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chicken-fifi · 7 months

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Captive | Vincenzo Cassano (Vincenzo)

Pairing: Vincenzo Cassano / Park Joohyung x Fem!Reader

Requested by anon: Hi Fifi! I saw you write for Vincenzo, and I was wondering if you would consider writing something angsty centered around the reader and Vincenzo dating and she gets kidnapped by Babel's ppl and he has to rescue her? I hope this is an ok request. Thank you! Your hard work on this blog is always appreciated. ♡

Genre: angst

Warnings: swears, spoilers for episode 16 and beginning of 17, blood, death, murder, psychopath, guns, this whole show is a warning man, mafia, mob, MURDER, i also changed a few small things to accommodate the reader in this imagine

Word Count: 3,173 words

A/n: my first vincenzo request! i loved this kdrama so much man and really hope i was able to do it justice below the cut. and i really just wanna hug you for your kind words there anon. you just made my night (i'm writing this late as hell). as always, feedback is always appreciated! i may have also gone a bit overboard with the length of this one without noticing. it's always the kdrama imagines these days...

“How’s she doing?” Vincenzo asked over the phone. As much as he was trying to hide his concern for his biological mother, his tone gave away his increasing worry about her.

“She’s fine at the moment,” you said looking at the woman sitting in her wheelchair getting some fresh air. “She seems much more cheery since we took those pictures the other day.”

You turned away just barely missing the way the photograph you were talking about fell from her hands and another person - a man - approached and picked it up before striking up a small conversation with her. “She knows it’s you, you know. Why don’t you just tell her that you haven’t stopped looking over her from afar? Call her ‘Mom?’ It’d mean the world to her, you know,” you turned back hearing her laugh and noticed the man sitting on the bench next to her chatting away. Vincenzo said something that you didn’t quite catch. “Sorry, what was that?”

“I asked if you could stay with her tonight,” he repeated, voice trailing off. You could practically envision his brows furrowing. “Is everything alright?”

“Yeah…just distracted. I’ll call you back later,” you hurried not waiting for a response before marching over to Gyeongja and the unknown man. “Can I help you with something?”

The man turned to look at you, eyes widening slightly before they went back to their normal size as he rose to his feet, a smile forming on his face. “Jang Hanseok,” he said, extending his hand to you before retracting it when you didn’t take it. “The photograph fell and I simply picked it up and could help but notice how handsome her son was. You must be happy to have such a handsome boyfriend.”

“Oh she is,” Gyeongja giggled softly. “They make a good couple.”

His attention shifted from you back to her briefly before turning back to you, a strange look in his eye. It was then that you fully took him in. His skin was slightly tanned, crows feet appearing at the corners of his eyes whenever he smiled, hair perfectly styled to compliment his casual outfit, a monotone look consisting of a blazer, t-shirt, and slacks, finished with a pair of canvas sneakers, all in off-white. There was an uneasy air about him that made you nervous just being in his presence. Shivers went down your spine as the hair on the back of your neck stood up. You didn’t have a spidey sense but if you did, it would most definitely be going off like crazy right now.

The look in Hanseok’s eyes changed drastically as you continued staring at him, almost as if sensing your discomfort. You stepped closer to Gyeongja gripping the handles of the wheelchair tightly, your knuckles turning white. He smiled again, raising his brows momentarily before clearly his throat.

“Well, ladies, I have a very important appointment to get to so I’ll see you both around. I hope you get better soon,” he turned to you and stared for a moment before leaving, not looking back.

You watched him carefully before hearing a sigh and looking at the older woman as her fingers grazed over the photograph as she gazed in the direction he'd walked in.

“The poor thing. He doesn’t have a single picture with his parents. And his father never cared for him…”

Under most circumstances you would feel some form of sympathy for any one person after a comment like that, but for some reason it only sets alarms off in your head.

“It’s getting a bit cold, we should go back inside so you don’t get sick,” you said, beginning to push the wheelchair.

Your phone buzzed as you entered the hospital. Once inside an elevator you pulled it out seeing a message from Vincenzo.

I’m going to tell her tonight. I’m not missing this chance. I’ll be there later.

You smiled, sending a quick reply before shoving your phone back in your pocket as the elevator stopped and the doors opened and you headed to her room, getting her situated back in the bed and chatted with her for a while before she drifted off, you following soon after.

~~~

Mumbling from outside the door woke you from your light slumber. Carefully rising from your place in the chair you went to the door jumping back as it was opened and a man dressed in scrub entered, the guard posted outside the room being tossed inside like he weighed nothing, blood pooling on the floor underneath his head. You turned to rush to the bed to press the call button, an arm wrapping around your neck preventing you from doing so. The grip tightened as you scratched and pulled at the man’s arms, mouth opening and closing as you tried to make a sound, only for nothing to come out.

“Just pass out you bitch,” he uttered as he tightened his hold on your. You began getting light headed and fought even hard against his grip to try and break free to no avail. You began going limp in his arms as a sharp stinging sensation spread in your neck. He’d injected you with a sedative that only quickened the effects of the lack of oxygen. You finally passed out.

Quietly, he sat you next to the door, slumped against the wall and made his way over the bed, pulling on a pair of latex gloves as he stared at the old, sick, defenseless woman. She turned around slowly as she awoke, the photograph clutched to her chest.

“What’s going on?” she asked as she looked behind him seeing the bloodied floor and the seemingly dead man. Her eyes shifted to your body slumped over, not moving either but no blood.

The man rushed at her wrapping his gloved hands around her neck beginning to choke her. Her own shot up attempting to push them away with the little strength she could muster as the beeping of the heart monitor sped up. The machine flatlined as she lost consciousness after a number of minutes, arms falling away from him. Letting go, he stepped back, walking over to your body and picking you up, taking you out of the room and laying you down on the gurney he’d been using to get around without suspicion. Placing you on it, he covered you with a sheet - not noticing the shoe that had fallen off in the room. Closing the door, he began pushing the gurney away from the room nurses only giving him a spare glace.

Taking an elevator to the first floor, he pushed it out walking right past Vincenzo who didn’t spare him a second glance as he got in the elevator, a brown paper bag in hand, ready to call Gyeongja ‘Mom’ for the first time in a long, long time. To see your face as you smiled at him when he did so. Ready to be on the receiving end of a strong embrace from the two of you - the two people who truly made him feel like he had a chance at being a normal civilian.

Unbeknownst to him at that moment, none of those things would happen. Instead he’d be met with his good friend Death once more, ruining all of those plans. Police rushed past him as he neared his mother’s room. A crowd was formed outside looking in. His eyes drifted to the linoleum floor seeing the blood splatters outside. His heart rate sped up as he kept walking, pushing away a doctor to look inside, fear growing in his chest. He stood in the doorway seeing his mother’s - his mom’s - covered body laying lifeless, arm handing over the edge of the bed. You were nowhere to be seen, a stray shoe laying discarded on the floor.

The paper bag crashed to the floor just as his entire world began crashing down around him. Tears welled in his eyes as he neared the bed falling to his knees, spotting the crumpled photograph directly underneath her hand on the floor. The tears spilled from Vincenzo’s eyes as he held her wrist softly, everything hitting him and being processed through his mind. In that moment he swore he would find whoever was responsible for her death. He would find you and fight to keep you safe. He wouldn’t - couldn’t - allow you to suffer the same fate because of him.

~~~

Hanseok tore the pictures in half as he smirked after having met Myunghee’s gaze as she hung up the phone. He looked over at you sitting on the floor, your hands bound and mouth gagged, with an equally sinister grin as he tossed the pictures in your direction. They were images of Gyeongja and you in her hospital room. Neither of you were aware you were being watched. Hanseok rose to his feet, sneering in your face as he did so, before grabbing Myunghee by the hand and beginning to waltz around the room with her as they both let out manic laughs.

Tears welled in and spilled from your eyes as you realized what must’ve happened. Gyeongja must be dead. They’d killed her. They’d order for her to be murdered. And they let you live as live bait for the one person they were truly after.

Vincenzo.

Hanseok stopped dancing, laughter still falling from his lips as he looked over at you making his way to you. With brute force, he forced you to your feet, holding you up with one hand, fingers pressing painfully against your jaw and cheeks.

“You have got a temper,” he scolded. “I don’t like being ignored. But seeing as though you clearly mean something to that consigliere, I may just be able to get more than enough use out of you before throwing you away.”

Fear coursed through your veins as you looked at the eerily cheerful man. No remorse or even regret was evident, which scared you even more. This man wasn’t normal, that much was evident. And right now you really wished he was. That he would be capable of having some guilt. But you knew he wouldn’t.

“Call Hanseo and Seunghyuk,” he ordered. “We’re celebrating a victory tonight.”

~~~

“All right,” Hanseok sighed, holding a glass of liquor in his hand. “Tonight, we’re going to drink ourselves stupid.”

“Sir,” Hanseo began glazing over at you sitting on the floor beside him. “Why are you in such a good mood?”

“Because I just killed Vincenzo’s mom. And I happen to have his other most prized possession at my beck and call,” he spared you glance, hand pulling your hair roughly knocking you over. Hanseo and Seunghyuk were clearly shocked by his words. “Can you imagine? Finally reunited after 30 years, then BAM!”

“What?”

“I mean, poor guy. It must be killing him. Mother dead. Girlfriend missing,” he laughed.

Hanseo looked at you in shock, heart pounding his chest. He could allow anything to happen to you lest his own plan be ruined. Seunghyuk looked at you momentarily before looking at Myunghee, “Were you aware of this?”

“What’s wrong?” Hanseok asked. “You disappointed in me?”

“Oh, what? No, sir,” Seunghyuk stuttered, laughing hesitantly as he looked at you struggling to sit back up. “I’m worried about the consequences. That’s all. I mean, the poor girl. Can’t you treat her a bit more, humanely?”

“He’s right,” Hanseo agreed. “Why would you go and poke the bear, sir? And to treat her like this?”

Hanseok bit the inside of his cheek, staring at the two men, before looking down at you and scoffing.

“Of course you two are in agreement…since you’re such good buddies,” Myunghee commented.

“Excuse me?” Seunghyuk questioned meekly. “Just what are you saying? Hey, Ms. Choi-”

Hanseo stood up, “How dare you speak to me like that?”

“Please, I’m just stating a very simple fact.”

Hanseo huffed looking at Hanseok who couldn’t look any more disinterested in the conversation watching you struggle as he played with his glass, “Come on, sir! She’s exaggerating. He saw I was struggling with some business stuff, and he was helping me out.”

Hanseok’s gaze flitted to him almost as if daring him to keep lying to him.

“I’m afraid that doesn’t explain all your secret meetings,” Myunghee added leaning forward, her foot jutting out and kicking you. “Not to mention the meetings you’ve had with this one.”

Seunghyuk and Hanseo began arguing with Myunghee - who kept her cool - attempting to climb out of the hole they’d unknowingly put themselves in. Whilst Hanseok continued playing with the glass as he foot began tapping against your head rather harshly. You couldn’t decide whether you wanted Vincenzo to come and get you out of this situation or pray he kept his mind straight and focused on taking Babel down. But knowing him as well as you did, you already knew he’d rather get shot time and time again before allowing any of these people to get away with his mother’s murder and your kidnapping.

The three continued arguing as Hanseok forced you up and gripped your face tightly, not looking at you as he watched them go back and forth.

“You’ll all end up just like this too,” he whispered, a smirk on his face. “Just watch.”

You jumped back as a bloodied man came running through an entrance stopping the begging from Seungyuk to Hanseok to believe him as Myunghee screamed from shock. For the first time in a while Hanseok looked slightly shocked as he spotted the man, the same man who had been in the hospital room. The man you could only assume murdered Gyeongja.

He was muttering something incomprehensible to your ears before a gunshot echoed through the air, a bullet being fired into his torso. Followed by another through the back of his head. Your heartbeat sped up as you shuffled backwards attempting to distance yourself, Hanseok holding you in place. Everyone was shaking and whimpering in fear as the man’s body fell revealing Vincenzo standing there gun aimed and ready to fire another shot.

From where you were you could see the blood on his hands and face, his bruised and bloodied knuckles and cold expression reminding you just exactly who it was you were with. He never hid it from you but you’d never seen him like this - this cold. He’d never allowed you to see this side of him. Not even when you left Italy after Paulo attempted to have you both killed in his apartment.

There wasn’t a single emotion in his eyes as he stared blankly at Hanseok, gun aimed at him. He didn’t glance at you as he walked forward calmly, eyes trained on the man holding you firmly beside him. Fear settled in your stomach as you stared at the barrel that was pointed in your direction by sheer chance. He moved his arm and pointed the gun at Myunghee who cowardly fell down then to Seunghyk and Hanseo who hid behind the couch, before going back to Hanseok who continued to stare him down. His eyes flitted to yours for a split second twitching his head slightly, before going back to Hanseok’s. He began firing the gun in different directions forcing everyone to take some sort of cover - even you. Glass and porcelain shattered upon contact from the bullets. With Hanseok covering his head, you took your chance to move away from him as best as you could, struggling as you did so.

With you out of the way, Vincenzo aimed the gun once more at Hanseok as he made his way closer, giving you a chance to crawl behind him. He lowered the gun helping you stand and giving you a brief once over before turning back to the man he was there to give a message to.

“Murdering my mother…kidnapping my woman…those were unforgivable and absolutely foolish actions,” he said monotonously. “I knew that you killed countless people and even tried to kill me. Do you know why I haven’t killed you?” he paused looking at the gun. “It's a hassle.”

Hanseok looked up and Vincezo took a few steps forward, your feet staying glued to the floor where you had been standing behind him.

“I had a job to do. So putting a bullet in you, wasn’t worth wasting my time over. I’m not sure your measly sidekicks would inconvenience me much.”

He took a seat on the couch.

“But now…you all have to die.”

There was an exclamation of ‘don’t kill me’ and whimpers as he paused, staring directly in front of him before he continued speaking.

“Don’t worry. It won’t be tonight. I live by this principle: ‘What a blessing it is to have a painless death.’ I’m going to give you two things you’ve earned. First, the humiliation of a lifetime, and second…a slow and agonizing end to your life,” Vincenzo turned his head to Hanseok. “I swear.”

He looked away, “You can take care of that garbage. And don’t even try pinning his death on me or it will be all over the news…who hired my mother’s killer.”

Vincenzo rose back to his feet, beginning to walk back in your direction before stopping as he made a noise as if he’d remembered something, going back to Hanseok who crawled backwards as Vincenzo lifted the gun and took aim, cocking the gun, “Here’s a preview for all of you.”

He moved the gun a few centimeters before firing it, taking off a chunk of Hanseok’s ear, his scream filling the air. Vincenzo turned back around walking briskly in your direction and grabbing your arm, pulling you with him as he left as though he were leaving a very rough legal meeting.

