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areislol · 1 year

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he looks just like a dream..

neteyam, lo’ak, tsu’tey x human! reader

ft— neteyam, lo’ak, tsu’tey warnings— tsu’tey is still alive. them being (maybe) OOC, (not a warning but it contains playing with tails, touching their ears and marks, admiring them.) reader’s height is 5′ foot and taller, established relationship!! whole lot of fluff. the glowing leaves/plants are still alive. a/n— first avatar post soooo... i need me some tall, blue alien catboy in my life ykwim? also no recommended songs for this :( !!! a new format for the avatar series/hcs so yea. hope you enjoy! synopsis— bored, you want to see your lover, so with the help of a little girl you find them, and they let you do whatever you want to them.

today was just like the other days since you’ve arrived at Pandora, staying at a unit where grace and norm used to be at then moving to the metkayina clan. you’d go out with your mask on just to see the kids and of course, them.

but today it felt, boring. like the other half of you was missing, even with all the children around you couldn’t help but feel half empty.

well, that was because they weren’t there with you in the morning AND afternoon.

they had gone out hunting, leaving you alone with the others.

you were pouting there and then, sometimes zoning out, thinking about them.

then, while you were zoning out a little girl came up to you, alwey. that was her name

“y/n? are you okay?” alwey spoke, putting her hand on your thigh, giving you a look of concern.

“hm? oh! yes, yes im fine. don’t worry about me alwey. shouldn’t you be with the others?” you answer while giving her a small smile.

alwey stares at you, she shyly looks away before looking at you again, “i.. i wanted to see you..” alwey muttered.

you smile softly at her before lifting her up and setting her on your leg

“is that so?” you say while grinning before ticking her, a fit of squeals and giggles break out of her mouth.

you puts her hand on your arm which prompts you to stop, her laughter dies down.

“y/n.. i wanted to say, when i saw you, you looked sad. i called your name two times and you weren’t responding to me! what’s wrong?” alwey mentioned.

you stare at alwey for a good few seconds before sighing in defeat, “i really can’t keep secrets with you can i?”

you tell alwey about how you feel lonely, you feel like you’re selfish, wanting to see them everyday, every hour, minute and second.

alwey listens to you ranting, when you stop, she speaks.

“you’re not selfish y/n!! i like someone and i want to see them all the time but my dad doesn’t want me too.. wait.. you said he went to go hunting?”

you nod, her eyes light up and a grin appears on her lips, “my big bro went hunting too!! maybe he’s with them? they went... i think that way!”, alwey points to your left.

you sit up, but not before setting down alwey, you hug her tightly and give her a kiss on her temple, “oh thank you alwey! i owe you.” you say before running off to the direction alwey pointed to.

you finally reached the area where you see him and his friends/hunting partners talking

you wait until he is sort of alone and go up to him.

tapping him on his shoulder, he turns around, surprised to see you.

neteyam x human! reader

“Y/n? what are you doing here?” neteyam mutters before ushering you more into the forest, looking right and left to make sure nobody saw you. You give him a smile in return, “guys! im going to go uh, go somewhere okay?” neteyam shouts, when he hears a confirmative he turns you around and making you walk to a place further from where you two are, him following right behind you. After walking for a bit, neteyam puts his hand on your shoulder, “y/n? you still haven’t answered my question you know.” you turn around and look up to face neteyam, he sighs. “nothing bad happened right? everyone’s fine?” he questions, looking you up and down to make sure that you weren’t injured or anything. “I’m fine neteyam, just wanted to see you is all.” you reply, giving him a big smile before hugging him. god you’re so adorable! you’re killing him you know? he looks down at you, his arms are awkwardly right beside where your chest is. his arms are slightly splayed out, but upon you hugging him more tightly he wraps his arms around your shoulders. You two have hugged many times but neteyam is still always so nervous, shy and awkward when it comes to physical touch. But he doesn’t mind giving. Neteyam could feel you smiling once he hugged you back, “so you came out here, all on your own, just to hug me?” he asks, a grin appearing on his face. You tilt your head up a little bit to face neteyam before nodding, “think we could maybe rest somewhere.. where there’s no one? only us?” you ask, neteyam cocks his head to the side, “you’ve been out for hours today, i know this might sound selfish but i want to hang out with you everyday. i want to see your face, to hug you, to play with you,” you pause for a second but resume once he gives you a nod. “And today i.. well, like i said, you’ve been gone for too long!!” you blurt out, placing your head on his abdomen as let out a sigh, this was embarrassing. A few hard second passes by, suddenly you hear neteyam chuckling. You look up and see him laughing, he squeezes you even more tightly. You pout, “What’s so funny?” you ask, still staring at neteyam, waiting for an answer. Neteyam was still laughing, but once he sees you staring right at him, he immediately stops laughing, “okay okay! listen, we can go to a place with nobody..”, satisfied with your response, you let go of his body. “But why?” neteyam questions, you shrug your shoulders—”why not?” you answer, he rolls his eyes playfully and out of nowhere he picks you up quickly bridal style and starts to run, you shriek and demanded to why he picked you up out of nowhere. “You wanted to go somewhere with nobody right? im bringing you to that place!” neteyam answers, you see him grinning, you then turn your attention to trying not to fall, your arms were around his neck and his hands were on your back and legs, you screamed that if he dropped you he was going to “pay!!”, as if neteyam would ever let you fall. Only an idiot would let someone like you fall. After a few minutes neteyam stops, you’re aware he has stopped but you don’t let go. Not yet anyways. “You can let go of me now, you know that right?” and with that you’re left flustered and let go of neteyam, he slowly and carefully helps you by lowering you down, his hands still on your back. Once you got down you took in your view, bright fluorescent colors on the leaves and ground. Each step you took, it looked like stepping into the ocean, ripples would appear. You’ve seen them before, but you can help but gasp in amazement and awe at your sight, You also noticed that it was getting dark, no wonder why the fluorescent lights on the leaves were illuminating and glowing brightly. You turned around and see neteyam just standing there, admiring you, when you noticed that he was just there, standing, looking at you, you gave him a shy smile and turned back, touching the leaves, it lit up, you started to slap all of the leaves (just like what jake did) and giggled. It was one of those things that even though you’ve experienced it before, felt it or had it, you would never get enough of it. Neteyam still stood there, watching your every move, how the lights shined just as bright as the leaves, you looked gorgeous. beautiful, ethereal. You still wanted to look at the lights more but you forgot that a special someone was also with you, you turn around but suddenly your head bumps something, like a wall. It was neteyam. He was standing right behind you, you almost fell from the hit but neteyam was quick to catch you. You rubbed your head, groaning in pain. “Are you okay y/n? Oh im so sorry!” he cried out, putting his hand over yours which was on your forehead, you give him a small smile and mutter a “i’m okay”, his eyebrows were furrowed, he looked tense. You reassured him that you were okay but insisted that you weren’t and how your forehead was quite red, redder than usual. he sits down and sets you down on his lap, you’re facing towards him, occasionally he stares at your forehead, making sure that it’s not swelling or anything, and to say the least... he felt guilty. I mean, his job is to protect you and make sure you’re not harmed! even if it’s just a scratch. And no matter how many times you reassure him, he’s always insisting that he go hunt something for you or do something for you. And as always, he’s doing it right now. “Y/n, im really sorry, i’ll be more careful next time and i won’t stand right behind you.” neteyam mumbles, “for the last time neteyam, im fine! it doesn’t hurt anymore i swear.” you place your hand on his chest, staring at him. Neteyam is unsure, but sooner or later he gives in, he didn’t want to make you mad or annoyed. You lay on his chest, hearing his heartbeat. You and neteyam didn’t speak, not yet. It was a comfortable silence, when, you had a thought. You quickly sat up and looked at neteyam. Neteyam was quietly and peacefully thinking, when he felt a sudden movement, he opened his eyes and looked down at you. You opened your mouth to speak, but closed it once you realized how stupid your request was. Neteyam noticed this and tapped your arm, which of course caught your attention, he cocks his head to the side, you sigh. “Can i... can i touch your ears?” you ask, “I know it’s a stupid question but i’ve always wanted to..”, no reply. You took his silence for a no and pout, but before you could say anything he cut you off with a “sure,”, you perk up. “But why?”, honestly, you wanted the ground to swallow you whole right there and then. It would be embarrassing to tell the truth of why you wanted to touch his ears, it’s like asking another human being if they could touch their ears. But that’s the thing, Neteyam isn’t, your kind. The na’vi’s ears are different, you’ve always been intrigued. “It’s just.. different from my kind. And im curious.” you quickly say before straddling his lap and getting a bit more closer, personal space? never heard of it. You tell neteyam to slink back a bit, just so his face was meeting yours, once that was done you started to poke and touch his ears, you touched the point of his ears. It was a bit weird at first, neteyam was tense. You noticed this and told him that you’d be quick, neteyam shook his head “it’s fine.” Neteyam kept his eyes on your face, you didn’t mind. You could feel his gaze but didn’t say anything or do anything, and again, is was silent. It wasn’t an uncomfortable silence, rather, it was comfortable. After touching his ears, you asked him if you could touch his marks, without even thinking he immediately said “sure”, you didn’t pay any mind to this, you just gave him a smile and a peck on his cheek. Your fingers lightly graze the darker blue marks on his face, arms and chest. When your finger first touched his mark he shivered. Not because he was ticklish or anything, it was because of the intimacy, sure you two have touched each other there and then (not like that.) but not like this, this was on purpose. The other times it was just by accident or by instinct, this however, was on purpose. He watched as your mouth curved into an “O” when you first touched his arm(mark), a brief “ooo”’ will occasionally come out there and then. You’re so cute. For neteyam, these markings were normal, everybody had them, but for you, they were unique, humans didn’t have these marks. His eyes softened, his gaze was tender and gentle. His yellow eyes never leaving your face. First it was his ears, then markings, then it was his fangs, then tail. He wondered why you’d want to touch his tail but then again, you weren’t like his kind, so he obliged happily. You went to his side where his tail was and grabbed it, it was soft, really, really soft. You brought it to where you were and observed it up and down, you stroked his tail, Neteyam still had his eyes on you, While stroking his tail you heard a low grumbling sound, it came from neteyam. He was... purring. He’s so cute!! you thought. He looked like he was in peace, his eyes were closed, and while the tail was in your hold it started to waver up and down, it slapped the ground and went up (like a lion’s tail), it did so for a few seconds. You let out an “eep!” when the tail slaps your hand, it wasn’t a very harsh slap so you didn’t mind. “Neteyam?” you called, no reply. You poke and prod at his cheeks but nothing, then you realize he’s sleeping. Little snores escape his mouth, you chuckle and moved yourself into a position where you’re right next to him on his side, you leaned your head next to neteyam’s and drifted off to sleep. His tail occasionally slapping the floor and flicking up before stopping to curl around your waist.

lo’ak x human! reader

“What are you doing here y/n?” lo’ak asks while eyeing you and looking behind you, seeing if maybe someone was following you, making you feel unsafe. “Just wanted to see you.” you say, looking behind lo’ak your eyes land on a couple of his hunting friends, that’s when you remember he went hunting. “hm.. how was the hunt? catch anything?” you question, looking up at him. Lo’ak breaks eye contact with you and looks to his side. Although he doesn’t say anything, you knew that it meant ‘no’, his face drooped once you asked that question so you don’t any other questions relating to hunting. But, without saying anything you gesture lo’ak to kneel down so that both of your faces meet. You cup his cheeks with your hands and make him look at you, “listen lo’ak, it’s fine if you haven’t caught anything yet. You’re still you know.. new to hunting. It’ll take some time and practice but i know that you’ll do it. I know you’ll catch something.” you said encouragingly, staring deep into his eyes. Lo’ak stared at you, taking in all the things you said to him. you know that he’ll do it. When he replays that sentence in his mind a smile slowly creeps onto his face, Your hands are still cupping his cheeks, you notice how he’s staring at you, he’s smiling like a mad man. He’s zoning out. Not only that, lo’ak is also thinking about when you gestured him to kneel down, you did that just to cup his face, to encourage him, to tell him that you had faith in him. Oh how he was so grateful that he had you in his life. But he snapped out of his trance after you shook him lightly (at first) and then shook him a bit more harder. Lo’ak blinked a few times before realizing that your face is extremely close to his. His eyes widen and pulls back a bit, “you okay lo’ak?” you ask, lo’ak nods and apologizes. After hearing him apologize, you pull him in for a kiss. It was a small and gentle kiss, nothing rough and deep. No way. “Lo’ak! you ready?” one of lo’ak’s hunting partner yell out, instinctively he swiftly places himself in front of you to cover your figure. Lo’ak turns around and gives him a nod. “You guys go first, i need to do something!” lo’ak yelled before rushing you deeper into the forest but not too far from the reef. You two were probably a few feet away from the reef. You and lo’ak sit down, using the tree’s trunk to lean on, “so, you just came here to see me? that’s it?” lo’ak says, turning his head to stare at you, feeling his gaze you turned your head to look at him, you nod, “yea of course, why not?”. “You wanted to see me that bad?” he says jokingly, a smirk appearing on his face. Lo’ak expects you to shy away, what he doesn’t expect is your response which is nothing like what he thought you’d say or react like. “I want to see you everyday.” you mumble. Lo’ak pauses for a second, taking that in. It’s normal for “mates” or, lovers in your term, to miss their loved one. He never knew if you truly loved/missed him or not, he’d never doubt you though, sometimes his insecurities creep around. But with your words it seemed like all his insecurities and worries disappeared. A light red hue appears on his cheeks, his ears tilted downwards, his tail started to sway side to side. Adorable. You suddenly perk up, almost snapping lo’ak out of whatever he was in, you stare intently at his features, his ears, tail, markings, fangs(when he yawned), but mainly his tail. It’s not everyday you see another kind that’s kind of like a cat. Lo’ak notices how you seem to be focusing on his ears, tails and his... mouth? “Y/n?” lo’ak says, you stop admiring his features and look up, you quirk your eyebrows and ask ‘what’s wrong’. Lo’ak is hesitant to ask you at first but reluctantly gives in. “What.. what are you staring at? i know you’re looking at my ears and tail, my mouth and my.. arms.” upon hearing this your eyes widen, were you that obvious? But it made sense at the same time, it was just you and him so he’d be distracted by nothing but you and well... there is a thing where people can sense when others are looking at them. You avoid eye contact with lo’ak due to embarrassment at first but after a few seconds and thinking, you maintain your eye contact again. “lo’ak, i was wondering if it was okay if i could touch.. them? touch your ears and tail and you know?” you say, looking at his face to see any signs that he’s weirded out or just a plain ‘no.” But nothing changes. His face remains the same other than him blinking, lo’ak smiles and gives you a nod. You’re surprised but say no more!! Lo’ak absolutely loves the idea of you playing with the features that humans don’t have, it makes him feel special, like he’s not the others even though he’s the same kind just like everyone on Pandora. You chose him, and he chose you. So why not allow you to touch him? He remains still, letting you touch his ears, letting you admire the way it points, and when you start to graze and touch his marks on his arm he jolts. Your touch is so gentle, you’ve always been so nice and caring to lo’ak, never touching him roughly, never raising your voice at him and guiding him during hard times. You look at lo’ak, you ask if everything’s fine, he nods and tells you to go on. And with that answer you resume to tracing his marks, you were hesitant to trace the marks on his chest but with a nod you continue on. You then moved onto his tail. He wasn’t so hesitant about letting you touch his tail, he didn’t mind, he grew up with one just like everybody, so, he was unfazed when you asked him if you could stroke his tail, and was confused when you were ecstatic when he said ‘yes’. When you told him about how if you just touched someone’s tail or an animals tail they would freak out and bite you. Depends on their background, aggressiveness and hospitalities. Sometimes, he still wonders if you ask permission to the animals if you could touch their tails. Still confused. You were like a child, playing with his tail, softly touching his tail, playing with the ball like fluff on the tip of the tail. Lo’ak was smiling the entire time you touched his tail and traced his marks. It felt intimate, not sexually. He found it adorable how you were so amused by just a tail, it was as if you’ve seen them, and wanted to touch them but felt that it would be too weird to ask or weird in general(the “as if” was very true..). Slowly but surely, it started to get darker, after yawning a couple of times lo’ak got up and picked you up, you were shocked at first from the sudden movement but when questioning where he was taking you two, you eased up. He was taking you two to the reef, where you two could sit down and admire the view. “this would be the perfect way to end the day.” lo’ak added at the end. Once you and lo’ak reach the reef he sets you down carefully and sits down, you too, sit down. There were still some others around but they weren’t too close to you two. Your feet splayed out on the sun, looking at the sun setting, the glistening water was breathtaking. That was one of the best things about moving with the metkayina clan. Their ocean, was gorgeous, the aquatic animals that live in the ocean were beautiful in nature. Lo’ak was right, this was the best way to end the day, it will always be when your leaning on his arm, and his tail hugging you closely.

