#never spoke to him since

[bookwyrminspiration]

startin off 2023 with a family death let’s go

#tw death #haha no abuelo don’t die you’re so silly #anyway that’s another grandparents funeral I won’t be able to go to #since it’ll be in mexico #anyway since I can anticipate reactions: I’m alright and will be doing things as normal #I didn’t know him well. at all actually #met him when I was four apparently #never spoke to him since #he was. an absent parent to my dad. so #kidnapped him once <- not a joke #I would’ve liked to meet him though #any of my Mexican family really #I don’t like being cut off :( #I don’t like being so american when it buries everything else #I know there’s no way to get rid of it and it’s short sighted and privileged to try #but I cannot help wishing I was more Mexican #that I wasn’t stranded from that part of me #anyway

[rickybaby]

Nate on the ESPN Unlapped podcast: “He’s got that goal, he’s got that hunger back. He’s back in a team that ultimately he feels that is home for him. You know, we talk about Charles and how close he feels to Ferrari and Lewis with Mercedes. I think for Ricciardo, it’s the same with Red Bull. He feels that’s his home.”

#Nate talking about how he’s spent time with Daniel before vegas and how happy and ‘back to his old self’ Daniel is #just yeah …. ​it never gets boring to hear that #I know the moots are currently going off at Zak brown but honestly all I can do is laugh #Daniel never once spoke a bad word about him or his team last year and hasn’t even once taken his name since he’s left that team #and yet he feels the need to constantly put himself in the victim’s role because he fucking knows what he did #every time he goes on one of those podcasts and talk about uwu how hard it was for him #I’m like whine some more you fucking bitch #anyway Daniel’s home now 🫶🏽 #daniel ricciardo #Nate Saunders

[kitorin]

I WANNA GET HIS NUMBER

#sou's thoughts #hi here to give context down here #i've been going to this badminton club #and there's this super sweet guy who i admire sm #bc i don't speak chinese at all and people keep assuming i do but never remember that i don't #BUT HE REMEMBERED I DON'T and even goes as far as speaking english for me and translating #like this lady started speaking to me in chinese and i was so lost BUT HE WAS NEARBY AND TRANSLATED FOR ME #school starts soon so tomorrow's my last day #since wechat won't work (mf won't let me sign up) i'm gonna ask for his number #also i wanna try do more small talk !! #idek his age yet and what he does i just know how long he's played #but he's super fun to play with so i want to invite him if i ever book courts during the term #he's literally my role model #i wanna make someone feel that welcome bc before i spoke to him i felt so left out #and kept telling myself that i should just push through and make use of being able to play with new people #now i've been so excited to go and speak to new people #anyways long ass ramble but wish me luck !! #ngl last time i made friends outside of school i did it by trading parent numbers #SO LIIIIIKE #i'm nervous

[suddenrundown]

nothing else really matters to me except for this

by the way

#just so everyone knows where i stand: for morale won this episode #leverage #leverage redemption spoilers #l2 spoilers #leverage redemption #otp: for morale #alec hardison #eliot spencer #when parker and bre left the van i was literally sitting there like ''please please please..." #and then hardison spoke and i nearly cried #straight after hardison said that he was here if eliot needed him he was swiftly sucked into the vacuum of space #since we never saw him again lol but its cool i had this moment

[deviantartidentitydisorder]

i need to explore the idea of being haunted by the weird shit you did to eachother as a kid. i need to. its been crawling around in my head for way too long

#when did we break up (looks at the calander) YEESH IN FOUR YEARS ITLL BE TEN YEARS SINCE LAST TIME I SPOKE TO HIM GODDAMN #its been six years #i read a statistic that it takes half the time of a relationship to fully get over it #wrong. you never get over your first toxic yaoi

[shima-draws]

There’s nothing quite like getting a wedding invitation from the guy you used to have a crush on in high school