~~~

Vincenzo was bent over his mother’s body crying as you stood beside him, unsure of what to say or do. The man who had always been so strong and fearless, void of much emotion was breaking down before your very eyes.

“Ma,” he cried over and over again as he sobbed. “Ma.”

~~~ “You should get some rest,” you offered as you stood beside him near the memorial front of the funeral home. “You’ve had a rough time.”

He looked over at you, the bells chiming and drum beating at the monks chanted something consistently, but didn’t say a word before looking away. Everyone from the plaza was there with him offering some semblance of support but clearly mourning and feeling the pain Vincenzo was feeling himself.

~~~

Vincenzo sobbed into the scarf his mother had asked to be given to him. The words she’d written in her letter pieced his hardened heart over and over again as he read them. He sobbed as he leaned forward on the small table. You walked over from the kitchen and sat beside him wrapping your arms around him tightly, allowing him to cry into you.

“We’ll make them pay,” you whispered tears welling in your own eyes as he arms pulled you tightly against him. “We’ll make them pay for what they’ve done.”

#kdrama imagines #kdrama scenarios #vincenzo #vincenzo masterlist #vincenzo cassano #park joohyung #vincenzo cassano imagines #vincenzo cassano scenarios #park joohyung imagines #park joohyun sceanrios

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darkstar225 · 7 months

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Twice's 10th member is in a secret relationship with Red Velvet's Seulgi

A/N: Heyyy, I'm coming up with a lot of stuff for you guys so I can make up for the time I'm gone lol! Sry for taking so long to post :D I hope that kkrkives who gave me this idea on Tumblr likes it! :)

The request: hi, I'd like to request one where y/n has been secretly dating Seulgi from red velvet for a while now and not even her members know. and one day seulgi and y/n do a more mature collab stage and they kiss at the end shocking all the idols there as well as fans.

PS: Tysm for everyone who reads what I write, I hope I can bring a smile to your faces every time I post! I'd like to thank whoever sent me this idea 'cause I loved to write it <3

__________________________________________________________

The anticipation hung heavy in the air backstage at the MBC Music Core, one of South Korea's premier music shows. TWICE, the nation's beloved girl group, was set to perform their latest hit song, "Electric Love." The atmosphere buzzed with excitement, as fans and fellow idols gathered to watch the performance. Among the spectators was Y/N, TWICE's 10th member and maknae, who appeared as her usual cheerful self, though beneath the surface, she carried a secret that only a select few knew.

The youngest had been in a secret relationship with Seulgi, one of the members of Red Velvet, for several months. They had managed to keep their romance hidden from the prying eyes of the media and fans, a feat that was no small task considering their status as idols. Y/N loved her TWICE unnies dearly, but her heart also belonged to Seulgi, and they had cherished their stolen moments together.

As the members of TWICE prepared to take the stage, Y/N's heart raced. She knew that tonight would be different. Tonight, they were going to perform a special collaboration stage with Red Velvet. It was a secret project that TWICE's sunshine and Seulgi had been planning for weeks, and the anticipation was almost unbearable.

The moment arrived, and the lights dimmed as the audience erupted into cheers. TWICE and Red Velvet took their positions on stage, Y/N standing between her fellow TWICE sisters and Seulgi beside her fellow Red Velvet members. The music started, and the idols began to sing and dance, their energy electrifying the stage.

As the performance went on, Y/N and Seulgi exchanged secret glances and smiles, their love for each other shining through their eyes. It was a love that had flourished in the shadows, a love they had hidden from the world, but tonight, they had decided to take a risk, to let their love be known.

As the final chorus of "Electric Love" approached, the crowd's excitement reached a fever pitch. The hot couple had planned something special for this moment, something that would shock everyone in attendance. They moved closer together, their hands almost touching as they sang the final lines of the song.

And then it happened.

In a move that was as surprising as it was passionate, Y/N and Seulgi closed the small gap between them, their lips meeting in a searing kiss. The audience gasped in shock, and the other members of TWICE and Red Velvet looked on in astonishment. It was a kiss filled with love and longing, a kiss that declared to the world that their love could not be hidden any longer.

The song ended, and both girls pulled away from each other, their faces flushed with a mixture of embarrassment and exhilaration. The crowd erupted into a cacophony of cheers and applause, and the other idols on stage could only stare, their mouths agape.

As Y/N and Seulgi made their way offstage, they were met with a flurry of questions from their fellow unnies and the Red Velvet members.

Sana - Baby, Seulgi unnie, what just happened? *wide eyes*

Y/N and Seulgi exchanged a glance, knowing that they couldn't keep their secret any longer.

Y/N - We're in love. *shrugs*

The confession hung in the air, and the other members of TWICE and Red Velvet looked at them in shock and disbelief. But then, one by one, the shock gave way to smiles and understanding. They had suspected something was going on between their girls, and now it was all out in the open.

Wendy - That was the most romantic thing I've ever seen!" *exclaiming with a grin*

Y/N's older sisters gathered around her, offering their support and congratulations. They hugged her tightly, and Nayeon, mom number 2, spoke up.

Nayeon - We're happy for you, sweetheart. We just wish you had told us sooner.

Tears welled up in the younger girl's eyes as she hugged her members back.

Y/N - I'm sorry for keeping it a secret, but I love you all so much, and I was scared of how you would react. *sobs*

Mina wiped away her cute dongsang's tears with a smile.

Mina - We're your family, honey. We'll always support you.

Seulgi's Red Velvet members echoed similar sentiments, and soon, the two groups were mingling and celebrating the newfound love between Y/N and Seulgi. It was a moment of joy and unity that would forever be etched in their hearts.

As the night wore on, news of the unexpected kiss spread like wildfire among fans and the media. Social media exploded with photos and videos of the moment, and fans from all over the world expressed their love and support for Y/N and Seulgi. The idols had taken a risk, and it had paid off in the most beautiful way possible.

The couple, hand in hand, faced the storm of attention and scrutiny together. They knew that their love would be tested by the spotlight, but they were determined to face whatever challenges came their way. They had found a love worth fighting for, a love that had blossomed in secret and now shone brightly for all the world to see.

In the end, their love story became an inspiration to many, a reminder that love knows no boundaries and that true love could weather any storm. And as they stood together, facing the future hand in hand, they knew that they were stronger together, that their love was a force to be reckoned with, and that they were ready to face whatever came their way, together. And at the same time, this made the other girls look at them with smiles on their faces thinking:

We are so proud of our chosen family.

A/N: I’m sorry for any errors, English is not my first language. Pls, let me know if there is something wrong, ty for reading <3

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fayeforrosie · 2 years

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I Will Love You

Irene x Reader

Irene knows your struggling. She knows that your mental health is challenging you. So, she decided shes going to try and help you the best she can, only to find out that she's fallen deeply in love with you.

The first moment you saw Irene you hadn’t really thought much of her. Sure, she was pretty, and smart, and was kind enough to help tutor you in math, the subject in which you struggled the most in. However, with all the astonishing things that came with this beautiful woman, your heart just couldn’t feel anything for her... or anyone. It wasn’t like you didn’t like her, not at all, however with everything that you were going through, it was just too hard to actually find room in your heart to love someone.

Irene knew that you were struggling in your classes before you even knew who she was. Furthermore leading her to the decision of going up to you and finally saying something about helping you with some of your classes. You told her you would think about it, as there is many things on your plate and you don’t believe that you would even have the time to meet up with her, nonetheless, by the end of the day you hunted her down around the campus to tell her that you would do it, but only every other day for an hour.

On the days that you met, Irene was very soft with you and you found comfort in just talking to her. She was of great help and even assisted in boosting your math grade up from a D to a B-, which was “a great start” as Irene would say.

On the days where you wouldn’t meet up, Irene spent almost her entire day planning a sort of “lesson” for you and would even go to the extent of making various worksheets on her computer and printing them out for you to do with her. Sometimes she would make them a little longer just so she could be with you, and sometimes she would purposefully give harder questions so you would ask her about it and she would be able to talk to you a little more.

You didn’t speak much to Irene. You weren’t the one to speak at all really, rather your body language would give a hint at your mood for the day. Irene knew this, and didn’t push you much to speak, however she did push you academically, knowing that you needed it.

It didn’t take Irene long to notice that you were seriously struggling with a sort of mental disorder, however she didn't ask you about it and just kept the knowledge to herself. It hurt her to know that you where struggling so much, especially when evidently knowing that she was in complete love with you.

Everything about you she was in love with. The way your face would scrunch when you where struggling with one of the problems that she had given you. The way you would struggle to keep yourself awake during some of the sessions and she would have to encourage you by giving you all the reasons why the lesson mattered. She loved how shy you would get when you listened to the abundance of compliments that she would toss your way, knowing that you didn’t receive many in your life.

After about two months of Irene tutoring you, you ultimately came to the conclusion that you had grown feelings for her as well. You weren’t comfortable with saying you were in love with her yet like Irene knew she was, however you knew that she was the only special person in your life that could recieve these sort of feelings from you. Nevertheless, you only kept these feelings to yourself, and although you started acting a bit more comfortably around Irene, you never shared how you felt about her, nor have you thanked her for everything she’s done with you. She knew you were thankful, she could tell, however she still contemplated over the thought of if you even loved her as a friend.

No matter how many negative signs you gave about your feelings, Irene still continuously put all her time and effort into making you feel better. She would often stay up until early morning, simply researching facts about how to encourage someone to talk about their feelings more, or how to help someone who is struggling with a mental disorder. She learned many facts about depression that she didn’t know, and took those deeply into consideration.

