#me when I go crazy over “haha yeah but like does he actually hate me unironically? I'd hate myself too haha i don't blame him”

[cosmicquilt]

???: "Of course! That's why Ratio's betrayal was one of the keys to your plan. I have to say, that doctor's acting was superb."

Aventurine:

(idk what story part this is from, but I have screenshots).

#me when I go crazy over “haha yeah but like does he actually hate me unironically? I'd hate myself too haha i don't blame him” #hsr #honkai star rail #hsr aventurine #aventurine #aventurine honkai star rail #AGH YOU DON't understand... i love aventurine so much. #RRRGHHHH #hsr spoilers

[pix3lplays]

@sailorstar9 who hit me with “ex-husband Aventurine trying to woo you back from Ratio” because yes

And @fire-lizard-ro because they put up with me talking about this all the time lol-

Cw! Ex-husband Aventurine, you have kids with him, I’m thinking two, you’re divorced for a reason, Aventurine is petty and wants you back, reader is with Ratio now, also neither of these men are great partners so…toxic family environments and such, sharing a bed

-Ex-husband Aventurine stuff because ugh I’m obsessed-

Does Veritas Ratio treat you much better than Aventurine did? Not really, but he was definitely preferable to your ex.

At least Veritas didn’t have a chronic gambling problem or ignores the kids or spends long nights away from home doing who KNOWS what.

At first Aventurine acts like he doesn’t care at all that you’ve finally had enough and had to divorce him. Your loss in his eyes. He’ll live without you.

But if it doesn’t bother him that much you do wonder why he goes to such lengths to show off his new partners to you. And it always seems to be someone new each month. Unsurprisingly. Makes sense that you were the only person who could put up with him long enough to marry him.

But when he finds out you’ve found a new boyfriend…and it’s VERITAS RATIO?? The jealousy is THERE, and honestly you can see it written all over Aventurine, regardless of how he acts around you.

So now you’re living at Veritas Ratio’s nice place, with your kids from your marriage to Aventurine. You like Veritas. They’re not his kids, but he takes an interest in their education and helping them be the best versions of themselves. He helps them with their homework, without just giving them the answers…yeah he’s not affectionate with your kids, they’re not his, but he doesn’t ignore them like Aventurine used to.

It’s ALWAYS awkward when Aventurine stops by to pick up or see his kids. He always brings presents, always does what he can to make it look like he’s suddenly an amazing and attentive dad, but you know he’s only doing it to try and impress and win you back.

Without shame too-he flirts with you RIGHT in front of Veritas. But Veritas has heard your stories about Aventurine. He’s not worried about you going back to him.

Veritas will just listen to the flirting, maybe step in with a little, “isn’t it about time you leave?” if Aventurine is going too far.

The tension between your ex and your boyfriend is INTENSE.

And by that I mean Aventurine feels very threatened by Veritas, and Veritas doesn’t feel threatened by Aventurine at all. It’s kind of like a one sided rivalry.

Also Aventurine absolutely does that thing where he conveniently leaves his sunglasses at your place so he has an excuse to come back, but you’ve learned to foil him by letting Veritas give him the sunglasses back at the door-just imagine how disappointed Aventurine is when it’s Veritas answering the door instead of you haha…

He calls you in the evening under the guise of “oh don’t you want to say goodnight to the kids?” but he ALWAYS tries to keep you on the phone after that. Just hang up on him. If it was up to Veritas you would just block his number but he understands that’s not practical.

Aventurine would try to use the kids to win you back but to be honest?? They don’t miss him that much. Honestly they prefer Veritas as their new ‘dad’. (Plus they’re gonna wish Veritas was actually their dad when they start getting bullied for being part Sigonian. Just sayin-)

Aventurine is jealous jealous JEALOUS he hates the thought of Veritas even touching you let alone the fact that you share a bed with that man…it drives him CRAZY. He’s not married to you he has No claim over you so he has no business being so jealous but he is anyways…

Eventually he’s not even subtle about how badly he wants you back. Just blatantly inviting you to dinner or over to wherever the heck he’s staying at the moment or to the casino to help you de-stress from all that time spent around Ratio-surely being around Ratio THAT much isn’t good for your health~

Of course you’re not falling for that. You’re not letting Aventurine back into your life more than you have to.

You really don’t want Veritas to feel like he has to get involved, but he has his pride. He can only handle Aventurine blatantly flirting with his partner for so long.

So far you’ve avoided a confrontation but Aventurine needs to start treading lightly if he doesn’t want a Codex to his face haha…

#honkai star rail #honkai star rail x reader #Aventurine #Dr Ratio #Hsr Aventurine x reader #honkai star rail Aventurine x reader #Hsr Dr Ratio x reader #Dr Ratio x reader #Aventurine x reader #honkai star rail Dr Ratio x reader

[onebraincell-itmiebcraft]

Okay time for the liveblogging of real life in order (liveblogging life SMP call that lifeblogging) I have never done this b4 be easy on me

Grian

I've already watched his perspective at like 5 in the morning but heyyyyy nothing wrong with rewatching with added non sleep deprived commentary but also not really memories of what I originally thought watching this too :^))

I remember being so stunned they called it real life and the anatomically correct heart 🫀tickled my funny bone heeheehoo hahaha

Thought when grian said replay 3rd life I thought they'd reenact it 😭

We live in a society taxes man (I could ramble about it)

GRIAN IRL FACE!!!

has anyone fell over btw?

No lie that B can BIG

Reminds me of slimecicle jshitt and traves VR Minecraft where Travis got progressively shorter what a laugh

Does Scott ever see his scream

Is it take the Mick or take the nick love that idiom

RENDOG!

Scar looks like a child doing that thing

Awww hug

ABUSE

scar take the headset off dzuh 🫀🫀🫀

Grian literally me balance issues

Yugioh????

I called it, scar would say he's American 😎

I'm eating dinner while watching this at the same time what fun w

Giran called solidaritygaming jimmy no way + he died first fr this time + loud "ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!" Perfectly timed his mic peaking is iconic

Ha haa!

He ear him bread

Really putting the mine in craft for Minecraft

reminds me of secret life EP 4 and scar is sweaty

*scar noises*

How did scar drop his phone???

Check your wrist? More like check your a- (tom cardy référence)

I love the way VR makes you hit stuff goofy

Can you run in game if you irl

(watch him die)

Haha he died

Why Jim is he sabotaging him

Jim Jim Jim gym gym

Doesn't Jim die here oh LMFAO he does

Jimmy you are famous to me

(scout voice) Chicken

How did scar die???

I love how vr makes them expressive Jim pointing to village house is so funny

There's only one bed

Wtf is happening in top right corner in 9min 30 sec

Ayyyyy there's grian the maniac love the casual position of the arms

Last life you can join me moment

Egg

Grian gaslighting

Jimmy you wanna dance quote of the year

PvP is so silly

Skizz is fighting a losing battle Jim killed him icon

I love how grian and Jim's yells overlap there's probably something music theory there idk

Awww scar he's so funny

Go pick him up from daycare haha

Facing away from the camera we live in a society

OHHHHH impulse big smart man Jimmy's arm movements are so smooth it's solly

Jimmy immediately leaving for fish cocomelon brain I agree

Love the arm movements

Lol they actually like down

It's okay grian scuffed is worth celebrating

Has anyone layed on their side

Friend just texted me about my monologue what am I doing man I have an audition tomorrow

Anyway Minecraft vr

The lying down model inventory so goofy

Rewatching the bread scene no wonder tumblr loves it looks like Jim jam actually has a mouth 👄

Impulsesv guess the build sheep flashbacks

Best sleepover

Polyamorous tony (died)

Sleepover reminds me of crazy Christmas w/gem and pearl

Grown men learn how to close doors

Minecraft fatshaming grian smh my head

Man thought it was more than Joel there + o2 max(xing) scar love it (i use maxxing ironically) (it's such a stupid suffix to me linguistically funny) (I hate incels) (don't cancel me tumblr) (I love all genders)

Two steps: die, and die

Jimmy isn't on fire??

Casual "it burns so much!" Love it

Wait right Jim still has a wooden sword

Joel Joel Joel Joel you know that one part in waiting for Godot where they just go back and forth in saying aideu yeah

So silly

Jim saying get in British people man

"noffing" - joel is it a British thing

Love Joel screaming he's so malding

Just remembered how scary heights are in VR because I thought for a second "why don't they jump down? are they stupid?" (Meme Reference) (Didn't actually think that) ("Stupid" is kinda stupid but I digress)

Hole

Boob stroke

Does scar enjoy the swimming

Why *does* swimming cause motion sickness anyway

Why bucket scar (this is a bucket)

Brain eating amoeba

GOON SQUAD!!!

