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#i love you guys so much please know that
lesovoj · 2 years
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thank you for staying a little longer even tho it wasnt easy
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egophiliac · 3 months
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CROWLEY SSR THOUGHTS
there is zero basis for this, but I can't get this thought of my head
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I don't know why I decided to draw it this way
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers#(these will be relevant in a moment)#this isn't going to happen. but WHAT IF.#anyway i didn't get him (damnit birdman come home) so i had to look up his story#and let me tell you friends my findings were SHOCKING#crowley canonically likes vegetables which means that the crowley is revaan theory = BUSTED#crowley is sailor venus = CONFIRMED#(i know 'whip of love' is a saying but that's where my mind always goes)#DISCLAIMER: this is (mostly) a joke please continue to hold whatever theories and headcanons you want#but look. c'mon. look over here at this whiteboard i've covered in red yarn.#revaan being a picky eater has come up multiple times and there is an entire whole bit about how much he hated jerky and refused to eat it#and now they've made a point of talking about how crowley will eat almost anything and loOoOoves wild game meat especially#it's SO stupid but i can't help but read way too much into it#(this is tumblr if you don't want to see incredibly stupid overanalysis of anime guys then why are you HERE)#and i gotta hold on to something because otherwise whenever malleus and crowley are onscreen together i just keep going 'same hair color...#unless this is like. some kind of deep cover thing.#lilia doesn't recognize him because he saw him eat a green bean once and revaan would NEVER#crowley's secret is safe for another day#(serious hat on: i do think they're probably connected in some way)#(but there's something deeper going on that we're just not clued into yet that will hopefully explain things)#man forget revaan what if crowley whips off his mask and it turns out he was meleanor this whole time#wait hold on meleanor loves jerky. IT ALL FITS...
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eternallovers65 · 1 year
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Moments in Charles Leclerc that are so insane I wish I made it up but can't, because this stuff can only happen to him
- When his watch got stolen and he decided to CHASE the guy with his custom ferrari 488 pista
- When his former girlfriend got locked out of the apartment and he wasn't answering his phone so she had to subscribe to his Twitch channel to tell him to open the door (please watch his former streams I beg)
- When he crashed Niki Lauda's 1974 ferrari during the Monaco historic grand Prix (his luck I swear)
- Every Monaco Grand Prix ever (the infamous charles leclerc curse)
- When he went to dinner with a guy, posted the picture on Instagram and it turns out it was an international criminal wanted by the Interpol
- He went to a restaurant once, handed his car to the valet and the car was out of fuel
- When he went for a run, took some photos with fans and this couple started to fight in front of him
- When he didn't realized his tiktok likes were open to the public (it was mostly fan edits of himself, baby goats, babies but mostly fan videos about himself)
- Recently, he dropped his airpods in the airport floor and decided to use this gigantic clamp to get it back
- Or just his babygirl esque nature (i love him <3)
- He accepted a ride from two strangers just because he couldn't find a cab (Arthur was also in the car!!!)
(Also, feel free to add more, please, and every time he does something so charles, i will uptade the list)
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It's actually so important to me how flawed Penelope is you don't get it. She's complex and she's kind and sweet and caring and loving and bitter and manipulative and insecure and she's young and hurt and fucking up and making mistakes and hurting people and loving people and handling things in the worst way possible with the resources she has on hand and she's allowed to.
So often for a fat (and I say that within the context of the show, Pen is a fat/pus sized character within the narrative even if Nicola isn't) character to have any storyline outside of mother or joke they have to be the perfect victim. To be fat is to be victimised by society to some degree, it is to be told you are unloved and unwanted and unworthy without anyone saying those exact words, we all know this even if we don't want to except it. It's why almost every fat character is bullied in some way even if it's passed off as a joke, and they are just expected to take it because to actually acknowledge the pain and hurt and damage that causes is to acknowledge their humanity.
There is no space for complexity when you do not recognise the humanity of a character, there is no room for mistakes or grace or forgiveness in a narrative when the character is presented as lucky to simply be there. This goes doubly so for romance, as rare as it is to even see plus sized girls as a romantic lead, when they are there is no room for mistakes, the standards they are held to are so vastly different because they can't fuck it all up, they have no room to make mistakes when people question why they're even there in the first place.
But not Penelope. She fucks up so many times over, she creates half her own problems trying to fix things or make herself feel better. It dose not shy away from the damage and underlining issues and insecurities the life she has lead has left her with, and it's sympathetic to be sure, but what she dose with it isn't. Because fat people do not have to be the perfect victim and honestly most of the time are not. Because when you tell someone how little they are worth and how out of place and undesirable they are at every turn and expect them to internalise that, especially a young girl with very little power at her immediate despoil, it doesn't always come out in a very nice palatable way. It doesn't always create nice sweet uncomplicated people who cry a little when insulted but otherwise brush it off. It creates people like Penelope, it creates anger and resentment and bitterness and a need for control.
Whistledown is so many things, not all of them negative, but it is the cause of so many problems in her life after she made it as an attempt at a solution. It has caused her to hurt people and betray people and lose some of the very few genuine connections she actually has. She manipulates people and misleads them to keep her secret, because keeping a secret like that will always result in that. Her motives are sympathetic, she rarely dose anything to bad without reasoning, she has all the excuses in the world and still at the end of the day she fucked up. Her and Eloise are the second love story of the season for a reason. She adores that girl so much and she is absolutely miserable without her, as Eloise is without her. They love each other so much and there is so much pain between them now, they're practically crying every time they look at each other. And even tho the situation was complicated an messy and not completely her fault, she did in a way cause it. She's hurt people and she's hurt herself. And I love that.
Because she's a main character. We know her and Eloise will make up even if it isn't the way it was before (arguably a good thing but that's a different post.) Because she's a romantic lead, because we know, even if we don't know how they get there yet, that she will get her happy ending with the man she absolutely adores and who loves her just as much. It will not be easy I don't want it to be easy, Colin has every right to be angry and hurt and betrayed and he deserves to have the space to say whatever it is he's feeling and to have a negative reaction, but he will forgive her. Part of that is just because of who he is and the relationship he has to her (mandatory Colin appreciation moment) but it's also because the narrative has given her room and grace to be flawed.
There is so much to love about Penelope. She's so intelligent, and she's funny, she's a good listener, she makes people feel heard and important, she's kind, she's attentive, she's romantic, she's creative, she's beautiful. She is a victim and people and society do hurt her, but that's not all she is. She's given the space to be more and still be forgiven and loved just like anyone else. Because her actions is what she's apologising for not her existence. She dose not need to earn her place in a love story just because she's fat, it's her actually flaws and mistakes that exist in abundance no matter how sympathetic some of them might be, that she has to make up for. And I adore that and her.
