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#kj apa fluff
supercap2319 · 8 months
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How about an Archie x M! Reader where they are parents? Preferably to a son who is a toddler and he says his first word like calling Archie ‘dada’ and his and M! Readers hearts just melt. Basically really cute family fluff!
Archie came into the house to find Y/N sitting on the couch as he watched Fred play innocently with his blocks on the living room carpet. He smiled and chuckled lightly as he made his presence known.
"And how are my two favorite guys doing?"
Y/N turned to him and smiled. "Hey, you."
"Hey, yourself." He leaned down and kissed Y/N's lips.
They were that sickly sweet young married couple who were childhood sweethearts in school. Now, they had a baby boy named after Archie's late father, and things couldn't be better. Except maybe sex, if Fred didn't insist on sleeping between them every night.
Archie pulled back and grinned. "The Archies are a success."
"What? Arch, that's fantastic." He had been trying to get his band's name out there for a while now, and it was finally happening. Y/N hugged his husband. "When do you guys play?"
"A week from today. It's going to be big."
They were so caught up in the excitement, that they didn't see Fred walking towards Archie and tugging on his pants. "Dada?" Archie looks at him in shock and so does Y/N, before Archie speaks. "Did he just say what I think he just said?"
Y/N nods. "Yes, and I didn't even get my camera to capture this moment. Say it again, champ. Say 'dada' for your dads."
Fred coos and gurgles. "Dada?"
Archie grinned and lifted Fred into the air as Y/N took a picture with his phone. "Atta boy!"
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denim-devil · 1 year
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Archie was a minor in season 1 of Riverdale so could u do a adult Archie like he was in the time skip in future seasons thanks
I haven’t watched the new seasons because it went so downhill, idk if I can write for him?!
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6rookie-writer0110 · 6 months
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If I'm not bothering you could I request a big cock dom top KJ Apa chubby fem bottom male reader where they are getting married and reader is a actor too from the chilling adventures of Sabrina him and KJ invite the whole cast to their wedding then they go on their honeymoon once they're alone KJ Dom Daddy side comes reader changes into lingeries and heels with face f****** cum eating facial and breeding KJ's obsessed with the readers body worship the reader's body sucks on his tits while reader holds KJ's head and moans and kj starts to f*** the readers tits and tell him he's a good boy Daddy's good little boy then comes all over the reader's face and Rita starts to worship his body by licking and sucking on all his muscles KJ Face fucks him till he comes in the reader's mouth and kj starts to f*** the reader on the bed hard with the bed moving back and forth then flips the Reader over on his back and tell him to be a good boy take all of Daddy's come then he breeds and then Kj screams fuck by coming inside the reader then licks the cum off the reader's body with fluff at the end where they just cuddle and KJ tell him how much he loves him
Wow ok 😳
I will write it
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felteverywhere · 2 years
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to celebrate me actually feeling like i may make it through my drafts here’s a little mini wishlist which doubles as a starter/plotting call. under the cut are some characters i’m itching to use, fcs i want to use/play against and some plots i’m dying for. if you like this i’ll come to you to discuss!
characters
caroline (sarah catherine hook fc)
nico (mason gooding fc)
odette (lili reinhart fc)
mack (cooper van grootel fc)
jackie (diana silvers fc)
julian (kj apa fc)
mirren (renee rapp fc)
owen (mike faist)
stevie (erana james fc)
tanner (elias kacavas)
faceclaims
mallory bechtel
bailee madison
maia reficco
zaria simone
malia pyles
jordan gonzalez
lizeth selene
jon bernthal
victoria pedretti
gavin leatherwood
zoey deutch
nico hiraga
drew starkey
plots
something inspired by the song before by niki. a couple that’s gone long distance or reuniting after ‘breaking up’ for college and the tension/angst of seeing each other again but it’s not the same. just... pain. 
terrible toxic dark stuff but we just have a jolly little time exploring it. inspo. 
angsty exes bc wow apparently i really wanna be sad. inspo. 
slasher movie, scream inspired, the fear that one of your friends could be the killer. 
homoerotic weird sh*t. inspo. 
murder. intrigue. spies! always questioning who is being manipulated. inspo. 
two rich popular assholes. the playboy falling first for the bitchy mean girl but she’s dating his best friend oh god it’s so cute. inspo. 
friends or enemies to lovers but with a mega painful slow burn thanks
10 things i hate about you plot i’ve got a gun and i’m not afraid to take hostages to get this one
i also like basic cute stuff sorry like if you just wanna write fluff i’ll also do that 
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mattersofentropy · 2 years
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Welcome to my little corner of this hellsite! Mun is 25+ and muses are all 21+. This blog is not mutual exclusive, however it is semi-selective with moderately low activity. Writing will primarily be contained to tumblr. Discord is available on a very limited basis. And only after we have been writing for some time. Content on this blog will range from fluff to angst to smut. Sometimes triggering content will also be present. Below are links for easy mobile navigation. Below the cut are a list of my muses to make life easy.
