#internet sucks today

[aimless-passerby]

Today everything is so laggy, ugh.

Wanted to make smth for furaffinity in one go, but overestimated my abilities.

And I couldn't find a mythological creature that would live in wells, so for this idea it's just an early stage of Gollum-ifiction.

#my stuff #internet sucks today #I'd like to head off in lotro #also mysophinia is terrible #everything is so loud here #tired #need somehow to add something positive to these posts of mine #let me remember if there any #hmmm hmmm hm #not sure #still upset about poor feedback in galleries #but I shouldn't focus on this #unhealthy stuff #anyway I will tag everything later #net's laggy #o I can block taylor swift on tumblr sdfhjkasd #what is she doing here #stupid support team didn't answer me yet #busy ruining tumblr ui further I guess #every social media is in shambles

[filez34]

Eclipse gonna get batoned

#fnaf sb #daycare attendant #fnaf sun #sundrop #fnaf eclipse #fanart #i was in sunny mood today :) #my internet connection sucks #fil draws #fnaf dca #dca fandom #fnaf daycare attendant #sun x yn #eclipse x yn #fnaf yn

[iwonderwh0]

Here’s a take

And let for a moment ignore the dbh and think of androids in general, in a more realistic way

Humans don’t hate androids because they are “perfect” or some shit like that

But because they exploit human emotions and turn human sympathy and compassion for each other into a vulnerability.

Now on how exactly androids poison human connection by mimicking it. Think of how corporate world exploits positivity and makes it toxic, uses major key music and bright colours, smiles at you with a big smile while not actually being friendly or caring about you, something that a lot of people grew so sick of that being unapologetically unfriendly and grumpy became kind of an attractive trait that in comparison feels GENUINE. So what happens when a corporation becomes so good at imitating human connection that you can’t even tell the difference? You become suspicious to other people.

You see genuine human interaction through the prism of constantly comparing it with androids. You start to pick up the exact things androids mimic and start to run new versions of Turing’s test on everyone.

Imagine being fired from your job by what looks like another human, a pretty one, that looks genuinely sorry. Genuinely sympathetic. And what’s worse – you fall for it. You leave feeling this sympathy and only when you start to think about it logically as opposed to emotionally (you just got manipulated), you realise that no real human even cared enough to talk to you personally. Not only you got fired, your company manipulated you into thinking that they still genuinely care about you. The resentment that will grow in you the longer you think about it will only be amplified with each “genuine” android you see.

Now when you see another beautiful human you can’t even appreciate their beauty because they are too much like an android. People who are pleasant to be around suddenly make you feel uncomfortable because they are a little too much like androids. And the more “genuinely-looking” androids get, the less genuine humans who do the exact same thing will look in comparison. Their behaviour will be subconsciously registered as an attempt to manipulate.

Now, think of millennial “grumpy” response to toxic positivity multiplied by ten, the one that spreads into each human interaction you have. Everyone is a test subject. Nothing is genuine. When it looks like it is –you are being manipulated into liking someone who isn’t even fucking real. Suddenly being near assholes becomes weirdly comforting, because at least you can be sure that this is real. As a protest to androids becoming better at imitating love, you start to sparkle your casual interactions with hate. It becomes new way of assuring your humanity, authenticity, your real life “I’m not a robot” badge that you exchange with other people that are equally testing you for authenticity as you are testing them.

And living in a society where you subconsciously start to view interactions as only genuine when they are expressing negative emotions (to be more specific, egoistic and hostile ones) — this is hell. It will make you miserable. It will make you hate androids for stealing something so precious you didn’t know it could be stolen. And seeing people who fall for this emotional trap every time, going as far as defending androids, preferring them to real people — will only make you angrier. And there is nothing you can really do with this anger either, other than to gradually become more and more hostile towards the androids and the people who defend them.