#Hmm. Feels awful!! #Me to me: Maybe. I'm not quite over this. #IDK IT FEELS WEIRD MAN. I'm very happy for him. But also kinda bummed at the same time. #I think I'm more just dreading showing up and being like aha yeah! Here I am! #I haven't changed at all since we last spoke! Not at all!! #Nothing new or exciting going on with me ever. No accomplishments. No partner I can brag about. NOTHIN #Hey anybody wanna show up as my fake date. Fake dating to lovers AU /j #Idk it just feels wrong to keep hearing from my friends in high school who are all getting married and having kids #Meanwhile me. Who has never dated anybody ever. And has nothing to show from the past five years: #SORRY I'M JUST HAVING A MID-LIFE CRISIS I GUESS. AT THE RIPE OLD AGE OF 26. #Me: I've been dealing with my anxiety and depression on the daily for years now and yeah that's it how are you #My friends: I got my dream job and I'm marrying the love of my life and I'm going to buy a house soon!! #I WANT TO CRAWL INTO A HOLE. AND DIE. YEAH. THAT SOUNDS GOOD #Sorry I need to sit here and feel pathetic and hate myself for a second. Then I'll get overe it #*over #Shima speaks #Maybe I can lie and say I've been backpacking through Europe for the last five months. LMAO

[bumblingbabooshka]

Watching episode one of Voyager is like watching the first act of a horror movie

#also I completely forgot that Tom Paris was part of the Maquis - and that he was only IN it for like a week before getting caught #Tom saw Janeway action figure posing the second she met him and was like 'fuck I'm not gonna let her be cooler than me' #(she is - effortlessly) #they want him so badly to be a playboy bad guy but he's just...HEHEHE he's SO whatever #Quark what do you MEAN 'cash or credit' ???? do humans HAVE /cash/??? HEHEHEH #Tom saw Harry Kim and IMMEDIATELY is down so bad v_v #It's fun seeing some members of the original crew ~ #'see you in a few weeks' OOF...........OOOOUUGHHHHH That hurts.......OOOUGH. #The Harry - Tom - Popular Guys subplot i s sooo highschool its crazy HEHEH #Tom thinks he's like the brooding bad boy but he's the nerdy girl who gets picked on until one day the popular guy says #'hey - leave Tom alone.' and smiles at him afterwards #'the ghost of those 3 dead officers came to me in the middle of the night and taught me the true meaning of christmas' #Harry (not well versed on by now ANCIENT childrens fables): ????what???? #Tom Paris: It's a long story Harry and I'm tired of telling it. #Also Tom Paris two seconds later: IT ALL STARTED FRESHMAN YEAR. #I also forgot the Maquis ship went missing first and Starfleet was searching for debris... #how long has T'Pel thought her husband might be straight up dead?? How long has he been undercover? How long since they spoke??? #(thinks about people whose loved ones died in episode one...thinks about them hearing that Voyager and some of its crew DID survive but #the person they loved did not - that there was never any chance of them returning) #Janeway's hair is so BRIGHT in this episode #'Harry - wait for me!' <- Tom in one line #I also love the creepy barn party 'don't look in there~! don't look in there~!' Voyager should have leaned way more into horror for REAL #Janeway's eyes widening when she sees Tuvok ~!! <3 she thought he could be dead!!! I wonder if she talked to T'Pel about it #Tuvok: (goes missing) Janeway: Don't worry T'Pel I'll bring him back to you if it's the last thing I d- (goes missing) #Caretaker after snatching up the Maquis: Starfleet has the chance to do something hilarious #Janeway (being stabbed): aa.. ..a!h...hh.. / Harry: (being stabbed) AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #Chakotay looking to Tuvok like 'do we trust her?' and Tuvok being like absoluuuuuteeeely <3 go for it <3 #Tuvok's voice is different~!!! It's quieter~!! Interesting~!! I love him <3 #TUVOK YOU DID /NOT/ GET /CHANGED/ BEFORE MEETING THEM ON THE ARRAY HEHEHHEE #'She wanted to know if she had time to send it...I had to tell her no.' AAAAAAAAA.....AAAA

[thestamp3d3]

i cant get over how absolutely insane satosugu is...gege was born to write yaoi forced to write shounen

