Leeuwerik Baudelaire (Hollandse Circus 4/4)
Alouette Baudelaire was twenty-two years old now, and though she had left van Manker’s great Dutch circus a long time ago, it had never quite left her mind.
There were a great many things to remember about it. The gross mistreatment that the performers suffered, was but one horrid thing in a sea of sweet nostalgic things, seaglass memories from a grimy childhood she was sure she would never fully leave behind.
She remembered the shadow plays Dijkgraaf would put on for them, the stories Mr. Chandri would tell about the far east, and how it felt as if she’d laughed all night when she was nine and tried whiskey for the first time, after the guests had long left the circus tent and the kids were free to dance around and draw figures in the shallow sand there. The games of truth or dare that they played, the time Dijkgraaf’s daughter Musetta had dared her to kiss Hendrik Csokas on the cheek.
Oh, the Csokas brothers. She thought about them every day.
Allie had left the Netherlands when the circus tent burned down in 1859. She was twelve, and without a home. There was no more circus, and her friends were scattered to the winds, and there was certainly nothing for her in Haag.
The only word that came to her mind had been England. And so, that was where she went. From there on, it felt as if every step along Allie’s way had been a sleight of hand. A trickery.
The trapeze artist who had taught her and the other girls at the circus, Mrs. Rozárka Cristiniy, had been a professional ballet dancer in her youth, and so she had trained her girls with bone hard determination and discipline that would make a soft child crumble.
Not to have them ballet dancing on stage. No, the richest families in Haag were already paying to see that at the Amsterdam Opera. Van Manker had no interest in showing his audiences something they could pay to see elsewhere.
Cristiniy trained the girls to tie themselves up in silk, tenfold of feet in the air, only to let themselves fall and trust that the ties would catch them. She trained them to sit poised in metal rings in the air, holding on with bare hands, grinning, white stars painted around their wide eyes. She trained them to fly in the air from one swing to another with zero hesitation, nothing in their minds but determination that they were more than skilled enough to grab onto the hands of the one who was meant to be catching them.
In order to teach them that kind of steel hard skill, Cristiniy trained them to be ballet dancers on top of it all. Allie became the greatest among them all. The star attraction, van Manker’s very own Leeuwerik: Little Lark.
Van Manker loved her dearly. And he stopped at nothing to prove his affections to her, every night in her caravan, even when she said no.
She did not tell Mrs. Cristiniy about this, but it was hardly a secret. However, Mrs. Cristiniy was under van Manker’s mercy just as much as any other circus performer. All she could do was push Allie to perseverance, turn her into a diamond in the rough, encourage her to keep becoming greater, no matter what.
Mrs. Cristiniy died only a few months after Dijkgraaf. It was believed that the two of them had a passionate affair, and that perhaps it was the heartbreak that killed her.
And as a result of this hardship, and with all her motivation to live up to Cristiniy’s expectations and to honor her memory, Allie would always be able to do the impossible.
She could tie knives to her ballet shoes with string and dance for hours on the tips of the blades. She could smile through pain other dancers could only dream to hold their poses to. And though she was often the shortest in a crowd, she stuck out because she held her head the highest, held herself with the most poise, and moved in every elegant way imaginable.
And these impossible feats landed Allie Baudelaire in a good ballet academy.
The other girls could not decide if they loved or hated Allie. She was a miserable little underdog orphan outlander from across the sea who spoke broken English, and had learnt everything she knew from a retired, bitter, alcoholic woman who used to be something great in a country none of them had ever visited.
But Allie did not care. Being in the circus, being little Leeuwerik, had taught Allie everything she needed to know about withstanding dirty looks. She could take all of it without breaking a sweat.
At her graduation showcase when she was fifteen, she was pulled aside by a scout from the Royal Ballet in Covent Garden, and asked if she was interested in a job. She’d made a crude gesture at the other girls as she was taken to the Royal Ballet in a beautiful cart.
During Allie’s Christmas break, after she had lived in London and danced for the Royal Ballet for seven years, something was tugging at her heart, telling her to visit Birmingham, as if there was something waiting for her there. Allie thought of what had happened the last time she felt an inclination to go somewhere, and she remembered how successful it had been. Then, she bought a train ticket, headed north.
Allie liked Birmingham. Where London was quiet, busy, and in denial about the grime within its own city walls, Birmingham was little and loud and dark and it embraced its griminess fully. Flickering gas lanterns were hung out on lines over the roads, horses pulled carriages with bells that sang gently in their harnesses, old men walked hunched over along the roads and nodded at everyone they saw. The landlady of the apartment Allie was renting for the week was a middle-aged woman who talked too much and forbade any men in the house, even though she seemed to bring home a new gentleman every night. Allie did not mind. She was used to sleeping through noise.
After a childhood in the circus, of owning almost nothing, Allie had developed a fondness for small trinkets, pocket-sized, rings and lockets and hairpins and brooches, anything she could hold in the palm of her hand. Therefore, most of her days were spent wandering the streets, entering almost any shop she could find, looking for nice little trinkets for herself.
