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csuitebitches · 6 months

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Fearless Social Confidence: Strategies to Live Without Fear, Speak Without Insecurity, Beat Social Anxiety, and Stop Caring What Others Think - Patrick King book notes

Socially confident people:

expect to be accepted. When they meet strangers, they expect to make a good impression. They never approach situations thinking, “What if they don’t like me?” Instead they think, “I hope I like them.”

evaluate themselves positively. Socially confident people are encouraging, positive, and accepting of themselves. They give themselves leeway not to be perfect and don’t beat themselves up too harshly when they are not.

feel comfortable around superiors. Socially confident people feel comfortable because they don’t feel threatened, or that their flaws and vulnerabilities will be highlighted by the other person’s qualities.

With a lack of social confidence, you are usually choosing the thought that is cruelest to yourself.

when navy SEALs recognize that they are feeling overwhelmed, they regain control by focusing on their breath—breathing in for four seconds, holding for four seconds, and then out for four seconds, and repeating until you can feel your heart rate slow down and normalize.

Core beliefs:

Steps in a thought diary entry can be arranged in the easy-to-remember A-C-B format—

Activating Event. Note down the event/ situation. This is simply the origin point of your emotional change. It’s whatever caused your emotional status to change from calm to agitation (a memory, a song, etc).

Consequences. In this step you identify the specific emotions and sensations that arose. These could be simple feeling words— “anxious,” “unhappy,” “sickened,” “panicky,” “melancholy,” “confused,” and so forth.

Beliefs. This is where the action begins. How do you link the activating event with the consequences? What unconscious narrative or story about yourself was told to achieve the consequence? (“What was I thinking?” “What was going through my head when this happened?” “What’s wrong with that?”“What does this all mean?” “What does it reveal about me?”)

Now you’ve gotten to the bottom of your situation and figured out what your core beliefs are.

The first step is writing down one of the core beliefs you’ve just uncovered. Ask yourself what experiences you’ve had that prove your core belief wasn’t always true. Generate as many experiences as you can and be very specific about what happened.

Write down the core belief you’re examining. Think of ways that you can put that belief to the test. These are actual tasks that you can perform. Then, write down what you expect or predict will happen after conducting these tasks if your core belief was true. Perform the tasks. Write down what really happened after you completed your task. Compare and contrast your predictions with what actually happened. Finally, document what you learned from the task and come up with a new, more reasonable core belief that goes in line with your discoveries.

Bushman’s results imply that sometimes the best course of action after being provoked to anger is to just sit quietly and let it pass.

There’s a direct link between social anxiety and negativity. A 2016 Australian research study showed that “elevated social anxiety vulnerability is characterized only by facilitated attentional engagement with socially negative information.” Obsessing over negative details—including by constantly talking about one’s problems—only reinforces one’s social fears and does nothing to inspire real confidence in a social setting.

Personalization is the mother of guilt. In the cognitive distortion of personalizing, you feel responsible for events that cannot conceivably be your fault. While it is admirable to take responsibility for your actions, there are things completely out of your control: the subway schedule, other people’s actions, and a million day-to-day factors.

Common cues of overgeneralization are “always” and “never.” When starting a sentence or a thought with “always” or “never,” consider whether you have the experience or evidence to back up the statement.

Other people aren't only what they are showing to the world. Most people put on a good show. But do you really know what might be going on in their private life? Take comfort from the fact that while there will be many people who are better at certain things than you are, there are also most certainly things that you will be better at.

If you are self-conscious and worried that people will judge you if you say something stupid or “off,” there's an easy workaround to that. The best approach is simple preparation. Create answers to predictable questions and conversations. Run that mental videotape in your mind about your past 10, 20, or 30 social conversations. I guarantee they are not all that different from each other.

Figure out the general questions that people will ask and the topics that will come up in normal conversation and be prepared with story-answers. For example, How was your weekend? What are you doing this weekend? How was your day? What do you do for work?

How can we ease ourselves into social confidence little by little?

List the social situations you avoid. Ask yourself what kinds of gatherings or circumstances you steer clear of and write them all down in a list. Your list should include both physical situations—parties, family gatherings, work presentations, and so forth—and personal experiences that you don’t want to face.

Give each situation a SUDS level from 0 to 100.

Plan your goals.

Build your goal stepladder. You’ve planned a goal and have decided to start work. Remember, situational exposure is a bit-by-bit process.

#powerful woman #c suite #ceo aesthetic #personal growth #strong women #productivity #that girl #getting your life together #balance #Book #social #social anxiety #confidence #speaking

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thefoxholecast · 2 months

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The Original Foxhole Court Extra Content (Archived from Nora Sakavic’s Tumblr)

We copied the following text directly from the pre-2024 version of the Foxhole Court Extra Content page on Nora Sakavic’s Tumblr blog (korakos.tumblr.com/fox). In March 2024, she did “some spring cleaning” by shortening the list of links and deleting/hiding old posts. The links in this copy lead to archived snapshots of the old posts on the Internet Archive Wayback Machine.

Some of the links are broken. If you have copies of these posts, please let us know so we can fill in missing content!

Because Tumblr only allows up to 100 links per post, we're unable to replicate the full list here. View the full list of links on our blog here: thefoxholecast.tumblr.com/FoxArchive

The Foxhole Court

ETA 2023: most of the posts here are from 2013-2015. Some of them overlap with older drafts. Some answers have evolved over time, even if they haven’t been updated here. Most I haven’t changed my mind on, for better or worse. Take ‘em or leave ‘em, and good luck making sense of ‘em around all the drunk rambling and detours. One day if I have the energy I’ll just sort it into a coherent reference.

Two sections here: the questions submitted by tumblr users, and a miscellaneous collection of stories & factoids pulled from the oft-neglected blog. The questions aren’t in any particular order, though I did try to organize them by subject matter. Ish. Once the dust is settled a bit I’ll try to find a better sorting system. Also, the tumblr tag I use for questions is http://korakos.tumblr.com/tagged/foxhole-court-questions-and-spoilers

Lots of spoilers for The Foxhole Court ahead!

Preface: Why are Asks disabled in 2016?

COURTING MADNESS

—Exy Rules & Regulations

—Exy: A History of the Sport

—Palmetto State University

—The original “What Happens After King’s Men” post

—SON NEFES, the cousins’ freshman year through Renee’s eyes

——One . Two . Three . Four . Five

—Nicky Hemmick

—Seth Gordon

—Aaron Minyard

—Matt Boyd

—Kevin & Andrew

—David Wymack & the Monsters

—Wymack & Andrew re: Neil

—Dan Wilds is recruited to the Foxes *

—Allison through Dan & Renee’s eyes *

——pulled from an abandoned, unfinished book about the Foxes’ women

TUMBLR

NEIL

—Neil’s life on the run

—Do they ever celebrate Neil’s birthday?

—What if Neil told the truth earlier?

—Neil through the Foxes’ eyes

—Neil through Ichirou’s eyes

—Neil’s looks post-book and relationship with his reflection

—Does Neil ever talk to Bee?

—Neil’s millions

—Neil’s fight training

—Who’s Neil closest to beside Andrew

—Neil’s fashion style

—Cellphone ringtone

—Christmas/birthday presents for Foxes

—Does Neil ever cry?

—Neil’s lonely fifth year

—When Neil’s overwhelmed

—Does Neil crush on his teammates?

—Neil & Ichirou’s intimidation

ANDREW

—Andrew’s sober look at his teammates & Neil

—How did Andrew react to Cass’s letter?

—Andrew’s medication and the follow-up

—Has Abby seen Andrew’s scars?

—Andrew & Mama Bee

—Andrew & Roland

—How far has Andrew willingly gone?

—What animal figurine did Andrew buy Betsy?

—Andrew’s eye color

—Andrew’s opinion of the cats

—What’d Andrew say to Nicky in TKM?

—Andrew’s honest opinion of Exy

—Andrew’s thoughts on Neil’s binder

—Andrew and his sexuality

—If Andrew had met Neil’s mother

—Andrew’s thoughts on Neil’s sexuality

—Andrew’s fondest memory of Neil

—Andrew’s aforementioned withdrawal

—Do you think Andrew is really really really awesome?

—Proust and Andrew

—What happens to Proust?

—Andrew’s reaction to Neil’s bday blood

—Andrew on Neil eventually changing out

—Does Andrew get grumpy?

—Does Andrew get less dead inside?

—Does Andrew call Neil by his name?

—Why give the Foxes crackers?

—Andrew’s first choices in winning a fight

—Who liked knives?

—What got chopped from Drake’s arc?

—Does Andrew get off thinking about Neil?

—Post Andrew & Bee’s side story?

—When did Andrew start thinking Neil was interesting?

—Any other words he can’t stand?

—What does he think about nicknames?

—Explain Andrew’s fatal disease in the comic version

—Andrew’s canon mental state

—How did Andrew not know about Tilda’s abuse?

—Why punch Neil for “Sorry”, and when Andrew is sick

—What’s with Andrew and promises

—Andrew’s thoughts on Roland’s premature confession

—Andrew’s arrest

—Wanting nothing vs not wanting anything

—Why was Andrew laughing after Drake?

—If Neil had chosen Dan & Matt over Andrew

NEIL & ANDREW

—The other 10%

—Which teammate caught on first?

—Do Andrew & Neil go on dates?

—When did they first hold hands?

—When did Andrew clue in?

—Exites self-censure

—Betsy’s & Aaron’s reactions to the news

—Roland’s opinion of things

—The breaking point

—Who tops?

—On tying people up

—Their domestic life aka Sir Fat Cat

—I love you

—Andrew and the bed issue

—Nightmares

—Do they learn to talk to each other?

—Blaming Neil for Drake

—Andrew comforting Neil?

—Neil’s fondest memory of Andrew

—Neil getting Andrew off for the first time

—Neil seeing Andrew naked

—Neil & the sex how-to

—How was the first time

—Where’d it happen?

—When was their first hug?

—“I won’t let you let me be”

—Their roadtrips

—Neil waking Andrew up

—Andrew’s real smile

—How does Andrew show appreciation for Neil

—Their happiest moments

—Does Neil ever make Andrew laugh?

—Does Andrew take comfort in Neil

—Does Andrew get protective/possessive?

—Doesn’t Neil crave affection?

—Andrew re: Neil’s panic attacks

—Media reaction to Andrew/Neil

—Further reaction to Andrew/Neil

—On “accidentally” sitting in laps

—What if Andrew died?

—What if Neil died?

—Reaction to getting hit on by others

—Do they celebrate anniversaries?

—The first time Neil pushes Andrew down

FOXES

—How tall are the Foxes?

—Why is everyone so short?

—Where did their names come from?

—What were their majors?

—What do the Foxes look like?

—What are their Hogwarts houses?

—Reaction to the kidnapping

—Do Neil & Renee become friends?

—What did Allison do with Seth’s urn?

—Nicky’s evolution over the drafts

—Do the Foxes get their skiing trip?

—Does Andrew know Nicky kissed Neil?

—When did Aaron & Katelyn fall for each other?

—How did Andrew and Wymack end up handcuffed together?

—Kevin’s favorite things

—Kevin and Andrew’s on-court kerfuffle

—Dan’s haircut

—Dan & Matt’s relationship

—Dan & Matt’s first kiss

—Matt bouncing back from Columbia

—Matt rooming with the monsters

—The other what-if OT3 aka D/M/N and the dynamic

—Do Allison and Renee have the hots for each other?

—Matt forgiving his father

—Any mistletoe shenanigans?

—Thanksgiving and the Foxes

—Kevin’s best friend

—Janie Smalls

—How did Kevin and Thea meet?

—Foxes’ favorite ice cream flavors

—Kevin & Andrew’s on-court argument

—Foxes’ taste in music

—Kevin’s middle name & drink of choice

—Do Kevin & Neil want to kiss?

—Which Fox would Kevin kiss, then?

—Kevin’s best non-Exy memory

—Allison’s three bets

—Why is Allison’s middle name Jamaica

—Kevin, Andrew, and Neil staying friends

—“Joan of Exy”?

—Can the Foxes sing?

—Some of the Foxes’ previous bets

—Do Nicky & Allison become friends?

—Are Foxes based on RL people?

—Nicky when Neil asks about friendship

—Dan & the monsters in Columbia

—What if Kevin was killed?

—Renee and her near-death experiences

—More background available on Renee?

—Why doesn’t Aaron let the Foxes in?

—Team’s reaction to Drake, Andrew’s reaction to being outed

—Andrew & Aaron’s time with Tilda

—Does Aaron reconcile with Andrew over Tilda?

—Nicky & his parents after Drake

—Foxes thoughts in Baltimore

FOXES POST-TKM

—The Pro Teams

—The Weddings

—Neil as the Best Man?

—Kevin after TKM —Thea, Jean, Foxes, and Riko

—How does Kevin & Wymack’s relationship evolve?

—Renee after TKM

—Nicky after TKM

—Aaron after TKM

—Allison after TKM

—Dan & Matt after TKM

—Dan and the US Court

—Any pro-period scandals?

—Andrew & Neil’s relationship with their team

—Would Neil hold Matt’s children?

—Neil & babysitting the Foxes’ kids

—Which Fox’s child would curse first

THE FUTURE FOXES

—Who is Robin Cross?

—Neil and Jack

—Andrew’s reaction to Neil punching Jack

—Foxes’ reaction to Neil punching

—Kevin and Jack

—Neil’s new recruit

—Andrew and Jack

RIVALS

—Who is Riko Moriyama?

—Riko & Kevin’s evolving relationship

—More about Riko & Kevin’s past

—How did Riko break Kevin’s hand

—Riko’s brutality toward Jean

—Any draft where Riko wasn’t killed?

—Were Riko, Kevin, and Jean involved sexually?

—Does the Fox-Trojan rematch happen? Also how do the Trojans & Jean get along?

—Do Alvarez & Laila (Trojans) have backstories?

—Thea’s number & thoughts on Raven brutality

THE “ADULTS”

—Kayleigh Day & David Wymack

—Abby Winfield & David Wymack

—Wymack’s parents

—Did Wymack cry during the trilogy?

—Did Kayleigh know about the Moriyamas?

Nora & the Foxes

—Fancast and Andrew

—Changing opinion of Foxes over the years

—Bits of the scrapped K/N/A threesome here and here

—The KxAxN AU where Kevin died

—Will there be a sequel?