Rules
Muses
Wanted plots
Wanted opposites
Males:
Jacob Grayson - Casey Deidrick
Zane Sanders - Skeet Ulrich
Charles Montgomery - Jeffrey Dean Morgan
Bryce Prince - Jordan Elsass
Isaac Cassidy - Zac Efron
Evan Keller - Charlie Cox
Lorenzo Bianchi - Michele Morrone
Gareth Cole - Jacob Elordi
Nathan Bayles - Joe Manganiello
Declan Hennessey - Joseph Quinn
Matias Flores - Pedro Pascal
Mason Richards - KJ Apa
Females:
Victoria Torres - Selena Gomez
Gabriella Rivas - Ana de Armas
Katherine Sheppard - Adelaide Kane
Olivia Davenport - Josephine Langford
Danielle Pritchard - Hailee Steinfeld
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c0ldjury · 1 year
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when      you’re     sitting    on    an    empire  ,   it’s    nice    to    be    able    to    see   when   someone’s    loyalty     starts       wavering      [  . . .  ]    or   if    anyone    is    getting      too      fond      of        anyone      else       . .        can     you      see       the      potential     ?       he      didn’t      get       where     he      is       with     some       fluff     skill         . . .    
ᴬᶜᵀ ¹, ˢᶜᴱᴺᴱ ¹   :       this    is    private    &    selective     marcus  of  the  volturi ,  who   will   be   treated   as   an   original   character    with    a   mixed   portrayal   from   twilight   lore  ,   sothern   gothic   themes  ,   and   a  mix   from   vampire   diaries   and   anne   rice   vampire   chronicles.     loved    by    willow      she/her    28+     3.16.2023             pinned   post.           
                                         affiliated    with    :     ᵃᵍᵉᵈʳᵒᵗ    ( 𝔞𝔯𝔬 )
carrd  coming    |     anti   smeyer     |     minors   +    personals   dni    |    adult   themes    involved.          rules   below:
  RULE ONE    i go by willow and i am 28 years old. my activity on this blog will be based on comfort and this blog will be selective on who i follow. i work part-time and go to school, plus i have other blogs you might also be following!  
RULE TWO     general rules apply , meaning don't be rude / an asshole and start drama. i will not participate in any drama that would ruin my or anyone elses experience while writing because this should be a fun and safe place. however, i do understand that there are subjects we shouldn't be using like it's a theme in threads. if you write incest , pedohilia , homophobia or racist . . . hardblock and will unfollow.  
RULE THREE   while   i   will   follow   some  lore  ,   consider  it   canon  divergent.   i   do  not   agree   with   smeyer   or   anything   she’s   written   about   her  characters.   marcus   will   be   an   original   character   of    my   own   design.    i  want  to   point   out   that   while   my   characters   fc   is   afro-caribbean  ,   i   am   asian   and   will   do  my   best   not  to   offend   anyone   and   open   to   constructive   criticism   than   attacks  !
  RULE FOUR     i am a lover when it comes to shipping but just like anyone else, i wouldn't like to force or be forced a ship and please respect my wishes when i say no.  marcus   main  ship  is  didyme  but  i’m  open  to  plotting  a  ship  or  maybe  changing  his  “ twilight “ lore.  however,  didyme  and  marcus  will  be  the  set  ship  unless   said  otherwise.  shipping  with  marcus  with  the  death  of  didyme  ,  he’s  more  than  likely  not  to  be  in  love  and  rather  a  relationship   of  skinship  and  nothing  below  surface  level.
RULE FIVE    i don't have any triggers but i'll be safe in labeling any possible triggers for anyone. i will also add more rules as i establish this blog but for now , these are my rules 
RULE  SIX      i won't be doing starter calls ! meme's are how i'll start a thread and we can continue from there and i don't care if you send a bunch at once. it might take me sometime to answer them but i'll get to them. please don't rush me into replying because i work and do school. ( i am very much open to writing on discord as well because it gives me a chance to write with little formatting )
RULE SEVEN  please do not steal anything that i've edited from graphics to headcanons. i will also add credits to psds here ( supersources ). i will also list a few fcs that i won't be interacting with for example: kj apa , lea michele, holland roden, adelaide kane, and more to be added when i come across them . . .
