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sehodreams · 3 months

Text

a good girl's paradox

TW and Tags: plus size!coworker!reader x coworker!lee tang (he changed his name to Gyeong-su in the episode), mentions of violent acts (stalking, killing, bullying), smut, p in v (with protection), fingering, oral sex (f receiving), suicidal thoughts, trauma, related to the series but it changes the storyline for the fic purposes, unclear descriptions of the place (Busan) because I have no interest into learning more geography for a fic.

WC: 10K

Summary: Everyone goes to that province to hide, and you’re not the exception, but it’s also said that everyone wants to leave, and perhaps, you’re the exception to that.

Comment: Sorry guys I know I have a lot of requests and other drafts waiting, but I love this man so much I couldn’t help it, I started it yesterday and finished it today because I've been having so many problems finishing other fics and decided this was not going to be one of those half done. It's long so there are definitely mistakes, please be kind, again, English is not my first language.

Feeling the ocean breeze mess up with your hair and leave little particles of salt on it, you sat over the bench and watched the sun appear over the horizon. It was incredibly calm, and beautiful, and you inhaled the aroma of the sea in front of you, an aroma your mother used to love when you were younger, always carrying you in her arms to take you there and watch the sunrise together while eating marmalade and butter sandwiches.

You stopped completely going there once she passed away, and everyone knew why you tried to avoid its existence as if it woke up all the melancholic memories you had with her.

The truth was, you always hated it, and you stopped completely going only because you had no reason to do it anymore. You could make your own decisions once she wasn’t around anymore, and your father never cared enough to keep you company even on important events, so for as long as you could, you just didn’t go.

However, now that you saw it in front of you, you did remember some moments with your mother, her smile, and her excited voice telling you to wake up and watch the sun appear.

‘’Fucking sea’’ you said once the sun completely stayed up there, an orange light showering the whole scenery making it even more breathtaking, but still hating it.

You stood up, grabbed the suitcase handle, and walked alongside the sea, trying to catch a cab in that part of the countryside little city, different from Seoul, which was always awake, you saw how only a couple of people were walking around there, and most of them where fishers getting ready for work, or maybe they were coming back, but you, a city girl your whole life, didn’t know.

You found a taxi not much later and telling him where you were going, the driver rolled his window even more, and giving you a good look, he nodded for you to jump in.

‘’It’s not far from here’’ he said, and you nodded, not feeling like talking much with him. ‘’When you leave, don’t let them charge you too much, never pay more than 15 dollars for any cab, and never go to the sea at night.’’

That last sentence caught your attention, sounding like advice but with a hint of uninterest, assuming that you were going to leave one day.

‘’When I leave?’’ you asked.

‘’You’re going to a rented apartment, I know that building, we know everyone here, and you’re a city girl, I can hear it in your voice, all pretty and clear, something happened to you there so you came here to hide, it’s always the same thing, but your kind never like it here enough to stay’’ he answered sure of his statement.

You looked out the window, the sea was blue, pure, immaculate, and the sun wasn’t orange anymore, a clear sky showing the clouds up there, which you could see reflected into the sea.

But it all looked so grey to you, after all, a beautiful thing like that one still killed people every now and then, fishers who tried to make a living, tourists curious of what was deep inside, or simply people who tried to refresh themselves with the cool temperature of it in the summer, so you nodded.

It was beautiful, a dream, but you would never fall in love with it, if you never did it before even with the memories of your childhood, why would you do it now?

‘’Thank you’’ you said, agreeing with him.

You’d never like it enough to stay.

Still, you kind of appreciated his words after living there for almost a month.

Something you never forgot was how that driver, only with that short conversation, helped you so much, because it was true, you never had to pay more than 15 bucks for any cab, and every time the drivers tried to take advantage of you because of your accent, you only had to spit a short fuck off before they called you a bitch and accepted your bills before driving away.

At first, it was hard, you had never cursed in front of another person and you felt almost sick whenever you did it, but after deciding no one knew you there enough to have the right to judge you, or reminding yourself to just say what went through your mind to not punish yourself later with an I should’ve done something different, you started to feel better with your life there.

Also, he had been right about city people hiding there.

There weren’t many, but they were there, and it was incredibly easy to recognize them.

Apart from the dialect, which was pretty much obvious, there was just something about them that screamed I’m not from here that you always noticed.

Perhaps it was the way most of you were programmed to be colder than most of the countryside people, always being respectful and polite, but always lacking that warmness they had, most of them treating each other like friends or family, while all of you were from the exterior, uninvited guests that one day would leave, and knowing your place, all of you said thank you, hello and goodbye without smiling or eye contact.

It wasn’t that bad for you thought, you had already told yourself to not be involved with people at all if it wasn’t necessary to avoid useless problems, but again, you were only a girl, and Gyeong-ah was just a girl too, and girls, as much as you tried to deny it, feel easily alone.

You met while buying groceries, and you knew immediately she was from Seoul because instead of choosing the detergent almost all the residents there bought, which had a powerful, almost heavy aroma of flowers to mask the sea smell, she chose the softer version without aroma that most girls that lived alone in Seol used to not mess with your perfumes.

You didn’t wear perfume, you never liked it, but you recognized the brand as if it was general knowledge taught at school.

‘’You’re from Seoul’’ you said before you could think it, and it wasn’t a question at all, it was a fact that she, when she heard it, couldn’t even deny because she recognized you too.

‘’You too’’ she said, and suddenly you had a friend.

Just as city girls, you two knew how to talk to each other, never crossing lines and being as cordial as you could, wanting to know but never digging too deep unless you were sure the other deserved to know delicate information about yourselves.

In a month you became best friends, and you started to like to live there, the grey color the area had wasn’t as grey anymore, taking a brighter variation now, almost becoming white, as white as her ceilings, or as the smile she sometimes showed you.

Both of you had really white teeth from performing as perfect city girls before arriving there, religiously visiting the dentist to get expensive treatments at least twice a year and using the famous toothpaste that girl group promoted on TV between music shows, with the phrase ‘’a pretty smile is a pretty heart’’ pushing half the population to buy it, effective, an incredibly overpriced.

Both of you stopped using it, but you respected how it still showed its results.

‘’The supermarket is opening a new position as a cashier, you could come if you want, you receive discounts as an employee’’ she said to the air when you were rambling about almost not having enough savings.

Even if it was the countryside and rent wasn’t even half of what you paid before, with everything you spent after unsuccessfully trying to fit the beauty standards when you lived there, your savings weren’t enough to live unemployed for too much time.

Next week you, instead of waking up to take a little walk before breakfast, now got ready to go to work and be a useful human being to society again.

And with that, both of you took a step further into your friendship, being able to reveal, after drinking a couple of beers, why you escaped from the city.

Gyeong-ah told you everything, from the pretty sequence of how she and her boyfriend met, to then what he did to hurt her, and how she suffered until she had to go through all those surgeries before she moved to Busan.

You told her everything too, how your boss pushed his hand under your skirt, how you reported it and how everyone looked at you as if you were crazy, ‘’She’s the one that reported the sexual assault case? She should be grateful anyone wanted to fuck her’’, and how, being completely alone, you were bullied until you had to quit.

‘’I was the first place in my class’’ she said.

‘’I closed the best deal the company ever had’’ you said.

Both of you cried until you fell slept together on her bed, and only woke up because both of you had to get ready for work.

It didn’t take long for you to get used to your new job, you were already a seller before arriving there, you knew how to talk to people and how to fake a good smile, charming customers into buying products they didn’t need and quickly gaining the manager approbation, because, after all, as everyone said, you were a good girl.

Sadly, Gyeong-ah didn’t have the same luck, and you understood her, she studied to do something different with her life, and you did it too, but she was younger and never had to learn how to make people love her before because she was incredibly gorgeous, but now that beauty wasn’t as useful anymore, and not knowing how to pretend as much as you, she couldn’t gain the appreciation you did, getting more scolds than praises.

It was on one occasion that her inexperience got her into a big argument with a client, and sadly you saw the first crack of your friendship appear.

That client was demanding a refund for a product without the receipt, and you wanted to run to her and repeat how you also couldn’t find the purchase on the system, but that woman was screaming so bad you got flashbacks of your boss’s wife screaming at you to take back the complaint, how her husband would never touch a disgusting pig like you (calling you that when she was as fat, to not say more, than you), and how you should just ruin your own life if you wanted to ruin someone’s.

She had the same voice tone, and even looked exactly like her, with dark red lipstick, a failed perm and all those cheap accessories, she was her spitting image.

You couldn’t move, watching the situation happen from afar, feet stuck to the floor and hands shaking, you repeated inside your mind to go and help her, to take her side, but you couldn’t, and making eye contact with one of the boys from the fish section when he walked in front of you, you closed your eyes to ignore the situation and not feel as pathetic as you did.

Later, when your break came, you went out to breathe as much air as you could, and trying to erase the memory of the past moment from your mind, you tried to think what could you do to apologize to Gyeong-ah.

Out there, between a couple of cars, in the middle of the immense parking lot, you tried to hide so no one saw you spiraling into a thousand thoughts, and there, almost breaking down, you stopped yourself from doing it when you saw the guy from before talking to that woman.