—What inspired you to develop Exy?

—Fox fanfictions, collected by coldsaturn

—Why a pseudonym?

—What came first, characters or story?

—Were you the artist of the comic version?

—What did the comic-Foxes look like?

—What do you do when you’re not writing?

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musicforastylesrestaurant · 4 months

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Underneath The Tree.

my masterlist || ask me anything <3

in which, since officially dating harry for a total of eight years now, courting for three, being married for three and parents for two, you’ve both given each other, such wonderful gifts over the years, and here’s a few of them.

word count - 4.2k

December 25th, 2016.

The soft glow of Christmas lights adorned the living room, casting a warm ambiance that enveloped you and Harry. Nestled next to the adorned tree, its branches cradling memories of past and present, you shared the magic of your first Christmas together. The room echoed with the subtle crackling of a fireplace, dancing flames adding to the festive charm.

In the quiet moments between the two of you, the air was filled with a sense of coziness and joy. Harry's arm wrapped gently around you, you both sat in a peaceful embrace, savouring the serenity of the holiday. The scent of pine wafted through the room, mingling with the sweet aroma of freshly baked cookies—a joint effort earlier in the day as you navigated the kitchen together, sharing laughter and flour-dusted kisses.

Later in the day, you would venture to each other's families, weaving through the tapestry of traditions that made your bond even richer. Yet, in this tranquil interlude by the tree, you found the essence of the season—wrapped in love, shared glances, and the promise of many more Christmases to come.

But for now, it was time to give each other the main presents that you got each other.

Harry, with his long, curly hair tied into a messy man bun, looks comfortably relaxed in joggers and a hoodie. The anticipation lingers in the air as you hand him a beautifully wrapped gift, a twinkle in your eye.

"Go on, open it," you encourage, a smile playing on your lips. Harry's eyes light up with curiosity as he tears away the wrapping paper, revealing a sleek box. When he opens it, he's met with a pair of tickets nestled within. His gaze flickers from the tickets to you, confusion and surprise etched on his face.

"Two tickets to a weekend retreat," you announce, your excitement bubbling over. "I thought it would be a perfect getaway for us."

Harry looks at the tickets, then back at you, a mixture of disbelief and joy in his expression.

"Seriously? How did y’manage this?" he asks, his voice a blend of curiosity and amusement.

You chuckle, enjoying his reaction.

"Well, I may have had a little chat with management," you tease, a mischievous grin dancing on your lips. "We leave Monday."

Harry's eyes widen, and a grin slowly spreads across his face.

"You're amazing," he declares, pulling you in for a deep, appreciative kiss. The warmth of the moment deepens as you share laughter and excitement, the promise of a spontaneous adventure adding a special spark to your first Christmas together.

With a grin that mirrors your own excitement, Harry reaches for a set of beautifully wrapped packages.

"Y’turn," he says, handing them over with a twinkle in his eye. Eagerly, you begin to unwrap them, revealing two elegant jewellery boxes. Your curiosity piqued, you open the boxes to find matching gold cross necklaces nestled inside, one for you and one for Harry.

His eyes lock onto yours, a mix of anticipation and affection.

"I thought it would be something meaningful f’both of us," he explains, his voice soft with sincerity. "T’have a piece of each other wherever we go."

You're touched by the thoughtful gesture, and a warm smile spreads across your face. "They're beautiful, H. I love them."

He grins, clearly pleased with your reaction.

"I wanted something that would symbolise our connection," he continues, reaching over to take one of the necklaces out of the box. "Here, let me put y’on."

As he clasps the delicate chain around your neck, the weight of the cross feels like a tangible bond between you. You watch as Harry puts on his own necklace, the matching gold crosses now adorning both of you.

"They say gold represents enduring love," he says, his gaze lingering on the necklace. "I thought it was fitting f’us."

You reach over and gently touch the cross on his chest, a silent acknowledgment of the sentiment. "It's perfect, H. I couldn't have asked for a better gift."

December 25th, 2017.

The second Christmas together unfolds with an air of shared warmth and familiarity. The room is adorned with the soft glow of lights, casting a warm ambiance that complements the joy in the air.

As you hand Harry a meticulously wrapped gift, there's a twinkle in your eye, knowing that this particular present holds the potential for genuine surprise.

Harry, with his short, cropped hair for a recent film role, receives the gift with a curious gleam in his eyes.

The wrapping paper gives way, revealing a framed Manchester United shirt inside. His expression shifts from curiosity to delight as he takes in the iconic red and white stripes.

His fingers gently trace over the imprinted name of his all-time favourite player, Rio Ferdinand.

"No way," he breathes, his voice a mixture of shock and excitement. "S’this real?"

Your smile widens, a blend of amusement and satisfaction. "It's not just any shirt. Open it up."

Harry lifts the frame, his eyes widening in astonishment as he discovers Rio Ferdinand's unmistakable signature proudly adorning the shirt.

A gasp escaped his lips. "This is signed by Rio Ferdinand! How did y’manage t’get this?"

You nod, your eyes sparkling with the joy of the surprise. "I thought you might like a piece of your football hero to hang on the wall."

Harry, still processing the unexpected revelation, is at a loss for words. "Y’didn't tell me it was signed! This is incredible."

Your laughter fills the room, a musical backdrop to the shared moment. "I may have wanted to see your reaction. It's all worth it now."

As Harry continues to marvel at the framed treasure in his hands, you explain how you orchestrated the surprise – a combination of connections and a bit of good luck.

The story adds depth to the gift, turning it into a tale of effort and thoughtfulness.

"You're sneaky, but I love it. Thank you so much," he finally says, his eyes reflecting both disbelief and gratitude.

The room is now charged with a shared sense of joy, the surprise gift becoming a centerpiece of your second Christmas together.

The evening unfolds with a tapestry of conversation, weaving through stories of football matches, childhood dreams, and the journey of the past year.

The framed, signed shirt becomes a symbol of shared passions and thoughtful gestures, creating a memory that adds another layer to your evolving story as a couple.

Harry, still in awe of the gift, reflects on the impact football has had on his life. "Y’know, I used t’dream about playing on a big stage like that, with thousands cheering. S’funny how a game can shape y’dreams."

He always told you that when he was little he used to want to be a footballer like Rio, but then that changed and he studied law at college and now he was a household name.

You nod, captivated by the sincerity in his voice. "Football has a way of connecting people, inspiring dreams, and creating memories. I thought having a piece of that magic would be special for us."

Harry gazes at the framed treasure, a nostalgic smile playing on his lips. "You've given me more than just a signed jersey. You've given me a piece of m’childhood dreams, wrapped up in our story."

The conversation takes a turn as you discuss plans for the future, prompted by the dreams sparked by the framed jersey.

"Maybe we can catch a live match together next year," you suggest. "Experience the energy and excitement of the stadium."

Harry's eyes light up with enthusiasm. "Absolutely! That would be incredible."

"Every time I look at this, I'll be reminded of this beautiful Christmas and the dreams we're weaving together," Harry says, his eyes reflecting gratitude.

December 25th, 2018.

The third Christmas together arrives, and the room is aglow with the warm hues of festive lights. You and Harry find yourselves seated next to the tree, the air filled with a blend of excitement and comfort as you exchange gifts. The last present of the morning rests in your hands, a mysterious package from Harry that adds an extra layer of anticipation to the moment.

With a playful glint in his eyes, Harry asks you to close your eyes, guiding you to stand up while holding your hands gently. The room is enveloped in a tranquil hush, creating an atmosphere charged with expectancy.

"Keep ‘em closed," Harry says softly, his voice carrying a subtle excitement. You nod, a mixture of curiosity and exhilaration building within you.

"Now, open y’eyes," he instructs, and as you do, the sight that meets you takes your breath away.

Harry is down on one knee, a small box in his hand, and his eyes gleam with a mixture of nerves and deep affection.

The room seems to hold its breath, and your heart quickens.

"Harry..." you begin, your voice barely a whisper, as tears of emotion pool in your eyes.

He smiles, a tender expression on his face. "M’love, I can't help but marvel at the journey we've embarked on together. This past year has been a beautiful chapter in the book of our lives, and with each passing moment, my love f’you has only deepened."

Harry's gaze intensifies, as if he's navigating the depth of his emotions. "I think about the laughter we've shared, the challenges we've faced, and the unwavering support we've provided each other. Y’been m’rock, m’confidante, and m’greatest source of joy."

The vulnerability in his voice resonates deeply, and your emotions swell. Harry takes a moment, as if savouring the significance of the words he's about to speak. "From t’moment we met, I knew there was something extraordinary about you. You've brought a richness to m’life that I never knew was possible, and with each passing day, I find new reasons to fall in love with you."

The room seems to hold its breath, captivated by the sincerity of Harry's words.

“Will you make me the happiest man in the world and marry me?"

The gravity of the question hangs in the air, and you're momentarily lost for words. The depth of his sincerity and the love reflected in his eyes create a poignant moment.

"Harry, I... yes. Yes, a thousand times yes," you finally manage to say, your voice a blend of joy and overwhelming emotion.

A radiant smile graces Harry's face as he gently slides the ring onto your finger.

"I love you more than words can express, and I can't wait to spend the rest of my life with you," he declares, his words imbued with a profound sense of commitment.

The room is filled with a sacred pause as you share a tender moment, the promise of forever binding you together.

The ring catches the light, casting a mesmerising glow that seems to infuse the space with an ethereal quality.

"I never want to stop making memories with you," Harry whispers, his gaze unwavering.

December 25th, 2019.

The scent of fresh pine permeated the air, a gentle reminder of the majestic tree standing proudly in the corner, adorned with an array of ornaments and baubles. The flickering flames in the fireplace cast a warm, golden hue, creating a cozy ambiance that beckoned you and Harry into its .embrace

The plush carpet beneath your feet felt like a velvety extension of the holiday spirit, and the air hummed with a quiet anticipation. The room was a symphony of reds and greens, with stockings hanging from the mantelpiece like eager sentinels, waiting to be filled with festive surprises. A soft, nostalgic melody emanated from a record player, weaving through the air and adding a touch of timeless elegance to the surroundings.

The Christmas tree itself was a masterpiece, its branches adorned with an eclectic collection of ornaments—each one a cherished memory from the past four years.

It was the fourth Christmas you and Harry had shared, but this one held a unique significance – the first as his fiancée.

you handed Harry a meticulously wrapped box, a bow echoing the festive colors. Your eyes sparkled with excitement as he accepted the gift.

"Merry Christmas, my love," you said, your voice carrying the joy of the season.

With a playful grin, Harry began unwrapping the gift, curiosity dancing in his eyes.

"I wonder what m’soon-to-be wife has in store for me this year," he teased, fingers deftly peeling away the paper.

As Harry unwrapped the present, his eyes widened in surprise at the sight of a sleek Polaroid camera nestled within the box.

"A Polaroid camera?" he exclaimed, a mixture of curiosity and delight in his voice.

You smiled, your eyes meeting his.

"Yes, I thought it would be perfect for your upcoming tour," you explained. "I know you've been planning it for your new album, and I wanted to make sure you could capture every show and all those important moments, even when I can't be there with you."

His gaze softened with gratitude as he took in the thoughtful gesture.

"Y’always know how to make every moment special," he said, his fingers tracing the contours of the camera. "S’amazing. Now I can carry a piece of y’with me on the road."

"It's not just about the camera, H," you replied, your voice sincere. "It's about preserving the memories and creating a tangible record of your journey. You'll be surrounded by fans and experiences, and I want you to have a way to hold onto those moments, no matter where you are."

He nodded, a deep appreciation in his eyes. "I love that idea. It'll be like having y’right there with me, capturing the essence f’each show and the places we visit."

As he explored the features of the camera, you leaned in and gently kissed his cheek.

"Consider it a way to share the adventure, even when we're miles apart," you whispered, the promise of your love carried in those words.

December 25th, 2020.

It was your fifth Christmas with Harry, yet this year held an unmistakable difference. The world outside your cozy haven was in the grip of a global lockdown, casting a quiet stillness over the usually bustling streets of London.

Seated beneath the tree, mugs of hot cocoa cradled in your hands, you and Harry found solace in each other's company. The usual holiday gatherings and festivities were replaced by an intimate setting, the two of you wrapped in blankets as a subtle chill lingered in the air.

The hushed sounds of a city on pause created a backdrop to the crackling of the fireplace, weaving a bittersweet melody.

Despite the circumstances, the glow of the Christmas lights illuminated the room with a reassuring warmth. The tree, adorned with ornaments collected over the years, stood as a testament to the memories you and Harry had shared.

As you exchanged glances over the rims of your cocoa-filled mugs, a silent understanding passed between you—a recognition of the strength found in love during times of uncertainty.

Earlier in the day, you had eagerly presented Harry with your carefully chosen gift.

Harry, with a twinkle in his eye, promised that your present would be arriving shortly. As you sat by the tree, wrapped in blankets with mugs of hot cocoa in hand, anticipation hung in the air like a delicate melody.

Suddenly, a resonant knock echoed through the room, causing your heart to leap with excitement.

You bolted to your feet, the warmth of the blankets still clinging to you, and Harry, with a mischievous smile, motioned for you to close your eyes.

"Keep 'em shut, m’love," he urged as he went to answer the door.

Anxiously, you waited, the seconds stretching into an eternity.

"Okay, open your eyes," Harry declared.

As your eyes fluttered open, you were met with a sight that left you utterly and pleasantly surprised.

There, standing at the threshold with beaming smiles, were your mum and dad.

Tears welled up in your eyes as you rushed towards them, disbelief and joy mingling on your face.

"Mum, Dad, how...?" you stammered, enveloping them in a tight embrace. Harry stood back, his eyes gleaming with happiness at the success of the surprise.

Your mum, still holding you close, smiled warmly.

"We wanted to surprise you, love. We've missed you so much," she said, her voice choked with emotion.

Your dad, joining the embrace, added, "We took Covid tests and made the journey to be here for Christmas. It's been a tough year, and we couldn't imagine spending it without you."

As you all settled back under the tree, the room filled with the warmth of shared love and the rich aroma of cocoa.

"I can't believe you're here," you said, wiping away happy tears.

Your mum chuckled, "Nothing can keep us away from our family, especially not a lockdown."

Harry, having played a key role in orchestrating this heartwarming surprise, joined the emotional reunion.

