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slayingqueenchal · 1 year

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All because of a silly little niffler, and a necklace| James Potter x f!reader

Reader is Slytherin, the same year as James, James pulls a big prank to snape but instead, you got it and everyone's making fun of you. Somehow reader is muggleborn in slytherin, cheesy love story, no smut

"Y/n, can you open this box for me? " Severus asked, giving you a very bright yellow and red box, that's moving.

"Fine" You were tired of severus's 'can you's' so you might as well do it.

Inside. A niffler jumped at you and you fell to the floor. It took your necklace off, a very special necklace to you, and you can hear laughs already, as the niffler walked across your body.

A boy named Regulus catched it and a first year helped him put it in the box, seems like they were the only one's who actually has a heart.

"Wasn't me" Severus puts his hands up and laughed. All this because you were a 'mudblood' as they say it. You were a muggleborn, but, clearly better than the pureblood maniacs. Even Severus is not a pureblood, he's a halfblood and treating hisself like he's one of the Black's.

You stood up and ran outside of the common room, even outside, you can hear people chiming in 'y/n the mudblood, is she gonna cry'. You've never seen nor heard Slytherin be this evil.

You didn't know were your feet was bringing you , but you walked, and walked, and walked, and bumped into someone.

"I'm sorry! " You put your hands down, to show your bright red face of sadness, but mostly embarrassment.

"Uhm, y/n, right, uhh, what's wrong? " A guy asks. Messy hair, glasses. Well, his voice too, was iconic, James Potter. The guy your fancied since year one, you were suprised that he even knew your name. Well you sniffed, just like a niffler and wiped your tears, you were more embarrassed now.

"Severus told me to open this box, and there was a niffler and It took my necklace, and plus, all the Slytherin's were laughing at me! " You cringed at the moment, remembering when many slytherins laughed, mostly the purebloods.

"Snivel-- snape? H-how dare he? " James stuttered. "James.. Don't tell me it's one of your pranks? " You asked him, disappointed, but honestly not surprised.

"Uh-uhm, I'm sorry, yes, but I swear I'll find you the necklace! And do things to snape, im sorry! " He said. "Oh.. James.. Well, you said sorry, and i guess it's fine, I can buy myself a new one.. Later" You said. If you hadn't fancied him for years, you would've screamed at him and made him pay back but, he is James Potter.

"How much is it? The necklace, of course" James asked. "Sixty galleons, I know you might laugh at me for crying at a sixty gall-" He cuts you off "sixty?! Sixty?! Oh my Lord, y/n I'm sorry! Can I buy you a new one, or-or something? " James eyes lit up.

"No, it's fine.. James, you didn't meant it, I mean it was severus's fault, and uhm, I need to go now, James, have a goodnight! " You faked your smile.

Walking down to the halls, you were sad about your necklace, you loved it. It glows yellow if you're happy, blue if you're sad, red if you're mad, pink if you're adoring something or someone, purple if you're confused, and green if you're sick.

You walked to the common room, in hope to find the box and Regulus, but just to get told that after you left, the niffler left too.

Well, you got to bed, sick to your stomach that you declined 60 galleons, and humiliated yourself, in front of the whole common room and james.

The next day was worst, you got a nickname 'y/n the sniffing niffler'. It was getting worst that you left your food almost untouched.

A week passed by, you didn't go Hogsmeade, cause you've seen everything there, and it's not like you can afford many things there.

You instead enjoyed reading some books, the fantastic beast, while drinking tea. You enjoyed the quietness and the weirdness of the creature's.

Until that peace was disturbed by the sound of someone running. "Y/n, you can't believe it, I've been searching you all day! " It was James.

"James Potter, looking for me, what? " You looked at him confused. "Y/n I'm sorry about your necklace, I found the niffler and.. It chewed it up" James said, his chest going up and down after all thw running.

"As expected, that's alright, James" You looked at your book back. "No, uhm-y/n, I bought you a necklace, from the same exact shop" James said. You looked at him, and there he had it, a similar necklace, thats shining pink.

"James, oh my gosh! " It felt as if you were the happiest person in the world. "Thankyou so so so much! " You stood up and hugged him, dramatic and cheesy, but you just had the urge to. Imagine getting a necklace from the guy you had a crush on for years, and imagine him putting it on to you, well, you don't need to imagine now.

He puts the necklace on to you. "Beautiful, as always" He smiled. The necklace gleamed yellow and pink. Well, around him the necklace is always yellow and pink, mostly pink.

"Seems like you adore me, don't you little thing? " James grinned. "How did you know, wait, no! I'm happy! Do you even know what pink means? " You asked him, stuttering.

"Oh, love, you must know that everyone who buys it gets clear instructions of what the colors means, right?" James grinned.

"See James, the problem is that uhm, it's pink because.. " You paused, immediately regretting what you just said. "Because? " James shot an 'innocent' eye to you.

"Oh geez, James you know it, ive liked you since first year" You looked down. "You can take it back if your disgusted of me, resell it or something" .

"Look at me, love" He said. James, has this special power that makes you do whatever he says, and you looked at him.

He smashed your lips into yours, while holding your chins up to him. Softly and gently, you two pulled away. "Mhm, I think we both know I like you back and you're keeping the necklace forever. Y/n y/l/n, the most beautiful, and nicest girl I've met, would you like to be my girlfriend? " James looks at you dead in the eye. You of course said yes.

This evening was not what he expected, he expected you to take the necklace and leaves, but, this is way better obviously.

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avalil18 · 3 months

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You were right

Summary: you and Joe get into a fight because you know joes hand isn’t a hundred percent but Joe is being stubborn

Warnings: angst (fluff at end)

