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bcyhoods · 11 months

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BLUSHING🫀 ─── send in a character au and a scenario for a drabble or headcanons !

omg okay I need ur thoughts on fake dating with rockstar!eddie. this is a threat (I’m kidding. mostly)

BYE I NEED. musician!reader annnnnd mean eddie. (well as mean as i was able to convey, it’s barely there im sorry LOLZ)

super cool 100 celebration

fake dating with rockstar!eddie

it is absolutely, entirely a pr stunt at first.

mr. munson’s reputation is a little worse for wear at the moment. his devilish good looks can only get him out of so much trouble

and you’re an up-and-coming artist with a new single that you want to release so badly buuuuuuuuuuut

marketing! you need more outreach, more publicity, so that it can actually sell and so your label doesn’t lose money

and hey, what do ya know? you and eddie are signed to the same label! hey, they have an awesome idea

eddie is dismissive at first. he can’t make eye contact with you for more than two seconds at a time and when you’re alone he looks so grumpy

the first outing is at a diner and you’re trying to ask him questions because you’re gonna be stuck spending time together for who knows how long (and he’s also very attractive. sue you for wanting to get to know him)

“so how’d you get into music :)))”

and he kinda frowns. it’s more like a wince than anything else, like he has a splinter. and he’s like “does it matter? the faster we eat, the faster we can leave.”

and boy, does that set the mood for the rest of the evening. you’re sitting there eating a meal with someone who gives off the impression that they hate you

but as you’re walking out, he’s quick to grab onto your hand and lead the way out. and you’re like ??? until you notice the mob that stands outside

it’s so overwhelming. there’s a sea of paparazzi that you have to fight through, everyone is yelling, the camera flashes are blinding, and eddie is walking way too fast for comfort that your fingers are starting to slip from his grip

he’s glancing back at you and he notices all the lenses being shoved in your face and the really creepy whistles

so he starts shoving, elbowing, shouting expletives — which is really counterintuitive considering the terms of your relationship — in order to wrap an arm around your shoulders and guide you to the car

“are you okay? did any of em touch you? >:(”

and it gives you whiplash because this man was ignoring your existence like 10 minutes ago

i mean you don’t know that it’s because he’s disappointed. first date with somebody that is way out of his league and it’s a damn pr stunt. and you’re kind, and you make good music, but there’s no way you’re actually interested

so he keeps you at arms length because he doesn’t want to get his feelings hurt. after that day, he eases up a little though

he knows more about the industry than you do, so he’s giving you pointers, spilling little secrets

he suggests that they include a sound bite of your voice on the band’s next single and the label is eating it up

whenever you go to parties or events together and you’re wearing something that hugs your figure or shows skin, he is drooling. he cannot focus on anything anybody is saying

it’s really not hard to pretend to be in love with you cough because he’s not pretending cough

he is always touching you. even when you’re alone, his hands are holding yours, his arm is around your shoulders, his thigh is pressing against yours

obviously, he makes a show of it in front of the cameras, pulling you in so close that you’d think someone super glued your sides together. a big smack of his lips against your forehead (forehead kisses are so hard to dismiss because they’re so affectionate)

but when you’re alone, he becomes really gentle? and you didn’t think eddie munson was capable of soft touches but it’s sooooooooo

his hand rests on your lower back whenever you enter a room, it’s very light and timid though, like he doesn’t want to push any boundary. he holds your elbow too

you both think of a really sick “photo bait” that the paps can take pictures of like feeding each other grapes or pouting at each other and you guys laugh and cringe at it

on the inside though you’re both like “wait a minute why do i like this rn”

then the label catches on and they suggest that you guys need to kiss on camera when your single releases

and you’re so nervous because you guys have shared cheek and forehead kisses before, but the lips are a whole new territory

so at the release party, right at midnight, he’s beaming down at you with a smile that looks so real and genuine and his eyes are glowing

but when you lean up to kiss him, he stops you. his hands are holding your jaw and he leans over to whisper in your ear

“i want our first kiss to be in private, because we both want it. not because someone’s taking a picture.”

and your brain goes to mush like ?!?!????!!

and you discover pretty quickly that he really is a damn good kisser

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poppy-metal · 2 years

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i fully believe steve prefers hitting it from the back idc idc idc. i want to fuck him so bad i'm going to have a meltdown fuck omg

He looks so pretty when he's miserable.

warnings: asshole!steve, reader is okay with it though. brief hints of nancy/reader. an even briefer hint of poly nancy/reader/steve at the end bc i have no control of my clit. hopeful ending. smut.

a/n: literally just wanted to write angry steve hitting it from the back but backstory snuck in and now im thinking about this dynamic. help.

ike....post breakup with nancy. you're buzzing when you hear he's at the party you're at. as the rumor mill goes, he hasn't been the partying type since wheeler broke his heart. at a party, you hear. so knowing he is hear has your heart beating fast.

you've always had a thing for him. ever since your freshman year really, when you'd been that annoying person who showed up to school with too many supplies. colored pens and highlighers neatly lined in front of you, pink notebook and fuzzy pink pencil posied and ready to take notes. it was embarrassing really. you felt a little silly when you saw how everyone else wasn't nearly as eager as you were.

but then steve had come into the room, laughing with his friends. that good smelling cologne filling the space around you as he passed. he'd stopped for a moment, glancing down at your colorful assortment and you'd felt so humiliated, sure he was about to say something sarcastic. but he'd merely curled his lips in a half kind of smile and rapped his knuckes on your desk, "look at you all prepared. putting us all to shame already, eh?"

maybe it HAD been sarcastic. you didn't care. either way, you'd been obsessed with him ever since.

but he'd gone and fallen in love with nancy wheeler. you couldn't blame him. or her. she was very pretty, you'd caught yourself sneaking glances in the lockerooms when you'd been changing for gym. had nearly had a heart attack when she'd smiled at you one day and said she liked your bra, thought it was cute.

so you hadn't been bitter. just disappointed. they were a hot couple. you'd moved on anyway, dated throughout high-school, done your thing.

it was the end of senior year though. and you and steve were at the same party. and he was single. ready to mingle? you'd find out.

finding him wasn't easy. you felt like a bit of a stalker, you had to admit, scouring the crowded rooms, peeking in rooms. you guessed just because he decided to come, didn't mean he was in a party mood.

you did find him though. at the last room at the end of the hall. the master bedroom, you had to guess. he was sagged in chair in the corner of said room, nursing a half empty bottle of beer, gripped loosely in his fingers. he looked beautiful. and a little pathetic. mostly beautiful, though.

he wore sunglasses, tipped precariously on the edge of his nose. he was wearing black, all black, which even you knew was strange. his hair wasn't styled. hanging into his forehead in a messy heap. his cheeks were flushed pink. he had to be tipsy.

you stepped gently into the room, "who's funeral?" you said idly, trying to keep your voice cool. like you'd just accidentally stepped in and hadn't been searching like a stalker.

steve peered at you from the bridge of his sunglasses, squinting like he was trying to place you, and then relaxing when he stopped trying to figure out who you were. "mine." he replied simply, swinging the bottle back to take a large sip. you watched his adams apple bob.

"oh, well. my condolences to your family." you try to joke, "i heard steve was an upstanding young man. he will be missed."

he looked at you then. really looked at you. in a way that made your skin heat, before he was looking away again. propping his chin on his hand and staring off somewhere. "will he?" he sounded wistful. you had a feeling he meant nancy. you winced.

"i think she was dumb, you know." you blurt without thinking. steves eyes snap to yours though, so you can't fold the words up and swallow them. you have to push forward. "b-by breaking up with you, i mean. i would never-"

you stop there, realizing you were about to lay out your minor obsession just like that. you feel his eyes on you, heavy and intense, but you're looking at the floor now. you hear the sound of him setting his bottle down.

"close the door." his voice sounds a bit clearer now. you look up at him, startled. the glint of his sunglasses meet you. you gulp, and hesitantly close the door.

"lock it."

you do that to. you're like a puppet, you think. a quiet marionette. the click of the lock sounds thunderous in the now quiet room. the thump of the party downstairs sounds distant, like a different universe from the one you're in right now.

steve stands up. you assumed he was at least a little tipsy, but he walks fine. walks you all the way back until your hip touches the dresser behind you. your own wide eyed reflection meets you in his glasses. you feel trapped. you don't want to break free.

he tilts his head, a lock of golden hair falling. your hands twitch to feel it. you know his hairs got to feel so soft. absurdly so.

"you'd never." he parrots back to you. "you'd never.....what? break up with me in a bathroom? lie about loving me? ditch me for some freak with bad hair?"

you blink. there's alot to unpack there. your fingers dig into the wood behind you. "u-um. well, y-yes." you look down again, "I'd never break up with you....if i had you."

"you're that girl from chemistry." he says suddenly, like hes just now remembering. you feel your skin light up with his recognition. "i remember now."

you start to smile-

"could always feel you staring at me. like, you never stopped. it was kinda creepy."

your smile falls.

"you've waited a long time for this, then, huh?" his voice sounds distant. casual. "for us to break up. wanted to swoop in and, what? comfort me? make me feel better? remind me why im the king of fucking hawkins?"

he sounds like he's making fun of himself. bitter. you realize this isn't about you, you're just a vessel. you could turn and walk away. he doesn't want you. not in the way you want him to. but- he sounds so sad, too. and maybe you were creepy, and weird, and a stalker. but.

