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#it’s a shame it only lasted like half a movie
samwisefamgee · 5 months
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everyday I join lethal company lobby to Just Vibe and am sent Multiple Friend Request
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icharchivist · 2 years
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it’s funny when i was a teen i was not following mainstream stuff because i was deep into ~i’m not like the other teens~ (and just liked stuff that weren’t mainstream anyway) but nowadays my biggest argument to not follow mainstream is that we turned every big things into pure FOMO where if you don’t watch something big right away you will know everything about it in the couple of months that follow and it will suck any enjoyement out of it if you decide to watch it later and it’s honestly pretty depressing.
#and i don't mean like knowing vague spoilers#i'm going to watch the new Thor for a bonding activity#i don't really care about Marvel and skipped all of phase 3 and half of phase 2 and 4#but it became a bonding activity to watch the newest  movies even though i have very little interest#i figured i should at least watch the 3rd Thor that i skipped in case i needed it and all#and i remember reading some interesting takes about it#but it was legitimately depressing to just have the feeling i've seen every single thing in gifset#there was genuinely nothing that i thought 'oh i didnt see that before'#the movie is objectively okay with better themes and directing than most mcumovies#and i came out of it underwhelmed because i saw all of it before#and idk it's sad as hell#i've also been feeling it for like. TV shows i am just midly interested in that i'm forced to bing on release date#like holy shit this is not the type of emotional involvement i want with those shows they're not engaging enough for this#(at least to me personally it doesn't talk about quality because the stuff i love the most qualify as trashy)#and it genuinely annoys me that i have to pour the same energy into mainstream stuff i only slightly care about#than i would pour into stuff i truly love#like when the new S/tranger t/hing season came out at the same time i wanted to follow up the last update in one of my mobage#i'm mostly following mindlessly and i don't care enough about it esp not how ppl talk about it online#but i had to postpone something i really wanted to read bc i was already seeing major spoilers online#and i think it's a shame that a show based on suspense get its spoilers everywhere on day One#i've spent yeas fighting the edgelord in me always saying i didn't care about mainstream just because i don't 'care for normies'#but now i'm circling back to it on the account of 'it makes social media unbearable and makes it sounds like homework and it sucks'#so yeah pretty sad i'm becoming an edgelord again that's it#ichasalty#ichatalks
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upsidedownwithsteve · 5 months
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[2.1K] Steve Harrington x fem!reader 18+
The week following your night with Steve, you’d had absolutely no problem getting yourself off.
Every night, you lay in bed before sleep took over, your hand shoved down the front of your sleep shorts, fingers slipping clumsily and a little unpracticed over yourself, eyes clenched shut and lips parted silently as you thought about your best friend.
His digits were longer than yours, thicker, able to reach places you couldn’t, filling you up in a way you’d never felt before. But you could hear Steve’s voice in your ear as you swirled messy circles over your clit, chasing that throbbing feeling as you remembered his words.
“Has someone done that to you? Has someone put their mouth here?”
Cheek pressed to the pillow, pushing low whines into the cotton, legs spreading wider, knees hitched up as you fought to catch that feeling only Steve was able to give you before.
“Do you like it when I talk to you?”
He’d whispered it in your ear, breath warm against your cheek, hitching and gasping when you had tightened around him.
“My girl likes hearing dirty things, right? Like when I asked you if someone had gone down on you? If you’d had someone’s tongue here?”
Stomach tensing, the hook there tightening, skin too warm, the idea of your best friend laying between your thighs, your legs thrown over his shoulders too much for you to handle. Would he do it real soft for you? Would he lick over you like a man starved? Only breaking away to talk filth into your slick skin? Would he tell you how good you tasted, how sweet you were?
You came hard, back arching, a gasp leaving your lips, fingers moving until it was too much and you had to stop, sliding slick over your bare stomach as you relaxed back into the bed, butter on a hot day.
The next day, you vowed to ask Steve.
Just half a beer, that’s all it took. A few long drags, a movie that was never started, the tape half in the VCR and Steve’s bedroom lights low. Lingering looks, mussed sheets, anticipation heavy in the air like summer, a growing heat that settled on your skin and it fucking buzzed. It fizzed, it glittered.
“Did you really mean what you said?” You asked out the blue, pulling Steve from the TV set, leaning back on his pillows like you belonged there. “The other night, last week? About how it was a shame that no one had— no had ever… gone down on me.”
Steve stopped, the tape forgotten, his eyes wide as he looked at you over his shoulder. He watched the way your thighs rubbed together under your dress, a thin summery thing, delicate straps and material cut out of the sides, your skin on show between the buttercup yellow cotton. You watched him swallow, adam’s apple bobbing in his throat as his gaze got a little darker, the words he remembered telling you coming back to him.
“Shit, you look so damn pretty, you know that? I could do that for you though, if you wanted.”
Steve cleared his throat, rose up from when he’d been kneeling in front of the television, blurry static crackling, forgotten about. His knees bumped the edge of his bed as stood over you, breath hitching as he took you in, eyes trailing over bare legs and upupup until they settled on your mouth, the way you licked at your bottom lip nervously.
“Yeah,” he croaked, his voice already shot. You looked so pretty. He remembered what you looked like when you came, head thrown back against his shoulder, crying out his name in soft, heaving gasps. He hadn’t stopped thinking about it. “Yeah, yeah. I meant it.”
“Could put my mouth on you, let you know if you’re really as sweet as you look.”
“Have you been thinkin’ about it?” Steve asked, his voice sweet and soft. He smiled when you nodded, huffing out a breath like it was all too much. “Yeah? Fuck, sweetheart, so have I. Did you get yourself off, did you manage?”
He wanted to be filthier, he wanted to ask dirty, dirty questions. He wanted to know exactly what you thought about when you touched yourself. If you thought about him, if you got as wet as you had with him the week before. He wanted to know if you made the same noises in the quiet of your own room, if you whispered his name when you came.
Instead, Steve moved onto the bed, a little clumsy as the mattress dipped but he stayed by your feet, a hand reaching out to bravely curl around your ankle, your frill lined socks tickling his palm. One tug and he could spread your bent knees open for him, dragging you down his bed until your hair fanned over his pillows and he could push your thighs apart. Steve wondered if you’d let him.
Maybe he could find out.
You nodded, lips parted and already panting, barely able to form words. Steve’s thumb was circling over the skin of your ankle, slowly coasting upwards until his warm palm sat against your calf. He rubbed there too, fingers pushing at your skin like dough, all plush and soft and pliant for him. Your thighs parted, if just a little.
“Every night,” you whispered, eyes closing at his touch, the heated embarrassment creeping over your skin at your confession. You weren’t sure you were supposed to look your best friend in the eye when you told them you’d come on your own fingers, thinking about them. “Couldn’t help it, just- just needed to touch myself.”
You heard the boy groan, low and throaty, his hand climbing higher, laying on his side at your feet so you could feel his warm breath ghost over your shins. You let your legs fall apart again, inch by inch, eyes still closed until your feet slid across the sheets in opposite directions, knees parting. You felt Steve’s lips there, on the inside, at the sensitive skin, a barely there kiss.
“Did you come?”
You swore, breath hitching, nodding as you chewed on your bottom lip, hands coming up to press over your eyes, as if you could hide from him. Mortification was crawling over you, despite how Steve had had his fingers inside of you mere days before, how he’d watched you come, how he had a clear view of your spread thighs and the damp cotton clinging to your cunt, right now.
“Can I make you come again?” The boy sounded wrecked and the question made you open your eyes, gaze stuck on his like honey. “Please.”
You nodded, as if you’d ever say no to that. Like that wasn’t what you wanted.
You expected the boy to launch himself at you then, to grab and pull and kiss and nip. But as heavy as Steve’s gaze was, he moved slow, careful. His hands found your ankles again, one around each leg and he dragged them further apart, his eyes on yours. The static of the TV fizzed and outside the open bedroom window, you heard the Harrington’s sprinklers turn on.
“Lemme see,” Steve whispered, his tone that same sweet rasp as before. He nodded encouragingly when your hands found the hem of your dress, his smile soft, if not a little dirty. His chest was falling and rising faster and faster, his white t-shirt taught over his broad chest and shoulders. “There’s a good girl, fuck, honey.”
You flushed as you did as you were told, the hem of your sundress dragging up your thighs by your own hands. The material was still fisted between your fingers as you held it around your hips, legs spread obscenely, cotton underwear a cherry red, lace trimmed and with an obvious damp spot.
“Can I use my mouth?” Steve asked, murmuring, already moving between your knees, his stomach pressed to the bed. “Wanna taste you properly. Shit, can I do that? Please? Let me show you how good I can make you feel?”
You whined, high and needy, nodding enthusiastically as you sucked in a breath. “Fuck, can you? Please, Steve, I want that, god, I really want that, haven’t stopped thinking about it, imagining it, shit.”
You swore Steve’s eyes rolled at your words, his hands coming to curl around the back of your thighs, pulling you closer to him, nose pushing at where your hands lay over your stomach, still clutching your dress. He pressed a kiss there, lips grazing over the skin under your navel.
“You’re gonna be the death of me, you know that?”
You didn’t get a chance to reply before the boy was bringing his mouth down, open and pushing against your clothed cunt, tongue a hot, wet press over your folds, prodding gently until he found your clit between them. It was an instantaneous reaction, your body seizing up at the unfamiliar touch, an electric sensation, your body a livewire under Steve’s lips. He hushed you softly when you gave a weak cry, pushing at your inner thighs to keep you open for him.
He licked up your cunt, tongue dragging over the cotton, soaking it more and more until the fabric was clinging to the outline of you, until he could tease the tip of his nose over the spread of you, bumping against your clit. The noise your cunt made as he finally pulled your underwear from you was filthy, a wet sound that made his cock kick up in his jeans.
“Feel good?” Steve cooed, voice sticky with affection and awe for you. Your dress was rucked messily over your stomach, one strap sliding off your shoulder as he hooked your legs over his shoulders, bringing your bare cunt closer than before. Each word settled over your slick skin and made you twitch. “Nice, yeah? You gonna tell me, honey? Tell me how good I’m makin’ you feel, huh?”
“So good,” you breathed out, voice and words garbled between moans, your hands dropping from your stomach to clutch at the sheets on each side of you. But Steve wasn’t having any of that. He tsked, letting go of your legs only to coax your hands into his hair instead, hissing when you grabbed hard. “Fuck, Steve, please. More, please, feels so good, too good, I can’t, I--”
He wouldn’t have you begging, he wouldn’t dare. Steve wanted to give you everything you wanted, so he wasted no more time, surging forward the mere few inches it took to get his mouth back on you. Steve kissed over your cunt with the enthusiasm of a man who’d been starved of the one thing he wanted most. Lips pressed to you, tongue sneaking out to taste you, gathering up your slick only to press it to your clit. He hummed as you cried for him, eyes squeezing shut as you pulled on his hair, tugging him closer until his tongue was pushing into your entrance and his nose was nudging your clit.
He was shiny with you, mouth and chin wet and slick, eyes fluttering shut and rolling to the back of his head every time you gave his hair a good yank, your hips lifting to catch his tongue. He groaned, murmuring out pretty phrases like, ‘such a good girl’ and ‘so fuckin’ sweet for me.’
Steve lapped at you until you came, tongue soft but persistent, intent on you making you fall apart with just his mouth, groaning in want as he watched your entrance clench around nothing. He sucked and licked at your clit until you shattered, until you couldn’t take it any longer. Your back arched like last time, head thrown back into the pillows that smelled like him instead of against his shoulder, but Steve decided he liked this view just as much.
The boy tasted like you when you kissed him, half dragging him up your body as you panted, dress still messy around your waist, unabashed in your nakedness. Unlike the time before, Steve was miraculously still hard, desperate and aching under his jeans as he’d tried his best not to rut against the bed as he ate you out. Your palm grazed over his cock, smiled into his kiss when it twitched under your hand, his hips canting into your touch.
You only pulled away from his lips to press him onto the bed, switching your positions. Your dress fell back down, covering your sticky thighs and Steve was ready to protest, until you tucked your fingers around the button of his jeans and popped it open.
He let out a curse, breathing heavily, eyes half lidded and watching you. You quirked a brow, asking a silent question you were pretty sure you knew the answer to - this wasn’t a case of a friend helping a friend, not anymore.
You waited. Steve nodded.
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angelltheninth · 11 months
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Can I ask for a make-out session with the genshin boys until you're interrupted by your kids knocking on your bedroom door asking if they can sleep with you two? Something fluffy and... a little NSFW maybe? Love your writing.
xoxo<3
Oh lol, that's such a movie thing to do.
Pairing: Kaeya, Diluc, Itto, Thoma, Childe, Pantalone, Dottore, Tighnari, Zhongli x Fem!Reader
Tags: fluff, slightly suggestive, making out, interruptions, cuddles, new relationship, Reader has a kid
A/N: Sorry for the lack of content lately, turns out I needed a rest from my vacation lol.
Kaeya doesn't mind being with a woman who has a kid he gets to tell them all his stories. But when he's with you, when his hands are on you and he's half naked and needs you its a different story. He will still greet your kid with a smile but ask them to wait a few minutes, then he'll tell them another exciting story.
Diluc loves your kid but can't deny that he feels awkward around them sometimes. Especially when they catch the two of you in a compromising position on the couch, his hands drifting up your bare legs and his lips kn your neck. Just kill him now. He would honestly run and hide but you're laughing so the situation must not be that bad.
Itto can't explain why the kids love him so much, your kid most of all. Maybe cause he lets them climb all over him and plays so many games with his endless stamina? There are better ways for him to put that stamina to use. Having you on your back his pants nearly down his legs, that's much better. The knocking and the small voice is like cold ice to him and he almost growls but composes himself enough when you go and open the door, picking your kid up and bringing them over, giggling away.
Thoma doesn't know where to hide when your kid knocks at the door. He needs to explain how he's in your room. Usually he always says hi to your kid when he's in the house. And why doues he have your lipstick all over his lips? Uh... he thinks your mom looks real pretty with it, so he wanted to try too. Yeah... he dropped it so now its down his abs too, how embaressing. Let him wash up, stop laughing at him and then your kid can come in and sleep between you two.
Childe kisses you like its his last day to do so. So of course when its interrupted he'll feel really grumpy about it. When he sees your kid is at the door he softens up a little but he pouts almost the same way when your kid doesn't think he can sleel over with you two. He can but then you have to give your boyfriend extra attention later.
Pantalone has an icy calm demenor when he opens the door for your kid. He's not angy exactly, he wants them to explain. But of course you're the one babying them and picking them up immedietly so they don't cry. Its sweet zo see but one of these days you'll have to toughen up on them you know? Oh whatever, he can't say no to both of you giving him that puppydog look.
Dottore was almost between your legs when the knocking scared you enough to almost knee him in the face. Thankfully he's faster then that, grabbing your ankle in warning. He thought you had the place all to yourselves tonight. A shame he was going to reward you for being good for him today. Looks like its gonna have to wait, after all, kids take priority right? Thst's what you always tell him.
Tighnari almost books it out the window, only stopped by you grabbing his tail. He doesn't have to hide, your kid loves him, loves how cute he looks. He does not look cute, but... fine for your kid he'll stay. As soon as he picks them up they go for his ears, tugging at them but not hard enough to hurt. It's fine he... he doesn't mind, strangely enough.
Zhongli hears your kid walking towards the door and sits up to wipe his mouth before the knocking comes. You need a little bit to get dressed, the knocking getting louder before you open the door and ask what's wrong. Oh. Zhongli is already hugging you, offering his hand to the kid with a gentle smile. Let them sleep over if they want. He has all the time in the world for you two.
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azsazz · 2 months
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Midnight Muse (Part 21)
Azriel x Reader [Art School AU]
Summary: You and your best friend Feyre have just moved into a new apartment for your sophomore year of college at art school. What you didn't know when you signed the lease is that you'd be living next to three rowdy boys.
Warnings: N/A
Word Count: 3,850
[Part 1] [Part 2] [Part 3] [Part 4] [Part 5] [Part 6] [Part 7] [Part 8] [Part 9] [Part 10] [Part 11] [Part 12] [Part 13] [Part 14] [Part 15] [Part 16] [Part 17] [Part 18] [Part 19] [Part 20] [Masterlist]
_________________________________________
You haven’t spoken to Azriel since the morning you woke up in his bed alone.
Which, granted, has only been one day.  
You’d spent the rest of your Sunday confused, rerunning the previous night over and over and over again until your head hurt with it. You thought that you and Azriel had started anew, if the passionate sex you’d shared the night before was anything to go by. But when you woke, the sheets beside you hadn’t even been warm and the note he’d left you seemed scrawled in haste, like he’d barely had the courtesy to do so on his way out the door.
Something important came up, I’m sorry. I’ll explain later. Please don’t be mad, princess. I’m coming back to you. —Az
He’d left his number but you’d left the comfort of his bed, slipping back into your dress and collecting your things before doing the ultimate walk of shame next door. Really, it’s much worse than the last time you’d snuck out of his apartment. You’d been hungover then, caring mostly about not throwing up in the hall or waking Azriel, but by the silence of the apartment as you made your way out, there was no need for you to be quiet.
It left you only with the aching between your thighs and the mottled bruises painting your skin purple.
That night was better than a dream. You would’ve never thought that you and Azriel could work past the lingering feud you’d started the year with, and you hadn’t realized how draining your constant grudge had been. It turns out that getting over yourself and under him had been the best thing that could’ve happened for your relationship.
His touch burns your skin long after you’ve showered him off. You can still feel him between your legs, fingers dug into the meat of your thighs as he held you still for his taking. The feeling of his lips, his tongue brushing yours, everything that he’d done to you last night, clinging to your very being as if he’d tattooed himself across every inch of your skin.
Maybe you should’ve listened to his note. You could have easily stayed in his bed all day, with how comfortable it is, but as the minutes trickled by, the paranoia set in, eating at you until you’d had to flee.
Feyre hadn’t asked any questions when you slipped into her room after your shower. She’d welcomed you with open arms, a sad look in her eyes as if she knew exactly what happened. And maybe she did; maybe she heard you like you heard her, but you hadn’t cared, only snuggled up to your best friend's side as she put a movie on her laptop for the both of you to watch.
She knew you would tell her in good time.
It hadn’t stopped Azriel from blowing up your phone. He must’ve stolen your number from Rhsyand or Cassian, or perhaps he even told them what happened because message after message after message lit up your notifications, pleading for you to answer your phone like an incessant alarm.
Princess…it’s Az. Where did you go?
Do you want some waffles? There might still be some ice cream left before Cassian finishes it all, but with the spoon he’s found, it won’t last long.
Can I please explain? 
And finally: 
I can hear your phone buzzing through the wall. Please answer me.
You hadn’t replied to those, nor any of the ones that followed. You half expected him to come knocking at your door, but Feyre had noticed your poor mood and told Rhys that the two of you were having a girl’s day and not to bother either of you.
You could’ve both kissed and been upset with her for that.
You wanted that explanation from Azriel, but you also wanted him to fight for it. Let him come knocking, let him ask you in person to explain. Who finally gets the girl and leaves her to wake up alone? Especially after all of the things Azriel had admitted to you…
Monday morning is much the same. You’d successfully avoided seeing Azriel on your way to campus, and as much as you tried focusing on your drawing course, none of the shapes you were drawing turned into anything great.
You’d expected it to be bliss, to get your mind off of every little nitpicky thing you keep thinking about from that night. Feyre and Lucien’s presence helped some, but when the class quieted  down for a drawing exercise and you were left alone with your thoughts once again, they naturally drifted back to yesterday morning. Maybe you had misread Azriel’s intentions and he was only looking for a one night stand. You did make the first move, afterall. 
It was all a jumbled mess in your head that could only make sense if Azriel explained it. And now you’re once again thinking that you should have stayed…or at least texted him back.
“You okay, (Y/N)?” Lucien asks, startling you from your thoughts. The tip of your charcoal cracks against your drawing pad and you frown, staring at the black chalky marks on your fingers. You frown, shoving the immediate thought of Azriel from your head and tilt your head up to meet Lucien’s concerned gaze.
You offer him a forced smile. “Yeah, sorry, I was zoning out a bit. I’m fine.” You hadn’t realized that class ended and everyone is packing up their things. Feyre’s over by the drawers, stowing her pad in the one you share. Lucien doesn’t look like he believes you, but he stays silent while you hastily pack your supplies away, grimacing at the drawing you’d been working on. 
You don’t check your phone. You’d already woken up to multiple messages from Azriel this morning, asking to walk you to class and explain. Luckily, you hadn’t run into him on your way out the door, tearing down the staircase with a confused Feyre trying to keep up.
Lucien and Feyre are talking about where you should all head to lunch when the three of you leave the building. Alis had announced another assignment, and the premise already hangs heavy on your shoulders. The instructions were left loose enough that you have once again no idea what you’re going to draw for it. It’s infuriating, how everyone else just seems to know immediately what they’re wanting to create when it takes you weeks to figure it out, and then when you do, you’re changing your mind again and again, worried that nothing is good enough.
You run smack into Lucien’s back while you’re lost in your thoughts. Your friends are three steps out the door and your nose stings from where you’d hit it against your friend. Lucien hardly even seems to notice, his mouth set in a straight line and he and Feyre stare directly ahead. 
At Azriel, who’s leaning up against the railing. He looks so nervous it’s almost as if he doesn’t even go to this school; doesn’t walk into the same buildings or around the same campus. His thumb is tucked into the strap of his backpack slung over his shoulder, and the other is stuffed into the pocket of his leather jacket. His black hair is tousled but not from the wind, from the amount of times he’s nervously run his fingers through it.
You watch his golden eyes flick over Feyre and Lucien, darkening as they rove over your copper haired friend while you step out from behind him. He instantly finds your gaze and they soften, and then he’s pushing off from the railing and making his way towards you. Your face heats because this is the last place you thought Azriel would corner you. In public.
“Hey, Azriel,” Feyre greets, glancing over at you. You shake your head softly but keep your gaze pinned to Azriel who strides closer like he no longer has a care in the world. It’s a front and you know it.
Azriel nods politely, but he doesn’t break your stare. “(Y/N), can we talk for a minute?”
You feel Feyre’s confused blue eyes burning into your skin. The way that she slides her phone from her pocket like she’s trying not to make any sudden movements is not missed by you nor Azriel, but neither of you seem to care that she’s seconds away from messaging Rhys about this. You wonder if he knows, if Azriel had admitted anything to his roommates about you, about the night you shared together. 
Lucien is tense, shoulders coiled tight. He’s almost glaring at Azriel but it doesn’t faze the onyx haired boy in the least, like he’s a speck of dust on his shoulder. Nothing can deter Azriel, of this you know. Somehow, he’s just as stubborn as you are, and the soft look in his eyes, pleading with you, makes your stomach twist.
“Sure,” you find yourself agreeing. You turn to your friend so you don’t have to witness the relief on his face. “I’ll catch up with you guys later. And I’ll see you in Art History, Fey.”
“You better,” your best friend mutters, already tapping away at her phone. She drags Lucien by the sleeve because he doesn’t seem inclined to leave you alone with Azriel despite you agreeing to speak with him. Azriel looks like he’s going to bare his teeth at the boy. “Come on, Luc.”
You start down the stairs of the building, going the opposite direction from your friends. You can feel Lucein’s sun and moon eyes on you as you walk, but you don’t turn around to look. 
Azriel catches up to you in two great strides. You don’t know where you’re going, fine with waltzing around campus while you talk. You might need to text Feyre to bring you something to eat during class, because you’re getting hungry for lunch.
“I don’t like him,” Azriel mutters, and you can tell by the tight grip he has on the straps of his backpack.
“I don’t think you like anyone,” you respond, not unkindly, but it’s not a friendly remark either. It’s strange almost, to be seen with him in public not only after your public feud, but the night you’d spent together as well. It feels like a dirty little secret has come to light, and you don’t like it.
Azriel glances at you sidelong, but you refuse to meet his gaze. “I like you.”
You snort because he doesn’t even know you, not really. “You didn’t even like me two days ago, Azriel,” you start but he’s already shaking his head in disagreement, denying your accusations. “And with the way you up and left me in your room, I’m thinking there’s still a possibility that you don’t even like me now.”