Love Grian's arm movements I really did thonk Jim was gonna win for the funnies

He says come here weirdly

The joy of killing

Is Jim punching

It's okay hiking simulation

Go Jim go what a gamer boy

I remember the triple dog door dugout is like... Gem's? Joel's? Uhhhh I fotgor

Concussion era

Fresh meat

I just love their dynamics

JIM STOP SOUNDING LIKE THAT it's like his eyes are 🥺 and his mouth is boowomp spongebob like he's got tears in eyes scrimblo sounding ass

Ohhh there's my favourite theatre kids

'orrible

Joel saying boys make me happy

Wait that can misinterpreted

Joel saying "boys" sounds pleasant to my ears

I remember watching this part and going GRIAN FIRST OUT HUH???

awww the funnies

Love the way gem says "we're the last Grians. Grians? Greens!" It's like... Spunky

Grian falling reminds me of my scuffed keyboard when it registers a button press as a hold and then I like never stop walking right *sigh*

The downward spiral by nine inch nials

Ascending is TRUE watcher lore

Oh the music is so cute

Bye scar! Bye Joel!

Okay never let me liveblog cook again i kinda listened to the vid instead of watching reading this does not make sense to anyone but me reference hell half formulated thoughts RIP BOZO HAHA

Maybe I'll like do it in 5 mins chunks for JJJJJJoel and the next ones onward I spent like an hour on this wayyyyy too long for incomplete sentences

End

#real life smp #real life #real life spoilers #rlsmp #grian #liveblogging #life series #life smp #trafficblr #what is wrong with me #rlsmp liveblogging

[fucksurass]

DEAD? Park!

Pt.3

Stan: Kenny...? You um-

Stan: Yesterday you were all... Weird? Now youre um.... Not..

Kyle: What hes trying to say is, What the hell happened after school yesterday because you actually look... Okay.

Stan: Yeah you dont look like a mess like after Pocket got here. You left insane and came back chillin. What happened?

Kenny: You mean apart from fucking Cartmans mom?

Cartman: WHAT KENNY- YOU- I HOPE YOU FALL ON YOUR POOR UGLY ASS-

Kenny: Im kidding! I read porn and imagined fucking her!

Cartman: THAT DOESNT MAKE IT ANY BETTER YOU DIRTY-

Kenny: And I said to myself, Im going crazy! No one died! Im just a little messed up right now because of stress! So I whipped out my weiner and started jacking it.

Cartman: Dear god, can Kenny please fall off his chair and bust his ass.

Kyle: Awe Kenny come on!!

Stan: Not what I wanted to hear today.

Kenny: What? At least im not acting crazy anymore. Id say this is normal.

Stan: ....

Cartman: ....

Kyle: ....

Kyle Cartman and Stan: Yeah hes got a point. Id believe it. Regular Kenny.

Kenny: Oh and those books arent gonna help you at all Stany boi. I suggest giving it up.

Stan: Come on dude... Let a man dream...

Kenny: Wendys probably a lesbian dude.

Kyle: Yeah she probably totally definitely is.

Stan: What...?

Kyle: Yeah... You should go for someone el-

Cartman: Faggot.

Kyle: Shut the fuck up Cartman!

Stan: Yeah! Wendys not a faggot! Im sure she'll come back. She always does...

Cartman: That went over your whole head, Stan.

Stan: What went over my head?

Kyle and Cartman: *face palm*

Mr. Garrison: Okay class.... Sadly and Unfortunately for me... Theres another.. New student-

Kenny: WAH thud! OW!!

Cartman: BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA THANK YOU GOD

Ze Mole: Fuck god!

Kenny: Stop laug- ....Mole..?

Garrison: You know him?

Stan: All four of us do! Hey man!

Garrison: Thats cool. Anyway say hello to Christofeet- Chris- Christophne something or other or- Just call him Ze Mole.

Ze Mole: I have returned on behalf of Gregory. I wanted to ask if La Resistance lived on after I- er left... For.. War?

Pip: Hello Mole!

Ze Mole: Ah... You are here..

Cartman: Yeah we all hate Pip too dont worry.

Ze Mole: Sure.

Stan: Kenny? Oh not again... I swear..

Kyle: What- Oh...

Mr. Garrison: Can we please sit down? Im still teaching. Who else in here is gay?

Cartman: STAN AND KAH- OW KAHL WHAT THE FUCK

Ze Mole: ...Why are you looking at me like zat Kenny? Stop.

Pip: In a matter of seconds, dear Mole, Kenny well have assumed your death.

Ze Mole: How-

Kenny: Okay I am seriously fucking positive we WATCHED that guy die!

Stan: Come on Kenny! You were doing great!

Kyle: You almost had it then you blew it!

Kenny: We watched it happen guys! Cartman didnt turn off the alarm and he got attacked by guard dogs-

Ze Mole: I hate guard dogs... What a terrible way to die! Do not wish zat on me!!

*CLANG*

Cartman: Haha! Sick!

Stan: Oh my god! Ze Mole killed Kenny!

Kyle: You french bastard!

Mr. Garrison: Please be careful with that thi-

Ze Mole: Was my mozer careful when she shot me in my leg while I vas still in ze womb?!

Mr. Garrison: ...I guess not.

Craig: Dude sit down! You killed Kenny!

Red: Whos Kenny-

Ze Mole: Do not worry.

Ze Mole: Though he dies, La Resistance lives on.

Cartman: Nobody gives a crap about Las resilience! Lets all just wait for the rats to consume Kennys body so we can continue naming all the fags in the classroom.

Mr. Garrison: Lets all listen to the fat kid.

Clyde: Guys im not a faggot...

Pt. 2

Pt. 4

#south park #artists on tumblr #digital art #art #DEAD? Park! #ze mole #sp pip #pocket south park #south park stan #sp kyle #south park cartman #kenny sp #red south park #craig south park #gregory sp #mr. garrison #au #south park au

[momotonescreaming]

Momoooo!! KingSteve is online p2 and Dustin is a bully? Pretty please? 🤲

Nebs my beloved! Hello! Thank you for the ask 💜💜

KingSteve is Online was supposed to be a quick sequel to a ficlet I made ages ago, of an AU where Stranger Things was set in an ambiguously late 90s/ early 00s setting. Purely so I could make them IM using absolutely horrific chatspeak. And to make them chat even more - Steve has gone off to college with Robin, and Eddie is still stuck back in Hawkins. Feeling a little lost, and like everyone has moved on without him.

It feels like it could be a super long fic, and that's intimidating, so this wip has mostly fallen to the background. Whoops.

My previous snips for Dustin is a Bully are here, here, and here. Not sure what else I can add for this one, other than I like writing Steve standing up for himself. He's not a pushover, and Dustin being a real cunt isn't going to turn him into a doormat.

Snips below, just for you 😘💜

---

KingSteve85 is Online

KingSteve85: ppl aren’t forced here like they are w high school. or at least not the same haha. so theyre a lot more cool ab things. since they made the choice to be here. its chiller

KingSteve85: that doesnt include those kids who get a first hit of freedom and go fuckin crazy tho

KingSteve85: does that make sense? haha

Eddie sits, and breathes, and watches as Steve’s messages ping through. And when they do — Eddie lets himself sit in it for a moment. Let the words wash over him, let the pixels of the screen burn their way into his retinas.

That actually sounds sort of nice. Going to a school where everyone isn’t scared of you, or hates you, or both. Surrounded by people who actually want to be there. Maybe he’s romanticising it, he doesn’t know what it’s actually like. He probably never will. Hell, who is Eddie kidding, he’ll never know what college is like. He’s not cut out for it.

---

Dustin is a Bully

It’s not like Dustin’s been saying anything that’s untrue. Steve told him about his grades in high school, how essays and such ‘weren’t his thing’. He doesn’t know even the most basic scientific principles — shit him and The Party have been talking about since middle school. Steve graduated high school yeah, but he didn’t get into college. Obviously, since he’s still in Hawkins.

“Plus it’s not like you can’t take it,” Dustin adds, scowling. Steve’s older, he’s tough, he can handle a few harsh truths.

“Yeah, but I shouldn’t have to, Dustin,” Steve adds, leaning forward on the recliner, steely gaze settling into something angrier. More intense. “I thought you were my friend.”

---

Make me write, send me asks!