tsu’tey x human! reader

“Y/n why are you... what are you doing here?” tsu’tey mumbles, looking down at you, who’s smiling brightly. “Nothing!” you reply, still smiling ever so brightly, you were just happy to see tsu’tey. Tsu’tey eyes you and stops for a second, thinking about what he was going to do now. Tsu’tey doesn’t bother to hide you, he was training some of the new hunters and was leading them, helping them track some of the local animals, giving them tips and tactics. He stops thinking though, when he sees you looking at someone or something behind him to the side, it was one of the boys he was training. You’re still looking behind him, but once he sees you giving whom he thought was one of the boys he was training, a smile, he turns around and yep, he was right. It was ru’ko. Ru’ko was returning your smile when he saw tsu’tey staring daggers at him, his smile faded but it was still there, it was like an awkward smile now. Before ru’ko turned around tsu’tey had given him a nod of direction to set the boys off for the day. Ru’ko saw and yelled out to the rest of the hunters to go now, he then ran off to supposedly to his friends and walked off. Now it was just you and tsu’tey. Once the boys were out of sight tsu’tey turned his head and looked back down. You were already looking up at him. Tsu’tey observed you once again, but this time asking if you were okay and if anything happened to the people or you. You shook your head to indicate that you and the people were fine and weren’t hurt, he sighed in relief. “I just wanted to see you.” you say out of the blue. You stare at tsu’tey, wanting to get a reaction out of him you go on about how you felt today, how you were so bored and wanted to see him, hang out with him. Every time you spoke about how you wanted to see him, how you wanted to talk to him and embrace him, how you missed him so much made his heart pound faster and faster. Once you were done with your rambling you looked up at him, he was staring right back at you and you noticed how his expressions looked soft, a small, soft smile was on his face, his pupils were dilated, he truly looked like he was in love. To say the least, it’s true, he is in love. Terribly in love. His ears were tilted downwards, his tail was swaying side to side, was he happy? but that was beside the point. He looked so adorable right now. Out of nowhere, tsu’tey kneels down and places his much larger hand on your shoulder and kisses your forehead, “I missed you as well, my love.” Upon hearing tsu’tey say “my love” your knees buckled and felt like jelly, you almost fell but luckily tsu’tey caught you quickly. Although you were looking down, you could feel that tsu’tey was grinning, he knew what he was doing to you. From the corner of your eye you see something swishing, it’s what you assume is his tail. You turn to your right to see more clearly if it’s tail, and it is. You already knew it was (kind of) since you see his tail everyday, swishing when he’s near you. You never really paid much attention to their tails, it was apart of them and you never dared to ask them questions about their tails. It was only now that you realized how soft it looked. Sure you’ve felt it curl around your body or waist when sleeping next to him but you never actually touched it on purpose, even when dating, you felt that it was too weird to ask if you touch his tail. Well, that was until now. You couldn’t hold in the feeling of wanting to grab that tail and smother your face with it. Once you stood straight tsu’tey followed where you eyes stared at only to see that you’re staring at his tail. His tail swiftly flicks to the other side, where you couldn’t see it. When his tail is out of your sight you look up and see that tsu’tey is glaring at you, but really he’s just inspecting your face. You pout and whine, wanting to look at his tail, tsu’tey takes notice of this, “you, want to see my tail?” he questions, and that stops your whining. In all honesty, this was most likely your one and only chance to ask him that one question you’ve always longed to ask for. You nod. At first, tsu’tey is hesitant, your eyes observe his face, looking for any signs of discomfort. You and tsu’tey are lovers mates, But not once did you ever ask him any questions like this. He pauses, thinking if he should let you, but then again, it wouldn’t hurt him or anybody so.. he allows you to do so!! You’re smiling ear to ear when he gives you an “okay :)”, it was certainly an odd request, but seeing how happy you looked when he gave you a confirmative, made his decision to allow you to touch his tail make him not regret it. Tsu’tey found you cute how you were so mesmerized by something that was normal for him and the others. He loved how curious you were about him, he knew that gradually you would be touching his tail, presumably his ears, markings, fangs(since the “sky people” don’t really have sharp fangs), and his necklace. There were trees everywhere, and if you looked beyond the trees you could see the reef, it was a beautiful sight. Your eyes were still focusing on his tail, it was still. “Sit down y/n” tsu’tey spoke, you nodded. You and tsu’tey sat down in front of a thick tree, you sat beside him, moving to your side to start playing with his tail, tsu’tey’s tail flicked up and down, tickling your arm and thighs which made you giggle. If only you could see how love struck tsu’tey looked right now. What a shame. You stroked his tail softly, afraid of hurting him. You absolutely loved the fluffy part at the tip of the tail, it was fluffy and felt like silk but a bit rougher, it felt nice to the touch. Tsu’tey was staring at you the entire time, how you were extremely close to him, your smaller hands grazing his tail, seeing your smile on your face made him smile, it always happens when you smile, when you smile, he smiles. Whilst playing with his tail you brought it up to inspect it closely, you looked to the side of the fluffy tip part of the tail where you saw his marking on his shoulder and chest. That caught your attention, everything you’ve always wanted to feel, touch or see up close from the very first time you saw the na’vi’s now all came into your brain. “Tsu’tey.. can i touch your markings?” you say while pointing at the markings on his shoulder. Tsu’tey follows where your finger is pointing at and realizes what you’re talking about, he looks back at you and gives you a small nod. You thank him and this time you’re on your knees, tracing the marks on his shoulder, down to his arm and some on his chest. Tsu’tey would be lying if he told you that it didn’t felt nice. It felt.. way too intimate, but he loved every second of it. What you don’t notice is how he has a small yet noticeable smile appearing on his face. Sooner or later you tell tsu’tey to go down a bit, he’s confused but complies, he then feels your hands prodding at his ears, tracing every curve of his ear, Seeing the small tear on his right ear you ask him how that happened. “An arrow. Luckily their aim was bad.” he says nonchalantly, with that answer you giggled, continuing to touch his ear. You occasionally peck his nose or cheek to give him some attention even though you already were. You stopped pecking him for a second, you were looking at his necklace now, you point at the bones on his necklace and question about how he got them, in return, tsu’tey gives you a smile and tells you how those were the bones of his first animal that he hunted. Letting out an “oooo” you ask more questions, how old was he when he first hunted his first animal? what was his first animal? tsu’tey answered every single one of them. The first animal he hunted was a hexapede, and the bones of the hexapede are the very ones on his necklace. How he was 14 when he was first taught to hunt. You pointing at the bones prompted him to talk more about his necklace. What is was made out of, the significance, the meaning, and why. Tsu’tey points and explains about everything you need to know, he loves it when you’re really interested in what he’s speaking about and how you ask questions after he’s doing speaking. Tsu’tey pointing and explaining goes on for a bit, But after seeing that the sun was setting and the sky was getting darker, you both agreed on going home now, so you and tsu’tey got up and started to make your way to the others. In the middle of your walk you’re suddenly being picked up by tsu’tey in bridal style, you instinctively squeal and wrap your arms around his neck, tsu’tey chuckles and keeps on walking. You were thankful he did that though, your legs were much more nimble and smaller than his, you turned your head to look at the sunset. It was beautiful. You turn your head back around and bury your head in his chest. After walking for a bit you were getting tired, yawning there and then. The sky was almost dark now. Your sleepiness and heavy eyelids soon took over, Your body went limp, your arms were still around his neck but he could feel it loosening. Tsu’tey’s eyes widen and he looked at your face, he was terrified, did you just die? but upon seeing your closed eyelids and your mouth agape, small and low snores escaping your mouth. His heart stopped pounding rapidly. It gradually went back to its normal state. When you woke up, You were inside your marui, Laying on its material. You could feel someone’s arm wrapped around you, turning around you see tsu’tey fast asleep. Your lips curve into a small smile, brushing your thumbs on his cheeks, you took off your mask and quickly gave him a kiss on his lips while cupping his cheeks, you put your mask back on and fall asleep in his arms, warm and comfortable, waiting for another day with tsu’tey.

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liking + following + reblogs are very much appreciated!!

another note: i actually feel so motivated to write probably because im writing something other than genshin lmao, finished this in a day and like a few hours. and as i said before, this is my very first avatar post!! so i hope you guys enjoys this. i haven’t wrote in this format since like ages so im sorry if it doesn’t make sense or if it jumps to one thing to another very quickly. i updated my fandom/future works post so check that out. and idc what you say tsu’tey and neteyam are still alive. ALSO HAPPY NEW YEARS!!! p.s send in some avatar asks pls i need ideas!! also i have another one coming up [an idea] but i haven’t written it yet so stay tuned...??

REQUESTS ARE OPEN!!

#avatar x reader #neteyam x reader #lo'ak x reader #tsu'tey x reader

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butchdykenormallen · 26 days

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so, new spotify update.

(pt : so, new spotify update.)

[id 1/ a screenshot of spotify on a grey background. text reads, in bold, "There's a monthly limit on lyrics". text under in grey reads, "Every time you tap "Show lyrics", it will count towards your limit. To get full access to lyrics, switch to Spotify Premium." A button in green reads, "Show lyrics", and under it, another button reads "Dismiss." /end id]

[id 2/ a screenshot of spotify on a slate grey background. Text reads above, "Lyrics preview". more text under, in bold, reads, "I've earned myself a reputation / That my bark is much worse than my bite / But I keep snapping at Goliath's hands / With all of my tiny might / There are no stones at my disposal". at the last line, it fades, and a box reads, "You've hit your lyrics limit for this month." a button under in white reads, "Learn more." /end id]

(screenshots courtesy of @thatweirdqueer , my boyfriend <3)

my boyfriend came across this message after clicking show lyrics once. they're forcing a limit on looking up lyrics to a song in their own app, and we need to talk about it.

at this point, spotify premium has been so forced onto us, that spotify is practically not even a free app. if you skip one too many songs, you have to listen to five or more ads. the dislike and like features they've implemented do nothing. everyday i boot up spotify, it flashes a larger than life ad with a button so small i can barely see it, just to dismiss myself. it tracks if you've bought premium to market these ads to you to guilt you into getting it back. you can't even download songs from it without premium. it's a barely functioning free app with everything locked behind a paywall.

if you want good lyrics for free, without having to pay a corporation for them, id recommend azlyrics, lyrictranslate, and searching the music artists channel. azlyrics doesn't have every song, which is a guaranteed, but its extremely easy to navigate, doesn't have many ads, and lays its lyrics out in a manner thats extremely easy to read. lyricstranslate has lyrics translated from many different languages, and can even translate songs into other languages on a whim. its run by people who can translate them, and is free to modify if you find a mistake. searching up the song on the artists channel (NOT the youtube owned topic) can help wield results as to what the lyrics are. one such example of this is femtanyl, who writes all of their lyrics in the descriptions of their videos.

adding onto this, if you'd like to download videos for free, whether it be mp4 or mp3, id recommend searching youtube to mp3 in an incognito tab! (id recommend this because some sites send you to rather sketchy websites sadly. they are efficient, you just have to ensure what you download is what you want. plus, it keeps it out of your search history if you share a browser with someone!) its easy, just copy the link of the video you want and paste it into the box. then, choose what file format you want it to be downloaded in, click convert, and now you have your own file downloaded for free. i've used this method for years now, and it hasn't failed me.

in conclusion, FUCK capitalism, DELETE spotify, and USE ALTERNATIVES.