He stops you with a gentle hand on your elbow, turning you to face him. You stumble at the suddenness of the move and it puts you a step closer to him than you’d like. His grip on your arm isn’t firm or demanding, it’s a soft caress that matches the pleading look in his honeyed eyes.
“Please,” he murmurs, and you can see just how much your avoidance has been bothering him. His fingers tremble along your arms and when you look down at them he pulls away, nervously tucking them into the pocket of his hoodie. It makes something in your chest crack a little. “I can explain.”
“Explain, then,” you answer simply.
Azriel shifts on his feet, glancing around. There are students milling about and you should probably keep walking or at least move out of the way, lest the both of you get mowed down by someone late to class or a biker. “Here?” 
You quirk a brow.
He sighs a little, exasperated. “Can I take you somewhere? How about lunch?” 
You study him. It’s clear that he wants to explain to you, and he looks just as stressed out about the situation as you are. And you really do want to hear what he has to say for himself, if his reason for leaving you is forgivable…
“Fine,” you relent, and his shoulders drop a notch. “But I have class this afternoon and I can’t be late.”
⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽༓☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅
Rita’s is the kind of place that you walk past and don’t go in. 
The outside is a smidge better than decrepit, with its peeling paint and uneven sidewalk. There’s graffiti on the side of the building, tags you can hardly ready with how curvy and obnoxious the letters look. One of the windows has a shade, but it’s hanging by a thread and looks more like a hazard than not, and the rest of the windows are bare, sunlight pouring into the yellowing casement. You wouldn’t even know the place is open with its rusted neon sign so broken and sad. 
But Azriel guides you in through the door with a hand on the small of your back and you blame the shiver that travels up your spine on the blast of cold air that hits you in the face when you step over the threshold.
Maybe you’ve been a little harsh on its exterior appearance because the inside is tidy. The air smells like greasy burgers and crunchy fries, and there’s a shiny jukebox in the corner playing an oldies song you think you’ve heard at one of Cassian’s parties once. Well, you heard it through the wall when the entirety of said party belted it at the top of their lungs and not even your headphones could block out the noise.
There’s an older man sitting at the counter and a girl who looks to be about your age behind the counter. She’s smacking her gum and doodling on her order pad, a half abandoned milkshake melting in the red cup beside her. She doesn’t even look up when Azriel leads you towards a booth, and you slide in opposite him with furrowed brows.
“What’s wrong?” He asks you, nervousness flicking through his eyes. He hesitates to sit down, awaiting your response.
“Nothing,” you assure him with a soft smile you don’t feel is genuine. “I didn’t even know this place was here, really.”
Azriel all but slumps onto the electric blue seat, eyes sparkling with delight. Your heart rate picks up at the sight of the little grin he offers you. It’s nice to see this side of him, happy and relaxed, in his element. 
You wonder how he looks when he’s concentrated on a drawing, or a tattoo.
He’s got them covered up with his leather jacket today, though the tips of those coiling shadows around his collar bones peek out from the neckline of his black t-shirt and you think about how much you were coiled around each other the other night, skin to skin.
Your cheeks heat with the memory, and you look down at your lap.
“It’s great,” Azriel explains, slipping out of his jacket. You wish you had paid more attention to the artwork marking his skin the night you spent together but there hadn’t been much time to with the way you were all over each other, and he wasn’t around when you woke up. “Been coming here since freshman year.” 
You’re about to respond when the waitress you’d seen arrives, slapping two menu’s down on the funky patterned table. You startle with the motion and shift uncomfortably when Azriel all but glares at the girl. She doesn’t seem to care though, flipping her stark white hair over her shoulder with a sneer.
Her brown eyes flit over you like you’re a piece of her chewed gum stuck under the table, then leans her hip against the edge of the table, flipping her order pad open. “I already know what you want,” he says haughtily to Azriel, and then those piercing brown eyes are on you, pinning you to your seat like it’s a trap from Saw. “What will you be having?” 
“I, um, I’m not sure yet,” you stutter awkwardly, because you’re confused. Who is this and why is Azriel acting like this is normal? “I need to look at the menu.” 
She rolls her eyes and the silence that ensues makes your face grow hot, sweat bead at your hairline. She crosses her arms over her chest, popping a bubble with her gum, and it’s as if she’s waiting for you to look at the menu and decide right now. You send a pleading look to Azriel whose jaw is ticking with annoyance.
“Give us a minute, will you, Cresseida? And let Rita know I’m here. Thanks.” 
With another eye roll and an annoyed “Whatever,” Cresseida all but stomps away from your table. Your eyes trail her until she’s around the counter and pushing through the swinging doors to the kitchen.
“She seems…lovely,” you mutter, fingering the corner of the menu where it’s bent. “Seems like the kind of place you would’ve taken me when we didn’t like each other,” you tack on, squinting at the small font. Why are there so many items on the menu?
“I’m sorry about her,” Azriel blurts, and you think this is the first time you’ve ever seen him blush. It’s unfairly adorable. He offers you a hand, face up, and you can’t resist that look in his eyes, how he’s offering you his scarred hand instead of hiding it. With a short huff, you place your palm on his and he immediately intertwines your fingers, holding tight. It makes you blush. “She’s always been cranky,” he peers over his shoulder like she might be standing right behind him. “I promise, Rita is much nicer.”
You give him a forced smile because honestly, you’re not sure what else to say to that. You’re not even sure you’re all that hungry anymore, with Cresseida’s off putting attitude and the nerves that are gnawing on your stomach from the talk you’re about to have with Azriel.
You busy yourself with looking at the menu. There are way too many options and not enough time to decide because a short, stocky woman is trapezing her way around the countertop and towards your table, her eyes glowing with joy.
“Azriel, what brings you back so soon? Oh—and who is this lovely lady?” Her eyes fall across your intertwined fingers and she fails to stifle the beaming grin that appears on her red lips. You can tell that she’s a gem by appearance alone, but also in the way that she looks at Azriel, like he’s the son she’s never had. You can’t help but to smile at her. Her round face is flush with a permanent blush and she looks like the kind of woman you’d love to hug.
“Rita, this is (Y/N). (Y/N), this is Rita, the owner of Rita’s Diner.”
“Very nice to meet you,” you greet eagerly, trying to pull your hand away from Azriel’s to shake her hand. He doesn’t let go, and smirks at the glare you shoot his way.
“(Y/N) as in…” Rita trails off, flicking a glance at Azriel. You narrow your eyes at him, curious as to what he’s told her about you. She continues, “As in your girlfriend, Azriel?”
You almost splutter, cheeks going red hot at her insinuation.
Azriel doesn’t seem fazed in the slightest, admiring the color to your cheeks and the shock in your eyes. “Not yet.”
Not yet. 
But maybe soon, when he finally explains himself.
Rita winks at him and you really want to bury your face in the menu right now.
“What can I get for you, darlin’?” Rita asks, her voice sweet as cherry pie.
“I don’t know, there are so many options…” you trail off, sending a pleading look towards Azriel. “Almost too many to choose from.”
Rita’s chest swells with pride and Azriel snickers.
“Cass prefers the pancakes,” he supplies, “But I think the waffles are better.”
“Pancakes, it is,” you beam, handing Rita back the menu. Azriel glares playfully and Rita seems positively overjoyed as she makes her way back to the kitchen.
Your smiles fade with Rita’s cheerful attitude and it’s all too soon that you’re aware you’re holding Azriel’s hand and he still hasn’t explained. You look at him and he’s already sighing. There are dark circles under his eyes that you hadn’t noticed before, and you can tell that he hadn’t slept well last night either.
Azriel strokes a thumb across your knuckles and your tense shoulders ease a bit. The embarrassment you’d felt when you woken up alone in his bed has simmered with his eagerness to explain to you what happened that morning, but you’re still feeling a bit tender about it, especially when you see the pained look on Azriel’s face.
Whatever had happened hadn’t been good.
And you feel like a fool when he answers your question lingering between the both of you. 
“The reason I wasn’t there that morning was because my father was in town. He came to see me.” 
You try to swallow back the sudden rage boiling up from your stomach. The man who’d let his step-sons burn Azriel’s hands. The one who doesn’t want him to follow his dreams, his passions, when he clearly has the skill to do something amazing with them. The one who didn’t even visit him that night of the incident.
You squeeze his hand and Azriel seems to relax, understanding your forgiveness. Your throat is still tight when you respond, forcing the word out. “Okay…”
It gives him room to continue, even though Azriel looks like he’d rather face Cresseida’s wrath again.
“He found interest in purchasing and renovating our apartment building.” 
You blink, not sure you’ve heard him correctly. “What?” You tack on, defensively. “Why?”
Azriel shrugs. To keep me in fucking check. He sighs as if the tremendous weight on his shoulders is two seconds away from crushing him completely. You don’t like that frown on his face and you don’t like his father.
“He thinks it’s a good investment opportunity, I guess.”
You don’t like the sound of this one bit, and Azriel agrees with you.
“And if he does buy it?”
Azriel shakes his head sadly, “No more neighbors.” 
You didn’t think the thought of not being his next door neighbor would hit you so hard. Your chest aches with the idea of it, no longer sharing a wall. Even though you despised it at the beginning, you’ve gotten used to and even like the fact that you share a wall now.
Rita comes back and sets a plate of hot pancakes in front of you and a stack of blueberry waffles in front of Azriel. Everything smells delicious and your mouth waters at the sight of the thick pat of butter melting its way across the top of your breakfast.
She places a milkshake between you and Azriel, and there’s no missing the two neon colored straws sticking out of the top. You blush, thanking her.
She winks in response. “Enjoy, you two.”
⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽༓☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅
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jaylver · 2 months
Text
ROCKLAND — P.SH
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synopsis: almost like a nightmare, park sunghoon plagues your present just as much as your past regrets had done. however, this time around, you and him decided to right your wrongs one last time.
pairings: non-idol!sunghoon x afab!reader
genre: exes to lovers, miscommunications, angst, second chance romance
warning(s): profanities, brief mentions of smoking, drinking, partying and alcohol
wc: 8k
a/n: i'm BACK. this has been in the works for far too long because of the constant writer's block so i'm not sure if it's good or not, plus it's my first exes to lovers so please be nice <3 greatly inspired by gracie abram's "rockland", so do give it a listen too! please leave a feedback and reblogs are greatly appreciated! muah xx
masterlist | © jaylver all rights reserved.
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If there was one thing you’d regret forever in this lifetime, it would be ending things with the love of your life.
You admit it, you’re selfish. Selfish for wanting to leave the town you grew to hate, selfish for prioritising yourself and chasing your dreams, choosing to leave the people you loved instead. Painted a villain in the eyes of many close to the person you once went home to and even the man himself. But, how could he fully blame you when he was equally selfish too?
Park Sunghoon thought keeping you in the cage of this small town was going to make him a happy man. He often fantasised about the possibility of you and his future together, completely pushing aside the thought of you leaving, until it actually happened.
He was angry. He let himself be consumed by his own feelings and mindlessly projecting his anger and blame on you, while you regretfully did the same.
Pools of tears and venomous words spewed out of impulse left you scarred and broken down. It was a bad ending that you’d see in movies coming to life. The moment you had everything packed and goodbyes said, you figured leaving was for the best, now that your ex hates you and his friends who probably felt the same. 
It was a shame, though. Heading to somewhere far from home with a heavy heart knowing you didn’t have the chance to see him once more. Frankly, you were a coward, and so was he.
That explained why returning back home was the scariest thing you had to face in a while. 
It was ironic, wasn't it? Coming back to the place you wished for years to escape and actually doing so, but eventually having to return after you dropped out of the college that you've been praying and praying to get into, only for it to be overwhelming and the city lights couldn't compare to the starry night of your hometown.
You suppose you got the thing you wanted, but it just wasn't what you imagined.
Freshly twenty-two and out of school, you figured home was what you needed in your next step before deciding if you should re enrol. However, you find yourself not having the guts to face your family and friends, not after the promises turned out to be empty. 
"You should quit smoking," 
Yunjin, your cousin and practically your closest friend growing up, was just a distance away when you spotted her, leaning against her car with a cigarette in hand. You found it amusing how she didn't cave into vapes instead in this day and age. 
"Y/N!" She pushed the bud of her half smoked cigarette into the wall, then started jogging towards you, her dress flowing in the wind and boots making obnoxious clicks against the ground. There was a sense of relief in her eyes, her usual smile that you missed graced your presence. "God, I missed you, things aren't the same without you here,"
In the span of a few seconds of her hug, you took the chance to digest her words. Did that mean the traditions you've upheld are now gone? Parties, trips to the beach, all those? 
"What?"
Yunjin pulled away, still managing a small smile. "I don't think things were ever the same since you left … and after you broke up with Sunghoon,"
You blinked, looking away into the distance. "I don't think I'll be welcomed,"
Yunjin scoffed, slapping your arm and scurrying to get your bags. "Don't say that! So not true. Everyone in the family is waiting for you to be back—"
"And talk behind my back about my failure in graduating? Yeah, no,"
‘‘That’s not going to happen,” Yunjin sighed, struggling with your bags and declining your help, but you still forcefully grabbed some knowing she’d eventually crumble. “I think they’ll get it,”
Would they?
Once you are settled into the car, bags successfully loaded into the trunk, you let yourself melt into the comforts of Yunjin’s passenger seat, finally getting to close your eyes and drift away. You thought it was best before having to face everything and everyone once again.
“What’s your plan now, anyway?”
Without opening your eyes, you envisioned a distant image in your head. “Take my time off and see if I’d like to re enrol or not. If I don’t, I’ll just go plan B,”
“Which is?”
“Accept the job offer in London,”
Yunjin almost hit the brakes out of shock, the news that came from you felt like it had hit her in the face, but somehow, she managed to keep her cool and not get you both killed. “What?” she shrieked.
“What?” you questioned back, sounding nonchalant as if this was just another normal offer that didn’t seem particularly significant. But it was.
“You have a job offer in London and you’re coming back here,”
“I left the city for a reason, it’d be stupid to go to another one right after,”
Yunjin exhaled, blinking in stupor. “Right,”
“How’s … everyone?”
Yunjin knew you weren’t referring to your family. Of course you’d know how your own family was doing, that’s a no brainer. What you were trying to mean was your old friend group. You couldn’t blame them for being mad at you, after all you were only a part of it because of Sunghoon.
“Heeseung’s graduating soon,” this was the first update you’ve gotten from Yunjin after those years away. It took you every will not to ask her about them, but here you were now, finally giving in. “They’re still the same, nothing’s changed,”
“What about him?”
Yunjin seemed hesitant, obviously holding back something that she didn’t want you to know. “I’m not going to explode upon hearing, you know that, right?” you joked lightheartedly, but secretly dreading hearing about him.
“I think he’s seeing someone,”
“Good for him,” 
Would it be a crime to admit that you still missed your ex? Something in you was wishing you could rekindle a connection again now that you’re back, but all that hope shattered. If he had already moved on, why couldn’t you? Even after knowing how he probably hated and resented you for doing what you did, you still couldn’t bring yourself to hate him back. 
“That’s all?”
“You want me to go full crazy ex mode? You’re insane,” you shook your head, smiling a little, hoping Yunjin didn’t notice the speck of sadness swimming in your irises. “Whoever she is, I’m sure that I would like her … if I were slightly nicer,”
She let out a ‘tch’ in response, though grinning. “What are you going to do with them around? There’s no way you’d be able to fully avoid them,”
“What can I do? I’ll just have to coexist.”
Coexist was a funny word. How were you able to do that when you couldn’t even fully get over Sunghoon in the first place? Thinking about meeting him in flesh already made you feel like doubling over and projectile vomit. That was how pathetic you were, what a shame. 
Settling in was easy. It was natural to be back home, way better than being in the noisy city and constantly surrounded by a bunch of fake friends. The question of why you left in the first place started burning your mind as you tossed around trying to sleep, but it only persisted to bug you. Then came the thoughts of Sunghoon and the friends you left behind, which prompted you to be fully awake, sitting up in bed.
It wasn't the greatest idea to reach for your phone and search for his contact name, just to recall the day you deleted his number. Yet, your memory never failed you, remembering the digits like it was first instinct, fingers already typing his number. Your thumb hovered over the green call button, a haze in your mind.
Inevitably, you shut your phone and dug your head into your pillow. He would've laughed then, if he had seen this happen, the exact moment of you almost caving in and finally saying the sorry you never gave him.
The pictures you saw of him on social media here and there made you wonder how he was and if he had already forgotten about you. There were a few recurring appearances of a girl that seemed to linger by his side in group pictures that caught your eyes. Who took your bed when you left? Who laughed at everything that he said? Was it that girl?
Just like the time you first had a crush on Sunghoon, you stayed awake thinking about him, except this time around, you were filled with regret instead of hope. 
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"Heeseung asked me about you,"
Yunjin's random confession in the middle of the day had surprised you. Lee Heeseung, the best friend of your ex who you swore hated your guts, asked about you? Shocker.
"What did you say?"
"I said something along the lines of you figuring out life and just chilling here until the time comes," Yunjin shrugged, and you nodded slowly. "But there's something he said that made me a bit … confused?"
"What?"
"He said they wanted to see you again," 
You raised your eyebrows, a hint of scepticism flashed over your eyes. "They want to see me? Tell me a better joke next time, thanks,"
"I'm not joking! I mean, he did say excluding Sunghoon, but the other guys wanted to know how you were now that you're back," Yunjin winced a little at the mention of your ex, but you waved it off.
"Are they treating me to dinner or something?"
"Well … no. But Heeseung asked me to bring you to their next party, which is in a few days," Yunjin's gaze softened, hand patting your back. "You know you don't have to come if you don't want to. I mean, after all that happened with you and them and Sunghoon,"
You let out a small sigh, absentmindedly fidgeting your fingers. "It's all in the past now. I'm sure Sunghoon has moved on with another girl, and maybe—just maybe—the guys do hate me less."
You never went to that party Yunjin mentioned.
It was hard to admit but you knew, deep inside you, you were afraid, too cowardly to face the people you once knew. Instead, you chose to linger around like a lost soul in a town full of the ghosts of your past. 
It didn't help that the party was also in Sunghoon's house. How did they expect you to go in the first place? You thought you'd never step foot in there after you broke it off with him, and you were adamant on keeping it that way, but your heart got the worst of you.
On the night of the party, you drove around the neighbourhood, eventually stopping across the street of his house. You didn't know what got to you to do so, but you guessed reminiscence and bright lights coming from the house were the reason. The music was loud, people were coming in and out of the house, and the only thing you could think of was him.
That thought alone was enough to have you drive away, leaving the house further and further away into the background just as the memories of him being pushed into the back of your mind.
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Rotting in your bed wasn't how your early 20s were meant to be spent, and avoiding almost everyone most definitely wasn't the case either.
Your family and Yunjin were the only people you saw daily, as for the friends you once had, they were long forgotten or didn't even bother to reach out. Except for Heeseung and the others.
That, to you, was a really funny thing to think about. People who stuck by you after the break up and swore to be your closest friends didn't try contacting you once you moved back, knowing damn well word traveled fast in the town; whereas the friends you thought hated you were the first to reach out.
"I'll go to that party," you said to Yunjin on a sunny afternoon tanning session by the pool, sunglasses sitting on the bridge of your nose, hiding the apprehension in your eyes.
"Really?" Yunjin almost jumped out of her seat. It was a party she had brought up days ago, still persistent on taking you out. At least this time around, it wasn't in Sunghoon's house, but her friend Chaewon's. "That's great! Chaewon and the girls are super nice, you'll love them. Let's pick a nice outfit for you, okay?"
Yunjin was by far the most enthusiastic one between you and her. She was picking out dresses and tops, literally rummaging through your closet for anything, and you had to remind her it was just a college party. So, you settled for a skirt and a plain top. 
"Will you be okay? I'll stick by you," Yunjin had her arms around you, standing by the front door of Chaewon's house, hearing the music blaring from the inside.
"I'm fine—I think I'll be fine—I just don't want to run away from everyone anymore," it was mostly true, you thought it was inevitable to hide all the time, that wasn't how you're going to spend your life living.
"If there's anything, tell me, okay? We'll leave if you're getting sick," Yunjin gave your arm a final squeeze of assurance before crossing the threshold. 
It was the same as every party you've gone to. Loud music, drunk college kids, liquor and beers strayed around, it reeked of your nightmare in a nutshell there. 
Yunjin's friends were all as lovely as she had promised. The host herself was wobbling on her feet but managed to grace you with her humour. There was Sakura and Kazuha that you learned were foreign students. 
Throughout the night, you were stuck by Yunjin, going from circle to circle and introducing yourself or recognising some of your past school mates. But, almost inevitably so, Heeseung, Jay and Jake had made an appearance too.
"Y/N," Jay was the first to call your name, causing you to turn your head at the familiar voice. 
Your thoughts during then were jumbled into a mess. The people you were fighting to avoid were standing in front of you, all of which were much different than the memories you had of them in mind. 
Three of them had grown taller, gained some muscles and matured in many ways. Jay's hair was dyed pink, Heeseung got new piercings and Jake had a tattoo on his finger. It was strange to admit they're the same people you knew despite feeling the complete opposite of familiarity.
"Hey—" you were cut off by Jay closing in and pulling you into a hug, this for once was something you remembered about him.
"We're so glad you're back," he whispered into your hair, squeezing you tight. It reminded you then that you were friends with him and the guys before you even dated Sunghoon, that connection was deeper than it seemed, and for it to be severed just because of a breakup was gut wrenching to realise. "We're sorry, Y/N, we're so sorry,"
His apology was genuine, that's for sure. Once you pull away, you let both Heeseung and Jake take turns to hug you, whispering apologies into your ear. It was odd, to accept their apologies and having to start afresh. You held onto them, just taking it in. To forgive was a big step, but maybe it was your first step.
You sat there, catching up with them and slowly getting comfortable just like the old days. Heeseung graduated and got a good job offer, Jay and Jake were still studying, both of which were in the same university. You were relieved there was nothing too awkward between you and them, or else you would have regretted your choices.
The night continued on with a few small talks and eventually you had to excuse yourself to the toilet. You wondered how Chaewon's house was so big, with halls that seemed to never end, or it could just be the effects of alcohol.
Stumbling around, you held onto the walls, passing by rooms occupied by people probably doing something unspeakable. You thought your peace of mind would be intact until the end of the night, but you were wrong. Upon turning a corner, you froze.
It was Sunghoon. It was him.
Grief was a funny feeling, especially when it comes to someone you once knew. You stared at him and there he was, like a ghost from your past coming back to haunt you. He was the shell of the person you loved, and you couldn't help but grieve the person he once was. What was he like now? 
Before you could even turn around and make a run for it, his wandering eyes landed on you. He had the same thought process as you. Realisation, panic, sadness, confusion all mixed into a heap of feelings. 
Your feet started moving on its own, as you stepped back, he took a step forward. Your breath became ragged, heart thumping hard and blood pumping in your ears. He was nearing, and you were running away, it was the same as before.
"Y/N!" He called out, and all it took was him to say your name again to have you stop in your tracks. Gosh, you were pathetic.
He was standing before you now, closer than he was a moment ago. It was then you realised how much he had changed too. 
He was taller, smile lines etched much deeper into his face, almost changing along the same wavelengths with the others. There was something different about the way he looked at you, however. From love in his eyes that eventually changed into hatred was now filled with longing and confusion.
"Y/N," he repeated, disbelief evident in his voice, as if he couldn't believe you were there. 
"Sunghoon," you blinked, a frown unknowingly making its way to your face. You let a few beats of silence pass, conflicted and nervous. "I—I should leave,"
"No—!" his hand reached out for you, but you didn't feel his touch. He didn't dare to touch you, letting his hand linger before pulling it back to his side. "I mean, you don't have to leave,"
"I thought you hate me,"
Sunghoon's gaze fell to the floor, jaw clenched and eyebrows furrowed. He met your eyes once more. "I should hate you, shouldn't I? But I don't think I do, I never did,"
You blinked, a little surprised, a little hurt. All along he had made you think he hated your guts but he actually didn't? "Oh," you seemed to have lost the ability to talk or to compute a proper sentence.
You thought of the things you wanted to ask him. If he was still angry at you or if things were working for him. But, what came out was the question you've stored in the back of your mind instead.
"Are you with someone new?"
You figured he didn't expect such a question from you, much as you didn't expect yourself saying it. It was an itching thought, one that made you look like a typical ex, but you couldn't help it.