You take away so much of her character and her agency and her complexity when you say she did nothing wrong or that she's the absolute devil. Let her be flawed, let her be someone trying their best and failing at it, let her make mistakes. But give her some grace, for once the narrative is. Her happy ending will come Bridgerton is a romance show, but she'll have to work for it. Colin and her will work for and earn their happy ending together, because they love each other and because of who they are and what they mean to each other they will find a way to make it work, but also because the writers let them and her find it.
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d3atherection · 7 months
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I FUCKING LOVE THIS GUY YOU WOULDNT GET IT
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jung-koook · 2 years
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taehyung's hands are such an art for @taeyungie ♡
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moeblob · 22 days
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Happy Birthday to Ferdinand von Aegir!
I actually made 33 emotes, affectionately known as Aegirglyphics to some, for my own personal use on discord. However, I figure why not share some of them! They're free to use for discord servers/icons/pfps or whatever. However, my only request is Do NOT use them as subscriber emotes on Twitch. You can make them free follower emotes but you are not to make them locked behind a paywall.
#fe three houses#ferdinand von aegir#discord emotes#i thought long and hard about this bc idk the actual want for emotes i made ages ago but#i still love my son and its his bday ad so i should be nice and share#since i no longer have nitro and can no longer use them myself#the fact i can technically post 30 at once was tempting but#some of them arent living up to my standards and also just might not be easy to use in most contexts#so those im gonna skip on lol#whoever wants 21 aegirglyphics tho have at em#i think i might have posted some before? but only 10 and i dont recall which ones#if you want a secret the last three and the middle on the second row are my favorites to use#i used concernednand (the upper one) so much#the internet concerns me guys it was a valid use every time#debated sharing heartnand but honestly the world could benefit from it imo because gotta spread that love#fun lil trivia i love making emotes and so when i was in a server and people knew me as the ferdinand fan and artist#someone was like why hasnt salmon made a ferdinand emote yet#and im like bc i dont run the server and i cant just demand they add my art#and then a mod was like i didnt wanna put pressure on salmon but i thought about it so i was like bet#and then drew a server exclusive happy ferdinand emote#and that was the start of me somehow being able to have like.... ten emotes in that server#some of them were just me joking and then mods encouraging me#cause i used to use felix for every single art prompt theyd give and one week someone said the prompt was pog#and i just was so upset because dude why would i wanna draw felix for that hes not pog#so a mod was like hey if you make a pog felix emote we ill add it to the emotes here#so i once again was like bet and then posted it and then they really added it lmao#anyway sorry for so many rambles please feel free to use them on discord in whatever server#i cant really expect everyone to credit me but also im not really concerned since i fear people know my nands a mile away
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thekittyokat · 13 days
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you ever just have a lot, a LOT of feelings all at once about a character and not even remotely enough words or brainpower to FORM the words to describe everything you're feeling. so it feels like you may explode. yeah
#sorry i got really into my feelings about mark hoffman again#the very specific version of him in my brain that i really really wish i had the time and energy to properly share with you guys#saw#well until i muster the energy to explode all of my feelings out into a fic. if you want to TRY and understand#know that my three biggest hoffman fic insps right now are as follows#your best kept secret hoffman. a series of mistakes hoffman. and rushed like a dreadful wind hoffman.#there is a very clear throughline just know i am extremely emotionally compromised rn#thinking about theee fics vs the canon path hoffman spirals down#something something the absolute tragedy of watching a man's descent into madness#the transformation of a man into a monster#and what could have saved him from himself and kramer's corruption#sorry i'm rambling so much oh my god i was just having such a crying fit out of nowhere about this#do you think he could feel it happening. do you think he was aware he was losing his mind.#the script version of him fucks with me so bad. the crazed rankings and the longer hair and him not being well kept anymore#it's impossible to think he didn't know he was deteriorating#fuuuck okay i need to either chill or write a whole longfic rn#i project on that guy so much i truly don't know if i could properly write my vision of him#until i do something more substantial the full extent of my hoffman exists for me and my boyfriend only. they get me like no one else#well ginny and jenna also get me. please read best kept secret and a series of mistakes Oh My God#where am i going with this. i like tag rambling actually this is a nice way to do it without forcing EVERYONE to read my delirium#anyways if you've read all of this i think i love you? feel free to dm me about hoffman and my very specific headcanons and aus#maybe soon i'll try and start writing my fics about this tragic man#i could never say any of this on twitter btw they'd string me up for my opinions on him as a sad wet beast who could have been fixed#if only he hadn't been weaponized first#god i'm too tired to even be as embarrassed about this as i should be. thought i unlearned cringe already#but i've been spending way too much time on twitter and they HAAATE hoffman there#rip. i know it's not that serious but i'm sensitive rn and hate feeling lonely in my thoughts#ok bye for real otherwise i'll never shut up. i might tag ramble more often bc this was therapeutic in a way i needed badly#cat chat
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bloodydeanwinchester · 5 months
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okay everyone, now that we're almost at the end of 2023 i would LOVE to know what your favorite fanfic that you read for the first time this year was?
i'll go first, mine was The Benjamin Franklin Key-and-Kite Experiment
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Pathetic (M)
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(I did not edit this picture. Weverse literally just dropped it and I’m so lazy)
Title: Pathetic
Part one of the Pathetic series
Summary:
When your best friend Jeongyeon drags you to a frat party, you aren’t expecting much. Certainly not to be fucked dumb by notorious man whore Yoon Jeonghan, but hey, what happens at a frat party, stays at a frat party.
Simplified tags: 6k words, Porn with Plot, frat boy!Jeonghan, college student!y/n, best friend!Jeongyeon, soft!dom to hard!dom Jeonghan, mean!Jeonghan (and y/n loves it), submissive!y/n, female!y/n (sorry gender-neutral friends), heavy degradation, light masochist!y/n, sadist!Jeonghan, mild pain kink, vaginal fingering, creampie, spitting, slapping, big dick!Jeonghan, blowjob, mentions of aftercare but I don’t write it happening he just says what he’ll do
Warnings: This fic is filthy, dub con (I personally think that the consent is explicit enough but I’m tagging it this way just to be careful since it is intense), Jeonghan is a fiend. There is spitting, a creampie, degredation, like Jeonghan calls you pathetic. You thank him for him treating you like trash. There is after care but there is also light slapping, I’m serious this is literally the filthiest thing I have ever written. I’m embarrassed to have written it, and I hope that the five people who like things like this enjoy it. Jeonghan starts off as a soft!dom, but quickly turns to a hard!dom
I have this... secret blog that I wrote one story on cause I was embarrassed by it and didn’t want it to be on this blog and on that blog I asked if anyone wanted this kind of fic and I had like twelve people like the post so here we go.