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jcinktinder · 2 years
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Chris Hemsworth/Tom Hiddleston/Anthony Mackie (or open) wanted for high school misfit friend group. Three different spots 'open' and available to join this fun rag tag band of grown adults who have never really grown up and are still up to the same shenanigans that they were back in high school! Several members of the group already on the site for interaction! 
Siblings wanted for Ana de Armas, several different options trailer trash maternal side and rich high class paternal side (this would be a found family plot). All sibling roles can be male or female and faces are open!
Lily James (or open) wanted as (finals) wife for Ben Barnes in a perfect family dynamic fluff plot. Neither of them get along with his biological brother however are extremely close to his adopted family. Lots of connections already on the site! 
KJ Apa (or open) wanted a current boyfriend for Zendaya. Super open history and plot. Non-final but completely open ended as they are both young. Face is open but Tom Holland and Timothee Chamalet are not preferred. 
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therpdirectory · 2 years
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Chris Hemsworth/Tom Hiddleston/Anthony Mackie (or open) wanted for high school misfit friend group. Three different spots 'open' and available to join this fun rag tag band of grown adults who have never really grown up and are still up to the same shenanigans that they were back in high school! Several members of the group already on the site for interaction! 
Siblings wanted for Ana de Armas, several different options trailer trash maternal side and rich high class paternal side (this would be a found family plot). All sibling roles can be male or female and faces are open!
Lily James (or open) wanted as (finals) wife for Ben Barnes in a perfect family dynamic fluff plot. Neither of them get along with his biological brother however are extremely close to his adopted family. Lots of connections already on the site! 
KJ Apa (or open) wanted a current boyfriend for Zendaya. Super open history and plot. Non-final but completely open ended as they are both young. Face is open but Tom Holland and Timothee Chamalet are not preferred. 
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allthingsroleplay · 2 years
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Chris Hemsworth/Tom Hiddleston/Anthony Mackie (or open) wanted for high school misfit friend group. Three different spots 'open' and available to join this fun rag tag band of grown adults who have never really grown up and are still up to the same shenanigans that they were back in high school! Several members of the group already on the site for interaction! 
Siblings wanted for Ana de Armas, several different options trailer trash maternal side and rich high class paternal side (this would be a found family plot). All sibling roles can be male or female and faces are open!
Lily James (or open) wanted as (finals) wife for Ben Barnes in a perfect family dynamic fluff plot. Neither of them get along with his biological brother however are extremely close to his adopted family. Lots of connections already on the site! 
KJ Apa (or open) wanted a current boyfriend for Zendaya. Super open history and plot. Non-final but completely open ended as they are both young. Face is open but Tom Holland and Timothee Chamalet are not preferred. 
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dailyjcink · 2 years
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Chris Hemsworth/Tom Hiddleston/Anthony Mackie (or open) wanted for high school misfit friend group. Three different spots 'open' and available to join this fun rag tag band of grown adults who have never really grown up and are still up to the same shenanigans that they were back in high school! Several members of the group already on the site for interaction! 
Siblings wanted for Ana de Armas, several different options trailer trash maternal side and rich high class paternal side (this would be a found family plot). All sibling roles can be male or female and faces are open!
Lily James (or open) wanted as (finals) wife for Ben Barnes in a perfect family dynamic fluff plot. Neither of them get along with his biological brother however are extremely close to his adopted family. Lots of connections already on the site! 
KJ Apa (or open) wanted a current boyfriend for Zendaya. Super open history and plot. Non-final but completely open ended as they are both young. Face is open but Tom Holland and Timothee Chamalet are not preferred. 
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rpings · 2 years
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Chris Hemsworth/Tom Hiddleston/Anthony Mackie (or open) wanted for high school misfit friend group. Three different spots 'open' and available to join this fun rag tag band of grown adults who have never really grown up and are still up to the same shenanigans that they were back in high school! Several members of the group already on the site for interaction! 
Siblings wanted for Ana de Armas, several different options trailer trash maternal side and rich high class paternal side (this would be a found family plot). All sibling roles can be male or female and faces are open!
