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rmsrkive · 18 hours
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𝐖𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐖𝐀𝐒 𝐈 𝐌𝐀𝐃𝐄 𝐅𝐎𝐑? | 𝐌𝐘 𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐄 𝐀𝐃𝐃𝐈𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 — 𝐁𝐓𝐒
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summary: in which bts find themselves completely and utterly infatuated with one of the members of hybe’s newest girl group, le sserafim, developing a strange and unhealthy addiction to their junior
warnings: age gap (3-8 year age gap), oc is of consenting and legal age, yandere bts, unhealthy, possessive, and obsessive behavior, violence, idol au
a/n: here is the next oneshot of my strange addiction! i wanted to dedicate the second oneshot to providing a backstory of oc's life before she became an idol and what led her to quit her passion as a gymnast. i DO NOT know much about gymnastics so please forgive me for how vague this entire oneshot seems! if there are any inaccuracies, i apologize in advance and hope you understand. thank you! (also no bangtan in this one)
rating: 18+ (minors dni)
pairings: ot7 x fem reader
word count: 7479
taglist [CLOSED]: @thepixienamednyxie @inlovewithallmusic @afiaaaa19 @minchedchilli @severuslovebot @jjkluver7 @solaany @taekritimin123 @notvantaes @jewishmommy @weeeeeekly @0rubyrose0 @thechillmage @cuntessaiii @earth2joon @huni7857 @yukichan67 @coralmusicblaze @ts-1030 @mochisdayone @devilzliaison @hollyschit @whenthebeatdrop-beatdrop @crushedblackroses @xicanacorpse @blackswan446 @stopeatread @iammeandmeisiam @monysakura @iveivory
taglist note: the taglist for my strange addiction is CLOSED. if you asked to be added to the taglist prior to this oneshot being published but i did NOT add you, please let me know so i can add you right away,
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Gymnastics was the only stability you had in your life.
When you were ten, your parents divorced. Constant fights were between them, often over minuscule subjects that were not worth arguing over. Their marriage had been strained before you were even born but they stayed together once they found out that your mom was pregnant with you. Holding onto a broken marriage for the sake of your surprise baby was an impressive feat but it only meant that they held resentment toward you. To your parents, you were the sole reason why they had yet to divorce. They were both tied down to you because they had to raise you and while they thought they were preventing you from growing up in a broken home, you were actually susceptible to their resentment.
They eventually divorced, leaving you amid a failed marriage. You tried picking up the broken pieces, desperately scrambling around in hopes they would love each other once again. Your attempts were futile and soon enough, you found yourself being exchanged at a random gas station every other weekend.
Not too long after they divorced, both of your parents found a new significant other and before you knew it, you had two additional parents and several step-siblings in your life. It rubbed you the wrong way how quickly they seemed to move on. Granted, they were in a loveless marriage for quite some time but to you, it seemed like they weren't mourning the loss of the family. You loved your step-parents and step-siblings more than anything as they welcomed you into their lives with open arms but sometimes you wished they didn't appear in your life so soon after your parents divorced. The wound of having split parents was too fresh and gaining new family members within a year of the divorce only added more pain.
You had three biological older siblings, two brothers, and one sister. All three of them were significantly older than you and by the time you were old enough to form a proper relationship with them, they were off to college to pursue their own future. Even now years later, you barely had a relationship with them. In your eyes, they were complete strangers with only the bond of a shared bloodline linking all of you. There was never a second thought about any of them.
When you were in elementary and middle school, you missed out on school often for gymnastics competitions around the world. After moving up to the junior level, you found yourself having to skip more and more school days to practice and prepare for all of the competitions you had to partake in. All of the friendships you had eventually dwindled away until you were left with your friends from the gym. Eventually, those friendships became rivalries as you competed against the same girls you once called your best friends.
Being a gymnast was the only constant in your life.
While everybody in your life slowly left you, you continued to pursue your career as a professional gymnast. The losses never swayed you as long as your hard work meant that you would end up with an Olympic title. Your only concern was reaching the goals you set for yourself once you determined in your heart that you would become a professional gymnast, no matter what it took.
But sometimes you wished you held onto your friendships and relationships tighter.
"I have never seen such sloppy technique from you, Y/N." Your coach glowered at you, a murderous glint in her eye. "The Olympics are right around the corner and here you are struggling with even the simplest of elements. Do you think you deserve to go to the Olympics when there are dozens of girls out there who are much better than you?"
You winced at her insult, your face burning in shame as you stared at the ground. Truth be told, you had no excuse as to why your practices weren't the best lately. Having an off day was normal for any athletes but you were having an unacceptable amount. In fact, you had been practicing poorly ever since you were named to be on the Olympic team.
"I'm sorry," You mumbled, looking up at your coach. "I'm trying my best."
"Your best isn't enough anymore, Y/N. If this is considered your best, what are you going to do when you get to Tokyo? Hoping that doing your best will get you an Olympic medal is a joke. You need to snap out of whatever mind block you're stuck in if you want to win a medal."
The pain from sinking your teeth into your bottom lip startled you, the taste of metallic mixing with the sting of your broken skin. Your coach sighed, rubbing her forehead as her gaze on you softened.
"You have a lot of potential, Y/N. I may be biased because you're my student but I know that you can win at least one gold medal in Tokyo. I've seen what you can do and you're miles above every other gymnast who qualified for the Olympics. Even if times are tough now, competing at the biggest competition in the world will be worth it. I promise it'll get better even if it feels like it won't. I believe in you, Y/N and I hope you believe in yourself too."
"Yes, coach." You nodded your head.
"We'll end practice early today. Go home and get some rest."
It was days like these where you wished you had someone to lean on and receive comfort from. Not a single person came to mind as you trudged to the locker room with tears burning your eyes, the stress of making it to the Olympics gradually growing on you. Nowadays, you often wake up with your heart pounding out of your chest and sweat dripping down your face as if you experienced a nightmare because of the stress that was weighing down on you. The second you realized you were awake, a feeling of dread washed over you as you thought about the future that lay ahead. The type of mindset and lifestyle that was overtaking your life was exhausting, to say the least.
Nevertheless, you powered through each and every day because giving up was not an option. You worked far too hard since you were three to quit gymnastics when the Olympics were right around the corner. You couldn't do that to your parents, who had put money and time into ensuring you would have a successful career. You couldn't do that to your older siblings who had their attention ripped away from them so their parents could focus on their youngest child. You couldn't do that to your coach who had spent the past five years pushing you and helping you become a better gymnast even when you were sure that you reached your limit. Too many people sacrificed a part of themselves for you to become one of the top gymnasts in the world; if you quit now, it would be a slap in the face to them.
How could you do that to the people you loved?
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Y/N Y/L/N: The Gold Medal Favorite for the 2020 Tokyo Olympics
As the 2020 Tokyo Olympics is just around the corner, there are several names to look out for; Naomi Osaka, Simone Biles, Katie Ledecky, Allyson Felix, yet there is one athlete who has made a name for herself over the past four years: Y/N Y/L/N.
From the Republic of Korea, Y/L/N has made quite a name for herself in gymnastics. Her specialty is floor and she has blown the world away with her routines over the past few seasons. She has displayed extraordinary skills and tricks in her routines throughout the past few years. With several national and international titles, Y/L/N has become one of the favorites for an Olympic gold medal.
Hundreds of thousands of fans from around the world are said to be tuning into the Olympics to see her compete. She is currently one of South Korea's most famous athletes, being recognized among figure skating Olympic champion Kim Yuna and the legendary Son Heungmin. If Y/L/N wins an Olympic title in Tokyo this summer, she will be added to the Korean Sports Hall of Fame.
"Wow, the media is trying hard to push the Olympic champion agenda onto you." Yuri made a face, glad that she wasn't the one constantly in the spotlight. "This would make me want to kill myself."
"You're telling me." You mumbled.
Yuri liked to FaceTime you out of the blue despite being on the other side of the world. Ever since she started attending university, she found herself with more free time since she was no longer studying for the college entrance exam. Your step-sister was naturally a sociable person so you knew it killed her inside to dial down her social life once she began high school. You barely had any contact with her for the four years she was studying but now that she made it into South Korea's top university, all of her stress disappeared.
"What if you just quit gymnastics?" Yunchan wondered.
Yunchan was Yuri's older brother and he also was accepted to Seoul National University. You didn't expect any less from them as they had been extremely intelligent since you met them but having them attend the same university meant that they could bother you even more. As much as you loved your step-siblings, they annoyed you whenever they decided to bother you at random hours of the day.
"I've been thinking about it." You grumbled. "Don't give me ideas."
"What!?"
It was the first time saying out loud that you were thinking about quitting gymnastics. Every athlete at some point thought about quitting their beloved sport and even if they said it out loud, it was mostly an empty threat. You, on the other hand, were getting closer and closer to retiring each day. The toll that the wretched sport was taking on your mental and physical health was becoming gradually worse. As you progressed further in your career, more expectations were weighed down on your shoulders; you felt as if you couldn't make even the tiniest mistake without being berated. Ever since you began winning more competitions, it seemed as if the world was expecting perfection from you. You heard it from your coach and you heard it from the media and fans as well. While you didn't go out of your way to read articles and social media posts about you, some things did pop up on your feed which typically consisted of very opinionated comments.