#ask #findafight #momo writes

[pikaflute]

okay i did my superball headcanons now time for my other pookie (flint paper)

older than sam and max but not by much, probably like early to mid 50s

divorced twice, it's fine though

trained in like martial arts, i think he should be allowed to throw people around more (normal)

actually enjoys sam and max company. partially because he is insane but also because they're funny to him. like haha you boys throwing anvils on people? that's good love is love

he likes men and women. thats my truth. we will ship superball with him if its the last thing i fucking do!!!!

probably gets love letters from ladies and men who he helped on cases or flirted with to get info. and also max. a majority of them are from max. he can tell because they're misspelled

i think he needs to be hairy. for my sake. i also don't think he shaves. again im normal. normal poster

i think he had a mullet when he was younger. one day he asks for help cleaning his office and sam and max find that picture of him in college with one and they go HUH and he goes oh yeah that was me and sam and max both desire him more carnally

he does classy drinking. he has like cognac and whiskey in office and those fancy decanters but will occasionally like down a bottle of vodka

user pikaflute when she hasn't said a character is from new jersey in the past twenty minutes: hey guys i think flint paper is-

has had to get his office fixed over twenty times. the landlord hates him but flint pays his (and sam and max's cause god knows they don't pay rent) rent so far in advance he is never getting kicked out

speaking of, he's probably rich. he's good at solving cases and threatening individuals pays a lot. even though sometimes he works on a "hunch" he's always proven right.

he's an only child. thats why he's crazy.

probably knows a bunch of languages for investigating. one time max hears flint speaking french and max is like "hes going to speak french to me while in bed" and sam goes "wait in fucking line"

probably did gymnastics as a teen. explains why he's so nimble and good at fighting. AND HOT

drinks coffee but so black it's still coffee grounds. he orders this from (girl) stinky all the time and she's like "im throwing this pot at you" and he's like "good! i need a pick me up!"

he did modeling at one point on his life on the side before becoming a full time investigator. if sam and max ever find those shoots they're going to fucking die

when sam and max were first moving in, flint did an entire background search on them and when he met them for the first time he told him everything he found out and sam and max both fell in love with him instantly.

one time he works on a case with sam and max and it causes so much property damage that the three of them are permanently banned from staten island

cannot cook to save his life. he asked sam if spaghetti is supposed to be black and sam was like "i....maybe not."

very good with kids surprisingly. he babysits for sam and max and asks geek if she wants like water or anything while he beats a guy up and she's like "i'm....good."

one time when sam and max actually did their job and brought a criminal into jail they saw flint in there and he was in the process of breaking out and he's like "hey boys! can you unlock the door for me?" and they both went "anything for you."

he 100% knows sam and max want him so bad it's not even funny. it's flattering to him

he doesn't drive. he just walks to places and somehow gets there faster than a car

also has a tattoo somewhere, probably on his back. i don't know of what, i'm just homo okay?

listens to jazz mainly. it fits the noir aesthetic. his office reeks of cigarettes.

[walks up to the mic] sock garters [everyone cheers]

he's autistic and he stims by shooting and beating people up. I'm only like half joking

i think hes shorter than superball by like an inch. so 5'8

i don't think he's played a video game since the 90s. he's a light gun shooter master though.

i also don't think he knows anything about modern pop culture at all. half the shit max says to him might as well be in a different language

sleeps naked cause he's Like That

doesnt like horror movies. they just make him angry and upset

#sam and max

[beanghostprincess]

What do you think about ZoSan. I love them but I don´t ship them. (hidding from the many ZoSan fans)

okay so my opinion here might be a bit controversial but i'm so cray cray i'm so brave i'm such a warrior in this fandom i'm just gonna say it:

i don't really like the zosan...

(btw i don't wanna spread hate but i'm too lazy to censor the ship name and tbh idk if it also shows up in the fyp if it's said in the ask??? i talk a bit negatively about it, so don't read it if you ship them in case it might bother you <3)

i love their dynamic and i've been saying they need to fuck since, like, the moment they started fighting on screen. the sexual tension is immaculate, please, just fuck already god- half of their problems would be solved asap if zoro pinned sanji against a wall already and fucked him so hard he spoke french.

i like the fact that although they're always arguing, they understand and trust each other when it comes to serious stuff. like yeah, we fight but we are not letting this affect the crew as a whole. they're just two very proud bastards who hate admitting they don't actually dislike each other that much. their whole dynamic is great in canon!!!! love to see them. i enjoy them a lot. they need to fuck already (saying this tho does not mean i ship them to an extreme extent. i just know gays when i see them).

however!!! i think my dislike towards the ship comes mainly from the fandom. because personally i enjoy them in canon and i like the content some people make of them (god knows i reblog zosan more than it looks like), but... the 90% of the content and shippers just make them so out of character they stress me tf out. i see a zosan shipper and i never know if they're the good kind or not and i start shaking with fear. and i'm a person that believes in "ship whatever tf you want bc everyone has different tastes and i'm not that crazy to fight over fictional characters and what other people like", but, y'know, bad experiences from my past idk.

they're not even in my top 10 op ships, but they exist. they're there. they're fun. they're cool, i guess. i feel very indifferent about them and if i see a cute/hot zosan thing i'll reblog it. but i don't seek content of them, y'know (unless i'm in a very sanji nsfw mood and the horniness takes over my original preferences. sometimes i just want sanji to be topped, i apologize).

but yeah, i'm very "meh" about them and the thing that makes me not really like them is the fandom, mostly. because there are some zosan shippers out there that just....................... they remind me of kiribaku shippers saying their ship is queerbait when it's very obviously NOT queerbait and claiming them to be canon when they're obviously not canon and etcetcetc. that, and the fact that a lot of people write/draw them extremely out of character. personally, for me soft zosan (i love soft zosan bc i'm a softie) could only work after a long-ass development and they'd still act like the idiots they are. that being said, nsfw zosan works every time in every universe bc, again, the sexual tension is tangible, man. and somehow people manage to do it out of character????? lmao.

people are SO obsessed with this ship bc it's easy to sexualize and easy to write because "haha boys fucking haha fighting haha" which is uhhhhhh not my thing, really. like i do love nsfw zosan but it also has to be written extremely in character and- idk i think that it's just on me.

basically, i'm indifferent about them and when i see people so so so hyped i just don't really get it. and then there's people that actively believe that they're queerbaiting and that instantly makes me angry, which translates into not liking the ship for a while. and when i go back to being indifferent and liking some stuff of them, i just don't really care much? and then i see someone writing them ooc and i dislike them again and- that over and over and over again.

and okay this whole thing seems stupid but i've had past experiences in fandoms and tbh saying that you don't like THE popular ship is like yelling at the shippers to attack you.

but, yeah, to summarize: i'm indifferent about them. i like them in very specific situations and content. most of the shippers and ooc content make me mad (which is like, most of them). but!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! the thing is: when zosan is done well, zosan is great. but when it's done out of character??? i can't fucking stand it.

i'm kind of contradicting what i said about not liking them because i do like them?? i just don't like them THAT much or to that extent and it has to be a very specific flavor?? and the shippers and content make me so mad sometimes i just stop reading fics or looking for content idk. i guess what i'm trying to say is that:

-> canon zosan cool

-> fanon zosan makes me dislike them

-> i don't really care and since this fandom is literally FULL of that ship i just have to live with it idk they're fine ig

#i wrote this super quickly but yeah #i just don't really like them much #they're fine #and some people are very annoying and have very strong opinions about them and i just don't care #but sometimes i read ooc stuff and it makes me MAD #but that's life ig #i do think they need to fuck tho

[m00nryy]

W: 🔞

—

Pei Ming is hosting a party after college graduation, he wanted to have one last young and wild memory before they have to fully become adults and work their asses off to survive this crazy world.

All around people are dancing, drinking and having fun, It's the end of their college lifes, the end of living careless, of partying every weekend not caring to go to class with a hangover on monday, so they have to make the most of it.

Next day will be time for them to become adults, responsible adults, provide for themselves, maybe build families, maybe not, but today it's time to party and enjoy life.

In a more quiet corner Pei Ming, Feng Xin, Xie Lian, Hua Cheng, Mu Qing, Ling Wen and Shi Qingxuan are sitting in a circle playing a cards game.

Beer bottles are scattered all around them and they can barely hear each other through the loud music and chatter of others.

Xl "tell your most embarrassing moment- ooh that's kinda hard"

Mq "haha yeah, cuz you have a lot of those, how can one possibly choose the most embarrassing of them"

Hc "yet they can't never be more embarrassing then your existence alone Mq"

Mq growls in annoyance at Hc's smirk smile. Hc has his arms wrapped around Xl's shoulders, with a smug posture and an air of protectiveness surrounding him.

Xl "Sang Lang!"

Hc only gives Xl a inocente smile and doesn't say anything else.

After Xl's answer the game continues in its previous playful atmosphere for a while.

It's now Mq's turn, he draws the card and falls silent immediately after reading it.

Everyone stares at him waiting in anticipation, but he says nothing.

Sq "c'mon, what does it say? Tell us!!"

Mq clears his throat, eyes fixated on the card, he's unsure if this will end well.

After some more minutes he gathered his courage to read the card out loud.

Mq "place an ice cube in your mouth and make out with the player on your left until the ice cube melts"

Pm "ho ho"

Lw "oh my"

The group try to hide their giggles as everyone stare at the person on Mq's left, who seems like he didn't get it yet, he looked back at them confused.

Fx "what're you all staring at me for?"

Pm "are you dumb? YOU'RE the person on his left"

Now he got it.

He looked at Mq who was looking the other way, and back at the group, with a expression on his face no one could quite figure it out.

He was silent for a minute before managing to say anything.

Fx "I'm not doing that"

He looked at Mq again, yet, this time the other was looking at him too.

Mq "you think I wanna make out with your ugly ass? I'm not doing it either!"

Mq cursed to himself, it could only be his damn luck.

Of course the one on his left would be non other then Fx, his sworn "enemy", the most annoying person ever, the man he hated the most.

They were in the same friend group but never got along, always arguing and driving each other mad, if they were in a room together for more than five minutes a fight would for sure occur between them.

The thing is, it was clear to everyone, but themselves, the extreme sexual tension they were suppressing and disguising as hate for each other.