Lily James (or open) wanted as (finals) wife for Ben Barnes in a perfect family dynamic fluff plot. Neither of them get along with his biological brother however are extremely close to his adopted family. Lots of connections already on the site! 
KJ Apa (or open) wanted a current boyfriend for Zendaya. Super open history and plot. Non-final but completely open ended as they are both young. Face is open but Tom Holland and Timothee Chamalet are not preferred. 
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rpgadverts · 2 years
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Chris Hemsworth/Tom Hiddleston/Anthony Mackie (or open) wanted for high school misfit friend group. Three different spots 'open' and available to join this fun rag tag band of grown adults who have never really grown up and are still up to the same shenanigans that they were back in high school! Several members of the group already on the site for interaction! 
Siblings wanted for Ana de Armas, several different options trailer trash maternal side and rich high class paternal side (this would be a found family plot). All sibling roles can be male or female and faces are open!
Lily James (or open) wanted as (finals) wife for Ben Barnes in a perfect family dynamic fluff plot. Neither of them get along with his biological brother however are extremely close to his adopted family. Lots of connections already on the site! 
KJ Apa (or open) wanted a current boyfriend for Zendaya. Super open history and plot. Non-final but completely open ended as they are both young. Face is open but Tom Holland and Timothee Chamalet are not preferred. 
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denim-devil · 1 year
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Do you write for KJ APA or Riverdale Archie Andrews
I have only watched S1 so I could, but i’d have to base it around S1…
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cashmeremars · 3 years
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𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐚𝐫𝐤 || 𝐚.𝐚
𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: archie andrews x fem!reader
𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: reader gets attacked at Fred’s construction site and is severely hurt
𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: angst, violence (you literally get jumped so..), fluff, set in season 1
𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 2.3k+
𝐚/𝐧: the way this was requested in 2017 oof 
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***
The crackling of the fireplace was subtle as the mellow flames dimly lit the room. The stars outside were almost completely visible through the slightly frosted windows of the warm building. Soft music played in the background as the sound of gentle chattering fluttered throughout the room. Off in their own corner of the room was a young couple exchanging whispers and gazes to one another. Anybody could tell they were in love with one another as their hearts melted like chocolate under the sun.
“Hey, thanks for helping out today. It really helped in moving things along. I think my dad likes you more than me now.” Archie laughed softly as he held your hand in his. Archie looked across the small brown table as he stared lovingly into your eyes. Two cups of warm coffee sat between the two as Archie wrapped your fingers around his.
“Thank you, Archie. You know I’d do anything to help you and your family out.” you smiled, steam blowing lightly away from your face as you spoke. You smiled up at Archie when he started to rub your fingers with his.
“I’m just glad it took a lot less time than it usually does. Things have gotten so stressful this year and it’s nice to have another pair of hands helping, especially if it means I get to spend more time with you” Archie spoke with a small smile. You felt your heart flutter lightly at the words. 
“Easy win-win for you then. It’s getting pretty late isn’t it?” You asked as you turned to look at the old clock hanging on the wall
“Yeah. Do you wanna get a ride or something? I can drive you back to my house or you can stay at my place tonight?” Archie spoke
“Archie, I live like 3 seconds away from you, and I have my own car” 
“Sorry, I guess I was being a bit of a clingy boyfriend” Archie nodded his head downwards with an awkward chuckle and what seemed to be a light blush.
“Don’t apologize. It’s cute that you care so much for me” you smiled as you got up and grabbed your things. As you were about to walk away, you felt a slight tug on your arm that forced you to avert your attention towards the boy
“Hey, be safe okay? I’ll see you tomorrow” Archie spoke softly. You turned towards him and gave him a quick peck and two gentle pats on his cheek before turning back towards the door as you gave your goodbyes to everyone else.
***
You shivered as a cold air lingered up your spine, rattling your bones one by one as you took your first step out of the cabin. You wrapped your jacket around yourself tightly as you looked around standing on the porch of the cabin. It was dark, which was expected as it was nearly midnight. The cold air had left signatures of your own breath fluttering around your head. Leaves scattered the ground as autumn was among them, along with something much darker. 