On top of waking up with a start every morning, you were struggling to fall asleep. With the stress of a big competition around the corner, you found yourself unable to sleep with the tension and nerves weighing down on you. Melatonin helped for a little bit but eventually was no help. Every piece of advice provided by medical professionals and random strangers on the Internet was of no avail as well.
"Level with us, Y/Nie." Yunchan interrupted your train of thought. He noticed your troubled expression and mirrored it, worried that you were silently struggling and had been for a really long time. "You know we won't judge you and we're always here for you." Yuri nodded her head rapidly in agreement to show her support.
You pursed your lips together. "I don't like being a gymnast anymore. I think it's time for me to retire."
"Retire?" Yuri questioned incredulously. "You just turned 21. What do you mean it's time for you to retire?"
You couldn't help but smile at her remark, amused that she was assuming you were talking about retirement due to your age. "Not because I think I'm old, I'm just not happy being a gymnast. It's all I've been my entire life and I want to explore past that."
"That's true, you've definitely been tied down to gymnastics once people began to realize that you're very talented." Yunchan mused.
When he was younger, he heard his mom talking often about a girl named Y/N who was an incredible gymnast. You were a prodigy, somebody who was going to make it big in not only the world of gymnastics but in the world of athletes as well. He heard your name constantly until he met you one random day, being introduced to each other as step-siblings. Yunchan felt like he knew you inside and out before he even met you because of how much your dad talked about you.
"I guess I've been feeling unmotivated since the pandemic started," You confessed. "Having to train alone was exhausting; I was lucky that I had access to the gym but gymnastics became boring after not competing for so long and it still feels that way sometimes. Not only that, the media talks about how I'm the favorite for an Olympic gold medal and the way I'm being compared to Kim Yuna and Son Heungmin—the Kim Yuna and Son Heungmin mind you—is getting to me and the pressure has been stressing me out. The more expectations weighed down on me, the more I resent gymnastics. And now I don't want to compete anymore."
"Oh, unnie."
Yuri and Yunchan frowned, pitifully staring at you through the screen. You mustered a small smile, trying to hold back the tears that formed in your eyes out of frustration. You felt like a weight was somewhat lifted off of your shoulders after rambling to them but you had a lot more baggage to unpack. Confiding in somebody about the problems you had was the first step; acting upon them in a way that you would be happy with the end result was the final goal and quite frankly, it seemed as if you weren't going to reach it anytime soon.
"I don't know what to do anymore." You whispered, staring at your calloused hands that reflected the years of hardships endured from being a gymnast. "Don't get me wrong, I'm extremely grateful that my parents put in years of hard work and sacrifice so that I could be where I am today but why should I compete at the Olympics if I'm not happy anymore? There are so many gymnasts who didn't qualify for the Olympics that deserve my spot more than me. I guess I just feel bad about the entire situation."
"You deserve that position more than anyone, Y/Nie. It may be hard to believe but you know that you worked hard and sacrificed everything to make it where you are today. Sure, you may think that someone else is more deserving of your spot just because you don't want to be a gymnast anymore but that doesn't necessarily mean somebody should take your spot." Yuri said.
Yunchan nodded his head. "If you want to retire after the Olympics, then that's fine. I'm sure other athletes are in the same situation as you so there is nothing to feel bad about. It's okay to outgrow and move on from gymnastics because being a gymnast has been your identity for most of your life. You have the right to move beyond that and find something else that makes you happy." He added.
Your step-siblings were the youngest on both sides of your family yet they were wise beyond their years. You began to confide in them more as all three of you grew older and they never failed to provide you with comfort and advice. While your older siblings left you behind to start their own lives, Yuri and Yunchan immediately took their place. You were grateful that they were able to give you the relationship you always wanted with your older siblings but at the same time, you felt guilty for never making an effort to become closer to them
"Thanks, guys, I appreciate both of you so much." You sighed. "Even when we're on opposite sides of the world I can rely on you guys always. Where would I be without the two of the most important people in my life?"
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One downside of the Olympics being held in Tokyo was having to travel to the other side of the world. You were lucky to have booked a non-stop flight that allowed you to reach Japan in twelve hours but the total travel time including getting through security and trying to get to your hotel was well over twelve hours. You collapsed on your bed the moment you walked into your hotel room, eager to take a nap before dinner.
Your first practice was in two days and it was an unofficial practice. Your coach managed to squeeze in practice for you and the other Korean gymnasts to get a feel of what the gym was like. There was nothing worse than stepping into a competition without adjusting to the new environment; any extra practices made all the difference in how you and your teammates performed.
You turned onto your back and grabbed your phone from your pocket, pulling up YouTube to watch the latest episodes of Going Seventeen that you missed. You barely had any free time to indulge in your favorite K-pop group because you were too busy practicing. Now that you had free time until the next day, you were prepared to spend every second catching up on Seventeen content you missed.
"Y/N, open the door!"
With a groan, you rolled off of your bed and trudged over to the door. You swung the door open to see your teammates standing on the other side, displeased with how they interrupted your free time. They were all dressed up, looking much more put together than they did when you arrived in Tokyo. Yunseo and Seojeong looked at you up and down, unimpressed how your outfit still consisted of the hoodie and sweats you wore on the plane. Haksoen, Hansol, Junho, Jeahwan, and Sunghyun weren't amused by the situation either.
"Why aren't you dressed, unnie?" Yunseo was miffed.
"What do you mean why aren't I dressed?" You furrowed your eyebrows before looking down at the clothes you were wearing. "I'm not going anywhere."
"I told you she didn't read our messages." Hansol piped up.
You grabbed your phone off of your bed and swiped down on your notifications coming to find that your teammates discussed going out for dinner to explore Tokyo. Admittedly, you muted the group chat and put your phone on Do Not Disturb after their countless messages interrupted Don't Lie III. How could you watch in peace when their messages were bombarding you?
"Sorry." You sheepishly rubbed the back of your neck. "I was watching Going Seventeen."
"I knew that was the reason why she wasn't responding." Sunghyun rolled his eyes. "If she's too busy to answer us it's because she's looking at other men."
Seojeong wagged her finger at him disapprovingly. "Don't be jealous, Sunghyun."
This time it was you who rolled your eyes. You made a show of closing the door on them but they all protested, filing inside one by one and settling into your room.
"We'll wait while you get ready, unnie." Yunseo smiled sweetly. "Just don't take too long or else Junho oppa might bite your head off."
"Hey, uncalled for." Junho frowned.
You hastily grabbed a random outfit from your suitcase before ducking away into the bathroom to freshen up. Quite honestly, you didn't want to go out but also knew you had limited time to explore Tokyo. It was clear that Yunseo and Seojeong had an itinerary for your time in Tokyo because they immediately dragged the rest of the team to a restaurant that had a table prepared for all of you.
After eating a filling dinner of ramen and udon, the younger girls led the group to a shopping center. Yunseo linked arms with you, giggling as she pulled you down the bustling sidewalk away from everybody else. She sensed your dampened mood when she walked into your hotel room and was worried about your mental state declining right before the Olympics. Although she didn't train with you, Yunseo could tell you were silently battling an inner conflict.
"How are you, unnie?" She asked, deciding it was better to be straightforward rather than beat around the bush. "I feel like we haven't spoken much since we got here."
"I flew in this morning, Yunseo." You smiled amusedly.
"Exactly." The younger girl cleared her throat before turning to you with a serious expression. "Are you okay, unnie? You've been really quiet and seem kind of down. I wanted to make sure you're fine."
You were touched that Yunseo was making an effort to reach out to you but were also worried that you were being too obvious about your struggles. "I'm fine. Just stressed about competing." A simple yet honest answer would surely suffice.
Yunseo raised her eyebrows, unconvinced by your answer. Your constant slumped shoulders and downcast eyes were a clear indication that you weren't feeling well both physically and mentally. Nevertheless, she dropped the topic, opting to respect your answer rather than prying for more information. "That's valid. This might not mean much to you but I know you're gonna do amazing like always. You've never placed off the podium since you moved up to the senior level and you're only getting better from here. If there's anybody on our team who's gonna walk away with an Olympic medal, it's you."
"Thanks, Yunnie. I really appreciate that you're looking out for me even if you're stressed about your events." You smiled.
She paused in the middle of the sidewalk, wrapping her arms around your torso before pulling you into a tight hug. "I'm proud of you for making it this far, unnie."
The rest of the group stopped in front of you, confused as to why the two of you were sharing a sentimental moment in the streets of Tokyo. They glanced at one another before continuing to walk past, only having eyes for the luxury stores lined up one after another.
Yunseo pulled away before cupping your face with her hands. "You'll do great. Remember: you're a gold medal favorite. You're going to walk away with an Olympic medal."
'You're a gold medal favorite. You have to walk away with an Olympic medal.'
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You jolted awake, immediately pushing yourself upright. Your head whipped back and forth as you tried to make sense of where you were and why you weren't in your own bedroom. After a few seconds, you came to the realization that you were in the Olympic Village. A heavy sigh escaped your lips as you calmed yourself down, checking the time on your phone. It was seven in the morning and you had a few hours until your final practice before the all-around individual event. A sense of dread flooded you as you thought about how your first Olympics competition was right around the corner. Despite having an empty stomach, you were quite nauseous and felt the need to throw up.