It looked as if she wanted to discuss with him too. He was beside her car, and she started to get closer to him while talking, you couldn’t hear it, but you saw her mouth moving as fast as before.

You were about to get closer to hear them, but you stopped once you saw a disgusting string of saliva being spit on the concrete by him.

It was so long and thick that you didn’t doubt it was a consequence of all those cigarettes he smoked every day.

You didn’t smoke, but Gyeong-ah did, and sometimes the smoke got impregnated in your clothes, so you could easily identify the Marlboro smell of the pack the two of them chose all the time, but he, unlike Gyeong-ah, had a smell a lot stronger.

Your thoughts were left aside once you saw the woman moving around nervous and he trying to take her phone. What the hell, you thought, and you were about to intervene when the woman jumped into her car and drove away.

Making eye contact with him again, he watched you for a couple of seconds before he turned around and completely ignored you, continuing to smoke his cigarette in peace.

‘’I don’t have time for this’’, you whispered to yourself and walked inside to talk with Gyeong-ah and not overthink anymore.

The first crack wasn’t deep, she said she understood it, and you hugged before finishing your shift and going back home to drink and badmouth that terrible woman, especially you, not thinking much of the woman from the supermarket, but of your boss’s wife.

She laughed while hearing all the insults you had about her appearance, going to sleep with a smile on her face and telling you that she would understand if the situation happened again because it wasn’t your fault, or hers, it was theirs for not understanding you two.

Little cracks continued to appear on the frame of your friendship, but it was still solid enough to survive everything.

At least, until Sangnim appeared, and completely smashed it to leave no trace of it.

That fucking bastard, as you used to call him, ruined everything with his existence.

The minute you saw him you knew something was off with him, you couldn’t help but notice small details when the two of them gave you a lift home, sensing the aroma of a perfume you used to smell a lot in Seoul inside his car, it was impossible Gyeong-ah was the only woman riding it, and you tried to slip a question without looking suspicious.

‘’Sangmin-ah, do you have sisters? I can’t believe how much you understand my Gyeong-ah’’ you said with a smile.

He made eye contact with you through the mirror and showed you a wide grin.

‘’I don’t have any sisters, but you’re so sweet, I really try to take care of Gyeong-ah as much as I can, she deserves it’’ he answered immediately.

‘’You’re right, she deserves it’’ you repeated, still smiling.

Shut the fuck off, you contained yourself from saying that out loud, nodding and looking around to find any other clue.

You couldn’t find anything, but he was definitely a cheater, and you, not having any solid proof, didn’t know how to break the news, so you pretended to not know anything to find the correct moment to say it.

Still, you left little comments every now and then, not blaming him, but leaving a trail of doubts around, doubts that sadly were never enough for Gyong-ah, fracturing too much your relationship.

You even thought that maybe you were exaggerating too, maybe deep inside you just tried to find a reason for her to end things with him, he was never going to stay, he said it before when you three had dinner, he’d go back to Seoul next year, and contrary to all predictions, thanks to your friendship, you liked it here enough to stay.

The future wasn’t bright at all, but it was enough for you, maybe in a couple of years you could escalate to a better position, you’d get benefits, you would walk around the beach every Sunday morning, and then you’d go and have breakfast with Gyeong-ah.

You had to apologize, for the sake of your friendship.

However, you didn’t have to, or more than that, you could never do it, because three days later Gyeong-ah passed away.

Waking up in your free day, you sent her a text to ask for an hour of her time to talk, but she didn’t answer in fifteen minutes, and you just knew something was wrong.

Taking a cab to her house, you saw the ashes all around, and how her room was the one who started it.

‘’It seems the oven was on’’ you heard one firefighter say.

Dropping to your knees, you denied it, because she always checked everything at least three times before going to sleep, it didn’t matter how drunk she was, she would check the door, the kitchen, and would unplug her phone charger from the wall.

‘’I saw on the news that chargers can get on fire’’ she said, and you laughed in her face because that only happened once every thousand times, ‘’Well, with my luck, I could be that one time.’’

‘’Shut up’’ you said while knocking three times on her wooden headboard.

It had to be him, it had to be him, it’s the only answer, she would never do it, she wouldn’t let her oven on in a million times, they didn’t know her like you did, and sadly, soon no one would remember her like you did.

Calling her mother was the hardest part, you couldn’t remember how the hug of a mother felt in real life, and when she wrapped you into her arms, you broke down with her, because even if you didn’t know her, Gyeong-ah had been telling her about you, always finishing the calls with the same sentence, ‘’Don’t worry mom, my friend’s is taking care of me here.’’

‘’I’m so sorry, I should’ve taken more care of her, I’m so sorry’’ you repeated in her arms, and her mother denied it, saying how that wasn’t your fault at all, but you felt as it was, because you could've stopped her from seeing him, you should’ve stopped her the minute you figured him out.

You didn’t, and it didn’t matter how many nights passed, you couldn’t sleep with the guilt consuming you.

Looking at the beach at night one day, not being able to sleep again, you remembered how the first day you arrived you were told to never go to the sea at night, and right there, you understood why that driver told you that.

For the first time ever, you thought that maybe, maybe, you should just get lost in it, like the fishers, like the tourists, like the innocents.

You weren’t none of them, none of them deserved it, but you were convinced you did.

And you were about to go meet her, until you realized that, there, on earth, you could continue taking care of her, because even if she wasn’t there with you anymore, you could do what was necessary to make Sangmin pay for what he did.

You wouldn’t survive another I should’ve, so you would do it, you would do what was necessary, and nothing would stop you.

Finding Sangmin’s information wasn’t hard, you just had to do a couple of clicks on the internet, and you had everything you could need.

If only you had done that before, but you refused to go back into social media, all your profiles were flooded with hate comments from people you used to work with, or your boss’s family, or people who didn’t know anything at all but felt the right to talk about your body, and she had also deleted all kind of social media for a similar reason, so none of you knew how he was about to get married, and how you had been right about the smell of her fiance's perfume and all the little comments you had left around.

It was simply impossible how they met was a coincidence, getting sex extorted just like Gyeong-ah? He knew how to get close to her and break down her walls, he planned everything, and finally, you had no doubt about doing something.

You planned to wait for him out of his job, you wanted to do it quick and easy, and no one would suspect you, you looked like a good girl, you were a good girl, you were one until he appeared and stole the little family you had, he stole your whole life, and you would do it too.

With a knife in hand, you waited for him to get out of work, and you thought that he would drive his car, but he didn’t, so you followed him down the dark street to an unknown place.

Gripping onto your weapon, you felt your heart punching your ribcage, nervous as never before.

I can do it, I can do it, you repeated inside your mind, trying to convince you again.

But you couldn’t, and entering an alley, letting him go, you started to cry while hugging your knees, apologizing to Gyeong-ah for not being able to do anything for her.

You felt a cold sensation touch your nape and you jumped away from it surprised, looking up at the sky night and watching the guy from work you never liked.

‘’Drink this’’ he pushed the water bottle to your face, almost obliging you to take it, and your heart started to beat again, knowing he had seen what you tried to do, knife on the floor easily to differentiate even in the dark.

‘’Gyeong… Su?’’ you tried to remember his name.

‘’Go home, sleep, and tomorrow go to work, the manager keeps calling you and leaving messages, your position is still yours’’ he said, almost immediately walking away, but you stopped him gripping his jeans.

‘’You saw me’’ you affirmed,

‘’I did’’ he didn’t try to lie.

‘’Don’t you think I’m bad? I tried to do something really bad.’’

Your voice almost broke, and your hand on his jeans was trembling.

He looked down at you, maintaining eye contact and scanning you, and you felt as if he was inside your mind, finding exactly what he wanted to know.

‘’You’re not bad’’, he said after a long silence.

‘’You don’t know me’’, you replied as soon as he finished talking.

He shrugged and pulling apart from your grip, he talked one last time before leaving, ‘’That’s true.’’

Completely alone there, you cried again until you felt satisfied, and looking up to the dark clear sky, you apologized one last time to Gyeong-ah, and to your mom, and to you, and after drinking the whole bottle of water, you walked to the beach, burring the knife into a hole in the sand you dug with your own hands, to then go home, take a shower, and sleep.

The next day you had to go to work, and you needed to sleep at least a couple of hours.

When you arrived at work the next day you told yourself to completely ignore Gyeong-su, not wanting to talk with someone who had seen you in such deplorable moments like the ones you had.

However, again, you were just a girl, and not having anyone around you anymore, he was the closest thing to intimacy you had.

The relationship you had wasn’t deep enough to be called a friendship, he rarely talked about himself, only keeping you company when he smoked a cigarette in his break and when his turn finished.

You can’t remember how you started to get closer to him, you just remember seeing him smoke near the plastic table behind the supermarket, near the entrance in which all trucks left the daily order of products, and sitting next to him in silence, missing the smell of the Marlboro Gyeong-ah used to smoke.

Somehow, it brought you a calm feeling, and your mind stopped thinking, becoming a blank sheet that didn’t need to be filled with anything, not memories of her, or your past life in Seoul, or Sangmin, only breathing and watching the ugly metallic green bars that surrounded the place as if it was a prison, separating it from the outside world.

He didn’t mind you staying there, and days after days, you started to notice his presence around more often inside the supermarket, and the little behaviors he had.