It seemed, as the tutoring sessions went on, that Irenes entire life now just revolved around you, and she was completely fine with it.

Irene had dreams of waking up by your side and making you breakfast before you woke up, subsequently bringing it to you in bed, where she would lay a sweet kiss on you cheek, and then lips, and you would wake up with a smile to the pancakes she had made you. When in bed, Irene would pretend that you were next to her, sleeping peacefully in her arms, knowing that everything was going to be ok.

That’s all she wanted.

One day, when meeting with Irene for a study session, you noticed that she was not in the usual spot where you two would meet up at for the past five months. Curious, you looked around the library and found her reaching for a book from one of the shelves. Irene felt your presence, and turned to see you looking up at her with a face written of confusion. You didn’t say anything, but only stood there and watched as she finally got hold of the book that she was reaching for.

“Oh y/n, I was waiting for you to come”, she moved a bit closer to you, the book in hand. “This book will help for your history test coming up, if you want we can sit down here and I can read it to you”, Irene said with an anticipating smile. You only nodded and sat beside her on the carpet, watching as she flipped to the first page of the book.

Irene noticed how close the two of you were, picking up on the increase of her heartbeat while she tried her best to keep her composure.

Irene began to read the first page of the book she had at hand, reading a bit slower than she normally would because she knew that you had a hard time picking up on different information quickly. Irene was always considerate like that. She learned so many things about you over the past months, that she was able to adjust how she acted towards you to make you feel more comfortable.

After the first chapter, Irene book-marked the page you were on and closed the book softly. You watched as she brought her attention to you, looking up into your eyes and holding a compassionate glare over you. You knew she was waiting for you to say something... maybe your opinion on the book, or what you were confused on. Not knowing what to say, you slowly raised your head. Now looking at her, you noticed things you hadn’t noticed before, such as her beautiful, soft pink lips, sealed together as she waited for you to speak. You noticed the slight blush dancing across her doughy cheeks, heating up by the second with each moment the passed by.

For the first time in you life, you felt a feeling that you would have never thought you’d feel before... love. Everything that she did for you came back to you in a montage. All the nights she’d spend passed library hours just to help you understand a question on you assignment. All the times she would make you little study guides with little notes of encouragement next to each question. All of the consideration she would have for your mental illness, and how she would attend to your feelings and the effects of your health.

Irene was there for you when you didn’t even know you needed someone, and now looking at her, you can’t help but feel so much for the girl in front of you.

You couldn't admit that you were in love yet, however, you most certainly knew that there was room in your heart for her. You knew, just by looking into her eyes, that once you recover from your mental instability, she was going to be the one you loved. You knew that one day she will be the one that you will hold onto at night, knowing that everything would be ok.

From Irene’s perspective, she couldn’t tell at all of what you were feeling, but she knew that something was going on in your mind. She’s never seen this look on your face in her entire time with you, and she was scared to assume that it was something bad, or something that you couldn’t talk to her about.

However, with all the mixed up feelings that were jumbled in her head, she was pulled away from your thoughts as she watched your face lean in closer to hers. Irene became nervous, thinking of what you were intending to do, and the endless possibilities that could happen at this exact moment.

Subsequently, without a second thought, your lips pressed against hers mournfully for the most long-awaited kiss that Irene had dreamt of since the day she fell in love. Irene was in shock, however she felt an abundance of feelings all at once, and decided to just let them go at the moment. She closed her eyes, leaned in to you, and poured out all of the emotions that she was feeling into this life-changing kiss.

Irene brought her hand up to your cheek, cupping it softly as she leaned in closer to you and kissed you desperately, wanting nothing more than for this moment to last forever.

You brought your hand to her arm, holding it tightly so you wouldn’t fall back from the intensity of Irene’s kiss. You attempted to give the same intensity, and as a result, you brought your hand up from her arm and onto her shoulder to pull her impossibly closer and deepen the already fathomless kiss.

After what seemed to be an eternity, however still to short for the both of your likings, you pulled away and opened your eyes, only to be met with a pair that spoke all of the things that you couldn’t bring yourself to say. Irene stared into your eyes with a look of desperate love. She couldn’t help but allow a tear to trickle down her red cheeks as she realized that her feelings were hopefully reciprocated. Irene thought of all the restless nights she’d spend just thinking of you and how desperate she was to just have you laying by her side, even for a moment. She had never thought that these hopeless thoughts were ever going to become a reality, however, in the moment, a flash of hope for the both of you leapt through the faltered air, and this spark of hope was the cause of Irene’s breakdown.

Irene pulled you in, squeezing you as tight as she possibly could and used your shoulder as something to cry on. She dug her head deep into your neck, letting the endless emotions she had been feeling, all out at once. You held her close, scratching her back and whispering sweet nothings into her ear for a few minutes until she finally calmed down just a bit.

You felt a bit out of place when she finally looked back up into your eyes with her tear stained cheeks and bloodshot eyes. You were never the person that someone would go to with their problems, as you never really knew how to deal with them yourself. Whenever someone would ask you for even just the slightest advice with something, your mind went blank and you would ultimately shake your head towards them and leave them standing wordlessly ahead of you.

That’s why, holding Irene close to you as she stared into your eyes like there was no tomorrow, was something so unusual that you felt like passing away and never coming back to this moment again. Although you finally found the anguished feeling that you had long been looking for all this time, you still didn’t know what to do with them, so instead, you just stared back into her eyes and awaited what she was going to say.

“Y/n”, she finally broke the silence, her voice sounding as though there was nothing left to it, broken from all of the crying she had done just seconds ago on your shoulder. You nodded your head and waited for her next words.

“I...”, she paused and shook her head, debating on whether this was a good time to tell you that she was absolutely, deeply in love with you. “I... I’m sorry”, she resulted to saying.

Your eyebrows furrowed before you responded. “What do you mean?”

“I... I don’t know how to say this but I assume this is the right time to finally tell you...", Irene took a deep breath and prepared herself. “I’m in love with you Y/n. I am so, so in love with you. I have been since the day I met you, and every night I beat myself up knowing that I’ll never be strong enough to tell you, and things between you and me will never get past being friends. There has never been a day that has gone by where I don’t imagine a life with you and me in the future, together. I’ve wanted this for so long and now that it’s finally happening I really don’t know what to do. That’s why I cried. It’s cause I’ve just dreamt this moment for so long and it finally came, and I’m just so happy that I don’t know what to do or say. But now I do Y/n. Now I can tell you that I love you, and even if you don’t feel that strongly as I do for you, I will never, ever stop loving you. You are the best thing that’s happened to me Y/n. I really mean it when I say it. I love you, truly."

It took you a couple seconds to fully register Irene’s words. You have never known someone who has ever had feelings for you, never mind being in love.... and in addition to that, they are confronting their feelings to you in person. You felt captivated. Your emotions seemed to have emotions themselves. It was like those little characters in your head that controlled how you felt had decided to flee. You didn’t know what to say, because as you said, this has never, ever happened before. You weren’t even exactly sure how you felt about her. You had only just realized yourself that you had such deep feelings for her. Now, knowing that she was in love with you, you contemplated your own thoughts. Is there a chance that you really do love her as well? Are you only thinking this because she’s the only person who has ever given you this sort of attention, so now you feel obligated to feel the same? Maybe you don’t even like her. Maybe you only felt like this because she is the only person you have ever been close to.

Pushing these thoughts aside to be worried about later, you finally gained the courage to just let your heart do the talking. You knew you liked her. You knew you wanted to be with her. All of the overthinking was just in your head, and you needed to let her know your true feelings.

“I-Irene...”, you stuttered as you tried to gain confidence. This was your first time ever doing this, and hopefully your last. “I um... I have feelings for you as well. I don’t know exactly how I feel yet, but I just know that whenever I’m around you... I just want to stay there with you, forever. When you help me, and talk to me like I'm just a normal person, it really makes me feel loved. I’ve never had these feelings before, but I just know that they mean something good... something amazing. I hope, as we get more comfortable together, that I ultimately realize this fluttering feeling that I have inside is love. But... for now, all I can say is that I have feelings for you... and I hope you can understand and accept that. Everything is new to me. I didn’t even know I was capable of having these feelings, but here I am. Thank you Irene.”

You looked into her eyes, both you and her had the utmost tears flowing down your blushed cheeks. The two of you hadn’t even notice that you both were crying, but you just let it happen. You let your feelings overcome you and expose something wonderful, and you were proud of yourself.

“Y-Y/n...”, Irene smiled, her glass eyes squinting in happiness. She looked at your like a proud mother watching her daughter finally pass high school, except you knew that this was her way of showing love. You noticed that she would give this type of look to you often, and now, you realized what it meant. It meant she was in love. All this time when she would look into your beautiful eyes, she fell in love deeper, and you had just come to this realization.

Irene wanted to say something, but she really couldn’t. Everything was just too perfect... so instead, she took your hand and led you to stand. Once upright, she wrapped her arms around you and pulled you in to a tight, caring hug.

You wrapped your arms around her waist and buried your head into her warm neck, smiling to yourself. As you held tight onto her body, letting all your troubles go and your tears flow freely from your closed eyes, you realized that you were home. Irene, the girl that you knew was there for you since you needed it, was the only person who could really, truly make you happy.

"I will love you Irene... eventually... when I know I am capable of doing so."

Hi everyone!! This is my first fanfic on tumblr!! I hope you enjoyed!! I plan to write many more for many other idols!! Irene is one of my ult biases and I had this imagine stuck in my head for so long so I just had to share it with others haha. I have been struggling mentally for some time and felt that this was a good way to portray how I feel and how others may feel as well. If anyone out there who is reading this is struggling as well, please feel free to message me! :) If you have any recommendations or questions feel free to message me as well!! It's always open!! I really only write for girl groups so if you recommend a male idols I might not write it:(( But anyway... I hope everyone enjoyed, please follow for more as I will be posting often and will write all recommendations!!

#irene bae #rv irene #bae joohyun #red velvet #irene imagines #irene scenarios #irene x reader #red velvet imagines #irene #kpop #fluff #romance #confession #falling in love #college au #tutoring #mental health

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multiphandomunnies · 1 month

Text

Irene

better

not enough?

freezing

accidental

thank you

can’t wait (slightly *M*)

foreign arrangements

foreign arrangements part two

harry potter au

soulmate au

come with me…

lavender

what’s mine is yours

(*T*) online shopping

please don’t tease (*M*)

i want you here

(*T*) tic attacks

lovely

join me?

anything else?

highlighters

distance is fine

why do you need to know?

kissing irene

single mom au

this isn’t over

fluffy cloud

questions

heartbreak for your happiness

don’t lie to me

cold and stoic

something screamed

ms. popular

girlfriend irene

#red velvet #kpop #kpop imagines #kpop scenarios #kpop fluff #kpop angst #kpop reacts #kpop reactions #bae joohyun #irene red velvet #red velvet imagines #red velvet fluff #red velvet scenarios #red velvet angst #irene fluff #irene angst #irene imagines #bae joohyun imagines

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redveluvd · 2 years

Text

irene <3333

#irene #bae joohyun #bae irene #redvelvet #red velvet imagines #red velvet smut #irene moodboard #irene icon #irene icons #irene packs #irene smut #irene imagine #irene red velvet #reveluv #red velvet scenarios

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seullovesme · 3 months

Text

irene gf texts pt. 3

sorry it's really short, i'm running out of ideas rn the lightbulb is off 💡😕 i need ideassssss

#seullovesme » posted!#irene x reader #irene texts #irene fic #bae joohyun x fem reader #bae joohyun x reader #joohyun x reader #joohyun imagines #bae joohyun #kpop gg #kpop #kpop fanfic #kpop imagines #kpop texts #red velvet x reader #red velvet imagines #red velvet scenarios

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justalonelybitch · 2 years

Text

Perfection

Irene x F!Reader

Genre: Yandere AU

Warnings: Stalking, Breaking and Entering,

Word Count: 890

Buy me a coffee :)

The cold nipped at her porcelain skin, wind whipping in her face as she tugged a cap over her head. Her eyes darted around in desperation, flickering over several masked faces in the bustling crowd. She began to grow impatient, perfectly shaped eyebrows furrowing doubtfully. The sun rapidly descended from the clouds, the chill of the night ushering people inside. But Irene remained still, body tense as she lingered behind, pretending to occupy herself with her phone.