"I'm not," he sounded almost exasperated, as if having to squash down this rumour for the thousandth time.
"Oh … oh," you didn't know what to say, averting your gaze away from him and finding comfort in the wall behind him. 
Sunghoon paused, gaze following yours, looking reluctant whether or not to continue the conversation, but alas, he did. "How have you been?"
"Bad," you laughed a little, and Sunghoon's ears perked at the sound of it that he hasn't heard for ages. "You?"
"I quit skating,"
That was surprising. How could he have? Skating was his dream, his past, present and supposed future, but now, it came crashing down. You didn't know if you should feel sorry for him, as you have been a part of his journey, but one bit of you also seemed to have started mourning the changed Sunghoon that stood before you.
"Why?"
He shrugged, hands slipping into his pocket with a solemn look. "I lost interest. I'm into music now, I'm in a band with the guys,"
You heaved a breath, a deep one. Ironic it was that he was doing music now when he was the one criticising you in the past for wanting to pursue it. Who even was this person? With a new appearance came a new personality, he was much further away than you thought despite the physical distance.
"You've changed," you didn't know what prompted you to say that, maybe it was the disbelief or the denial that he was someone new, but whatever it was, neither of you could deny the fact that he did change. "I'm scared of the person you've become,"
A beat passed, an unreadable expression on Sunghoon's face that you couldn't distinguish even though by now you thought you'd know every one of them. 
"And I'm scared you're still the same."
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Seeing Sunghoon that night seemed to have altered something in your life. Somehow, he was everywhere you went. 
Who was working at the register? Sunghoon. Who was at the park? Sunghoon. Who was at the party Yunjin managed to drag you to? Sunghoon.
It was haunting.
All those little encounters didn't mean you talked to him like normal, though. The awkward tension in the air still remained, seeing each other only reminded you and him both of your pasts, and you hated it. That explained why you were having a hard time seeing him at another party you were at.
Yunjin was much more of a party goer than you expected, and she successfully convinced you to go to all of them. It was fun until you got drunk and started being emotional. Your efforts of hiding from Sunghoon that night failed when he barged into the empty room you were sobbing in, whether it was accidental or not, you didn't know, you wished to not know.
"Y/N?"
His voice brought back the times he called your name. Both the good and bad ones. You stared up at him from the ground, tears welling your eyes. The person you were looking at was someone you thought was a soulmate, but now stood as someone closer to a stranger than a friend.
"W–what are you doing here? Why are you crying?"
The alcohol messing with your brain was processing his words, but what came out from your lips was the total opposite of an answer. "I'm sorry, Hoonie," 
Sunghoon's eyes widened at the nickname, the privilege that only you had. He kneeled down, taking a seat on the ground opposite you, a visible distance in between.
"I hate this—us—I feel like if we gave it one night, to talk, to just feel—you'd hate me less and make it alright," you choked back the sobs building up in your throat, the dizziness making you unaware of how Sunghoon reached out only to hesitate and pressed his hand back to his side. "Just wish that we could fight now, I'd hold you on the comedown …" your voice faltered, head leaning onto the wall.
"Y/N, you're drunk, we can talk this out another day," Sunghoon striped off his jacket and covered your exposed thighs with it. "Just … don't avoid me. I–I don't hate you, I just hope we can have a decent conversation without thinking about the past,"
He admitted it, how the two of you had secretly been thinking about the past, letting it be a big wall in between instead of growing from it. Yet, you could tell the unspoken anger and sadness still lingered, choosing to pour out gradually and unknowingly.
"Bet you wish you never even met me," you started slurring, hand gripping onto his jacket tightly. "I can't blame you, I broke your every heartbeat," your eyes were shut, images playing in your mind, not knowing the saddened look dawning on Sunghoon's face.
"Let's get you back."
In your sleep that night, you saw him. He was there, so far yet so close, and just like reality, he was hard to reach, harder to understand compared to before. He was a knife cutting deep, leaving a mark that constantly reminded you of the past. 
How could you even make everything go back to the way it was?
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Sunghoon was on your front door step the night everyone was out for dinner except you. 
You hadn't expected him to turn up, thinking it'd be you that stood at his doorstep instead as you still had his jacket from that party (which you do not want to think about again).
"Sunghoon. Hey," the door was opened and you leaned against it, trying your best at hiding the hint of pining in your gaze. 
"Oh, hey," he greeted back rather stiffly, dressed in a simple attire with the classic white Lacoste sneakers that he always wore. "I–I wanted to—"
"Take your … jacket?" You cut him off half way, nerves wrecking your brain.
A beat passed, Sunghoom visibly gulped. "Y–Yeah, my jacket,"
"I'll go grab it for you," you jerked your thumb over your shoulder, awkwardly scurrying back in to retrieve his jacket and coming back to see him chewing on his bottom lip, seemingly nervous. "Here. Thanks for it,"
"No problem," Sunghoon coughed, grabbing the jacket but absolutely paying no mind to it. His stare was straight at you.
"That's all, right?"
"Yeah,"
"Yeah," you echoed, hating the sudden rigidness between the two of you. "Bye then, Sunghoon,"
"Bye," Sunghoon said, looking dazed. Weird.
You saw him backing away and decided to close the door, but before you could even do so, a force had stopped you from closing it. Not a force, much rather a hand, his hand. The door was pushed open, and you physically jumped at the suddenness of it. Your eyes met Sunghoon's sorrowful ones.
"Don't push me away, Y/N, not again,"
"Sunghoon," 
He made his way in, closing the door behind him and you let him. Was this seriously happening?
"You said you wanted to give us one night to talk, so I'm here now. I didn't care about the jacket, I cared about you. I hate seeing us like this, it's like we're strangers," Sunghoon let out a frustrated huff, eyebrows furrowed.
"We can't just pretend nothing has happened between us,"
"So you want me to hate you instead? You're saying as if it's easy, Y/N, feelings don't work that way!"
"Then how do we go back to how it was? We can't, that's the truth. You're not the same person I used to know,"
"Cut the bullshit. I'm the same as I was, maybe just a little different than I was years ago, but that doesn't change anything. When does that ever stop you from loving?"
Were you too scared to love?
Sunghoon ran his hand across his face, wetting his lips. "You’re scared of change, and I don’t think that’s something new about you,” 
Ouch.
“But I really wish you could let it all go. I don’t hate you, nor do I harbour any anger regarding the things that happened years ago. It hurts, it did, but seeing you now made me feel the opposite of all those emotions,” Sunghoon took a deep breath in, and you were holding yours. “I think about you a lot, actually. I regretted a lot of the things I said and done, and I wanted to say I’m sorry. I’m sorry for not being there for you and giving you the support you needed. I should've fought for us and not leave, I–I—" Sunghoon choked, unable to hold in his overpowering emotions anymore.
You didn’t say anything, instinctively closing in and pulling him into your arms, letting his head lie on your shoulder, ignoring the feeling of his warm tears soaking the fabric of your shirt. "I'm sorry too, for leaving you so easily,"
You stood there with Sunghoon in your arms, inevitably crying along and sobbing out your own apologies, the ones you had owed him and hidden all these years. He held you tight just as you did, and it felt like the nights he had you in his arms whenever you cried. You eventually calmed down whereas Sunghoon was still composing himself, avoiding your gaze.
You took the opportunity to hug him again, tighter and firmer this time, as if trying to stop him from running away. 
"Can we start over? I don't want us to be strangers," 
You heard a sniffle, then a shaky breath of relief. "I'd love to,"
Pulling away, you locked eyes with him. They were twinkling brighter than the stars in the skies outside, filled with a spark of hope. "I'll make us some hot tea. Do you want to … stay over?"
"Can I?"
"I really want you to."
It didn't take more to convince Sunghoon to stay, all you had to do was ask and he'd listen. 
That night, you and him hid in your room, talking for the whole night until the break of dawn. Nothing about the way he talked had changed, nor his laughter or the crinkles around his eyes when he smiled. He told you about the band and some side gigs, offering to bring you to some too. 
You laid there in bed laughing all night, occasionally peeking over the side of your bed to check up on him who slept on the extra mattress, only to meet his eyes and freeze. 
The red string of fate tying you and him together was beginning to reform.
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Not feeling dread every time you saw Sunghoon was a new start for you. In fact, you were glad to see him. 
The misunderstandings and complexity built up over the years were finally addressed, leaving you to peace and a small hope of rebuilding what you had with him. But you kept that thought away for now, holding onto the pieces you had at the moment.
"Come to one of my gigs," Sunghoon made a trip to your house on a random afternoon, a box of your favourite chocolate covered strawberries in his hand. He never forgot anything about you, didn't he?
"Are you bribing me or asking me?" You said despite accepting the box, your heart squeezing at the thought of him remembering the littlest details about you.
"I'm asking you but also offering a gift," he let himself in, almost like always, and you didn't even notice, just letting him do so. "I saw it and I thought of you so I got it,"
"Thanks," you waved the box a little, setting it down on the table and leaning slightly against it. "You still remember," 
His gaze softened. "Of course I do," his hand by his side was itching to reach out, but it never did, instead, he played it off by giving you a smile. "So, what do you say? This Saturday, watch our gig at the pub," 
"Are you singing?"
"I wish I did," he laughed, and you momentarily recalled the times you had karaoke sessions with him. Curse reminiscence. "I play the bass, Heeseung's the front man," 
You nodded slowly, picturing them as a band and smiling slowly. You've missed them, and it was then when you realised it. "I'll go,"
"Really?"
"Obviously, do you want me to say no?"
"Well, no," Sunghoon chuckled, quite literally unable to hide his excitement from the way he's grinning widely. "I'm just … glad, and surprised, and happy,"
You bit back a smile, shaking your head at him. "Text me the details, will you? I don't want to miss it."
Saturday rolled around quickly. You and Yunjin were sitting in a corner of the pub, beers on the table and whispering gossip about some of your high school classmates. High school might've ended years ago but gossip never stopped.
"Alright, folks, the next act is someone you already know, they are not strangers," the manager of the pub stepped onto the small stage, announcing Sunghoon and the guy's band. "Please welcome … April Nights!"
April? 
You bit your tongue, an odd feeling boiling in your stomach. April was the month you broke up with Sunghoon and left for university, it was more than just a coincidence for him and his band to have 'April' in their name. All you knew was the sinking feeling never went away.
"You alright?" Yunjin noticed your silence, casting a worried glance at you.
"April …" you mumbled, eyes staring straight ahead at Sunghoon who was setting up his bass on stage. "There must be something behind it,"
"What?"
"Nothing,"
You shook away that feeling currently eating up and put your focus on Sunghoon instead. It wasn't your first time watching him perform. It has always been him on ice in a big arena, but now it was him on a small stage at a dingy pub.
Sunghoon's eyes wandered all over the room, finally landing on you, a smile spreading on his pretty face. You managed a small smile, waving a little to let him know you're there, you're actually there and not a figment of his imagination, a dream that he has been wishing on for far too long.
The first song they played was an ABBA song. To be specific, it was your favourite ABBA song that you would listen to with Sunghoon in the past. Was it a coincidence?
You knew Heeseung had a vocal of stars, but to hear it for the first time in years was sending you into heaven. However, you failed to keep your focus on him, redirecting it to the bassist. You couldn't stop looking at Sunghoon, and his gaze wouldn't leave yours either. 
The second song soon came by, and at that point onwards, you knew it wasn't a coincidence. It only took two songs for you to realise that Sunghoon had prepared a set list of your favourite songs. The band was currently playing Iris by The Goo Goo Dolls, a song you had loved ever since forever.
You shouldn't be feeling light headed, but you were.
The set ended almost a few hours later. It was filled with your favourite songs, undoubtedly. The whole time, you were truly holding your breath, especially when Sunghoon was holding your gaze.
While people were filing in and out of the pub gradually, you stayed. It was well past midnight and Yunjin's cheeks were pink from the alcohol, wandering off to join Heeseung and the others. You, on the other hand, were sober as hell, waiting for Sunghoon with nerve wrecking anticipation.
"Hey, hey, hey. How did we do?" Sunghoon slid into a seat like an apparition appearing out of thin air. You jumped a little, but melted into a smile at the sight of him.
"You guys were great," it was genuine, because they did do amazing, probably more than just amazing. "'April nights', an interesting name,"
Realisation dawned on Sunghoon's face, he swallowed thickly. "I—yeah. April was an interesting month,"
"The set list …"
"Right, the set list," he chuckled, shifting on his feet a little nervously and stiffly. "I figured since you're here I'll play some of your favourite songs,"
"Oh," you let out softly, not knowing what else to say, this was something you found yourself acting around Sunghoon now. "That's … nice,"
Sunghoon gouged your expressions and the tone of your voice, a slow frown etching onto his tired face. "Did you not … like it? I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable,"
"No, it's not that! I'm just—" you paused, thinking of an appropriate word to describe how you felt. Frankly, you didn't know your exact feelings. "—surprised and … confused?"
"Confused?"
"Sunghoon, we're exes, and you pulling this isn't exactly helping—this—" you gestured to the space between you and him. "Us,"
Sunghoon was silent for a moment, occasionally opening his mouth to say something just to close it before he could. "I—maybe I read it all wrong, I thought—you know what, forget it,"
"Don't. Just tell me," you reached over for him, but didn't touch his hand. "What are we? We're not exactly best friends nor are we enemies. I don't want any tension between us and I don't want you to think you have zero chance at all," you breathed, searching for his eyes. "I would want us to work out again, if that's what you want too,"
Sunghoon's eyes glistened with a spark of hope, relief washing over his face. It was an answer to his question. "I want us to work out. I want us to have another chance," his hand reached out for yours the first time since you've seen each other, feeling the warmth of his touch that you were no stranger to. He carefully and gently intertwined his hand with yours.
"We'll always find our way back to each other."
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It was odd but comforting to know that nothing has changed when it came to you and Sunghoon.
Sunghoon brought you to your favourite places, ate your favourite dishes, did your favourite activities as an attempt to rekindle everything back. Safe to say it was working.
Just like the first dates you had together, you felt yourself having the same bubbly feeling internally, the same giggles you caught yourself having after a stupid joke he made. Despite all that, over the course of a few weeks, it had you wondering about your relationship with him.
"Will you date him again?" Yunjin could tell you were struggling, even if you didn't say it, it was still quite evident.
"What's with the sudden question?"
"Well, considering he has taken you out on so many dates and still hasn't asked you to be his girlfriend again, I could tell you're troubled,"
"Okay, mind reader," you grumbled and shifted in your seat, hating how right she was. "He said he wanted to give us a chance again, so I was expecting that—you know—we'd get back together soon,"
"Your 'soon' seems a bit urgent, but I don't blame you," Yunjin shrugged, gaze softening at your words. "I can tell how much love there still is between the two of you. It's natural to gravitate towards each other, but time, time is what you need to heal the scars, Y/N. It's been years, give yourself time."
You suppose giving yourself time truly was what you needed. But when you mentally said you needed space, you didn't mean wanting Sunghoon to ignore you. 
That's right. He was ignoring you.
How did you know? Apparently, the hard way.
Calls, messages were all brushed aside. You didn't even see him physically. At one point, you considered him dead, but seeing him at a party proved to you that he wasn't.
"What the fuck is your problem?"
Cornering him was a challenge, but being headstrong and slightly buzzed, nothing could possibly stop you.
"Y/N?"
"Wow, I'm surprised you remember my name," you seethed, almost stumbling forward and throwing a punch at him. "So, we're playing the game where you get back at me and ghost me after all that we've been through lately? Sweet! Could've given me a head's up though,"
"What? You're the one who's planning to abandon me just like before!"
"What are you even saying?" 
"Your email, Y/N. I saw your email. How you have a big job in London and you just can't wait to join, throwing me away like a summer's fling right before you leave,"
"You're not making any sense, I'm not accepting that role!" You were heaving at anger at this point, matching the fumes emitting from Sunghoon's ears. "You dickhead! I'm literally throwing my dreams away and you're here thinking I'm leaving you again? Is that what you thought of first? Oh, maybe you could've just asked me, but you didn't, just like the past,"
Bringing up the past had triggered something not only in you but him. He blinked, keeping silent but chewing anxiously on the inside of his cheek. 
"You never changed, huh?"
You heaved a deep breath, shaking your head a little, not to answer his question, but at him. 
"Well I guess that makes the both of us."
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"I fucked it up, didn't I?"
The night after the confrontation, you woke up on Yunjin's couch with a hangover thanks to your habit of drinking your problems away. Remembering Sunghoon's face and the feelings you felt literally had you shrivelling back into the couch, a deep frown etched on your face.
"Partly, yes, but mostly, no," you felt the couch dip beneath Yunjin's weight as she joined your side, a warm cup of coffee in her hand. "He fucked up first, but I think it's all just a big misunderstanding,"
"I don't we've healed from it," you took the cup from her and drank from it. "He's scared of me leaving and I was considering leaving again. Maybe we're just not meant to be,"
Yunjin sighed, moving her body closer to you and placing a comforting hand on yours. "If you're not leaving, that means you're staying, which also means you get to make it right. You get to have time to mend it all unlike the last time,"
"I have to make it right, don't I?"
A nod of confirmation from Yunjin was all you needed to know your next step. So, you decided to show up at his gig in the same exact pub without thinking through it twice.
"He's not here tonight," Heeseung looked thoroughly puzzled by your sudden appearance, and it seemed none of them knew about the small altercation you had with Sunghoon. 
"Really?"
"Yeah, he's been acting a bit … off. We asked him to take a night off, maybe you should give him a call."
If only it was that easy. 
Walking back home with a dejected heart was not the plan you had in mind. A part of you even thought this was truly the end, maybe he reached the conclusion of going no contact and you have no choice but to accept it. Was this karma?
It didn't help that you walked past the park that you and Sunghoon used to run off to back in the past.  The exact bench which you and him sat on still resided there. Your curious mind led your legs towards it, taking a seat and remembering all the memories you shared with him. 
Being alone under the night sky and getting accompanied by the dim light coming from the street lamp had given you a chance to rethink your choices about coming back home, whether it was worth it to see Sunghoon once again and try for the closure you never got. Well, look where it got you now.
The ruffles of the leaves got you snapping your head towards the direction of the noise, but it only landed on a figure.
"Y/N?"
You squinted, waiting until the figure walked under the streetlamp to distinguish that it was … Sunghoon. You should be feeling glad now that he was there in front you, but why were you feeling the exact opposite?
"Sunghoon? W–what are you doing here?" You stood up, watching him getting closer, the anguish in his face was clear.
"I–I … I went to look for you," he started, carefully and slowly inching closer until there's a comfortable distance between you both. "You weren't home and I thought … that was it,"
That was a fatal flaw you and him shared, wasn't it?
"I went to the pub to look for you too," your voice came out in a hushed whisper, breathing becoming ragged. "And you weren't there, so I thought … I thought it was the end too,"
"Fuck's sake, I know I said this many times but I'm sorry, Y/N," he sounded desperate, apologetic and almost exasperated. "I'm sorry for assuming things and ignoring you, I guess I never really got rid of the avoiding thing. I'm just … scared of you leaving me and I can't accept it again,"
"I'm not leaving, Hoonie," you were the first to reach out, to touch him and pull him into your embrace. "I didn't think you'd see that email so I never said anything about it. But I'm not leaving, okay? Not this time, never again. I'm here and I'm staying,"
You heard Sunghoon's quiet breathing next to your ear, his calming heartbeat thrumming against your shoulder. "I'm sorry, I really am, Y/N. I said I wanted to make this right but why does it feel like I'm fucking it all up?"
"You're not, Hoon, trust me. If I have to be honest here, both of us have past scars that aren't healed yet. It takes time, one step at a time, and that was what I learned. I think we're not fully healed from the past," you held onto him tighter, spilling all your hidden truths. "We can make it right, but first, we have to forgive ourselves, forgive each other and move on,"
Sunghoon pulled away a little, but his arms still remained around you. It was the first time you were ever so close to him since the split, wholly vulnerable and showing him your truest emotions. 
"I forgive you," he whispered, pearly tears threatening to spill from the edge of his eyes. "And I'm sorry again,"
"I forgive you too," your grip on his jacket tightened, a small comforting smile appearing on your lips, one that Sunghoon reciprocated. 
"I don't think I'll ever stop loving you," he confessed, a little out of the blue, but it was something he needed to get out of his system before he burst. "Those years when you were away, I see you in everyone else, I don't think anyone could ever compare. I still love you even after this long,"
Your mind was in a haze upon hearing his confession, sincerity and longing hidden in his words but evident in his eyed. For a moment, you thought of what you could say, but nothing came to mind, so you did the first thing your body told you to. You kissed him. Actually, it was more of a peck, a simple quick peck that was enough to shock both him and you.
"I'm sorry!" You saw his wide eyes and wondered if it was a good time to have even done that.
Sunghoon melted into an expression of adoration, a wide smile etched on his lips, as if in both disbelief and relief that you kissed him. "Don't be sorry," he stepped closer, only an inch measured the distance between you and him. The space became smaller when he leaned down, eyes flickering down to your lips. "Can I?"
Was this happening? "Yeah," 
Sunghoon didn't waste any moment in meeting your lips with his. It was natural, easy, for you to kiss him just like first instinct. The amount of desperation, sadness, anger and love were poured into the way he kissed you. There wasn't any urgency, but it spoke louder than intended.
It was short, but it was enough to let the both you know the true feelings you harboured for each other. By the time you pulled away from him, you felt his eyes on you, a giggle erupted from you unexpectedly, and he started joining in.
You really looked like a lovesick fool standing under the streetlamp with your lover. 
"Do you want to stop by that old spot we used to go to?" Sunghoon suggested, a little shyly this time.
"The one nearby?"
"That one,"
"Let's go then." you nodded, casting him a soft smile. 
Sunghoon didn't say much, but his hand did the talking by reaching for yours. He held onto it tightly, intertwining his fingers with yours and swinging your interlocked hands as you walked. He might've not said much, but you could tell how he felt.
Feelings might be complicated, and  making amends with the history behind a broken relationship was equally challenging, but what mattered most was getting back with the one who you called your soulmate, your lover, your best friend.
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( © jaylver all rights reserved. do NOT copy, plagiarise or edit my work and repost whatsoever. once discovered will be exposed and blacklisted. )
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brewed-pangolin · 4 months
Text
Soap Cuddling Headcanons
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This was an ask I received forever ago, then tumblr decided to eat it because I don't know. Apologies for this taking soooo long.
18+ MDNI Sexual Themes
SFW and NFSW below the cut because why the hell not.
Soap loves to cuddle for one reason and one reason only: touch
He's touch starved. He craves it. Begs for it. Yearns for it when he's half a world away with you always creeping around in the back of his mind
And when he's home, he can barely think of letting you out of arms reach
It was a bit overwhelming st first, to have him always so close and needing so much physical affection
You didn't push him away, but you did have to maintain some personal space at the beginnings of your relationship
But that all changed after his first lengthy deployment
On those long, lonely nights. Reaching out to him and feeling nothing but cold emptiness beside you in the bed
That's where you fell into his spell and began to yearn and ache for his touch just as desperately as he did
SFW
It doesn't matter what you're doing, if you're within arms reach, your going to be wrapped up by him
Cooking? Yup. He'll have his hands on your hips while comfortably resting his chin on your shoulder
He'll whisper soft, culinary praises into your ear while he watches intently, following your fingers as they diligently move across the cutting board
"Smellin' good, hen. Be a shame if ya had t'waste any, yeah?" And you fell for it. Every single time
Don't be surprised if those hands on your hips begin to wander. It's nearly impossible for them to stay in one place for too long
Loves to wrap his arms around you during the weekend late movie nights
Will intentionally put on horror or suspense movies just so you'll scoot closer, and he can hold you tightly against him while you tremble in his arms
But where this cuddle monster truly shines is in bed (and not just after a romp)
He'll cling to you in the morning, arms wrapped around your torso and his face nestled unto the curve of your shoulders
Big spoon. Little spoon. He doesn't care. As long as his skin is touching yours, he's happy
Will prolong mornings the first few days back home, willing to push aside responsibilities and spend the entire day in bed
Netflix and Chill Extraordinaire
But Cuddling isn't only sanctioned for the bedroom
Soap is a romantic at heart, and he'll whisk you away to his favorite outlook up in the mountains in his 4Runner
Just to build a fort of blankets and pillows in the back and watch the sunset like a true Casanova
And movie nights are best under the stars at your local drive-in
Nestled deep within in his arms as you leave the world behind to enjoy each other's comforting embrace (and loads of overly butterd popcorn)
NSFW
Soap MacTavish is the absolute KING of aftercare, especially after your more vigorous and enthusiastic sessions
He'll keep you close, wrapped within his muscular arms, and pressed against his sweat drenched torso as you ride out the last waves of your climax
"So good f'me, lass. Ya did so good." He'll whisper, voice muffled as he buries his face into the crook of your neck
He's in no rush after a lengthy romp. You need 15 minutes? 30 minutes? Two hours? Soap's not going anywhere
Except to get the towels. He knows he makes a mess, and your legs are currently jelly after your umpteenth orgasm
But if you already planned on having an earth-shattering sexcapade, the towels are already on the nightstand because...