"I may have had a small part in this surprise," he admitted with a grin. "Y’folks insisted on making y’Christmas special, and who was I to say no?"

The remainder of the evening unfolded in a beautiful blur of laughter, stories, and shared moments.

December 25th, 2021.

In the glow of the Christmas lights, you and Harry celebrated your sixth holiday season together, marking the second as a married couple.

The air was infused with a special kind of warmth, a blend of love and shared history that only deepened with each passing year. As the evening unfolded, you couldn't wait to exchange gifts, eager to see the joy in Harry's eyes.

After Harry opened the gift you had carefully chosen for him, his eyes lit up with appreciation.

"Y’always know how t’make everything feel magical," he said, leaning in for a sweet kiss.

You chuckled at his excitement, quoting one of his songs, "Looks like you've got no control, Harry."

His laugh echoed through the room as he playfully rolled his eyes.

"Okay, okay, I'll try t’contain m’excitement, but no promises," he teased.

You handed him a box, neatly wrapped and adorned with a bow.

"Merry Christmas, my love," you said, your heart fluttering with excitement. Harry eagerly tore away the tissue paper, revealing the contents of the box.

His eyes widened as he saw the pregnancy test and a tiny baby grow tucked inside.

He looked up at you, a mix of disbelief and joy on his face.

"Is this... is this real?" he asked, his voice filled with emotion.

You nodded, tears shimmering in your eyes as you confirmed, "Yes, H. We're going to be parents."

The room seemed to hold its breath as Harry processed the incredible news. His eyes never left yours as he carefully cradled the pregnancy test and the baby grow.

"I'm going to be a dad," he whispered, his voice filled with a mixture of awe and love.

You nodded again, unable to hold back the tears of happiness that now spilled freely.

"We're going to be parents, Harry," you whispered, reaching out to hold his hands. His grin stretched from ear to ear as he pulled you into a tight embrace, his excitement matching yours.

Amidst the soft glow of Christmas lights, you and Harry shared a moment that would forever be etched in your memories. The room echoed with laughter, love, and the promise of a new chapter.

As Harry held the pregnancy test and baby grow close, you both reveled in the magic of the season and the incredible gift of starting a family together.

December 25th, 2022.

In the soft glow of the seventh Christmas lights, your home was filled with a warmth that went beyond the twinkling decorations. This year marked a significant milestone as you and Harry celebrated your first Christmas as parents to a little two-month-old son named Arthur.

As the fireplace crackled, casting dancing shadows on the walls, you couldn't help but marvel at the joy that this tiny bundle brought into your lives.

Arthur's birth, just two months ago, was a moment etched in time. Contrary to expectations, his arrival was like a gentle whisper of snow – serene and magical. The labor was swift, and he seemed to come into the world with a spirit of lightness. With his shock of curls and green eyes that mirrored Harry's, Arthur was a testament to the beauty of new beginnings and the shared features of a loving family.

As the days turned into weeks, Arthur became a living embodiment of joy. His laughter echoed through the halls, bringing a sense of completeness to your home. His tiny fingers wrapped around yours, and his coos seemed to create a melody that underscored the holiday season. The Christmas tree, adorned with ornaments collected over the years, now held a new significance as it watched over your growing family.

Harry handed you a delicately wrapped gift, a gleam of anticipation in his eyes. As Arthur lay peacefully in his arms, fast asleep on Harry's chest, you couldn't help but marvel at the scene of your little family by the tree. With a warm smile, you accepted the gift, eager to discover what Harry had chosen for you this Christmas.

Gently unwrapping the package, you revealed a small box, and Harry's eyes sparkled with a mix of excitement and nervousness.

"M’hope y’like it," he said, his voice soft. "S’something special."

Opening the box, you discovered a beautifully crafted bracelet, adorned with a charm that held Arthur's birthstone. Your eyes widened in awe as you traced your fingers over the delicate piece of jewelry.

"Harry, it's stunning," you exclaimed, your heart swelling with emotion.

Harry grinned, a mixture of relief and joy evident in his expression.

"I wanted y’to have something to always carry a piece of Arthur with you," he explained, his voice tender. "His birthstone seemed like the perfect way t’capture the magic f’the day he came into our lives."

You carefully fastened the bracelet around your wrist, the cool metal contrasting with the warmth of the moment.

"It's perfect, Harry. Thank you," you whispered, your gaze lifting to meet his. In that shared glance, you saw the depth of his love and the significance of the thoughtful gift.

As Arthur continued to slumber on Harry's chest, the three of you remained nestled by the Christmas tree.

"I wanted this Christmas to be extra special," Harry admitted, running his fingers through Arthur's soft curls. "With our little family, it already is."

You leaned in, pressing a gentle kiss to Harry's cheek.

"It's more than special, it's perfect," you assured him, your heart overflowing with gratitude for the thoughtful gesture and the love that enveloped you.

December 25th, 2023.

n the soft glow of the eighth Christmas lights, the air was filled with the warmth of shared love and the laughter of family. Under the twinkling tree, you, Harry, and your one-year-old son Arthur created a cozy scene.

Arthur, a complete daddy's boy, nestled on Harry's lap in his pajamas, his messy curls adding an adorable touch to the festive atmosphere.

As you handed Harry his gift, a smile played on your lips, anticipating the joy of the moment.

"This one's from both of us," you said, the excitement palpable in your voice. Arthur, sensing the festive spirit, wiggled in Harry's lap, his eyes wide with curiosity.

Harry's eyes twinkled as he took the gift, Arthur's little hands immediately reaching out to help unwrap it.

"Alright, little buddy, let's see what mama got me," Harry chuckled, sharing a conspiratorial glance with Arthur.

The room echoed with the sounds of paper rustling and Arthur's gleeful laughter.

As Harry unwrapped the present, revealing the photo book filled with memories, his eyes widened in surprise.

"S’this...?" he began, his voice catching with emotion. You nodded, a soft smile playing on your lips, and Harry flipped the cover open to the first page.

The journey through time commenced with the first date, captured in a candid snapshot that froze the excitement of a budding romance.

"Wow, look at us," Harry chuckled, his fingers gently tracing the image. "Seems like a lifetime ago."

The pages turned, unveiling moments etched in your shared history— the first picture together back in 2015, the laughter and love evident in the captured smiles.

"Remember this?" you asked, a fondness in your voice.

As the pages continued to unfold, Harry's eyes moved to the night he proposed on Christmas Day back in 2018.

"That was the best Christmas ever," he reminisced, his gaze lingering on the image of that magical moment.

Arthur glanced at the photos in the book and , began hitting the pages, yelling "Dada" with infectious joy as he recognized the familiar face.

The journey of the photo book brought forth the day Arthur was born, a pivotal chapter that transformed your lives.

"Look at him, our little guy," Harry exclaimed, a proud smile on his face as Arthur gleefully pointed at pictures of his dada. "S’grown so much."

Amidst the turning pages, the room resonated with laughter, nostalgia, and the shared joy of reliving cherished memories.

"Y’captured every milestone, every smile," Harry remarked, his eyes expressing a depth of gratitude.

Arthur, fully engrossed in the photo book, continued hitting the pages with exuberance.

"Dada! Dada!" he repeated, his small hands reaching out as if trying to touch the images of his father.

As the journey through the photo book neared its end, Harry's eyes were filled with a mixture of love and awe.

"S’is the most thoughtful gift," he said, pulling you into a tender embrace.

"Thank you f’capturing our story."

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carlos-in-glasses · 6 months

Text

Where All This Love Comes From

I'm so excited to share what has been known as Flashback Fic! 107k words, with all 14 chapters here on Ao3, rated E.

Six months after Gabriel Reyes’ death, TK grows concerned about Carlos’ drinking and brings him to a meeting at the Y. Afterwards, over omelets at the diner, the husbands open up to each other. TK reflects on meeting Carlos after years of addiction and self-destruction, while Carlos has continued to seek closure by uncovering two unknowns: The identity of his father’s killer, and how his father truly felt about Carlos as his son.

************************************************

Carlos puts his arms around him from behind and holds him still, kissing his neck. TK tries to twist in Carlos’ grip, but he won’t let him. He starts walking him towards the bedroom. “I’m desperate for you,” TK says, his blood hot, cheeks red, eyes pricking with tears. “I know.” “Make me forget everything.” “I will.” “I only want to think about you.” “You will.” Carlos stops for a breath. He smells TK – his clean hair, his evanesced cologne, his natural man scent, his salty tears that have imbued his skin, the sweat of stress. Sad, but still beautiful to Carlos. TK, delicious. “I never thought I’d have you. I never thought–” he can’t speak anymore.

***********************************************

Chapter 1: A Trail to Follow

In 2023, TK discovers something that triggers memories of heroin withdrawal seven years before – and Carlos makes amends with Gutiérrez after accusing him of his father’s murder.

Chapter 2: A Very Nice Sweater for the 'Y'

TK takes Carlos to the N.A. meeting – but when things don’t go as hoped, he instigates another method to get Carlos talking.

Chapter 3: Snowballing

A messy situation in 2010 causes TK as a high school junior to lash out. In 2023, Carlos realizes it's time to tell TK about one more secret.

Chapter 4: Original Sin

In 2013, Carlos accidentally destroys Gabriel’s oldest friendship. Nine years later, he attempts to make peace after he and TK get engaged.

Chapter 5: Between Two Bridges

In 2022, a grieving and struggling TK is compelled to talk to Owen about his 2020 overdose, which leads him to remember when his addiction nearly killed him years before. In 2023, TK asks Carlos about his history with alcohol. (Note: Chapter features TK using and gets fairly graphic)

Chapter 6: One Tequila, Two Tequila, Three Tequila, Floor

TK and Carlos compare notes on when they first came out – with Carlos spiraling in 2011 after an unexpected outburst, while TK in 2008 is embraced (and embarrassed) by his parents. In 2021, both handle the raw days of their breakup differently too.

Chapter 7: A Boy's Best Friend

In 2009, Gabriel attempts to connect with his increasingly distant and unhappy teenage son. In 2013, the fallout of Carlos leaving Iris has begun, and he knows his relationship with his parents will never be the same. In 2023, TK tries to talk to Gabriel about the bombshell revelation that Carlos doesn’t want kids.

Chapter 8: Your Heart, As If It Was My Very Own

In 2011, TK is left bewildered after he loses his virginity. Years later, with Carlos, TK's mind (among other things) is blown in a whole new way. In 2022, TK has an important conversation with a certain visitor when he wakes from his coma.

Chapter 9: Coffee with Gutiérrez

In September 2023, Carlos seeks an important but painful truth from Gutiérrez, and finds an unexpected ally within the 126. Two months later in Blue Moon Diner, TK gets ready to tell Carlos more about his past in New York.

Chapter 10: The Day Begins Like Any Other

In 2016, after TK experiences an assault and sees an old friend again under devastating circumstances, he makes a life-altering decision when his dealer suggests he try something new. In 2009, TK is attacked at school. (Note: Please heed the tags and the chapter note. Reader discretion advised. Look after your hearts).

Chapter 11: Lonely as a Sparrow in the Rain

When Carlos confesses to TK about where he went with Judd back in September – and why – TK has to tell Carlos something he won't want to hear. In 2014, a rift develops when Carlos shows off his new Camaro to his parents.

Chapter 12: Happy For You, Son

Before moving to Austin, TK falls out with his parents over his relationship with Alex. In December 2020, it's a different story as Carlos hosts Owen and Gwyn for TK's birthday meal. In 2012, Carlos has some unexpected news for his own parents, but Michelle tries to intervene. When TK and Carlos get engaged a decade later, Gabriel has something to say about it.

Chapter 13: The Risk of Love

In May 2023, Owen and TK save a spiraling Carlos from making the biggest mistake of his life when he thinks he’s found his father’s killer. In 2020, TK and Carlos become boyfriends beneath a sky full of aurora borealis.

Chapter 14: A Night Worth Celebrating

On a rainy night in 2020, TK and Carlos meet for the first time. In 2023, weeks after their big talk at Blue Moon, TK celebrates his thirtieth birthday with his husband, their family and their friends by his side – and Carlos is a little bit better at sharing his secrets.

Read on A03

#Where All This Love Comes From #Flashback Fic #cig fic #my fic #Tarlos #tarlos fanfic #tk strand x carlos reyes #I've been working on this since March so I'm beyond delighted and relieved to share it #Thank you so much for reading if you do - I cannot explain how much I appreciate it

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the-blue-fairie · 5 months

Text

Art by @shes-an-iso – commissioned by me and posted here with permission

Realization.

It is ten years ago and I am watching Frozen.

It is ten years ago and I am watching Elsa transform herself into her truest self, watching her spin threads of blue around herself, seizing power for herself – radical self-actualization.

The glint of Elsa’s ice dress reflects in my eyes as I watch Elsa strut into the sunlight – and I do not have words for why I am so moved.

I do not have words, but the shimmer stays.

It is ten years ago and I am choosing to become a part of the Frozen fandom.

I have lurked in fandom circles before, but never posted a thing, never made an account.

It is my first time being part of an online fan community – and, as awful as fandoms can be at times, this fandom – for me – ten years ago – is truly a community.

I begin to make friends in the Frozen fandom.

Some of these friends are trans.

The gleam of Elsa’s hair in the rose-gold dawn shines again in my eyes, and shyly, I begin asking questions of my friends.

Realization is nothing without the words to process it – and my friends give me words, my friends help me to understand.

I am a trans woman.

It is in this online space that I first take the name Liza for myself, since this online space is the only place that I can allow myself to be.

I build for myself. My blog is my own ice palace. What I cannot sculpt in daily life, I carve within online spaces – offering my writing, my thoughts, my edits, my soul to the world.

Everyone here knows me as Liza.

Even as I’m in the closet to my family for years, in here, I am Liza. My friends know me as I am, and as Liza is all they will ever know me.

But I am in the closet. For years.

(It’s why Do You Want to Build a Snowman still breaks me.)

In the closet more out of some misplaced sense of duty to my family than out of dread, though I am scared. Always scared. And then in the closet because I feel it’s better if I bury this. Not better for me, but for them. If I’m bleeding inside, it doesn’t matter. I can put on a show. I have fine-woven gloves. Well-taught decorum. Be the good girl you always have to be, etc.