-
“Really Jeonghan? Another fling that you just dropped for no reason?” Seungcheol asked, his eyebrows furrowing in confusion. Jeonghan hummed as he placed another lego block together, glancing over at the instructions for the house that he was building.
“Just not a good fit.”
“And by that he means she couldn’t handle him,” Soonyoung pipped up, unhelpfully. Seungcheol sighed.
“What is he? A monster in the bedroom?”
“Have you not heard him with people?” Jihoon asked, a look of disgust on his face as he handed Jeonghan the next lego brick he needed. “They’re sluts, all of them- and I don’t mean that in a derogatory way, he calls them that.”
Seungcheol seemed surprised, but Jeonghan didn’t bat an eye at the accusations.
“They like it, but not as much as I want them to,” Jeonghan replied with a sigh. “This last girl... She doesn’t listen, and not in a cute brat way. She just chases her orgasm and that’s good enough for her.”
Soonyoung snorted.
“Isn’t it enough that you’re able to make her orgasm?”
A smirk spread over Jeonghan’s lips.
“I make everyone I sleep with orgasm.”
“Topic change, topic change,” Seokmin requested desperately from where he was lounging on the couch. The room fell silent for a little bit, but Seungcheol’s curiosity wasn’t going to be quelled just yet.
“You’ve been blowing through fuck buddies for months and you haven’t found a single one that you want to keep. What makes you think you are ever going to find this perfect...” He trailed off, not sure how to finish it.
“Whore,” Jihoon finished. They all looked at him. He shrugged. “He wants the perfect whore. Literally.”
“Desperate for my cock, desperate for my cum...” Jeonghan sighed. “Desperate to cum, but only if I say so. Obedient, and desperate and sloppy-”
“I am begging for a topic change,” Seokmin interrupted. “It’s bad enough we have to hear Jeonghan fucking people-”
“I’m just saying. It doesn’t seem like you’ll be able to find the perfect person-” Jihoon cleared his throat and Seungcheol sighed. “The perfect whore. Why don’t you just settle?”
“The problem isn’t that the perfect whore doesn’t exist,” Jeonghan replied. “It’s that I’ve been looking in the wrong places. I’ll find them. It just takes time.”
“Yay, conflict resolution,” Seokmin cheered humorlessly. “So that means I can go back to my book and you all can go back to your legos and we can talk about next weeks party and not Jeonghan finding the perfect whore.”
A little laugh spread throughout the room and finally Seungcheol allowed the topic to go towards what other frats and sororities to invite to the party.
-
“I want you to go over this again with me, very slowly,” you said, your eyebrows narrowing at Jeongyeon. She gave you a bright smile, brushing back her bob.
“I want you to come with me to a frat party,” Jeongyeon said slowly. You gave Jeongyeon an unamused look.
“A frat party?” You repeated humorously.
“Not just any frat party,” Jeongyeon continued just as brightly. “Phi Mu Alpha Sinfonia’s party.”
You groaned, but she wasn’t having it.
“Come on! You know that Jimin hates Phi Mu Alpha Sinfonia and he never goes to their parties.”
“You and Jimin’s thing is-”
“Infuriating?” Jeongyeon grumbled.
“Stupid,” you corrected.
Jeongyeon and Jimin were two people impossible to be around. Because their hatred for one another didn’t stop at talking smack about one another behind their backs. It didn’t stop at shooting insults at one another in person. It didn’t even stop at Jimin railing Jeongyeon in the dorm room with you in your bed trying desperately pretend like it wasn’t happening.
Jeonyeon and Jimin hated each other to a point where their frustration could only be culled by rough sex every few weeks, and you were desperate for the two to evolve past that.
“Come on, I know that you don’t want me to fuck around with Jimin tonight, and who knows maybe I’ll go home with someone different from Phi Mu if we go there tonight,” Jeongyeon pleaded.
“I’d prefer if you didn’t go home with anyone,” you replied. “I’ll have to find somewhere else to go and-”
“We’ll find someone for you too!” Jeonyeon replied enthusiastically. “Then we both will go home with someone and it will be perfect!”
You pressed your lips together firmly, a clear indication that you weren’t convinced but Jeonyeon grabbed you, hugging your arm.
“Please, the boys at Phi Mu are so handsome. Surely, you’ll find someone you like,” she insisted. 
You sighed as you looked at your friend, realizing that your hopes of studying for the night were completely over.
“Doesn’t everyone call them Alpha Mu boys?” You asked. Jeongyeon rolled her eyes.
“Same diff,” she mumbled. “Come on. You’re not going to just make me go alone are you?”
“I’m not wearing heels,” you said finally.
-
Your heels clacked against the wooden floorboards of the frat house as Jeongyeon practically dragged you through the house. She had the cutest outfit on. A pink dress that resembled that of a loosely torn shirt, with a corset to cause a bit of a silhouette and a pair of heeled white boots on top of it all. That along with her radiant smile she looked like a punk angel. You had tried to match her in ways, sticking with a corset and a loose shirtish dress. You had a choker on that resembled a collar (at her insisting) and regrettably you were wearing a lacy pair of lingerie. Just in case, as Jeongyeon would insist.
You sighed, the thought of being here still being mildly annoying. Frat parties themselves were frustrating. Loud, crowded, sweaty. But on the Brightside Alpha Mu parties had music produced and mixed by Lee Jihoon, so while loud it was bearable.
Jeongyeon practically knew all of the Alpha Mu boys. You wondered idly who she was trying to find tonight. She dragged you up to one of the boys- tall and lanky, and grabbed his arm to get his attention.
“Jun,” she whined. He looked at her over his shoulder, eyes lighting up when he saw her.
“You made it!” He said excitedly. His eyes flickered over to you. “You brought y/n!”
“You said you had someone for her!” Jeongyeon replied, both of their voices extremely loud as to hear one another over the music. “Someone good?”
Your eyebrows widened.
“Wait, you set me up?” You blurted. Jeongyeon didn’t even look upset.
“Of course, I did! I didn’t make you wear lingerie just to socialize all night!” She said. Your face flushed red, but Jun didn’t seem to care about the fact that he now knew what you were wearing under your clothes. Instead, he pointed away from the two of you.
“I’ll be right back,” he said. “I just need to grab him, okay?”
Jeongyeon nodded.
“Okay! We’ll be here!”
“I don’t want to be set up!” You insisted as soon as Jun was far enough that you didn’t think he would hear, which... Wasn’t that long.