‘’A man of few words’’, you called him when he didn’t answer your question if he was from Seoul too, thing he never acknowledged, but it was too obvious.

He didn’t have the province dialect, he had a soft way of slurring words whenever the manager or his superior in the fish section made him questions, like most boys in the city did, especially those who worked as part-timers in convenience stores, a polite but tired tone, and you were sure he had received some kind of superior education because when you carried a copy of Justice written by Michael Sandel, he followed it with his eyes until you pushed it inside your bag.

‘’Those who insist that only bleeding wounds should count believe that post-traumatic stress reflects a weakness of character unworthy of honor. Those who believe that psychological wounds should qualify argue that veterans suffering long-term trauma and severe depression have sacrificed for their country as surely, and as honorably, as those who’ve lost a limb’’ you quoted the next day while he lighted his second cigarette and seemed more relaxed next to you.

‘’I’m too dumb for that’’ was the only thing he said before exhaling a long line of smoke.

You don’t know why, but after hearing him so sure while saying that, and after such a long time, you were able to laugh again.

Things were slightly getting better after two months, you could sleep at least four hours now, and you were doing things again, not only staring at your TV when you arrived home. You opened old books she had left at your house, cleaned your place more, and ate proper meals, and you still cried, but at least you were able to smile when you saw pictures of her in your phone.

Still, there were moments in which you crumbled, and one of them was when you heard what happened to Sangmin a long time ago, only a couple days after you tried to do… that.

You heard it from one of the clients, how weird things were happening, first the death of a former worker there in the supermarket, and then the death of her boyfriend, and how now there were other two girls dead.

‘’This never happened before those people started to move here’’ her companion, another elderly woman said, and of course they referred to the people like you, people that weren’t born or grew up there, but you couldn’t help but only think in what you had heard about Sangmin.

Sangmin was dead, and what should’ve brought you joy for fair karma, instead made you hide in the warehouse, crying and spiraling into your thoughts about Gyeong-ah, and how you didn’t even make an effort to make sure she got her real justice, cleaning her name from everyone’s mouths.

‘’What’s going on?’’ you heard Gyeong-su’s voice come from behind the shelf you were leaning to.

‘’He-He’s dead’’ you answered, you didn’t need much to think of how to phrase it, he knew who you were referring to.

‘’Isn’t that what you wanted?’’ he asked you.

You stayed silent, muffled cries hiding in your knees.

‘’I don’t know, but I’m hurting so much, and all I keep thinking about is how Gyeong-ah must have suffered more than me when she left this place, and how I’ll never be able to know if he received what he deserved, even more, how because of that I’ll never be able to clean her name, and now no one will remember her as clearly as I do’’ you then confessed.

Feeling like a sinner telling a priest all of her secrets, you felt as if something had left your chest free, your mind finally was out there, formed into words and tears, and you didn’t see his face, but that let you speak your mind even more free.

‘’I see’’ he murmured, ‘’and you’ve thought that all this time, I guess.’’

‘’Yes,’’ everything was out, your tears sliding down your cheeks and your body lighter, almost numb.

‘’Well, you shouldn’t compare your pain, or hers, or his, each of you went through things none of you three know, she doesn’t know how you’re mourning her death, you don’t know how she suffered the process of it, and none of you know how he suffered his, those are things none of you will ever know, so it’s okay if you hurt, but you don’t have to think much into what he deserved, because you’ll never have an answer, and you shouldn’t condition what you feel into an answer you’ll never receive.’’

You sniffed your tears, looking at the packages of toilet paper in front of you, wishing you could take one to clean your face.

‘’And I do remember her, not as clearly as you do, of course, no one will, she was your friend, but I remember she liked to buy fresh tuna every Friday to eat with you, she always had a blank face when the manager scolded her or when she talked to rude clients, and she would rarely smile, but with you, she would do it in front of others sometimes.’’

You exhaled.

That was exactly her, she liked tuna when you hated it, and you picked on her for having an old man's taste buds, you preferred chicken over it, but you let her win every time one of you had to choose, and yeah, she did stare blankly at others, including you, but if it was a good day, she would smiled at you with those white pearls she had inside her mouth.

Feeling as if some heavy weight was lifted from your shoulders, you exhaled and let your head fall to the shelf you were leaning into.

‘’You two were the city pair’’ he finished, making you laugh.

‘’You’re also a city boy’’ you said, and he coughed, ‘’and you’re a liar, you said you were dumb.’’

‘’I am, I never understood that book’’ he said before grabbing the box between you two, lifting it, and going out, leaving you there alone.

You felt as if finally, you had taken a step in the right direction, moving from your position, you cleaned your tears with the ugly blue vest, too hard for your cheeks, and waking you up with the pain.

A week later another girl died, and your boss had to organize a meeting.

‘’It seems the current situation is getting dangerous, especially for young girls, so the superiors have ordered all the women to leave while the sun is still up’’ he said, and you don’t know if it was because of an empathy people from where you grew up didn’t have, but you got surprised when none of the men argued with it, everyone nodding in unison.

You had permission to leave early, so you did it, not being able to share Gyeong-su’s company when your turn finished, only seeing each other in the first break.

‘’You’ll miss me’’ you said the first day, and he never made any sound to acknowledge your silly jokes, but this time he let a soft snicker, almost imperceptible, that made you smile too.

You tried to always do what you were told to, so you left before the sun went down, but that day you were in charge of counting merchandise in the warehouse, so you didn’t see how late it was until you checked your phone.

It was even later than the time for everyone to leave, so you quickly grabbed your things, said good night to your male coworkers, and left.

You tried to not get paranoid with the news, they specified that the killer only directed its attention to pretty girls, loving long legs and soft features.

Gyeong-ah and Sangmin cases were mentioned every now and then to repeat how dangerous things were getting, but they were never related to the girl’s deaths, being two different situations.

That’s why, you tried to convince yourself you would be okay, you didn’t share any of the characteristics the killer loved in their victims, and he supermarket wasn’t far from your house, but you didn’t dare to walk alone anymore between all the buildings, so you waited for a cab to appear and take you home.

You made sure to always be careful when you were alone, yes you took cabs, but you always had a pen on your hand and your phone ready to call 119 in the other, checking the routes and if the driver looked at you too much.

Everything was okay, you were already relaxed when you saw your building in front of you, so you shoved your things in your bag, pulled out the bill, and paid, walking home with an easy mind.

You never thought you would get snatched right next to your door.

With a hand on your mouth and the other on your tummy, you felt how you were dragged into the alley next to your building, darkness surrounding you while you felt a disgusting presence behind you.

The one who pulled you in was a man, taller than you, with big hands and an erection already ready to make your worst nightmare real.

You started to cry, muffled by his gloved hand, you couldn’t say anything when you heard his voice calling you sweet treat, ordering you to be silent if you didn’t want things to get ugly.

Begging Gyeong-ah, your mother, and God to send you help, you nodded when he said he would let you go if you were good.

‘’Promise?’’ he murmured.

‘’Promise’’ you agreed, closing your eyes and letting his hand cup your pussy with force, not making a single sound, only trembling with tears running down your cheeks.

He pushed your face to the wall and made you show him your bubbly ass, touching it as much as he wanted without an ounce of shame.

You thought this is it, my karma, repeating inside your head how this was your punishment for all the things you should and shouldn’t have done.

The man couldn’t even open the button of your jeans before you heard a loud bang and his body fell to the floor.

Staying in your position, you pressed your face to your hands and didn’t dare to turn around to see what was making all that noise, it was metallic, and it didn’t stop even when the man didn’t make a single noise anymore.

When things got silent, you, still trembling, turned your head to see what, or who stopped the man.

You never expected to see Gyeong-su covered in black clothes from head to toe, paint all over the floor, covering the man's body and face, and the can totally smashed and tossed to the side.

‘’Uh?’’ was the only thing that came out of your mouth.

‘’I knew he was going to come for you, this sick bastard’’ he said.

You didn’t understand why he thought that, and watching your white sneakers get ruined with the blood and the red paint, you started to cry even more, still in silence.

‘’It’s okay, you’re okay’’ he said, giving you your messed bag and, once again, leaving you alone.

You called the police, the number still there on your screen ready to only press the green button, and when you did it, you said your direction as clearly as you could.

‘’Did you see who did it?’’ one of the officers asked you, and you stayed silent for a good minute before answering.

‘’I didn’t’’ then you said.

The two cops keeping you company looked at each other and then the one writing things down nodded.

‘’I see’’ was the only thing he said before leaving you alone.

You didn’t have much to do, the man was dead, and now nothing could be done.

Was that justice? You thought.

They immediately recognized him as the killer, he had a patron, pretty girls who lived alone, and all the bodies showed the same signs of abuse before dying.

Perhaps he had lied to all of them, and he had lied to you, convincing you that if you did no sound you would live, but you’d have died just like them at the end.

But did he deserve to die? Just like Sangmin, wasn’t there another way to get justice for your pain? For yours, Gyeong-ah’s, and all those girls’.

Still, what you knew was that, even if it was contrary to all your values, knowing how valuable life was, Gyeong-su didn’t deserve any punishment, he had saved you, and justice for you, was that he continued free out there.