Until one day, she came across a little building, a frostbitten sign dangling above the door, which read “DR. CSOKAS’ PSYCHIATRIC CLINIC.” That had made her stop dead in her tracks.
Because surely, the Csokas she once knew, was not the only Csokas in the world, and surely the chance of him being here was miniscule.
But a chance was a chance, no matter the odds. And so, Allie Baudelaire opened the door - a bell rang as she did - and stepped inside a quaint little room. There were neat paintings on the wall, benches that looked somewhat uncomfortable, a pretty persian rug, and a small fire dancing in the brick fireplace. Towards the other end of the room, there was a front desk and a great hardwood door next to it, and Allie had her back to it, trying to read the signature on one of the paintings, when she heard footsteps from the door. She spun around, and there he was, and what could she do but grin?
“My God,” Siebren said slowly in Dutch, a small smile widening into a grin across his lips. “Alouette. You’re aliv-”
He did not get to finish, because she was already there, wrapping her arms around him in a tight hug, and he laughed, easing his arms jankily around her, as though he were a robot.
“Goodness, goodness, goodness,” she said as she pulled back to look at him, grinning. “You’re taller than last, Siebren.”
“Well, you aren’t,” he replied, raising one eyebrow, smiling. For that, he received a gentle punch to the arm. He laughed, pulling his old friend into a second hug. They stood like that for a little while. Perhaps they were both very lonely in the real world, after growing up in the circus pack. Perhaps they’d both needed this for a long time.
“This clinic- it’s all yours?” she asked after a little, pulling back to look around, admiringly.
“Yes,” Siebren said, brushing dust off one of the painting frames and crossing his arms. “The old owner, Dr. Constantinescu, taught me everything he knew. So now, I’m a professional headshrinker. Isn’t that nice?” he asked, humming quietly, suddenly obsessed with making sure the room looked presentable.
“It’s great,” she said, looking at him, nodding as if she’d known all along that something like this was going to become Siebren’s reality, eventually. “I always knew - we all did - that there’d become something good out of you one day. Looks like we were right, hey?”
“Oh, shut up,” he muttered, cheeks slightly red, grinning crookedly up at her. “What about you, Alouette? What’s become of you?”
“I’m a dancer now,” she said, almost braggingly, raising her eyebrows at him, grinning when his smile widened. “At the Royal Ballet. Would you believe it?”
“Yes, actually,” he said, leaning back against the front desk, laughing quietly. “I would believe it. If anyone could pull off a feat like that, it would have to be you.”
“Stop it,” she grinned, running her fingers along the edge of the leaf of a large plant that stood potted in the corner.
“Have they let you do your knife number yet?” he asked, one eyebrow raised.
“I am working on it, actually. I could try and secure you a ticket,” she said, smirking.
“Oh, I expect nothing less, Alouette, now that I know not only that you’re alive, but that you’re going to be a star the way we all believed you would be,” he grinned. “Here, why don’t we discuss this more over dinner? I know a nice little place. We’ve a lot to catch up on,” he suggested, and Allie brightened like a flame.
“Oh, I’d love that, Siebren.”
Then, Siebren locked up his clinic while Allie waited for him.
Messenblok and Leeuwerik linked arms and walked off in the snow, perhaps the two most unlikely friends in the world, talking all the way, brought together by a past that neither of them deserved. And even so, they were both laughing and smiling, because they had made it out alive, because they had honored every memory they had sworn to honor. Because finally, they had both broken even.
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Now I would like to ask you, in turn: Favorite acts/scenes from ten operas you love?
Thank you!!! You have no idea how much it makes me smile to see an ask in my inbox!!! Here goes, in no particular order:
Don Carlo: Ahhhhh well, I guess I have to choose something...maybe Act IV, Scene 1. You have Filippo’s big scene (ALL THE FEELS), the bass/bass showdown that is absolutely legendary, you have Elisabetta calling EVERYBODY out and being the strong, amazing woman she is, that phenomenal quartet, that scene for Elisabetta and Éboli that rips my heart out every time (seriously, I physically cannot listen to the line ‘Io...io stessa...avea...comm’esso!’ without crumpling. it’s bad.), and of course, you have perhaps the greatest mezzo aria of all time, ‘O don fatale’, to close it out. It’s just one phenomenal piece after another, and I love how much it focuses in on the characters and allows us to get to know them (ESPECIALLY the more morally dubious ones) a lot better.
Les Huguenots: As much as part of me is begging me to say Act IV, my heart is saying the last two scenes together (Act V, Scenes 2 and 3, which are often combined as Act V, Scene 2 or even as just Act V). This is for a lot of the same reasons as Act IV, Scene 1 of Don Carlo: (for the most part) this is essentially a huge trio in several movements with occasional interventions from the chorus and a couple other characters and I feel like every part just gets better and more intense and more heartbreaking...and I emotionally die in the middle every time. (Specifically, if not earlier, at the line ‘Ils ne chantent plus.’) Anyway the music slaps HARD (and I CANNOT with all the repetitions of ‘A Mighty Fortress Is Our God’), and once again, I just love how much this focuses in on our leading trio and lets us, the audience, get to know them that much better only to be like ‘okay now they’re gonna die’ DAMMIT THAT’S NOT GOOD FOR ANYBODY BUT I LOVE IT SO MUCH anyway I need to stop writing so much for each of these because if I do it’ll take forever
La bohème: Act II, for a combination of sentimental reasons and the fact that it is just so good! You get the street scene with all those amazing choruses but you also get hijinks and love and happiness and it’s Puccini so you get great tunes. And of course, we all know that a) Musetta’s Waltz is an absolute BOP and b) we all secretly want to be Musetta. At least I do.