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It was around 7pm in Cincinnati and you were getting dinner ready for you and Joe. You were in the kitchen making salmon and vegetables for Joe and a salad and chicken for you since you hate fish. Joe was in the couch watching ESPN on his phone. While making your salad Joe walks into the kitchen and gives you a kiss on the cheek then goes around the island to sit in one of the stools. You look up at him and smile and say “dinner is almost ready!” “Great!I’m starving.” Joe says. “Haha good!” You say back. “So I was thinking since my hand is getting better and I was thinking of playing the game against the Dolphins.” Joe says. You look up at him surprised since you haven’t heard anything of his doctor clearing him to play. “But Joe you aren’t cleared to play yet.” You say kinda confused. “Well my physical therapist says I’m mostly ready to play and just talk to Zac about it.” Joe answers back. “And what did Zac say?” You ask. “He says if I feel ready to play then give it a shot but to not push my self if I’m not ready.” Joe says. “Oh! Ok.” You say kinda worried. “What? I know that face and that tone something’s wrong.”Joe says. Joe can read you very well and knows when something’s up even without you giving any emotion. “Just, forget it.” You say kinda worried what Joe will say because you know he wants to play but you fear he isn’t ready and you don’t want to disappoint him with what you are going to say. “Tell me y/n. You know you can tell me anything baby.” Joe says. “Well I just don’t know if you are ready Joe. You said your physical therapist says you are mostly ready and that’s just mostly ready not a hundred percent. I just don’t think you should go into a game not a hundred percent that’s all.” You say while mixing your salad. “So you don’t think I’m ready?” Joe says kinda surprised on what you just said thinking that you would be happy. “I thought you would be happy that I can play.” Joe says. “I am Joe! But I just don’t feel like you are a hundred percent yet.” You say as you look up at him. “You winced today at your hand when you tried to throw the ball to rocky and did you even talk to your other doctors to make sure you can play?” You asked. “I just didn’t stretch it out that’s all. And I did they said if I feel ok and Zac says it’s ok it’s fine.” Joe says. “Do you think I should sit this one out?” He asks. “Honestly babe yeah I think you should just to be safe.” You say. “But y/n I feel fine! And just because I winced doesn’t mean it’s still bad. And Zac and my doctors told me it’s fine so I’m doing it,ok?” Joe kinda said in a tone that threw you off. Joe doesn’t really raise his voice or use a tone so when he does which is very rare and not really at you, you tend to feel a little taken back and a little sad you upset him or something or someone accidentally upset him. As those words left his mouth you felt a little taken back and of course sad that you made him use a tone and you said “ok Joe you go out on the field but I swear Joe if you get hurt.” You say kinda mad he hasn’t really processed what you are trying to tell him. “I will go on that field y/n. Im sorry you feel that way but I’m going on that field whether you like it or not.” Joe says being stubborn. “Fine!” You say back in a tone meaning you didn’t want to get in to a worse argument. “Fine” Joe answers back. After a couple moments of silence and you putting the food on both plates for you and Joe you hand Joe his plate. “Thanks” he says without even looking at you. You don’t say anything back and right when you sit down next to him with your plate in hand Joe gets up and says “I’m going to my office to eat and catch up on game Plays.” He says with out looking back and running down stairs with a humph. “Ok” you say without looking at him either. Once you hear his office door close you drop your fork on your plate and let out your tears. You hold your face in your hands and just cry. You had a long day and weren’t up for this nonsense so you just cried it out. You knew joe had a long day to and wasn’t up for arguing either.

You know has been eager to play again which made him be so stubborn about his decision to play right away. You couldn’t blame him for being excited but you knew he would get hurt and not to your surprise he did.

——-

The night after the game

You helped Joe get in bed and you went to the bathroom to wash up and change into pjs. You walked back into yours and joes big bedroom wearing your navy pjs and glasses. “Hey”Joe said like he had something on his mind as you climbed into bed. Joe was in a cast again on his right hand so he couldn’t really move it. “Hi!” you say. “Look y/n I should have listened to you I was being stupid and so eager to get on that field and play the game I wasn’t thinking about the person who always knows what’s right for me and the person I love most in this world. So I’m sorry y/n. I’m sorry for not listening. I hope you can forgive me.” Joe says in an apologetic way. “It’s ok Joe!” You say putting your hand on his face. “I know you were excited to get back out there. But you have to also listen to people who want to help you get better and I know your mom said the same thing I said because I have been talking to her this whole week about you playing. And I do forgive you. I wasn’t really madJoe just sad you weren’t listening to people who want to be there for you. Ok?” You say giving him a peck on the lips. I know is should have listened to both you and mom. I love you y/n thank you for always being my number 1 supporter and always being there for me when I’m being a dick. Joe says with a laugh. “You’re not a dick Joey! Don’t say that! And I love you too!” You say with a laugh.”Yes ma’am!” Joe says.

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The end!

#joe burrow

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nerves-nebula · 28 days

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the thing is i dont even feel very much right now. mostly numb with a little bit of sadness, a little bit of anger, but just a little. like, i guess i'm mad but i don't feel it much right now. just a little bit bitter i guess. i think it's cuz my fears were proven right, so i'm not even super surprised. i tell myself this basically every day. it's just, idk, disappointing to realize it was real and not a symptom of depression. not surprising tho! since my depression reminds me of it every day :)

i can tell i'm gonna have some kind of public breakdown soon. i keep getting visibly triggered in public. i'll sit in class and feel this heartbreaking rage roiling in me. i keep repeating phrases. i had to step out to pace in an angry circle for some reason recently. it's gonna happen soon and it's gonna be awkward cuz i've got a group project going on right now.

im listening to ghosting by mother mother cuz like, obviously. it was the first thing that popped into my mind hahhh. im only up so late because i have homework and i was too exhausted to get it done earlier. wooo.

#nnstuff #rambling #vent #and this is why i have decidedddddddd

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mysteriousboo · 5 months

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(SPOILERS FOR THE SHOW)

im genuinely surprised when i found out that people in the yr fandom give simon so much shit and for what? trying to protect himself from getting hurt when wilhelm denied that it was him in the video after he PROMISED simon that he wouldn’t do that? or trying to move on from wilhelm? when simon got into dealing booze or stealing drugs from his dads, he suffered because of his actions! his friends(rosh and ayub) stopped talking to him, he couldn’t pay for the personal tuition and his mom and sara found out about it and were obviously very mad at him! sara got into manor house, made friends and mostly had a good time in the majority of the second season while she was basically betraying simon’s trust by not telling him who leaked the video and using that fact to get into manor house plus sleeping with the person who recorded and released the video! personally, i don’t think her character can be redeemed in s3! but i see people trying to defend her more than they will with simon and that’s very sad!

or the fact that even wilhelm didn’t have to suffer at the aftermath of the video cause he denied that it was him in the video! i mean, we all know that the internet sucks! imagine, the things simon had to read! and people want him to forgive wilhelm just cause he said he loves him?? i mean how can he trust him? does he not have self-respect? my poor boy prolly thought that he would only be hurt more cause if wilhelm can deny his existence now, why won’t he do it in the future? or how serious is wilhelm’s love for him if he can deny their relationship so easily after he PROMISED that he would do no such thing! or the fact that wilhelm’s doesn’t even apologize to him properly, clearly not realizing how much he hurt simon! i mean the guy keeps asking simon to be his secret? how can simon agree to that? notice how in the first half s2 it’s not that simon denies that he loves wilhelm, it’s more like how can i trust you? and he was right wasn’t he? wilhelm knew that august released the video but proceeds to once again make the choice for simon and keep him in the dark! i’m not saying that he didn’t redeem himself in the latter half of the season! but it definetely felt like only simon felt the repercussions of his actions! both Sara and Wille just got away! and august the guy who should have gone to jail was being rewarded by being the backup or getting the girl! simon definetely sufffered more than august and the fact that some people in the fandom still are annoyed by him is just really disappointing! atleast have a reasonable explanation for finding simon annoying or not a fun character! I mean if you can understand Sara’s action then simon deserves the same! i am not trying to say that simon isn’t at fault, im just saying that why are you harsher towards his character not towards sara, wille, or august!

also, can we not forget that marcus literally gaslights simon into not breaking up with him! like my guy can’t catch a break! i hope that simon gets to be happy in s3! even though he has to deal with his sister basically lying to him the ENTIRE FUCKING TIME!!!! my god, i just want both my boys to be happy!