The next day before you went to work, you saw rests of the red paint still over the cement, thin layers already dry after so many hours, cracked with the breeze of the sea, and you thought how, if Gyeong-su hadn’t saved you yesterday, what anyone else would have seen in daylight was your cold body lying out there.

All your coworkers hugged you when you arrived, and your manager told you to take the day off if you needed, but you couldn’t go back home or you’d start to overthink things again, if what you did was the correct thing to do, if he deserved to die like that, if you were a killer too, taking into account how you saved Gyeong-su’s secret.

When the first break came you walked out to the plastic table, but Gyeong-su wasn’t there, and hugging your coat, you sat to wait for him, but he didn’t come.

He avoided you for days, and you thought the pseudo-friendship you had was over, until a detective arrived and started to make questions about what had happened to you that day.

‘’You really didn’t see who did it?’’ he asked, and you denied again, already used to say that lie as if it was an unchanging truth, ‘’Do you mind if I walk around here a little bit?’’

You didn’t have a reason to say no, but your eyes caught how Gyeong-su opened the curtain separating the counter from the freezer where all the fish waited to be cut and packed to be sold, and how he immediately took a step back, not letting himself be seen.

You don’t know why, but you knew Gyeong-su didn’t want that detective to see him.

‘’I’m sorry, but I really don’t want to see any more cops lurking around, he’s dead, and looking at you only brings me back the bad memories of that night’’ you didn’t know why you said something like that, it didn’t make any sense, all the older ladies loved to see the cops near, feeling a lot safer, but you didn’t know what else to say to make them leave.

His younger companion frowned and was about to say something before the detective stopped him and nodded, leaving you his card and telling you to call him in case you ever needed help or remembered something.

You didn’t answer, shoving it into one of the numerous pockets your vest had, and turned your back to continue writing down the stock you were counting.

‘’Ugly girls should learn how to talk prettily at least’’ you heard the younger say.

‘’Shut up, she’s a victim, she doesn’t have to entertain you with pretty words’’ the older quickly replied, ‘’and you don’t know what you’re saying, her face is very pretty.’’

Jand Nam-gam, you read in the card he left you.

He seemed like the kind of person who was only respected by the people who were near him, used to receive no as answers, and a bit blunt and unsophisticated, from the city, just like you, but without the calm and respectable vibe a detective from there usually had, and too honest and correct to survive there for long.

When you went out for your break a couple of hours later you saw Gyeong-su sitting on the table, smoking and waiting for you.

You sat next to him and for the first time, you showed him your palm, asking for a cigarette too.

Without looking at you, he gave you the one he was smoking, still new and ready for you to take it.

Your fingers brushed his when he gave it to you, and you tried to not think much about it, but you always thought too much, so to shut your mind up, you inhaled the cancer stick and held it as long as you could, slowly letting the grey cloud appear in front of your face.

The city had the same grey color it used to have before Gyeong-ah, and you weren’t sure how long you could stay there.

Your imagination wasn’t filled with a future there, you didn’t want to walk around the beach anymore, you had no one eating breakfast with you in your head, and you were afraid every time your turn finished and you had to go back home, running the few steps to open your building door, and only feeling safe once you checked that your oven was off and you put a chair behind your secured door.

‘’I didn’t ask for your help’’ he then said.

‘’Me neither’’ you answered.

He nodded, still looking at the metallic bars surrounding you.

‘’How did you know I didn’t want him to see me’’ he asked, breathing the air and pushing his hands inside his apron pockets.

‘’How did you know he was going to come for me’’ you asked back.

He shrugged like every time you asked him anything he couldn’t ignore.

‘’I just knew he would come for you, after all, they said he followed pretty girls.’’

It felt completely different from when the detective said it, and you bit the inside of your cheek, feeling a warm sensation reach your cold hands.

‘’I just knew it too’’ you said, tossing the rest of the stick to the floor.

It tasted like shit, and you couldn’t understand how he and Gyeong-ah smoked it every day.

‘’I won’t come to work tomorrow.’’

You felt incredibly alone again, you knew he meant that he wouldn’t come back, he would, again, leave you there on your own.

‘’Can you walk me home today? I’m afraid of going on my own.’’

He knew why you asked him that, a goodbye, a farewell, so he nodded and told you to wait for him at the front door.

Your turn finished and then you were waiting for him right where he had told you, a good girl following his words exactly like he wanted.

You stayed there, hands playing with the leather strap of your bag, the bag you used when you lived in Seoul, too noisy in the province, reason why you preferred to go around with your canvas tote bag, a lot more discreet and common, but that one had been ruined with the red paint that day, and just like your white sneakers, you had to toss it away.

When he appeared he nodded at you, indicating you with a tilt of his head to lead the way.

You two walked on silent, you couldn’t make any question or comment or silly joke, and it was obvious, by the grip on your bag, that you were nervous.

He noticed it, and pulling out his hand from the pocket of his bomber jacket, he grabbed your left hand and held it all the way to your house.

You felt incredibly calm, thinking how you shouldn’t because you knew, deep down, that he was dangerous. It was impossible, by the fear of facing the detective, that he hadn’t killed more people, and it was clear he was being followed.

That makes sense, you thought, if you weren’t sent to that province because of work, like Sangmin, you were hiding, and he was just like Gyeong-ah and you, escaping from things that had happened in the past, or perhaps, things that were still happening now.

But you hadn’t felt so safe in so long, because you knew that, with him, nothing would snatch you next to your house, and that no one would be able to enter your house, or that your oven was never going to magically explode.

With him by your side everything was okay, you were okay, and that was enough to make all those preoccupations disappear.

When you got to your entrance you let his hand go to open the principal door with your key, and he was behind you, observing you, you could feel his eyes on the back of your head, but when you turned to him, he let his eyes fall to the floor.

‘’Do you want to drink some coffee?’’ you asked, and he nodded, following you inside and walking up the stairs until you got to your little apartment.

It wasn’t amazing, but it was yours. You didn’t have an elevator, and you always had to go up to the fifth floor to let your clothes dry with a big basket, but it was okay, you liked your building, your neighbors were quiet, and you felt safe and sound there. Until that happened.

Inside your room you let him close the door for you, and you didn’t feel the need to immediately put the secure on, leaving your coat on the hanger instead, and taking off your shoes, you walked to your little kitchen, putting water in an electric kettle to boil it.

You could cook in your kitchen, but you never used the oven, and you preferred the electric kettle over the traditional one because once the water was done, it would automatically turn off.

Then you sat on the floor, leaving two cups, sugar and coffee over the little wooden table you had, and turning on the TV, you looked at him in the eyes until he sat beside you on the floor.

He was wearing an ugly grey sweater that kind of smelled like fish, mascaraed with what you identified as the cheap deodorant you sold in the store, but you were used to the fish smell he had, so you didn’t mind.

‘’Do you mind if I take a shower?’’ He said not much after.

You nodded, the news had just started, and you mindlessly changed the channel to try to find anything interesting.

‘’Sure, there are towels in the cabinet, I’ll get you some clothes, they’re mine, but I’m sure they’ll fit you’’ you said, and he didn’t waste a second to walk to your bathroom.

You gulped while changing the channels, you knew what you were going to do, but you hadn’t done it in so long, you needed a second to recognize what that sensation forming on your abdomen was.

You hadn’t done anything at all, and you felt yourself already getting wet inside your panties.

The click the jug did after the water was done caught your attention and you stood up to get the water, pulling out the cord from the plug, but knowing you had to get him his clothes, you walked to your little closet to find a t-shirt and some pants that could fit him.

He wasn’t buff at all, but he was lean, a normal guy there, not fat, not big, not small, and taller than normal, so you decided to find the biggest clothes you had.

You were choosing when you heard the door open and you felt him walking behind you, hands surrounding your waist and wetting your back with the drops that were still sliding down his chest.

‘’I chose this’’ you said, lifting the clothes so he could see them, feeling his breath touch the side of your neck and his nose brushing your skin.

‘’I’ll wear them later then’’ he answered, pushing you to your closed closet and making you turn to him.

You weren’t that short, but just then you noticed how much taller than you he was. He made you lift your eyes to him with a touch to your hands, taking the clothes from your hands and letting them fall to the floor.

‘’I- I don’t remember much how this was… it’s been years for me’’ you admitted, and he nodded.

‘’It’s been years for me too’’ he said, not as ashamed as you.

With the same hand that tossed the clothes, he made you look at him and accept his mouth over yours, taking the lead in the kiss and erasing all your thoughts.

It felt good, his lips were chapped, and he had the taste of smoke in his mouth, but you didn’t mind, it finally tasted good, and moving your hands to his neck, you let him press his body against yours, the lower half of his body only covered by one of your towels.

He wasn’t hard, but you could feel something poking at the front of your jeans, and you wanted him to lay on your bed, so after a couple of long minutes, and just after he had enough of your mouth, you murmured something.

‘’Let’s go to my bed’’ you begged with hazy eyes and weak legs, leaning onto him, who was holding you with his body against your closet doors.

He nodded, and taking your hand, he guided you there, making you sit and look up to him.

Your lights were on, and you felt nervous, you had never had sex with the lights on, you only had a couple of partners, and they always turned them off before fucking you.

‘’You can turn off the lights if you want’’ you said, looking at him in the eyes.

