#maybe i gotta get away from that lol

[end-orfino]

It just all feels more pointless now. I think i lost some of the spirit. I dont know if its temporary or how to get it back

#found myself less passionate about my ocs and their stories and about making them real one day #but not in a good way #its not letting me go of my perfectionism or whatever instead its just like. whats the point. theyre not that good anyways #theyre as in the stories #im increasingly aware of the plot holes and the parts that are kind of held together with string in order to make the plot make sense and-- #--im not sure if anyone ever could get as passionate about them as i was? #especially since like. *i* dont feel as passionate abt them as i said. #my main baby my main oc project that i cherished and hoped to make real in some way now feels like i should keep it private. #the other one that i was hoping to make into my first long term project remains unfinished plot-wise and i dont feel motivated to work-- #--on it further #the one that i think has an alright plot that i could share is just kinda in the bg #and also i always felt like i was good at like...symbolism...metaphors...parallels...this kinda stuff #i felt like my stories were something you could dig into #now it feels like i overestimated them #and theyre actually painfully simple and just. idk. feels like theyre not that good #maybe its because i recently didnt have time to work on them? #and fell into a fandom that has a painfully not-deep story where i also often feel like other ppl in the community dont want me there #maybe i gotta get away from that lol #but it doesnt feel like its gonna help. idk what will. #all of this isnt giving me any relief its just making me feel empty and like i thought too greatly of myself #bcs i still want to Make things and stories and now i just feel like im lacking at that??

[charmac]

DUDEEEE pls more dennis pov ive seem posts of u saying its gonna be macs pov for a while but omfg i loved the chapters where its dennis’ so bad

It's not that I don't enjoy it, but that I think the audience being in Dennis' head too much is... a little dangerous. Sometimes I write stuff from Dennis' POV and then re-write it from Mac's (the beginning of Chapter 9, for example, was originally Dennis' POV).

So, it's unfortunately more of a narrative decision on my side to keep out of there. There's is always potential to go back, it's just trickier for me (and more spoiler-y for you) to give Dennis' perspective on things. How do you build angst if the reader is aware of both sides! I have yet to figure that one out, but the night is still young.

#sugar daddy au #ask #*looks through my 'outline'* #so i can give you dennis pov maybe chapter 16 earliest #bc i do have a dennis pov scene written for that #but i was planning on rewriting it from Mac's pov lol #cos i also have a mac pov scene for that chapter #though those scenes could be broken up between chapters.. #the struggle... #btw my chapter outlines are like 1-3 words and then that becomes 20k words #nightmarish #also any chapter they fuck for real i gotta write from the top so tha too limits things #dont worry in chapter 33 we'll get back to dennis #thats a joke its more like chapter 20 #hey thats not too far away #ok back to writing #i am struggling to get a scene right in this chapter rn if you cant tell im procrastinating

[teufelme]

You ever just want to talk about Bertl,

#i . ooc . #The tags got so long just warning U now! #OK I know his appearance wasn't the longest but like. I'll never stop talking about him because he doesn't get enough credit? rip. #I know it's not really relevant any more because post-timeskip everyone is a lot better but. Referring to everyone's skill as of pre. #Reiner said Bertolt was the strongest of all of the shifters but he held himself back. He came 3rd without giving his all. Or really trying #I hc he held himself back to try not to let too much of his strength show bc people forget he had military training b4 joining the 104th. #And ofc. Also to not bring too much attention to himself bc of who he really is??? #The way he mastered his Titan straight away and also has such a good handle on it. #Out of the 3 shifters he was the one that stayed true to the mission. Despite his reluctance he's got the strength and commitment. #People are so quick to say he relies on Reiner too much. And while he does at times. Reiner relies on him just as much if not more. Even if #Reiner doesn't realise it. Bertolt keeps him on track and has no one supporting him at all. #In COTT arc... U see him dodge Mikasa who is an Ackerman and seen as one of the strongest characters in the series... #And the same in RTS. Everyone gets too distracted by Mikasa to actually pay attention to how he dodges her 4 times?? Even tho she attacks #from behind? And the way he lands a hit on her. I just *screams*. I love how many times she tries to kill him. lol #How effective he is when he abandons his guilt and this is sort of irrelevant but. It's so special to me because as someone who is #a quiet person irl round people I don't know well. Who has it brought up a lot. I just adore when a character that remains in the #background just comes out and says enough is so hhhhh I know his reasons aren't good BUT RTS BERT... AH. #Also gotta talk about his marksmanship skills in a thread at some point?? Maybe Mp bert I J UST.. #Anyway I might do a cheeky revamp of graphics n icons and that. Dunno yet. Need to actually write that'd be good lol. #This account is a lovebot didn't U know.

