#i'm worried for myself

[taruruchi]

"You two are dancing in a snowglobe 'round and 'round"

i finished this within half a day. and that's not usually possible for me. kinda insane ngl

#i'm worried for myself #anyway christmas eve was pretty good :D #deli if you're reading this. this is part of what i was talking about!! #MAN I WAS PLANNING TO MAKE THE HEIGHT DIFF ACCURATE #but it's okay. at least forehead kiss height <3 #i am. not good with backgrounds. #if i look at the drawing longer i will start going crazy #so let's talk about what was going through my head #..... that exact lyric. dancing during winter #i cannot explain how much i struggled with the hands #OH WHILE THINKING OF DRAWING THIS I ALSO THOUGHT... #'AND THERE WE ARE AGAIN IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT. WE'RE DANCING ROUND THE KITCHEN IN THE REFRIGERATOR LIGHT' #not as accurate but it's still dancing yk #have you noticed that i have not rendered recently. #yeah. yeah if i rendered i'd take at least a week longer #they should ki— *gets dragged away* #the winter and holiday season is making me get too soft #too many fluffy ideas. #dude no the other day i even wrote something. it was short but i wrote!! #wait... I WROTE TWICE WHOAAA #can you tell i haven't written in a while #on an unrelated note i played christmas evel AND RIGHT WHEN IT WAS 12. FELIX SAID FELIZ NAVIDAD!!!! #i have a recording i'm so proud #anyway yeah i think that's it. ignoring some miiiinor stuff i really like this drawing #☆ taruchi's drawings 🖌 #☆ 💙 #twisted wonderland #azul ashengrotto #twst oc

[artkaninchenbau]

A h-heartfelt reunion..?

Bonus

#Sir Crocodile #Monkey D Dragon #Emporio Ivankov #Dragodile #Crocodad #My art #One Piece #We're not gonna talk about the work I should be doing rn I have Severe Procrastinitis and I'm doing my best okay #Alternative version where it was both Crocodile and Garp beating Dragon's ass before Iva-chan joined in but that was too much effort lmao #I'm a believer in Dragon being a Wind Logia so don't worry guys he is 100% taking this beating intentionally #He knows what he did and he's dealing with the concequences of his actions. With grace. #You know I realize Iva-chan should be two whole meters taller than Crocodile but we're just gonna ignore that #Look Iva-chan taking Crocodile's side and being like ''Crocoboy is right you fucked up bad Dragon'' brings me joy #And for real I've been wanting to draw this for months. But never did because I had other shit to do. Which I still do #But. You know. Sometimes you need to draw a shitpost. It's ✨ self-care ✨ #And appearently One Piece shitpost comics have become the thing I draw for myself on occassion

[rocketbirdie]

nah i don't think it was the jenova brain worms this time

#zack fair #cloud strife #ffvii #rebirth spoilers #idk i know it's just a goofy little doodle but. #i'm gonna give myself a 6 outta 10 on this one. not nearly homoerotic enough. #don't worry i'll make up for that soon! :) #my art <3

[whyoneartheven]

there are so many "if this gets (insert number) notes i'll do something productive/good for me!" but has there ever been one where someone goes

if this gets 10k notes i'll slap myself in the face

i suppose i'm wondering

would people be so eager to reblog if it would cause something slightly unpleasant?

#i'm honestly curious #i would have just made the post #but i don't want people to be worried abt me slapping myself in the face XD #evie rambles #okee dokee back to school now #help i need sleep #maybe being quarantined is making me go insane #i haven't talked to anyone outside my family for like over 2 weeks bc we've been sick #aaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh

[kerimcberry]

Spring Break 🌸✨

We're meeting Lyla's parents!! 😍

It's Sebastian's turn to meet the family. Hopefully it'll go better than Feldcroft 😅

PART 2 >>

#poor Lyla doesn't want Sebastian to be alone during Spring Break 🥺 #omg i just realized i have to draw Seb's sweater design probably like ten more times #why do i do this to myself LMAO #don't worry I'm still doing the mc art challenge! #i just missed drawing my goil 💛 #hogwarts legacy #hogwarts legacy fanart #hogwarts legacy mc #sebastian sallow #slytherin x hufflepuff #slytherpuff #sebastian sallow x mc #lyla estaris

[destinationtoast]

#fanfic #beta reading #polls #yes i am using polls to procrastinate on my wip #which is nearing completion and could use a beta reader and/or britpicker #but i'd like to post it before the start of my work trip on Monday #(and also before it gets jossed) #so I'm likely to skip it #but anyway i think i hold myself to higher standards here than others #whether or not something is beta read doesn't affect whether i read #generally #lest you worry btw #i don't take tumblr polls as strong evidence of anything #but they're entertaining and sometimes interesting #op

[gotchibam]

Commissioned piece for Gabriel!