“That’s what single people always say,” Jeongyeon said with a roll of her eyes. ”Jun said that you’re really going to like this guy! And that way you have less to do on your end so I can spend as much time as I want trying to find someone for me to spend the night with.”
“You should just go home with Jun,” you said with a roll of your eyes. “I mean it’s not like you guys haven’t fucked bef-”
“Y/n-” Jun’s voice called out over the sound. You looked up to find Jun standing there with someone else. You smiled at him.
“Uh, hi,” you called over the noise of the party.
“Hi, I’m Chan!”
You smiled at the person in front of you politely, noticing that behind Chan, Jun was talking to someone else, who looked notably annoyed. Your eyebrows strewn slightly at the man and for a second you caught one another's eyes. He looked away from you after a moment, his eyes peering at you from under the long strands of his hair.
After only a second, you turned your attention back to Chan. You figured you might as well get this over with.
Chan was... Nice, but that was about it. As awful as it was getting to know anyone at a loud party, you weren’t exactly thrilled to have to yell at him as he drank beer after beer.
You stuck to water but after a while you just couldn’t stand it anymore. You politely made an excuse to get away from him, saying that you were tired and you wandered up the stairs of the house, not wanting to admit to Jeongyeon that the guy that Jun had set you up with just simply wasn’t a match and you wanted to leave.
As you wandered the rooms upstairs, you walked past closed doors in which you could hear moans. You sighed in frustration. At least someone was going to get laid tonight. It seemed like your lingerie really wouldn’t be of any use tonight.
You entered the first empty bedroom that you could find. A king size bed with fluffy blankets in the center of room, a bookshelf with pictures of boys on the shelves, and paintings and the walls. You hummed and began to look around, the sound of the party muted behind the walls of the room.
You finally thought that you had found some peace.
“What are you doing?” A voice asked. You glanced over your shoulder, sighing when you saw the person from earlier. The one who looked annoyed when you had first met Chan. Your eyebrows rose slightly at him.
“Escaping the party.” You paused for a moment your lips pursing and your head falling to the side slightly. “Escaping Chan.”
“You don’t like Chan?” The person asked.
“No I like Chan, I just...” You trailed off.
“Not the sort of person you put on a matching set for?” The person piped up, a small smile crossing his lips as he spoke. You rolled your eyes.
“Sure,” you said, even though- He was right. Chan seemed too nice to be someone that was going to rail you to sleep that night. Regardless, of how attractive he was. As you looked around the room, you noted that the man at the door wasn’t backing down. Instead his eyes were drifting, making their way across your body.
You couldn’t really say you didn’t like the attention.
In fact, while Chan had been handsome, with his long chiseled face, and parted hair, this man was a whole other kind of attractive. He was pretty. His hair was long and wavy, falling past his ears, and yet not touching his shoulders. As your eyes trailed past his pink lips and down to where his shirt lay, just barely covering one of his collarbones. You looked back up at him, to see that he had definitely noticed your interest.
You looked away from him.
“Sorry am I in your room?” You asked him, clearing your throat.
“Yeah,” he commented. “It was getting a bit too loud for me out there too. I was going to close my room door.”
You glanced back at him and he gestured towards the door knob.
“You’re welcome to stay, of course.”
You knew what he meant and your intention in coming out tonight hadn’t really been to get laid. Sure, you had humored Jeongyeon. You had dressed the part, and said the right things but you knew from the minute that you looked at Chan you were going to be spending the night with your vibrator.
But... There was something about this guy.
You shrugged.
“If you don’t mind the company,” you replied. The man hummed and closed the door behind him with a click.
“Jeonghan,” he said, gesturing to himself.
Jeonghan...? You had heard his name from Jeonyeon before.
“Ah, the same one with a different fling every week?” You said, before you could really think over what you had said. Jeonghan hummed and walked over to his closet.
“So you’ve heard of me.”
“A few things,” you replied back. “That you don’t stick in one place for long.”
“But I always get positive reviews,” Jeonghan replied. As he spoke, he took the hem of his shirt, lifting it over his head. Your eyes widened in surprise at the sudden appearance of his six pack. Your cheeks flushed red and you looked away suddenly.
Fuck, he was hot.
“Sorry, it’s hot in here,” Jeonghan said. You heard his hangers clanging softly, and after a few moments they stopped, you looked back at him but he was still standing there shirtless, looking theatrically stumped. “And with nothing better to put on.”
He shrugged and walked over to his bed, taking a seat at the edge. He gestured to your outfit.
“You’re dressed nice... Like Jeongyeon.”
“She’s my best friend,” you replied pointedly. You leaned forward slightly, your fingers slightly dragging up the corner of your skirt. You tried to play it off as accidental, just a brush up of your skirt that would flash the corner of your lacy underwear.
You could tell that Jeonghan knew it wasn’t accidental.
“You want to play a game?” Jeonghan asked. You shrugged offhandedly.
“Depends on the outcome.”
“Come here,” Jeonghan said softly. You looked at him from across the room, your eyebrows raised.
“Why should I?” You asked. His lips quirked up slightly.
“If you do, you’ll get to cum, and if you don’t...”
He knew he didn’t have to finish that threat.
You walked over to Jeonghan, coming between his knees. His hands fell to your sides, squeezing your hips slightly as you raised your hands to his shoulders. You swallowed thickly at the proximity of the two of you.
“Tell me what you want,” Jeonghan said. Your nose scrunched slightly, mostly in embarrassment.
“I want you to fuck me,” you said softly. The smile that spread across Jeonghan’s face was one of pure delight.
“Really?” He asked, his voice riddled with surprise. His fingers dipped below the hem of your shirt and his fingers daintily brushed over the lace of your lingerie. You shivered a little under his touch, your fingers gripping at his shoulders a little bit tighter. “You really want some stranger to fuck you upstairs at a frat party?”
The degrading chide in his voice made your cheeks flare up even more. You cleared your throat, your eyes trailing away from him.
“Well, if your reputation proceeds you, I would love to be one of your...” You mumbled. Your face blazed even redder. “Sluts.”
One of Jeonghan’s fingers raised to your face, tilting your chin towards you. His eyes flickered down to your lips.
“Don’t worry love, I’ll treat you just the way that you deserve.”
Jeonghan’s fingers lowered to your throat, his hand making it’s way to the back of your neck.
“You’re so pretty,” he mumbled. “Just pretty enough for someone like Chan. You look so delicate.”
“I’m not delicate,” you murmured back, but the praise itself was making it hard to keep eye contact with Jeonghan.
“No?” Jeonghan breathed. He was so close to you that both of your breaths were intermingling. His grip on your neck was tight. “Is that why you didn’t want to spend the night with Chan? You want someone to rough you up? Someone to treat you like a little whore?”
