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#i never leave the house becuase its too exhausting and painful so i never get the chance to meet people
andragoras-in-vanity · 5 months
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my head hurts, im bleeding still (more so than before i called ny clinic), im so stressed i want to cry cause i have no support and so much to do and all i want is my person cause everyone is in christmas mode and i cant handle this time of year alone again
#i never leave the house becuase its too exhausting and painful so i never get the chance to meet people#and theres nothing to do here and i swear this is the city of the worlds ugliest men anyway#so theres no reason to leave#and i cant use dating apps cause im trans and the only one thats actually decent to trans people isnt popular#and again some of yall are just the most boring people alive id rather kill myself than subject myself to that#like genuinely i cant fathom how these people are so average and so ugly all at once and all seem to have the same personality#like great okay i like dnd too but why is it your only personality trait#maybe your life isnt as empty as mine but its definitely not interesting either#like...i just want my one person#at this point thats all i want in life anyway cause nothing else is worth the effort#and instead i have to watch so many ungrateful people get what i desperately need#honestly do aby of you know what its like to have no idea when the next time if youll get to kiss someone?#youll get to like someone enough to want to?#but have no idea if or when itll happen when every atom of you feel likes its being ripped apart from want and need and#a history that hates you and your own body being unreliable and in pain?#i want to throw up over it all i cant do this any more and im sick to death of all of you who brag about shit you dont deserve#you had your taste of goodness sit down shut the fuck up and let some of the rest of us whove never had anything get a taste too
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katsukisbimbo · 4 years
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Fight Me
✯ Hashibira Inosuke x Strong! Fem! Reader
✯ genre: crack!!!! kind of strangers-to-friends-to-lovers au? kinda ooc characters but it do be like dat
✯ summary: inosuke likes girls that can put him in his place
✯ wordcount: 2.0k +
note: this was a request by @ahegaoapril sorry if it took me so long to write it!! i had to rewatch some of kny to get the events right but i hope you enjoy!!
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- okay so
- you first met tanjirou when you were making your way to the drum house
- you saw that he was a fellow demon slayer so why not stick with each other yknow
- teamwork makes the dream work
- “hi i’m y/l/n y/n!! what’s your name??”
- “i’m kamado tanjirou!! how old are you??” you tell him your age and luckily you guys were close to each other’s ages
- omg!!
- new bffs
- but then you could sense the presence of a demon coming from the box tanjirou was carrying on his back
- and he’s like
- ruh roh
- o.o
- “aHHhsjd you don’t have to tell me anything if you don’t want to!! feel free to tell me whenever you’re ready!!”
- and he’s just uwuing
- because wow you’re so nice
- he’s gonna l o v e being your friend
- on your way up the mountain you see a blonde simp trying to harass a girl into marrying him
- sigh
- simps
- you notice that he’s wearing the demon slayer uniform
- ‘do they accept just anyone in the demon slayers’
- you and tanjirou make your way over to them and try to pull the simp off of the poor girl
- “hEY gEt off hEr rIghT nOw”
- “please marry me i’m so weak please i need you to protect me you’re so beautifu-“
- you grab the weirdo and fling him away from the girl
- she thanks you and starts being the crap out of him and honestly you couldn’t find the kindness in yourself to stop her
- eh
- it ez what it ez
- he goes on crying about how he was weak and how he needed a wife until
- “EHHHHH WHO IS THIS BEAUTY YOU’RE WITH HUH TANJIROU? HUH WHO IS SHE? YOU PUSHED MY FUTURE WIFE AWAY BECAUSE YOU ALREADY HAVE YOUR OWN GSHSJSDJDBX-“
- but before he could go on you shoved him onto the floor making him eat dirt (poor baby)
- time skip becuase zenitsu is too chaotic
- you guys made your way up the mountain
- whew
- you need to work out more
- y/n’s stamina said: no
- after you guys got to the drum house you saw two little kids crying and hugging each other but suddenly a kid fell out the window
- you turned to shield the kids’ eyes so that they wouldn’t be able to see
- you, tanjirou, and zenitsu made your way inside of the house, sensing berko is demons on your way in
- you sadly got seperated from zenitsu and tanjirou
- sigh
- what nOW
- and you suddenly see a fucking guy with a boar mask
- “HAHAAHAHAHSAIAH”
- whAT THE FUCK
- RUN GET OUT OF THERE WHAT IS THAT
- luckily it just breezes past you and goes on a rampage
- ...
