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#no shade to pigeons tho obviously
returntothesoup · 4 months
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deeply concerned as to the sheer volume of pigeon posts im being shown??? what did i do to draw this content??
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pagesofkenna · 1 year
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bananadumbledore: When @zzzendica and I saw they did a revival we jumped right on that lmao it's still so goofy but it still feels like the classic show. Also who are your top suspects 👀
i was SO excited for the revival, and then they just dropped like the entire season in 2 weeks which kinda bugs me lol, which is why i'm catching up late lmao
ok spoilers up until the last two episodes obviously
they're down to the final four and currently I think it's Kesi tho it could also be Will? I was certain it was either Kesi, Sandy, or Jacob until Sandy left and then I was certain it was Jacob and then they spent the whole episode before he left trying to increase our suspicion on him, so
The people who I thought were trying too hard to LOOK like the Mole are Joi, Greg, Avori, and I think Will? Except looking back, Will not so much, it was just him 'stealing' the cargo in the first episode that made me decide it couldn't be him—but now I'm realizing he's done a great job of evading suspicion since then, and that could have been a play to gain everyones trust?
I've actually been flip flopping a lot on Will but now I actively don't like him and really hope he at least doesn't win oops. He has too much alpha-dog energy, 'im always right and everyone is stupid for not listening to me', and every time he messes up he manages to shift the blame onto someone else. if he's not the Mole then he's at least kind of a pushy egotist
I knew it wasn't Greg and was kinda OK with him going home (he had too much cocky business major energy lmao). Jacob I was sure of because he seemed so genuine and kept screwing up, it had to be an act... and then it wasn't oops
Avori's whole 'im gonna intentionally look like the Mole here' thing seems too obvious and intentional for it to be her, but maybe that's what the editors want me to think? I won't be too shocked if it DOES turn out to be her, you'd think a pro-gamer would be better at puzzlesolving
If Joi turns out to either win or be the Mole I will be happy actually, she kind of went the opposite direction as Will where I didn't really like her at first, but in the last few episodes I realized she's doing that on purpose? and she's still in the game, which says to me she's either the Mole, or way smarter and more calculated about what she's doing than she wants anyone to think. she basically perfectly set herself up to be the least-liked person this whole season, and I'm pretty sure more than one person has gone home voting for her. and if she IS the Mole then she's done a great job of causing a lot of damage ($25k!?? really?!!) while throwing shade elsewhere
then Kesi... I think it's her mostly because I haven't had much reason to pay attention to her for most of the season. the only things I actually remember her doing are big 'oops I didnt notice' screwups in the last few episodes (not noticing the boat during that plane flyover when the editors were focusing on Avori not noticing the boat, not reading out the names in the gold lockboxes, all of the 'those pigeons arent flying in a circle, im confidant this is the pigeon we're looking for' stuff). i think she's done a good job staying out of everyones radars and now that its down to the wire she's really playing into the 'im stressed and tired and just missing things' thing. if it's not her... i'mma feel bad for this stressed out girl lol
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mc-kamuakaneshiro · 4 years
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Wet & Wild Headcanons
Note: this is based on Wet & Wild Hawaii on Oahu cuz idk what other W&W’s are like in other places. I'm This specific headcanon also suggests platonic relationships instead of romantic ones between MC and the seven brothers. It’s up to your imagination if you want to romanticize them in a specific way I just want to set a level playing field to work on.
Sorry that it’s super long, but if you get to the end comment below what you think or what you want to add to the lists! Thank you and have an awesome day! :D
[Belphegor]
Probably would just chill in the lazy river by himself or with Satan
Too lazy to go on rides with the others
No tan since the lazy river has lots of shady palm trees
Just look at the bb float all day
You and Beel will tell him to get off his ass and do some fun rides together
I mean it’s Wet&Wild dude
You gotta have a little bit of fun
After a lot of coaxing he goes to the Wave Pool with you guys and lounges there
That way he can hang out with you and Beel
Since the brothers had never been to W&W before he just thinks the Wave Pool is just a pretty community pool with a shore
That’s because he’s only seen it when the wave machine was off
Had to learn the hard way that it made waves
Almost got seasick and had to have you and Beel comfort him after the the waves were over
[Beelzebub]
Goes on all the rides with no fear at all
Really nonchalant about it too
Tries to bring Belphie with him to ride one of the big Kahunas
Belphie gives up walking half way up the hill
He’ll get a little sad but you can cheer him up by going with him on the ride
Is the fastest bean on all the rides
Accidentally had to kick the top of the Shaka to avoid flying off of the ride
He has the most gravitational energy of all the brothers
They don’t dare to go on the Tornado with him because he tends to capsize the raft
They learned their lesson the second time they did it
Maybe would be good at surfing
He works out a lot so I think he has some stable footing
I don’t know what will get bled dry first
Beel’s wallet or Wet&Wild’s food inventory
Probably the latter
[Asmodeus]
bold of you to assume he’ll go swimming
Boy did his hair to look nice not ruin it
But he will take NOICE af pics with MC
(Only if you stay dry tho)
(If you look like a wet dog he ain’t gonna have none of your shit)
Hits on all the Japanese tourists
And I mean ALL
Primarily at the bar
Partially to get drinks
But mostly to get girls
All the girls (and some guys) will want him
And (the rest of) the guys will most likely pick a fight with him
If the guys are local he’ll definitely get intimidated
Pigeon is much more intimidating than most English dialects (other than New Yorkian)
And locals can get pretty aggressive if you rub them the wrong way
Idk how he’ll worm his way out of it
Probably will go to Lucifer for help
[Satan]
HONEY IS TOO PREPARED FOR THIS
Literally has all the necessities and more
Totally smuggled in everything in a Mary poppin’s purse
Refuses to call it a purse
Big mom energy
Probably would just sit near the wave pool reading his book to catch some rays or sit on a floaty in the lazy river with Belphie if he needs some shade
Would definitely put a gallon ziplock bag over his book to keep it dry
Plan fails cuz Mammon‘s just accident prone
Would go on rides only on certain conditions
Either if MC asks
Or if the brothers say Lucifer would dominate him in a race
Then IT. IS. O N.