The group was obviously tired of their endless bickering but no one wanted to meddle in business it wasn't theirs, so they just had to watch as Mq's eyes stared lovingly at Fx when the other was distracted in class every day.

Or Fx who would always take charge of the food in the group gatherings so he could make sure there wasn't anything Mq was allergic to.

It was actually funny to the others how they acted like they hated eachother to the bone but were always contradicting themselves, and they weren't even aware off it.

Part of the group was entertained watching Mq and Fx argue over the dare on the card, they didn't notice the mischievous look Pm and Sq exchanged before speaking.

Pm "you guys ratter drink Xl's special drink as punishment then?"

The boys fell silent, fear immediately could be seen in their eyes.

Before the game started the group agreed in a punishment rule in case a player didn't want to do what their card said, the punishment was to drink a cocktail made by Xl, who was known for somehow being able to turn into poison any drink or food he tried to make.

Fx "do you want us to die? That thing will for sure kill us!"

Sq "it was you who decided on the punishment, now you wanna back out? That's not very honourable of you"

Sq was hiding a devilish smile under his hands as he said this.

Pm "what are you scared of? That you might like it?" He teased.

Fx could feel a gaze upon him from his right side, like if anticipating his answer.

After a couple of minutes not saying anything Fx suddenly grabbed an ice cube from the cooler next to him, surprising the others, still hesitant he moved closer to Mq who looked surprised.

Lw "wait"

Mq was so nervous he screamed internaly, everyone turned to look at Lw expecting an explanation for the sudden protest.

Lw "a make out session between you two is not something I wish to have engraved in my mind -she pointed to a closet next to the spot they were in- do it there"

Fx let out a frustrated grunt. "you must be kidding me"

Hc "for once, I agree, I don't wanna see you two getting horny in front of me, shoo shoo, to the closet you go"

Sq "but don't try to cheat, we will be checking afterwards"

Fx "pervs"

Fx said before taking a new ice cube from the cooler and putting into an empty cup, he looked at Mq for a second before grabbing his hand and dragging him towards the closet trying not to mind the giggles of their friends.

Fx shoved Mq inside the closet and closed the door.

Mq grunted "do you wanna die?!"

Fx "let's... just get this over with "

His voice was weirdly shaky, he sounded nervous, what Mq found quite odd.

The closet was not big and the random stuff scattered all around made the space even more limited.

Fx grabbed the ice cube and tossed the cup to the side, his hands shaking a little, he took the cube up to his mouth and moved closer to Mq, his right knee started pressing between Mq's legs the more close he got and a shiver went up his back.

On the other end Mq's heart was going crazy, beating so fast it could bust out of his chest at any moment.

It felt like Fx was taking an eternity to get to him, his body was growing hotter and hotter at every second, Mq had to act, he grabbed Fx's shirt and pulled him closer.

Their lips finally touched.

The kiss started surprisingly slow, it was soft and hesitant, Mq felt his body tremble when his tongue came in touch with the ice on Fx's mouth, a mixture of hot and cold that was kinda confusing to the brain.

But it didn't take long before the kiss started to get fast and aggressive, Fx's hands grabbed Mq's wrists loosening the grip on his shirt and tightening the hold around his waist instead, he wrapped his on arms around the other's neck pulling him even closer.

They looked so desperate, their mouths parting only when their lungs hurt from the lack of oxygen, they were devouring one another like someone who was starved for a decade had just been given food.

It was a messy, cold, wet, desperate kiss, the little ice cube twirling between their tongues, it was weird, weirdly good.

Water was dripping from the corner of their mouths as the cube melted faster than expected, yet, when it melted completely, they didn't stop, on the contrary, things only got more heated.

Fx stoped the kiss and took a hold of Mq's waist sitting him on top of a pile of plastic boxes, he pulled on Mq's hair and licked the bare skin of his neck, he kissed and sucked on the skin making the other let out a loud moan, their already hard members brushed against eachother and Fx let out a moan as well, his hand falling immediately to the zipper of Mq's pants, the other did the same.

At this moment they weren't thinking about they rivalry, there wasn't time to evaluate their actions, the only thing their wanted was to appease that fire burning inside, that fire that had been burning since a long time but was keep at ease by both of them, and now that it was finally fueled they couldn't control it anymore, at least for today, they'll let the fire consume them.

They masturbated eachother while maintaining their mouths glued together, moaning between kisses.

The air inside the closet was hot, the sound of the music was muffled but it was still loud, shouts of people partying could still be heard outside yet it was like they completely forgot everything around them, at that moment there was only Mq and Fx.

They reached climax together, both panting, legs shaking, heads spinning, they looked at each other, how did it end like this? It was just a game, just a stupid card game, and it managed to break the walls they had built.

Years of represed feelings and desire just came crumbling down like a tower of cards because of a game, a stupid card game.

Mq took off his flannel and cleaned their hands with it, tying it around his waist right after, he pulled up his pants and straightened his hair, so did Fx.

After making sure they looked presentable again Mq grabbed Fx's wrist and was about to drag him out but was stoped.

Fx "wait, what are you doing?"

Mq got closer to Fx's ear "I need you inside of me right now or I might go crazy"

Mq didn't see how hard Fx blused nor allowed any time for him to protest, not that he would've, he opened the door and draged Fx out of that damn closet.

They didn't care about the party that was still going on, they didn't remember what they were doing before stepping into that closet and they also didn't care at this point, they didn't looked around nor acknowledged anyone, so naturally they didn't notice their friends gaze following them as they go up the stairs.

Sq "we lost them"

Pm "hahaha they're totally gonna fuck, about damn time"

Lw "fortunately I locked my room before everyone arrived"

Pm "oh shit, did I locked mine?"

At the other side Xl and Hc were making out with each other, not caring about anything else since a long time.

And since they lost two more soldiers the game wasn't fun anymore so they got up and went to enjoy the party with the others.

This night was the perfect end to the history of their college lifes, just like Pm wanted.

And it was probably the perfect beginning of the rest of their lives for some people.

—

The end? No

I'm doing a more spicy sequence to this cuz I just couldn't help myself, so expect a part 2 🤭

#originally posted on twitter #modern au #i will take every opportunity to make fengqing “f*ck it out” #heaven official's blessing #tgcf #fengqing #i go to sleep thinking about them and i wake up thinking about them #fengqing drives me crazy #feng xin #mu qing #tian guan ci fu #pei ming #shi qingxuan #ling wen #hua cheng #xie lian #tgcf fanfic #thread fic

[mapoeggplant]

Oh, i did sound like i criticized him, didn't I? Wasn't my intention at all, I actually agree with everything you said. Maybe I put it in wrong words haha, I love Shima too and I'm excited for this arc no matter what happens. I trust the author :) My point was that the whole Frankenstein thing (as a sort of setting up for future arcs, but not limited to that of course) and Shima kinda acting on impulses or even Yuzuki comment at the end of chapter gave me a feeling that things might not go.. smooth. And the added "high stake" is that their friend group is aware of the whole dating thing. But if a misunderstanding were to happen I don't see it in a negative way nor am I saying Shima is acting like a monster, my point was that it might be interesting for his development. Because I think that even if Shima makes a mistake and there is a falling out in the group, it's exactly as you said - he is not a doomed monster turned resentful or a bad person - he is very considerate and kind, like many characters notice and he does his best to correct mistakes he makes. And he is just a teenager only starting to confront his feelings. So if Shima realised that "being a bit lame" is not enough to make friends dislike you or for it to define you, I would also like him to realise that making that acting on negative feelings and messing up doesn't either. It totally might not happen in this arc but I would like to see something like that eventually. Especially since Shima tends to be very self-loathing, but also get defensive at the same time (which is very realistic reaction) (And unrelated, but I really like how Shima works through a lot of his feeling by acting) Also you didn't sound rude at all, you are very sweet! Thank you for discussing with me, you made a lot of great points :)

oh no, no please!! I didn't feel like you were criticizing him, what I felt imo was that you were more afraid?? like "I really like this character and I don't want to see him messing up so bad", you know? which is a very valid feeling that I understand a lot, honestly!!

i even wanted to talk more about this outside of our convo because I feel like a lot of people do have this fear, you know? like "shima is going to fuck it up again and I'm not ready" and I wanted to be like "nooo, let him make mistakes, it's going to be ok" oJFSAOIFJASIO so, before starting to answer you, I have to say I'm very sorry for mistaking this!!!

hmmm, I totally get you now, I think I didn't get some thing because, like I said, I thought it came from a place of being scared. I do agree with you, I think it might be great for his development and for his arc!! it's crazy for me to say that I kinda want mukai to be like "dude, can you think for a second before acting it up?" IOFJASIOFJ like idk, normally I would say chris should be the one to do so, but mukai knows more about this moment of his life than him. I'm also in a need for an interaction between mika, yuzuki and shima, so I think it would be great if they were to talk to him.

i also think ujiie will play a big whole on this arc. I think shima's jealously will appear a lot and it will clash with him at some point. let's see.