Cockwarming
Soap can't help it. He loves being buried to the hilt deep inside you
Especially when he softens and your walls continually pulse and milk every last drop of him
And you pull the most beautifully pornographic whimpers from his lips
"Fuckin' hell, bonnie. You an' that greedy lil cunt a'yers.."
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And as previously stated, he's in no rush to pull out.
In fact, he may just fall asleep.
His arms caging you tightly against him as he drifts into a restful slumber with his cock sheathed snuggly within your silkened heat
@deadbranch @sofasoap @d3athtr4psworld @punishmepunisher @homicidal-slvt @glitterypirateduck @obligatoryghoststare @jynxmirage @mykneeshurt @shotmrmiller @astraluminaaa @writeforfandoms @thetrashpossum @simpingoverquestionablemen @kkaaaagt @designateddeadend
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fookinfandoms · 2 years
Text
all in a days work
pairing: tangerine x female spy! reader
plot: The twins have been hired for a high risk job, unbeknownst to them that they weren’t the only ones. You just happened to be first.
authors note: i’m really writing something for a mf named TANGERINE. but I loved the movie and I loved his character. Mwah. Let me know if this is too ooc! I love feedback!
Not edited.
3.2k words
PART TWO HERE
warnings: no smut in this one, potentially part two. language, mentions of blood, violence, they’re assassins idk what you expect tbh, you both fight each other :)
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 “Did you seriously knock my brother out with a fryin’ pan?” Tangerine yells out, stopping you in your tracks. The lights of the kitchen flickered on and off, loud music bouncing off the walls from the club outside. 
Lemon lay unconscious behind a counter, his head now sporting a rather nasty mark. Tangerine stood near the exit, one hand on his gun and the other holding a hard drive. His eyebrows were furrowed as glanced between you and his brother. 
Your head tilts to the side as you shrug. “He had a gun and I didn’t, I think he got off easy.” 
The gears turn in his head, wondering whether or not you were worth the effort. He waves his gun in your direction. “What’s this then?”
“Just another obstacle in the way,” You haven’t moved an inch, taking the time to plan your next move. You haven’t fought the twins before, but they were famous in the industry. Messy, yes, but they got shit done. “I’m going to need that hard drive however, and it would be a shame to put a mark on such a pretty face.” 
“Aw, you think I’m pretty?” He retorts, shoving the small device into his coat pocket. “Feelings mutual, but I’ve got the gun darling, and it seems like you’re all out of frying pans.”
Frustration crawls over your skin, and he smirks, believing he had you cornered. Tangerine can see your eyes glancing between him and the door behind him, and he almost considered letting you leave, albeit empty handed, until he remembered his brother on the floor. 
“You know,” He really thought thought he had the upper hand on you. “I’ve heard of you two before, the fruity twins and I-“
“Fruity twins? Are you having a laugh?” He interrupts, and it was your turn to smirk as he glares. “Fuckin' fruity twins?” “I mean, you are Tangerine and Lemon right?” You retort, pointing at his brother. “I’ve heard a lot about you two, Bolivia yeah? Hard stuff that, left quite a name for yourselves. Fruity names however, but names nonetheless.”
“You think you’re funny don’t you?” He hisses, his finger itching to pull the trigger a little more than before. “Who even are you?”
One more minute.
The muscle in his jaw ticks as you shrug again. “I think I’m pretty funny, I mean… I did just take down a fully grown man with a skillet, that’s a story for the grandkids don’t you think?”
“That didn’t answer my question, who are you and why do you want this?” He pats his coat pocket, a reminder he and his brother had gotten to the intel before you. 
“Angel,” You told him truthfully, watching as his eyebrow raises at the admission. “And I was hired, just like you.”
“Fitting name,” What a cruel punishment the universe has bestowed upon you. A gorgeous man with an accent flirting like it was his second language - with a gun aimed at between your eyes. “How much?”
You swallow and look around him quickly. “One million.”
“Christ, one million? We were offered half of that! Who fuckin’ hired you and off-“ Tangerine wasn’t able to finish his sentence as a loud bang swallowed you both. Dust and small pieces of the ceiling fell around, filling the air as multiple little bombs went off in unison through the building. 
There was the back up plan. They weren’t big enough to kill anyone, rather stun. A last resort in case you had been caught up.
Tangerine drops his gun as he covers his head in an attempt to hide from the debris, and you quickly take the time to kick the piece of metal away from him as your other leg rises and knees him in the side. He grunts, and as your leg raises for another kick, Tangerine pounces forward, grabbing your waist roughly and uses his weight to push you into a counter behind. 
You head is knocked back at the impact, and before the man in front of you can move you’re already throwing your elbow at his cheek. He curses, baring his teeth like a wild animal as he blocks another hit thrown his way. Pushing yourself off the cool metal, he holds his hands up in defence, shaking his head as you await his next move. 
“I really don’t want to do this.” He grunts out, his hair sticking in all directions. 
“So you could shoot me but a fist fight is off the table?” You push away the stray hair that had fallen out of its up-do, a laugh leaving your lips. “How noble.”
“I’m giving you an opportunity to leave here with your life,” He steps to the side with a smile, the exit behind him looking better than ever. “I have what I need, don’t need to add to the body count.”
Tangerine again pats at his coat pocket, but his smile slowly disappears as he feels nothing. His hand slides in, and he immediately begins patting at all possible pockets on his person. “What the fuck.”
“This?” You hold up the hard drive, wiggling it around before sliding it into the safety of your bra. “You’re not that bright are you?”
He sighs before turning his gaze to the roof, shaking his head with a string of curses. “Something tells me you like the idea of being thrown around love,” Tangerine slides off his coat and throws the material to the ground, rolling up his sleeves as you grin. “A little too much.”
You jerk your chin at him with a chuckle. “I do love a good tussle.”
Tangerine pounces and you’re already sliding out of the way, grabbing at a loose wine glass and throwing it at his head. The glass shatters and a grunt escapes him as the shards dance around him, but he doesn’t have time to register as you’re swinging your knee into his stomach again - the same spot as before. His muscles tense at the pain in his body, and he throws a punch, getting you in the collarbone. You stumble back at the force, but another grin grows realising he wasn’t holding back.
He raises his arm to swing again, but using the counter as leverage, you lean backwards, letting your legs wrap around his upper half and twisting - sending the larger man to the ground. He slides beside his brother as you catch yourself, kneeling beside him. His eyes widen at the sudden action, and you’re already raising your fist when he moves his head, dodging the blow. 
Your fist hits Lemon, and you release a little gasp at the mistake. He doesn’t budge however, still knocked out by the frying pan from before. Tangerine uses his long leg to kick you away from him, rolling onto his belly as he notices his gun hiding under a grill. He reaches for it, but you’re quicker than him - throwing yet another glass his way as his covers his head. 
“Stop throwing fuckin’ glasses!” He shouts, dodging another. 
“I have a whole set here,” You reply, reaching for the fine dining ware, as he uses his sleeve to push the shattered pieces from his skin. “Stop reaching for your gun!”
Tangerine swears again, slowly getting up off the ground. His shirt was rather torn up from your assault, but your dress wasn’t looking any better. Had the two of you not been currently trying to kill each other, the man might’ve offered to take you home. “Just give me the damn USB, we’re the ones who actually worked for it.”
You laugh at him, your red lips curling in a snarl. “Only because I cleared the office for you, don’t you think the place was rather empty all things considered?”
Lemon was actually the one who noticed the place had a lack of security, but the two didn’t want to push their luck. The intel was easy to grab, who would complain?
You nodded at him, watching the realisation hit him. “Yeah, dumbass - I did that. You didn’t check the closet did you? Whole bunch of dead guys, thanks to me.”
He scoffs, propping his hands onto his hips. “Bullshit, why didn’t you just grab the shit and go then?”
“I was busy setting up my backup plan, I didn’t know the job was handed off to others.” You raised your hands in frustration. It wasn’t uncommon for gigs to be palmed off to others, but that was usually involving a human target, not intel. 
“Yeah well, seems we both got fucked love,” He says, wincing at the pain in his side. “You’ve got a mean kick to you, you know that?”
“No one usually lives long enough to say anything.” A long silence ensues and you eye the man in front of you wearily, praying to whoever that his brother doesn’t wake up anytime soon. He gestures to your chest, your eyebrow raised at the action.
“One more chance, just hand it over and you can leave.”
You shake your head. “No can do.”
Just like before, he launches. His movements were well calculated, you’ll give him that - but your smaller size compared to his larger one was a good advantage. The two of you fought for a little longer, both refusing to back down. He got in a few good hits, but you had managed some that would leave more marks. Having had enough of you punching his kidneys over and over, Tangerine wounds his arms around your waist, throwing you onto the counter. 
Your thighs wrap around him as you slide to the side, bringing his head down to smack his forehead against the steel surface. He looses his balance, and you turn around onto your belly in an attempt to slide to the other side. Tangerine grabs at your leg however, sliding you back towards him.
Your nails try to grip onto the slick surface, hoping to grab something but you’re already being turned onto your back - his large hands holding down your wrists, his lower half keeping you pinned. 
His skin was flushed red with small cuts here and there, but you were sure you weren’t exactly far off. He stares down at you with a bewildered expression. “Did you,” He huffs out, grimacing as his muscles tense at the pain bursting through his body. “Did you plant fuckin’ bombs everywhere?”
“Guilty.” You replied, your breath coming out laboured in an attempt to catch it. 
The two of you stare at each other for a moment, both in an attempt to get in a full breath of air. Tangerine stares down at your cleavage, your breasts rising and falling quickly as you wince in pain. The hard drive was quite literally in arms reach, but he knew better than to let go and give you a free hand. 
“How we doing this darling?” He says, chuckling as he nods towards your chest. “Am I reaching in there or are you?”
“Aren’t you a gentleman?” You reply, feeling him push against you a little harder. “Is that- Are you? I really hope that’s another gun in your pants.”
“It’s not,” Tangerine looks down towards his pants before back to you, shrugging. “You’re not the only one who loves being thrown around.”
“You got me the-“
“Angel? Angel can you hear me?” A voice fills your right ear, a beeping following suit. You gasp, ignoring Tangerines expression as you hear your handlers voice for the first time in hours. The connection in this place was the worst, and you had gone in on the job completely blind. You would have forgotten about your earpiece had he not said anything. 
“Xan!” You speak aloud, the man currently pinning you to a counter looking around for another person. “It’s my handler, sh.”
“Oh I’m sorry darlin’, is this a bad time right now?” He rolls his eyes at you, almost in shock at the woman below him. Is she really on call right now?
“I’ll explain later, but you got about ten ravens, coming your way,” Xan was worried, that much you could tell. “You’ve got less than a minute.”
That wasn’t nearly enough time to get Tangerine off of you and out the exit. The Englishman stares, watching your expression go from shocked, to your eyebrows furrowing. You look around for anything and then tilt your head back, staring down at the door where the bad guys will soon be entering. 
Fair enough, you begin to hear heavy footsteps coming your way, and Tangerine looks up at the other doors, having heard them too. His weight feels a little less heavy against your thighs, but his hands still grip at your wrists.
There just wasn’t any time. 
“You’re not married are you?” You ask, using the distraction to slide your thighs beside his waist, sliding your calves up behind his lower back and locking your heels behind him.
He mumbles a little huh before shaking his head. Great.
With your legs locked behind him, you pull him down on top of you, bringing his lips to yours. His mouth was searing hot, and his eyes were wide at first in shock before he melted into the kiss. Tangerine’s hands leave your wrists, one hand gripping at your waist as the other holds himself up. The kiss was heavy and hungry, and your now free hand fisted at his ripped shirt in an attempt to draw him closer.
The hairs above his lip tickle at you, an almost funny feeling. To stop yourself from commenting on his facial hair, you bite at his lip. He groans against your skin, and his tongue was just about to sneak past your lips when the doors barge open, causing the gun for hire to seperate from you. 
You whine at the loss of his touch, half of you playing the part, the other genuinely missing the feeling. Hiding yourself in his shoulder, Tangerine brings one hand behind your upper back, shielding you from the men who had just entered the room.
“Can we fuckin’ help you?” He yells at them, glaring at their amused expressions. You both sent silent prayers they didn’t enter the room any further, their guns would no doubt be out and proud if they spotted Lemon on the floor behind you. “Can’t a man get some privacy?”
One of your hands laid against his pec as you titled your head towards him, feigning embarrassment. “Baby,” You kissed at his neck before bringing your head near his ear. “Can we go somewhere more private? I don’t like an audience.”
Tangerine swallows the urge to groan. “Seriously gentlemen, you’re scaring my lady here.”
The men say something, but you don’t speak French, and clearly neither does Tangerine - but what he said works, and they slowly but surely leave after scanning the kitchen, seeing it was relatively empty apart from you two horn dogs. 
Once the doors close behind them, you both visibly relax, Tangerine’s shoulders dropping as he releases a breath he was holding. You’re sitting up, your legs still wrapped around him with your chest pressed against his. “How did you know that would work?” He asks, amazed and feeling rather warm at your quick thinking.
“Public displays of affection, they always make people uncomfortable.” Tangerine scoffs at this, his hands resting on your waist. 
“Affection? You were grindin’ into me like your life depended on it.” 
You gasp at him. “I think you were the one humping me like a dog, and don’t get me started on that caterpillar above your lip tickling me!”
He chuckles loudly at you. “Ladies love the ‘caterpillar’ darling, never had any complaints.” 
Someone groans from behind the two of you, and your attention turns to the twin on the floor. Lemon was slowly waking up, and Tangerine immediately lets you go, rushing to be beside his brother as he comes to. 
You felt almost guilty, having been the one to knock him out and punch him - albeit accidentally. Tangerine leans down, clicking his fingers in his brothers face. 
“Angel, you have a clear exit straight ahead,” Xan speaks through the earpiece yet again, confused by your location having not moved. “What… What are you doing with a frying pan?”
Again, you almost felt guilty, but you couldn’t afford to have the two of them come after you.
“I’m really sorry for this,” You say, and as Tangerine turns to look at you, you’ve already swung, letting the metal connect with his head. “Seriously, really sorry.” You were hoping not to use as much force as before, wanting to slow him down rather than knock him out cold.
He falls over, landing on top of his brother. Loud groans leave the two of them, Lemon feeling the weight of his brother and Tangerine now kissing the floor. Yeah, it was too hard.
You climb over the two of them, leaning down to pull Tangerine off of the other man and laying him upright. His eyes roll into the back of his head as pain vibrates in his skull, and he doesn’t notice as you reach for his phone in his other pocket. 
“W-What,” he mumbles, his vision blurry. “What are you doin’?” 
“Giving you my number,” You tell him nonchalantly. “Give me a call when you’re no longer pissed off yeah?” 
He wasn’t sure if he heard you correctly, and by the time his eyes have focused - you’re gone, and he was ready to fall asleep - and he did. 
He wasn’t sure how long he had been knocked out for, but it was definitely less than Lemon. Your heels were left behind and his phone was left beside him, the device pinging with a text from an unknown number with an angel emoji. 
Tangerine sits upright with a wince, noticing Lemon holding a bag of frozen pees against his head.  His brother throws a spare bag of frozen carrots at him, and he catches it, copying his actions “You want to tell me what the fuck happened in 'ere?”
The man on the floor sighs, knowing you had run off with the hard drive. “She got away with the intel.”
“No shit,” Lemon pushes the pees closer to the bump on his head. “I’m just surprised she kept us alive.”
This intrigued him. He knew of you? “You know Angel?”
“You don’t read anything I give you do you?” He mutters something along the lines of idiot and typical Diesel. “She was in the files I gave you last week, she’s good, real good.” 
“She kissed me.” Tangerine replies, ignoring the digs made at his lack of awareness. 
“And?” He retorts, not following along. Lemon had read your file in great detail. You were skilled and a quick thinker, so it didn’t shock him that you had the upper hand on his brother.
“And I think I’m in love.” Tangerine stares down at his phone, the angel emoji staring back at him.
“Oh fuck off you are.” 
8K notes · View notes
reidreaders · 6 months
Text
Walk of Shame
Poorly Kept Secrets: Final Part
MASTERLIST
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Summary: Spencer gets called into the BAU in the middle of the night, while sleeping at your place. When he gets the office looking disheveled, his secret is finally out for good.
Pairing: Spencer Reid x Reader
Word Count: 1.2k
Warnings: established relationship, secret relationship, kissing, Spencer is very tired, not proof read, I think that's it? let me know if I missed anything :)
A/N: I really love this part! I hope you have enjoyed this series! My requests are open so lmk if there's anything you want me to write! Enjoy besties :)
Spencer had just returned from what seemed to be a particularly grueling case. He had been gone for almost two weeks, and when he finally got back, he looked exhausted. Now, Spencer always looked kind of tired, but you had never seen him with such bags under his eyes, struggling to keep his eyes open as you two watched a movie on the couch. 
“Hey, Spence,” you whispered, trying to get him to open his eyes, “c’mon baby let’s go to bed.”
Spencer’s eyes flickered open, his half awake brain trying to process what you said. 
“No, I want to spend time with you.” He stated matter of factly, as he buried his head into your shoulder. 
You just giggled, slowly standing up and grabbing hold of his hands to hoist him off the couch. He held your hand and followed you down the hall to your bedroom, as grumpy as ever. 
When you reached the bedroom, you gave him a pair of pajama pants he had left at your house a few weeks ago. He put them on and crawled into the bed next to you, pulling you by the waist to be as close to him as possible. It wasn’t long before the both of you were fast asleep in each other’s arms, your limbs intertwined into what can only be described as a pretzel. 
You awoke suddenly, practically jumping out of your skin at the startling sound of Spencer’s ringtone blaring through the bed room. You rolled over to look at him, not understanding how he could possibly be sleeping through this. 
“Spencer,” you nudged him, “Spencer your phone.”
Without a word, he rolled over to grab his phone off the nightstand next to him, groaning when he saw who was calling. 
“It’s Hotch.” He said, his tone desperate for whatever emergency was waiting on the other end of the phone to disappear. 
Reluctantly, he answered the call, mumbling a series of ‘yeahs’ and ‘uh huhs’ into the phone. Before you knew it he was throwing off the comforter and changing back into his work clothes. 
“Another case?” You asked, your voice filled with pity. You couldn’t contain how sorry you felt for him. He had been working for almost two weeks straight and now he had to go back in, running on a mere three hours of sleep. 
“Yeah.” He sighed, leaning down to kiss you goodbye.
Once he pulled away, he started to make his way out of the bedroom. You threw the covers off and followed close behind him. Before he could open the door, you pulled him in for a passionate kiss. You couldn’t let him leave with just the sleepy kiss you had shared in the bedroom after all. You cupped his face in your hands, while his were on your waist, pulling you close. It was evident that he didn’t want to leave, especially without knowing how long he’d be away for. 
“Come home safe to me, Dr. Reid.” You said, looking at him with more love than he knew how to process. 
“I’ll do my best.” With that, he leaned in to give you one last quick kiss, and left. 
Spencer felt like he was sleep walking as he entered the BAU, still feeling as though he was in that space in between awake and asleep. The poor boy was so tired he didn’t even notice the abundance of looks he was getting from the rest of the team. Spencer was in such a daze when he left your house that he didn’t even think about the fact that he was wearing the same clothes he had been yesterday, except now they were devastatingly wrinkled from the hours they spent in a pile on your bedroom floor. His hair was messy. He hadn’t thought to do anything with it before leaving your house, leaving him with a severe case of bedhead. All this to say, Spencer looked like hell, and it did not go unnoticed by the rest of the team.
He managed to make it all the way to his desk before someone finally spoke up.
“Wow! Of the people here I’d expect to be doing the walk of shame, our boy wonder here was on the bottom of the list.” The comment came from Rossi, who was displaying genuine shock at the fact that it appeared Spencer had not yet been home. 
The bullpen fell silent. By now, the rest of the team had found out about Spencer’s secret, but they had been sworn to secrecy and the last thing they wanted to do was break his trust.
“What do you mean?” Spencer asked through a yawn, not yet awake enough to understand what was happening.
“He means…” Morgan spoke up with a glint in his eyes that said he was getting ready to make fun of Spencer a little, “you clearly haven’t been home yet, pretty boy. So, who’s the lucky lady?”
That snapped Spencer back into reality. He looked down at his clothes and realized how horribly disheveled he looked. He tried desperately to smooth the wrinkles out, but quickly gave up when he realized it was no use. He frantically ran his hands through his hair, knowing how messy it must have been. 
“Oh-I-um-well-” Spencer couldn’t get the words out. Everyone but Rossi already knew about you, but he knew that once the secret was really out, they’d all want to meet you. Your relationship was still relatively new, you guys had only been dating for about a month, and he just wanted to be able to get to know you without the team interfering. He knew they meant well, that they were excited for him, but they had a tendency to be overbearing when it came to his love life, and he didn’t want it to affect his relationship with you.
 “Oh c’mon Spencer,” JJ piped in, “everyone already knows.”
This seemed to really catch Rossi’s attention. “Everyone already knows what?” He asked, clearly feeling left out of the big secret.
“Reid’s got a girlfriend!” Emily sang.
“You’ve got a girlfriend?” Rossi exclaimed, clearly excited for Spencer. “Why didn’t you tell anyone?” He questioned.
“Well-um-hm-well, I didn’t really have to. Everyone kind of found out on their own.” Spencer sputtered out.
Rossi looked shocked, and a little hurt that he was the last one to find about the new girl in Spencer’s life. 
“So everyone knows?” 
“Yeah, everyone knows.” Spencer said shyly, not wanting to hurt Rossi’s feelings any worse.
“Well, since I was the last to find out, I get to be the first to meet her!” Rossi said excitedly, happy that he found a way to be included. “Bring her over for dinner when we get back from the case!”
Spencer sighed, knowing he wouldn’t be able to get out of it this time. “Alright,” he said reluctantly, “But you have to be nice, no telling embarrassing stories about me or prying too much into her personal life or profiling her or anything like that.” he stated. 
“Wow, you must really like this girl, huh?” Rossi said, feeling nothing but thrilled that Spencer had finally found someone to love. 
“Yeah,” Spencer blushed, “I really, really do.”
I had so much fun writing this part! I hope you guys loved it as much as I do 😘
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chilling-seavey · 25 days
Text
Nothing Looks the Same in the Light (ln4 op81)
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↳ A/N I use my Wham! obsession every chance I can get. This song was playing as I was cleaning my apartment and this idea played in my mind like a movie.
↳ Inspired By 'Nothing Looks the Same in the Light' by Wham!
↳ Summary: "I watch you breathe, I cannot sleep. I touch your hair, I kiss your skin, and hope the morning sun won’t wake you too soon [...] Nothing looks the same in the light. Only a fool like me would take to heart the things you said you meant last night."
↳ Pairings: Lando Norris x Oscar Piastri
↳ Word Count: 1364
↳ Warnings: Might tug at your heartstrings. Contains an open ending...and I know how you all hate those whoops
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The sunrise cascaded ribbons of golden light across the crisp white sheets of the king size bed, weaving and dancing over the two forms that lay motionless in the sea of linen. It was a calm and quiet morning, the four wallpapered walls of the five-star hotel protecting its timid guests as they slept soundly. The sunkissed bedclothes embraced the two young men, shielding their bare skin from the chill of the air conditioner and the shame that might have arisen with the dawn of a new day. 
Last night was a whirlwind. A race, a podium, a drunken confession. The memories were hazy and choppy, unclear, mortifying. 
