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moving-asfateentertwines · 1 year

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Home

Spider was never meant to find Home

He knows that. No matter what Kiri whispers to him, what Lo’ak insists when the young warriors of the Omatikaya attempt to chase him off, or what Neteyam mumbles when Neytiri whips around with venom on her lips - he knows it, because if it were wrong, it would mean that everything that’s happened was for no reason. He can’t go that route, and so Home is just a concept he’ll never know

His siblings tempt to sway him many times over the years - they feel so much like Home it hurts, but he’s not so selfish to risk it for them when he knows he already took it from their mother

He’s seen his father in the photos the scientists don’t know he has, video logs that show a man that’s only been a horror story his whole life

But what scares him is he sees himself

He sees his eyes, the scowl when he’s angry, the cinch in his brow. He scowls at the image and sees his own face stare back.

So yeah. He doesn’t have a home. He has siblings though, and that’s more than he deserves. So Spider is okay. Really, he is.

But then his Dad shows up

—-

Quaritch is everything he thought he’d be and…not.

He’s angry. The man is full of hate and a need for revenge. He destroys the ground beneath his feet and spits on the life that’s surround them. He doesn’t know Ewya but he hates her none the less.

But he’s protective. Possessive of what’s his (and yet another damn thing he got from his father) and it seems Spider is included in that

He hates it but a part of him feels protected - it’s safe in the that’s holding a poison blade is. He’s one slip up from hell

But hell was bridgehead. It was the feeling of his deepest parts being pried out and displayed like the pages of a storybook

No one cared as they saw some of his best and his darkest days.

No one cared when the whips came out. When he bled so much he worried it was fatal

No one cared when he starved, when the distant sound of wildlife made his stomach twist with need.

Except Quaritch.

Quaritch snuck him food, bandaged his back, and pulled him down.

His hands may have delivered some of the blows or his lips produced the words to trigger nightmares but he cared.

Love is complicated, but he knows his Dad loved him

He thinks he may have too

Quaritch saw him.

He didn’t know. He thought he did but he didn’t but he wanted to he knows he did -

Then Neteyam almost dies. No one came for him. They left him, gave him up, except his brothers didn’t

Neteyam and Lo’ak fought for him.

They risked their lives when they had the chance to get away

Spider pieces his home together after that

Home finds him in the nights after when he rests with Kiri on his shoulder and Lo’ak’s hand loose in his grip. Tuk is curled into her mothers chest and Jake stands a silent guard at the door. Neteyam is flat on the bed of one of Ronal’s medical tents. His brother has been asleep for a few hours now with Norms assistance, but his family is too afraid to leave his side

He’s been awake the whole time. He hurts in ways he didn’t know he could until his capture but the warmth of his closest friends is too precious to loose right now. Still, he can’t sleep. Adrenaline is running under his skin and anxiety is inching up his throat. Jake is outside, safe and strong, but his tracker could lead the rest of the sky people here again, never mind Norms tempering, or his memories could have a clue, they had to be recorded, or -

Jake lays a large hand on his shoulder.

He jumps and a scared gasp escapes his throat before he processes the subtle differences. The thinner fingers, callouses Quaritch hasn’t had time to form yet, the gentleness.

“You need to sleep, Kiddo.”

Spider shudders and bows his head. “I will, just…can’t. I’ll go lay down in a few hours. When they’re okay.”

He can practically hear Jake roll his eyes. “I’m here. You’re safe, they’re safe. You need to sleep, Son.”

They both freeze, blood cold and eyes wide, as the silence envelops them.

Then, of course, Lo’ak snores and the moments gone. Jake laughs softly and suddenly exhaustion is pulling at his eyelids. A cushion slides behind him and a hand gently lowers him down.

“Sleep.”

The pieces come faster after that.

He cries with Kiri for hours. Laments his father, spills everything he felt. She’s the first one he tells the truth too. She knows more than he thinks anyone else ever will

He tells her Quaritch is alive. He tells her its all his fault.

She cries, yells, and then they just lay there. She tells him how scared she was of her mother. How lost she felt without him there.

He looks at her as she cries and another puzzle piece slides into place

Lo’ak and Neteyam came together when they came back for him, but it doesn’t feel settled until later.

They’re on their ilu with Spider behind Lo’ak as they race out to meet Payakan. He’s giant and beautiful and damn terrifying, but Lo’ak describes him as his soul brother. An extension of himself and a badass of a friend. They tell him how Payakan saved them. How he helped get Spider home

He’s scared and excited and now sure what to make of the beast, but then Lo’ak is leaving him on the ilu and falling into the water

He rises on a fin the size of a small marui with a loud whoop that can’t help but make Spider laugh in astonished awe

“Paya, meet my other brother, Spider.” Then a wave of water is splashing over him as Lo’ak laughs in a way he hasn’t heard since the forest

His breath leaves his lungs as he laughs and laughs, happy for more reasons than one. Neteyam meets his gaze from across the surf and smiles then one quick nod. He holds his gaze and feels the warmth spread in his chest.