He didn’t answer, his hand went to your cheek, and he pressed the tips of his fingers over your skin, caressing it and then brushing your wet lips after all his kisses, slightly red and plump thanks to the way his lips covered them.

He didn’t acknowledge what you said, bending down to retake the contact between both mouths.

Full of life, unlike his usual demeanor, eager, he pushed you to your back, making you receive him between your legs.

Slightly harder, you felt the border of his boner only covered by the fabric damp your jeans, but he didn’t stop kissing you, one hand lying on your neck and the other helping him stay still over you to not let all his weight crush you.

You opened your legs as much as you could with the jeans stopping you from going too far.

‘’You know what I’ll do to you’’ he said after a minute.

You nodded.

‘’I won’t stop’’ he warned.

‘’I don’t want you to’’ you answered.

You knew no one was going to save you from that place, it wasn’t his job, so you’d accept this as enough, and you’d let him go without resentment and an I should’ve done it.

‘’Will you be okay?’’ he asked, afraid of hurting you more.

‘’I want this to happen’’ you said, making him look at you, caress your cheek once again, and give you another kiss before his hands went to your button and helped you take your jeans off.

Sliding the clothing off your legs, he pushed your thighs wide open, and feeling the texture of the towel, his now hard cock against your clothed clit made you whimper.

‘’It feels good’’ you said, to what he agreed with you.

‘’It feels good’’ he affirmed.

He did soft movements to stimulate you with his cock, only letting you feel what would soon be inside you.

Looking at your eyes flutter, he pushed up your shirt, showing him your black bra hugging your chest.

Touching the skin uncovered by your cups, he pressed his thumb to see how far it could sink into your skin.

Your chest was bigger than normal, just like your tummy, but he liked it, it looked comforting and soft, perfect for him to rest a little bit, after his exhausting life, it looked like a taste of paradise.

You pushed his hands while taking your shirt off without asking, to then unhook your bra and toss it to the floor.

‘’Touch me properly’’ you said, making him snicker.

You had forgotten how that little grin looked like, and you smiled when it appeared again.

‘’Okay,’’ he replied, unabashedly grabbing both tits and groping them, looking at how the skin flooded his grip between fingers, and feeling good with both sensations, his cock against your cunt, and his hands in your chest, you closed your eyes and moaned, moving your head to your side and cover your mouth with the back of your hand.

He didn’t let you hide yourself for long, making you open your mouth for him and pushing his tongue inside your mouth, obliging you to let the moans out.

Your panties were incredibly wet, and he left one of your tits free to sneak a hand inside them.

Juices gladly receiving him, he groaned when he felt you dripping all over his fingers.

Without asking, just like when you took your shirt, he introduced a finger.

You cried with his mouth over yours.

His finger was long, and it sent a delicious shock to your core, making you frown at how good it felt.

‘’More’’ you begged, and he gladly obliged, pushing one more finger to make scissoring motions and prepare you for him.

‘’Shit, it’s begging for it’’ he groaned when he heard how much your insides were squelching, asking for him to fill you up.

‘’Yes, yes’’ you cried, listening to his nasty approbations telling you how good you’d take him, and how much he couldn’t wait to fill that sweet pussy of yours.

Fucking you with his fingers, you moaned as much as you wanted, not caring to hide anymore, it was your only night with him, so you decided to not hold anything.

His mouth went to your nipple, tits falling to the sides of how heavy they were and shaking with his attention to your cunt.

He licked them, first with just the tip of his tongue, but then let it flat so it covered your buds and made you shake even more.

‘’Su- so good’’ you cried.

His fingers were making you dizzy, and you had to get up on your elbows to see his hand inside your panties moving to make you cum.

It was hard to see yourself like that, so naked, so exposed.

You couldn’t hide the way your tummy rolls were in front of his eyes, the marks on your skin, or the way your big tits didn’t look perfect on your body, but he seemed to not care, even liking it, guiding his mouth to your nipples again and looking into your eyes when he left soft pecks over them.

‘’You’re going to cum for me, right?’’ he murmured when you started to clench over him.

‘’I-I don’t know’’ you cried, never having an orgasm with your partners before, you didn’t know if that was an orgasm, or what the hell was it.

‘’You’re going to’’ he didn’t ask, ‘’and it’s because of my fingers, so good’’ he pushed his fingers faster and harder, stretching your panties with how brutal he was.

You couldn’t maintain your position and dropped over your back, crying with your walls pulsating around him.

‘’That’s it, so fucking good, my good girl’’ he said still moving his fingers.

You tried to push his hand away, eyes rolling to the back of your head and tears falling down your cheeks of overstimulation, and he stopped when you left a singular loud cry out, but only to take off your messed underwear and toss the towel wrapping his hips.

He let you take a second to breathe properly again, and pushing up your legs, he made you show him your glossy cunt, lips open and ready for him.

He couldn’t help it, it was all shiny and pretty, he had to taste it a little bit, and sinking to his knees over the floor, he pulled your body to the border of the bed, mouth going directly to your pussy.

Drinking your orgasm, the slurping sound was so nasty you had to put your hands over your face, cheeks burning with embarrassment.

‘’That’s too much’’ you tried to stop him, but he, mouth still stuck to your entrance, and nose poking at your clit, denied with his head, smearing your arousal over his face.

‘’You have no idea all the things I want to do to you’’ he replied, pushing his thumb to your opening, and pressing his tongue over your clit this time.

You cried, hands going to his wet hair and trying to pull him away, but he was stronger than you, and you never had a chance to stop him.

You couldn’t fight him, so you wanted to finish quickly instead, hips jolting to feel him more and grasp that sweet second orgasm you felt coming.

About to call his name, he separated and said something before going back to his work.

‘’Lee Tang’’ he said, and that was enough for you to know what he meant.

That was his name, not Gyeong-su, but Lee Tang, and you thought, that fits him a lot more.

‘’Lee… Tang’’ you said as you could, and then the only thing that came out of your mouth was a ton of Tang, Tang, repeating proudly his real name.

You were so close that you could feel your toes curling, walls ready to let your orgasm free and relax again, and your back was curving, your body needing to cum once again because of him.

But he was so cruel.

He stopped, and getting up his knees, he thumbed your clit, flicking the little button a couple of times before he slid his dick between your lips, making you feel his length resting over you.

‘’Please, I’m so close, please’’ you saw the light of your room above him, watching his dark eyes examine you, searching for another answer in your eyes.

You left a disappointed cry when he, instead of touching, walked away to grab his jacket hung next to yours, and sitting, you saw him pull a little box from his pocket.

So that’s why he made me wait for him outside, you thought, he didn’t want you to see what he was buying.

Opening the film package, you saw him sliding the condom over his member with experience, walking back at you and showing you how it looked, slightly jumping over the air, standing hard and thick, and pushing you to your back again, he pressed his tip on your entrance, making you clench over it, and nodded to your past pleading. ‘’You deserve it’’ he said before pushing his member inside.

He didn’t let you adjust, but you didn’t need it, you just wanted him to keep moving, and soon that soft pace wasn’t enough for you.

‘’Fuck’’ you couldn’t hold the curses in your throat.

It felt so good, the weight of his member inside, pushing the limits of your walls, taking what he wanted from you, it was so good your hands searched for something of him to grip, finding his hands over your hips to maintain you in your place for him.

‘’Tang, so good, please make me cum’’ you cried.

One of his hands interlocked with yours, helping you find comfort between all the intense sensations your insides were feeling.

You looked so good under him, your chubby torse facing him, showing him everything he wanted to see, and your thighs jiggling with each of his thrusts.

You were close, and so was he, but he needed something more, a little thing that had been wandering inside his mind since he started to see you differently.

‘’Can you turn for me?’’ he asked, needing to see your pretty ass taking him.

Not answering, you immediately crawled further in your bed, and searching for your pillow, you hugged it, pressing your face to your bedsheets and showing him your ass without any ounce of shame left.

‘’Fuck me’’ you begged again, opening your lips with your fingers and showing him your entrance gaping around nothing, ‘’Tang, please fuck me.’’

His breath stopped, he had never seen something that bold and hot before, and he admired your needy side calling for him to calm you.

Going to you, he pushed his entire length inside, bottoming out and pushing it inside in a single thrust to see your gorgeous back and thick thighs trembling with his cock.

You were crying and hugging your pillow, shoulders becoming smaller and one of your hands on your back searching for his to hold it again.

Lee Tang, not daring to ignore you, his good girl, like that, held your hand.

‘’You’re the one who wanted me to fuck you, and now you can’t take it?’’ he teased, not liking how much he was spoiling you.

‘’No, I can take it, please don’t stop’’ you implored, feeling his hard and fast thrusts pushing your sanity away.

He didn’t care how weak he was to you, feeling your walls wrapping around him like that was like nothing he had felt before, watching the curves of your waist interrupted with your little fat rolls, your ass bouncing against his pelvis with his strength, taking his cock like a gift, and your hand not letting him go even with how hard he was being with you, was everything he ever needed.

Hearing your sweet moans and cries all out when you came, with your sweet walls fluttering around him, pushed the last string inside him, and he pressed his cock inside you to let everything out in the condom.

‘’Tang-‘’ you gripped his hand harder.

‘’Yes baby, I’m cumming’’ he exhaled, letting all inside you.

‘’Okay’’ you said happy.