- when you got out you saw a beaten up zenitsu shielding tanjirou’s box from the boar mans relentless kicks
- oh no
- you fly into action and kick the shit outta the boar man
- but tanjirou suddenly comes out and yells at you to stop and that demon slayers weren’t allowed to raise their blades against one another
- who said that you were gonna be fighting with swords
- “sTOP Y/N-CHAN YOU’LL GET HURT”
- “IDC BITCH I DIDN’T CHOOSE THE THUG LIFE THE THUG LIFE CHOSE ME”
- “the hate u give little infants fucks everyone” -2pac
- y/n: *proceeds to beat the shit out of the boar dude and successfully knocks him out with one kick to the back of its head”
- ...
- pending....
- loading....
- after inosuke woke up he threatened to beat the shit out of you but you just ignored him and continued to help tanjirou and zenitsu bring the bodies back outside
- after burying everyone, you guys decided to make your way to the wisteria house to get some rest and heal up
- on the way there and during your stay there inosuke wouldn’t leave you the fuck alone
- “hEY YOU FIGHT ME”
- “no”
- “wHY NOT”
- “cuz i’m stronger than you, you’ll just hurt yourself. we’re here to rest”
- cue inosuke screaming and lunging at you
- but nah you weren’t bout it
- you simply side stepped and turned to jump inosuke and pin him down
- “give it up pretty boy”
- *boomboom*
- huh
- what was this
- why did inosuke feel his heart beat a little faster
- what was this feeling
- eh
- he’s probably just hungry
- ...
- you, inosuke, and tanjirou are currently battling the spider dad
- “tANJIROU WHAT IS THAT”
- “i DONT KNOW”
- both tanjirou and inosuke make a move to slash at spider daddy’s arms but they were too tough, you quickly ran towards them successfully slashing the demons right arm
- “hOWD YOU DO THAT?!!!? HIS SKIN WAS SO HARD”
- “and? life is hard, but you get through it”
- wise words by y/l/n y/n
- life do be hard doe
- anyways
- inosuke felt his heart beat a little faster in his chest,,,what did that mean?? is he tired or something?? but why did seeing you cut spider daddy’s arm make his heart go boom boom
- as the battle goes on, tanjirou was yEETED to the next dimension, leaving only you and inosuke to fight against daddy long legs
- “DONT DIE BOTH OF YOU”
- hah as if you’d die without confessing to inosuke
- huh
- wait what
- yOU LIKE INOSUKE
- hehe
- your thoughts are suddenly interrupted when spidaddy suddenly lunges at you but you were luckily able to get out of the way
- “oI PAY ATTENTION”
- “SHUT UP BAKANOSUKE”
- :(
- after some time inosuke was able to slice through arachne daddy’s arms but it suddenly ran away
- “oi inosuke lets go”
- boom boom
- there it was AGAIN
- maybe he needed to see a doctor
- you follow the demon only to see it shedding its skin and regaining its arm back
- what the fuck
- eND ME NOW
- you glance at inosuke but he isn’t budging
- you’re suddenly filled with fear when you realize that inosuke was accepting the fact that he was going to be defeated
- you were about to yell at him until
- “no way am i going to lose. i’m hashibira inosuke of the demon slaying corps!”
- whew
- you let inosuke take the lead as you knew that he was filled with new determination to kill this demon and get you two to safety
- but when the demon got its hands on inosuke you were suddenly filled with an immeasurable amount of rage
- you lunged at the demon and stabbed your blades into both of its shoulders
- it let out a piercing scream as you dig your blades even further into its flesh
- but suddenly a flash and inosuke was on the floor with the demons arms
- you turned your head and saw the water pillar, tomioka giyuu
- “gIyUU-SAN thank god!! could you please finish him off? i need to fix inosuke up” and he just nods at you and gets crack-a-lackin
- he defeats spider daddy in a span of 2 seconds while you and inosuke are mesmerized by his skill and technique
- as he makes his way deeper in the woods he is stopped by inosuke calling out to him
- “HOLD UP FIGHT ME MISMATCHED HAORI”
- and at that point you were too tired and exhausted to listen to inosuke or to baby sit him
- so you knock him out and smile sheepishly at giyuu
- after giyuu left, all the exhaustion seeps into your bones causing you to pass out right on top of inosuke, making you unconsciously snuggle into his chest
- GOSH THATS CUTE
- by the time you wake up you were already at shinobu’s butterfly estate. surprisingly you were the first one up from your friends
- you looked at the bed beside yours and saw that you were in between zenitsu and inosuke
- you slowly slipped out of bed and sat on inosuke’s
- dumbass still had his mask on
- you slowly examine his body to see how his wounds were healing and they were healing pretty well
- you moved your hands to touch his own, feeling how warm and rough they were from long hours of practicing his swordsmanship
- “ehem”
- GEHSJDJ
- you quickly drop inosuke’s hand and turn your head to see a short armed zenitsu smirking at you
- “iTS NOT WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE I WAS JUST WORRIED OK STOP LOOKING AT ME LIKE THAT SIMP”
- “hehe you like him don’t you”
- >:)
- “and if i do? what about it?”