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birdsareblooming · 7 months

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god i wanted to be positive about sonic superstars because i am about every sonic game, especially with how still negative everything around sonic games can be. It's visually stunning and they actually tried something new with the areas instead of green hill reskins, at least mostly. but im confident i'm not choosing to be negative and picking anything to be mad about.

the game is infuriating to play. when just running through the levels as sonic it's mostly okay, but later boss fights ESPECIALLY for trip's story you have to play more than perfectly, and even if you play frame perfect the game will fuck you over via lack of planning. A blue missile just won't show up on your screen or in a way that's reachable. multiple of final boss fang's attacks are one-hit kills, which wouldn't be so bad if all of these boss fights weren't 5-10 minute long segments, where if you die at the end to some bullshit you have to go back to the very beginning. this includes Fang in golden city, where in the in-between segments things will hit you offscreen.

multiple times in the gameplay you are punished for going too fast. not stopped, punished. hit if not straight up killed. The point of the game is to build up speed, and if you do what it's designed to do in final boss fang as trip, you hit a one hit kill barrier and have to start all over.

Speaking of Trip, i hate to say it but after looking at her for very long her unmasked design is disappointing at best. She looks like a recolored modern Amy. And if that was the point like it looks like it is, it's a dumb idea. They should've focused on making her look like her own character and actually like a lizard. Other than the thing glued to her head she looks like a recolored amy you'd find on a forum in 2008 and I mean that in a poor way. She doesn't look like a lizard or even a sunglider. They gave her a hair accessory and an undercut and called it a day.

activly while playing as her i wanted the helmet back on. it's a much more fun/different design. everytime i looked down at her I just saw Amy. full stop.

don't even get me started on her dragon design. it just looks stupid. not only should they have leaned towards a more eastern oroborus dragon but god it just. looks dumb. not only that but that super transformation seems too overpowered for a character supposedly forgotten by the main cast until recently or just. some random girl.

At this time i have not reached the final boss, this is in the state trying to beat fang and once again dying to some bullshit on the first phase. Ive only ever reached phase 2 once and got hit by an intakill.

i don't care if it's "authentic"

the old games were also hard as balls for no reason. they were based on an arcade-style idea despite not designed for an arcade, where you want the character to die a bunch and go back to the beginning so they waste their quarters.

not only is this not an arcade game, but you already got my 60 dollars. The old games had many problems with how they played that I only survived via save-states.

this game consistently made me wish i pirated it. Specifically for the save state feature. with that feature I would've actually had fun. But I'm sent back to the beginning of a 10 minute long boss battle.

it's 2023, not 1991. why is your game like this. why is her design like this.

especially after following the bullshit that was the master king trial specifically. one guy on reddit sad fronteirs was easy and they decided to make all of their games need frame perfect runs to be beatable.

not only is this a disgrace to wanting games to be accessible to anyone, but holy shit I have a disability. my hypermobility makes my fingers hurt after all this. anyone with worse disabilities are fucked, and again no easy mode or save stating is offered.

i don't know if doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results is the definition of insanity. but being forced to do the same thing over and over again for different results sure makes me feel insane.

if you read this thinking of buying the game and didn't have spoilers tagged. if you do. pirate the game. you'll have a much better experience than I am paying 60 dollars.

sonic superstars overall was disappointing in everything but visuals. and that's coming from someone who goes out of my way to spread positivity about sonic projects because I actively see them. I don't here.

truly the best way to describe it is disappointed.

#sonic superstars #sonic superstars spoilers #sonic spoilers #trip the sungazer

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squimp · 2 months

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Watched dune 2021 finally. honestly im mad it took me so long to finally watch it and i wish i had seen it in theaters... as a long tjme dune enjoyer (read some of it + grew up watching david lynch dune) think it really lived up to the hype. i feel like what makes these new dune movies such a phenomenon compared to the piles of remake reboot sequel slop we mostly see nowadays is the same thing that made the lotr movies so singular, which is that you can really tell the people involved in production had a really deep passion and respect for the source material and wanted to do it justice

also the score and sound design was insanely beautiful + i love the ways they collected unique sounds for it by burying microphones in sand and stuff like that

main complaint: for a movie that prides itself on being visually stunning (which it is) the costumes seriously fell flat. like they were passable but really disappointing to me. the designs and ideas were good enough but the execution was sad and looked cheap for a movie production of this scale. i wish they had given more time and budget for it because the lack of detail on everything made me sad. especially given the legacy of jodorowskys dune like this is just one example but why did they make baron harkonnen completely dripless i hate it so much

#txt #im gonna see part 2 in theaters today 😈

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the-gayest-tree-you-ever-did-see · 1 month

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all my ttpd notes on each song before public opinion (overall opinion of the album at the end)

i didnt include tracks 1-6 bc ive posted about them already, but ill add them slowly by eod tomorrow most likely

fresh out the slammer

this is the track i was most excited for i think

oh title drop very early

fresh. out. the slammer. uhhh

i love the flow on all of the songs but i especially like this, its very fluid

FOR JUST ONE HOUR OF SUNSHINE!!!

in the shade of how he was feeling

the flow is very midnight rain i think

OOOH THE CHANGE AT 2:25 I LOVE THISSSSS

"im the girl of his american dreams" OMGGGG

i like the second half way better but the song is awesome

i think what im noticing about the album overall (so far) is it feels very empty production wise. its mostly her voice carrying it through but its hollow and i really think we need a more full production on this, or at least some parts of it. it feels uneven yk? or sort of unfinished, like she had the vocals and just slapped something behind it

florida!!!

VERY VERY EXCITED FOR THIS FLORENCE!!!!!!

and my friends all smell like weed or little babies.... ok.

okkkk less than a minute in and this is sooo anti-capitalist for a billionaire

FLORENCE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i was so scared she'd be swept aside

"all my girls got their lace and their crimes"

so many mentions of a cheating husband on this album

"is that a bad thing to say in a song?" I LOOOOOVE MENTIONS OF THE MEDIA IN THAT MEDIA

FLORIDAAAA!! IS ONE HELL OF A DRuug..........

you can kind of here the thinness (??) of taylor's voice next to florence, the depth is lacking -- not necessarily bad, just something you can hear more with this track

some parts of it ("little did you know...") sound sort of like everybody wants to rule the world, idk if thats just me

guilty as sin

love the production this is so niceee

am i allowed to cry!

"oh what a way to dieeeee"

MESSY TOP LIP KISS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

without ever touching his skin, how can i be guilty as sin............ is this about matty healy please

the quiet distorted "what?" in the bg is very bejeweled

my bedsheets are ablaze

the melody on this is lowkey kind of boring. theres points where i expect her to do something interesting with her voice and flick up or drop low or trill and it just doesnt happen. would be very cool if that was there

"long suffering propriety" that whole bridge is written well but sung so clunky? like it doesnt sound natural it sounds like syllable filler yk? and i know this bc i do it way too much KSJDCHIUHRFIUH

ending with am i allowed to cry, its very much an internal song. idk how to explain it but shes looking in, and when she says am i allowed to cry, shes looking up. <- what???

whos afraid of little old me?

ooooh it starts out so cunty

"my bare hands paved their paths"

you dont get to tell me about sad!