The past week in Tokyo had been miserable, to say the least. Your practices hadn't been the greatest and your coaches were getting frustrated with you. The days leading up to the Olympics had been filled with failed routines and they assumed you would be fine once you landed in Tokyo. Their assumptions were wrong, however, and you found yourself struggling to make it through a clean routine. Your hopes of getting an Olympic medal seemed to be getting slimmer and slimmer. Despite your constant mistakes, your coaches still had hope that you would end up somewhere on the podium. After all, you had never placed lower than third in any competition since you moved up to the senior level.
You had a quiet morning to yourself as you got ready for the day, which only made your nerves worse. Hundreds of thoughts and scenarios flew through your mind, countless 'what ifs?' taunting you. At breakfast, the only thing you could do was stare at your food and play around with it while your teammates happily conversed amongst one another, seemingly unbothered by the tense situation all of you were in. They spared worried glances at you, taking turns to urge you to eat and ask if you were okay. You ate a quarter of your breakfast before scurrying off to practice, avoiding the concerned glances of your teammates.
Fortunately, your body and mind cooperated with you enough to have a decent last practice. It certainly wasn't the best practice of your career but you felt significantly better than you had for the past few months. At this point, any feeling of positivity was enough to get you through the games and you were desperate enough to hold onto any optimism you could.
"Representing the Republic of Korea, Y/N, Y/L/N!"
To say you were intimidated to perform on the uneven bars after Suni Lee was an understatement. Everybody in the gymnastics community knew Suni Lee and everybody also knew that uneven bars were her strong suit. She was currently one of the best, if not the best gymnasts on uneven bars, and you were given the misfortune of competing right after her. It didn't help that uneven bars were not your forte whatsoever.
You took a deep breath, trying to calm your wildly pounding heart. You stared up at the high bar above you, taunted by a simple wooden rod that you had learned to use years ago. Your uneven bars routine was something you perfected long ago yet you were still terrified. Before you could second guess yourself, you launched yourself up to the high bar with the vault, performing your routine on complete autopilot mode.
The strength it took for uneven bars was unbelievable. Trying to build your muscles to be able to rotate your body 360 degrees and throw yourself between both bars was excruciating. Your hands were covered in callouses from your hands constantly dragging across the wooden surface, a symbol of the hard work you put in for the past seventeen years. Your combinations weren't as impressive as Suni's but it was enough to put your score on par with hers. You landed on the ground perfectly, putting your hands up with a smile to indicate the end of your performance.
"Wonderful job, Y/N. That was fantastic." Your coach gave you a high-five.
You were halfway through the all-around event, with beam and floor remaining. You specialized in beam for half of your career before you came to the sudden realization that floor routines were much more exciting. Having your strongest routines during the latter half of the event allowed you to make up for any points you may have lost during vault and uneven bars.
Throughout the entirety of the event, you were competing head-to-head with Suni and Rebeca Andrade. Going into the Olympics, you knew they would be your top competition but severely underestimated their skills. You assumed at least one of the events would be their weakness but they were perfecting every one of their routines.
"This is where you have to do the best, Y/N. If you score well on your floor routine, you can place first overall because you have an advantage in your technical skills. Whether or not you leave with an Olympic title depends on your performance." Your coach squeezed your shoulders.
All she got in return was a tight smile. If there was one thing your coach was good at other than helping you improve your gymnastics skills, it was giving you advice and words of encouragement that made you feel worse than when you started. You simply gave her a nod before moving to the corner of the spring floor where you would begin your performance. Yunseo and Seojeong were dispersed on opposite corners of the floor as they insisted you needed full support on all sides. After your name was announced, you took your place on the mat with a faux smile while waiting for the music to start.
Your first skill was a Dos Santos II, which was something you had been practicing for two years. It was by far the most difficult technique you had learned and your coach was extremely hesitant in allowing you to add it to your floor routine, let alone allow you to learn it. Daiane Dos Santos was the only gymnast who had landed it in a competition and there was a reason for that. Regardless, you begged your coach to practice it and had been attempting it in the past two competitions. They had yet to be landed cleanly but you did execute the skill perfectly during countless practices. If you weren't confident in landing it in competition, you wouldn't have wanted to attempt it at the Olympics.
A Dos Santos II consisted of an Arabian double salto in a stretched position with a level H rating. Simply landing this skill would put your technical score miles ahead of your competitors and could even guarantee an Olympic title. You knew you wouldn't be happy with yourself if you left Tokyo without at least attempting it. Since it was your opening skill, you didn't have much time to mentally prepare for it. The most you could do was take deep breaths and focus on the music to keep you on time.
The Dos Santos II was over before you could process it. By the time you launched yourself into the air, you were already back on your feet ready to move onto the next part of your routine. Everything happened so quickly that you couldn't celebrate landing one of the most difficult moves in gymnastics. You could vaguely hear your coach and teammates scream in the background but their voices were muffled. The rest of your routine was filled with skills you could complete in your sleep, which left you in your ending posing before you knew it.
With a heavy sigh, your shoulders immediately slackened as you dropped your ending pose. You bowed to the audience before hopping off of the springboard where your coach and teammates were waiting.
"That was amazing, Y/N! That Dos Santos was beautiful, it was the best you ever landed it." Your coach beamed.
"I can't believe I actually landed it." You grinned, happiness overtaking you for the first time since the competition began. "It happened so quickly and it doesn't even feel like I attempted it."
Seojeong and Yunseo pulled you into a hug, forcing you to jump up and down with them. They each squealed unintelligible exclamations in your ear, rambling about the Dos Santos II and how well you performed.
"Great job, Y/Nie." Hanseok patted your head. "You have a big chance at winning gold!"
His words caused you to freeze for a split second. You whipped your head toward the screen that was displaying the current rankings before you performed. You waited with bated breath as the judges calculated your final score, taking their time as it was the final performance of the night. A slow-motion playback of your routine was on the jumbo screen and while you may sound cocky, surely you were going to score the highest with how well you performed.
"The scores please for Y/N Y/L/N."
Yunseo squealed and clung onto your shoulders with a death grip. "Oh, I'm so scared and I'm not even the one who performed."
You needed to score higher than 13.7 points to place first to make up for the points you didn't acquire during vault and uneven bars. Suni was sitting comfortably in first place with a higher chance of winning the Olympic title but your Dos Santos II was close to leaving her in second place. You were relying on your technical score to push you into first place.
"Y/N Y/L/N has received a score of 13.933 points."
It certainly wasn't your highest score but it was enough to put you in first place. The jumbo screen flashed the final ranking up on the screen with your name at the very top.
A breath you didn't know you were holding escaped from your lips as your score popped up on the screen. You scored well enough on your floor routine to put you into first place; you were returning to Korea with an Olympic medal. All of the stress that had been burdening you finally disappeared and for the first time in months, you felt like you could breathe.
"Fantastic job, Y/N! You did wonderful!" Your coach patted your shoulder and gave you a tight hug.
Your teammates came running over, tackling you into a hug that left all of you in a pile of limbs. You were at the bottom of the pile, trying to hug them back while simultaneously struggling to breathe. Jeahwan, bless his heart, took notice of you turning purple and immediately pulled your teammates off of you.
A giggle escaped your lips at your excitement as they yanked you off the ground only to pull you into another hug. The pressure you felt throughout the season slowly dissipated, leaving you in a state of bliss.
Until the individual floor event, at least.
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"I think I'm gonna throw up." You mumbled, unable to suppress the nausea that was overtaking you.
Yunseo's eyes widened in alarm. "Do you need a bucket?"
"No, I'm just dramatic."
Your teammates rolled their eyes before Junho smacked the back of your head. "You need to get therapy for this, I'm so serious." He scolded.
The situation at hand felt all too familiar. You couldn’t wrap your head around the fact that you were competing again as a finalist for the floor event. There were only eight gymnasts who qualified for the final round and you placed first in the qualification round a little over a week prior. You were the last gymnast to compete in the event which left you in a puddle of nerves by the time you were warming up and preparing to perform.
Your floor routine was similar to the one you performed during the all-around individual event but your opening combination was different. You had a new skill you had been practicing for the past three years and worked hard to perfect it so you could perform it at the Olympics. You hoped it would be recognized as a new skill and be added to the Code of Points after the Olympics were over. Alongside of dreaming to be an Olympian, you also dreamed of having an official skill named after you.
"You have to lock in immediately, Y/N. Don't let your surroundings distract you or hinder you from putting on your best performance. If you land your opening skill and perform cleanly, you'll end up in first place. I guarantee it." Your coach squeezed your shoulders.
"Don't let us down, Y/N."
Quite honestly, you had been doing a good job pushing away the pressure that loomed over you since you arrived in Tokyo. After the medal ceremony for the all-around event, the initial nerves and pressure you felt disappeared since you got into the swing of things. You were even looking forward to competing but your coach's words sent you spiraling and now you were back to square one.
What did she mean by "us"? Your entire coaching team? Your teammates? Your home country was watching you in anticipation as you prepared to perform on the biggest stage in the world? She could be talking about anybody and everybody and the mere thought made you sick.
With no time to contemplate her words, you forced yourself to walk out onto the floor with a smile on your face. You waved to the audience, who seemed to be cheering louder than ever.
"Representing the Republic of Korea, Y/N Y/L/N."
You positioned yourself in the same corner you always began your routine in and took a final deep breath before waiting for your music to start. Just like always, your body went on autopilot mode as you prepared for your new skill.