He wished he could stay connected to you forever, but he couldn’t, and he had to pull out of you to make sure the condom, and you, were alright.

Going to the bathroom to toss it in the trash, he looked at his reflection in the mirror, not recognizing himself with how relaxed he looked.

Tense all the time, he saw his eyes drowsy, ready to rest the whole night.

You, lying on your side to catch your breath, hoped that he could at least spend this night with you, his last night there, but maybe that was too much to ask.

When he came you didn’t look at him, and he simply accommodated behind you, spooning you with a hand over your tummy, letting his hand land there, and sighed.

‘’Let’s get inside the covers, the night is cold’’ he murmured, and you followed his request.

Under your bedsheets, a lot warmer thanks to the fabric and his skin, your mind started to drift away, so you looked at him one last time before falling asleep, closing your eyes when he left a last kiss over your lips.

When you woke up you were alone, feeling incredibly sore, and sad.

You stood up to drink a glass of water, not thinking much about how lonely you felt, concentrating on what would you do later that day to fill your head.

Would you be able to stay? You doubted it, you had too many memories here, and maybe the driver was right, all of you would leave one day.

You were about to go back to bed when you saw a little note next to your electric kettle.

I’ll come back in three weeks was written, and you closed your eyes, happy to not be abandoned again.

You had to stay so he could find you, that was your home now.

#lee tang #lee tang x reader #a killer paradox #choi wooshik #choi woo shik smut #lee tang smut #kpop smut #kdrama smut #i have no idea what tags to put #why can't i find more fics of this man #plus size reader #chubby reader #choi wooshik smut

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cheegu3 · 2 years

Text

tw / trigger warning: blood (in story & cover photo), violence, murder, alcohol/intoxication, kidnapping, dead bodies, swearing, mental breakdown, serial killer hyunjin, ⚠️

synopsis: While a ruthless serial killer haunts the small town of Huntsville, you as a detective get assigned the case. Unfortunately, you quickly catch his eyes and you’re now his next target, will you survive or are you different to his other victims?

genre: yandere, thriller, crime, serial killer

wc: 5.5k

a/n: I suddenly got inspired to write something spooky so here u go I hope u enjoy and that this makes ur weekend a littleee less shit <3 🖤

I have many longer fics coming up that have been in my drafts for too long :)

~ Hyunjin - the night stalker ~

A veil of paranoia laid upon the small town of Huntsville. Since the murder of the young girl in her 20s, more and more women had disappeared to then be found, dead and dumped somewhere in the outskirts of the town.

The police were freaking out behind the scenes, they had no leads no nothing - the killer, whoever it was, seemed too smart and too professional, already thinking ahead of them when they were committing the carefully calculated crime.

The real killer had quickly gained a reputation and he was well aware that he was called ‘’ the night stalker ‘’ due to his savage and repetitive ways of stalking his victims and then killing them in the dead of night. All of the attention he was getting was boosting his never ending ego. He dwelled in the surprised reactions of other killers who were too stupid to get caught, and the scared faces of women he saw talking in hushed voices, on how to protect themselves - it would make him chuckle to himself, like that would stop him?

*******

It was a regular day five years earlier, that had prompted you to make the sudden career change to become a detective.

You loved going on hikes, particularly alone where you could enjoy the sights and take it at your own pace.

The trail you had taken that day had ended up being tougher than anticipated. It took hours longer than you had planned it to and you found yourself at the end when it was pitch-black.

The best thing about the hiking trails? Easy - they often had bathrooms for people who had drunk a little too much water while walking, also good for washing off any dirt you may have gathered while out.

You always washed your hands before leaving, this time as well, even though your mind and body was just screaming at you to go home upon spotting your car a few hundred meters away.

The worst thing about hiking trails? Never, be there alone at night. You never know who you might meet, especially as a woman. A big animal, a kidnapping a murder, a rape - anything could happen there and the trails were so desolate that no one would be aware of it.

You had been to this one numerous times before, and usually no one but you and a few retired couples used it. So, the shock you felt when you left the bathrooms to finally go to your car, was indescribable.

Not many meters of walking were made before you bumped into a man, he was wearing all black and hard to see. You excused yourself and looked at him properly to make him know you were really sorry.

But something was off. His smile didn’t look confident as a starter, but that was only the smallest of the hints. The man was wearing a cap, covering most of his face and he had a shovel in one hand and a heavy, big backpack.

Shivers ran down your spine and you felt the hair all over your body rise up. Panic and shock was probably very visible on your face by now, even though you tried your best to not let your emotions impact the smile you were so desperately trying to keep up.

He seemed to have studied you too, not long after, the corners of his lips curled upwards.

‘‘ Are you okay? ‘‘ his voice was guttural, deep and now seemingly lilt with a newfound confidence.

It only made it worse, like he had sized you up and now felt you were no threat to him whatsoever. Your heartbeat had picked up immensely, drumming in your ears to the point where you barely heard him speak.

‘‘ Y-yeah, I’m, I’m fine ‘‘ your voice involuntarily revealed your distressed state.

‘‘ Just excited to go home ‘’ you added after taking a few moments to muster up the courage to speak without a voice that broke.

He nodded slowly, the smirk still on his face.

‘‘ Well, then. I must let the lady go home ‘‘ he bowed and turned, walking towards the direction of the forest’s opening.

You watched him for a few seconds - to really be sure he was gone before you could even start walking back to your car.

Your hands were shaking while unlocking it, and as soon as you sat down in the seat, you rammed the door shut and locked the car.

A few seconds of silence passed. You almost felt too stunned to drive straight away. But then the guilt and doubt started to hit, had you been way too quick to make such outrageous assumptions? He could have been doing a treasure hunt for his daughter, he could have just needed to dig up something for a friend, or flowers even.

But in the end, whatever reasoning you tried to counter your original thoughts with, didn’t seem logical enough, especially given the time of the day, the unpopular path and his attire. Although serial killers were very rare nowadays, you had seen enough true crime series to trust that gut-feeling when it hit you.

At the same time - he had acted so weirdly chill about you spotting him, even though he looked like a deer in headlights the first few seconds your eyes met, what suddenly made him get confident again and just...let you walk away?

You got the answer to your question mere seconds later when a loud bang on your car-window made you jump and scream in surprise. You felt like you already knew what it was but you didn’t dare look to your left.

Firm knocks hit the glass.

‘‘ Open up ‘‘

It was the same voice from before.

In a sheer moment of panic you pressed hard on the break and turned the car on. The car puttered for a few seconds before dying out completely. You felt hysterical, now, out of all possible situations - it decides to die on you now?

You tried again and let out a sarcastic, defeated laugh. His amused chuckle finally made you look to him.

‘‘ Not gonna work, darling. I already clipped the wires when I saw you come down the path ‘‘ the taunting smirk was back again.

‘‘ Now, roll down your windows at least. I only want to talk, there’s no need to be afraid, I promise hun ‘‘

You took a deep, shaky break and braced yourself. Pressing on the window button you immediately pushed at the same time with your feet, making you end up on the passenger seat, so as to make it more difficult for him to grab or hurt you.

He scoffed at your little move and then leaned in through the window so his face was inside the car. His hands were resting casually on either side.

‘‘ So, someone saw something they weren’t supposed to ‘‘

You stared at him, not daring to take your eyes off, and you attentively listened to every word he said.

‘‘ Usually, those people get killed, right? ‘‘ he licked his lips, baring his perfect teeth as he grinned and waited for you to answer.

You nodded rapidly.

‘‘ But since I’m so nice. I’ll let you off, on one condition ‘‘

You nodded obediently again.

‘‘ If you don’t tell anyone about what you saw, not the police or any friends, any family, any stranger. Got it? ‘‘

‘‘ Y-yes ‘‘

‘‘ If you do, not only your life will be in danger but also the ones you love ‘‘

‘‘ Don’t fuck up, I’m watching you, y/n ‘‘

*******

You had been assigned countless of murder cases in your first year so far as a detective. They were always especially sickening and personal any time it involved women and when you were assigned the case of the so called ‘’ night stalker ‘’ you naturally had objections.

No matter how much you tried to complain and get the case handed over to one of your male counterparts, the senior officer refused to let your wishes be granted.

You had no experience of a serial killer for a start, but as it finally started to settle in that they weren’t gonna give in - you promised yourself you’d solve this mystery for the sake of the women in the town, so that they didn’t have to live with fear every day of their lives.

How foolish you had been to not suspect the fact that the highly intelligent killer would notice your sudden interest in the case, and how foolish you had been for not thinking you could ever be a victim.

He knew way more about the local police station than they thought he did. He knew every little intimate detail about the people working there and he had little by little befriended them to outsmart them even further, now it was your turn.

‘‘ Y/n? can you come to my office for a second? ‘‘

You internally groaned at the familiar voice of your boss but knew you had to obey nonetheless. The door to his office stood slightly ajar and faint voices came from inside.

You knocked politely and stepped in fully when you heard your chief say ‘’ come in ‘’.

The dimly lit cramped room made you squint to see who was in your boss’s presence. It was a young handsome boy who looked more like he belonged in a magazine than a police station.

‘‘ Yes, boss? ‘‘ you smiled, only glancing at the boy next to him.