also, I agree a lot with you when you say

So if Shima realised that "being a bit lame" is not enough to make friends dislike you or for it to define you, I would also like him to realise that making that acting on negative feelings and messing up doesn't either.

because yeah, it will be GREAT for him to realize that being vulnerable and making mistakes won't make people hate you or get away from you.

it's going to be a very challenging arc for him, but a great one, I bet. one thing I'm afraid, and maybe that's why I did read your first ask as coming from a place of being worried, is that people will go down hard on him if he makes a mistake. I kept thinking over and over again on what I said to you before, even make a twitter post about it, because it has been on my mind since yesterday about how it's going to be very scary out here if he makes a mistake again...like some people aren't very open to see characters making mistakes and this scares me a lot!! I saw so many terrible things being said after the breakup, even about mitsumi which is very !!! to me like why are you saying terrible things about this angel (like how "selfish she is for imposing something on shima" like hello??? huh???).

idk I'm just very conflicted because I want everything to work it out fine but I also think it's going to be good if a little mistake happens because of their development as a whole, but I'm scared of people's reaction. IDK IDK, i talked way more than I should right now so I'm sorry for this huge reply HAHAH

anyways, I think now we're very on the same page, so I'm sorry for the initial response!! talking to you about these topics was really nice because it brought to me many other points that I will keep on feeding until I'm comfortable enough to find an answer. so sad how we'll only have a new answer in may, but sensei needs to rest as well so, let's hope for the best.

oh, thank you again and you are also very sweet!! 💛

#maybe shima can hang out with the whole girl group #that way the girls can vibe check him too #it would be kinda cute ngl #duckanswers

[cogmented]

hiiii i saw ur tags on my post!! i know nothing about breaking mc but i understand ur excitement completely!! i have no idea what they did but im so excited to find out!! this team is so cool they have cool abilities AND cool lore AND cool dynamics AND a cool aesthetic!! thwy make me INSANE. hope u dont mind me dropping this in ur ask box i just need to ramble about them somewhere

YOU R SO OKAY !!!! i loveeee what is going on rn

ermmm spoilers and wht not!

like WHAT !?!!? there is so much more of a crazy element to breaking da game than im used to, especially when used in the context of a pvp heavy turned lore (more so circumstance and event) based server like it ACTUALLY COMES INTO CONFLICT RAHH we r usually just a bunch of gamers sitting around in little test servers (i was more so an in-game code guy rather than an exploit guy, im basing all my inner technical knowledge on what my friends r thinking from the context ive shown them)

im SOOO interested in how the characters play out here, like with the tyrant groupchat and some of the key players in there (pangi, reddoons, planet, SPEPTICLE !?) and how THEY were the ones supposedly getting big power

i think planet knows a lot more about what's going on than what vitalasy thinks (i have a theory that planet's trust barrier was given by spoke, maybe it couldve been given by vitalasy to more so keep him quiet? but ive been brain rotting over a planet and spoke team up so im mad biased) and spoke is much more of a leaker than i thought! he is definitely one of the least secretive members about all dis and whatnot, but his ideals are geared towards fun fun for every1 (himself)

also vi is showing phase 2 rn this is going to be FUCKING INSANE ! im soo sosoooososososo exited omhgg kicking my legs laying on my stomach twirling my hair and drawing hearts and stars around the word exploit in glitter gel pen and giggling

this has been SUCH an interesting season im still stunned by stream viewers who say s3 was the best but maybe im a nerd whatavar whatavar ....

i am going to rant and you are going to listen to me >_( hahahahaha muahhahaha but s4 has been so new and interesting from the START. those two main groups forming at the village and the outpost and their outliers was the domino effect of extremes. im on red's side here when he said that that was the main catalyst for WHY duality duo went to the lengths they did, and how THAT, the moment subz stepped into the end to see the main island completely wiped was SUCH a crucial moment to the rest of s4 development

that was the known start. that's what, to everyone else, was the beginning of consequence

but now, there's the added factor of the plan before s4, but these extremes were needed to make a reason to use these exploits in an interesting way. yeah okay, leviathan is not a threat anymore. TO US THOUGH!!!! ONLY TO US!!! because we know everything, we know what's going on and leviathan has NO IDEA what they're in for, but what does terrain, leo, ANYONE ELSE think about them? Are they scared? probably !

but seeing this as a viewer.... a watcher haha of everything we KNOW a FRACTION of how much danger everyone is in. we dont know to WHAT EXTENT !!!!! HOLY MYSTERY !!!!! im so so so excited to see how they use this

we saw how jepex and mapic and spoke used it in jepex's latest video, but they have MORE INFORMATION SINCE THEN !!! AND INFORMATION THEY DIDNT REVEAL !!!! vitalasy is SO FUCKIGN AWESOME. SOOO COOL.

it has gotten so intertwined and complicated and layered i shouldve taken notes because im sure my memory has been warped and whatavar but WOW. RAHHHH. it's not JUST exploits. it's been zam's paranoia and terrain's frog plotline and anguish and medusa and the prison and and and no end and then no end^2 and all the teams and the betrayal and hate and the flowers and dandelions and the sun moon and stars and chaos and destruction and meaning and trust and love and care and and and

i go crazy on a friday evening i dont know i love lifesteal lots and lots

#long post #cogtalks #analysis #kind of

[malewifemammon]

oh yeah baby kam's peter post made me want to share some of my own thoughts abt him (but also i didn't wanna tack em on in a reblog bc my thoughts r very related to Personal Stuff About Me and i didn't want to make their post my storytime i guess haha)

cw for mentions of sexual harassment/assault under the cut, as well as discussion of germophobia and ocd! also uh maybe some peter hate so if u don't wanna read that don't open the post! and have a nice day ^_^

so like i'm definitely not the type of person to say that nobody should ever like characters who do bad things, or that unhealthy relationships should Never be portrayed in art. so if you like peter or his dynamic with alice, please don't take this as me saying you shouldn't do that.

but like i've been into this series since i was about twelve or maybe even eleven? (long hours largely unsupervised with my best friend at the local library waiting for my mom to finish work) and while i definitely didn't understand healthy relationship dynamics all that much, i still took issue with peter forcing a kiss on alice from the get-go. i'll be honest, that along with his attitude towards her made me hate him right off the bat. these days i definitely think he has interesting and/or comedic potential in some situations, but that particular side of him still freaks me out. obviously. he was my least favorite of alice's potential interests (besides the twins).

BUT something kam brought up in their post kind of clicked with me.

around middle school, i started developing symptoms of ocd (i think triggered by a lot of stressful life events happening in quick and intense succession on top of the usual chaos of middle school). eventually it got on to be actual ocd, which i still deal with to this day. and my biggest trigger has been germs/uncleanliness. i didn't used to have this obsession with contamination, so i'm pretty sure i didn't have it when i first got into nkna. but as time went on i saw more and more of myself in that aspect of peter.

i really didn't want to, since i disliked him so much (not to mention how often ocd or similar traits are either played for jokes in most media or given to eccentric villain types to make them seem more Weird™). but over time it got harder to ignore.

kam brings up that bc of his germophobia, peter doesn't really have much experience in the way of romantic/sexual interactions. and it made me think of myself.

because aside from my tendency to not be able to interact with others all that well, my cleanliness ocd is a big stumbling block in the way of physical intimacy, of ANY kind, but especially romantic/sexual since that tends to be more... involved. and there's the screenshot of peter telling alice smth about how he doesn't mind Her Germs specifically, which is probably something i've said almost word for word to my own partner. they were my first for a lot of things, both because of my anxiety but also because of the germ thing. (side note i love them very much they're so cool and good about My Tendencies lol) and it can be really weird to be in a relationship with someone who has a lot more experience than you sometimes, because it can be easy to worry that you're somehow letting them down (not that i get the sense alice gets out all that much either, but still). but i also know the overwhelming joy and relief that comes with finding someone whose germs you don't mind.

AND IT DRIVES ME CRAZY haha because i still don't really like peter! i think it's funny to bully him but also sometimes he does genuinely anger me. and it's been an odd experience to feel myself become more like him in this very specific way over the years, to relate to some of his fears and such. not to mention, i don't remember his germophobia being played as a joke all that much?

i mean there probably are moments where it is, i wouldn't be surprised, but comparing the way he's treated as opposed to, say, death the kid from soul eater... it feels different. [i could make a whole other post about my feelings on kid but i digress]

he's just a character that i personally have a lot of really complex feelings about, because on the one hand he can be a total scumbag who i hate, but on the other hand he seems to encapsulate certain struggles i've dealt with that i don't see illustrated in media very often. he's really important to me but also i want to kick the shit out of him ^_^

anyway. i don't think i really had A Point to all of this, just wanted to jot down some of my own ideas on him ig

#nkna #.txt #peter #honking #← hope it's ok to take inspo from ur thoughtful honking tag kam if u see this lol #it makes me smile and also i'm a bit of an aspiring clown so it feels thematically appropriate

[livecharliereaction]

Bye tsumihoroboshi

thats all for tsumihoroboshi chapter ZAMN. omfg i did cry i cant lie at that big battle on the rooftop i did i did i did.. It just hits a litte close to home friendship and all that... I love my friends so mach i get everything theyre feeling u know... AND the delusions of rena what a crazy writing style i dont think ill get over it like ever. urgh. Well the final tip almost wanted me to consider that "ooh maybe she was right!" but honestly my takeaways from it are juts 1. disaster happens regardless no matter how the events go otherwise 2. rika was murdered? Thats pretty weird 3. BUT theres hope liek she said BECAUSE: keiichi rememberd something from "another world" (i know a timeloop when i see one. its def a timeloop. Hells yeah) 4. the scrapbooks do hvae some evil spell or something takano i am onto you its weird anyway she shows up at such times and all.. Idk if shes the #MAIN VILLAIN DEMON OMG but shes Something.