“Team up?”

“Team up.”

Tuk has been his little sister since he held her in his arms for the first time. Neteyam snuck him over when they were barely into puberty and put a baby the size of his torso into his arms

He remembers her being the most terrifying thing in the world. He was so sure she would be terrified of him, that he would make her cry as soon as she was in his arms and the other kids would realize he’s a monster

But Tuk has always been Tuk and she just grinned and pulled his hair. Her Tswin fluttered with her affections and he knew he would do anything for her

He had never seen her angry, truly angry, until she stumbled into him cleaning the cuts along his hips and back. The cloths on the floor are bloody and his skin is angry and mottled but he had been decent at hiding the level of it until now. Behind her, Neytiri stops in her tracks as she takes in his scars

Tuk’s eyes fill with tears and then he has a bundle of 5’7” child in his arms

Her eyes flash and she looks like her mother when she growls out; “What happened? They hurt you?”

He stutters, not knowing what to say when Neytiri kneels down in front of him. She takes the ointment and the bandages in front of him, moves his arm from his side, and begins to apply. Her hands are shaking and he realizes he’s never seen her frazzled

“You’re a child.”

He looks up, Tuk now angrily crying in his arms while she cleans and gently bandages the wounds. “I..I know…look, I’m sorry Tuk saw, I-I didn’t think anyone was coming back for a while..”

“You’re a child. Children are precious. I-I didn’t realize they…that…” She scowls down at the drying blood and puts the wrap down. She pulls him forward so he rests against her with Tuk snug between them. “I’m sorry, Spider. This will not happen again.”

His face is red and words don’t seem to work but he manages a scared nod. “O-Okay?”

She nods, decisive, and resumes her work. Then, lifts a dirty dread with a disgruntled finger. “These next. My children will not be seen looking uncared for.”

And that’s that. He has a family, a home, and it’s all he ever wanted.

He doesn’t think it could get better.

Part two coming cause holy shit it's 2000 words

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willowser · 8 months

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i keep getting this thought in my head of bakugou, for the majority of his life, just having this view and understanding of like. my body gets the job done. i take care of it so i can do what i need to do. scars, wounds, imperfections don't matter, as long as i can keep going.

like almost no fucks for what it looks like in an aesthetic sense. he works out, he eats right because then he can do his job right. it's got nothing to do with trying to appeal to anyone.

and then you come along. and for the very first time—he's leaning a little closer to the mirror in the morning, brushing a finger over the scar on his face. when he gets dressed for the day, his eyes can't seem to rip away from the marred skin of his torso: at his hip, at his shoulder, right in the middle of his chest.

is that...something that would scare you? that you'd find....ugly? would you prefer him without them?

i wouldn't say it makes him terribly physically insecure, but. he is hesitating for just a second the first time he takes his shirt off around you. if you look at him head-on for too long, he's ducking his head and turning it, so that way only the pretty side is visible.

#i have a hard time imagining him insecure about his body #bc i really think he thinks of it as a weapon/tool in a way #and as long as it works then that's all he cares about #what the fuck does it matter if it's not smooth and perfect and clean cut like. go to hell.#LMAOOOO #but then he gets oh-so interested in you and he's like. well. hang on.#maybe you'd like it better if it was less. fucked up. LOL #waahh. sad.#✿ thoughts: bakugou #✿ theme: pre relationship bakugou

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luck-of-the-drawings · 3 months

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so REVENGE, HUH? or justice, if that makes you feel better. it tastes the same when cooked just right. 'I REALLY WANTED A BROTHER.' such a shame to burn a bridge you so desperately wanted to keep, especially when it wasnt even you who started the fire. especially when you hope that not a single fragment of that bridge ever washes ashore.[MAY IT ROT FAR FROM MY SIGHTS] an unfortunate loss! atleast he has his friends.