#artists on tumblr #astarion #bg3 #bg3 astarion #gotchibam arts #commissioned piece #i'm welcoming 2024 w/ astarion art bc why not :3c #thank you for giving me the opportunity to draw him!!! 🥺🥺🥺 #as much as I wanted to draw him I was also kinda worried bc i've been getting rusty w/ anatomy #I keep thinking idk how to draw ppl anymore & then I always surprise myself lol #I guess using refs really does help :0 #also! i've tried to draw astarion so many times before but I never like how they turn out skdjhfkjshsf #this one tho..... this is an exception #this is probably the best astarion i've drawn so far ;w; #me admiring him from afar: he's so pretty. he's so pretty. he's so pretty. he's so pretty... wHY IS HE SO PRETTY

[yardsards]

hot take but you all NEED to stop telling people to kill themselves.

yes, even *those* people. i don't care if you're talking to some monster who puts live puppies into a wood chipper for fun, don't say that shit.

because mx. puppychipper isn't gonna be affected by your words.

but you know who might be affected? some innocent third party reading the words you said on a public website.

because telling people to kill themselves says "suicide is a punishment for being a bad person. bad people, upon realizing they're bad, should simply commit suicide instead of working to atone for their actions."

and that is NOT a message you wanna be normalizing to anyone, but ESPECIALLY people with depression (who, let's be real, make up a higher than average chunk of this site's userbase). whose mental illness is already telling them that 1: they're an inherently terrible worthless person no matter what they do 2: death is an appealing option.

is reading "kill yourself" once or twice gonna make them do it? nah, probably not. but reading it multiple times a day every day is gonna make their mental health worse. it's probably not good for your mental health to be saying that kind of thing, either.

just knock that shit off. the world is already so hostile to people with mental illness, and managing mental illness and unlearning unhealthy thought patterns is already so difficult. you don't need to be out here making it worse.

#eliot posts #suicide mention #animal abuse mention #i guess #ive said similar before and i just said this in the tags of another post but it deserves its own post #i am fucking TIRED of reading this shit so often #i frequently block people for saying it #sometimes i report ppl over it too if they're shitty in other ways too #i luckily don't have the ''i'm a worthless piece of shit and deserve the death penalty'' flavour of depression #but i do have the ''life is endless suffering and i want to euthanize myself'' variety of depression (or. technically bipolar.) #and reading the phrase kys Feels Bad Man w my mental illness #and i have froends w the first type and i worry about them #and one of em has told me it does affect them quite negatively to read kys #so yeah! fucking stop it!

[koinotame]

quick apology fic to xiao for missing his bday </3 which doubles as a character study of xiao and an exploration of how you as the player interact with the self aware characters in self aware au

it’s been a couple of weeks since you last used him.

or has it only been several days? whether it’s days or years, it all feels like the blink of an eye to him. the flow of time is somewhat of a nebulous concept for someone like him, especially since you first appeared.

it doesn’t matter. however long you take to come back, xiao will wait dutifully for you.

he spends most of his time when you’re not making use of him subjugating threats around liyue and fighting off any unwanted foes. perhaps you’ll come back faster if the area is freer of enemies. you’re kind, after all. you seem much happier when it’s peaceful.

lately, when there’s no demons for him to quell, he’s found himself returning to the same spot on wangshu inn’s upper balcony. it’s the spot you always drop him off at before disappearing. it’s not the place at the top of the inn’s roof he’d pick on his own, though you do sometimes take him up there as well.

you’re not actually there, but if he closes his eyes it almost feels like you are.