-badger

#fuck capitalism #fuck spotify #fuck THIS #long post #important #loser_txt.png

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slavghoul · 1 year

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Phantomime is the band's third album of covers, after If You Have Ghosts and Popestar. Cover songs are usually the preserve of young, inexperienced bands. Is doing covers a way to maintain a link with your formative years and not forget where you come from?

Tobias Forge: Absolutely. I think it does that. It serves as a return to the roots, in the same way as for... I don't know, let's say someone who practices martial arts, who starts in a certain dojo and ends up changing it. If you want to become a good fighter, you have to move and train with different people. It's the same for a footballer: if you play with the same team all the time, your team might be very good, but you always have to play against others. I think the same logic applies with covers: it can help to go back. You don't necessarily have to release them. We chose to do a real album, but in parallel I worked on other songs - not only Impera music, but other covers. We selected the best ones, and said, "Let's put these out; this looks coherent and presentable".

How much did learning to play other artists' songs contribute to your formation as a musician? What were the most formative songs in your youth?

The answer to the first question is yes. Listening and playing at the same time is very formative. I've never really been... A lot of guitarists, especially, take the time to read tablature and learn how to play something very precisely, and in my opinion, theorise the music too much. I can't say that I'm not theoretical; I just don't follow the rules or the classic terminology. I try to categorise and understand the logic, but I do it in my own way, based on what I have learned over time. I never spent much time with tablature; I just played to the music. I would put the music on and play. I wasn't trying to learn how to play the song in the same way as the band. I would play as if I were invited to play with them. So my style is very free, because I played The Doors as well as Kiss, Slayer and DJ Bobo! It could be anything. Whatever I heard, whatever I listened to, whatever song I could get my hands on, I would play it. I think the chaos of it all made it... When you understand that, you understand the way I write, the way I do things, and why I sometimes seem to be a bit scattered.

That's what may surprise you when you listen to the EP: you can find Iron Maiden as well as Tina Turner...

Yes, I grew up with both, so it's not strange to me. But of course, in order to go from just wanting to do something to a homogeneous work that is supposed to have some commercial appeal, you have to make decisions. One of those decisions was, "If we're going to do this Tina Turner song, it really needs to be punchy." It's supposed to be a rock EP, it's got to be set to 10. I think that's what sets this cover apart from the moose. By the way, thematically, I didn't think of it as 'a Tina Turner cover', but as 'the Mad Max song'. It fits with the times we're living in.

Phantomime features a cover of Iron Maiden's "Phantom Of The Opera". Two years ago, you also recorded a version of Metallica's "Enter Sandman" for the Blacklist compilation. In rock, people like to pit the Rolling Stones against the Beatles, and I think the metal world tends to do the same thing with Metallica and Iron Maiden. Do you feel more affinity with Metallica or with Maiden?

[He thinks] Good question. I'm trying to formulate a coherent answer. I think... It's so fifty-fifty. Both. Not just in terms of inspiration, but in terms of their whole careers, especially when I was a kid. In many ways, like many fans of both bands, there's a cut-off date where my interest in new music started to wane. But I have such a love for everything they did before that it doesn't really matter. The limit is basically the Black Album and Fear Of The Dark. I mean, I like The X Factor, and Brave New World was an absolutely great comeback album. But as a kid and a teenager, settling down with Live After Death was such an inspiration - not just for what I was hearing, but for the tour dates and everything to do with that. Same with Metallica and the Black Album. That was the first time I saw them, and it was the first time I was confronted with commercial greatness in metal, when a band is on top. It's happening now, they're the biggest band of all time. They're playing in such and such an arena, but when they come back next year, they'll be doing such and such a stadium. Even back then, I had a hunch that not only were they great, but they were doing well in life. These guys are getting richer by the hour [laughs]. That's the kind of thing that matters when you're twelve. "And imagine all the girls they get!" That kind of nonsense.

And of course, these bands inspired me musically and professionally and brought me a lot of joy, but they also became mentors in my professional life. I have so much gratitude and respect for those two bands. If I were to be super picky and specific, I would say that since we are a more melodic band, we are probably closer to Maiden. Metallica is more of a "speed" band, I think. To be honest, what I've always liked most about Metallica, and especially on my favourite albums, which are a lot of people's favourites, is not the speed. The speed and the violence on those albums are just added value. The reason their music was so great in the 80s was because it was so melodic. It's the melodies. What changed in the 90s was that they stopped the melodies. They became a blues band, and all of a sudden all the movements were different. It wasn't neoclassical like in the 80s or on the Black Album. I'm very neoclassical myself, that's why I feel so close to the melodic side of Metallica. On the other hand, I spent my teenage years listening to death and black metal, so I love big riffs and speed and stuff like that, but that's not what we do with Ghost.

For a long time, fans have been asking who could be the Maiden or Metallica of tomorrow. Considering the impressive success of Ghost, do you think you have an answer to that question?

Obviously, I know that George Lucas and Steven Spielberg will die one day, but I don't think Wes Anderson or Quentin Tarantino can be considered as a replacement. These directors don't have that much in common, but you know what I mean, I hope. I don't see us as taking their place. You know, I try to be as transparent as possible. What I do is very much inspired by those two bands. I try to do it in a different way, and with respect. But of course, from a practical point of view, when the day comes when there's no more Iron Maiden and you want to see a rock concert with staging and solos, you can come and see us. It's a very curious concept, but it's obviously relevant, because we live in a time when the previous generation is disappearing one after the other. I think Lars [Ulrich] and James [Hetfield] have spoken about how the physicality of their music is not the same as the Rolling Stones. Charlie [Watts] playing the way he played when he was seventy-nine or eighty, it's nothing like what's expected of Lars. And what is expected of James is also very different from what is expected of Keith Richards, with his very open chord style. The meticulousness of James' riffs and Kirk's solos can be difficult to achieve at eighty - and they're approaching sixty. Kirk already has them, by the way. So, as much as I don't want to think about it or remind people, nothing lasts forever. Sooner or later, fans are going to have to decide which bands they want to go see, because a lot of the people they grew up with won't be around anymore.

Your cover of "Enter Sandman" was very "ghostified", while "Phantom Of The Opera" is more faithful to the original in comparison. How do you decide how to approach a cover? Are there songs that offer more latitude in terms of arrangement and appropriation, and others less?

There are several factors, which differ from song to song, and the result can therefore be different. If you go back in time and take "Waiting For The Night", for example, I always thought that song in its original form... Obviously it's cool, but I thought there was a bigger song underneath. In the original, it's diffuse, vague, underlying. The chords are just hinted at, and the vocals suggest that you can build something bigger around it. When I did the cover with Dave Grohl, he asked me, "Can we do a really slow version of it like Trouble?" I said, "Yeah, that sounds cool." And of course, working with Dave Grohl, it seemed like a good idea at the time. In the end, we thought it was too slow, too heavy and too long. It was a good idea, but the result was not very convincing.

Enter Sandman' and 'Phantom Of The Opera' were conceived in two different ways. If someone had asked me to do a Metallica tribute, I would have accepted, but I would never have chosen 'Enter Sandman', in the same way that few people would choose 'Paranoid' or 'Smoke On The Water'. You automatically try not to pick the biggest hit. But in this case, it was Swedish television that asked me to play. It was for a music award, and they said: "Since Ghost and Metallica are close, you are seen as friends, so you should open the show. And we want you to play their biggest song, 'Enter Sandman'." I asked, "Do I have a choice?" And they said, "Not really! We want you to do it, otherwise we have to rethink the whole show. Could you think about it?" OK, I'll think about it and see what I can do. So I started to play the song and see what I could get out of it. The original structure of the song is very simple, and the melody, like "Waiting For The Night", suggests chords that they don't play. All I had to do was see which chord suggested the melody and fill in the gaps. I ended up with a five-minute arrangement. If I sing the melody with a guitar, this is what chords it suggests. That's the somewhat academic version of the song. I was at the stage where I had a completely different version of the song, and I recorded it and thought, "Fuck, I hope James doesn't hate it..." Because I don't want to disappoint anyone. It's supposed to be a tribute. My version was like, "You guys have all my love, but I was forced to do this! And in the end, the result was great.

"Phantom Of The Opera' was a bit different. I knew I wanted to cover a Maiden song, but not just anything, of course. I wasn't going to do 'The Number Of The Beast'. I've had fun with 'Phantom' in the past, because it's a long song and quite complicated. As a musician, it's quite common to sit on the couch and try to figure out a riff. What are they doing there? [What's the rhythm? How are they counting? Because I couldn't hear the beat. And suddenly, once I understood how the beat works in this song [he sings the riff while snapping his fingers], I thought: "Wow, you can't hear that at all on the record. You can't hear anything, it's just a controlled mess." I managed to figure out how to play other elements of the song, and I was like, "Now I have a reason to record it. Not because I want to improve it, but to come up with a different version where you can clearly hear the different parts." First of all, it was a personal experiment in the studio. I wanted to record it to see what it sounded like, and suddenly, after working on it for a few hours, doubling the guitars, adding the drums and playing everything perfectly with metronomic precision, the track was different and a bit updated, so to speak. So I said to myself, "I'm going to take the gamble of covering this song, and see what happens. It seemed like a good reason. I'm not saying my version is better, I'm just saying it's different. There's a bit more contrast and fluidity, you can hear the different elements better. It underlines how good the song is.

Phantomime's covers also include Genesis' 'Jesus He Knows Me'. Genesis is a rather peculiar band, which started out in progressive rock and ended up with huge radio hits. Do you find yourself in this ambiguity, in this duality?

Yes, I do. The other band on that level that did something similar is Pink Floyd. In the beginning, their music was really strange, really eccentric, and then they became more and more pop as the albums went on. People still mistakenly think they're a prog band, whereas 'Wish You Were Here' is really just a series of four pop songs stretched to the max. Not only am I very inspired by that, but I also feel an affinity with that kind of thing. You try to come up with variations of the traditional, if you like. You try to change the form, to present elements that people know in a different way. It's a bit like running a fusion restaurant and offering an Asian-inspired onion soup and adding coriander to the dish. It's still recognisable, but you try to make the recipe different. Another analogy is Stanley Kubrick, who told stories that weren't very complicated, but presented them in an epic way because of their façade - literally. It was the choice of set and costume and the attention to detail that made the difference. That's why, as a composer, I always try to go back to the simplicity of the writing; the simplicity of 'Another Brick In The Wall'; the simplicity of 'Comfortably Numb'. It sounds like a huge, epic song, but it's not complicated at all. They have a lot of songs like that. For a lot of songs in the Genesis catalogue, especially in the later part of their career, the only thing that makes it a bit weird is the middle part. In "Jesus He Knows Me", that's one of the things that made me want to... Not only have I always loved that song, but there are three factors that made me want to do my own thing with it. One: it's a very upbeat rhythm. The way they play it is so quiet that it literally sounds like they're playing on the table [he beats the rhythm on the table] with an acoustic guitar. There's a real metal track in there.

Do something with those guitars! [Laughs]

Yeah, but I'm glad they didn't, because that means we can! I'm really surprised that a band like Metallica never covered this song, because it sounds like a song from Garage Days. It has the same atmosphere. So I thought, "I'm gonna make it sound like a Garage Days song by Metallica. And I fucking hate the bridge of the original, when they go into white boy raggae. I like reggae, but this is the whitest reggae in the world! And it totally destroys the song. As much as I've always loved the song as a whole, I've always hated that part. So getting rid of that section and making it very heavy was also on the to-do list. I had to go into Trouble mode on this. And of course, that goes without saying, but the lyrics were also perfect. It's meant as a tribute, even though I spit on that bridge a lot. But they've done a lot of these kind of prog bridges, like "Let's do anything here", and they'll throw in a rumba or something like that. Some people might find that really interesting, but in most of their songs, I don't think it adds anything. But yes, Genesis has a lot of... I like a lot of their older prog music, with Peter Gabriel, although I think they almost became even better after they split up. Peter Gabriel did his own music, and he did it very well - very epic music. And Phil [Collins] came in on vocals and they did their own thing. To me, it was the best of both worlds, even if it sounds sacrilegious to say that. I'd love to see Peter Gabriel come back and sing with them, that would be cool, but their separation brought so much to the music, between Peter Gabriel's career, Genesis' career and Phil's career. That amount of work, man!

It's one of the few cases where the split was a real success for everyone, and the result is as good as the original band.

Absolutely, I think so. The most amazing thing they could do now, especially now that Phil is not in good shape... What I wish they had done, or could have done, or would do one day, is a triple tour. For example, Phil and [Peter] could do a solo show each to start with, maybe just five or ten songs, and then get together with Genesis. That way we could have 'Here Come The Flood', 'Another Day In Paradise' and 'In The Air Tonight', and then a bunch of Genesis. I think everyone would love to see that. It would be the perfect concert. For me, it would be one of the best experiences possible.

You see, that's the kind of idea that made Ghost into Ghost. If you can come up with a plan like that for other bands...

[Laughs] You can always call me before it's too late, guys!

Another band that has come up with sophisticated yet super catchy music is Def Leppard, especially on their multi-platinum album Hysteria. Speaking of which, this year you released a new version of "Spillways" with Joe Elliott on vocals. When you hear him on this track, the link is obvious, especially with the very elaborate backing vocals. Would you draw a parallel between your approach to songwriting and arranging and that of Def Leppard?

On this album, yes, because I tried to emulate elements of... It's something that's been done throughout their career, but especially on their two biggest albums, Pyromania and Hysteria, the length of the songs is remarkable. It's very common these days, especially in pop, to be very fussy about the three-minute limit. In the pop world, there's this need to always get to the chorus very quickly. You have to start with the chorus, go straight to the point all the time. In the 80s, there was more courage in songwriting - a more adventurous side. Songs like 'The Riddle', for example, were very strange, very proggy. There were weird chord progressions and stuff that nobody does anymore. The pop world has been so chicken for so long. Of course, I've always had an ear for pop; I'm not exactly impressed with what I hear today, but in my life I've always listened to the radio and liked a lot of what I heard, especially the 80s super hits. That's totally my thing. And I love Eurodisco from the early 90s. There are a lot of great composers in that scene. Max Martin started in Eurodisco, at least professionally, but before that he was in metal. What makes him such a great composer is his metal ear. He was writing Eurodisco songs, and then all of a sudden he started writing huge pop songs for the Backstreet Boys and Britney Spears. This whole school of Swedish songwriters is made up of former metalheads, former rockers, former guitarists.