(Maybe it’s my fault I’m in the closet for years. Anons on this site have told me that in the past. I don’t have it as bad as others in the closet, I’m just a coward, the fault is mine, the fault is mine…)

Fuck off.

(People blame Elsa for the thirteen years in the same way, placing the blame on her and not the tutelage that trained her, because her parents loved her, you see, and love becomes a convenient means of shifting blame to the victim.)

In June 2016, after the Pulse shooting, I make a post about how I’m never going to come out. I am terrified, heartbroken, mangled by grief – but my friends are there for me. My friends send me messages of support, of compassion.

I still cherish the memory of those.

Years pass. When I finally come out to my father, I can barely say the words, barely look him in the eye.

It is ten years since Frozen and I have come out to my family – far too late. I have been on HRT more than a year now.

(My dad still misgenders me when he thinks I’m out of earshot. He resents when I get frustrated with him over this.)

It is ten years since Frozen and I am Elsa on the North Mountain, staring into the whirlwind of an uncertain future, defiant and scared.

And I know – I know – that I didn’t process I was trans because of the film – it was because of the friendship of fellow trans people, trans people who happened to be Frozen fans a decade ago – but my journey of self-realization, my time in the closet, my creation of a sense of self, are so entwined with memories of Frozen that I can’t help but think of it when thinking about my own transition…

Can’t help but think of Elsa, hips swaying, arms outstretched, flashing, radiant –

Happy tenth anniversary, Frozen.

And thank you. Thank you.

(This is okay to reblog. In fact, please do. It is a sliver of my soul that I offer to the world.)

#frozen #elsa #transgender #trans #bigfrozensix #disney frozen

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dayoldtea · 1 year

Text

INSTAGRAM BLURB

pairing: harry styles x brazilian!famous!reader

fc: bruna marquezine

a/n: this is long

2012

2016

liked by harrystyles, selenagomez and 12,517,882 others

yourinstagram Wow! I can't believe it's been a year of @ipanema 🇧🇷 My favorite childhood memories are connected to the summer, the sun and the sea, and with every new design designed, be it bikinis or accessories, I feel a little more connected to that little girl who counted the days until the weekend, because it meant my feet would touch the warm sand of Ipanema Beach again. So much has happened in one year and I can't wait to see what the future holds for us! Thanks for all the support so far, it means the world and I can't wait for you to see our new designs!! 💚💛 Head over to @ipanema to get 30% OFF the entire store! Limited birthday discount! ☀️

view all comments

user81 she's so pretty 😭

user61 harry liked the post just a few seconds after yn posted it 😃

⤷ user42 this man has her notifications turned on, i swear to god

user21 okay harry, we get it

user34 i'm so proud of you

user12 this is what i think i look like

user55 all right yn, here's my whole paycheck

harrystyles congratulations ❤️

liked by yourinstagram and 3,018,164 others

⤷ user96 WHAT

⤷ user48 HARRRRYYYYY

⤷ user82 QHWIOWHWEIWOWJAKAKALAKA

⤷ user10 i bet he sent this comment and then threw the phone out the window

⤷ user02 the poor man has been waiting for an answer for almost five years 😭 #prayforharry

liked by user7, user55 and 717,011 others

harry_update HARRY AND Y/N/Y/L/N TONIGHT IN LA!!! I REPEAT: HARRY AND Y/N/Y/L/N TONIGHT IN LA!!!!!!!!!

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user44 FINALLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

user06 i love how the whole fandom was just rooting for harry to finally take her on a date

user71 i feel like a proud mother

user92 THE WAY HE'S HOLDING HER

user66 omg twitter must be collapsing

user04 y/n/y/l/n is the only woman who can keep harry styles waiting five years for a date

user12 when a latina wins, all latinas win along with her 🥳

user29 THIS IS SO ADORABLE 😭😭

user73 am i the only one who doesn't want them to be together?

⤷ user40 yes

⤷ user33 yes

⤷ user81 yes

liked by taylorswift, niallhoran and 31,981,277 others

harrystyles I finally got that call

harrystyles has disabled comments

2017

liked by user10, user20 and 471,839 others

ynandharryupdates the puppy appearing on harry's lap in the kiwi music video was a gift from him to yn. welcome, oat!

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user63 CRYING

user99 so lovely 😭😭

user03 i'm sure it was yn's idea to have puppies in the video lol

⤷ user62 that's exactly what i thought 😂

user55 harry is so whipped, and i am so happy for him

user30 this is the most adorable puppy ever

user44 he's smiling for the camera

user52 just a few days ago yn said on a live stream that she missed having a pet at home, but that she didn't know how she would manage since she had upcoming projects that required long trips. it seems that harry decided that they should share custody 🥺

2018

liked by user93, user07 and 327,016 others

enews Harry met with his girlfriend's parents, the brazilian actress and businesswoman Y/N/Y/L/N, this morning at a hotel in Rio de Janeiro. Some sources say that Y/L/N's absence in her homeland is associated with projects she is working on.

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user53 something about harry taking advantage of his concert schedule in brazil to see yn's parents even if she is not present makes me weak in the knees

user88 i'm so looking forward to yn's next works! hope to see her acting again soon ❤️

user94 yn taught him to speak portuguese? yn's parents speak english? i'm so curious now lol

⤷ user51 yn's parents speak english! they had to live in the usa for a while to accompany her to the auditions when she was still a minor (nowadays her mother teaches english at a school in brazil, btw).

⤷ user53 yn's parents speak english, but harry said in an interview with nick grimshaw for bbc music that yn was teaching him portuguese so he could communicate with her parents via facetime

⤷ user94 pls this is so cute! thanks for the explanation

user06 knowing how much yn loves going to rio and being close to her family, i'm sure she felt bad for not being able to accompany harry to his shows in brazil, so seeing him close to her parents must make her very happy ❤️

2019

liked by harrystyles, zendaya and 32,967,501 others

yourinstagram Euphoria coming soon to HBO.

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arianagrande YAAAAAA I CANT WAIT

user25 MAIN CHARACTER

user52 soooooo gooood

annetwist gorgeous

user18 i am so excited for this

harrystyles I couldn't be prouder! te amo, H x

⤷ yourinstagram love u too, H ❤️

⤷ user44 literal parents

⤷ user83 i'm so single 😃

⤷ user90 crying as i question my existence

user02 FREAKING OUT

liked by yourinstagram, harris_reed and 28,853,481 others

harrystyles FINE LINE . THE ALBUM . DEC 13

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gucci ❤️

user43 thank you @yourinstagram

user88 IM FUCKING READY OH MY GOSH

user06 what about medicine, sir??????????

user14 can't wait to listen and then look for theories about which songs are about yn

user62 i'm so proud

yourinstagram i know i've said this about a million times now, but you make me more and more proud every day. te amo! ❤️

⤷ harrystyles love you more my sunflower muse, H x

⤷ user91 SOBBING

⤷ user54 SUNFLOWER IS ALREADY THE BEST SONG

⤷ user09 imagine being harry styles' muse 😃

user91 WTF IS ERODA

2020

liked by user86, user31 and 581,740 others

harryflorals All accessories and swimwear used by the models in the watermelon sugar video are part of the new collection of yn's swimwear brand, @ipanema. According to the brand's website, the pre-sale will be available tomorrow.

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user60 SHE IS THE MOMENT

user23 talented, brilliant, incredible, amazing, show stopping, spectacular, never the same, totally unique, completely not ever been done before

user51 I KNEW

user45 I LOVE IT

user78 this song, this video… everything screams yn 😃

user64 the way she always uses harry to promote herself

⤷ user13 what? yn's brand was extremely popular even before she started dating harry. shut up.

user05 IT COUPLE

liked by user53, user03 and 359,721 others

ynshine just leaving this here

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user12 the cutest

user44 my parents

user25 i just love them

yourinstagram @harrystyles

⤷ harrystyles darling, i can explain…

⤷ user62 SCREAMING

⤷ ynshine the user of this account is dead

2021

liked by lizzobeeating, gemmastyles and 14,368,001 others

harrystyles late night talking

harrystyles has disabled comments

liked by harrystyles, mitchrowland and 20,014,613 others

yourinstagram loving on tour

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user61 SUPPORTIVE GF

user18 i'm obsessed with her

user11 hi, yn! idk if you remember me or if you will see this comment, but i was at the harry concert last night and ended up having a serious anxiety crisis due to the crowd. i was unaccompanied, and as much as the other girls next to me tried to help me, there wasn't much they could do. idk how, but you saw me from somewhere near the stage, offered me water and a safe place to stay until the show was over. i had saved up for many months for this show, and if it wasn't for you, my anxiety would have completely ruined my whole experience. thank you for helping me and being the sweetest person ever ❤️

⤷ yourinstagram of course I remember you, dear! hope you are feeling better, take care! ❤️

⤷ user69 literal angel

⤷ user16 harry is so lucky

user82 i love this relationship so much

user36 i was already crying when I read the caption

2022

liked by zendaya, annetwist, and 37,8941,241 others

harrystyles Harry's House. May 20th.

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user21 i cant

mtv i will never recover emotionally from this

billieeilish having a breakdown

user87 the message behind the name of the album and the photo he chose to promote it

user52 twitter crashed

user11 mom and dad

gemmastyles the all time favorite couple breaking the internet once again

liked by user03, user93 and 921,729 others

harryflorals The exact moment Harry and Y/N see each other on the red carpet at the Venice Film Festival.

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user12 sobbing, crying, vomiting, screaming, blushing, banging my head on the wall, running in circles, pulling my hair out, sliding down the wall

user32 THEY'RE LITERALLY GLOWING

user76 after 10 years harry styles finally gets to live his fanfiction

user57 he's so in love with her

florencepugh SHE GOT THAT CINEMA

user97 GET MARRIED NOW

user50 thanks for the new wallpaper

user44 the real reason why i have high relationship patterns

user36 why didn't they go together?

⤷ user07 harry went earlier to accompany the cast of DWD

user09 the fact that harry is obsessed with her since forever just makes it even better

user80 SOULMATES

#harry styles x reader #harry styles #harry styles social media #harry styles x y/n #famous reader #harry styles x you #harry styles fake ig #harry styles fake social media #boyfriend harry #harry styles x actress!reader #actress reader

1K notes · View notes

jihyoruri · 4 months

Note

bp!yn fun facts plsss???? i kiss her so much it hurts

BP!YN FACTS

bp!yn, was the trainee that everyone was intimidated by because of her beauty

bp!yn, is an ambassador for prada, miumiu, blumarine, hermes

bp!yn, has a lot of collabs with other artists and has six solo songs because of how hard shes fought yg to at least let her have creative freedom over her own music

bp!yn, is a 98 liner but doesn’t act like the youngest at all

bp!yn, has the title as the nations princess

bp!yn, is close friends with joy, jaehyun , nayeon and chanhee

bp!yn, is also still good friends with her ex gf sana

bp!yn, has a LITERAL hold on everyone in korea and has a way of making her way into people’s hearts which is why she has the title as the nation’s princess

bp!yn, has a crazy obsession with my melody

bp!yn, got scouted at a 2ne1 music show in 2009 that her friend dragged her to at 11 years old and because she didn’t come from a wealthy family she made the dumb decision to accept because she thought that she could become a big star and be rich and provide for her family (it’s sad that an 11 year old made that decision for herself but SHE MADE IT and debuted at 17/18)

bp!yn, bought blinks that went to her music show small prada gifts because she found them so cute

bp!yn, is also REALLY close friends with sabrina carpenter

bp!yn, shoved a popular sasaeng so harshly at the airport (who was invading her personal space) that they fell to the ground

bp!yn, is extremely clumsy

bp!yn, was known as the girl that stumbled when blackpink were going to get their best new artist award in 2016

bp!yn, has a vintage camcorder where she films all her memories on

bp!yn, is a victim of the ongoing joke since bp debuted that yn has beef with gdragon since anytime he’s mentioned or she’s in a vid with him she visibly looks like she wants to jump off a roof

bp!yn, biggest scandal was that she was dating Kai right after him and jennie broke up which lead to rumours that she was some kind of other woman (WHICH WAS FAKE!! she literally had a girlfriend at that time)

bp!yn, is the only one out of all the pinks that doesn’t have a pet which makes her the designated pet sitter for the rest of the girls

bp!yn, cover of u go girl went viral on KBS in 2017 and has 67M views

#bp!yn

222 notes · View notes

animatingforfun · 7 months

Text

Made this a few years ago but never shared it as it was just for practice.

Having owned Sara Bareilles’s previous albums, I blindly purchased her then latest album the day it came out. As I listened, I noticed a strong baking and pie theme connecting the songs, which seemed a little strange until I discovered it was an album of songs Sara wrote for a new musical, “Waitress.”

At the time, I didn’t know the story of the musical or of the movie on which the musical is based, but the emotion in the lyrics of the song, “She Used to Be Mine” was so clear, you really felt for the character, and could see who she’s transforming into. It was something I really wanted to draw and animate, just for fun and practice.

I never showed anyone, out of embarrassment, because by that time, my coworkers and I were all geeking out over Jessie Mueller’s rehearsal performance that hit YouTube a few months later in 2016. Her acting was so good and inspiring, and what I had done just didn’t compare.

Clearing out my old animation files from my Nintendo 2DS, I thought I’d finally post it. I used the maximum memory limit of 100 drawings, so the animation feels more like a blocking pose test, but it was really fun to make. :)

#animation #2d animation #nintendo 2ds #nintendo3ds #artists on tumblr #sara bareilles #waitress #she used to be mine

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yourgentlegirlfriend · 1 year

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heyy….. here’s a JUMPSCARE SUPRISE of the part 2 of the Rookie!Leon x Mentor!Reader!! suprise hehehehe… part 3 up soon if you guys really want it!! I LOVE TEASING YOU GUYS BTW.

Disclaimer: This blog is STRICTLY 18+! Please do not interact with my content or my blog if you’re underaged or don’t have an age indication on your blog! Thank you!

Warnings: SIX year time skip! Slight smut themes, harsh and mean leon, breaking into home, rough leon, mentions of knife and fighting and punching

Mentor!Leon x Rookie! Leon

word count: 2016

The downfall of Raccoon City left you jobless. Hopeless, to be more specific. You felt like you had contacted every agency nationwide, trying to send in very few transcripts of your experience and degree.