Rena i love you thank you for solidifying your place as my favorite good time. argh every chapter so far is better than the one before it goes for this one too it does it does... Which is amazing implications for next ones... Lets hope they keep it up...

And keiichi i cant lie i do love you. I love you i love you i love you. Ughh. If i was still 16 hed have a big chance at going to that kinlist. But hes so gross so i wouldnt actually have added him then either!!! im unable to kin these days because EVERY GOOD CHARACTER EVER has Some Traits I Can Relate To Myself becuase i dont know something something human emotion something i am just like everyone else and everyone is just like me in the end and i love it. But yeah keiichi love the guy hes so #Power of Friendship #Protagonist. Im mentioning this cos i loved the girls from the start and still do but keiichi had to prove himself a little...

Yeah im curious about satoko now too i dont think i paid her enough mind i sort of ended up assuming shes #Normal but just super close to rika obviously but that one line about her being older. I couldnt tell yet if its Haha satokos body is older and rikas being funny! OR Omg satoko some immortal or something too woww! but yeah. I wouldnt think she is it doesnt seem that way at all BUT u never know w this fuckass series..ou ou ou ou ou

Mion i love you the girl that you are. Rena you are everything and more. Rika how have you managed to stay mysterious ive been here for like over 30 hours total for sure maybe even 40. But hmm

if its a timeloop i still cant tell what its about. id say rikas in charge (wants to keep giving this world a chance) n takano is with the antagonistic forces But how does it work exactly? If rikas the one "looping the time" directly it doesnt really compute unless she can do it from the afterlife. I dont konw.

And Omfg i hate this series because i STILL believe satoshi will show up one day. Even though it seems impossible now. But i liked him n shion so much dude i love shion so satoshi HAS TO come back for her. Urgh urgh urgh

But yeah i fr didnt think keiichi would be able to break renas delusion even for such a long moment But he pulled it off. Shes really cool i love her. I love her i love her i love her. UGHHH. Everything and more. and i said it alr but ill say it again the portrayal of her delusional state is SO personal to me i get her i get her i DO so good... Urghh. Ok. Thank u charhigurashi6 i have to check how many games the bundle i bought still has hmm

ok these 3 i own but havent installed lets see The first one here is um well i dont know that girl i havent seen her which is concerning! I feel like i mightve seen a sprite (in the og style that i read with) but thats kinda it. I recall seeing a name somewhere too shes a furude i think but not too sure Im always frustrated when i see a spoiler like that but then it never makes me any more knowledgeable about anything so so far its fine #LOL. proably has to do with the demon stuff tho...

takano in the middle one right takano you are so weird and offputting. Damn maybe she IS the big bad afterall

last one aww rika But yeah thats. I dont know its at least 5 hrs each but i think i spent like 10+ hrs on meakashi so it could possibly be up to like what. 15 even 20? per game. At least 15 hours left though.. Idt theres anything outside of the bundle after this its either higu anime time or umineko time ill see what kinda time i have then (i can probably watch the anime while multitasking i dont really care so much but umineko i want to be TUNED. IN.)

yay exciting ok thank u charhigurashi6 best chapter so far loved it love u rena love u everyone ok gn

#charhigurashi6

[servin-up-surveys]

survey #120

When was the last time you spent over $100 in one transaction? What did you buy? Uh... I don't remember? I'll do that soon though for my first tattoo appointment.

Do you sleep with a stuffed animal? Would you judge a grown adult for doing so? No to both.

Would you rather read an erotic novel or watch an erotic film? I mean, honestly neither, but if I had to pick one it'd be a novel.

Do you still have both of your parents? Thankfully, yes.

Do you play video games? Yeah, but not nearly as much as I did as a kid and teenager.

Does your significant other boss you around a lot? Hell fucking no, he knows I wouldn't allow that and I also know he doesn't want to do that to me.

Have you ever been put to sleep for surgery? Twice, yeah. I recently learned that I WON'T be able to be put to sleep for my wisdom teeth extraction because it is just impossibly expensive for us, and one especially HAS to come out because it has a very deep cavity that is going to kill the tooth and cause me hell if it stays in.

[TW: SUICIDE] Have you ever attempted suicide? Yes.

Have you ever skipped class before? No, not just one specific class. I'd rarely skip school by staying home, almost only ever because of mental health or more rarely being absolutely insanely tired, but Mom normally wouldn't allow that. Oh, I think I also usually did get to stay home on my bday.

Who, in your life, makes you feel discouraged? Myself, more than absolutely anyone else. I don't let (other) people stay in my life anymore that do that to me.

Have you ever lost anyone close to cancer? Well, my grandmothers died of different cancers, but neither I was very close to at all (I actually hated Mom's mom) for multiple reasons. Did Dad's dad die of cancer too? I can't remember, but I barely knew him either.

Have you ever been in a car accident? Yeah, when I was way younger. We actually got real close to big trouble on the road Friday; we were the first in line at a stop light and across from us, an 18-wheeler carrying some metal stuff turned in front of us, but way too sharply, and he tipped entirely onto two wheels, very barely managing to get back upright. Both Mom and I nearly had a fucking heart attack and both of our anxieties were very elevated for a while, like she was about to shift the car into reverse to back the hell up.

What was the last film you watched, that made you feel emotional? I have no idea. I basically never watch movies.

Does anyone you know ever recommend books to you? No.

What traits/behaviors do your pets have, that you find cute? Strongest is Cookie's tendency to get EXTREMELY excited when she merely suspects Mom or both of us are leaving. She is crazy for car rides, and she'll immediately start running between us, pushing our legs, doing this weird hyperventilation thing chihuahuas do when they get so excited their tiny bodies basically can't handle it haha, and will jump right into her carrier and stare at Mom, waiting to be picked up. Cookie also tends to prefer toys that are bigger than her, and watching her try to beat up like her big sloth or cow is the cutest shit. As for Roman, when we get home, he'll saunter into the living room and just plop down onto the floor in this uniquely content way, like he's just happy we're home and wants to chill with us. He stretches out and will frequently start rolling around/playing on the floor basically, lol. Also since being a kitten, he loves to sleep like as close to my face as he can get, normally. Lastly, Venus. This isn't exactly super unique to a snake, but it's still cute: when I handle her, oftentimes she loves to try to go into my shirt to be against my skin and stay warmer (I'm very convinced this literally saved her life once in a power outage we had), and back when I used to use my laptop in bed, she was great about snuggling up against me and just chilling there for basically ever, lol. She's a sweet girl.

Is there anyone who "likes" a lot of your posts online, but you don’t talk? Yeah, ig.

What was the last song that you recall singing along to? Pretty sure it was "Love Stuck" by Mother Mother the other day.

Have you ever been in your kitchen naked? No.

This time last year, what was your relationship status? I was still with Girt.

Did you reject or accept your last friend request? Reject, I think. Pretty sure it was some random guy I'd never met and had no mutuals with, gotta love those.

Are you sure of your sexuality? I AM sure I'm at least queer, and while I'm quite certain I am specifically pansexual, I don't think I'd ever truly know until I had a legit sexual experience with a feminine person.

What was the last compliment that you got? The person who worked with me for PT today told me I did great.

Do you know anyone with a really weird name? In almost all cases, I don't like to think of names as "weird," because generally they are given with great love and consideration and are important to those who named them, so I think it's pretty mean to consider someone's name weird. Now yes, there are exceptions, there are rare cases where names are given carelessly or even as a "joke," but generally, you get my mindset.

Has a boy/girl ever cheated on their boyfriend/girlfriend for you? Basically.

What’s the worst hangover you’ve ever had? I've never had one, actually.

Who in your family are you closest to? My mom.

Ever sat in someone’s lap because there were no more seats in a vehicle? I remember doing this with Jason once.

What do you tend to drink a lot of? Flavored carbonated water.

If you were going out for a meal, what restaurants would you typically AVOID going to? Seafood and foreign, generally. There are times I'm fine with some foreign food, but on your average day, if you ask where I wanna go, I'm gonna pick American cuisine.

Name a song you enjoy that’s in a language other than English. Basically Rammstein's entire discography lmao but for this question I'm gonna go with "Zeit," I think the vocals are fucking fantastic and sincerely beautiful in it. I feel like German has a rep for being an ugly-sounding language, which I don't agree with in general, but I cannot imagine someone calling the vocals "ugly" in that one.

