#i wouldn’t eat a taco but i would eat the meat and cheese and tortilla all separate | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

abiteofnat · 3 years

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If you’re reading this, I’m coming back to Chicago, beetch

The non-existent rumors are true. After a brief 10-month exit from the city to soak up the fresh air and social distance-friendly suburbs, I am now returning to Chicago as a single, slightly more anxious version of myself. While I’m still trying to kick some of the anxiety and OCD that COVID-19 pushed from “lifelong tagalongs” to “all-controlling demons”, I feel 97% ready to be back where I feel most myself, and cannot wait to welcome that change. While that 3% still makes me a little uncomfy and hesitant, I’m a believer in pushing your boundaries to allow yourself to grow, and also, I am really sick of suburbs food.

Ha! I joke. I wouldn’t move downtown simply for access to more diverse & higher quality food... or would I? All I know is while there are plenty of gems in the North Shore, I’ve eaten take out from all of them ten times over, and I did not foster my dislike of cooking out of nowhere. My parents do not enjoy cooking, my sister pretends to enjoy cooking, and I will cook if it is 5 ingredients or less. My latest speciality is a toasted bagel with butter, hummus, and EBTB seasoning. Voila. So when it comes to dinner, we are living off of a carousel of suburban favorites, and are losing steam as we are still not comfortable with dining inside (or dining inside in the city, where the fun food is).

All of this to say, it’s exciting to imagine what life is going to be like in a few short weeks. While I’m still extra precautionary, I can’t wait to have my own space downtown, where I can enjoy coffee on my little balcony (!!!) and dream of the days friends can come squeeze into my studio safely while I lay out an entire table of sharable spreads and snacks from Ema (Charred Eggplant Spread is the best one, don’t fight me).

So you may ask, how did you come to this decision to move to the heart of downtown out of seemingly nowhere, you hermit?

It starts with my mom and I having a brief, simultaneous breakdown and coming to the conclusion that we would both feel comfortable doing a staycation downtown, as long as we wore masks, sanitized always, and braved the cold to eat outside. This was big for me! As a person with real OCD, not cute TV show “I have to keep my pens straight” OCD, this would be the most exposure I’d had to a lot of uncontrollable variables since the pandemic started. If you’re thinking, “you get to spend a weekend downtown in a hotel with your mom, shut up”, know that I hear you. I am unbelievably grateful that I’ve gotten this time with my parents, and that we can do a staycation. However, having anxiety comes at a cost, and that cost is blowing everything way the fuck out of proportion instead of being able to rationalize it sometimes. Let’s! Normalize! Having! This! Discussion!

So, we went downtown in early March for a two-night stay, and oh my goodness. The realization that we got to be in a different space, and do different things, and eat different food for a weekend made it feel like a legit vacation, and not like we drove 30 minutes to get there. The view from our room was of Michigan Ave, and hearing the traffic and seeing the people out and about instantly made me feel a sense of peace I wasn’t expecting. I’ve lived downtown for 6 years, but it always shocks me how much the city feels like an extension of me once I’m in it after being away. My mom and I went out for a walk (gentle yet forceful reminder to please wear a mask), then decided to grab dinner while we were out. The plan was to bring it back to the room, but there was a warm spell, and there just happened to be a table for two at Topolobampo on Clark, and suddenly we were sitting on the patio under the lights eating masa quesadillas dipped in a spicy salsa verde. It just happened!!!

Before getting downtown, I was tentatively looking at apartments for the spring. I was looking at Lincoln Park, Old Town, maybe Lakeview, and came across a listing in the Gold Cost that caught my eye. That one was swiped out from under me within days, but I couldn’t stop thinking about the area. Then I discovered another unit that was available, and couldn’t shake it from my mind. Over mushroom tacos I discussed it with my mom, and we decided to go see it. Totally not what I had been planning for in terms of location, but why not?

Once we polished off breakfast the next morning (Eggs Benedict with fried eggs, extra hollandaise) we headed out to see the place. Let me say I have never seen my mom fall in love with a single apartment I’ve lived in, and she was ALL. FOR. IT. Unreal reaction on her part. Once I saw the west-facing views and the incredible natural lighting, I was 100% in as well.

We spent the rest of the weekend wandering the downtown area, enjoying another dinner outside at The Gwen and my mom’s first visit to the Starbucks Reserve Roastery, which was 95% more empty than I’ve ever seen it given we went in a pandemic at 8:30PM. Shit on Starbucks all you want, but that Roastery is an incredible use of space (in non-pandemic times) and the coffee & Princi pastries are really, really good.

When we got back home feeling refreshed and like we had actually gone on a vacation, I jumped into apartment shark mode real fast and signed as many documents as the very kind realtor could send over. One week later, whabaam, I was a Gold Coast girl. Ahem, *lady*. What better way to celebrate than going to Somerset and having the Rapini & Roasted Garlic Flatbread and Wild Mushroom Risotto? No clue. As I sat outside, yet again with my mom, I felt a wave of excitement come over me and realized, this is it. This is the sign and feeling I’ve been waiting for, telling me it’s time to move back to the city and start over. The creamy, herbacious risotto also helped solidify that.

SO. After all of that, the news is I’m moving, and you’re probably wondering why I shared all of this on a blog about food. I meant for this post to be about everywhere I ate during my staycation, but realized quickly we ate at some very basic places - DELICIOUS, but still basic. Oops. Below are all the dishes I had and a rundown of the flavors, textures, etc., however don’t expect to find any new, revolutionary restaurants. Sorry!

1. Topolobampo

This Rick Bayless restaurant has been around forever, and unfortunately, you can tell by the interior. We’ve eaten here as a family a couple of times before, but never had a noteworthy experience. I can confirm that in a pinch, the patio covered in fun lights & mini piñatas, and the sharable, filling bites will do just fine. This was my first time going to a Mexican restaurant as a non-alcohol drinker, and instead of my typical mezcal margarita, I opted for a Fresh Limeaide which was refreshing and flavorful. We split the Guacamole and Chips, which if you’ve ever stopped at the Frontera in O’Hare, you know is good as fuck. It’s smooth, creamy, tangy, and topped with chopped onions and cilantro for a little crunch. It’s not the most life-changing, but it is consistently satisfying. Next, we got the Mushroom Tacos and Masa Quesadillas. The Masa Quesadillas were a fun surprise, as instead of a tortilla, the masa is what makes up the outside. They are almost like empanadas and stuffed with gooey, melty cheese, and come with a spicy salsa verde on the side. I would come back for these alone - they’re rich yet light, warm, and comforting, all the things you would want when dining outside when it’s still a little chilly. The Mushroom Tacos were quite frankly unreal, because whatever they seasoned the mushroom slices with and grilled them on made them taste unlike any mushroom I’ve had before. There was definitely some meat crossover on the grill, so don’t order those if you’re vegan, or ask them to prepare the mushroom separately. I however was LOSING MY MIND. Over mushrooms. The joys of being vegetarian!

2. The Gwen

On a happening Saturday night in Chicago, Upstairs at The Gwen is sure to be a packed scene. Located in River North, this hotel bar/restaurant offers a somehow cozy rooftop filled with loungey couches, fire pits, and ambient lighting, even though you’re surrounded by apartments and skyscrapers and there is nothing “cozy” about River North. Every table was filled, yet since you’re outside and it’s fairy spread apart, it still felt safe. I got my new classic, a Lemonade, and we got the Burrata to start. With sourdough, roasted beets, squash, pomegranate, pistachio, & arugula, this plate was nothing short of mouth-watering. It has textures! It has flavors! It has pomegranate seeds, the TikTok must have of the moment! The bread was 10/10, the burrata was 8/10, and all of the toppings made for a very find bite of salad on their own. For my main I got the Lobster Fettucine, a beautiful bowl of “charcoal fettuccine with saffron-tomato sauce, lobster, calabrian chili butter, and basil-brioche crumbs” as listed on their website. Take any of those ingredients and it’s going to be delicious, but all of them TOGETHER? INCREDIBLE. The chunks of lobster were huge, absolutely making the dish worth its price tag, and the sauce was flavorful, unique, and unlike any sauce I’ve tasted in the last few years. It’s typical to do a squid ink pasta with seafood and tomato sauce, but the saffron added a new element I very much appreciated.

3. The Starbucks Roastery

I KNOW. THIS IS A TOURIST DESTINATION. All I am saying is if there’s no line, go get an iced latte with two packets of sugar in the raw. That’s all. It’s really good after something like, I don’t know, Lobster Fettucine.

4. The Penninsula

You cannot go wrong with hitting up The Penninsula for breakfast or brunch, especially if you are staying there and have the option to do room service. Typically we would go to Pierrot Gourmet, the cafe in the ground floor of The Penninsula, however it has been closed temporarily. If there’s one thing to order with your breakfast, it’s the smashed fingerling potatoes. Delish.

5. Somerset

Somerset is becoming a quick go-to of mine for an impromptu dinner downtown, given it’s in the heart of Gold Coast and is cute if you’re sitting indoors or outdoors. The food is nothing too innovative, but it is done well, which is the most important part with “cuter” restaurants that may focus on the Instagram appeal over the food sometimes. Each time I’ve gone I’ve gotten the seasonal flatbread and a pasta or risotto, usually something with mushrooms, and it’s always been plate-licking good. To drink, I got -you guessed it- a Lemonade! For dinner I went with the Wild Mushroom Risotto which was everything you could hope for in a risotto, topped with olive oil, herbs, and local parmesan. We split the Rapini & Roasted Garlic Flatbread which was as it sounds, flatbread covered in rapini, garlic, and ricotta, which added a nice crunch and had enough rapini to feel like it was replacing a boring vegetable side dish or salad. The patio vibes were wonderful, the judgemental girls in the greenhouses looked like they were having a good time, and our waiter couldn’t have been sweeter. I will be going back to try the Fontina Arancini, which I just noticed on the menu. FRICK.

So there you have it, a very long-winded explanation of the last few weeks of my life and where you can find me on a staycation in Chicago. Hopefully once I move back to the city I’ll have endless new spots to try and won’t be basic anymore!

Until next time, Happy Eating!

-Natalie

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lonelyreputation · 4 years

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Different (part one)

A/N: Unrequited love! Unrequited love!! UNREQUITED LOVE!!! AHHH!!!

Okay here is the unrequited love that you’ve all been patiently waiting for!! Thanks for that! So I combined two requests together for an overarching theme and will circle back to those a few times during this mini-series!! As always, let me know what you guys thought of it!! I love hearing every detail of your thoughts!!

THANKS A MILLION for all of your support! Reblogs are never expected, but always appreciated!! 🤗💞🌻

REQUEST/PROMPT: People talking a room away & Fighting the urge to cry

Let’s Chat!! | MASTERLIST

Warnings: Few swear words, some self-doubt, and ANGST!!!

Word Count: 4.3K

You’ve found yourself in this position before: lounging on Shawn’s patio couch on a warm summer’s night, the lights of the CN Tower illuminating the bustling city streets below, nestled into Shawn with your head resting on his chest, arm lazily draped around your shoulder.

The fire pit in front of you was giving off heat, but it was nothing like the warmth you felt in Shawn’s arms. His arms, always tightly wound around you, felt like they were protecting you from anything on the outside. And at times, you even felt as if they protected you from your own dismissive thoughts.

Brian was telling a story, one that you had heard before, but since it was one of Shawn’s first night’s back from touring, he was telling it as if no one had heard it. But you didn’t mind tuning out his voice, it gave you an excuse to give all of your attention to Shawn.

He was gone for so long. Seeing his face through your iPhone wasn’t enough to ease the ache of your heart. Whenever he laughed on screen you yearned to hear his laugh in person, and now you were granted with the pleasure of hearing it and feeling it rumble through his chest.

Shawn’s fingertips lazily grazed your shoulder blades, sending electric jolts all the way down to the tip of your toes.

“So, Shawn,” Brian let out a little laugh, taking a sip of his beer, as he gave Shawn a pointed look, “Any girls on tour?”

Shawn’s fingertips paused their languid movements and you felt your breath hitch in your throat.

“Got my girl right here,” he squeezed your shoulder and pressed a kiss to the top of your head. The familiar tickling sensation inside your stomach caused the corners of your lips to lift up in a small smile.

Brian let out another laugh, “Dude, c’mon, I’m not talking about your best friend––It’s just us,” he waved his hand around to gesture at the three of you sitting around the fire, “Secrets are safe here.”

The longer Shawn stayed silent, the further you felt your heart drop in your stomach. Was there another girl? If there was, he made no mention of it to you on your every other nightly FaceTime calls. The rational side of your brain was having a lethal fight with the irrational part.

He tells you everything, the rational part of your brain concluded, you would know if there was a girl.

But, the irrational section of your mind weighed in, he’s a young, single and very good looking guy there’s no way he went on tour and didn’t meet an equally beautiful girl.

A girl more beautiful than you.

It was times like this where your insecurities were too much to handle. Your own thoughts maliciously attacking you. It was times like these where Shawn’s tight hold on you was all you needed to feel safe from yourself.

“Swear on it man,” Shawn raised both of his hands up in surrender, briefly losing contact with your shoulder. He leaned his body toward the table, and since your head was still resting on his chest, he took you with him, as he grabbed his glass of alcohol and took a sip, “No one for me.”

Brian didn’t look convinced, but you were more than happy when he dropped the topic and changed the conversation. But with the way Brian kept glancing at the both of you cuddled up on the couch, you wondered if there was something you should be aware of.

•••

The next night you were over at Shawn’s it was just the two of you. It was a tradition to get together within the first five days of him returning from tour and having a night reserved for just spending time together; it was always a movie night with tacos.

You brought all the ingredients over; spices, tortillas, condiments, and meat. While Shawn provided the cooking equipment and his company. You were never too fond of tacos, but when Shawn had returned home from touring his Handwritten album and crashed at your house, all he wanted to eat were tacos. You remembered how excited he was to make the tacos, catch up with you––his best friend––after months of being away, and picking out the perfect movie to watch.

His idea of a perfect movie was 10 Things I Hate About You and he fell asleep halfway through it.

So, within five days of returning from a tour, without fail, you and Shawn always ate tacos and watched 10 Things I Hate About You.

