#i was a foster sibling

[frizzle-mcshizzle]

people don’t realize how well Adoption is written in kotlc

normally in a story like kotlc sophie would be adopted by a nice elf family and would struggle with having a new family for one book tops. then it would be all happy and dandy and her birth family would never be mentioned again because she has her new elf family now and they don’t matter anymore, because they’re not elves.

Sophie lost the family she had her whole life, she chose for them to forget her existence, at twelve (12). and she was sent to live with grieving parents who where probably some of the only people in the lost cities who understand what it was like to lose someone.

Sophie was not only afraid that they would think she was trying to replace their dead daughter but was afraid of replacing for even forgetting her birth family. the Ruewen’s where afraid of getting attached to a another child because what if they lost her too, but they tried to give it a chance because they knew Sophie was hurting.

yes the Ruewens compared Sophie to Jolie and saw her when they looked at Sophie. because of course they did, grieving parents are going to see the child they lost in everything. especially in a little girl who looks so much like the daughter they lost that even she noticed it. it doesn't make them bad parents, it makes them realistic grieving parents.

and when they canceled Sophie’s adoption after she put her life in danger, around fire no less, it made sense. but so did sophie’s reaction, because she had thought these where the people who where going to care for her now, and instead they where sending her away because they where afraid.

The Ruewen’s didn’t realize how much they cared about her until they almost lost her, until they had to go through another planting, until they had to watch her almost fade away, that’s when they realized they loved her.

Keeper ends with Sophie’s adoption, and not only did she get to choose who adopted her but she got to keep her last name, she got to keep apart of her human life her birth family, and still be a Ruewen. that is something that is so important because not a lot of adopted kids get to keep parts of their birth names, it’s kinda uncommon and i love that it was added into Sophie’s adoption. it’s not just forgotten either, it’s brought up multiple times later in the series that she wants to keep her human last name.

but the thing is, they didn’t start acting like a family that had been together their whole lives by the next book, it’s not until Everblaze that they really act like a family. which is so realistic, you don’t start loving someone like your family because paper was signed it takes time to grow that attached to someone if you haven’t had them in your family your whole life.

and her birth family is never forgotten, it’s never considered less of her family now that she has the Ruewen’s, the Ruewen’s are not her human family’s replacement, they’re more people who love her, and that’s how it should be in her situation.

not only that but Sophie is still curious who her bio parents are, not because she doesn’t love the Ruewen’s or her brith family, but because she wants to know where she came from and who she’s related too. which is realistic, it’s something every adopted child does if they don’t remember their bio family.

the only books that i’ve read with adoption written this well, where books that focused on adoption like that was the entire plot, but kotlc has it in the background and it’s so important (and even then a lot of those SUCK). it’s so rare to have a realistic adoption story that that’s just a subplot, and i will never get over the fact that it’s in kotlc

and that’s just Sophie and the Ruewen’s, i haven’t even talked about Tiergan yet.

#and that’s just Sophie and the Ruewens #i haven’t even talked about Tiergan #if you can’t tell i have a lot of experience with adoption #i was a foster sibling #4 out of 5 of my siblings are adopted #my MOM was adopted #kotlc #kotlc sophie #kotlc edaline #keeper of the lost cities #kotlc grady #gradaline #grady ruewen #edaline ruewen #sophie foster

[babacontainsmultitudes]

When you think about it, Nicholas is kind of a build-a-bear situation.

#I like that they're siblings cause they really do just get into the same situations. #dndads #dndads spoilers #dndads s2 ep 51 #dungeons and daddies #nick close #hermie the unworthy #nicky freeman #nick foster #they haunt the narrative your honor