Did you ever have head lice as a child? Quite positive no.

Do you like/listen to Queen? Do you have a favourite song by them? I adore Queen; Freddie Mercury is my favorite vocalist to ever live. This is probably like, EVERYONE'S answer, but I adore "Bohemian Rhapsody," but also "Killer Queen" and "Headlong" are high up on the list.

Do you have any idea when you’ll next attend a wedding? Whose will it be? Nope, but if I had to guess I really do think it's probably gonna be my own lmao. Girt visited his grandmother two days back and she's officially joined the party of asking when we're getting married haha.

What was the best job you’ve ever had? I've never had a job I even liked.

Do you have a troublesome medical condition? Above all, severe depression and anxiety. My AvPD is also very noteworthy with how it affects my life, and I still deal with the effects of relationship trauma. OH, I was so focused on my mental stuff that I almost forgot uh hey, my leg health also MAJORLY affects my life and what I can do, etc. Lastly, my weight plays a massive part in my poor self-image and super severely contributes to my depression.

Magenta, aqua, or coral? Coral; I consider that my second-favorite color. I love all of these, though.

Do you like the color orchid? Yes! I love basically every conceivable shade of pink, haha.

Would you rather be a wedding photographer or a nature photographer? It's my literal dream to be a nature photographer. Once upon a time I was aiming for wedding photographer, but only for the pay; I'm just not social enough for that shit.

Have you ever had an ulcer? None other than those you sometimes get in your mouth from like, biting your cheek.

Do you enjoy writing essays? I actually do, quite a lot.

What is your favorite name that starts with a "Z?" Probably Zane.

Do you believe that God’s plans for you are better than you could ask, think, or imagine? "God's" plan involves giving kids cancer and allowing pre-teen girls to be knocked up by rapists, fuck his "plans."

Would you want your first child to be a girl or a boy? If I decide I want children, I want a girl so much more than a boy that I'd almost be tempted to do IVF so long as my husband was still the biological dad, I've no idea how the rules of that process work. Super unlikely I'd actually do it though because I don't care quite enough to invest money in that.

Do you think you have what it takes to be a good salesperson? I've been in this position and I can ASSURE you I am the worst salesperson imaginable lmao.

Which name do you like better: Jessica or Jennifer? Jessica.

To you, what is especially distracting? People talking when I'm trying to count something. I physically cannot do it. Numbers just DO NOT store in my damn brain.

Have you ever contemplated cheating on anyone? Nope.

Who do you go to when you need comfort? Mostly Girt or Mom. Sometimes Tez and Mazzy.

Has anyone you know started a new job recently? Do they seem to enjoy it? Uh I feel like somebody has, but idr who.

Have you seen a butterfly at any time recently? No.

Have you drunk any fruit-flavored beverages today? Yes; the water I drink is usually strawberry-flavored.

What carbonated beverages do you have in your fridge at the moment? None, not even my aforementioned waters right now.

Has anyone you know got into a new relationship lately? Um maybe, idk.

Do you have any sisters? How is your relationship with them? Ashley, Nicole, Katie, and Misty. Katie and Misty don't live here and I barely ever see them, but I am A LOT like Katie (more than any of my other siblings) so connect to her a lot, though we don't talk enough. I like Misty enough, but she can also be incredibly fucking stupid and self-important as hell. I get along fine with Ashley and Nicole too, but we also don't talk a lot and I've never in my mature life known how to properly interact/connect with them. Nicole and I were very close as kids, but not anymore.

What was your favourite class in high school? Art.

Do you have any plans to buy any furniture in the near future? No.

Do you know anyone who has a matching tattoo with someone? (including yourself)? I'm sure I know more than I think I do. I know Ashley and her husband Nick got each other's first initial tattooed on their ring fingers on their honeymoon. Colleen and I each got "ohana" tattoos dedicated to each other (which I now want to rip directly off my fucking skin, especially when you consider I don't even believe in unnecessary loyalty to family just because they're family), but they were styled entirely differently and in different spots.

What type of milk do you like to drink? Either 1%, 2%, or whole.

Do you have a first aid kit at home? Yeah.

Are your parents dog or cat people? Is that different or the same as you? I know Mom's a dog person, and I think Dad is too. Since leaving us though he's never owned another, just cats because of Kim, and he's loved both of them very much.

Are there sounds that bother you on a visceral level? Vomiting.

Would you ever get a matching tattoo with someone? I will never, ever, get another tattoo that will lose meaning if that person leaves my life. It's a terrible fucking decision. I'm perfectly fine with getting one with somebody that will still be a perfectly relevant, important tattoo to me if our relationship spoils, though.

What would be worse for you, unplanned pregnancy or cancer? Gah, I guess cancer, but both would fucking suck. I'm pretty sure the abortion I would inevitably get would traumatize me, but cancer could straight-up kill me.

Have you ever popped another person’s zit? oh my fucking god no

Have you ever told a friend to dump their SO? Did they? Yes, and eventually, yes. She was my best friend and her boyfriend (who I knew via school) was an ABSOLUTE piece of shit. Summer's always had a thing for people who aren't good for her... Even now, her partner she's been with for many, many years is complete trash, but it really does look like they're staying together no matter what.

What do you think is the coolest piercing on someone else? Generally lip kinds.

#survey #surveys #random questions #personal questions

[witheringvoice]

Let Go, Give Up - A Poem

TW: Suicidal thoughts, desperate to end it, depressing shit like that.

I wrote this poem when I was in a really bad place mentally, ain't it funny this is only poem 27? Haha...I have so many to share, this was written last summer probably, I have no idea. Actually no, probably after last summer...I have no idea, but it's been a while since I wrote this poem...And um, doesn't mean I'm in a much better space, but I'm just...yeah. So many more to share! That's all I wanted to say...haha...

Also, a fly just scared the shit out of me lol

//

I can't do it anymore, I have no voice, no hope, no home, just pain.

I can't handle thinking, I need to be free but I can't do it!

It's impossible, it's always there whenever I'm weak.

It whispers to me, controlling me when it's best to strike.

I can't bear another strike though, it's too much to hand;e.

I need to do it, to escape, to finally breathe with no burdens.

It's beckoning me, luring me to its clutches.

But I can't, I don't really want to release my grip on the edge.

It's the only thing keeping me from the abyss and hurting those I love.

But how long do I have until they leave me like everyone else?

I'm a problem, a burden, a strain, but they come first.

I'm causing them too many problems though, they need to breathe, to leave me.

So I shouldn't care, I should just do it like I desperately want to.

Just let myself fall and be free.

I need to do it.

...I can't though.

Not yet.

Just a little, I'll hold on for a little longer.

Then maybe, later I'll do it.

Let go, give up.

// TW: Mentions of overdose, self-harm

Anytime I see a pill bottle, I get scared, or I stare at it, trying to resist the urge to swallow them all. Anytime I see something sharp, my brain sometimes leads to hurting myself. But I've never done either of those. I hate pills, someone I loved took anti-depressants with alcohol and went crazy, which made me get diagnosed with PTSD that event. My sister, she's overdosed at least twice now, and she's cut herself before. Same with one of my best friends, he's cut himself before too...I haven't. I tried once, with some tiny yet sharp piece of plastic. I scratch myself, I've done it close to bleeding, but I never have made myself bleed. That's good, right? I haven't...I haven't tried to end it yet, that should be good? But I'm not proud...Almost disappointed, but also not...Does that make sense? Going over this poem again hurts...Because not that long ago I had an urge to down a bottle of pills again...Fucking hell I hate this.

#tw vent #vent post #poem

[neobubz]

hi! I just wanna tell you that DEAR M IS LOSER JAEHYUN'S ERA. Lol kidding aside. I noticed that he was kinda stiff (idk if thats the right word) and that his actions are kind of awkward. The little twitch over here and there... some quirks i do when i feel awkward. He does that when he's not even at the center. Like you'll notice how awkward he felt at that moment. But dont get me wrong i love jaehyun sm. I just feel like he can do more if he's given a chance to star in another drama. ALSO he's a good kisser (on screen). I didnt gasp when i saw him raise his shirt and the camera zoomed in his abs bcos come on thats a normal occurrence in ncity. But ppl only talked about how he looked good (thats given GIVEN) and all stuff. I barely see any post on twt about his skills.