his birthday was a couple days ago. as usual, the traveller had suggested he write you a letter. as usual, he wasn’t sure what he could possibly convey to you that you would be happy to receive.

the traveller insisted anything from him would make you happy, but xiao doubts that.

it’s easier when you’re here. it’s easier when you’re here and he can submit himself entirely to you and doesn’t have to think for himself.

he’s been dreaming more lately, particularly of you. he doesn’t know what you look like, and after he wakes up he can never quite remember what you looked like in his dreams.

waking up after dreaming of you is always hard for xiao. it’s shameful how badly he wants to go back to dreaming of doing such mundane things with you, and it’s disgraceful how long it takes him to pick himself back up afterwards.

he wonders if you’d like doing dull things like that with someone like him.

he wonders if he deserves that.

probably not.

he left the letter at the railing of that same—your—spot, along with a serving of his almond tofu (he might not like dreaming, but he hopes your dreams are as sweet as his have been lately), some dream solvent (the traveller had mentioned you seemed to want more) and a small bundle of qixing (you frequently go out of your way to collect it).

you never touch it.

…after a couple days, he decided to move the offering to his room. it stays there, on his windowsill where the sun touches it in a way that reminds him of your warmth, untouched.

it doesn’t matter, he tells himself. he’ll wait for you for as long as you want. even if another thousand years pass before you appear again, he’ll continue his duty and wait.

and then he blinks and suddenly finds himself in front of the adventurer’s guild in the court of fontaine.

another blink and he’s back at wangshu inn, this time heading towards the kitchen. the familiar aura of your possession fills him with a warmth he doesn’t think exists outside of you. he zones out for what feels no longer than a couple seconds, and suddenly there’s thirty servings of almond tofu in front of him.

your mood drops.

dissatisfaction seeps through you and into him. something deep in his gut squirms.

you set a large amount of sweet flowers to boil, then seem to fuss with something he can’t quite see or grasp. smiley yanxiao gives him a curious look, but doesn’t (cannot) comment any further.

in another couple of seconds—your teleportation hardly fazed him when you first started using him, let alone now when he’s so used to your presence—he’s in front of the liyuean general goods store. you buy up the entire stock of milk, and only milk.

your mood hasn’t improved. if anything, you seem even more downcast.

the milk dissipates as soon as it’s been bought, safely held in your near infinite storage.

he’s behind mondstadt’s hotel next, jumping down the railing and towards the local general goods store. again, you buy up all the milk. next you head for the good hunter (is that what it’s called? he thinks that’s what the traveller called it some time ago) and purchase as much of their sugar as you can.

tendrils of something truly unpleasant move upwards and wrap around his neck.

he finds himself in wangshu inn’s kitchen again. barely any of the sweet flowers have been processed, but you take the two packs of sugar anyway. you put him to work immediately.

usually, he finds the process of cooking much to tedious and drawn out. with you, he doesn’t mind.

you seem a bit more satisfied this time, and xiao finds himself ashamed of having made a few more of his specialty dish instead of only regular almond tofu like you’d wanted him to.

while you seem a bit happier now, he still finds himself in front of inazuma’s goods store. again, you buy all the milk. you talk to the restaurant owner up the stairs afterwards. some confusion creeps into him through you, but it doesn’t last long.

he’s in sumeru next. more milk makes its way into your inventory, and you visit the local tavern for good measure, though this time you don’t buy anything at all.

exiting the building, you seem to notice there’s a stove just outside of it and walk over in excitement… and straight into the clay oven.

a sharp pang of panic shoots through him and he jerks backwards. it takes him a second to realise it’s your panic.

immediately, you pull the astrologer from mondstadt out and have her set down her little hydro puppet. you then walk him through it, which does absolutely nothing except soak his clothes.

your panic doesn’t subside.

i’m sorry.

he blinks and finds himself in front of dihua marsh’s statue of the seven, the fire and the tinge it brought with it disappearing in seconds.

it’s rare to be able to make out what you’re actually saying as opposed to just feeling your vague emotions and intentions. are you that worried about him not performing up to standard with this little damage?

he’s yours to use. a little singe like that would never hold him back.

you don’t bother with fontaine.

something like shame curls up his body and makes a home near his ears.