You making it out was even shocking. Time goes by so fast that memory fades in and out, and the blinking of lighting in the sky shining against your face makes your eyes shift back to reality. You were always stuck in your thoughts. You have finally been accepted to a training program for special services with the government. The phone call when you were received wasn’t very eventful, and they told you that no matter what experience you had, there were no references, so they can’t just take your word. Three weeks of training, then more compliance training, and maybe you’ll get a desk job.

Just go, and get it over with. The bus ride there is thirty minutes, back and forth. Your arm grabbed at the railing as you stood, walking down the aisle. Your earbuds pressed so far into your ears that you still had an empty gaze. On days like today, when it’s rainy, you are reminded of when you were doing the training, shaping people into articulate cops. Having to face those days was hard, especially as you walked into the tall building where the training occurred.

You pulled the loud music from your ears, being met by the silence of the lobby. Your sneakers squeaked against the floor as you stood at the front desk, the woman with her glasses perched on the bridge of her nose peering up at you.

“Name.”

She spoke in her monotone voice. Her lips smacked at the gum in her mouth.

“Um, Y/N.”

Her head was shaking, her bracelets jangling as she typed into the computer in front of her before standing and pointing down the long hallway.

“All the way down, room 17.”

Your eyes followed her finger to see the open room at the end of the hall; your body was telling you to leave; you know you’re supposed to trust your gut. Yet you continued to walk down the hallway, your head poking into the open room.

A man’s back faced you, his hands reading through a file, utterly oblivious to your presence. He wore black cargo pants. He still leaned forward as his eyes scanned over the papers. His blue shirt looked like it was perfectly made for him, is it wrong to admire? No, right?

“Sorry, am I in the right place?”

You finally spoke up, your hand holding at the strap of your purse. The air grew thin as the man turned to you, his eyes deep and his stare narrowing. You felt like the air had been stolen from your lungs.

“Leon?”

Your voice was on the verge of quivering, with your eyes studying his face. He has matured so much, maybe a little too much. His eyes were darker, and he was much broader, with wider shoulders, and he lost that friendly kiss to his face. You honestly thought he had been dead. You checked the death toll on the private case daily, waiting for it to go up or down

Leon cleared his throat, gaining your attention as he stepped to the center of the room. You placed your bag down by the door, walking to the center. How could he see you and just be silent? You couldn’t tell, but he was burning, his heart ached when he pulled open your file, but he found it funny how the tables turned so quickly.

Leon reached into his back pocket, handing you a small pocket knife before pulling out his own. He craned his neck to the side as you stared down at the knife in your hand, your fingers wrapping around the handle in confusion before your body flew back at Leon swinging his pocket knife in your face. You stared up at him, bewildered as his stance had changed entirely, coming down to turn at you again, your knife meeting his. You pushed him back, a familiar sparkle shining off his teeth as he smirked at you slightly. Sweat formed on both of your foreheads as it felt like you were swinging at each other forever, Leon’s leg coming out, pushing you to your back before he reached down, holding at your arms tightly. Since when did he become so strong? Your throat groaned out of defeat as he pushed his blade inches away from your face. He pushed himself off you, whistling at you to get up. Your knees cracked as you pulled yourself to stand. Leon glared down at you.

“You have to be faster. I shouldn’t have even had the opportunity to kick you to the ground. One bad move, and you have a knife right here.”

Leon’s finger pushed between your eyebrows, a hiss quickly leaving his lips as your blade glazed over his skin. His eyes narrowed at you, and he knew you would be hell to train. The two of you continued to swing at each other, your fists balling up as he knocked the knife from your hand.

“What’s your move, rookie?”

Leon’s voice was so taunting. The way he wasn’t even trying is what pissed you off. He dodged most of your punches but not all of them. Your knuckles came in contact with his, his palm opening to close around your fist. So quickly, you were pressed against his chest, his knife to your throat. Your eyes squeezed in frustration as you felt his hot breath on your neck. His grip didn’t last long, pushing you off him. Your fingers reach up to touch the small trickle of blood off your neck from when he pushed you off him.

“Again, faster.”

————

Faster.

Leon’s favorite words.

Exhausted was the only word to describe how you felt. When you trained Leon, you were never this harsh on him; he was a sneaky son of a bitch. Your head is shoved in the pillows of your bed, sprawled out with papers all around the room because Leon quizzes you so randomly that you must be ready.

Leon couldn’t help but stand over you, watching your chest rise and fall. He shook his head before he spun the water in his hand, throwing it down onto your face. You gasped for breath, shooting up and reaching for your gun. Leon marked down a point in his head as he noticed the safety to your gun wasn’t on, your arms flinging as you aimed the gun at him before your eyes fluttered open.

“Leon? Are you fucking.. insane! What if I fucking shot you!”

Your voice rose with every word as your shaky hand pulled at the safety again, laying the gun back down on your bed. Leon snapped his fingers before he clapped his hands together.

“Let’s go. I have a three-mile run for you, now.”

You stared at him, so sleepy. Your head nodded as you flipped him off, standing as he walked towards your bedroom door. His eyes shifted away as you stepped out of bed in the cutest pair of black cotton panties. The conversations between the two of you were short, you never spoke to him, and he never did to you unless it was demands. His back was turned to you as your shaky legs stood, digging through your drawer. You stood in place, staring at the shorts in your drawer before you slammed it shut, crossing your arms as you turned to Leon.

“Leave.”

Leon turned to you, his eyebrows raised. The frustration built in your body as you pointed to the door, your throat growing dry as tears built in your eyes.

“Go! Just leave me the fuck alone! I’ll be at training in the morning. Just leave!”

You screamed, your voice cracking as you rubbed at the bags under your eyes. Walking towards Leon, pushing him out of your room before slamming the floor in his face. Your forehead rested against the door, so sleepy still. Leon stared at the shut door, listening to you lock the door. Leon cursed under his breath as he replayed it all in his head, watching the tears build in your eyes.

It was crazy how easily he shut down all the emotions he felt, his shoes shuffling on the floor as he walked out your front door with a harsh slam.

——

A loud grunt left Leon’s lips as your leg swung under him, dropping him to the floor. Your neck leaned against your shoulders as you cracked it, the pocket knife resting in your hand as you looked down at him. You couldn’t help but laugh as Leon stood, cracking his knuckles.

“Fine, you’ve improved. Is that what you wanna hear, rookie?”

You hummed as you stepped back, wiping the sweat off your forehead and nodding at him with a shrug.

“If I keep putting you on your ass, maybe I'll take your job, huh, Kennedy?”

Leon’s jaw grew tight as he watched you sit down. You were growing overly cocky, and he was right. You were putting him on his ass, you did teach him everything he knows. The two of you sat silently, the air growing tense as Leon scribbled on some papers.

——-

The papers in your hands shook with your trembling body as your eyes had to read over them again.

“DENIED”

In bright red at the middle of the paper, your eyes scanned to the bottom of the page to see Leon’s signature line empty.

Where could you have gone wrong? You were even starting to be so sweet; you’d bring extra water for him every day in case he forgot his and even packed him a lunch once a week.

It’s only five; he doesn’t leave till eight. Even though the doors were locked up front, you knew you could find a way in.

A loud groan fell from your lips at the fall from the window, and your hands staggered to the ground as you stood up. You had to give him a piece of your mind, your arm still holding at your purse as you walked down the hall. Maybe you were crazy breaking into official government offices, but you could always get away with it by blaming Leon.

Coercion.

Your body pushed into his office, throwing the paperwork down onto the desk before turning around and quietly shutting and locking the door.

“Sign it.”

You pointed to the line. Leon stared at your finger before scoffing as he scribbled at the other paperwork before him.

Coercion.

“Sign the paperwork or… I’ll write a letter to your boss that the night you snuck into my house, you and I had sex. When you were supposed to be working.”

You stumbled over your words, your hands flipping at the paperwork in front of you.

Coercion.

Before you could even flip the next page Leon had stood, his hand wrapping tightly around your throat before slamming you into the wall. A loud whimper leaving your lips but was muffled by his much bigger hand covering your mouth.

“God you’re stupid, so fucking stupid..”

Leon lectured as he pressed his hand harder into your mouth and throat, your eyes fluttering as you felt your vision getting hazy.

Knock knock.

Leon’s grip remains on you as he turned his head to the door, his demeanor changing as he put a more professional toned voice on.

“Yeah?”

Heels clicked as the woman tried opening the door, it’s the girl from the front desk.

“Is everything okay? I heard a loud thud.”

Leon’s eyes fixed back on you, so pretty and scared against his hand.

“Everything is perfect. Just dropped some files. You can go.”

Leon listened to her heels walk down the hall way, his stare burning into you before he finally looked over at the paperwork on his desk.

“You want it signed? Work for it.”

Leon whispers in your ear as his much taller form draped over you, pushing you down to your knees.

#leon kennedy #resident evil #leon kennedy imagine #leon kennedy smut #leon kennedy x reader #resident evil x reader #re4 leon #re4 remake leon #resident evil smut

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biceratops7 · 11 months

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… let’s talk about “Arrival”

So I was fully intending on making a more general but thorough peruse through the new Good Omens title sequence, because my FUCK aren’t those always a gold mine. But then I thought to myself, “hey wait a minute, I can be even more unhinged and on brand.”

Something I’ve seen nobody talk about yet is that the movie that the procession is marching into is The Arrival, which is a 90’s movie that draws a pretty straightforward parallel. But I think if it doubles as a reference to 2016’s Arrival, THAT has some much more interesting implications. Either way this reference is doing some heavy lifting.

For those who haven’t seen the movie (or that one philosophy tube video about it lol), the basic plot is that a group of aliens later named heptopods arrive on earth scattered across the world, and just kind of invite humanity to check them out. Each country hires a team of linguists who are all tasked with figuring out what the visitors are here for. But the thing is, it’s only about aliens on the surface level. This is really about communicating, cooperation, and how language holds the power to alter your very fabric of reality.

Spoilers for the movie:

Two major revelations occur towards the end of the movie. The first is that an element of fluid time is revealed. Throughout the movie, the main American linguist has been having flashbacks to a daughter that passed away of an illness. But since the heptopod language has no regard for chronological order, we learn that these are actually flash-forwards when she becomes nearly fluent. In other words, learning heptopod, having a genuine curiosity and even compassion for these vastly different beings. has given her the ability to perceive reality in ways thought previously impossible.

Even before noticing the Arrival reference, I’ve been side eyeing these “flashbacks”, but this and the image above confirmed it for me. Any instance of the word “becoming” when talking about the past indicates some sort of fluid time nonsense. The past is fixed unless something ✨happens✨. I don’t think these are simply memories, I think something rather cosmic instead is afoot.

But it’s more than just “there’s probably time travel in this” though. Simply having Aziraphale as a companion has changed Crowley. It’s given him an ability that he’s not meant to be capable of as a demon. He already had it in him to be good and have mutual relationships based in trust and kindness, I’m sure all demons can if given the right nurture… but Crowley is experiencing love. In the show, something tangible to the senses and distinctly angelic. I’m very much hoping that that whole element of things is going to somehow be a driving factor in what’s occurring over all, and possibly involved in time going screwy.

The other element of Arrival’s ending that’s of import, is the heavy emphasis on the importance of cooperation. First of all, we learn at some point that not every country has the same message to decipher, they each have one piece of a whole. Some of the countries begin using games to communicate with their heptopods, and this poses a problem because it causes messages to be more easily interpreted as hostile. For example, the phrase “we brought a tool” can be easily misconstrued as “we have a weapon.” Eventually, the world gets impatient and scared, and a war is imminent. What finally leads to everyone putting down arms and cooperating, is the American linguist sending a message to the Chinese linguist saying “in war, there are no victors, only widows.”

Something noteworthy about this particular march is that the procession never splits like it does at the end of the first season’s. Not only are both angelic and demonic figures marching into the light atop a mountain as a United front, but this actually seems to be a theme this season. Heaven and Hell aren’t working together as far as we know, but they are at least working towards the same goal, which for some reason is getting Gabriel’s ass. There is also a heavy emphasis on mending broken relationships, with Crowley and Azirphale trying to fix a (probably) lesbian couple literally being the B plot.

Now this is where we bring in what’s actually on the movie screen, which is that damn box. So at this point we know basically nothing about it accept for it probably being a Mcguffin. But we DO have the imagery of three feathers, a black one, a white one, and a bluish grey one, falling into it… and it sure as fuck looks like a moving box. So back to arrival, what actually was the message? The heptopods told the linguist that they’re here to help humanity (via giving them a tool or new tech I think?) because in 3,000 years, they will need humanity’s help. So with this and the world eventually being inspired to stand down and share their pieces of the message, it’s this over arching theme of setting aside fear of the other and cooperating indefinitely for the benefit of the whole. The black feather, the white feather… and then something that is somehow both yet entirely unique.

I think… somehow, someway, this season may culminate in Heaven and Hell reconciling. Whether it be against a common enemy, for a shared goal, or in love, there seems to be many clues both symbolic and literal that show them learning to be one again. Learning to understand eachother’s language and see new ways of being neither before could fathom.

#by the way the last image (not the meme) are Aziraphale and Crowley circling eachother in a dance like pattern… like twin stars…#so close they may from a great distance appear as one…#good omens #season 2 #speculation #meta #analysis #ineffable husbands #Aziraphale #Crowley #arrival 2016 #season 2 title sequence #biceratops

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barrencelenny · 2 months

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I feel like fic recs tend to be things that are complete, so I thought I'd rec some things that haven't been updated in a while (>a year) or abandoned, but I still like to go back and reread

with links and comments under the cut <3

Poured Over Ice in an Old-Fashioned Glass by prepandemicwriting (bealeciphers) [2016-02-04, 28k]

-classic bartender!barry fic. they're both kinda disasters all around? hilarious

Run Away With Me by asexual-fandom-queen (2016-05-23, 14k]

-the only time asking someone to run away with you has ever worked lmao.

Painting the Roses Red by Solarcat [2016-07-01, 20k]

-Family of Rogues but there's a third snart sibling that Len's got to protect. Lucy Snart that only exists in this fic and my brain ily <3

I bet these memories follow you around by MissSugarPlum [2017-06-07,5k]

-Lisa and Barry in high school at the same time, Barry being tiny and full of rage, Lisa being reluctantly charmed, mwah. chef's kiss.