[sysig]

PinkBlueSpam anon I am still thinking of you *blows you a kiss 💕*

#I am also feeling a mite impulsive atm so here have a kind of cleaned art of they #WIP #Deltarune #Pink Addison #Spamton #Blue Addison #I have made two separate minis about this idea now and I don't know which one to go with lol #Ngl I am strongly considering a stream in the near-ish future maybe that will get me to sit down and focus and pick one lol #The paper version turned out way longer and therefore goes a little more in depth on the dynamics but hrmmnnn #I'm irritated with how long I spend on digital in general but also this one specifically only to end up scrapping it lol #I need more practice! Rather I need practice on the committing part #I'm a machine during Requestober but that's because there's a time limit :/ My own projects aren't so lucky #I have - so many scratch comics that have been wasting away in the backlog for literal months hhhhh #Drawing on paper is so much faster but then there's the Editing and just jfkdlsafdsfsd #Don't mind me lol I just want to make way faster than my skill allows - I want to be fast /and/ pretty but I gotta pick one >:0 Rude! #Doesn't stop me from thinking about it A Bunch lol #They've crossed my radar again and if it weren't for all the Editing in my backlog I'd be drawing them So Much #Hhhhhhhhhhh where are the corners I can cut what can I do to just Make a bit more and spend a little less time on the Prettifying #I just wanna make!!! Til it's all out of my head!!! All of it!!!

[ijustdontlikepeople]

may I ask how you did this edit? it's a beautiful effect and I'd like to replicate it (only if you don't mind sharing, of course). tumblr.com/ijustdontlikepeople/739905108314324992

Hi anon! Thank you!! I’ve always been very fond of this guy and I am always happy to talk about making stuff!

It’s been a little while so my memory of the process is a little blurry and unfortunately, I cleaned out my project storage last week so I can’t go back layer by layer anymore but here’s the best of my memory

So, it started when I saw this base image and Davo looked very “heavy is the head that wears the crown” and I loved it

I brought it into PicsArt on my phone and cropped it so he was a bit more centered.

I went through the PicsArt stickers for an “orb” or “light burst” this is the one I used

To place the orb behind Davo like I wanted I added in another layer of that original photo, and removed the background until I just had Davo’s head

They should be layered original photo, burst, head, like above. Now you can see some spots in his hair and such that the orb light is not visible through so you go back through and erase bits of the Davo head layer. you don’t have to be too too particular about it bc the same photo of him is underneath.

If I remember right, the brightness of the orb wasn’t as high as I wanted so I doubled up on the same sticker

I think I one was centered over his left eye and then the other a few inches above it, and the i placed them both back behind the head layer again

Then added a sticker halo

Then I moved over to lens flare

I picked a light orangey one and placed one over his eye, lining it up with his Iris, then blending it with the light setting and duplicating the the layer and repeating for the other eye. I could have sworn that I gradually erased the edges so it faded into the rest of the photo but the software isn’t giving my an option to erase? So I’m not sure if that’s a change on their side or if I’m misremembering

From there, you apply and then go to FXs. (I may have tinkered with some color levels last time before this step but I don’t remember)

I’m not sure exactly which filters I used. I feel like there were two or three. I am about 80% sure I used these with roughly these specifics.

His face is cut out of PLRD which is done first than VINYL

So they didn’t turn out exactly the same but this about the gest. It’ll all be a little different depending on your starting photo. If you ever have any questions or just want to talk about what you’re making, my DMs and ask box are always open! I can give u my discord too if that’s easier! I hope this was a least a bit helpful!!