Lando was wide awake. 
He couldn’t remember when exactly he had woken up - he knew that he had slept at least somewhat - but he seemed to have watched the sun creep up the wall as it rose for the last however long. He had laid there, unmoving, unblinking, for at least an hour, not wanting to risk rousing the person who took up the other half of the bed alongside him. He didn’t want to have to face the reality of his situation right away. 
Oscar was too sweet to kick him out, he knew that much at least. 
Selfishly, Lando wanted to bask in this moment just a little longer. Just long enough to appreciate the purgatory that lingered between a clueless slumber and the awkward conversation that would certainly arise once Oscar woke up. Hopefully the orange sun streaming in through the sheer curtains wouldn’t wake him too soon. 
Besides, Oscar looked so angelic as he slept. 
Faint, peaceful breaths fanned across the pillow from the slumbering younger of the two, the only sound in the silent room. Lando was captivated by the gentle motion of Oscar’s body as he breathed; the way his chest rose and fell slowly but surely under his cautious arm that had wrapped around his middle sometime in the middle of the night. Oscar was always the calmer of the two, always the observer. Now, in the morning light, Lando gladly took that label for his own. 
Sleep deprived green eyes stared at the freckles that dotted the warm skin of the young man beside him in picture perfect constellations. Moving cautiously, Lando set the pad of his index finger against one of them at the base of his neck and then traced the invisible path to another across his shoulder. Goosebumps rose in his wake across the pale skin and Lando’s lip perked up faintly at the corner. He leaned in the few centimetres between them to softly press his lips to one of the freckles in a timid kiss. 
Oscar smelt like champagne and sunshine, an ode of citrus in his hair from the hotel shampoo, hints of alcohol from the night before that now tingled on Lando’s lips, and he took an opportunity to just breathe him in. Fresh and sweet. They were pressed so close together that Lando’s nose was almost touching the nape of his neck and his selfish fingers ghosted up the top of Oscar’s spine, over each vertebrae, to finally caress through the roots of his messy brown hair.
Lando had never done this before; shared a bed with a man. Certainly not one who was his teammate if nothing else. There were boundaries in this career that one dare not cross. In such a public position, Lando didn’t have the space to risk the opportunity for rumours, so he kept everyone at an arm's length away.
But it always felt so right with Oscar. From the moment they met Lando knew he was royally fucked. 
Lando had always been the more experienced of the two in all aspects of racing, of Formula 1, of the whirlwind world in which they were a part of. Here, now, Lando felt entirely clueless. He was a slave to the passing of time and the inevitable approaching moment of which he would have to look Oscar in the eyes and hear that this was a mistake. 
Curse the celebratory champagne for coaxing a drunken confession out of him. Maybe he should have listened to George and stayed away from alcohol on race weekends. 
Blinking slowly, trying to piece together the night before, Lando could see visions of Oscar in the darkness of his eyelids. His stupid little pout, his bashful eye roll, his whispered voice slurring his accent with the consequence of too many drinks. 
“Take your time...”
The tentative touch of his hands on his skin, their limbs entangled, plush lips pressed together in between tiny whimpers of desire gone unsaid. 
The memory made him shiver, his heart squeezing in his chest. This was why he never let himself get close to anyone. This was why he prioritized racing over anything else. Stupid, stupid feelings. 
Lando was startled by a faint car horn blaring from somewhere outside the hotel, startling him from the peace. The sharp sound had Oscar shifting in his sleep with a sigh through his nose, hands folding under his cheek against the pillow. Lando’s arm snaked back around Oscar’s waist, tucked safely over the duvet, and he tightened his grip just enough to pull him closer until their bodies were moulded together in parallel shapes. All he could do was wait and see what would become of this. Soon Oscar would be waking up and what would that bring? 
Lando felt like a fool.
He felt like a fool for ever thinking that Oscar would want him back, for thinking that Oscar would wake up and not have regrets about everything that happened the night before, and, especially, for throwing caution into the wind and confessing his feelings to his teammate like some meek love-sick puppy. How pathetic. Lando wanted the sunrise to swallow him up and incinerate him into a dimwitted pile of ash.
With his arm absolutely motionless around Oscar’s waist, Lando’s palm was pressed gently to his stomach, feeling the warmth of his skin under the duvet and the firm muscle of his lean body. Oscar’s abdomen rose and fell with every breath, moving Lando’s gentle hand along with it. In, and out. In, and out. It was almost lulling Lando back to sleep, letting his mind focus on that serene moment where it was easy to pretend that everything was perfect and right there in that hotel room bed was where he was always meant to be. 
The sudden change in Oscar’s steady breathing had Lando stiffening in cold anxiety, keeping himself frozen still as Oscar inhaled deeply and let it out with a soft heavenly sigh as he awoke. The rustle of the sheets as he stirred and stretched was the only sound in the room and it was almost deafening. Lando watched the muscles of Oscar’s back flex and move as he turned over to face the ceiling, hands raising to rub his red-rimmed brown eyes, still exhausted and, now too, hungover. 
Lando dared not breathe, as if it wasn’t glaringly obvious that he was clearly present in the bed beside him. 
Finally, Oscar rested his hands gently over the blankets around his chest and he lolled his head to the side to look at Lando under slightly furrowed brows. The faintest hint of a pout on his face had Lando almost shying away under the covers, his heart racing with adoration and his stomach twisting with anxiety. Even still, Lando couldn’t get himself to look away from his eyes, his arm still around his middle and their legs crudely tangled under the wrinkled sheets. 
It was as if it took a few seconds for Oscar to process who he was looking at but, even as he did, his expression stayed stagnant, rich brown eyes squinting in the morning light that poured in through the windows. Lando swore he had never seen brown eyes sparkle the way Oscar’s did in that moment. Neither of them moved. 
Oscar cleared his throat slightly before trying to speak, breaking the silent uncertainty that lingered between them in that moment, his voice deep and raspy and his accent thick, “Hey.”
Somewhere, in the distance, a bird sang.
“Hey.”
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My Very Extensive Tag List™: @wetforwolff
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None of the original writing on this blog may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the author.
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stillnotyourmusebitch · 2 months
Note
AAAGH I loved your sinner!Adam fic about him and Reader watching TV together 🥺
I heard you take sinner!Adam requests so is it okay to have a sort-of part 2? Maybe watching movies became a regular thing between them and one time they end up kissing during one? If you find it repetitive and don't want to it's totally okay, I understand! I hope you have a nice day and keep up with the good work 🥹
Oh I loved writing this. The fic below is a sequel to this ficlet
I do hope that you liked it. I'm always worried I've made him too ooc but Sinner!Adam is fanon based atm and if he is wanting redemption he would change his ways.
So Urm yeah enjoy. . . .
What we watching?? Sinner!Adam x GN!reader
Fluffy af
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That night watching trashy romcoms with Adam could have just been a one off thing and you would’ve been fine with it. But when he approached you in the communal kitchens the next morning with a proposition to make ‘Thursday film night’ a regular thing between the two of you. You had asked him why. He said that hanging out with you yesterday was one of the most fun things he had done in a long time. You smiled fondly at him before agreeing.
-
As Thursday night rolled around again. You were looking forward to sharing some more of your favourite films with Adam. He’d said he would be there by 6ish. You glance at the time on your phone. It was only 6.05pm. He’s probably just running late after the one on one session with Charlie.
An easy way to keep your mind busy was dragging out all your blankets and making a sort of nest type thing on the floor by the couch. You used to do this with your family when you were alive. It just made the movie marathons all that more special. After seeing how far Adam had come since arriving at the hotel. You had really wanted to show him how much he meant to you.
‘Wait, as a friend.’ You stopped mid cushion grab. You liked him as only a friend right? Right?
Your door burst open and slammed shut very quickly Adam was only 45 minutes late, you looked up seeing him breathing hard, carting an armload of snacks, drinks and a few bowls of things.
“There you . . .” he shushes you looking frantically at the closed door. “What did you do?” You whisper as you crawl onto the couch.
A far off loud shouting could be heard in the silence. He waited a minute more before letting out a breath.
“It wasn’t my fault honest.” He looked extremely guilty. You quirked a brow wanting an explanation. “I was trying to make my super awesome dip for our movie night but I maaaaaay have made a really big mess but I didn’t mean to, I just tripped over that cleaner chick who was chasing more of them roaches. This hotel must have an infestation or she is breeding them just to kill. Oh wait, I’m getting off point, the thing is I might have made too much of the dip than I intended and I kinda launched half of it onto another patron. But it wasn’t my fault. This time at least.” He frantically spoke as he juggled the drinks and snacks about in his arms before depositing them carefully on the coffee table. Standing back up he turned and looked down at what you were making. “What’s that?” He points to the accumulated amount of cushions, blankets and other soft furnishings piled on the floor.
“Well, the thing is.” You hopped off the couch into the nest trying to act like it wasn’t a big deal. How were you supposed to explain the reason behind it without him laughing at you? “You know what it’s stupid let me just . . .” You felt shame rush to your cheeks as you tried to dismantle the obviously stupid idea.
“Hey, I didn’t say it was a bad thing. Looks comfy as fuck. Budge up would ya.” You hopped out as he set himself down in the dead center of the nest, keeping his legs open slightly to give you a place to sit. Last week he really liked having you snuggled up close to him, why did you think this week would be any different.
You chose the first movie and plopped yourself down in the space he left for you, his arms wrapping around your middle pulling you flush against his chest.
“So what we watching?”
-----
“I have a question do all of these movie have the same premise?” Adam asked after about 15 minutes into the third film.
“Whatdya mean?” You say through a mouthful of chips.
“Like . . hang on pause the film a sec.” He fumbles for the remote to stop the movie. You shuffle a bit to see him better. “Like don’t get me wrong they’re good films, a bit cliché but surely the lead woman knows that the ‘Oh I’m a famous something or other I have no time for a man’” his fake high pitched womanly voice had you laughing. “Hey shush let me finish my thought.”
“But you make such a good woman.” You poke at his chest playfully.
“Ah ha ha ha.” He grabs your hand in his. “But seriously shush. My point is are there any original ideas in these films?”
“You saying I got trash taste in cinema?” You try pulling your hand away from his grasp. Adam doesn’t let go but pulls you closer to him.
“What I’m saying is watching all these oblivious people who clearly have strong feelings for the other person, got me thinking.” He looks down at your hand in his. “Ya know what never mind let’s keep watching the movie.” He lets go of your hand and grabs for the remote, setting the film going again.
The whiplash from that conversation was enough to make your head spin. You stayed a second more simply looking into the face of a man who had something he wanted to say but couldn’t bring himself to do so. As you turned back in his arms to watch the movie, you could hear a small sigh of relief.
You tried to go back to watching the movie but you couldn’t. Adam only held you loosely now, choosing to focus more on grabbing snacks and sipping his soda. Your mind went into overdrive.
‘What did you do wrong?’
‘Was he mad at you?’
‘Did he . . . wait did he like you?’
You almost choked on a piece of popcorn at the realisation. Adam liked you.
Daring to flick your eyes to look at him. He was focused on the film but the soft look of longing he bore was almost too much.
“Adam?” Your voice was gentle so as not to spook him.
“Mmmyeah?” He was still watching the screen.
You grabbed the remote and paused the TV again.
“Hey, it was getting to a good part.” He looked down at you annoyed. “What. Is there something on my face?” He touches his face trying to feel for any irregularity. “Hey, say something you’re freaking me. mmmf” You pulled him down by his shirt and kissed him. He froze against your lips.
‘Shit was I wrong?’
You move to pull away. But his hands cup your face pulling you back into a tender kiss that makes you melt into his touch. The kiss lasted no longer than 5 seconds but you didn’t care you felt like your entire body was floating.
“I’ve wanted to do that for so long.” He spoke softly as he broke the kiss. “Can I kiss you again?” he asked hopefully.
“Yes.” Your words were barely a whisper but it was all he needed to pull you back against him, he kissed you in such a tender way that made your heart flutter in your chest. You didn’t realise he was capable of such gentility but you craved more of it. Your hands carded into his hair, being careful of his horns, as one of his hands went to cradle the back of your head, effectively tilting your head to allow him to deepen the kiss. His other hand moved to your lower back, fingers gripping the fabric of your shirt. The kiss had an undertone of heat laced in the movements of your joined lips.
You broke the kiss panting slightly, you noted his pupils were dilated slightly as you were sure yours mirrored back.
You had to slow this down now before you regretted anything.
“Adam.” Your voice low in warning. “As much as I enjoy kissing you. Can we take whatever this is a little slower?”
You expected him to whine or pout about being told no. but he just smiles goofily at you. Swiping a thumb over your lower lip.
“Sure thing.” He kisses your forehead before helping you settle back against him the way your were before. He picked up the remote “Ready to continue?”
You weaved your fingers with his other hand and nodded “Ready.”
--------
I hope this is what you wanted.
My ask box is still open if anyone else got requests
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moremaybank · 9 months
Text
UR BEST FRIEND — s.c
pairing sarah cameron x fem!reader
summary sarah's dating john b, but also happens to be in love with you; john b's best friend. (based on the song "ur best friend" by kiana ledé feat. kehlani)
warnings oral sex (fem. receiving), fingering, choking, spitting, scissoring, language, cheating (sarah on john b — oops), kinda toxic and a lil angsty with a fluffy ending
author's note the "ur" is intentional! song linked here ♡︎ please listen to it, it's one of my faves of all time and you def won't regret it
sarah masterlist
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we ain’t felt like us in a minute
whole damn time i knew i shouldn’t have did it
might’ve got too excited, i’ll admit it
almost called your name when he was in it
Sarah finds that she can’t cum unless she pictures that it’s you who’s making her do so. It’s not like the sex with John B is bad. It isn’t. It’s a shame what she’s doing to him, convincing him that she’s head over heels and insatiable when it comes to the love and touches he provides her with as if she doesn’t feel those very things for his best friend. But she can’t bear to hurt him. She cares about him deeply, and there is a connection there. 
Still, ever since you came around and intertwined your life with hers deeper than she’s ever imagined, she’s been missing that spark with her boyfriend. The spark that makes her knees weak and makes her stomach do flips. The spark that ignites a flutter in her core, that makes her soak through her panties in anticipation of the pleasure that will soon fill every molecule of her being. 
The spark that only lights because of you.
She opens her eyes, and she’s almost disappointed when her eyes land on John B’s and not yours. Your soft skin isn’t pressing against hers. Your kiss-swollen lips aren’t the ones melting into her own like silk. The moans of ecstasy aren’t emitting from your sweet mouth. 
All Sarah wants is you, and she has you. But not right now, and not in the way she truly longs for.
ooh, it’s wrong, but you make me feel right
textin’ your phone while right beside him
wish it was anyone besides him
It’s date night for Sarah and John B, the two of them on the couch in the chateau as they watch a movie. 
Sarah scrolls mindlessly through her phone, her feet propped on John B’s lap while he dozes off. The main characters in the movie are slowly becoming intimate, their kisses growing deeper and sloppier as they begin to remove each other’s clothing and profess their love in a toe-curling fashion. 
Sarah’s thighs squeeze together as she tries to quell the ache but also provide a small sense of friction to her throbbing clit. She’s crazy. John B’s right there. She could take care of things right now, and find her release with the help of her boyfriend. But she isn’t thinking about him.
She’s thinking about you.
She whips out her phone once more, opening her messages and clicking on your shared chat.
i miss you :(( please tell me you get off work soon
Her eyes flit up to the top left corner of her screen, noticing that the time is now nine o’clock on the dot. Once her eyes return to your messages, she sees that you’re typing. Anticipation and excitement roll through her as she awaits your response. 
just finished baby. meet me at mine in a half hour?
Sarah grins as she types out her response.
you can bet on it <3
i was with my man last night
and i just realized what i felt that night wasn’t wrong
thought about you in the whole car ride, like
i hate that you ain’t your best friend (x2)
“God, I missed you,” you mumble against Sarah’s wet lips. 
The minute she stepped inside your house, you pulled her in for a kiss and wouldn’t dare let her go until you got a little fill of what you’d been waiting all day for. Then, before you both knew it, you were piled into your shower with your naked bodies pressed together as one.
Your lips trail down her neck as your hands move to massage her breasts. You pinch her nipples and she sighs as she leans against the wall. Her back arches and she pushes herself further into your hold. 
“I missed you more. Haven’t even gotten off properly since the last time I was with you.”
“Yeah?” You ask, leaving more open-mouthed kisses on her skin while you slowly sink to your knees. “I can fix that for you if you’d like.”
She nods, her eyes screwing shut when she feels your thumb swipe over her clit ever so lightly. “Yes. Yes, please.”
You grin, “So pretty when you beg for me, baby.”
Your hand hooks under the back of her knee and you pull her leg over your shoulder, opening her core up to you. Your hands then move to cup her ass, and you force her cunt onto your tongue. Her hips buck when your tongue graces through her folds, licking and sucking at anywhere you can reach. You flick stripes onto her, taking your time and teasing her as you ghost around her most sensitive bud. You can taste her arousal as it seeps out of her more and more, and you savour it as if you’ll never get another chance to do so. 
“You taste so good,” you murmur. You slip a finger into her slowly, pulling back to watch her face contort in pleasure. “You’re so tight too. Barely giving my finger a chance to move, baby.”  
Returning your mouth to her, you trace the outline of her clit and feel her buck her hips into you when you start to suck on it. You pull away to speak as you add another finger. They hook up into her g-spot, curling and probing it as your eyes lock with hers.
“That’s it. Ride my face. Use me just how you like,” you encourage, sticking your tongue back out for her use. Her hands slip into your hair as she obeys you, holding your head in place and riding your tongue with need.
Her moans grow louder, and you shake your head back and forth when her motions falter, helping her reach her high. Your face is practically buried in her when you flick her clit just right and press the special spot inside her simultaneously, causing her to fall apart. She releases your head, twisting and pulling at her nipples as she rides out her orgasm. She shivers, nearly losing her balance if it weren’t for your hold on her. 
“I love watching you cum,” you speak, slowly slipping your cum-coated fingers out of her hole and rising back onto your feet. Your other hand grabs her face as you push your fingers into her mouth, letting her taste herself. “You look so pretty, like an angel.”
hey, he had the courage to step up ‘n pull up
six speed like
puttin’ so much work, just to make it work
and he’s almost perfect, and that’s why it hurts
and he calls me family, that’s what make it worse
You’d harboured feelings for Sarah long before she was even on John B’s radar. Truthfully, you didn’t think she would ever be into you, and so you never made a move. But the guilt bubbled inside you so powerfully whenever you saw the two of them together. It also didn’t help that he’d come to you for everything, especially when he was in dire need of help. You suffered through hearing about their first date, the first time they slept together, and everything in between. 
You envied him. If only you’d had the courage the way he did, maybe you’d be in his position. Getting to call Sarah yours in public. Kissing the life out of her whenever you saw her, no matter who was around or watching. Being the only one who got to touch her and make her cum in the heavenly way she did so. 
It isn’t fair. Lusting and pining after your best friend’s girlfriend. John B’s always been there for you, without fail, and he’s one of the most important people in your life. But you can’t help your feelings, they’re uncontrollable. And though you wanted Sarah first, you couldn’t just turn off what you felt for her in the blink of an eye.
“You good?” Kie asks as you watch John B pull Sarah into his hold, seeing the two of them giggle and beam at each other. 
“Yeah, ‘m fine. Why?”
“Maybe because you’re giving John B and Sarah the death stare.”
Your head snaps away, your eyes finding Kie’s immediately as you try to play it off.
“Nah, it’s not…it’s not like that. I just zoned out. I got a lot going on.”
“Whatever you say,” she hums, taking a swig of her beer.
Your eyes move back onto the couple for a few seconds, and Sarah happens to catch your eye. She gives you a saddened look, mouthing an I’m sorry to you form across the way. You nod in response, giving her a half-hearted smile before getting up to get another drink. 
There was no way you could stomach the sight of them sober.
it’s wrong but i make you feel right
you textin’ my phone while right beside him
wish it was anyone besides him
“Oh my god, yes!” Sarah exclaims. “Please don’t stop. Please.”
You continue rolling your hips, rutting your clit against Sarah’s as you ride her pussy. You’re clutching onto her left leg, adorning the skin of her calf and knee with kisses. Her pleas rile you up further, and your left hand grabs her by the throat. 
“Open wide for me,” you command with a stern voice, squeezing your hand slightly. 
Sarah listens, always one to follow your orders. Her tongue sticks out as she stretches her mouth open for you. You lean down, spitting into it and letting your grip on her tighten as you ride her harder. 
“Now swallow.”
Sarah does as you say, showing you the proof when her mouth opens up to you again.
“Such a good slut for me, hm? You’d let me do anything I wanted, wouldn’t you?” Your fingers stuff into her mouth, nearly gagging her as you begin to swivel your hips in a circle and throw your head back as the pit in your core tightens. It starts to build, tighter and tighter as you’re on the brink of your release. “Shit, I’m gonna cum.”
You retract your fingers from her mouth and they find purchase in her hair as you pull her head up to your chest. Sarah sticks out her tongue, slithering it against one of your nipples as her eyes lock on yours. Her hot breath against your flesh makes you shiver as it breezes over your wet bud. You cry out when you cum with Sarah right behind you as her head falls back against her pillow. 
“Yes, fuck!” 
You nearly collapse on top of her, your lips finding hers and capturing them in a greedy kiss. You lick into her mouth, tasting her as your chest heaves. When you pull away, her eyes are dancing with mischief.
“Wanna go again?” 
Before you can respond, her phone dings, notifying you both that someone has texted her. The hand she has on your hip squeezes it in comfort as she reaches over and grabs it. Her smile fades, and your brow raises.
“Who is it?”
She gulps, “It’s John B. He…He needs me. Something went down between him and JJ.”
“Right, yeah,” you say, climbing off of her slowly. “I’ll just go then.”
“Y/N,” she speaks, her voice in a pleading tone. “You know that’s not what I want. But he’s my boyfriend. I’m supposed to be there for him.”
“Yeah, I know. I don’t need you to remind me that you aren’t mine.” The bitterness seeps from your voice as you get dressed. “I’m just getting tired of being your secret.”
“Y/N, please. I’ll tell him. You just gotta give me time.”
“I have given you time! It’s been months, Sarah. And I know it isn’t easy for you, but, fuck, it’s not easy for me either. He’s my best friend.” Your movements come to a stop, and you find her eyes. “Maybe…maybe we should just end this. We both know that you won’t walk away from him, and I’m not gonna stick around and get hurt by you even more than I already have.”
Pain flashes across Sarah’s face and she gets out of bed. Her hands find your face when she reaches you, urging you to look at her again. 
“Don’t. Don’t leave me.” 
She pulls you in for a kiss, soft and head-spinning as her lips brush against yours. You try to resist, but you can’t help it. You melt into her and grant her access when her tongue swipes against your bottom lip.
You’re stuck. You’re in deep. Too deep.
you was with your man last night
and you just realized what you felt that night wasn’t wrong
thought me on your whole car ride, like
i hate that you ain’t your best friend (x2)
The drive home from Sarah’s is a mopey one. Void by The Neighbourhood buzzes through the speakers of your car, contributing to your sulking. Part of you wonders if she feels the same way you do. Far past hurt because you can’t be together. Envious when she sees someone else’s hands on you at a party, like she wants to rip them away from you and pull you into her own arms instead. Dying to kiss you when she catches your eye in public. 
Part of you thinks that she’s just into you for the sex. That the reason she won’t leave John B is because she’s getting the best of both worlds. A relationship with someone who dotes on you without ever wavering, and great, passionate sex with someone she considers to be her current fixation.
But you can’t be more wrong.
Meanwhile, on Sarah’s ride over to John B’s, all she can think about is ending things with him. It’s horrible timing, but the longer she waits, the worse it becomes. She’s hurting badly. She wants to be with you. More than she’s ever wanted anything in her life. The way she loves you is tearing her up inside because she’ll never be able to truly bare her soul to you if she’s still in her relationship.
Another thing weighing on her mind is how close she came to losing you today. Hearing how wounded you were by the fact that she didn’t really and truly belong to you, that you’re constantly forced to watch the girl you love with your best friend. She’s always so wrapped up in her guilt toward John B that she failed to notice that the guilt and pain were taking its toll on you too.