That’s exactly where you found yourself now.

Shawn had a fairly large kitchen, definitely bigger than the one in your apartment, and you cooked with a smile on your face with all the space you had to move around. You chopped up the lettuce while Shawn took out a frying pan.

“Did you mix the spices together?” You called out over your shoulder.

You heard your answer when Shawn let out a deep sigh, “No,” Turning your head around you saw him holding the frying pan limply in his hands as he looked at you with hopeful eyes, “Can you mix them?”

Placing the knife down on the cutting board, you walked over to him with a smile, “It’s not that hard.”

Another sigh, “But you have to measure them and there’s a million fucking little spices––“

“Hey,” you placed a hand on his bicep and gave it a slight squeeze, “Don’t worry, I got it.”

When your hand touched his arm, all you felt was warmth. Shawn was an abnormally warm person, but this kind of warmth was felt deeper within. The warmth you felt whenever your skin touched his reminded you of home. His presence was so caring and thoughtful that his whole body seemed to radiate that warmth. And you would do anything in the world to savor that feeling for the rest of our life.

His eyes flickered down to where you held your hand as a shy smile lit up on his face, “I love you.”

I love you.

It wasn’t an uncommon phrase said in your friendship. You both had said it countless times to each other before disconnecting your long distance phone calls, sent voice notes of the phrases to each other, and said it a million more times face to face when you were finally reunited.

But he didn’t mean those three words in the way you wanted to hear them.

You mixed the spices and Shawn took over your role of cutting up the vegetable toppings as your teasing drowned out the music in the background. Cooking was something that was enjoyable and relaxing, but with Shawn, it brought a whole new layer of excitement. You would smack his hand away from eating the cheese, scold him for touching the hot pan, and he would always give your hips a light squeeze whenever he walked behind you.

Once Shawn had cooked the meat and you set up everything in a buffet style, you two had taken to sitting on the barstools instead of at the kitchen table. He was typing something on his phone with a smile on his face when you sat down next to him and asked what it was about. He quickly locked his phone and placed it face down on the counter, looking at you with the same smile he had while looking at his phone. Don’t need to worry about it now, he said, I’m with you.

It was silent as you both started eating the meal you prepared together.

“I–ve––Ote––A––Ong,” Shawn spoke with his mouthful as he went to go in for another bite of his taco. You tilted your head and raised your eyebrows, telling him you understood nothing of what he had just said.

He held up a finger as he finished chewing, and after he swallowed his food he said, “I wrote a song.”

You rolled your eyes, “That’s what you get paid for, no?”

Shawn took another bite of his taco and slightly pushed your shoulder. And with the skin to skin contact, you tried to bottle up that warmth that made your stomach do summersaults.

“I mean like,” he was thinking; eyebrows tightly pulled together as he bit the inside of his cheek trying to find the right words to say, “A song song,” your eyebrows continued to stay raised, having no idea what he was alluding to, “Let me just,” he fumbled with his phone that was sitting on the kitchen counter top, “Play it for you.”

The music he was playing from his iPhone throughout the speakers in his apartment cut off as a melody of guitar strings plucking together filled the room. Shawn’s eyes were trained on the stings of his hoodie, avoiding your curious stare.

Twenty-five seconds in, the voice of the boy sitting across from you––the voice that you loved hearing ramble on about nothing in particular––started to sing.

You could be in Toronto, and I can be in L.A.

Your mind flooded with memories of Shawn always jetting off to L.A., while you were stuck in Toronto always patiently awaiting his return. He’s been on more flights to Los Angeles than you had been on flights in your entire life. And it never got easier driving him to the airport and squeezing him extra tight praying he would change his mind and stay in Toronto.

And if twenty years went by without you, I’d know our feelings wouldn’t change.

Your heart leaped in your chest, feeling as airy and happy as the guitar melody sounded when the chorus of the song came around. You’ve always wanted to bottle up the warmth Shawn held, but this feeling was better. This feeling of pure bliss––like everything in the universe was aligning just for you––made your toes tingle and the hair on your skin stick up.

You barely registered the lyrics in the second verse as you stared at Shawn with eyes wide in astonishment. His way with words blew you away. From the kid who was so nervous to pick up the pen on his first album to now not being able to put the pen down…He absolutely amazed you.

We’ve got that we don’t have to talk to know this love will never stop.

There weren’t many dry spells of conversation with your friendship with Shawn. You could count on one hand when the two of you were too busy to talk to each other, but whenever the two of you would pick up your conversations, it was like no time had passed.

Oh, we’ve got it.

He looked up, staring into your eyes. You thought you were seeing the same different kind of love in his eyes that you’ve been holding in yours for too long now.

Oh, we’ve got that different kind of love.

•••

It wasn’t unusual for Shawn’s lavish Toronto apartment to be the place for parties. Even when he was away on tour, Brian still managed to either sneak in with a few friends or have a full on party. And where you found yourself now––politely saying excuse me while trying to slide behind two people to get to the kitchen––it was one of those full blown parties thrown by Brian for Shawn.

It took a bit of convincing, but Brian wanted to really celebrate his best friend’s return after a successful leg of his tour. His apartment wasn’t packed, per se, but everyone seemed to be congregating in his living room area.

The music could barely be heard over the hoots and hollers of the guests, there were a few sticky spots on the ground where your shoes stuck (you made a mental note to clean it up in the morning), and nobody seemed to understand the concept of personal space.

You finally escaped into the kitchen where people only came in for a second to make another drink and then went back out to join the party. You broke the status quo by leaving the party in the living room for the tameness of the kitchen. The air felt cooler around you, not being pressed up against so many bodies, and you took a deep breath.

“There you are,” your ears perked up at the familiar voice, “Was looking for you.”

You didn’t even have to turn your head to know who was talking. All you had to do was listen to the increased beat of your heart in your chest. His arm curled around your stomach as he pulled your back into his chest. The warmth you felt was in overload.

Shawn pressed a quick kiss to the top of your head, “You weren’t gonna leave, were you?”

You shook your head, grateful that he wasn’t able to see the blush on your cheeks, “Leave a Shawn Mendes party early?” You let out a small laugh that you hoped covered up your nervousness, “Never.”

Shawn let out a boisterous laugh as he spun you around, out of his grasp. Your back was now pressed against the cool kitchen countertop you had made tacos on a few days prior. The hand he had gently placed on your hips was getting all of your attention.

“Good,” he whispered, “Don’t know what I would do if you left.” He pressed a quick kiss to your cheek, “Brian doesn’t know how to handle his alcohol.”

You wanted to let out a loud laugh, but he was so close, if you moved your head just an inch forward your noses would brush up against each other, and you didn’t want to scare him away.

“Lucky me,” you contained your laugh into a wide smile, “To play the responsible adult.”

Shawn moved his face the inch closer to yours. You didn’t know what to do as the tip of his nose slightly brushed against yours. There had been a few drunk kisses shared between the two of you, but you were sober and so was Shawn. At least he seemed sober in your eyes when he whispered the next words with a bit of edge to them.

“Lucky me.”

Your eyes stayed wide open as his fluttered shut for only a second before someone yelled out his name. And that someone was Brian.

You stayed pressed up against the counter, eyes wide open as you stared over Shawn’s shoulder to see Brian looking at you with the exact same facial expression; confused, but not all that surprised at how you found yourself pressed between Shawn and the counter. While you were starting to feel unease from the situation, Shawn stayed firm in his place, his hand was now rubbing soft circles into your side.

“Hey, Uh––“ It was the first time you had heard Brian speechless, “Cleaning supplies? Tyler just–––“

Shawn let his head drop to your shoulders, “Fuck,” he whispered only loud enough for you to hear, already knowing what Brian’s sentence was leading to. His breath was hot against your neck, causing your own breath to just stop. And just like how fast his eyes closed in front of you, Shawn let go of your waist and walked out of the kitchen with Brian trailing behind him.

You stayed in that position for five minutes staring blankly at the wall across the way, still not believing what you thought was about to happen.

“Y/n?” Snapping back into reality, you saw your friend Olivia mixing herself a drink with a look of concern on her face, “Good?

Your mouth went dry as you tried to string together your thoughts, “I––Yeah there’s––Why wouldn’t I––“

“I saw you with Shawn.”

Her blunt words cut you off. You didn’t think anyone, save for Brian, had caught you in that compromising position with Shawn. But it wasn’t like you and Shawn were an item. You weren’t anything but friends. Best friends.

You tried to wave her off as you joined her to make your own mixed drink, telling a little white lie, “He’s an affectionate drunk,” the coldness of the glass wrapped inside of your hand served as a wake up call.

Olivia gave you a pointed look as she took a sip of her drink, “Y/n, you should tell him.”

You pretended like you didn’t hear her as you continued taking sips of your drink. Olivia was a good friend of yours, and it was on your second bottle of shared wine after a much too stressful exam season, that you let it slip that you were in love with your best friend.

You set your near empty glass on the counter, “I can’t–––He doesn’t feel the same way.”

Olivia raised her eyebrows, she didn’t believe you, and neither did you for a minute. In that moment Shawn had you pressed against the counter, you believed that maybe he did feel the same way about you. But he was so quick to remove himself from you that it diminished any hope you had.

“He was all over you,” she smirked, “Got some heads to turn into the kitchen.”

You blushed at the thought of anymore people intruding on your little moment with Shawn, “He has been acting a little differently since he’s gotten back,” you tried to rationalize with yourself, “Maybe he…does?”

There was skepticism in your voice, mixed with a little bit of hope, like the vodka coke you had in your hand.

“Go,” Olivia offered you a reassuring smile as she nodded her head in the direction Brian and Shawn walked off to, “Tell him.”

With a single nod, you downed the rest of your drink, but kept the glass in your hands. You needed something to keep your hands steady and in place or you would be more of a nervous wreck than you already were.

Confessing to your best friend that you love him? The irrational part of your brain spoke up, you know he doesn’t feel the same so save yourself the heartbreak–––

But, the rational part of your mind interrupted, he is your best friend, you should be able to trust him with anything, and if for some reason he doesn’t love you back it shouldn’t change your friendship.

You fought to silence both parts of your brain, neither of them helping your confidence right now, as you walked down the hall to where you knew Shawn and Brian were. He always kept his cleaning supplies in the linen closet in the hall bathroom. Each step you took felt like twenty, but before anymore anxiety ridden thoughts could swarm your mind, you found yourself outside of the bathroom door.

The light that illuminated from under the door told you that they are still in there. The door was cracked up a smidge, and you were able to see a sliver Shawn’s side profile. With a deep breath, you raised your hand to knock on the door, but stopped mid-way when you caught wind of their conversation.

“So,” it was Brian who started talking first, “What was that back there?”

“What was what?” He was playing dumb, just like you had done with Olivia.

Brian let out a scoff, “Y/n? Dude, c’mon, you know what I’m talking about.” His words were slightly slurred together, letting you in on that Brian was tipsy.

There was a pause on the other side of the door and you could see Shawn slightly shrugging his shoulders, eyes avoiding Brian’s questioning gaze.

But then he spoke up, changing the conversation completely onto someone else, “Miranda keeps texting me.”

You had never heard that name before.

“Miranda?” Brian asked, “Is she the one from L.A.?”

Brian spoke as if there were other girls he kept around the world for whenever he traveled. And he spoke her name as if he was familiar with it.

“Yeah,” Shawn said as you heard a cabinet door shut, “She came to the shows out there.”

“And?”

You were pressed up close to the door, torn between wanting to hear about the girl who Shawn was smitten with and wanting to run out to the kitchen to continue living in your head, convinced that Shawn loved you back.

“I like her,” but what made your heartbreak even more was how you could hear the smile on his face, “I like her a lot.”

You held your breath. The vodka coke that had coated your throat in confidence was now as dry as a desert. You swallowed the lump in your throat, but it came right back.

Brian sounded just as shocked as you felt, “But––A few minutes ago––What about Y/n?”

There was a pause. You pressed your lips tightly together in hopes for it to stop the trembling you felt coarse throughout your body. Hands balled in fists at your sides, you screwed your eyes shut and started to count to ten, wishing you could wake up from this nightmare.

One…Two…Three…Four…

“She’s different.”

Different. You were different in every way possible than this new girl who had captured his attention. You were different in that he didn’t have feelings for you like he did for this new girl. He didn’t love you like you loved him.

The tightness in your throat was beginning to be too much, your throat scratchier every time you swallowed your tears back. The piercing sting behind your eyes started to hurt. You had never been pricked with tiny needles on your skin, but you imagined it felt something similar to the pain behind our eyes.

“Besides,” Shawn cleared his throat, “She’s just a friend.”

He didn’t even call you his best friend.

And when you thought that the boy you loved so fiercely couldn’t say anything more to ruin your confidence, he decided to speak once more, “I’ve never––I don’t love her.”

It was with that last sentence, the one sentence Shawn spoke with an unnerving amount of confidence, that hit your heart like a hammer. Throughout this whole conversation, you slowly felt your heart being picked away at with an ice pick. Each part of your heart that broke off held a memory full of love that was now forgotten in the pit of your stomach.

“Who said anything about loving her?” As tipsy as Brian was, he was quick with his question.

Shawn avoided his question all together, “We’ve got some cleaning to do.”

The hall bathroom wasn’t large, so you knew they would be out in a matter of seconds. And if you didn’t move fast enough, it would be revealed that you had heard their whole conversation.

You ran down the hallway, feeling your heart being destroyed even more with every step back into the kitchen. The conversation played in your head, having a hard time believing what you had just heard.

Told you so, the irrational part of your brain mocked you.

The rational part of your mind stayed silent.

You angrily wiped away a stray tear that had leaked past your eye, cursing at yourself for being so stupid.

With the scattered state your mind was in, as it uselessly tried to mend your heart, Brian and Shawn’s footsteps caught you by surprise. The glass in your hand fell from your grasp as it shattered into little shards on the floor.

The broken glass looked a lot like how your heart felt.

Quickly, you dropped to the ground, collecting the little pieces of glass in your hand. You pricked yourself a few times, but you were numb to everything around you that it didn’t matter.

“Y/n––Hey, stop-–Let me get it––Y/n.”