I LOVE THISSS its so mad woman its so rep coded

"i leap from the gallows and i levitate down your street" GREAT LYRIC HILARIOUS VISUAL ITS LIKE THAT HALLWAY MEME BUT WITH TAYLOR. hold on

okay

WHOS AFRAID OF LITTLE OLD ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! you should be <- ME TO MY MOM

production goes off cunty as fuck

"the scandal was contained" OMGG TELL ME TELL ME

you dont get to tell me you feel bad variant

BRIDGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i think this is my favorite track i love it

"the circus life made me mean" ooooh very very interesting. i will analyze this song more fully later but not on this post

"tell me everything is not about me, what if it is?" OKAYYYYY

the way she sings "you should be" reminds of something on folklore/evermore but i cant think of what

shes very cool on this song. the emotion actually comes through.

"you wouldnt last an hour in the asylum where they raised me." oh okay! so like. have we considered not saying that.

i think that line turned me off the whole song KJSDCIUERFHIUEFH LIKE???? HELLO???????

i just. hm. very disappointed. you have one billion dollars. your parents put down the deposit for your career. ok.

the way she sings "wretched" and "narcotics" is what i wanted for more of the album. ykwim.

i will admit her screaming the title is veeeery very nice

"i am what i am cause you trained me" okkkk. im sorry taylor my bad!

idk how i feel about this song anymore. should i just ignore the lyrics and listen lmaoo

i can fix him (no i really i can)

okay i was waiting on this song but with the context of the rest of the album. idk. we'll see

okay IMMEDIATE ick.......... "the smoke cloud billows out his mouth like a freight train through a small town" okay taylor i guess rhymezone was in for her. idkkkkk

okay next line came in actually i spoke too soon it serves !!

this is very cowboy like me inverse

ughhh title drop already. see i wanted it cunty!!! why title it that when its so nothing. this is SO NOTHING

is this about matty healy. girl hes a neonazi you cant fix him

BRIDGE?????? i love when she shows off her kinks

okay. yeah this song was very nothing.

loml

the piano is very gentle on this and muted. i like it

is this aaron dessner? hold on lemme check

yes it is!!!

"never before and never since" looooove <3 <3 <3

"still alive, killing time at the cemetery, never quite buried in your suit and tie" LOOOOOOVE <3 <3 <3

this is very her relationship with religion methinks....

"about a million times" ala illicit affairs "a million little times"

"when your impressionist paintings of heaven turned out to be fakes" i think this is my favorite lyricism out of the album, its very natural its very clear its very real. i really really like it

A CONMAN SELLS A FOOL A GET LOVE QUICK SCHEME. GAGGED

some of it is very grieving that she didnt last with her first love, that she still has to work for it. but its also still feeling like a metaphor for religious beliefs and god, that she cant fully believe and she wishes she had unwavering faith

MR STEAL YO GIRL????????????

"talking rings and talking cradles"

i wish i could unrecall how we almost had it all

"SOMETHING COUNTERFEIT'S DEAD" GLITCH I ALWAYS BELIEVED IN YOU (lie)

"ill never leave. never mind"

the way this extends is very phoebe bridgers and the way she enunciates "loss of my life" is very her as well

okay donesies. i liked this one a lot.

i can do it with a broken heart

i like the glimmery production

lyrics again are flopping a little :/

"im a real tough kid, i can handle my shit" 😸 okay

GOTTA FAKE IT TIL I MAKE IT TIL I DID !!!

the lyrics are so over and so back so much its killing me. i cringe so hard i cry and then i gag just as hard

lights camera bitch smile even when i wanna die......................

"ALL THE PIECES OF ME SHATTERED WHILE THE CROWD WAS SCREAMING MORE" im so. im sooo sos so so feeling aout this.

whos counting in the background idk how i feel about it

"im so depressed i act like its my birthday everyday" ughhhhh!!! cunty but she didnt sing it right yk. idk.

production slays

"im so obsessed with him but he avoids me like the plague" we're back again. i told yall its over and back and over and back SOOOOOO MUCH

okay i think i like it

I CRY A LOT BUT I AM SO PRODUCTIVE! SOOOOOOOOOOOO ME

i wanted the whole album to be like that verse

im a real tough kid again :/ shhhh

"in stilettos for miles" eras im so so sorry girl

IM SO DEPRESSED I ACT LIKE ITS MY BIRTHDAY EVERY DAY IM SO OBSESSED WITH HIM BUT HE AVOIDS ME LIKE THE PLAGUE I CRY A LOT BUT I AM SO PRODUCTIVE ITS AN ART YOU KNOW YOURE GOOD WHEN YOU CAN EVEN DO IT WITH A BROKEN HEART! ! !

when she does "you know youre good!" and the laughing and everything ohhhh my god. IM SO MISERABLE! AND NO ONE KNOWS! dont try and come for my job OKAYYYYYYY SHE SERVED ON THIS

okay i think i really like this song. i just need a couple days lol

the smallest man who ever lived

veryyyyy excited for this. i think. a little.

"who the fuck was that guy" OKAYY!!!!!!!!

theres no lyric i was to write here but its all very good btw

she sounds like my english teacher vocally and its killing me KSJDCIUERHFIUERH

"in public showed me off then sank in stoned oblivion"

i cant figure out what shes saying "once your queen had come, you treat her like an ulcer and"??? alseran?? i cant understand it skdjfhieurhiuerg

you didnt measure up in any measure of a man !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! taylor date girls <3

the production is building here i like it is she gonna belt/scream

YEAHHHH BELTING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"were you a sleeper cell spy in 50 years will all this be declassified and youll confess why you did it and ill say good riddance cause it wasnt sex [something something] and it wasnt forbidden" I REAAAAALLY LIKE THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i like when she makes up situations and puts herself in them

YOU CRASHED MY PARTY AND YOUR RENTAL CAR

you kicked out the stage lights but youre still performing.

"you are what you did" versus innocent's "who you are is not where you've been"

i like this track

the alchemy

I WAS SUPER EXCITED FOR THIS BUT NOW IDK HOW TO FEEL!!! idk im just jumping in

oh r&b production?? interesting....

ooh whats the rumbling thing i like that

shes returning to something but what...

TOUCHDOWN IS THIS KILLATRAV !!!!!!!!!!!!!! KILLATRAV KILLATRAV !!!!!!!!!!!

oh title drop but i wasnt listening KJSHCIUHEGFH

reference to maathp

is this returning to american boys KJIUFHEORUFHOERF???

oh this is sooooo referencing maathp

okay but it sounds like this person and her were already together and now theyre back "his heart....is still reserved for me" or maybe thats just trav holding on the friendship bracelet

i hate to say this but "wheres the trophy? he just comes running over to me" is very call it what you want + sweet nothing and another song i cant remember right now but yall know...... im sorry

im stupid as hell i cant hear what the line is where she says the alchemy

"he jokes that its heroine but this time with an e" THIS TIME??????

very much like this song. def not what i was expecting and im disappointed in that regard but its still a fun song

clara bow

nervous for this song. i like when she references people and places but theres a way to do it so i get scared every time

oooh ear ringing noise is very fun. i hope its not the whole time though

immediate title drop

oh so its not her? shes talking to someone else i think

oh this is in her past i think

lyrics are flopping.