Will not back down from beating Lucifer on Island Racers or the Big Kahuna
Will recruit Beel to win at the Big Kahuna
After race he’s more likely to go on more rides with you and the others
he likes the adrenaline rush that comes with it
He’ll stop when it’s time for lunch so his mom switch can flip back on
[Leviathan]
Originally makes a nest with everydone’s bags and plays video games for like 2 hours
You and Satan get him to go on some rides by bringing some TSL based activities
You’ll most likely have to watch out for him if he goes into the wave pool tho
He might release another sea monster in there if anyone provokes him
Mammon I’m talkin to you Q^Q
If that happens then R U N
You’re in HIS territory NOW
Let Lucifer handle it if that happens
I think he’s actually really good at water sports it’s just that his weeb exterior fools everyone into thinking that he’s not
Obviously he summoned that seven headed sea monster that one time and now there’s no Monster Fair
I’m just saying don’t let him fool ya
[Mammon]
boy gonna be dragging you to ALL the rides no questions asked
All except the Tornado and the Shaka cuz he’s scared shitless just by looking at them
Even more so if Beel’s riding with him
If you’re scared of the rides he’ll be a total tsundere but try to encourage you to go with him so he doesn’t go alone
If you actually wanna go on the Tornado or the Shaka he’ll first refuse but then eventually he’ll go with you cuz again
Baby boi doesn’t wanna be alone
Screams like a BICT H on all the rides regardless of intensity level
No matter where he’s at he’s always gonna get in trouble somehow with someone
It’s up to you if you wanna bail him out of it or if you wanna have your own fun
His bargaining shenanigans alone are gonna take up all of your time so you gotta choose
Other than that you’re gonna have the time of your life with him
[Lucifer]
God damn it all he just needs a break
No matter where he is he has to fix his brothers’ problems
Please help him by preventing one (1) catastrophic disaster
ie. keep either Levi, Mammon, Asmo, or Beel calm so Luci doeesn’t have such a heavy load
He’ll very much appreciate it if you do that
Originally he’ll stay with Levi to watch the bag nest while everyone else goes off somewhere else
When Levi goes swimming with the others he’ll first purchase a few lockers to leave the bags in then he’ll tag along so he can keep an eye on the rest of the group
Finds it endearing to watch everyone flap like idiots in the water
Won’t swim because he refuses to wear anything that’ll even show his ankles
It’s Hawaii, dude. You should be sweating in those slacks
Chances of him swimming increase from 0 To 3 percent if you bought him swim pants, a long sleeve rash guard, tabbies, and hydroskin gloves prior to arriving at the park
That’s like a $200 outfit right there if your treating him yourself
Still most likely won’t swim
But... seeing you splash around having fun with everyone while he’s at the water’s edge makes him feel a little empty inside
He doesn’t say anything tho because there’s no way you nor his brothers will understand.
Right?
Eventually you tell him that Satan challenges him to a race
Being “prideymcprideface” he accepts the challenge and dares to get his hair wet
His brothers will say that the grin on Luci’s face going down that slide next to Satan was one of competition
But deep down Luci is just glad to spend quality time with you and his brothers
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thefudge · 5 years
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scattered thoughts on sanditon so far 
this is a fun romp from andrew davies and there’s a lot to like and be invested in
but i do have some observations/ gripes
obviously davies is going for a modern/sexed up adaptation of austen and i have mixed thoughts on that, cuz there’s a lot of interesting stuff you can do with that, but you can also botch it up big time (i’m glad he didn’t do this to p&p back in 1995...i wonder what that adaptation would’ve looked like today. probably full monty darcy, lol). so i think some elements verge on the ridiculous, for instance having almost every dude in this show strip naked in front of a crowded beach several times in a row. ditto for theo james. i don’t mind the view (hehe) but i think it’s inserted awkwardly at times. like okay, we get it, it’s a beach resort and we’re trying to make austen edgy in 2019.... just maybe indulge a little less and literally keep it in your pants. 
this being a more modern adaptation i don’t mind hair and make-up anachronisms, but i DO mind the fact that rose williams sports this really weird shade of fuchsia lipstick in almost every single scene. stop iiiit
speaking of which, rose williams is a cutie and i loved her on reign, but i don’t understand what she’s doing with her face in this series. don’t get me wrong, she does a good job of making charlotte very likable, but the only way she can express...anything, really, is by making these confused faces, like a child practicing frowning in the mirror. it’s...really awkward. and she does this all the time, whether she’s happy or sulky or nervous, she just always looks like she’s trying to figure out the fibonacci sequence.  i mean it’s hilarious when u have theo james going all gruff to her about his feelings and rose williams is that gif of the blond lady doing math in her head. her acting is pretty good otherwise, but those faceeeees.
esther denham is my goddamn FAVE, gosh i love a Disappointed Queen and i’m glad she’s getting away from that boring skeevy brother. for once the incestuous siblings didn’t do it for me at all (which is pretty much the point lol). there’s nary a dude more uninteresting than edward whatshisface, my gaaaawd (also, davies trying to ramp up the sexiness with those scenes of edward brushing her hair or doing her stays...lol, sir, this rly isn’t your strength i’m sorry)
but i have to say that i thought esther and clara would be a thing. because my gosh, the chemistry during their scenes! the way they’d glide past each other with utmost contempt, while being disquieted by each other @___@. i mean it’s an austen adaptation, so i guess they’d never go there but!!! i need fic (would’ve made clara more bearable at least. i appreciate her character objectively cuz she’s an interesting pseudo-antagonist and you don’t get many of those, but blerghh. she was insufferable)
i was kinda (actually very) disappointed that the relationship between sidney and his ward, georgiana, wasn’t really developed. like there’s one more episode to go (as far as i know?) and they’ve barely scratched the surface with them. i mean he’s halfway decent to her now.... but ehh. i feel like this was a missed opportunity. after all, this was austen’s unfinished novel, so andrew davies & co could have added more material between these two. this, to me, should have been the real heart of the series. 
i like otis as a character, but georgiana/otis was zzzzzz. i suppose that they’ll end up together? zzzzzzzzzz (i frankly ship her way more with arthur! she finds him infuriating! he’s a sweetheart! the shenanigans!)
that German doctor is the real MVP, i feel like he should be sanditon’s no. 1 bachelor. i mean the shower rod??? providing pleasure to all the ladies in town, what a hero 
the soundtrack is rly rad! and the cinematography
i love how the show captures austen’s growing interest in the industrialized modern world which was emerging in the twilight years of the regency and i feel like maybe the show should’ve invested more time in that modern aesthetic (steampunk!) rather the awkward sexual shenanigans 
so....i can’t delay the inevitable anymore, can i? sigghh okay here i go
sidney/charlotte...annoys me. 
HEAR ME OUT.
 u know that i love LOVE “enemies to lovers” and hate/love stories, i LIVE FOR THIS SHIT. 
and i was ready to gorge on this dynamic because it looked delish 
 but i felt like michael bluth finding the dead pigeon in the paper bag. 
from what i can gather, sidney is supposed to be a mixture of darcy and capt wentworth, “haughty” and proud, with a history of romantic disappointment, a brooding sexy hero with a heart of gold. but to me this dude just comes off as weird. 
there’s legit no reason for him to be THIS mean to this young girl he just met. he is not just an asshole, he is ridiculously over the top about it, to the point where he makes a fool of himself. i am FINE with a man telling a woman off, believe me, but it has to have some kind of motivation, some kind of reasoning behind it. here, it just feels like the plot needs him to be utterly shitty to charlotte so that “sparks will fly”. that first ep convo on the balcony??? wtf???? it was genuinely bizarre. i got weird incel vibes. and every time he lashes out at charlotte (at least in the first 4 episodes) it’s fucking silly, because it’s not like he lashes out because she’s scratching the surface of his innermost painful memories. no!!! many of their arguments revolve around basic things that he could easily clarify!!! which he does eventually, so like whyyyyyyyyyy. charlotte keeps telling him he’s being vague for no good reason and he still does it. it doesn’t make sense he’d be this guarded and outspoken at the same time. like, fine, keep that shit to yourself, don’t tell ppl, but don’t also get pissed at them when they don’t guess your mind. again, i love an antagonist dynamic when it’s done right, but here many times it’s just pointless bullying, it’s not sexy or fun or challenging. the writers keep making charlotte apologize to him about how “wrong” she got him and how he makes her doubt her judgement but it sounds fake to me. like a) this dude went out of his way to be a total assface to you from day one, b) none of that bullying was him trying to coax you into having a more complicated view of the world. when darcy rebukes elizabeth, he is hinting at her limited point of view. he’s not blatantly negging her or calling her stupid as this dude does. AND U KNO WHAT.