Sure, you hate the company(ies) responsible for androids, but you don’t interact with their representatives every day – you interact with androids. The product. And under this angle, will people hate androids? Yes. Yes, they will. And if you are not delusional, you’ll learn to hate them as well. The hatred is justified, as androids are the walking embodiment of a dark pattern*. It’s not about them “stealing jobs” (company executives made a conscious decision of “optimising” their businesses), it’s not about them “being perfect”. It’s far deeper than that.

* dark pattern is basically psychologically effective manipulative design. As an example – infinite scroll, gambling games, fake close buttons that make you click the ad, etc.

#androids #I’ll tag it as #dbh #just because it is kinda relevant within the context of my blog #but PLEASE don’t start discussing npcs behaviour in responses if you’ll want to response #dbh was written in a way that practically ignores the existence of the internet and makes androids as a parallel to slavery #it fucking sucks #I’m talking about androids in a more realistic scenario of extrapolating the AI we deal with today #if you start to talk about how Connor is special under this post I’ll curse your ass thanks 🙏

[derpinette]

when i exchange a message whether i receive or send one i have to immediately shut off my device & walk some laps for a few minutes to shake off the adrenaline rush

#i try to forget that ever happened so i can relax because otherwise i get heart palpitations & headrush my uterus drops ETC #so i have to stay off of whatever site i just used for like an hour but now i have messages sent+received on every app #i can only escape to yourube & it sucks #also even anonymously i exit out of the thread/tab & ignore that tab for as long as it takes me to forget #& then i check back on the replies hours later or days even despite not ever posting bait i just get nervous #( but not always... خلّي أيامك أحلى ) #currently hamster walking everywhere in my house & it took me a day to reply back ( was too busy agonizing ) #could have been a month like last time. or year like the other two times before. IDK why i even bothered #WHEW #that one screencap i already posted before with the courage the cowardly dog picrel Shockingly not posted by me #but i might as well have i do the exact same thing & when people are nice to me i ride that high for a week if not more #the high i got from crushing it at scribbl with randoms in 2020 i rode for like two years & then the *** livestream in 2022 #i am still riding today & ALWAYS WILL best days of my internet life for Serious look forwards to it annually cured me completely #from suicidal ideation. THANK YOU WOMEN. ^_^

[whumpacabra]

The Target

Angst, back from the dead, memory loss, amnesia, guilt, implied past abandonment, referenced past captivity and torture, referenced past illness, therapy mention

[Directly follows Tea]

The set up was cliche for a reason: it worked. No fancy equipment, as few moving parts as possible, and complete deniability. Jackson had taken the target to a small tea shop in the heart of the city. Crowded but not too busy. Bribing the waiter to sit the pair behind her table was easy.

The hard part was resisting the urge to turn around and look at him -

(She needed to be patient. Even if it was her Wolf back from the dead, she wasn’t sure her presence would be soothing.)

(…)

(If it was her Wolf, if Ghost had left him for dead, if he had survived all these years - would he hate her? Would he forgive Ghost?)

“You’re looking well, East.”

“Thanks. Helps to not be half dead and sick as a dog.”

The voice was…wrong. Too gravelly, too low - the accent though, the cadence of his words…oh, how desperately she wanted to believe it was him. A waiter brought her the tea she had ordered, creamy and warm and sweet. She didn’t have the stomach for it, thinking about the target behind her.

“I’m sorry I haven’t been around lately. I know it must have been a…rough adjustment.”

The man behind Liza scoffed.

“It’s been…an adjustment, to be sure.” He sighed, voice softening. “But I’m…doing better. Thanks to you - ”

“Oh, don’t you dare give me credit. That’s all you. And Nate, of course. I just dropped you at the door and left.”

“You didn’t have to. Help me, I mean.” East clearly meant to elaborate, but a waiter came by to take their order. Liza forced herself to swallow a few sips of her drink. She told herself she didn’t shiver at his coffee order - it didn’t mean anything, anyone could enjoy black coffee and four sugar cubes without milk.

“Speaking of, helping you, how’s Judy been?”

“Helpful.” The word was clipped and professional, but East worked some levity into his voice as he continued. “Starting to feel like a real person again.”