You could hear your teammates and coaches screaming as you launched yourself into the air, flipping and turning before landing heavily on your feet with a loud thud. Your arms went up as you straightened yourself out, the opening skill being landed cleanly. You cruised through the rest of the performance with ease, nailing every single skill that was left as they were all ones you were familiar with.
Once you held your ending pose for a few seconds, your body dropped to the ground as your head fell into your hands. You tried to process what happened, unable to believe you cleanly landed a skill nobody else had landed, and performed the rest of your routine flawlessly. You pushed your exhausted body off of the springboard and stood up to acknowledge the audience before joining your coach and teammates.
"Holy shit, Y/N! That was absolutely insane." Sunghyun swept you off of the ground before your feet could even touch the ground from the spring board, spinning you around in a tight hug.
"Put her down, you big oaf." Seojeong smacked his beefy arm. "She just threw herself around in the air and your first instinct is to spin her around? She's going to throw up on you.
Sunghyun listened to his junior and immediately placed you on the ground with a ruffle of your hair. The rest of your teammates surrounded you, taking turns to congratulate you and gushing endlessly about your performance. Your coach barely praised you before the speakers were crackling back to life for your final score.
"Y/N Y/L/N has earned a total score of 15.566."
It wasn't the best score seen at the Olympics but it was much higher than your own personal record. Your mouth fell open as the numbers flashed onto the jumbo screen, unable to believe what your eyes were reading. Your vision was obscured by a body throwing itself against you as you were pulled into a hug for the umpteenth time. You lost count of how many times you were squeezed in a hug but knowing you had a wonderful support system warmed your heart. The past few weeks in Tokyo had been nothing short of grueling so you were thankful that your teammates did whatever they could to support you despite having to focus on their own events.
There was a half-hour break before the medal ceremony and every single second was filled with interviews and photos. You never had so many cameras and microphones shoved into your face in your entire life which made winning an Olympic title more overwhelming. You couldn't process what was happening but the more questions you were asked about how you felt, the bigger the pit in your stomach became.
Before you knew it, you were preparing for the medal ceremony. As the lights in the stadium dimmed, a familiar sense of dread washed over you. You gulped nervously and fiddled around with your fingers while watching members of the Olympic committee set up for the ceremony. You felt the same sickness in your stomach during the medal ceremony for the all-around individual event but chalked it off as being exhausted from practicing extensively. You hoped you would be excited for the floor medal ceremony since you won a medal for your specialty but you were feeling even worse than you did a week ago.
"And the Olympic gold medalist from the Republic of Korea, Y/N Y/L/N!"
Straightening your back with a deep breath, a smile forced its way onto your face as you waved to the cheering crowd. Before you stepped onto the podium, you bowed to the audience and hugged Jade Carey and Rebecca Ferrari, who were the silver and bronze medalists.
You nervously eyed the president of the International Gymnastics Federation as she walked over to you with a big smile on your face. She shook your head before placing the gold medal around your neck, congratulating you for your stellar performance. It felt wrong to accept the medal from her when all you wanted to do was rip it off of your neck and give it to Jade instead.
"Ladies and gentlemen, the 2020 Olympic floor medalists!"
The sight of the Korean flag being raised amidst the American and Italian flags was a sight you never thought you would dread to see. Winning an Olympic title was your dream but at one point did it stop? When did you start hating the sport you dedicated your entire life to?
As you stood on the podium with your hand on your chest as the Korean national anthem heard distantly in your ears, you realized that gymnastics was no longer your passion. The gold medal hanging around your neck felt heavy and it felt as if it tied you to a stone to leave you dropping into the middle of the ocean. Your ears were ringing and your head was spinning, your heart started to beat faster from the overwhelming sensation of being in an undeserving position.
Who were you to claim the Olympic gold medal when you no longer cared for gymnastics? The girls next to you worked equally as hard, perhaps even harder to become an Olympic champion and here you were, preparing to draft your retirement statement rather after returning home. You spent almost the entirety of your life working to make it to the Olympics but with the Olympic title finally in the palm of your hand, you felt nothing short of empty.
Even as you were hugged by your teammates and coaches after the Olympic medal ceremony, you felt empty. A fake smile was pasted on your face during every interview and press conference to hide your conflicted feelings. What would the public say if there was even the slightest hint of displeasure on your face? You would be painted as an ungrateful, undeserving Olympic champion; the last thing you needed was your name dragged through the mud. Millions of people in South Korea rooted, supported, and cheered for you ever since you began to make a name for yourself within the last few years. You were obligated to show your appreciation even if it ate away at you inside.
"You're an Olympic champion again, unnie!" Seojeong squealed, holding your hands as she jumped up and down.
You jumped up and down with her, trying to share her excitement as she rambled about how the two of you would be going home with Olympic medals, a life long dream finally accomplished.
"I'm so happy!" You smiled, squeezing her hands gently. "And I'm so proud of you, Seojeongie. You did amazing."
She smiled, pouting before pulling you into a hug. "I'm proud of you too, unnie. So proud. I know the past couple of years haven't been easy on you but you did amazing. I'm happy and honored that I get to call you my teammate."
Your coach gave you a hug next, swaying you from side to side as she held you tightly. She then pulled away, smiling tearfully at you which shocked you. In the six years you had been training with her, she never once shed a single tear. You didn't know she was capable of showing any emotion beyond stoicism but she had been shocking you constantly since arriving in Tokyo.
"Coach, are you crying?" A bewildered expression broke out on your face as your coach let out a sob.
"Oh my Y/Nie, I can't believe you're a two-time Olympic champion." She wiped the tears off of her face, fanning her face to compose herself. "I know the past few years have been extremely difficult for you but you've done well. I'm so proud of you and there's nobody more deserving to win that title than you."
Guilt once again overtook you, seizing you by the neck with a tight grip. You exhaled deeply in a poor attempt to get your feelings back in check, worried that she would notice your distressed state. You hugged her back with a laugh to mask how you were truly feeling about your Olympic title.
The endless praises and congratulations were only making you feel worse about the entire situation. You weren't sure what was wrong with you and you absolutely hated how you felt but you couldn't shake off the guilt that came with the medal. It felt heavier and heavier by the second.
You were able to walk away from the Olympics with two gold medals but at what cost?
89 notes · View notes
kikikigrah · 3 days
Text
unlikely duo
lando norris x singer!yn
summary: following y/n, an international superstar, invited by mclaren to attend the monaco gp. after that, it’s all go from there with a certain no.4 driver.
faceclaim: jazmyn makenna!
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yourusername posted
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liked by mclaren, landonorris, and 1,392,902 others.
yourusername omggg! thank you so much for having me @ mclaren this has been a life long dream. the little girl in me is sooo happy, and i had THEEEEE most fun! mclaren girl until i die. 🥹
78,628 comments
mclaren Guys shut up, y/n y/l/n is officially a part of the papaya fam! 🧡
liked by yourusername
user1 THIS IS THE CROSSOVER I DIDN’T KNOW I NEEDED!!!
—> user2 wdym girl y/n has been saying she was a fan of f1 since before you could talk 😭
user3 do we think she’s a lando girlie or an oscar girlie?
—> landonorris Obviously Lando.
—> user4 AGHHHHH HE REPLIED TO YOUR COMMENT!!
—> user5 Lando being messy as usual. 😭
f1 Was y/n here for us or were we here for her?
user6 she’s really doing every side quest to avoid dropping a new album.
—> user7 WE ARE HUNGRY GIRLLLL
user8 lando’s comment… let him cook.
—> user9 So true give y/n a good man for once.
—> user10 y’all are MADDD weird, they literally just met y/n went to ONE race.
—> user11 @ user10 they’ve been following each other wayyy before she went to this race.
—> user12 I’m here for it.
f1wagupdates posted
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56,892 likes
f1wagupdates International music sensation y/n y/l/n was spotted in a club in Monaco during this summers off season with Lando Norris, having preformed in Paris the night prior. The two were reportedly seen both arriving and leaving together.
8,397 comments
user8 I WAS RIGHT WHEN I SAID SO IN MAY SHUT UP OH MY GOD.
—> user 13 Can you be right about a P1 for Lando next?
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landonorris uploaded a photo to their story
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yourusername posted
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Liked by landonorris and 1,003,893 others
yourusername monacoooo baby, best week of my life!!!! will be back asap <3
45,903 comments
user14 SHUT UP THE LAST PHOTO, LANDO WAS ON A BOAT TWO DAYS AGOOOO
—> user15 y/nDO IS REALLL!!!
—> user16 HOW IS THE PAPARAZZI NOT CATCHING THESE TWO?
—> user17 @ user16 just a normal day in monaco 😭😭😭😭
madisonbeer come back to LA girl i miss u 🥹
—> yourusername ily bby see u soon!
—> user18 y/nson stronger than y/ndo could EVER BE!
—> user19 WHERE IS THE COLLAB?
liked by yourusername
liked by madisonbeer
landonorris I’ll show you around next time?
—> yourusername if you’re driving!
—> user20 LANDO STOP ACTING AS IF YOU WEREN’T ALREADY DOING THAT!
—> user21 why are we being gaslighted rn.
user22 drop the album queen!
y/n_updates posted
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liked by carlossainz55, and 973,893 others.
y/n_updates Y/n spotted last night in her current home city of LA getting cosy with Formula One driver Lando Norris. The two have been interacting on social media, and have been rumoured to be dating since they appeared to have first met in May.