You stopped picking up the shards of glass when you felt his hand circle around your wrist. You didn’t look up at him until he said your name again. There had never been a time where you didn’t want him to touch you. That’s all you yearned for when he was away; his touch. Whether it was an accidental brush of your fingers, a slight squeeze to your hip when you were cooking, or his head on your shoulder when he fell asleep during 10 Things I Hate About You…His touch was all that mattered to you at one point.

But even after unknowingly breaking your heart, his touch was still warm.

“Are you okay?” He still kept a hand locked around your wrist, “What happened?”

But now you wanted nothing more than to rip yourself of his hold. You felt uncomfortable under his gaze, nauseous as he looked into your eyes with such concern, but the worst part was, you still loved him.

“Yeah, I…” you broke eye contact with him, knowing that the sting behind your eyes was begging for another reason to overflow. And staring into his eyes would cause the floodgates to open, “Just clumsy.”

You let out a small laugh as he slowly released his grip in your hand, “Leave it, I’ll clean it up after I take care of Tyler’s mess.”

And just like he did earlier in the night, he left without a second thought.

Knowing Shawn like the back of your hand was a skill you were proud to have. You could always tell by the tone of his voice if something was off and wouldn’t back down until he told you. Every eyebrow raise, nose twitch, certain looks he would get in his eyes that let you into how he was feeling…You were able to pinpoint his emotions in a matter of seconds.

Maybe, you thought to yourself, just maybe he doesn’t know you as well as you thought.

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emmakayh · 3 years

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Pupusas

We have had pupusas only a few times - they are an El Salvadoran dish made of a thick corn tortilla and filled with beans, cheese, and meat. The best we’ve had were in San Francisco a few years ago, and we keep saying we’ll find a place in KC that has the best, but frankly we haven’t really looked all that hard.

I decided to try and make them during vacation. I had some leftover carnitas and a half pound of ground beef in the freezer, so I thought I would try a few different kinds. Ultimately I made three: refried beans with mozzarella, refried beans with mozzarella and carnitas, and refried beans with mozzarella and ground beef.

You start by making the corn tortillas. It uses Maseca, corn masa flour. We found this at Sunfresh with no problem. You add salt and water, and you’ve got your dough. You then split it into equal-sized balls.

Next, the recipe I used recommended taking a ziploc bag and opening on side (as pictured below). That way you can form the pupusas more cleanly. You take a ball, and you put it inside the bag. Use a big pot to smash the ball flat. It shouldn’t be super, super thing because it needs to be strong enough to hold the filling.

Once you’ve flattened the tortilla, put your filling in. Keep it mind that you’re going to have to close the whole thing up again, so you don’t want to overfill, but you don’t want to be eating just a corn tortilla either.

Next, you’ll close it all back up. Start by folding it in half like a taco and closing it like an empanada. Then remake the ball by pulling the ends up and in. Put the ball back in the bag, and use your pot to flatten again.

The last step is to cook them. It said to cook on medium heat on the stove top with just a little oil to keep it from sticking. This method (the heat that high and just oil) never works for us. It gets too hot and stinks the place out (which it did), so I lowered the heat. It took a lot longer, and I’m still not convinced they were appropriately cooked. I also think because I made so many they sort of dried out.

The flavor of these was good, and it tasted like we remembered, but I still wouldn’t make these again. There was too much tortilla, and I don’t think I cooked them quite right. It’s another recipe where it’s fun to do once (it wasn’t fun last night - I was really disappointed), but it’s worth it to just find a place that’s an expert.

Also, yes, those are the nubs of just tortilla I didn’t eat, just like Becky.

Recipe: https://thriftandspice.com/how-to-make-pupusas

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callboxkat · 5 years

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Infinitesimal (part 14)

Author’s note: This chapter is a day late because of the whole log-out thing, but I hope you guys enjoy it!

Warnings: Food mention, nervousness, talk of illness and injuries

Word count: 1756

Check the notes for the masterpost!

...

Roman had made something called ‘tacos’ for dinner. He set a saucer before Patton with a flourish, which held a smaller version of one of these weird foods: a very flat piece of bread topped with some kind of meat, cheese just as soft as what Logan had brought him earlier, and lettuce. There was also a bit of some kind of red sauce off to the side. Roman handed Logan his plate and then showed Patton how to eat the taco, by rolling up the bread—the ‘tortilla’—and eating it that way.

“That’s called ‘salsa’,” Roman said, seeing Patton eyeing the sauce. “It’s spicy, and I wasn’t sure if you’d like it, so I left it off to the side.”

Patton hesitantly reached towards it, dipping the tip of his finger in the sauce.

“Just try a little,” Roman warned.

Patton licked the tip of his finger, and he immediately jerked away, making a face. What the heck was that?

Roman looked like he was trying not to laugh. “No salsa, then,” he commented, sounding amused.

Logan shook his head with a sigh. “I told you he wouldn’t like it. He likely doesn’t have much experience with spicy food. A taste for foods containing capsaicin is built up over time—no one is born desensitized to it.”

“I just thought he could try it!” Roman defended himself. “You never know.”

“No, but I had a strong hypothesis and supportive evidence. You had neither.”

Roman gasped, putting a hand on his chest and looking affronted. “You’re the one who said we shouldn’t make assumptions about him! Or did you forget that?”

Patton was starting to feel on edge, until he noticed that both humans were grinning as they argued. It wasn’t a serious fight. He released his breath slowly, picking up a piece of cheese to get the taste of the salsa out of his mouth.

…

Once Virgil had finished mending his and his brother’s clothes, he made his way back to their bedroom. Emile, still curled up in bed, mumbled something in his sleep. He looked pretty cozy, nestled there in the blankets.

Since Virgil was planning to go out tonight, he should probably get some rest beforehand. Right?

That was all the self-motivation he needed. He set his crutches to the side, removed his shoes, and crawled into the nest, curling up at his brother’s side. Emile tended to move around in his sleep, so as usual, Virgil made sure his left foot was away from his brother so that the odds of him accidentally bumping into it were small.

Curled up in that warm bundle of blankets with his brother sleeping peacefully at his side, Virgil closed his eyes.

…

Patton decided that he liked tacos. He wasn’t exactly a fan of the salsa, but the tacos themselves were pretty tasty. They had cheese, anyway, which he had decided he very much liked.

“Have you finished eating?” Logan asked after a while.

Patton looked down at his plate. There was quite a bit of food left on it, in addition to the all-but-untouched salsa; but Patton didn’t think he could eat any more. He nodded, and Logan reached to take the saucer.

When he walked out of the room with all of the plates, Roman turned to Patton. “Hey, Pat?”

Patton looked up, already apprehensive, but Roman just smiled reassuringly at him. “I just wanted to ask how you were feeling.”

Patton shrugged. He was okay. He still had a headache, and he was a little dizzy, but that was nothing new. Neither was as bad as usual, so he supposed that was positive. He was still tired, unsurprisingly, but he was warm with his blankets over his lap, his stomach was comfortably full, and he had a container of water that he could drink from whenever he got thirsty.

“Can’t complain,” he said quietly.

…

Emile had left about fifteen minutes ago to find more food for the pair of littles. Virgil was still waiting: he hadn’t wanted to immediately follow his brother out just in case Emile had forgotten something. It would be awkward if he returned and found Virgil missing.

After about twenty minutes, when Virgil had grown too impatient to wait any longer, he set out.

He made his way through the walls down to the apartment where Patton was being kept, and then to one of the entrances into the room he was in. He snuck carefully out, glad to see that the room was as dark and silent as he had hoped to find it.

Virgil emerged from the hidden doorway in the wall, pushing the piece of the baseboard back into place once he was in the room. It was precisely cut so that when the pieces lined up right, the humans would never be able to tell that a doorway was hidden there. One he was sure the pieces were properly aligned, Virgil pushed aside the curtain that trailed down to cover this portion of the wall and looked towards the table where he expected to find Patton. He could see part of the cage from here, but he couldn’t see the little yet.

Virgil made quick work of getting to the base of the table, wanting to be in the open for as short a time as possible, even at this time of night. When he got to the table leg, he looked around once more, just to be extra sure he really was alone, and then started to fasten his crutches to his back. He leaned on the table leg as he got them secured, not looking to stumble and accidentally put too much weight on his bad foot.

Then, he began to climb.

…

Virgil hoisted himself up onto the table, panting. He quickly loosened the string around his waist and looked around for Patton, only to pause.

Patton wasn’t in the cage, but was instead lying on the table just outside of it. At least, Virgil thought it was him. He was underneath some blankets, which were pulled up to nearly cover his head. Virgil cautiously moved closer. For all he knew, it was just a doll wrapped up in fabric, an attempt to trick him into thinking it was the little.

“Patton?” he whispered.

The form under the blankets shifted, pale hands pushing the blankets aside as Patton’s eyes flickered open. He squinted sleepily. “…Virgil?”

Virgil sighed in relief. “Hey, there. It’s me.”

“You came back,” Patton said, his words somewhat slurred. He sounded happy about it, even if he was still half-asleep.

“I did,” Virgil confirmed.

Patton’s eyes had started to drift shut again. Virgil closed the remaining distance between them and gently shook his shoulder. “Hey, wait. Don’t go back to sleep yet, okay?”

“Mmm.”

Once Virgil was sure that Patton was paying attention, he asked, “How are you doing? Have the humans hurt you?”

“I’m fine.” Patton sounded more alert than before. “They haven’t hurt me.”

“Do you know what they’re planning to do with you?”

“No… I don’t know what they’re planning. It’s weird… like they’re not planning anything. They said they’re gonna let me go.”

“Patton, you have to know that they’re not really going to let you go.”

“I know,” he mumbled, breaking off to yawn. “But they let me stay out here tonight.”

Virgil knew that this choice was probably only because Patton would have a hard time escaping at the moment. Sure, he had made it to the floor before, and the humans didn’t know that he had had help, but they probably also assumed that Patton didn’t have an escape route from the apartment itself. Virgil supposed that might even be true, since Patton wasn’t familiar with the pathways and hidden doors in the building. The humans probably saw it as a nearly risk-free way of tricking the little into trusting them. But judging by Patton’s subdued tone, he already knew this, too.

“I’m not going to leave you here,” Virgil promised.

Patton started to sit up. “Are we going now?”

“No,” he said regretfully. “Whatever the humans want, I think they want you healthy first. So, if it’s okay with you, I’d like to wait until you’re feeling better to get you out of here. You barely made it down to the floor last time. I just want to make sure that we get you out of here in one piece.”

Patton pouted, but he nodded his consent. Virgil blinked, having expected him to at least try to change his mind, to insist on getting out of there sooner.

“In the meantime, I need you to act sick,” Virgil eventually continued.

“But I am sick,” the other little mumbled, confused.

“I know. But the longer the humans think you’re sick, the longer I think we have until they do anything. So just… act a bit sicker than you actually are. Just so we can be sure to get you out in time. I won’t wait long, I promise.”

Patton hesitated a moment, but then he nodded.

“Do you need anything?” Virgil asked. He’d prefer not to stay here longer than necessary, but he wanted to make sure that Patton would be okay while he was gone.

There was a long pause. Virgil quirked an eyebrow at Patton.

“Could you stay?” he finally asked.

Virgil glanced back the way he had come, then turned his gaze to Patton again, giving him a doubtful expression. Patton retaliated with puppy-dog eyes, and Virgil sighed. He nodded in reluctant agreement. He could stay for a while, he supposed.

Patton moved his blankets aside, clearly wanting the other little to join him. Virgil lay down beside him, and Patton scooted back to make more room. The two ended up lying under the blankets together, sharing a pillow. Virgil gingerly put an arm around Patton, unsure if he had any other injuries that he wasn’t aware of. Patton made a little pleased sound and snuggled closer.

“Hey, Patton?” Virgil asked quietly.

“Hmm?” Patton seemed to be already well on his way to falling back asleep.

“If the humans didn’t do this to you… what did happen? You don’t have to tell me, obviously, I mean; I don’t want to press. But…” Virgil trailed off.

Patton shifted, keeping his eyes shut.

“Sorry, that was stupid. I shouldn’t ask things like that. Just go back to sleep.”

“No,” Patton mumbled. “It’s okay.” He opened one eye. “I’ll tell you what happened to me… if you tell me what happened to you.”

...

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#thomas sanders #sanders sides #virgil sanders #patton sanders #logan sanders #roman sanders #infinitesimal!sides #infinitesimal fic #g/t #sanders sides fan fiction #ts fanfic

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lokis-lady-death · 6 years

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Interview with a God Pt 5

Tom Hiddleston/Loki x reader

Prompt: I have always heard people joke that Tom Hiddleston is actually Loki playing Tom playing Loki. So, let’s write about it XD

Part 1 , Part 2 , Part 3 , Part 4

Interview with a God Part 5

11:30. You still had time to review your photos just a few more minutes before Tom showed up. You let out a deep yawn. Turning the music up, you took a deep slug of your energy drink. This had to be done. You tapped your foot and bobbed your head to the beats playing through your headphones, fixing the second set of errors the editors found (because there are always more edits to make) while going back and forth with the photographer (who’s feelings were still hurt after Tom asked for you to do the photo review instead of him). You were so deep into your work you didn’t notice the footsteps enter your office.

“Darling,” you heard inside of your headphones. The voice nearly made you jump from your seat, no less when you looked up to see him standing there, dressed in a black button up and jeans. “Are you ready to go?” He shot you a flirty smile before leaning over your desk.

You pushed the headphones as you felt yourself get lost in his eyes. “I still have...” the clock was 11:50. “Oh no. I’m sorry. Let me finish this real quick and I can leave.” You went to look back at your laptop when he slammed it closed.

“Hey!” you snapped.

“We had an agreement,” he spoke so plainly, as if reading a bylaw before a court. “You and I were to go to lunch at noon. It’s time to head downstairs.”

“I will as soon as I finish this last part of my email.” You didn’t raise your voice but you didn’t look away from him.

At a loss at either what to say next or what to think about your insubordination, Tom stared blankly at you while you opened your laptop back up and began working. He sighed and sat across from you, still watching you intensely.

When the clock read 12:00 exactly, he asked again, “Are you ready to go?”

“I have just one more thing…..”