I appreciate that u asked this here bcos i have no one to talk to about these things aside from my non kpop friends whom i sent the link so they can watch using my account ahshshshajjaa they are all unbiased bcos they didnt know jaehyun or any nct members at all. my 2nd gen friends only knew kpop year 2012 below hahahaha

hi! omg thanks for messaging me! i was beginning to think no one had seen it lol

haha loser jaehyun era?! why does this make me laugh 🤣 like jaehyun + loser in the same sentence makes me laugh so much! a lot better than prince jaehyun...😑...hate that so much…

i figured he was going to be awkward. like idols in dramas/movies are to bring in the money and that's it. not because they have a natural god given gift for acting, which makes me feel so bad for them especially those who really want/wanted to act like when BTS' V was in that one historical drama like i knew how much he wanted to act and i was so happy for him (though i still haven’t watched it) and then people rained on his parade saying he sucked. like what do you expect an Oscar winning performance? it’s his first time. if he didn't suck and was good i’d wonder why he was an idol in the first place 😝

improvisation makes me think is something that might be good for jaehyun during those “i’m not the main focus” moments. i think lots of people well known or beginning should take improve classes every now and then to learn/refresh their skills! plus i think it would be super fun! sorta like what they did when they were the college students he’s pretty quick on his feet when people give him a chance to get his thoughts together; and witty too 😊

what you said about his twitching/quirks reminded me of that. i for sure (despite not having watched it) think if given more than one chance he'll be able to grow comfortable enough during those in between moments ^^

i'm like terrified for winwin and yuta's acting debuts. people who are fans of yuta seem to have all these high expectations but from the trailer i'm like "eh, reminds me of Gokusen but edgier" lol i love yuta but i'm expecting it's going to be him glaring daggers (which he's amazing at doing already), the typical japanese tough school boy/tough guy growl (idk how they do this when they talk but i secretly love it), then proceed into a fight scene where the camera work is about about a C+ where you can clearly see no actual physical contact happened 🤣 but this is such a great opportunity for yuta and it’s like FINALLY he gets a chance to shine on his own and for winwin...like winwin is secretly my spirit animal 😊 but i'm not expecting much from him. he doesn't really "emote/react" that much when around the nct members and with wayv (though i did see laughing, talking, etc. more) it doesn't make me think like 'yeah he's going to be a decent actor" but he looks like he's having so much fun and that's all i care about ^^ when you do something you love and have fun doing it you’re not actually “working” so winwin fighting!

eh? jaehyun a good kisser you say? 😏😉 may just have to check it out lmao like no joke i would only assume this guy is an amazing kisser like he just has to be! lol

right? these girls going crazy over jaehyun's abs…i mean it's not like when johnny performed an almost magic mike like performance out of the f-ing blue lol my brain went "eh?!!!!!!!!!!!" when i saw him but jaehyun showing his abs is like "what? else? i can look up his abs on goggle and find a tons of pictures"

i hate that people only talk about his looks…i'm not a super ultra mega jaehyun stan or anything (i have very little memory of his exsistence in 127 until he came out in the regular teaser in the business suit and even then i thought ‘yeah he’d be that guy in the office all the women want to f*ck’ 🤣 and that was it. but he is a complex human being who is more than just a pretty face. there are times where i feel like he wants to say something but stops himself or someone interrupts before he can get his words out. i feel bad for him at times and wish people would stop obsessing over his appearance (but that's just me)

ugh…twitter is just fanwars and people trying to get their favorite member to trend by doing these “appreciation posts” saying things like "thank you for giving me a reason for being able to live day after day. my one and only love (insert nct member name)" [legit just saw this in regards to haechan on twitter since his name was trending] like bish….?!!!! are you for real?! please tell me that you have other reasons for living day after day and not because of some idol you don't even know lmao

awwwwww absolutely! anything you want to talk about i'm always here! it’s so fun to talk to other kpop fans and though i love writing my stories i want to talk/gossip/fangirl with all of you guys! i have no one to talk to about these kinds of things in my day to day life (my besties are male who don’t give a sh*t about kpop) so it's nice to chat/share opinions 😊

if you want to spam me with pictures of your favorite NCT member idc. if you want to talk about someone not getting enough lines, or a song not being what you expected (STICKER!!!!! 😤) you can! or if you want to rant about fans being stupid and starting unnecessary drama i’m here for ya!

i'm an oldie i've been listening to kpop since about '08/'09 and the only problem with having listened to kpop for that long is I'M SUPER CRITICAL of all these new groups lol like if y'all don't impress me like people did in SNSD/BIG BANG/2NE1 etc. then yeah…not gonna listen to you at all until you peek my interest...plus i'm just legit getting old and they are debuting babies now... -_- 14 IS TO DAMN YOUNG!!!

#anon

[starfirette]

shadowhunter boys as boyfriends

GENDER NEUTRAL READER | I didn't put the TLH kids (Matthew, James, etc) because the series isn't over yet and as of right now, they're still, for the most part, on the older teenager side. I'll do a Shadowhunter Girls version soon because I need Jessamine and Emma content

Including the Herondales, Lightwoods, Magnus Bane, Jem Carstairs, The Blackthorns, and Kieran.

Herondale

William Herondale is a protective boyfriend, as well as a loudmouth. He thinks he's the best because he's got you. Probably compares you to the other significant others of his friends, in the sense that you're better than everyone else. "Please, you put so-and-so's outfit to SHAME last night" "Oh, so-and-so couldn't kill a sprite if they tried, you've singlehandedly taken down shax" "will, the shax put me in the hospital..." "who the hell took it down, then?" "that was you, dear" "oh, aha, yes that's right. Well, don't feel too bad about it, love". Please just shut him UP

Jace Herondale is the kind of boyfriend who acts like he's totally independent and doesn't need to spend all his time with you, when, in reality, he feels miserable when you aren't around. "Y/n would love this shirt." Alec would tell him to buy it for you. Jace would scoff. "How corny." Alec would say 'Fine, then don't get it.' Jace would keep talking about it until Alec purchased the shirt himself, forcing Jace to gift it to you. Of course, Jace acts like a cool guy about it. "It just reminded me of you, that's all..."

Lightwood

Gideon Lightwood is the childhood bestfriend to lover. You're the one he confides in about everything. He didn't even realize he'd fallen in love with you until your family was on the verge of marrying you off. Gideon would probably stay quiet, letting you go on with the arranged marriage, until everyone around him finally explained how awful that actually is, and you're probably in love with him, too. Once Jem pointed this out, Gideon practically jumped out the window to get to you. Luckily, Jem was right.

Gabriel Lightwood is the childhood enemy to lover. You're the one he hates, and vehemently swore to never be friends with. Well one summer, your family left for a vacation in Idris. You returned for the Autumnal Equinox, all tan and gorgeous, and Gabriel realized you're actually really hot. It all goes down hill from there. He would definitely have been drawn in by your looks at first--but he DOES fall in love with you for real.

Alec Lightwood would never tell you he likes you ever. He'd rather die than confess his crush. You weren't exactly his best friend, but you were more than an acquaintance. Good luck trying to drop hints that you like him, too, because he's too salty and emo to realize that you'd ever like him back.

Carstairs

Jem Carstairs........how can I possibly explain my love for this man? Jem is a perfect gentleman. Probably coerced into marrying you by Charlotte, for his sake of health and safety of status. She truly wants what's best for Jem. And you're a good match for him!!! In this case, arranged marriage but you two fall in love.

Bane

Oh, to be the lover of Magnus Bane. You probably met him in the most absurd of ways, like a crazy meet cute in a rom com. He spoils you, buys you gifts to win your affection; doesn't accept it when you tell him no more gifts. He just wants love. You two probably elope and forget to tell people until a month or so after it's happened. Maybe even a year later. "By the way, we're having a one year anniversary party and you're invited, Tessa."

"???? What?"

"Oh, haha, yeah, we got married one year ago! So we would like, like, a Kuerig or something."

Kieran Kingson

Kieran just straight up asks you to be his mate one day. It's a strange moment. it's the middle of breakfast, you're exhausted, and Julian won't stop bitching about the iPod you supposedly stole and then lost, when really you just borrowed it and broke it during patrol. Kieran comes in, sits down; he says his good mornings to the family. Then, "Oh, by the way Y/n. I'd like you to come out with me for dinner tonight."

The clatter of the morning stops as everyone pauses and waits to hear your response. He'd apologize in private but extend the invitation a second time. He wouldn't have an issue saying he's attracted to you and even has a crush. He's nice about it, and not at all awkward. You, however, are very awkward.

Blackthorn

Mark Blackthorn adores you. He approaches you in private. He's super dramatic about it, too. You thought he was going to tell you someone was dying. But no, he just thinks you are, in his words, "glowing with beauty". Okay dude. Just kiss me already. You would be the couple that's always making out or going at it. He cannot keep his hands off you.

Julian Blackthorn is the opposite. While he adores you just as much, he's calm and doesn't feel the need to go full throttle into marriage, like his brother would be. Julian wants to have one normal experience in his life. He wants to have a movie worthy relationship, with stolen kisses and first dates and awkward hand holding. He feels so comfortable with you.

#shadowhunter chronicles x reader #shadowhunters x reader #shadowhunters imagine #the shadowhuter chronicles #william herondale x reader #will herondale x reader #will herondale #jace herondale #jace herondale x reader #will herondale imagine #jace herondale imagine #jem carstairs x reader #jem carstairs imagine #jem carstairs #magnus bane x reader #magnus bane imagine #mark blackthorn x reader #mark blackthorn imagine #julian blackthorn x reader #julian blackthorn imagine #kieran kingson x reader #kieran kingson imagine #alec lightwood x reader #alec lightwood imagine #gabriel lightwood x reader #gabriel lightwood imagine #gideon lightwood x reader #gideon lightwood imagine #the mortal instruments x reader #the mortal instruments imagine