Y/n has not been involved with anyone romantically since her whirlwind romance with the rising star Jacob Elordi last year. Elordi is believed to be the mystery man she was referring to in her hit song ‘ballad of broken promises’.
Read more about the singer and her supposed new flame through the link in our bio.
69,683 comments
user23 WE HEAR NOTHING ABOUT THEM IN MONTHS AND THEN SUDDENLY GET THE CLUB IN MONACO AND THIS?!
user24 y/nDO IS CONFIRMED
user25 omg his outfit… girlfriend effect at its finest. 🙏
—> user26 still had to keep the cap though 💀
user27 jacob elordi to lando norris… they couldn’t be more different from each other 😭
—> user28 that’s what i was thinking, the height is the first thing!
—> user29 mother has amazing taste 😩
—> user30 @ user29 ik u didn’t just say that having listened to ballad of broken promises 💀💀
user31 THE WAY CARLOS LIKED THIS POST IM SCREAMING!!!!
—> user32 HIS BEST FRIEND JUST CONFIRMED IT HAHAHHAHAHAHAHA
user33 CARLOS SAINZ STIRRING THE POT
user34 omg my girl has a man 🥹 i am so so happy for her if they are official
user35 Am i the only one who has never heard of Lando 😭
—> user36 UMM YES 💀
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yourusername posted
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liked by madisonbeer, landonorris, and 2,389,683 others.
yourusername i am super excited to announce that my new single ‘high-heeled sweetheart’, ft my bestest friend @ madisonbeer , will be coming out next friday! i had so much fun making this track, and i’m sooo super proud of it. thank u to all the beautiful ppl out there who keep making this dream of mine possible. i just want to hug each and every one of you. <33
and a special thank you to @ landonorris for taking the beautiful photo i now get to use as the cover for this song. you’re incredible! :)
96,682 comments
user37 SO LAST NIGHT WE GET THE Y/N X LANDO PICS IN LA, AND TODAY WE GET A SONG DROP.
—> user38 AND HE TOOK THE COVER PHOTO
—> user39 i fucking love the cover but it’s so risqué, they are 100% dating.
—> user40 THE :) FACE OH I AM SICK!
madisonbeer my ANGEL!! I loved finally working with you
—> yourusername thank you for being here with me every step of the way madi
mclaren We will be streaming this song as soon as it comes out. 🧡
liked by yourusername
user41 the way she still hasn’t adressed the dating rumours, queen shit.
—> user42 she don’t need to, the pics are confirmation enough. 😭
landonorris y/n called me incredible, #winning.
—> yourusername lando norris noticed ME #winning.
—> user43 ARE Y’ALL GONNA COME OUT AND TELL US UR DATING OR DO WE NEED TO FORCE IT OUT OF YOU?
—> user44 MOTHER AND FATHER?
iamrebeccad will be listening on friday! so happy for you ✨
—> yourusername i absolutely adore you 🥹
—> user45 HIS BEST FRIENDS GIRLFRIEND IS EVEN COMMENTING NOW!
—> user46 oh theyre locked in.
108 notes · View notes
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yayyyy 💕 then can i ask for a scenario in which the reader, who’s a trans guy, volunteering to be the bride in the ghost groom scenario and threatening to stab anyone who says anything about him looking like a girl with platonic feng xin + mu qing and romantic hualian? (or just xie lian, since technically hua cheng is only there for like, .5 seconds lol)
(💥 anon)
Masculine Bride?
HuaLian x ftm(?)reader
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IM SO SORRY 😔 I'VE HAD THE WORST FEW MONTHS OF MY LIFE BUT I LIVE I WILL BE COMPLETING REQUESTS AGAIN THANKS FOR NOT GIVING UP ON ME AGAIN GUYS ☺️🖤
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☀️Feng Xin didn't want to be in this ridiculous mission at all. He has to deal with Mu Qing in disguise and he has to see Xie Lian who was once his best friend. So it feels a little awkward to him but he gets to see you too! So he's quite happy to see you and Xie Lian again
☀️When he finds out that the plan is to disguise as a bride he immediately says Nuh uh. No way he's doing that, Mu Qing would never live it down.
☀️But when you offer to disguise as the bride, since you do looke somewhat androgynous he's like great!
☀️He doesn't have to do it and he can protect you if you all get in harms way
☀️Honestly he's surprised you volunteered so quickly. Feng Xin knows you'd rather stay in your male form and he knows you don't like appearing feminine much these days. Gods do it all the time so Feng Xin doesn't mind. Have you seen Shi Qingxuan?
☀️So everything was going great, they got you dressed and the one village girl did your makeup so you didn't look like a clown. But then they ran into those annoying men again.
☀️ They were congratulating Xie Lian, Mu Qing, and Feng Xin for finding a pretty bride and even wanted to join up, but they all knew the men just wanted to eat off their success.
☀️So when you laughed and explained you did make a good bride even though you're a man, No one really laughed. The men had genuinely thought you were a woman sooo they try to call your bluff.
☀️You did in fact change forms to look more like a bride but it doesn't feel good to have every single feminine feature to be pointed out. You're used to it so you weren't going to say anything but the group of men freeze and their skin pales when you hear a crack behind you
☀️Feng Xin may or may not have broken a pillar. May or may not have damaged his own temple. . .
☀️it succeeds in shutting the men up because what man is able to just break a God's pillar?!
☀️Feng Xin has to admit he's pretty irritable, but hearing the group of men bully you just pisses him off. He knows he's supposed to be in disguise and not gain your attention but he can't stand by and watch you be passive about it.
☀️ When the men practically evacuate the area you only laugh softly and link arms with him saying, "I found my guard!" You already know it's Feng Xin🙄
🌕Mu Qing was also your best friend and you never really gave him the chance to distance himself from you like he distanced himself from Xie Lian.
🌕Mu Qing has been with you a long time and he knows you're more comfortable identifying as a man. He has no issue with it. It took some time getting used to but he doesn't care as long as you're happy.
🌕so hearing the group of men start pointing you out so blatantly ticks him off. He knows he can't harm mortals but he sure wishes he could.
🌕It's not against the rules to threaten them though, so when he threatened to cut off their hand because it's rude to point isn't against the rules either.
🌕You were surprised honestly, Mu Qing doesn't care about a lot of things and doesn't usually get violent unless it's with Feng Xin.
🌕but you laugh when the group of men run off and you lean on Mu Qing. Saying you're so happy to have your own personal protector
🪷Xie Lian doesn't really fight. It's not that he can't he just doesn't see a point to do so.
🪷but that doesn't mean he'll let people bully you either
🪷 You've stuck with him for awhile so you're used to just taking mean words in stride. Xie Lian has never let them get away with it though.
🪷So it comes as a Surprise to you all when Xie Lian uses rou'ye to tie the group of men up together and he "advised them to go away before something unfortunate happens"
🪷You smiles and kiss his cheek, linking arms with him with a smile.
🪷"You're cute when you're protective"
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burning-academia-if · 19 hours
Note
I'm so sorry for all the notifications lmao I'm going around liking every ask because i haven't been on the page for a bit. And why the fuck is all the asks making me like Lars. I don't want to like Lara because Lara doesn't want to like my MC.. i already have enough problems with Rook 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️
I need to stay away from these problematic ROs. 😭
Oh quessssstiiioooon someone's probably asked this before but I've seen it on a few blogs. But since magic is obvs a thing. If someone cursed MC or gave them something that could only be broken by true love's kiss (especially since mc doesn't really have the healthiest relationship with those they are close to so who would think they could break a spell like that)
and it's after they've confessed to the ROs. How would they react to MC not waking up at first after they kissed them... but waking up after they've started having a major meltdown after all?
If you have gotten this ask could i please have a link because finding anything on tumblr is... 😒
And i literally fall in love with this goddamn IF every time i read anything on this page. It's a curse in itself... I hope you have a lovely weekend 🤣😇💜
Omg never apologize for mass liking, that's literally anyone on Tumblr's lifeblood lol
Also you know, I feel like Lars, despite being the biggest asshole of the ROs, is still less of a handful then Rook lmfaO good luck with dealing with them!
Also I have not been asked this one before! Felt very inspired it with, so I turned it into a prompt!
Rook:
            You’re so still against the touch of his lips. You’re still even after he pulls away. His chest buzzes so loud it echoes in his ears. You don’t move, not even the flutter of your lashes and he should have known. How can he be your true love, when he spent so many years running away?
            Whoever it is, would look you in the eyes when you said you loved them. They’re someone who would have taken you in their arms instead of turning away again and again. He sinks to his knees, hands clutching at the side of the bed where you lay. Tears burn at his eyes, but not a single one falls.
            Even before he made this foolish decision, he knew. All that’s left is to find the one could wake up. If you’re life lays in the hands of someone else, a fact he always knew, then so be it.
            He’ll let you go, like he should have so long ago. He will. He just needs another moment here with you before he turns away. He needs to hear your heartbeat and the cadence of your breathing for one last time.
            Time passes as slow as honey, thick and opaque. His body is listless. In the silence, your breath catches and he blinks. Turns. You take another shaky breath, and when your eyes open, he’s on his feet.
            “MC!” He gathers you in his arms, holding on tight. “Oh, thank god. I thought I lost you. I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.”