‘‘ This is Hyunjin, he’s an apprentice here and in your care ‘‘ your eyes darted back to the guy who gave you a shy smile.

‘‘ Nice to meet you ‘‘ he outstretched a hand that you took and you returned a smile.

‘‘ He’s your responsibility now and since you’ve had people to teach before, I trust you on this. He will assist on the serial killer case ‘‘

Your eyes widened.

‘’ W-what? but he’s only newly qualified ‘‘

‘‘ It was his wish. He’s especially interested in murder cases ‘‘

You nodded silently, it wasn’t like you’d be able to protest anyway, he was the boss and he had the final word.

‘‘ Let’s get to work then ‘‘ you said to Hyunjin and started making your way over to your office without looking to see if he was following, you’d rather he’d do tasks on his own and leave you alone for a bit.

Immediately upon your entrance to your office, you began looking for such tasks.

‘‘ Voilà! ‘‘ you snatched up a small folder from the bottom shelf.

‘‘ I found you something to work on ‘‘

He only raised an eyebrow at you. His sudden change in aura from the nervous guy in the boss’s office, to the confident and slightly intimidating man he was now, was striking and almost scary.

You shrugged it off and gave him an uncertain smile that faded with every second he kept the eye-contact. You couldn’t shake off the feeling that he knew something you didn’t.

‘‘ It’s just administrative work. But you can read through old reports we’ve done here, just to see how we do it ‘‘ you handed him the folder and he barely glanced at it before he looked up at you again, reinforcing the intense eye-contact.

‘‘ Um ’‘ you cleared your throat awkwardly. ‘‘ You can work in the room just outside so you won’t be disturbed ‘‘

‘‘ I’ll work fine in here...miss ‘‘ chills ran down your spine.

You chuckled uncomfortably. Guess there was no way out of this situation then.

You sat down at your desk and saw in the corner of your eye how he took a seat on the stale old sofa that stood in the corner. From there he had, to your dismay - a perfect view of you, and the thought of him sneaking glances or straight up staring as you were working made you squirm in your seat.

‘‘ Everything okay miss?

‘‘ Yes...thank you ‘‘ you smiled at him again but it didn’t reach your eyes.

‘‘ Please, call me y/n. We don’t need formalities since we’ll be working so close for a while ‘‘

‘‘ Yeah, we will ‘‘ he chuckled darkly.

You tried to ignore the weird newbie in the background as you sorted through the evidence again. There wasn’t much and that was the problem, the few things you had weren’t even enough to pin it down to one person.

For a few minutes you sat there anxiously bouncing your leg up and down before deciding to ask him of his opinion, a second opinion was always a good idea.

‘‘ Hyunjin? ‘‘

His eyes were strangely already on you when you went to look at him.

‘‘ Can you come here? I wanna hear what you think of this ‘‘

‘‘ Of course ‘‘ he got up and graciously strode over to your chair.

You twisted uncomfortably as you could feel his presence behind and it got even worse as he bent down, head almost right next to yours, if you turned you might’ve kissed him.

You chuckled awkwardly again but focused on the screen.

‘‘ Hmm ‘‘ he followed your eyes to the screen and seemed to be in deep thought over the contents on it.

‘‘ I think this is a very intelligent serial killer, calculated...’‘ he had that look on his face again, as if he knew something you didn’t ‘‘ perfect even, and you’ve missed it ‘‘ a smirk crept up on his face.

You raised an eyebrow at him, taking in his expressions while trying to read him and your gut feeling kicked in, telling you that something was off about him.

He cleared his throat and you saw how he straightened up again, the intense look in his eyes was gone.

‘‘ Should we maybe, go out for drinks to celebrate my first day? I think I have some ideas about this case that we can discuss ‘‘

‘‘ Good idea, new kid ‘‘

You whipped your head around, slightly startled at the new voice joining the conversation.

Your coworker was standing in the doorway, even though you swore you had closed the door. This time you rolled your eyes visibly.

‘‘ Get out ‘‘

He chuckled.

‘‘ Come on miss, are you gonna go home early again and be boring? ‘‘

‘‘ Mhmm, damn right. Sorry Hyunjin, maybe another time? ‘‘

Your coworker took the liberty of walking fully in now, going over to Hyunjin and grinning widely while slinging his arm around his shoulder like they were old best friends.

‘‘ Please! Just one time, then I won’t bother you again, we insist! ‘‘

You couldn’t help the laugh that slipped out upon seeing the new guy give you puppy eyes, immediately playing into your coworkers theatrics.

‘‘ Fine, fine. But only this time Seungmin and just a quick drink! ‘‘ your hands waved defeatedly.

‘‘ Yes! Let’s go ‘‘

You got your coats and were quickly on your way.

Your coworker had made you basically run to the nearest bar that was down the street because he said they would close soon.

When you arrived, the usually busy bar with a bustling atmosphere was empty except for some sad drunk in a corner. The lights were still on though so you followed the others inside.

A corner table was calling to you, it was in the very back of the restaurant and the darkest out of all the tables, so plenty of privacy. Hyunjin smiled slightly at your choice.

Right as you had sat down, Seungmin wanted to order drinks. You told him you wanted a glass of red wine, like you usually got and Hyunjin wanted a whole vodka bottle with shot glasses.

Soon as he had heard your wishes he disappeared around the corner to go order and you almost wanted to call out for him or to hurry after him. The last thing you wanted was to be alone with the creepy newcomer again.

It was quiet and awkward the first few minutes but you were thankful that he didn’t say anything to make it worse.

Your coworker’s head popped around the corner again. He grinned and waved a vodka bottle around, showing you he’d be there shortly.

When you glanced at Hyunjin, you saw him staring very intensely with hatred at Seungmin and you furrowed your eyebrows. Quite quickly he noticed your attention on him and only smiled at you.

‘‘ When he comes back, I’ll tell you about my ideas again ‘‘

You nodded although you were a bit uncomfortably and smiled politely. Not a second later, your coworker popped around the corner again, carrying the drinks on a tray that he was balancing impressively well.

You felt yourself relax and quickly got up to relieve him of some of the weight. As you all had settled down, an awkwardness that naturally appeared among strangers came again.

The only one who didn’t look uncomfortable was Hyunjin, you felt his eyes on you for the majority of the time but tried to ignore it.

‘‘ So, Hyunjin here wanted to discuss the case ‘‘ you said suddenly, trying to get the others to talk.

Seungmin’s eyes lit up in enthusiasm at the mention of the case. He found the whole thing very interesting, but as a man that liked solving puzzles, he was getting slightly irritated at his inability to so far solve this one.

‘‘ I’m curious to hear your thoughts ‘‘ his expression turned from eager to gloomy in a split second ‘‘ I’ve been really struggling with this one, the pressure from my seniors isn’t helping either and they’re not helping ‘‘

You gave him an empathetic but sad smile. You knew how much of a hard worker he was and the talent he had. Seungmin hadn’t hesitated for a second with helping you the first few months while you were getting settled in. For that, you were forever grateful and he had now become a sort of close friend, because he was all you had.

‘‘ No one has a clue? ‘‘ Hyunjin asked.

The intense stare was back in his eyes, only this time it wasn’t hatred apparent, it was more interest, maybe amusement like he was picking him apart bit by bit. His fingers twirled the vodka bottle slowly.

‘‘ No not really. This serial killer is something we’ve never dealt with before ‘‘

‘‘ We’ve had serial killers before, though very few ‘‘ you added to Hyunjin to make the picture become clearer.

‘‘ Hmm ‘‘ he tilted his head.

‘‘ Interesting ‘‘

‘‘ You had thoughts about it? ‘‘ the coworker said.

Hyunjin laughed stiffly.

‘‘ On second thought, it probably isn’t anything you haven’t already thought of ‘‘ he bit the corner of his lip as if suddenly feeling shy or nervous.

You tore your eyes away from him. He still felt so mysterious, you had not once so far been able to really figure out what he was thinking or feeling even though he displayed it so clearly on his face, something told you he was good at acting.

‘‘ I think...that we should take a sip now ‘‘ you said to break the weird tension that had been created after Hyunjin retracted his original saying of wanting to share his ideas.

Hyunjin had eyed Seungmin almost with a feeling of superiority and there was no doubt he had noticed the smugness on the newbie’s face.

‘‘ Good idea ‘‘ your coworker said and downed his beer in one go.

You shook your head at him and was just about to take a sip of your wine, slowly like you usually did, when Hyunjin pushed a shot glass of vodka into your line of view on the table. You looked up and he smirked, his glass already at his lips.

‘‘ Thank you ‘‘ you mimed and downed it.

Not much was said after that - you all continued to sip on your drinks, Hyunjin offering a shot or two occasionally, but as you started to feel the effects you politely declined thinking of how you would even get home.

‘‘ I...think, we should go home soon, work tomorrow ‘‘ you mumbled and felt your eyes getting heavier.

You heard deep laughs from your company but ignored it. They clearly had not been as affected by the alcohol since they were men. You however, were a lightweight and this was why you never wanted to go out after work, to avoid embarrassing yourself like this in front of your coworkers.

But fuck it, you had come this far now, there was no going back.

Before Hyunjin could react you snatched his filled shot glass from under him and downed it.

‘‘ Huh? ‘‘ he said, laughing in surprise.