“I’m glad.” The warmth in Jackson’s voice almost took Liza off guard. So sickeningly tender and genuine. “You have no idea how relieved I am that you’re - ”

He cut himself off, their drinks served by an unwitting waiter. There was the clatter of tea cups and coffee mugs and sugar stirred with honey.

“Careful, it’s hot.”

“I know - it’s still good.”

“How can you tell with it burning your tastebuds off?” Jackson’s amused huff and East’s chuckling sigh only made the pang of nostalgia all the louder in Liza’s heart. Wolf (her Wolf) never waited for his coffee to cool; too impatient to wait - he always claimed it tasted worse once it cooled to a drinkable temperature.

“I’m glad you’re back, Jackson.” East’s voice was still warm, but there was a tension under his words. “How have you been? Is everything…alright?”

“Fine. I’m doing just fine - happy to be home, if I’m quite honest.” Jackson’s reply was immediate and open, but dreadfully vague. “Everything’s just fine.”

Liza couldn’t see East’s reaction behind her, but whatever it was compelled Jackson to continue. She could almost see him, in her mind’s eye: her Wolf…a decade younger, face pinched in worry - always worried - and eyes bright with determined preparation for every scenario.

“Things are dying down. Americans are keeping to themselves for once, and it’s looking like a cold case.” Jackson’s voice was almost too quiet to hear, but Liza could practically feel the tension bleed from the man behind her. “Almost out of the woods - just some finalized paperwork and seals of approval.”

“And what happens…after?”

Liza stared down at her tea, trying to picture it. The great and terrifying Ghost - who swore off apprentices after losing his first, his last - being told the man that was practically his son had survived. (Had been abandoned.) Wolf - who went through a hell at the hands of the enemy, who spent years abandoned and alone - survived and he could come home. (To a stranger in his room and the dog he loved long dead.)

(Her one regret in her life burned bright in her throat - oh, how he would have loved to meet Casey. How different things could have been if Wolf was around to protect her boy.)

“After…we get you home.”

“Which is?” East (Wolf?)’s whisper was hoarse, laced with a sad desperation that broke Liza’s heart. Jackson had told her he might have - she didn’t really think, she hoped -

(She was a fool, always blinded by hope and it’s empty promises.)

“I - I thought you said things were going well with Judy - ”

“Nevermind. Your tea’s getting cold.“ It was like a switch had flipped, words suddenly steady and strong. Whatever fledgling hope Liza had that this was her Wolf, that he could come home, died in her chest.

(Wolf hadn’t had a home to come back to in along time.)

“Hey, I just - East…it’s fine. We said it would probably take some time. We’re not in any rush - ”

“You seem to be.” There was a thin bite to the words, defensive but still smothered in that muted parody of nonchalance. “I don’t know. I don’t really want to. It sucks to think about. I thought maybe you…figured something out that I couldn’t.”

“East…love, I - ”

“It’s fine. I like my job. I like my friends. Think Al and I might get a flat together - rent’s too high to not have roommates in this economy.” East’s sigh was decisive, a harsh swallow before he continued. “I just - God, fuck - I like my life right now. And I don’t want to leave it all behind. But I know - I don’t know - what you need or, or want me to do in return for - ”

“Nothing. East, I’m not here to take you away I just - I didn’t know if you had somewhere else you’d rather be. But, if you’re happy here…I don’t see any reason for you to leave.”

“Really?”

(Why did the relief in his voice sound so much like a nail in the empty coffin they buried for him?)

Liza wanted to get sick; she stood up a bit too quickly, chair bumping into the man behind her. She pulled on the mask of a stranger, perfect and apologetic and calm, and looked a dead man in the eye.

“Oh my gosh, I’m so sorry - ”

“No worries.”

Her heart dropped to her feet, his polite glance failing to betray recognition, even though she knew that face and those eyes so well, even a decade removed -

(He looked so much older than she remembered him. Tired. Contented. Scarred and worn by time and it’s ravages. Where was the soldier more boy than man she remembered? Where was his fiery eyes and burning passion? Where was his fight?)