            His forehead falls against your shoulder, and the tears finally fall. Your awake, your body is warm. And maybe, just maybe, he really does have a chance to make things right.
Beck:
            When you don’t move after he pulls away, he doesn’t waver. Magic is strange, it can effect everyone differently, and with how much magic has affected you, he isn’t concerned that there isn’t an immediate response.
            Instead, he takes a seat next to where you lay. He brings his knees up to his chest and tells you about all the things you’ve missed. The first flowers of spring, the new used bookstore that opened up on the corner, school events, and class drama.
            The time ticks down, and it pricks at his heart. He keeps talking. About himself, about his life, about how he first fell for you, about how you are the warmth of the fire on a winter day, and if even if he isn’t your true love, then that’s ok. He’s just so glad he was able to have any time with you at all.
            At some point, his throat is dry and he’s run out of words. What can he say, as the sky turns a dusty orange. He swallows, eyes fluttering closed and feel the first of the tears fall. If it isn’t him to wake you up, then who will it be? And how long will you be cursed to sleep until they find you?
            A world without your laugh is far worse than a world where the two of you aren’t meant to be.
            Then.
            You shift beside him, and he goes still. When he looks, he sees your eyes flutter open, eyebrows furrowing as you look at him.
            “…You’re awake.” He says, voice barely above a whisper. He brushes his fingers against your cheek, so impossibly gently. “You’re awake.”
            He laughs, a watery, trembly sort of laugh, as he runs a thumb against your cheek. You’ll still be with him.
Rhea:
            “Please wake up.” She whispers, kneeling next to you. There is no sign the kiss did anything. It’s fine, this isn’t the end of the world. She has had the logic of magic seared into her brain, and she knows how it works. She’ll wait. She can wait.
            But still, you remain still. She gets up and moves around, to give her body something to do as she waits. She’s not good at that, waiting. She always needs to be in the midst of doing something. Making progress. When something’s out of her hands like this, she feels like she’s in freefall.
            There might be a chance, she thinks as time ticks by, that you and her aren’t the ones for each other. Somehow, it makes the anxious energy in her gut easier to deal with. As long as she doesn’t think of the heartbreak that will hit the moment she leaves your side, it gives her a plan. Something to work towards. Steps to map out to figure out where to go from here and how to wake you up. The process of even finding the one who could do so.
            She’s on step four when your fingers twitch. She goes still in response. All her thoughts scatter. Like a deer in headlights she watches you, wondering if it was just her imagination. But then your body shifts and she’s next to you again, softly calling your name.
            “MC? Can you…can you hear me darling?” When you blink away, she feels a smile bloom despite herself. You’re awake and well and still hers.
Zoe:
            There’s doubt in their chest even before they press a kiss against your lips. For it to be them? They’re not the kind of person who makes it into fairytales. They know this. Stories are the sort of thing they’ve studied their entire life. They exist on the other side of the glass, able to peer in but never able to be.
            As you remain still, they stand and lean back on their heel. Whoever your true love is, it isn’t them. It isn’t that they doubt your love, but it’s hard to imagine that kind of forever for them. If this was the fate they were dealt, then so be it. And even so, you were their first love, and that’s a kind of special whatever comes next can’t take away. Even on different paths, even living different lives, you can both still be a fond memory for the other.
            But god, they’ve never experience heartbreak either or the way it collides into their body and leaves them breathless. They wanted this. Every moment with you was a dream they never thought they’d get a chance to see. They were awkward and clumsy, and they were the luckiest person alive to have been able to met you.
            They press a hand against their mouth, to stop the sob that’s trying to break through them. The image of you blurs as tears collect in their eyes and stream down their cheeks. They squeeze their eyes shut, trying to collect themselves.
            It’s why it startles them, when they feel a hand reaching out, “…Zoe?”
            They choke on a gasp, eyes flying open to see you awake. You’ve pulled yourself up, and your eyes are open. It strikes them so suddenly, they all but throw themselves against you. Any embarrassment they used to feel is gone. They’ll never let themselves hesitate again.
Lars:
            “You would get yourself cursed.” He whispered against your lips as he pulls away. He doesn’t believe in true love or soulmates. For a curse to be based on the concept, it must make it the flimsiest curse to have been made. All it really needs is love and faith and stubbornness. Maybe his faith is lacking, but he sure as hell can make up for it with stubbornness.
            So he waits. He leans his head back, closes his eyes, and wonders how long it will take. His hand toys with your fingers absently. With you asleep, you won’t be able to comment on the display. He still remembers when you said you loved him, the look in your eyes that left no room for doubt. He thought you were making a terrible decision, but he wasn’t one to complain. Your terrible decision, just lead to his great decision to go along with it.
            The time passes slow, but the anxiety never comes. That isn’t who he is. Not when he’s sure about this, or at least more sure about it then whatever magic was used on you. And even if the kiss doesn’t wake you up, he’ll just find whoever cursed you in the first place and make them reap the consequences.
            When he feels your hand move, slipping your fingers between his, he sighs, “About time you got up.”
            “Lars? My hand—”
            “Don’t get used to it.” You laugh, the sound scratchy from sleep, and he feels his body relax. It was nice to have you back.
???:
            They know your souls are too entwined to have a doubt. That doesn’t not mean there won’t be blood on their hands for what was done to you. How dare someone curse the one they love. How dare someone put their hands on you.
            They’re kiss is so painfully soft despite the violent rage in their chest. It’s been so long since they’ve felt this burning under their skin. Did the Curse Giver think you were alone and unloved? Did they not realize you had someone who was entwined with you in every way, down to the way you take a breath.
            The wraiths flicker around them, agitated by the tremble in their body. They keep close to you, body curved as a way to shield you from the rest of the earth. If you don’t wake soon, they’re hands will find a blade, and that blade will find a body. The wraiths whisper amongst each other, as though capable of soothing them.
            “But you were cursed even before this, weren’t you?” They breathe, pressing another kiss to your forehead. You shift beneath them, and when they pull away you open your eyes.
            You say their name, and the sound of it wraps around them. They have a Curse Giver to kill, but for now, they only lay down beside you, and ask if you’re ok. You’ve been asleep for so long, and it took too long to get to you. They’ll never be late again.
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anamelessfool · 2 days
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Outlaw F!Reader x "The Ghoul" Cooper Howard (18+ MDNI) Full Fic here on AO3
Chapter 3: Scamp (AO3 Link Here)
You're not running away from your sins, you're running towards the truth.
The Ghoul has a little shopping list to check off before turning you in.
Tags: Read Em All on AO3 (Dead Dove), Blood and Gore, Gunplay, Broken Bones, Bandits & Outlaws, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Dystopia, Blood and Injury, Light Cannibalism, Is It Sorta Hot He Could Possibly Eat You Or Is That Just Me, Mystery and Intrigue, Western
And now my writing mania returns to the crypt from which it emerged.... reblogs appreciated we loves it om nom nom
Let me know if you'd like to be on the tag list!
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ebonysplendor · 3 days
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psst 👀 you should check out “Where He is King” by mellowbile on itch.io
Hmm...heard 👀
TL;DR: He's a joker, a jester, an absolute clown...but the pain that he puts us through is no joke
That was horrible, I know. I couldn't think of anything else. Plz let me live ._.
Game Link: https://mellowbile.itch.io/where-he-is-king
Notable Features: Nameless MC, Female MC, Demon/God LI(?), Yandere LI(?), Choice-heavy story Spiciness: 0/5 -- Unless you're into the whole dismembered from the inside out thing, then 5/5. No kink shaming here LI(?) Red Flags: 5/5 -- Physically abusive, Torture, Sadist. That's about it, but it's pretty gruesome/vivid stuff
Wanna know more? Not if you're not at least 18! Y'all were good until it got updated a few days or so ago due to the gore. Anyways, if you're part of the 18+ club, let's get into it!
!! C O N T E N T !! !! W A R N I N G !!
He looks more like a jester to me, but it may trigger that whole fear of clowns thing...just a heads up
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So, this one was a request, which I'm always excited about, so of course I had to give it the old college try. To be honest, I saw and played this the same day that I had gotten the request (hence why I wrote the whole "y'all were good until a few days ago" thing, because it was a few days ago at the time), but I really wanted to get that Trembling Essence review out first, and then, I started adulting and lost track of time, and then a month went by, and yeah. Not to mention that I was looking FOREVER for a particular ending; I'll get into that more once the review portion comes along. Anyways.
Now, admittedly, this one wasn't too much of my style but...actually, just take a look at this:
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I actually appreciate the disclaimer because, admittedly, the first thought I had was "This feels gorey for the sake of being gorey", but after remembering what they had said about it being more emotionally charged writing, I realized that it actually was pretty emotionally charged. Like, the writing itself was actually pretty solid and the art? Ugh, I loved the visuals. Those of you who have been rocking with me for some of my reviews know that I get completely undone over sprites, CGs, and all that visual stuff.
Admittedly, I don't really have too much to say in the intro. All that I want to say seems more appropriate for the review portion, so I'm going to go ahead and jump into talking about the game itself. As per typical, I'm going to tell you as much about the game without ruining the game itself.
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So boom.
We're on the run. Well, let me rephrase that: we were on the run, but our ankle is kind've AFK, at the moment, and running isn't really an option right now. Just as a little backstory, the reason why we're trying to get away from him is because everything is literally going to shit, or Hell, more accurately. Villagers are disappearing, children are either becoming runaways or being abducted, and there's this hypnotic music that's (assumed to be) always playing in the background from a taunting distance, being just barely heard. Not long after, a devil -- that was intentional, by the way, because he's not the devil, but a devil. He ain't that special, but he's still dangerous -- catches up to us.