"breath of fresh air through the smoke rings" like i can fix him (no really i can"

ohhh tambourine WAS stevie nicks reference

SORRY i dont like how she says eclipse lmaoo

i kind of dont vibe with all the small town references its as if she needs to remind us where she came from to be considered good like look how much i did when i came from nothing (even though she didnt)

YOU LOOK LIKE TAYLOR SWIFT IN THIS LIGHT !!!!

youve got edge, she never did girlllllllllll

so does she consider herself the "replacement" for clara bow?

song is okay i think it might grow on me. i think the biggest disappointment on this album is how predictable it all feels sonically.

the black dog

bonus track!! this is the only one i have so i might add the others later but tbh i might wait bc i dont know how much i. care.

muted pianooooo i love muted piano<333

YOU SHARED YOUR LOCATION AND FORGOT TO TURN IT OFF

oh the black dog is a bar. im kind of. okay. okay

"shes too young to know this song" is a nice line but its clunky how its sung

old habits die screaming!

girl your longing does NAWT stay unspoken

folklore when she used "big" words it felt natural (for the most part). here it feels performative? like it doesnt FIT naturally

"was it hazing for a cruel fraternity i pledged" idk how to feel about this!

lots and lots of smoke references!

"six weeks of breathing clean air" -> CLEAN!!!!!!!!!!

two times she says she wants to burn her clothes on this album

i like the production im literally kind of ignoring the lyrics

omg never mind "tail between your legs youre leaving"

personal ick but i hate when songs cut off in a word. she goes "old habits die screeeeeam-" and nothing. JUST SAY THE -ING

okay cool. mid song but i hope the swifties who thought it was about depression and got the variant are feeling okay<33

overall: idk about this album. i went in really excited and so maybe thats why i feel so let down... but i feel so let down. this isnt what was marketed, this isnt anything even real for a lot of it. she's all over the place and i dont think its a tight and solid album -- although monetarily it will obviously look like one. there are moments where we get something very her and very real and i think those moments save the album. the production is also a little all over the place, and so very nothing. im not asking her to do anything fresh or new but why would you market it as if it was and not deliver?

i liked florida!!!, loml, and i can do it with a broken heart -- i think clara bow, the alchemy, and some others (you can tell with my notes LOL) will grow on me. and the tortured poets department and my boy only breaks his favorite toys were good songs, but i think i need a few days to actually acknowledge them as such.

also i think lyrically shes done a few very interesting things. it almost feels like debut with how specific it is and the name dropping and everything -- however it is new/rusty for her so that also kind of hurts her overall. i think maybe this is like good practice for a more evolved narrative lyricism in the future, bc her past mo of hazy visuals and thinly connected moments to string into a narrative just doesnt work anymore.

i will say. she did make me experience all 5 stages of grief plus some fun extras. maybe not in the way she wanted, but i did anyway ! its a fun album and i def think ill like it more as time goes on, but this is my opinion without outside influence and within the first day of listening -- i want to see how that changes! im also holding off on album rankings until a week or two passes

#ALRIGHT WHO WANT ME !#a lot of times my initial reaction to a song is very different from how i feel about it as i keep listening so trust NOTHING i say kdsjfhie #(regarding rankings and favorites not the notes)#and with taylor you have to let the songs grow on you #taylor swift #the tortured poets department #ttpd #the tree speaks

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wrdn-tabris · 9 months

Text

a little life update :-)

(pls help i need advice)

i have this friend. two friends actually. i went to visit them recently (june)

friend 1, lets call her cat had asked friend two, lets call her bee, to move down with her. bee agreed. issues immediately started. bee was off her meds and didnt want to get back on them, and started picking fights with cat, treating her badly and etc bc thats what bee used to do when she still lived with her mom. pick fights when her mood dropped and get into screaming matches (tho its not like her mom didnt also pick fights with her)

cats telling me abt this at this time and i feel bad bc i feel like i wasnt being a good friend mostly bc i didnt have the energy to hear abt how terrible it was going for her. i was going thru a lot when it started which isnt her fault or my fault, but i feel bad for not being more supportive. so cat stopped telling me abt it, bc i didnt know what to do or how to fix things. i thought stuff resolved itself but i went and visited and it hasnt. really.

so i arrive. bee doesnt come with cat to pick me up, which, ok disappointing but i understood she was tired. she didnt come to eat with us either. which also sad

next day cat asks for some rent money to get herself lunch, bc she forgot to make smth to eat before leaving and cat couldnt and wouldnt give their rent money so she could get lunch. so she asked us to bring her lunch from mcdonalds if she ordered somthing bc she had points on the app, and we had to decide tht if we are driving tht far out to where she works we might as well do something over there. cat asks if we should invite her partner with us and i agreed bc i wanted to meet him. we go to pick up her lunch, she asks me to buy her something rather than ordering smth off the app, which, feels :/ to assume ill just buy it for her. i would have if she asked but she just sent me her order. mybe an asshole move of my to say 'uhhh sure if ur able to order it off the app???'

get the food, fight thru traffic to get to her, have to fight thru parking traffic to get out of where she works. we end up visiting this old military fort and hang out for a few hours and when we come back we think bee is asleep. its like. 7:30? 8:00?

so i try to inflate the blow up bed i got for them to use for when they have other guests sleep over and me and cats bf wake her up while im trying to figure out how to work it so she comes out and snaps at us. i apologize for being loud, promise to be quieter but im inflating the air mattress so i might be loud for a few minutes. the ENTIRE time im inflating it shes standing there arms crossed glaring at us and clearing her throat the entire time. and maybe its just me but??? i find that to be a little fucking rude tbqh. me and the bf are guests and its making me feel unwelcome and regretting the money i spent to come visit her. anyways cat comes out from the bathroom bc bee is still there clearing her throat with her arms crossed even after i finished fixing up the air mattress, and its quiet as hell bc me and bf are both uncomfy. cat gets mad and upset bc were guests in their home and she shouldnt be treating her like tht. shes upset we woke her up but surprise surprise shes even MORE upset i met cats partner before hers bc she wanted it to all be 'together' even tho i agreed to meet bf bc i did! want to meet him! and that we went to the fort without her.

anyways.

i apologize to her abt that bc i wanted to meet him but shes like 'no cat knew i wanted to do this thing' which fair.

the rest of the week goes ok. i get to meet her partner and theyre so nice and funny and i was super excited to meet them. we hit off great. we get lunch with one of cats friends, bee remarks abt 'oh i used to get so upset abt ppl being happier than me, enjoyed making ppl unhappy and would go out of my way to do so, bc i didnt like that they were happy and i wasnt' i buy bee a present for her birthday and u kno week ends i go home, and turns out bees partner comes out to her abt some things and bee freaks out, gets super upset and reacts really poorly. starts crying and going off abt being betrayed and etc.

turns out partner breaks up with her the next day bc they were uncomfortable with the reaction and then she starts crying and going off again abt feeling betrayed and upset and wanting to kill herself and tht they told her they loved her and would never leave and etc etc etc amongst other 'its not faiiiir' reactions. i still hold the opinion she was upset bc they broke up with her first.