#jrwi fanart #jrwi show #jrwi prime defenders #jrwi prime defenders spoilers #jrwi pd spoilers #jrwi pd #william wisp #vyncent sol #THIS ONE IS FUUUUCKIN OOOOOLLDD RAAAHHHHH i made it like. a year ago. but didnt finish it for so so long bc i just wasnt happy w it.#BUT LIKE A CENTURY EGG the decades of being encased in salt n lime n ash have done WELL to bring out the flavores of this piece #i sorta recently cleaned it up and posted it onto twitty. didnt tag it bc it was SO OLD AND SCUFFED(i see so many MISTAKES NOW)#that i didnt want to expose it to the open air just like that #if i show smth to my small circles then it shall only be understood in those small circles.#open air and open interpretation from minds i cannot predict are NOT something i enjoy the thought of. usually. i am brave tho #BUT EVERYONE ON TWITTY WAS SO NICEEE i was like damn... i guess it IS good enough to be enjoyed by the masses...#lets work on being nicer to our art together. THAT BEING SAID. i really love my colors here HELL YEAHHHH #FIRST TIME IN A WHILE COLORIN THESE BOYS.... i dont use proper color enough..I ALSO RLY LIKE MY BACKGROUNDS HERE #i LOVE when the bg is hyperrealistic (i frankestiened stock photos) and when the subjects are all flat colored n cartoony #recently rewatched Making Fiends and they do that similar thing!! soft shading! lotsa details! almost painted? ill paint one day #ive already rambled so much abt the art im runnin out of ROOm to ramble about WWWIILLIAM GODDAMN WWIIIISP. its been a minute since i saw-#-this episode..but i DO remember the funny smoke trick that will did to his funny brother. EVERYTIME U GIVE AN ORDER. THAT BRINGS HARM-#-INDIRECTLY OR NOT. YOU WILL HEAR THOSE SCREAMS. YOU WILL FEEL THAT PAIN. OHHH WHAT A COOL PUNISHMENT THAT IS #its still an olive branch in a sense! a final chance for big bro bell to show that hes NOT an irrideemable piece o shit. and if not #well. to the wolves of psychosis with him!!! i really think william did the best he could here. if i was in his shoes i have no doubt i-#-woulda done the same. IM ALSO GLAD THAT VYN DECIDED TO STICK AROUND N SUPPORT HIM! thas character development baybe!!#i loooove prime defenders.. its been so long since i watched any eps of it but i KNOW it still has such a grip on my heart..GOTTA rewatch i

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general-cyno · 7 months

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I haven't stopped thinking about zolu after wano bc isn't it crazy that zoro, as enma's new wielder, has declared he might as well become the king of hell and it turns out he's a descendant of the shimotsuki/frost moon family line, making him a descendant of shimotsuki ryuma the god of the blade whom he resembles physically, whose sword zoro earned after defeating his zombie in thriller bark and who's considered a hero of wano that's only rivaled now by joy boy - luffy's sun god nika the warrior of liberation and joy. that both zoro's presence and luffy's df awakening as nika/joy boy in wano were considered the "work of fate". how zoro was luffy's first crewmate, one he actively sought after learning just his name and fearsome reputation. the whole pirate king and greatest swordsman business. their parallels to roger and ray. how they both have the will of kings/conquerors. I feel insane

#zolu #tp #I am extremely fascinated by this turn of events ngl I'm not sure if something's being cooked here #(in the manga I mean) but the food sure smells good #like what the hell is this #also I just caught up with the manga to the most recent chapter so thinking abt these two is the balm I need rn #after all those ahem. very recent dark turns. I love OP so much it's so good #I also think it's funny that zoro's birth month lowkey spoiled his family origins lmao #considering what shimotsuki most commonly means apparently #and I mentioned it in the long wano post I made but #the mix of fate and choice wrt zolu is just. really good

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gracelesstars · 3 months

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"Back when you first came into my life, I recalled a place that I knew as a child A special place One that I held close to my heart Won’t you lead me in a dance down this winding road where light and shadow entwine to take hold of the thoughts of the one left far behind? Know that, sometimes, I want to turn around and see the things that I’ve passed on the journey, but know with love on my side, with courage and pride, I’ll fight I will carry on"

R.I.P. Akira Toriyama

#Akira Toriyama #Dragon Ball #dragonball #dbz #dragon ball GT #Goku #I haven't seen that stupid fcking show for like 17yrs why the hell am i crying??#like damn #I started watching it when I was 5 #and then it became the first show that I saw to the end #Dragon Ball GT being the first series finale that I've ever experienced #i remember it being so weird as a child to lose something you've had for so long #for years I've been rushing home back from school to be able to see it on TV #...and then decades later seeing that everyone in the world was obsessed with it #it wasn't just my silly little kid show #like everyone under 50 know about Goku #as someone else said he really be up there with Sherlock Holmes Dracula and other legendary characters #What a legacy Akira Toriyama Thank you

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a-dauntless-daffodil · 4 months