Dialogues des Carmélites: I am legally obligated to say the Salve Regina because a) it’s the scene that got me hooked on this opera, b) it’s an amazing piece of music, and c) THE FEELS I DIE EVERY SINGLE TIME. Even though I SHOULD know that the guillotine is going to happen it ALWAYS throws me off whenever it comes in for the first time and I’m like WTF WTF NOOOOOOOO and the part where Blanche comes back? kill me. just...kill me.
Un ballo in maschera: Act III, Scene 1! Once again this is a lot like Don Carlo, Act IV, Scene 1 because it’s a super-intimate scene and the music SLAPS from start to finish. Amelia and Renato/Anckarström’s arias are both incredible and make me feel ALL THE FEELS, and they’re also great at showing parts of their lives that we don’t really get to see much of elsewhere, respectively the mother and the lover. Then there’s the whole conspiracy trio-turned-quartet, which is amazing, AND THE LOT-DRAWING SCENE. It’s so creepy and extra and the music is just perfect for the scene. And of course, we top it off with Oscar coming in and being his delightful self while everyone else is either angsting or plotting and it’s all in one quintet that works??? so??? well??? like??? how???
Die tote Stadt: ‘Glück, das mir verblieb’ AND its return in the final scene. First off, it’s some of the most gorgeous, cinematic, heartbreaking music in all opera. Seriously, drop what you’re doing and go listen to it (especially the one with Carol Neblett and René Kollo). But also, it’s just this amazing, seemingly-simple little song that’s about grief and what it’s like to lose someone you love and it HURTS. Also, it’s like the one time in the entire opera when Paul and Marietta are actually getting along because pretty much everywhere else their relationship is INCREDIBLY messed up. And then the last verse coming back in the final scene, when Paul sings it alone as he finally works up the courage to move on, leave Bruges, and start over...I die every time.
Falstaff: While perhaps my favorite individual part of this opera is the finale, ‘Tutto nel mondo è burla’, my favorite scene is Act II, Scene 2, which is absolutely comedy GOLD from start to finish. It’s late Verdi so you know the music is going to be amazing, and it is, and it’s all so light and fizzy and just plain FUN. I also just love all the women working together to outsmart a creepy old guy, all the men being Clueless, Nannetta and Fenton just trying to get a moment together...and I love how much this scene makes fun of opera tropes, especially the “we’re going to stand around and sing about how we need to do something while not actually doing that thing” trope. Also, thank you Shakespeare, Verdi, and Boito for the laundry basket stuff. That is absolutely priceless.
Tosca: This could be a veritable coin flip between the finales to Acts I and II (if nothing else, you have to acknowledge that Puccini knew how to end an act. he did.), but I’ll go with the finale to Act II. Obviously I love MURDER TIME and everything Tosca is screaming at Scarpia (and yes, ‘Questo è il bacio di Tosca!’ is arguably the best line ever) and the music for that part is so amazing, but my favorite thing is actually what happens afterwards...the one melody that keeps coming back (the daa-daa-daa-da-da-da-da-DAAAAA) is so awesome, I love the line ‘E avanti a lui tremava tutta Roma!’, and pulled off well, this can tell you so much about Tosca and everything she’s going through. I love it.
Die Zauberflöte: Anytime Papageno is onstage (yes he is also my favorite character) OR ‘Der Hölle Rache’. I love Papageno for a lot of the same reasons you do; he’s fun, he’s a sweetheart, he doesn’t really want to get involved in all this Masonic mess, he just wants true love and happiness. And all his music is amazing. And then of course, Der Hölle Rache is just absolutely iconic and terrifying as hell and I NEVER get tired of hearing sopranos hit those high Fs. I love.
Faust: The Cathedral Scene (depending on the version, this could be Scene 1, Scene 2, OR Scene 3 of Act IV because Act IV of this opera, and directors’ stagings of it, are weird). This is one of those rare soprano/bass or bass-baritone duets in opera and the music is absolutely incredible (THE PIPE ORGAN). Even more than that, I love it because it’s so great at portraying psychological trauma/disintegration because no matter where this scene is placed Marguérite has experienced some Extremely Bad Things and has an incredible amount of shame and Catholic Guilt and she’s trying to keep things together but Mephistopheles is just taunting her about how terrible of a person she must be and Marguérite is just trying to hold it all together and she’s praying and trying not to lose her mind but everything just seems like it’s condemning her and she just. can’t. deal. with. it. I mean...damn it’s an intense scene.
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