cat calls her out for her behavior and that shes saying some very inappropriate things and tht ex isnt an awful person. bee ends up demanding all the gifts she gave ex back and wanted to know what ex would be doing with special gifts they got her before they both broke up.

i honestly end up quite. disgusted? with her behavior bc any time she broke up with someone while she lived separately from cat, shed ghost us and wed only get her side of the story. cat all but ends up moving in with her partner bc bee refuses to clean up after herself and keeps making a mess of things and its just a bad living situation.

cat tells bee tht shes not thinking of renewing their lease at the end of the year bc she cant handle living like this and bee lashes out. ends up making a mess of their kitchen and breaking some of cats things.

she also uses special non stick stuff of cats and uses metal on it (which ur not supposed to do) and keeps using cats own dishes and dishes she got from her grandma and doesnt clean them or anything.

my thing is. i dont know what to do. i kinda wanna stop our friendship bc im upset at how shes treating our other mutual friend. but i dont know if i should talk to her bc ive asked cat if i should try and talk to her to get her to see tht shes not being a good friend and cats told me not to, mostly bc she refuses to see shes wrong. im leaning towards wanting to follow her advice bc she has been living with bee but also it feels so scummy not to say anything esp when i know shes going to be going thru a difficult time in the next few months. however if i talk to her, i dont want to cause her to lash out at bee or have any of her things that are still at their apartment broken bc bees already proven to lash out and break other peoples things when shes upset at them, and i dont want to make it any worse for her.

bee would tend to ghost us when she was stll living with her mother, so much so tht we wouldnt hear from her for weeks or months, esp when she was feeling bad. i would try to reach out to her just to make sure she was fucking alive lmao. im worried if i were to reach out and ask abt all this and end with our friendship splitting off, shed do something drastic like hurt herself. i want to reach out and try to salvage what i feel is a dissolving friendship but i also dont want to be friends with this type of person unless shes worked on herself. i still love and care for her but like i know who i would stick by if i had to which... feels bad to say and sucks but th fact is i am closer with cat, mostly bc when bee would ghost us me and cat would still talk and we have more in common.

i want to talk and ask her why she would do and say these things and treat ppl she loves like this but ive been told not to but it would feel wrong not to at least. reach out. i dont know what to do.

AITA?

#cara speaks #the aita at the end is a joke but genuinely #i dont know what to do here #pls dont feel. obligated to respond to this or give advice i just do not know what to do

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mina-saiyat · 1 year

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Hi, hope you have a great day

Thanks for your perspective, i guess you have a point about taiwan concert. I thought that its been very long ago since the political issues brought up in the past (you know what it is). Just i didnt thought is it could be escalated and prolonged up to this day. Apologies for not taking this lightly with my rant.

As for part3 possibilities, i doubt it very much, so im not gonna give myself hopes anymore, im just done. Just disappointed from part 2 is like only that much of cities and even the venue is just 20k++ ish except the PH one lol. I guess its all because of them quoting 'the biggest tour' in their yearly report that got me. In the end, its jype we're talking about 😗😗

Ok it ends here, thanks for your pov, dont wanna turn this into other bird platform. This platform is for the stories and plots mostly smut (fanfic i mean)

Sry its a long post hahahaha

Nice to meet you btw

-itsanon-

It's not the banning from the authorities. If you recall why Twice has never entered China Market, even if they have a Chinese member, JYP has publicly announced that Twice would not participate in any event in China starting from 2016.

That's why Twice hasn't participated in any event in the area, except for Mama and a special episode of Music Bank in Hong Kong.

I think most people are disappointed as the scale of part 2 and part 1 are too different, so do I, just 3 stops and each with a day only. It really sucks.

I have heard that Nayeon said they would hope to have an encore concert in the year end in the talk session of Seoul stop (I don'tknow Korean, not sure is it really what she said) I hope it would be real so I can go again.

Life goes on, of course going their concert would be a really good experience, but please don't be too sad or mad, at last our real life is more important.

Cheers mate, have a good day.

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mxtchups · 2 years

Note

hihi! could I request a romantic matchup for 'The Arcana' (′▽`〃)?

i use they\them pronouns and I'm pan^^

my mbti is intp. I'm a very shy and reserved person in public, I try not to cause too much attention but also express myself openly. I suffer from anxiety ( I don't take meds or anything so I'm usually on edge) and overthink about people/other things. If you get to know me, im a huge extrovert and cheerful person. I love making jokes and laughing <3 I'm airheaded and clumsy, I hit my head or trip on air too much smh. I'm a very random person too, more eccentric for sure. I do the most offwall things because I'm bored ( like jumping off things or asking off-putting questions). I love talking! About anything I'm hyperfixated on atm ( as in old interests or new ones!) and I can go on for hours tbh. I'm pretty childish, but mature and mother like when I need to be. I love physical affection (even tho I say I hate it) anything like hugs is nice for me! I'm a caring person and mostly a listener. Very sassy (which people say it's "cute" from me) and sarcastic, with a whole lot of blunt. I'm a flirt too, but anything flirty from someone else gets me shy (like Julian lol). I get very bad mood swings and it is causing trouble for me to make friends or keep them, since I'll just isolate myself from them- I also have insecurities regarding my looks (particularly my body) so I get v sour when I think about that. Alot of the times you can tell when I'm in a mood bc I get quiet. ANyway I'm a lazy, procrastinater and plainn lmao.

my interests r playing the piano, reading/watching anime, romance novels (love triangles are my life), alternative/gothic fashion and music, hard rock and metal, stuffed animals and playing videogames!!

if it helps I pursued Julian to the very end ╰_╯!!!

hello! first of all, thank you sm for requesting, you are the first person that asked for a matchup so I hope I do it well. I don't want to leave you disappointed.

soo I ship you with Muriel!

Firstly, if anyone would understand your need to withdraw and not always be surrounded by people, it's Muriel. If you want to spend time alone with him, not doing anything in particular, he's there for it. If you don't even want to be with him and want to be left alone, he can understand that too. He won't get mad, offended, or sad, he'll just know you need some you time.

But in case you completely cut contact with him suddenly and isolate yourself, at first, even though he'd be worried, he'd think that maybe it's best he leaves you alone, and let you come back when you want to. But I feel like his worry would get the best of him and he would definitely check up on you. If you let him in, perfect, he now knows what he needs to do. If you don't he would truly not mind you coming back after a few days, weeks, or months and continuing where you left off.

With Muriel, there would be fewer reasons for you to overthink and panic about his true intentions or thoughts as it would be clear he sees you differently from other people. Although his ways of showing love wouldn't be the most open ways, definitely not always conventional they would be clear. If he loves you, you know it.

Also, I feel like both of you wouldn't like public displays of affection, but when you are inside, alone, you would get as much physical contact as needed. Both you nor Muriel aren't someone that would outwardly ask for cuddles, even though both would want it, so at least at the beginning of the relationship, you would be the one to initiate it.

Neither of you would get into a relationship without knowing someone well beforehand, so your extroverted side would definitely come out by the time you were dating, and he'd love and understand that one just as much as the introverted one.

The first time in what felt like a century since he laughed, it was on one of your jokes. Since then you probably would try to make him laugh as much as possible.