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@goated33 got me thinking-

in some ways, vaggie has the personality and risk assessment capabilities of a small furry animal

meaning everyone in hell THINKS she's the idiot chihuahua, picking fights with the local dobermans, getting metaphorically (literally?) dragged away by charlie for her own good

the twist is she's actually one of those damn weasel things, able to fuck up creatures several times her size and almost impossible to kill normally- yet STILL she's somehow picking fights waaaaay above her weight class

charlie got headaches over this in the early days, i bet. before vaggie simmered down from "don't kill kids wft" to "sinners maybe kinda redeemable actually? not for killy killy stab??"

even now though there's the vibe that, if left alone with alastor and even one less fuck to give, vaggie would be throttling him in seconds flat

this would probably not go well... sadly, once she got started, i could see her probably not noticing or caring much. imagine charlie worrying about this possibility a lot. some nights staying awake, concerned who her girlfriend might pick a fight with next, while vaggie lies fast asleep in her arms, blissfully smiling... likely dreaming of finally getting to stab somebody again like she means it <3

#hazbin hotel #vaggie #charlie morningstar #chaggie #headcanons #vaggie is a really nice person as long as you're not getting on her nerves #she also #enjoys violence #has killed thousands of mostly helpless people #and was the only one in a crowd of demons and the king of actual hell #to smile and cheer #as her old boss was brutally murder killed in front of her #she's kinda fucked up is what im saying #what that says about /charlie/ for knowing AND liking AND kissing her anyway is-#fucked up women HOT #charlie very bi #and they lived happily ever after #in hell #The End~

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galacticlamps · 29 days

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ok I have A Lot of thoughts about the staircase confession (well really about Edwin's whole character arc, but all roads lead to rome) but for now I just wanna say that, yes, I was bracing myself for something to go terribly wrong when I first watched it, and yes, part of me was initially worried its placement might be an uncharacteristically foolish choice made in the name of Drama or Pacing or Making a Compelling Episode of Television but at the expense of narrative sense--

But I wanna say that having taken all that into account, and watched it play out, and sat with it - and honestly become rather transfixed by it - I really think it's a beautifully crafted moment and truly the only way that arc could've arrived at such a satisfying conclusion.

And if I had to pinpoint why I not only buy it but also have come to really treasure it, I'd have to put it down to the fact that it genuinely is a confession, and nothing else.

That moment is an announcement of what Edwin has come to understand about himself, but because it takes the form of a character admitting romantic feelings for such a close friend, I think it can be very easy, when writing that kind of thing, to imbue it with other elements like a plea or a request or even the start of a new relationship that, intentionally or not, would change the shape of the moment and can quickly overshadow what a huge deal the telling is all on its own. But that's not the case here. Since it is only a confession, unaccompanied by anything else, and since we see afterward how it was enough, evidently, to fix the strangeness that had grown between him & Charles, we're forced to understand that it was never Edwin's feelings that were actually making things difficult for him - it was not being able to tell Charles about them. 'Terrified' as he's been of this, Edwin learns that his feelings don't need to either disappear completely or be totally reciprocated in order for him to be able to return to the peace, stability, and security of the relationship with which he defines his existence - and the scale of that relief a) tells us a hell of a lot about Edwin as a character and b) totally justifies the way his declaration just bursts out of him at what would otherwise be such a poorly chosen moment, in my opinion.

Whether or not they are or ever could be reciprocated, Edwin's feelings are definitively proven not to be the problem here - only his potential choice to bottle it up - his repression - is. And where that repression had once been mainly involuntary, a product of what he'd been through, now that he's got this new awareness of himself, if he still fails to admit what he's found either to himself or to the one person he's so unambiguously close with, then that repression will be by his own choice and actions.

And he won't do that. Among other things, he's coming into this scene having just (unknowingly) absolved the soul of his own school bully and accidental killer by pointing out a fact that is every bit as central to his self-discovery as anything about his sexuality or his attraction to Charles is: the idea that "If you punish yourself, everywhere becomes Hell"

So narratively speaking, of course it makes sense that Edwin literally cannot get out of Hell until he stops punishing himself - and right now, the thing that's torturing him is something he has control over. It's not who he is or what he feels, but what he chooses to do with those feelings that's hurting him, and he's even already made the conscious choice to tell Charles about them, he was just interrupted. But now that they're back together and he's literally in the middle of an attempt to escape Hell, there is absolutely no way he can so much as stop for breath without telling Charles the truth. Even the stopping for breath is so loaded - because they're ghosts, they don't need to breathe, but also they're in Hell, so the one thing they can feel is pain, however nonsensical. And Edwin certainly is in pain. But whether he knows what he's about to do or not when he says he 'just needs a tick,' a breather is absolutely not what's gonna give him enough relief to keep climbing - it's fixing that other hurt, though, that will.