"if that's what you want." you tell him, blinking up at him, resolved in your decision. "you've always been a king to me. even what you and nancy split. you're the coolest guy I know."

you hear his sharp inhale of breath. see his pink lips part. he closes them. jerks his head, "turn around. bend over." when you pause he raises an eyebrow, "you wanna help me right? this is what i need. i need to fuck." he touches your waist, where your skirt meets your top. "Is that good with you?"

you spin around without another second delay, bending at the waist over the hard wood of the dresser. the way he said fuck is running through your head, making you dizzy. steve harrington wants to fuck you. jesus.

you feel your skirt being hiked up, and your toes curl in your flats, cunt already wet and slick. ever since you saw him sitting there with a bottle in hand.

you feel his finger on the outline of your panties, push yourself up on your toes to grind back.

you hear his husky chuckle, and then his sunglasses are being thrown haphazardly on the dresser next to you. you hear him unluckle his jeans, unzip.

"I should have never dated nancy." he says, to himself. you whine as you feel the pressure of his blunt tip at your folds, he's holding your panties to the side, not even bothering to yank them down your thighs. "when wet willing pussy like this was around-" his chest presses against your arched spine, his head catches against your slick hole. pushes in. he grunts and you whimper. "could've. fuuuuck that's it- could've been fucking girls like you in the back of my car every weekend. instead of. buying. fucking. flowers. shit- goddamn."

he punctuates each word with a hard thrust, slamming your hips into the hard wood. the slap, slap, slap of him fucking you fills the room. makes you drool. hes using you, using you to feel better about himself. about the pain she caused. and you're fine with it, thrust back into him when he growls "that's right. back that ass up on my dick.", squeeze around him just to hear his breath hitch. you'd have gladly been a wet willing pussy for him to fuck into whenever he wanted. you don't care. this feels amazing.

"fuck, you're so good." his praise makes you dizzy, drip around him and the slick sounds your pussy is making around his cock are downright lewd. "such a good pussy. god, i missed this."

"you can have it," you whine, humping back into him, "whenever you want."

"yeah?" he sounds breathless. close. "gonna give me your number after this and let me cash in on this hot little piece of pussy whenever i want, huh? gonna pick up and drop everything the moment i call, right? spread those pretty legs without me even having to ask?"

you nod desperately, feeling yourself start to peak, bite down on your hand because you'll scream if you dont. he fucks so good. he hits so deep. hes so fucking big.

"good girl." he groans, gripping your hips and pulling you back to meet his pounding. "gonna cum in you. you're gonna let me."

you're so glad you're on birth control. you'd let him anyway, even if you weren't. "uh huh." you babble dumbly, "want it. cum in me."

he fucks you hard, before stilling, slamming into you to the hilt and pressing you down with his hand at the back of your head into the wood underneath you. you feel the warm splash of cum inside you, the grinding of his pelvis against your clit making your own orgasm gush around him. you feel limp and exhausted afterwards, panting heavily.

steve is quiet as he pulls out of you. you're both quiet as you right your clothing. he picks up his sunglasses and runs a hand through his hair, not meeting your gaze.

"do you." you lick your lips. "do you. uh. want my number?"

he puts the glasses on. shield his emotions from you, just like that. he nods once, jerkily. "sure. why not?"

____

steve doesn't call you after that. and two years later, when hawkins is overrun by monsters you never thought could be real, he saves you. you'd thought you'd never see him again. but there he is, but he's not alone.

nancy is with him. at his side. they're holding hands. in a way only lovers do. in the way you saw them do in the hallways your sophomore and junior year.

you almost wish he would have let you die. remembering that night, two years ago. him inside you. him using you. you letting him. of course, you'd only been an outlet. duh.

you let him convince you to stay with them though, guessing the protection couldn't be the worst thing.

you don't see the way he looks at you. don't see the guilt in his eyes, the shame. he wasn't himself that night, and you didn't even know it. he'd wanted to call. but then everything had happened. and he got nancy back. that's all that should matter. right?

he doesn't know why he can't stop watching you then. why he can't stop wanting to apologize and swear to you that the him you saw wasn't the him he actually was.

but he can't. when he looks at nancy, he's a little suprised to see her staring after yout too, pretty lips parted. like she's remembering something.

when she catches steve looking she blushes and looks away.

huh.

#ask #steve harrington smut #steve harrington x reader #stranger things x reader #steve harrington x you

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daphnebowen · 5 months

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percy jackson and the olympians tv show episode 2 thoughts

again, just copying my original thoughts from last week 😭😭 lots of rambling, screaming, and general freaking out ahead!

Literally the whole first part of the episode I was sitting on the edge of my seat wondering “is annabeth going to say it? is she going to say percabeth’s iconic line?? I will be so incredibly disappointed if she doesn’t” and then SHE SAID IT SHE SAID IT OMG I LOVE HER and Percy’s reaction lol “huh?”

dude Dionysus is actually perfect “PETER JOHNSON IS HERE” man I am so looking forward to all of their banter

uhhh not me saying chiron’s name wrong for five plus years now and only now finding out it’s KYron and not CHEEron *sobs*

the whole thing with mr d saying he’s Percy’s dad was so funny I was cackling the whole time lol and not Percy ACTUALLY believing him and then Chiron shows up and it’s like “uh wait a minute hold on”

okay it is totally weird realizing that none of these people know who Percy’s dad is or what he can do but everyone watching (or mostly everyone I’ll say) does UGH I FEEL OLD

the music growing scarier as Luke approaches ACK FORESHADOWING he’s kinda cute tho I love his hair

i absolute adore how they made Percy mad about the injustice of the unclaimed at this young age not just as a fifteen year old and I freaking LOVE that for him

Clarisse is amazing, perfect, and gorgeous in every single way

DEMIGOD IN A WHEELCHAIR ALERT 🚨

“is there a greek god of disappointment? maybe someone should ask him if he’s missing a kid” dude I feel bad but the way I lost my mind - walker’s comedic timing and inflection was on point

AND THE FACT THIS GUY HAS AN ANSWER BAHAHAH

OMG WAIT THATS CHRIS AS IN… CHRIS CHRIS??? CLARISSE’S CHRIS??? CHRISTOPHER FREAKING RODRIGUEZ?? AHHHHH

percy is breaking my heart bro praying to his momma and everything it’s ok honey

YES THE BATHROOM SCENE that was lowkey kind of anticlimactic…

ANNABETH YAY

the fact that she just calmly admitted she’s stalking Percy and he’s just like “okay” onto the next thing lmao

was it just me pronouncing Thalia’s name like TAlka and not THAlia like how it’s spelled *sobs* I am really bad at this apparently

luke is making it really hard for me to remember he’s a bad guy, he’s so charming and sweet!

YES CAPTURE THE FRICKIN FLAG LESGOOOO

”sunshine” IS SO CUTE I CANT IM FANGIRLING Annabeth is everything I ever imagined her to be

NOT PERCY FLOSSING OH MY

AND SINGING ROBIN HOOD AND LITTLE JOHN RUNNIN THRU THE FOREST OR WTV HES PERFECT I CANT

percys battle instincts are JAW DROPPING that fight scene was perfect

dude that claiming! Honestly didn’t picture the trident being so big but I think it kind of fits, bc how else is everyone 20 feet away gonna see it?

percy being so confuzzled when Mr d tells him he stole the master bolt is so funny “wHaT?!”

WHERE IS THE ORACLE BRUH

final thoughts: okay, that episode was PHENOMENAL! Camp half blood is absolutely gorgeous, the capture the flag scenes were perfect. Walker is crushing it as Percy and that was genius casting and I will say that till the day I die. I cannot wait for the third episode! my only complaint is, where’s the Oracle?? I genuinely want to hear the prophecy! because if she’s not here now then how’s Rachel gonna become the next oracle? I will hyperventilate bc perachel was so good for percabeth’s growth hahaha. I really really hope she’s in the next episode! I guess we’ll see!

haha thanks for reading my chaotic notes

#my reviews #percy jackson #pjo #annabeth chase #percy jackon and the olympians #percy jackson and the olympians #percy pjo #pjo series #pjo fandom #pjo tv show #grover underwood #sally jackson

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beautifulpersonpeach · 10 months

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BPP, am really really interested to read your thoughts on Seven!

Ask 2: Hey bpp, can i be honest?? Ive been checked out of the fandom but still keep track of any music releases. So i didnt know abt any rumors abt 7. Imagine me being kind of disappointed that it’s another english song from jk when i watched the mv😅 it feels like his most promoted songs since last year has been all eng song… idk i wanted & expted something diff… i didnt like l&r, dreamers and now 7… it’s back to back lol. Tbf i didnt like My You too and thats in korean. At least not enough to listen!again after the first listen.

Im happy that still with you is finally on spotify tho. I’ll still be waiting excited for his album whenever it comes out. Hopefully ill find something i like in it!!

[BPP Note: Both asks above were sent before my "I don't like it..." post. The asks posted below were sent afterwards.]

Ask 3:

Same here

All the hype didn't matched with the song

1. rest members songs had so much depth and substance to it while this was the cliche boy chasing a girl song. Like we always dont need deep songs but the quality could be so much better. This was like just another pop song.

I think I'll put this on same level as BAD DECISIONS. But for bad decisions, atleast the chorus was staying on my mind while for this nothing was catchy enough for us to humm. Just because it's JK it will get hype but otherwise it's so generic. I think I liked LEFT and RIGHT way better than Seven. Even the rap portion felt so unnecessary and boring.

2. MV was kinda nice because of the production but concept was too shallow, the stalking and chasing was so outdated. In my country we have like 9293928843837 MVs in this same concept that not many make the same theme songs again.

3. The choreography. We haven't seen the full version. But for tiktok they do the highlight portions if that's so mediocre idk how rest will be. It was again giving the same mediocre showing off choreography and for me backdancers ruined it with their awkward moves.

4. they wanted this song to be played everywhere around the world. But there was nothing catchy enough to attract gp or go viral on tiktok, even if we sped it up. The only way to make everyone listen is to shove it down their throat but doing payola. But idk if investing in payola is worthy for the song. I also doubt the longietivity, as for me it was boring after 2 listens. I'll rather listen Like Crazy or wildflower or closer 20 times than listening this once.