(…)

(Was it better, she wondered, for him to live a life without that fight, that fire in his heart? God knew how it had burned her and everyone else who knew him when it was snuffed out.)

Liza took her leave, heart in her throat.

—

“Did you - ?”

“I don’t know him. This was a waste of my time.”

“I’m sorry - ”

“I’m sure you are.” Liza let her voice soften as she looked out at the rain hitting her hotel window. She sighed into the phone, speaking before she could regret it. “Agent Jackson?”

“Yes?”

“I don’t know this Wolf of yours, but it sounds like he’s having a pretty good life.” She almost paused, almost stopped to consider telling him the truth before deciding better of it. Liza was far more comfortable in a lie. “Don’t fuck it up looking for something he doesn’t need found.”

“���Thank you, Liza.”

She snapped the phone closed, and closed her eyes, remembering the face she knew on a man who didn’t know her.

It wasn’t worth unburying that empty casket. It wasn’t worth uprooting a good, clean civilian life. It wasn’t worth opening old wounds. Wolf was dead, as he had been for a decade. Liza needed to make sure he stayed dead, and that East stayed alive and well and untainted by the world he left behind.

[Before Smoke Break]

(Part of my Freelancers: Changing Tides series)

Taglist: @stargeode @sacredwrath @genuineformality

#whump #angst #back from the dead #memory loss #amnesia #guilt #abandonment #past torture #past captivity #past illness #therapy mention #freelancers #*squeezing Liza like a squeaky toy* her track record for deciding she knows what’s best for people in her life sucks so bad #but she keeps doing it because she cares too much to let anything be anyone’s fault but hers. #and east…oh east. this is just a random Tuesday for him. it’s the last time she’ll see the face of her friend and he doesn’t even know it. #I am unwell abt my own ocs. *autism creature stare* I just think they’re neat. #in other news it’s [redacted] today so. worst case scenario I’ll explain whatever the fuck keeps me away from the internet #whenever I can get back. best case scenario nothing happens and life goes on as usual for my blog schedule here. o7 #regardless just gotta get through the week and I’ll have a better bead on the risk level we’re looking at. #personal rambling done. mwah I love you people who read my goofy tags.

[that-starlight-prince]

There are some things that are bad. But never forget that there are also some things that are good

#e.g. today sucked #and yet there are people who will let me meow at them on the internet. so maybe all is not lost

[vee-is-a-clown]

Voltron x Pokemon au but all the characters are pokemon and not trainers. What is everyone? I want to start discourse.

#If I already posted about this today then comment saying that #I tried posting this hours ago but I don't see it and my internet sucks rn #I'm making a Pokemon trainer au but I'm just curious #voltron #vld #vld au #Voltron au #pokemon au #keith voltron #lance voltron #shiro voltron #pidge voltron #hunk voltron #coran voltron #allura voltron #romelle voltron #lotor voltron

[fanfoolishness]

When you wake up horny but your spouse has to go to work to launch a space rocket instead of the sexy sort, so you are le sad

Then you realize you’re just in a foul mood regardless and try to distract yourself with art

(Newsflash: it does not work and you hate everything, and sure now you have more prints but you hate all of them)

Then you think maybe you’ll distract yourself with things that need the internet, only to realize your WiFi is utterly completely dead and has been all day

So you try to reset what you think are the router(s)??? (Why does this always happen when husband, who does this stuff, is gone) Except now not only is your network not working but it is just Gone and no longer even discoverable by your devices (now you have a creeping sense of dread you have created much more work for husband)

Then you remember husband also has the home lights all set to work with WiFi

And it was a 14 hour rocket launch shift so now it’s your bedtime and he’s still not here, and you can’t turn off the lights with your phone like normal, but if you turn them off manually, he won’t be able to see anything when he comes home, so you are going to bed with half the lights on so he won’t trip and die when he gets home at 2 in the morning

And you usually fall asleep to streaming reruns, but remember: no internet, so it’s just silence and you aren’t sleepy at all even though you have to be up in the morning

And basically everything is very stupid and you hate everything and everything is the worst.