Like everything else in that scene, there's a lot of layers to him promising Charles "You don't have to feel the same way, I just needed you to know" - but I don't think that means it isn't also true on a surface level. It's the act of telling Charles that matters so much more than whatever follows it, and while that might have gone unnoticed if anything else major had happened in the same conversation, now we're forced to acknowledge its staggering and singular importance for what it is. The moment is well-earned and properly built up to, but until we see it happen in all its wonderful simplicity, and we see the aftermath (or lack thereof, even), we couldn't properly anticipate how much of a weight off Edwin's shoulders merely getting to share the truth with Charles was going to be, why he couldn't wait for a better, safer opportunity before giving in to that desire, or how badly he needed to say it and nothing else - and I really, really love the weight that act of just being honest, seen, and known is given in their story/relationship.

#dead boy detectives #edwin payne #the case of the very long stairway #im sorry this really IS the short version of my thoughts i swear #i didnt want to get long and rambley backing everything up and mentioning everything else this forces me to reconsider #i just feel like i've barely interacted w this fandom and still seen quite a few odd duck takes on this moment imo #i dont think he wouldntve got the nerve to say it otherwise #(he was already going to! & if anything his new experiences in hell only cement that being the right choice)#and as much as i get what fear can do to a person i still definitely dont think he was resigned to staying in hell if charles reacted badly #i truly think he just couldnt keep it to himself any longer #the show is upfront about his escaping hell being a testament to his own strength rather than a lucky break of some sort #so i think even being on the receiving end of a rescue mission getting out still must take a lot of strength in this universe #and telling charles that definitely made him stronger/in less pain #so yeah totally necessary it happened where and when it did in my book #also i hope it doesnt sound like im being dismissive of anything charles says in this scene #but the way i see it those were all things they both already knew #so reaffirming them just adds to the idea that the act of Telling Each Other Things is what's so important here #rather than counting as a truly separate thing this conversation achieves #just my two cents

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brainrotisseriechicken · 2 months

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hi....scrapped wip again. im rlly not built for color. yap incoming

sorry my productivity tanked my 7 year old laptop is nearing its final breath and im just stalling buying a new one as long as possible to not violate the boycott but she (laptop) is making this shit DIFFICULT

im gnna be so honest w yall i havent had the drive to do shit all lately like. i need dopamine kicks to function but nothings working for some reason ??? i bought a jjk book and i fucking love jjk so i should be excited but im ??? not????? fucked up how that works

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arcanegifs · 2 months

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#BRUHHHHHH I NEED ANOTHER TEASER I BEG YOU RIOT #ITS BEEN THREE YEARS I CANT WAIT TO USE NEW CONTENT FOR GIFS LMAO #personal tag #dont look at me im just here to complain about content drought lmao its really not good in fostering a healthy fandom ngl #because ppl will just hyperfixate and consume media for like a month and then the fandom goes poof right after lol #i miss all the people scrutinizing media every week i miss all the essays pumping out when content arrives #these days its just.... nothing lmao i only really still have arcane in my mind because of fanfiction and a lot of fics have been inactive #ik we're getting new stuff in a few months #and ik we're not in canceled shows hell but like #i really hope that if theres season 3 we're gonna get it a bit more regularly #i really miss it when content was like weekly or every 2 weeks because ppl and the fandom are wayyyy more active during those times #binge culture and netflix sort of changed it lol #i miss it when fandoms were huge!!! i miss it when it was so CHAOTIC lmaooooooooo #I MISS WAITING FOR LONG ASS HOURS WAITING FOR CONTENT TO RELEASE EVERY WEEK!!!! I MISS IT!!!! that was like what 12 years ago LOL #I KNOW arcane is special with their 3 year drought because it takes time to make arcane #but like..... idk man i miss content lmao #iirc they took too long to make s2 bc they have no idea if s1 would be even renewed #so i hope s3 will be a bit more regular now #anyways im gonna go bye bye

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otaku553 · 5 months

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Less than one week into the new academic term seems a rather poor time to have an existential crisis

#hi all it’s back to goodnotes doodles for the time being again #really should find some way to stop my nail biting habit #why is this homework so long. what the hell actually #if I had a nickel for every time someone told me I sit like L from death note…..

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uncanny-tranny · 7 months

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At this point, gender nonconformity is about what the person says their experience is.

If a woman with a beard or a man with lipstick and a mustache says they're gender nonconforming, then they are! If a woman with short hair or a man with long hair says they aren't, they aren't! And that's not even getting into the awesome nonbinary, abinary, genderqueer, intersex, and general genderfuckery that may both be and not be conforming.