She unconsciously gripped her device tighter, knuckles turning white as she clenched her jaw in frustration. You were supposed to be here, she always waited for you after your shift. So why were you so late? Irene liked to think you were teasing her, purposely depriving her of your presence for you knew how much attention she carved from you. You truly were cruel, insisting on keeping her waiting like some dog on a leash. She was wrapped around your finger, willing to do anything just to see your pretty little face. So she waited.

The faint clacking of heels along the pavement alerted Irene, her gaze subtly lifting to catch a glimpse of its source. There you were in all your glory. Time had graciously slowed for her, blessing her with the opportunity to take her time as she admired your beauty. The wind blew the hair from your face, giving her a good view of your angelic features. A coat hugging your figure, ravishing legs exposed all for her. The moon kindly illuminated you, skin glowing in the moonlight as the stars twinkled in your doe eyes.

A smile tugged at the corners of your rosy lips, dimples on display just for her, she loved little thing about you. The scent of your soft perfume invading her senses as she breathed it in, allowing herself to become intoxicated by your sweet smell. Her eyes briefly fluttered shut in bliss, a sigh escaping her as she relished your fragrance. She was hooked, addicted to everything about you and she couldn't get enough. She stared intently as you neared her, watching as you raised a perfectly manicured hand to brush the stray strands of hair from your face. She always despised how they tried to hide your perfect face.

Her heart beat thumped obnoxiously loud in her ears, the pounding in her head becoming nauseating as she fought to steady herself. Irene curled her hand into a fist, fingers aching to trail over your delicate skin. She wanted to lock you up in a glass case and cherish your perfection for the rest of her life, to devote herself to you. She would do anything to have you to herself.

Her pupils dilated when you finally reached her, she was dizzy, head spinning as she fought to remain conscious. She wouldn’t dare miss the chance to catch a glimpse of your pure angelic beauty. Your mere presence had her so frazzled and yet you seemed utterly unfazed. It irked her, you didn’t even spare her a glance. Irene trembled as your shoulder brushed against hers, it took all her strength to her as she willed her knees not to give out. Butterflies filled her stomach, a fluttering mess inside her. It was a sign, just another part of your sadistic game.

Her head spun as she trailed behind you, taking the familiar route to your apartment. Smiling giddily, bursting with joy as she let her mind flood with thoughts of you. She beamed as you trudged up the final steps, keys jangling in your hand as you inched closer to the door. Lingering behind you, she was courteous, letting you pass through the threshold before her, slipping in silently behind you.

Irene frowned as you tiredly shuffled to the kitchen, letting her eyes wander around the apartment. It was exactly like she’d imagined it to be, perfect, not a thing out of place. She flinched in surprise at the sound of glass shattering, her head snapping to your suddenly rigid figure. She tilted her head in concern, sinking her teeth into bottom lips as she edges closer to you. Several pieces of glass now decorated your tiled floor, tainting the perfection.

Your eyes were bulging out of your head, your mouth hung open in shock. For every step she took forward you took one back, ending your short lived game of cat and mouse as your back hit the sharp edge of the counter. “What is wrong, love?” She asked, worry written on her face. You stood frozen in shock, eyes a swirling pool of emotions, unconsciously holding your breath. Your chest tightened as she reached out to you, a shrill scream ripping from your throat at an painfully loud volume.

Irene scowled in disappointment, swiftly clamping a hand over mouth, muffling your panicked yells for help. “Shh, baby. It’s okay, I’m here,” she purred in your ear. Your eyes were wide with terror, squirming in her grasp as you desperately tried to break free. She kept you pinned to the counter with her hips, palm pressed firmly to your lips as she waited for you to clam. Huffing, she relented, finally releasing you, “are you okay? You had me worried,” she voiced, gently caressing your cheeks with the soft pads of her thumbs.

You stared at her, dumbstruck by the events that had occurred. Your mouth opened and closed like a fish, no words passing through your pink lips. Fear was present in your eyes. You felt so terrified, yet oddly calm at the same time. “Please tell me what’s wrong?” She asked, frown etched upon her face. You widen your eyes incredulously, baffled by the nerve she had. She awaited your confession silently, eyeing you intently.

“Who are you?” You asked unsteadily, voice wavering in terror.

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ireneanon · 2 months

Note

omg milf irene falling for reader who is good with her kids... imagine the hot sex after the kids go to sleep 🤭

coming soon

are we ready for a teaser?

I have about 3 milf Irene related stories in drafts and after receiving the 1000000000000th ask for milf Irene I guess I’m finally releasing one sometime soon…

#irene scenarios #irene x reader #bae joohyun x reader #red velvet x reader #irene smut

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sodamvelvets · 2 years

Text

“it’s not you i want- part two”

bae joohyun x fem reader, park sooyoung x fem reader (platonic)

highschool!au (everyone is 18) + fake dating

warnings: swears, a nonconsensual kiss, violence

summary: your feelings become muddled as your best friend’s plan begins to come to fruition, just not in the way either of you expected.

word count: 11,504

part one | part two

a/n: apologies for taking longer than i intended to with this part, i ended up rewriting a lot of it, but i think it was for the better. thank you everyone for your kind reception to the first part, and for waiting so patiently. additionally, i’m sorry about the length the original 7k word count i projected was heavily off, whoops. regardless, please enjoy ;)

Frustration fills you as you sulk to class, Sooyoung by your side and matching your every stride, and for once, she’s not the cause of your bad mood. Theoretically, you should be fairly pleased right now, there are only a few days left until your project is over, and better yet the end of your relationship with Sooyoung, but even those manners can’t manage to cheer you up, your thoughts too focused on tomorrow’s volleyball game, the first of a tournament that could eventually take you to regionals if you win all your matches. However, this doesn’t seem likely to you based on your teammates’ frequent blunders and overall incompetence during practice lately. Unlike you though, Sooyoung seems optimistic, reminding you often that the number of practices has doubled over the last week, leaving the team stretched thin and exhausted, which is why much to your displeasure, she’s canceled practice today.

“Seriously, Y/N?” Sooyoung calls to you as you purposely quicken your pace, an exasperated sigh escaping her lips as she jogs to keep up with you. “You know it was the right call.”

Still, you ignore her, not even acknowledging her presence until you’ve reached your classroom and headed to your seat, carelessly dropping your bag on the floor, but still remaining standing as you turn to face your best friend with crossed arms. “We’ll see if that stays true tomorrow.”

Sooyoung grins, and you can’t tell if it’s because you’re finally talking to her again or she’s just that sure of herself. “It will,” She assures. “Hey, have you asked her to the game yet?”

You fight back the urge to groan. Sooyoung has only become more determined over the past week and a half, especially after your study session with Joohyun, which after much pestering from her end, you had recounted to her in its entirety, well mostly. Your skin still warms at the memory of Joohyun’s lips on your cheek and while it might be important for your best friend to know, you thought it best to keep it to yourself for now as you remained unsure of Joohyun’s intentions. Plus, the fresh memory of last weekend and the transformation of Sooyoung’s dejected grimace to a hopeful smile when you had tentatively brought up the reason for her break up was still ingrained in your mind, the moment repeating itself tortuously every time you considered telling her.

“But ‘I think so’ means there’s some part of her that’s unsure about whoever she likes,” A soured expression crossed Sooyoung’s face before she continued optimistically. “That means I still have a chance.”

“That’s one way to look at it, “ You shrugged, ignoring your internal guilt for your doubtfulness as you concerned yourself with watching Sooyoung’s two younger sisters, Jiyeong and Minji, both of who were spitting images of your best friend and just as devious, while they played with the family dog at the nearby park, their elated squeals cutting through the humid spring air as they chased poor Haetnim in circles.

You had always enjoyed babysitting Sooyoung’s siblings with her, having a well-known soft spot for the two that often resulted in them convincing you to buy treats for them, and the pair of Melona wrappers in your hand made no exception to that, much to Sooyoung’s scolding.

“You’re such a downer Y/N,” Sooyoung groaned, poking your side, but the upwards curl of her lip told you she didn’t mean it.

“I try,” You deadpanned, prodding her back. Your eyes widened. “Shit! Minji!” You shouted after the younger girl as she lobbed something (that you could only hope was mud) at an unsuspecting Jiyeong, resulting in a loud cry as you ran after a giggling Minji trying to catch her before she could get into more trouble, while Sooyoung followed behind you, laughing the whole time.

“Y/N?” Sooyoung snaps her fingers at you, and you blink at the recollection, bathing in it. It felt nice, the mundaneness of it all, like everything was normal again. You promise yourself to savor the feeling. “Did you hear me? I asked if you-”

“No,” You reply shortly, cutting her off, your gaze flickering to the doorway to see if Joohyun is coming. “Not yet.” You can practically feel your best friend roll her eyes as she lets out an irritated sigh.

Bae Joohyun. Aside from Sooyoung and your volleyball team, she’s become your other problem lately. You’ve gotten to know the older girl quite well over the past two weeks, even better than how you previously knew her after your library study, and you’re not completely sure how but she’s managed to get you to open up too, something she seems fairly proud of, especially so when you told her you hadn’t made a friend since Seulgi. Truthfully, you’re surprised at how different Joohyun is from how you perceived her, she’s nowhere near as mature and reserved as you once believed, but rather bold and playful given the chance. She’s told you more about herself than you ever knew there was, and you’ve vowed to remember every part, from her favorite color being purple, to her hatred of coffee and chicken.

You feel almost guilty for not knowing this side of her already, despite orbiting in the same circles for a brief period, you never made an effort to get to know her, much to Sooyoung’s disappointment. You didn’t talk with her much you realize, not because you didn’t like her, but simply because you weren’t interested, you had a feeling she would be just another passing figure in Sooyoung’s life, so why bother with the formalities and fake conversations if they wouldn’t matter in three months. You never ignored her completely though, in fact occasionally during the times when Sooyoung would invite you along on a date with her and Joohyun in an attempt to get you to talk with the brunette you’d carry out short conversations, most of which were meaningless and all of them painfully uncomfortable. Looking back on it now, you regret not being more amiable.

But none of those moments were relaxed like the moments you have now. It’s nice having someone besides Sooyoung to share your life with. Yet it’s somehow also stressful, what was once a rarity now seems to be a commonality, the weird, inexplicable feeling you get around her during your average conversations to your most intimate moments. You’re not sure what it means, after all, you’ve only been truly in love once and your baseline idea of love doesn’t quite feel the same. This time it’s different, instead of a simple sense of euphoria, there’s now a constant buzzing deep in your chest too, and warmth in your heart. You don’t know what to call it currently, but you know you can’t tell Sooyoung about it, so you’re left alone to ruminate in your own thoughts, and the only thing you’ve become certain of is that it’s impossible not to get lost in everything about Joohyun. At least, you finally understand, just a bit, why everyone around you is so in love with her, and why Sooyoung is trying so hard to get her attention back.

“Why haven’t you invited her yet?” Sooyoung questions, reminding you of her original inquiry.

“I forgot,” You say honestly. “I’ll do it today.”

Sooyoung nods, accepting your answer, and the two of you begin talking about random things until Sooyoung obnoxiously clears her throat, motioning behind you. Rolling your eyes, you lightly punch her in the shoulder, before turning around to see Joohyun. She’s dressed more casually than usual today, wearing a loosely fitting sweatshirt and high-waisted jeans with her hair down in mused waves, a large contrast to her typical button-up blouse or knitted sweater. You can’t help the smile that briefly appears on your face as she approaches the two of you, her expression unexpectedly blank.

“Hi,” Joohyun looks between you and Sooyoung, who’s moved her hand to wrap around your waist. Joohyun’s jaw visibly clenches. “Sorry for interrupting,” she says, her voice taut.

You frown, tilting your head. Recently, you’ve started to notice the small things about Joohyun, like how she smells nearly everything she touches or constantly tucks her hair back while talking, and it certainly hasn’t escaped your attention that recently she’s become tense around Sooyoung, acting almost if she was upset by something your best friend was doing, or maybe it was you. The thought makes you deflate slightly.