Bolt from the Blue by town_without_heart [2017-06-16, 170k]

-pre-canon meeting is always delicious to me. eobard being aware of it is the cherry on top (what a creeper)

The Good in You (the Bad in Me) by blue_wonderer [2017-08-02, 26k]

-I have a soft spot for fics where Barry and Lisa are friends what can I say. set pre-canon, and barry is a goddamn delight

Get Me Through The Night by Mentalrebel [2017-08-07, 11k]

-super interesting formatting. it's a lifeline au? I have no idea what that it, but it's fun

Ties and Barricades by yersifanel [2017-09-01, 10k]

-pre-canon meet-ugly where len kidnaps his soulmate as part of his getaway.

Realignment (time & company) by writerdragonfly [2018-02-13, 12k]

-me? rec a time travel fic? of course. time traveller's wife au. gives some really interesting backstory to Len's mother/family

Unexpected Development by nirejseki [2018-04-05, 20k]

-it's so funny it's practically a crack fic. calling the reverse flash Mr. Banana is an inspired choice

since I can remember I've been runnin' from you by youmakemesoangry [2019-01-26, 14k]

-barry getting haunted by post oculus len yes oh yes

Sticky Fingers by MoriartyMastermind [2019-03-05, 18k]

-barry stealing wallets as the flash is like objectively funny okay

Resonance by Moriavis [2019-06-16, 40k]

-looove a soulmate fic and this one is so unique. Barry and Len meet when Barry's still a child, and it ends before they meet as adults, so really it's mainly a Leonard snart character study

Ice and Lightning by vomitingwords [2020-03-26, 2k]

-potentially the only figure skating au for this ship?

Zero to Sixty by scrubmarine [2020-06-26, 25k]

-barry meeting len out of costume because he's running away from Iris is a hilarious set up, and he kind of deserves it

Just Friends by Thundersnow [2021-08-11, 168k]

-a classic fake dating au, trying to figure out how a blueberry coffee could taste good has been a question that has followed me for years.

Shiva by crestfaller [2021-11-07, 17k]

-I always need more fics dealing with the loss of Henry tbh, and this is a really good exploration of grief.

What It Might Cost by Kateera [2022-05-17, 20k]

-a classic deaging fic, len is heartbreakingly cute

Stand Still by Taste_of_Bitterness [2022-09-15, 25k]

-len doesn't go on the waverider after running to stand still. Barry's kind of a mess here, tbh?

I Think I Love You by youmakemesoangry [2023-05-03, 67k]

-it's post Len and mick's legends trip, and they're helping out team flash. there's a truth spell involved. It's a classic trope. (also there's this bit where mick's reading Frankenstein and he calls creature victor's kid, and that's such a mood, my gothic fiction class spent like an hour talking about his daddy issues once)

#might start a little collection of fic rec zines lol #k.txt #coldflash #fic recs

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sparrowrye · 1 month

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Demi Demon || Alastor x Reader, A2 part 24

Synopsis: It’s been over a year since we were brought under Alastor’s watchful eye. We’ve unlocked our Demonic powers, discovered our own talents, and began building the Safe Haven with Charlie and co. Alastor seems increasingly interested in the power we hold as one and intends to use it properly.

Previous part

Part 24: a relationship?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"I'm sorry, sir. We can't pinpoint him. My guess is he's mobile." Caloh Warlock stood with his hands respectfully behind his back in front of Alastor, who remained seated in one of the chairs by the fireplace. His legs were crossed, a thoughtful hand on his cheek, and his cane upright beside his leg. He tapped the metal cover, agitated.

"One can't be mobile if he requires a factory." His eyes narrowed on the owned soul. He knew it wasn't Caloh's fault that Blackwater was hard to find, but that didn't stop the growing anger and anxiety boiling in his chest.

Caloh was the type of Demon that had a strange inhuman appearance. His entire head was a motorcycle helmet with a single eye blinking through the visor. He met the Demon back in 2016 when he nearly died on the side of the road. Alastor had taken the opportunity to secure another soul deal. He offered to save the dying man's life in exchange for his soul for the rest of eternity. Once the Great Collapse happened, he left the man alone to do what he wanted, only calling upon his services after the incident with Blackwater.

Caloh had spent weeks trying to track down Blackwater. The man was too evasive, never staying in the spot people claimed he was in. His inventions were still being mass produced, somehow, as if one of his major factories hadn't been swallowed into the earth. He didn't necessarily mind being brought under Alastor after so long, but he did mind the anger and condescending nature his master casted in his direction during every interaction.

He was abruptly pulled down to his knees, hands slamming into the wood floor as Alastor stood from the chair. Caloh leaned back on his heels as Alastor approached, refusing to stop until the tip of his boot hit the soul's knees. He slowly bent at the waist so his red eyes could bore into Caloh's single one.

"I don't want you to ask or find him," Alastor's teeth snapped dangerously close to his face, "I want you to hunt him down. I want to look through your eyes and see a man screaming and begging for his life until he gives you Blackwater's exact location." He paused, eyes searching Caloh's worried one through the helmet. "Prove your usefulness to me." He let Caloh hear the cries and screams of souls who no longer had their body, of souls who were damned for eternity until Alastor, himself, passed onto whatever was next for him.

"Of course...sir."

Alastor snapped back up with a wide grin. "Excellent! I expect to hear from you soon, then." He stepped back without looking and settled down in the chair again, antlers shrinking to their normal size.

Caloh swallowed despite his dry throat and slowly got to his feet. He gave a bow of his covered head before leaving the dark, ancient house. Alastor turned the radio back on to a quiet, somewhat lively tune and lost himself in his thoughts. His contacts were frequently updating him on Blackwater's movements or anything related to the man.

Blackwater seemed like a ghost, never fully there but never fully gone. His factories were being destroyed by other Overlords and yet his inventions were still streaming out to the public. He was becoming a big name and, according to Charlie, Lucifer was still dealing with more and more Demons coming into Hell. He tried to send them over to the haven but those who didn't live in the unclaimed territory were happy in their secured portion of Hell.

His darling was also being plagued by the man. Every time their minds melted together, he would get a brief memory of the man and the fear that was associated with it. It didn't help that you were always asking him, at least once every day, if he had found him yet. You always looked so deflated and worried when he said he hadn't.

"I need to rid this man," he growled aloud, abruptly standing up and moving into the library. He begun pacing around the cold room. He wanted more than anything to wrench the man's soul out of his body and stretch it across his radio frequencies. The pain and fear would taste wonderfully and maybe even his love would enjoy it. He wished dearly to see you come into your full Demon nature. You had so much potential, so much power, but your caring nature and traumatic past were preventing you. He remembered the struggle of unwrapping your curse when you first met four years ago.

His ear twitched when the front door open. He instantly recognized Reagan's voice as she called his darling's name. He took a few steps forward to look into the living room where Reagan stood. Her eyes locked on him and her body frozen.

"I'm afraid she's out at the moment," he told her, his smile feeling strained and fake in front of the teenager.

"Doing what?" She sounded skeptical. She always did around him. She had become an annoying thorn in his side, much like how her adoptive mother had been with him years ago.

"She is having tea with a friend of ours in Hell," he replied.

"I'll come back later, then." She went to the door but he spoke before she turned the handle.

"Perhaps you'd like to wait here. I suspect she'll return soon."

"And stay with you?"

His smile turned into a slight snarl. He couldn't understand how his darling and this teenager became so close. He couldn't understand why you even wanted to spend any time with such young folk. They were infuriating. It wasn't just his own preference, as he noticed. Many other adults in the haven didn't particularly like teenagers.

"She doesn't mind my company much." He pinched his claws together and examined them, sending a sideways glance in her direction.

"She should."

The nerve of this child.

"Why do you say that?" He moved swiftly into the living room and sat himself back in the seat by the fireplace. "You shouldn't judge someone by the rumors and tales spun by others."

Oh the irony of his very own words. It was thanks to the rumors and tales of others that his name became so feared so quickly in both realms.

"I'm not. I'm judging you from what she's told me." She let go of the handle and crossed her arms, facing him completely. While the two women weren't biologically related, he could see such resemblance. It was almost painful.

"And what has she told you?" His smile was a sneer in an effort to unset the young woman. He rested his cane on the arm rest and leaned his cheek into his clawed hand. He wanted to look relaxed and unbothered despite the burning questions in the back of his mind. How much and what exactly had the two of you been talking about in relation to him?

"Wouldn't you like to know," she growled.

"That is why I'm asking."

She rolled her eyes and finally opened the front door. "Ask her yourself."

"She cares for you," he said louder, catching her attention before she left. "You do not like me, that much is obvious, but I wish to...make amends? With you. I know it would bring her great joy to see us in each other's company."

Reagan thought for a long moment, eyes darting around and hand still on the door handle. After another moment of silence, she let out a strained sigh and closed the front door. Step one complete. Now, step two.

"Perhaps you can tell me why I bother you so?" He motioned to the chair across from him that you usually sat in. Reagan's eyes were like a snake's eyes, never leaving him as she sat down in the seat as rigid as ever.

"Well, you're the Radio Demon. What's there to even like?"

He chuckled at that. "It is a persona. One that keeps others from coming too close." He meant that physically and personally. "You are seeing the individual, now."

"I don't like the individual either. You terrorized my mo--you hurt her too."

He caught that phrase. My mother. Your relationship was significantly closer than he realized.

"According to dear Charlie, redemption is possible for everyone. I have been making steps to do just that."

"Like what? You're always touching her and I know you get more power when you do that."

Just how much had you revealed to this child? Why would you tell Reagan about the powers of the bond yet fail to tell her the actions he's taken to grow close with you? Were you embarrassed about the romantics? You were embarrassed for not knowing how to dance so surely that made sense, too. It made him feel better knowing that not everything was being shared with the teenager.

"A relationship is a complicated, thing," he started.

"Is that what it is?"

His one ear irked sideways. "Sounds as though you may need to ask her again how she feels about me. We have grown close despite the difficulties we both present."

"Sounds like stockholm syndrome."

A breath of silence. "How do you know what that means?"

"I'm eighteen."

"That explains nothing."

"I overheard someone say it and looked it up."

"You don't have a device to do such a thing."

"I asked Charlie for her phone."

Of course. He needed to talk to dear Charlie about that.

"Since the construction of the haven began, she has had an immense amount of freedom and has chosen to stay with me." He folded his claws in his lap and held them painfully tight. "She could have stayed with anyone in the haven, still can," he insisted, "but she chooses to remain up here with me."

He felt you touch his mind through the bond. He reached out and teleported you back to the cliffside.

"You're the Radio Demon. You can manipulate anyone."

He stood up and fixed his bow tie, grabbing his cane as he did so. "Perhaps you will come to see that I don't wish to manipulate everyone I come across. For now, you ought to speak with her more often about our relationship." He looked to the kitchen door before you walked in.

You greeted him with a smile, turning his own more genuine. He extended his hand and felt the warmth of your palm when you took it. He had planned to give you a kiss as a greeting but you noticed Reagan before he could. Instead, he resorted to a kiss on the top of your head by your lovely horns. He forced himself not to look at Reagan so as not to give in to her suspects.

The two of you talked briefly, agreeing to eat dinner together tomorrow evening. Reagan casted an unamused look in his direction before leaving the house. He let out a heavy sigh as soon as the door shut.

"What on earth happened?" you asked, "You two never talk."

"I had attempted common ground. She wasn't...overly receptive," he told you.

"Oh. I'm sorry."

He bent down and finally stole a soft kiss. You laughed as you pulled away, letting him wrap an arm around your back. You were always so warm and folded perfectly into his side. He half listened as you talked about your conversation with Rosie, allowing him to lead you up the stairs to the shared room.

Since the two of you had grown close, you had a habit of pacing when you were in deep thought, your tail whisking behind you gracefully and your claws tapping on the wood and rug. You were the only one who he could listen to for hours.

He watched you go on about more ideas for the haven that Rosie had sparked in that mind of yours as he undid his bow tie and shed his red coat. He smiled over his shoulder when your words slowed. That particular movement of his never failed to make you falter, especially now that you had discovered his wretched tail.

He sat on the window seat with one leg up and his arm draping across it. You were quick to finish your train of thought, hands clasped firmly together in nervousness, and went silent in an effort to make him speak. For a few moments he watched you struggle, toe claws tapping the floor and tail swishing across the rug.

Finally, he relented and held out his hand for you to take. You walked over and let him pull you down with your back against his chest. He loved feeling your warmth and magic seep into his lungs. It felt like you were giving him more life. He wrapped his arms around your torso and smiled at the feeling of your hands gently hanging onto him. You shrank your horns so as not to hurt him and he planted a kiss on the top of your head as a thank you. He then rubbed his cheek against your smooth, soft hair.

"What's wrong?" you asked.

So perceptive. When had you gotten so good at reading him?

"I have been quite...forceful, haven't I?" he asked slowly, afraid to hear the answer.

"What do you mean?"

"I have...I want to allow you the ability to choose. I do not wish to take control of our...relationship." He worried you might react the same way to that word as Reagan had.

There was a spike of mixed nervousness and excitement from you. He let you touch his mind but he didn't want you to see his memory of the conversation with the teenager. You pressed further against him and tilted your head back so your closed eyes could lean against his neck. He noted a rabbit trail thought of yours. You liked when he was sitting because it lessened the height gap between you two. After all, he was mostly just legs.

"We might've had a rough start but...I do want to be close with you." You moved a hand to gently rest on top of one of his black claws.

"You are allowed to feel otherwise," he insisted.

"Thank you," you mimicked him, rubbing your face into his neck and sending more warmth through his body, "but I'd like to."

His eyes looked over your figure. Just over a year ago he would've hissed at your touch. A year ago he would've laughed at Rosie's statement of love. Only two years ago you had been at each other's throat and causing all kinds of headaches for him.

After centuries of being alone, of meeting shallow women, you had snaked your way under his skin and into his heart. How had he even let this happen? How had he even gotten to this point? He was the Radio Demon. Yet here he was trying to convince you, and himself, that you had a choice to be close with him.

How have I fallen so hard for you?

Your ear perked up and pulled your face away. "What did you just say?"

"I didn't."

You tilted your head back so your eyes could meet, both pairs jumping between each other, each trying to decipher what had just happened.

Surely you cannot hear me.

"That!" You made a slight jump in his arms. His one ear fell to the side.

This isn't real. He heard your voice without your mouth moving.