So much of what is even considered gender conforming or gender nonconforming is based on a world of exclusion. When we start defining one's conformity with whether they fit into white cishetero perisex standards or not, we play into the idea that there's only a very narrow window of what is considered worthy of time and thought.

#gender nonconformity #gnc #queer #like. for instance a native man who keeps long hair might be considered GNC by white standards but for him it's absolutely not nonconformit #there's an aspect of white supremacy that silences everything else while saying that other culture's silence is indicative of whiteness...#...being 'correct' or 'moral' or 'neutral'#and as somebody who's trans and last i checked white i have my own thoughts from my own experiences #like how i don't consider myself to really be a GNC man. i'm just. man+#i'm a weird concoction of weird soup that tastes like a man but if it were Wrong #and i just don't see that as not conforming to manhood like it is seperate. i see it as irrevocably linked TO manhood #it is others who have excluded and exiled me from manhood because of *their* understanding of me and how i 'fit in' in cissexism #while i will never ever say i know what it's like to not be white i will say these conversations that PoC have started have been INVALUABLE #i am forever grateful to have been extended the patience and faith to listen in on the experiences of people...#...who are racialized in terms of gender and how they do/don't 'fit in' with often white supremacist views on gender/dynamics #may have made a post like this years back but. eh. arrest me officer i will not back down #i've been more and more 'gnc' as i go into my transition and i don't see it as nonconformity but as an outlet for my masculinity #which is why i'm not insecure about my crafts and creations. because it is coming from a male whether or not it's considered 'manly'#i have little to *no place* in cissexist society so why should i put any stakes into if they ~accept~ me #made this post while jamming out to skyrim's tavern OST (paused my game to write this)#why the HELL does the skyrim tavern music have to go SO HARD. i NEED to slam down BARRELS of mead while listening to this istg #i don't even LIKE honey so i haven't tried mead but. for skyrim i would.

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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 1 year

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Mission Failed

[First] Prev <–-> Next

#Poorly Drawn MDZS #MDZS #season 1 #wei wuxian #lan wangji #to wwx’s credit the plan wasn’t a *bad* one #he just had to stop and ogle a man's back for like...2 min too long #mind you he is looking at all those scars and rightfully going 'yo what the HELL did they do?"#the fact wwx breaks character to say he wasn't peeping to lwj is really cute to me #even though he doubles down with the juniors later #to me at least its a way of showing that he respects lwj quite a bit and feels bad to have intruded #I'm a demi wwx truther and it is way too early into the journey for any of *those* feelings yet #I'm aware that's not a popular interpretation and I'm certainly not claiming its the only interpretation; just my own B*)#anyways sorry for the literal cock-blocking fish #I'm trying to keep it sfw for now

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artkaninchenbau · 10 months

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An AWS comic

#My art #For the record I am not a medical professional and as far as I know AWS isn't even something you can be diagnosed with???#It's so hard to describe what the two sensory hallucinations really *FEEL* like #Like the time one... You know how a dramatic slow motion scene looks like in an anime?#It's like that but if you made it a 60 fps interpolated version of it #It is an absolutely bizarre feeling #Meanwhile the hyper awareness and everything feeling intense feels like how a fisheye lens shot in an anime feels #No I could not be bothered to try to figure out how to draw that for this comic #For the record I haven't actually had those visual hallucinations since I was a small small child #Hell I don't even think I had any hallucinations in my teens at all like #The sensory ones just kinda started happening again in the past 7 years or so?#Also the swelling sensation I've only had once so far. Usually I get the hyper awareness sensation #(Also sometimes I get this intense feeling of swaying when I go to bed but that might not be an AWS thing??)#(Like there's other things that could make you feel like you're rocking on a boat when laying down so I didn't include that)#No I have never talked to anyone about these hallucinations because for the longest time I didn't know what they were #And they are like. Harmless. Like I'm 100% aware they're just strange sensations but not real at all #They last max 15 minutes if even that long and they happen like super rarely #Only once have I had the hyper awareness be SO INTENSE it made me feel distressed #So like. It doesn't really affect my life at all? So why bother with it?#Also IDK if I could even go to a doctor and ask about AWS and have them know what that even is #And even if I could as far as I know there is no treatment for it so like. Whatever #As long as I don't start having distressing hallucinations or visual hallucination's I'll be fiiiiiine

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pocketramblr · 5 months

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Absolutely love your writing for all the AU/5 headcanons asks. Can I ask: AU where Rei cheats on Endeavor with All Might? It happens after AM's injury, so she doesn't recognize him, and he ofc doesn't know that she's married in the first place, much less to whom

you make this very difficult for me by giving me a window of 6 and half years for them to have an affair and for every single moment of that window, Rei is institutionalized. how am i supposed to get them to meet, much less take their clothes off. ok. think. there are other fic writers who specialize in this kind of thing, surely. what would they do....