Beside you, Sooyoung smirks, seeming to observe Joohyun’s reaction as well. “It’s fine, we were just finishing up.” Unexpectedly, your best friend’s lips are suddenly pressed against yours, and you’re barely able to register it before she pulls away, wearing a sickening grin on her lips. Your eyes immediately go to Joohyun, who’s staring at the two of you in disbelief and something else you can’t quite decipher. You find yourself numb to the anger you should be feeling, more consumed with worry as Joohyun’s gaze meets yours, and you swear you see a glimmer of hurt in her brown eyes before it’s gone, replaced by neutrality.

“No problem,” She says, her tone pleasant. “Let me know when you’re done,” She calls, walking away to go meet Jisoo.

“What the hell Sooyoung!” You exclaim, the shock wearing off as you pull out of her grasp, struggling to keep your temper from flaring now that Joohyun is gone. “Why would you do that?”

But Sooyoung doesn’t hear you, she’s far too caught up in celebrating Joohyun’s reaction to care about your annoyance. “She’s totally jealous.”

“Sooyoung, do you hear me?” You hiss, grabbing her chin and forcing her to look at you, but you let go as soon as you notice your classmates’ eyes on you. “Why would you do that?” You repeat, evening out your voice.

The pleased grin Sooyoung wears fades at your words as her lips turn upward in an uncharacteristic sneer. “Why would I do that?” Sooyoung echoes, more mockingly than seriously. “You know exactly why, and I don’t see why you would suddenly care about it now. What, do you like Joohyun too?”

You're sure she didn’t mean the last part, but you still turn away unable to look your best friend in the eye. “No,” You reply firmly. You can’t like Joohyun. You can’t betray Sooyoung like that.

“Then what’s the problem?”

You glance at Sooyoung, shaking your head and breathing out deeply. It occurs to you how badly you’d like to slap Sooyoung and truthfully it takes everything in you not to, as you force yourself to ignore the nagging voice in your head telling you to strike back for once, but as usual, you manage to control yourself, focusing on the calming thought that in three days this arrangement will be over. There’s no point in arguing with Sooyoung when you’re so close to the end. You can acknowledge the problem you have was not with this kiss itself, but the effect of it. Still, you push down that thought, silently choosing to keep your word and continue with Sooyoung’s games, hoping that after you can fully resolve the seemingly ever-growing pile of issues with her.

“You should leave,” You mutter finally, biting your tongue to prevent the temptation of saying anything more.

“Why?” Sooyoung asks incredulously, practically bristling.

“You just should,” You say, your gaze shifting to the back of Joohyun’s head as Jisoo mutters something to her. “Please,” You add flatly.

Sooyoung stares at you, and you can tell she’s trying to figure something out, perhaps why you’ve chosen to be so cordial, but eventually, she gives up and leaves. You let out a huff of air as Sooyoung disappears into the hallway, sighing as you make your way towards Joohyun, and nodding gratefully to Jisoo as she quickly excuses herself upon your arrival.

“Hey,” You greet, sitting down next to Joohyun. She doesn’t look at you, and admittedly you’re hurt by this, but you choose to ignore it as you continue. “I'm sorry about my, uh, girlfriend.”

“It’s fine,” Joohyun insists. “I don’t care, remember?”

“Right,” You say, ignoring the feeling that she said that more to console herself than you. “Well even if that’s how you feel, I’m still really sorry, and if there’s anything I can do to make it up to you let me know.”

“How about a date?”

You choke. “Sorry?”

“I’m joking,” Joohyun says with a laugh, poking your stomach. “Free tickets to your game would suffice.”

You dip your head to hide your flustered state, before sinking a little further into your seat, cursing the universe and its way of making unwanted conveniences materialize. “I can get you two,” You say finally. “But don’t let anyone find out or my coach will kill me,” You add lightly, a soft smile crossing your lips.

Joohyun grins. “Well, we can't have that can we?”

“No, we can’t.”

Joohyun’s mood seems to improve greatly after that, especially when your teacher announces they’re leaving early and you can have the rest of the period as a free block. Soon enough you find yourself accompanying Joohyun to lunch, your fingers thrumming gently against the metal of the cafeteria bar and tapping out an uneven beat while you watch Joohyun distractedly reach for a pre-prepared meal as she chatters in your ear about relatively meaningless things.

Unwilling to interrupt her, you gingerly take hold of her slim wrist, feeling her almost unnervingly soft skin briefly tense at your touch before she relaxes, glancing at you with an inquisitive look that makes your breath catch in your throat and your hand quickly jump to the back of your neck. “That one's chicken,” You mumble abashedly, looking anywhere but the brunette. “It’ll make you sick.”

Joohyun tilts her head, eyes squinting subtly as the corner of her mouth curves upwards before she wordlessly grabs a different packaged lunch. “Not chicken,” She declares proudly, holding it out for you to inspect.

“Not chicken,” You agree, an adoring smile subconsciously appearing on your lips before you turn away, browsing for your own lunch until eventually settling on an unpopular soup and rolling your eyes when Joohyun begins to playfully berate you for your choice, only stopping when you lightly hit the crown of her head, prompting a melodramatic yelp but nothing else.

“Aren’t you going to go be with Sooyoung?” Joohyun asks as you hover behind her, absentmindedly picking at the plastic wrapping on your spoon while she finishes swiping her meal card.

You puff your cheeks, paying for your food and peering over at your usual spot where your best friend waits with the rest of your teammates, the empty seat next to her clearly meant for you, despite your earlier spat. Common sense tells you it would be best to sit with her, to resolve any tensions and keep up your charade, but the way your heart cracks when you notice the glimmer of hope in Joohyun’s eyes at your hesitation leads you in another, less rational direction.

“I’m sure she’ll be fine without me for one day,” You say, and the beaming grin Joohyun gives you is immediately worth it as you allow the older girl to take you by the arm, and lead you to the school’s senior longue, where a handful of other people appear to be waiting for her and a few others, the only one currently there that you recognize is Jisoo, who seems surprised yet also pleased to see you.

“Y/N,” She greets with a nod, a smirk plastered on her lips, her amused gaze meeting Joohyun’s and causing you to glance between the two as Joohyun only shakes her head, drawing out an unexpected chuckle from Jisoo before she delves back into a conversation with the girl on her left, leaving you confused and looking to Joohyun for clarification.

“Don’t worry about it,” She says, pulling you down to the ground where you take a seat, back against the wall, a millimeter of space between you and Joohyun.

Admittedly you feel out of place as you eat your lunch, unable to remember the names of any of Joohyun’s friends, save for Roseanne, the blonde who showed up later, but you only knew her from hanging around Joohyun so much, recognizing her to be Jisoo’s girlfriend that you’d met twice before at a group study and you’d gotten on well enough with her. Still, you opt to only listen as the brunette talks with her friends, watching her reactions with interest and every once in a while you’ll politely chime in when Joohyun pushes you to, but for the most part, you’re content to just silently follow along and observe. Eventually, Jisoo and Joohyun’s friends disperse, heading back to their classes, leaving the three of you behind, having no interest in returning to your classroom to carry out the rest of your free block.

“I like having you as my partner,” Joohyun says softly after a few moments of silence, and you can’t help but notice Jisoo watching you two in the least subtle way possible.

“I do too.”

“You’re not going to ditch me when this is over, right?” Joohyun asks, gaze meeting yours, and although her voice is laced with a joking tone you can tell it’s all but that. “We’ll still talk?”

“Of course,” You say. “I’ll never leave you.”

Joohyun nods in contentment, leaning into your side, her head moving to rest on your shoulder as her hair tickles your cheek and for once, you register, your body doesn’t go rigid at someone else’s touch. However, that doesn’t mean you’re not surprised when her arm hooks around yours, clutching it as her eyes flutter shut, a soft sigh escaping her lips.

“Tired?” You murmur softly in question, looking down at the smaller girl as she turns to hide her face in your neck.

You can feel Joohyun’s lips curve into a smile. “A little.”

You swallow, ignoring the sudden chill you feel. “We have a bit left, you can take a nap if you want?”

“Will you wake me up?” She mumbles.

“I will,” You say, offering her your pinky which she takes with a laugh. “I promise.”

You begin to feel wary as you notice Joohyun’s chest rising and falling slower while she sinks into a deep sleep, and you’re suddenly hyper-aware of the girl sitting across from you. You’ve always felt off around Kim Jisoo, not because you didn’t get along with her, but because you always had an odd sense that she knew more than she let on. Like you, she’s clever and perceptive and her smirks and glances begin to replay in your mind as you watch her type something into her phone. You can’t help but feel leery, an inkling of paranoia filling you as you wonder if perhaps she has figured Sooyoung and you out or at least come close. If anyone were to figure you out, it would be Jisoo, and the realization doesn’t exactly console you.

“You two would make a good couple,” Jisoo hums suddenly, making you jump. Her stare is fixed between you and Joohyun, her trademark analytical look back on her face and you’re sure she’s judging you, but for what you’re not sure. “I approve.”

Your eyes widen. “I don’t like her in that way,” You say adamantly, ignoring Jisoo’s arched brow. “And I have a girlfriend,” You hastily add on, cringing at how your last sentence came out as more of an unconvincing afterthought than anything.

“Right,” Jisoo chuckles, and you swear there’s a hint of knowingness in her voice as she continues. “But if you didn’t.”

You open your mouth to respond but you falter, realizing you have nothing to say and Jisoo seems to take that as an unspoken answer, going back to what she was doing as if nothing had happened, as if what she’d said wasn’t threatening to unravel the very thin veil you’d crafted between yourself and a forbidden thought you had long ago, pushed away into the deepest dredges of your mind.

But if you didn’t. The words ring in your head. If you weren’t fake dating Sooyoung, and if up until recently you weren’t so sure Seulgi was the only one for you, if you had just gotten to know Joohyun without your best friend’s hovering and constant check-ins, then what? What would your life be like? You look to your side, at Joohyun, whose gentle breaths brush against your neck. You reach to push a strand of her hair aside and when you look up, Jisoo is once again watching you.

“I-” You begin, but Jisoo interrupts you.

“I know,” She says.

You’re unable to hide your shock in time and Jisoo notices it donning an enigmatic smile, for a moment you contemplate playing dumb, but you know there’s no point. “How?” You ask finally.

Jisoo tilts her head, looking at you like the answer is the most obvious thing in the world. “Because,” She gestures between you and Joohyun, “You never look at Sooyoung the way you look at her.”

An hour later, you’re walking down the halls towards the exit, your bag hitched on your shoulder as your own thoughts consume you. Joohyun didn’t wake up until you tenderly shook her awake just minutes before the end of the day, and the tired grin she gave you was enough to make your heartbeat quicken. You’d half expected Jisoo to blurt out your secret then and there, but true to her word she said nothing, and you hoped she’d keep her promise as she drove home with Joohyun. In a way, it’s freeing knowing that someone else knew of your charade, but at the same time, you feel guilty, the weeks of deceit catching up to you in one single stride as you think of Joohyun. You don’t like lying, even if it’s for the sake of your best friend. You resolve to tell Joohyun everything once everything is over, and the weight on your consciousness feels subtly lighter.

“Hey! Y/N!” A voice, which you’re easily able to recognize as Sooyoung’s, calls from behind you, followed by heavy footfalls and eventually a hand on your shoulder. “Why didn’t you stop?” She huffs, not exactly out of breath, but clearly a little affected by the exertion.

You raise a brow, unamused. “Do you really want me to answer that Sooyoung?”

“No, ” Sooyoung sighs, going silent and allowing a growingly palpable tension to settle in between the two of you. “I’m sorry,” Sooyoung says a few beats later. “About earlier.”

You glance at Sooyoung for a moment, before looking away, not responding as you continue to walk, twirling the keys to your car on your finger in thought. Truthfully, you’re no longer upset with her, at least not as much as you were previously, but you’re still hurt. You’ve come to the conclusion that over the past month, Sooyoung has changed into someone you no longer know, her obsession with Joohyun taking up her life and leaking into yours as she drags you along in this stupid plan, and you can’t help but wish you hadn’t let yourself get into this. And maybe you’re naive to think this, you realize as you notice Sooyoung beginning to leave, but you can’t help but hope that in two more days it will all go back to normal.