#actually know that I’m thinking about it maybe it was just one orb #behind his head to be like the light from the halo #that I turned the saturation up really high on #I remember struggling to get the color to stand out #but this time with the two it almost too much color without really do anything extra 🤔 #nonnie #Annie.resp #Edit Talk #McJesus Edit Breakdown #it is bothering me that I can’t get them exactly the same #I may mess with this more and update you if I figure it out #but I got do some work now #so gotta break away #his face probably had a bit of blur and color to make it so pink #I wonder if I went back over the first fx with just his face but lighter and less blur than the rest of the photo got the first time hmmmm #nope nope gotta go to work #already spent an hour and half on this lol #I think that’s probably more than the originally making it 😭

[deathxproof]

hm, out of all of the things I was expecting when I slowly started putting myself back in fandom spaces, “unresolved trauma from being an autistic kid/teen who was always perceived as Too Much” wasn’t on the list, to be quite honest.

#ooc ! #maybe I’ll unpack this more on my personal blog later. Who’s to say. not me certainly. #but yeah the amount of friendships/relationships I had from like. elementary school to high school(to even some of college) #where like. it’s suddenly revealed to me incredibly late that I’m being seen as overbearing / overwhelming / needing or being Too Much #and by then there is no fixing it yknow. by then they’re just telling you to get you to fuck off (or telling other people and not you lol) #(that happened way more often in online fandom spaces)(but tbh my hang-ups in online fandom spaces) #(come WAY MORE from like. interactions with Very Particular People) #(who self-admitted to like. actively trying to dig up dirt that didn’t exist on people ‘just in case’.)(or if they just didn’t like someone #(they aren’t around here anymore but nevertheless the few times we interacted and they tried that w me made me paranoid for ages </3333) #ANYWAYS if you read this far: hiiiiiiiii #i’m doing fine but oh god the weird nostalgic loneliness of being That Kid really hit me all at once #I’m still so bad at making friends now because of all of this naksdak #like I have to put effort into keeping up with people or else I’ll accidentally hold myself back / kind of isolate #under the assumption of like ‘oh you don’t want to scare this person away do you? you don’t want to be overbearing right?’ #and it’s like. hey. hey brain. hey bitch. we gotta talk to people to actually form relationships with them. that’s how this works. #vent #anyways I gotta go build a closet now ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ...

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

#yesterday i was wandering around the campus where ive resided these last 4 years bc ive banned myself from running until my leg heals #and i was thinking like. what am i gonna miss about this place when i leave? bc im always thinking abt the things i cant wait to get away #from. and its a real short list. ill miss the palm trees bc i never get sick of seeing thrm. theyre so weird #ill miss the yucca. again bc theyre so weird looking. ill miss the way u can see where all the ants r bc in the non human populated areas #there isnt grass everywhere bc desert. ill miss that there r so many birds of prey hanging around. and the road runners and all the lil #lizards. and maybe in an abstract way ill miss being so close to the boarder bc when u live near a boarder boarders feel like bullshit #like staring down the road into another country. idk theres something i like abt that. ill probably also miss being able to run outside #all year long bc in the winter during the day all u need is a light jacket lol. where im going it gets real cold 🥶 #maybe ill even miss the constant blue skies. but idk ive always liked a cloudy sky better. makes me think of home haha #ill def miss how convenient my apartment rn is. the loft bed. the low cost. the 5min walk to campus. sigh. but thats pretty much it. i #dont think ill miss anything else. im not really close with anyone. my boss was the reason i came here and she left this school in January #so thats it i guess. i think i stayed a year too long and was not well for a lot of my time here but so it goes #just gotta move to the next place. just gotta pray pray pray that i find an apartment soon. i dont even wanna say anything abt it bc im #afraid to jinx things. even tho thats irrational. like. i just gotta somehow project how good a tenant i am. im so quiet u will never see #me and i never complain abt anything bc i have brain problems. sigh. i cant wait for this transition to b over #im so so so ready to be in a new place doing new things. but at least my energy is back. im back to high energy on little sleep lol #i dont understand how my body functions lmao. somehow when i get a normal amount of sleep it's a sign that i feel awful #unrelated

[klolita78]

So I made alex in koikatsu and they don’t really have normal overalls or overalls with a short shirt so I tried the no shirt  And I feel like his allure would perverted in game if he wore this.