[yesokayiknow]

human au. some of these guys spend too much time on here and it shows

#don't ask how long this took #doctor who #the doctor #the master #i'm not tagging them all. god #nu who doctors & masters & also 8 is there bc he's just a lil guy (and tbf no one can agree which era he belongs to anyway) #fun fact i started making these so long ago that i had to redo the ones i'd done bc tumblr had changed its layout in the intervening time #i don't know 15 well enough yet to make him one but also he's exclusively an insta girlie lbr #or war and fugitive. but i think war doesn't have social media and fugitive's starting stan wars on twitter #jacobi!master is exclusively linkedin #also 10's a horsegirl argue with the wall. he saw barbie twelve times and came away with the wrong message #is there a bg for this au? not really. in my main human au everyone is pretty wild whereas here they're more normal #they're just hangin out here ig. 9-11+14 are siblings. 12+13 are siblings. the two groups + 8 are cousins #saxon & missy are cousins and missy & spymaster are foster siblings #if anyone likes this i'll make one for the companions too. actually i probably still will bc honestly this was really fun & relaxing to mak #but if you see an error in one of these no you didn't. don't point it out to me i'll scream

[finemealprompt]

DP x DC Prompt #22

When Jason Todd had left his little brother to watch his mom while he did a supply run, he wasn't expecting to come back to a bunch of police.

Staying hidden, he learned that his mother had died and his brother had been taken to be put in the foster system. But they were looking for Jason too.

Running away, Jason vowed to find Danny.

But when they're reunited, they've both shared one thing: death.

#finemeal prompt #dp x dc #jason todd #danny fenton #they're brothers #don't mind me just posting a lot of bio bros things between the batfam and danny #it's what's in my head right now i guess #listen #if batman's gonna have a ton of adopted kids with black hair and blue eyes #danny could be their sibling #hell i'll make danny any of their siblings #watch me #i already made him duke's foster bro #i'll make him any batfam member's sibling #if you want a specific sibling lemme know cuz apparently that's what I'm doing rn

[citruscore]

funniest family tree on the podcast easily

#dndads #hermie the unworthy #nick close #nicholas foster #glenn close #jodie foster #scam likely #morgan freeman #taylor swift dndads #cassandra swift #mark likely #dee snider #um. meryl is there kind of. #a lot of this is just nick and hermie. i want to put them in Scenarios. they are so siblings to me

[daphnalia]

HOW DID I NOT KNOW ABOUT THIS ITS TOO FUXKING GOOD

#couldve also been better husband.. #or better father #I HEART THEM #jodie foster and glenn close sibling dynamic you will always me famous #they are so brothera #probably because yk freddie and Jimmy are brothers but you know.. #they are soooo brothers #dndads #dungeons and daddies #glenn close get tf out of my bones challenge #glenn close dndads #jodie foster #this is actually months old but i left it to rot in my ibis drafts #ITS FINALLY GETTING TO SEE THE WORLD!! #please tell me noone has fone tjis #can u twll this drawing took me literally 25 minutes

[softboyshaven]

"What is even the romantic appeal of Julian Blackthorn? He's toxic and possessive and-" Some of y'all have never been traumatized and it shows😭 Maybe some of us like the idea of someone who loves us so much they'd never abandon us.

#julian blackthorn #tsc #the shadowhunter chronicles #the dark artifices #tmi #this is in jest #but i also think the Blackthorns hit different if youve been through shit #like as a kid raised half by an older sibling/half in foster care and then who was the person doing kinship #their family dynamic is unlike anything ive ever seen in the genre #its so good #and real

[agentravensong]

thinking about lex foster.

she has the Gift. she can pull a gun from the void. as a child, she was friends with an eldritch entity. in one timeline, she defeats an avatar/incarnation of another eldritch entity to save her sister.

but, there, that's the thing: lex has a younger sister, who is even more gifted. that sister is the lynchpin of the multiverse. and lex is her protector.

that sister, hannah, is only alive because lex, as a 5 year old, used her Gift to save her from dying before she was born. she didn't even want a sister before that moment. she doesn't remember doing it.

lex wants to be a normal teen who can hang out with her boyfriend and do stupid teen stuff. compared to hannah, she's grounded, practical. she forgets her own power, her own potential, as she grows up and has to learn to fight and scavenge to survive. but at heart, she's still a dreamer. she doesn't want anyone's pity, but still believes (wants to believe) in angels. if she had the money, she'd take the three of them to california. she'd be an actress.