It appears it may very well be real, he answered through his own thoughts.

"Whoah..." you said aloud.

"Our bond has grown stronger." He felt the doubts in the back of his head disappear at the realization, but there seemed to be some bubbling in your own.

"I didn't think...can soulmates do that?"

"Some," he nodded his head. He searched your face and mind for fear, for resentment, for disappointment. Over a year ago you had been determined to keep him from sharing such a connection with you. Did you still feel that way? Doubts were one thing but what would happen if they solidified?

He felt your nervousness, though he didn't ever not feel that from you, but he wondered if it was because you worried what he would hear. What was there to be afraid of? He had already seen all your memories since the start of everything. Were you worried he was manipulating you? That had been a point you had stressed so many times when everything started.

Then he felt it. You wrapped your mind around his. He felt you search through some of his wide array of memories and through his feelings. He tried to push you out, surprised and angry at such an act, but for the first time ever he couldn't. He felt your presence pushing against him and drawing deep feelings from his chest.

He sucked in cool air when you finally pulled out of his mind. His ears pinned back against his head as he opened his mouth to scold you. Instead, you twisted your body and came up on your knees to connect your lips with his, a single clawed hand pressed just beneath his neck on his collarbone. You were pushing him hard into the wall.

He reached up and pulled on one of your horns to break the kiss, smile strained. "Darling why did you search--"

"I like you," you interrupted. He fell silent. His ears went back up. "I haven't ever been...close or in a relationship with anyone before you, but...we're soulmates for a reason, right?"

You pulled him into your mind and let him look through your memories, watching the conversation with Rosie only an hour before. They had talked about him. In depth. His anger melted away as quickly as it had arrived.

You're not manipulating me right? Your thought echoed in his head.

No, my darling.

Based on your reaction, he guessed you hadn't meant for that train of thought to reach him. He wondered about the limitations this new power and skill held, but that would come later.

He brushed the back of his fingers across your cheek like he always did. Now he understood why you had so blatantly went through his mind. You were searching for his true thoughts and feelings. You were trying to make sure he was being honest. Quite frankly, nowadays, he wasn't sure how to be dishonest with you.

I am infatuated with you. Enamored. Smitten. Dare I say recklessly in love with you.

In love? You sat back on your ankles, tail wrapping around your waist, so you could face him completely. He still had one leg up on the seat and the other over the edge.

"Yes my dear," he said aloud, "in love. I don't do shallow things. Much too trifling." He waved the word off with his hand, earning a small quirk of a smile on your lips. He wanted to kiss you again. "Would you consider yourself in love?"

"I uh...I suppose?"

"Why is it a question?" He rested his arm on his bent knee and noticed your pupils widen.

Ah. So that's what was happening.

He tried blending with your mind again but you were keeping him in the midst between shallow and deep waters. You were trying to hide it. Your mind was in two vastly different places at once. He wanted to exploit that further.

"I just...I've read the novels about love but I hear the teenagers and friends talk about liking someone first. I'm not sure what the difference is."

His smile turned into a grin. He reached out with his other hand to gently rest your chin on his red claw. "One is fleeting, one is deep. The latter is a commitment." He paused, eyes scanning your body for more hints. You were good at hiding it in that way but your eyes and guarded mind were telling more. "One elicits small gestures. The other...well..." His own heart was punching the inside of his chest. "Well, the other is a bit different."

His hand moved from your chin to the back of your neck, pulling you in for a kiss. He wrapped his arm around your back to pull you flush against him, hands on his chest and grabbing at the red button up. He loved the feeling of your hands on his chest and he wished right there that you had the confidence to undo one of those black buttons.

Though he settled for the glorious way you shifted your body so you could lean into his arm and tilt your head to deepen the kiss. Finally you opened your mind to him and he searched. You had the same burning sensation in your chest as he did and your hands were sweaty from nervousness. He could practically hear the things you wanted to do.

He had never felt the urges others had to be sweaty and physically intimate with each other. He very well understood the reasoning but never felt the desire himself. Now, his mind was beginning to wander, exploring the new topic.

His hands began to explore, too, moving down your back to settle on your hips then up your sides. Surely your skin there was just as soft and smooth as the skin on your cheeks. What would happen if you two went all the way? Could he even lead properly? He didn't believe he was experienced or at least knowledgable enough about it to do anything like it.

But he was just oh so curious. His thumbs found the edge of your shirt and slipped underneath to feel that soft skin.

Your eyes snapped open and you shoved away, knocking his head painfully hard against the wood. He let out a hiss as you scrambled back, wings sprouting from your back to wrap around your body. His smile faltered in the only way it could, the corners flatlining and his eyebrows furrowing in confusion. His hand remained frozen in an outreach, unsure of what had just happened.

He gently brushed against your mind but you had blocked him out completely. It left him feeling aggressively cold and he had to increase his body temperature to keep himself from shivering. His chest pinched tightly as you refused to open your mind to him again.

"I overstepped." It was both a question and a statement.

"I don't...know." You were still wrapped in your wings and...were you shaking? Yes, you were definitely shaking. Your face was a tell tale sign enough. He could taste the edges of fear that still lingered from your previous contact.

"I didn't mean to scare you." He put both legs over the edge of the seat, eyes never leaving you. He noticed that you were refusing to look him in the eyes. You were watching him carefully, fearfully, like you had four years ago when he first brought you to the house.

"It wasn't...on purpose. I'm sorry."

"What are you apologizing for?" He tilted his head to the side, finally getting eye contact for a quick glance.

"For...reacting like that." You stared at the closed curtains, eyes picking something and sticking to it. He wasn't sure how to fix what had just happened. He didn't even know why it had happened. Everything seemed fine up until that last second.

"It is getting late, my darling." He tried changing the subject, trying to move on. "Perhaps it is time for our routine?" He snapped his fingers to make the usual items reveal themselves on the bed, your novel and his abstracts. You dared a glance at what he had done with his magic and he felt your guard thinning. "Why don't you get dressed? You may be feeling restless from overworking yourself."

You nodded, slowly unraveling yourself and leaving the room to change into your nightly outfit. He feared you would not return, stretching his mind out and wrapping around yours at a wide distance. He was trying to be welcoming, inviting, and just hoping that you would return to his room to spend the night with him again.

To his great relief, you did.

There was a heavy silence between you two for a long time. He tried to focus on writing his abstracts but failed miserably. He just wanted to know why you had reacted the way you did. Was it something he had done? He could taste a memory on the tip of his tongue but you had pulled away too soon for him to get the full extent of it. Had he triggered a bad memory?

Then it clicked.

When you first unraveled your curse, you had gone through a wretched memory. You had been attacked in one of your cages when you were a teenager. He remembered trying to convince you to kill the man who had ruined you but you had still been so skeptical of him at the time. Had ending the man's life not been enough to overcome such a memory? Obviously not.

His ears fell and his smile pinched into his check. He hadn't meant to trigger that memory or overstep a boundary. He hadn't meant to elicit such a fear from his own actions on you. You were a puzzle piece, for sure, with lots more work to be done. Guilt gnawed at his throat and he wished for a way to make you feel better, to apologize. He wasn't very good at those.

You noticed his ears and the stillness of his pen. "I'm sorry."

"What for, my dear?" He waited a moment before slowly turning his head to look. He didn't want to make any sudden movements.

"For reacting like that."

"You have already apologized for that, darling."

"Right." You went back to your novel.

He inwardly groaned. He was very bad at this.

"I suppose an apology from me is in order," he tried, removing his glasses, "I hadn't meant to scare you in such a way."

Finally, finally, he felt your guard fall completely. He slowly pressed his mind closer to yours until you metaphorically hooked a single claw on his mind. Apologies worked. Of course they did. The one thing he hated doing.

"Thank you." You moved over to rest your head on his shoulder. He shifted lower on the bed so it was more comfortable for you and placed a gentle kiss on your hair. You let out a wide yawn and he chuckled, drawing the book from your tired hands and dimming the lights and fireplace.

"I believe it is time for you to sleep," he mused kindly.

"What gave it away?" you teased with yet another yawn.

He laid down first and was surprised when you attached yourself to his side. Your tail wrapped around his leg and draped your arm over his chest. He planted another kiss on your forehead this time before you managed to snuggle your face into the crook of his neck. His own anxieties went out the window as your minds melted together perfectly.

His claws moved methodically along your back until he couldn't fight off the sleep either.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Author's Note:

Alastor perspective! New OC - Caloh Warlock!

Happy Easter <3

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Taglist:

@wendigonamecaller @saccharine-nectarine @thesimpybitch @papas-ghoulette

#demi demon #alastor the radio demon #alastor x reader #hazbin alastor #hazbin hotel #soulmate au #soulmates #reqs open

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astranva · 2 years

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Planet Evans Universe Masterlist

Following the life of overprotective!dad!Chris x wife!actress!reader!

Disclaimer: You can get to enjoy the one shots/blurbs as stand-alones without knowing the background of the universe but for a full experience, check out the tag! Happy reading. x

Planet Evans Universe Tag

Planet Evans Timeline | pe!reader’s Wikipedia Page | pe!reader's Dating History | Social Media tag | Blurbs tag

One Shots

2014

How We Met - In which Chris was a nervous mess when he met his A+ list celebrity crush, highest-paid, and the most iconic actress, you, at Vanity Fair’s 2014 after party.

2015

Go on a Date With Me - How Chris asked you out on a date.

First Kiss - Teasing led to your first kiss.

Chris' Birthday - First birthday to celebrate together.

2016

Anxious - Chris didn't know that getting drunk would trigger you.

Scared - Seeing you with your co-star, Andrew Garfield, didn’t just make Chris jealous. it made him scared.

2017

Pregnancy Scare - The one where your period was late.

Graduation - Chris talks about attending pe!reader's graduation on Jimmy Kimmel's.

2018

Get Out of Here - Security didn't believe Chris was your fiance when visiting you on set.

2019

Cheating Rumors - Things looked bad during the Knives Out press tour for Chris.

2020

Glambot - pe!reader and Chris pose for the Oscars' glambot.

Buzzcut - Chris posts a video on Instagram of pe!reader giving him a buzzcut during quarantine.

2021

Getting Ready with Vogue - Vogue posts Chris and y/n y/l/n-evans getting ready for 2021 Oscars.

Actors on Actors - Married and in love, you and Chris do Variety’s Actors on Actors interview together.

2022

Celebrities fangirling over y/n y/l/n for 18 minutes straight - Being one of the most globally famous, a-list actresses meant that you were always the talk of other celebrities and shows, and a fan compiles some of these times in one YouTube video.

Your Comfort - Chris can’t help but feel overprotective over his pregnant wife.

Coffee and Bagel - Pregnant, you and Chris get swarmed by paps and Chris loses his shit when you almost trip.

Bagel Secured - Chris would do anything to get you your bagel.

Loving on Live - A few months before River’s birth, you and Chris went live on Instagram as you cooked, reminiscing some memories and making the world freak out over watching their favorite couple.

Sexiest Man Alive - In which Chris is 2022’s Sexiest Man Alive, he can’t stop talking about you and your son, and you already know.

Oprah Winfrey Interview - As one of the most famous actresses in the world, fans watch your tell-all interview with Oprah Winfrey which Chris joins.

TikTok - A fan posts a TikTok edit of pe!reader and Chris.

The Kids as Babies

River - In which you gave birth and Chris is an emotional mess.

Clingy - In which your baby, River, is clingy to you and Chris is upset.

The Kids as Toddlers

Christmas Bliss - With 4 kids, Christmas is emotional and everything but boring.

Blurbs

Overprotective - pe!reader talks about overprotective!Chris in a Jimmy Fallon interview.

The Grey Man Premiere - Pregnant pe!reader attends The Gray Man premiere.

Morning Baby Bump Cuddles - Dodger likes to cuddle pe!reader’s bump every morning.

Hormones - Chris is understanding to pe!reader’s (lonely) hormones.

Wedding Ring - pe!reader feels a little off about Chris not wearing his wedding ring (early marriage period).

Magic Number - pe!reader has been with less people than Chris and he wishes he'd waited.

FaceTime - After tiring press interviews, Chris can't help but sleep during his and pe!reader's facetime and feels bad about it.

Cast Was Great - pe!reader gets asked about her thoughts on The Gray Man in an online interview.

Always Right - When chris gets insecure about pe!reader liking Henry Cavill's mustache.

My Mind & Me - pe!reader in Selena Gomez's documentary.

Do You Love Me? - pe!reader asks Chris if he loves her but he doesn't give her the answer she wants.

Stuck - Chris feels bad about being known for Captain America only and pe!reader assures him.

chris's gifs with dodger. that's the blurb.

Confession - pe!reader admits she didn't know Chris' name when she first met him.

Teenage Crush - James McAvoy finds out that pe!reader had a crush on him when filming atonement for the first time.

Triggered - pe!reader gets triggered by Chris' drinking early on in the relationship.

Full Course Meal - pe!reader knows how to make Chris' bad day better.

Leaked - Chris leaks pictures of himself and pe!reader.

Amy Dune - pe!reader gets asked about Amy Dune as a role model at a press junket.

Shots - River gets his shots a 3 months.

Avatar 2's Dolphin Show - Articles about pe!reader being upset over her movie's press involving animal cruelty.

Rules - Just pe!reader and Chris being flirty on their yacht.

Date Night - pe!reader and Chris have a date night after River is asleep and Chris goes down on his knees for her.

Other Plans - Seeing pe!reader dressed up makes Chris go feral enough to cancel her plans himself.

Cop 'Stache - pe!reader reacts to Chris' 2018 mustache and haircut.

Dior - Dior names a bag after pe!reader.

Butterfly - Chris says why he thinks pe!reader's spirit animal is a butterfly on Jimmy Fallon's.

One and Only - Adele talking about pe!reader at her concert.

Time - pe!reader being flirty with Chris.

Necklace - Chris gets pe!reader a butterfly necklace.

Family Gossip - The family of 6 like a good gossiping session in the kitchen.

Gossip Circle - The men in the family feel left out of pe!reader and B's gossip circle.

That Look - Chris gets confident and cocky when he's jealous.

Jealous - A jealous pe!reader makes an appearance.

Tattoos - People magazine write about Chris' tattoos.

Tiny Mic - pe!reader and Chris react to a tiny mic on the red carpet.