So I wanted to challenge myself in my own songwriting, because sometimes I keep it too short. Even though "Square Hammer" is a good example of a well-written song, it was almost frustrating, because I thought, "OK, that's one more song like that. Now I have to stop doing that, because it was almost too simple." It was a very intuitive song; I literally wrote it in ten minutes. I had the melody, I played it, and the song wrote itself very quickly. There's almost no finesse in that song, and I thought I should avoid doing the same thing again, because it would be too easy. I wanted to see if I could write in a Def Leppard way. On Hysteria, there are six, seven, eight singles, a good half of which were huge hits. In 1987 or 1988, they were on a par with Coldplay at the height of their career, that's for sure. How could they write five-minute songs, with like five distinct parts? It wasn't conventional, verse-chorus-verse-chorus writing. It was verse, another verse, pre-chorus, bridge, and then finally, after two minutes, you'd get to the chorus. And it was so rewarding, because it was such a long way to get there. I thought, "This is what I have to work towards. I want to dare to add another part, dare not to follow the path. That was a mental exercise I did on Impera, and I'll try to do better in the future. It's an interesting way to challenge yourself.

When people talk about the length of songs on the radio, I always think of the story of "Bohemian Rhapsody": "This is going to be a disaster, it's never going to be played on the radio!" That's it, yes...

For a long time they called that song "Freddie's thing". It's such an anomaly in the middle of what we've just been talking about. Of course, I don't recommend... For a young band that's just got a contract, it's best to avoid the six-minute "Rhapsody". But if you can find a compromise between 'The Passenger' and 'Bohemian Rhapsody', I think you've got something.

On that subject, how did Joe Elliott end up on "Spillways"?

The story is very simple. I talked about Def Leppard a lot before Impera came out because of the mental exercise I mentioned, and both Phil and Joe had been talking about Ghost for a few years. It got to the point where our respective managements wanted us to do something together. In the modern world, that often means collaborating, as hip-hop artists do. I explained that I was willing to explore the idea, but that for me, a collaboration is a trendy but outdated concept. We do it all the time. In hip-hop, it's almost ridiculous to see... If an artist is hot this week and you go look at the American top 40, it's just "this artist feat. this other artist". I totally understand that one plus one can sometimes be three, but it gets very cynical. I don't want to do things cynically. I sing cynical things, I'm a cynical person, but I don't want to be cynical about my fans or my career. So I said yes, I would discuss it with Joe, but we'd have to see if we could agree on something, if there was romance in the air.

Joe and I sent a lot of messages to each other to try and arrange a meeting. He lives in Ireland, but also in LA. I live in Sweden, but I also spend a lot of time in LA, so we tried to find time to see each other. He was getting ready for his tour, I was getting ready for my tour, and we were just hanging out. And then out of the blue, he wanted to experiment; he went into the studio, recorded some vocal lines and sent them to me. I thought it sounded really cool and I said, "Look, I have nothing but good things to say about what you did. It sounds great. I'm not surprised by your voice, but by the fact that we sound so good together. I like that very drawling vocal, you really added something. But I have no desire to throw this on Spotify and say to people, 'Here's another thing you can buy.'" I asked him, "You know we do little skits to communicate with our fans in a funny way? Instead of posting on Instagram saying we'll be in such and such a city, we come up with little episodes." He had seen a few and said, "Yeah, that's funny. Let's do something funny with that." The gag is the important part, and the end result is a bonus.

It's like what we did with 'Kiss The Go-Goat' and 'Mary On A Cross'. The idea for the episode came first, and then we said, "OK, but we need a song. So I came up with the idea for this 60s-style sketch that was "Kiss The Go-Goat". Then, as I was writing and recording 'Kiss The Go-Goat', 'Mary On A Cross' came up in the process, and I thought, "Great, now we have a B-side! It'll be a physical single." So I put that in the script: "Let's start showing the single, now that it's official." Things work in tandem. Looking back, we now know that the end result was different. It was meant as a joke. There was 'Kiss The Go-Goat', which was the joke itself and was very successful. And then it turned out that "Mary On A Cross" was completely different. That's also what I told Joe: we do this to mess around with the band. My job is to write records and entertain people, but apparently I also have to communicate with my fans, and do all this promotion that I'm not really interested in. I have no problem doing this interview, but I don't want a fucking Instagram account where I post pictures of myself. I don't want to be that person. So, I'm doing this so that people... They're diversions, and sometimes those diversions become cool. "What do you say, Joe?" In the end, we found this way to spend time together and do something fun. Instead of turning our creativity into songs, we turned our creativity into episodes. It became something fruitful and fun, and I think it was a great success.

The title of the EP is clever, as it mixes the terms 'ghost' and 'pantomime'. The latter term is defined as "a type of musical for the entertainment of the whole family". Is this your goal with Ghost? Do you see the band as "a musical for the whole family's entertainment"?

Broadly speaking, yes. Of course, that suggests that the more adult elements and innuendos in our show are suitable for children, which I don't claim. But I would also like to stress that I have never asked people to bring children to our shows. So if the children in question are exposed to jokes involving penises, farts and copulation, that's their problem. I grew up in a very liberal family, where there were very few barriers and no censorship. I think it's possible to have a conversation, if others are open to it. I have no problem with whole families coming to us, as long as no one suffers. So, for me, it is indeed entertainment for the whole family. But I wouldn't sell it as such to most people, because there are still elements that are not suitable for all children.

I remember a Rammstein concert where I noticed children in the audience. I thought it wasn't really a good idea... Ghost seemed a bit more appropriate, but for young children, some things can still be a bit biased.

It's hard for me to have a clear line on this, because I'm not just speaking as a musician, but also as a parent. There's a constant debate about the right age to talk about certain things. Now, with two teenagers, things are more open. But that's one of the weird things about being a semi-public figure, talking openly and publicly about your life and what you do and sharing your opinions. My kids read that, too. They are aware of it. As soon as I say something, especially nowadays, where everything becomes a meme or a clip... People may think what I say is funny, which I don't mind, but my son and daughter, now fourteen, heard it when they were eight or ten. It's hard for me to be a parent and say, 'Go to school! Don't do that", when they know perfectly well that I didn't follow any of these precepts. I'm not trying to lie to them at all. I tell them: "I did this, I don't recommend it. I did this; I totally neglected this other thing. But I was lucky and I got there. My career isn't over, so I don't know if I've really "arrived", but for now, I'm here. It was a bit silly of me to be so confident, to think I could burn all the bridges, burn all the ships and throw the oars. I was lucky enough to make it to land, but I don't recommend this technique. Don't do the same thing! [Laughs]

#the band ghost #Tobias Forge #interview

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johnslittlespoon · 2 months

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i was so excited to listen to glass animal's new song 'creatures in heaven' today and instead my heart has been ripped out because it's so awfully painfully fitting for our mota boys (i'm currently making an angsty heartache–y edit to it lol whoops) BUCKLE UP because i need to yell (and keep scrolling if lyric analysis/song fics aren't your thing <3)

also tumblr keeps screwing with the formatting ignore that pls lol

What do you think about when you think about love? I'm dumbstruck when you're tender, but It's three in the morning, be in the moment It tears through my head, does it haunt you too?

i mean, the imagery. pillow talk, sneaking off base before dawn, vulnerability and raw honesty laying side by side in a field, looking up at the stars and wondering which ones are the people they've lost looking down at them, every peaceful, happy moment laced with the knowledge that so many friends will never get to have another one.

You held me like my mother made me just for you You held me so close that I broke in two

fuck my life. dave bayley count your days. these lines are just so viscerally painful and stunning? john feeling like every core of his being was made to fit gale, like puzzle pieces slotting together, the gaps in his life filled the moment gale enters his orbit. both of them never having experienced being treated so gently and with so much reverence, feeling taken apart and put back together in each other's arms.

You pass through my head, does it haunt you too? Never really said that I loved you, too

heavy on the angst here because this reads like post–war john pov, filled with regrets but plastering on a smile as he watches gale marry someone who isn't him, aching to tell him how he feels but knowing it will only make a mess of things. and more than anything, he wants gale to be happy, and if that means staying quiet and loving him at arm's length, he can do that. but late at night he can't help but wonder if gale ever thinks about what could've been, if all the moments they shared haunt him too.

Lucky, lucky you, 'cause I'm fortune's fool Such small words but they hit so huge

this reminded me of gale's father and his gambling and how despite everything he falls in love with john, a gambling man. such small words (don't count on it) but they mean everything :(

I don't think I realize Just how much I miss you sometimes We were young and so in love

this hurts on SO MANY LEVELS. i immediately read this as curtbucky– john never gets time to grieve, everyone just has to keep trucking on. but sometimes late at night it hits him so hard he feels like he's drowning, realizing how empty of a space curt's left, how much he truly loved him, the first person to make him feel that way.

but also can be read as buckbucky, both of them properly feeling the emptiness of not being by each other's sides for the first time before they reunite at the stalag, maybe both having a feelings–realization moment when they're hit with how wrong everything feels when they're apart.

or, post–war, john aching for gale and wishing on everything that he can just fall out of love. he knew that it would be hard, going back home and going their separate ways, even with the promise to stay in contact, but it's so much harder than he ever could have imagined.

Three in the morning, safe inside Bury me here in your laundry pile

ouch ouch ouch. a few images: john seeking out one of gale's worn shirts after his plane goes down, falling asleep with it pressed to his chest in his bed. or john stealing one of gale's shirts before they all go back home post–war, shoving it to the bottom of his suitcase, sleeping with it every night despite the way his stomach turns, feeling hollowed out as the smell of him slowly fades away. or, john staying at gale and marge's house for the wedding, having a breakdown the night after, finding himself on the floor of their laundry room at three am, curling up in a pile of dirty laundry just to feel close to gale one last time before he goes home in the morning.

I don't see the point in a subtle romance Ten tonne heartache sitting on your back

john is so all or nothing with love; when he's in, he's in, barrelling full speed ahead, giving it all up for his person. maybe the secrecy when they first start seeing each other is okay at first, little midnight rendezvous, but he craves more, he wants a future with gale so badly, he wants a house and a wedding and kids and a dog and sitting side by side on a porch at eighty years old. but he knows that gale is giving him all that he can right now, and it's better than nothing, so even though he wants so much more, he'll settle.

Scared of the crack where the light comes through I'm only really me when I'm here with you

ughhh both of them being so scared to be really seen by someone that it's terrifying how quickly they grow close. that nauseating feeling you get right after opening up to someone for the first time, the feeling of holding your breath waiting for rejection– but it never comes. they accept each other with open arms and patience and unconditional love and they show each other what it's like to be able to be so fully unapologetically real with someone for the first time. a shell of themselves when they aren't together, like they're missing one half, and it's so obvious that everyone around can see it. they share the same name for a reason.

And it gets into your head like a cosmic zoom Coat on the door like an old space suit So long cowboy, you're so cool Cash in hand with a memory of you

okay, ngl this just made me think of john ditching his coat that gale hates– even in the heat of going up on a mission, it's still in his head, enough to go through the motion of swapping it out. so long cowboy just sounds like something sweet he and curt would've said to each other honestly; thinking about john saying it again when he looks up at the stars the night he finds out curt didn't make it.

cash in hand with a memory of you? come onnn it's literally the lucky deuce. may as well have just slapped that bit of the song behind the scene of gale going through his belongings when he makes it back to base, picking up the cash and thinking about his man. </3

–anyway! apologies for the word–vomit, sometimes i just get a song wedged into the front of my skull and i am paralyzed from doing anything else until i get my thoughts out about it. and it's truly such a gorgeous song, 10/10 recommend if you feel like crying, been listening to these guys for a decade now and they never disappoint.

literally gonna agonize over making an edit for this for hours to get the vision just right and would not be surprised if i end up writing a oneshot inspired by it lol i adore every song they've put out but this one just gripped me so strongly the moment i pulled up the lyrics with how perfectly it slotted into the mota–verse. <33

#i don't even know how to tag this #curtbucky and buckbucky pain ig lol #johnslittlespoon brainrot #this is so funny literally no one cares i just needed to get this out of my system #thank you and fuck you glass animals for another stunning song #also i was looking at the album tracklist and one of the songs is called 'how i learned to love the bomb' watch that give me brainrot too #july nineteenth will be my last day on this earth methinks #johnslittlespoon musicrot

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harucafelatte · 1 year

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𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐝𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐝 𝐟𝐥𝐨𝐰𝐞𝐫𝐬, 𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐜𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐫𝐬 𝐟𝐚𝐝𝐞

synopsis: drabbles on why the relationship didn't work out and how it affects them

pairings: suou tsukasa, sakasaki natsume, sena izumi, saegusa ibara x gn!reader (separate)

genre: angst with absolutely no comfort (depends on how you want to interpret)

content warnings: lowercase intended, not proofread, really just relevant lyrics so people who know the song may go “what?”, wrote this at 2am and on my phone so don’t come after me, self-doubt (tsukasa), slight resentment towards reader (ibara), natsume and ibara are a bit mean to the reader, crying (izumi)

song: dried flower by yuuri

word count: 1,896 words

author's note: wrote this after listening to enhypen's jay covering 'dried flower' with the original artist, yuuri! (please listen to it!!) jay sounds so good singing in japanese?! also, special thanks to @venushotline for allowing me to use her format! do check out her works!

taglist: @kazemiya, @tomago (fill in the taglist form to be added)

you who now stand next to someone else / i wonder if it's going well for you

SUOU TSUKASA always self-doubted himself

"tsukasa? are you alright? you've been really quiet the entire time." your concerned voice snapped him out of his thoughts.

"o-oh? have i? sorry…" he replied, giving you an apologetic look, "and don't worry, i'm alright."

lies. he wasn't alright.

in fact, he found himself questioning your relationship with him for the past few months. am i treating them well? am i doing the right thing? they didn't seem too happy with the gift i got them, did they not like it? do i deserve them?