her sister sometimes makes her life hell. lex will still risk, give up, anything and everything for that sister. she's been the closest thing to a mother hannah has known. but she's far from perfect. in multiple timelines, she's the cause of hannah's hurt, the one who puts her in the path of danger, however unintentionally. there is a gap in understanding between her and hannah that they may never fully close — but she keeps reaching out, keeps trying to work around it.

when lex is about to die in black friday, she wonders if she, all along, needed her sister more than her sister needed her — or maybe that's just her trying to reassure herself in her final moments, hoping beyond hope that hannah will be okay without her.

lex has the Gift. but she's not webby's favorite. she's not the Hero. her little sister is.

was lex meant to be the hero, originally? did she somehow fail in webby or the greater universe's eyes to live up to that position, requiring that her sister take it up instead? dooming hannah, before she was even born, to bearing the burden of being the one targeted by the most sinister forces in the multiverse, again and again, and the responsibility of stopping it?

or was the purpose of lex's existence always for her to be her sister's caretaker? to ensure that hannah could fulfill her destiny? to be the one to save her, from others or herself? through taking action, realizing her potential as the second-strongest foster girl (yellow jacket) or less directly, through just being someone hannah knows, can count on and believe in (witch in the web)? to play the kind of supportive role women are often pigeonholed into?

was hannah always meant to be the special one, the star, with lex as her prologue (and occasional understudy)? or was lex the original choice for the role, only for her to turn out to be... not enough? leaving hannah with the job of weaving together the pieces of a shattered universe?

either way, lex foster's existence is defined by her sister. has been since before she can remember.

and yet, though she probably wouldn't be able to say why, i don't think lex would change that. not unless she truly believed it would be to hannah's benefit. (and we all know it wouldn't be.)

#starkid #hatchetfield #lex foster #hannah foster #had these thoughts yesterday while explaining hannah delivery lore to someone on here and couldn't get over them #black friday is one of the best songs from any starkid project. you won't change my mind on that. #i'm so so excited for orbweaver #saying this now: if dess and noelle's dynamic ends up being anything like this i will never stop talking about it #(yes i'm an older sibling. why do you ask.) #lex 🤝 zinnia in the pokemon fic i wrote as a young teen: a lot of this stuff #narrative nonsense

[pythoneon]

Something something Ted and Lex being parallels to each other in which they both become reluctant parental figures for their younger siblings who they’d do anything for

Something something Hannah and Pete being parallels bc they’re raised by their flawed but well meaning siblings and end up as their polar opposites, but for the better

#starkid #hatchetfield #nerdy prudes must die #starkid npmd #pete spankoffski #hatchetverse #nightmare time #npmd #lex foster #hannah foster #ted spankoffski #I really love the sibling relationships in Hatchetfield #also I know that most of Ted and Pete’s dynamic is off screen and teds a bit of a dock on screen #but I like to think that’s just how he shows love bc he wasn’t raised in the environment Pete was #not like abusive #just maybe neglectful #and Hannah and Lex are just #the best #i love them so much

[northerngoshawk]

y'all i think arlecchino and wriothesley should meet

#they're two sides of the same coin #both were adopted into a 'family' that runs darker than meets the eye #both killed their 'parent(s)' to protect their foster siblings #both were essentially punished for their crimes #(wriothesley was arrested and sent down to the fortress of meropide) #(arlecchino was detained regarded as dangerous and given the very same title of the woman who forced her to kill her own friend) #both eventually became the heads of their respective prisons #both made a name for themselves and reformed their prisons to be their homes #aka what in the promised neverland are these two #yeah they should meet #i think it would be neat #genshin impact #wriothesley #arlecchino #NOT A SHIP POST

[swagging-back-to]

every single time you stress out about your taxes, or your rent, or your debt, or your mortgage, or your car payment, or your medical bills, or climate change, or your stress over having to work and just do basic things like eating----- remember that if you have children, *you are directly responsible** for them feeling all of that suffering and stress and pain when they grow up.