#sorry i remembered hidden inventory arc n im insane about them again :(( SAD LITTLE GAY PEOPLE IN MY PHONE!!! #nah but it just...OUGHHH they make me so upset!!! #its just they way they start out immediately understanding each other bc gojo has been alone on a pedestal basically his entire life+ #but then he meets geto who treats him like a normal dude!!! not a weapon!!! and just watching them annoy each other as normal teens + #makes me emotional bc theres so much cruelty and just DEATH in their world but at the least they have each other to get through it!!! #theyre the strongest together after all right!!! then toji happens and gojo starts to perfect his abilities with him automating infinity #and then the gap between the two just gets wider and wider...until the final confrontation where the one who understood gojo all this time #not only leaves him but calls him arrogant at the same time showing gojo the ONLY person who he though understood just..doesnt+ #and hes left alone again in the same place he was years ago...AND OUGHHHHH #idk i watched a video analysis of hidden inventory where the guy said geto was just as egotistical as gojo except in having a savior comple #and tbh i never though of that before!! but looking back it makes sense with how he spoke to riko + the way he slaughtered the whole villag #to not just save the girls but also prove to himself that he could make the world he wanted #the guy in the video put it basically that since the gap between gojo and geto was so wide geto would rather be the best villain+ #than second best hero and that makes a lot of sense since his ideals/goals as a villain go against his usual rational behavior #he KNOWS its probably impossible (for him at least it wouldnt be for gojo which he admits) but he has to do it for himself #sorry im rambling but AHHHHHH how tf did gege write this??? its such a small part of the story but its arguably the catalyst for everything #aside from plot wise it simply just is impactful emotionally! gege had to go thru a toxic codependent homoerotic friendship to write this+ #theres just no other way #jjk #jujustu kaisen #gojo satoru #geto suguru #satosugu

[biillys]

a c in english and a c- in spanish. yeah. well, that's not normal for you. if you say so.

STRANGER THINGS — 4.01: the hellfire club

#m #gifs #long post #this post is literally too long but u know what. don't care. didn't ask. #anyway. in the hot version of st that lives in my mind where billy survives #we get like. a parallel type of cut scene here. with max in her school mandated counseling session #then billy in his hospital mandated therapy session #and it cuts between them both #max fidgeting with her headphones. billy tearing what's left of his nails apart. #both being unable to sit still. #them both being stubburn and holding every single fucking emotion so deep inside that they know it'll never see the light of day #both their answers mirroring each other even when they're like. fucking miles apart and have barely spoke since everything happened #like they've seen each other. max basically lives at the hospital. but billy's throats fucked. and max isn't really the chatty type #and they honestly don't even know what to say to each other #so max just sits. reads comics. listens to music. and billy just lies there. prays for death. prays to visit the fucking ocean again. #and they don't talk. but they're there for each other and they Get It in the only way they know how #OR. the au where neil was possessed and both him and susan die #billy and max having to go to see the councelor. fuckin family counseling sessions. or seperate i guess #is billy still in school? i dont actually understand american ages and schooling it has to be said #but like. councelor kelley just being like. wow. they sure are siblings. #okay but if he's not in school then like. court mandated therapy sessions for legal guadian custody of max idk #i just think i would like to see the parallels that couldve been. but like. #sadie sink i owe you my life for making season four have some good scenes and i would die for u #maxmayfieldedit #max mayfield #anyway again this is not the scene i set out to gif. just made like 30 gifs of a scene i didnt even intend on giffing. fuck me

[ardenssolis]

[Neuvillette is so :blush:]

#I don't play g.e impact anymore since it was just too MUCH getting into it #again / I missed like 5345435 lore things due to events never being redone #but I have been keeping track and I loved Neu the moment he spoke #I'd download it JUST to get him and then undownload lmfao kfjdskfhskf #;ooc jabber #;tbd

[magentagalaxies]

i really want to start making a table collecting statistics on the audience demographics i'll perform my aubrey material for (like what generation most of the audience is, whether i'm performing in a predominantly queer space, etc.) and how well the jokes land bc like. i need to collect more data points before i can properly present my findings but the results so far have been fascinating