"if you say so…but please tell me if anything's bothering you, okay?" you smiled. you got up from your seat and walked out of the room, leaving tsukasa slightly flustered.

there it was. the smile that made tsukasa fall in love with you in the first place. he swears that you have the best smile in the world. i'm so lucky to have them as my partner.

wait…are they lucky to have me as their partner?

tsukasa grumbled. he knew he had to discuss this matter with you soon.

the next day, tsukasa sat you down on the couch and knelt in front of you, holding both of your hands. "i'm sorry, y/n…i just think that i'm not the one for you and that you deserve someone better. someone who treats you well. someone who can make you happy every day. sadly, i can't be that person."

you knew about tsukasa's lack of confidence but you never thought it would affect your relationship. no matter how much you tried to comfort him, he insisted he would never be enough for you.

"don't say that, tsukasa! i'm sure that-" you were cut off by tsukasa wrapping his arms around you burying his head into your neck.

"i think it's best if we went separate ways, for the benefit of us. i'm truly sorry, y/n." he mumbled. he stayed still for a while before he finally pulled away.

"it was an honour to be yours, y/n…" he whispered, placing one last kiss on your forehead.

tsukasa thought his worries would go away but he was wrong.

ever since the two of you broke up, he couldn't stop thinking about how you were doing.

are they happier? did they find someone better? are they taking good care of them?

tsukasa knew letting go would be difficult. you were one of those who knew about his lack of confidence and always helped him with it. he would always be grateful for having you by his side.

and the thought of you standing next to someone else makes him sick.

such a sad break-up but / time makes you forget

SAKASAKI NATSUME’S harsh words hurt you

"what do you know about this indusTRY? what do you know about being an iDOL? it isn't as easy as you think it iS!" he snapped, glaring at you with annoyance reflected in his eyes.

you were taken aback. you were trying to comfort natsume who was upset about messing up the choreography for one of the performances. tsumugi warned you about natsume being in a bad mood and advised you to leave him alone but you couldn't stand to see him being so harsh on himself. all you did was try to cheer him up but it seemed to do the opposite.

"stop acting as if you understand because you clearly don'T. you're not helping me in any waY. useLESS..." he mumbled the last part under his breath, thinking you wouldn't hear it.

you did, and without saying another word, you left the room.

a million thoughts ran wild in your head as tears threatened to spill. does he not love me anymore? i was just trying to comfort him. did he ever love me?

that night, when natsume arrived home, he was shocked to see you packing your belongings. were going to leave him?

"are you…going to leave mE?"

you turned to look at him, "i think it's for the best."

"is it about what i saID? you know i didn't mean iT!" he was now getting desperate. he didn't want you to leave him.

"natsume, you should be careful with the words you use. not everyone in the world will take them lightly, even if you don't mean it." you say as you walk past him with your belongings. "i'll be staying at my apartment so don't worry about me. goodbye natsume."

as the front door closed, natsume felt a wave of guilt wash over him. he couldn't believe you were gone. and it was all his fault. . . . after you broke up with him, natsume couldn't stop thinking about you even after trying to convince himself that he had to let you go. it was as if you cast a spell on him.

he missed waking up you sleeping next to him every morning, adoring your peaceful form. he missed returning home to you greeting him with open arms and pulling him into a hug that never failed to make him immediately melt into your touch, allowing all his worries to leave his mind - you were more important. he missed all the times when the two of you fought, laughed and cried together.

why couldn't he stop thinking about the memories he made with you? ah, that was because he still loved you.

and all he could do was wait for the memories, which he held close to his heart, to fade away.

colors float in the darkness / red, yellow, blue in the depths of my heart / keep calling out your name / feelings of love still leave a scent

SENA IZUMI was always away

“you’re not.. you’re not leaving again, are you?”

izumi averted his eyes from his watch to you. you were leaning against the door frame, staring blankly at the cup of warm tea in your hands.

"look, y/n, you know how my job requires me to travel overseas." he sighed, running his fingers through his hair.

"i know…but you just came back…do you really have to go?" you asked, eyes still not meeting his.

silence filled the room. the two of you knew the answer to the question.

finally, you raised your head to look at him and spoke up.

"izumi, i don't think this working out." you smiled softly, trying to mask your sadness.

izumi's eyes widened upon hearing your words. he knew what you were talking about.

"it's just that…you've been so busy with work these days, we haven't been able to spend time together. i just want to be with you but it's almost impossible with you always away..."

the moment you finished, izumi hugged you.

"i'm sorry for not being able to be a good partner, y/n." he whispered. and with that, you allowed yourself to let all your emotions out. the once-silent room was filled with your cries.

none of you wanted this but nothing could be done. . . . after the two of you broke up. izumi tried to keep himself busy with his work but it didn't work.

walking through the streets of cities was no longer enjoyable for him knowing there was no need to find a gift for someone dear to him anymore. in the past, he spent hours in different stores to find a gift for you, knowing that it was the least he could do for you to make up for the time he couldn't spend with you.

whenever he was away, the two of you video-called each other regardless of the time difference. as long as one of you was heading to bed, the other made sure to pick up the call. izumi missed hearing your soothing voice and spent every night in his bed thinking about how you were doing.

"i'm sorry, y/n…i still love you…"

he wished his message could reach you.

your voice, your face, your awkwardness / all of it, all of it I hate

SAEGUSA IBARA always put his work before you

"all you do is work! did you forget that you have someone living with you? a partner?" you groaned, walking out of his study to try to calm down.

"y/n!" ibara called after you.

it was happening again. another one of your weekly arguments over ibara's tight schedule was happening again.

all your friends thought that you and ibara rarely argued due to his composed nature. yes, when the two of you first got together, arguments were rare. he was patient and loving, always finding time to spend time with you. all that changed one day, he began coming home late from idol training and shut himself in his study to work on business issues.

how you wished things could be the same as they were in the past.

ibara found you on the couch, with your arms crossed, and walked over to sit next to you. the moment he sat down, he saw you tense up. confused, he asked, "you okay?" "ah, i was just thinking about something…aren't you busy with work? " you replied, looking away.

"just wanted to spend time with my beloved." he smiled slightly, placing a hand on your head. usually, the gesture would instantly make you feel better so it came as a surprise when you brushed his hand off.

"oh so i have to remind you about having a love life for you to spend time with me?" you asked, slightly irritated.

"what are you trying to say?" ibara questioned, raising an eyebrow.

"you know what i'm trying to say! this place is always quiet! i'm always starting the conversations and checking up on you! have you ever thought about checking up on me? do you know how worried i am about your health? you haven't been getting enough sleep these days. you always push people away. i just thought you’d never do it to me." you snapped. " and you know why? apparently, to you, work is more important than anything, even your own health!"

"is that how you feel?" ibara hissed. "do you still not understand how important my work is? if you can't support me, then maybe we should break up."

surprisingly, you didn't feel sad when he said that.

"fine."

after you broke up with him, ibara told himself he hated everything about you.

whenever he thinks about the memories you made with him, he hates your smile, your voice, your laugh, your touch, your flaws, and everything else about you.

but all the hate disappears when he sleeps - when he dreams about you.

he loves your smile, your voice, your laugh, your touch, your flaws, and everything else about you.

there was something different about the dreams from the memories. although the memories reminded him of the fun time you shared with him, they also reminded him of the arguments he often had with you. however, the dreams showed him the possible new memories he could have made with you if he had not broken up with you.

if he had just tried harder to show you how much he loved you.

flowers that have yet to wilt / i place with you / forever, forever, forever, forever / hold on to them

he couldn't bear it anymore.

he misses you so much.

no matter how hard he reminded himself that the relationship had ended, he couldn't stop thinking about you.

he wants to see you, hear your voice, feel your touch.

he wants to be with you.

all because he still loves you. . . . now, he is waiting at the meeting spot, holding a bouquet of fresh flowers.

he had texted you the day before, asking if you were free to meet him today.

he did not receive a reply but saw that the message was delivered and seen.

there was little hope that you would show up. still, he held onto that small hope.

suddenly, he heard footsteps approaching him.

he took a deep breath, clutching the bouquet tightly.

was it you?

#esworks #☕︎ barista's latte #☕︎ the newest item #ensemble stars x reader #enstars x reader #ensemble stars x reader angst #enstars x reader angst #suou tsukasa #suou tsukasa x reader #sakasaki natsume #sakasaki natsume x reader #sena izumi #sena izumi x reader #saegusa ibara #saegusa ibara x reader #ensemble stars #enstars

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girlfriendsofthegalaxy · 11 months

Text

tuesday again 7/11/23, timezone change edition

the last time i wrote one of these things, i was not quite fully packed up in ma. now, i am technically temporarily homeless in houston, bc the apartment i originally signed on was completely unlivable. crashing in an acquaintance's guest room for a bit while i have a very bad time with apartment hunting round 2

i have lived in south florida, staten island, and various shithole student housing. i understand seasonal bugs in hot places and things such as different kinds of roaches and palmetto bugs. when i say that apartment had the worst roach infestation i've ever seen i fucking mean it. in theory i will get my full deposits back, but they're taking their sweet fucking time about it.

but having that full yes-i-know-about-seasonal-roaches conversation with new acquaintances and leasing agents takes too long so i've resorted to saying it had a horrific bedbug problem, which everyone seems to go Oh Okay Yeah Reasonable For You To Leave much more quickly.

listening

a lot of early aughts dance pop standards, to chase away the agonies as i drive to and from apartments only to get ghosted, find they were rented a week ago, or find that they look absolutely nothing like the pictures. i was really torn on which britney song to pick for this week until my sister sent me Twin Flame by Maude Latour, which i can only describe as "douchebag get the girl back song but for lesbians". spotify

also how do we like the "featured link from bandcamp or soundcloud with additional spotify link" format? in an ideal world i would buy all my music directly from the artists but realistically i use spotify 90% of the time. i don't know what your life is like, tell me if this is helpful or not.

reading

my best friend made sad faces at me until i read The Flatshare by Beth O'Leary, and it was a little nice to see someone else's dire housing situation get resolved neatly and with thematic consistence in several hundred pages. it was also nice to text her snippets with "WHAT?????" every so often. this is a reading experience i don't have very often bc our current reading tastes don't overlap even a little bit.

i don't have much to say about it bc i didn't have particularly strong feelings and don't really read mainstream straight romance, so i can't point out what this did differently or well compared to its peers. if nothing else, it was a fluffy bit of distraction, and i think that's kind of the point?

(image from Tor) also read Saad Z. Hossein's Kundo Wakes Up novella in a waffle house while eating some of the best scrambled eggs i've ever had in my life.

this novella was the closest thing i've ever read to "aging English professor has an affair" without actually containing any of those elements. generally i enjoy his work, but this was sort of a way to check up and tie off many characters from previous works with a sort of light frosting of "my wife left me and i don't know why [ rot13:v pna znxr fbzr thrffrf ohg gurer vf ab zbzrag bs frys-ernyvmngvba, bapr ur svaqf uvf jvsr ur whfg perrcf ba ure sebz nsne naq nsgre qrgrezvavat fur'f abg jvgu nalbar arj znxrf gur gerzraqbhf fnpevsvpvny qrpvfvba gb yrnir ure nybar op fur'f zhpu unccvre jvgubhg uvz. gurer vf ab zbzrag bs frys-ernyvmngvba nobhg jul fur zvtug unir yrsg uvz. xhaqb arire trgf bhg bs uvf bja shpxvat urnq bapr.]"

while The Gurkha and the Lord of Thursday novella (TREMENDOUS) and Cyber Mage book (fun but with some dire pacing issues) are fairly standalone, i cannot imagine you'd get much out of Kundo Wakes Up if you haven't read the other two. for some reason none of the libraries i have access to have his other book Djinn City, so we'll have to procure that elsewhere.

watching

the dnd movie, the day after i broke my lease on the roach apartment. i don't remember a ton about this movie. do generally like a heist. michelle rodriguez was hot

playing

genshin. listen. it is a free and familiar way to turn my brain off by doing open world exploration and puzzles but CRUCIALLY! most of it is completely new to me. i have not played this game in a year and a half. i have not played this game since right before enkanomiya. there was no chasm. there was no Sumeru. i have absolutely no idea what’s happening lore-wise.

i pulled for the fancy ice claymore lady and got a catboy archer (at least i think it is a catboy? the ears do give a pharaoh hound vibe... he is distinct from the extant dogboy archer). not terrible but not my vibe.

youtube

i have been enjoying the shit out of the temporary summer event carnival space. they really did pull out several stops by introducing a ton of genuinely interesting and innovating little new mechanics and mini games. delightful!

making

altering the worst shorts ive ever seeeeeeeeen with a demure little two-inch side slit on both legs bc my thighs simply will not quit. mens shorts are so much better than womens shorts in nearly every way except for the catastrophic physical fit issues.

when i got ghosted by two different apartments on saturday i bought myself a spoon ring so chunky it makes my other chunky rings look positively delicate by comparison. not very comfy to drive in but fine to wear while tippy tappying on the spreadsheets

a girl i saw for one singular awful date in 2016 called my hands "coarse but honest" and i think about that every time my hands are in a photo. what did that even fucking MEAN, [REDACTED]?

#tuesday again #tuesday again no problem

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myymi · 4 months

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ohh if you can i would appreciate some tips!! honestly writers are so admirable we dont give yall enough credit🙏🙏🙏

well, for me to give you the absolute best tips i can to help out, i need to know what exactly you're struggling with when it comes to writing. there are about a million different tips i can give you for about a million different things and some of those tips will be completely useless to you

for now though, i'll give you the things that help me getting into a writing mood + general tips i give to new writers and if you still need further help you can explain what exactly you're struggling with and ill do my best to help out;

1) whatever you learned about formatting essays; forget it.

a common thing i see in new writers is they try to write it like an essay. which isn't a bad idea really, but it is restricting. your paragraphs don't have to be four or more sentences. they can only be one if you want. it's your story, format it however you want. you don't need to follow rules

2) listening to music

this is mostly for when you have that one specific scene in your head but have no idea what to do for the rest of the fic. listening to music and connecting the lyrics to the characters you're using is a great way to get your mind thinking. one song can give you several different ideas depending on how you interpret it

3) make sure you are in a good mood

personally, i cannot write to save my life if im upset or just generally having a bad day. i know some people can use creating as a way to cheer themselves up, but it just doesn't work out for me lol

4) if you don't need background noise, don't use it

it's pretty easy to get distracted when writing, especially when you have something new playing. if you do need background noise of some kind, i would advise playing instrumental music or that one movie/show that you've seen a thousand times and could quote in your sleep. keep your focus on your writing

5) brackets will be your best fucking friend when writing

one of the most important things about writing is keeping your flow going. if you find yourself writing sentence after sentence for a good while and then you suddenly hit a stop because you don't know how to word what happens next; throw it in brackets and write the scene after it. its the same reason why you're told to skip questions you get stuck on when taking a test. let your brain do what it knows it can and come back to the tricky stuff later.

