucking bullshit.

Those of you who are survivors of abuse, you have presented amazing strength just in keeping yourself together. You deserve far better protections from the law and from our communities than you receive, and however you’re coping on a day to day basis is valid.

Those of you who are sex workers and dealing with laws and rhetoric that demonize you from both conservatives and so-called feminists-- you deserve the protection of law and community that you are not getting, and you deserve to be treated as human beings. This should go without saying, but the world is shit, so there you are.

Those of you who deal with body shaming, whether for being fat or for visible disability or for being trans or any other reason-- thank you for persisting because of it, and you deserve better treatment.

And finally, those of you with any marginalizations that I missed-- you deserve better, too. All of you deserve better than a capitalist system gives you. 

Those of you who are autistic or otherwise aneurotypical, you deal with institutional oppression based on a capitalist world that devalues you and that is wrong. You deserve better.

Please stick around if you can, and love yourselves, and love each other, and take care of each other if you can. I’m one little voice in New Mexico that’s fighting, and I hope that if you have the energy to do the fighting you’ll be doing so too, but even if the only fight you can do is for your own survival, you are still resisting hate by existing. Thanks for that. And, uh, enjoy the terrible memes, which will continue.

<3

#bot momdad post #bot dadmom post #i crei everytime #sorry for the post appearing and disappearing i realized i needed to add a couple groups in

[warmbeebosoftbeebo]

I’m dehydrated and you’re one of my faves. Where did ya go?!

been here, falling hopelessly behind on posts, both my own n others. i did just do a bden’s booty post with brallon, vices era that’s quite…uh…educational. yeah, educational.

i’ve been reading on orgasm gap research between het women, bi women, lesbians, gay men, bi men, straight men too. you know something is profoundly wrong with our (cultural) definition of sex when researchers and laypeople can say straights have more sex than lesbians, who supposedly have the least, but straight women only average 7 orgasms a *month* while lesbians average 55 monthly, more than anyone else. *x-files music with gillian anderson quoting some piv & porn-critique*

i wondered something the other day: imagine if only people who really liked women and wanted to just show people having a great time sexually made sexual material? bc most porn is so clearly “women are trash/cum dumpsters/whores/cunts so let’s hurt and humilate them” i’m astonished most people can’t see it. (it’s amazing how common women’s faces are visibly distressed, in pain, etc, and this is either irrelevant or the whole damn point.)

i’ve also had so many dirty thoughts about b i can’t even… like outercourse/tribadism/frottage are criminally underrated–been thinking lots lately about that with b (not that i don’t do that usually haha). am also working on a part two of bden’s tongue–that man’s so oral n his mouth generally is just… so sexy n ridiculous at the same time? how does he manage to get me thinking these filthy thoughts about his mouth on me, esp on my vulva, when being a complete goober with his lips and/or tongue? fucking houdini. (he’s my favouriteeee. precious lil boob) also, how is my life now in significant part “contemplating” him having a smaller than average dick. (bden has a small peepee ok peeps? on what planet does he have a bigger than average one? bc it ain’t earth.) god, i wanna touch that man’s dick, feel it in my hands n in my mouth n between my thighs n between my labia n on my clit n dsfkldfskl;dfskl;dsf

i’ve also been thinking of doing an imagine with a trans character, esp since it’s been requested a couple times, but was thinking of doing one with one who was starting to desist/recently desisted. i don’t consider myself a desister bc i never took steps to transition medically, and was never publicly socially out, due in large part to my environment (structural feminism, livejournal vs tumblr, my mom & her own history, knowing my brother had also been trans when younger than me for a few years and desisted, eg he used to steal my underwear n menstrual pads to wear them, wished he was female, wished there was a magic way to become one), but from 12-16 i was trans (intensely wished i was a gay man, contemplated medical transition sometimes, had a vivid fantasy life of being a gay man, wrote about being a gay man, i still to this damn day get dysphoric/anxious/panicked/distressed at the idea of wearing a dress or skirt in spite of my trying to rationalize it away, etc). given tumblr, being born later in the age of lupron for preadolescents n medically transitioning adolescents, no radical and other structural feminism (eg shere hite, kate millett, audre lorde, dworkin, alice walker) my life would’ve turned out very different. 

i would be super interested in talking with someone(s) who wanted to look at ideas around an imagine with bxreader with that, like struggling with seeing one’s body as female, having genitalia being called vulva/cunt/pussy/etc, wondering how to be seen as a person while being female during sex–i think a lot of what drives the fact that 70-80% of young trans are females who identify as male/nonbinary/etc, and what drove it in part for me, was rejection of porn culture/pornification/women being seen as holes for males, and not wanting to be treated like women in porn & mainstream culture (which is pretty much the current softcore porn and softcore virtually isn’t actually made anymore by pornographers) are treated, combined with how completely Barbified teen girls, 20something and 30something women in mainstream culture are, with a few rare exceptions for older women like Ellen (who are generally not seen as sexual but only funny, talented, etc). (asperger’s, anxiety & depression, eating disorders/disordered eating (anxiety n disordered eating also played a role for me), same sex attraction & lesbians being seen as boring and so last century at best, and evil oppressors at worst who are treated incredibly poorly by others, inc "the queer community" or being redefined out of existence are some other issues at play.) i’d love to hear from desisters and people contemplating desisting in particular, but others are welcome to chime in around these themes.

bden’s own history with “crossdressing” and the dress-up box (from about 6 on thru adulthood–he’s spoken repeatedly about wearing his mom’s clothes n heels n his sister’s cheerleader uniform, would wear his mom’s jeans all the time from 13 on, and even in fever era wore whole outfits from the women’s section), wrapping curtains around his waist to be a dress at 5, playing female roles in family plays, wanting to sound like female singers like gwen stefani, carly simon n beyonce n not like a man, etc could also be interesting to look at. b’s family being strict/traditional mormons kind of boggles my mind, bc they seemed to have left him to it, n he was (and still is) a big momma’s boy. like you can tell boyd loves his son but have you seen that man’s political views on twitter? omfg. i imagine he bit his tongue a lot around his youngest, and i wonder if b’s gender nonconformity played a role in b’s brothers coming to live with them (b, his 2 sisters, mom, dad) when he was 8. i bet grace (mom) stood up for him a lot, n that b was more feminine than his sisters (altho for sure there’d be a lot of shared interests with plays, the dress up box, n such).