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Friedrich "JunJingl" Marchosias. Yeah, I jumbled the pronunciation of that last name, too, but just know that that's his name lmao.
Naturally, he starts to taunt us, calling us a "broken toy" because our ankle is sprained, and we aren't much for running right now, which makes his pursuit less amusing for him. This wouldn't be such an issue if, one, Sir Jester Douche wasn't a literal psycho and a pretty serious threat, and two, we weren't literally the last human alive. That's right folks: we're what remains of humanity. Okay, well, maybe not that dramatic, but it seems that way because the people that would've been in the surrounding area are either dead or they were a part of his army, but that's not reassuring either because he only took the children for his army -- we're a full grown adult, so our fate isn't looking too good.
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At this point, he's getting pretty pissed at us. That's because he's been talking mad shit this whole time, but we've been silent throughout his whole lil' speech. Like, oh, pardon me for my brain shutting down and putting survival at the top of the list, my good sir.
We indulge in his arrogance briefly, but just long enough for us to stall him while we make a gameplan. Now, here's the thing: if we make a run for it, we're probably going to die because our ankle is pretty messed up, but if we stay and keep talking to this psycho clown...we're probably going to die.
Huh. Okay then. With that being realized...
We bolt. We are outta of there. Point blank period, because it's like, if our chance of death is pretty much inevitable, we may as well make him work for it.
That's kind've falling flat though, because he's right on our tail, and he's not even putting in the effort while doing it. We can't worry about that for too long though, because we hear this music playing and...oh shit.
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It's going from bad to worse. Now, we have to worry about his entire army chasing after us, too. It doesn't matter though because survival is still at the top of the list, no matter how slim or nonexistent the chance may be; we keep running. We run and run and run and run until we get to this well. Granted, it may have been a stupid move, but we actually managed to get a good bit of distance, and we stop to get a drink from the well. Like I said, probably a stupid move, but shit, we don't have much of a chance of survival if we're dehydrated. ...Actually, we don't have much of a chance of survival if we are hydrated, either, but a bitch is thirsty, so we get that damn drink, or so we thought we were going to. What we were expecting was a well full of rainwater.
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It's full of blood.
We don't even have time to be scared before Friedrich pops up behind us. With our survival instincts kicking in, we get on our gangster shit. We notice that the bucket was silver and recall how a lot of the things in the village had been replaced with silver dupes because it could ward off evil. When I say that we got a good ass grip on that silver bucket...
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And absolutely knocked his shit in?! We blasted the hell out of him with that bucket. Look at this man's face.
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Lmao, no babes. Not that face.
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Lol not that one either...
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Ah, yes. We...might have just plummeted our inevitable chance of death to an inevitable certainty of death...
And the story continues from this point, my friends! Actually! This is only one route of ten! Which ending is this you ask? Lol like I'm going to tell you. You'll have to play the game for yourself to find that out. Just be cautious, because it does get a little...messy.
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Okay, so! ...Wasn't really my cup of tea, not gonna lie, but it wasn't bad!
First and foremost, let's get into the visuals of this game. The art was definitely pleasing to look at. Like, ugh, I love CGs and sprites and visual effects and all of that, and this game had a looooot of them. Like, take a little lookie look.
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Chef's kiss work right there. I really, really, really loved the artwork. Definitely my favorite aspect of this game.
Now, like I said in the beginning, the gore was pretty "in your face" and definitely gives the initial impression of being gorey for the sake of being gorey; however, I made sure that I read it with the "emotionally charged" disclaimer in mind. Pleasantly enough, I actually could get that vibe. The dev gave the go-ahead for personal interpretations but, mmm, nah. Even though I'm not the most analytical person, I was going to let you all in on my weird thoughts, but nah, I think I'll pass on that for another day.
Put it this way though, obviously, I took it as a metaphor for being in pain, but hear me out (TRIGGER WARNING FOR SUICIDE BY THE WAY): it's not just physical pain, but that pain that you feel from the inside. You know, that internal pain that's so intense that it feels like it's literally tearing you apart from the inside out. The worst part about that type of pain is that, even though you want to die, there's something that's keeping you alive, and it feels like literal torture. To me, the game was a huge metaphor for fighting to survive but staying alive feels like torture, and you're just left constantly wishing for it to just end -- maybe a sprinkle of being haunted by past mistakes and a possibly wavering faith? (TRIGGER WARNING END). Anyways, that interpretation may make more sense if you decide to actually play it for yourself. Lol I guess I did let you guys in on my thoughts after all. Guess we're getting kinda close at this point, huh?
Also anyways, another reason why it took me so long to post was because for the LIFE of me, I could not frickin figure out how to get ending number 7!! At the time, the game was extremely new. Like, still in the box wrapped in plastic new, and I was like "Shit, I'm on my own, and I'm dumb". I spent so much time and literally revisited the game on different days to see if I had accidentally skipped something and found nothing new. I looked through the files, and I was like "Bro, I've literally seen all of these sprites and CGs. What am I possibly missing?". When I say that it was driving me nuts... BUT THEN! I WENT TO THE GAME PAGE AND I SAW THIS
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OH BLESS IT. I WASN'T BEING AN IDIOT; ENDING 7 JUST DIDN'T EXIST. THE RELIEF THAT I FELT. At the same time though, I was like "...why was there no ending 7?" But minor concern. Very minor.
Overall, the game was pretty damn solid! Lots of gore for sure, and I definitely didn't mind it, but the initial reaction was gore just for the sake of gore; however, when you really give it a chance, the writing's actually pretty okay. My favorite thing about it was by far the art and my other favorite thing was that we got to blast Friedrich's ass with that bucket. That was so satisfying. I mean there were consequences, yeah, but we still got our lick in lmao.
Welp, that's pretty much all from me! I recommended giving it a solid playthrough or two! I recommend it so much, I'll put the link right here so that you can give it a try. Also! Apparently they have a tumblr page for their art, and I'll link that here as well! I didn't see anything for a donation, but if you find otherwise, I'm sure they'd appreciate the monetary support. If you're broke, like me, send them some encouraging words and let them know "Hey, you did a thing, and I think that you should continue to do that thing because you're pretty good at it!"
But yeah, I'm going to end it here so that way I can FINALLY get this posted! Sorry for being MIA for a little. Adulting really be adulting, and I am ill-prepared for it a lot of the time ^^;
Anyways! Remember to drink water, don't be dumb, and hope to see you around~!
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Where He Is King
Dev's Art Tumblr
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pfhwrittes · 2 months
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Dealing Drugs and Feelings Masterlist
18+ ONLY Please read the trigger warnings on each instalment!
the post that inspired the au + the post i reblogged afterwards my thoughts on the original post john price headcannon simon riley headcannon kyle garrick headcannon john mactavish headcannon thought (bullet points) drabble set in ddaf universe + a follow up dealing drugs and feelings tag for asks, drabbles and inspiration
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sundial-bee-scribbles · 5 months
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flower hivemind au masterpost (so far)
aight this is long overdue lmao
before i start anything off everyone give a big thanks to @olliesneweyes who's the one who originally came up w/ all these ideas, i'm just the one who posted the asks hskjghkg
below the cut i've linked p much every important post related to info abt this au, though you also should be able to find any relevant stuff under the #flower hivemind au tag on this blog lolol. this might still be messy and so is navigating my blog rip but it should be a better place to find everything
tldr; vocaloid au where flower is a type of hivemind plant parasite thing that's capable of "flowerizing" other people to assimilate them into the hivemind. len tries his best to not let his friends get killed.
content warnings for mentions/depictions of blood&gore, drugging, cannibalism(??)
first mentions of au + initial concepts:
1 -> 1st mention
2 -> (elaboration on previous: spreading thru pollen/spores, ciflower)
3,4 -> cordyceps inspiration, more about drugging & spores
more importantish main plot stuff:
targeting fukase (+ brief elaboration)
trapped in closet scenario: 1, 2
len being the final girl
first mention of the ending
expanded game mechanics/events: main flowers & memesquad boys, primary gameplay style, piko&fukase encounter (+elaboration1, elaboration2), initial notes on oliver & moke, ciflower&fukase encounter (+elaboration), flowerization tied to assimilation tactics, other survivor povs, oliver & moke getting flowerized (+elaboration1, elaboration2), more notes on oliver (+elaboration)
defective flower: 1, 2, 3
james: 1, 2,
hivemind motivations
don't take them from the garden/remind them of their past
do the spores glow
bonus stuff:
rin gets munched
waltz of malice connections
flowerized!piko concept doodle
oliver post w/ funny tags
fear garden vibes
iku
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sweetlilbird · 1 year
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♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤
☆Welcome to my blog☆
Hello! I'm sweetlilbird, but you can also call me Gray!
I'm a 27 year old writer, who dabbles mainly in fan fiction, but I hope to post some of my original work someday soon! I currently only write for Undertale/Deltarune, but in the future I will be expanding into other fandoms!