6) you don't have to write anything in order

you don't have to write a story exactly start to finish. you can jump between any scene you'd like and find out how to connect it to a different scene another time. this kinda ties into the last tip in the sense that you gotta let your brain do what it knows. if you only know the beginning and the end then write those first and figure out the rest as you go. if you need to edit either one of the previous things then that's okay. there's no shame in changing things around, it's just how creating things go. sometimes change is needed

7) writing prompts

for new writers, i like to tell them to find a prompt online to write a story for before they start their own. using a prompt someone else made keeps your brain from getting overwhelmed, allowing you to focus more on finding a writing style that works best for you. using writing prompts also lets your brain find ways to contribute to a story without having it make everything while also figuring out how to put it on paper. it's easy to overwhelm the brain, so let it get used to writing before you start creating your own ideas. (this is also something i advise to people who experience burnout or just cant think of anything to write. your brain just needs a break from creating ideas right now, go and find a prompt for it)

8) word count

listen to me because this is so important; ignore the word count. you need to focus on learning, not how much you're writing. it doesn't matter if you only wrote 50 words when other people have fics well over 50k. ignore it. you are learning, you'll get there eventually. if you focus too much on how much you're writing you're going to stress yourself out and ultimately drive yourself away from ever writing again. treat word counts as milestones. start with 50, then 100, then 150, then 200, etc. let yourself work towards it slowly rather than push yourself too hard right out the gate. you can't expect to draw the mona lisa the first time you put a pencil to a paper, so don't expect to write thousands of words the first time you write a story. it'll take time, and that's perfectly okay.

9) analyze the shit out of your characters

this is easier when writing fanfiction, but take a few hours to learn your characters. find the content they're in and hyper-focus on what they're doing. pay attention to their speech patterns, their body language, their relationships with others, etc. if they're not in a scene, try to imagine they are and what'd they do and/or say if they were. it'll help out with keeping them in character when writing

10) if you get to a point where you can't write anymore even when using brackets; stop writing for the day

we have our limits. you will get to a point where you can't get another word down and that's okay. it doesn't matter if you've only written a handful of words, close your program and wait until you feel motivation hit you again. if you keep trying to force yourself to write when you just can't then you're going to burn yourself out. the most probable reason for this is writer's block, which means you need to focus on other things for a while. give your brain time to recollect itself. it's annoying, i know, but it's better for you if you just let your brain do what it needs to. it knows how to take care of itself, so let it.

i also have a tag i use whenever i give tips, so you can check those out as well to see if anything helps! it's just writing tips

#if these end up not helping you that is okay #everyone is different #what works for me wont always work for you #mess around with it until something does work #just remember not to push yourself too hard #learning takes time. don't rush it #writing things #writing asks #writing tips #anon #anonymous #anon ask

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catty-words · 2 years

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because my ever after (2011) list helped me find the marianas trench corner of tumblr and i want to celebrate being among my people and also because i simply cannot resist the allure of this format as one ideal for expressing my appreciation for music on which my brain likes to chew,

a non-exhaustive list of things i love about masterpiece theatre (2009):

- themes!!!! this album’s exploration of performance vs authenticity is its beating heart and like, i’ve gotten the sense that it’s the work that really carved the band’s name into the tree trunk of canada’s popular music scene - nevermore to leave there (heyooo) - which makes the bitterness that runs through the album’s veins so so potent. this album is biting me biting me biting me and i never want it to stop

- how the title functions as a mission statement. one of the identifying characteristics of the band’s work following this album, and arguably* including this album, is that it’s serving at least forty percent theatre at all times

“masterpiece theatre i”

- first of all, the fact that this album includes a piece that has three separate movements (and the way this makes ‘symphonic rock’ the objectively correct way to sort marianas trench into a genre thank you very much)

- the tune-up is such a nice touch, why lie? yes kings, i am on the edge of my velvety seat, i am at the theatre!!

- please note that when i mentioned captivating prologues being a hallmark of the band’s work, i was thinking of “masterpiece theatre i” as the next best example to “ever after”

like, a thesis statement for an album what could be better?? the performer (i am consciously separating the art from the artist, josh ramsay et. al., but i am also kissing you directly on the mouth) feels the curse of the performance as much as he can’t live without it.

- the line every word is calculated because the closer i look, the more i see the loving care with which every creative choice in the band’s discography was made so like. say👏 that👏

- the soft plosiveness of this is just a part i portray and how it makes the refrain really fun to sing along to, as well as all the more powerful as the performer’s greatest plea to his audience, that they recognize the divide between authentic self and performance

“all to myself”

- the punch to the face that is the transition from “masterpiece theatre i” to this song

- how it belongs among the ranks of the band’s most danceable numbers, i never can sit still listening to this one

- i’m half asleep, and i am wide awake because, yeah. constantly, forever.

- ostensibly, the way it’s about a romantic relationship, but like.

you can just as easily read the chorus in the context of the performer speaking to his audience. the push of “isn’t the very act of creating art asking for attention, we’re only giving you what you want”, the pull of “if i’m constantly performing for you, when does the mask end and my truest self begin?” we - audience - are literally making the performer feel like someone else.

- this isn’t what i wanted but / i can’t keep my filthy fuckin’ mouth shut firstly because it fucks!!! but also because of how it fits into the album’s larger theme. fame isn’t what the performer wanted, but quite literally he’s not keeping his fucking mouth shut! he is in the act of making music for us! biting me biting me biting me

- chorus variation to round out a song, my beloved

“cross my heart”

- the way this song bewitches me into doing some bastardization of the hand jive every freaking time

- however you would describe these three bad bitches and their contributions to the structure of the song

- just the whiny, slutty energy of this one in general and how well the little bursts of guitar string feedback build up this feeling throughout the number

- the way and i do want to show you, i / will run to you, to you, til i / can’t stand on my own anymore sets the stage (theatre!!) for the speaker/performer/narrator’s pervasive attitude toward relationships and how he’s constantly swept up in the capital R-Romance of this conception of love while simultaneously having to unlearn it for the sake of his beloved, album in and album out

- how the clapping and then the music phases back in during the bridge

“beside you”

- y’all ever croon?

- this is not going to be accessible to anyone else but it’s my list so. the lyric when it’s in your spine like you’ve walked for miles because so much of my logged marianas trench time has taken place while i’m working, moving between my silly lil dog walks and i’m literally walking for miles and do occasionally very much feel it in my spine

- the words you want are out of reach, but they’ve never been so loud for the way it captures something so small and yet so profoundly true about being a person

“acadia”

- nostalgia!!! and how this song is the album’s first attempt to unpack the authentic self in the performance vs authenticity dynamic. is who i was when my childhood home was my one and only home my one and truest self?

- just like. the way i wonder about the names dropped and how my curiosity necessarily plays into the album’s theme. if they’re real people the performer knows, then he’s shilling out something intimate in an attempt to heighten his art - though, to be fair, he’s doing it in a way that’s not completely accessible to us, there’s only so much to a name itself - but if the names are completely made up, then the performer is merely playing at authenticity to bait us into reading intimacy in his art. and doesn’t that make your brain want to eat itself?? biting me biTING ME BITING ME

- god, the way this song is so well-accomplished at bottling nostalgia because like every memory comes on / when i hear that old song / that we used to sing / with the words all wrong immediately evokes thousands of moments that have tied me back to my childhood. this song really said ‘the power of music!!’ and then repeatedly knocked me on my ass with the truth of that screaming crying throwing up etc.

- not to keep harping on this, i know you guys get it, but like, the way ran out of gas on the highway / we walked there, and i gave / drunken speeches / on sobriety makes me feel like i’m part of this anecdote! i’m there, recalling that stupid speech alongside the performer. stop pulling me so close if you don’t want more kisses directly on the mouth!!!

“masterpiece theatre ii”

- the way the first verse reads as a direct response to “acadia”

after giving us so much of himself, the performer’s inclination is now to draw back

- the way the whole movement feels almost bashful compared to its powerhouse counterparts because more than the other two, “masterpiece theatre ii” is about the performer considering his performance from the audience’s perspective, about his understanding that he’s beckoned us closer but, regrettably, still can’t bring us all the way inside for how that’d destroy him.

- the refrain i’ll burn out and slip away posing the questions to the audience: can we forgive the performer when, eventually, he no longer has more art to offer us? can we turn around and recognize his humanity like he’s acknowledging ours?

“sing sing”

- how the brash opener - can i have your attention? - reads particularly cheeky coming off “masterpiece theatre ii”, where the performer just cautioned us that too much of our attention causes him to slip further and further away, and sets the bratty tone of the whole number perfectly, perfectly

- nothing captures the performer’s feelings about his relationship with his audience as succinctly as the “sing sing” chorus

this is destroying his health, but he still wishes that he were an endless well for us, full of freshness and vitality and all that we need

- just, obsessed with hear the sad little sounds as they fall from my mouth because i DO i AM

- the way the song’s brattiness comes out especially in the bridge. i’m partial to the whininess of gets very hard to drink to my continued success because like, boo hoo. i can’t toast to how popular i am :( it comes at the cost of being adored by you :(

- don’t you ever tell me i’m not loving you best because i WOULDN’T you DO

“good to you”

- GOD but the way they literally invited an audience member (i.e. a fan) to join the performance?? the way that heightens the tenderness this song has for the performer-audience relationship, even as both parties are actively getting a lil messed up by it?? gonna just drape myself on a fainting couch for a minute

- the way the chorus reinforces this read, especially when the performer and the audience sing it as one

hello????

- the way looking at the song through this lens literally just reframed the lyrics i thought i saw a sign / somewhere between the lines for me. here we are, experiencing recognition of the self in the performer’s art and thereby forging an intimacy he has no access to. AHHH!

- so yeah, every love song on this album is actually about the complex love between performer and audience. we are the object of our favorite band’s affection!! we are corrupting each other with our codependency!! ain’t love grand?

“celebrity status”

- they didn’t have to make our return to bitterness for the way performance muddles identity so sexy, but they did and they did it for me, to make sure this album never stops BITING ME

- the PANTING and how evocative it is and, like, yeah, you got me josh ramsay et. al. put me in horny jail, i am once again fuckstruck by your music. but you’re the ones who made it this way so do not pass go, do not collect two-hundred dollars

- the lyrics trading in who i’ve been for shiny celebrity skin / i like to push it and push it until my luck is over because once more with the succinctness of this album’s theme but also because it builds on the drunken speeches on sobriety moment in acadia by making me feel like i know the performer being invited as i am to share a wry laugh over how Much he is at any given moment

- the way i wonder why, why, wonder why, why i oughta / let you wreck, resurrect whatever you wanna tastes

- for all the sexy sardonic tone of this number, there’s a beautiful little ray of hope in the line there’s a piece of me they’re throwing back at us if only for the way it builds on fix me (2006)‘s refrain of the speaker losing bits of himself (see: “say anything”, “september”) by implying that the performance, despite the sea of inauthenticity he sometimes finds himself drowning in, offers the performer the chance to know himself better. it’s a refracted image because of the audience, but he does get to experience recognition of the self in his art, too.

- the way hope also lives in the i’m trying refrain. overwhelmed and cynical about the odds, the performer is still putting forth the effort to be authentic, still putting forth the effort to create art. you gotta keep running up that hill, bitch!

“perfect”

- the seamless fade of “celebrity status” into this song

- if the point’s to never disappoint you / somebody’s got to tell me what to do because it’s very real and it makes me want to pull my hair out in chunks!!!

- i love how pointed the inclusion of this bit

feels because, on one level, “perfect” is about cultivating your image and your art until it’s as appealing as it could possibly be to the masses, and so borrowing a line from the far less polished and palatable (affectionate) “sicker things” builds on that in a delicious way

“lover dearest”

- first of all, shoutout to their ‘live from inside’ concert for unlocking the power of this number for me and, like, i am once again unwittingly roped into active participation in this album’s theme but!! can we grapple for a sec with how watching a performance - seeing the performer laid raw, specifically - is what woke me up to the emotional core of this number?? 😬

- so. you know how some words can be used often enough in a sexy enough context that you can’t help your pavlovian response to them? they lowkey get you hot no matter how they’re brought up? josh ramsay et. al. are responsible for making ‘taste’ one of these words for me (this time that we waste, but i still love your taste)

- the way i’ll just try to hide it, or i could slip into you / it’s so easy to come back into you builds on the “masterpiece theatre i” refrain of you’re beautiful / can i hide in you awhile? and how in general this song really shines a light on the codependent nature of the performer-audience relationship. the fact that this song is also about struggle with addition is like - woof - the performer traded his old vice for the thrill of the performance and amassing an audience and have i mentioned lately? BITING ME BITING ME BITING ME.

- the leave me wail. reblog, you agree.

- how the bitter in you and the quitter in me / is bitter in you and the quitter in me being reminiscent of the “shake tramp” bridge makes my brain go brrrr

“masterpiece theatre iii”

- the way the tinkling xylophone (??) intro automatically brings the drama. i am once again on the edge of my velvety seat!!

- the i’ll wreck this if i have to / tell me what good would that do / i’ll wreck this if i have to refrain being followed-up by a creeping couple bars of i’d be so good to you and how it’s a call and response between the performer and his audience. consenting to the wreckage of the masterpiece is how we, the audience, can be good to the performer. it’s how we could show our most unselfish love.

- how weaving “celebrity status” into “cross my heart” continues to highlight the album’s interest in the act of creating art being essential to the performer’s personhood while the audience’s act of consuming the artist alongside the art turns around and cheapens the performer’s identity all in the same breath

- and then also how the outro makes explicit the connection between “lover dearest” and “masterpiece theatre i”

and the way it all adds up to acknowledge the codependence without resolving it??