i’d be absolutely fine with him calling her stupid IF IT MADE SENSE WITHIN THE STORY 
like if charlotte had truly done smth stupid during the first episode, sure, fine, it’s somewhat warranted 
but for him to decide she’s an idiot for no other reason than her making some honestly super nice remarks about his brothers when he asked for her opinion is THE HEIGHT OF NONSENSE 
it’s even more nonsense when 2 episodes later he decides maybe she’s not that dumb after all FUCK U MR. EDGELORD
and it makes me pity charlotte cuz she’ll probably marry this dude and have to deal with him in his old age when he’ll be even more insufferable. 
and i totally get the appeal. i do! i mean their scenes are manufactured to make you want more of them, i see the chemistry, it’s there (and we’re already at a point in the series where he’s trying to make amends) but at the same time i’m put off by this dude’s intensity, cuz it’s not the hot kind of intensity...it’s more like he’s a giant dumb baby who breaks things. meh. theo james is very pretty tho, and he is doing the most with his character (that voice def helps!). but i wish this antagonistic relationship had been written better, because it could’ve been glorious
this is why i think sidney/georgiana should’ve been so much more present. just like darcy has his georgiana we need the humanizing element, we need to see more variety from this dude than just “guy who clearly needs anger management classes”. 
i’m pretty sure i’m in the minority or possibly one of two ppl not won over by this romance, and i can’t lie and say i don’t root for them. too much of this show is predicated on their clashes for them not to work it out and get together, but boyyyy do i wish they’d done it a bit better
i almost feel like a reylo anti lol, but at least kylo ren doesn’t neg rey every single time they talk 
also, i go back to rose williams’ faces because they just rly enhance how clumsy this dynamic is. theo james is doing byronic asshole 2.0 and charlotte looks at him like he’s developed a smell lmao. i mean the scene where she catches him naked? she turns around and FROWNS in this rly bizarre way, almost like she noticed a growth on his dick lmao it’s that bad 
anyway i totally get the appeal, but i also know what i want from this kind of dynamic and...this ain’t quite it 
honestly i think i prefer charlotte/cute architect guy whose name i don’t remember right now! 
that being said, my fave moments of this show are the most austen-esque, where ppl don’t take themselves so seriously. i mean the adventures of the perennially-ailing parker siblings (arthur & diana)? deeeelightful. the pineapple scene? glorious
also it makes me sad that sanditon was left unfinished because to see austen tackling georgiana’s character in depth would have been so, so interesting 
in conclusion, the show’s a lot of fun but also frustrating in many ways
i hope davies doesn’t set his eyes on re-adapting p&p or other austen classics because ermmm i know i’m trash but i am kind of tired of these sexed-up “look how scandalous we are behind closed doors” adaptations. you can make the regency era feel modern and relatable without “shocking hand job in the estate park” pls and thank u. sure, the regency era was the inheritor of the sexually relaxed 18th-century, but it wasn’t that relaxed yall. ppl still kept their wits and bonnets about them.
still, i’m glad this show exists and that it tries to take risks, i just wish it took different kinds of risks, if that makes sense. like i am SO bummed i didn’t get into sidney/charlotte, u have no idea 
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paradoxidolatry · 5 years
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Brotherly Love
@birdhole , @beatconductor a lil bit
TG: hey TG: sup
TT: Hey. TT: Not much.  Lunch break at work. TT: Sup?
TG: oh thats sweet TG: sucks theres no free pizza in it when you work as a cop huh TG: i guess its overall kind of a step up from the pizza gig tho
TT: Right? Free donuts though. TT: But nah, yeah, not so bad. TT: Didn't get a chance to tell you about it but I figure Dave or whoever's already spilled those beans. TT: Kinda weird, right?
TG: yeah dave told me TG: donuts just like a real cop huh TG: still cant quite wrap my head around this cop thing tbh TG: i can see you working as a LOT of things but a cop? thats wild
TT: Yeah. TT: I mean, I figured.  Got all that military experience, right? TT: But I didn't want to go back to the military. TT: Plus, working as a cop is an equal mix of 'keeps me active' and 'allows me to work around certain roadblocks in regards to the acquisitions business', so it was a good compromise. TT: Better than fast food and skin flicks again, at any rate.
TG: i mean i guess that makes logical sense n all TG: still fucking wild as shit to me TG: guess you can still wear a uniform even its obviously not as sweet as the fast food ones
TT: Yeah, I really miss that old greasy apron. TT: But what can you do?
TG: the grease just made your eyes pop in that special way ykno TG: chicks love it
TT: They fuckin do, don't they? TT: But somethin tells me you didn't message me to talk about the chicks missing my pizza funk.
TG: you sure about that? its a pretty great topic you could write a book on it become rich quick with your pick up tips
TT: Hey, I'm already on chapter 7: the Sausage Party. TT: But really though. TT: What's up, boss?
TG: nothing TG: i was just TG: thinking about you is all
> Heart, squeeze. TT: That right? TT: Cool, cool. TT: Was thinking about you earlier too, actually.
TG: oh? any reason or
[Dave txt @ bro] im watching u [Dave txt @ bro] > that chicken image
TT: Just, y'know. TT: Was outside on a smoke break and I saw a couple of pigeons hanging out, eating some sandwich or some shit on the sidewalk and like. TT: Got me thinking about you, and like. TT: I spent the past 13 years thing you're dead or some shit, and now you're alive and it's. TT: Just fuckin buck wild. TT: Pardon me for sound fucking sappy but it's kind of like a dream come true.
[TT > Dave: I'm behaving, dad.]
TG: ...am i a pigeon now? tho i do admit i would eat that floor sandwich(edited) TG: yeah its...its fucking wild huh? TG: kinda thought id never see you again even after TG:  i got away and shit TG: idk why not like you up and died but? after looking for you and you werent there i dunno i guess TG: i thought you just TG: werent going to come back TG: ...you didnt even see my wings yet you dont get to relate me to birds just yet dude
TT: I mean, I saw them in a picture. TT: One of you and Dave and a bunch of trolls and some old dude in front of a candy cane dildo? TT: But also you post about birds and shit all the time, so I figured that was sort of your Thing now. TT: And ... well.  I dunno. TT: Almost didn't. TT: I was just gonna stay on Earth, maybe pop in to visit every so often. TT: But then all that shit happened and Dave wasn't answering my messages, so I thought he was dead too, and...well. TT: I guess I'm, uh... grateful to the apocalypse for.  I guess bringing you back to me? TT: Well, no. TT: But like, at least letting me know you're alive.
TG: oh...yeah thats TG: thats my sisters actually and uh..shit what even is grig? grandpa i guess TG: already know mr d after all TG: i mean... im not sure how i feel yet TG: i guess im sorta glad because TG: i mean it has been my embarrassing dream to play family with you again for a while TG: i want to be a family again TG: a lot TG: its just TG: hard
TT: Sisters, huh?  Well damn, you got the whole family package with these folks, huh? TT: Nice.  How long you been with them? TT: Yeah, I figured. TT: I didn't, and don't, make it easy. I know. TT: A lot easier when you were a baby, even if our folks were shit, just cuz, y'know. TT: Everything hadn'tt happened yet. TT: Hadn't started to completely fuckin lose my mind and treat you like dogshit. TT: But I mean.  I dunno. TT: I'm not gonna force you or nothin. TT: But if you ever wanted to come backto the apartment and chill for a day, see how you feel about it? TT: That'd be uh. TT: That'd be really nice.