#chris evans imagine #planet evans universe #planet evans #chris evans x reader #chris evans fluff imagine #chris evans fluff one shot #chris evans one shot

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meowzilla93 · 3 months

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Possessive Baxter has potentially consumed all my brain cells, and the last two have been doing their best rubbing against each other and created the following little NSFW fic

Please, enjoy!

Baxter holds many regrets over his life, the largest and most impactful one being when he walked away from you in that summer of 2016. When he made the choice for you, that you would never want to stay with him, that he was not worthy of any of the kindness and love that you wanted to give him. After all, he knew best that he was unlovable and that to expect that was a dream that could never exist.

Yet, somehow by fates design, your paths crossed again and he was given the chance to hold onto you. The chance to grasp the life he wanted with you, even after all that he did to push you away, he was given the chance to finally be happy; And by some miracle, you wanted him too. He knew he had so much to make up for, so much to apologise for, and he wanted to start that by making sure you knew just how much you meant to him. That he was willing to show you how much he missed you and would never allow you to feel so lonely ever again.

However, there was an insidious little voice in the back of his mind that he couldn’t shake. A voice that reminded him that whilst he was gone, there where others who got to know you; Got to laugh with you, spend time with you, hold you. The more he tried to ignore it the more it ate at him, that he wasted five years of not being able to have all those experiences with you, knowing that someone else got to instead and he simply had to accept it.

This was going to be the hardest trial Baxter would need to go through, and as he held you in his arms, leaving bruising kisses across your bare shoulders, he knew that he needed to accept that his hands are not the first to hold you this intimately. What infuriated him though, what he couldn’t move past, is that others held you this way, in the exact he couldn’t these last five years. He caused this, he knew this, and yet the thoughts wouldn’t leave him.

As his lips find his way down your chest and he captures your nipple with his teeth, he listens to you moan and he wonders if the others you were with appreciated the beauty of your voice, the pure pleasure that it brought him and all he did was merely tease you. Did they appreciate how your nipples pearled as their breath barely ghosted over them, how soft your skin felt as they traced your spine, following the shivers that took over your body?

No. He doesn’t believe for a moment that they knew what they got to have, who they held and the beauty of what you could offer them, like you offered him now. As his hands trace your hips and thighs, your lips captured with his, he was going to make sure to show how much he missed you, how thankful he was that you were there, and to erase the memories of anyone else over those last five years.

So, slowly but surely, as his hands explored your crevices and curves, tracing the softness and hardness of your contours, his touch became firmer and deliberate with each pass. He took note what pleased you most, the reaction of your body and made sure to focus his attention on those areas, as your eyes fluttered closed and you clutched at him wanting more, panting his name into the night air.

He could swear that your body felt like pure fire, so hot to the touch and yet so beautiful that he didn’t want to turn away from you, didn’t want to stop searing the sensation of your skin into his mind. With arms wrapped around your back, placing his hands just at your shoulders, he gripped and dragged his blunt nails down your back, causing you to arch against him, as you gripped his hair, trying to ground yourself into the present.

With careful, calculated moves, he was joined with you, and if he were a lesser man he would’ve lost himself there and then. But he owed you more than that. Owed you a night of pure pleasure and passion, and he was going to make sure you felt exactly that. Bringing a hand down between you, he made sure to stoke the heat within you, bringing you to your peak as he moved within you. Filling you as he brought you closer and closer to your climax, his other hand found your neck and he tangled his hand into your hair, pulling you in for a deep, desperate, passionate kiss.

He couldn’t tell if it was you or him that was moaning anymore, both your moans and voices filling the air, all he knew was that it was him making you feel that way. It was him that you were gripping onto dear life as you found your way through your climax as he continued his ministrations to your body, making sure you felt each part of your orgasm as he found his way there too, not stopping until you were collapsing against him.

He knew that it would take more than one intimate moment to erase the memories of those before him. As he held onto you and looked deep into your beautiful, caring eyes, he knew he would spend the rest of his life removing any mark of anyone else from your memories, and engraving the memory of his touch into your mind. So that there may come a day that you do not remember any other lover but him. That was his promise that he silently made to you.

#baxter ward #our life beginnings and always #olba #our life #olba baxter #baxter x mc #our life baxter #meow fic!

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sunbloomdew · 10 months

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Love Confessions in the Baxter DLC

Because i am very unwell, thank you. Part 1/3

After over 70 hours of playing the Baxter DLC – and despairing over that one monochrome guy, you know who – I wanted to take a moment to talk about all the possible love confessions in Baxter's version of Step 4. I find them all lovely and each of them made me squeal and smile like crazy, and i just gotta express my appreciation for them somewhere.

In Step 4 there are three love confessions. Two of them can be initiated by the MC, and the third one will be proclaimed by Baxter, if the MC doesn’t confess first. I tried all of them a couple of times, and they are all very cute (although my personal favourite is the confession the morning after the wedding)!

Before we begin i want to warn y’all that i wasn’t sure about the approach i wanted to take when talking about these moments, and as a result this post might not be a "put together careful game analysis" thingy. It's mostly just my ramblings and feelings that hopefully are a-okay to read haha. Without further delay, let’s begin!

Spoilers for specific moments in Baxter's version of Step 4!

All of the confessions take place after the wedding ceremony, so if you hadn't gotten there and don't wanna spoil those great moments for yourself i don't recommend reading further. I will go quite in depth about each option.

In chronological order, the first feelings declaration is the confession immediately after the wedding has ended.

Or as i've been referring to it in my head, The Wedding Confession!

Everybody is busy cleaning up, and MC hasn’t had a chance to have a one-on-one moment with Baxter since they split off in the morning. Naturally, they want to talk with him after the event is over. There is this underlying fear, that Baxter will leave again and they can't let that happen.

The two talk and Baxter apologises for his actions towards MC, five years ago in Sunset Bird and now, after they met again. I need to add that this apology is very well written and it definitively pulled on my heartstrings. Here the player can choose to confess on their own, accept his friendship hoping for a different type of relationship later on or just become friends.

Since i’m yet to play Baxter’s version of Step 4 with platonic feelings, i don’t know if this option appears if you have him at Fond. If anyone of you has done it, i would love to hear what it looks like! For example, does the player get to confess either way, in case they changed their mind (just how here you can choose to be friends)?

Moving further, if we choose to confess right away we get to pick how we want to do that - with words or by kissing him. Each choice will be preceded with an internal monologue from MC about their and Baxter’s relationship and what he means to them. I really like the way it's written. They go through all of the stages they've been around each other. If you met him at the Cypress in Step 2 Soiree Moment they mention how he was a boy in their memories, becoming real when they meet again by chance during summer of 2016. How he made this summer into everything and more and how he left. The years apart and finally the summer they reunited. I can't explain my feelings well, but i find this monologue very sweet but also full of longing - it makes me smile and it makes my heart ache at the same time.

Depending on when the MC confesses, Baxter has a different reaction to their silence. Since now he is waiting for them to accept him into their life again, he gets nervous the longer MC is lost in their thoughts, which is reflected in the expressions of his character model. It’s described as cracks of anxiety appearing on his face and him slipping back into his professional pleasantness. He chose to be vulnerable, and how MC replies will affect him.

After the character’s musings end the player gets one last chance to reaffirm the decision to confess.

Personally, I really like that we have the option to do so. Not only is it useful in case the player suddenly changed their mind, but also helps create the response you want from your MC.

If you back out then you no longer can confess in that moment. The story progresses the same as in the case of choosing not to confess. You can confess later in the game, or not confess at all and have Baxter do that.

If you pick the option to check if he means it, Baxter will reassure MC about wanting to stay by their side. It’s really adorable - especially since in response to MC he says “I do” (ya know, the famous wedding catchphrase) which he immediately follows up with: “You’ll have to excuse me for using that answer at someone else’s wedding, but I am entirely serious.” What a dork. After picking this option only two of the three are left - you can go further or back out.

And finally, you can confess. MC makes note of how now that the wedding was over, there would be no complications for the newlyweds (although they thought Miranda proposing to Terry at their wedding would be a great idea, so they really wouldn't mind lol). They think that since Baxter asked them out first, five years ago, it’s only fair that they do it now. It's one line, but for some reason i like this sentiment a lot. Like hell yeah, go MC! Ask him out now, make him speechless!

When it comes to spoken confessions, there is an abundance of choices to pick from. But my absolute favourite option is to echo Baxter’s own words from Step 3 Sightseeing Moment back at him: "Could I consider all the time we've spent together a date?". Chef’s kiss, it’s all coming together like a beautiful piece of tapestry. Simply iconic of them.

Confessing with a gesture has less options to choose from, but all are equally cute! If you choose to confess in this way, MC will have a short revelation about how different kissing Baxter now feels to kissing him five years ago. Baxter reacts a bit differently to this type of confession, since MC enters his personal space. My favourite is confessing by kissing Baxter on the forehead. It's absolutely precious.

The way Baxter reacts to MC confessing to him is… very interesting to say the least. He was ready to be friends them again or accept their rejection (there is no option like that in the game, but realistically, you just know he would prep himself up for this possibility) but he was not ready for a love confession. Baxter gives MC a moment to move past this and pretend that nothing happened, but it’s not going to work. I find that a curious thing to do. Baxter isn't hoping that MC doesn't have feelings for him and he himself does for them, but there is still that feeling of insecurity in him, that prevents him from accepting the confession right away.

We have the option to have MC sweep Baxter into a dance, or keep talking without that. I love the former choice and i always pick it for my character haha. It’s especially cute how Baxter stumbles and is so out of his depth. Both because of the unexpected movement and the sudden confession.

You can pick an option to tell him, that MC wanted to be with him even five years ago. His reaction to it is just. He is stunned and he doesn't believe it. But he knows MC isn't lying as well. I can feel the conflicted emotions he must have been experiencing upon hearing that just in one line of dialogue. And i think that's pretty powerful writing.

But then he fires back. He is full of disbelief and he doesn’t understand what could he have possibly done to deserve MC's affections. He doesn’t want to call MC a liar but he can’t accept that outcome either. Baxter’s old ways of dealing with relationships are resurfacing, because he can’t believe that he has the right to form such a deep connection with someone. It’s pretty heartbreaking to witness.

It's... so sad. "What did i do to make you like me?" he asks, because there must be something, because simply being himself is not enough, when Baxter inherently believes that he doesn't contribute anything. And if he doesn't contribute anything to somebody's life, he has no place in it.

MC decides to change tactics. Instead of trying to make Baxter accept their feelings, they ask what they mean to him. Whether they end up together is secondary - their goal is to help him overcome his mindset. I find that a really powerful act of love - helping the person you care about understand that they deserve to be loved without extravagant outings and carefully constructed barriers.

I really love Baxter’s response in this confession because it is very true to his character arc. His hesitance, how he withdraws and tries to appear unaffected. He reciprocates MC’s feelings, but he is too ashamed of himself and afraid. His view on himself makes him think that he can't be in a relationship with someone or friends with them, and that is something i find deeply sad. Still, he answers MC’s questions, with a few prefaces. He cites his inability to do things in the morning, less financial income and his past relationship management as reasons for why MC wouldn’t want to be with him. It’s him giving MC the chance to resign, to take back the love confession while they can. It reminds me of declining a meeting with your friends, because you believe that they will have more fun without you. It's self-preservation of your own feelings and diminishment of your impact on others, which comes from some form of dissatisfaction with the way we are.

But MC doesn't take their feelings back. They assure him that they want to be with him.

And once that is done, they ask him:

(I usually can comment on writing/art, but when i can't that's how you know it's the shit. i sat with my mouth open and my hands flapping around just cause this confession got me that excited <3)

This is the dialogue you get when you have Baxter on Crush. If you pick Love, instead of "I want to be with you" he will say "I'm in love with you".

Just like that, he accepts. I was totally shocked when that happened, but well, it does make sense. It was never a question, and Baxter admits so himself. He never stopped wanting to be with MC. He further expresses that he wasn't happy pushing them away five years ago and when they met again. It's quite sad to hear him admit that he didn't think staying together (in more than a romantic way) was an option until moments ago. But he got there ultimately and that's worth celebrating. Growth isn't linear, and sometimes we fall back to our old habits.

I really adore how openly Baxter expresses his affection for the MC, in the confession and later. Compared to Step 3 it feels more mature (no shit, sherlock) but also self-assured. Because he is finally starting to believe, that this - a relationship with a person who really knows him and chooses to stay - is something he can have.

These two lines of dialogue? Murdered me in my sleep with love and care. Sir, how dare you do that to me.

After that the two sillies finish their dance. Their story has a happy ending, they have been reunited. I adore how warm and happy this situation feels, and the descriptions make it feel so light and cheerful, like the moment with MC failing to catch their breath because they are laughing gleefully or Baxter holding them in a gentle embrace.

I really like this confession. Like i said before, it’s very true to Baxter’s character, and it also shows, that despite having good intentions and doing everything you can to change, people can still slip back into their old habits. But there will be people around you that believe you can learn and do better, and will stay with you and help you through it.

I also adore the overall silliness (after the angst is over, but i do love my fair share of angst as well) and the emotional beats. The characters banter, joke around.

And express how much they care about each other.

Also the fact that Miranda, Terry and Cove just gawked at the pair while they were having this huge emotional event is just hilarious. They are very nosy friends and i love them for that lol. Of course, Baxter is completely unaffected. GB Patch knew that if they made this man blush more than he already does in the game, they would actually kill us.

I'm not kidding, i die every time he blushes and get revived when he snorts. That's just the circle of life.

So yeah, that was one out of the three confessions! It's amazing and i hope i was able to convey what i love about it! Prior to playing the Baxter DLC i had around 50 hours on Steam, and after i got it It turned into 120 hours so... Yeah, Baxter Ward.

I'm splitting my confession ramblings into three posts for convenience. Parts 2 and 3 will be finished soon... Hopefully. Once they are i will place links to all the parts in each post (if i learn how to,,,,). Also wow, this post took me way too long to write, holy shit.

Peace out <3

Part 2!

#baxter ward #baxter dlc #our life beginnings & always #our life beginnings and always #olba baxter #olba #gamer hours #sunbloom talks #our life #gb patch games #haru's surname is going through a crisis #in that playthrough i used “nakamura” but i often use “kealoha” as well #i'm working on step 1 haru drawings so you'll see in sometime!!

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