#degrees of lewdity #alex the farmhand #Gotta put his tiddies away #Too powerful #I wish I could make him wider but no clue how lol #Feel like tattoos and chains would be small things he'd do differentiate himself from his siblings #would probably get another tattoo maybe

[theamazingannie]

Fun thing about cleaning my room is I’ll find something I was using like a week ago buried deep under my bed in a pile of old receipts and candy wrappers and then also find something I haven’t seen in MONTHS like right there sitting exposed on the floor

#don’t understand this #Im so close to getting this room the most organized that it’s been since I moved in a year ago #but i gotta clean the junk out from underneath my bed and somehow that’s worse than everything else I’ve done #all motivation i had last week as disappeared this week #but i got a new shelf set up to put stuff that was laying around the floor on #i got my books all neatly lined up on the bookshelf I’ve had for months but had only put random junk on instead #got my earrings all sorted and put away except the ones missing their twin #which are set aside until they are matched #finally hung up my whiteboard calendar and got the dates down #not that I have anything going on I really need a calendar for lmao #but It’s magnetic so i departed it with some magnets and now I actually have some decoration in here aside from my eras poster #all my clothes are organized and anything I don’t wear is put in bins for me to shove against the wall #until they can hopefully one day be put in storage #for me to have when I hopefully one day move out and actually have use for party clothes #after a whole year of being in this room it actually feels lived in rather than just a storage room with a futon #It’s still half a storage room but it’s also now half me #unfortunately my shelf is cheap and the hooks can’t bare the weight of my jackets even with gorilla tape #so this weekend I gotta try to figure out what to do about that #need something stronger to support the weight #or maybe just more gorilla tape lol #anyways not that anyone is reading this but it is 3am and I can’t sleep so I decided to clean #but i think I’m just gonna read #or maybe play the sims #or maybe continúe to sit ln the floor mindlessly scrolling through tumblr

[todayisafridaynight]

maybe if i play y7 ill be normal <- played y7 four times this weekend, a decidedly not normal thing

#snap chats #'snap how many times can you play y7 in a week before youre tired of it' do you wanna find out together #i had a horrible night last night. ok not a WHOLLY horrible night but something trash did happen and i woke up still groggy bout it #i dont like sulking about the past but sometimes i cant help it and it aint fair to myself to act like i can help it. sometimes. #i gotta be candid just for my sake last night i got real upset with my friend because when i say she tests me She Really Does #and i hate getting angry cause then i just feel like my mom and at that point i figure itd be better if i slipped on ice and broke my spine #generally im good at controlling my temper but everything just testing me and i broke down and it was embarrassing as hell ☠️☠️ #so yeah thats gonna bother me for a few days LMAO #'snap it aint that deep' it AINT and thats why its so annoyin cause i KNOW it aint that deep yet i still cant argue away how i feel #all i can do is try to ignore it... like plying y7 for the 11th time..... #i cant ply it now tho i told myself id work on a commission a bit so. maybe later... #i already started another file yesterday- or was it two days ago ???? idk i just know im up to chap 5 in it #chap 5 always give me a damn headache its so LONG at the very least the benefit to having my friend over and raising my blood pressure #is that i start to remember things to do from a y7 speedrun. like i dont hound her on what to do obvi i just let her play #its just lil notes to myself. tho she does tell me to give her tips and exploits when i can LMAO #anyways.. im gonna go work ig and try to feel like crummy bye bye #i wanna stream.. maybe i will this evening before my evening class.. lol.. we'll see but probably not

[munamania]

:( i looked her spotify again and she’s been listening to love songs. sorry for making myself miserable on purpose. again

#slamming my head into a wall. guys idk why im apologizing like it’s my own feelings being hurt #but it’s so hard trying to get over her. this fucking blows #i know it’ll take time to not care. and distance and time away from her will help. and i should consider maybe #unfollowing her on stuff even tho i don’t want to like cause drama or whatever. but yeah. just um. having a sad day :( #i wish i did not do some of the things i did this semester. and i wish i wasn’t so attached to this idea of us. and i wish it was easier #live laugh love. <3 #abby talks #ig it wouldn’t be that dramatic it just kind of sucks now having a bunch of mutual friends. gotta prioritize me tho #probably a Making breakfast together moment #<3 lol.