TG: 3 years TG: as long as ive been TG: away from scratch... TG: i..yeah i guess maybe TG: can you even handle seeing me get gay with dave tho
TT: God.  You were with Scratch that whole fuckin time? TT: Fuckin sonnuvabitch refused to tell me what he did with you. TT: Anyway. TT: Handling y'all and your homogay is a small price to pay at the end of the day. TT: Even if it's still. TT: Kinda really weird from my perspective. TT: But I respect y'all and he takes good care of you, so I can't complain too much, right?
TG: ...yeah like ten years TG: kinda fucked up huh TG: ill..ill think about it TG: okay so im gonna be real with you here for a sec okay TG: i TG: messaged you because i was talking to dave and i realized i missed you and TG: that i TG: kindawantahugiguess
TT: ...Yeah? TT: I can do a hug, yeah. TT: Where are you?  I can meet you, if you wanna.
TG: ...workin TG: at [coords] TG: dont arrest me mr officer these drugs are prescription
TT: I'll leave the cuffs in the car. TT: What happens off-duty stays off-duty, though, so. TT: See you in five.
TG: kay > Try not to freak out. Freak out anyways.
> Pull up by the curb a short walk away and park. > Look, you even pay for the parking meter and everything. > Step out of the car in your full uniform and approach Sock, one hand in  your pocket, the other raised in a wave hello.
> Oh god, he really fucking is a god damn cop. That's so damn weird. God. > Not as weird as randomly meeting up with him for a hug though. Damn it that was the dumbest idea. > You wave back, trying hard to look cool and not like you are dying on the inside and failing miserably.
> You stride up alongside him and... ...well, now what, actually. > Neither of you are very good at this kind of planning, are you. > Damnit, Striders. "Hey." > Now just to... > ... > Open your arms up? > Yeah.  That's how hugs happen.
> Oh god, he's going right for it.Oh god. Not even small talk or anything really bro? > Maybe that's better anyways because god know you don't know what to say. "Hey." > You take a deep breath and you...Go for the fucking hug. Squeeze that big bro tight.
> Aww shit here it comes and here he is.  All up and hugging you. > Actually, that's uh. > That's real nice. > You wrap your arms around him and pull him in for a good, tight hug. > It's probably not the most comfortable thing, what with your radio strapped onto your chest and name plates aand shit, but. > At least for you?  This is a fucking good hug. > (Don't you dare tear up in public.)
> You don't really care about the cofort level of this, it's something you've been craving for 13 years now, a little radio isn't going to stop you from enjoying it. > It's nice. It's familiar, like all the good parts of Bro you've been missing wrapped up for you in one big huggable form. Easy to forget all the shit for a moment. > But the moment does end and when you pull away you have to wipe at you eyes like an idiot. "Uh...Th-thanks."
> Aww, shit goddamn.  He's teaaring up too under those glasses. > You swipe one knuckle under your shades, and you take a steaadying breath. "Hey, yeah, no problem." > Breathe easy, Strider.  You glance up for a moment as you see a fatass snowflake come drifting down, then you look to Sock again. "Hey, you wanna maybe grab some lunch with me?  Haven't eaten yet and it's still my break, so."
> Well at least you are both sappy motherfuckers now. > Oh. You didn't expect that. You think about what Dave told you earlier "Stay in control" and promptly decide to fuck that advice because shit. You are already here. You already went for it like an idiot. "Yeah sure. Gonna have Donuts like a proper cop?" > You make such a face at the snow. Ugh, you didn't really prepare for that kinda weather, fuck.
> You snort a laugh and give your flat stomach a pat. "Gotta work on that signature cop gut, don't I? C'mon." > You gesture behind you with a jerk of your thumb. "Hop in up front.  You can pick the place."
"Hell yeah you do. You look like a fake ass striper cop dude." > You get into the car and immediately get the seatbelt. Doesn't feel safe otherwise. You don't really like cars still but you can't pin point why. It's just a weird personality quirk yeah? But you are used to being in one at this point of your life. > Just drive carefully. Please.
> You hop in and buckle up too, both pleased and a litttle saddened that you didn't even need to remind Sock to put on his seatbelt. > Poor kid. > Luckily, you are an impeccably safe driver, and the drive to Wherever is smooth and uneventful.
> Old habits die hard. > You feel kind of awkward in the car with him, it's too silent for our tastes. > You get out of the car at whatever this amazing food place he's taking you is. Fingers crossed for fast food- "Y'know kinda funny. Always figured my first frive in a cop car would be because I'm getting arrested."
> You snort a laugh.  It's Sock's old favorite pizza place. > God you hope he still likes this shit. > Also this wasn't a Pizza Pimp before, was it?  It was Gino's-- > Wait. > Ugh, well, maybe Dave's not at work. "If you're planning on getting arrested, you're doing this pushing thing wrong, kid."(edited)
> Oh the Pizza Pimp. Fucking score. Maybe Dave is there, that would be rad. "I didn't say I was, I said I didn't think I'd ride a cop car otherwise. Your hearing getting bad?" > You immediately freeze after saying that. Oh man, actually sassing Bro though? Please don't hit me.
> Dave is unfortunately not there, but he sure would love to.
> You catch that freeze, and you... > You snort a little, before pointing to your ears. "Too many concerts and phat-ass beats.  Knew I shouldn't have gotten all up and personal with those speakers.  Who knew the grown-ups were right about that?" > You smile, and it's a little awkward cuz you sure as hell have never been the smiling type, before you hold open the door for him. "C'mon, before we freeze our asses off."
> Oh. Okay. It's cool. It's chill. In a quite literal sense even so you get your silly ass inside. > A smile though? You haven't seen your brother smile in...far longer than you haven't seen him for sure. > That little scare knocked the speech right out of you though so you just awkwardly sit down at the next best table, suddenly really not sure how good of an idea this was.
> You take a seat opposite him, and when the server approaches, you order yourself a water instead of a soda. > Who are you, even. > You glance over the menu, humming softly.  Some of these item names... fitting for a place called Pizza Pimp. "You wanna split one, or do individuals, or?"
> Who is he indeed. You order a black coffee instead of apple juice though, so maybe the traditional Strider beverages are just staying outside today. "Uhhh..Not super hungry honestly I don't mind sharing one." > You haven't been able to eat a whole pizza at once in a while but you don't say that.
"Alright.  We'll split a medium and you can take the rest home if you want." > You let him pick the toppings too.  This really is a strange Strider day.
> The strangest. Do they have nuggets as topping because you want that.
> They might have like, baked chicken, which is kinda like nuggets and also? Is Carro-approved.
> Do you think the pizza pimp doesn't have a nugget topping what kinda fool do you take Dave for.
> A big one. >:3
> LISTEN Nuggets have been added like at least two months ago. Cock Special.
> Goddamnit, Dave.
> Sock loves Dave and the Cock Special Pizza. Prepare ya taste buds Bro.(edited)
"One Cock Special with extra cock please" > Yes, this is exactly how you order.
> Oh your face. > You're so fucking proud.  Dave sure is your little brother, and so too is Sock. > Bless these fucking kids.
"Hope you like it, it's my fav." > Both the pizza and you know.
> Yeah.  Yeah, you know. "Sure I will." > Snort a laugh. "This sure isn't Gino's anymore, huh.  You remember that place?"
"Oh yeah. Man..That's been a while. Clover gifted the place to Dave what? 2 years ago?" > Back when you were on a no homo basis. Memories.