It's good that he has good reflexes as you said you were clumsy, but don't worry he's there to catch you every time you trip on air, or put a hand between your head and a cupboard, or guide you through a big crowd.

Your off-putting questions would at first surprise him and he'd never know how to answer them, but I feel like you'd always find a way to get the answer out of him. By the time you are deeper in the relationship he'd get used to them, and usually was able to see them coming and is more open with his answers. Though sometimes you'll still see him blush and take some time before spitting it out.

He'd also like the fact that you can talk for hours, and for all those hours he'd listen to you intently. Sometimes he's not sure if he's interesting enough for you as you have so many things you like and are good at whereas his past stopped him from that. But there you come in with your long talks teaching him about this and that and introducing him to so many wonders of the world. That would definitely be one of his favorite things about you.

Regarding your looks, he'd just never really think about it until you mention you are insecure about them. From the moment he met you he saw you as stunning and beautiful, so hearing that you don't like it came as quite a shock for him. He'll probably at first express his love for your body physically but he knows words are needed too, and he'd put in all the effort to find the right ones to explain to you just how gorgeous you are in his eyes. He knows that won't make your self-image go away so he'll make sure to compliment you more in the future, till you start believing him. You are the one that made him see good in himself so he'll make sure to at least return the favor.

He'd love you being blunt. He's not always good at interpreting the hidden meaning behind someone's words so just saying it how it is would make it a whole lot easier for him. And if you always say it like that it would also make it easier for him to express himself.

He is not good at flirting, and he'd get super shy every time you openly flirted with him. Before you dated he never knew if you were joking or if you'd actually want to have something with him, but either way it'd leave him a blushing mess.

And AAA I can already see you playing the piano and him sitting on the stool next to you, slightly leaning towards you, scared to do it fully so he doesn't interrupt you in any way and end the alluring music. He'd love it every time you play and once he's relaxed he'd often ask you to do it for him.

OMG, I CAN ALSO SEE YOU READING TO HIM. Imagine laying in bed, cuddled up, you with a book in one hand, the other hand in his hair, gently playing with it as you read to him. He's scared to fall asleep, so you don't think you bored him but once you tell him it's okay it'll be the best sleep he's ever had.

And as he knows you are reading romance books he might think you have big expectations as to what couples are supposed to do, or are simply more knowledgeable than him in this entire matter, so he'll consult one of your books and try doing something from it to win you over.

He'd adore the way you dress, and do your hair and make-up. And once he trusts you enough, which is pretty fast compared to how he feels about other people, he'd let you do his hair sometimes or put some makeup on him.

He'd make you stuffed animals and then like leave them somewhere in your house for you to find or like on your porch because he'd be too shy to give them to you in person, but you'd know whose it's from.

In any way, you'd make each other feel comfortable, safe, and cared for. The roles of the caregiver and care receiver would be equally divided and would switch.

Regarding you and Julian I can also see that, but to me personally, I see it more as friendship.

I can see you two dressing in romantic gothic fashion together. Being dramatic together. Having all sorts of fun. He'd definitely like listening to your stories and having a myriad of his own to share. Imagine introducing him to metal! That'd be super fun. He'd still flirt with you, but most of the time it would be jokingly, he'd just like to see you get all shy.

I really hope this is okay, once again thank you for requesting!

#matchups #muriel #muriel x you #julian #the arcana #arcana matchup #julian devorak

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munsons-maiden · 2 years

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hi, i really need to vent rn and you are literally a safe space for anything eddie/joseph related and i just feel like i have to talk about it.

my heart is broken and ive cried my eyes out for a while now because joe wont be at the german comic con due to issues with his passport. ive spent so much money on tickets and the whole trip to see him. like, all i wanted was one of those hugs he gives everyone and i wrote him a letter and now its all for nothing.

i am so sad and frustrated now because i wont get my money back and i had to fight the entire week to get tickets for him. i almost got scammed two times and now this. no hug, no smile, no nothing :(

im still going and i at least got a ticket for grace, so as long as she wont cancel too, its at least something. but its still so disappointing and i feel so devastated. knowing that id meet him gave me so much motivation to do something and now its all gone again.

im still thinking if its a dck move to ask grace if she will take my letter and maybe gets it to joe somehow. the letter really means so much to me and idk if ill ever get the chance to give it to him now. but im scared that grace might think im only using her, if she even agrees. and if she did agree, maybe the letter would get lost somewhere and any chance of getting it to him is gone...

i really dont know what to do now and im trying to see the positive aspects but its so hard, considering everything i invested and all the hopes i had :(

sorry to dump this on you, i just needed to tell someone

same anon with the german comic con topic here... again i just feel like my last whining session sounded like im mostly frustrated that i spent so much money. and while that is true, i spent it gladly to meet joseph. just wanted to clarify.

the money issue isnt my biggest problem, its just the only thing i can actually be mad about rn, bcs joe has a valid reason to cancel. even if the passport thing is not the whole truth and maybe he ditched because the london cc wasnt going too great (some ppl speculate that he didn't wanna do another comic con so soon after) its his right to do so and i cant be mad at him.

its just so disappointing because i wanted to talk to him and see him interact with fans and ask him stuff. and now the opportunity is gone and it was pure luck that i even had this one chance. its just... i miss him, without ever meeting him? does that make sense?

i feel like his presence must be so nice to be around and i was so ecstatic when i finally got the tickets. and now i think i ruined it for myself because every time i overthink something, i make up 567 scenarios in my head, what could happen, what i could say and so on... and whenever i do this, i jinx it. and the little ppl controling my life, reading my thoughts, built me a path i didnt calculate.

its the same thing that happened this time, its the same thing that happens all the time with whatever situation i am confronted with.

to end this second rant on a note that is actually related to you and not just a random anon escalating in your asks... i could really use some new eddie content right now and i am over the moon, that worlds apart chapter 7 will be out soon and i can drown myself in my sorrow and the new chap ):)

Hi sweetheart! First of all, no worries, my inbox is always open🖤

I'm very sorry this happened, and I totally understand the sadness and frustration about the situation, it's absolutely valid. There's sadly not much of a positive aspect to this except for the fact that they're already talking to Joe about coming to another Comic Con in Germany in October - maybe it's worth a shot to try and get tickets for this one?

As for the letter; it depends entirely on what feels safe/comfortable for you. If you plan to get tickets for the October Con, you could keep the letter to give it to him yourself, since it seems very personal? In the end, you're the only person who can make a decision about that; you could take the letter with you and decide while you're there?

I hope you'll feel better soon, and should you decide to try for tickets for October, my fingers are crossed! 🖤

(And I hope Worlds Apart can contribute a little to comfort you🖤)

#kiki answers

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zellen420 · 11 months

Text

Warning ⚠️ meaningless rantings

Ok so. Abit about me, I have had clinical depression since I was 9 years old. It doesn't exactly go away or get better. Cupple that with ADHD the inattentive kind, and dyslexia it's hard to feel that people understand your train of thought.

So I've seen councilors, psychologists and psychiatrists. I've even been on antidepressants. Wall I feel that those treatments are grate. I've had enough poor experiences that I'm kinda at a point where dealing with a professional would course me just as much issues on its own that it doesn't feel exactly worth it. Especially as history has dictated that the moment I felt stable and confident enough in my care to stop hiding and open up. I would be met with some circumstance where my providers would ternate treatment. Or it would become immediately clear that this person is not a safe provider.