- and then these motherfuckers have the audacity to sprinkle on a dash of “say anything” (that’s the thing i’m sensitive about!!!!!!)?? the way i never took you for a trick but sometimes i don’t know what you want serves as the performer’s last acknowledgement that he needs to hold the audience at arm’s length because our want for his art is so monumental that it threatens to overshadow him???? the way i could take it if you need to take this out on someone beckons us closer one last time, invites us to use the art as a mirror????????? UNFAIR, I AM GNASHING MY TEETH

*in conclusion: all these songs being in conversation with one another gives the album a really satisfying cohesion and sets up what’s to come in the band’s later works, though it ironically lacks the rising and falling action that’d convince me to count it among the more theatrical pieces in their discography. it’s my rotten soldier, my sweet cheese, my good time boy, and either my second or third favorite marianas trench album, depending on what day you ask me.

#marianas trench #masterpiece theatre (2009)#to anyone who left tags on the ever after post - i love you #to anyone who listened to ever after after reading the post - i am kissing you directly on the mouth

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awalkthroughiris · 1 year

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U2’s The Joshua Tree

hi people! i have no idea what i'm doing but i wanted to post this before i forgot to hehe, i wrote this a little bit ago, but i wanted to share, i fully don't expect anyone to read this but if you do, let me know what you think! i'm so sorry if the formatting is weird, i've never used tumblr LOL.

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Listening to U2’s The Joshua Tree for the first time,

randomly 1-2am on a Friday night.

I’m actively finishing the first track, Where the Streets Have No Name, as I’m writing this. I’m not sure why I’m here, or why I’m awake even, but here I am listening to my first U2 album. I’ve of course heard of U2 before, my parents have played their music throughout my childhood, but the only song I could name is With or Without You, and I honestly don’t even know 90% of that song. Recently, I’ve been listening to the band Inhaler, who’s frontman is Bono’s son, Elijah Hewson, and my parents heard me listening and nonstop talking about them, which in turn has become them telling me to listen to a U2 album. I don’t know why I’m deciding to listen now, but I feel like maybe I’ll have some cinematic existential revelation by listening to this album, but that’s the romantic in me talking.

Okay, about to start track 2 now, but I love track 1, it made me want to drive, somewhere where there’s an arch of trees with arms of sunlight reaching my face. Now that I’m thinking about it, that makes complete sense in terms of the lyrics lol. I guess the same message was conveyed musically as well.

The production of the second track, “I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For” is very pleasing to my ears. This song is distantly familiar to me, I can think of driving to Oregon in the summertime, venturing back roads and this song playing, maybe after Lovers in Japan by Coldplay played. As someone who believes in God, Jesus Christ, and the Holy Spirit, I can’t help but feel emotional while listening, but this could also be my nostalgic ties.

With this gentle emotional twist in my stomach, and the building of tears in my eyes, With or Without You has begun. My dad said recently how “emotionally evocative” this song is for him, and to be honest I didn’t and probably still don’t understand the way he meant it, but with the placement of this track in the album, I certainly can’t help but feel emotional. It’s giving me a similar feeling to the song A Real Hero in the context of the movie Drive did for me the first time I watched it. The lyrics are so simple yet I find there’s so many ideas and situations I can attach to them. I almost feel as if any interpretation I have would be invalid since I’m just a teenage girl, and a teenage girl who’s never even fallen in love or honestly had any remotely intense romantic feelings.

A switch in pace, Bullet the Blue Sky is playing. It’s easy to feel the angst in the lyrics, with the repetition in the drums and bass, it weirdly feels like slam poetry. This isn’t something I would typically listen to, but I definitely don’t mind it, the guitar break provided a nice amount of time to just, think.

Running to Stand Still’s intro reminded me of a Jeff Buckley cover, Lost Highway. It also makes me think of folk music. The way thoughts in folk music are expressed seemed to be some factor in the way the song is structured, honestly no idea whether that is intentional or not.

Red Hill Mining Town, took a turn I wasn’t expecting at all, I’m kinda grooving out though right now. “You I can’t live without”, since this is a first listen I don’t know the tie, but an allusion to With or Without You?? Oh my goodness, I totally recognize this song as well, the “I’m hanging on” that kicked in around 1:25 is something I recall. It’s weird how my brain hAnGs On to specific parts of these songs. I need to revisit this song after doing some research though because I have no idea what the commentary on this song is for.

There’s so much energy in In God’s Country, it’s refreshing. One of the things I notice with my music taste is that there’s a lack of creative percussion. Which I certainly don’t mind, but listening to music like this helps me understand how, for lack of better words, bland, the other songs can be percussion wise. I don’t have any context to who Bono is really, besides that he’s seemingly been painted as some sort of insufferable humanitarian, but the religion driven metaphors in the lyrics are very interesting.

Trip Through Your Wires might be my least favorite song sonically honestly. I don’t want to be mean, but it just isn’t my favorite. I’m not entirely sure what it’s reminding me of, but it gives me the feeling of an old western setting, which I find, not bland or empty, just not my cup of tea I guess. A complete sidenote though, I am DEFINITELY getting tired as it has hit 2am now.

I’m really liking One Tree Hill so far. One thing I’m really liking about this album, is the places it literally takes my mind to. I think I’m a very visual thinker, these songs evoke blurry pictures that are grounded in nature, images like running through tall grass or driving in some of my favorite places that remind me of my childhood. It feels pretentious to say “my childhood” when I’m 17, but I think it’s easy to understand what I mean. On another more relevant note, this song feels like its painting out an image of what absorbing life feels like: ambedo.

Although it might be the “weirdest” song on the album thus far, I’m enjoying the sonics of Exit. I like how bass heavy it is. Upon further inspection, because I had zero understanding to make of the lyrics, this song was made from the perspective of a serial killer, due to Bono’s reading of a novel. What I found creepily interesting however, was the fact that Robert Bardo used this song as part of his defense for stalking and murdering Rebecca Schaeffer. What I find especially creepy about this, is that I listened to a podcast about this case. An unsettling coincidence.

Continuing on in this unsettling feeling, Mothers of the Disappeared is a heart-wrenching tribute. I don’t think I have much to say about this one, because I have just learned the context to the song’s making and it’s just heartbreaking, I can’t even imagine what families went through. It’s a needed not-so-gentle reminder of what reality can be, and what it is for a lot of people. Its easy to forget that the horrors we hear of are actually real, at least this is the case for me, a girl who has lived in the same city her whole life and generally stays blissfully ignorant. A great finish to the album.

#music #80s rock #alternative #80s bands #aesthetic #grunge #lyrics #song lyrics #u2 band #blog #musician #jeff buckley #inhaler #inhaler dublin #elijah hewson #bono

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the-official-account · 1 year

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Episode 19 liveblog take two

We made it happen!

@threeofheartscast

Because I do actually really want those notes on QC. Listening at 2.35 speed which sounds....awful. but useful! Semi from memory this may not be entirely in order

OMG HI!!!! I KNOW YOUR FROM THE TWITTERS!!!

QC elf, brown eyes and longhair In ponytail wears all black suit, gloves, book, robin-mask

Is this sir thimby person thinbleton? Sigil on card with future slanted font helmet with two crossed swords

Despite the fact that it's morally wrong I kind of ....yk maybe let him kidnap diamond a little bit? Some light kidnapping

I love how his first insibt when a fire starts is to stick to the CEILING. How are those lungs looking bestie

This music is GROOVY

IF ITS NOT GAY ITS GOT TO GO he's gonna love the agents.

For vellums kidnappings minimum 7 times depending on

-if random count extra,

-or if he wandered away and someone picked him up,

- didn't notice kidnapped,

- kidnappers forgot him and he just left,

- infodumped until the kidnappers got so annoyed they let him go

-about to walk into an open net while reading but manhole instead

The music is not as good as 2.35 speed

This entire scene was very cute and my original reaction included a lot of keysmashes. Vellum just went for it I appreciate that.

I feel like if there was a field agent hand book vellum would have at the very least edited it.

Xbala and spar having kissed us very soar behavior

Fic of them eating dinner after 2nd kiss before hotel

Vellum giving him a kiss. Draw spar half up in bed, with his face in vellums shoulder, vellum looking soft blushing (this shit is cute) muttering, petting his hair "mmmm breakfast is good, important part of the day....mmmm yup" -spar

Their argument here is the best

I FORGOT VELLUM SAID "YOURE VERY CUTE LIKE THIS" THATS A FUCKING DORABLE

I'm just gonna assume spar has a thing for suspenders

QC just Speedran becoming a coming of interest in a kidnapping (so fast the kidnapping hasn't happened yet)

HE HAS TELEKINSESIS what a little guy... He's so absurd in the best way i adore him. In my mind he is a Manlet I will die on this hill

Jack has a druid parent... Sanguinia. Stays with "g/Cladia" friend in...........city stoneloft

RADIO MOVIE NIGHTS ARE SO CUTE

I remember freaking out about greggins and Jack being qpps (just like me, fr!)

"Intense feelings and situations"

Grey just know it wasn't worth lying to vellum, he's too smart

There was a lot of freaking out about Max being the kid, but I landed on the theory that Grey both kept them seperate and wants vellums blood because Max is a werekid, and it wouldve been traumatic for both of them to raise them together but maybe vellum can help him find a cure. I can understand why there would be so many feelings messed up in all that

Vellum got SO cold in this question and I don't mean in a mean way but it's the...determination

Grey does have the best outlook on clovenheart & I think that's sus

Persuaded the FUCK outa him

Providince......don't thing I trust this. Grey's in his Gatsby era

"Fix other harms that needn't have happened"...........*squinting* return magic?

I WANT GREY TO COME BACK now that's she's less immediately evil) sus

Also I DID say I thought resurrecting vellum's parents could be a part of Grey's motivations!!!!, I did say that!

I really like joy

your sparkliness sounds very diamond

QC and the agents being at odds with eachother at this party sounds like the setup for SUCH a good time

HELL YEAH!!! Songs were groovy. Formatting still banging. I made a note herea out how juggling scenes like that is hard but Jordan did it really damn well. Kitt's so funny!!! I'm excited that they're here. QC is just a funny little guyyyyy he's just a little guyyyyy!!!

Note: hey future lushlet if you get up to wiki shit dont trust this I make hella typos

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bookwyrminspiration · 2 years

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so about the headcanon that Tam Song has depression and/or anxiety, what are some opinions you have about the symptoms that he would experience, and how he would handle it? my boy has social anxiety and needs Linh to order his food at restaurants, change my mind. (but really, as somebody with severe depression and anxiety, and Tam as a comfort character, this headcanon means a lot to me)

I love those headcanons! It's both satisfying and cathartic to see characters dealing with similar issues/situations/feelings that you do, among other things. That being said, here are some of my thoughts on what symptoms and coping mechanisms Tam might have!

the cuffs of his shirts are always a little more worn than everything else because he bites on them when he's nervous

he bites his shirts because he used to bite his lip a lot but he's trying to be better about that one and find another outlet

when he gets really anxious, he'll start to get lightheaded, bordering on vertigo, and needs to take a moment to reorient himself and breath through it

time seems to slip by him sometimes, hours, days, weeks passing in a haze, and during those hazes he doesn't really talk to anyone. not intentionally, it just doesn't happen. one day turns into two turns into two weeks of missed hails and unread messages.

his rooms gets messy, even though he doesn't have a lot of things. items slip out of place and he just gets rid of things so he doesn't have to deal with them.

that part is something friends help him deal with, though not many people are allowed in his space. when he goes awol for a while someone will drop by to check on him, to open the curtains and put on a happier playlist and help him straighten things up.

he's always judgemental and quick to snap back at people because he's trying to hide how vulnerable and exposed he feels in group settings, and sometimes afterwards he regrets some of the things that he said

when working with his ability he's almost always dealing with thoughts telling him he'll never be good enough. that he's not strong enough, that his ability makes him less.

he tries not to say it, but it's written on his face. when they were kids, Linh made him a little bracelet with letter beads that spell "worthy," and he's always kept it as a reminder against those thoughts. over the years he's made himself more bracelets because the reminders do help, things like "enough" and "valued"

both a combination of insomnia and overwhelming nerves can keep him up sometimes, for a variety of reasons. maybe his heart is beating too loud or he can hear too many sounds at once, sometimes sleep is just a lot harder.

those nights, he has a playlist he listens to of quiet songs to try and at least keep him calmer. he doesn't put more remorseful or sad songs on the playlist, because he learned the hard way that's way more likely to send him into late night everyone hates me and nothing matters thoughts, which he wants to avoid

when he gets anxious he starts to tap things, unique patterns with his fingers over and over again to give him something to do with the incessant energy his mind is throwing at him. sometimes he focusing on regulating himself so hard he stops processing everything else, stops bearing conversation and stops responding, but he'll try to play it off if people notice

talking to people always wears him out a little even if he likes the person because he's so high-strung, constantly waiting for the catch. Just like when he spoke to Mr. Forkle, he's always running through worst case scenarios in his head and bracing himself for the most far-fetched

he's not 100% adapted to dealing with everything and has some hard days, but he is legitimately trying to get better about it and making progress

this is more of an informal format than I usually take to answering asks, so if you'd want me to go through and be more methodic and connect things to canon, I'd be more than happy to do so! but until then these are some of the thoughts I first had when you broached the subject. I love him very dearly <3

#kotlc #keeper of the lost cities #quil's queries #tam song #kotlc headcanon #nonsie #tam is the character ever to me #so these headcanons also mean a lot to me as someone with pretty bad social anxiety #though I guess the official diagnosis is called social phobia or something now #they switched things up on me #but regardless. tam is an excellent character to project on and process things through #so I am always down to talk about him <3 #long post

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explosionshark · 1 year

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hiii i just wanted to ask two things: 1. how do you find so much time to read as much as you do? i have several books on my shelf that i'm going through at a snail's pace, lol. and 2. with as much music you listen to, do you ever get a song stuck in your head distracting you as you read? i feel like this happens to me all the time

Hey! The answer for the first question is multi-part, so I hope you don't mind me rambling a bit.