1- ok so. The fire alarm at the hospital goes off. Rei doesn't know if it's a drill or not, but she's been there for seven years and generally does not need a lot of support during something like this like other patients do, so the nurses wave her out and she stands around outside a bit waiting for the fire alarm to stop and them to go back in. (It isn't a drill, they wouldn't have evacuated everyone if it was, but Rei is on the other side of the building and facing away from seeing any smoke) (This smoke is from a villain attack that All Might is taking care of, though he's only got seconds left of his power to use that day. he quickly rushes off, deflating and stumbling out on the other side of the hospital. Where Rei is.)

2- Rei is like "huh that guy doesnt seem to be in good shape" and kinda waves attention at him, and a nurse who's passing out water to patients and keeping an eye on the road gives Toshinori some too, getting more concerned when he dazedly answers that he's All Might and coughs up blood, but the nurse figures he's concussed since he smells of smoke and must have been closer to the fight, and is just reeling from being able to see the number one hero in person. Then they get distracted and wave Toshi to wait nearby, where Rei offers to chill his water and asks if he's alright, if he breathed in any smoke.

3- They chat and then go back into the hospital as it's un-evacuated together, Rei hanging out in the lobby where he sits as the hospital staff focus on getting everyone else back to their rooms. It pays to be low priority sometimes. Eventually she tells him her name is Rei and that she's in room K18, if he ever wants to visit or call. She doesn't get to talk to anyone except doctors, family visitors, or other paitients, and most of them don't stay nearly as long as she does. It's been seven years, and she's very lonely. Toshinori is lonely too, and when he's out of time for a day and feeling useless with nothing to do, he likes to talk to a friend.

4- Rei has been in the hospital for eight years when it gets physical. At that point, Toshinori knows a bit about her family. She has kids, mentions visits from a son and daughter, and then quietly mentioned when her son turned seventeen- her daughter's already twenty. She's been there for so much of their lives. He asks if she's married, and she admits she isn't sure how to file for divorce in a hospital like she is, if she even can, if she wants to because she'd lose custody, if it matters when she's not raising them anyway. He doesn't ask much more, knows there is a dead child and a baby she says isn't safe with her there. Toshinori never called Nana 'mom' to her face while she was alive, and had a reason for it, and has a similar reason for not asking more, not asking for the other names when he gets Fuyumi and Natsuo's. Yes, the doctors and nurses all know Rei has a boyfriend who visits. they don't say anything. who would they even tell, anyway. I debated the humor of reusing the bit from candlelight shoto that Toshi and Rei could have a kid with a fire quirk, but yeah here? Rei ain't getting pregnant, absolutely not.

5- When Natsuo turns eighteen, Rei does actually file for divorce, or at least tries to get the ball rolling on that. Toshinori's trusted her that her marriage is over in all but name, but he's more at ease with it ended fully. Fuyumi is crushed but burying it all deep inside. Natsuo is like 'what are you talking about. divorce is the most normal possible outcome here.' But anyway, Rei also begins to bring up being discharged- something she never bothered with earlier, when it seemed like she'd never be able to go home while Shoto was there, and never would want to go back anyway. (Her parents are absolutely not an option either so where would she go once discharged? the hospital was her only security.) Toshinori then tells her at this point about his diagnosis, that he's supposed to be terminal, in a way. He doesn't have a lot of time he can give her. Rei says that's ok, she'll take what she can get. She moves in. Fuyumi still goes out to eat with her once a week, though Rei doesn't say she's moved in with a boyfriend, just says she's in a safe place and it's not Fuyumi's job to worry about it, please, let her do that, relax, be her daughter instead of a mother. Natsuo adds her to his cellphone plan and gets her one. Rei doesn't tell Toshinori her ex's identity. Toshinori doesn't tell her about OfA, though she does know he's mentoring a student for heroics and is very proud of him. (Toshinori is a secretary at Might Tower, he's a great mentor. Oh huh, he got a job position at UA at the same time as All Might, she wonders if they carpool.)