☆Current Fics☆
○ Where The Daffodils Grow [Mature] (Papyrus/Reader Reverse Harem)
● And The June Bugs Sing [Mature] (Sans/Reader Reverse Harem) *temporary hiatus*
○ Kinktober 2022 [Explicit] (VariousAUs/Reader)
● All of The Stars [Mature] (Sans/Reader & Papyrus/Reader Reverse Harem)
☆Completed Works☆
○ Progress Is Not Linear [T+] (Papyrus/Reader)
● Cash It In [Explicit] (Swapfell Papyrus/Reader)
○ The Gasters Ratchet Salon [T+] (All Sanses & Papyri/Reader)
● A Strong Start [T+] (Fellswap Gold Papyrus/Self Insert(Reader))
☆Discord Server☆
Sweetlilbird's roost (16+)
I do have an 18+ channel on that server, but I require proof of age in order to let users into that.
☆Commission Info☆
COMISSIONS ARE CLOSED!
☆Frequently Used Tags☆
○ sweetlilbird rambles (all of my ramblings go here)
● sweetlilbirdart (rarely used but hey, I do draw sometimes!)
○ I tag all of my fics with their titles!
☆Current Status☆
○ Slowly coming back from a long hiatus! 🎉
♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤
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camarilla-intuition · 24 days
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TMNT Iteration Masterpost
More specific title pending, story subject to change since it’s in a kind of draft phase. I keep both this personal blog and an art only blog for my personal organization so know that links will be on both Camarilla-intuition and Camarilla-arts. No current update schedule, new content will be sporadic!
There is something Wrong with the world, with the timeline, our heros are missing, seemingly unwritten from the story! Since this doesn’t stop the chaos of New York, four different turtle siblings find themselves with the choice to save the city from the shadows and maybe even figure out the mystery of what has changed the world so intrinsically along the way.
TLDR: I am so fascinated by so many of the side, and sometimes concept only, characters in tmnt franchise so enjoy my concept of tmnt world but the main heros and antagonists aren’t there, a what if that lets me pull Venus, Slash, Kirby, and Frida into the spot light.
Catch all tag Art only tag
Comic Prologue: 1 , 2
Character concepts:
Refs and line up for main 4 turtles
Who is Missing?
Cats?
Aliens/Kraang/sketchy Shadow and Splinter
Subprime Hunter
Subprime Hound
Thank you!!!!!
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phoenixcatch7 · 11 months
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Lmaoooo okay so MAJOR story spoilers ahead-
But I just finished the crisis at hyrule castle quest line (after thorough googling that I wasn't going into the final boss, of course) and went back to the landing where everyone gathered to discuss what to do next.
It was all very solemn and thoughtful, everyone theorising and letting it sink in how incredibly dangerous ganon was, and then purah and riju are like 'omg there was a sixth sage maybe we can find whatever they've left behind maybe it can help us' and then Link IMMEDIATELY speaks up like 'oh yeah about that I've already found her. Yeah she's fine she's going to help us. I've also got the master sword too by the way'.
Everyone was SHOOK. I got praise and amazement from all sides. Purah was like 'ALREADY???!! And you didn't think to TELL ME??' it was great.
Never felt more like canon link in my life. I've got a screenshot of everyone's :O?! face. Going to be riding that high for hours XD.
But it's very impressive that I managed to procrastinate so hard I managed to skip about three major plot lines just by squirrelling my way where I'm not supposed to be purely by accident lmao.
#totk spoilers#<- MAJOR ONES#loz#legend of zelda#tears of the kingdom#totk#loz totk#loz tears of the kingdom#Purah: I can't believe what we're up against. And how hard it must have been! But you're so calm and collected about it!#Me: aw thanks keep talking ^^#Purah: you're really a wonder link. I'm amazed by what you can do! It's up to us now! Let us help you!! ✌️#Ngl finding the thunder head heart door was pure. PURE chance. It was night and I couldn't see the arrow head on links bow#Pouring rain and thunder. Somehow managed to blindly claw my way to the top of the ruin and spent ages trying to find out what it was#At the very last second before I left I slipped on the side of the wall and fell all the way down. Straight onto the shrine.#Eventually gathered the hearts and came right back to do the whole thing. No idea it was supposed to be a triggered quest until now LMAO#But fr everyone was so shaken after ganons vision and link was just standing there like 🙄 he's already had a dozen of them XD#'pig man should have gone into theatre. Tryna play me with zelda when I know full well where she is. your precious phantoms were RUBBISH'#Seriously don't worry about the fight if you have the vows and decent armour I posed so silly and took several attacks to the spleen#And it did absolutely NOTHING. Several photos of link with phantoms furious heads in view and I lost MAYBE 3 hearts total. No anti gloom!!#I will say the image of broken doll zelda dissolving into gloom smoke will probably traumatise link but what's one more lol
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pluviophile-imagines  ❯  petrichorium
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ladyluscinia · 1 year
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Just had an old post show up in my notes and every single link was broken broken because I evidently had not run them through a browser to try and remove those "at.tumblr..." urls they were doing for a while.
Glad I'm pretty confident I got them off most posts because I guess Tumblr isn't supporting those anymore 🤷‍♀️
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laufire · 2 years
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billiewena birthday boost bash
I’m afraid this is the most involved fandom even I’m going to have time to participate in for a long time, so I’m going all in with the self-promo :P. Happy birthday to you @billiewena​, I hope you enjoyed the weekend!
I prepared a few different lists for this one ^-^
👏 Let 👏 Women 👏 Be 👏 Evil 👏 - AKA the evol misunderstood women of... questionable morals list
Fics:
Jess/Ruby 100 words drabble.
Anna/Ruby 100% canon-compliant one-shot (rated E).
Megstiel Role Reversal.
Edits:
Favourite women + traits.
Favourite women + greek mythology.
Abaddon/Meg graphic.
Amara edits: I, II, III, IV.
LGBT Sam - AKA literally everything I have of him! (read the het stuff as bi Sam, obvs)
Fics:
pre-Castiel/Sam season 4 AU.
Sam + amnesiac!Ruby ficlet.
Castiel/Justin Smith!Sam tripple drabble.
Edits:
Sam dreams of Bela 👀👀👀
Soulless!Sam + Godstiel graphic.
Samwena playlist.
Samruby + Hymn to Demeter.
Sam + Sam Vance Law’s “Faggot”.
MISS BELA TALBOT - I just think she’s neat.
Fics:
-Castiel/Bela s4 AU (WIP, only one chapter out. Likely won’t get the chance to update it until my hiatus is over, around March :/). Bonus: Castiel POV ficlet.
-Bela Lives AU. Series, first one-shot out.
-Bela captures an angel.
Edits:
Deanbela in their Batcat era.
Bela’s last moments in the show.
Bela x John Silver parallels.
Bela x Catwoman parallel.
Demon!Bela graphic.
Miscellaneous - just about anything else.
Castiel edits: I, II, III, IV, V, VI.
Angels week (featuring the hottest apocalypse!Michaels, Anael, Naomi, Anna & Castiel, Miriam, Flagstaff, and Serafina).
Apocalypse!Claire not-fic & graphic.
Vampire!Alex gifset.
s7!Megstiel playlist.
Webweaving and parallels: Castiel x Dorfl (Discworld), Castiel x Jack Rackham (Black Sails), Amara x The Machine (Person of Interest).
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mirasmirages · 1 year
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Oh look! New name! New icon! New colors!
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disteal · 5 months
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So I haven’t talked about this on main before, but the situation in South Gaza has gotten so horrifying that I’m p much throwing caution to the wind to desperately plead for eyes on this. I’m raising awareness about stories from activists in Gaza right now, including one of our own.
My lovely, wonderful friend Swin (aka tumblr user @combaticon) was deployed as a volunteer medic to a Gaza hospital on the 9th.
When the bloodshed started, she heard they needed extra hands in Gaza, she spoke Arabic and had the training, and she went.
I’ve been in contact with her throughout. She’s so incredibly brave it takes my breath away. My heart bleeds for these children she’s taking care of and how resilient they are is… astonishing.
Swin and these poor people have been under siege for so long, and they’re in desperate need of critical supplies. They have to filter water through their clothes, and it’s getting dangerously cold. Foods finally been getting through, but there’s not enough blankets and jackets to go around and there’s no fuel for the generators.
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Their comrades in the West Bank have been completely pushed out by settler thugs. It’s incredibly unsafe to even be doing humanitarian work for Palestinians. Remember this the next time a Zionist tells you they’re doing this to ‘feel safe’. The IOF is arming lynch mobs.
On a personal note, this has been the most gut-wrenching week of my life. Every day when I wake up without a text from her I feel so much fear. I fight back the grief but I don’t know how to help or what to do. It’s terrifying.
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Swin has asked for nothing, absolutely nothing other than something it can show the people around it to make them feel like they’re not going to be abandoned. To make sure they’re not forgotten in some pit praying Rafah opens before Israel decides to slaughter them all.
Today was a bad day. She’s alive but beyond worrying about her privacy now; she’s asked me to share this and to beg that we not lose steam and forget about them. Please share this, and please keep being fucking annoying and loud and digging your heels in with fury because we cannot let these people die silently.
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[Times of Gaza] [QUD network] [Eye on Palestine]
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[link to GCC registration website as the link in this picture is broken]
Please keep in mind that the Global Conscience Convoy is NOT soliciting donations, and registration is to sign up for attendance to the actual event in Cairo. There’s a list of other actions you can do to boost awareness for their protest at Rafah on the website.
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