> [Clover: nya face]
"Used to be your favorite, but maybe that's because it was free when I worked here. ...Clover?"
"I'm always a slut for free food but I still digged their shit later. Oh uh..Yeah. Little green guy? 4 of the Felt?" > Should..You now have mentioned that?
> [Dave] Oh no.
> There's this shift in your face.  It's not a frown, but a certain tightening of your lips as you're hit with the full brunt of what Sock just said. "...Dave's...doing business with the Felt?"
> WHOOPSIES >Oh. Oh, oh, oh shit. You fucked up. You didn't really think about that when you said it. At all. Shit. Fuck. Damn. "Hahaha whaaaat? Noooo. Of course not! He'd never uh...Clover is just y'know his uh... Sugar daddy yeah. Cash money man, can't say no to that even from a greenie right?" > Well it's not entirely a lie. You are sweating though.
> You paw at your face and you sit back in your seat, eyebrows knit together tightly. > Looks like you're going to have to have a little talk with Dave when you get home. "...No, guess not.  Desperate times and all that, right?"
"Yeah exactly! Haha..." > God this is uncomfortable. You are going to warn Dave but you already feel like shit. Fuck. "Don't...Don't hurt him okay?" > There's fear in your eyes now. Not for you but for your boyfriend, which is so much worse in your eyes.
> That snaps you Right out of your bad thought spiral and you quickly wave your hand. "Hey, no, no.  Not gonna hurt him.  It's chill." > There's that smile again, even if it's uneasy and a bit green around the gills.  Your brother and the Felt... "Really.  Just surprised he hadn't mentioned it before now."
> [Dave] GUESS WHY.
" 'kay..." > He probably hadn't mentioned it for a reason. You couldn't have known Dave wasn't supposed to do business with the Felt but you still feel like shit. It makes sense in hindsight and considering your history of course but...You just plain didn't know. > The Pizza arrives but you suddenly don't feel very hungry at all, sipping on you coffee awkwardly instead.
> You're, similarly, not hungry, but you've got to salvage this.  Not telling when or if Sock will agree to see you again after this. "Sorry, I just... Y'know, getting offered a gift by those guys.  If they had snatched Dave too..." > You shake your head, and sigh it off.  Out with the bad. "But they didn't, and that's that.  So." > You take up a slice of the pizza and you point is casually at Sock, an eyebrow quirked. "What're you out there peddling?"
> Oh. You'd really rather not follow that line of thought, yeah.  Smooth topic change. "Dude, don't think I should be discussing that with a cop in a pizzeria. Mr D would murder me man."
"Hey." > You make a show of taking off your badge and laying it upside down on the table. "Off-duty, not a cop.  So is it the good shit, or is it like, oregano in a dimebag being passed off as weed."
"We're still in public man." > And you don't want to piss off your Dad on top of the shit you just pulled.
"Yeah, yeah.  Weren't you in public anyway?" > You chuckle a little and you point toward the kitchen area. "Your big bro used to sell shitty dimebags out of there, way back.  Dealt to all the line cooks."
" Course you did." > You roll your eyes behind your shades. "What you want an inventory list? Okay I'll just tell you my favorite product aight? Kinder Überraschungseier......The surprise is Cocaine." > Huh, sure did slip into your mother tongue there. Welp..
> Okay.  You actually laugh then. "You're selling Kinder Überraschungseier full of Cocaine.  Shut the fuck up, seriously?" > You're nodding approvingly now. "That's a fucking great idea.  Where the fuck'd you get the chocolates, though? Make them yourself?"
> That makes you feel..really proud? Huh. You can't stop the big dorky grin from spreading on your face. "Best idea I ever had, honestly. I'm importing them from earth, duh. Along with a bunch of other banned sweets and shit. Who the fuck thought peeps are illegal anyways?"
> You balk at that and you laugh again. "Peeps are illegal here-- wait, shit, right." > Smack your forehead. "That's my job to know that now.  Wow, fuckin fire me now."
"Maybe I should show you my stock, just as a reminder. A fucking lot of dumb shit is. Fucking Lattes were banned man. Until the King unbanned them just for Jude which is honestly so fucking stupid. Way to play favorite, just like royalty should am I right? Not that I'm complaining, love me a big fat Latte." > Man it's...Nice to be able to make that kind of shit tier level german dick joke and to know you're gonna be understood just fine.
> You snort your water and you pull a face,but you're clearly goofing around a loving it. "Fucking nasty, dude.  I don't need to hear about your love of big hot fuckin Lattes."
"Aren't you glad the prospitian monarchy digs a steaming hot Latte too? What a life that would be otherwise." > You snort yourself.
"Jesus christ.  Fuckin whities, dude." > You stuff some pizza in your mouth and you talk withyour mouth full like the fat nasty trash you are. "Can you believe I have to work with them?  Like what the fuck."
"The Queen gives me the creeps with her I love everyone bull. And the King seems like a huge fucking idiot so...Congrats man. Jackpot."
"Not had the chance to meet either, but this is the closest I've gotten to infiltrating the corrupt government yet.  Maybe if I keep my shit up, I can finally overthrow them from the inside." > You are entirely dead seriouus.
"What's the masterplan? Shoot them in public?" > You aren't but you also don't mind the topic. Not a fan of these guys.
"Nah, nah, nothing like that.  Too messy.  Besides." > You gesture at the scar that runs oveer your eyes. "Never been a fan of guns."
"I know." > Hell maybe you should be grateful he ain't. Swords fucked you over bad enough. "Seems like a popular approach is all. Like historically or whatever. But I guess you gotta go for something less stale huh?"
"Of course.  Flashy's the only way to be when you're taking out a corrupt system of government."
"Looking forwards to the show Bro." > Except you hope he's fucking joking.
> You totally fucking aren't. > You toss him a wink, which of course he can't see all that well behind your shades. "Hope it's a good one.  You gonna eat any pizza, lil bro?"
"Oh, right." > You finally grab a piece too. "How's the Cock Special?"
> Stuff the rest of your piece into your mouth and brush the crumbs off of your fingers. "It's not big hot Latte, but it's nice and tasty all up in my mouth, so it'll do."
"I mean we can grab a Latte next time-" > Did you just say next time. Did you just imply you want to meet up like this again? Shit. > Stuff your mouth with Pizza real quick.
> Oh. > Oh... That makes yourr heart do the smiley emote. > You grin a liittle bit about that and you say, voice kinda soft, "Yeah... alright.  I'd like that."
"Me too...I think." > If you don't hurt my boyfriend tonight that is, is what you think.
> Don't you worry, Sock.  Not gonna hurt your boyfriend tonight. > You're not gonna be home, so Dave gets to go unhurt for another night.
> Or any other night Bro.(edited) > Or day, or ever:
> Well, at least you'll try to keep your cool when you talk to Dave about it later.
> That's a good start.
> Fuck yeah.  Before you all finish up here, you nod back to the streets now lightly coat with snow. "You going back to your corner, right?  You need a jacket?"
"I mean, I'll live..." > But it's pretty obvious that you don't have any especially warm clothes on you, you know like an idiot.
"Yeah, and you'll get sick, doofus." > You shrug off your jacket--it's a plain black windbreaker, while you wait for your city issue polcie jacket to come in--and you ball it up, handing it over to him. "Here."