5. I HOPE he'll bring something fresh to the table for his album and don't involve this mediocre producers who uses the same formula and same superstar persona to make a song successful. He is so much talented to sing a song which is so rich in melody and lyrics. And he can produce way better songs by himself.

Prolly a 4/10 for me

Ask 4: troye sivan's rush (which also came out last night) is exactly what I wish Seven was. I don't mean that in a 'I expect the things JK to make to be gay' way just in the way it's a fun, very danceable, sexy summer song that doesn't pull its punches. Something about seven feels too run through a commercial sanitizer a few times, even with the explicit lyrics.

***

Hi Anon(s),

Jungkook likes to fuck.

Rather, Andrew Watt likes to fuck and thinks Jungkook can relate.

JK has been talking about wanting to show more mature and explicit sides of himself for a good long while now. So I’m glad he’s finally gotten to do that, confirming for us why he keeps getting noise complaints from his neighbours since the mattresses all over his apartment don't help.

BTS has made songs explicitly referring to sex before (though it's been mostly the rapline doing so). So it's nothing new but I guess it's cool JK gets to share with us that he too has sex.

The question I posed to my friends immediately after watching the MV is, “Do you know who's been doing A&R for BigHit since 2020? I really need to know who is doing A&R for BigHit in America because they’ve been doing an appalling job lately. I'm starting to wonder if it's an inside job cause this song is kinda ass.”

That was me ~11 hours ago.

I didn’t like the song.

I’ve streamed Seven about 20 times since then I think, took a break from the song for a few hours, watched his GMA performance, caught a few minutes of the Wlive, then listened to it again just before writing this post and…

I still don’t like it.

Jungkook did a good job on the song, Latto's verse wasn't terrible, and while the song itself isn’t bad… the song isn’t good either.

It’s painfully, and at this point it’s a pattern so I have to add, predictably, mediocre.

Reserving judgement for the album, but Anons, I agree with you for the most part. The suits at BigHit are trying but they are woefully out of touch with the reasons BTS blew up in the West in the first place. I don't even feel like spending any energy doing a review or even trying to explain what I mean. So I'll just ramble on for a bit but try to keep it brief.

---

I have to give BigHit some credit because I can see what they're going for here. Andrew Watt is a very celebrated producer in the US, he won the Grammy award for Producer of the Year in 2021, he's got A listers in his portfolio. So, he's not a cheap name to book and I can see why the suits at BigHit thought he's the genius to gift them a song clinically designed for American radio.

But that pandejo phoned it in. There isn't a lick of creativity to be found anywhere in all 3 minutes and five seconds.

It reminds me of VIBE by Jimin and Taeyang, as the closest analog to the vague dissatisfaction morphing into annoyance and then pragmatic rationalization I experienced in that same sequence when listening to it the first few times.

The song is disappointing because we've all heard it before. Too many times, and we're bored of it. We've heard JK sing this sort of song for years, as covers mostly. So on one hand, while I guess it's nice JK gets to have an American summer JB-reject pop tune of his own, it's not good enough to be the track that introduces him to the world as a solo artist.

It's fine for any white, blonde, blue-eyed heartthrob that can ride on a pretty face and implicit bias to rack up accolades, it's not good enough for Jungkook.

And BigHit needs to start using whatever leverage a US$10.6 billion market capitalization buys you in Hollywood, to insist for songs that are at least as good as the songs made by BTS members and produced by their in-house team. It's a waste of money and everybody's time to fly a battalion to LA just to record 2014's summer hit in 2023.

In my opinion.

Still With You > Stay Alive > My Time > Stay > Left & Right > My You > Dreamers > Seven

All that said, I can't ignore JK has a taste for songs like this, and it's not his fault the song is shit (he didn't write, compose or produce it), so technically he shouldn't be punished for it. And the song is made for radio, while it's not my personal taste a lot of people really like the song (one of my friends likes Seven the most out of all the BTS releases so far), and it will catch on with some support. So, ARMY will support it including me, just to a lesser degree than I've done so far. Fingers crossed JJK1 has something solid on it.

#For people who wanted by opinion on Angel Pt 1 #take the latter sections of this post as one reason I'm not a fan of that song #Seven could've been fine as track seven on the album as an interlude or something #Not as the introductory single to JK's solo debut #Lol what a joke #Anyway #bts #jungkook #jeon jungkook #bangtan #bighit #hybe #bts fandom #bts army #JK Seven

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yeastinfectionvale · 2 months

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OKAY so kind of part right. Naomi doesn't drive anymore, but she does work as an engineer with Williams. Her father drove rally cars in the 90s, before he lost his hand in a horrific accident. Despite this Naomi was raised around cars (her mother was a mechanic), and fell in love with driving and karting, though her dad always warned her against that life since it, by his own admission, made him absolutely miserable before permanently disabling him. She showed great promise, though, and her parents wanted to support her through it all, so long as she always aimed for better than her best.

She and Suki drove in f2 together, usually ending up vying for first place against each other. Naomi kept his advances of friendship at arms length for a long time, worried it would distract her from her father-given mission. She was a reserve driver for Alpine for a time, driving her first and last f1 race in Monaco in 2022. Eventually, she and Suki got closer, since Suki is Not one to give up trying to be friends with people, and she really did feel quite lonely. Their friendship was pretty well publicised, and for a long time, people speculated they were dating. It was racing against her that Suki had his big accident, and she witnessed the whole thing, ending up striking his car and having her own accident which, although overshadowed by the more dramatic injury served to her friend, put her out of commission for the foreseeable future.

Suki did assume she wouldn't want to be friends with him after, but she turned mostly to him for comfort. She decided herself after watching what had happened to her friend, what had happened to her, and what happened to her dad, that she just wasnt willing to risk it, especially since she, at that time, believed her chances of ever getting into f1 were extremely low, deciding instead to go to university to study engineering and help out around races for some experience. Her parents were extremely disappointed, and her father particularly blamed Suki for a while, refusing to speak to him and being generally bitter. It took some talking to from Naomi to get him to come around.

In the wake of the accident, Naomi and Suki spent a LOT of time together, and as Suki recovered and went back to driving, he was offered a place driving for Aston Martin, and their supposed relationship ended up even more publicised. With Suki not particularly wanting to stunt his growth by coming out, he just went with the lie and the two of them fake dated for basically the entirety of his rookie season. Which is funny because tho the media ate it up, literally any queer person who had ever seen Suki in person would say That Boy Does Not Like Women.

Anyways here are some pictures I've invented of her

Also she's from London. Do with that info what you will

OOOOOOH RALLY DAD (GROUP B?) THATS SO COOL. OH CHOOSING TO LEAVE RACING AND STUDY MUST HAVE BEEN A TOUGHT DECISION TO MAKE WOW. GOD THE F2 ACCIDENT MUST HAVE SHAKEN HER BADLY. THE FAKE DATING BIT IM CRYING OOOF.

Oooh I think what September was to Suki, Naomi might be to Mina (minus the whole toxic yaoi hehehe). But the most important thing

ANOTHER LONDONER (Mina is buzzing). Where in London???

#asks??? in this economy???#Eachtra tag #F1 oc time

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thorfishcrusher · 3 days

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first httyd rant of many!!! yahoo!!!

this is kinda just me nonsensically talking about the alphabet(s) used in httyd because theyre kind of inconsistent?? to put it simply

insert menacing dot dot dot here

googling "httyd alphabet" lowkey made me sob cuz there were so many different variations of the symbols they used, from somewhat official sources to definitely not official ones.

they all do share elements from the futhark runic alphabet used during, or around the time period viking were in their golden age. more or less; i honestly dont know too much about runes so i apologize in advance for anything im wrong about

runes used in that time period weren't very specific, they were designed to easily carve into the materials they were using and mostly relied on just sounding things out. like lets bring that back that sounds WAY easier than learning 20 different variations of spelling the same word

younger futhark(which was more popular during the viking age,) for example, only had 16 characters, in contrast to the 24 characters in the modern english alphabet. more often than not, translated runes are littered with spelling mistakes.

that doesn't mean the vikings weren't less intelligent than people today, spelling and writing just wasn't a necessity as it commonly is in current times.

but anyway, the alphabet systems used in the books, movies, and tv shows can be directly translated into modern english, long as you ignore all the stupid ass inconsistencies (this is directed at the films, not the books)

both the movies and tv shows have similarities to futhark runes, though the movies appear to be inspired by anglo saxon runes, and the tv shows do have similar characters used in elder futhark. neither can be 100% translated to any sort of alphabetical system used at the time, and i believe berk has developed their own writing system over the centuries.

in the movies (at least from what i know) the way words were spelt were influenced on how they were sounded out, while the tv shows were slightly more correct for the future day standards. so congratulations, you can most likely spell better than hiccup in the movies. the punctuation system isn't really clear, and in futhark variations words were primarily just separated by dots. though, according to that one episode in rtte that i totally remember completely watching where snotlout shat on his dads grammar, i imagine people in berk have a more complex grammar system.

on top of that, quite a lot of people in berk seem to have the ability to read and write, more than the average viking tribes of the time. id like to assume they put more emphasis on learning to read efficiently because of the dragon book. information regarding dragons was important, and so id imagine being able to to proficiently record said information was important, too. thus the berkians (and perhaps surrounding tribes, outcasts, etc) adapted to better suit their priorities

ummm yeah idk thats kinda it

i say as if i havent put more thought and time into this dopey ass fictional thing than i have with actual beneficiary stuff

tl, dr; did you seriously scroll all this way to see if there was a summary? youll be disappointed because i am the master yapper and i am unable to be quick with my words

but basically just me talking abt the differentiating runes used in httyd, and how they connect to real world languages at the time, wnd um er um yo MOTHER

ive literally had this account for a day and ive written a 10 paragraph essay on silly little symbols

ill probably be using rtte's alphabet cuz it seems relatively easy for my little pea brain

#httyd #so sorry LMAOO #big fucking beefy juicy rant #clearly i have my priorities set #i ate your mother #not in a weird way lplesde #rant post

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mywingsareonwheels · 8 months

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On "Endeavour" series 9 (a critical/disappointed but affectionate post)

Cut for length, spoilers, and criticism :)

I've been thinking so much (too much ;-) ) about the ending of Endeavour since it came out. Sometimes joyfully, sometimes wistfully, mostly sadly. Occasionally angrily.