soon after, he’s back at the inn’s kitchen again. yanxiao doesn’t even look in his direction this time as he gets back to work under your guidance, making even more almond tofu. he makes sure to take greater care to avoid displeasing you again.

your mood doesn’t pick up this time, but you seem to have calmed down a little. he’s not sure why (or what use you could possibly have for so much almond tofu), but it’s a small comfort.

part of him wishes he could be there with you properly to comfort you, but he knows better.

he might be your formidable weapon, but that’s all he is. he has no false illusions about his role or purpose to you, no matter how much he wishes he could be the one you turn to for comfort. he isn’t suited to something so delicate. he’s accepted that a long time ago.

your dejection doesn’t retract, even as you move him around a bit more.

then you sit him down at a table at the inn’s terrace and pull out a plate of his specialty.

your presence lingers for a bit, envelops him like a gentle dream, then falls through the cracks of his existence and disappears.

happy birthday, xiao.

he wonders if he deserves this much effort from you for something as inconsequential as his birthday.

probably not.

he hopes he’ll dream of this next.

#yandere #yandere x reader #x reader #genshin impact #yandere genshin impact #self aware au #self aware genshin #sagau #xiao #'character study' i say and then worry this is perhaps too ooc #i mean. ultimately. self aware and/or yan characters are going to be a bit ooc. but like within the realm of that #this isn't super yandere but you know. tags there just in case #writing the base of this took like an hour max. editing it took me like three lol #i do think i'm actually fairly happy with the end result though for once so yay #<- jinxing myself here

[canisalbus]

Hello, i joined Tumblr recently and you were one of the suggested subscribers and I absolutely fell in love with your style and your characters! so here, have a lil' Machete (๑˃ᴗ˂)ﻭ

also, sorry for the bad english, i am french oui oui baguette

.

#aaaaaa #he looks adorable in your style #in a sort of ill-fated praying mantis way #which is appropriate and correct #so tiny yet so haunted #loving the daggers and the blood and the darker shading across his face it adds a lot of drama #and the teensy cross that's precious #thank you for drawing him! #bubuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu #gift art #Machete #own characters #I'm glad you like my stuff! delighted to hear you chose to follow and welcome to tumblr I hope you'll have good time here #your english is fine don't worry #I'm finnish myself sauna terva perkele

[personishfive]

in which: april 1st special

#my art #comics #p5 #goro akechi #i hate drawing myself but anything for the bit #inspired of course by classic april fools askblog special events lol #i'm not gonna make a big fuss but if you send in an ask for a limited time it'll come with an akechi doodle gomic. #you know. in the spirit of things #it's not april 1st quite yet where i am. but don't worry about these things <3 #i'll just rb this again tmrw i guess lolol #april fools 2024

[finntheehumaneater]

thinking about Eddie, who because of the upsidedown was in a coma for effectively the rest of '86. When he woke up he had to re-learn a lot of shit, since even after he could open his eyes and sit up, moving was still hard.

Steve and Robin go with him to all of his PT appointments as he works on moving and standing up, but not walking yet. The therapist overhears him complaining to Steve about how he misses writing, since his hands are too shaky for the words to be legible.

She tells him that if he wants to write better he should practice more, and maybe pick something else up that requires small, repetitive movements, like sewing or crocheting.

Eddie is about to open his mouth to say that sewing might be a good idea, because he can work on putting his old patches onto the new vest that the kids bought him as a "we're glad you're not dead present", when Robin comes back from the bathroom and pipes up that she has some crocheting stuff from when she and Steve tried to learn together a few years back, and that's the end of that conversation.

crocheting is his least favorite part of the night, even if Robin and Steve are patient and let him pick the movie in the background and don't get frustrated when he drops the hook between the couch cushions for the thirtieth time in an hour.

Eventually he gets the hang of it, but--out of spite--refuses to make anything other than a very long line with his yarn, telling Steve and Robin he's going to strangle them with it when he's done, because crocheting "is literally the least metal thing in the world."

He stops threatening to strangle Robin after she makes him a little bat.