So she has to buck up. If she doesn’t, then she’ll lose you for good.
i always knew from the beginning
the whole damn time, it’s you that i was feelin’ 
seems like things are better when forbidden 
and that’s why i hate that
i hate that you ain’t your best friend
The next day, you’re still in a grumpy mood. You showered last night upon coming home, and you’ve been glued to your bed ever since. You roll your eyes as Jenny from Gossip Girl whines to her father Rufus about quitting school, and suddenly, you hear a knock on your front door. You let out a groan, dramatically rolling out of bed and making your way down to tell whoever’s choosing to bother you right now to fuck off. But when you open the door, you come face to face with the girl you love.
There she is, standing in the pouring rain, her clothes wholly drenched and her hair sticking to the sides of her face. 
“Sarah? Come inside, you’re going to get pneumonia,” you say. Your fingers circle her wrist and you tug her into your warm home. Your hands rub her arms up and down as you try to warm her up. You can practically hear her teeth chattering as her cold body trembles. “What’s wrong? Are you okay?”
“I needed to talk to you,” she murmurs.
“And you couldn’t have called me? The roads are crazy, and this storm is supposed to be the worst one of the year.”
“I love you.”
Sarah blurts it out so fast that you think you’re dreaming. 
“I— What?”
She tucks a wet clump of strands behind her ear, before grabbing both of your hands into hers. Her thumbs run over your knuckles as she searches for the courage to look at you again.
“You’re the reason I was with John B in the first place. I…I wanted to be close to you, anyway I could, because I thought that you were never going to make your move. You could never say how you felt about me, and then John B did, and I figured…this would be the only way to stay close to you. But I love you, Y/N. Not him.” 
Your eyes are welling with tears, and you smile. “Yeah?”
“Yeah,” she confirms, her own lips curling up as she watches your eyes sparkle. “It was never him. It was always you.”
You use your intertwined hands to pull her closer. “You better kiss me, then.”
And she does.
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sarah tag list (join here!): @maybanksbabe @thatsthewaythechrissycrumbles @urbestieboo @surftrips
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manicpixiedreamcurl · 9 months
Text
The More You Give ❧ (Part VII)
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Pairing | Eddie Munson x shy!reader
Warnings | 18+ only, do not interact if you are underage. Heavy petting, P in V sex, soft dom!Eddie. Discussion of uncomfortable sexual experiences. Inordinate amount of praise kink, good girl's, and vulnerability on both sides.
Word count | ~10,000
Taglist
Previous Chapter
❦⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄❦⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄❦⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄❦⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄❦
Most days, walking into the cafeteria comes with a cool sense of dread. A heaviness in your chest, mind working overtime to prepare yourself for an hour not quite talking with your not quite friends. You’re never sure what you prefer; the white hot shame that comes with laughter at your expense, or the simmering ache from being ignored entirely.
But there’s a levity to your mood today. You’re proud, or maybe more accurately relieved, at the circled red letter on the top right of your Chemistry test. 
You spot May at the usual table as you file in, catching her excited wave over the head of some of the cheer girls. The others offer a cursory glance before returning to their conversation, but May’s expression is expectant. “So? How’d you do?”
You grin. “A minus.”
“I knew it!” She squeals, removing her bag from the chair next to her to make space for you. “You always make a big deal out of tests, and then breeze through!”
She’s half right. 
Something about the weight of potential failure, some unknown consequence to doing poorly, always has you worrying about tests days prior, heart pounding in the moments before you flip the paper. Then you second guess yourself all the way through, scribbling over wrong answers before writing the same thing down again.  
But you certainly don’t breeze through. The weight of this test on your mind had you bursting into tears in Eddie’s van last week. What was supposed to be a movie theatre date turned into an impromptu study session at the library. Eddie sat opposite you while you read over your notes, writing up his campaign ideas and flicking through a book he’d found in the fantasy section before working begrudgingly on an essay about JFK he was supposed to have handed in the week before. He switched to the seat next to you when you failed to hide a sniffle, let you tuck yourself under his arm and press your face to his shoulder.
“C’mon,” he said eventually, coaxing you out from the damp spot on the collar of his shirt. “Talk me through what you don’t get, okay? I bet the answer’s up here.” He pressed a finger to your forehead, narrowing his eyes like he could pinpoint the spot in your brain the information was hiding. “We just gotta knock it loose somehow.”
He must, truly, have been bored to death as you went through the problem, starting over again and again each time you explained yourself into a corner. But he listened anyway, prompted you to keep going until you came to an answer that satisfied you, a conclusion that made sense, and then he listened to the next problem.
You apologised at the end of the night. For all the hysterics, for dragging him along to a joyless evening. He’d swiped the thought away with a casual wave of his hand. “You couldn’t be my smart girl if you didn’t have to study sometimes.”
Just thinking about it now, your eyes flicker from May’s hand on the back of the empty chair beside her to the place Eddie sits, far on the other side of the room. 
It’s an invisible line you haven’t crossed, spending any time with him at lunch. Eddie would never let you question whether he wanted you to sit with him, never let you worry about seeming clingy. He’d made it clear you were always welcome. What stopped you was that tug at your heart, that feeling that you’d be taking another step away, putting more distance between you and your friends. Or May, at least. You can’t remember the last time Heather sat with you more than once a week. 
And you promised, sincerely, that you would try a bit harder with the cheer girls. Apart from that one tipsy conversation with Tracy at a party, you’re not sure you’ve quite fulfilled that.
But you want so badly to tell him. Shamefully, it was your first thought when you turned your paper over today. Along with the usual relief came excitement, knowing Eddie would be pleased for you and make it clear, call you his smart girl till your face burns hot. 
“I’m just-” You start, tucking your bag up on your shoulder, glancing back to May. “I’m just gonna show Eddie quickly.”
There’s a pause. Her pleased expression, the gentle curve of her wax pink lips, doesn’t falter. Instead, it seems to calcify on her face. “Oh. You’re gonna sit over there?”
“Just for a while,” you reason. “Just to show him my grade. Okay?”
She makes a high mm hmm noise, half agreeing, half unsure, but you decide to take it at face value, making a beeline for Eddie’s table. 
As usual, he sits at the head, the frizz of his hair lit up in the natural light from the window behind him. His expression is a touch bored, eyes blinking slowly, chin resting on his palm as a boy at the other end of the table - young, with tight brown curls tucked under a yellow cap - talks a mile a minute. You catch the words radio and roof as you approach, but your own mind goes blank when you reach them.
You’d feel only excitement, if it was just Eddie who noticed your presence. For his part, his whole posture changes; from slumped over the table to sitting straight up, his pouty lips turning to an excited smile in your direction as his hand drops away from his chin. But on top of that, six additional faces turn to watch you walk up the side of the table. Maybe you could handle three, used to some attention from Jeff, Gareth and Matthew at this point, comfortable in their acceptance of your silly little fidgets and occasional long silences. 
But the other three, all freshmen, staring at you like you grew another head on the way over, have you shuffling in place, playing with the strap of your bag. You vaguely know Mike from watching him run out the door on the occasions you’ve babysat Holly, though his hair is a good couple inches longer than the last time you spent an evening at the Wheeler’s. The others, Lucas and Dustin, you know both from Eddie’s descriptions and his complaints. 
“Hi,” you say, voice quieter than you’d like as you wave at the group. 
“To what do we owe this pleasure, Princess?” 
Your mouth opens, and your throat closes. Your face feels suddenly warm under the eyes of his whole table. In an instant, you regret coming over here. What must you look like? What will they think of you, when they realise you came over here to brag about a simple test result? 
Eddie hums a questioning sound, bringing your focus back to him. He’s looking at you the way he does when you both know you’re going to have to be the one to speak first. There’s anticipation there, but the little curve of his lips is all kind patience. 
You swallow, glance down the table again. You make eye contact with Lucas, give him an awkward smile at his friendly wave. Even at that, you know the words won’t come. Sighing quietly, you unzip your bag and search through your books for the test, drawing out the paper and fiddling with the corner for a second. How do you tell him, all of them, that you really aren’t bragging? That more than anything you just want to thank him? 
Eddie’s eyebrows raise as he looks between you and the paper. When he holds his hand out, and you find yourself passing it to him instinctively, toes curling in your shoes.
“An A!?” He screeches immediately, thoroughly dispelling any hope you might have had that he’d keep it to himself. Though your face burns, you fight the urge to glance around and offer an apologetic smile to his group, to the people that turned at the sound of his yell, because this is Eddie. Any embarrassment you might feel pales in comparison to hearing the pride in his voice, to see it on his face. What do judgmental looks and cruel whispers from strangers mean to you when they’re caused by Eddie, so excited and pleased for you that he’ll yell it publicly?
You tuck the top of your foot to the back of your ankle, playing with your skirt, correcting him shyly. “An A minus.”
Eddie scoffs. “An A’s and A, sweetheart. I’d know, I’ve missed enough of them.” 
Knowing now that at least Eddie himself has taken it the right way, you let yourself indulge. “I was two marks off a real A.”
Eddie’s hand slams down on the table with a bang, making you and everyone in the surrounding area jump as he rises, kicking his chair back with a screech. You watch, left in some strange place between proud and mortified as he practically floats over to the neighbouring table, flicking the paper at a group of juniors dressed exclusively in neon. 
“You see that? My girlfriend got a fucking A in Mr Brown’s AP Chemistry class!” He moves the paper around, displaying it for each of them. “That shit’s like fucking gold dust- hey!” He turns to shake it at a passing boy with a calculator in his breast pocket. “You’re in that class, right? How’d you do in this test, huh?” 
“If you must know, Munson, I got an A plus.” 
There’s a moment of silence.
“Okay, man. Shit. Kinda showing off a little-” He turns to you, eyes wide and head tilted as if to say get a load of this guy, but you’re shaking your head, desperately biting back a smile. 
“Eddie!” 
“Ah, she calls to me.” He drifts over to you then, frizzed hair flying out behind him. You giggle a little wildly behind your hands, still shaking your head at him though any disapproval is for show at this point. Everyone who turned to watch Eddie crow seems to have returned to their conversations, this side of the room apparently well used to his outbursts. He stops close enough that he’s all you can see; his dimpled smile, eyes shining at you while he hands you your test back. 
“Take my seat, Princess.” He gestures with a wide arm, directing you to the chair he rose from. You make a quick glance over at the cheer table, find Caroline just sitting down now with her tray, and feel an unusual sense of relief. It feels like freedom, to be on this side of the room, and not directly under her gaze. 
By the time you’re settled in his seat, Eddie has retrieved a spare chair, carrying it above his head and dropping it down next to you with another outrageous bash. He collapses into it, his arm finding the back of your chair as he leans in to Jeff, sitting on your left. “You’re in that class, too, right man?” 
“You know, we’ve been friends three years now, Eddie, and you’ve never once taken an interest in my grades,” Jeff answers, shutting down Eddie’s inquiry before he can really ask. He turns to you. “Bet it was question 18 that got you, huh?”
“Mm, no, that was okay.” You answer. “Eddie and I went over retention factors so much at the library last week. I understand it way better now.”
Six pairs of eyes blink at you, and the relief you were experiencing is fading fast. Instead, you get the recognizable sense that you said something wrong. Your foot starts tapping at pace, fingers finding the edge of the table and running over the edge.
“You were at the library?” Gareth asks Eddie, aghast tone mocking but serious in its surprise.
“I’ve been to the library before,” Eddie bites. “M’there all the time.”
“We’re not talking about monopolising the fantasy section, here,” Matthew says. “You were studying, Eds.”
“I told you,” Eddie replies, widening his legs until you feel the denim of his jeans rough against your bobbing calf. “I’m working hard this year. Trying to get out of this shithole.” He presses his leg more firmly to yours, and you realise it’s a deliberate touch, a silent reminder that he’s there, that he’s not going to leave you alone with whatever’s got you fidgeting.  
“You said that last year,” Jeff says.
“And the year before that,” chimes Gareth through a bite of his sandwich.
“Yeah, well, I meant it this time,” he says, leaning back in his seat with a deep sigh. “Jesus, Henderson, you look like you’re gonna explode. Go on. So you’ve built your stereo on the roof.”
“Not a stereo, Eddie- a radio!” Dustin cries through a mouthful of cafeteria lasagne. 
Eddie’s face darkens. “Do I look like I give a- Christ.” He closes his eyes tight, shaking his head with genuine frustration, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Whatever, man. Please, please, just finish your story so we can all move on with our lives.”
Undeterred by Eddie’s rough tone, Dustin launches right back into what he’d been speaking about as you approached. Mainly focused on how he convinced his Mom to let him up on the roof in the first place.
You sigh in quiet relief as the attention of the table moves swiftly away from you, leg slowing until it stops shaking altogether. Eddie’s knee bumps yours, and you feel the warmth of him as he leans in to speak softly, just to you.
“My smart girl,” he says, drawing pleased shivers up your spine. “You deserve it, yeah? You worked real hard.”
“I wanted,” you start, grabbing at his sleeve, thumbing the chain that holds the leather together. “I wanted to say thank you for helping me. I know it was kinda boring.”
“Nah, glad I could help.” Eddie’s expression turns a touch sheepish. “I, uh, actually got a C on that History essay? Mrs Kelly said I would have got a B, if I’d handed it in on time, so…” 
Your eyes widen, barely able to process the sight of him now. Eddie Munson, who just yelled across the room about your academic achievements, now looking anywhere but at you, scratching his face and shrugging like his own barely matter. You find his hand, squeeze it tight until he shows you his eyes.
“Eddie, that’s brilliant!” You say. He puffs out air like it means nothing to him, shakes his head. “When-” 
“You aren’t even listening, Eddie!” Dustin calls from the end of the table. Eddie rolls his eyes, but then he gestures ;azily for Dustin to continue, now with the gift of his attention. It’s enough for anyone to believe he finds the boy annoying at best, but you know from how Eddie talks about them that Dustin’s kind of his favourite. There’s a clear fondness in Eddie’s tone when he rants about Dustin trying to contribute ideas to his campaigns, the begrudging respect he has for how unapologetically himself the boy is. The touch of jealousy that creeps in when he talks about Dustin’s friendship with Steve Harrington, of all people. Badass, my ass, he mumbles each time.
You listen in comfortable silence to the conversation as it continues, occasionally contributing a little yes or no when Jeff asks you leading questions, your fondness for him ever increasing. Only when you watch Eddie retrieve a bag of pretzels from his backpack do you remember your own lunch, too taken in by the awe in Matthew’s voice recounting the first time he heard a Judas Priest song, apparently life changing.
You frown at the realisation that the half empty bag is all Eddie brought for himself, immediately offering your open tupperware and holding it steady under his shaking head until he acquiesces to tearing one half of your sandwich in two, chewing on the quarter in between his contributions to the conversation.
Your ears prick when you move on to tearing the segments from your satsuma, handing a half to Eddie without a word. Amongst the chatter, Mike laughs about Dustin’s current failing grade in Latin, an unusual outcome for him. Dustin sighs like an old man. 
“I ask you, how many tenses does one language need?” He groans. “I thought there’d be something we could use for a campaign, The Exorcist style, you know? Instead I’m trying to remember the difference between types of declensions. Or I will, when I fully grasp what declensions are.”
The conversation about Judas Priest you’d found yourself somewhat involved in fades with how much you’re focused on Dustin’s defeated tone. One part of you is screaming that you could help him, that he seems really worried about it and he’s a smart boy so it probably wouldn’t be much work to get him on the right track. Then another part, the one that screeches and wails its distress until your head hurts, asks, what if he says no? What if he laughs? What if they all do? 
You open your mouth, wondering if you should just say it across the table. Just offer; just do it. Of course he won’t say no. And if he does, he’s Eddie’s friend so it will be gentle. Still embarrassing though. Your mouth closes again, teeth digging grooves into the gum behind your lips. Just help him. You pull your sleeves down over your hands, playing with the soft ends. You clear your throat, take a breath-
“I’m good at Latin,” you say, immediately cringing at how that sounds. But you’re pleased when Jeff goes on chatting about the album he just bought, letting you contribute to the other conversation across the table freely. Dustin blinks at you owlishly. “I mean, I can help. Tutor you, or something? If you want.”
“Seriously!?” Dustin asks, flashing you a braced grin when you nod. “That would be amazing! Thanks!”
You smile, just sighing out your relief when you feel another nudge at your knee. Eddie’s watching you, eyebrows raised. You shrug shyly, grasping the sleeve of his jacket again to fiddle with the chains. He pulls free, but only to take hold of your hand instead. 
You’re basking in the feeling of knowing Eddie’s proud of you, your own pride in yourself, and you know you couldn’t force yourself back across the room today if you tried. 
❦⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄❦⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄❦⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄❦⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄❦
You realised, walking alone to class, that you hadn’t spoken that much during lunch the entire time you’d been at highschool. Giggling at Lucas’ jokes, asking about their DnD characters, getting increasingly comfortable talking about metal with a group of people who are genuinely excited to hear about your introduction to the genre. By the end it felt almost natural; simple and fun to talk to an entire table of people.
But you’re feeling some of the effects of it now, even quieter than usual in Eddie’s van as Gareth considers whether to paint or sharpie the Corroded Coffin logo Eddie designed onto the front of his bass drum. 
From the soft hum you’d given in greeting as you climbed into the van after school, Eddie had offered you his palm, open and relaxed. Now, your forefinger traces the long groove from his wrist to the base of his thumb that forms his life line. You love Eddie’s hands, love how they feel in yours, and on every other part of you they’ve touched. 
You swallow, face suddenly hot. It’s been easier, nicer, every time Eddie’s touched you. So much so that you now understand why it’s all some people think about, all that drives them. The way Eddie feels inside you, all the words that spill from his mouth as he moves; how much he wants you, how good you make him feel. You find your mind circling back to it at the strangest times. In class, making dinner, driving home with Eddie’s friends-
You jump a little at the chorus of bye’s from the back, the sound of the doors being thrown open. Eddie’s already watching you curiously when you look back to him, unable to hold eye contact, half convinced he’ll be able to read your thoughts with one good look at you. “You okay, sweet thing?”
“M’just tired.”
“Right,” Eddie says, nodding thoughtfully. “The guys- they can be a little intense.”
Mirth spreads through you at the thought of Eddie ‘jumps on cafeteria tables’ Munson describing anyone as intense. “I like them.”
“You say that now. A week tutoring Dustin and you’ll be changing your name and moving to Idaho. I’ll never see you again, and it’ll be all that little punk’s fault.”
“He’s your favourite.”
Eddie’s tone goes from playful to offended in a second, as to close a screech as his deep voice can get. “He is not- I don’t even have- Even if I did have a favourite, which I don’t, Dustin Henderson would not even come close-” He pauses at the sound of your laugh, narrowing his eyes. “Mmh. I get it. Tired, but not too tired to rile me up.”
You chew the inside of your lip, fighting a smile. Running a finger along his palm again, you reply, “it’s not particularly difficult.” You expect another dramatic yell of offence, or maybe a laugh. Instead, you get something pleased from his expression, dimples on his cheeks. “What?”
“Nothing. I just like it when you tease me.” His fingers close around yours, weaving together. “S’like you’re more comfortable around me, I guess.” 
You’re sure he’s right. Every day it’s a little easier. Every time you see him, your mind gets in the way less and less, slowly coming to accept that he’s not waiting for you to say the wrong thing, that he won’t abandon you when you inevitably do. 
“You make me feel comfortable, Eddie.”
“Yeah?” His eyebrows raise, waiting for your quick nod. “Does that mean you’re coming back to mine?” 
“Actually,” you start, truly needing that comfort now. You know the implications of what you’re going to ask, sure that if somebody other than Eddie heard you, they’d come to conclusions about the kind of girl you are. 
The more time you spend with Eddie the less you’re sure that it matters if they would be right or wrong. 
You press your knees together, tap your fingers in a wave along Eddie’s knuckles. “Well, my parents aren’t home...”
There’s a second of silence, long enough to have you squirming, finding his dark eyes and then looking away again in a loop. 
Eddie leans into you, chin tilted to capture your gaze and keep you there. “You mean to say that the Princess’ tower is unguarded this night?” 
Your stomach squeezes at the sound of his voice, serious and soft, like a real adventurer on the verge of committing himself to a great quest. You love this about Eddie, how easily he can slip into characters like this. It’s something he learned from DnD, or maybe Eddie’s so good at the game because he has this ability to play at being somebody different without hesitation, without a hint of the worry you’d feel if you tried it, convinced you’d do it all wrong, sure you’d sound stupid. 
“No dragons for me to slay?” He asks, closing one eye like he’s trying to work out if you’re tricking him. Your head shakes, and Eddie turns your hand in his to bring it to his mouth. He kisses your knuckles, a soft warm press. “S'that what you want?”
“Yes, Eddie.” 
“Okay,” he says, lips meeting your hand once again. “To the castle, it is.”
Eddie is as quick as usual to drive you home, each turn forcing you to lean to the door or to the centre console. But any urgency seems to vanish the second he’s pulled up by your house. In the van, you wait as he makes sure he has his wallet and his keys, sets the sun visor back into position. When you've jumped out, you watch him check that he's locked each door of the van with more care than you've ever seen from him, like he's particularly worried about a carjacker on your suburban street in broad daylight. 
Inside, Eddie is careful about unlacing his shoes and placing them at the door next to yours, toed off your heels carelessly. Then, at the top of the stairs, when you think you finally have him at a regular pace towards your room, you are jolted back by his sudden stop on the landing, leaving your hands connected at the end of stretched arms. 
“‘M looking for anything I can use as a weapon, you know?” He says, peering into a vase of fake orchids, examining a glass seahorse statue, scrunching his nose when he gets hit with the scent from a bowl of potpourri. “This all feels a little too easy, and you’ve gotta expect the unexpected in situations like these.”
“Eddie?"
You’re so endeared to him, watching him examine the objects your Mom set out playing up to this story he’s created. But the way he’s stalling, almost hesitant, has you sure you missed a clear sign along the way. “Eddie?” 
“Yeah?” 
“Did you, like, not want to come here?” 
His head shoots up then, round eyes blinking. “Of course, I did. I do.” Eddie laughs airily, tucking some of his hair behind his ear as he approaches. “I’m a freak, okay? I’m not crazy.” 
You still feel like you’re missing something, wondering if you should offer him another way out. Eddie makes a sweeping gesture with his arm, inviting you to guide him forward. Walking slow to give him time to change his mind, you make your way to your door, decidedly not looking back at him when you enter.
Eddie is unusually quiet, then, following you in but stopping once again when he takes the first step onto your cream carpet. You only glance back at him when you’ve dropped his hand and started playing with your sleeves, comforted by the fact he just seems to be taking everything in. He stands out, all ragged denim and black leather in the pastel softness of your bedroom, and yet he fits so well in a room full of things you love. 
He shifts his weight back and forth on the soft carpet, subtly sniffs the air that must smell of you and the apple blossom diffuser on your side table. His eyes drift as he takes in each focal point; the desk laden with textbooks and paper, your windowsill, lined with a couple snow globes, a ceramic cat you’d painted as a child, a framed photo of you and your friends Heather gave you for your 16th. He scans quickly over the cork boards to the corner of the room, smile lines appearing at the sight of your long favourite stuffed animal, a soft grey elephant you’d carefully positioned on a pink cord beanbag, looking ready to start reading judging by the pile of books to her right.
His gaze eventually circles back to you, waiting nervously for his reaction. Eddie shifts back and forth on his feet. “You know, I, uh, gotta admit, I imagined some stained glass.” He gestures lazily to the window, then to your bed, the wooden frame and the blue floral bedspread. “And I was sure you’d have one of those beds with all the fabric, you know what I’m talking about?” He raises both hands to motion the shape of a canopy bed, fingers wiggling. 
“Disappointed?” You say, only half joking. 
Eddie finally takes a step further in, turning to the shelves of books by your bed. “Me? Nah I was worried about getting tangled up in it, to be honest.” He flashes you a quick grin before scanning over the spines. Eventually, he points to one. “Iron Maiden, yeah?”
You check the book he’s pointing to, The Complete Poems of Samuel Taylor Coleridge, and nod, always pleased by the reminder that Eddie listens, really listens, when you speak. That he remembers so many innocuous things you share with him, things you’d never expect him to remember. 