+1- OK THE REVEAL so the reveal is. Toshinori gets home from the SF. And Rei almost knocks him out by the door, eyes wide and panicked, asking if he's ok, if Shoto's ok. Toshinori is like "... young todoroki? yeah he's alright? i know his fight with young bakugo looked bad but- Rei???" And that's when it all clicks for him, he's having dozens of horrible realizations at once, all while Rei weeps over her youngest. Toshinori's been a hero for a very, very long time. He's felt hopeless, before. But even then, he's known what needs to be done, he just isn't able to do it. But now? he's at a complete loss with no idea what he should do.

#quick poll here. um. do we think shoto knows his parents are divorced #because i mean theres a lot of things he doesnt know about his family that he should #its not like they're really talking at that point #on the other hand. would enji have told him out of frustration for him clinging to his ice when rei left them?#basically. which one is funnier #Shoto going 'mom divorced you??? OH HELL YEAH GOOD FOR HER IM ONLY USING ICE TO CELEBRATE THAT i mean i know she hates me sure she should.#as long as she isn't tied to YOU anymore either we are going down hand in unlovable hand old man!!!'#or #shoto having no idea of the divorce and so when the truth comes out #either from toshinori or rei #hes like 'HELL YEAH YOUVE BEEN CHEATING ON DAD WITH ALL MIGHT???? HIGH FIVE MOM THATS THE BEST POSSIBLE REVENGE DABI WISHES HE'D #ORCHESTRATED THIS BUT HE NEVER HAD THE CREATIVITY TO!!! wait what do you mean its not cheating anymore because youre divorced'#these tags are funny because wow theres a lot of yikes and heavy stuff in the main post. ah ha ha. ah.#pocket talks to people #ask game #anon

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carlyraejepsans · 3 months

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i wish i had more energy to draw and plot lately i NEED to make the insane daemoverse flowisk situationship real. i need you guys to see my vision

#they're the only ones that understand each other they're the only ones marred from the same mistakes #nobody else can understand the way save power changes you and they don't know how to live with it afterwards #but hell if they're not going to stick around each other to see what happens next #there's a chara shaped hole carved into both of their chests and they want it back they can't bear being alone again. but they have to #and so they cling to each other. because who else will understand?#and they are FREAKS!!!!!!!#a freak and a frea(s)k #also it's been like 12 years since the barrier broke. what does it mean to grow up after you spent so long stuck in stasis #what does it mean to Change and develop past the solidity of what you thought you were #also they're really stupid roommates frisk keeps eating raw ramen blocks to avoid doing the dishes #they have one of those mad detectives corkboard with the red string going everywhere which is almost impossible to walk through #because flowey handles it and he keeps ignoring the fact that he's 2ft tall while frisk. isn't. lol #also the corkboard is 70% investigation and 30% them bickering about stupid bullshit as commentary #the post it situation in the flat is insane #daemo tag #frisk #flowey

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hailsatanacab · 4 months

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Hiiiiii

I’m so curious about wip 1

Also I have like over a hundred wips and I can’t believe you did this to me 😭😭 /j

hey, you're welcome 😚🫴💕 i can't wait to see all your 100+ wips!

ooh I've had number 1 (a lot can change in a month) percolating for a while now and I've never been sure how far I want to go with it. I have pretty much all of it mapped out and it has the most bittersweet ending that I can't wait to write 😇✨ - anyway, have a wee little snippet :)

———

A month.

That's how long Danny Fenton had made his home with the Waynes before finding out his adoptive family's secret. The cave beneath the manor. Their hidden lives as vigilantes.

It was... a surprise, to say the least. One that he hadn't quite welcomed.

It threw him off, of course it did. This was meant to be his chance at living a normal life, a chance to leave behind his own heroics buried in the ruins of Amity, and then he had to go ahead and shack up with the birds and the bats, of all people! He just can't catch a break!

But... Well, after several tearful conversations and reassurances that no, he categorically did not have to join the team (thank the Ancients, because there's no way Danny's telling them about Phantom, not yet), things were starting to look pretty alright. The dust was finally settling and it felt like he was beginning to find his feet again.

That was last week.

This week, Bruce Wayne is dead and the family is falling apart.

#dpxdc #wip game #so you might have guessed but this is a 'danny and tim go on a time adventure to save bruce' fic!#and i've been struggling with whether to have danny and tim go off to the league of shadows for ra's help or not?#i know that's what tim did in canon and i kinda want to do it to have some fun danny and tim interactions #but that might make the fic too long and like... idk i don't really know much about what happens during that arc #anyway i just really wanted to do a little scene where tim and dick are fighting and danny hops in like 'you think bruce is stuck in time?#well then let's get going i know a guy who knows a guy this'll be fine!!!'#dick thinks the delusions are catching and tim... thinks maybe the delusions are catching. well he knows he's right about this but danny?#that guy can't be mentally sound what the hell is he on about?

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