“It is noon. You agreed to be done working by now.”

“I also suggested dinner instead so I wouldn’t be rushing yet here we are,” you offered back with a shrug and fake grin.

You could see something behind Tom’s eyes spark as he walked beside you, blocking the view of the rest of the office. He leaned against the desk before saying, “Take off your panties in the most discreet way possible.”

The words hadn’t resonated with you before you started to shimmy in your chair, sliding your fingers up your skirt and pulling at your underwear.

“Slower,” he added.

Your movements slowed to a crawl, feeling the elastic inch it’s way down your thighs. “Loki,” you breathed low, suddenly mortified. The red panties popped off your high heels and you collected them in your lap.

Your hands were trembling.

How did he make you do that?

“Stand up.”

And you stood, feeling a weakness in your legs at what was happening.

“Leave your panties in the drawer.”

You folded them and slipped them into your desk.

“Now let’s go,” he told you as he leaned in, taking in your scent. He turned your face towards him, his eyes flashing. “Or would you like to see what happens next?”

“Let’s go.”

Tom smiled, leading you out of your office with a hand on the small of your back. “Good. because now I’m starving.”

Just as you got to the elevator, you heard a familiar voice call your name. “Ms. y/n.” You turned in time to see Mr. Stringer, one of the lead editors in the magazine. He was basically the man that ensured or destroyed your career making article hit the newstands.

You stiffineed, looking to Tom with pleading eyes to let you talk to him. You couldn’t handle messing things up at the last minute. His mouth was a tight line, on the verge of telling you no but he sighed and stopped walking.

Mr. Stringer beamed with overly white teeth against a golfing tan. “Hi, Elliot Stringer. It’s great to meet you, Mr. Hiddleston. Huge fan. Especially of your latest accomplishment we have the privilege of bestowing upon you!”

Tom was like night and day suddenly, beaming back just a grandly to your boss. “Hello, Mr. Stringer, it’s wonderful to meet you! And the pleasure is all mine to get to be a part of this wonderful magazine.”

But Elliot was looking at you now, his smile altering just a bit. “And we have Ms. y/n to thank for that, don’t we?”

You had to suppress a gasp when Tom’s hand lowered from you back to your ass, giving one tight solid squeeze. “Yes, I suppose we do.”

“Speaking of, Ms. y/n. I see you’re out to lunch. Would you mind meeting with me before sending in your final edit for the article? I had a few things I wanted to go over with you. Face to face seemed more appropriate than another email.”

There was a nervous smile on your face. You never cared for your face to face time with Elliot. “N-no problem,” you stuttered, as Tom squeezed just one more time, the sensation radiating up your core. “I’ll be back soon. Bye!” You turned on the ball of your heel and quick stepped into the elevator with Tom hot on your trail.

As soon as the doors shut you let out a panicked breath, not realizing you had been inhaling so deep to keep calm and maintain straight faced. Tom smiled down at you, amused with it all.

You wanted to ask what the hell was that, what the hell was he pulling, what the hell was going on. But you didn’t. While looking up in his eyes, seeing his complacent grin on his face you realized something that hadn’t crossed your mind before.

You didn’t really know Loki.

You knew of him from what little Norse mythology you read, from the comic books and movies by Marvel. But what did you actually know about the god of mischief?

Tom reached up and ran a finger down the curve of your cheek, cusping at your chin as the elevator dinged. “Smile, darling.”

And you did.

You both exited the building with your arm looked in his. He led you to the street and ushered you into the back of a fully tinted out escalade.

The first thing you noticed was a privacy window like in the limo to keep the driver and riders separate.

“Well, y/n,” he asked as the door closed behind him. “What shall we eat?”

You stared blankly at your reflection in the blacked window.

Tom’s brow furrowed as he asked, “Are you alright?” Your eyes met his and he let out a sigh. “Is this about the panties thing because I did have you do it discreetly so I’m sure no one even noticed it….” You still didn’t answer as he pulled back his sleeve to look at his watch. “It’s also 12:05 so we are currently 5 minutes behind schedule and you have made no suggestions on food. Pick somewhere.”

“How about tacos….” The words came out of your mouth but it felt like someone else talking. “There’s a food truck over by the park this time of day. Why don’t we do that?”

Tom tilted his head to the side, looking at you, trying to figure you out like you were some complex puzzle. “Yes,” he said finally, “That sounds good.” He instructed the driver and you felt the car take off into traffic.

The escalade stopped at the outskirts of the park so you and Tom could walk up to the truck. Despite your nerves, you couldn’t suppress a giggle when he combed his red curls back and pulled on a fedora.

“It’s a disguise,” he argued.

“It’s a terrible disguise.”

He scoffed and cocked the hat to the side. “It’s brilliant and you’re just jealous you don’t have a hat.”

You were glad to feel a little of the tension leave you but it didn’t completely calm your raging mind. Grateful for the distraction of food, you took in the smell of overly sauced meat and cheese as the cook passed you your taco. Tom took his and followed you to an abandoned park bench.

“Do you have lunch here often?” he asked before taking a bite.

You gingerly folded the tortilla over to keep it from spilling out. “Only when I get a chance to get away. I usually work through lunch, so my friend Sue comes and picks us up something.” You looked around, realizing it was rather quiet for lunch time. There were usually other trucks out by now, usually other people on their breaks.

You took a bite of food, sure that you just couldn’t handle one more confusing moment in your life.

Looking back at him as he took another large bite of his taco, you just couldn’t stop the roller coaster of thoughts. He looked so normal, but he didn’t in the moment of telling you what to do. You went back to earlier, Tom telling you to take your underwear off. The absolute lack of self control you had was gut wrenching. He could have asked you to bend over and present yourself for and you would have done it. There was something so significantly different about him then and him now that it just chipped away at you.

“Darling? You’re not eating?”

You were startled back to reality, not even aware you had been staring at him as you thought. “Oh, yes,” you started, bringing it up to your mouth, “just lost in thought.”

“And what could you possibly be thinking about, little one?”

You met his gaze, suddenly noticing his tone slip. That little flash in his eye.

“So many questions….”

As if Tom lost interest, he went back to his food, finishing off the last bite. “Questions are boring,” he said finally. “I prefer actions.”

You couldn’t look away now, locked onto him, looking for that glimpse of god that peeks out ever so slightly behind this blue eyed brit. Where was that norse god?

“What if I made it a game?”

“What?”

“The questions,” you explained. “What if I made asking and answering questions a game?”

This definitely got Tom’s interest. “Explain the game, darling.”

You cleared the throat, every last one of your nerves on edge. “Well, it’s, um. Yes. I ask you a question about yourself, and uh then I ask you a question. About me. And that’s pretty much the game.”

“Shouldn’t there be a way to win if this is a game?” He was smiling now, a little crook at the edge of his lips and he leaned closer to you. “Perhaps a punishment if you lose?”

You felt a lump in your throat as you suppressed a gasp. “Okay. But I’m not omniscient, how would I know you’re lying?”

Tom’s smile shifted, but his eyes didn’t look insulted. Rather intrigued. “If I make you a promise to tell you the truth. A god cannot break a promise made. It’s like a of check and balance system.”

There was something extremely sincere and raw about him telling you this. He seemed curious as to what you would do with this information.

“Ok, let’s do that.”

The look on his face, the inner battle between whether or not this was something he would regret. He must have liked his chances because he nodded. “I, Loki Odinson, promise to tell y/n of midgard the truth. Always.”

“Alright, me first. You controlled me. Earlier, in my office. The panties? How?”

Tom looked less than impressed. “I’m a god, y/n. Influence is something we possess.”

“So you can just tell someone what to do and they’ll do it?”

“Absolutely. Now. That’s two questions. I have two points.”

“How did you get here? Earth?”

“You’re not even playing your own game right…” But Tom let out a sigh. “I was cast from Asgard.”

“Why?”

His eyes narrowed, not finding your questions charming anymore. “It's my turn.” His fingers caught your chin and brought you close as he asked, “What did you think it meant to give yourself to a god?”

“I…” you were like a deer in headlights, staring into his eyes. “I…” A current went over him, cascading raven hair over his shoulders, his eyes a mixture of menacing and playful. You eyes widened and you looked around, sure someone would notice. But you were so wrapped up in speaking to Tom you hadn’t notice the truck drive off. Or the last few people in the park to walk away. There was not a soul in sight.

“That's not an answer, darling.” Loki’s hand ran his hands up your thighs. “I'm counting it as a win. So… what’s my reward?” His fingers dug into your soft skin while he leaned you back, his mouth taking yours.

Before you could get a coherent thought, his phone began to buzz. He let out an audible annoyance before checking the time. “Well, y/n, you seem to be getting off before paying your tribute.” He added, “I’ll be sure to collect it at another time.”

You hadn’t even noticed he change back to Tom, his facial scruff pillowed up while he smiled down at you. The next thing you knew, he was dropping you off in front of the People’s corporate office.

You blinked several times at the doorman before finally making your way to the elevator and back to your desk. You were completely zoned out when you looked down at your laptop, brushing off the personal note from Elliot Stringer written out to come see him as soon as you were back. You’d see him as soon as you finished those edits.

The time clicked by faster than expected before Sue stuck her head in your doorway. “Mr. Stringer asked if you were still coming by to talk to him?”

“Oh shit,” you exclaimed, jumping from the chair. You grabbed your folder and bolted past Sue.

“No need to freak out or anything!” she yelled back.

Photography and Editing were located on the floor below yours so it wasn’t too hard to scale the stairwell (the elevator took too long). You rushed into the department and sought out Elliot Stringer’s office. His door was open and you took two steps in before realizing how rude you were, took two steps back and knocked.

You could hear Mr. Stringer laugh as he called out, “Come in!”

You came in and offered a polite smile. “I’m so sorry it’s so late, I got caught up in the edits.”

“That’s exactly what I was meaning to call you in for. The edits.” He fumbled through his desk and found a stack to hand you. As he leaned across the table, you saw something peculiarly bright sticking out of his pocket. A napkin, you figured. “I went ahead and did them to save you the trouble.”

He was flashing you his overly bleached teeth like he was offering you a gift. But as you looked over what he handed you, it was anything but. “This isn’t my article.”

“Yes it is,” he argued, never losing his grin. “See, says so right there.” He points to the article author where you name was bolded.

“No, it’s my name, but this isn’t my article. I didn’t write this.” You tossed the papers on his desk. “What is this about?”

“It’s… juicier.”

“It’s porn!” you snapped off. In fact, the article for Sexiest Man Alive had nearly remodeled into some sort of sexual fantasy. The original questions were taken out to be replaced by Sex and the City style jargon. It’s not that you didn’t like the article itself but it certainly wasn’t flattering to you nor was it appropriate. “This isn’t Cosmo, you can’t print this type of thing.”

“It’s sort of your fault, you know,” Elliott said as he walked around the desk beside you with a tabloid in his hand. “You’re all over the cover of Star magazine with Tommy boy.” There you were, completely wrapped in Tom’s arms in front of the restaurant last night. Your cheeks flushed and you looked away. Your eyes caught the brightness in his pocket again. It was red.

Your attention was brought back when you felt him tentatively graze his fingers across your lower back. You stepped back, looking back up at Mr. Stringer, and asked, “Who else has seen the garbage you’re trying to pass off as mine?”

“The director.” He offered a condescending look with a shrug. “She thinks it’s a good play.”

You bit you lip and let out a huff. “Let me talk to Tom… Mr. Hiddleston before you let anyone read this.”

His lips curled and he handed you the article back. “I’ll do you one better. I’ll let you take it to him to read it himself.”

Your eyes burned daggers into him but he was unphased. Elliot had been at this business longer than you and you were sure his opinion would be heard before yours. In a huff you left.

In your office you gathered your things, ready to be done with this exhausting day. Before you locked your desk up, you realized you had forgotten about your underwear. But when you opened the draw, they weren’t there.

And then you remembered the red napkin in Elliot’s pocket. What if it wasn’t a napkin?

Part 6 is up!

Special Appearance of Matt Bomer as Elliot Stringer!!

(Picture not my own)

Like my garbage? Read more of it! Master List

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#loki #loki fanfic #loki x reader #loki x you #loki x oc #oc #marvel fanfiction #marvel smutt #marvel #loki (marvel)#Lady Death Writes #tom hiddleston #tom hiddleston x reader #tom hiddleston x oc

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sarahunfiltered-blog1 · 6 years

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My Diet/Fitness/Nutrition Journey Thus Far

Most of the memories I have of life growing up revolve mostly around food. I remember growing up and all we’d eat was Sonic, Dairy Queen, Whataburger, McDonald’s, Taco Bell, Wendy’s, you name it, I ate it. I could still to this day probably tell you my order from each place. I was raised on Hamburger Helper, Ramen noodles, Rice a Roni, canned and boxed everything, candy and soda.

I remember when I was around maaaaaybe 12-13 and my mom doing a diet that may have been slim quick or something along the lines of you eat chicken and veggies, take these pills and do some sort of workout. I had a really bad sweet tooth (still do) as a kid and I started to gain weight and at 13 I was 165lbs, so my mom included me into her diet routine and I would eat the chicken and veggies, rice cakes, a tbsp of coconut oil and would chew sugar gum and we’d walk between the stop signs on the street we lived on and I’d do her workouts with her. I remember watching my brothers and sisters eating candy while I ate my caramel rice cakes because I was the bigger one of all of them, so for the longest time I was just the fat tomboy of a girl that would stare at herself in the mirror and look at how big my butt was at 13 and hating it and my stomach to stuck out and my fat face. I remember I used to grab my stomach and cry and scream about how much I hated it. If only I were skinny I’d be enough. I would sneak and binge on sweets, it was my comfort, it was there for me and it made me feel better

When I got my period and more of my hormones kicked in I lost a lot of weight. I want to say I got down to 125 when I was around 14-15 and I wouldn’t eat because I was extremely depressed. My sweet tooth was still there, but I wouldn’t eat because I thought eating would make me fat, so I wouldn’t and when I did it was minimal. I ate a lot of 100 calorie snacks, drank juice like V8 because I thought it was healthy, diet coke because it was diet and wouldn’t make me fat. When I was 16 I started working at Target and they have a Pizza Hut Cafe and almost every shift I would go pick up there bread sticks and a diet Pepsi and that would be my lunch (the thought of that now literally makes me cringe). I went to a bible college from 17-almost 18 and ate Ramen noodles and whatever shit food they served while I was there, but I didn’t know any different so I just ate it. I was still pretty skinny because ya know I was 15-17 and you can eat like shit and still be a twig.

