The guests in Sam’s bachelor/bachelorette party and MC’s bachelorette party show just how truly dislikable these two are.
Sam: their estranged brother, some random guy who isn’t even a friend, and their ex who they cheated on and left at the altar
MC: her “best friend” who has shown to never actually be a friend, her coworker who hooked up with said best friend on MC’s desk, and some random woman MC isn’t friends with
Sam and MC are so obsessed with each other that they don’t make time to build meaningful friendships with other people. They have no real friends and rely on people who they have hurt and have been hurt by in return
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If you didn’t know, I’m a seasonal trail worker. This season I was placed on a crew that has the worst case of bad luck I’ve encountered. Here’s everything bad that happened this season:
Not enough work (x5 hitches)
Broke 3 tools in one day (and then some more)
Ran out of work supplies
Driving all day in no 4-wheel drive van (then stuck for four hours)
Boredom
Flat tire (x4)
Disabled crew (tumor, diabetes, asthma)
No water
3 mile hike every day (x3) (x1 in sand)
Throwing up straight water
Not drinking water all day (x3 at least)
Meltdown evac
Forgot stove
Forest cops having unclear rules (move tents 3 times)
Stuck in the sand (x3)
Heat
Drenched/hailed on
Upset stomaches (x15 approx.)
Sand. Sand. Sand.
Hit and run
Food poisoning
Forgot a bunch of back-country stuff (soap/bleach, tortillas, etc.)
Fucking bear hang (3 hours at least, branch broke)
Blisters (xidk)
Broken whisper lite
Deep axe cut (too late for stitches)
Almost t-boned an old woman
Clogged up/diarrhea
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One of the most memorable interactions was Saturday. Into our booth strolls a small family, tempted by free samples of freshly brewed tea. We chatter and give them the spiel, that the tea is character merch and we’re a cozy health-based app called Forage Friends.
The young girl zeroes in on our pride pins.
“They have my pin!” She says excitedly. “They have my flag!”
The dad blinks. He is surprised, but also calm and positive when he sees it’s the lesbian flag. “Oh. That’s… different from what you told me.”
“That was months ago, dad.” And she rolls her eyes. Definitely a teenager.
I turn to him and say, “Yeah, dad.” And we share a little laugh about it.
He says, “No, it’s great. That’s amazing, honey. It was just news to me.”
“Well, I guess I just decided to stop lying to myself. About liking guys. Like right now.”
A little lesbian just came out to her dad and he was super cool about it.
I’m standing there in my tie-dye mask and my cheery blue apron pouring tea and making small talk and I’m trying really hard not to cry or compare it to my experience, the fire & brimstone, the disgust, the conditional acceptance as long as I never bring it up.
So as this beautiful bonding is going on, the girl’s even younger brother turns his gaze around. He’s in a snorlax hoodie and bored and wants to go look at the swords across the hall. But on the other side of our booth….
“WHY DO PEOPLE DRAW THAT?” He asks loudly, and we all turn to our neighboring booth.
Our neighbors were extremely lovely people. Every time we had a break we would talk, and we became good friends over the weekend. They kept apologizing that their booth was next to ours and we kept repeating that it was totally fine. Their booth was great. I even bought their merchandise.
The thing that was so contentious, that they felt the need to apologize for, was that they were selling explicit titty hentai stickers of popular characters. They were censored with little yellow R18 labels but the content was very clear.
So back to the family: I freeze and immediately go somewhere else to let dad handle this question. With adult customers I’ve been loud and positive about our neighbors. (“Man, how has it been boothing next to them?” It’s been great! They bring a lot of foot traffic and they’re kind and wonderful professional neighbors. If anything it’s a fun juxtaposition. We believe in artistic freedom. I bought a sticker too!)
But this is a kid, it’s not my place to explain anything…. But I was extremely curious about what this chill dad would say.
“Well,” dad says with a long measured silence between each word. “Sometimes people are horny.”
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