You sighed once more as you made your way down the creaky cabin steps on the way to your car. Just as you were making your way to the parking lot, a twig snapped in the distance. You whipped your head towards the noise, squinting as you looked into the gathering of trees behind the cabin before turning around. You figured it was just another construction worker in the background. You continued to make your way to your car before stopping. It was almost as though an ominous silhouette had been shifting behind you on the path. You shuffled your feet slightly to turn once more before an abrupt rush of pain made its way to your forehead. It was as if 100 baseball bats had been battered against your head. You sharply cried as you fell to the ground. Blood started to rush down your forehead as you clutched your head in pain. Through the gloss of your eyes, you were able to make out multiple feet gathered around your body. A swift kick to your stomach stopped you from yelling for help. Then there was another kick, and then another, until it felt like the kicks would never stop. Your blood mixed with dirt as you could do nothing but cry.
“Help! Someone help me please!” You managed to croak.
“You’re on your own, darling” One of the attackers said before spitting on you and cackling along with the others. 
Fists connected with bones as feet were rammed into flesh. You couldn’t move, and you certainly couldn’t fight back. One final kick to your face had sent you into the depths of unconsciousness, you could faintly hear the cabin door slam open before the voice of your boyfriend was heard. 
It was funny how fast circumstances could change. One second you were surrounded by an atmosphere that screamed love, and safety. A place filled with comfort, a place that was warm, a place that was kind. But it was all just a blanket of security. A blanket that was ripped out from over your body, exposing you to the trouble that lurked just around the corner. Now you were on the ground in a puddle of your own blood. Nothing to protect you, forced to face the harsh realities of life on your own. The harowest of realities. You were in the dark. 
***
Streams of harsh light filtered through your eyelids as you began to regain consciousness. The blood rushing rapidly to your head and the abrasive thumping of your brain had caused you to wince and shut your eyes once more. You let a quiet groan as you felt your eyes welling from the pain once again. The aching and pain prickling at your body had hit you all at once. Every bruise, scratch, and cut could be felt simultaneously, almost knocking the breath out of you. You flinched slightly as your tears slid down over the bruises on your face. 
“Darling?” a soft voice spoke in the corner with a sniffle
“Archie?” you whispered as you attempted to turn your head towards the source of the voice
“Oh my god, you’re awake” Archie sighed as he frantically moved to your bedside, quickly placing your hand in his
“How did I get here?” You ask with a squint. The white lighting in the hospital room was not easing your pounding headache.
“Some guys almost beat you to death when you were walking to your car, when we finally got to you, you were passed out so we drove here as fast as we could”
“Right” you spoke, your eyes welling up with tears as you remembered the utter fear that submerged your body
“It’s my fault” Archie spoke quietly before turning his head away from you
“What are you talking about?” you ask, trying your best to get him to face you once again
“If I hadn’t let you stay with me that late at night, you would’ve been home. Safe. From whoever the hell was trying to hurt you” Archie explained as a tear fell silently from his face and onto the white blanket draped on your body
“Archie-” You whispered
“No. It is my fault. I should’ve walked you to your car, or taken you home myself. But all I did was tell you to be safe, and let you go. Then the exact opposite happened” From the corner of your eye you could see Archie’s fist turning pale as he tightly gripped the side of your hospital bed.
“Archie. Please don’t blame yourself. It really wasn’t your fault. I’m also not in the condition to comfort you anyways” You said as you weakly reached your hand out to him
“Right, sorry” he said before quickly wiping a tear and dragging his chair closer to your bed
“It’s fine” you said as your eyes began to flutter closed again
“Gosh, I just hope we find those assholes that did this to you so they can rot in prison” archie said as he roughly dragged his fingers through his hair
“It just happened so fast, Archie” you said after a beat of silence. The slight waver in your voice caused Archie to glance up at you immediately
“What?” He asked as he leaned in closer to you
“One second I was just walking out of the cabin, and then I got punched in the face. Then beat to the ground. I felt helpless, Arch. I couldn’t do anything, I could barely even yell for help. I’ve never felt so weak and useless in my life, Archie. At that moment, I felt like I was going to die, and I couldn’t do anything about it. I just had to hope that it would be over soon, or that someone would come and rescue me. I hate that I couldn’t defend myself, and I had to wait for someone to find me. What if it happens again, and I’m completely alone? I wouldn’t be able to do anything. Do you know how quickly they could just kill me, Archie? I wouldn’t have a choice but to accept it. I can’t do anything for myself. I’m hopeless.”
“Hey, hey, hey, don’t say that. It’s okay, you’re not weak. Quite frankly, there isn’t much people can do when they’re literally being jumped by several strangers. Don’t feel bad because you couldn’t defend yourself, and please don’t feel bad that you “needed saving”. You’re not going to die, alright? The only thing that matters is that you’re alive, and I will do anything to make sure this doesn’t happen again, to you or anyone.” Archie said before planting a soft kiss on the back of your hand. At this point you were nearly sobbing as you couldn’t stop the tears from falling. You finally got to take a good look at Archie and saw that his eyes were a vicious red, indicating that he had been crying the past few hours. Archie gazed at you softly as tears of his own began to slip down his cheeks.