> You open your mouth to respond but the Jacket is already in your hands. Oh. That's..Oh. > Is that what it's like to have a caring older brother? "Thanks..." > The Jacket is far too big for you and smells like Bro. It's a weird feeling to put it on. Like a hug you can wear. > Your heart is doing several emotions.
"Hey, no sweat. No good to go out there to work if you're just gonna freeze to death, yeah?" > You have the server bring you all a box for the leftovers, and you give those to him, too. > You stand from the stand and stretch. "Alright, my lunch is about over.  You ready to go?
"Uh, yeah." > You are still trying to sort your feelings over all of this. It's weird. It's nice. > It's what you wanted all along. > Except for the part where you are scared about Dave. > You get up too feeling like a huge fool.
> You, very very carefully, put your hand on his back and lead him out back into the cold. > Look to him, then to your car. "Back to tthe same corner? Or you got anywhere else you need to be?"
> You tense up just a little at the touch but let it happen anyways. "Y-yeah same place." > You just get into the car quickly to cut off the awkward moment. Not without putting on your seatbelt of course.
> Always seatbelt first, kid! > You buckle in and drive him back to the street corner you found him on, putting the car into park but not getting out. "Alright.  Don't get into any trouble, alright?  Oh, and patrol comes past here in about 30 minutes, so be cool when they pass, yeah?"
"Oh uh..Okay. See you, I guess." > You wave an awkward goodbye, overwhelmed by a lot of conflicting emotions.
> You're about to drive off, but then you open the door and, hanging halfway out, you call to him, "Hey! Love you, Sock."
> That just leaves you starring for a moment. Did he just-? Does he? What. Can not compute. "L-Love you too Bro..." > You are not sure if he heard that with the way you mumbled that. You are not sure if you want him to or not. > It's only getting weirder. > But it also warms your birdy little heart.
> You heard it--you've actually got pretty good hearing still, despite all tthatt music and shit. > You smile and wave again before ducking back into your car and driving off.
> The patrol driving by half an hour later doesn't find a drug dealer, just a crying kid in some back alley. > This absolutely kills the bird.
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stan-and-the-newbie · 6 years
Text
A kpop newbie’s reaction to LOONA
you know i had to do it to ‘em
Alexa: bold
Alex: italic
okay so today you're reacting to Loona!
o, noice
they just debuted like two days ago and everyone is crying
damn. ok but do any of them speak english <<
y es
n  u  t
i believe i already told you, they built this Loonaverse, and released a girl each month
yeh, you told me a few things
right. all of them have an animal and a color. the first five girls have an additional location, then the next three girls have a superpower, and the last four girls have a fruit
...alexa. t-twelve
yeah
<-<
>->
alright fam hit me up
okay, the first girl that was released, back in 2016, is heejin
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damn she looks like a disney princess
she does;;
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this is aN INSULT
isnT IT
someone arrest her, she's not allowed to be so cute. it is illegal.
how old is she and what does she do
uhh she's 21and she's a singer
she iS BORN IN 2000
... ALEXA WE'RE MOVING TO KOREA PACK YOUR SHIT
ill give you her music video now
alright
the location is hard to guess, so just try to guess her color and animal
hmm
*ViViD*
i'm not watching this u freak, you know about my arachnophobia
y tho. there are no spiders
THERE IS ONE IN THE THUMBNAIL, BIG AND RED
there are no spiders, so play the song, its good. no girl has the spider as her animal u coward
the song's aight. i'd listen to it in a cafe. her animal is obviously a bunny and her color is either red or white. asian girls with thick thighs are too powerful alexa. someone needs to do something about them. it's a health hazard.
omf. her color is actually hot pink;; but u got her animal right lol
o damn. well pink is the mix between red and white isn't it >>
ooOOO
pFFF
she's part of the first subunit, 1/3
ah, so she's a colonel
omG. i mean, y'know, subunits are some of the members that form like a band of their own and put out music
with 12 bloody members, i can imagine
loona has three. anyway, a few things about heejin
hit me
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she’s a whole cutie
o gee i couldn't notice
sdfdsdf she likes dad jokes and randomly breaks into silly and awkward dances but she doesn't care. she's also afraid of pigeons 
the guards would have to restrain me from pinching her cheeks if i was ever in the same room with her. and to be fair those things are chaotic evil. one literally flew into my face once.
omf
they also carry diseases similarly to rats. except they fly. so yeah, i can see why one would be afraid.
she also named a rabbit from the set "heekki". hee from her name, and kki from the korean word for rabbit, tokki. and proceeded to ask if she could adopt it.
that's adorable go away i am stone cold
is there anything else u want to know about her. her location is paris, and the first ever video of her beside her mv was her repeating random french phrases she knew in the airport
pfffF.
the next member is hyunjin
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they’re all so pretty i cry
they are :(
they are like porcelain dolls, but without the creepiness of a doll, just the beauty and cuteness
i KNOW. so, how old is she
hmm 20 and she's a rapper
she is ALSO born in 2000 ;D and she's a singer
i-
here's her music video
after mark's video on that cat game, the thumbnail horrifies me
o-oh
alight so her animal is a kitteh. so she's the neko of the group, noice... is this a thriller film, geez.
ghjkjhghjk its just a kitten smh
an e v i l kitten
cats cant be evil. her song is very kdrama-ish
her color is... i honestly have no idea
her color appears in the first third of the video
green? blue?
she wears it
lemon
yeh, yellow. and yes her animal is cat lol. what about the song? it’s a drastic change from the last one
ok that last part horrified me. idk it's a weird mix between depression and a drug trip
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so, about this baby. her location is tokyo, and she is the savage one
o-oh
shes the one that kept a blank face on a rollercoaster while the others were screaming. also, she really likes bread and croissants
and she's not a rapper smh. well, she does have a pretty voice.
she does~ and shes really sporty, practiced a lot of sports before becoming an idol
alright, off to my wife. this is haseul.
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and no photo makes her justice
i-
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UGH queen
that jawline fam
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i’m sorry i just. literally have never seen such a beautiful woman
alright by now i'm about 70% convinced that these people are created in underground governmental labs
m e. aight, how old is she
fucc it, she's uhh 18
she's actually born in 1997 dfgfdsdfgh
OF COURSE. sigh. that's just my luck
but i understand u
they all look between 15 and 20 anyway does it really matter- i- she's more pretty than she is cute. respecc.
this is her music video
her color is bleagh. i mean bleuugh. blue
omf
she's a parappa the rapper. but she's also a singer. idk her voice sounds like she can rap. was that plane just there and they used it or did they buy a gigantic plane prop for the video
(i really hoped alex would say this because this video exists)
i-
she’S TRYING. her color is green but her location is iceland so liek,,, i guess the writers clashed ideas
blasphemy. they should have went for turquoise
her animal is a dove. she’s also the leader of the group, and the mom friend #1. she can speak english but she has a cute accent which i Love
awh
aaaand she’s a seal enthusiast
o. that's something
they went to iceland so she was like "omg a seal!!! hi !! that was a seal!!"
pffa whole cutie
she is :( she’s also really funny
anyway, the next one makes me feel worthless. this is yeojin
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another flawless creation of the secret korean labs
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her age?
that tissue-printing chamber in that korean lab from avengers 2? not fiction - they use it to create idols. uhh 19
:D she is 15!!!1
...
and turns 16 in november !!