“Hey, Sooyoung?” You call, causing her to turn around. “I’m sorry too.”

Sooyoung smiles softly. “Thank you.”

///

Your fingers run over the hem of your volleyball uniform, anxiously fidgeting with your shirt before you take a deep inhale, beginning to stretch out your legs and arms. You notice that more people than usual line the stands today as you glance over to the crowd and despite your growing unease, your gaze instinctively skims through it, searching for the comfort of a certain brunette, but much to your disappointment, you’re unable to spot her.

“Feeling alright?” Sooyoung asks, her words startling you out of your distracted state as she places a consoling hand on your shoulder making you tense and she quickly lets go of you with an apologetic look.

You reach for your neck. “Yeah,” You say unconvincingly, and your best friend arches a doubtful brow. “You?”

Sooyoung shrugs, her eyes falling towards your teammates, an unimpressed hum escaping her as you witness Seungwan overshoot her serve. “Could be better,” Sooyoung remarks, crossing her arms.

You shake your head. “I’m sure we’ll do fine.”

“Hey,” Sooyoung peers at you, her lip quirked upwards. “Since when are you the optimistic one?” She teases, nudging your side.

“You’re insufferable,” You groan, rolling your eyes and letting out a huff while you try your best to appear unaffected by her provocations, but after years together it’s hard to hold back your amusement around Sooyoung and the smallest of laughs manages to worm its way out of you.

“See? You don’t really think that,” She declares, attempting to hug you but you push her away and she feigns insult, grasping her arm theatrically.

“I definitely do,” You assure her flatly.

“Sure,” Sooyoung concedes, although her tone is still playful. “By the way,” She starts casually after a few beats of silence. “Have you seen Joohyun?”

“No,” You resist the urge to frown, the reminder of Joohyun breaking you away from the normalcy of the moment, and tearing you back into the reality of your stress-filled charade. It’s bittersweet, how you find your heart aching for a time one month ago when your relationship with Sooyoung wasn’t so strained and centered around someone else. But at the same time, you also find yourself realizing that you could never let go of your precious memories with Joohyun, a twinge of yearning making itself known at the mere thought of losing her. You grimace, it reminds you of how you felt when Seulgi told you she was leaving.

“But I thought you invited her?” Sooyoung asks, shoulders slouching.

“I did,” You reply, looking over to the crowd again and you’re almost embarrassed by how hopeful you are that you’ll find the girl that is quickly becoming your favorite person, or, you peek at Sooyoung, second favorite.

“She’s over there,” Sooyoung murmurs, elbowing you and jutting her chin towards your left.

You follow her directions with a raised brow, spotting Joohyun alongside Jisoo. She laughs at something, the amusement reaching her eyes while she joyously claps her hands, and even from afar her presence relaxes you. As if sensing your stare, Joohyun’s dusky eyes suddenly meet yours, her smile widening as she waves softly at you, eagerly pointing at her shirt which you see has your school logo on it and sending you a thumbs up. You sheepishly return the gesture, before her attention returns to Jisoo, who is pointing at Sooyoung and whispering something into Joohyun’s ear, the brunette reacting to whatever was said shyly and ducking her head. Inexplicably, a burning flash of nausea sweeps through you, leaving you momentarily shaken, before you recenter yourself.

You turn to Sooyoung, expecting her to celebrate Joohyun’s acknowledgement and you’re confused to be met with an inquiring expression, her gaze flickering between the two of you, but she seems to shrug it off, an easy-going grin returning to her lips, and you find your unknowingly tense shoulders loosening.

“Did you see that?” Sooyoung asks, an ecstatic tone to her voice that reminds you of the energized way her younger sisters speak to you.

“Yeah,” You blink. “I did.”

But you don’t get to say anything else as your coach calls you and Sooyoung over, the two of you sharing a glance before jogging off to meet them and the rest of your team, your anxiety returning as you remember with a grimace what’s at stake.

The game goes well enough, with your team winning by a sliver of a point difference, something you’re not too pleased by but accept nonetheless, after all a victory is a victory, and you’d be lying if you said you played your best, your eyes frequently wandering towards Joohyun in between sets, effectively distracting you a few times and garnering you a few blunders as well as ugly stares. But the worst part of it all you realize with a grimace as Sooyoung trots up to you after the match wearing a wide grin, is that you have to admit that she was right, or at least acknowledge it. For once it seems, Sooyoung made the right decision by canceling practice yesterday.

“I told you,” She teases, jostling you playfully once the two of you have started cleaning up the remnants of your match, your teammates having been dismissed earlier with the rest of the crowd as you and Sooyoung took responsibility for what was left. You’re slightly disappointed to notice that Joohyun hadn’t stayed behind, but you brush it off, telling yourself you shouldn’t care, but even the voice in your head doesn’t seem too confident.

“Whatever,” You roll your eyes, not wanting to give Sooyoung the satisfaction of admittance to defeat, but that seems to spur her on even more, her mockery only increasing while you ignore her unamusedly, until finally you take your water bottle and squirt her in the face with it, which manages to shut her up as she sulks soaked through the rest of your duties, while you on the other hand, suddenly feel quite cheerful, even beginning to hum softly under your breath.

“Are you sure?” Sooyoung asks you five minutes later, her hesitance clear after you’d told her she could leave without you.

“Yeah, it’s fine Sooyoung, you go ahead.” You urge, lifting your jersey pointedly with a crinkle of your nose. “I don’t think I can wait until I get home to take this off, I’ll be seconds behind you.”

Your best friend seems to contemplate this before letting out a defeated sigh. “Alright,” She says, hoisting her bag over her shoulder. “Just let me know when you get home.”

“Will do,” You promise, watching her as she leaves, before you split off towards the corridor to the locker rooms, stopping to turn off the massive rows of lights illuminating the gymnasium first and securing the doors behind you.

You twirl the keys on your finger as you walk, your steps echoing through the empty halls and your thoughts begin to drift off, more specifically to Joohyun and the sickening feeling you’d gotten when she had smiled at Sooyoung, even just remembering it makes you feel unwell. You grit your teeth, looking up to the ceiling and taking a deep breath.

A long time ago you’d felt that same feeling when Seulgi had convinced you to go out with her to a concert, her begging words impossible to say no to and while you’d enjoyed it, the night was forever tainted in your memory by the exact same rumbling discomfort in your chest you’d felt earlier, because coincidentally, Seulgi’s ex, Lisa Manoban was there too, and watching them reunite left you queasy as they reminisced and discussed commonalities you and Seulgi didn’t have, like her passion for dance. You’re not a jealous person, that had always been Sooyoung’s role (and her ongoing scheme proved it), but for the first time in your life, you felt truly jealous, even if only for an unreasonable second as you’d later find that you got on quite well with Lisa who you recalled had semi-jokingly told you to her call if you and Seulgi broke up.

But that situation was different from today. You were dating Seulgi, and for a moment your insecurities got the best of you, but with Joohyun? You were just friends, not to mention that you two had only begun regularly talking two weeks ago even if it felt like a lifetime with the amount of things she had coaxed out of you so easily, things that had taken your own best friend over a decade. Joohyun was special to you, in a way you’ve never experienced before, but so was Sooyoung, so why were you so annoyingly jealous of her, when in reality you should be happy for her, pleased that at least this stupid plan was coming to some form of fruition. But Jisoo’s comments from yesterday echo in your head once more, and you curse the girl.

For the first time, you allow yourself the tantalizing admittance that maybe you like Bae Joohyun before you rapidly lock the thought away in a box and shove it under a metaphorical rug in your mind, cringing at yourself and feeling guilty for even formulating such a taboo notion, thinking of your loyalty to Sooyoung and hastening your stride, focusing on doing what you had to do and going home, where hopefully you can forget everything, but those musings quickly fade as you notice someone lingering outside the changing area, your eyes narrowing and body tensing but when the person turns to you, you relax as you’re met with the very girl who has your brain tying itself in knots.

“Joohyun?” You call, managing to compose yourself before you speak, confusion lacing your tone as you approach her. “How long have you been here?”

“A bit,” She shrugs looking at you with a smile that makes your chest seize up, your earlier revelation returning to you and you swat it away, reminding yourself of Sooyoung, which seems to ground you.

“And what if I hadn’t shown up?” You can’t help but tease.

Joohyun crosses her arms, tilting her head. “I would’ve found you eventually,” She answers confidently.

You bite your lip, secretly quite charmed by her as you attempt to mask how flustered you feel. “Right then,” You mutter under your breath, suddenly taken by the sight of your shoes, and Joohyun appears to be entertained by your behavior.

“I wanted to talk to you,” She clarifies, sparing you from yourself and you think you catch a hint of nervousness in her voice. “If that’s okay?”

You swallow, forcing yourself not to read too much into Joohyun’s request and centering yourself. “Is there something I should be worried about?”

“I don’t think so.”

“Okay,” You concede, “Do you mind if I change first?”

Joohyun suddenly coughs. “Not at all,” She mumbles.

You're surprised when she follows you into the locker rooms, having expected her to wait outside, but admittedly you don’t mind the company, once again drawing comfort from her. However your jaw locks when you’re greeted with another unexpected shock, but unlike Joohyun, it’s wholly unwelcomed as your narrowed gaze falls upon your least favorite teammate who stares back at you with a grin.

“Jennie,” You greet tersely. “What are you doing here?”

“Sorry Kwon,” Jennie replies, knowing the use of your last name irks you. “I just came back to get something I left behind,” The younger girl looks between you and Joohyun with a smirk that makes you feel uneasy, and you sense Joohyun shift uncomfortably beside you. “Well, I’ll leave you two to it!” Jennie declares cheerily with a wave before walking off and you find yourself holding your breath until you hear the door slam shut.

Silence settles between you and Joohyun, neither of you wanting to address what just happened, and you too tired and figuring she wouldn’t care, begin to change right there. Joohyun seems to watch you intently as you pull your uniform shirt over your head before she registers you’re observing her reaction curiously. She rapidly turns her gaze away with a choked apology. You think she’s blushing but you ignore the thought, continuing with your routine until you’re done and tapping her shoulder to let her know she can look again, but when she turns she just stares at you.

“You’re very pretty, you know?” The brunette breathes out suddenly with a hum and for a moment she appears to be dazed by her own words as if she hadn’t meant to say them aloud, but she seems to shrug it off and it’s clear her usual self-assuredness has returned as she reaches to cup your cheek. Her touch makes your skin prickle and your thoughts short circuit.

“Surely that’s not what you wanted to tell me,” You manage to respond eventually, albeit unsteadily.

“What if it was?” Joohyun challenges before she shakes her head, dropping her hand. “Sorry,” She sighs, glancing beyond you. “You’re right. I wanted to ask you something.” Joohyun pauses for a long second, “Just promise me you won’t lie.”

“I promise,” You say, but there’s a seriousness in her tone that makes you shift your weight, highly aware of a building sense of anxiety in your stomach, and you’re certain that whatever her question is is going to change things between you two, and you can only pray it won’t end negatively, your heart not able to even take the thought of losing Joohyun as you begin to brace yourself

Joohyun chews her lip, a fleeting look of hesitation crossing her face and she takes a deep breath, her expression evening out as her eyes bore into yours. “Why are you pretending to date Sooyoung?”

For a moment you’re stunned, your thoughts halting in place as you’re unable to process anything, and everything seems to spin rapidly around you. You feel ill, struggling to hold yourself up while a sickening wave of nausea surges through you, everything incoherent as you force yourself to speak. “What? That’s-” You choke on your words as even more panic rises in your chest. “That’s not-” You squeeze your eyes shut, your head pounding.

“Y/N,” You can feel Joohyun grip your shoulder, steadying you. “You promised not to lie,” She reminds gently, her voice sounding far away yet you can still recognize an underlying hurt in it that makes you crack.

“I’m sorry,” You manage to murmur, opening your eyes but refusing to meet her gaze and your mind begins to straighten out as you calm yourself, shame still searing through you. “I’m so sorry,” You repeat, hoping Joohyun knows you’re apologizing for everything, every lie and every millisecond of deceit. “I just wanted to help Sooyoung.”