#it’s been a very stupid day and everything is pointless #I’ve just had anger tears leaking out of my eyes half the fucking day #it’s been powerful dumb #and I am very tired of whatever the fuck mood swing this is #oh and I still have no idea what’s going wrong in the last chapter of my fanfic and didn’t work on it at all today #because it’s on google fucking docs because I suck!!! and it would need internet!

[sexygaywizard]

Given that the person who is running the poor little meow meow contest has statistical evidence that the Vriska polls are being botted and 95% of the comments and tags on the Harry/Vriska poll are in support of Harry, even if he loses, we will know who the real winner is and so I won't be too sad about it--- but I am sad about it because I want to be able to see the numbers behind how hard Harry is actually sweeping right now because i KNOW my mans is SWEEPING

#the post with the evidence of bots is really long and i've already put a lot of posts about the poll up today #so i'll just put it in the comments of this post in case people want to see it #but like harry vs howl was a legit match-up and a true fight #a niche character that people were intensely passionate about vs an extremely well known and popular character #and the comments and notes were fairly even altho hdb fans were clearly more intense about it #but there is like barely anybody in support of vriska in the current poll or any of her previous polls #it's sad!! #even most of the homestuckies i've seen recognize hdb as the better candidate #tbh this is just going to make vriska stop getting put in polls which sucks!! #boo on u loser who is using bots. ruining it for everyone #it's literally an internet poll why are you doing this :( #i talk

[vampykween]

deleting later maybe but hi bbs! obsessed w my outfit today so i must share 🐇❣️

also kisses to everyone that has shown me love recently. my little heart is so full right now, i’m feeling so much better about life!

working on the next part of second chances right now and i’m so excited for u all to read it xoxo

#mic talks #mic graces the internet with her face #<- such a stupid tag but idc i love it #today was so good guys i went thrifting #and i caught up with an old friend and talked to my brother #sometimes life sucks but i will make the most of it :)

[mexican-roxas]

good evening, AkuRoku nation. This is an attempt at a fankid. Protect her with your life. Or bully her relentlessly, I don’t care. pspspsps-ing you like cats

#akuroku #axel x roxas #kh roxas #kh axel #I uncharacteristically went to a school play audition without fleeing today so I’m gonna come out of my shell on the internet too. #if you must point and laugh at me then do so and conclude quickly. also ask me things about her maybe #edit: I’m in the aforementioned play now and it sucks ass. save me akuroku baby.

[cantstayawaycani]

Personal...

#just got racially profiled at my local post office while trying to buy money orders for my rent #i go there every month and deal with the same postal clerks #and they know this is my rent money #for some reason this was the day they decided to treat me like i was trying to commit fraud #i was so upset #there were three of them #all asian #which really hurt and confused me #two of them know me #i've been going to that post office for almost six years now #those clerks know me #but today they treated me like dirt #i'm so mad and sad #i need a stiff drink #i want to cry #but i'm a grown woman #I don't know why i'm telling the internet #my mom lives all the way in new york so she can't come give me a hug and calm me down #it sucks to be reminded that people will lie TO you and ON you because they don't like that you're black and can afford what they can't

[lesbiansanemi]