What series 9, and especially 9.3 really needed to do was a) wind up and honour the character arcs/plot arcs of Endeavour and b) set things up for Inspector Morse. And honestly, after months of pondering and thinking and hearing other people's views on it (both those I agree with and those I don't, the latter actually including Shaun Evans's ;-) )... I think it did at least partially fail in both those aims. But I think it failed ambitiously and lovingly. Which matters.

The Bad Stuff:-

The key problem Russell Lewis has said he had in writing s9 was the Thursday family and the fact that Morse never mentions any of them in IM, at least unless Joan really is the Mrs Strange of that period of time.

This problem was made worse by the fact that they are four of the most lovable characters in Endeavour, and that the relationship between Morse and Fred Thursday is the key one within it. So I can see the logic! Something awful has to happen. And given Morse's romantic interest in Joan, the Thursday family generational war trauma, and Fred's PTSD-ridden tendencies towards explosive violence when he's feeling protective of his loved ones or other vulnerable people... I can see why Lewis went with the solution he did.

The trouble is... solving the Problem of the Thursdays I think took over series 9 to such an extent that the writing managed to:-

a) honestly? fridge the character development and perceived quality of all four Thursdays (especially Fred and Joan, both of whom I think got a really rough deal tbh) in order to further Morse's long-term arc, which really is a bit bloody unfair after 9 seasons. Very very damn unfair in fact. And... uncompassionate, which is awful given that overall Endeavour is one of the most compassionate shows I've ever seen.

b) undermine Jakes's return by giving a necessary incompleteness to his search for Big Pete (and also massively underusing Jack Laskey, but honestly the fact that series 9 was only three episodes long did cause problems there).

c) turn Big Pete/Raymond Kennet into just a plot device for the aforementioned fridging of Fred's character development which... actually I admit didn't fully notice until I read a fic chapter today which did the opposite, but oof.

d) undermine Max's friendship with Morse in Inspector Morse by ignoring it completely and implying that Morse is Alone Forever after the events of Endeavour which just Isn't The Case (and again, James Bradshaw was shockingly underused). Gods could we have done with at least one scene where it was recognised that Max isn't going anywhere and they like each other so much. <3

e) actually? Undermine the complexity of the Morse of Inspector Morse too. Because DCI Morse? Is not constantly miserable and dour and closed off and unable to connect with people. He has friends, he has choir, he can make literary references in the station and have a random PC pick them up, he has a positively impish sense of humour at times, he still has his wonderful relationship with Joyce. His house is gorgeous and thoroughly well-loved. He immediately warms to Lewis who is a lot like Thursday at times, and he clearly rather enjoys Lewis teasing him so much. He is kind and compassionate, and sometimes his manner with witnesses is very like Thursday's avuncular best moments. Sure, DCI Morse is also difficult and grumpy and most definitely an alcoholic; he struggles to open up fully to people and never manages to pull off a long-term romantic relationship. But he's not a permanent ice king. He's actually a lot more like the earlier DC Morse at times than the Morse of the last few minutes of 9.3! The whole "I was betrayed by Thursday and now I will never trust anyone ever again ever" thing just wasn't necessary in order to set up Morse in his 40s and 50s. If anything, it leaves open the question of how he navigates what's actually a rather larger character jump than it would have been if Endeavour had ended earlier. Which just... ngyargh. (Also, I mean... I'm not aro, very emphatically not, but even I can see that there's something more than a bit problematic about the suggestion that Morse's life is tragic forever because he's usually single.)

Here's the other thing though: the one respect in which he is very closed-off even with Lewis in Inspector Morse is that he never tells Lewis about anyone important in his past unless he actually has to (usually because they die a violent death and his connection with the victim comes up). Never mentioning the Thursdays, Dorothea, Bright, Jakes? It didn't need that intense an explanation. At least, not a "he can't even bear to think about Fred or Joan again" explanation. It just means none of them died a violent death in Thames Valley during his time as DCI which, you know, I am extremely fricking glad about! ;-) He could press the still-beloved Thursday family to his heart like flowers, and that would be enough. He could still be getting postcards from all of them right up to the end (and I'm persisting in believing that he does ;-) ).

To unpack point a) a bit:- I mean where Joan's concerned I think a lot of us agree on this. I actually do like Strange! But it is horrible that we never hear anything about Joan's social work in series 9; it's implied that she's giving up her job in order to marry him. And Joan finding herself and moving towards saving the world one woman at a time was beautiful. I mean, there was no obligation to have everyone have a happy ending series 9! But the ending of that arc of Joan's without explanation and without comment. Not even a brief discussion where she says that she's regarding it as worth it, or is wondering about going back to work at some point... gah. That's harsh. Also, if she is the Mrs Strange of Inspector Morse? That isn't going to be a very happy marriage. :( So we're left I think hoping that they'll divorce, and that Joan will go back to social work one day, and perhaps go and find her family.

And Fred. Oh Gods, Fred. I mean, I have made so many posts about him on here. ;-) The thing is: with the context provided in series 9, him committing manslaughter (not murder! not under English/Welsh law! and he might even have a decent case for self-(and other) defense!) and perverting the course of justice (yeah okay that he definitely is guilty of) in order to save Sam... it makes sense. He has had his moments of violence, and I think it's crucial to not forget that he's killed two people to save Morse in the past. Which... is part of what frustrates me, because it feels like the narrative in 9.3 is that we should treat Fred killing to save Sam as somehow less morally okay than him killing to save Morse. Which is the kind of protagonist-centered morality (or indeed police-centered morality?) that the morseverse generally avoids, and I Do Not Like It.

But the precise circumstances that series 9 creates in order to make it convincing for Fred to a) do that, b) cover it up, c) snap that badly at Morse, d) try to justify what he's done to Morse... they were extreme. It takes one of the most intense piles of trauma laid on one character in one 3-episode season of anything I think I've ever seen. Fred is going through so much, he's so broken, he's so burnt out. And I mean... of course! It took all of that to make him make those mistakes! But in retrospect... if you need to set up that intense a situation in order to make a character fuck up enough to further the plot line of another character... yeah. Hence my comment about fridging his arc. The point of Morse and Fred's relationship until series 9 has always been that even though they are both very flawed and very fallible, their love for each other is a good and awesome thing (series 7 I think really brings that home <3 ). It feels to me that 9.3 makes the whole of the rest of the show less moving and good, and that's... oh that's sad. So sad. :( I mean, I'm very biased, the Morse & Fred relationship has always been my favourite thing about Endeavour! But if the ultimate message is "Morse should never have loved Fred that much, however kind Fred was and however often he saved Morse's life"... oh that's just... it makes the whole thing so much thinner. This is, apart from anything else, a man who explicitly puts his marriage at risk when his son is missing in order to save Morse at the end of s8! But now we're supposed to see everything a tragedy because Morse has to accept that he isn't that important to Fred and never has been because during a really intense few months he's not been Fred's number 1 priority and... gaaaah.

This is terribly rambly; I'm really not as articulate today as I should like. Apologies!

The thing is: I've been fighting actually-being-a-bit-disappointed-in-series 9 for months, but now I'm going "no actually they failed" I can be a bit more generous. :)

Because...

The Good Stuff:

a) Bright's arc is fantastic. 100/10, no criticisms. <3 Probably the only one I'm fully happy about but I am very happy about it.

b) There is not a split-second in the whole of series 9 (the whole of Endeavour in fact) in which the acting is other than superb, especially from the main cast. That farewell scene between Morse and Thursday? Fucking hell. I mean, Roger Allam is my favourite actor, he never disappoints, but he still astounded me! And Shaun was also just magnificent. <3 And why hasn't Anton Lesser played Prospero yet; his delivery of the speech was incredible! Also fucking hell Caroline O'Neill is an unsung hero of the whole show.

c) To do the Fred arc justice: Fred's morality wasn't thrown away over nothing. I do feel that the trauma-conga-line-to-enable-Fred-to-let-Morse-down-sufficiently bordered at least on the contrived and unkind, but my Gods it would have been so much worse if it wasn't there! <3

d) So much nuance. I mean the fact that a lot of us cheerfully disagree with each other over how forgiving or otherwise Morse was feeling towards Fred? Is based on microexpressions, and call-backs, and how much we can read into the layering of Fred's image over the reference to Lazarus "born a pauper" in the "In Paradisum" of the Faure Requiem, and what sounds like was more than one filmed version of the farewell scene. I mean, my Gods. Endeavour has always respected the intelligence of the viewer, but that was something else.

e) The nitty-gritty of the dialogue never stopped being wonderful. Some absolutely incredible lines, literary references, layered scenes... I know I talk about James Bradshaw and Jack Laskey being underused, but the lines that each of Max and Jakes got while actually onscreen? Phenomenal. Ditto Abigail Thaw/Dorothea, on all counts.

f) The cinematography bloody hell. <3 <3 <3 And the music! Aaah!

The failures of series 9 I see are in pacing, and in making flawed decisions that don't serve the characterisation. They aren't, not once, about the quality of filmmaking being anything other than fantastic. <3 Or the storyline being other than extremely ambitious. There's nothing lazy or cheap or shock-tactics-for-the-sake-of-shock-tactics or (grr) prioritising being unpredictable over being good. It's all earnest and loving and beautifully-realised.