#anti natalism #anti natalist #antinatalism #antinatalist #i genuine sit down and wish harm upon the woman who birthed me every single day for the fact she chose to keep me just to put me in foster #she did not need to make me or my four siblings. #she chose to. #she lived 3 minutes away BY FOOT to a planned parenthood. #she got rid of all her kids immediately after birthing them #she is nothing more than a factory to pop out suffering. #and i fucking hate her for that. #i would wish harm upon my sperm donor too but he already died #to think all ofthis couldve been avoided if she just did not keep me or god forbid used a goddamn condom #my entire life has been suffering. not even just with adult responsibilities #although those are definitely making everything worse #as in. im about to die on the streets homeless in a month or so. #bc i was born into poverty and abuse #all couldve been avoided if i was just never born

[flymmsy]

Fraternal ‘twins’ Orin and Durge - a ready womb was needed to prepare the way for Bhaal’s creation. Helena carried Durge and Orin together, with Orin as the ‘necessary side effect’ for Durge to be brought into the world.

#I have a lot of feelings about Orin and Durge!!!!!!! #and Orin’s envy of Durge is so deep rooted I just keep pushing the angst button #but I also believe there is so much connection between them #Saarevok is instructed to place Durge with a foster family #Helena is left holding Orin - even more reason for Helena to resent her daughter #Durge was expected to absorb Orin in the womb but they didn’t #also can lead to doubts about who is ACTUALLY the destined Chosen #bg3 #durge #the dark urge #orin the red #flymmsy sibling relationships #tw pregnancy #cw pregnancy

[gaylactic-fire]

*Artists here is a very broad term not exclusive to one medium

#fires posts #poll #we have been learning about the nature V nurture debates in class and It got me so curious about art #Like my sibling and I are hugely artistic. My dad studied animation and is a hobbiest composer. My mom knits and has a background in drama #Did we inherit our creativity? Or was it just something we learned from it being fostered? #If our parents discouraged us would we still have that creative capacity hardwired inside us? #I really don't know but it's a highly fascinating subject for me

[ljf613]

Kuvira's dynamic with Suyin and her family just makes so much more sense if you understand that she was not Suyin and Baatar's adopted daughter-- she was their foster daughter.

#avatar legend of korra #thoughts #kuvira #i said what i said #i remember coming into the fandom and seeing all these confused takes on kuvira and then i realized y'all thought she was adopted #which i never did #she's clearly a foster kid and there's a world of a difference #anyone who's ever had or been a foster kid/sibling will tell you this #i loved (and still love) all of my (former) foster siblings to pieces #but the relationships we've had are entirely different than what we would have had if they'd been my biological or adopted siblings #and there's really no comparison #all queued up

[nick-close]

This is the Jodie Glenn dynamic if they didn’t hate eachother

#they hated jesus because he spoke the truth #I’ve been so brain rotted about my siblings au recently #that’s where this came from #I wrote whole ass scenes out and I can’t share they’re incoherent #dndads #dungeons and daddies #dndads odyssey #dndads s1 #glenn close #Jodie foster #also hi I’m at a con in Calgary isn’t that fun #I wish I could’ve dndads cosplayed #so busy and tired tho

[coochiequeens]

These men just don't want to be around kids otherwise they would be the fun uncle, volunteer for Big Brothers and Big Sisters, be ok with dating women with kids and have a good relationship with the step kids. They just think they were entitled to biological offspring.

Amelia Hill

@byameliahillMon 28 Aug 2023 11.00 EDT

Father’s Day is dangerous for Robert Nurden. Childless not through choice but, as he puts it, “complacency, bad luck, bad judgment”, he tries to stay indoors and ignore the family celebrations outside.

But one year, he went for a walk. “I met family after family. There were children everywhere,” he remembered. “It was terrible. Just so painful. So many ambushes and triggers for my anguish.”

There is very little research into men who have not had children, although that is beginning to change. Research by Dr Robin Hadley has found that 25% of men over 42 do not have children – 5% more than women of the same age group.

Half of the men who are not fathers but wanted to be describe a huge grief and isolation from society. Almost 40% have experienced depression and a quarter feel a deep anger

Now 72, Nurden had a sheltered upbringing. Reaching adulthood, there was a lot he wanted to experience. “Having children was a very low priority. I was complacent: I just assumed it would happen,” he said.