“Thank you, Archie. I love you” You whispered, continuing to gaze into his eyes.
“I love you too” Archie uttered back as he softly caressed the back of your hand, just as he had earlier today.
The door opened slightly before a concerned head peeked through.
“Is everything okay in here, Archie?” Fred asked before diverting his attention to you,“Oh, you’re awake?” He said before lightly slipping into the hospital room.
“Yeah, I was just asking how she was” Archie explained, looking back at his father quickly before returning his attention to you
“Do you mind if I have a minute with her, Archie?” Fred asked timidly as he shoved his hands into his pockets 
“Yeah, sure” Archie replied hesitantly before getting up to leave.
Fred watched as Archie left the room, only turning his attention to you once the door had shut.
“How are you feeling?” He asked, taking a seat that Archie had just occupied
“Fine” You muttered before pursing your lips together and staring up at the ceiling
“Really?” He asked, raising an eyebrow in concern
“It hurts. A lot. That’s all I can really say about it.” You spoke once more
“Listen, darling, we’re gonna do everything in our power to find whoever did this to you, and make sure that they face the consequences they deserve. There will be no mercy for whoever harmed my future daughter in law” Fred said sternly, contrasting the worried look that engulfed his features.
There was a long pause of silence as you processed what he had just said to you.
“Daughter in law?” You asked meekly, finally turning to face him.
“Oh, right. Too soon?” He asked with a slight chuckle
“Not at all. It has a nice ring to it” You said with a fond smile
“Good. I’ll make sure you stay alive long enough to make it official” He said in an attempt to lighten the mood. You laughed softly before you spoke once again, “Thank you, Mr.Andrews”
“Anything for my future daughter in law” He replied with a wink before heading out of the hospital room.
***
Archie entered the room almost immediately and headed straight towards you. 
“What did he say to you?” He asked as he noticed the warm smile adorning your bruised face
“Oh, uh, nothing” You said, trying and failing to hide your bliss.
“Really? He walked out of here with a weird smile on his face. Seemed a bit smug.” He explained with a brow raised in suspicion.
“It was nothing too important, Archie. At least not yet.” You said before turning your head to the ceiling once again and shutting your eyes.
For as long as you were in the dark, Archie would be the light that would guide you.
***
a/n: sorry if this was weird but i don’t even watch riverdale anymore lmaooo. i might have been a bit detached writing this lol.
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coveredinsweetpea · 5 years
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I Can't Fall In Love Without You || K.J. Apa
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A/n: This was requested by @namelesslosers . Thank you!! I fucked it up a bit, but i hope you’ll still like it!
Summary: Y/n is a famous singer/actress who used to date KJ. When one night, at a ceremony they’re both attending, she performs a song that’s ‘not-so-subtly’ about him, things take a turn.
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“Y/n, hurry! why aren’t you dressed?” or “Sign your name here, here and here” or “You have to go to this event, everyone will there” Words could never describe just how sick you were of having to put up with this specific façade. This on going rush you’ve been living in, this ever lasting maze of horror filled fake smiles, exhausted in you in a way you never thought possible. The life inside you was now grey colored, and a dark aura surrounded you. At this point, you had the exact same job, hung out with the exact same people, lived in the same house and slept in the same bed as you did when you still had him. Walking inside your apartment and not hearing any “Babe, I made food, the top is a little burnt but I’ll eat that part, I swear the bottom tastes really good. Gordon Ramsey taught me” felt utterly useless, and it didn’t take long before it turned into dread. The Grammy’s were tonight, and you sighed heavily as you got out of the limousine, realizing this was yet another red carpet you’d walk without KJ by your side. You’ve done it for years before meeting him, you knew what to do and how to act, the whole thing was that you didn’t want to do it by yourself. You missed his arm around your waist, and those stupid dad jokes he’s whisper in your ear just to get you to flash that genuine smile of yours for the camera. Despite being media trained and knowing exactly what to do, how to keep your legs and shoulders, where to look and so on in order to look good in pictures, KJ knew just how much better you looked when your true feeling were showing. All things considered, you were sure no one noticed just how much different you looked without him, but frankly, you were glad they had no idea. The last thing you needed were more questions about him, considering it had been months since you two parted ways.