Bad day. Horrible awful terrible bad day

#there’s not even a reason. nothing bad has actually happened #it just FUCKING SUCKS #I want to walk into a lake and never come back #I want to take my brain out of my skull and throw it at a wall and watch it splatter #I know today sucks because I’m so tense and upset that my back HURTS so fucking bad #cuz when this happens I tense up and my back muscles decide to coil around my spine and squeeze like a starving snake #it’s spreading through my shoulders and even to my chest which is a first #I just 😭😭😭 I want to go home except home also sucks cuz roommate #and I know he’ll be out in a few days but that feels like forever #and I’m so tired and I’m so upset and I want to curl up in a ball and cry and hide from the world #but I’m working a 7 day stretch at my job #and I have to transfer the power and internet to my name sometime before Wednesday #and I’m so sick of takeout the idea of eating it makes me want to vomit but I can’t physically bring myself to cook while they’re there #and I just. ugh. UGH #I’m so sick of existing #why does my life only allow me small handfuls of months at a time #where I’m not living in some form of disaster and stressed to all hell and back and just wanting to lay down and die #what did I do so wrong. what have I done to deserve all this shit #in my short terrible miserable fucking life #whatever I’ll just go home and stare at the wall #and then go to bed and come to work and come to work and come to work there’s always going to work #I’m going to fucking scream I hate my brain #why can’t it just regulate itself in a normal way cuz that’s the thing I know I’m being insane and nothing is actually this bad #but man if it doesn’t fucking feel that way #and being aware I’m being batshit really doesn’t make it better actually I think it makes it worse #kaz rambles

[scrambleseggy]

Does anyone else think it’s miserably depressing that most of the trans men tag right now is either people arguing about oppression terminology, feminism and is also full of half naked pics of women bot accounts— because I do.

#trans men #told my coworker the internet sucks when it comes to transition today and they fullheartedly agreed lol #i didnt trust twitter for shit and i dont trust over half this tag with shit either tbh #yall are a pre-transition fucking nightmare just like twitter was lol

[limielle]

idk i feel like so much discourse could be easily minimized if people learned to say "i think" instead of "it is"

#like “i think this is a bad game” is way less abrasive/aggressive than “this is a bad game” #do u know where im going w this like #it's literally 2 extra words and it could avoid like 99% of confrontation #ofc there would still be people who are like “omg how can u hate smth i like ur trash” but idk i feel like so much of this discourse u see #on twt especially #is like ? just people being deliberately aggressive abt stuff they dont like to antagonise others and then going “its just my opinion” #and it's hard to read tone online so it's often hard for me (and im sure for others ?? idk actually) to read whether or not sm1 is being #like. just sharing what they think vs them trying to bait out people who will defend smth they like #idk ive been trying to find ffxiv people to follow bc getting back into the game and finally being confident in my art to draw for it also #has me looking for ppl to follow but i wanna avoid the big livetweet first time experiencers and unfortunately that leaves #a lot of people who are afraid of dawntrail/unhappy with the current patch quests #of which i am neither and i also dont want to log on to the internet every day just to see ppl shitting on things u know ? #and i have seen a LOT of like #'x sucked' and 'fandom lacks critical reading skills' and whatnot #but then u see what theyre talking abt and all theyre doing is shitting on the game itself or going 'x expansion was mid' #like . if u stopped phrasing ur opinions as objective fact i feel like maybe ud avoid half those arguments id k??? #just words #SORRY im talkative today the truth is i worked on a drawing veyr hard and i do not have the strength to colour it but it will not look good #without colour and i feel like i cant move on without it so i went and replayed shadowbringers instead and cried a lot #and now i have lots of icarus feelings again #WOW loiok at me writing an essay out here i overshare so much im sorry

[fauxfroot]

just imagined the fucking buckwild moral purity bs that would exist around izaya if the drrr anime came out now and immediately wanted to commit arson omfg

he is introduced in the anime as talking a girl into jumping off a building. in the light novels he tells two girls they aren't "serious enough" about commiting suicide, drugs them, shoves them in some suitcases, and leaves them for celty to come pick up. like. he would be the character no one would be allowed to like without being called an abuser or someshit. and yet he was THE fan favorite back in the day. fucking wild. i love my trash asshole man so much, lets go back to that just being okay to enjoy in a character yeah??

#ngl i think basically every character in drrr would be wildly misinterpreted by the internet today #it would be wayyyy more niche than it was if it came out now #erika and walker tried to warn us... #they have a whole rant about fiction not being reality in the saika arc #and how people acting like violence in fiction is the problem are looking in entirely the wrong places #narita may suck at longer storylines but he's got a few good ideas in there