When I turned 18 and moved out of my parents house my diet didn’t suuuuper change. I was still living a hardcore Taco Bell and Pizza Hut bread sticks and diet coke life style because I was living on my own, broke as a joke and ate the food I was used to eating, but then I gained probably 30lbs easily within a short amount of time (surprise surprise). I had spent my whole time as a teenager not wanting to be the fat kid and here I was back at 165lbs... wtf. I didn’t really know how to cook, didn’t have money for groceries, refused to apply for food stamps, so I just thought starting to workout would cure all my problems. Well, it didn’t long story short. I mean why didn’t working out and running for an hour THEN going eat Taco Bell work? I was working out, right? HA.

I remember scrolling Pinterest when I discovered it and finding the “Military Diet” and giving that a go. You basically don’t eat anything for 3 days and could apparently lose 10lbs. I wanted to DIE during that diet. I made it the first time around and lost 5lbs, then gave it another go and didn’t make it 2 days and stopped by Taco Bell on my way home from work and binged on that. So my diet search continued... One of my coworkers at the time started using My Fitness Pal to track her calories and she was losing weight like crazy, so I obviously I needed to give it a go and the weight just started falling fall. I went from 165lbs to 125lbs within a matter a months. I didn’t work out, I just ate less than 1,500 calories a day, cold turkey stopped eating candy, drinking soft drinks and unfortunately my Pizza Hut bread sticks. Everything was going GREAT. When I wanted to go down to the next lbs and I was 0.2 from it I would pop a few laxatives the night before and then would weight myself the next morning after shitting my brains out, but I HAD to lose that 0.2lbs.. just had to. I became overly obsessed with counting calories and eating lean cuisines and and 100 calories snacks and drinking Naked juice and weighing myself DAILY and measuring every single little thing I ate and would legit cry if I went over my calories. Funny, not so funny story. One weekend I was headed to my mom’s and had already eaten all of my calories for the day, but was staaaaaaaarving, so I stopped by Jimmy John’s and ate a sandwich that was 800ish calories, which put me 800ish calories over what I was “allowed” to eat, so you bet your ass I drug all of my brother and sisters and mom to a walking trail and walked/ran until I burned off the entire sandwich because I wouldn’t sleep peaceful knowing what I did by eating that sandwich. It was bad, just so bad. I remember the day I hit a breaking point and just wanted some damn chocolate chop cookies, but didn’t have the calories saved for it, but I binged on them anyways and cried in Michael’s arms over what I did and he was telling me it was fiiiiiiine and all the sweet things he could, but it wasn’t to me in that moment, but in that moment I just knew I needed to stop all of this, so I did. I feel like I remember just deleting the app off my phone and being done with it. I was 20 at this point and working a standing job.

Beginning in February of 2014 I started a corporate sitting job, so I didn’t have access to Starbucks or a grocery store on my breaks like I did working at Target, so I had to start bringing my lunches and snacks and to top it all off I was sitting. As you could maybe imagine I started gaining weight from being stagnant and snacking ALL day at my desk (#teamnutrigrain). I put on a good 20lbs within the first couple of months. So I started going for walks on my breaks, eating a lean cuisine a day, eating more fresh fruits and veggies, almonds, and limited my snacking to only in the afternoons and that kind of helped and worked for me for a long time and I stayed at a healthy maybe 140ish lbs and that worked for me because I was still skinny. All about that skinny life because skinny = healthy, right? Well, I thought so.

I turned 21 and didn’t go crrazzzyy drinking, but I drank moscato and margarita’s often enough and still was all about my Friday candy binge. I was also drinking up to 3 cups of coffee a day at work and just couldn’t figure out why I was sweating and so anxious all the time. I genuinely thought it was from work when in reality I was just pumping myself with coffee after coffee after coffee day in and day out (I’ve learned since my lesson since then). I went through a phase of HIIT workout and running, but that faded really quick, but I really enjoyed hiking when I gave it a go, still do. Along with yoga which I am planning to make a goal of starting a practice in 2018.

Around the time I turned 22-23 my older sister, Meghann, had a baby and really educated herself around living a more holistic lifestyle and it really intrigued me and around that time I had discovered podcasts and I realized how much processed foods aren’t the best choice and what I could do as an alternative way of going about eating, so I stopped lean cuisine’s (haven’t had one since), milk and yogurt along with limiting candy and processed snacks. I completely cleaned my desk out at work from all the sugar filled granola bars and whatever else I had in there and started to work with that. I shortly thereafter learned about one of the best ways of going about what to eat/not eat is if it didn’t come from the earth and/or has a label on it to think twice before eating it and READ the back of the label if you do. This is still newer-ish to me to do and I’m currently learning about all things nutrition, and how the mind, body and spirit all work together and you can’t have one fully without the other.

As of now I don’t drink dairy milk, I limit cheese but still love it, I grocery shop once a week and buy as much organic produce as possible, I am still working on the meat switch when it comes to buying organic meat (not quite there yet), I cold turkey stopped eating candy and have found organic, non high fructose corn syrup filled alternatives when I have a sweet tooth, I haven’t been drinking alcohol much the last 2 months or so (don’t have a legit reasoning behind it, just doesn’t sound good), I am really into cooking paleo, vegan, Whole30 friendly foods because it coincides with my eating from the earth method I live by and when I want Whataburger breakfast on a Friday or a taco with a flour tortilla or a real homemade chocolate chip cookie I happily will eat it because I do not believe in living a restricted lifestyle. My entire life leading up to recently whether it was mentally, spiritually or physically has been restricted and I’m not OK with it because it’s limiting and keeps me in a box. I’m a believer in the energy you put into something is negative the outcome will be negative, so if I’m to sit here and say “this is cookie is SO bad for me. OMG. I am going to gain 10lbs.” Well, I’m asking for it to happen, versus eating the cookie cause I want the damn cookie and loving every bit. They doesn’t mean I sit there and eat 12, it just means my mindset around food was so terrible for so long and I know what it did to me mentally that is not worth it for me to be negative about it. I am content and happy with where I am out now, I don’t even care to weigh myself anymore, I don’t body shame myself anymore, I don’t calorie count, I don’t binge, I don’t use food as a reward system, I just educate myself around it, listen to my body and see how it feels and go from there. My anxiety has lessened, I sleep so much better, I feel so peaceful inside and out, and my skin has completely cleared up (I’ll talk about my skincare routine future post). It’s been a long, ongoing journey, but I am thankful for the million and 2 podcasts I’ve listened to, my sister and everyone else along the way to get me to where I am today and I am excited to continue to learn and grow and now have a place to share all the info I am taking in and it maybe help someone else. :)

- Sarah xo

#food #nutrition #exercise #lifetip #health #wellness

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junker-town · 4 years

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New MLB stadium food in 2020, ranked

Some of these are amazing. Others ... not so much.

The best arms race in baseball, hands down, is weird ballpark food. With Opening Day around the corner, we ranked 19 of the most ludicrous menu items teams are serving up this season.

No. 1: Chicken Churro Sandwich (Detroit Tigers) “Chicken tender topped with Michigan maple syrup on a churro bun”

There is not a single thing wrong with this. It feels like a twist on chicken and waffles in a way I can absolutely get down with. Sometimes you don’t need to cram nine million things into a single food item. Just give me some fried chicken and something sweet and I’m yours. I do wish there was a heat element to this, but it gets top marks just for using the phrase “churro bun.”

No. 2: Friar’s Fries (San Diego Padres) “Fries, pork belly lechon, chicharron crumbles, pickled red onions, sweet drop peppers, cilantro aioli, scallions, smoked mozzarella”

The entire “loaded fries” concept is a bit of a minefield. My general opinion is throwing stuff on fries is the easy way out in making a “wacky” item that lacks imagination. Friar’s Fries are an exception. You have salty, sweet, and sour, and just when you think it’s all over they hit you with smoked mozzarella. Bravo, Padres.

No. 3: KFC (Minnesota Twins) “Korean fried chicken with a honey, garlic and gochujang sauce”

Yes, I have two fried chicken sandwiches in the top three. Fight me. The KFC sounds simple, but once you dive into the ingredients you know it’s a banger. I’d eat two right now and regret it later.

No. 4: The Pig Mac (Detroit Tigers) “Smoked pulled pork, macaroni and cheese, onion straws, sliced jalapeno peppers, drizzled with BBQ sauce on an onion roll”

As someone who lives in North Carolina, I have a natural and well-earned mistrust of any city outside the state serving up pulled pork. That said, on paper, this hits all the right notes. I need to know whether the pork is served with a proper vinegar-based sauce, or that thick, brown, flavor-masking goop made for children with unevolved palates. The sliced jalapenos are a nice touch.

No. 5: The Rattler (Texas Rangers) “Watch out, this sausage has a bite! A rattlesnake sausage grilled to perfection and served on a fresh hoagie roll. Drizzled with Venom sauce. Served with Lay’s potato chips.”

I don’t really know what to think of this, but I do know I want to try it. I’ve only had rattlesnake once, and it was largely uneventful, but this iteration leaves me with questions. What is Venom sauce? Why are you serving this with plain-ass chips? The mind boggles.

No. 6: Greek Fry (Milwaukee Brewers) “Fries topped with gyro meat, tzatziki sauce, feta crumbles and diced tomatoes.”

Another entry in the “loaded fries” conversation. I like this idea in theory, but it feels a little uninspired. Personally, I would like to see a squeeze of lemon and some parsley to really tie together all these flavors.

No. 7: Nashville Hot Chicken Sliders (St. Louis Cardinals) “Two breaded and fried homestyle chicken breasts with Nashville hot oil and pickles on a slider bun.”

Nashville hot chicken is one of the greatest contributions to the American culinary landscape. This would rank higher on my list, but serving it in St. Louis breaks my brain a little bit. I’m sure it’s good, but probably no better than something I could find locally, which makes it a middle-of-the-pack item.

No. 8: NE Italian Sandwich (Minnesota Twins) “Mortadella, salami, ham and ‘nduja, Alemar cheese fromage blanc with greens and pickled vegetables on Baker’s Field bread.”

Kudos for adding some ‘ndjua here, Twins. For the uninitiated, it’s basically spreadable sausage pate and it’s wonderful. Other than that, this is a pretty bog-standard Italian sandwich, which is excellent, but doesn’t really get me too excited overall.

No. 9: BBQ Brisket and Pork Platter (Chicago White Sox) “In-house smoked brisket or pork served with a choice of two sides: mac ‘n cheese, baked beans or spicy coleslaw, also served with spicy pickle chips and a slice of white bread”

It’s a BBQ plate. Pretty average. Nothing too special or overwhelming. I’m sure it’s fine. I have some serious questions about the “in-house” smoking process. Is someone really coming in hours in advance to smoke this correctly? I just don’t know.

No. 10: Top Dog (St. Louis Cardinals) “1/3-pound hot dogs, bratwursts, and Italian sausages with over 24 cold toppings and six hot toppings available”

This is a hot dog or sausage. It’s fine.

No. 11: The Stack! (Texas Rangers) “Nachos like you have never seen them before! Crisp tostadas layered with Tostitos tortilla chips and your favorite nacho toppings including pulled pork, Rico’s nacho cheese sauce, Rico’s jalapeno peppers and our stadium chili. The perfect nacho for sharing.”

I was really torn on how to grade this one. On the one hand, no, I have not seen nachos on top of tostadas before. I also don’t know if I need to see nachos on top of tostadas. Where this gets marked down is the immense amount of branding on every item. It feels too processed to me, and that’s a turn off. I like that this item has an exclamation point in its name. Makes it feel dangerous.

No. 12: Loaded Poutine Fries (Detroit Tigers) “Crispy waffle fries topped with smoked brisket, cheese curds, smothered in brown gravy”

Poutine is glorious, but this has an inherent structural problem. You have runny brown gravy, so you need a solid item to contain it. Waffle fries aren’t the appropriate fry selection for this dish! An unforced error that should have been caught in testing.

No. 13: Chi Town Fries (Chicago White Sox) “Hot and crispy French fries topped with nacho cheese and our famous Chi Town pico.”

This is when loaded fries get really lazy. Nothing wrong with them, but I wouldn’t order these on a menu.

No. 14: Chicken Sandwich (Milwaukee Brewers) “Hot chicken topped with cabbage slaw, honey mayo and dill pickles.”

They knew this item was so boring it didn’t deserve a fun name.

No. 15: Walking Taco (Chicago White Sox) “A bag of Doritos served with nacho cheese, chili and jalapenos”

Look, I’m sure this is delicious, but I can’t imagine an item that sounds more thrown together by stoners at a 7/11 than this. I have never had a walking taco. In fact, I was so surprised my coworkers all knew what a walking taco was that I was convinced they were gaslighting me. I can go to the gas station right now and make this item myself, so there’s no need to pay a stadium premium for it.

No. 16: Tiger Corn (Detroit Tigers) “Blueberry coated popcorn mixed with cheese popcorn”

Dammit, Tigers, you were doing so well! This is a mess. I can get down on the salty/sweet combo of kettle corn or Cracker Jack, but mixing blueberry with cheese is an abomination. I know you wanted it to reflect your team colors, but this is an affront to tastebuds everywhere.

No. 17: The Smokehouse Parfait (Cincinnati Reds) “BBQ pulled pork, mac and cheese with coleslaw in a bread cone”

Leave it to Cincinnati to take a perfectly fine item and mess it all up by serving this shit in a cone made out of bread. The entire point of a barbecue platter is you can sample around, take your tastebuds on a lap. In parfait form, you’re required to eat barbecue in a regimented, planned order — and that’s not in the spirit of barbecue.

No. 18: The ‘Slugger’ (Cincinnati Reds) “1/4-pound hot dog corn battered and fried (and red!)”