[bo0zey]

i’m scFfredscsfed scatsdww scared

#i just wanna embrace my mania but i have work in 4hrs n i barely slept over the last 4 days n pulled an all-nighter last night #like ik it’s not smart to work a 12hr shift without sleep but Fuck i just wanna!! b awake!! #actually i’m lying down in the dark rn n it’s kinda making me sleepyish #but now i’m worried my body will want to catch up on +56hrs of zero sleep n i’ll sleep thru my alarm uvhhhh #i had work yesterday and did surprisingly well despite the all nighter i pulled ?? #i got all my IV sticks!! n im getting better at burping the saline bags!! #my only issue is i’m kinda slow but idk i just get caught up talking w the patients or their families #like i like spending time w the kind ppl and joking with them and taking the time to help educate them abt their ailments #but i work i the ED so i gotta pick up the pace!! but also manic me loooooves chatting n that’s where i fell kinda short yesterday lol #but a pt’s grandma was so genuinely grateful for me taking the time to explain everything we were doing to help her grandson #she said ‘god bless you’ and her genuinity was real i felt she truly meant it #she even said ‘and god bless the woman who put you here on this earth’ n i was like #;-;tyvm i’m actually here doing this bc of my mom!! she passed away when i was 16 n the woman said a little prayer jsut basically telling #god to Reallh watch over me n im not religious at all and i hate god but my mom was v religious n i have no problem w others beliefs #but idk i was really touched i guess like wow maybe i’m not that annoying/horrible of a nurse bc i’m kinda unprofessional when i talk? #i just like to make light out of things to help pt’s feel heard and validity and i want them to know i care and want them to feel as safe #w me as possible during the #time they’re in my care #ik i probably just should’ve been a psych RN from the start but i rlly felt a calling to the ED?? #also there’s a Lot of psych in our ED sooo 2 birds 1 stone !! #also the grandma told me she really appreciated how i spoke with them so openly and teach them things abt their loved ones condition #she said ‘never change that. your soul is beautiful and one of a kind’ or smthin like that n it was incredibly validating to me #cuz i felt like an idiot talking so much or maybe explaining things more than they wanted to know?? but the o grandma was soo appreciative?? #i know i need to practice reigning myself in but with certain patients it’s just so easy to see them as another human being than a body #ok i’m kinda tired now but i’m fuxk dd bc if i fall asleep i’ll o my get 2.5hrs MAX n imsooo scared of not waking up on time!! #ok ok okimvinn finn big gonna go #ramblings

[sanchoyo]

general lil life update!! trying to refill my queue the past 2 or 3 days so it actually seems like I'm Online, despite still kinda bein on an Internet Hiatus in general lately. but! I felt very productive today out of nowhere and was able to clean, journal, work out and cook a bit after like 2 weeks of not being able to do much bc Sick (which, I need to go to the dr about, but have been piddling on for a few reasons...) so that random burst of energy felt super nice! also its rainy out so that def is a mood booster. my dog and I sat on the porch and just enjoyed the rain together this morning and that was super sweet 🥺 I just took him and my journal and a blanket and we cuddled and I wrote down a couple recipes and stuff <3 I ended up starting a new journal thats different from my regular one that I treat as a diary and. I realize carrying 3-4 notebooks everywhere is EXCESSIVE probably, but also, it's SO FUN. I'm really grateful to be able to have journaling as my low-effort creative outlet lately while I haven't been able to draw or write much ;w;

hope u guys are doin okay too!

#sanchoyorambles #also I had some kind of strawberry frenzy earlier in which my mom bought a container of strawberries #not a small container! #and I ATE THEM ALL IN ONE SITTING LIKE AN ANIMAL #THEY WERE SO GOOD. SO SWEET #anyway i will end up dragging myself to the dr next week maybe depending on like #how much i have left from vet appointment on tuesday #feels like ive been waiting a MONTH for his appointment then i realize. yeah i kinda have lol #ill be glad when thats over too OTL. him being old makes me nervous anytime we gotta take him #im sure itll be fine but . i worry . anxitea #just also mildly worried ill drag myself to the dr and pay exorbitant lab fees or whatever only to hear back #'oh we dont know whats wrong lol'...since all the symptoms seem so random n unrelated when i list them out #i have my own personal theories but doctors do not like to hear those ive learned #so i will probably keep them to myself #even tho i think im Right #and the dr i have to go to is the one who told me it was just HORMONES when i was severely low on vitamin d and had had mono... #like...ok king... #not gonna put much faith in u...but i would kinda like some tests if possible to figure out if im right #i will feel vindicated then possibly see if like. i can have smth to fix it. if possible... #or at least get meds to manage it since uhh. been goin on for a few yrs now dont think its gonna go AWAY #but would be nice to hear its real and treatable in some way from a professional yknow

[orcelito]