“God!” Mary exclaimed, rushing to you, “How many times do I have to say this! Don’t sit down!” “Yeah yeah yeah” you mumbled, standing up from the armchair. Your eyes were still trained on the screen of your phone, following carefully a thread showing all the outfits people wore to the event. You knew Joe was invited, but since he wasn’t a nominee or an important guest, you weren’t surprised you didn’t see pictures of him yet. “Looking for him again?” your best friend sighed, “You’re performing in 2 minutes, get your vibes on!” “I’d fucking have my vibes on-” you snapped, talking as you walked away from her, “If you’d just let me be!” “What’s gotten your panties in a bunch, huh?” she taunted, walking towards you, “Haven’t seen you this moody in a while” “Meg, you know I love you” you sighed, turning around just enough to be able to look her in the eye, “But now is not the time” “It’s KJ, isn’t it?” “No, it’s not” you lied with a roll of your eyes, “I’m just nervous, that’s all” To be fair, it wasn’t a complete lie. You really were more nervous than you’ve been in ages, but that was because this was the biggest stage you’d walk on without as much as a smile of encouragement from him. KJ was somewhere in the audience, and the fact that your source of confidence would just watch your performance from beginning to end without having any direct influence over it, made you knees weak. Eventually, there was no where for you to hide anymore as the time to step on stage finally came. You did so on shaky knees, but as soon as your ears were met with chants of excitement and rounds of applause, you remembered why you chose this path in life. After a few seconds the lights dimmed, and silence settled. The song you had to perform wasn’t the most vocally challenging, but the emotional baggage it brought upon you was enough to make your lungs shake with every word you sang.
“I can be out every night No one else holding me down I can do just what I like But I can’t fall in love without you I can’t fall in love without you
Please don’t fall in love without me I hope you’re sorry Can’t find the words to say Hope you’re always worried Worryin’ ‘bout me”
Your palms were sweaty against the microphone and your ears were ever so numb, that you could barely hear yourself. The emotion for this song came from somewhere deep within, and you knew your secret was out - if you could even call it a secret. But at that moment, you didn’t care about them, all you saw before your eyes were the endless nights you spent without KJ. It didn’t matter if you were alone or not, it was his company you wanted, not anyone else’s. After your performance, Shawn Mendes took the stage and ended the whole ceremony, as you watched quietly from backstage. When everything was over, you hurried to change out of your long light blue dress, and into a black one, which despite being less revealing, was shorter and tighter. Ditching your pair of high heel sandals in favor of a pair of silver stilettos, you jumped into your car, where your stylist did her magic, and turned your flawless curls into a sea of messy waves. While you were still more than a few blocks away from where the after  party was to be held, your phone started blowing up. Twitter had gone mad, 3 different hashtags involving you and KJ were trending, your Instagram follower count had gone up by 80.000 bringing you close to the 70M milestone. All kinds of magazines and websites, most of which you haven’t even heard of before were posting about you, updating, speculating and analyzing. As it turns out, performing a song that was obviously about your ex after you’ve just received the first Grammy of your career, was indeed a big deal. The way from your car and to the door of the venue was quitter than you expected, but it was still early and the paparazzi hadn’t yet found the location. You calmly walked inside, the party already in full swing. A lot of celebrities that had no business attending the ceremony but were considered important enough by the mainstream media, were invited to this party. Most of your friends were there, so it didn’t take long for you to mingle in. You tried keeping yourself busy jumping from group to group, meeting new people and seeing old friends, but your mind wasn’t having it. KJ was still haunting your thoughts, so you made your way to the bar, hoping a drink would help you get in the mood to party. As you pondered what to order, you felt a very familiar cologne invade your senses. It made your knees weak, and your heart was beating at a pace that was by no means safe as you feared that at any moment, it would physically burst out of your chest. “Two strawberry vodka” you heard him saw, and it took everything inside of you not at aww at his words, as that had been your drink, starting from your very first date, up to the last time you drank together. “Wow” you smiled, turning to him, “Classy” “You taught me” KJ laughed, already blushing. It might have been the light, but the red in his hair was darker and his dark brown roots were beginning to show - that was something you always loved about him. He was wearing a plain white t shirt tucked into black jeans, and had his hair not been red, he would have made a perfect James Dean. “What’s up?” you asked softly, facing