You badly want to reach out for him then, fingers itching to hold his hand, play with his sleeves. You almost do, raising your arm a touch, but a wave of concern hits you, still trying to work out if you’ve done something, said something wrong to make him act like he’d rather not be here. 
Eddie catches your stunted movement, eyes blinking at your fidgeting hands before shifting to your face. You’re sure then that your anxiety is clear in your expression, that he sees how eagerly you’re waiting for him to give you an explanation for his hesitancy in the hallway.
Eddie frowns, looking at the books again. He clears his throat. "I've never been in a girls' room before," he tells you. From his voice, it sounds like a confession.
“Oh.” Your brows furrow, trying to work out how that matters. “I mean, they’re not all like this.”
"No, I mean, it’s just that it’s like, a first. For me.” When that doesn’t quite cover your confusion, he continues. “Nobody ever wanted, y'know, me in their room. Or whatever."
Your heart pangs with sudden understanding, the memory of Eddie lying across from you on a blanket, the warm sun on your skin. Am I being too intense? That's what Eddie had asked you, that day at the lake. People say I can be too much too soon. 
“And it’s already different, with you. Better. I mean, shit, a million times better,” he says, eyes wide. “But I still just didn’t expect you to, just, ask me, like- Like, you just want me here. Cause it’s never been that simple. Shit. I’m fucking this up, aren’t I?”
“No. No, Eddie,”
“I didn’t wanna make you worried or anything. It’s the complete last thing I’d ever want. I guess I was kinda just waiting for the other shoe to drop.” He laughs again, but it’s hollow, and cuts off too suddenly to be real. 
You give in entirely, practically launching at him to wrap your arms around his torso and pull him into a tight, desperate hug. You wish, not for the first time, that you were more like him, better at getting your thoughts into words and saying them.Then you could soothe him like he deserves. Then you could tell him the truth. 
Eddie’s face presses to your hair, arms tight around your shoulders. 
“Eddie,” you murmur into his shoulder, squeezing him again before you build the courage to look him in the eyes. “You’re so-” Your throat tightens, forcing you to whisper. “You’re so good.” It seems lacklustre, probably a million better words to describe all that Eddie is, but it feels right; it’s what you think, that Eddie is, deep at his core, so good that it hurts. “You’re too good, too good for anyone that made you think-” Your voice cracks, and Eddie blinks shining eyes at you when you reach up to stroke his cheek. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay,” he assures, pressing his face to your palm. “I’m okay. Really.”
You press your lips to his, hoping he understands this at least. You feel his smile, and believe that he does. He hums as you shift your kisses to the corner of his mouth, his cheeks. You peck the end of his nose, watch it scrunch sweetly. You’re warmed by the sight of his reddening face, the sound of his laugh. “You know how to make a guy feel appreciated, sweetheart.”
Your hands seem incapable of moving from him, only moving from his cheek to his shoulders, wrists tickled by the fluffy ends of his curls. “I want you here,” you say, a little strained. “I promise.”
“I know. I know you do.”
“I would have invited you earlier,” you continue. “It’s just…”
Eddie’s eyes flash. His hands, big and warm, rub up and down your back, pulling you closer to him until you’re flush against his chest. “It’s just, we couldn’t have done what you want to do,” he finishes. “Not with your parents downstairs. That’s right, isn’t it?”
Your stomach twists with that exciting shame, face hot. You don’t have anywhere to hide, caught by Eddie’s gaze. You still can’t look into his eyes for too long, lest your heart beat out your chest, so you find yourself staring at his lips, pillowy and pink. “Not just that.”
“Okay,” he answers, hand drifting down to skim the end of your skirt. You press closer to him when his fingers tease the soft skin of your thighs, and he breathes a laugh. “But, mainly that, huh?” 
Your fingers curl into his shoulders, embarrassed and excited in equal measure that he’s naming your intentions so clearly. You bounce a little on your toes, still gazing at Eddie’s lips, the dents of his laugh lines and his dimples.
Callused fingers reaching under your skirt, his thumb grazing the cotton of your panties, pulling at the elastic. You think you’re being subtle, the way you open your legs a little to make space for him, but know immediately that you failed when Eddie laughs, eyes crinkled at the sides. He breathes a sigh, watching you lose the last pretence that you aren’t a little desperate for him to touch you how he wants. “My good girl.”
Oh, but that makes you ache for him. Your head drops to his neck, hiding your face in his skin. You breathe him in, smoke and Eddie, swallowing a whimper.
“You like that, don't you? Like being a good girl.”
You nod on impulse, willing to agree to just about anything when his fingers drag over your mound, press to the split of your pussy through your panties, the material just grazing your clit. But something about what he's said isn't quite right, and you start shaking your head instead.
Eddie's mouth finds your ear, warm breath teasing the sensitive skin at the top of your neck. "No? Not a good girl?" 
You shake your head again, because that's not right either. You tilt your face to catch his gaze, ink dark eyes already waiting for you. "I like-" You sigh when his fingers catch at the fabric that sits at the top of your sex again, giving a single teasing circle that helps you relax enough to tell him the truth of it. “It’s for you, Eddie.”
"Ah," Eddie breathes, finally, finally dipping his fingers past the elastic of your panties. He hums his approval when he finds your clit, swollen and waiting for him. He gives you one tap just to see you pout, then he’s rubbing tight circles that have you trying to press even closer to him, nails digging into his shoulders. “My good girl, mm?" 
"Yeah," you nod desperately, proud to see how pleased he looks with you. "Yes, Eddie." 
"That's right." He continues, watching your face as your lips open to moan softly, eyelids flickering. His fingers dip quickly to your entrance, dragging slick up to ease the way for his fingers on your button. “Just for me. Cause I'm the one who gets to touch you," he says. "Only I get to hear you like this, yeah? Hear you begging me with that pretty voice?" 
"Only you. Please, Eddie." 
“S’cause you know I’m gonna take care of you, don’t you, sweet thing? You and this pretty pussy?”
Eddie's fingers keep rubbing at your clit, pulling sensations from your body that only he ever has. Staring at him, hearing his rough voice even as he looks at you like you’re precious, you feel it again, as you have with increasing frequency. How badly you want him like this and every other way. It almost overwhelms you, makes you want to hide away again in his shoulder. But Eddie is owed the sight of the pleasure he brings you, deserves to see it play out on your face, hear every whimper clearly. Eddie coos softly at the sight of you, his free hand coming to support the back of your neck, nodding you through each shaking breath. “That’s it. That’s it. You gonna cum?”
A tremble moves through your body, hips rolling against his hand as you groan into the air. The high builds to a long, half painful peak, your hands grasping at Eddie’s t-shirt, his hair, first for something to hold on to, then because the resulting groan has your cunt clenching around nothing. It crosses over into too much suddenly, twitching away from his hand between your legs even as you give in and throw your face to his neck, kissing your gratitude all over the pale column of his throat. You find his pulse, feel its steady beat under your lips, and bite. It’s little more than a scrape of your teeth, but Eddie shudders in your arms, tilting his head back to let you soothe the bruised skin with your tongue, then kisses. 
You sigh deep, relaxing your death grip on his body while Eddie kisses at your sweaty temple. You peek at him then, find the warm brown of his irises swallowed up by darkness, his tongue licking quick over his bitten dark lips. He pulls his hand from your panties, showing you the remnants of your slick on his fingers before licking at his ring finger. “Always taste so good, baby. Wanna try?”
“Uh huh,” you say, head fuzzy with pleasure. Your mouth drops open for him, letting him press his middle finger to your tongue. You close your lips around it, sucking gently. You don’t think it tastes of much at all, but Eddie seems suddenly desperate to get at what he’s given you. He drags his finger from your mouth and captures your lips before you’ve even registered the loss, his tongue licking at yours like he can steal the taste of you back. “That what you were thinking of when you invited me up here, mm?” He says when he breaks away, lips still grazing yours as he speaks. “Or do you want more?”
You do want more. You want Eddie. Want him filling you with the length you can feel, hardening against your thigh. You want to make him feel good, want to hear him groan when he cums. “More, Eddie,” you whisper without shame. “Please.”
“Fuck,” he breathes, leaning in for another desperate kiss, taking advantage of your pliant state to open your mouth to him. “Fuck. I wanna bend you over so bad,” he admits, watching your face for your reaction. “You want that? Want me to fuck you like that in your pretty princess bed?” 
Your toes curl, clit throbbing at the playful tone of Eddie’s voice, teasing and rough. “Mm. Okay.”
Eddie tilts his head, meeting your eyes, checking in. “Okay?”
You try to picture it, imagine how Eddie will feel fucking you that way. In truth, you’re stuck  on how vulnerable you’ll be; exposed, not able to see him or cling to him the way you like. But it’s Eddie, you assure yourself. You take a breath. “I want that, Eddie.” 
The kiss that follows is sweet. It’s a comforting reminder that no matter how much Eddie teases you, how rough he gets, he's still the boy who calls you princess, holds your hand in the car, promises to take care of you. 
He helps you remove your shirt from your heated skin, pulls his own over his head the second you start tugging at the hem. Once you have access to his skin, you can't stop touching him, palms flat to his chest, kissing his neck while he pulls your panties down over your hips. 
“C’mon, sweet thing,” he murmurs, turning you to face your bed. He kisses your shoulder, his body warm at your back. "Climb up for me, mm?"
You want to do what he says. You want him to touch you like this. But you still feel a prickle of nerves as you crawl up to your pillow, body exposed and missing Eddie’s skin already. 
“So pretty,” Eddie says above you, behind you, as you rest your chin on your curled arms on top of the mattress. You hear the clink of his belt, toes curling at the sound. Then you feel him through his boxers, hard and hot as he rolls his hips against your ass. You hear him whisper, shit, say something about protection. It's followed by a far off, satisfied a-ha at locating a condom in his discarded jacket, but it’s fuzzy beneath the sudden rushing in your ears. 
You feel him again, grinding against you, and you're not sure where all the excitement went. You’re staring at the blue cornflowers on your pillowcase while he continues behind you, remembering the last time you were positioned like this, tense and vulnerable. You try to breathe slow. When that doesn’t work, you try to let the heavy throb between your legs remind you how badly you want this.
It doesn't work, and you focus instead on feeling of just having to lie like this, get through it for him, just stare at the flowers and don't cry and he’ll be finished soon-
The pressure behind you disappears, the mattress shifts under you. Eddie bounces when he flops down beside you, face level with yours and hidden behind his flying hair. He makes soft puh noises like he’s trying to spit it out, blowing it away from his face. You blink, the white noise in your ears fading when you touch him, tucking his hair back behind his ear to find his grateful smile. 
“Thanks, baby,” he says. He reaches for your hip, rubbing soft as he presses your arched body down until you're lying, flat to the bed. Then, all heartbreaking gentleness; “where’d you go?”
You stumble, embarrassed. “I, I didn’t-”
“Stopped making those pretty noises for me," he reasons. “Isn't any fun without 'em." Your bottom lip shakes, and you feel like an idiot. 
Eddie. Eddie, Eddie, Eddie. Not Andy, not some boy here for himself, only to take and never give. 
"Hey," he says, shuffling in until he can bump your nose with his. "We don’t have to do it like this if you don’t want. You know that, right? Don't have to do anything you don't want.”
“It’s not that, I-” You sigh, watch Eddie’s shining eyes, round and soft, waiting for you. “I needed to know it was you. I’m sorry.”
Recognition registers in his face. He frowns, cupping your face in his palm. “No apologies. Not about what you need, okay?”
“Okay, Eddie.”
“Wanna cuddle?” 
You do. Desperately. You reach out for him easily, shuffling until you're surrounded by him, clinging to his torso, cheek to his chest.
"Ah," Eddie breathes, wiggling like he can get his skin any closer to yours. "That's the good stuff." 
You hadn’t realised how fast, how hard your heart was beating until you’re settled in Eddie’s arms and it starts to slow. There's a minute’s comfortable silence, letting his presence ease you back to comfort. Then he hums, strokes at the hair on your temple. "You gotta tell me when something's not right, ‘kay?" he says seriously. "I like to think I can read you pretty well, but I could've missed it." 
"I'm sorry," you say, then, remembering you just agreed not to do that, "sorry."
Eddie breathes a laugh through his nose, leaves a wet kiss on your forehead. "My shy girl, mm?"
"Sometimes it's just…hard to say what I'm feeling. I didn't want you to stop.” You hum. “I don't think I did."
Eddie considers that, still stroking at your hair. "Do you, uh, know what a safe word is?” You shake your head, and he continues. “S’kinda like a code. Something you can just say if you wanna press pause, you know? Means that instead of getting in that head of yours, trying to work out what you want, you can just say a word and we’ll talk about it, yeah?”
You consider it, imagining the scene if you'd been able to just say one thing and slow down. Easier not to have to think through what you need before you tell him, just say one word and let Eddie help you get there, coax from your head what you haven't worked out yourself. "That sounds good, Eddie." 
"Yeah?" He asks, eyebrows raising. “Okay. We can keep it simple for now. If we wanna stop completely, for any reason, we say red, yeah? If we need to slow down, talk a little about what we need, we say yellow. And green for keep going. How’s that sound?"
"Good," you say, feeling grateful that you’re learning all these things with Eddie. "It sounds good, but I- I am sorry that I'm, y'know. Difficult, sometimes."
Eddie blinks, eyebrows pulling together. "Difficult? My sweet girl? Nah. Besides," he leans in, closing one eye. "I like looking after you." 
You sigh happily when he kisses you, gentle and seeking nothing more than sweet presses. But you're still wet and wanting, hand rubbing across the softness of Eddie's tummy until your fingers draw across the sparse hair at the top of his pants. Eddie makes a noise in the back of his throat that has you pressing your thighs together. 
"You wanna turn over, mm? Open those pretty legs for me?”
Yes. You love having Eddie on top of you and inside you. Better every time, as your body gets used to him, as Eddie learns how to draw pleasure from you, as you learn what makes Eddie gasp, makes his hips move desperately like you're the only thing he needs. 
But you pause. Now, comfortable in the knowledge that you know how to slow down, stop when you need to, you let yourself imagine Eddie behind you. His hips hitting the back of your thighs, his big hands holding your waist, arching your body just right to slide inside. Letting yourself be vulnerable with Eddie, the feeling of offering yourself up to him, the reward of his touch.
“I want to try, I just, I need-” You don’t know, exactly. You feel another wave of irritation at yourself, wishing you could be a little more simple. That you didn't need to cling to him that first time, that now you need him to work out this hurdle. 
Eddie hums, and the mattress shifts again as he sits up behind you. “Lift these hips for me again, sweet thing?” He asks, helping you shift your knees forward, tilting your body up for him. You hear the crinkle of him tearing open a condom, his soft sigh as he rolls it down over his cock. “There’s my girl,” he murmurs, hands smoothing your skirt up, exposing your hot flesh to the air. You shiver up your spine, but when Eddie grinds against you, what follows is his torso stretched along your back until you can feel him pressing wet kisses to your shoulder. The tension falls away, replaced by the tickle of Eddie’s hair at your neck, his sweet sting of his teeth nipping your shoulder, the sound of his pleased hums.
A final touch, his left hand grabs yours on the mattress, linking your fingers up and resting them in your eyeline. You know Eddie’s hands better than you know your own. Thick fingers adorned with a pig, a cross, a skull; all pale skin but for the subtle pink at his knuckles and around his nails. The veins that run from the end of his fingers to his wrist, the dip at the end of his thumb. 
“Better?” Eddie asks. You hum happily. You’re so blissfully wrapped up in him like this, surrounded and safe. Eddie’s right hand teases your clit again, presses gently at your entrance and finds you still went and wanting, bearing down at the first dip of his digits inside you. “Fuck, don’t worry, sweet thing. Gonna give you what you need, mm?”
“Eddie,” you say, his name a gentle plea.
“I know,” he whispers, squeezing your hand in his. He reaches between your bodies to guide himself to your entrance, the head of his cock tapping torturously at your clit. You have half a mind to kick your legs out in impatience now, settle on whining at the back of your throat. Eddie breathes a laugh into your shoulder, but it shifts immediately to a groan as he presses inside. 
You’re still not entirely used to the feeling of him slowly filling you, the edge of pain still leading you to bear down on him, body stuck between desperations; to force him out or or pull him deeper. But then there’s the perfect ache of feeling full, the warmth and heaviness of him inside. 
Eddie’s hips roll, the wet sound of him pulling from you making your toes curl. He starts up a steady pace, easing your body into letting him slide deeper into your cunt with each thrust. His fingers return to the top of your sex, rubbing at your sensitive button. With every slow thrust, each stroke of your twitching clit, it feels like your body is opening up to him, easing the way for him to press deeper, push inside a little rougher. Your body flinches, tightens and loosens up all over when the end of his cock finds the back of your pussy, sending waves of pleasure up your spine. 
“Feel good?” He says, amusement in his tone. You moan freely, happy to be teased by him as long as he keeps touching you. “Tell me.”
“Feels good,” you parrot, staring at Eddie’s hand in yours, the slow movement of rose tone up his wrist, along to his knuckles as he heats up. You shiver to let in his warmth, his breath on your shoulder, his chest at your back. His cock, hot and thick, fucking you open.
“My good girl,” he murmurs, groaning at the way your cunt clamps down, gushing wet around his thick cock in thanks for his praise. “Christ. I shoulda known that was your favourite,” he breathes, his right hand pressing at your mound to angle your hips just so, helping his cock find the spot at the end of you that makes your thighs shake with every heavy push. “S’mine too.” 
His lips travel up the side of your neck to the top of your cheek, eyes finding yours when you turn to him. Eddie gives you a gentle pout at the sight of your mouth open to take gasping, whimpering breaths, your eyes fluttering when he starts to bully your clit in line with the increasingly harsh movements inside you. “You were fucking made for me,” he tells you. “You know that, don’t you, sweetheart?”
You cry out, arms giving way underneath you when your body twitches all over, squeezing tight around Eddie’s invading cock. Your head drops into the mattress next to your joined hands, but you nod desperately, wanting him to see that you know perfectly well. That nobody could make you feel as good as Eddie does.
Eddie keeps your body angled how he wants, adjusting your hips to pull your back into an arch. “All mine, aren’t you? Mine to look after, mine to touch. Mine to fuck-” He gives you a harsh thrust that makes your thighs twitch, legs close to giving out if he wasn’t holding you up with his arm under your stomach. “I wanna feel you cum, yeah? Think you can?” 
You’re still nodding, hand gripping his tight, fingers curled through his. 
“For me? Just for me?”
Always. Only for Eddie. You can’t say it, mind too far away to form the thought properly, but the feeling of him saying it like that, claiming your pleasure for himself as he drags it out of you with his cock, heavy and hot, and his hand playing with your clit, drives you over the edge. You mewl into the mattress, cunt clenching tight around his throbbing cock as your pleasure peaks.
Eddie makes a soft whimpering sound as you cum, following you down to bury his face in your shoulder. His hips move faster as he starts chasing his pleasure instead of focusing on yours, hand that was teasing your clit now stroking at your hip to soothe your sensitive, twitchy body. 
Hearing him now, gasping breaths, whimpers in your ear, you sink happily into this feeling. Almost as good as reaching your own peak, the knowledge that you’re making Eddie feel good. That this boy who treats you so well, dedicates himself to helping you find your pleasure, loses himself a little at the clench of your cunt around him.
You drag your clasped hands to your mouth, kissing at the pink skin of his knuckles. How could anybody not want this with him? How could anybody have given him up? You feel a sudden, desperate possession of him, the need to claim him like he claimed you.
“Mine,” you murmur, pressing your lips to the back of his hand in an array of gentle kisses. Your other hand reaches back to tangle in his hair, scratch at the back of his head as he whimpers. You crane your neck, searching for his eyes. They’re dark, shining as they take you in. His cock twitches inside you, and you squeeze his hand again. “Mine?”
His bottom lip shakes. “Yeah. M'yours. Yours, fuck-” He captures your lips but the kiss ends quick when he groans, hips stuttering in your warmth then sinking deep. You keep scratching at his neck as his body shakes through his orgasm, and still after when his weight drops on you and you fall flat to the bed together. You lie there for minutes, catching your breath, luxuriating in the feeling of being held by Eddie, pussy still clenching weakly around him.
Eddie hums, pulling from you slowly with another wet sound that makes you bury your face in your pillow. He rubs at your hip gently, squeezes your hand a final time before untangling from you to deal with the condom. You make a mental note to do something with that before tomorrow morning, but Eddie has your mind going wonderfully blank again when he bounces back beside you and pulls you in. You’re both a little sweaty, cheek a touch too hot against his chest, but you have no interest in cooling down if it means you have to stop touching him.
“Good?” He asks, fingers rubbing at your temple. You hum a long content sound in answer, not ready to form any coherent thought yet, and feel Eddie’s chest shake with laughter under your cheek. “Good.”
You lay like that, clammy and pleasured, convinced nothing could drag you from this bed.  Until you feel a quick pang in your stomach, and the quiet reverie is interrupted by a deep rumble. There’s a moment of silence, then Eddie snorts underneath you. You’d be embarrassed if his laugh didn’t make you want to follow his happiness, smiling shyly when he rubs gently at your tummy. “Hungry work, huh?” He asks, giggling. “Never fear, sweet thing. I can fix that.” He pauses then, licks his lips quickly. “Hey, you got a box of mac and cheese sitting around here, somewhere?”
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You flinch, watching with increasing horror as Eddie’s attempts to chop the onion you’d handed him. Fingers splayed and terrifyingly close the blade, you’re stuck between gently taking the knife from him and asking point blank how he’s managed to keep all ten fingers intact this long. 
“Do you want me to finish that?” You ask, frowning when he shakes his head, still fully concentrated on each dangerous movement, his tongue just poking out of his lips in a physical demonstration of his focus. 
If you weren’t so terrified, you’d be appreciating how soft and comfy Eddie looks right now. Black Sabbath t-shirt tucked into his jeans, socked feet ready to slide along your kitchen floor. His dark curls pulled back from his face and braided by your own hands, tied at the end with your favourite lilac scrunchie that you kind of hope he’ll keep.
But you can’t think about it, because you’re terrified Eddie’s going to ruin his musical career here in your kitchen, making pasta.
“No, need, sweet thing,” he assures. “This is a patented Munson technique for chopping onions.”
You could curse yourself for not having any boxed mac and cheese, for suggesting you cook something from scratch together in the first place. You’re used to cooking, with your Mom and Dad, with your friends, and eventually for yourself. But you get the sense that Eddie does a lot of microwaving, looking after himself the same way he has since he was a kid, at dinner time when Wayne is working nights.
“Eddie, can I?” You gently take the knife from him, turning the half of the onion left and chopping it with your thumb tucked in. 
He tilts his chin. “Lacks the adrenaline rush that comes with the Munson method,” he says when you’re done, watching you tip the contents of the chopping board into the heated pan on the stove. Then, a little sheepishly, “I, uh, I don’t cook much. If that wasn’t obvious.”
“You don’t like it, or?”
“I like this,” he answers. “And I make breakfast sometimes with Wayne. But not dinner, so much. He’s usually at the plant that time of day, so nobody ever taught me, I guess.” He pauses. “That’s not true. My mom and I used to cook, I think. Sometimes.”
You wait for a couple of seconds, watching the onions and garlic soften. “When you were a kid?”
“Yeah, we’d make stuff like this. Or, she would. I think I’d just watch mostly. Stir stuff, lick the spoon.”
“Best part,” you say, smiling. Then, watching him carefully. “Your Mom, she…?”
“She died,” he finishes with a shrug. He taps at the counter with his knuckles. “Then I lived with my old man, and he was not one for cooking lessons,” he laughs derisively. “Then one day the bastard dropped me off at Wayne’s. Best thing he ever did for me. Not that he cared either way, he was just sick of having me around.” Eddie finally looks at you then, and catches something in your expression that makes him wince, the laughter that follows clearly forced. “Christ, sorry. I’m really dumping on you today.”
“Don’t apologise, Eddie.”
“Nah, I shouldn’t have-” He shakes his head, tapping the counter again before resting his palms at the edge. “It doesn’t matter.”
“Eddie, of course it matters,” you say, turning off the stove to approach him, standing separated from his body by his arm reaching to the counter, keeping you from wrapping around him the way you want to. “Of course it matters.” 