It was not until he was in his early 40s that Nurden started to get broody. But by that point, he discovered, women of a similar age had already had children, if they were able or wanted to.

“I went into this 15-year period of not going into relationships or ending relationships quickly because I knew that person wasn’t going to want or be able to have a child with me – or that the relationship wasn’t going to be strong enough to last if we did have a child,” said Nurden.

He said high-profile older fathers breed complacency in ordinary men. “If I’m honest, even when I was in my 50s I believed that it might happen for me. But in real life, the Mick Jagger and Jon Snow-age fathers are actually very rare – and in any case, it’s medically not wise, as regards sperm quality.”

What compounded Nurden’s pain was that there was no public or private discussion about how men feel when circumstance leaves them unable to become fathers.

“There’s lots of publicity, quite rightly, about women and childlessness but men are very mute about this. Married men don’t want to hear it either: I’ve had men with children react with anger, as though they feel threatened, when I’ve tried to talk about my pain,” he said.

“I was mute too until recently, because as I aged, I found the regret grew into a great pain,” he added. “Unlike many other forms of grief, this compounds itself as it gets older: I wasn’t a father but now I’m not a grandfather. When I’m even older, I might find myself entirely alone.”

Nurden has published a book, I Always Wanted to be a Dad: Men Without Children, about his story and that of some other men. “It turns out that there is a lot of pain, regret and sadness out there,” he said.

Hadley, the researcher, is childless because although his wife had wanted children, by the time she and Hadley met, her age meant the risk of having one was too great. “I chose love but that doesn’t make the pain of not having children any less,” he said. “When a close colleague had his first child, I was so jealous that I couldn’t be in the same room as him.”

Being a father is a marker of status in many countries, said Hadley, but not in the west. “While there has recently been a lot more public discussion about how to be a good father, we still don’t have any narrative or celebration about how important it is for men to become a father in the first place,” he said.

Paul Goulden, the chair of Ageing Without Children, said that, along with the lack of public dialogue about becoming a father, he was “not convinced that there’s this Game of Thrones genetic push felt by men to have children”.

Instead, he said: “There’s this mistaken belief that men are fertile across their lifespan, so there’s no imperative to get on with it.”

That complacency persists because men without children historically have not spoken about their grief. But, Goulden said: “I hope Robert’s book will trigger a change in public dialogue around this issue. I think there’s an overwhelming sense of loneliness and fear out there about who is going to be there for these men, when they’re old and all alone.”

I wonder what their exes for these men would about them. Because the bar for Father's is so low that women showing they didn't want kids with them should really be a sign to do some soul searching.

Personal experience.......I think of my ex fiance who constantly said he wanted ro get married and have kids. However his actions said he wanted me to have the kids while he worked full time, he didn't believe in daycare so no job for me, and he would have to go to the gym almost everyday, he had a physically demanding job, and of course have his weekly card night with his buddies. And yes I stated all my objections but he had tunnel vision when it came to his fantasy family life. There's more but those were the issues relevant to this article.

#Men really being the victims #Families celebrating Father's day was ambushing him #Does he do anything for his father on Father's day or use his feels to push the emotional labour for that onto his siblings? #If childless men die alone it's because they did nothing to foster relationships with the children in their families #One on the men interviewed was economically stable in a stable marriage They could adopt #Shout out to that anon who sent this link #No one is entitled to biological children #A grown ass man was so jealous of a friend's baby he couldn't be in the same room. I hope he stays away from that family #Being a father is a marker of status in many countries said Hadley but not in the west...... #.....I posted articles explaining the fatherhood bonus versus the motherhood penalty in the workforce #What are they doing with their time and energy that they have due to not having kids? #Do they volunteer within their communities? #Attend social events? #Do they travel? #Do they try to look at the upside of not having kids? #Or just brood in resentment and anger? #I get the vibe of if these guys were younger they would be posting black knight stories on 4chan directed at women with children #A journalist just recorded their statements #A therapist would ask who iscthe anger directed at?