#again i do not have enough performance experiences to make any definitive claims about who ''aubery's audience'' is #but i find it funny that any time i show my aubrey material one-on-one to a queer gen z person #they're always like ''i love it but straight people will definitely hate it or not get it'' #and i get the inclination to be like. ''i like this thing so people like me will like this thing'' #and cishet society seems so polarized w/r/t queer topics it's like. the assumption makes sense #however. whenever i've done an aubrey performance in front of an audience that's predominantly queer and gen z #i've actually received a primarily negative response!! and somehow straight people have never given me shit for my aubrey material #(''well straight allys don't count'' i told some of my aubrey jokes to a joe rogan dudebro and he enjoyed them) #(which yeah maybe could be a mark against my comedy but i like to think i opened his mind a bit at the very least) #i really want to test my aubrey monologues in front of a primarily gen x/boomer audience #bc so far i only have actual performance experience in front of gen z or millennials #and the older people i've told jokes to individually or shown videos of my stuff have really liked it #luckily paul has said a goal for when i'm in town this summer is to get me to perform my aubrey stuff in as many different places as possib #for both queer audiences and non-queer audiences so i can gauge reactions since i don't want to be confined to one demographic #so i'll get a lot of data points this summer #@ paul get me a performing slot at senior citizen pride lmao these are my people #(shoutout to paul going ''jess stop collecting the old homos!'' last time i was in town) #(and when i imitated him and was like ''old gay men are not your pokemon!'' bellini was like ''ok but they may be your audience'') #also one data point i really want to see the variation on is how my one specific joke plays in these different demographics #bc i have a joke that like. it's literally not even about AIDS and doesn't punch down at all #i literally say ''if you're gay and over the age of 50 you could violate the geneva convention and i'd still be like support our troops'' #like obviously being like ''you have been through hell so i will let you get away with literal war crimes you deserve ultimate immunity'' #BUT. in the line right before the quote i use the phrase ''AIDS generation'' not as a derogatory term but being like. #this horrible thing impacted the entire generation y'know? and bellini and scott and their friends call themselves that it's just the term #but when i said the phrase ''AIDS generation'' in front of my gen z audience i heard gasps and felt like they all hated me #and when i did the same line in front of millennials it wasn't quite as striking but their eyes did widen #like i was suddenly an ''edgy comedian''. but like this is a part of our history and it does inform the story i'm telling #the story i'm telling is comedic but it's grounded in this real world context #and i'm like. @ the audience who was offended: when was the last time any of y'all spoke to a gay man over the age of 50 #bc bellini loves that section of the monologue and was offended that people would even take offense to that phrase

[grabyourpillow]

No thoughts just the way Morpheus's teeth –hidden behind his lips– snare, the way his jaw locks in an iron clench, the way his voice vibrates in barely-contained fury when he utters an almost perfectly calm

"He must, be punished."

#i saw that interview with Tom Sturrige when he mentions that #Neil Gaiman told him that when Dream spoke #he knew precisely what he wanted fo say #never a meaningless word #and I haven't been the same ever since #the sandman #dream #dream of the endless #calliope the sandman #tom sturrridge #the sandman netflix

[thesingingrevolution]

reading my diary entry from 8th grade when the boy i liked so much gave me a kiss on the cheek..

#i went crazy #i was like. 100% sure he was the love of my life #in the entry im like #i was out cold on the floor #and i literally said if we ever actually kissed i would have ended up in the hospital #i know that absolutely yes that would have happened #i would actually have passed out at the very leasr #least #i liked him so so so so so so so so so much #i was literally like #it’s not 20:49pm and i can still feel it on my cheek 5 hours later #IT IS**** 20:49 NOOO #crazy #it wasn’t a romantic kiss btw. we were saying goodbye #for a long school break #i never got to properly say goodbye to him. he never really spoke to me after he broke my heart #and after i wrote a letter to him telling him i appreciated our friendship and i wished him luck back home he embarrassed me #i still remember the pain it was so bad #we have spoken since though. and even seen each other in person 5 years later. but it’s ancient history now #i dont think he knew the real depth of my feelings #anyway about the kiss moment #but it caught me off guard and i literally explained the whole cultural aspect of hugs and kisses it was shsgsgsgahahaj #oh well #such a messy end to a nice friendship #i will never forget how much i cared for you ******* #this is so sick #i cant stop crying #sorrt its so incoherent