You couldn’t help the airy moan that left your lips at the sound of the word.
“Do you want me to kiss you?” Jeonghan asked you. You nodded, feeling yourself growing closer to him as his fingers ran closer to your core over the lace of your panties.
“I’m going to need some words from you,” Jeonghan said seriously, his other hand tightening around the back of your neck. “Or else you’re going to get jack shit from me.”
“I do,” you said immediately. “I want you to kiss me.”
He pressed hard on the back of your neck, pressing you closer to his lips until they had crashed together. Despite how gentle Jeonghan had started off, the kiss was when he started to show his true colors. You whined against his lips as he forced his tongue into your mouth, pressing you closer to him.
He pulled you off of him, smiling when you leaned forward, desperate for his lips again. He hummed, his fingers dipping down underneath the hem of your lingerie, and he pressed his fingers down to your clit. You whined, throwing your head back.
“F-fuck,” you mumbled, rolling your hips towards Jeonghan. “I really fucking need this. Jeongyeon has been hammering sex into my head all day.”
“Yeah? You really that starved for sex?”
You nodded, leaning forward to catch Jeonghan’s lips again but he didn’t give you the satisfaction. He pulled back.
“No,” he chided. “You’re a bit needy aren’t you?”
You whined in response as Jeonghan’s fingers slid past your clit, to your already wet folds. He shook his head.
“Chan get you like this?” He asked. “Even though he was too vanilla for you, he is very attractive. Did he make you needy? Would you have resorted to your vibrator tonight thinking about him? Wishing he would treat you the way you want to be treated?”
As Jeonghan spoke he worked one of his fingers into you, his long fingers pushing deeper inside of you than your own fingers could. You whined, shaking your head.
“N-No,” you murmured. “It wasn’t him.”
Jeonghan hummed again, like he didn’t really believe you, so you continued.
“You made me like this,” you insisted. Your fingers tightened on Jeonghan’s shoulders, and your eyes lowered to Jeonghan’s lap where you could see a tent in his sweatpants. When you glanced back up Jeonghan didn’t seem very convinced. “How am I supposed to respond to the way you’ve been treating me?
Jeonghan scoffed.
“You should be fucking humiliated,” Jeonghan replied. “You’re doing everything I want you to, taking every single thing I give you-” As Jeonghan spoke he pushed another finger into your pussy, causing a small, pleasurable burn to run through your body. “I bet you’d even thank me for it. Are you going to thank me for fingering your stupid wet cunt?”
Your face blazed but you nodded obediently.
“Thank you,” you mumbled, your voice quivering as soft moans slipped from your mouth.
“Thank you for what?” Jeonghan asked. Your eyes fluttered down, and Jeonghan crooked his fingers deep inside of you.
“Thank you for f-fingering me,” you said, your eyes shooting back up to Jeonghan’s. He smiled.
“Good girl,” he praised. “But you don’t really deserve this, you know that?”
You whined as he shoved a third finger inside of you. His pace was fucking agonizing. His fingers slowly spreading your pussy... Hopefully so that it was ready for his cock.
“At least, you haven’t really proven yet that you deserve this,” Jeonghan amended. He slipped his fingers from you and your whine was cut off by Jeonghan sticking his fingers into your mouth. You immediately sucked them clean, moaning around them. He hummed again, seeming to still be unsure of exactly what to make of you. His hand gently pressed against your stomach, pressing you backwards.
“Get undressed, I want to see you.”
As you began to take your clothes off (struggling immensely with the corset that you had barely gotten on in the first place), Jeonghan stood up as well. Your eyes stayed glued to his chest until he lowered his sweatpants down and kicked them away to reveal his cock.
You faltered in your ministrations, your mouth dropping when you saw the size of Jeonghan’s cock. God, you had never slept with anyone bigger than Jeonghan. Never even imagined you would see a cock as big as his. You felt greedy, you wanted to have his cock inside you immediately, but you did your best to keep that to yourself. You quickly regained consciousness and finished tossing your clothes to the floor.
You stood there for a moment, letting Jeonghan look at you silently, his eyes trailing up and down your body, the smallest hint of a smile crossing his lips.
“God, you may be a pathetic slut, but you are absolutely gorgeous,” he said. He pointed down to the floor in front of his spread legs and then leaned back on his hands. “Come on. Show me what you can do. Show me that you’re not just a waste of time.”
You immediately dropped to your knees, squeezing yourself between his legs, your hands wrapping around the base of his cock. You stared at it for a second, just admiring his cock, before suddenly remembering what you were supposed to be doing.
You sucked the tip of his cock into your mouth, moaning around it, just relived to have a cock inside of your mouth. You whined as you pressed his cock deeper inside of your mouth, getting too excited and pressing his cock further into your mouth.
You barely thought about it as you pushed your mouth as far down his cock as you could, choking almost immediately. You gagged around his cock, pulling off and coughing to the side.
“You’re so big,” you said between coughs. Jeonghan scoffed.
“You’re just not trying hard enough.”
He slid his fingers into the strands of your hair and pushed your head back down on his cock.
“If it’s too much for you, just tap my thigh,” Jeonghan said, before beginning to push you down. He pushed you to the part where you first started coughing, but he didn’t stop there. He kept pushing, ignoring your gags as he eased you down on his cock.
Your fingers squeezed against his thighs, but you were halfway down his cock, and you wanted to be good so fucking badly. But despite that, Jeonghan pulled you off of his cock, letting you gasp for air.
“No, no,” you insisted. “I was okay. I’m okay, push me back down.”
Jeonghan’s eyebrow quirked.
“Really?” And the heightening of his voice made it clear just how surprised he was.
“Please.”
Jeonghan was quick to push you back down on his cock, this time going even faster than before. Despite your gags, he finally pushed you to the base of his cock. Your nose brushed against his pelvis, and tears ran down your cheeks, but after a few moments you felt your breathing through your nose began to even out, and your throat settled around his cock.
Jeonghan’s tight grip on your hair loosened, and his fingers threaded through your strands in a way that was almost comforting.
“You certainly are a determined slut,” Jeonghan praised. “Go ahead then, show me what your worth.”
You slowly raised yourself off of his cock, now finally able to really show Jeonghan what you were made of. You began to work his cock in and out of your mouth, hollowing it every now and then while one of your hands fiddled with his balls.
If you were insecure about your blowjob abilities, you weren’t with the way that Jeonghan was moaning at your actions. His fingers had settled down around the base of your neck, squeezing ever so slightly when a particularly loud moan left his mouth, a good girl sure to follow.