So many times when a show ends disappointingly (or a show's current main actor's final series ending disappointingly *cough*Shetland*cough*) it's down to lack of care and attention and love. I can't possibly accuse Russell Lewis or anyone involved in Endeavour of that. <3

I just... I just wish, so much, that they'd made different choices for the Thursdays. But at least we still have fanfic. :-)

(Also, full love to those of you who disagree with me on part or all of this! I love that this is a fandom where we can agree to disagree, and avoid much in the way of ship wars/character wars etc.. <3 Long may it continue!)

#itv endeavour #endeavour spoilers #endeavour s9 #endeavour s9 spoilers #itv inspector morse #mild inspector morse spoilers #endeavour critical #but also #endeavour admiring #e morse #endeavour morse #inspector morse #fred thursday #joan thursday #russell lewis

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alloutofgoddesses · 4 months

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Percy Jackson TV Thoughts

Episode 5

(There will be book spoilers you have been warned)

I KNEW THE FATES WOULD BE HERE OMG

Him climbing over the railing lol

OUT THE GATE OKAY

Just a reminder Grover can read emotions. I wonder what the fuck he just read lol

Percy for four episodes: Fuck my dad he’s a piece of shit Percy immediately after being saved by his dad: My dads gonna help us uwu

Oh Percy. I don’t blame you you’re new to this thing

Oh nooo Percy your dad dies love you in his strange immortal way

Bike you say

Not the teasing ☠️ Percy that’s your future wife

Well not exactly… it is a warning but it doesn’t mean you’re going to die Annabeth

Hell yeah Percy keep up that spirit

HE’S HEREEEEEEE

Their little heads popping up over the barrier

Oh my gods he’s amazing

RIP Twitter we’ll always love you

That’s absolutely what Ares would be doing in the modern age too

GABE! THERE HE IS

…you’re not Percy. Your mother however-

Annabeth what happened to your healthy fear of the gods

Kronos mention

Flight of stairs AGAIN… what kind of theme are we setting up here

Sassy power couple

That’s such a Percy face Walker Scobell you will always be famous

You got this Grover!

Oh fuck that

PERCY WANTING TO SHOW ANNABETH MOVIES? OH IT’S SO OVER

Percy it is funny

Annabeth now is not the time to nerd out over mechanical engineering

As always they’re so perfect

SOLSTICE TIME

Wait what?

Ooooh Grover is playing the long game I see

None of y’all can ever say Oercy is stupid again I swear to god(s)

It lit up? Oh boy oh boy

MEME WARNING OH MY

Vibes though Hephaestus

Omg the Hera animation

~baby don’t hurt me~

Annabeth recognizing Sally wanted Percy to be different… don’t touch me

HE SAVED HER! AGAIN!!

Can’t wait to see screen grabs of the mosaics

“I hate my own kids” AAAAHHHHH

Is Grover on to Ares?

ATHENA TALKS TO AN OWL I CANNOT

Grover has to be on to Ares

Every single person in this trio is so smart

SEAWEED BRAIN

I am. Inconsolable.

I’m about to start doing zoomies around my dorm like my cat

I could rip apart a car with my bare hands rn

SHE WANTS TO SAVE HIS MOM I’M JSHDJSKSKA

“You think you had to ask” “Just making sure” how will I EVER survive more seasons of this

“It’s okay. I’m okay. I’m okay. I’m-“ THE WAY HE’S REASSURING HER OH THEY’RE TAKING IT

SHE’S TRYING TI FIGURE OUT THE GEARS IM GINNA EXPLODE

HEPHAESTUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

THE FLUTE OMG

As a cane user I love how prominent Hephaestus’ cane is displayed it makes me feel warm inside

HE’S HER FRIEND! SHE’S DISREPECTING GODS TO SAVE HIM!

Oh Hephaestus you’re my second favorite Olympian (Hestia 4evr)

ANNABETH!!!!!

“He isn’t that way. He’s better than that…” THE SOULMATISM

YEAH BABEY

The tears in her eyes I CAN’T

He’s gonna talk to Athena I love Hephaestus so much

Ares I see that disappointed look

Okay got Hermes hanging out in the Lotus Casino… don’t ask me how but that does feel right like it makes sense

Who needs to summon Hermes he’s right here (My cat is named Hermes and he’s sitting right next me)

Oh yeah Percy get in that God’s face and threaten him it certainly won’t have any repercussions

“The emotional abuse” GROVER UNDERWOOD

There’s creatures in there

Wait. Are they setting up Clarisse as a red herring? THE WRITERS MINDS

Teaser

IRIS MESSAGE

Wait there’s so many adults in the Lotus… what are they all doing in there

I have heard the rumours that ep. 6 will be a musical (simply because LMM is there and it’s the mostly likely one to do that) and while I don’t think they would it would be funny

#percy jackson #percy jackon and the olympians #PJO tv #percy jackson and the olympians #please ignore the typos I was excited and had a long day

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panelshowsource · 7 months

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this was my first time seeing tim and also getting a chance to say a brief hello! (though, i’m not particularly keen on meeting celebs or comedians and rarely take the opportunity, tim just seemed so approachable and that "this really could be my only chance ever" feeling hit hard, so i did it!; that said, i am incredibly disappointed having missed richard osman's book signing last month, but now i’m digressing…) he seemed so, so chuffed at the show being sold out and people being so happy to see him, it made my heart happy 🥹 and, yes, totally polite! (and quite hairy?) i said this before, but one of the best things about nyc shows is watching artists brim with pride — nyc brings out the 15-year-old dreamer in them that they used to be, you can see the "holy shit i really did it" in their eyes... never gets old!!

(this is a follow-up to a question about which 3 comedians i’d want to have dinner with!)

i think people would typically approach this question one of two ways: you want to meet the people you really, really love no matter what or you want to meet the people you really, really want to know more about. those two things can overlap, but sometimes a person you adore has already shared so much, written so many books, created so much, done so many interviews and answered so many questions that you might feel it's a greater privilege to see behind the door of a fiercely private person instead, if forced to choose. stephen fry and simon amstell are great examples of people i've loved so long, respect so much, find endlessly funny and interesting and inspiring — but they've been so generous with their lives and thoughts that there are other comedians & writers i'd never know 1/100th as well even after a three-hour dinner and their undivided attention, and i may selfishly, desperately want to. i say "may" because i don't really blame anyone who would prefer to live in ignorance about their favourite comedians & writers and just enjoy them through their work. sometimes i think that's how i feel about victoria; she's so witty and so smart and represents so much of what i respect about women in her industry that i love her to bits, but because her opinions can be so strong and even acerbic i'm intimidated by the reality that we may clash in some of our ways of thinking — and, selfishly, i don't necessarily want to face that. anyways—

if we were having dinner all of us together, i think it'd be nice to pick 3 people who are friends and would have a lot to talk about amongst themselves — since i'd mostly be there as a voyeur, or to ask a question to spurn on more stories. there are also comedians i'd pick in this scenario because they'd do much better amongst their own kind than a one on one with a normie...

do you ever regret asking me these kinds of questions bc my answers are always so long and qualified and boring like i type this shit out thinking "who would ever read all this or care even half as much just list the fucking comedians" im so sorry for who i am

...like, really, someone like alex horne...he'll be much better in a group, with his friends to play off of...but fock he's kinda hard to fit in with my other faves...

OKAY

i think for a group dinner i'd enjoy so much seeing catherine tate, lee mack, and david tennant. how epic would be that? the oldest of friends, who used to be in a group on the circuit as kids, and the long-time colleagues and icons, who have ruled tv culture with their talent and their charisma; three open, warm people, all legends in their own rights, with endless stories, who may not otherwise show lower-key sides of themselves. i'd sit at that table forever, i think, learning about the comedy scene, the acting scene, television and movies, how the industry circles have overlapped and evolved and helped and hurt. i could sit at that table forever, i think.

as for one on one dinners, it's too difficult not to say david mitchell (is that so predictable ╥﹏╥ ), who is someone who feels close but far; i think — apart from his love of history — he's offered many more scratched surfaces than deep dives, and i deeply appreciate the spectrum of his career and interests. i couldn't keep him too long because i don't think he appreciates going on and on about himself, and i'm sure i couldn't be too interesting, but man what an experience that would be no matter if it was just a short tea! otherwise, i would say sean lock and...as a kind of wild card...richard osman. i think a lot of people will relate to sean, just wanting to see him again, just wanting a moment of his humanity, his great balance between accepting the harsh and coping what we can. richard is a strikingly fascinating person — the younger brother of a famous rockstar and a massive comedy nerd who went on to become one of the richest comedy tv producers and now a crime author? talk about containing multitudes. he's been around for so long but really hasn't given much of himself away — i'm so curious about his life! and he seems such a polite, gentle, intelligent, insightful person, i think the conversation would just be so enlightening!

as you can imagine i have about 15 other people i'd be dying dying dying to have dinner with but i stuck with the prompt!!! sorry i was so word vomit about it >.<

the thing is julian has 0% dad energy — what he has is INTENSE rich childfree aunt energy. she’s gonna come around for dinner once in a while and wear that fake smile around the kids that makes it very obvious she’s not into them but is happy for you and talk about her recent trip to paris and after about two hours she has to leave 1) to go to the theatre but mostly 2) for her own sanity. as for lucy and sam, i saw an amazing exchange (i think on tiktok?? idr) discussing the quite serious difference at the foundations of james acaster’s and sam campbell’s comedy, since they’re being often erroneously compared, and someone made a point that went more or less like this: “the basis of james’ comedy is the fact he is a deeply angry, self-loathing and mentally ill person. sam is just a toddler who has had way too many lollipops.” and…that’s it. older sister lucy and younger brother sam have had too many lollies — you can even find some in their hair 🍭🍭

well you know what i watched an episode of pointless where THIS FUCKING CLUE got 86!!!!!!!!!! 14 people didn’t get sheep!!!!!!!!!!!!!! so frankly i don’t trust this audience anyways!!!!

hahaha no i just threw it together for that ask post that’s why it’s so sloppy 😂 you can use it if you want!