[daydreamerdrew]

Tales of Suspense (1959) #86

#Steve is so freaking dramatic #Sharon has yet to be given a name #apparently she and Steve are on close enough terms that he was expecting a date #last we saw her in the previous issue she was kidnapped to lure him somewhere #and at the end when she’s rescued she’s internally grateful for the whole situation because it brought them together again #and that’s it that’s the end of the story #apparently they got to know each other for the first time ever off-panel #because the previous time she was in the book he passed her on the street and immediately became emotionally invested #because she looked exactly like Peggy #then he helped her when her S.H.I.E.L.D. mission went awry #and then never spoke to her again because he was told she was dying from exposure to the bomb the mission was about #he hasn’t even learned that she’s actually related to Peggy #he’s presumably since learned her name and just hasn’t said it out loud yet but he definitely didn’t learn it during that first storyline #he did that dramatic mourning of his second chance with Peggy reborn without even learning the real name of the woman he was projecting on #but anyway oh noo a woman with a job is busy with her job he’s ‘lost her again- forever’ #marvel #steve rogers #sharon carter #my posts #comic panels

[atomicengineerdetective]

No one talk to me I just came back from a family vacation to find out my favorite youtuber ever is leaving the platform.

I am devastated.

(I am actually happy for him, he has given me so much happiness for like 8 years. He deserves to let the channel go an enjoy his life. It just hurts, but I'll get over it

I'm so thankful for MatPat and Steph. I Hope every future endeavour or project they take on is successful and that over all they have a happy and fulfilling life with Ollie.💚❤️💛💙)

#I leave to a place with no cellphone signal and come back to this? #may be the lord was protecting me idk #What do I call this? a personal rant? Im not really ranting more like letting my feelings out #venting if you #never done this on my blog before but I feel like I have to #I've been a Fan of game theory since I was like 13 or 14 #He was like the first youtuber I ever suscribed to #that spoke english cause my first language is spanish lol #His videos and overall community meant a lot to me. I dont know how could I possibly express that #Of course Im going to still watch the videos after he is gone with the new hosts but still it wont be the same #Hope this doesnt sound too like sad. I dont mean to be negative. I am legitemetly so proud and happy for him #I mean He had one of the classiest goodbyes of YouTube at least I can say my favorite youtuber was never cancelled thats a win haha #But seriously he has achieved so much and has over all been such a positive influencer how could I not be proud to call myself a Fan #so truly I am not sad He ended on the highest note you could ask for. I cannot ask for anything more from him. #I am not sad However I did cry like a Baby during the Video. Man I just. Im tearing up even thinking about it #but anyway #You bet I am going to watch every single one of his videos the second they upload until march 9. #And then I am going to dedicate the day to the celebration he supposedly plans for then #I will probably vent some more in a bigger post then too. like I did in this tags lol. #Right now... I just cant. I need to process a little more heh #MatPat #Matthew Patrick #The game Theorists #game theory #goodbye matpat

[brekkie-e]

I spent 2 hours with a friend yesterday and she opened my eyes to the potential of Gortash oc's.

Im running with the idea but in the blandest possible way and idec. But like. Pretty girl he sees when he's like 7 at his parents cobbler shop getting shoes. Oh no she's a noble. He's haunted by his crush for the next 20 years. Excited to show off his new Archduke status to her. She's routinely unimpressed by him.

She's probably annoyingly nice and like funds charities and shit. Going in to politics to help people. He hates her. She knows more legal stuff than him and makes him look dumb. He's an artificer genius, and it makes her look dumb. She'll never be able to accept his moral bankruptness, and he'll always be devestated about it.

#brekkie personal #rambles rambles rambles #she's gonna be so cute and have precious curls #idk maybe she is on track to becoming a duke and he swoops in out of nowhere and shes like who is this punk #and hes like what do you mean you dont remember me ive been in love with you since i was 7 #no we never spoke #no you never learned my name #but i plotted my 30 step plan to marrying you by the time i was 12 #i was in hell at the time btw #it kept me going #and shes just like slow blinking at him #like ok weirdo #and goes back to her law text books cause she actually is taking being part of the legal system seriously