All it did was make you that much wetter. You were pretty sure that at his point you were literally dripping on his floor, but you didn’t care. As Jeonghan’s cock twitched in your mouth, you felt excitement course through you.
You could tell he was getting close.
You picked up your pace, sucking his cock with even more determination. You could taste the salty precum dribbling from the tip of his cock.
Jeonghan’s fingers suddenly tightened in your hair, and he yanked you up off of his cock. You coughed, trying to catch your breath.
“You’re such a disgusting whore, you want my cum that much?” Jeonghan asked. You whined, your fingers reaching forward trying to wrap back around his dick.
“Please, Jeonghan. I’ve been so good, I deserve it,” you pleaded. He scoffed.
“That’s for me to decide,” he said. “And I don’t think I want to put my cum anywhere then in this-” He gave your pussy a slap- not too hard. It was as if he was testing to see how you would react to it. It was just hard enough for you to yelp and jerk slightly. Jeonghan hummed. “Cunt.”
He pulled you up by the hair, pulling you close to him. He roughly slammed his lips to yours, his mouth sucking your bottom lip into his, his teeth nipping down on it just enough to puff it up.
“You want that? You want me to come in your pathetic cunt?” You were nodding enthusiastically at the question, but Jeonghan barely took note of it before pushing you face down into his bed. He grabbed you by your hips and pulled your ass up so that he could line the tip of his cock to your leaking cunt.
“God, you’re such a little whore. You’re going to make such a mess on my bed. You're dripping all over it.”
You whined, as Jeonghan pressed two of his fingers deep inside of you without any warning. You couldn’t help the way you laid your head to the side, your tits brushing aginst the comforter in a way that made you shiver.
“I wonder if you even really deserve my cock.”
You propped up onto your elbows, turning to look at Jeonghan with large eyes. You had never been with a man that had made you this desperate before in your life. Sure, you loved sex but there was something about Jeonghan that made you a complete different person. All that you could think about was his thick cock and having it pressed deep inside of you.
Just the suggestion of being filled with his cum made your mouth drool and you had never let a stranger fuck you without a condom. But with Jeonghan? It was all you wanted. You felt feral.
“Please Jeonghan I’ve been so good. I need your cock, I need it so bad. I don’t even have to cum I just need your cock in me. I need you to fill me with your cum,” you begged. Jeonghan reached forward, his cock still just brushing your soaking folds. His fingers wrapped around your throat, and he pulled you up by it, momentarily constricting your airways. You gasped desperately as Jeonghan pressed his face to yours.
“You’re so fucking pathetic. Begging a stranger to fill you with cum.”
He pushed you back down on the bed, pressing his hand on your back as to press your ass further in the air.
“But I pity a whore who has done this much and still needs a cock in her. So I’ll humor you.”
Without warning, Jeonghan pushed his cock inside of you, all the way down to the hilt. Your whole body jolted forward before you even realized what had happened and you cried out at the sudden intrusion. You unashamedly practically screamed at every thrust, your fingers digging into Jeonghan’s sheets as he fucked his cock into you.
He didn’t seem to care about the way that you were barely able to keep yourself up on the bed. All he cared about was digging his fingers into your hips to the point at which you knew there would be bruises there the next day.
“God, you’re so fucking loud. Do you know that? Do you really want everyone to know how pathetic you are.”
You didn’t even care how humiliating it was.
“Yes Jeonghan. Fuck your cock feels so fucking good,” you sobbed into his sheets. “Thank you, thank you, thank you.”
Jeonghan snickered.
“I need to see how absolutely pathetic you look right now,” Jeonghan said. He pulled himself out of you and flipped you on the bed. You instantly spread your legs out for him, and he grabbed your thighs to pull you close to him, and without warning reinserted himself inside of you.
He pressed down on your belly fucking you fast and hard. You felt your eyes flutter closed as he fucked you, but it didn’t last long.
“Open your eyes you whore,” he snapped. You felt a slight pain on your cheek, your eyes shooting open as you realized that Jeonghan had lightly slapped you. You felt your walls tighten around Jeonghan’s cock, and a loud moan escaped your lips.
“Oh, you like that?” Jeonghan asked. He laughed and dragged you up and scooped the back of your neck up so that you were forced to look at him dead in the eyes. “You like it when I slap you like the fucking slut you are? You are depraved, you know that? Useless to anything other than being fucked.”
Jeonghan’s other hand lowered to your clit, and he pressed down on it hard.
“You’re going to cum aren’t you?” Jeonghan observed. You wondered what gave it away. The mascara surely running down your face as tears of pleasure left your eyes or the way you were desperately grinding your hips down on Jeonghan’s cock.
“You’re going to cum after being treated like absolutely useless trash.”
You were barely listening to him, lost in the sensation of his fingers on your clit and his cock slamming so deep into your pussy that every few seconds you had to practically scream a moan.
“Open your mouth whore.” You immediately opened it, sticking your tongue out. You watched as Jeonghan leaned forward, spitting into your open mouth. “Now fucking swallow.”
You swallowed obediently.
“Now thank me. Thank me for fucking spitting in your mouth like the whore you are.”
“Thank you,” you blurted out. “Thank you so much for fucking me even though I barely deserve it.”
“You’re self aware,” Jeonghan murmured. He spit again, this time on your cheek and smeared it over your face with another slap. “I’m going to cum, you hear me? And if you want to cum you will only do it after I do.”
You could barely keep yourself conscious, much less control the fact that your orgasm was rapidly approaching.
“And if you do cum before me, I’m going to fucking splatter my semen all over my face and you are going to go back down to that party and explain to everyone that you were bad and you didn’t deserve to have my cum in your cunt, do you hear me?”
You nodded, but it wasn’t enough for Jeonghan. He reached forward and slapped you again, this time harder.
“Thank you,” you cried out, the slap only making it harder not to cum. “I hear you, I understand. Please cum Jeonghan, please fill me up. I need to feel your cum inside me, I want it so much.”
You kept babbling, making Jeonghan roll his eyes.
“God you really are so pathetic.”
He pushed two of his fingers into your mouth, momentarily gagging you, but just as he did so you felt warm ropes of cum begin to fill your cunt. You cried around Jeonghan’s fingers, your body shaking as you tried to hold back your own orgasm.
You started to beg against Jeonghan’s fingers again, to the point where he had to remove them as he continued to fuck his cum deep inside of you.
“Please, can I cum now? I need to Jeonghan, I need to cum.”
Jeonghan hummed.
“You think you deserve to? You really think you get to cum on my cock?”
You nodded desperately but it wasn’t enough. All of a sudden Jeonghan pulled away from you. His cock slipping from your pussy. You felt tears rolling even faster down your face as you realized what he was taking away from you. You fell forward to your knees, grabbing at Jeonghan’s thighs as you practically crawled towards him.