Jesus, Cincinnati, give it a rest. You made a corn dog — good job. Then you’re advertising the fact this is one of those cheap red hot dogs you find on the bottom shelf of the grocery store. That is not a selling point, and you deserve to be scolded for it.

No. 19: S’mores Frybox (Cincinnati Reds) “Crispy fries with marshmallows, chocolate syrup, cinnamon graham crackers and M&M’s”

Now you’re just trolling me, Cincinnati. Dessert fries? You monsters.

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happy2bmyownboss · 5 years

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Oh my goodness, what a day I’ve had and it isn’t even been lunchtime yet. I actually went to bed early last night as I was just so exhausted. Mr. Awesome had a meeting and wouldn’t be home until late so I made the most of the evening.

The kids helped me make Chili Dog Casserole for dinner. We made it a little bit different as we just put the hotdogs into hotdog buns, instead of tortillas, and then spread the chili sauce on top and sprinkled with cheese before baking.

Mr. Awesome is not crazy about the tortilla version so we decided to give it a try this way and it was a WINNER!

We actually had enough leftover that we will be having this again for lunch today which is a GREAT thing!

Multitasking while dinner was in the oven

When we put the casserole in the oven we managed to get six more freezer meals prepared! I actually tried out a few from a freezer bundle pack that we just purchased from Jamerrill Stewart over at Large Family Table. I really admire all the work she is able to get done and love supporting other mom bloggers out there.

After feeding the kiddos I went ahead a browned up the 20 pounds of hamburger we had picked up on Sunday when we actually did TWO Walmart Grocery Pickups… the system was having some glitches and errors but thankfully they seem to have them worked out now.

In about 2 hours we ended up with 8 freezer meals, 4 dinners worth of browned hamburger, and a batch of spaghetti sauce! Not too bad… but this explains part of why I was so exhausted. The other reason is that I just haven’t been sleeping well lately.

We have two each of the following:

Italian chicken (we will serve this over rice)

Chicken Parmesan (similar to THIS RECIPE but we use chicken in place of the breaded eggplant)

Lasagna (made with our favorite spaghetti sauce)

Creamy Ranch Porkchops (very similar to THIS RECIPE minus the rice and we added a pack of dry ranch dressing – we will serve it with rice)

Plus browned hamburger for:

Taco Ring

Daddy Can’t-Wait Casserole

Briarpatch Casserole

Mexican Tortilla Skillet

And a batch of spaghetti sauce that will make a super quick meal later this month. All of these can be paired with pasta or rice, a salad and/or some steamed veggies to make a well-rounded meal. The kids and Mr. Awesome will probably also enjoy some fresh rolls or buttered bread with their meals as well.

Getting back to today

Enough about what we did yesterday… this morning started about like any other day except that I woke up FREEZING! The AC had been left on all night and it was probably cold enough to hang meat… not good for me.

Once I managed to pull myself out of the bed and climb up to turn the AC off it was time to take the doggie out for her walk. Then back for my coffee and oatmeal.

As many of you know, I’ve really been trying hard to incorporate some of the Trim Healthy Mama ideas into my everyday diet. I need to have really like to have my morning coffee and I had switched over to the Dandy Blend before we started on these other diet changes so I wanted to try to make my creamer addiction a little bit healthier. You don’t have to add the ‘extra’ ingredients but they help to make this a vitamin-packed way to start your day. The Trim Healthy Mama books have a ton of ideas and flavor variations that you could try.

As I sat down to sip coffee and eat my oatmeal I worked on my email tasks and some other blogging related activities.

I really love looking through some of my old posts like this one HERE.

One of those involved me checking my Pinterest account so I could post a few recent blog posts to some boards. Well, while I was there I got distracted and starting pinning and then decided to check my notifications.

I have had quite a few new followers and decided to go ahead and follow them back like the good ‘Pinner’ I am. I also noticed a few more boards that I wanted to follow… you can probably guess what happened next…

Suspended from Pinterest?!

Everyone keeps joking that Pinterest is gonna ban me because I get so carried away pinning sometimes but I never really thought it would happen. I guess it was a reality as I found myself SUSPENDED!

Yep, I’ve been an avid Pinterest fan for over 8 or 9 years… maybe longer, maybe since they started… and I’ve never been suspended. Leave it to me to do get banned or suspended from Pinterest though.

Thankfully they have since fixed my account and said it was ‘mistakenly deactivated‘… Whew! I thought I had lost EVERYTHING and gosh knows I don’t have enough time in my days to go back and try to find all those wonderful things I’ve pinned to all of my boards.

The most HORRIBLE thing about this is that I lost ALL OF MY FOLLOWERS!!!! If you are on Pinterest please look me up and follow me again… thank you!

After reading a little more about this I realize it may have been because I had recently signed up for a trial with Coscheduler… maybe I actually was pinning too much between my manual pins and the ‘scheduled pins’? I have since ended my trial and don’t plan on purchasing.

After that scare, I figured that I should probably try and get to something a little more productive like homeschooling but I really had to PEE!

What didn’t I look before I sat down?

I went to our one little bathroom the moment I saw it was empty. I noticed that it wasn’t the only thing empty though.

Why is this such a hard thing to do?

First things first, I still had to pee and I was in a hurry so I didn’t check before I sat down…

Ewww… what did I just sit in?

If you’re a Momma of boys then you know that it is not a good thing to sit on a wet toilet seat. Luckily it seems that someone had just been playing with water and since the bathroom is so small the water had gotten EVERYWHERE.

Needless to say, I wasn’t a very happy Momma and this little experience prompted me to lead a quick bathroom training which involved:

Making sure EVERYONE knows to check the toilet seat and to wipe it if you make a MESS

Making sure EVERYONE knows how to change an empty toilet paper roll

Now they have NO EXCUSES… this doesn’t mean that I don’t expect I will always find a clean toilet seat and toilet paper but it should help a lot.

Next will be to show them ALL how to clean the bathroom with our new cleaning products!

Now we need to finish up our regularly scheduled school work and get on with our day which may include a NAP for me as I am already exhausted… What a day!

Did you notice our cute Dragon in the bathroom? Get yours HERE.

Oh, What a day! Freezer meals, Pinterest Suspension, and No Toilet Paper Oh my goodness, what a day I've had and it isn't even been lunchtime yet. I actually went to bed early last night as I was just so exhausted.

#norwexconsultant #change the roll #freezer cooking #homeschool #life skills #no excuses #no toilet paper #pinterest suspension

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hotdogwithablog · 5 years

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04.17.2019

Welp, at least we’re here now lol. I’ve been studying a lot but I’ve also been procrastinating with other apps srry. So yea my b. But yeah. The sidewalk construction thing was finally done so when I got up to the bus stop I just had to wait for the bus and not bust a mission down to the other stop lol. For the past few days I had been getting to my usual stop and then there were construction signs and cones blocking the stop, so I knew the bus would just pass me lmao so I had been walking down to the part we’re the sidewalk was blocked, crossing this thick ass street, walking down that side all the way to the light and then crossing. Tbh it was fine, it just wasn’t fine the first time bc I hadn’t planned on doing all of that and I thought I wouldn’t make it so I got stuck walking on a street divider for a bit lol I eventually made it but I was like damn, all of that. But yea I didn’t have to do that today so that was cool. I finally went grocery shopping the other day and that was cool bc I have food now lol I’ve also been eating the meat and beans my sister gave me a while back (they were in the freezer) and I these cute little “street taco” tortillas so I’ve had meat tacos and then bean/cheese tacos for the past few days lol it’s chill though, they’re good and I don’t have to make food. I also packed some for tomorrow! I heat up the tortillas on this flat pan thing with coconut oil and salt, while I warm up the beans, then I take a tortilla (slightly burn my hand) and slap some beans on there and then put some tobasco and then wrap then foil. They’re hella cute and tasty. When I first started making them with the meat and stuff, I realized how much my latin-ness was showing. I could eat tacos for any meal of the day and for days in a row lmao I just need some hot sauce and yea I’m good. But yea. Also I took a thick nap today of at least an hour maybe two. Idk I just get like really tired sometimes and my eyes feel heavy and I just wanna sleep. I probably shouldn’t but yolo and then I use that as an excuse to stay up late and do homework lol so I guess it works out sort of. Ok yea cool. Also on my way home there was hella tree debris on the sidewalk so I asked the construction guy if it was blocking the whole path (so I could just go around, tbh idk why I said it like that) either way he said he could just move it. Yea that story was pointless but idk it was an interaction I guess I wasn’t expecting. I thought he’d say yea it’s in the way and that’s it or say some sexist crap at me but he was normal, wild right. Sorry that’s bad but like construction workers have a bad rep (mostly justified). Cool and yea after that was when I got home and konked. Unless I made the food first?? Oh well let’s see what pics we have to look at:

My hair! So yea I’ve been messing around with clips and ponytail things. I have thick/curly hair so I can’t ever really just leave it down. So yea I did that and you can see my waterpik and part of my Dunder mifflin shirt; it’s a solid shirt

The second pic is from OH with my professor. Some guy had a question about our project ad this was some of the stuff the professor talked about so I took a pic and yea now it’s here

Lmao the kid and Thomas pic. I think I found this on reddit, idk man but it was funny lol

Lol the mom taking you home meme. I don’t remember his name but I think he dated Ariana grande. Anyway this pic was funny as heck so I had to save it

This 5th pic lmao it’s the entrance to the building where my bio lab is. It’s so mice of them to label the thing that isn’t a door so people don’t run into it or try to open it lol

Ah this code. It’s a pic of some code that I changed and then used for my code when I had to make the triangle and rotate it. I might’ve already posted that pic or talked about the triangle thing. It’s okay tho lol bc it’s here again (or not again if I never posted it)

Uhh I’m doing this on my study break again so yea I’m gonna waste some time on other apps for a bit and then finish my hw and stuff

Ok byeeeee

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idkjustastesgood · 7 years

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El Patron review

Looking for ‘authentic’ Mexican food in Albany, New York is like looking for ‘authentic’ New England food in California – it’s probably there somewhere, but good luck finding it.

I’ve been eating some form of “Mexican food” since I was little, but it was about as complex as the “Italian food” my Mom used to make with a box of pasta, a jar of marinara or pesto sauce, and a tupperware of shredded parmesan cheese. No offense to my mother – she’s a great cook – but just like it’s easy to grow up here in suburbia thinking that tomato sauce + noodles = Italian food, it’s similarly easy to believe that beans + salsa + tortilla+ maybe rice and ground beef = Mexican food, or at least that it = tacos.

Since my newest special interest – food and cooking – came down the pipeline, and really ever since my first meal at Albany’s El Mariachi to some extent, I’ve been rethinking that idea. At El Mariachi I first learned about tamales, mole, and salsa verde. I also gained a deep appreciation for flan as the ideal post-Mexican-food dessert (apologies to churro and dulce de leche fans). To me, El Mariachi is a shadow of its old self, although I’d still like to go back sometime, if only to see whether it’s begun to approach my memories of it yet. I’d also be interested to see what else besides burritos is on its menu, now that my Mexican food tastes have expanded a bit.

I keep searching for a replacement for El Mariachi in my heart, and I still haven’t found one, but as far as good Mexican food in Albany goes, El Patronmight come close.

The interior of El Patron is almost kitschily Mexican, with carved and colorfully painted wooden booths and chairs and plenty of stained glass, which is an aesthetic I actually enjoy. The air conditioning was either too low or on the fritz, which might be something to fix as summer in Albany heats up.

If I could “Brad Johnson” this review for a minute, the one downside to the food itself was probably the chips and salsa. The chips were warm, but could have been saltier. The salsa just tasted like tomato salsa from a jar, maybe medium or a spicier mild, but still unremarkable. I understand not wanting to spend much effort on what’s basically the bread basket before the actual meal, and it wouldn’t stop me from coming back at all, but a more interesting salsa, maybe the option of verde as well as rojo, as El Mariachi has, would have been fun.

One of the “green flags” about El Patron’s menu, as compared to some other upstate Mexican eateries I’ve seen, is the lack of pick-and-mix-ness in its tacos, burritos, and tamales. There are some combination plates available, but instead of “any taco/burrito/tamale with any meat inside,” or similar variations, there were actual taco-plate entrees, like the Baja Tacos (chicken with cheese and guacamole, and pico de gallo on the side, as well as the obligatory rice and refried beans). I could recognize the names of dishes I’d read about on food blogs like Bill Esparza’s, from tacos de carbon (the amount of Spanish on the menu also struck me as a positive sign) to flautas de papas on the vegetarian/vegan pages of the menu. I had just recently read about flautas de papas as a dish at the time, and being the potato fanatic that I am, I was seriously tempted. Due to the evening’s 90-degree heat, I decided against a dish heavy on starch (and heavy, period), but I still hope to go back and get my flautas.

Another positive sign on the El Patron menu is dishes that don’t fall into the standard Mexican-American “taco-burrito-tamale-chimichanga” formula. Although I didn’t personally catch any mole on the menu (and it may have been there and I just missed it), I noticed on the seafood portion of the menu in particular a number of entrees served sans tortillas, over rice, with ingredients like garlic sauce and pineapple. When you think about the Chipotle, Moe’s, and Taco Bell-based image of most Mexican food, allowing dishes that go against that image and seem at least halfway authentic on your menu seems ballsy, and reminded me pleasantly of El Mariachi’s dinner-entree-filled menu and white tablecloths, cloth napkins, and stemmed water glasses.

I’ve had a taste for shellfish lately, which manifests itself as cravings for either sushi or shrimp, and I tried the shrimp tacos. This was a very good decision, if not particularly adventurous. Unlike the other shrimp tacos I had recently, at Pancho’s Authentic Mexican Restaurant in Troy, the queso fresco in these was melted, and added richness, rather than a weird moment of “who put shredded pizza cheese blend in my shrimp?” The shrimp itself was cooked beautifully, still very juicy in the soft tortillas, although it probably could have had a little more of a kick. At the same time, I could taste the shrimp meat itself, which was satisfying. In addition, I was provided with some very nice pico de gallo on the side (which I prefer to red salsa personally), as well as a sauce that I can’t identify, except that it looked like some kind of balsamic vinaigrette but wasn’t, and appeared to have some peppers and mustard seeds in it. I poured a bit of both condiments on my tacos and found that the mustard seed sauce had a slow burn kind of spice to it, adding a refreshing note to the tacos, which the cheese began to make almost a little too rich. The rice and beans were tasty, with a little kick that’s unusual but pleasant for rice and refried beans (even though I tend to like whole black beans better than refried).