BONK

aw anon that's so nice! like i said, someone else made that action and i would love to know who (well, i know their name is ana, but have never found their blog in all these years) — the whole community is built on sharing resources and tips! hope you're having fun :')

get out of here!!! these were so sweet. thank you so much. to echo my answer to the anon before these, it's a huge community effort and the people who rip this content are my heroes. i'm happy you have some resources to help you smile and laugh 🥹

—

WATCH LINKS MASTERPOST / FAQ / TAGS / ASK

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sassykinzonline · 1 month

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Going off on a tangent (I’m lowkey obsessed with your blog so now I’m going to yell my thoughts at you)

I get so disappointed at the lack of any lore drops between Naruto’s heritages like obviously the uzamaki’s were exploited and basically had a like genocide (Karin’s backstory had me so fucked) and maybe it’s to show how normal it is in shinobi society to just brush anything under the rug when it comes to genocides and systemic issues which duh but I wish I could’ve seen more nuanced stuff like diaspora between the few survivors of lost clans, how they survived or heck how they try to preserve their culture.

Idk maybe I’m not making any sense but as someone who has like no ties to my origins (AA, especially growing up to ppl denying AA culture and how AA culture gets sold) I wished I saw that kind of relatability in Naruto since he himself is basically separated from his culture and didn’t even know who his parents were I feel like that could lead to some like deeper stuff. I feel like Naruto would try to preserve his cultures and clans (he does in way ig in boruto but I barely seen that anime and that’s a whole other discussion with how clans are treated)

And in a way I guess it’s the most realistic part of Naruto like yea the ppl in charge might give a nod in acknowledgement of how they were bystanders and that the system failed ppl (if they even go as far as to accept that) it’s just to make the ppl they exploit/ed shut up and be happy that they were even seen in the first place (working class, blm, Palestine, Native Americans etc)

But god do I wish Naruto dived into the isolation of the lack of culture or even the lack of your own ppl can have.

first of all thank you for your support and engagement, it gives joy. feel free to yell at me whenever, i have a naruto so im used to it.

this is also something that used to upset me and now just frustrates me. i technically wasnt the last uchiha until after the war, but itachi and i couldnt communicate, madara cut ties with the clan, and just like me obito left the village as a child. one of the worst things about the genocide was this crushing anxiety of "what will become of our history?" i was old enough to have pride in the concept of "uchiha" but too young to have a meaningful understanding of it. and i guess deep down thats what contributed to my steady depersonalization and increasing franticness-- i knew there was really nothing i could do to preserve my clan so at least i needed to preserve their honour (and this was also why i understand itachi's reasons for not sharing the truth).

all this to say, my heart breaks for naruto because he doesnt even know what he doesnt know. and like you said, thats mostly a function of how konoha chose to operate. i still dont understand why they couldnt at least tell naruto about his mom. i dont understand why jiraiya didnt come back to teach him sealing. but i do know why and its because the shinobi system works best if you dont see yourself as an individual first. everything you are and have needs to belong to the state, and if it doesnt, then they will eliminate it. konoha took advantage of the genocide in uzushio to essentially traffic their women and then say there was "friendship" between the two villages...then do nothing to preserve the uzumaki or uzushio history. disgusting.

youre making sense. ive actually thought that naruto's case is similar to children from asia who were trafficked and brought to western countries post-war, completely removed from their culture and often neglected and abused for a culture they couldnt even own. i think the uchiha are a bit similar to african americans given the systematic lack of consideration for contributions to the development of society, the war between respectability/assimilation and self-determination/anti-discrimination, and like you said the commodification and demonization of culture. and i do agree with you about naruto, but i think it also helps him sometimes. for better or for worse hes...simple. he doesnt think too much about things he doesnt know, and that helps him get through his days with less of a load. he does have his bad days, where hes...lost, but if he were any other way he wouldnt be naruto. luckily the boruto versions of us arent real, but even then i think they make sense given what they were trying to accomplish with that show (ie. dumb down everything for the Manly Men who didnt get what was happening the first time).

when i was traveling after the war i did try to do some preliminary investigation into existing uzumaki refugees and diaspora, but it was a bit difficult though due to their history. ive been thinking about putting together an extended campaign and mission for us to reunify the uzumaki, for his birthday. i just need to figure out how best to go about it. keep it a secret between us.

#ask #sasuke headcanons #naruto headcanons #naruto analysis #i guess?#anti konoha #anti shinobi system #thanks again for bringing joy to my morning

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ubercharge · 3 months

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im not sure if anyone asked you yet, but thoughts on the dunmeshi anime?

thanks for asking! sometimes i forget i exist here as a person cuz i just log on to queue random stuff without making posts 💀

it's pretty rare for me to watch an anime without ever reading the manga, and there've been stellar adaptations recently. ONK, kisekoi, BTR, frieren, CSM just to name a few. in a landscape where we're used to being disappointed as readers who have a frame of reference before watching a show, i had very, very high hopes for the dunmeshi adaptations that weren't quite fulfilled.

i'll dump everything under a cut since i actually have a lot to say, sorry if you were expecting it to be brief 😎

the lines in the artistic style are good, nicely translating the characters into animated format. really no notes there. definitely a nicer comparison for char designs between manga and anime vs. tonsuki and tensura who both have incredible manga styles that the anime stumble over (though in the latter's case, i don't think they were aiming for it sadly)

the shading has been fine, but weakened by the colour choices. some of the dungeon scenes (e.g., living armour stuff) are lit with a medium blue which helps to sell the idea of the scene being in a place not lit by fire (and contrasts it with the making camp & cooking scenes), but the lack of dark shading flattens some of these very well-drawn images.

the earlier chapters don't have the same level of detail as newer ones, but the art style is still fantastic - it's expressive with high contrast and shows action and impact perfectly well. manga will often times have a naturally easier way with contrast due to it being in black & white, but i don't think that means anime should just give up on contrast in favour of playing ineffectively with colour.

here's a night shot of fern from frieren. the choices made here allow for the shading to stand out from the flats and give her more definition overall while still being relatively simple (just flats + shading)

when dunmeshi has more "normal" lighting conditions, it does a lot better. similar to fern up there, there's about the same amount of difference between the flats and shadows, so i really wish they did a better job on the dungeon scenes since they're going to have to deal with non-torchlit scenes plenty. i won't argue that the living armor scene certainly has some kind of a sickly, alien mood to it, but tl;dr i think it should've had darker shading if not also being less green. this largely applies to every other blue-green lit scene they've done.

looking at kui's coloured drawings in the ed gives me an idea of what could've been and it makes me sad to lose out on colour choices more similar to that (even if they obviously can't have her level of detail on top of it)

some of the backgrounds haven't been too interesting but some have been good, overall it's probably fine. plus you can only draw and detail repeating bricks so many times before the viewer gets bored of looking at them anyway, i guess.

the animation is really fun and expressive. it's trigger, so they don't keep scenes stiffly on-model when they want characters moving around. this is good because it helps to sell both action and comedy moments!

the music overall i haven't really cared for? the BGM has not been particularly moving, interesting, or memorable - mostly generic. and i've seen too many fantasy shows for my own good, so i might be harder to impress (but i even remember tenken had a good BGM song or two to make a fight dramatic and that show was barely above average at best)

i'm biased not being particularly into bump, so i would've selected a different artist for the OP (i actually did like the bump OP from SxF though, come to think of it). before anyone makes a wisecrack based on what i've watched lately, no it doesn't have to be yoasobi.

i maybe feel the ED song would've been better for the OP, i don't like the largely peaceful bit of the OP with very still visuals. the OP is where you reel people in! it should be an eye-catching hook, representative of what to expect with some extra sauce on top.

the ED is great, total bop. it's a fine time for slower visuals as an enjoyable wind-down from the episode, so less or no animation is no big deal. plus kui's art is absolutely gorgeous! it all perfectly fits that "end of work" fun and lighthearted mood they were going for.

i largely enjoy the voice acting. i would've personally gone for a less "old man" voice on senshi because he's really not that old for a dwarf, but they obviously wanted to make it clear he was the older, wiser, knowledgeable character.

this might be my own personally most blasphemous opinion, but i would've picked a different VA for falin. i want to make it clear i absolutely adore saori hayami - she's incredible and one of my faves. with that said, her voice fits the character, so maybe it's just because i've heard her too often which is not her fault by any means! i love the voices for laios, marcille, and chil.

it seems netflix's subs go off of the official EN TL of the manga, which makes sense, but i've talked about how i don't like it more than ehscans' TL (which is one of the single best TLs i've read for a series, official or otherwise) and that holds true for the anime ("mad sorcerer" is cooler AND less clunky than "lunatic magician"). i prefer less localisation stuff and/or quirkiness in my subs and more direct translation for both manga and anime.

as for the changes/additions they've made to the show, some of them have been alright and some i didn't care for. they really want to sell marcille as the funny joke character which is why they had her being chased by the basilisk instead of having doni & fionil like it was in the manga which was better for the pacing and had good impact vs a funny clip of marcille running back and forth.

i don't dislike when adaptations add or change stuff, but placing them cleanly is important. dunmeshi is already really funny! i don't think it needs help being funnier by reaching for the cheap laugh. when laios sees two people running for their lives from a basilisk and he just goes "wow that's a bad way to run from that monster", it's already lowkey hilarious - all the more so followed by marcille telling mr. monster-know-it-all to go rescue them if he knows what's up and him rescuing them by making himself big and chicken squawking real loud (which embarrasses marcille and chil, but c'mon guys, at least his idea worked!). i feel like the comedy in laios' funny hero moment is undercut by forcing the marcille butt of the joke moment in the anime.