Eddie shrugs again, and it’s another one of those moments where you wish you were more like him. Eddie always knows what to say, senses where you’re hurt and how to soothe it, knows when to talk and when to just hold you. 
But now that it’s your turn, you’re left feeling useless, stuck just wanting to cry at the thought that anyone has ever hurt him, made him feel like he has something to apologise for just for being around.
“I think you’re so wonderful, Eddie,” you say. “I want you around all the time.”
There’s a second of something. He turns to meet your gaze, searching your face with a frown. Then he gives you a small, barely there smile. The arm between you raises to let you close, wrap him up in a tight hug. You feel his body lose tension as he sighs, your hand stroking his back the way you know he likes. “I want you around all the time, too, sweet thing,” he says softly. “I really do.”
Next Chapter
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sc0tters · 9 months
Text
Your Best Listener | Ethan Edwards
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summary: Ethan learns about your biggest secret, but when you learn he knows. your reaction is better than expect, so what happens when you offer to lure him into it with you?
request: yes/no
warnings: sexual themes, blow job, p in v, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it!), consensual use of recording device, use of the word cum, soft choking (yes I very much so got carried away with this one)
word count: 2.7k
authors note: to the person who requested this, you are so creative! I hope that I’ve done it justice, I don’t know what you call someone who records sexual audios cause pornstar really didn’t feel like the right option. hoping this isn’t the last request you make though because I’m like in love with your mind.
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It had been on Ethan's mind for days.
It plagued his thoughts to the point where it kept him up at night staring at the ceiling as the voices in his head made him feel shame. He knew that the second he heard your voice he should have clicked off of the page, letting it go into the history of his laptop never to be brought up again. But when you let out a moan it suddenly caused Ethan to be sent into a whole different ball park. So rather than leaving, he stayed. The boy made a burner account so that you'd never have to know about what he was doing, so that it could be his little secret that he knew about what you did.
How he knew that you made sexual audios and posted them online.
Ethan realised that you had been doing this since just before the two of you moved to Michigan where you in fact became friends. He honestly had to say that he was shocked. You were the quiet girl who he had to bug for two and a half months before you finally spoke to him. The girl who would sit in the back of the class, the girl who would avoid pres because she hated small talk? That was you, so when he saw that you had racked up over 10,000 followers and over 100 clips that you recorded over the duration of your account, Ethan had to say that it was a nice surprise.
It was over a month ago that he learnt about this account and it made him laugh that you had a schedule even for this. The Canadian thought it was overkill when he learnt that you had your days that you did face masks, days that you shaved, and now days that you uploaded too.
Thursday at 7pm was when the new video would come onto your account, the only problem about this particular Thursday was that you asked him to hang out.
Sure he loved hanging out with you, it was something that he always looked forward to but on Thursdays Ethan wanted nothing more than to be sat in his room, under his warm sheets as he listened to your newest post.
You loved the power of intimacy that the account had shown you, how both men and woman alike enjoyed listening to you. The array of posts that you made were everything from mini role plays to your personal favourite where you were the listeners bossy little girl. You were naturally a total sub when it came to being in bed with someone else, so having the space to be dominant was empowering to you.
So when Ethan came over he was totally unaware of the fact that you were wearing one of your favourite outfits to record in. A matching blue lace set that had a gem in the center between your breasts. The reason why you had recorded one today was because you were going on a girls trip for the long weekend that was coming up and it meant that you weren't going to had time to record.
You and Ethan had been sat scrolling through the various movies that you had yet to view on Netflix as the clock struck 7.
The Canadian had been so caught up in picking the perfect movie that he didn't realise the time and as a string of notifications came through his phone he muttered a simple "can you check those for me?" The request was simple and innocent. And you already knew his password so as you lifted his phone up your eyes went wide to see what was said.
yourbestgirl has posted !
When you went quiet for an uneasy amount of time Ethan looked over your shoulder "shit," he mumbled as he realised that he had been caught out.
It was safe to say that you were embarrassed that he had found this but you wondered if he knew it was you "I should have told you that I knew about it," now that's a real what the fuck moment.
You had the moment to deny it but there was a burning question in the forefront of your mind "you ever gotten off to my clips?" You asked as you placed you hand on his thigh as you slowly began to rub up his leg, it wasn't a question that was far fetched as he had to follow you in order to get those notifications.
Ethan let his head drop back as he was surprised that you weren't freaked out by this "yeah," he repeatedly nodded as he unintentionally let out a whimper.
The hockey player wasn't one to be submissive but he seemed to enjoy those clips of yours the most "you like thinking of me as you get yourself off?" You were so forward because you were honestly turned on by this.
And after watching Ethan in the teams preseason efforts -especially the one by the football field where he lost his shirt at one point- you had started thinking about him when you recorded "so so much," he groaned as you were palming him through his shorts.
As he watched you smirk batting your eyelashes at him Ethan thought that he was going to pass out "thought about recording those clips with you." The Canadian confessed causing you to stop.
Throughout all of those recording sessions not once did you ever think about finding a partner to work with you. It was almost like you would have a special guest on the channel "you want to record with me?" You pulled away being serious in your question.
You had never heard of two people recording audios, this was a whole new ground of uncharted territory "only if you'd be comfortable with that." Ethan didn't want to cross anymore lines than he already had.
It was like a lightbulb had gone off above your head "we could make it like a threesome," the idea just fell from your lips as your filter seemed to quickly disappear as you two spoke about this.
Now you had never had a threesome before but you did know that it was a pretty simple set up. You and Ethan would play the happy couple and the listener would fit the role of your friend that walked in on you two. It almost meant that you actually be able to just do anything you were meant to do to the listener to Ethan instead.
The hockey player was almost touched by the proposal "something tells me that you've been thinking about this too," he smirked as he brushed some of your hair out of your face letting his fingers brush along your jaw before he leaned in to place soft kisses against your jaw.
You reached down to grab your phone as you let out a moan "e," you quickly went to type a message to your roommate "how long do you think we're gonna need?" You asked as you motioned to the message, you had already typed an hour.
Ethan looked at you as he sent you a glare "could make you come in ten," he shook his head "like to see you try," you shot back with a smirk.
It was like one of you recordings came to life "just let me know if you get uncomfortable or want to stop at anytime." Your voice was serious as you grabbed your mini microphone that you used to record. The long cable was thankfully still connected to your laptop meaning that all you had to do was press record "we've been wanting to try this forever," Ethan started by actually answering your consent request.
You smiled as you could see how he was a total natural in this "you think they can handle it baby?" You asked as you took your shirt off so that you could clip the microphone to the strap of your bra.
It was a sight that made Ethan swear that his dick was about to explode "go show what your mouth can do," he smiled as he leaned forward to kiss you.
It was a soft moment that made your knees buckle "you wanna be a good little listener?" You giggled as you dropped to your knees and began to unbuckle his belt.
Ethan clicker his tongue "play nice baby," he warned as he watched you drag your fingers along his boner. It was a sensation that caused him to tense his thighs "you're so desperate that I can't even tease you." You pouted looking up at the Canadian before you leaned down spitting on his cock as you began to use your hand to get him off "be a good girl and give him your mouth then." He repeated the phrase as he was desperate to feel your mouth on him.
Nodding you placed a kiss on the tip of his cock before you put it in your mouth.
Your tongue swirled around as you managed get to the base of his cock. Using your nostrils to breathe as your eyes began to water "being such a good girl for them," Ethan cooed as he ran his fingers through your hair as he helped you begin to let him fuck your face.
He let out a groan as he wiped one of the tears away from your cheek "it's all for my good little listener," you pulled away and as you spoke you made sure that your hand was making sure that Ethan wasn't lacking any type of attention before you used your mouth again.
It should have been embarrassing how fast he was reaching his high but you were beyond talented. You knew how to press your tongue flat against the bottom of his cock, how you would lightly massage his balls giving them the occasional squeeze, how you would take so much of his cock in your mouth to the point where you were gagging around it. You knew how to bring a boy to his knees in a matter of minutes.
That's why you felt so proud of yourself, your ego continued to be stroked by the boy as you caused him to reach his high "shit fuck fuck." Ethan repeated the string of words as he felt his body shake when his hands clenched around your hair forcing you to swallow everything that he had shot into your mouth.
You used your thumb to collect the drop of cum that was still on the head of his penis before you sucked on your thumb when you got up "I'm sorry," the hockey player apologised as he watched you smile.
Letting out a soft sigh you shook your head "that was so hot," you murmured as you kissed him.
Ethan let out a groan as he could taste himself on your lips causing you to make the mental note of editing the audio before you released this.
You softly pushed him onto your bed as you let out another giggle "you got a condom?" You asked as you saw that your box was empty.
That felt like the world was playing tricks on the boy "nope," Ethan groaned as he wanted to pull his hair out of his head.
Thankfully for you, you had seen your spare plan B pills that were still in your drawer "I'm on the pill and I've got these," you pointed out as you were happy with the resolution.
Ethan was now thinking that the day simply couldn't get any better "you sure?" He asked as he didn't want to make you feel uncomfortable.
You nodded as the idea of him fucking you raw was making your wetness pool in your panties "want you to fuck me so good," you mumbled as he kissed your stomach as he pulled your thong down.
Ethan moved you onto the bed as he sent you a final look asking if you were sure about what he was doing. You nodded dropping a gasp as he trailed his cock over your clit making sure to tease you "don't tease me please," a beg came from your lips as he slipped into you.
It took you a moment to readjust to his sheer size before you squeezed his arm motioning to him to start moving again "right there," you groaned when Ethan placed his thumb on your clit in an attempt to make you come quicker.
Yes Ethan was a man with an ego but he also knew when he was a man on the losing end of a battle. And fucking you raw whilst he was still sensitive from his first orgasm meant that he wasn't going to last very long "liking how warm my girls pussy feels." He grunted as he dug his fingers of his other into your side.
You let out a moan as you propped yourself onto your elbows "so good," you murmur before you kissed him.
The had that was on your waist moved to your throat as he pushed your back flat onto your bed as he put the slightest amount of pressure around your throat.
The boy was careful to not suffocate you as he didn't want to restrict your oxygen but rather slow the blood flow from your body to your brain sending you into that hazy mood "wanna be filled to the brim," you confessed as you wrapped you hand around his arm making sure that he didn't move his hand from your upper body.
You were truly on cloud nine as you were feeling so many new sensations due to the lack of a condom "got such a pretty mouth," Ethan's thumb quickened it's movements on your clit drawing another whimper from you. 
Locked your legs around his waist you couldn't help but let him be in total control "look at her so ready to come," he cooed as you squeezed around him making him groan "doesn't like letting you survive when she's close," he pointed out as the feeling of your pussy was similar to your mouth, warm and slick.
The access that you had given him was paying off as he got the chance to feel every crevice of your core "hitting you so deep," the hand that was on your clit moved to your stomach as he placed his palm down with pressure.
It caused you to nearly scream "gonna come," you announced as your own two fingers managed to find their way to your sensitive nub.
Ethan nodded "right behind you," you had been squeezing him so tight to the point where he could see stars.
You let out this cry "fill me to the brim." You barely got the words out before your orgasm hit you like a truck.
There was a gush that Ethan felt from your core before it loosened around him and that caused him to shoot his cum deep inside of you "Jesus gem," his hand fell forward onto the other side of you as he stopped himself from collapsing when he pressed stop on the recording.
You were absolutely fucked out as you struggled to keep your eyes open "I'm gonna get you a towel okay baby?" Ethan's words ended with a kiss to your temple that cause you to nod "did so good for me," he called out whilst in your bathroom.
He came back to see what could only be described as heaven. It was the site of your bare pussy as both of your releases slowly oozed out of you.
The warm wash cloth felt like an angels kiss as you let him do it "I should get going before she gets back." The hockey player mumbled as he handed you his hoodie sensing that you were cold.
That was what you didn't want to hear him say "new business partners spend the night," you shook your head as you leaned in to peck his lips.
This side of you was something that he could get used to "and when exactly did you establish this?" He asked as he slipped his boxers back on.
You sent him a playful grin "as of like thirty seconds ago."
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kathaynesart · 5 months
Note
I remember when you first started Replica and I haven't been here in a hot minute!
May you please do a debrief of what it is, the characters and their relationships.
I want to be able to give my friend (who I finally dragged down into this TMNT rabbit hole) a good explanation of your wonderful comic!
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Aw thank you so much! Hm… I suppose a summary would be good to have on hand. For the uninitiated with no context, here is the basic elevator pitch:
The year is 2044 and the last remaining Resistance of Earth has just fallen to the alien invaders known as the Krang. In a last ditch effort to save the planet, Casey, a freedom fighter is sent back in time to undo the events that first led to the invasion. While he is ultimately successful in his mission, the state of his original fallen timeline remains unknown. The last of the freedom fighters, his family, perished to ensure his safe escape, leaving their world to the mercy of the Krang.
Which brings us to the ultimate question: when you already know the heroes are doomed to fail, what can be gained from being told their story?
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For the rest below, I’m going to write with the assumption that the reader has some basic knowledge of the series and the film because I feel that this story is best enjoyed with proper context.
SUMMARY
Replica is a story meant to answer many of the questions the first 4 minutes of the movie left us wondering. It’s to explain the basic history of the bad future timeline and how it came to be. The plot focuses particularly on the later half of the apocalypse, all with the intention of leading up to the opening scene where the Krang wins and Casey Junior is sent back in time to fix the mistakes that Leo and his family could not.
It’s to answer questions like:
How did Leo get injured?
Why is Mikey so old looking?
What were these characters like in the future?
What happened to Raph, Donnie, and April?
Where is big bad Krang Prime in all this?
How did the Resistance finally lose to the Krang?
Did they plan to send Casey back in time in advance?
What happened to this world/time-branch after Casey Jr was sent into the past?
MAIN CHARACTERS
For the most part, the cast is comprised entirely of characters from the series. My goal is to keep this as canon as possible, so no new OC's... save for one (kind of).
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Omega Bootyyyshaker 9000 is where this story starts and ultimately where it ends. He is a brain scan AI of Donatello, created to act as both a support system for the Resistance after the turtle’s untimely death and also a key component in a plan that will hopefully put a stop to the Krang should the Resistance fail. Omega is great because he adds some much needed levity to the story, acting a bit more like the aloof but silly teenage Donnie (a side affect of not having to experience the usual physical weariness that comes with being an organic, aging organism in an apocalypse). However, he also adds more weight by being the thing that is supposed to outlast all of them and act as the last line of defense for the remainder of the universe. He claims to merely be a "replica" of Donnie's mind, but whether he's just a digitized scan, his own AI person, or somehow connected to Donnie in a deeper way has yet to be seen.
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Leonardo Hamato: the man, the myth, the legend. Casey Junior spins tales of how great his sensei was in the movie, but in this story we really get to see Leo go from his lowest point as a pawn for the government, crushed by the shame of his past actions, to his greatest height as the leader of the Resistance. He is going to fail a lot in this story... but ultimately his greatest success is overcoming his own inner demons and coming to terms with being the father figure he had never asked to be. He cares deeply for his family and Casey... but he thinks he'd be a horrible dad.
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Michelangelo Hamato: the only other surviving turtle to see the end of the world. He is the emotional bedrock of the family and a stand in therapist when he's not being a silly little guy. His mystical powers are unparalleled, but in his attempts to regain his lost Ninpo he taps into something far deeper, leading them down a path that intertwines the destiny of their doomed future and a past that has yet to occur.
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Casey Jones Jr: a sweet boy taken in by the Hamato family. He strives to become a great warrior like his mother (Cassandra) and his Sensei (Leo). We are going to watch him grow from child to teenager as he slowly takes on the roll of being a fighter in the resistance. Through it all he must walk an unsteady line that allows him to find the strength to weather the storm but retain a certain spark of hope that helps keep his family going.
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April O'neil: Commander of the Resistance and another honorary Hamato family member. She is the voice of reason and most emotionally stable of the family. Even after dealing with so much loss, she keeps a stiff upper lip as well as cold and calculating mind that always puts the colony's wellbeing first and foremost.
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Donatello Hamato (deceased): The story begins shortly after Donnie’s passing during an infiltration mission against the Krang. He was dead set on planting a probe behind enemy lines that would allow them to spy on the Krang’s movements. However it seems that he had a secret agenda in planting something that would work as a final doomsday weapon against the Krang. What that is exactly, we do not yet know. The man self-destructed in a last ditch effort to avoid being interrogated by the Krang as well as a final attack to injure Krang Prime.
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Raphael Hamato (deceased): The eldest brother who sadly passed away many years ago in the fight against the Krang. A boisterous but considerate man whose death sapped a great deal of the fighting spirit out of his brothers. His absence is greatly felt, but he might not be as far gone as he seems.
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Krang Prime (One): Our big bad of the story. He is the leader of the Krang that has latched onto this planet like a cancer, using up its resources and assimilating its population. However, unlike the hundreds of planets that have come before this one is particularly personal. He doesn't want to merely assimilate but utterly destroy the descendants that caused his imprisonment thousands of years ago. His current state is unknown after being last seen with Donatello at the time of the man's self-destruction.
NEED TO KNOW DETAILS
All Resistance fighters have tiny self destruct bombs in their brains so that the Krang can not probe their minds to find out the Liberty Colony's location. They go off automatically after Krang infestation reaches a certain percentage, but can also be set off via voice command.
Donnie's brain bomb was far more potent because of the amount of information he knew. He did not want to risk the Krang getting any part of his mind.
The Krang have been searching for the resistance in a frustrating game of cat and mouse which has only become more difficult now that the Resistance easily knows their every move by using Donnie's probe.
Central Park Colony: now destroyed, but was once the last massive human colony in North America, housing both the EPF (Earth Protection Force) and US Government. Racism was a huge problem as most yokai and mutants were either quarantined, tested on, or used as living weapons in the fight against the Krang. It has since been destroyed.
Liberty Colony (aka the Resistance): grew from the ashes of the Central Park Colony. It is comprised of the survivors and lead by Leonardo, April, and several others. It is much smaller and more militaristic, but treats yokai, humans, and mutants equally.
Artificial Intelligence (like Omega and Shelldon) are able to fend off the Krang assimilation that people and tech would normally succumb to. It is for this reason Omega is used as both a protector of the Liberty Colony and operator for a majority of the vehicles so that the tech can no longer be easily taken over by the Krang during attacks.
Leonardo and Michelangelo (as well as Donatello's) Ninpo have all been stripped from them by this point in the story. While Leo can not tap into his family connection at all, Mikey at least has regained the ability to use some of his mystic powers.
Mikey's mystic abilities however come at a price. Since he can not tap into his Ninpo and the fountain of energy from his ancestors, he is instead using his own life force to cast his spells. It is slowly draining him.
TIMELINE Can be viewed HERE
SOURCE MATERIAL The video that inspired this all can be viewed HERE
Hope this helps! Sorry it's a bit long, tried to break it up with images. At least there might be a few interesting bits of information other readers may not have noticed. I snuck in a few things that haven't been mentioned yet, hehe.
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youresodarkbabe · 23 days
Text
curtains closed (a. turner x reader)
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smut.
warnings: oral (m recieving), sub!al, reader gets called momma a lil bit (like once, maybe twice), somno, idk anymore help
word count: 1.2k
for @goblinontour my fav fetus al enjoyer !! also 2 blowjob fics in a row... something's wrong with me </3
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"i'll be a few hours, baby, 'm sorry."
alex sighed at the comment— he needed you now. you had left home at ten in the morning, while he was asleep, it was around half past twelve in the night now, he wasn't able to see you at all. he missed you, rightfully so.
"but i can't wait a few hours!" he whined, you had to stop yourself from laughing as you could hear the pout in his voice.
"i'm sure you can last, al, i have faith in you."
he, however, knew better than to trust himself.
as you spoke, he palmed himself through his sweatpants, finishing himself off in his fist after you hung up. he cleaned up after and tucked himself back into his boxers and went about his night as usual, turning on an old movie to fall asleep to, which is exactly what he did. you were enamored by the sight that greeted you when you walked into your shared bedroom, alex with one of his hands in his boxers and another in his shirt, he looked like he had been playing with his nipples— you found it cute. pathetic, yes, but torturously cute.
you'd fuck him right there if you could, it was a shame that he was asleep. all you wanted was his cock in your mouth, you craved it more than anything after such a strenuous day, and you were going to get it.
"alex, baby, 'm back." you murmur as you litter kisses all over his face and neck. he whines quietly and you feel yourself wanting him more by the second. your fingers graze against his soft cock in an attempt to wake him up, only leading to him whining again.
you nip at alex's neck as your hand slides under his shirt and finds his, replacing it and playing with his hard nipple, your kisses moving down his body. "c'mon, puppy, you said you were gonna wait up," you whisper against the skin of his lower stomach, the feeling of the trimmed hair rubbing against your nose somehow making you feel even more eager to take him down your throat. "but i'm tired, momma," his voice comes out hoarse and desperate as his back arches into you and your hands push his shirt up so you can maneuver it off of him, he helps as much as he can without drifting away from his sleep.
"d'you want me to help you feel good? 's that what you need, baby?"
he moans a soft 'yes, please' and you can't help but enjoy how his accent somehow grows stronger; partly due to his tiredness, also due to how badly he needed you.
and soon enough, he'd have what he wanted.
you slide his black boxers off and pry his hand away from his soft cock, you always loved when he was like this. he could wrap a bow around his soft cock and present it to you as a gift and you'd be grateful to him forever.
you kiss his cock softly, holding the base in your hand as you press your tongue flat against his tip, swirling it around as your hand starts to stroke him slowly, exposing the head which you take into your mouth and suck on, your eyes fluttering shut as you focus on every sound coming out of alex's mouth. one of his hands instinctively go to your head and weakly try pushing it further down, making you laugh around his cock, which sends vibrations all throughout his body, making him groan deeply, hips bucking into your mouth.
your eyes water slightly as you feel him harden in your mouth, stretching your lips and making them sting. still, you pushed through the pain and try taking as much of him down your throat as you can before pulling off and spreading all the precum that had been leaking from him all over his now half-hard cock. you kitten lick the tip again before going to lick a stripe up from the base til the tip, your tongue digging into the slit as you look up at him and see what you'd consider heaven— alex with his hair a spiky mess, lips rosy red and parted, repeating your name like a prayer, and his now half hooded eyes which showed his tiredness and his pure need. he was enjoying himself thoroughly and it boosted your ego immensely to know you gave him this much pleasure.
even in his sleep, alex was so responsive for you. every kiss, every touch, every stroke, every lick; you got a reaction out of him. whether it was his mouth falling open, his hips bucking or him moaning your name, a reaction was practically guaranteed with him. he was always so sensitive and at this point, he was used to expressing how you made him feel for you. you've turned it into a habit for him, one you've both grown to enjoy.
you leave kisses along his lower stomach as your hand strokes him, quickly moving up for a peck on the lips and then taking your time to make your way back down, practically running your face down his body and kissing as much of his neck and chest as you can, leaving marks wherever possible. by the time you're back at his cock, you decide you haven't played with him enough, so you massage the inside of his thigh with your free hand and quickly nip at the pale skin, making him yelp and his eyes flutter open as he looks down at you pleadingly.
your body settled between his thighs again, nails grazing along his skin as you finally take his cock into your mouth again. he was achingly hard for you, and so painfully close.
managing to get a hold of himself, he decides to look down at you, the second his gaze met yours, he couldn't hold back any longer.
still half asleep, alex was barely registering how loud he was as he came, filling your mouth up completely. his knuckles turned white from how hard he was gripping onto the sheets and your hair, and you're positive you bruised his little waist with how hard you held onto it while trying to still him.
after swallowing as much as you could, you pull off, pressing a quick kiss to his inner thigh and get up, leaving the room to change and leaving alex alone with his desperate thoughts. you coming back wearing your (his) shirt didn't help either.
you get into bed with alex and hold him close. you two talk for a little while, you recount your day and he tells you about his and when the conversation dies out, you shut your eyes, expecting to go to sleep fairly quickly when you're disturbed by his timid voice.
"can i return the favour?", he asks as he kisses your neck softly, one of his hands slipping under the shirt to wrap around your lower back and pull you closer to him.
you contemplate this. you wouldn't mind letting him return the favour, but you were incredibly tired and craved rest.
"not right now, baby. but you can wake me up like that tomorrow if you'd like?"
alex was unable to go back to sleep for the rest of the night.
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