The shortest possible version is that it's a mix of routine and the fact that (aside from listening to music) reading is my primary form of entertainment. I mean, I DO watch movies and TV, but usually with other people. When I'm alone and relaxing after work, it's usually with a book.

Tbh over the last handful of years I've noticed myself having a harder time focusing on watching shows or movies without being distracted. I'll go into something with the intention to focus and absorb and find myself eight minutes in with my phone in my hand, having to rewind bc I got distracted scrolling through my messages or my Tumblr feed or whatever and I've missed something. Reading is easier for me to focus on when I'm by myself because I can't multitask it. I'm doing it or I'm not.

Another thing that helps is mixed mediums. I'm pretty lucky in that the job I have allows me to wear headphones, so I can take advantage of audiobooks. Reading shorter books and novellas also helps make that book count bigger at the end of the year and shorter formats like that can help if you feel like you're intimidated by or struggling with a longer work. At the end of 2022 my final count was 71 total books - broken down it's 36 novel-length books (ebook or physical format), 13 novellas (sub 200 pages) and 22 audiobooks.

All this is very practical but a huge part of this is like motivation, right? Part of the reason it's easy for me to make reading into a habit is I stay excited. And a big part of that is quitting.

I love quitting! I think there's no wrong reason to quit a book. It sounds counterintuitive but when I was first getting back into reading, allowing myself to seek out books that were entertaining to me and to drop books I wasn't enjoying very much was a huge factor. I'm not saying there's no reason to read challenging books or push yourself, but people read for different reasons and since I'm reading primarily for entertainment, it's nice to give myself the freedom of not having to meet some arbitrary standard for "important" work and just to read about what if a lady fell in love with her hot boss or what if there was a monster in your spaceship or whatever.

Lastly, I'm always looking for new recommendations. There's a few booktubers I like, there's some subreddits for horror and SFF I keep up with, a couple podcasts I'm into, book review websites I check in on and, of course, stuff my friends push in front of me. It's easier to stay motivated or hyped up to keep reading if you're plugging into a shared experience, right? It's fun to share in someone else's excitement!

Anyway I know that's a long, messy answer but hopefully it's thorough. If you're having a hard time bc you're not really thrilled with what you're reading, I'd try putting it aside for now and looking for something to get you really excited. If you're into it but struggling anyway, I think you could try starting small by just setting aside 30 minutes or an hour every day at the same time and reading as much as you can within that timeframe! Make it something that's just part of your day.

And as for the second question - not really. I like having music on in the background while I read, so I don't usually have songs in my head distracting me. The only thing I can't really tune out is speech - it's really hard for me to read in a room where people are talking. If you're struggling with this a lot maybe try listening to some ambient music in the background while you read? Could help with distracting your brain enough to stifle the part that wants music, but hopefully not enough to keep you from paying attention to your book. Idk. (If you want ambient suggestions I'd say The American Dollar, Rachika Nayar, Olafur Arnalds, and Helios are all good places to start)

Anyway hiiiii happy new year, I hope something nice happens to you this week 💖

#explosionreads #happy to talk books with u any time u need a rec or want to rec something to me

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thelavenderelf · 1 year

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5 Song Tag Game 🎵

I was tagged by both @bostoniangirl21 and @miraakulous-cloud-district to list five songs to fit my fic Unstable . Thank you for the tag! <3

I'm not sure who to tag, so I'm tagging anyone reading this! (just make sure to tag me if you do it though because I'm nosey and like hyping people up)

It was so hard only picking 5!! I have a pretty big playlist dedicated to Unstable.

My choices will be under the cut because of the way I formatted it!

1 : "Unstable" by Anberlin

Taught me to trust now Yet you have no faith in yourself Why can’t you believe in what you know?

The whole fic is named after this song, so of course, I had to put it in here! This song to me sums up a lot of the feelings between Sylvana and Vilkas. This song to me is all about learning to trust in one another while trusting in themselves, and that is a huge theme between the two. I also mainly hear this in Vilkas's POV. The narrator of the song is asking for this person to trust them and let them in so they can help. It just reminds me so much of when Vilkas learns that she is the Dragonborn but doesn't want to be the Dragonborn.

2: "Freakazoid" by Silversun Pickups

Once again, I believe, believe, believe That you're paranoid and I'm a freakazoid So let's wait and see

This song really fits Sylvana and how much it terrifies her to completely open up and be vulnerable. She's afraid to completely open up to Vilkas and wants to run away the moment she begins to realize she has feelings for him, but something is making her stay.

3: "Personal Jesus" by Depeche Mode

Take second best, put me to the test Things on your chest you need to confess I will deliver, you know I'm a forgiver

One of the upcoming chapters is titled "Your Own Personal Talos." Listening to this song in a sarcastic tone pretty much sums up how Sylvana feels about her position as the dragonborn. She finds it hilariously ironic that someone like her is a legendary Nord hero. It also encapsulates her feelings about Vilkas finding out that is she is the dragonborn. She's worried that he'll end up treating her differently because of it.

4: "Kanye's in My Head" by Boy Epic

Just like mama said I'm not good at making friends There I go again Should've kept my ass in bed

Mercer's in my head is more like it. Or Ulfric lol. This song really fits Sylvana's internal struggles with believing that she isn't a good person because of her past. I also love that the the lyrics mentions "mama" because oh boi is that a huge insecurity for Sylvana.

5: "Madness" by Muse

Yes I know, I can be wrong And baby, you're too headstrong Our love is Madness

This wouldn't be a proper playlist of mine if I didn't include a Muse song. This song is perfect for THE MOMENT when they realize their feelings for each other. Especially Vilkas. Like, I plan on building the friction up between these two until they can't take it anymore.

Honorable Mentions:

"IJSW" by Anberlin -- The fic was almost named after this song instead, but some friends of mine agreed that Unstable was a better fit. I think this song better suits a past relationship of Sylvana's with a certain red headed thief ;D

"Terrible Things" by Brick + Mortar -- This song perfectly fits the antagonist of Unstable who has yet to be introduced.

#tag game #oc: sylvana #fic: Unstable

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thepodcasthoard · 4 months

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How to Start a Podcast Guide for 2024: Launch, Attract 100 Listeners & Cover Costs - No Jargon! - Captivate FM

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The sixteenth article Sydney gave me is by captivate FM, which is a website that helps podcasters start and grow.

This article is extensive- there are five phases. This is going to be a long post, so buckle up.

Phase 1- Planning

1. Find your why

Once you have your why, you'll be able to figure out what you can bring to the podcasting world.

Write down your goals and set mile markers along the way to track progress towards them.

2. Topic

Choose one you're passionate about, one that excites you.

Don't feel pressured to be an absolute expert on the topic you choose- as long as you go into each episode with good research and a plan, you'll be ok.

Once you have a topic in mind, look into podcasts already in that area. What can you do differently? What will make your podcast stand out and make listeners choose yours over the however many other podcasts on the topic?

3. Name

Use research you conduct to find out keywords people are searching for that are relevant to your topic

Get creative

Descriptive name

Use your own brand if it's recognizable

Make sure it's not taken

Keep it short

Don't shove a list of keywords in. Weave them in naturally, and only keep a couple for the title. The rest can go in the description.

4. Avatar and XYZ statement

Create an avatar of your ideal listener

'I will do X for Y so Z can happen.'

Your 'Y' part will always be your listener avatar.

So the sentence will go something like 'I will do [podcast topic] for [listener] so that [listener experience].

Phase 2- Designing

5. Format

Solo, cohosted, interview are all formats of podcasts.

6. Design your flow

AKA create segments within your episode.

7. Calls to action

Anything you ask a listener to do, such as review or tell a friend, is a CTA. Decide on one or two to start with.

8. Script

This article includes examples and templates of scripts for you to use and take inspiration from.

9. Art

Keep it simple. As my old English teacher would say- KISS the work. Keep it simple, silly. The logo will be small most of the time, and you still want it to be legible and clear.

Make it relevant to the podcast.

Be bold about choices, based on what you've seen from other podcast artworks.

Don't fall back on stereotypical and overused imagery, like microphones and/or headphones.

Use your face if you're comfortable.

Remember it's not set in stone. You can always change it down the line.

There are also resources in this section to do the art yourself or outsource it, but I'll let you click through in case the author receives a commission.

10. Music

Jingles work for a reason. If you can get someone to recognize your podcast from the music alone, that's perfect.

Keep the music short. The listener wants to listen to a podcast, not a song.

There are some resources on where to find music here, and again you can find those on your own.

11. Categories and description

The description is how to draw people in, intrigue them, make them want to click and listen.

Categories are how people search through podcasts to find one to listen to. Make sure the primary category really describes the show because sometimes the two secondary categories aren't used in the algorithm.

12. Schedule and length

There's no magic answer- just think about your audience and how they might react to certain lengths, plus take into account your own time and how much you can handle.

13. Pick a launch date

Having a fixed end goal is the best way to get yourself to do this without procrastinating any more than you already have.

Phase 3- Recording

14. Microphone

It is necessary. Get one within your budget with good reviews, you can always scale up.

15. Headphones

For both recording and editing, to make sure everything is sounding good.

16. Record

This article goes over some general tips

Otherwise, the main article just talks about some differences in equipment and software if you're going solo or cohosting.

17. Editing

This goes over general tips for beginners

The main article seems to take a pretty minimalist approach- remove silences and re-takes, add music, and that's it.

The article also goes over the technical stuff related to exporting the audio file.

18. Understanding podcast hosting, RSS feeds, and directories

All I need to know is that podcasters need a hosting site to give them an RSS feed, then they can submit to directories and get heard.

Phase 4- Building

19. Trailers

This article gives you a guide on how to make one, but there are basics covered here.

Who are you and why should the listener listen to you?

What can the listener expect from the show?

How can the listener listen?

20. Choose a hosting site

Different ones will have different features, so do your research into which one will work best for you.

21. Record

Don't worry about mistakes- they can be edited out.

When you make a mistake, stop for a few seconds, then start the sentence over. You'll be able to see the silence in the wave form later.

If you wrote a script, you already know what you're going to say.

You can record in batches, which means record multiple episodes in a row.

Just because the final episode is a set time, that doesn't mean recording it will take that same amount of time. It will take you significantly longer with breaks, mistakes, and re-takes. Don't stress about it.

22. Website

Think of it as a central hub for your podcast, or a home.

You can use a website to further search engine optimization for discoverability.

It allows you to control how you show off your podcast and brand.

It also lets you build an archive of episodes, so listeners can find the earlier ones.

You'll be able to build a community around your show.

23. Social media

You don't have to worry about posting to every single social media site ever, but you should lock down the handles and usernames.

Phase 5- Launching

24. Uploading and publishing

Use your podcast host to do both.

If you choose Captivate, they have a whole instructional video of how to do this step.

25. Submit to directories

Your podcast will have generated the RSS feed you need, so you just need to plug the feed into the appropriate field.

Sometimes, your host will have a one click submission, which means you just have to click the 'submit' button and you've done it! It takes time for the directories to accept the podcast, so now you just wait. Up to a week for Apple Podcasts, specifically.

Once you've submitted to the directories, the RSS feed does the work and you won't have to do it again. The directories will just automatically get your episodes as you upload without you having to do any further steps.

26. Plan the launch

The article recommends a launch week, not day. This will give you enough time to build more excitement for your podcast. There are a few things they recommend:

Research and join three to five relevant groups or boards where your audience gathers.

Set up a podchaser profile and claim your podcast. Podchaser is like the IMDB of podcasts, so listeners can leave reviews.

Create a graphic that teaches people how to leave a review.

Get in touch with seven podcasts in your niche and ask to swap trailers. You promote theirs on yours, and they'll promote yours on theirs.

Record and release a teaser episode. Shout out listeners who left reviews, ask for feedback, thank everyone who helped you along the way, and provide listeners with a view of what's coming up.

27. Celebrate!

You've worked hard on this project, and you've finally launched. That's a huge milestone. People all over the world can now listen to you talk about your topic.

Now you can think about your growing community, develop your skills, and think about your goals.

Bonus phase- after launch

28. How to keep motivated

There's a video under this, too.

Most podcasters don't make it past ten episodes because they don't see the results they expected. You have to push through and keep going.

When a celebrity launches a podcast, it's an instant hit with tons of downloads. This is because they're already famous. Don't compare yourself to them.

Podcasters sometimes feel like no one's listening, but people are. You started a podcast because you have something important to say, so keep saying it.

Podcasting is a slow industry for non-celebrities. You have to work on bettering your skills and growing your community.

Ignore the perfectionist in your head. Nothing will ever be perfect, so stop fiddling with episodes. Stick to your release schedule you set for yourself.

Having a goal in mind helps at this point. Making your own mile markers to track your progress helps a lot, too. Make sure to celebrate victories, however small you may deem them to be.

29. Understand the data

Many beginner podcasters look at the early data and expect to see numbers in the hundreds and get discouraged when that isn't the case.

Captivate advertises that they show their users data points, including unique listeners, download averages over time, listener behavior, downloads per episode, and demographic data.

You might wonder what's a 'good' number for each of these. The truth is success is so subjective that your idea of good won't be anyone else's idea of good.

Look at your listeners and cultivate a relationship with them. Ask them to leave kind reviews and spread the word.

Celebrate any upward trend, no matter how slight.

30. How to reach one hundred listeners

Market, market, market.

Share with your core group of friends and family, they'll listen and share it with people they know that will appreciate the show.

The article also recommends treating each episode with a week of publicity. The day before you release the episode, they recommend posting short clips to tease content on your socials. On release day, create other content to share on social media. The rest of the week, use what you already created and keep posting about the episode.

Try for two to three posts per social media site, every day for the week. This might feel like too much, but social media goes so fast that things get buried. Just keep the episode in your followers' minds.

This routine will build habits and confidence, and then once the routine is set you can research more advanced ways to get more ears on your podcast.

31. Monetizing

Podcasting takes time, but you most likely invested some money into it, too, plus the upkeep if you have a paid hosting account.

Captivate offers subscriptions and tipping, but you can use other sites for the same things (patreon and ko fi come to mind).

You shouldn't feel guilty about trying to make your money back- you put a lot of time and energy into this, and some of your listeners will certainly want to help out if they can.

#podcast help #beginner podcaster

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