- 0o0
- zenitsu didn’t think that you’d actually admit it
- “hey, there’s nothing wrong with liking him. it’s normal. you guys would be cute together”
- “i-i s-shUT UP,,, but thanks zenitsu,,, do you really think he’d like me back though?”
- “of course he does y/n, you’re strong beautiful, intelligent, and skilled! he’d be stupid to not like you”
- aWH
- zenitsu could be really cute sometimes
- but what you two didn’t know was that inosuke was awake the w h o l e time
- and he was BLUSHING so HARD under his mask omg
- ceo of tomatoes
- this was yours and zenitsu’s little secret
- after all of you had healed up you noticed that inosuke was a little clingier towards you
- whenever you guys ate he would give you a piece of HIS tempura and he never does that???
- and whenever you two are sparring he always has this look in his eye, like he was looking at something so precious to him
- eh maybe it was just the lighting
- he wouldn’t have feelings for you
- was what you thought until you overheard the three musketeers talking
- “kentaro,,, is it normal for my heart to go really fast when i see y/n?? she’s really strong and i really like that. i love fighting with her and i wanna be as strong as her. but whenever we fight i get chest pains and my tummy feels weird. am i sick?”
- and zenitsu and tanjirou are just like
- ‘r u an idiot lol’
- but this is inosuke
- “listen inosuke, i think you like y/n,, maybe even love her,,”
- wHA
- bruh you’re being punkd tell the cameras to come out right now
- this has to be a JOKE
- before you could stop yourself your body already made its way into the room they were in and slid the door open
- *bANG*
- and suddenly the three of them are jumping into the air
- but when they see that it’s you, zenitsu and tanjirou make their way out, leaving you and inosuke by yourselves
- “so i hear-“
- “i think i love you”
- what
- the
- fuck
- did he just say he loved you
- or did you have some sort of brain damage
- sOMEONE PAGE SHEPHERD
- “i think you’re really pretty and you’re so strong that you don’t even seem to break a sweat when you kick my ass. i really like fighting with you but when i do,, looking at you makes me feel all weird and tingly”
- 0.0
- you suddenly lunge at inosuke and hug him and he hesitantly puts his arms around you
- “i think i love you too bakanosuke”
- cue tanjirou and zenitsu cheering
- “i still won’t go easy on you when we’re sparring though”
- “good, i don’t want you to”
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iwriteficsandmore · 5 years
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With No Wings to Fly
Crimson. 
You had always loved the vibrant color. To you, it was the color of the most beautiful tulips, or gorgeous sunsets, of the precious thing you called life.
And most dearly to you, it was the color of those wonderful wings on your beloved's back. A man you met as Hawks, the No.2 hero of Tokyo. A man who became known to you as Keigo, the man you loved with every fiber of your being. 
But now...now you couldn't take the horrid sight of red out of your head. The sight of those gorgeous wings--wings that had saved you, saved so many people so many times over the years--gone. 
It all happened too fast. That man's deadly touch brushing against his wings, his powers spreading too quickly for you to see. But not for him. 
And now they were conpletely gone. 
Ripped from Keigo's back mercilessly by his own hand with one last feather before they could completely disintegrate him whole.
The warmth of his blood spilled through your fingers as you struggled to haul him through the villains' liar, your hand splayed across his now bare back on the open wounds left behind by his wings. 
Lighter...but so, so much heavier.
You didn't know who was on your back, but that mattered very little. You just knew you had to run. The cacophony of all the fighting was still bouncing through the place. Heroes vs villains, the former outnumbering the latter, and the situation was looking grimmer by the minute. Casualties were cropping up all over the place, and Keigo almost joined them. The thought alone made your blood run cold almost as horridly as another thought did.
The No.2 hero--the Winged Hero had fallen.
A sudden yelp escaped you when suddenly your foot got caught on an uneven edge, your leg buckling underneath you from the imbalance and added weight on your shoulders. You fell to one knee, grunting as you went down, but held tight to Keigo as he barely held onto his consciousness. 
He shuffled over you, his amber eyes dull and dazed over as they looked over to you. 
"Leave, y/n..." His voice was raspy and weak, but it was there. He was still there. He's alive. 
"Shut up, please," you replied. You wanted for it to sound stern, but you were too panicked by his injuries and the feud happening behind you for it to come out as anything other than shaky. 
All those things finally gave you the strength to pull yourself up and keep dragging yourselves along the path ahead, regardless of where it took you. So long as it was away from the fighting and to safety, to somewhere you could treat his bleeding wounds. 
"Where do you think you're going with him, princess?"
The scorching azure flames entered your vision as they ran by your side, leaping bounds in circles to surround you. To encage you in a prison of fire. 