There’s a long beat of silence, and you force yourself to glance at Joohyun, who remains frozen, until suddenly her arms are wrapped around you pulling you into a hug, her fingers running through your hair while you continue to utter a stream of apologies and you’re certain it’s not real, that you’re imagining it in place of how she really reacted, until you hear her whisper against you, “It’s okay, I forgive you.”

An overwhelming sense of ease washes over you as you squeeze her back, and for the first time in weeks, you feel relieved, overjoyed to no longer have to lie, the guilt washing off of you. “How did you know?” You ask minutes later, and Joohyun shocks you by laughing, the air around you instantly lightening.

“I didn’t,” She answers honestly, pulling back from you, her hands still resting on your shoulders. “I just had a feeling something was off and Jisoo told me to act on it,” Joohyun grimaces. “I promise I wasn’t expecting it to work out how it did.”

“Shit,” You groan, thinking back on the past couple of weeks, and realizing while you and Sooyoung’s act might have been believable for those who didn’t truly know you, it was painfully suspicious to those who did, and as short as the period was that Sooyoung and Joohyun had dated, they still shared some level of intimacy that would’ve allowed Joohyun to notice the oddities in Sooyoung’s behavior, which even you realize, was much different from how she usually acted in relationships. It was foolish to ever think you had a chance with someone as perceptive as Joohyun or even Jisoo mingling with you, and it occurs to you, in an almost satirical way, that Jisoo, although pushing Joohyun in the right direction, had kept her promise and not told Joohyun.

“Can I ask you one more thing?” Joohyun questions.

“Sure,” You say, registering that it doesn’t matter anymore now that Joohyun knows, you can tell her anything and in a way, it’s freeing.

“Why did Sooyoung want to do it?”

There’s a beat of silence while you wrack your brain for an elegant answer before you give up, realizing there is none. “She wanted to make you jealous,” You respond simply, and in hindsight, you cringe at your best friend’s poorly formed plan. “She thought you’d get back together with her if you saw us dating.”

The older girl hums thoughtfully. “Well, at least one part of it worked.”

You snort at her, thinking she’s making a joke, the thought of Sooyoung’s scheme working is quite amusing to you, but when you look at her, expecting her to let out a chuckle, you realize she’s being genuine. “You’re serious? Then why aren’t you with her?”

“I wasn’t jealous of you,” Joohyun laughs, staring at you incredulously. “I was jealous of Sooyoung.”

“Oh,” You say dumbly, your mind making the connection, and suddenly Joohyun’s past behaviors make more sense to you, the kiss on the cheek, her discomfort around Sooyoung, the joke about the date, and it makes you go numb, overwhelmed by it all, yet you also buzz with elation. Your own buried feelings break through the chains you had long since latched them in, breaching the surface and you know you can no longer hide them anymore, maybe if they were for anyone else, but when it comes to Bae Joohyun, you know it’s impossible. For once, you’re certain of something, and that’s that you like Joohyun, a lot.

“Y/N, I like you. I know I said I didn’t care, but I do care, a lot,” Joohyun says, reaching to hold your chin, a vulnerability in her dusky eyes that you’ve never seen before and she shakes her head, smiling awkwardly. “You don’t have to like me back though, I just wanted to tell you because-”

“Joohyun,” You cut her off tenderly, the pain in her voice is too much for you to let her continue. “I like you too.”

Joohyun appears shocked at first, her expression wide-eyed before it transforms into a delicate grin, her fingers shifting to gingerly stroke the messy hairs hanging in your face to the side, and she leans closer to you as your mouths nearly brush against each other, her hand moving to gently trace the shell of your ear. “Can I kiss you?”

Your breath catches in your throat, blood pounding in your ears as you manage a nod, and she leans in, pressing her lips to yours. They’re plush and soft, drawing you in deeper as both you and her pour thousands of unspoken words into your kiss, your heart thundering, while you allow yourself to get lost in her alluring scent and overwhelming touch. Everything within you seems electrified as you move against each other, Joohyun’s arms wrapping lovingly around your neck, the weeks of your denial and her building jealousy finally forcing its way out of the two of you and molding itself into something new, beyond the simplicity of love and passion. Nothing else existed, nothing else even mattered, except for Bae Joohyun, and she knew, drawing you in further and further, to get more and more lost in her sweet taste and soft skin as her fingers teasingly sweep up and down your abdomen, leaving trails of burning fire in their wake. A gasp escapes you, but Joohyun smothers it, pressing closer to you with a spur of intensity that sends you reeling, the only coherent thought on your mind being of her.

“You’re the one I left her for,” Joohyun says breathily as she finally pulls away from you, resting her forehead against yours, her brown eyes sparkling with adoration.

“What?”

“I couldn’t be with her knowing I liked someone else,” She murmurs, caressing your cheek. “You’re the reason why I broke up with Sooyoung.”

“Sooyoung,” You echo, the once far away thought of your best friend coming rearing back as a feeling of panic rises in your chest causing your legs to collapse, your body unexpectedly slipping from Joohyun’s comforting grasp as you sink to the ground, head in your hands. “She’s going to kill me Joohyun,” you whisper. “She’s going to hate me.”

“She won’t hate you Y/N,” Joohyun says, sitting next to you and moving your head to press against her breastbone as she begins to draw soothing patterns on your back, whispering honeyed words into your ear and patiently guiding your sporadic breathing back to normal.

“How am I going to tell her?” You ask.

Joohyun looks down at you, her expression not exactly hopeful. “I don’t know, but she’s your best friend, she’ll understand,” Joohyun assures. “It will work out.”

You nod slowly, choosing to believe her words as you lean further into her, trying to forget your problems and focusing on Joohyun’s assurances, which you repeat to yourself even a half-hour later, as you arrive home and pull your phone out to text Sooyoung with a pang of guilt, leaving her message on read when she questions what took you so long.

“She’ll understand,” You mumble to yourself half-heartedly, already beginning to think of how you could ever explain this to your best friend.

///

Your parents aren’t home, having gone out to a corporate party that would last well into the night when Sooyoung shows up at your doorstep. Her hair is slick with rain, matted down and stringy as small drops of water drip off her, and when you blink you’re reminded of a night that was so long ago, yet somehow feels so fresh despite the immeasurable changes that have occurred since now and then. When Sooyoung was standing on your porch soaked and shaking and you pulled the newly heartbroken girl into your arms, murmuring consoling words into her ear as you held her tighter than you’d ever held her before. But this time isn’t like that you register, observing the blankness in Sooyoung’s brown eyes and you resist the urge to step back when you catch the angered twitch of her lip.

Possibilities for her fury begin to run through your head, recalling the way she had looked at you with gentle worry just two hours ago, a clear cut contrast to the venomous way her gaze bores into yours now, but you realize there’s no point in sifting through possibilities. There’s no point in pretending to be ignorant or remaining in denial. You know why she’s here. Possibilities didn’t matter anymore, not when you had a definite involving the now shared center point of both your lives, Bae Joohyun, and you knew that this was the last straw. You and Sooyoung were two moons fighting for one orbit, and the only ending was disaster and collision, a deadly finale of an explosion you saw coming from kilometers away barrelling towards you. No Joohyun, you thought, her comforting words returning to you, things would not be okay. And suddenly only two questions remained within you, how had Sooyoung found out, and how would you tell her?

You clear your throat. “Hey.”

But Sooyoung doesn’t bother to greet you back, instead, slipping past you as a growing dread begins to fill your stomach, and leaving you to silently close the door behind her and follow her into your kitchen, watching cautiously as she reaches into one of your cupboards for an empty glass, her familiarity with your home becoming less comforting and more haunting.

“Did you know that Bae Joohyun kissed someone?” Sooyoung asks suddenly, her tone chillingly casual as she turns on your faucet.

Your breath catches for a moment taken aback by her bluntness, before you manage to make it even out, still keeping an arm’s length distance from the older girl as you lean against one of the counters, forcing yourself to meet her gaze and not allowing yourself to be intimidated. Your jaw sets as you look into her rage-filled glare. “Really?” You ask, choosing to play dumb and buy yourself more time, foolishly hoping you can figure out a way to deescalate your impending doom, but the choice only makes the bubbling guilt within you rise as you realize your deceit, and you can feel bile rising in your throat.

“Really?” Sooyoung mocks, arching a brow. “I just figured you would know,” She looks to you for an answer, sipping her water, and placing it down painfully slow but you remain silent, feeling more sickly by the second. “Since there’s this picture,” She continues. “And the person in it looks an awful lot like you.”

Dazed by her revelation, you blink as your mind splits itself into multiple directions, before it hones in on a single passing moment finding your answer. Jennie Kim. She must’ve snuck back and caught you and Joohyun. You swallow, and for the first time, your resolve flickers, eyes widening briefly before you regain control of your appearance, but not fast enough to escape Sooyoung’s notice as she abruptly grabs your wrist, forcing you closer to her. “Was it you?”

You grit your teeth as Sooyoung’s nails dig into your skin, looking her dead on and you know you can’t lie to her, even if you did she’d see through it. “It was,” You admit, forcing your voice to reamain steady while your lie collapses around you, filling you with shame. “It was me.”

“I fucking knew it!” She exclaims with a harshness that you’ve never heard before. Sooyoung releases her grip on you, her hands jumping to hold her head as she starts to pace the room, seething and throwing volleys of insults your way while you observe, taking it quietly until she turns on you, her expression dark as she laughs. “You’re the one she left me for.”

“You just figured that out?” You bite back, unable to hold your tongue any longer, your meekness cracking, choosing for once, to not let Sooyoung push you around so easily.

“You don’t deserve her,” Sooyoung states. “And when she realizes that, she’ll leave you too, just like Seulgi.”

The words are like a slap to the face, your insecurities on full display and flooding you with humiliation that rapidly transforms itself into a fit of raw, unfiltered anger you’ve never felt before. “And you think you deserve her?” You challenge, tilting your head. “After all you’ve done is treat her like an object, acting like she was just another trophy to add to your collection and not a real person! At least I have the decency to see her as a human being and not as you called her, ‘a future celebrity’ for you to show off!”

Sooyoung bristles, scoffing cruelly. “You are such a fucking liar Y/N. I never did any of that.”

“Never did that?” You echo incredulously. “Then what do you call trying to manipulate her into loving you again with a fake girlfriend? Is that not treating her like an object?”

“Oh quit acting so high and mighty,” Sooyoung sneers, pressing a finger into your chest “You agreed to help me!”

“Because you’re my best friend!” You shout, pushing her away from you, glowering and suddenly every tightly wound string within you finally snaps, breaking apart like a ball of rubber bands as weeks worth of resentment rushes from you, oozing through your blood and turning it cold. “All I ever wanted was for you to be happy Sooyoung,” You breathe, exasperated. “And I thought this would help, but it only made everything worse. I know I agreed, but the difference between you and me is that I regret it every day and I swear I will spend my life trying to make it up to her if I have to. But you?” The rage in your voice only seems to grow. “You’re a selfish brat that doesn't give a single shit as long as you get what you want!”

Hurt seems to flicker in Sooyoung’s eyes as you finish speaking, but only for a split second as they abruptly quickly turn dark, dangerous almost, and you’re stumbling backward as she shoves you hard, seizing you by your shoulder as you make impact with the countertop behind you and punching you square in the jaw, your head whipping to the side with a groan. Sooyoung seems to recognize the gravity of what she’s done as she releases you, her expression bewildered as she backs away leaving you to prop yourself up. The metallic taste of blood begins to fill your mouth and you wipe your lips staring at Sooyoung with a similar look of shock, and suddenly she no longer looks like the Sooyoung you know. You tenderly reach to rub your aching jaw, the hit not having been hard enough to cause serious damage, you note thankfully, but the pain is still agonizing.

And it occurs to you that you were wrong. Things between you and Sooyoung will never be the same, or at least not in the way you wanted, even if you were to forgive her right now. You always thought she needed you, and she did, but in a way that was different from how you needed her. Maybe it was your fault, for choosing to remain blind to the growing fracture of your relationship, you were no longer the two young girls who begged their mothers for extra sweets, but rather two strangers divided, and perhaps it was meant to be like this. Perhaps you never followed the same paths you thought you did. There comes a point when something is too broken to be fixed, too poisoned to be cured, and is that not where you are now? The shattered pieces of your relationship are too small, fine, and fragmented to possibly find them all, nonetheless glue them back together. No, it could never be the same.