So hear is my problem. I have a hard time being motivated to do much more than exist. I feel it has hurt my relationships and stunted my life in general.

You see I know there are things, techniques and "strategies" that work for me and I should be using .. I'm not. Becouse making sure I take my medication is such a challenge that there are many days where that is realistically all I've accomplished.

I hate this

I hate that I can't seem to sleep without headphones becouse if I let myself lission to the silence of my own breath my inner voice rears its head like a ugly hydra prepared to grow louder on more violent with every attempt to quiet it's yamerings of every bad thing, sad moment, disappointment, let down, broken promise , short coming, or interaction that I've ever had. So without a numbing I don't sleep

If I don't have other people to feed I can go all day without thinking of food. And frankly I tend to eat mostly out of routine to avoid my hand shaking and my cat getting mad at me. But with that I do tend to have safe foods that I eat over and over that are frankly tarrable for my system.

I want to be more active.

I think if I move more it may help

My back if fucked

But I'm afraid to walk in my nabourhood. Partly becouse I'm embarrassed to be seen. Mostly becouse of dog owners who don't understand that some people don't want to see your dog. Yes even if you think it's well trained and cute. Your dog isn't something I want to interact with, especially when it is off leash running towards me on a trail marked "on leash only"

But yah know. That makes me the asshole right. Because your choice to brake the rules and let your animal run up to me, where I should be able to safely expect that these owners have control and care for there animals, made me feel unsafe and triggered a anxious shutdown.

I hate leving me house.

I have nowhere to go.

I have no friends that I see regularly.

I can't afford to join a class .

I'm afraid to meet people. Becouse that tends to go badly.

Part of me just wants to go to sleep

But I can't

The thoughts keep me up

They tend me be my mother,

But it's not just her voice

"welp.. you have a multifaceted personality."

"if you don't stop eating you'll always have a rotund figure"

"just try harder"

"You have a unconventional face"

"you have no idea how hard it is to find a dark haired doll with blue eyes. Blue eyes just seem to come with blonds"

"if your eyes are blue then so is a elephants ass"

"dont touch her it's probably contagious"

"why would I be friends with a girl that looks and sounds like a boy"

"you only have long hair so people think your a girl"

"we all know your not a real girl"

"no feaks or foureyes"

"what's the skirt for? Hiding your fat cock?"

"Holy shit it has tits!"

"I'm so glad Im not ******"

"why are you with her?"

"yah know now that I've actually talked to you. Your really easy to get along with."

"you know I can't let anyone know we hangout"

"why should I ? My partner Is more important than you (ther child)!"

"smile"

"never mind. Umm don't smile"

"come take the photo for us. Thank-you !Perfect then everyone will be in it"

"I thought he only had a step daughter"

"your the first born?!"

"I didn't know _____ had a older sister. They never mentioned you"

" youed better be good at something"

"your brother will naturally be more successful than you"

"meeting/getting to know you had been.... 'interesting'"

"fat girls need to give good head. Otherwise who would date them?"

"I figure my face is only a few centimeters above my titts. I'm sure if I can get the focus up from there long enough they won't see my belly"

"if all your friends are hot, and your not conventionally attractive, well we all know what that means.. right"

"she's grate to have around the creeps run when they see her with us"

"why would anyone give a sit about your birthday?"

"you should totally sell this online! I bet If youed try it would work !"

"just do it"

"oooohh your _____s kid?. Damn"

"I promise"

"ignorance is bliss"

"if only we had met another time"

"you only have titts becouse your fat"

" we thought you where ace."

"your interests are.... Unique"

This is the lullaby my brain sings to me each night . I just want to not hate myself thank-you

Like youed think I would have fetishised this by now.

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kinqsteve · 2 years

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ok ok so i really feel like everyone's characters got fucked up by season four. like it was so out of character for everyone in general and for the most part.

yes, parts of it were good. but most of the good parts were just like relatively good compared to everything bad going on and/or compared to all of the theories we were anticipating be true.

i've seen people say most fan theories were better than what happened and .. yeah. so here are my thoughts. this will have spoilers.

i think steve should've died instead of eddie. it would've sucked and hurt, but isn't that the point? like, if they're trying to really prove this time that things are serious and they can't make it out alive all the time and all that jazz, then touch. the main. cast. why steve? uhh free joe keery ( /hj ) but also, it would've been good to solidify him as a hero and not make his whole character about loving nancy, but about loving his friends. plus, then eddie would serve as a "replacement" of sorts .. help "parent" the kiddos, ya know?

i think it's an interesting and probably unintentional parallel to have nancy end up with jonathan at the end of the season. let's go back, let's look at this. okay so season 1 .... nancy is with steve, fights monsters with jonathan, gets back with steve. season 2.. breaks up with steve, gets with jonathan. season 3, still with him. season 4 ... with jonathan, fights with steve ( !!! ) , gets back with jonathan ( !!!!! ). see, now, i'm not a stancy by any means, really. but, if im season 5 she gets with him, i could see this parallel playing out, and in that regard, i'd be all for it. but the way they went about it and wrote it, ruining all 3 of their characters, really, i'm like kinda against it?

max's ending in the season was kinda strange. i don't know how to feel about it. they could've saved her more or they could've killed her off, but this halfway thing seems almost lazy, i'm just holding out hope they remedy it in a great way.

let will say he's gay. i'm glad they brought back good big brother jonathan, though. but barely.

i have a lot of thoughts on mike, too. but i feel like they've all mostly been said and have been said better than i could say them. but the point of his life starting the day will went missing... bad writing. i'm just hoping the duffers didn't think that one through. romantic and cheesy monologue, badly written by mistake and neglect for his dynamic with will. it's like fine but tacky writing like objectively. so i think they're just bad, lazy writers and forgot to factor in actual character development. or i could get into the subconscious of mike and call it genius, but i guess i'm too lazy, too.

oh, and jason? that was like, lazy. kind of laughable. i'm glad he's gone but after that really long and unnecessary fight? could've had a better ending, in my opinion. and again, that fight and having the sinclair be victims of fights like that was just soo uncomfortable and just doesn't sit right with me.

i have a lot more to say, i'm sure, but for now, i'm tired.

i just feel like a lot of the writing this season, especially the ending was just kind of lazy. i feel very like disappointed. not even mad or sad, just like empty. underwhelmed, maybe.

i feel the same way about this season as i do avengers endgame and infinity war. i hate those movies. i hate this season. but, i liked them. those movies and this season had a lot of really, really good bits. but the horrible, sad bits just make me feel such a strange, unique, odd and empty feeling that it's hard for me to want to watch them. lots of funny, little moments of dialogue and characters being seemingly happy or even just finding joy in the sadness. those little parts are done really well. but the send offs both pieces gave certain characters are just .... i don't know, man. i just feel bored and weird. idk.

#st4 spoilers #stranger things s4 #ok to rb #in fact pls do and come talk to me abt the season !!#i jsut feel so ... like .. bleh .. h know?#u*

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