Unfortunately, we didn’t get to try the flan, because it took so long to get the check that we couldn’t imagine waiting even longer for dessert. The service was slow and a bit lackluster, even though we were almost the only ones at the restaurant. Still, no one was actively rude to us, and the server took the hint and brought us to-go containers for our rice and beans (good rice and beans is hard to find; I also brought the rest of my pico de gallo home) promptly after he saw us looking over at him while he put things away in a reach-in freezer and hung out with a coworker by the kitchen door.

Part of my love of El Mariachi stems from nostalgia, and no other restaurant will ever approach it on those terms. However, El Patron also doesn’t quite challenge it as a restaurant, at least not yet. Still, I plan to go back to El Patron to sample more of its menu, and if you’re looking for what quality Mexican food upstate New York can provide, this is definitely a great place to go.

(on my blog)

#el patron #el patron albany #albany ny #food review #food blog #original #writing

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myswimmingcollectorkittystu-blog · 6 years

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Learn how to Eat Gluten-Free At IHOP

Methods to Eat Gluten-Free At IHOP

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hereitalkonandon · 5 years

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I told you in my first letter that I didn't eat meat or dairy, only because it was really important to me, but I wasn't expecting you to remember, it was also just a sentence or two. And I really didn't think you would answer with a long letter, just probably say something about feeling relieved and that it didn't look like I was someone that actually knew you in real life or something.

I didn't say I stay away from most foods, though. I eat bread and pasta too, I eat everything that has nothing to do with animals. Yesterday I actually made pasta because it was this small package and yet it was over 800 calories, I only used mushrooms and this 450 grams jar of tomato sauce.

If I feel like it I will make spaghetti today. I've decided to try to eat a lot of pasta while I'm here, since it's fattening. What I meant is that if I wanted to eat a lot of calories I couldn't just do it with a jar of peanut butter a day or something similar, a week would be fine, but if I tried to keep that up it would be way too much fat for my heart no matter how healthy I was. Three spoons a day would probably be healthy, but that's not even 300 calories. And that other than that most fattening foods have something to do with animals.

I also eat anything unhealthy that I feel like having, but really, without cheese, is there any tasty junk food left? I loved cheese so much. I don't miss it because I know that most cows go through hell. But I loved it, that was the thing that I ate the most, chocolate milk too, but cheese was beautiful, and there are so many types.

Then I also ate enough butter. Now I try to compensate with potatoes, they are great too. I had some pizzas made with potato cheese and they were great, it tasted like real cheese, sort of like cream cheese but the texture was like mozzarella. But there are probably a lot of awful potato cheeses out there. And that's the only fake cheese I've had.

I used to eat Mexican food at least twice a week, I never liked it that spicy and I used a lot of cheese and sour cream, it's good, it depends, I don’t like all the dishes.

Obviously they make a lot of awful stuff and call it Mexican food, but I feel like Taco Bell is probably decent even if it's not the real thing, I just never got to try it. It looks like junk food, that's why I assume it should be good. I loved junk food, I still would.

I don't care for jalapeños though, only when you can't see them, when they mix them with nacho cheese. Not that I have nacho cheese anymore, and nacho cheese is actually American of course.

Before I dropped dairy my favorite foods were Mexican, Italian, and also burgers and Mac and Cheese, many things that Americans love, now I can't tell, I would probably say "potato."

I often eat bananas, beans, avocados, mushrooms, bread, tortillas, either made from corn or flour, sometimes soy chorizo. It's this sort of meat, but fake, obviously. It has always been so common here, though, you can get it made from pork or from soy in every store. I guess it's that common because of pork allergies or something, it tastes the same as the one made from pork, probably because it has a lot of condiments.

And they make tacos out of everything but the best were the ones made with adobada, which is pork too, it looks red because of how they prepare it. Anyway, I sometimes make tacos with soy chorizo, they taste the same.

I remember that Victor liked Mexican food too, and yesterday I thought that, though I don't feel like I would have wished my ex-girlfriend ill or hated her if my break up had happened back when I was Victor's age, since we had some fights back then and I never behaved like that, maybe he wouldn't have behaved like that if your break up had happened when he was 24. It also didn't speak more badly of him than of most men, I know most men and even women behave just like him after a break up no matter how old they are.

But until yesterday I wasn't thinking of Victor's age at all, as I've said, not that it was an excuse, but he was too young. It also surprised me when he behaved like that because even if he was sort of basic, he wasn't like most men, in the sense that he was too sensitive, and genuinely respectful of women. I wasn't expecting something that hateful from him.

I sort of probably read the whole story about that one girl, and even more now that I saw a lot of your old posts, from back when he was still with you, I assumed she was the same girl. I never sent you any anons about her, I read two anons or so, trying to be helpful, and after your break up I saw his cheesy posts too, just didn't know she was Irish or anything.

Oh, I hadn't even read the part where you mention his age too when I talked about it. I just don't see why people cheat, because if it gets to the point where you want to try something with someone else then you should just break up and be honest, like the stupid thing my ex-girlfriend did, which I think was awful but it was the best way to go about it if she was going to sleep with him no matter what.

I know they do it because they are not sure that the relationship is over, but I don't see how they can convince themselves that they have the right to deceive the other person. I understand that Victor threatening to kill himself was also a factor, I never did that because, what’s the point, first of all, I have never liked lying, but even if I did, I wanted her to be with me because she wanted to.

Since you said you wouldn't cheat on your boyfriend, that at least not now. I don't really see any reason to do that ever, it was enough with Victor, I understand why people make a mistake but not why they keep repeating it. Maybe you can't help it though, that you can't be sure that you would do the right thing in two or five years. I just don't understand it, but I'm not asking you to explain yourself either.

You talked about having no respect for Victor, but I was always surprised that you could even be attracted to him because of his personality, to me it was like being attracted to a child, other than his looks, he actually looked older than he was. So I understand what you said even if it doesn't excuse cheating, but you have also said that yourself.

Even if I don't know anything about poetry, art is about whatever you want it to be, as long as something it's good I don't think it should be annoying because of the topic, unless it's racist or inappropriate. And I also believe that bad art shouldn't be annoying either, maybe other three people would like it too, and just the fact that the artist liked it should be enough. I don't like it when people laugh at someone else's art. Since art shouldn't be about money then just the fact that someone enjoys it whether they are good or bad at it it's fine.

Not that art that is about money is necessarily bad, a lot of great TV Shows and books were made thinking only of the money. So it really doesn't make sense to me that some would find people making art about themselves annoying. But it wouldn't surprise me. People tend to find anything self-centered annoying too. I've never understood, as long as you are being respectful they shouldn't care.

They don't care with me, since I'm respectful. But I always see people complaining about those who aren't humble, and praising humble people. Why care about how high someone’s opinion of himself is, that seems like such a stupid thing to worry about. I couldn’t care less if someone else thinks he is a god as long as he is respectful and as long as he doesn’t want me to say he is superior to me. Yet I would feel like slapping someone if they listed humbleness as one of their virtues. So you don’t think you are a big deal, but you think that’s some big deal, please release me.

I've read that about Cleopatra but not with your words so it was good to read your version, other than that and what little I watched in Rome I don't know that much about her. But when it comes to her it makes sense, assuming what they say is true, she wasn't betraying him over nothing, most people would put their children's lives over everything else. So if most women had to choose and they thought it was a good idea, they would sacrifice their husbands too even if it was true love.

I would never do that and that's why I know I shouldn't have any children and I won't. I would never sacrifice my wife for my children, and I would always think that my wife is more important, even if I can’t know if I would sacrifice my children for my wife, but I probably would.

I wouldn’t sacrifice my dog for my wife though, but it’s different, he wouldn’t understand and he would feel betrayed, he is a dog, maybe the child would since he would love his mother and I would dare then.

That’s sort of why I said you definitely wouldn’t murder Cersei, in some anon, though maybe you would. She is not a dog, but she is so arrogant and selfish she wouldn’t be able to understand, no matter how paranoid she is, at least that’s the way I feel when it comes to her. So if I actually knew her and cared for her and had to murder a few people she would never be an option even if I cared for the other people just as much. I personally would be sure that she would be incapable of understanding why someone needed to sacrifice her, why someone would choose not to murder other people before touching her, she’s so immature, I wouldn’t want her to die feeling so desperate, angry, and shocked.

I never expect you to remember anything I say, and I repeat this, there's nothing wrong with that, I’ve a great memory, but that’s me. My grandma always says so and she always forgets everything I say, my mom forgets most things too. Lately my whole brain has been affected, including my memory, because I don’t sleep. I also don’t interact with anyone other than my family and my dog.

But I've talked about my journals enough times, I bring it up so you don't think I'm just saying that, now that you ask, not that you were judging me because of it, I know you weren't, but it's not something I'm doing, keeping some journal about you.

About how I've always wanted to keep a journal but felt that I didn't have much to write even if I talk a lot, but that once I started back in August of 2017 I've actually somehow filled a lot of notebooks.

So I don't write our conversations because they are too long and I don't know how long they could get or if they will stop soon too, since copying them would take a lot of time I'm not currently doing that. As I told you yesterday.

But ever since I started my journals I wrote whatever anon I sent you and the answer, and I do that whenever I talk to someone over the internet or send a text message, since I barely do it, otherwise it would be impossible to keep that up. But not with my friend, she annoys me, I don't think I've ever mentioned her in my journals, and not with the man that I sometimes write to.

Two weeks ago or so I sent this girl some information about tags, we had never talked before and that was the only time, because it looked like she didn't know that only the first five tags show up, at least if you are not using some extension and I don't use any, and she would often write the most important tags at the very end. I had wanted to do it for a long while, but one day I suddenly decided it would be a good idea, at first I kept wondering if she was aware and she didn't care. I think she actually cared, but whatever it was she answered that she didn't already know it. I wrote that in my journals too.

I write about trying a new brand of bread also, or about somehow finding something I’ve always eaten tastier than usual or about eating something for the first time in years, I write about how much I want my neighbors to rot in hell. I’ve always just loved words and writing with my hand, keyboards too though, but never fiction, just my thoughts. One day I noticed my reflection while washing my hands, it was some jar made of metal, I liked the angle, it was odd, I wrote about it too.

And I'm not a good writer, talk a lot, (with my mouth too whenever I have the chance) and keep repeating myself, in my journals I do nothing to avoid repeating myself, I enjoy it, they are still words.

I like to paste stuff on them and I also write whatever quote I like or lyrics. I haven't skipped a single day ever since I started, sometimes it's just a sentence, but I still write a lot of pages when I feel like it, I used to write in my journals even more before I started writing to you.

I just remembered that since the first journal I started was thick you actually got to appear there, I was still using that one after your break up, I started it on August 27/28. I remember I had just watched the latest episode of Game of Thrones that has aired, less than 24 hours before I started it and the first thing I wrote about was that episode.

I was mostly avoiding you back then though because you love jumping to conclusions, and spoilers, (I never forgot that one Kylo picture that someone somehow managed to believe it was Finn’s chest though it was clearly Kylo’s, I wasn’t even wondering about it and never did, I was surprised when I saw that post, that there was any doubt about it, so it stayed with me forever, not that the scene was what the trailer made it look like anyway, well it was, but Rey says that one line to Luke) I’m afraid of spoilers. So I also was avoiding you once The Last Jedi was close enough. The Last Jedi is my favorite movie ever which speaks so much about how I have barely watched any movies at all.

Back in 2013 I had this thing called Ask.fm, I only sent questions to myself, sometimes my friend asked me things too, she also made one, I wrote enough things there, and once in a while I visit and I copy whatever I like in my journal, I want to eventually copy everything that I find interesting from that account.

I would like to do that with my Facebook too, the one I had when I was with my ex-girlfriend, which is always deactivated, I only activate it every five months or so, to see it's still there.

And I want to copy her Last.fm and have already written some pages down, (the fact that both pages end with “.fm” is just some dumb coincidence) it's way too long though, and so is the stuff from Facebook.

Our MSN/Skype conversations (I only have the ones after 2009, but sadly we broke up for some months and I deleted the ones from the start of our relationship since I thought it was over, and then I was way too young to know a thing about keeping memories when we were friends back in 2005 so I have nothing) are even longer and I would copy most of them, but maybe the conversations would be too much, I don’t know how many books. So I don't know, sometimes I think I should wait and see if I get over that relationship in a year or two and save myself the trouble.

When it comes to triggers though, no one can really do that, but since you ask, just don't say anything sad about animals, I guess, it makes me extremely sad, I feel something in my chest for weeks whenever I accidentally read something bad that happened to an animal, luckily it goes away eventually, but it lasts for a long time.

My mom's boyfriend isn't really patient and he is often stressed, he doesn’t have anxiety or anything, he is just a moron. But he is also like your description of a dog, he is pretty lazy and doesn't care about anything, but watches action movies and plays games on his phone, he hates reading, he likes soccer too, like a dog chasing a ball, he barely sees my mom, can go weeks without seeing her for something other than leaving her some envelope with money under the door, sometimes even months. He is definitely not asexual but he is likely not an average person when it comes to sex, he even once told my mom that he liked sex but that he had never been crazy about it. He is pretty odd when it comes to everything, actually, not just sex.

Back when the Pokemon app was really popular he was catching Pokemon at the beach. He isn’t childish though, his friends call him “uncle” because he acts like an old man. And he probably doesn't care that much about children either, but whenever he visited my mom's family, the boys would kick him and punch him and he would just sit there and not say anything. One time one of the boys even told him, not angry, wanting to play with him "come here, come so I can hit you" and he was about to get up and allow himself to be kicked but his mother heard him and told him to stop.