him completely despite still leaning against the bar. “I just wanted to congratulate you” he said, waving his arm. He would have touched you, squeezed your elbow or patted your shoulder, but you sensed the fear in his gestures, and it truly pained you. “Thank you” you smiled, “This is really big, didn’t think I’d win” “I knew you would” he grinned. “Did you?” “Yeah!” KJ nodded, before his smile faded, “I actually wanted to text you last night and wish you good luck and all that, but I figured it was a bad idea” “It wasn’t” you pouted, “I would have appreciated it. But now is almost just as good” He looked at you, his eyes lingering on yours as a new kind of smile curled the corners of his lips upwards. “I know just the thing-” he mumbled, grabbing his phone out of his right pocket. He kept it so you couldn’t see what he was doing, but soon after your drinks arrived, he placed his phone back in his pocket, and an exact second later, your own buzzed. “Oh god” you giggled, rolling your eyes. It was obviously a text from him, but you didn’t hesitate to read it. “Hey, Y/N, I know we haven’t talked in ages and I hate that a lot. I am also aware I missed a lot of important things in your life, but I did follow as much as I could through the internet so my prediction is based on facts. I’ll keep this short because I know you don’t like sappy moments, but that Grammy is yours. There’s no doubt about it. One day, you’ll win an Oscar too, I know it. Good luck, angel! x” “See?” you whined, stomping your foot against the floor, “Why are you like this?” “Like what?” he asked curious, leaning his head to the side. “Like-” you stuttered, furrowing your brows, “Like you!” “Like me?” KJ laughed, advancing towards you a bit, but still keeping a decent distance between your bodies, “Why am I like me? what do you mean?” You rolled your eyes with a scoff, “You know what I mean!” “Why do I still worry about you even after all this time?” he teased, coming another step closer. Despite knowing where this was going you didn’t have it in you to stop it, “Don’t make references to my song!” “It’s a good song” he defended himself. “Of course it is” you scoffed, closing the distance between your bodies. “Why? Because you wrote it?” KJ mocked, wrapping his left arm around your middle. You looked up into his eyes and saw him smiling down at you. It warmed your heart as you haven’t seen that exact reaction in months, and to be honest, it was you absolute favorite thing in the word. He looked at you in complete awe and you were done. “No…” you whispered, “Because it’s about you” He tucked a strand of hair behind your ear, “I still love you, you know? Nothing changed for me, and it won’t anytime soon” Your teasing mood and flirty attitude disappeared in an instant, now you were sad, angry - at yourself, and had no idea what to do. “I shouldn’t have performed that song, this isn’t ok” Despite saying these things, you didn’t back away from him. Instead, you wrapped your arms around him and hid your face in his neck. KJ brought you closer to his chest, holding you tight around your middle. It was a hug at the edge between a reunion and a goodbye, and you were dead set on not letting go of him until you knew which one of the two it actually was. “Hey-” KJ said, gently pushing you away so he could look into your eyes as he spoke, “We can talk about this, whatever it is. Let’s go outside and-” “No” you shook your head, “I can’t do this tonight” “I-” he tried to speak, obviously taken aback, but you stopped him. “I waited for this night ever since I was 8. I dreamed about holding that award in my hands for so long, I don’t want anything to ruin this for me” It was visible just how much your words pained him, but he held it all back. Or at least he tried. Tears glistered at the corners of his eyes, but he still nodded in agreement, taking a step back, “I respect that” You grabbed his hand to stop him, as you didn’t want to let anything unfinished, “I do love you, and I mean it from the bottom of my heart. Take me back-” you said, “for tonight. Can everything go back to normal, just for this night, and we’ll talk about it in the morning, and we’ll work through things as they come, I thought I-” KJ cut you off, as he grabbed your cheeks, and kissed you. He was more passionate than you ever felt him. You’ve done this so many times, yet this felling right now, it was knew. You teeth still clanked against his, and you still licked the corner of his mouth by mistake, but your eyes remained closed, just as his, because this was new. This was the beginning of something new. It was like your very first kiss all over again. With one arm around you and a hand planted on the side of your rib cage, he held you as close as he could, every now and then sighing against your lips, sighs which eventually turned into little moans, until you had to pull away. “Scare me like that ever again-” “What?” you laughed, “Did you think we were gonna break up again, or?” “Are you ever not this sassy?” KJ exclaimed. “Would I still be the woman you fell in love with if I didn’t mock you?” He laughed out loud, “Probably not, so please don’t ever stop”
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riverdalefan6602 · 4 years
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