“Thank you so much Jeonghan. Thank you for your cum, thank you, thank you,” you babbled incoherently. “But please, I want to cum. I want it so badly.”
“Yeah?” Jeonghan asked, honestly looking bored of you. He leaned down, grabbing you by the hair, ripping your head back roughly. “You think you can handle being choked baby? Think you can come just from my hands wrapped around your neck?”
“I... Please, I need more. Just a little more. Your thigh? Please, can I at least have your thigh?”
Jeonghan sighed, shaking his head.
“Pathetic, absolutely pathetic.”
But still he lifted you up so that you were sat on his thigh and his eyes wrapped around your throat.
“You can’t breath until you cum.”
His fingers tightened around your throat but it didn’t even matter, you found yourself silently screaming Jeonghan’s name as you rolled your hips down on Jeonghan’s thigh, feeling your walls spasm as Jeonghan’s cum leaked out of your swollen pussy.
Jeonghan’s hands loosened around your throat and your forehead fell forward on Jeonghan’s head. You were quick with your thank you’s yet again, fingers squeezing his thigh.
The orgasm was practically painful at the lack of Jeonghan’s cock in your pussy, but you were still thankful to have it at all. You tilted your head up, your nose brushing against Jeonghan’s. You looked up at him, lips curled up into a tired smile.
He hummed looking at you.
“You know what? You did deserve to cum,” he mumbled. He grabbed you by your hips, lowering you back down on his cock. He lifted you up, pressing you against as wall before beginning to rail you again. You were so sensitive but you didn’t even care. You wrapped your arms around Jeonghan’s shoulders, thanking him over and over again until he was cumming deep inside of you again.
“Now cum you pathetic slut. Cum all over my cock.”
You felt both Jeonghan’s cum and your own slick leaking out of your pussy around his cock as another orgasm ripped through you. As soon as you came down from your high, your face fell into Jeonghan’s chest.
“Fuck, Jeonghan, I’ve... I’ve never been fucked like that in my life.”
Jeonghan pulled you off of his cock, carrying you over to his bed, laying your head down on the pillow.
“Yeah? It wasn’t too much?” He asked you softly. You were surprised by the tone of his voice. You looked up at him, taking note of the gentle look on his face.
It was like he was a completely different person.
“Too much?” You asked with a laugh. “No, I loved every second of it.”
Your face flushed bright red.
“Will I ever admit to anyone the way I let you treat me and how much I liked it?” You asked. “Absolutely not, that goes to my grave but... I would let you do it again.”
Your eyes flickered away from Jeonghan’s but you heard the hum that left his mouth regardless.
“I’m going to draw a bath for you and get you something to drink okay?” Jeonghan said. You whined in protest.
“I don’t want to get up.”
“I don’t care, you need to get cleaned off.”
He looked away from you.
“Are you on birth control? Do you need me to buy you some plan B?”
You waved it off.
“I’m sure I’ll be okay.” You tried to lean up by propping yourself up on your elbows, but you were too weak.
“You can spend the night,” Jeonghan said. “I’ll be back for you in a second.”
You were silently for a second.
“Thank you.”
“It’s the bare minimum,” Jeonghan laughed. “I’ll be back.”
The door shut between him and as you rolled over you were lucky enough to find your phone with a message from Jeongyeon.
Hey, you’re not with Chan? Where’d you get off to?
Your face burned.
Ended up with someone else. Don’t wait up for me.
You let your head fall back down against the fluffy pillow. You certainly hoped that this would not be the last time that you saw Jeonghan.
-
“Jeonghan, did you really have to steal Chan’s date like that?” Jun sighed. Jeonghan looked up from his legos, eyebrows high.
“Steal? She came in my room. All I did was what she wanted me to do.”
“It was fine, she wasn’t feeling me,” Chan said dismissively. “Honestly not really my type either.”
“But exactly mine,” Jeonghan said, a smirk crossing his lips. “Jun, if you had told me sooner that Jeongyeon had such a dirty friend, I would have settled for one fuck buddy ages ago.”
Jun groaned, burying his face in his hands.
“And now I know too much about y/n.”
“Now?” Jihoon blurted. “You were lucky. You were downstairs at the party. I could hear every depraved thing Jeonghan said to that girl. And she thanked him for it.”
“As someone at the party,” Soonyoung piped up. “We could hear it too. Please tell me that she’s not a keeper.”
Jeonghan didn’t say anything. He just turned his attention back to his food, but everyone at the table could tell by the smile on his face, that there wouldn’t be much peace in the house the next time y/n was around.
Part Two: The Art of Humiliation
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princeofheartsarts · 24 days
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I think it’s just sank in that since iblis was confirmed canon to the movie universe, there’s a possibility (maybe even a probability) that silver will appear in the movie universe sometime in the future and that makes me happier then anything ever
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themyscirah · 4 days
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Complaining abt Suicide Squad yet again but the fact that they have Waller exposing the alien community to space racist attacks and talking abt how she got to her position through deceit and being a terrible person and stuff is just. Ahsfiwueh JUST SAY YOU DONT KNOW WALLER.
Anyways literally the 3rd mission of the Squad ever (and the first framed as smth Waller picked and not orders from above) was the Squad discrediting and stopping a rogue vigilante who was only arresting POC and funneling white people into white supremacy groups (of which he was the most prominent member) in SUICIDE SQUAD #4. and it's explicitly framed as this mission being personal for Waller that she's hiding from the government bc its illegal like. Guys. Please why are we having her incite (space bc comics) racist attacks now
Also the whole "Amanda got her position through deceit and being a terrible person" NO. she KEPT her position through being shitty and playing complicated political games!!! She wasn't always that way like there is a difference and it is IMPORTANT ppl PLEASEEEE. In Secret Origins #14 we learn Amanda's backstory and she used to be a normal, caring person! Like even after she entered into working in government and politics she wasn't automatically morally bankrupt like please people. She was originally given control of the Squad by Reagan (*sigh* 80s comics...) to distract and get rid of her because she was so successful at pushing progressive social policy in Congress. Acting like she's this static pillar of evil is such a waste of her character and so fucking uninteresting and disrespectful to her arc it drives me MAD.
Like I am NOT saying Waller is all sunshine and rainbows, she fucking SUCKS (said w love <3) but like there's a human being there. It's a progression, she has a character arc like please, DC, please!!! They've fucked up Waller so bad and made her so opaque and uninteresting she can't even be the protagonist of her own story for fucks sake!