‘‘ You shouldn’t drink more, y/n ‘‘

Hyunjin kept his eyes on you as you now plopped down your head on the table from the tiredness.

‘‘ She’ll be fine ‘‘

‘‘ I hope so. I’ll take her home just to be sure ‘‘ Seungmin said, genuinely feeling bad while looking at you being so out of it and guilty that he had forced you to go out with them.

‘‘ No you won’t ‘‘ Hyunjin said firmly, his eyes never leaving you.

‘‘ What? ‘‘

‘‘ I said you won’t. I will ‘‘

Your coworker was stunned.

‘‘ Kid, you joined today. I’ve known her for a long time, she’s my friend. ‘‘

Hyunjin scoffed and tore his eyes away from your slumped form to look him right in the eyes.

‘‘ You don’t trust me then? ‘‘ he didn’t look intimidating but he looked borderline insane with the way he was staring at your poor coworker, eyes bloodshot and wide like they were hiding some ugly deep desires behind.

The coworker shifted uncomfortably in his seat.

‘‘ I- I just think I should do it. I trust you, but we don’t know if she does ‘‘

A crazed grin crept up on his face and he began to laugh maniacally.

‘‘ No, don’t you get it, she likes me. Why would she not with the way she looked at me today? ‘‘

Hyunjin leaned in so only the coworker would be able to hear him.

‘‘ Besides, if you don’t do as I say, I will fucking kill you ‘‘

He gaped at him and looked very stunned, too scared to move in his seat in case the psycho in front of him would act.

‘‘ Very well ‘‘

A few seconds of silence passed between the two men. The tension was high but it had died down a bit once your coworker had answered.

Hyunjin stood up and was about to pick you up but Seungmin was quick, drawing out his gun and pressing the barrel into his back.

‘‘ If you move, I shoot. You’re not taking my friend ‘‘

There was no way he’d be a coward and let him go off with you, he was a detective after all and he’d put up a fight if he had to. Hyunjin looked over his shoulder.

He thought of ways he could get rid of the guy behind him. One hit would be all it would take. He smiled to himself before spinning around and grabbing your coworker’s hand with the gun.

As it was pointed to the ceiling it almost went off but Hyunjin punched him hard in the face before that could happen. He watched as Seungmin stumbled back, quickly on the verge of unconsciousness from the blow, as well as the hit his head took when he fell.

He cursed himself for not reacting quicker - only being able to watch you with pity while Hyunjin put you into his arms and carried you like a child.

The kidnapper in this case was tall, handsome like a model and wore expensive attire, which made anyone who saw him carrying a girl not be suspicious in the slightest - if he looked any different, it would be a different story, he knew that very well.

As he walked past restaurant staff and people on the street at them he smiled, thinking of how foolish they were to not look past the engraved beauty privilege he had inside and open their eyes, seeing that they were actually letting a crime occur.

He took you home to your apartment. A few of your neighbours were out smoking in front of the building and looked at you with jealousy and him with awe.

‘‘ That must be her boyfriend ‘‘ one of them said.

‘‘ How lucky she is ‘’ sighed another.

Hyunjin smiled at them and walked right past and up. He had already memorised your code from before so there wasn’t really a problem in his way and you lived alone, not even a pet in sight to his convenience.

He made sure to lock the door after and put you down gently on your bed.

You surely wouldn’t wake up in a long time but he wasn’t a very patient man, he tried tapping you lightly on your cheek which made you groan.

‘‘ Wake up ‘‘

Slowly you opened your eyes. The silhouette of a blurry man slowly coming into focus was the first thing you saw. Immediately you created some distance and continued to do so even when your view was no longer blurry and you saw that it was your new colleague that was standing in front of you now.

Perhaps if it was any other colleague than the one you trusted the least, you might not have done that but then again you were a detective and was taught to trust no one.

The corners of his mouth quirked slightly upwards when he saw that you had woken up, seemingly not bothered by how quickly you moved away from him like he was a virus.

‘‘ What are you doing here? ‘‘

He smiled fully now but it didn’t quite reach his eyes which only made it look quite psychotic.

‘‘ I took you home ‘‘ he shrugged and pulled back to his full height again.

Several thoughts of paranoia and mistrust struck you at once. What did he do after that, why did he stay in your house after getting you home, better yet...

‘‘ How did you know my code? ‘‘

As soon as the thought came up you blurted it out. The distance was greater now and the atmosphere was slightly tense as he chuckled awkwardly, raising one eyebrow.

‘‘ What? ‘‘

‘‘ I said, how the fuck did you get into my apartment? ‘‘

He seemed to be a bit caught off guard by your sudden realisation but then a few seconds later he responded, so naturally as if it was read off of a script.

‘‘ Your neighbour knew your code, she let me in ‘‘ He smiled and raised the coffee-cup to his lips, drinking in the way you looked like you were freaking out on the inside - completely falling apart in front of him.

Oh, how poor little you must feel right now - even doubting your own instincts. He smirked behind the cup at the thought of this.

After about a minute of silence - which was basically you avoiding eye-contact and obsessively trying to calm your naturally suspicious thoughts from attacking your colleague again, you gave him an apologetic smile.

‘‘ Sorry, I didn’t mean to come off as rude or...’‘

‘‘ Paranoid? ‘‘ he smirked openly now.

Something stirred in your gut again but you only laughed.

‘‘ Yeah..paranoid ‘‘

‘‘ Um, I suppose we should get to work then ‘‘ you added, slightly awkward after the silence.

‘‘ No ‘‘

‘‘ Uh, what? What do you mean no? ‘‘

He threw his head back and laughed loudly, unable to contain his amusement.

‘‘ This is too much fun ‘‘

Your furrowed your brows.

‘‘ You don’t know just how long I’ve been waiting for this ‘‘

‘‘ How coincidental, that the girl I met five years ago is now the cop that’s chasing me ‘‘ he came closer but your barely registered it as you tried to understand what he was saying.

A gasp left you. It felt like all the puzzle pieces had fallen into place.

‘‘ I told you to behave, did I not, darling? ‘‘

The nickname had a bigger effect on you than you would’ve liked it to. It unburied that deep fear you had felt that day; that horrible day where you had witnessed something so inhumane and awful, but you weren’t allowed to tell a soul. His nickname had echoed as well as his voice, over and over again for months until you figured out how to turn it off.

You twisted your head, almost in agony and put your hands over your ears to try to drown out the constant repeat of his voice that night,

darling, darling, darling

don’t fuck up, i’m watching you, y/n

Your screamed, the voice wouldn’t go away. Tears started to stream down your face, completely out of your control - and you had curled yourself up on the sofa with your legs up to your chest.

Among the screams, voices and thumping of your heart, you still heard his echoing footsteps as he got closer and closer to where you sat.

‘‘ No, no. Please, please don’t hurt me! ‘‘ you started to become erratic, your life and family, everyone you loved, flashing behind your eyes.

You thought this was it.

‘‘ I-I promise, I’ve been good! I haven’t told anyone ‘‘ you cried.

He tilted his head while looking down at your messy self. It was hard to stop himself from smiling with utter feelings of amusement again and superiority. He could make you crumble, so easily...

There was a place, perfectly fit for you. It had been arranged for months; originally meant to be a torture chamber where you would spend your last moments alive, but things changed.

Hyunjin’s eyes were rarely full of warmth, but they were now. He had taken on the job to be closer to you and eventually kill you. You’d be his last kill, full circle since his first kill had been what you witnessed five years ago. He had watched you all these years like he had told you he would.

And he saw everything - from your texts, calls, search histories and photos. He would find it exciting when you sent nudes to potential hookups or partners, you were giving him all this enjoyment as well as blackmail material for free after all.

After about four years into his stalking, he caught feelings. It was like nothing the cold killer had experienced before, so naturally he had to explore it further. He wanted to see fear in your eyes as you looked directly at him, drinking in his features - that was normal with his victims. What differed with you though, was the fact that he also wanted to be gentle. He wanted to take care of you and kiss you, maybe even start a family with you one day...and it was weird, why did he feel that way?

Hyunjin had to get closer to you; figure out what was so special about you to make him bewitched so. It took a long year for him to be able to fake an impressive resumé and get specifically stationed beside you through his connections.

Perhaps he would’ve stayed by your side, quietly if you hadn’t gotten so much closer to catching the killer than your colleagues. It had gotten to a point where he could no longer just stand and watch as you found your way to him, he had to find you first.

Therefor Hyunjin felt like he was on top of the world now. He had managed to pull that off after all.

Approaching you, he quickly slung you over his shoulder, without much protest. Your body had frozen up in shock and fear, so you were basically limp, only occasional sobs leaving your lips.

He put you down in the backseat of his car, laying down. The Gods were on his side today it seemed, because there were no nosy ladies outside your apartment building questioning him again, it was dead silent with not a person in sight.

‘‘ Please, don’t kill me...’’ you kept repeating to yourself in the backseat, rocking slightly to calm your nerves.

There was a sense of adoration as he looked at you now through the mirror. He absolutely had to keep you. After this, you would never be able to go to work or outside without him being by your side, monitoring your body language, every word and action.

You were perfect for him. He was always able to have control over you, because you were terrified of him and fear is the greatest weapon.

Don’t they say - opposites belong together, after all?

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