Somewhere in him Keigo found the strength to push you behind him, but you couldn't keep from noticing how his back tensed noticeably. If to brace himself to protect you or in a innate reflex to brace his missings wings, you weren't sure. 
Vibrant, turquoise eyes shone in the dark menacingly, his aloof stare seemingly nonchalant as he met eyes with you, but you could see deep in those eyes the thick sense of danger and raw killing intent. 
Dabi wanted your heads. 
Keigo somehow cracked a smug grin, part of his lips upturned despite the cuts and bruises marring his face. 
"Your fight's with me."
"Not anymore." He nodded your way, that death stare pinning you in place a d making you jump in your skin. "Princess over here interfered just like you did. And well, after all that's happened, I'm taking this personal now." His hand set abalzed, Dabi sent a pillar of blue flames your way. 
You didn't know what came over you. All you knew was that you couldn't let him die. You couldn't let Keigo do what he always did: martyr himself. Before you knew what happened, your Quirk came to life--
And all stopped. 
The flames that shot your way flickered and stilled feet from your faces. The rumbling and screaming from outside quieted. All but what you touched stopped in its tracks. Keigo couldn't help but stare dumbfounded at what you'd done, something you never had before. 
You urged him to move between bated breaths. This wouldn't last and you knew it. Renewed with strength from adrenaline, Keigo drew you by the hand as far away as possible as you helped him balance himself. A tiny timer in your head ticked, ticked, ticked the more time passed until it finally stopped d you felt your body exhaust itself. 
Unable to carry both of you, you turned a corner and into the nearest room. Once inside you lowered him to the ground and searched for a a hiding spot, finding one in the small study connected to the room. Hauling him over, you carefully sat him against the wall, red painting the back as it slowly rolled down the wall. Your tears choked you at the sight of his missing wings, but you wiped away at them not wanting for him to see. Just as you did though, his hand reached up and cradled your cheek in it.
The gesture made you look up and meet his amber gaze that, despite all his injuries and massive wound, smiled at you along with his lips. 
"You never told me you had such an amazing Quirk." 
"It's not," you wept, unable to contain it anymore. "I can only stop time. I can't turn it back."
I can't change the past. 
Keigo chuckled lightly but groaned when thatwracked pain across his back. Wanting to soothe him, you scooted closer to him to embrace him and hide the tears that rolled down your cheeks now. Keigo held you close, relishing on the sensation of having you in his arms to keep from his mind what he'd lost.
"Y'know, I never gave much thought to the future, not until I met you," he said quietly. "And recently, I'd been thinking of how I wanted to get a little house back in Fukuoka. A nice place where we'd move in together, maybe even after getting married. Somewhere we could be in peace with a kid or two running around."
Your tears stopped as you listened to him talk. Taken a ack by his words, you tried to get up to see him but he held you tightly in place. 
"Kei, what are you--" 
"It would've been nice. I think that's the kind of life that...would've suited me..."
His voice was weaker and quieter now and your heart almost stopped as it trailed off at the end. Pulling away now without much effort, you held his head close to your chest, dreading how slow and shallow his breathing was turning. 
"We'll get a house there," you whisper back, brushing your fingers through his blonde windstruck tresses. "And we'll go live there and marry and have as many kids as you want but please, please, you've gotta stay with me, Keigo."
"Whatever happens to me is fine," he said, one of hands weakly rubbing your arm. "So long as your safe."
All above you the place shook as whatever was happening came to an abrupt end. Dust fell from cracks on the cieling but the underground room stayed. Now eerie silence took over and left the two of you in that dark room. You held your breath though as quiet voices managed to somehow ring throught he corridos. They were indistinguishable but they were there--and they were closing in. 
Holding Keigo tighter than before, you whispered prayers to yourself, wanting nothing more than to come out alive. 
Closer and closer the noises became and you held tighter not knowing what else to do. You were too exhausted from your Quirk, from watching you beloved so defeated, and from this entire situation that had put him in harm's way because of what others wanted.
It had never been a choice. Not for him. And it cost him everything. 
Tears finally sprang from your eyes as the door to the room you were opened. The light spilled through as you hid in your corner, a d becuase of its incandescence, it was hard to see. Waiting with bated breath, you aimply looked down at Keigo wishing that if anything, he'd be the one to get out alive.
"Hawks?" 
Never in your life were you happier to hear Enveador's voice calling out. Your voice barely came ove a whisper but you did your best to shout out for them to find you. Just then you turned down your head to assure him in quiet whispers that everything was fine, it'd all be alright now that the others were here.
But he didn't answer. His breathing was barely there. His chest was barely moving anymore.
All that was left was the tight grip he had of you. 
This time when you screamed, it snuffed out with the light that you loved so much. 
The one that with no more wings had fallen.
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