Goodbye. Tty later, i gotta pack my stuff
dfgfdGHJH here is her song. its very cute because, well, shes a child
L O L I C O N    A L E R T. those three dudes are terrifying. is that the joker wearing a frog head
mmmmaybeh
this is weird lmfao. aaand there's the foot fetish
you’RE HORRIBLE
why is the frog dude going all roaring reeo on her only to give her a fucking present
well, its a song about how she doesn’t want the relationship to move too fast, so she doesn’t want to kiss the dude just yet
that ending was just... idk man. this one broke me. her color is red, and her animal is a frog because that's the only animal in the foreground here idfk
her color is orange, close enough. the other members call her "bean" because shes the youngest and rlly smol and chubby.
awh ;;
and everyone treats her like a baby lmao
well, what did u expect. hmm i think i like the first one the best so far
o, alright
so, these past four girls and the fifth one form the subunit 1/3. the fifth one was introduced through the subunit's first song, but i'll give u their second song cuz its Better
*check out “Sonatine it’s superior*
basically, these girls have a very dreamy concept with a lot of piano and strings. the fifth girl is the pink haired one, and baby yeojin isn’t here cuz her grades were dropping lmao
i-
shhhh just listen to the song
this song gives me the sad
u gotta appreciate the animu songs
i do, i was literally gonna say that this one somewhat reminds me of miia's second song
same !!
her color is W H I T E like my teeth. p u r e  w h i t e
she haS HER OWN mv
o
the fifth member is vivi
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shes chinese and the oldest
from communism to idolization. noice
i-
so she's wot, 21? 22?
yeh, shes turning 22 this year
noice
here’s her song
a break from the animu songs. ps: they dont come back
sad. kinda stalkerish fam
ikr. shes a hooman here. but in the subunit mvs she’s an android
what
idk fam they go all out and no one knows whats happening
i am gonna get bashed for this but when she smiles her cheeks look kinda weird she kinda looks like a chipmunk? but not in a bad way
ghjkHJ she does;; shes cute though
yeah
her color is her haircolor lawl. pastel rose
o, nice
and her animal is deer
so she's basically bambi gotcha
she speaks english, and shes the reaction memes queen. and shes also very smol
awh ;;
alright, we're done with 1/3. is heejin still your favourite?
yepp
cuz we're entering girl crush land
o h
the sixth member is kim lip
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LISTEN YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO DO THIS
she’s cute tho
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of course she is. they're all cute perfect goddesses. i'm noticing a pATTERN HERE
hey, shes mostly a tsundere
well, ngl, she looks like one
sdfgfds
she chose charmander tho 10/10
here’s her amazing mv. her animal appears for 1 second here so lmao good luck. her color is very obvious
white, at long last
the other one
FUCK
SDFGFDSD
red?
yes
that building is aesthetic would hang out there with my weird friends 10/10. the song is odd, but it's nice
i think the song really suits her voice
it does! that's why it works
her animal is an owl
n o i c e
also in one of her vlogs all she does is talk about food. she also keeps the members company while theyre shooting their mvs!! and shes also a reaction meme queen. she sings, but her main strength is dancing
yeah, i can tell
oh right !! she is in the odd eye circle subunit, and these girls have super powers. imma tell you now, the odd eye circle members are in different planes. like, theyre in different dimensions, not the flying planes lol
umm alright..?
anyway, her super power is speed. aaaand i think thats it with kim lip
the next one is a fan favourite. jinsoul
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oof. idk man the blond is weird
oh, is it. i dunno, i feel like it suits her.
hammers in that "created in an underground lab to be flawless" vibe. idk, maybe a darker shade? like a golden blonde?
most people choose her song as their favourite
singing in the rain? is tom holland gonna come in and dance to "umbrella"?
oh my god
if not i'll be disappointed. the song reminds me of minecraft intros lmao. especially that synth part
geT OUT LMAO
the dancing is lewd af tho. so 8/10
well, so was eclipse. girl crush land
is she a necromancer? because those hips kill me and bring me back to life
i knOW. she can sing, rap and dance. triple threat. okay you cant possibly be wrong about her color and animal
uhh blue and fish. idk wot fish but a fish
y e s. its a blue betta fish. she said, and i quote "the blue betta fish is one that needs to be kept alone, because it eats the other fish in her tank. so i'm going to take over the group like that"
i- IS THE ENTIRE SECOND SUBUNIT SASSY
SDFGHGFDSSDFGH shes very oblivious and confused also idk if i should show you this but its hella funny and falls into the dumb blonde stereotype. she acts cute in a live stream and then she just
*that beautiful face plant video*
and at the enD KIM LIP IS LIKE "yes. whats next?" and looks through the comments
i-is she ok
yeah, she just stays there like ten seconds and then lifts her head while laughing. her superpower is teleportation btw. anyway, shes just very oblivious and awkward
nice man
the next member is choerry
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oof, she qt. her color is purple.
yes. she doesnt like cherries btw
of course. why doesn't she like them? they're gud ;; maybe they remind her of all the bad puns she must have had to endure
i- most likely tbh. she prefers her actual name too sdfgfdsasdf. but choerry is a play on her name. cho yerim.
ah, i see
here's her song that takes a very weird turn and supports further the girl crush concept lawl
i expect lewd dancing. wot’s her animal?
a bat
e d g y. they made her eat a cherry. the monsters
i know, the madmen
o, here comes the lewd dancing. oof, that was short, but it was cool. back to... this??
it happens more than once. hmm, its a really nice song tbh
yeah, it was pretty nice
shes the bright, positive one
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and managed to feed a squirrel out of her hand, so shes a princess confirmed
o damn how tall is she. she looks pretty tall in this pic
oh my god all of them are so small i literally cannot cope
;-; pure babies
hmm i think this is old information but the tallest is 165 sdfsGHJKJHJ
o damn
it says here shes 160. p u r e. her super power is plane travelling, like, shes the only one who can meet both kim lip and jinsoul. thats why i told you about the dimension thing
..alright..? this seems pretty redundant, idk. the whole superpower thing and the different planes thing is just odd. what purpose do they serve
well, its basically a whole universe, i guess it ties to the whole story
there's a story? uhh
yeah, but we won't get into that too much. here's odd eye circle's debut song
oh, this song is... something. i could live without the weird distorted voice. fucc yes more lewd dancing. well, that was trippy.
anyway, the third subunit is called yyxy, and it has "fall from eden" as their concept
o
the first member from this subunit is yves, pronounced as eve but it gotta be fancy y'know
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oo, noice. please for the love of god tell me her color is white
no one's color is white
well, it’s not a color ;D
ug h. anyway, here’s her song.
hecc yes more lewd dancing
omf
the song is.. odd. GET OUTTA HERE HER COLOR IS TOTALLY WHITE. EVERYTHING HERE I WHITE. SHE WEARS ALL WHITE.