Nothing like a work week with no days off & a boss that's terrible at communication to make you reaaaaally really really wanna punch something

:)

#speculation nation #negative/ #i guess. #im just so fed up with the whole situation. today was supposed to be my day off but i worked 3.5hr anyways #'voluntarily' but ugh #at least i have basically two days off at the start of next week. so i just gotta get through two more days of this bullshit #i dont have money to spend on food but i really want to buy something #really want chipotle. but i dont want to go out of my way to get chipotle. #wish i had some Fucking money. but nooo everything has to be so fucking expensive #technically i have money but with rent approaching i Cannot spend it lol #im so fucking sick of my life. i want to be graduated from college and done with this shit already. #but unfortunately i have Perpetually Fucked Up Brain disease! #and also chronic fatigue that mixes terribly with having to work during school #i just do not have the privilege of being able to go to college without working at the same time #if i did then maybe id have been done with it Years ago lmao #and i cannot. i Cannot. do school full time while also working just under full time. #i tried it. many times. and i blundered it so many times. #and it made me. Without Fail. entirely and completely miserable. #part time school while working is the only way i can make this work. chipping away at collehe while trying to keep my head above water #but oh i am absolutely full of envy for people who can just focus on school. who dont have to work too. #must be fucking nice to have loaded parents and/or a properly working brain that lets you get shit like scholarships #must be soooooooo fucking nice. #lmfao i need to just go home. take a nice shower. maybe make some ramen. and then fucking chill. #if anyone tries to fucking bother me about work im going to Snap.

[thenightshiftcomic]

Dying of Can't Show People Art Yet-itis

#I'm so used to throwing art at people the second it's done #this'll be an adjustment lol #especially because I gotta. uh. not do that maybe #I mean I could?? #idk #I wanna stack up a few updates first but from there ig we'll see what helps the most #because I like posting stuff right away because then I can ride the motivation #but then when the motivation falters getting back on track is harder #y'know? #so #idk we'll see #then again I'll probably keep doodling the guys in the background n stuff #and I got that last bit done literally via the tiniest bit of motivation I received from sneak peek response lol #so again! we'll see! idk! #learning how to work with your brain is hard!

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

#i was supposed to spend the last 2 days prepping and relaxing for the start of this big project tomorrow #but ive spent thr last 2 days frantically coding as fast as i could and focusing v hard to get a lot of bullshit done #and ive fixed things since yesterday. the changes i had to make were too too bad bc the thing that went wrong was so fucking weird #but it should be okay by tomorrow. knock on wood. but this does mean ive done fuck all to prep for tomorrow #so we r winging it bby. ugh. just gotta fucking pray that everything goes ok. pls let nothing b broken and let everything seal properly 🙏 #i was also supposed to meet with my boss today. probably for her to make sure i dont fuck up this project but apparently their safety hood #was having an emergency... whatever that means. so im sure shes having a week as well. and im free to fuck everything up for everyone #ugh. im so. theres a certain point in burning out where youre not really in pain anymore. you dont really feel anything all your joy and #hope dissolves away and u just exist to be useful. and i feel like its easier to maintain that than trying to b happy #i do not advise that bc its a fucking miserable. wasteful way to live but i dont really have time to try for anything better #god. i really hope my measurements friday dont take a full 8hrs. i dont know if i can handle that. literally i would have stay intensely #focused with my brain being Interrupted every 5min so i can manually record data points. its gonna b agony #so that fun. but maybe it wont. maybe itll be great and fun and ill have a wonderful time. seems unlikely but ya never kno #lets not think abt the fact that having to rush all this is preventing me from being able to do all thr other bullshit i need to get done #to prepare for the future. future? what future? hard to imagine from the bottom of this pit im digging myself #sigh. in a few months i can leave this place and never come back. soon but not soon enough #lol i was literally crying listening to cold play earlier bc idk thats the type of music my parents would put on at parties in summertime #so it evokes a v specific mood. which is i guess me hiding away from ppl at parties haha #back when i didnt have to worry abt things so much and i could just listen to the frogs chirping and watch the fireflies #oh god. now my boss is asking if i reached out for help tomorrow. no. lady i would rather drink bleach than have to direct an undergrad #tomorrow. its 10pm im fucking tired. just let me be sad. did i reach our for help? no my brain is on fire #tomorrow is gonna b a long day ugh #unrelated