“I’m so sorry,” Sooyoung finally utters, her voice cracking.

But you ignore her because for some inexplicable reason you don’t care anymore, you’re numb to the pain in her tone. All you can think of is yesterday. Yesterday when you promised Joohyun you’d always be there, and you know that no matter how much you may want it, you can’t have both Joohyun and Sooyoung. You have to choose. And as you look at your best friend for the first time without clouded vision, you can finally see that you don’t know her anymore, and you haven’t for months, maybe years.

You look at Sooyoung with a grimace. “Get out.”

///

Joohyun’s delicate arms wrap around your waist, her body leaning against your side with her head resting in the notch of your collarbone as you watch the final ribbons of daylight begin to retreat over the pink and orange dappled horizon, your appearance content. The two of you blissfully stand amongst the slowly dispersing crowd on the plush fields behind your former school, a palpable jubilance dancing through the air while your classmates linger around you, some of them beginning to split off towards their own celebrations while others stay to talk. Not too far away from you, your own family sits alongside Joohyun’s chatting cheerfully, and you smile at the sight.

“They’re probably talking about when we’ll get married,” Joohyun jokes, her gaze clearly having followed yours as you wave to them.

You glance at her amusedly. “You think?”

“Definitely,” She sighs. “I can already hear them asking me tonight,” Joohyun pauses, clearing her throat in preparation to imitate her mother. “Joohyun,” She mocks, and you struggle to hold in a laugh at her awful impression. “Now that you’ve graduated don’t you think it’s time to settle down?”

“But mom,” You play along. “I’m only eighteen!”

Joohyun pinches you, making you yelp. “I don’t sound like that,” She chides, her expression serious as she tries to be intimidating, but the affection glimmering in her eyes only causes you to grin dopily.

It’s almost strange how blissful you feel around Joohyun, the feeling only having exponentialized over the past four months you’ve been dating. Bae Joohyun, you’ve concluded, is what makes you complete, and you’re determined not to let her go. But amongst the pleasurable moments, there also laid the darker ones, where with a panging ache, you remember your former best friend.

You haven’t talked to Sooyoung since that night, and there’s been no need for you either, not after you quit the volleyball team. You felt guilty, leaving them during your final tournament of the year, but you couldn’t face her, not after everything that happened, and especially not when word spread that you/d “cheated” on Sooyoung with her ex. You humiliated her, and you knew that if she didn’t hate you before, she surely did now. But truthfully, even without your best friend at your side, you’re happier than you’ve ever been. There are some emotions you can’t describe, and the way you feel about Joohyun is just that.

Joohyun is everything to you and you haven’t told her yet, but you think you love her. And although you’re sure she knows it already, you still want to tell her so desperately, but the words are caged within you, because when you try to say it a haunting insecurity begins to swallow you, overwhelming you with a lingering fear that she’ll leave, just like Seulgi, that this is all an intricate yet delicate illusion that will crumble with a single misstep. But Joohyun always assures you it’s not, and when she cups your cheek and gazes at you with the same adoration you look at her with, it’s hard not to believe her, and suddenly you find the words are caught in your throat for a different reason.

You remember calling her after Sooyoung had left, and the unbridled fury in her eyes as she saw the bruise forming on your jawline, swearing to you that she’d go kill Sooyoung there and then and you knew she would. But you begged her to leave the girl alone, to just let it go, and with reluctance she did, holding you close until your parents returned home with a barrage of distressed questions, none of which you answered. Despite what Sooyoung had done to you, you still wanted to protect her as much as you yourself didn’t understand it.

Many times you’ve realized, while lying wide awake late at night, staring mindlessly into the emptiness above, that as much as you despised Sooyoung, in a way you loved her too, and like anyone you love, a piece of her would stay with you forever. For a long time, your life was closely intertwined with Park Sooyoung’s and you knew that you’d forever treasure that, yet you also acknowledged the bitter ending, where the connection between you two began to waver and decay even as you forced yourself to remain ignorant to the fact, hoping that if you just pretended it was okay, it would turn out that way.

For many months you’d hated her for everything, clinging in a macabre way to the stabbing thoughts of how she had used you or the pain she’d inflicted on you until one day you suddenly didn’t care anymore. You just felt tired, your resentment had drained you, and your exhaustion began to affect the lives of the people you loved, including Joohyun, as you went about things half-heartedly, your bitterness clear even if you never acted on it, and that was when you recognized it wasn’t worth it. So you just let go of it, and in your own way, you forgave Sooyoung too, remembering your own wrongs, as you came to the conclusion that the blame couldn’t be placed on one of you but both. Both of you had harmed each other in your shared desperation to reach your own goals, so you simply chose to focus on the happier memories you had with Sooyoung, which admittedly made your chest pang dully, but the poisoned space she had left your heart with was finally starting to mend itself slowly with your own acceptance and Joohyun’s nurturing touch.

“Y/N?” Joohyun calls to you tenderly, gently grasping your chin and turning your face to look at her own, subtle concern flickering across her features. “Are you okay?”

You nod, smiling softly. “Of course.”

“You sure?”Joohyun questions, arching a brow, her gaze searching yours.

“Yeah,” You hum, carefully untangling yourself from her grasp to face her, moving to press your lips against hers in a brief kiss as you reach for her hand, remembering a moment, months ago when you had promised you wouldn’t leave her and just like then, you hold out your pinky. “I promise.”

Joohyun shakes her head, the corner of her mouth curling upwards as she wraps her finger around yours before placing her arms around your midriff and pulling you into her. “You’re starting to rack up a lot of promises to keep Y/N,” She says with a teasing lilt.

“Really?” You ask breathily, still very much so affected by Joohyun’s closeness. “In that case, I also promise to never break a promise.”

The older girl rolls her eyes at your words, pretending to be unimpressed by your sentimental behavior, but you can feel her hold on you subtly tighten, telling you how she truly feels as you contentedly lean into her, your head resting atop hers, each of you bathing in the other’s presence, however, the sound of someone clearing their throat behind you rapidly startles you out of your bliss, effectively cutting through your delicate moment with Joohyun as she looks over your shoulder, her jaw tensing.

“Joohyun?” You murmur, confusion lacing your voice as you remove yourself from her, turning to see what’s upset her and suddenly your posture stiffens, your gaze leveling with the familiar face of your former best friend, her stance mirroring yours despite her having sought you out. Joohyun protectively steps to stand beside you, her hand moving to the small of your back and her eyes saturate with resentment as she glances between you and Sooyoung.

“Y/N,” Sooyoung greets curtly, glancing over at Joohyun, and you’re quick to catch the flicker of sourness in her expression, your nearly two-decade friendship not forgotten as you easily read her, and you’re sure it’s mutual. “Joohyun,” She adds hollowly.

“Sooyoung,” You address her cautiously, your voice surprising you with its steadiness, a stark contrast to how you feel internally because no matter how much you’ve missed her, you’re still clouded with a wariness of her, remembering the taste of blood on your tongue.

“I wanted to say congratulations,” Sooyoung speaks calmly, but her fingers anxiously running through her hair betray her neutral appearance. “To both of you.”

You’re taken aback by her admittance, your mind already analyzing the possibilities of her intentions while you observe Sooyoung’s features, which seem to be emotionless, with an arched brow. But she gives nothing away, clearly having recognized her earlier mistake.

“Thank you,” Joohyun replies politely, surprising both you and Sooyoung as you peer at your girlfriend with widened eyes, noticing, however, that as she finishes speaking her lips are pressed together.

You nod, shaking yourself out of your stupor as you lamely add, “Congratulations to you too Sooyoung.”

Sooyoung stares at you for a long second, as if she’s committing this moment to memory, before she excuses herself, walking away from the two of you. Your chest aches, because when you blink you see a million memories, reminding you of what feels like a far off dream, and for just for a second you remember a time that seems so long ago it can’t possibly be real, when Sooyoung and you weren’t so far apart. And you’re so desperate because you can feel her slipping, and you know today is your last chance to grab hold of her once again before she floats away forever. But you can’t seem to yell out to her, your heart cracking one last time over Park Sooyoung, the girl you once considered your closest friend turned stranger, as you finally realize the inevitable, your rose-tinted fantasies crumbling into ashes.

Your chapter with Sooyoung is over, and there’s nothing you can do to extend it, there’s nothing you can do to fix it, no matter how many times you’ve relentlessly combed over hundreds of solutions, playing them out in your head despite secretly knowing the answer. You don’t mourn the loss of the perfect world you wanted with Sooyoung and Joohyun, but instead, you embrace your new reality, accepting that you were fortunate enough to have grown up with Sooyoung, and the only thing you can hope for is that she’ll eventually be okay, just like you will be, as you allow her to walk away, one final time.

“Sooyoung,” You call, and when she looks back at you, a thousand unspoken words travel between you two, and for the second time in your life, you see her cry, tears pricking in your own eyes. “Good luck.”

Sooyoung bows her head at you with a soft grin, and for a moment, it’s only you and her, soaking in bittersweetness together, the past versions of yourselves swirling around you and you can practically hear your shared childish laughter in your ears before it fades, you and Sooyoung standing at the start of two divided paths, your grasps on each other slipping.

“You too,” She answers and the connection is severed as she glances between you and Joohyun one last time before continuing on, and with one final pang of your heart, you watch her fading form disappear into the crowd.

You turn to your girlfriend, your mouth upturned in a melancholic smile that you’re sure better resembles a grimace, and Joohyun reaches to you, her thumb gingerly brushing away the remaining teardrops on your cheek. “I’m proud of you,” She whispers, pulling you into a hug that slices through your resilient facade, and the sobs you’ve been holding in for weeks suddenly escape you, your body quivering in Joohyun’s firm grasp.

But each pained whimper that leaves your lips carries a portion of the immense weight you’ve been sustaining on your shoulders and lightens the pressure on your tired soul. It’s almost therapeutic, as all your compartmentalized emotions flow from you freely, dispersing into the air and by the time you let out your last cry, you feel anew.

“I’m sorry,” You laugh, embarrassed, into Joohyun’s shoulder, shifting to look her in the eye, and wiping the wetness from your face. “I didn’t mean to cry.”

Joohyun shakes her head, her arms remaining around your waist. “Don’t apologize for that Y/N,” She rests her forehead against yours as she chuckles softly and this time she reaches for your pinky. “I have one more promise for you.”

“Yeah?”

“Promise me you’ll never apologize for crying.”

You stare at Joohyun for a moment, savoring the presence of the person you love, and not for the first time, it occurs to you, that while Joohyun might be the most beautiful human you’ve ever seen, what makes her so enthralling to you isn’t her looks but her caring and delicate deposition, and while you adore her confidence, you know that hidden under it lies a gentle girl with a timid touch who wants to be cared for as much as she cares for you.

“Of course,” You say, and she doesn’t know it, but when you speak, you’re silently making her another promise, to always treasure her, and make sure she feels your adoration, a new determination to never let her go filling you, and suddenly the words you’ve wanted to say for so long are finally ready. “I love you,” You breathe out.

Joohyun beams, tightening her grip on you, and you yelp as she takes you by surprise, the older girl is shockingly strong as she lifts you into the air, twirling you for a brief second before placing you down, your body overwhelmed with affection. “I love you too” Joohyun murmurs, her expression pure bliss as she begins to repeatedly place feather-light kisses on random parts of your face, making you giggle.

She stops when she feels you reach to caress her cheek, and you watch her intently, her eyes practically glimmering while she leans into your hand with a soft sigh, and you can’t resist the urge to surge forward and press your lips against her, capturing them in such an intimate kiss that it makes you swoon, pouring all your love for her into it until you’re sure it’s tangible and you’re completely lost in everything that is her.

When you pull apart, Joohyun’s smile is wide, though you’re sure yours is wider, and you’re suddenly certain that loving Bae Joohyun is the easiest promise you’ve ever made.

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