:( her apple is burgundy
what. is that- is that her color
yeah
...i quit.
fgfdghjkghjGHJ
well, that was something
her name is eve, so people speculate the song and mv are about her living a normal life after falling from eden y'know. anyway, shes the mom friend #2
o, interesting pFF
she was very awkward at the beginning, when she first was introduced
awh ;;
and her animal is a swan
AND HER COLOR ISN'T WHITE GET OUTTA HERE
fgfdsdfg shes also pretty savage now that she isnt as shy, but she takes care of the members, since shes one of the older membersGHJKJHGHJK
wholesome
shes very cute i like her uwu
the next one is an actual animu waifu. her name is chuu
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i-
and she is the full of cuteness member
yeah i can teLL. the second image scraped my stone heart
yes, she softens everyone. here’s her mv, and the other girl is yves. and chuu is more or less in love with her. lesbian icon
alexa ur doing the thing, but reverse
SHES LITERALLY STALKING YVES AND GIVING HER AN APPLE AND THE SONG IS ABOUT ROMANTIC LOVE get outta here
ALL OF THESE BANDS ARE BASICALLY FAMILIES YALL SHIPPING THEM IS INCEST
ASDFGFDSDFGHJ but yves just shot a heart at her
it's a music video smh
hey, im not saying shes gay for yves in real life, just in, like, the universe theyre building
ah, i see. the choreography is gud. and the whole music video is nice. and the song is nice too. alright, what's her color
peach
do these people only know red and blue variations. THERE ARE OTHER COLORS OUT THERE
her animal is penguin, hence her posing with a penguin plushie in that photo
awh ;;
and her fruit is strawberry. she also sang a kids show ost before she became an idol :( and the other members make her act cute sometimes in front of the camera because everyone loves her. take dis
:'c
when she does the winking thing she stops and asks "why am i doing this..." and the others are just "because its cutE"
s-STONE COLD I AM S T O N E C O L D
anyway, yes, we all love chuu
we have two members left, keep your head in the game
i'm in it to win it
the second to last member is go won
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speaking of winning, apparently she already did
she is a real life doll- oh my god alex
yet another qt what is new. cute dolls. cute talented dolls e v e r y w h e r e
i remember her song just because of the way she sings "baby" there
o
*check out “One&Only” yall*
ah, i see. some nice cinematography here. she has an interesting voice
shes mostly a rapper
yeah, i can picture that. that was a pretty nice song
her color is eden green :3
n o i c e
her animal is butterfly and her fruit is pineapple
but does she like it on pizza tho >> that is the question
she's kinda cold, but shes pretty oblivious, the staff messed with her saying that "adam" is her stage name (adam translates to "small" in korean) and she actually believed them and she didnt get the joke either affdsdfg
;-; god bless
shes pretty savage tho, we have three so far
oof
she is olivia hye
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and she does not appreciate olive jokes
she's pretty 0^0
she is~
wot's her personality
shes very blunt and she seems like someone that might succeed at being a famous blogger
o damn
she always speaks her mind. i haven’t really seen her play around, but that doesn’t mean i don’t find her funny sdfgfsdfg
pff the mom friend
hmm, she doesnt really take care of the others, shes the second youngest
o rlly
but she does boast about how shes the only one without a fear of heights jasdfjks
pfff alright, hmu with her song
her song is my favourite
*”Egoist” ftw*
s m o o t h. yeah, this is a nice song
ikr !!
aaand more lewd dancing the world is kind to me today
they never give it up
wot's her color and animal
her color is gray, her animal is wolf and her fruit is plum
o damn
here’s their song~
this is hype af. this song is nice too but it has odd parts
i feel like the quality of their music increased with time. the first songs are also nice but you can tell these ones are better put together
well, it makes sense
it has been two years yes asdfdsdfg
o o f
here's a predebut song. the first ever with all of them, but not their debut the intro and the chorus are the best parts ngl
that's a lot of idols fam
eh, 12 isnt that rare. BRRRRRRRRRAH
where the esketit at. that was a pretty good predebut song, all things considered. they fit a bit of everything in there
yep, here’s their debut song
this one's trippy. ah, that's why it's called "hi high" they're saying hi to me, and i'm high after watching it. UOUOUOUAAAHH
I ONLY LISTEN TO MUSIC WITH MEANINGFUL LYRICS
HLBJLNKBJLNKBKLN
do you remember any of them as your favourite or did everything already vanish
i like chuu and the last one but i think the first is still my fave
oo alright, i see. any last thoughts?
well-managed for a 12 idol group, nice choreographies (& lots of lewd dancing >>), plenty of good songs, gud stuff overall, 10/10. 11/10 for the UOUOUOUOOAAAHHH
noicE
alexa here!! oof, this took so long to put together;; also if haseul sees this please marry me goddess ily
i hope you enjoy this post, even though its a little messy!! pop a little message in our ask box too, it’ll make our day~ i hope everyone has a nice day or evening!!
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gracefuldist · 7 years
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Okay, as Dist has a wide variety of canon looks, I wanted to ... a) whinge about this fact and b) set out my own headcanons as to what my dist-o looks like.  As you can see, he goes from having white to pink hair, tiny no-chin to yaoi-chin, stark black brows to brows that actually match his root colour, and worst of all - full on clown lips, only painting his bottom lip, no lip at all and then finally getting it together in the manga and painting both lips perfectly.  So... here’s an assortment of headcanons about what my poor wee goose-y son looks like: 
He shaves his brow and draws them on every day - this is why they are so inconsistently coloured and shaped. They naturally grow in his root colour. 
Which, incidentally, is white. While... white hair isn’t all that common, it’s certainly more common than lilac. Considering most of the TotA cast have the normal range of hair colours, I just prefer the white. Also it makes him seem more snowy/moony which reflects his wintery personality. 
Asides from his head, he’s completely hairless & even tho he forgets to do basic things like eat and engage in basic human socialisation - he will Always remember to shave. Lip/chin hair is particularly upsetting to him. 
Visually, he’s of east asian decent and has slightly brown skin. 
His hairstyle is less like his mop from the game and closer to his manga/anime style. It’s bouncy and flowy and obviously well kept. The hairdressers is one of his favourite places In The World. 
I’m going to give him the benefit of the doubt and assume he knows how to paint his lips. So.. no clown smiles for u dist, be thankful I am a Merciful and Kind mun. He will occasionally only paint his bottom lip, though, because he thinks it looks fashionable and cool. He thinks it could someday become a thing. He’s wrong. 
This absolutely isn’t canon but I like it anyway - when he was a kid, he had a lot of freckles. These freckles mysteriously vanished around the same time he discovered makeup. (They’re more vivid and numerous if he’s been out in the sun, aka he puts on a heavier layer of foundation) 
On his right temple, under his bangs, he has a faded scar from when Jade threw a snowball laced with a rock at his head. He didn’t go to Nebilim or any other healer, so The Scar Remained. 
His eyes are violet (can’t hc anything normal out of this one...) and veined with darker shades closer to red, which is more apparent in the sun. They resemble purple sapphires and are the source of his name.
At 5′9 and 62kg, he’s clearly underweight. When he’s busy working/obsessing over something, he typically forgets to eat - worse, he never exercises because of his Flying Chair. His legs are particularly muscle-less, and he has a very boney no-bum. 
However he does have a great waist. 
seriously, look:
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He’s got very wee hands relative to his size. He likes wearing gloves to make them seem a bit bigger. 
He NEVER buttons his shit right and always ends up unbuttoning it, anyway - sometimes out of subconscious anxiety, sometimes just because he hates his damn collar restraining his neck. His New Order of Lorelei outfit causes him quite a bit of bother because of that, but he Tries very hard not to undo that because Fashion. 
idk why this is important to me, but it is - he has a very wee, slightly pointed tongue. 
Also BIG FEET, he also walks slightly pigeon toed and runs with a very chicken like gait. This has somewhat improved over time, but not much. His knees are covered in scars from various trips and falls. 
He always tries to hold himself with an air of grace - this is all very forced and deliberate, making him appear quite stiff. However, he naturally sits with a slight hunch - largely from years of being bent over various work stations and desks. He will correct his posture when standing, but again, it takes conscious effort.
And that’s it... for now....  
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