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linakay · 6 years

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Dear You,

The amount of love that I was shown in Guadalajara was truly breathtaking. It came in swiftly as a force to say, “Celina. For this time, you are meant to be here.” Things just seemed to line up so perfectly. That’s not to say that this trip was without its lonely, challenging, and scary moments. But the bright moments shined through the haziness of the trying ones. When I so earnestly desired a friend, I looked up to find one placed before me just as I felt defeat, through classmates, strangers, even Uber drivers. There was always a new area to explore, a kindred eye, or secret knowledge waiting to be discovered. And this is all is precisely what made me fall in love so deeply with the city, with my life there. I will always hold the memories that I created sweetly in my heart. I wish that I could share every experience with you. Show you all of the colorful images in my mind. Let you taste the food and compassion, inhale the fragrant streets after the thunderstorms, and show you all around my little world. Unfortunately, that’s impossible. So for now, I am so excited to take you on a small part of my journey by sharing the things that stood out to me most.

Food

Of course, eating all of the different foods was one of the most memorable experiences of my time in Mexico. My host mom, A, couldn’t have been a better cook. One tip, if you are offered food or drink from a trusted Mexican friend, just accept their gift and kindness. Your “no, gracias” will not go very far before you are consuming the goodie and you will feel rude for refusing, so you may as well save your breath and enjoy whatever treat is in store for you. Many of my partaking of meals were spent with my host family. Eggs, cheese, beans, breads, pastries, salsas, fresh tortillas, delicious fruit, rich meats, aguas frescas. All of these and more were staples of my meal times spent in Guadalajara. From the traditional dishes of tortas ahogadas and carnes en su jugo to the freshest of quesadillas, I was very rarely hungry. And you know that this is saying quite a lot! My snacking days were scarcely encountered, as my tummy was always warm and full.

I visited many restaurants that were all so beautiful in their own way, from street foods to upper scale dining, I couldn’t help but fall in love. Lively colors were always scattered within the walls of the restaurants and flora scampered along throughout the confines of the spaces. One of my favorite restaurants sits in the middle of Tlaquepaque. A vibrant little city sitting right next to Guadalajara, full of historical buildings, art, handmade crafts, cuisine, and endless shops filled with Mexican delicacies. Casa Luna was the first restaurant that I ventured into with the kindest of friends. It was brimming with colorfully decorated trees and art-filled walls. Live music from a little quartet wafted through the air as I tasted the exquisite flavors of the food before me. I was so happy to be there.

Beautiful Casa Luna

A sope with a twist!

Tortillas to die for with every meal!

Dying for the colors ❤

Nieve de Garrafa. Another speciality!

Street tacos for the win!

A traditional Jaliscan goat dish! So tasty!

Torta Ahogada ~ A speciality of GDL! One of my favorite homemade meals 🙂

Mmmm. Tejuino! So tasty!

The restaurants were all so unique!

People

The people! Oh, the wonderful people that I encountered! My host family brought so much joy into my days in the city. They took care of me as if I was their own and that was such a humbling experience. One of the most beautiful things that I was able to observe of Mexican culture is the hospitality and warmth that is so freely offered. From kind souls on the streets to the ones who felt like home, I was embraced with a pressing tenderness that I hadn’t quite experienced before. Of course, I have been gifted an abundance of kindness in my home ever since I was young. It is simply that there is a powerful sense of community and unity in Mexico that you can’t help but stumble over and fully immerse yourself in. I was a stranger suddenly placed before them. Yet, my host family, their relatives, my teachers, Uber drivers, 7/11 employees, street vendors, bus waiters (You name it!), never once treated me as an outsider. And this is something that I think each and every one of us should fully let sink in. Generosity without hesitation. Instead of isolating me, they swiftly invited me into their world and led me into a beautiful dance that full of life, contentment, uncertainty, and passion.

Hanging in the Canals of Xochimilco

The sweetest souls! H & H

Last day of class with my teacher, R and a few classmates

C and I in Tlaquepaque. A kindred spirit

Looking out over Barranca Huentitan with good friends

Mall outing with my host mom, A, and her daughter 🙂

Mexico City Tour

FAMILY

My Mexico City Group

Museums & Monuments & Magic Moments

From pyramids to giant rollercoasters, I was enormously privileged to have the opportunity to soak up areas with incredible history. Visiting the pyramids of Teotihuacan was one of the most breathtaking of experiences of my life. While only being able to understand bits and pieces from our Spanish speaking tour guides, I was still able to fully imagine the brutal and spectacular ancient and Aztec civilizations that once populated the plains that are now scattered in mysterious ruins. Climbing to the top of the pyramid of the sun and the pyramid of the moon still brings a rush to my heart and a smile to my face as I write to you now.

Mexico City’s Museo Soumaya is a huge art museum encompassed by a gorgeously crafted metal-tiled building. The shinning building twinkles in the sunlight and draws you in to experience the many white floors filled with fine art and artifacts from all over Europe and Asia. Hospicio Cabañas is another art museum that lies right next to El Centro de Guadalajara, which is a cultural explosion of markets, pigeons, food, jewelry, clothing, trinkets, music, glorious buildings and more. The music, which features the works of José Clemente Orozco, was once a hospital and still carries the solemnly stoic essence of just that. I visited this museum by myself one day in an effort to lose myself in the city and I must say that I was often spooked by the haunting beauty of this site. But then again, I am a gentle soul with a wild imagination.

The National Museum of Anthropology, Los Niños Héroes, El Bosque de los Colomos, la Barranca de Oblatos, even the zoo with the cutest squirrel monkeys running wild and free! So many sites observed, history absorbed, and thoughts captured. I wouldn’t change any part of my journey to and from this diverse city.

On top of el piramde del sol overlooking el piramde de la luna

Jose Clemete Orozco Murals

The Palace of the Jaguars, Teotihuacan

Museo Soumaya

Pyramid of the Sun

Ruins of Templo Mayor

Remains of Templo Mayor

Los Niños Héroes

Notes of Culture

The biggest cultural shock that I experienced was of how so much of life in the country occur at later hours than in my area of the United States. Meal times are later, lunch breaks are longer, and it is common for many to spend the late hours of the night communing with friends and loved ones over music, laughter, and yes, more food. This took some time for me to adapt to. My body had to adapt to the later meal times, and my deep grandma spirit had to let loose and stay up past 11 PM on some nights. Of course, I wasn’t forced to stay out late in family gatherings, but I sure would have missed out on many wonderful encounters, friendships made, and a lot of laughter.

Pedestrian laws are sketchy, to say the least, and the streets and bus rides were always an adventure of rushing, staying vigilant as to not miss your stop, and witnessing the fascinating peculiarities of residents’ passions and lives. Still, through getting lost and regaining direction, through the mispronounced words and moments of isolation, I always felt safe. The people were modest, amiable, honest, and just plain fun. Although I am so beyond thankful to now be home and to be able to share these memories with you, I still miss the thunderstorms that would suddenly awaken me in the wee hours of the night. That would dare me to glance through my window and see the dark and angry skies glistening with lightning. I miss having the opportunity to learn something new and extraordinary every single day. But I know that I will one day return. I know that I will forever cherish the land that I have walked through dearly in my heart. And I know that I will always be grateful for the first city that has opened my eyes to the infinite world around me.

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The National Museum of Anthropology

Universidad Autónoma de Guadalajara

Japanese Tea Garden

El Bosque de los Colomos

A cleansing ritual in the middle of Mexico City

Murals along Xochimilco

There and Back Again: What One May Expect

It was ridiculous. I had been dreaming of this for months, yet that morning all I wanted to do was return home. I felt like a zombie walking aboard that plane. Emotionless, and still feeling every emotion possible as my body went ahead, leaving my mind two seconds behind. Of course, I knew that excitement was down there somewhere, buried beneath the shadow of uneasiness and doubt. The cloud was just growing heavy. Yet, I still found a way to push my feet of lead forward. My body powered through with a force that my mind was unaware of and I made my way through to the city and my temporary home.

By the time I arrived, I felt gross from the plane and really just wanted to hide in my room and melt in my missing of everyone back home. But my host family kindly and strongly insisted that I eat and then see around the neighborhood. “Ven, Celina!” my host dad, M, kept calling to me, as I followed him around the crazy streets of the beautiful city. I was trying so hard to capture every word he spoke to me in the hazy and surreal moments as he pointed around to the sites. I had finally made it. I’m grateful for the moments that he captured as I reluctantly posed around these beautiful monuments messy and burning up in my jacket.

The excitement and nerves continued to course through my blood as I began my classes at Universidad Autónoma de Guadalajara and met classmates from different parts of the world. We were all scared to a certain degree, living away from home, trying to learn a new language and adapt to a foreign culture. At first, the days were packed and the nights were lonely. But then something clicked within me. I began to walk forward briskly and then run and then skip my way forward around the city. I embraced the mistakes. Every fumbled and mispronounced word. Every wrong bus route taken. I kept moving forward. Silencing the little shutters of fears that repeatedly attempted to break their way into my reality.

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Plaza Tapatia in El Centro

Teatro Degollado in El Centro

La Barranca de Huentitán

Hospicio Cabañas

Slowly and then all at once, I began to fall for the city. The language became a challenge to be accepted head on instead of a barrier. The craziness that overwhelmed me became the hidden beauty instead of a scary monster. With time, the foreign bed began to feel like a home and the strangers became family. And my heart was warmed by the endless adventures that hid with anticipation down each crowded street. This was meant to be and I wasted no time wondering, I just leapt in.

And then all at once, it was time to return home. It was time to say, “I hope to see you one day soon! Let’s keep in touch,” to previously unknown people who had become the jewels of my support system. Those last few days, I tried not to think about my return and to continue to soak up the time remaining. I rejected the ideas of going home in my heart. It wasn’t time, I wasn’t ready. There was still so much left for me to conquer, so much to learn and see. But my desirous heart could not hinder that plane from arriving. So I took a deep breath and tried to trust that home would feel like home once again. And truthfully, it did. In the grand scheme of things, a month away occurs within the blink of an eye. And even though I miss my darling Perla Tapatía, I am meant to be home. For I have learned more of what I love, more of what I despise, and I only hope that I can use the gained understanding of myself, of others, and of life for the good of those around me. I will tell you that there is a bravery inside me that I knew existed but couldn’t seem to find. I’ve unlocked it and I can’t wait to see and share just where it takes me.

Con Amor,

Celina Kay

Palacio de Bellas Artes, Mexico City

El Catedral en El Central

Teotihuacan

Jocotepec

La Perla Tapatía Dear You, The amount of love that I was shown in Guadalajara was truly breathtaking. It came in swiftly as a force to say, "Celina.

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benjamingarden · 6 years

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A Year Of Eating Locally Meal Plan + Food Costs - week of July 22, 2018

our new kitchen minus the cabinets

I shared, some time ago, that I eliminated all dairy products from my diet because I'd heard (time and time again) that dairy could be contributing to my ongoing seasonal allergy pain and symptoms. I ignored the advice (I mean who can give up cheese????) until finally I was so sick for three months that I waved the white flag and decided to try it. For 30 days. On day 25 I was still not noticing much relief and could not wait to have cheese again in five days. And then day 28 rolled around and it happened. I felt much less congested, my head was clear, and the mucous was minimal. And then I had to figure out how in the world I was going to adopt this lifestyle for good. It's been challenging, but worth it. While dairy elimination hasn't completely alleviated sinusitis or seasonal allergy flare-ups, it has absolutely toned down the issues related and has made it all very manageable. That being said, I still get headaches with changes in barometric pressure, and I still have days when the pollen and/or mold count are high, that I am in pain. We can't sleep with the windows open or I am a congested mess in the mornings. I've heard, for the past couple of years, from different sources, that eliminating nightshades completely from your diet would help alleviate seasonal allergy issues. So I go back to my dairy dilemma of giving up cheese.....who can give up peppers, potatoes, and in-season FRESH tomatoes??? Well, I did. I couldn't take it anymore and last week I altered my meal plan to completely eliminate all nightshades. My goodness is it hard. I think it's actually more difficult than dairy. It's so easy to reach for tomatoes (sauce, crushed, fresh, etc.), or peppers (including any spices with peppers in the mix) because I cook with them all of the time. And paprika is in EVERYTHING. If something states "spices" I have learned to assume paprika is one of those spices. Well, it seems so many things either include either paprika or "spices". So, I continue to try and figure out my meals minus nightshades. I also, at the exact same time, decided to cut out gluten temporarily because of some digestive issues. Bad move. If I'd been able to eat potatoes it wouldn't have been so hard but without any potatoes, no way. I was so hungry and getting so frustrated as to what I was going to eat that would be fulfilling. Gluten is back in my life (hallelujah!) and all is now well. What does seem to be working, however, is the elimination of nightshades. I really do feel a difference. I'll continue through to a full 30 days to make sure it's not just a coincidence, but I have had no headaches with all of the barometric pressure changes over the past week and I feel really good. Super bad timing, though because the tomatoes in our garden are ripening like crazy and are sooooo delicious! Now J is being force fed them. (joking, of course......kind of....) So, this week's meal plan, for my meals anyway, is a bit of a work-in-progress as I figure it all out. I would love to hear from any of you who have also eliminated nightshades and/or eggs as part of an autoimmune diet.

If you’re just tuning in, this is our 1 year challenge in which I share our weekly meal plan as we try to eat primarily locally grown food. You will see that I often I make 2 different meals because I am primarily plant-based and my husband is not. Most of what we eat is made from scratch and any boxed, canned and/or frozen products follow the Real Food guidelines. Meal planning is my way of controlling the grocery budget (read as a LOT of dollars saved), ensuring there is no food waste for the week, as well as saving time. You can read more about meal planning here.

Read the entire series here.

I purchased peppers from the grocery store to use in J's dishes this week. Ours are still just a tad small and I haven't seen them show up at the farmer's market yet. I have no photos of the veggies I purchased this week. It's been a very rainy, humid, and downright miserable weekend/week so photos did not happen. Instead, I am sharing a photo of my jam-making session part 2. I made blueberry jam and blueberry-maple jam with our berries we picked last week. Note that the doors are removed from our upper cabinets. This is temporary.....I await their painting and return. On to the meal plan! Weekly Meal Plan:

Sunday

Breakfast - Breakfast Tacos

Lunch - Veg & Pasta Salad

Dinner - Squash, Corn & Green Bean Sauté, Mashed Sweet Potatoes, (J) Mississippi Pot Roast

Monday