dunmeshi is already incredibly good at just about everything it does. i feel if an adaptation wants to add or change something, it's often better amplifying a strength or shoring up a weakness in the source material. BTR adds a lot to the source (not hard considering the source is a 4koma) and makes already funny things even funnier. the "we should all get social media" scene is elevated to iconic status with the visual of bocchi glitching out + the VA's inhuman screech. i can't say where i'd really want to change or add stuff to dunmeshi, since it really feels so good and whole, but i'm sure there's room in the process of translating manga panels to animated scenes, and i think the direction overall could've been better (comparing most shows to BTR isn't fair i know because BTR is directed & adapted so well it's hydrogen bomb vs. coughing baby territory)

i've mostly said negative stuff, but i don't want it to sound like i hate or even really dislike the adaptation. i think when it comes to a series you really love, you want to see the best adaptation possible within reason, and the disappointment of stuff not being quite what you were hoping for is amplified by so many other recent adaptations being so good.

dunmeshi does not have a bad anime by any means, but a lot of that is thanks to the source material's quality. if they do another season, i hope they have more time/budget/whatever because i think a lot of the parts it does have are good parts! but in this case, i wasn't hoping for good; i was hoping for great.

trigger makes great shows with wacky storylines (in some ways, the same one wacky storyline, but that's a different discussion) and dunmeshi, being directed by someone who's worked on a bunch of trigger stuff (largely sci-fi leaning), maybe needed some more direction from people who've worked on fantasy stuff? i can't say for sure what would've been enough to take the show over the top, but though i generally don't hope for much from adaptations, i really did have higher hopes for this one than it ended up achieving.

overall it seems i'll end up scoring the show a 7 or 7.5 when i finish the season, though there's certainly still room to wow us all. whatever you feel about the adaptation, whether you liked it or not, whether or not you've read the manga, feel free to comment your thoughts below or in my inbox. let's keep it free of manga spoils for anime-only watchers, though!

#sorry this is REALLY long #ask answer #anon #i've been busy with TEA in ffxiv but i'll try to post more!

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lumineescente · 7 months

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seungjin drabble (slowtober)

hii im doing a thing called slowtober (made by @/oeildesaturne on instagram, french speaking folks check it out!! although be aware of tw mental health and eds talks) and i'm posting on twitter a seungjin au per word

for the third word of this slowtober we got "mixture"

For this word i just HAD TO (no but yes) make a little hogwarts au... I genuinely tried to think about anything else but my dear hogwarts au it got longer than expected and TO BE HONEST I COULD GO ON!!!!!! i could write all this!! hogwarts au are my favorite

not betaed this is just for fun <3

and if you want to read a seungjin hogwarts au from me you can check this already posted fic!

AND if you enjoyed this challenge who is now over you can vote on this form for your favorite that I’ll be writing into a full fic on ao3! (“soumettre” is “submit” btw)

if you want to check all the drabbles you can go here

"Did it work?" Seungmin pouts staring at the potion in front of him.

The mixture's liquid looks decent, the forms of the steam above it looks like the kind of description their teacher made during class earlier, but something is off. He looks back to the recipe, knowing very well he has not missed a step because he is always very diligent with his work and also because Hyunjin was checking after him, but still. He checks.

"I think it did," Hyunjin answers after getting close to the potion. His cheeks coloured in pink. Seungmin does not notice.

"You think or you're sure? Those are two different things."

Seungmin smells the potion. This is what is wrong with it. It smells nothing. And the smell is surely the most important thing about this potion. It has to smell like things the person smelling loves. Seungmin expected to smell old books, something homey, maybe that pie Hogwarts serves during Halloween. But all he can smell is Hyunjin's perfume because the latter is so close to him right now, hovering over his shoulder. And to be honest they've spent so much time together lately, Seungmin feels like the perfume has penetrated his own skin.

One thing to know about Seungmin is that he hates not understanding. He will ask questions, make the researches, works the extra time if he has to. But he will get it. Whatever it might be. Usually it is school works, because ever since he has entered Hogwarts it had been his priority (obsession some might said). In exchange he keeps on being the best student, one of them at least, except in potions. Which makes no sense because potions surely is one of the most rational subject they have. Follow the instructions. Choose the right ingredients. Dont miss a step. And follow again the instructions.

The things Seungmin should be the best at! Not that he does not succeed. He just does not succeed enough. And Seungmin really wants to be a healer at St Mungo, he does not need to be good at potions. He needs to be excellent.

Except he is not and apparently books could only tell as much as they can - the disappointment he had felt upon noticing that is still indescribable - so he had gone to the only option left. Ask for help. Slytherin this year were no exception to the unspoken rule of them being the best in potions, in the person of Hwang Hyunjin who was mostly knows for his quidditch skills (Seungmin had had many opportunities to admire... notice those skills through the years).

Another thing about Seungmin is that he definitely lacks people skills, and because Ravenclaw do not share their potion class with Slytherin, he had no reason to ask Hyunjin for help. He knew from other shared times that Hyunjin is a very nice and approachable person, only has the looks of the mean cliché Slytherin but he's heard one day one of his friends telling him he could have been sorted at Hufflepuff and he agrees. Because when Seungmin suddenly showed up and ask for help to that boy he has barely talked to all their years, the boy smiled and said of course.

All that happened last year. When they were studying for their O.W.L.S and Seungmin wanted to make sure he got a O. And he got it because Hyunjin was a very good teacher, very patient, nice and funny. Even if he would often stumble on his words, somehow always made his point very clear. Plus he knew Hyunjin made space for him in his schedule which was already busy with quidditch practices, so for that Seungmin was grateful.

By the end of the year Seungmin knew he had made a friend. Which had not been the case since his first year. This plus the O.W.L.s results, his fifth year was a success. He really thought it would be the end of their lessons but it was Hyunjin who came back to him and asked him if he wanted to continue. He said yes because he genuinely enjoyed it and, if he was being honest with himself, he was scared he would have no reason to hang out with Hyunjin if not. And he really liked hanging out with Hyunjin.

This is how they ended up making amortentia from scratch on a Tuesday evening, because Seugmin completely failed making the mixture during his class in the morning.

"I'm sure it worked," Hyunjin insists, "everything seems fine."

"I cant smell anything," Seungmin tells him.

Hyunjin frowns, "get closer."

Seungmin does so, even if it is useless. He takes a deep breath it but once again all he can smell is Hyunjin's perfume. Floral, probably with lavender undertones, and a bit overwhelming at first but comforting. He shakes his head.

"Do you smell anything?" He asks his surrogate teacher.

This time he does notice the blush on Hyunjin's face.

"I do," he mutters.

Seungmin's never been a really into gossiping, he hates personal question about himself so he does not pry.

"Well, that does not make any sense," he mumbles almost to himself, "go away for a bit, please."

"What?" Hyunjin chokes up.

"I didnt mean it like that... just can you go to the other side of the room so I can focus."

If the request is odd to Hyunjin he does not protest it and do as told. Seungmin stares at the pretty forms the steam makes above the pearly mixture for a moment, deep into focusing on his senses. He closes his eyes to make sure of it. Hyunjin is not in his personal space anymore so there is no reason for his perfume to linger that much, at least he hopes so. He gets closer and closer to the potion but his nose only picks up the same scent over and over. When he opens his eyes back he is frustrated and it probably shows.

"What's going on?" Hyunjin asks him, worry in his voice tone.

"Its just all I can smell is your perfume and I dont get..."

He stops his sentence when he sees the look on Hyunjin's face, the way his blush expanded and his eyes were round. There is a moment of silence during which Seungmin is not really sure what switches in the air what kind of tension gets itself comfortable between them, nor why does it mean. Things in their relationship have always been very easy, even with Seungmin struggling in social interactions, even during the very first lesson Hyunjin had easily broken the glass between them and made Seungmin very comfortable. There is no overthinking when he is with him. It is so relaxing, so freeing.

"Seungmin," Hyunjin eventually says and it is obvious he is trying to suppress a smile on his lips, "you're the smartest person I know... but..."

Seungmin opens his mouth to protest whatever is coming after the "but".

Hyunjin shakes his head and comes back to his previous place, close, very close to Seungmin. It shuts him up because suddenly everything is different.

He sees the look in Hyunjin's eyes, the way their hands could brush against each other if they decided to, and Seungmin is paralyzed.

"I think the potion works very well because I can smell the scent of old books in the library and sugar quills."

This time Seungmin feels himself blushing. Hyunjin always buys for him sugar quills if he goes to honeydukes without him, because Seungmin likes them so much. They are basically just sugar but the way they taste and feel are very calming somehow. He has never really thought a lot about Hyunjin's actions, just categorized him as the nice kind of persons who care a lot about everything and remember little stuff. He never thought it was something special. Just something endearing about Hyunjin like so many things.

"Uh.." he clears his throat. He never is at loss of words, he knows so many words!

Hyunjin smirks and Seungmin tries to look away but Hyunjin is too close and he is everywhere in his personal space and field of vision. It is overwhelming but he does not not like it. He just does not know how to respond to it. And he is still not sure he understands it. While Hyunjin seems to understand everything. That is embarrassing.

"I really thought I was obvious and that you were acting like it was nothing because you were being polite and you didnt want to embarrass me..."

Hyunjin is slightly taller than him, he has noticed, just a few centimeters really nothing in their day to day life but right now as Hyunjin very carefully moves his head closer to Seungmin's, he feels so tiny.

"But you were just very oblivious !" Hyunjin concludes with a smile, "because you are so smart, I never thought it could be that."

"Book smart and emotions smart are different things," he breathes out.

Hyunjin laughs and it makes Seungmin's heart race. He always seems to manage to make Hyunjin laughs so brightly like that, when he has never been known to be a particularly funny person.