#i saw a girl at my PT appointment who got recommended this and she looked mortified #but her bf got so excited and went “fuck yeah babe i'm gonna make you SO MUCH STUFF!” #it was adorable #Steddie #Steve Harrington #Eddie Munson #Robin Buckley #Stobin #i just think that robin and eddie would be best friends #i'm crocheting myself a blanket it's taking forever and i hate it but i do it when i watch movies because i don't have to worry about #what to do with my hands #Steddie drabbles #might write this one day #or someone else could take inspo and save me the trouble i dunno how tf i would describe how you crochet #my post #stranger things #steve x eddie #finn writes

[figmentof]

THE LAST OF US 1x01  || 1x07

#The Last of Us #tlouedit #hbotlouedit #thelastofusedit #thelastofushboedit #tloudaily #hbotlou #tlounetwork #figmentofedit #i'm punching myself in the face for this set don't worry 🙃 #1k

[uncanny-tranny]

I've talked before about how the way people treat suicide can be unintentionally devastating to the suicidal person, but I don't think I really ever said how to avoid that.

Speaking about suicide in how selfish it "is" ("think about how you'll transfer your pain to your loved ones!") might seem like a way to put logical sense into the suicidal person, but, honestly? It runs the risk of massively increasing their shame and guilt about being suicidal. Suicide is not inherently a revenge fantasy or a way to "get back" at someone's loved ones, so when the suicidal person is treated like a criminal of a "crime" they haven't even committed yet, you can imagine how unhelpful that can become.

Instead, if you want to point out how cherished your person is, frame their relationships as something they can keep fostering.

"Your cat will miss you :(!!!!" becomes "you and your cat seem close, right? I'm sure it's beautiful having a close friend like that!" and maybe include ways that they and their cat are close and meaningful to each other, tailored to that relationship.

That's only one example, but when you shift the focus away from why that person should repent and feel guilty for being suicidal, you can instead focus on why they would live for that reason. See how you can frame that as a positive? Whatever is keeping that person tethered should never be used as a bludgeon, I think, because then you're taking away why they're living, the positivity of why they are here. Whatever they are here for should be remembered often and honoured.

#mental health #mental health advocacy #mental health support #suicide #suicide tw #(after this i'm going to rant about being told the unhelpful narrative i included above) #when i was younger the thing i was told the most was that suicide would only transfer my pain to others... #...and is that true? maybe. was it helpful? no. #why was that unhelpful? #because i started using that as yet ANOTHER reason to feel guilty and to lash out against myself... #...because that didn't magic away my suicidality like it 'should have'... #...and that was ~obvious~ proof i didn't care enough about my loved ones to keep them out of harms way... #...and it can be really hard not to do that (give advice like that) because if you're not the suocidal person... #...you have the luxury of thinking without the burden they are labouring under... #...you can see 'logically' and make assumptions about what the other person 'needs' #it's just frustrating because i know that people like this want to help but i worry about *how* they are helping... #...in the sense that i want their efforts to actually help their person and bring them closer

[avelera]

Dream of the Endless does dumb stuff in my fics. Sometimes people point out that he does dumb stuff in my fics. Sometimes I get a little self-conscious about it, because I worry that they think he's OOC or should have acted differently, which is ultimately on me as the writer.

Then I remember that Dream is canonically a moron. Literally. Stated in the text, he's an idiot.

Lucienne's body language is clear. Unity is right but she's too loyal/diplomatic to agree with her aloud.

I could turn this into an entire essay of images and quotes from the comic and show of Dream doing dumb shit, like calling on the Fates before seeking help literally anywhere else. Or how Destruction points out that Dream just deliberately forgets anything that doesn't hold his interest or (implied by extension) agree with his worldview.

Everyone with any brains in "The Sandman" agrees that Dream is very dramatic and very pretty (thanks, Hob) and not the least bit intelligent.

This fact gives me great delight.

And so I shall continue to adhere as close to canon as possible, and continue to make Dream the fucking moron that he truly is. Bless.

#the sandman #dream of the endless #this is mostly tongue in cheek I'm not actually worried about commenters #if anything though I sometimes have to remind myself to make him dumber and his reasoning less rational #1589 fic

[obiwan]

#manipulate, manslaughter, malewife

#harry styles #hstylesgif #don't worry darling #film #okay i'm done i'll see myself out thank u all #gif