Like I don't know how many times I have to scream it until DC hears me or remembers but WALLER IS THE MAIN CHARACTER OF SUICIDE SQUAD. ITS HER BOOK. yet right now she's a cutout to be used as the villain wherever the writers please. Even in her book we get none of her perspective really displayed, no exploration of her thoughts with any kind of understanding of the role she traditionally has played and was made to play in the story.
#its like youre unable to root for her in any form. which is annoying bc shes actually awesome actually#also having her say “actually im the good guy fuck you'' w/o any actual deep analysis of her psyche or whatever while doing these things#doesnt count as development or showing shes 3 dimensional. its just having 2 dimensional waller say shes right when everyone is obviously#supposed to believe shes wrong#anyways i want real waller back please i miss herrrrrrrr#anyways hope mr john ridley has read secret origins no 14. i know its from 1987 but please guys please. my only hope#also it was a few months ago but i think they tried to push certain elements of a diff backstory in dream team and sorry but fuck that. and#any mention of another waller background like my eyes are closed sry. im a preboot truther#actually im just ignorant of most squad comics outside the original series. im gonna do a readthrough and become knowledgeable on other#stuff i just need to find time. so if im wrong then sorry if its smth factual and if you disagree with my opinion then uh sorry for ur loss#anyways shoutout to the time i had a nerd night w my one friend and she was asking me abt dc and said my favorite villains and i said waller#and silver swan. and she had a “yuck WHY” to waller and a ???? to silver swan. love shouting out my faves and explaining them to the less#informed. didnt say a number 3 but would probably be parallax ig. idk hes kind of slay. or maybe someone else honestly i like hal but waller#and nessie are blorbo level for me i could think abt them for hours#or maybe it wouldnt be parallax actually idk who my 3 would be. hes definitely up there but way below the other 2. maybe the cheetah#interpretation that i personally have. v different from the popular cheetah interpretation esp rucka vers actually. much closer to the pérez#and esp develops some subtext there surrounding barbara and the exploitation and theft of sacred cultural artifacts and pieces but also#like british colonization a lil bit#but i actually despise the cheetah that lives in my head but think shed be interesting to use narratively and see diana fight#vs the other guys who i find interesting and sympathetic and like for themselves#whereas my fave interpretation of cheetah can rot in hell#i got off topic here#blah#swishy rant#also disclaimer that w the main character ik dreamer is the main character of dream team. im talking more in general and that amanda should#always have a huge role as shes the main character of the squad and yet is treated like its villain and not its protag#sui sq
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fisheito · 3 months
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rediscovered some eiden trivia in vampire yaku's rooms (R3 to be exact)!!!
idk if it's mentioned in other rooms, but eito has a scar on his head from around the time he left the orphanage. exact location unknown but
- he needs to part his hair to get to it
- can't see it so he forgets about it
- sometimes feels it when he washes his hair
Reason: one of his bosses [nepotism megadouche] was spouting foul things about orphans
Eiden was so pissed off even after going home that he smashed a glass out of rage and TADA!! CONSEQUENCE[shard heckin GOT 'IM]!
He says it feels embarrassing to bring up his former hotheadedness...how his uncontrolled rage in that moment is now immortalised in his scar..... the sides of himself he wants to hide from others..........
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nico-the-overlord · 3 months
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Don’t wanna find the post rn but I just found this guy pretty sure more got added to this desc
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inkskinned · 2 years
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he had to hurt her like that, look at the cinema he made. did he? how do you know? the ends justify the means, huh. a woman could never actually act this well, it had to be real, a snuff film. yes, she was hired for her talent - but pain will make the talent brighter, right.
he is not alone. there are men around him who think like this. who choose actresses they can manipulate, exert power over. who write scripts that demand the pain be felt. she must hurt to uphold the message.
(an aside. author's note, i guess. in poetry, when the words cannot hold themselves up, we actually blame the writers. it shouldn't matter who speaks the literature. the words should carry their own weight. be their own scaffolding.)
the men in the room all applaud each other for doing less. they say they push boundaries. they're leaders in their field. they ask the hard questions.
when they get your resume, they put it into a pile that they will put into a trashcan. when they get your screenplay, they will use it as a coaster. when they build their museums, they will have a disjointed room dedicated to "repairing" the ways that women and people of color have been eradicated from "fine arts". it will be self-effacing. we may have overlooked some artists, they apologize. but really it's not our fault that white men make better art. (those men and their works are in permanent displays. for more on this, see: the way that he laughs at your work will make you sick to your teeth). in six weeks, their apology will be scrubbed and the room will be scrubbed and all the paintings will go back into storage.
they know they are right. sure, okay. maybe we have had less opportunities. but what would we have done with them? not something like this. it took a man to do this. okay, okay. it was deranged, we can all agree about it. but look at the product.
in your life, when you wake up, isn't it grand. if they made a museum for people like us, it would be a cycle of empty frames. of ruined videos. of songs with a voicecrack. all the little plaques reading some variation of a theme. here is where my work would stand if someone like me could actually get published in this fucking industry. here is the work i tried to make, before my agency was stripped from me. here is the placeholder of my dreams, but i could not afford them in this society.
if you keep walking, out in the greenhouse out back, the whole world is full of color. every fabric and fortuneteller and feverdream we spat out in despite. centuries of brightness, of novelty, of exploration. of talent, of wisdom, of creativity.
there is only one sign here in this alexandrian library. the sign acts like an epitaph. you already know what it says, don't you. THIS ISN'T ART, it tells you.
the blankets. the chef-level 5-course meals. the carefully-colored journal pages. the abandoned works-in-progress. the library of fanfiction. the margin drawings. somewhere in there, an actress makes a face, and you think - oh shit! she's really broken! but then she smiles at you, winking. she could do it, you know. she could always act like a starbeam. it's just that his name is the one scrolling at the bottom. she hadn't wanted to undress for him. she goes home and gets forgotten. in our museum, another blank frame goes up on the wall.
they'll give him an award, looking to the camera with almost an apology. he will laugh ruefully. nobody will do anything. little white strings will drip from his fingers. young boys in film studies will continue to chainsmoke while explaining how beautiful it is that there's violence in those scenes. she couldn't have done it without him pushing, he'll tell you, shrugging.
but what if, you wonder. what if he had never existed? without him, what else could we be making? all that time and love and spirit, allowed back into the light. into knowledge. what has he taken, to give us his art?
and is it a trade worth making?
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"I'm not your pet, I never liked you, I never cared about you, I won't wait for you. I bite."
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VS "I'm not a violent dog. I don't know why I bite.."
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(ermmm pointing to who made me draw this... you know who you are...ermm.. (didn't make me but ermm) comparing Thad to Isle Of Dogs has me sobbing goodbye guys...)
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