"That's right," Hyunjin tells him, "so I'm going to ask you then. Seungmin, do you, perhaps, like me more than just a friend?"

Seungmin knows very well that his entire face is red by now, "I never.. thought about it," he confesses.

Hyunjin smiles very gently, "I did. I actually thought about it so much I lost sleep over it because all I could think about was you and how much I like you."

Seungmin's ears are ringing and he can only hear the loud beating of his own heart, "you did..."

Hyunjin once again looks at him with those doe beautiful gentle eyes and smiles softly and Seungmin feels like he is both melting and burning.

"This might be a bit overwhelming, so..." Hyunjin says and his voice is a little less confident than before, "maybe you can think about it and I can take you out on a date this Saturday at hogsmeade... and if you dont like me then I'll never bother you again with my feelings."

"That's.... thats a very good idea."

The face Hyunjin makes is better than any academic success, Seungmin thinks.

#seungjin #seungjin drabbles #kpop drabbles #slowtober #writetober #fanfiction #stray kids drabble #skz drabbles #kim seungmin #hwang hyunjin #drabble #hogwarts au #harry potter au #luminee:slowtober challenge

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nobodywritingao3 · 2 months

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i feel kind of sick making this post so please excuse me if i sound like a rambling mess. i am not the type of person to talk in detail about my life in online places cuz i live in fear of this getting back to my abuser but shubble's story punched all my most sensitive spots and i want to talk about it

(really long sensitive post)

ive gotten kind messages from people that i havent responded to. the idea of responding to people individually kind of makes me feel sick. so im doing this instead. and im also going to vent really hard because i am not doing well and talking about this to my therapist is soul crushingly embarrassing because wilbur soot is a minecraft man and im a freshly turned 20 year old who pays rent and is respected by my therapist and i dont want to admit that i wrote fanfic about a 30 year old white boy i discovered in quarantine when i was 15. can you imagine that conversation? id have to explain what the dream smp is.

when i watched shubble's video for the first time, i was in total disbelief. i couldnt believe that wilbur soot had done these things but i knew that the liklihood of it being anyone else was pretty low. i chose to hope that the story was not about him, and that if it was that he was a reformed abuser who had reorganized his value system and respected his partners now. i had a lot expectations. then he released his statement and i was horrified. i was disappointed and kind of in denial. his statement was worse than anything i had prepared for as 'worst case scenario.' as time has passed my denial has mostly dulled but im ashamed and im embarassed and im badly triggered.

i kind of hysertically hoped that it was a sick prank that shubble and wilbur cooked up and would get horribly cancelled for, but its not a prank, theres no "haha sike" moment, and wilbur abused shelby.

his response undid me because i saw so much of my own abuse in the words he used.

abusers are really good at making people take a centrist "two sides to every story" stance. i dont know how to describe this to people who have never been abused, but i will do my best

most people are taught that when theres an argument between two people, both parties carry some amount of blame and if you want to resolve that issue, it's a good idea to look at your part in the dynamic. we're also taught to keep our disagreements between ourselves and to not involve other people in our drama.

these are sensible sentiments, but abusers are very good at manipulating these sentiments.

when a victim speaks up for themselves and they call someone an abuser, what they are saying is: "this person cruelly bullied me and hurt me and exerted control over me that i did not deserve or ask for or elicit."

that's a heavy accusation and it contradicts sentiments we are taught like "it takes two to tango" and "dont involve others with your relationship drama."

many abusers are charismatic people. id even say most. when you hear this accusation about someone you think is really cool, your natural instinct is to ask for their side of the story.

they will tell you some version of this:

"i am shocked and hurt that she would call me an abuser. we've been having relationship problems recently, and sometimes i lose my temper. im not proud of that. ive done a lot of things im not proud of. it's true that i did [insert played down act of violence] to her, but you wouldnt believe the horrible things she was saying to me. i lost control, and im so ashamed of myself."

this version of events makes the abuser seem reasonable, it makes the victim seem irrational and quick to blame and hysterical

from here, a lot of people will nod thoughtfully and go. "yeah. yeah. that makes sense. everyone has a unique perspective. the fact that shes attributing all the blame to him without recognizing her own flaws and contributions to the relationship while he does shows that hes the reasonable one here. hes such a chill guy. the things shes saying dont make sense at all. i probably wont say it to her face, but i think shes in the wrong."

wilbur's response hit all the beats im familiar with. it was so in line with everything my abuser used against me, and in line with what ive heard other victims say their abusers used against them, and in line with examples ive read and witnessed and had countless psychiatrists walk me through that reading it was like getting hit by a train.

the hope that i carried with me through that week was that wilbur was a reformed abuser. but reading that response gave me the gut wrenching confirmation that he wasnt.

thinking about it too much literally makes me sick and shaky in a way i havent experienced since my own abuser tracked me down the first time and gave me a beautifully wrapped gift. with my abuser, i had several years trapped with him where all the love i felt for him disappeared and was replaced by total hatred for everything he put me through. i wasnt expecting this from wilbur at all, and i feel fucking sick because this was a man i sincerely admired and looked up to a lot. i really liked wilbur soot. he released that response and this image in my head that i had of him was tainted by the memories of my abuser.

im reminded of one event several years ago where i was choked. i tried to ask for help but everyone who knew immediately reached out to him and asked for "his side of the story." i dont want to talk about what he did to me after that. all that matters is that in the end, no one believed me. everyone took his side over mine and insisted that i was lying or exaggerating or trying to get attention or trying to make him look bad. people who i loved and thought would always be there for me sent me paragraph long text messages calling me a bitch and a cunt. the person i loved the most in the world told me that i was out of line and said point blank that they were sorry, but couldnt believe me over the person who choked me. i had never felt so alone.

ive been having a rough time. i confided in a friend who is trying to escape his abusive husband, and he gently told me that this might mean i have "a type," meaning im naturally drawn to people who are abusive. after i escaped, i took a lot of solace in the fact that i was inspired so much by wilbur soot. i thought he was progressive and stood up for womens rights and was anti bigotry and all those lovely good things. this man i admired so much was the image of healthy, nonviolent, kind masculinity. finding out he isnt has made me question myself and my own judgment and it's making me wonder if the people i let in my life and the people im drawn to are people who i subconsciously know will hurt me.

as of now, its been a year and a half since i escaped my abusive family at 18 years old. i turned 20 like half a second ago. the past 18 months of my life have been devoted to looking into legal protection, getting therapy to undo nearly 2 decades worth of ptsd, trying to keep all my baggage to myself because i dont want to burden my friends anymore than i have, and holding down a steady job so that i can afford rent without having to rely on the parents of my friends to house and feed me and keep my location secret from an insane group of people who reeeeally want me to come back even tho im pretty sure one of them might """""accidentally"""" kill me one day

i feel ashamed and embarrassed by being this affected by wilbur soot. parasocial relationships are looked down upon and i feel like the perfect stereotype of a hysterical, delusional teenager / young lady finding out that her hero is "a flawed human being, just like you and me - seriously, what did you expect?!"

i already see people jumping to his defense, although i try to look away because that is also extremely triggering for me.

it is hard not to acknowledge wilbur's humanity, and i want to clarify that i do feel compassion for the amount of death threats, doxing, and isolation he is undoubtedly experiencing right now. no matter what you do, i dont believe that retributive justice or revenge is a proactive, sane response. i am sincerely worried that he will either try to kill himself as a last ditch attempt for sympathy OR that he will actually just kill himself from the public shaming. i do not want him to experience a mental health crisis and i do not want him to die, even tho he has horribly disappointed me and reminded me of so many bad things

this was kind of an insane post. im ready for it to get 1 note and then experience a horrifying amount of embarrassment as i realize that people read this and know disgusting amounts about me as a person, but i want to share my experience as someone who has been abused. i want to offer solace to people who are in the same boat and possibly reach someone who might have otherwise believed wilbur was telling the truth.

i want to end this post on a positive note, so im going to share some naive hope ive been repeating to myself for the past few days

i hope that people believe shubble. i hope she finds comfort and compassion and healing. i hope she can internalize that what happened to her was not her fault. i hope she lives a happy life surrounded by people who see her and care about her

i hope that the people close to wilbur make him confront this side of himself. i hope he fixes his abuse problem and reorganizes his values. i hope his network of people is strong enough not to abandon him entirely but to intervene and make him work on himself. i hope he stays alive and i hope that he becomes an advocate for abused women

this was cheesy and unrealistic but ive been sending my hope into the universe and trying not to shut down because i dont know what else to do and my two hours of government issued weekly ptsd therapy is already devoted to the horrible things i experienced firsthand

anyway

as far as my fanfiction goes???? i dont fucking know.

im not going to delete it. im definitely taking a break and at least stepping into a pause so i can properly reflect on what to do in the meantime. as a musician and writer and creative in general, i was inspired by many aspects of wilbur soot for years and i need a second to chill out and get a hold of myself

maybe ill complete my work. if i do ill upload the finished products in one go and probably orphan them. and maybe delete my ao3 account. god knows at this point

i am still cringing so hard at myself for making this post. it's very emotional and i try to sell myself as serious, intellectual person. maybe this post will be received great or badly or just be ignored. in any case ill be embarrassed so it doesnt really matter how anyone feels about me after this. if you took the time to read, thank you for hearing me out. and if you didnt, im glad that i got a little catharsis

#wilbur soot #im embarassed of myself #whatever #wilbur situation #shubble supprt #cw domestic violence #i feel sick after typing this #this was basically a diary entry #tldr wilbur soot reminds me of my own experience of abuse and i think i wanna throw up #cw abuse #oh god goodnight everyone #i have read peoples compassionate messages to me and im very thankful for them #it has been very sweet and helpful cuz this isnt smth i share to my offline friends so i havent gotten my usual support and affection #thank you to people who are being nice to me

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